The Pat McAfee Show - PMS 2.0 026 - A Very Vitamin Thursday

Episode Date: November 29, 2018

On today's show, Pat breaks down his trip to New York City for his appearance on Get Up, and dives into everything he ran into while in the Big Apple including his hotel room and travel issues, why his Uber driver had a big problem with Chinatown, and why he can never buy any of the knockoff items that the vendors sell there. Pat and the guys also discuss a wide range of topics including a new weight loss challenge starting on New Years Day between a couple of the guys in the office, they talk about what's going on in the NBA thus far this year and whether or not Kevin Durant is leaving the Warriors, chat a little more about the For The Brand brand, and break down some things floating around the NFL while also looking ahead to tonight's Thursday Night Football matchup featuring the Saints and the Cowboys. It's a great time. Come and laugh with us, cheers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Now you're listening to a podcast that I'm recording after flying home late at night. And you are going to enjoy this very vitamin conversation that takes place just a few minutes from now. We are broadcasting live from the mybookie.ag studio. Sure, watching football is fun, but it's more entertaining when you have some action on the games. I'll say. That is what you say. It changes everything. I say it every time. I say it every time.

People say this. You watch these games with action on them? It's awesome. People say that. You say that all the time. I do. I just said it the other day. I was like, hey, this game's way more interesting. So you got money on it. Guys, you've heard Todd talking about this for weeks. And some of you are still on the sidelines.

Why are you on the sidelines. Why are you on the sidelines? What are you doing? You're not a punter in this situation. No. You don't spend your whole life on the sidelines just waiting for those seconds to get on the field. You're the quarterback of this operation. You're in there calling the shots,

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Oh yeah. It's not really gambling anymore, by the way, if you listen to this show. It's investing in you. Pretty much. Pretty much. Also, make sure to follow at BetMyBookie on Twitter. They personally respond to every mention and DM. Not to mention they've given away more than $10,000 in free money to their followers this football season. That's crazy. You'll be the first to know as soon as the odds and props are posted.

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Just listen. Ipso facto, which happens later. Ipso facto, you listen to this show, you're a smart person. True. Big old brain on you. That's how that works. I bet you there's a lot of dummies that listen to this show, too. Nope.

I'm sure it's a well-rounded crowd. I think there's probably some fucking idiots that listen to this show, too. Nope. I'm sure it's a well-rounded crowd. I think there's probably some fucking idiots that listen to this show. I'm sure there are. Probably right in the meaty part of the curve. I'm sure there's some really smart ones, too. I'd like to let them all know, no matter how stupid you are, I'm a big fan of yours, too. Yeah, we got Zito. Yeah.

The people that aren't big fans of us, we never hang out with them anyway, so who cares? Losers. It's tough for me to care about people that tweet on the internet bad things to any of us, we never hang out with them anyway, so who cares? It's tough for me to care about people that tweet on the internet bad things to any of us. Because it's like, yeah, we probably never hang out with you anyways. But you people who listen, you good people.

I've heard a lot worse from a lot of people who actually I do care about. Okay. Okay, guys. Thank you for the heart. You know, having a podcast used to be complicated a lot of things

used to be complicated and confusing yeah oh yeah wouldn't you say Todd yeah air travel fucking

right off the side of the barn on that first one you see in the video starting fire the Wright brothers had no chance those Wright brothers had no goddamn chance

now gender reveals are starting fucking fires. They used to have to take two sticks back in the goddamn day. We're just falling into these terrible things now. Fire's bad now. Back in the day, it was the best thing ever. Fire's good. You used to travel for weeks trying to find fire. Whenever the lightning hit last, there was fire.

Todd's free of his childhood. We're going to take all this fire stuff out. We have to. I don't want to put a pause button on the fun. Eight million dollars in damage. It used to be

complicated and confusing. Like air travel. I think you keep all of that now. Ads used to be complicated and confusing So did buying tickets Yeah Tickets used to be so complicated and confusing You buy one set of tickets You know what happens

You get another set of tickets And sometimes you get tickets To the thing you think you're getting tickets to It turns out it's tickets to something else It's tough Catfishing Ticket fishing I respect that thing you think you're getting tickets to, it turns out it's tickets to something else. Catfishing. Ticket fishing.

I respect that. SeatGeek is the greatest ticket buying app on Earth. Right now, there's a chance to buy a ticket on SeatGeek for Zito's chair that has been left in the basement. I think it was a dumb joke. SeatGeek is the one place to go if you want to buy tickets for anything.'s chair. There's been a lot of people. I think it was a dumb joke. SeatGeek is the one place to go if you want to buy tickets for anything. The sporting event, we got a lot of great sports happening right now. College football is all the way here. All the way.

All the way is here. NBA is right starting to heat up. Then you got NFL football. It's about to get real fucking nasty. Also got comedy shows, theater shows, Broadway shows, all those things. Go ahead and buy your tickets from SeatGeek because they're good people. Good people selling great tickets to incredible people like you. What you buy is what you get.

And they're obviously the best price because they scan all the other ticket websites and find you the most bang for your buck. You put your budget in, they'll find you the best possible tickets. That's why SeatGeek is the best option for you if you're going to buy a ticket. Buy SeatGeek. Use the SeatGeek app. Your first order, you use promo code Pat. You get $10 off your first purchase. That's why SeatGeek is the best option for you If you're going to buy a ticket Buy SeatGeek Use the SeatGeek app Your first order You use promo code Pat You get $10 off your first purchase

That's not bad That's good You use promo code McAfee You get $20 That's a little better Every time we do this I always wonder Does anybody use Pat instead of McAfee?

And then I remember We got some fucking dummies Speaking of dummies Here's a bunch of them talking from earlier today I'm fucking tired man I bet I am fucking tired

you have to go to Texas this morning 4.45am the fucking thing goes off and I just looked at it what am I doing so I hit the snooze now we're at 4.54 one more time everybody now 6 o'clock meeting we have

10 minute walk six we keep it moving 603 612 all the way up to about 630 something and i was like all right i guess i'll get up i got ready in 20 minutes and the show's called get up i'm fucking tired. I am fucking tired. Last night, way to change hotel rooms. Why? TV didn't work. Dude. Is that like a New York thing that happened like three or four times?

They don't give a fuck. Remember I had no curtain, no blinds. I always ended up in a bad room. I enjoyed that one. I enjoyed that one a lot. No blinds. I enjoyed that one a lot. Just the things.

See the sights. Ties room you can see in, right? No, but I had that one. I enjoyed that one a lot. No blinds. I enjoyed that one a lot. Just the things. See the sights. Ty's room, you can see in, right? No, but I had a crack. I saw a kid poking his eyes. Some little kid was peeking into fucking Zito's room. Scoot! That was a good time. Ty, what did you say?

Why were the blinds missing? Yeah, because some guy jumped out the window and tried to grab them. He changed his mind at the last second. Some of those little clips at the top were like shredded too, so it was like a regretful yell. Yep. New York, what a fucking place.

Best city owner. That Seaport place though, that Seaport area where the ESPN cities are, really nice down there. You gotta respect a town that keeps a brick floor. That Seaport place, though. That Seaport area? Yeah. Where the ESPN studios are? Really nice down there. You got to respect a town that keeps a brick floor. Cobblestone? Road?

You got to respect a town? First of all, New York City. You got to respect a town that keeps a brick floor. A street floor. He's been on one today. There's this place. I said this last time. There's this place, and I said this last time, there's a place called Big Gay Ice Cream. It's right on the cobblestone.

It's a funny seat. What's funny, Zito? It's happy ice cream. What is that? It's happy ice cream. He didn't wear a shirt today. He didn't wear a shirt to work. He's still not wearing one.

And he said it's because he was upstairs. Go up there for like two minutes. You'll die. I don't go up there. I would die because that's like your haven. It's like you're home away from home up there for like two minutes you'll die I don't go up there I would die because that's like your haven it's like your home away from home

but they put out a huge bench in front of it this time and they like set it up for a photo basically and it's this big rainbow wooden bench

I'm posting it tomorrow morning it's my good morning one big gay ice cream right above my head pitch black nobody else on the street except for me and Sam i loved it good picture i had a great picture i look it's very are we even looking off in one of them uh-huh yeah yeah yeah real artsy yeah i'm fucking tired when in new york when in new york you gotta do it this morning when i'm in

new york what it seems to happen is um i just work and then I fly out. Then I fly in and then I work and then I fly out. It's the most busy fucking- That's normal. The last time we were there, me and Foxy walked 72 blocks. Oh, yeah. 72 blocks, didn't eat any food, had 72 meetings and flew out. What did you eat today? No, I had pizza at the airport because there was a delay.

Well, yeah, always airport food for us. Always airport food. Always. There was a big delay. There was a big delay. Two, three delays. I was supposed to come back tomorrow. Yeah yeah i guess this storm has really fucked some shit i was supposed to come back tomorrow and that meeting was suspect so i flew back today and

then we hit three delays and just sat in laguardia airport learned a lot about that place they're rebuilding it right now it's the the worst. It's terrible. It's the worst. It was supposed to be done 2020. The taxi driver told me they're predicting 2022. But I think 2030 is what he says. And there was only seven people working. We drove around to get to our terminal.

And they have all this construction and all these roads are closed. And there's just seven people working. Construction workers? Yeah. It was like seven of them and it was like i feel like they hired like little crews like this one was to do this bridge over here which has nothing to do with the other 40 miles of airport over here but i was driving through the one section uh it's like drop-offs and there's this old man it was awesome he dropped somebody off at the airport for a departure so let's let's just say it was his wife that he's loved for a long time he gets back to his car and you know there's that lane for drop-offs there's cops patrolling there because you can't park there because it's an airport so it's like if you have a bomb in your car you can't sit there yeah this guy on the

driver's side so this is to the side where all the traffic is coming this is 1 30 1 1 30 ish p.m he has his door open he has athletic shorts on lifted up pissing these athletic shorts lifted up and he's just pissing directly at the traffic there's a cop no less than 15 feet away on the other side. It's okay since it's the leg pull-up. Yeah. It's bad if it's a pull-down. So that's a little bit vulgar.

But if you're just lifting it up, it's like, we get it. Especially in New York. It's proper etiquette. I had never seen that until I was on a golf course, and I saw some old dude do that. Oh, he's doing soccer all the time. But this old guy, I saw his dick. I saw this guy's dick in balls.

Hey, nice dick, guy. I saw his dick. I saw this guy's dick in balls. Hey, nice dick, guy. I was so bad. Things happen in front of me on a regular basis. I get to film them. I mean, things happen. I was so bummed in myself, like literally so mad at myself. I was like, Sam, I saw that old guy's dick. She was like, what do you mean?

I was like, he was just pissing. And we turn around, and you see a stream going from his door that was open. I was like, this guy's the best. You haven't been to New York unless you've been to Big Gay Ice Cream. Yep. And you saw a guy going from his door that was open. I was like, this guy's the best. You haven't been to New York unless you've been to Big Gay Ice Cream, and you saw a guy's dick. Yep. Two saggy-ass balls, dude.

The one time you went to New York, and your Uber driver just gets out and pees in the bushes. That happens all the time. I'm telling you, every time I go there, something happens. That guy was jerking off in the phone booth. Too many people, not enough bathrooms. That's all that is. Well, I stepped in human poop that one time. Too many people, not enough bathrooms. That's all that is. Well, I stepped in human poop that one time. Too many people, not enough bathrooms.

