The Pat McAfee Show - PMS 2.0 081 - Bonging Lord Stanley's Cup

Episode Date: June 13, 2019

On today's show, Center for the Arizona Cardinals, and good friend of the show, AQ Shipley joins Pat and the guys to discuss game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals, and the new Stanley Cup Champion St. Louis Blues. They also cover his time so far in OTA's and what his relationship with Kyler Murray is like, and they discuss whether or not there has ever been a botched surgery by team doctors from any sport. AQ also recounts his relationship with Ben Roethlisberger as the guys discuss his recent performance in OTA's for the Steelers (6:02-49:41). Jon Gruden and Lou Holtz also join the show to talk about things happening around the NFL, Nick gives a heartwarming ode to the NHL season, the guys discuss how Zito's hair is starting to fade despite the theory that most people of Cuban descent have great hair, they chat NBA contracts and look ahead to see where certain guys will be signing and give a few quick predictions about tonight's NBA Finals game, Pat talks about his experiences without an agent trying to secure his own contract, and Pat previews a couple of guests who will be coming on the show next week. It's a good one, come and laugh with us, cheers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For streaming, creating, gaming, and more, power your passions for less during Dell's exceptional cyber savings event. Enjoy up to $400 off stunning laptops like the XPS, along with high-performance desktops and next-level Alienware systems, redefining what's possible with 10th Gen Intel Core processors. Shop special prices on top-brand electronics and. Plus, enjoy free shipping on everything. Don't forget to ask for Intel when you call 1-800-BUY-DELL. That's 1-800-BUY-DELL. It is June 13th, 2019. And I'll tell you what.

The weather has completely turned. The trees are blossoming. The leaves are looking very leafy. It's a beautiful time to be alive. We're about two weeks before it's too hot. We're about two weeks before it's, I'm sick of this heat. I can't wait for the fall.

I can't wait for the fall because football is around the corner, which we are all excited about and we get into an incredible conversation about later. We talk about the big Ben Roethlisberger. We got inside details about the number one pick in the NFL draft, Kyler Murray. We

also cover everything that happened in last night's Stanley Cup, Game 7 throttling of the Boston Bruins by the St. Louis Blues with the entire crew from That's Hockey Talk podcast. Today's show is an electric one. And today's show is an electric one. And today's show is brought to you by our presenting sponsor, Seeky.

Yes. Did you guys know it was Seeky? Yeah, I had an idea. Had a hunch. Did you really? I was hoping. I didn't know, but I was hoping. You know why I could tell you were hoping? Because I saw Todd mouth into the microphone.

Please say the presenting sponsor is the greatest ticket buying app on planet Earth. And you even said, and... The moon. Don't want to derail the show. We got a great conversation coming for you. This is only supposed to be a minute long ad read. That's all they paid for up front. But I need to talk about something.

My theory about aliens living inside the moon and inside of planets is coming true. I just want that to be known. I don't talk often, but when I do, normally right. Anyways. There's aliens inside the moon. There has to be. I'm 100% on board with that.

They're finding shit on the moon that's just coming out of nowhere. And we didn't go there, so it's not like we put it up there. No. This got brought up earlier. There's a political... Yeah, wait. We don't need to get in there. We went there, but we didn't litter. If you're going to get a ticket to the moon, by the way, you get it through SeatGeek.

Correct. We're still in a SeatGeek ad right now. Don't you ever do what you just did to Buzz Aldrin. Actually, we did litter. They were just hitting golf balls. There's so much shit up there. There's a rover there. Play the quick 18. The shit that we didn't leave there, there's new. There's so much shit up there. They left a rover there. Moon garbage. Play the quick 18. Please.

The shit that we didn't leave there, there's new shit that's just popping up out there. Yep, that's what I'm interested in. The new shit. The new shit is coming from the aliens on the inside of the moon. I just would like that to be known.

I just would like that to be known. Know it is. We talked earlier before we came on the air about a political situation. Joe Biden, I guess, cured cancer. I don't know how that even got brought up. We talked earlier before we came on the air about a political situation. Joe Biden, I guess, cured cancer. I don't know how that even got brought up. We didn't even dive into it.

And Jeff Gorman, who wasn't here the last election, was like, have you ever talked politics in here? And I said, oh, yeah, we broke the biggest news on election night, actually. Literally broke the biggest news on election night about fucking Mexico Joe Donnelly. Yeah. Sleeping Joe. Sleeping Joe. Acapulco Joe. biggest news on election night about fucking mexico joe donnelly yeah sleeping joe sleeping joe acapulco no shot no chance we broke that news four months early that that was happening just like the aliens inside the moon news i've been talking about this for months

you're welcome whenever it comes across cnn or whatever news you watch and it says aliens found inside of mars or inside the moon know that we have been talking about that since day one and those aliens that live inside the moon they use the greatest ticket buying platform on planet earth and that's sea geek right now you use promo code pat you get ten dollars off your first order use promo code mcafee get twenty dollars off your first. Let's have a little self-awareness and know that if we're not rich yet, not rich yet, we use the McAfee for $20 off. And if we are already doing pretty good, okay, we're in between holidays here.