Every time I go to New York, something absurd happens. That one time, the morning I woke up, the guy was like, it's called, I don't know the other word for polite. It's called manners. Etiquette? Yeah, it's called etiquette, you fucking asshole. Do you remember that?

And then he started filming me. The guy started filming me because I was filming him. Yeah, it was like as soon as I got up. Every time I'm in New York, something magical happens. Today, it was an old guy pissing at the airport.

He's going to get you the glasses with the camera and just films all the time. That's honestly what you need. Steve Weatherford's on vacation right now and he's doing some filming with that. Oh, yeah? Yeah, he's doing some filming right there.

The road guest. Stop. Steve covers his whole life. That guy needs to relax. I love Steve Weatherford, but he covers every single moment of his life on social media. I'm like, Steve, I love you a lot, but you have 200 posts in your IG story.

I ain't got time for that. Right? I mean, that's an automatic swipe. When you see that little bar, you just go past that. A full-length movie. That IG story, some people are really good on there, though. Yeah. I just forget about it.

I just forget it's up there. I feel like it's up there. Are there stories that long? I've stopped looking at the bottom. I've stopped looking at people's posts, and I only do the stories. I catch myself doing that. Yeah, I've heard this. I've heard this, but I forget the IG stories even there.

I don't look at other people's. I forget to post it. I forget Instagram exists most of the time, but I forget the IG stories even there. I don't look at other people's. I forget to post it. I forget Instagram exists most of the time, but I'm trying to get in there. The IG stories, though, I think that's a real powerful thing. Gary Vee told us. Gary Vee told us years ago that that's where it's going to be. That's where the cash is at.

YouTube and IG stories. Let me penetrate your ears. There we go. I'm asking. All I'm asking is, no matter who you are out there, no matter what you're going through, no matter how old you are, let me penetrate you.

That's Hall of Fame for me. That's all-time Hall of Fame. Gary Vee reached out to me the other day when I commented on the game. He told me congrats and good luck and all that stuff. I was like, thanks, man. I appreciate that. It was very nice of him because he never shared our...

Did he ask about the baseball document? He did not. He did not. Was he trying to push earth and skies? Dirt and clouds. Dirt and clouds. Earth and skies. Earth and skies.

All I saw was brown and baby blue. That is a rough... He works in mysterious ways. We'll never catch on to his antics. We'll never know. We wanted him to show the baseball documentary. He flew to New York to go through all that. He didn't do it. He'll just send you a pair of shoes or he'll say congratulations

on the commentating thing. Out of nowhere. He does work in mysterious... Gary V does work in mysterious ways. He's a shaman. He spreads advice and magic all the time. Social media shaman. What's that guy's name that I was going to get into

really heavy? Tony Robbins? That guy. I think Gary Vee kind of took Gary Robbins. Has he been around for a while? Tony Robbins. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. I think they dropped a reference to him in Tommy Boy. Oh, yeah. He was in Shallow Hell. Shallow Hell, man, yeah. He was in the elevator.

That's what happened. I think he's the OG of like... Those guys. OGs. I already told you my problem with him. What is it? Well, he's talking about not having worries or any problems. He's making fucking $7 million a week.

It's tough to be relatable. I said on Get Up that Patrick Mahomes is relatable because he likes ketchup. That's my only reason. And during the break, Greeny was like, he's not relatable at all. His dad was an MLB pitcher. Deshaun Watson came from a house

that Ward Dunn built for him. He's more relatable than Patrick Rose. I was like, yeah, but he likes ketchup. He likes ketchup though. And Greeny was like, fucking ketchup. I don't think he said fucking ketchup.

He was like, ketchup. And he like laughed and turned his back. And I was like think i got greeny he just he just because he's got 100 things going on in his ear about all these papers he got to read and in the he was like relatable you think he's going to sleep right now he's like ketchup ketchup he's been weirdly nice what do you mean i don't know he's been weirdly nice i didn't he's he's legend now he's always seems like a nice guy to me like when you listen yeah well it looked like he was smiling at you a little more today he was he was very happy to see you if you scroll through my twitter in the production meeting we talked about this earlier he was they were trying to figure out

what questions they were going to ask me in the pre-production meeting that one at 6 a.m where i or where i woke up at 5 40 after the snoozes that production meeting so he was going through my twitter and the first video he clicked on was us going oh and that was when ty got fucking branded so he literally was watching this in the middle of a production meeting and i hear it and he's like sorry that was my phone i was like uh that was actually a brand actually by the way, that's what you do on the internet. When you sell 10,000 items, you just brand somebody. Yeah, it could have been me. It wasn't.

Thank God. A lot of people said they thought I was going to take one for the team there, by the way. A lot of people said that they thought I was going to. I was like, why would I be so selfish? That's not the rules. I'm not going to steal Ty's moment. We are a team here at this small business. I wouldn't have let you.

Well, a lot of people, not a lot of people. I've gotten like four texts. Like my dad told me he thought I was just going to take it, which that one kind of was like. Do these people even know you? My dad couldn't take a shot at me right now? Down in the final two, I would have taken it. If it would have came to me, I would have taken it.

But I want to let you know, it's very disgusting what it looks like on your legs. It hurts like a son of a bitch today. It hurts real bad today. Hey, did you hear me say some people are saying that Aaron Rodgers is tanking so he can get Michael Garvey fired? The internet. The internet. That's you?

Yeah, that was me. Yeah, that's 100% you. I know, I was jacked up. Yeah, and as I was saying it, I was just thinking how fucking pissed off you are. It was, as I was saying it, I was so, I was just thinking of how fucking pissed off you are. It was good. Lefkoe went on a run on Bleach Report, by the way. Same type of thing. Yeah, I saw that.

Yeah, he did, didn't he? Yeah. Bleach Report also with the Lev Bell with the luck thing. Yeah. Interesting. Y'all motherfuckers got billions of dollars over there. Catch up, bro. They got a fucking tweet deck up with all the Pat shit on it.

Just one column. They also put your guys' voices in the Tiger Woods thing. Yeah, putting your show in the promos. Hey, buy that. Buy away. Cease and desist, bro. We don't want to be

a part of that shitty broadcast. Hey, man. We probably get a portion of that nine mil then. There's no money. They lost money. Everybody's giving

their money back. Yep. Everybody. Phil got money. Phil's the only one that got money. I bet you him and Tiger spent that all in one night

in Vegas. I would be surprised if they spent all the $300,000 or $400,000 With Charles, I bet you I didn't get to watch it I didn't get to watch it I took a shot at it during that Baylor thing Now that the dust has settled Is that a sustainable type thing? No

They gotta make a lot of changes They gotta do it the right way They need them to be talking shit to each other It got to make a lot of changes. Yeah, they got to do it the right way. They need them to be talking shit to each other. It needs to be a competition. We're talking, period. We're talking, yeah. What was the first conversation?

Don't you just hate when you miss your kids out on Touring Tigers? Like, yeah, Phil, that happens to me for sure. Yeah, I hate that too. I miss my kids so much. The minute the match got tight,

they went back into professional golfer mode and they were both quiet as hell and super intense. I miss my kids so much. The minute the match got tight, they went back into professional golfer mode and they were both quiet as hell and super intense. Even at one point, Phil even said, he's like, I'm trying to talk more, but I'm really just kind of into what I'm doing right now. He was like, yeah. Weren't they playing like shit, though? Yeah, they don't make a single putt outside of like five feet.

So you know how whenever we average humans are loose, we probably play better golf? Yeah. So for them, when they're loose loose, we probably play better golf? Yeah. So for them, when they're loose, they don't play better golf? Evidently. I doubt it. Like for me, when I was punting, right, when I was loose, I was a lot better. You know what I mean?

Like when I was loose, I was a lot better. Right. And everybody compares punting and kicking to golf. I'd assume if you're. I assume it's like you've always said how when Vinny gets a game winning kick, he just fucking shuts down. Yeah, but he doesn't miss. These motherfuckers are missing, right?

So maybe that's the thing I was thinking about. If they're not playing good, so why are they? Their golf wasn't terrible. Their putting was bad. Yeah. So they probably haven't putted in months probably. That's what their everyone's excuse was. And they were giving them, like, on some of the closer putts,

especially in overtime towards the end, they were just letting them pick it up if it was within five feet. There's a lot of money on the line here. I like that move, though. The gentleman's move. I like that. It's bullshit because it's not just their money on the line. They were gimmies.

They were very close. You don't want to win on a three-footer. Who's you? I don't. What if I am not in there and I'm betting? Say I'm not Tiger or Phil. Say me and you were playing. Yeah.

And there's millions of dollars being gambled on us playing. Right. Like, yo, there's no fucking gimme. Oh, that's true. You know what I mean? From my perspective, yeah. Yeah, Tiger started it and hit the ball. It feels like five foot from the hole.

He could have missed it. Yeah. Probably not, but he could have. I think that's just a cocky move by Tiger. Go ahead. Go ahead. I'll get you. Yeah.

That's fine. It worked out well. Yeah, but I bet. I hammered Tiger Woods. Yeah. He only has 900 mil now. I hammered Tiger Woods. Yeah, we worked out well. Yeah, but I bet. I hammered Tiger Woods. Yeah, he only has 900 mil now. I hammered Tiger Woods. Yeah, we all did. So he just gives that putt away, and that guy misses it.

What? We win. Yeah. I'm like, you just fucked me, bro. Hey, Tiger, you son of a bitch. And then Phil wasn't going to give it back. On the next hole, there was a similar situation. Phil made him line it up.

He was thinking about it, and then he finally did it. That's why you get... Playing head games. If you ever play golf with Phil, Phil Maines, our CFO, he ain't giving anything. No, and you do not give him any either because it's not coming back. Normally, my golf strategy is whoever I'm playing with, I'm going to be nice early. Let's warm them up. Yeah.

Oh, 10... Go ahead. Yeah, you got it. Don't worry about it. It'll come back around, and then Phil, it won't. Phil Maines, it would not come back around. Yeah. Oh, 10. Go ahead. Yeah, you got it. Don't worry about it. It'll come back around. And then Phil, it won't. Phil Maines, it would not come back around. Inside a three foot, I'll give it.

Inside the rubber or the leather, right? It's inside the rubber. Inside the rubber thing. This was way outside. But it's like, yeah, it's that golf etiquette thing. It's not etiquette, though. I'm fucking gambling on that, Tiger. Stop giving Phil Mickelson fucking putts.

I'm with you it's unbelievable i didn't know that was happening i was in a production meeting with the baylor coach wearing a sleeveless hoodie i was so pissed that fucking did the the interview with that producer guy i listened back to i got a text from him today by the way with some critiques really yeah it was funny i got some critiques michael cole loved it michael cole said you are outrageous your fox shit was incredible. I was like, thank you, Michael Cole. That means a lot.

Let me read this, Jesse, guys. Just finished watching the game, and you did a really nice job. Your banter with AJ was great. You kept energy the whole game, which helped the other guys. You sounded confident on the field goals, took it out of break great, like a pro, actually, and really nailed the personal side of the teams. Now we got double space. All right.

I need to work on guys' names instead of numbers. Be careful with the spread talk, parentheses. Clearly you had the over. And try not to get into a story if there's an injury timeout. We don't know how serious it will be. I was like, yeah, good call. It wasn't even a story. Just a fashion statement. And I said, actually, I didn't't bet on the game i just knew where the public money was at

i just threw like a gambling term fucking at his face back at him he's a good guy that was the producer michael cole that was a producer okay that was the the actual producer that's like good notes yeah he's a good that's great feedback that was his first time producing a game too so that's wild good for him it was his first time producing a game so he was he was awesome but those notes yeah very funny he's like just watch the game back listen hey man sorry i didn't have my own spotter okay for the numbers i have four guys down there studying baylor texas tech all year so that is i well when i talked to i got a email from my agents like how do you think you did what was easier or harder than what you thought and i was like it was all pretty easy Because when I talked to, I got an email from my agents. They're like, how do you think you did?

Was it easier or harder than what you thought? And I was like, it was all pretty easy, to be honest. I'm going to be 100% honest. Everybody told me it was going to be very hard. What I probably could have done better, probably could have learned the guy's name. I said, oh, number four, because he's there. And I was like, fuck. In my head, I'm like, oh, on TV, they normally say the guy's name.

Like at a bar, you're like, I think number 27 is, but at home it's like. I will say, though, that's more relatable, though, because even if anyone was out there, they'd be like, oh, that's number four. You know what I'm saying? Well, the issue was, so they got these big-ass cards. AJ has these big-ass cards. I don't remember what their card. There wasn't a Kinkos.

Are they laminated? Yeah, yeah, yeah, with colors on them, like red for Texas Tech, green for baylor and they're these huge like call sheets almost like you see coaches have and they have everybody's name position notes underneath them that aj took him sean kelly and the spotter all had one and then i was staring completely with just nothing in my head pen in your pocket guide me through another one mr god me through another one, Mr. Fake Pen. Guide me through another one. So that would probably help with the names, I'd assume. The punter.

He almost had the punter's name. Kind of. I thought he was an Italian. He's an Italian-Australian. Italian-Australian. I didn't know the Italians, by the way, sent their criminals to Australia way back in the day, too. Did you know that? Everybody did. I didn't know that. I didn't know that. I thought that was just British. They started it, but once they said it, it's like someone's throwing their trash somewhere.

Everyone's got pitches. Oh, that's where we're putting them. We're starting to pile. All right. We'll send them over. We sent the dumb ones to Australia, and we sent the smart ones to America. By the way, I think Australia,

really impressive that they've become the booming country that they are. Diggs doesn't think they're a real one. It was literally just a bunch of criminals. Imagine those democracy talks at the beginning amongst the criminals. Now from different nations, too, with all these goddamn snakes and alligators and shit. And they're just like, boys, listen, we're all going to die out here if we don't fucking look out for each other. It's us versus these goddamn snakes, not versus each other.

And then that's probably how it started. One of them had to go get a boat and go get women. How's that happen? I don't know. They found the most gorgeous of the women. I don't know where they went to get them. Thirsty ass. Hey, man.

The Australian women are up there. But it's very interesting to think about the country of Australia. Because it's honestly a movie. It's a fucking movie. It's basically American England combined. Yeah, Crocodile Dundee. Take it easy on that. That's not nice.

That's a nice. How about when he was selling that out back for Subaru? Is there a new Crocodile Dundee coming out? I keep seeing this commercial. Oh, that was a fake one. Yeah, it was a parody. Danny McBride. Chris Hemsworth.

I don't know if that's the one I saw. How did the women get there? That's a great question. Boat and plane. Airplane. Stuff like that. Because it was all male jail. I would assume back in the day it was all males in jail.

Yeah. Probably some queen, some ugly ass queen was like, round up all the pretty ones, ship them to the island. You think she's just. Yeah, she got cheated on one too many times with the wenches. Send all the wenches there. I'm glad we figured this out. This is good.

Australia. I think if I ever do another comedy thing, which I will, obviously, I am going to schedule one in Australia for sure. Perfect. Because there's a lot of punters down there. Mostly I want to go kick balls down there. I don't want to try that Aussie rules football thing. It spins the other way.

The ball spins the other way. You fucking idiot. I don't know if this conversation has gotten to where Gary Vee works in mysterious ways yet either, but we also talk about that today. So the Lord and Gary Vee work in mysterious ways yet either, but we also talk about that today. So the Lord and Gary Vee work in mysterious ways. Both of them. You'll be excited to hear that conversation whenever it comes. I don't know if it's happening yet or if it's coming later.

Because right now, I need to tell you about learning about you. Yeah, yeah. I did this to me, and it changed everything. It really did. You learned a lot. It changed everything. My entire life, You learned a lot. It changed everything. My entire life, I've been making fun of these fucking Italians. Yep.

My entire life. Now you are one. Little did you know. Little did I know after spitting in this 23andMe thing, I am an Italian. It was like the episode of Seinfeld where Dr. Watley converts to Judaism strictly for the jokes. That's exactly what happened. And now we got you on our side. I'll tell you, I was surrounded by Italians.

Literally all of them. All the people around me were Italians. Nightmare. So obviously I'm going to make fun of Italians. You have to. By the way, Indiana needs Italians. Indiana needs Italians out here i mean i mean granted could we do a little organized crime i think there's probably something happening amongst the the whites the irish could be better but there's good but the food and the culture that

in that italian people bring is next level i never made fun of that. Never, ever made fun of that. No, no, no, you never did. Never would. Never would make fun of that. Just all the other stuff I'd make fun of Italians for. Smelly. Whoa, whoa. Oh, Jesus. Wait a minute. Fuck.

Excuse me. After my 23andMe DNA kit, don't you ever talk about my people again. Never again. You hear me? Oh, I hear you. That's what happened. That's what happened. I used to be on your side. I used, old hear me? Oh, I hear you. That's what happened. That's what happened.

I used to be on your side. I used, old me would have said, yeah, you're right. But new me, now that I know me because of 23 and me, I say, fuck you, Connor. You Irish piece of shit. Yeah. No foul. Have an ass. 23 and me also told me that I'm that as well.

Yeah, fuck you. Yeah, but you got some good in you. Yeah, the Irish part. Oh, wow. Yeah, motherfucker. Oh, Todd jumping into the game. Let's go, Todd. This is interesting.

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By the way, I say aunts. I don't know why I did that. That's actually a thing for me too. I feel like aunts is a south thing. It's northeast, I think. Really? Yeah, we say aunt. I don't like that. It's not a lot to like about that guy.

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I don't know. I need to try it. What makes you tick? I don't know. I need to try it. What makes you tick? I don't know. I need to try it. Not Italian people. It's easy to do. You simply spit into the tube provided in a 23-inch meat kit. Register your sample to you. I heard the shot at me. Yeah. The Italian

shot? Just a.001 shot at you. Nine..009 shot at you. The rest goes to the rest of the room. So I'm only taking.009% of that shot. We got 49.99991, sorry, and then 50. So that was more for Nick than any of the other Italians in the room? Yeah, for sure, for sure.

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That is Christmas. Might have to try that out. You should. What if you're Italian? Maybe you'll find out you're related too. That's like the blind racist from Chappelle. He killed his wife. Might find out you're a low-life classless scumbag from South Boston.

All Irish blood just pouring through your veins. First of all, I don't know if that comes through on 23andMe. If that comes through, my life is made. I can die a happy person. You spit in that thing and they just mail you back a picture of a potato. Yes! Yes! As long as it's not fucking spaghetti, I'm fine.

Shut your mouth. Easy. Let's go back to the conversation. Got the handicap room at the hotel when I got to the second room, by the way, because I had to change it on the TV. Everything's so interesting in handicap rooms, man. The fucking shower, there's no tub, so the water you shower, you're walking on ice.

Oh, yeah, we've done that problem at all. In New in new york a lot of hotels you gotta lay the towel down how much bigger really i put the um i put the whole um robe the robe down i put two robes down outside of the goddamn thing it was like a guy who that is there a chair in the shower yeah yeah and then the mobile the the lift up and down thing and then the one rainfall up top and then the roll in sink. So it's a tiny little sink so you can roll into it. But everything's bigger.

I had a terrace. I had a terrace in the next one. TV too. It was good. What were you going to say though? I was going to ask how much bigger

because New York, the hotel bathrooms are tiny. How much bigger really is a handicap bathroom? It was. Like the normal one we would see here. Yeah, like... It's like an American bathroom.

Yeah. It's like over here in America. The wheelchairs are the same size. My surprise there, they're like, ah, no wheelchairs, scrunches. Scrunches. Con sucker. Wheelchairs got to stay in the lobby.

New York is so small While we were driving to the airport It's hard not to just look around And just have so many questions That city There's so many Indianapolis is literally one block of that city That is possibly 45,000 blocks The amount of humans

We went through Chinatown last night And our driver, Adeel that is possibly 45,000 blocks. The amount of humans. We went through Chinatown last night, and our driver, Adil, was from Morocco, which I guessed correctly the first time in 10 years, by the way. He said somebody guessed correctly. I said, well, I'm a world traveler. And Sam was like, culture, do you mean? I was like, you get it. And Adil was like, you funny.

And I was like, yeah. So he looked like Spanish, though. So he looked like Spanish, but the name Adil, I didn't think it was a Spanish name. So I said, Morocco, because literally it's the only country that I've ever been to over there and I know. And he was like, he stopped the car and did a full turnaround. He was like, how'd you know?

Have you had bananas? Yeah, he lost his mind. He lost his Morocco bananas. I thought Morocco was a different country. They had the peanuts. Oil. The oil. The oil.

Argon nuts. That's what it was. The argon nuts. You thought it was what? The bananas. Bananas. You're confusing

the other banana. You're confusing this. The Clinton, the thing down in St. Wherever you want to make it. Lusia.

Lusia. St. Lusia. That's what it was. He's just getting his stories out. Big banana island. The embargo, is that what it's called? Lucia. Lucia. St. Lucia. That's one of us. He's just getting his stories. Big Banana Island. The Embargo, is that what it's called?

Embargo? Yeah. Because the Clintons were in bed with Chiquita. I knew it the whole time. I was like, it's fucking Hillbillies

fucking made a monopoly of bananas. I want you up too. Apparently, there was some farmer down in St. Lucia that got completely fucked over. I learned that.

I do. Zito does this. He talks to the Uber driver. I don't know how people don't. I'm going to be honest. I don't know how people don't. You have to get to know them because they literally have your life

in their hands. I don't even think about that. I don't even think about that. Let them focus on the road then. That is something. That is something. That is something to think about. But I don don't i just want to know about this place like i want to know i could be lied to by all these uber drivers but these motherfuckers might as well be

gospel whenever they tell me a fact i'm going straight to a tv show the next day dropping that information i've done that on numerous occasions where an uber driver tells me a fact i'm like yep i'm not even googling that I'm going all the way in. Adele said that with some real confidence and just I'm shooting from the hip with it. And then people that are listening, now that's what they believe. Because it's not a fact that you would just...

Like Clinton's in bed with the Chiquitas. We have no idea if that's true. And I'm sure there's no way to ever find out if that's actually true. But I was told that by an Uber driver in St. lucia that this farmer who's his uncle got fucked over and i'm like well why would they make up this big of a story what did the deal tell you what's that did he give you any facts no not really he told you china took over little italy oh yeah yeah so he said la guardia he did the 2022. I'm thinking he said 2030.

It was very funny. He said somehow it's $2.8 billion renovation. $2.8 billion. The Denver one was $2.8. Yeah, but why don't they just go build another one? He can't. That's why. Because you can't. There's no room.

You literally can't. So they have to add on to that. It's terrible. Yeah, but we're driving through Chinatown. And he locked the windows. And he made a point of locking the windows. By this point, we're probably seven to 10 minutes

in the conversation. So we know each other. Adil knows me. Adil knows Sam. We know each other. And he does this like dramatic, like lock of the windows. And I was like,

oh, what'd you do there? And he's like, lock the windows. And I was like, why? He was like, Triads. Chinatown.

Yakuza. This place smells like shit. I was like, why? He was like, they're diet terrible. Fish, garbage. He said, I learned one too many times. And I was like, I didn't even want to know what possibly happened to a deal in Chinatown for him to learn his lesson. But it was just outrageous.

And then six minutes later, we're where the people from the Titanic, people from the fucking Titanic boarded America. I'm like, where the fuck am I? This place is insane. I love Chinatown, man. Dude. I got a nice fake Breitling watch there one time.

Fake Burberry scarf. See, I tried. I forget who I was with. I was with one of my old teammates. I think it was one of my old teammates from New York. I don't know if it was college or when I was there. I forget. It was in that area.

It was early NFL or late college. We go to New York, and the dream was to go to Chinatown and get, obviously, some knockoff shit. We couldn't get into anything. So my friend turns, looks at me, black guy and goes, man, you look like such a fucking cop. The Chinese

folks won't even sell us their fake shit. Look at you. And then we just had to walk away. And we just walked out. So I've never experienced that. I've heard it before. I went for it one time. And I never got it. Because it's like a back room, right?

They take you down the hall. There's like different alleys and shit. One time I was there with my family. And my mom wanted a fake purse. And they literally put her in a van and fucking took her to a place. Oh, my god. Yeah. That's what I wanted.

I wanted that, Todd. That's literally the plot taken. Yeah, but in Chinatown, you just trust them. That's what they do. There's documentaries about this shit. There's documentaries about it. They take you into these back alleys where these back roads, and then they open a garage.

You get in there, and there's just like all the fake bags that you could possibly imagine. It's this huge warehouse. Yeah, I was trying to get in there. They won't take dudes. Because I don't know if they're worried. I think they might be worried about the cop thing. I think they sold to me because I was hammered.

They're like, if you're pretty drunk. This guy's going to spend a lot of money. He's a stupid fucking Italian. He wants all the Gucci shit we got. Correct. I didn't get in. But I want to one day. I want to one day.

Is the food fucking amazing in there? Or is it just a bunch of pig heads and shit? No, that's why it smells. You get the Mushu. I learned that from Jackie Chan in that movie. Campbell's up in the Mushu. Just for future reference, I do not believe anybody seeks Chinatown for dining.

I don't think it's a go-to. It's like a marketplace. It's like Anthony Bourdain would go there. Okay, the people who like to eat terrible shit are going to Chinatown. We stay there all the time. And I couldn't fuck a monkey off a hook. I couldn't find anything to eat after like 2 a.m. Yeah, we stay there all the time.

Everything's shut down. I don't know how we always end up there, but. You stay in Chinatown? Oh, yeah. The one time we stayed right across the bridge at one point. Yeah, it was real cheap because it smells. A deal. One too many times. One too many times.

One too many times. We also had a bathroom that had no tub, really. The water just flowed out and the light didn't work in the bathroom. So it was a real adventure. It's the best city in the world.

They're lighting the light, the thing up tonight. The tree. Christmas tree. Yeah, well, last night, I guess. Sam was all excited we were going to be there for the Rockefeller. The lighting of the tree tree so that's like the so we were going through

she watched sex in the city this morning while i was packing while we were in the city hi i'm miranda i don't know what their names are but yeah she she was like a real basic white girl fucking move and i came around and i said i was like oh this is the most basic thing she's like i've never done before and then right downstairs there downstairs, there's a Sarah Jessica Parker shoe store. So there's another basic thing. We stopped by, looked there. And then the basic things of New York City, the New Year's Eve and Rockefeller Tree, I think,

are the only two that I haven't done, that Sam hasn't done. And they look like nightmares. The New Year's Eve is... It looks like a nightmare. You've got to be out of your mind to do that. It's all Taurus. So if you're going there, I mean, you've got to expect shoulder to shoulder a lot of the same stuff.

Watch a ball drop. It's underwhelming. Is it Ninja playing this year? Yeah, Ninja is actually playing video games there. He's playing Fortnite. Yeah, he's playing Fortnite. This fucking guy. Ninja has weaseled his way into the goddamn New Year

Dropping the ball I saw kids are going to rehab for Fortnite Oh yeah They're going to have to start opening up schools for Fortnite Because it's taking over the education I want to do the SantaCon SantaCon's one New York thing that I want to do Oh yeah where they go to all the bars

Everyone dresses like Santa There's a lot of Mrs. Claus's running around Oh yeah What's that? Everyone dresses like Santa. Apparently everyone is just fucking hampered. There's a lot of Mrs. Clauses running around. Oh, yeah. Oh, oh, oh. Looking to... What's that? Naughty or nice or something. Hey, good tie in there, Diggs.

Oh, Santa Claus 2 was on last night. It's the season. You guys can watch Santa Claus and the Grinch. You'll not feel bad about it. I'm very excited about it. I saw the Grinch. Yeah, dude. Went to the new one about it. I'm very excited about it. I saw the Grinch. Yeah, I did. I went to the new one last night.

Good? It wasn't bad, but they didn't need to make it. The music sucked. I hated it. Pharrell, what's going on, cuzzy? He was the narrator, and he was good. Oh, I thought he made the music. He might have.

I mean, who knows what he did, but it was a lot of Tyler the Creator stuff. It's just like, I don't know. I just don't want to hear fucking rap music when I'm watching the grinch tyler creator is dating jayden allegedly that's what they say jayden says jayden smith oh well yes yes jayden father will our father warren lord in heaven who whart Wharton? That'll be the name. Men in Black. Of course. Kingdom Come. There will be done.

On Earth. Indefinitely in heaven. After Earth. Terrible fucking movie. Who was that? Who was in it? Will and Jaden. Never would have guessed. Oh, I thought you were talking about the one with Chris Rock

where he comes down as the fat white billionaire. Oh, so good. Oh, that is so good. Down to Earth. Down to Earth. Yeah, that's a good movie dmx bro i caught that i caught that on like a sunday or something at like 3 p.m one day like in the off season just was on randomly and i'm like what the fuck is this and chris rock is just acting

ridiculous the funny thing the whole plot of the movie he just wants to play the apollo that's literally the whole plot steve harvey brought the apollo back what was that the apollo was just a really hard place to play? Yeah, I guess. Used to be. Probably not now. You know what I mean? Showtime with the Apollo used to be on after something every day.

Yeah, but why was it, though? I can't remember what show it was. Why the Apollo, I think, is known for being very difficult. I don't think it was known for white comedians. I don't think that's what I thought it was about. No. There was only three white comedians or something in their prime that got to do it, I think. No, but it was a place for black comedians.

Like Tennessee, your country's guard, you go to Grand Ole Opry. You're a black comic. You go play the Apollo, right? Yeah. It was like a big honor to get to play the Apollo. So if you're a white guy that plays, they're a huge honor. Huge. Yeah.

I think if I keep wearing gold chains on Sunday, you'll make it. My gold Air Force 1s. That'll play. Those Air Force 1s I had to do that for Jalen. Jalen shot them out. I knew he would. He said great shoes.

He was wearing some. Red? Were they red? Yeah. Greeny was wearing Louis Vuitton red bottoms. I respect. Okay. Greeny.

And he walked off the stage, and I thought he was flexing a little bit because he lifted up high it was like a heel lift I think he was just walking and I was like oh a little bit of a flex on the red bottoms and Damien Woody was like what's that

he was like Greeny you flex and Greeny turned around and I was like are those red bottoms he was like it's all I wear and everybody just started dying laughing. I fucking love that. Everybody started dying. He was really cool today.

In between the shit, it was really cool. It was awesome. They were really nice over there. He dropped it for the brand today. He did. Not for the brand. Blew my mind. Yeah, it was good.

Blew my mind right there. By the way, I don't want to pick between Patrick Mahomes and Deshaun Watson. No. You asked us that this morning. I was like, I don't know, man. That's a tough question. Because I got asked that in the thing, and I sent a group a text. I was like, okay, why do we pick Patrick Mahomes over Deshaun Watson?

The only thing I can come up with is St. Patrick's Day. Very good, though. Zito said he's entertaining for kids, I believe was his reason. Yeah, that's all he said. What a good leader. I said, but a good leader. I said but a good leader. In the locker room. I think he likes Deshaun Watson a lot.

I think he likes him a lot. I think we all should. I think so, too. He's really good, man. Yeah, and their O-line's terrible, too. So they get one or two guys up there, they're going to be dangerous. They've rattled eight off now. That throwaway game with the Colts earlier,

whenever the Colts went for it on fourth and short and overtime and wanted so we're not playing for a tie correct at the end of the season i think that tie is going to come but i would like it to be known that without that decision is the team on the momentum that they're on because they trust their coach as much and have a you know what i mean mentally it's good spins i like that mentally is the team as good as they are if Frank doesn't decide to go for the win there in the whole team rally behind him? I don't think so. I think they're going to get in.

They just have to catch the Ravens, and the Ravens are starting a running back at quarterback, so they should be fine. They are. Hey, they're calling that game. But he was throwing some dimes, too. Yeah, he also throws a lot of bad ones. I didn't see those.

I only saw the highlights. Very Ipso facto. That didn't make sense. Don't know why I said that. Yeah, Ipso if this, then this. Yep, I know make sense. Don't know why I said that. Yeah, ipso if this, then this. Yep. I know. I knew it as soon as I said it.

Yeah, yeah. You said it properly, though. Because some people like Zito would say, if so facto. Oh, yeah, yeah. And he would have no idea that you said it the wrong way. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What do you mean? It's ipso facto.

That a boy. But they look like they're going to be in good shape. Joe Flacco's gone. Charm City hoodie. I haven't got his newsletter recently. Did you see? He was wearing a Charm City hoodie. Oh, yeah, yeah.

With his fucking comb over. With the suave weave. Yo, the Ravens set up Joe Flacco to look bad on the sideline. Making him wear that Charm City fucking hoodie like that. They set him up. His whole newsletter, I signed up for it just to see what it was. It became the Justin Tucker newsletter. It literally switched over.

Yeah, because Tuck started... Are you being serious right now? No, I'm being 100%. Same company, I guess. Oh, okay. You were signed up to Joe Flacco's newsletter? Yeah, yeah. He said you're not going to not.

That's what Zito said. Yeah, you got to see what's going on. Where did you find this information?'s newsletter? Yeah, yeah. He said you're not going to not. That's what Zito said. Yeah, you got to see what's going on. Where did you find this information? The newsletter? I'd just like it to be known that his brother, fucking Fred Flacco, lost this week in the Duquesne Dukes. Yeah, it was not in the newsletter. Great day to be a Duke.

I saw you tweet about the fucking Duquesne Dukes. I was wondering what was going on. First round of the playoffs, then we're going to head to South Dakota. And that's all they give a fuck about. Buses? No, no, they're flying. Oh, Dukes. The Dukes fly anywhere over like a six-hour bus ride.

Ivy League. Good for you. Almost. Almost Ivy League. Hey, we got budget. Hey, it's D1, baby. We don't take buses everywhere. Almost.

What were we talking about? Fred Flacco, the Ravens. Oh, yeah. Justin Tucker's got a whole little thing. He had a Cyber Monday sale that just ended yesterday. I saw it on his shit His IG I was like, hey, Tuck

I like what you're doing here Do you like Boz's pass? Touchdown pass? I loved it What a strike Respect that snap, by the way Yeah, it's tough to snap like that Without giving it away, too

Because even just a little bit of a turn of the hands The football players in the NFL are so smart They see things like that Those are little things that professional football players in the nfl are so smart smart they they like see things like that those are like little things that professional football players notice is like if somebody's offset a yard or somebody's just a little bit inside the numbers or outside numbers or a little bit closer to the line or they're a little bit cockeyed like nfl players notice that so all that little shit does matter incredible snap right the boss and then right to an american hero composure are you kidding me

with a fucking laser that was a chest that was for the brand on every level i know couldn't do a video though i don't know why why couldn't i i don't know were you at home with shitty internet yes i think that's probably where it was i was probably traveling back to the house phil's kids fucking he got me sick i think oh no kids do but it could be it could be New York already because every single time I go there I

get sick I'm allergic to fucking kids I think could be there was a goddamn kid on a plane that's the worst

cry wow it's like what's wrong with this thing I think plane should have a kid section I just

not terrible what like underneath it's like a little I think planes should have a kid's section. I just... Not terrible. Like underneath? With the luggage? Like just a big glass, and you just keep them behind the glass. Like a cage-dent pin? Like a play place? Like a daycare for an airplane? I'd like to do a similar thing to you.

We need a Zito place? Let me out, guys! A play place on a plane would be a good idea. This kid, by the way, had great lungs, this little fucking kid. He's going to be Phelps. Might be a fish. That kid might be a fish for how long he was yelling. These lungs were never ending.

Good news. Zito has said that he's going to get deodorant for his feet. Finally. Yep. I looked into it. They have an anti-perceptive. You know the good thing about perception? They've been on fire lately.

Well, you know the good anti-perspirant, perspirant, anti-perspirant for perspiring? The good thing is putting that on is, I'm sure, much easier than just putting on socks. So I'm sure you'll really stick to this. Do you have them on today? There was an article I read where it was, socks don't do much.

My feet get too hot. Yeah, but you sweat in your shoe. And then your ragged ass shoe never gets washed. You just bought those shoes and you put your dirty fucking stanky feet in them with no socks. He was wearing those slippers earlier. I want you to know this. This is a real thing. I'm very lucky.

My feet don't smell when they sweat. I go barefoot a lot of the time. For a lot of period of my life, I was barefoot, like legitimate. I'm very lucky that you did not get that. You know, it's not your fault, though. Like, I got very lucky that my feet just... Whichever one you choose to believe in, whether it's the Cuban God, whether it's any...

Fidel Castro. Fuck you, Castro. Your feet just stink whenever they sweat. I have a fix. Socks. That's the last one. So it's like a band-aid.

I understand what you're saying. The socks are just a band-aid. We're trying to just cut the head off. We don't want to just put earmuffs on it. Go with the deodorant and then put a sock on over top of it. How do we put a lot of band-aid. We're trying to just cut the head off. Here's an idea. We don't want to just put earmuffs on it. Go with the deodorant and then put a sock on over top of it. How do we put a lot of band-aid on it? Double up on there. Double wrap.

If you go deodorant on the shoe, too. No, no. So they said baking soda. You put baking soda in your shoes. God damn. It's like your fucking shoes are a whole refrigerator. We used to do that during football camp and stuff. We would put baby powder and shit on our shoes.

Yeah, so they said every time you apply, you put this stuff on, you throw some baby powder, and then at the end of the night, you put baking soda. But you know why your shoes need it? Because your shoes are getting sweaty. You have three different accents. You have three different accents in there. Like, the shoes don't stink until they get sweaty and then they dry.

It's not normal for shoes just to smell terrible. Is it possible to say they come stinky? See, yeah, that's what I'm thinking. You think it's normal? Yeah. That's just in your world. Yeah. It's not normal for your shoes to ruin the smell of an entire room.

Right. This is an intervention. I like it, guys. It's not the first one either. Zito, you're a special individual. Thank you. Zito, thoughts're a special individual. Thank you. Zito thoughts have been catching up a little bit. Yeah.

Getting better. Who's running? Is it somebody in here? No. Do you have a pub cat? Is it pub cat two? None of those are us. None of those are us.

We were talking about this earlier today. We would like to make it known to all of our fans that any of the parody accounts, not one of us run those. They're all our name. If they say something wrong, that's not us. They do seem like Zito runs them all. They very much seem that way, but he does not. See, I think people know that it's none of us, I think.

I didn't know. The pub one responds to everyone like there's one of us. Yeah, they're speaking for us a little bit. We appreciate it. I love that we have an account. I love it. I don't even tweet for my account usually. Oh, my God.

So these people are putting words into the pub's mouth. They are. Big disclaimer. Disclaimer. The pub heartland. Well, because Gumpy said, hey, I had a great trip. And then the pub account was like, we loved having you. Yes.

So it seems like, sounded like. It's the actual pub, though. It's the house. Yeah. That's what they're doing. They're talking as the house. They're talking as the house. Yeah.

They're not talking as you humans. They're talking as the home. That should be in the bio, then. Yes. It should be in the bio. I'm the house, not the guy. Because they also, they invited like British Will over to like cook you guys breakfast. Yeah.

Okay, so the house is off. And they went at Nick for something too. Well, the pub would do that. The house, yeah. Good point. Well, not our pink guy. It was like three weeks ago. We're past that.

We're past that. By the way, you look very healthy. Thanks. Everything seems to be going very good. Does it? Yeah. Got a haircut? We moved out of our house officially today, finally.

Thank you. We took out all the garbage out. That means he's got pink eye gum. And we were taking down the canopy, and Nick reached up, and he was like, ah! And I was like, oh, not healed yet. Still broke, huh? Can you rotate the stick? I can do a lot of things.

I just can't pick up something extremely heavy. I woke up this morning. Pain was gone. Well, do a lot of things. I just can't pick up something extremely heavy. I woke up this morning. Payton was gone. Well, it's good, though. We have him on the program. He's throwing a football again. Huh?

It's true. I can throw. He's getting the arm back. Darts. NBA three range is still a little tough, though. Do you throw darts? Does anybody use the dart putter over here? Oh, yeah.

I was throwing them big time. I got 20 tosses a day. I actually broke one of the darts. Just put on two pairs, yeah. I was throwing them big time today. I got 20 tosses a day. I actually broke one of the dark stuff. Just put on two pairs of socks. I was wondering. Let's go down to 18 dark throws and just put on two pairs of socks. Not two pairs. Just two socks.

Let's do that. I'll do that. Connor, you ride with him every morning to work, right? Yeah. Maybe you check for that before. No, no. I go window down and head out the window. We all know it doesn't start in the morning.

It's like Chinatown in Zito's car. A deal is had. While we're on the subject of Zito's hygiene, I do want a rematch of the weight loss competition. Whoa. Okay. So for those of you listening that don't know, a few months ago, we had a sponsor called Beachbody or something like that.

And Zito read terribly, but read an ad. And he said he does it every single day. And I said, oh, is that right, Zito? And he said, yeah, every day. I love it. And then Diggs was like, I need to lose weight. And we forced it into a weight loss challenge between Zito and Diggs. For 30 days, they were to lose weight.

It was remarkable. Zito lost 33 fucking pounds and won the prize. Diggs lost 31 fucking pounds. Like, this was a real challenge. 30 days, 33 pounds and 31 pounds. By the way, they both looked incredible. They both looked incredible. Since that day, since that day, Zito

has gained 48 pounds. I would like to say, though, on the record, the grass is not greener on the other side. He is plus 15 pounds from the beginning of the weight loss challenge. He said, he walked up to me

and said, I'm up 15. I was like, what does that even mean? He's like, from before the weight loss challenge. He walked up to me and said, I'm up 15. I was like, what does that even mean? He's like, from before the weight loss challenge. That's two months you've gained 48 pounds. I think I've put 25 back. Is there any rules changes for this one or is it same rules? I think it was a pretty good little fair

33-31. I think it was pretty good. Zito, we started as Zito gained two pounds. I know. Day one, he gained two pounds. I was told last time I should argue for percentage, which he still would have beat me last time by like 0.1 of a percent. No, no, no.

It was like 4.6. 4.6. That doesn't make sense. I tried. He has a lot more to lose. Currently. Than he ever has Currently Than he ever has Than he ever has

This is the heaviest you've ever been I don't want to body shame you But 40 pounds I heard rumblings that there might be another weight loss challenge And I You bulked it up I will say He literally said that a week ago

He did mention that He was like Thanksgiving And then Halloween Alright so you want to wait until Christmas Or what do you want to do? I think for my heart I should start Monday, but I think Christmas makes more sense. New Year's weight challenge?

So yeah, we'll do actually New Year's resolution. January 1. Yeah, January 1. Can you guys go to January? Is it 31 days in January? Yeah, I think so. So we'll go 31 days in January and I'll put a 10,000 to the biggest loser.

Yeah, that's what we'll do. Yeah, man. Well, no shit. That's good, though. I thought you needed a verbal confirmation. Can we go percentage then? No, no, no. Do you want percentage?

Because I think two pounds, 4.6%. I mean, simple. It wasn't. Greater than sign. It was not. This is me trusting the Uber driver thing, which is a stat there. No, no, no. I won percentage.

No, no. You did not win percentage. We did the math. No, no. I said I won percentage. He wants it now. By the way, in your head, if you think you're right, you should want him to win percentage because you said you won last time.

Yeah. 4.6%. Yeah. Yeah. Did I just put you in a fucking pretzel right there? What just happened? I'm trying to think of the real number. I literally just saw question marks floating around your head like Galifianakis right there.

If you have any gut sec, you'll go percentage. That goes to you too. If you have any gut sec, you go weight. That's just not fair. Percentage is fair. I like this. I won in percentage last time when I had states. Should we do a room vote?

Room vote? I don't care now. Sure, yeah, let's do it. We could definitely do it, because we've all been through one. We've all been through one of these things. Zito literally eats just a salad at noon and then doesn't eat anything else all day. It's incredible. I'm actually going to work out this time.

33 pounds in 30 days. I don't know. If we're doing percentage, anyone could get involved. Yeah. Except for you, because you weigh more than us, but you're already at a late... Hold on. I think I could probably get involved in this.

Oh, shit. Not good. Not good for you guys. I could probably jump in, too. It would be like the money ball shot. The Grinch shot? Yeah, I'm going to put up 10 grand and win it myself. That was one of the biggest asshole things I've done.

The Moneyball shot for 300. I mean, it's fair. It's fair. Okay, so what are we doing, Todd? Do you think it's percentage or pounds? I think we go percentage this time. Do you want to be in? You're old, man.

I don't know. Slow metabolism. I'm just saying, I don't think... It's after, but it's after the new year? Yeah. Yeah, but I don't think, like, as you get older, I honestly don't think you lose weight as fast as you get older. No, but he's taking the T-shot, so he's basically RH.

By the way, if I was to get in this, I would go get my testosterone tested for sure and get right up to the legal limit. By the way, something you should think about, Zito. Smoke a bunch of weed and go in there and piss real low and make your thing. What do you think, Tom? Yeah, I'll Zito. Smoke a bunch of weed and go in there and piss real low and make your thing. What do you think, Todd? Yeah, I'll go in.

All right, is it percentage? If it's percentage, it has to go percentage for me. Oh, so it's for the team. If more people want to give up, it has to be percentage. Connor, are you doing this? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I like the idea of it, but no, I don't want to be in it.

Maybe Todd trains Diggs. I'd love to train Zito. Maybe we do a little team. Todd's in it, though. You're jumping in for sure. There definitely has to be bad guys. So maybe Todd has a trainer. So everybody has a manager.

Everybody will have a manager. How do we figure out percentage? You weigh yourself. You weigh yourself. And then you take the amount of weight that you lost and divide it. Oh, okay. This is impressive. There's an actual weight loss percentage calculator website,

so don't worry. You'll be fine. All right. Yeah, I'm in. Yep. Just some math there. That's a math joke. I really like that math joke.

Okay, so I think everybody should have a manager. Okay. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. Maybe we bring the wrestling ring down here. Cut some promos. You want to be somebody's manager? Yeah, I think so.

I don't know who you want to be. The ringleader. I might want to be Zito's fucking manager. Yeah, I don't know. I would like to be Todd's, honestly. A little young gun, old gun. I think we could make it happen. You're a pretty motivating person.

I'll scream. Yeah, I'll scream in your fucking ear. I will. I think we could make it happen. You're a pretty motivating person. I'll scream. I'll scream in your fucking ear. I will. I'll fucking yell at you. I'll get that brand out and put it in your face. So I think I would like to be Zito. Can I be your manager? I appreciate it, yes.

You can. Rawls, you did good with me last time. You didn't put that sentence together. I'll ride with you. Nick's the manager I need. He doesn't say anything. Okay, so it's like a silence. I'm the type who's like,

when someone tells me to do something, I'm like, I really don't want to do it now. There's really nothing. Foxy's got nothing to lose. And Tywood is just going to lose his gut. Not his gut, like his actual stomach. I have gained like 30 pounds since I moved here. Seriously?

Yeah, I weigh like 200 pounds now. It's the most I've weighed ever. You've got like that Manny Ramirez sweats on. A Fox-Tie team would be pretty nice. No, I'm not. I don't want to lose any weight. I'm good. I just got fucking branded.

I'm good. I'll get it all on video for you guys. Yeah, here we go. Well, this show's almost over. I don't know what part of the conversation we're in. Ty, I don't know when you dropped this in. We recorded these, obviously, after the conversation happened, after I traveled from get up, 4.30 a.m. wake-up call,

a couple of delays at an airport back to Indianapolis. Here we are recording. I don't know when Ty has pieced this in, but I want to let you know, somehow, someway, Zito meant every word he just said. I don't know what he could have just said, but he meant it. And he is the dumbest human on earth. I concur.

He is. But he's made one smart decision in his life. Oh, yeah. He sleeps on a Lisa mattress. Oh, yeah. No, Gizito. Oh, yeah. My back feels good.

Yeah, with those stanky ass feet. Good ass sleep. Stanky ass feet. Good ass sleep. Viva Lizito. Viva Lizite. Zito got the Lisa mattress because he watched Ty Schmick

get the Lisa mattress. Lisa mattress is the mattress company that has completely changed the way mattress purchasing happens. It's contagious. It is contagious because once you see how easy it way mattress purchasing happens it is contagious because once you see how easy it is and how fast it is and how good the bed is you're like well i'm never going to lay back in those dirty beds that are just drug cover-ups basically for everything else i'm not doing that ever again in front of the the customer support guy who wants

to know if i would i like to see anything else? He lays in the bed with you. Yeah, yeah. Because he's doing the test on like, oh look, you can lay here, you won't even feel your significant other and then he does the old slipsy whipsy. Get away. There's probably lice on those beds too. I don't want to say that there's potentially Ebola on those beds but potentially

people are saying it. Those showroom beds? Internet saying, somebody on the internet said it at least one time. T Uh-uh. Internet saying it. Somebody on the internet said it. At least one time. Tons of disease. One time. Now Lisa says, no, no, you just go on the internet. Lisa, L-E-E-S-A dot com slash McAfee, M-C-A-F-E-E. They'll give you $150 off.

They'll ship the bed right to your front door. What a deal. You take that box, you put it in your bedroom, you unpack that box in under three minutes, probably, right, Ty? Oh, yeah. Maybe even less. And now you have the best mattress in town. Oh, yeah.

You're from a bad mattress town. You're the only one with a good mattress. It's a good place to be. It's a great place to be. I sleep on a Lisa mattress in my house. Oh, yeah, I have to. I can't wait to go get to it right now, actually. I was in a hotel bed last night. Yeah good bad mattress have inside of town yeah that entire

that entire town i think he's a bad mattress over there in new york yep yeah it's miserable that's why i'm so sad all the time because they got bad matches can't sleep well they also got soft ass pillows yeah you know my i got a big head, huge head. I stack like four or five of them things on there. Yeah, but you don't get four or five. No, you don't.

No. Especially whenever your significant other's there. Hmm. Nice guy. You only get one. They're going to take half. Two back.

I think I only had one. Yeah. I think I only had one pillow. Jeez. That's tough, man. My head, my head is so heavy it just goes right down

to the bed. I might as well be laying on a piece of plywood. Yeah. Sometimes I fold a blanket. plywood Sometimes I fold the blanket Huh? I fold the blanket to be another pillow Yeah but I use the blanket

It's crazy He doesn't just sit there and sweat all day It's an actual problem Anyways I can't wait Zito we're going to fix that problem With that weight loss challenge Have we talked about that yet on the show? It's probably coming up.

That's fine. Yeah, I think it's coming up here. Some big shit's about to take a turn. This conversation takes quite a turn. Hey, let's go, Todd. Let's go. Let's go, Todd. Let's go.

Let's go, Z. Let's go. You were going to hurrah. I was going to give that. That felt good, didn't it? Yeah, we got motivated. That's my trainee right there. Hey, that felt good, didn't it? Yeah, we got motivated. That's my trainee right there. Hey, that felt good, didn't it?

Diggs, do your thing. It felt real good. Yeah, man, let's do it. Okay, guys. Okay, guys. Let's do it, guys. Hey, that's good. I don't know.

What was my thing? I had a Diggs fit. What was my quote? Oh, my God. He had a whole life motto. Remember, we're going to do like, he's going to be a motivational speaker. Oh, he's going to get a website. Something about quitting. I'll figure it do like he's going to be a motivational speaker. Oh, he's going to get a website. Something about quitting.

I'll figure it out. It's okay to quit. Anyways. Yeah, yeah. It's okay to quit your bed mattress. L-E-E-S-A dot com slash McAfee. M-C-A-F-E-E. Get $150 off.

Give the gift of good sleep, by the way. Not a bad gift here to give somebody. Not at all. Great gift. Probably the person you're thinking about buying a gift to, they're probably sleeping Not a bad gift here to give somebody. Probably the person you're thinking about buying a gift to, they're probably sleeping on a shitty bed they don't like. And it's such a hassle to change it. You gotta go,

you gotta do this, you gotta do that. Lisa just ships it right to the door. Bing, bang, boom. You're welcome. You're a hero. Because you're delivering dreams. That's exactly what I'm doing. Oh, you found your motivational quote? Yeah. Guys. This will send us back into the podcast, by the way.

If you're not getting better, you're getting worse. Okay. Wow. I think the pause before K, I think was a little longer. Well, I've been out of practice. You haven't been Tony Robbins in lately. Oh, fucking Uncle Tony. Dumbest show.

Dumbest show on the internet. Dumbest. Ty, you just grit and bear through that fucking thing. The issue was live. I don't think people thought it was that bad. And then that close-up video. Did you hear what his lady said? No.

The fourth day is the worst for the burn. Yeah, she's a burn nurse, right? Yeah, she is, yeah. She said tomorrow is not going to be pleasant. But I was taken like a lot of hard-os on the internet talking about how it wasn't big enough. I was getting people tweeting me that they would brand their... I'd brand my neck to work there.

If you're going to brand your neck, I don't want you to work there. That's what I was trying to say. Like, hey, none of us wanted to fucking do this. It's not like I was raising my hand and saying, yeah, fucking brand me. I leased the wall. The side shots of mentioning of the brand that was happening today at the ESPN is hilarious. Love that.

People getting branded at McAfee. I felt bad. I felt bad. Well, the good news is we can't do that again. We can't have that gimmick again. Nope, can't do that again. Jump off a building was the original. I was going to jump off of a building.

That was the original idea. I was pretty sold on this idea. Me too. Put one of them stunt dummy things down at the bottom. I just fucking fly off of the top, off the top rope. Probably do a swan taunt. And for the bushes. No, they put one of them big white.

Yeah, the movie things. Crash, big white... Yeah, the movie things. Yeah, the movie things. Because I do think I could go off any building in Indianapolis with one of those down there. Because there ain't a tall enough building here, I don't think. I don't know. There's a big net. But one of them suicide nets like they have in China.

Oh, you think you're going to kill yourself to get out of here? No, no. We're catching you and sending you right back to your fucking office. Thanks, you think you're going to kill yourself to get out of here? No, no. We're catching you and sending you right back to your fucking office. Thanks, Apple. Imagine people having their lunch breaks on those nets. They just jump in the net. Like it's a hammock?

Oh, the suicide net makes for a great hammock. What's going on tonight? Who's playing? Dallas Cowboys Saints. Yeah. I just don't think the Saints are stoppable right now, but the Cowboys got a lot of swag going right now. They're rolling. The defense plays well, too, at home.

I think they have a few linemen out, though, the last I heard. O-linemen or D? O. Everybody's saying they're rolling, but they're playing a team that's really rolling. Yeah. I said it today.

Everyone said they're rolling, but they beat the Redskins, the Eagles, and someone else who was like. Redskins making terrible decisions, by the way. Yeah. Yikes. Just making terrible decisions. Dan Snyder doesn't give a fuck.

Everyone knows he's a terrible human. That was just stupid. Yeah. It was so quick. For the whole NFL. Just for the entire image of the NFL. Granted, Reuben Foster, if he did it, obviously should go to jail forever. Yeah.

But. Let due process happen. Let that, just stay away from it. Like, why is the NFL like, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah, let's go ahead. Like, as soon as that happened, it was at a team hotel too. So it's even worse. It looks even worse. Yeah.

There should have been some sort of, I don't know, maybe they're on Stitch. Was that what it's called? Is it Stitch? Slack. Slack. Maybe they're on Slack or whatever, and they just send out a little message into the group, the NFL, like, hey, nobody pick up Reuben Foster whenever he gets cut here because that happened at an NFL hotel.

Sounds pretty bad. Probably not for us. Just one little message in the email chain. They had to have an email newsletter. Like they did to Kaepernick. Yes. Exactly. Exactly.

It's like you've been saying. They just had Alex Smith break his leg into like 400 pieces, and they go out and sign Mark Sanchez instead of Kaepernick, but then turn around and sign Reuben Foster. It makes no sense. You're literally shooting yourself in the toe. Isn't that what Jason Witten said? You're just shooting yourself.

Yeah, the best tweet I saw about this was if Colin Kaepernick didn't kneel for the flag and beat a woman, he'd still be playing in the NFL. It's pretty close there. It's wild. Aside from, what did you say, Ray Rice? Aside from Ray Rice, I can't think of many domestic abuse guys. Hardy.

Hardy. He got a shot, though. Yeah. And then he chose to just do it professionally instead of... Hey, he's winning, huh? Those fights, too. They're sending him in there

with a bunch of bums. Yeah, but he is very, very violent and very scary. Very. And he looks like he's enjoying it. I've just seen him on...

It's like standard death shots on the internet of him fighting people. Some fat white guy. He's fighting like a fucking gator back there. Bailey, you didn't deserve that. But the guy did look like you, the last guy he fought.

How about Kaepernick's boy, Eric Reid? He's been with the team seven weeks. He's been pissed at six times randomly. Yeah, if they got you, I happen to fall into that gotcha somehow, some way. Everybody's like, these just aren't random. These aren't random. No. No shit.

No shit. What is it? I read an article, 10 players each week on a team, and he's been picked six times. Yeah. I mean, it's a joke amongst the players that it's not random. We know it's not random. And I've said this.

I have stand-up about it not being random. I mean, it's just a. And I've said this. I have a stand-up bit about it not being random. I mean, I've entirely. It's just. It is a funny little thing, though. But the people that take a stand, like, they say it's random. It's not. The NFL is the worst place. It's like, okay.

Get the fuck out of here. They make bad decisions, though. Yeah. That's a bad decision. Terrible decision. Bad one. Their name's a bad decision? Yeah.

Dan Snyder doesn't give a fuck about anything. What does he do? How did he get the team? I know he's loaded. I have no idea from what. Today, Jalen Rose said something about the Lakers, the buses, not being billionaires like everybody else. Really?

I was sitting off the camera. All they have to do is sell the Lakers and they're billionaires that's what I was thinking but he was like he mentioned how LeBron was brought in to sell tickets and make them good and stuff like that because the buses aren't billionaires like the

Paul Allen the Clippers I forget his name Steve Ballmer he mentioned some other names. And I was like, the owners of the Lakers aren't billionaires? That seems wild to me. Very wild.

Because L.A. is the home of billionaires, I feel like. And that team is probably, I don't know, I would guess behind the Knicks, probably the most valuable team that you could buy. In the NBA, it's a top three NBA franchise for sure. You're with your Boston slant saying Celtics, but you probably are, though. Celtics and Lakers are. I mean, they have the two most championships in the NBA. They've been the best for the longest.

Huge markets. Huge markets in LA. So why did Jalen say that? I wonder. Maybe they are. They have to be. I mean, same guy who said Zion couldn't beat play on the Fab Five. I didn't bring that up to him, but if there was a chance, I was bringing it up.

Yeah. I was bringing it up. I wanted them to ask me one of those questions who I thought the most athletic human on earth was, and I was going to say Zion. Mount Zion. 6'8", 280, just looking down at a 10-foot fucking rim. Who can jump that? Nobody.

Nobody can do what he's doing with his body. He's a young LeBron, but he's even more explosive than LeBron was somehow. And way bigger. If you look at LeBron when he came into the NBA, he wasn't that big. He's 280. That's a left tackle in the NFL. He's Anthony

Costanzo. Fucking jumping over little white kids. Windmill dunk. Fucking A. He's the most athletic human walking. Probably. It's incredible. Jerry Buss, worth $600 million. Yeah, see?

There it is. And Jeannie Buss is only worth $20 million. So the Knicks. So Jalen Rose is real. The Knicks are top of the list at 3.6 bill. The Lakers are 3.3 bill. Warriors, 3 bill. Do the Knicks own Madison Square Garden?

2.5. I doubt it. The Dolans. No, I think the 3 bill, and then Bulls. Do the Knicks own Madison Square Garden? Bulls 2.5. I doubt it. The Dolan. No, I think the Dolans do. I believe so. Who's Dolan? The owner of the Knicks. So he owns Madison Square Garden?

He owns the MSG Network for sure. So that is probably a large part of that fucking evaluation, by the way. That property in the middle of Manhattan, right? Isn't it right in the middle of Manhattan? Yes. And they have two blocks that's probably a billion dollars right there yeah i mean there's also a train station underneath msg so i don't know if that they also have rights over that or anything so let's just

say they shut down the shop you know let's say they shut down the nicks and they just decide to be real estate people they're already estate people, they're already winning. They're already billions and billions of dollars. If the Bustos decide to sell the Lakers, they immediately become billionaires. Yes, but it is crazy to think that they only got $600 million because they've owned it for a long time. Maybe they have majority

ownership, but there's multiple multiple owners. That's how the Steelers are. The Roonies are billionaires. They got it on horse money, didn't they? Horse money? Gambling. Gambling, right? That's how the Roonies got the money. The Steelers owner got money on gambling, basically.

I respect them. Betting on the ponies. What's it called whenever you go to another country? The Rooney rule? Ambassador. You're an ambassador to another country where you don't get arrested. Rest in peace. You become an ambassador. Yeah, you get diplomatic immunity.

You can do whatever you want. I did the one before. That was Dan. Rest in peace. Where'd he go? Probably to Irish Heaven. Oh, Dan Rooney. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He was the ambassador? Yeah, yeah. How do you become an ambassador? You just got to donate, right? I don't know. Friends with the president. Yeah, he probably knows everybody. So I got to be friends with the president and I can become an ambassador? You just got to donate, right? I don't know. Friends with the president. Yeah, he probably knows everybody. So I got to be friends with the president

and I can become the ambassador to Ireland? Yep. Yeah. That would be a pretty good little time. I wonder who the ambassador to Ireland is right now. Probably just put a nice little 80 million into the campaign fund of somebody. Oh, you're saying money just makes things happen?

That's weird. What's that? The money thing. Oh, yeah. So when Jalen said that, it was very surprising to me because I thought NBA teams were worth a lot more than NFL teams. Yeah, I'm shocked, actually. Because NBA gets so much more exposure.

They get fucking 80 games. Worldwide, too. Arena. They go where? Yeah, everything. China, Mexico, London. Everything. I thought NBA owners, because there's less.

No, there's the same amount. 32 teams? 30, I think, London. Everything. I thought NBA owners, because there's less. No, there's the same amount. 32 teams? 30, I think, yeah. But there's less players, so you have to pay less people. There's more games. There's more tickets. Everything's more. And I just assume that NBA teams are raking fucking money in.

Honestly, that's surprising to me, the bus thing. Are the Lakers going to be good, by the way? Maybe they're just not doing so great. They're hitting their stride a little bit right now. But LeBron, it's all LeBron again. It's just like what it was last season with the Cavaliers. It's just LeBron and then everybody else. Overusage.

Jalen said it. Overusage. They're worried that in the playoffs, whenever you need somebody else to make a play, the other person's never had to make a play all year, so it's not going to happen. A lot of people think they're going to get Bradley Beal, which would be a really good fit there. That was on get up this morning. Yeah, it was never

about this year. It really wasn't. It wasn't because there's a bunch of big free agents who are going to be available this offseason. Kevin Durant. Anthony Davis is the guy who's going to go to L.A. and then it's over. Clay Thompson. Anthony Davis in New Orleans? Yeah, he's going to go to L.A. Hey, shout out Sean Kelly.

He's the play-by-play guy down there. Yeah, he is. Oh, yeah? I said, how much is it like semi-pro? And he said, it used to be like that very much. They like ride travel with the team. That would be hilarious. But they're pretty good now.

Oh, yeah. Who, the New Orleans? For now. I mean, until next year. And then they suck again. So, Klay Thompson? I would love that. That's who I think they should get.

His dad is in the Lakers Hall of Fame. They're a ring of honor, so a lot of people think he's going to go there. He said no hometown discount either for Golden State, so that was him saying, no, no, no, I'm out of here. Are they still bad up there? Do they still hate each other?

I think, same, but I think they've started to turn it around again, too. They've won three in a row. But they hate each other. Yeah, for sure. Draymond and KD are not getting along. Was that too much success? I think they're just worried.

I think they're scared of not having KD. So they're trying to be like, yo, you better stay. You better stay. You better stay. And then it's kind of getting in the way of this is a win game. Oh yeah, Draymond calling a bitch will help. Yeah, exactly. But that's what he would do. You think KD,

them trying to recruit KD not to leave, is the reason why him and Draymond Green hate each other? Yeah, when he was walking on the floor when this whole kind of thing started, he said, that's why I'm fucking out of here. Because they were trying to get him to be like, hey, you're not going anywhere, man. No, I don't think he's recruiting. I think that's probably a miss. I'm just saying.

The tarantula. Oh, yeah, he's leaving for sure. I think he's. The tarantula. Oh, yeah. He's leaving for sure. I think he's leaving for sure, but I don't think it's the reason why they hate each other. I think it's the feud in the locker room. Yeah. Yeah, but you're saying the feud is because they're telling him that he has to stay. Why would you be mad at someone and be like, hey, man, we want you to stay?

Would that make you mad? Would that make you mad? No, no, no. Let's talk about why that makes you mad. No, you didn't leave. Why does somebody? Is it because of you? No. Is it because you left the team? What happened with your team? You made a queen on you mad. Is it because of you? No.

Is it because you left the team? What happened with your team? You quit on a team. Is that why? But if someone told you, you better not leave, would that not make you mad? You better not leave. Why does this make you mad, man?

Hey, hey, hey. Why would that make you mad? Hey, I'm cool, man. I'm cool, man. You better not leave. I'm cool. If they said that. Right now, you're just going back in time in your mind to justify leaving your team.

Oh, no. Please don't. Oh, really impressive. Please do not do that, Connor. What a psychological slip by you. Why don't you lay down, man? Lay down over there. Yeah.

You better not leave. Is that what you think they're saying to him? Yeah. Do you think they're delivering it like that? How are they delivering it? I think they're delivering it like, hey, Kevin. You better not leave. LeBron beat us before you got here.

So if you leave, you're a huge prick. Oh, so that. The only reason. Oh, so it's in the delivery. Yeah. The only reason you have championships is because of us. Oh. If you are saying.

But that's not what you saying, you shouldn't leave. What if it really, he just had a little tear in his eye and he was like, you better not leave! And it was more like his heart was breaking. If they do say like, you better not fucking leave, I could see him getting mad at that because every time

someone says that to me on the weekends, it makes me a little angry inside and then it makes me want to leave. Irish goodbye, see you later. little angry inside. And then it makes me want to leave. Irish goodbye. See you later. Really? I don't think that's it. I thought it all stemmed from at the start of this slide, KD had an open look to win a game

and Draymond took the shot instead. So then that's when Draymond could have told him that we won without you. And then he's like, why didn't you give me the rock? And he was like, because you're a bitch. Then he was like, okay, I'm

fucking leaving. Then you think that's when they were like, you better not leave. Too late, man. I hope I'm fucking out of here. Are you kidding me? That's like every day they're on the bus, ELE, everybody left, everybody. Steve Kerr's yelling that. Nine more hours to go.

That's what's going on? That's exactly what happened. Okay, we got the NBA season figured out. Next year, the LA Lakers will be comprised of LeBron James, Kevin Durant, Klay Thompson, Steph Curry, Anthony Davis. Probably Kawhi, too. Not a bad team. Probably Kawhi Leonard.

And Russell Westbrook will sneak in there. Sometime. If he wants. And then it will just be Draymond Green and the Cavaliers and Steve Kerr. It will Leonard. Yep. And Russell Westbrook will sneak in there. Sometime. If he wants. And then it'll just be Draymond Green and the Cavaliers and Steve Kerr. It'll be Draymond Green. Hey, how do you feel if you're one of LeBron's boys from his last two stops and he doesn't ask you to come to LA? That's like, fuck.

A lot of FOMO. I literally got fired. Fucking JR just tried quitting when that happened. We realized. That's what happened to him. Yeah, he stopped showing up to the Cavaliers facility. Caleb had no shot. Well, he's hurt, so.

What happened? What happened to J.R. Smith? He stopped showing up. J.R. Smith and the Cavaliers have like a mutual agreement that he doesn't have to show up anymore because they're just going to train him because he doesn't want to play there. That is so funny.

Classic J.R. fashion. He didn't realize LeBron wasn't on the team until like the start of the season. Wait, wait, wait. LeBron's gone? Who team until the start of the season. Wait, wait, wait. LeBron's gone? Who am I playing with? Kevin Love. No, JR.

Kevin's hurt. Just Kyle Korver? Okay. Did he get traded today? No, no, no. I don't think so. I don't think yet. Not yet.

Who? Why are you shaking your head yes like you did? Where did he get traded to? I thought I saw it on the TV when I was walking by. They were saying Philly. J.R. Smith to Philly? No, Kyle Korver for Markel Fultz, the dude they just drafted first overall. You can't shoot a free throw.

Yeah. He does do the double clutch free throw. He's still doing that? Yes. Well, he got the yips? No, actually he changed it to he goes up on his right and he throws it back to his left, back to his right, back to his left. And then when he gets to the top, he just throws it with one hand. Right now, an hour ago, the rumor was Marco Foltz for JR and Cora.

Does it go in? No. What? Does it go in? He's so bad. He's playing with the ball as he goes up. What does he do? Granny shot.

He should. I don't know. He should just stop playing. It's bad. Is he bad at basketball? He's bad at basketball. He was so good to a college. Lonzo Ball, who was the two-pick in that draft,

he's also probably going to get traded from the Lakers. He's terrible. Where's Mark Calfa? Washington. And he was really good? Yeah. Just one and done. I guess.

No, he was. But he wasn't Ben Simmons at Washington. Well, no shit. Nobody is. Well, Ben He wasn't good. But he wasn't like he wasn't Ben Simmons at Washington. Well no shit nobody is. Well Ben Simmons wasn't great at LSU. I'm just saying

Marco Fulci was like pretty average. Kemba? Yeah. Kemba's playing out of his mind right now. He's leading the NBA in scoring.

See that's me doing basketball scouting. I just mentioned the only guy that I remember he's leading the NBA in scoring. Of course he is.

Chuck Villanueva? Chuck Villanueva? Of course he is. Of course. Who wins? The Saints win tonight? Yeah. Of course.

Go ahead and lock that in. Cheat codes. Saint Cheat Codes. Dallas Cheat Codes. Oh, yeah. Dallas Cheat Codes. And the Saints. And the Saints.

Listen, Dallas fans. We think your business is good. We think the future mayShow.com. And the Saints. And the Saints. Like, listen, Dallas fans. We think your business is good. We think the future may be bright. Yep. We think all good things for you. We like Jerry. But you're walking in Drew Brees, man. This is Drew Brees.

What if they win, though? What if the Dallas Cowboys win? It'll completely change my mind. It'll be unbearable, the Cowboy fan reaction. It'll be unbearable. It'll be awesome. Let's not get it wrong. They deserve to have a little bit of happiness.

They are a loyal fan base that doesn't have a lot of happy moments in recent history. So they would deserve it, but it would be grotesque. They are an angry bunch. There's a reason. I put out an obviously sarcastic tweet that Colt McCoy, that you should sign Jordan Shipley because Colt was starting and guaranteed Redskins win by a million. When Dallas won, I got a lot of like, they are an angry bunch, man.

There's a reason they've been around for so long. America's team for one point. There's Cowboys fans everywhere. Thanksgiving too. I probably didn't hope. No There's Cowboys fans everywhere. Thanksgiving, too. I probably didn't hope. No, no. It was Thanksgiving. Also, you draft a rookie quarterback.

He goes 13-3, and then his next two years are terrible. It's kind of tough. Yeah. From a fan base. If they win this game, though, it's going to be everything. ESPN, it'll be everything. They'll win the division for sure. The Cowboys?

Yeah, for sure. I bet on the Eagles the other night. They got a big win for me the other day. They're back, I think. Ertz is back. Ertz has like 90 catches already. Feed the fucking Ertz. Feed the fucking Ertz.

He's unbelievable. You guys, they just couldn't get it together, huh? It's tough. Whenever we lost the Super Bowl, it was tough. It was tough. Whenever you win the Super Bowl, I imagine it being very difficult, too. Just like Conor McGregor, this motherfucker. You got $100 million in the bank account.

It's going to be hard to wake up at 4 a.m. and go roll. It's like me this morning for get up. I barely wanted to do that. It's tough to do that. But if they get hot, they're a team that can get going. I'm excited for the rest of the NFL season. Me, too. LA Rams, how are they going to do?

They're going to do good. I'm excited for the AFC side of the playoffs because last year, there were teams that were in there like the Titans and even the Chiefs. The Chiefs, yeah. That didn't worry you, but from one to six this year, I think anyone on the AFC could win the AFC. Well, with the Chargers at eight and three, the top five seeds are all going to be pretty good.

They're going to be good teams. Chargers, by the way. Chargers are getting screwed by the Chiefs. No home team. They have no home games. Correct. Nope. The LA Chargers have zero home games.

Yeah. And they just play good football. Uh-huh. We don't talk about them. No. TV doesn't talk about them. I had some guys tweet me the other day. They said, I know we don't have any fans, but if you make a Chargers cheat code, I'll

buy 1,000 of them. It's just like the Clippers. It's a Clippers-Lakers scenario. Why talk about 8-3 when you have 10-1? Hey, let's do this ESPN commercial, or question. Is Phillip Rivers the reason that the Chargers have no fans? Is he not likable enough? If he was my quarterback, I'd fucking love him.

Me too. He talks shit. He slings the him. Me too. He talks shit. He slings the rock. He plays. He wins. He's got 4,000 kids. He's funny in interviews. But there's just no fans.

It's like, why is there no fans? Talk about a guy opposite of Andrew Luck who shows emotion when he throws an interception. That dude is red in the face throwing his helmet. Not just when he throws an interception. Anything bad happens on that team. Those kickers missing kicks. Oh, my. He stands and watches every extra point.

Like, I scored that touchdown. Don't fuck this up. Him and Cutler used to have that feud. He'd just go out there and talk shit to Cutler at midfield. It was amazing. I'm a big Phillip Rivers guy. He's a grab the lineman by the face mask guy. So if he was a Chicago Bears quarterback.

That'd be so much better. Chicago would love him, though. I think Chicago would love him. Like New York City would love him. I think he's more of a New York guy. New England would love him. I think it's anywhere but California. Pittsburgh would love Philip Rivers.

Just anywhere but where he is. California does not like that. You know, he's only there because fucking Eli, right? Because Eli, Archie, I, is the real answer here. Archie pulling the strings. Way to go to that wasteland. Oh, oh, oh. There's a Woj bomb.

The Cavs are sending veteran sharpshooter Kyle Korver to the Utah Jazz. Oh, so not for who? Alec Burks and two second-round picks. Huge. When he starts to miss, he misses. He'll go three games straight with not even hitting a single shot. Super straight. I wonder if he hits in practice in between those games.

I wonder if he misses in games, misses in practice, misses in game, or if it's miss in game, hit in practice, go back into the next game thinking I'm going to fire up makes. Miss again, miss again. He seems like the dude who does not miss in practice. I think so, too. Yeah, I feel like it's stadiums for him. Depending on where they're playing and what night.

Perception? Yeah. He plays well in certain places and in others not. Oh, because the perception of it. That's like whenever we were shooting at fucking Venice Beach and there's nothing behind you except for homeless bum seats. It's like, yo, it's hard to get a little depth perception there. It is.

Outdoors is a different animal. He's like, what's the name from UCLA with the headband? Drawing a blank on his name. Someone help me out. Headband, UCLA. White dude. Never mind. Ryan Leaf?

Yep, exactly. Plays with the Pacers now, actually. Who is it? I don't know. Ryan Leaf. In college right now? He's talking about basketball. Pacers, what the hell are you talking about? That's what I meant. Pacers, that's what I meant. know. Ryan Leaf. In college right now? He's talking about basketball. Pacers.

What the hell are you talking about? That's what I meant. Pacers. That's what I meant. Yeah, Ryan Leaf played quarterback. What are you talking about? This is a Peyton Manning-Ryan Leaf. No, no.

There's also a Ryan Leaf who plays for the Indiana Pacers right now. Let's go. I like this. You put money on it right now? I think you're talking about TJ Leaf. Fuck! I knew it was Leaf. Hey, those Chargers quarterbacks.

I could have got some money out of that for you, Ty. Phillip Rivers, TJ Leaf, Ryan Leaf, you know what I mean. Jason Capone. A lot of things. Oh, I was going to guess that. I've never heard of that human. Really? Never, not once.

He was awesome back in the day. People will agree. Will they, though? I'll get two. Hashtag end game. Hashtag end game. Hashtag end game. Do you have any fucking idea what Diggs is talking about? Jason Capone.

From myself at Diggs, at Tom McComas, at Nick Morado, at Viola Zito, at Boston Conner with no O in the Boston. On the second part of the Conner. It's Boston. I might have to do C-O-N-R. I think that might be. It's very simple to explain to people. So it's just do C-O-N-R. I think that might be. It's very simple to explain to people. Yeah, so it's just Boston C-O-N-N-R.

Very simple. So simple. Yeah, it's good brand. It's almost as good as Ty's brand. The whole reaction is like us being like The slow-mo video where you can hear it go in and it's like a cattle prodder. That's at Ty Schmidt. Follow him.

At Evan Foxy. Gator, what's yours? At Bailey McComas. He got up on that mic, man. Kept it easy. He got really up on that mic, didn't he? Good for him because some people speak off the mic. You can't hear him.

You have to do the what? Yeah. What'd you say? What? Tequila. What? you say? Y'all say what? What? Tequila. What?

Barbecues and beer. What? More vodka. What? More tequila. What? More beer. What?

Another beer. What? More beer. What? Stupid. All right. Yep. Heartland Radio 2.0 tomorrow, Friday Bangers.

Always funny stuff. You guys are putting out heater episodes. I'm enjoying them a lot. And I hope you guys have an incredible weekend. Damien Woody, who's going to be scheduled to be on the show at some point, is supposed to come on today. Kid's birthday, though, he found out. Oh, yeah. I'm joking.

I'm joking. That sounds like a shot. I didn't mean it that way. It was just jokes. Just jokes. Lamar Odom also potentially coming on. Nice. I don't know.

I don't know how it's going to go. I'm dealing with one of his guys. So it's kind of an interesting. Green texters. Yikes. Dude, I have no idea what to do. Every time he texts me, I think I'm getting hacked. I'm like, I can't.

But I'm excited for that conversation with Lamar. That should be fun. He's coming up at some point. I don't know who else. We'll have a good time with it. Have an incredible weekend. Ty Schmidt, hit the music. By the way, burning ring of fire.

Whatever some people. That was good. You did good there. What are you going to play this time? I don't know. We'll see. Oh, Ty Schmidt. Hops in the booth.

The DJ Nick Moroto booth. see. Oh, Ty Schmidt. Hops in the booth, the DJ Nick Marotto booth. No, we're cool. All right. I need a dollar, dollar, dollar. That's what I need. Well, I need a dollar, dollar, dollar, that's what I need Well I need a dollar, dollar, dollar, that's what I need Said I need a dollar, dollar, dollar, that's what I need And if I share with you my story, would you share your dollar with me?

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