Father's Day is coming up, so something to think about. Maybe get tickets to the ball game for the old man. Use promo code Pat. $10 off your first order. They have tickets to everything, comedy, theater, sports, you name it. The NHL is over, so no longer tickets to any hockey games unless maybe you're gonna go to russia or something like that but everything else that you need tickets to sea kick has them for their greatest prices because they scan the other ticket buying platforms and make sure you're the most bang for your buck shout out sea kick let's get in this conversation there's aliens in the

moon it has to be definitely that's actually happening What do they wear? They probably got a seamstress up there A lot of tunnels Space suits Might be hollow Who knows? You don't know They probably look like miners

Oh you think so? Like the Chilean miners Or West Virginia miners? Chileans Oh come on They definitely wear flashlights on their heads. I think they look like giant penises. I think they look in the dark. They have those big

cat eyes. Oh, like Vin Diesel? I don't like those aliens. As I've gotten older, my night vision has gotten worse. Yeah, that happens. My dad had to start wearing glasses because of that. It's called cataracts.

Look at you working with me. You got to eat more carrots. I'm pretty proud of you. Get your rods and cones up. Turn the light off. It takes me a lot longer to adapt to my surroundings. I used to be a ninja. That thing goes off. Nothing bugged me. Yeah, you're 30 now.

What about driving at night? I'm good. What did you say, you, Gorman? I wear shooting goggles when I drive at night. Zito? Not all the time. Gorman does? Yeah, at night.

If I'm going like 30... I thought you laughed strictly because Zito said something under the... You laughed because you thought of yourself wearing shooting goggles while driving. I got them in the car. They're great. You're the old guy that gets caught by the infomercials You laugh because you thought of yourself wearing shooting goggles while driving. I got them in the car. They're great. Those fucking yellow tits. So you're the old guy that gets caught by the infomercials at night. No, it's not one of those big.

Yeah, tactical ones. The tactical ones. No, but it looks like a pair of Ray-Bans, but yellow. And it brings a glare like way better. Those are the tactical sunglasses. There's no shame in that. It happens, man. It's natural.

Dude, it's Ray-Nex for your eyes. It is. We talk about Ray-Nex later in the show, actually. It's a shame that it happens, man. It's natural. Dude, it's Rain-X for your eyes. It is. We talk about Rain-X later in the show, actually. It's a call forward. It's a call forward. Let's get to the show, man. Look at that podcast studio you got over there. Fucking right.

Ladies and gentlemen. That's the line of the night. Fucking right. Let's go. Dude, so many live fucks on tv joining us now he's a man who's a center in the nfl he's been there for over a decade he was a remington trophy award winner in college for the greatest center in all of college football he's a western pennsylvania hall of famer for his accolades on the basketball court

he's a round man he's got short arms he's white he's white trash ladies and gentlemen he just walked out of the room had to turn the air conditioner on it was making too much noise had to turn it off he meant coming in very hot ladies and gentlemen alan quay sweaty ship i'm gonna be soaking wet by the end of this fucking interview let's go oh you're just getting interviewed this whole time is that what this is you're getting interviewed about 20 minutes let's keep this thing short, all right? Okay, we are recording this after the St. Louis Blues just won a Stanley Cup for the first time ever, I believe. The first time ever.

Gloria is playing all over Missouri and all over basically anybody on Earth that hates the Patriots, hates Boston. I feel like those are kind of coming one in the same. Synonymous. Yeah, because Phil Maynes back here was cheering so hard for the Blues. I've never seen him cheer for anybody other than the Penguins our entire life. The Blues ran up the score unsportsmanlike in the seventh game of the Stanley Cup.

AQ, host of That's Hockey hockey talk along with the other couple boys what did you think of game seven i loved every second of it i didn't even see the first period i come home i'm like two nothing let's fucking go here we go what happened where were you at i minicamp i just i know the priorities are all mixed up these days but i didn't think i rushed home to get home to see the greatest spectacle in sports, game seven of the Stanley Cup. I come home to a 2-0 lead for the boys, who I'm rooting for, and then I start getting tweets, leaky, leaky.

Oh, here we go. I called that he would be leaky. I'm just putting it out there right now for the world to hear. I called it, and it came up when it mattered most. Talking about Tuga Rask, the goalie. You have staked claim to the word leaky? Yeah, I did. If he would be leaky at some point in this playoffs,

he wasn't leaky at all for the first 20 fucking games of this playoffs. But guess what? He got leaky. It got leaky. It was awesome to watch. Hockey is the greatest sport in playoffs. It is so fucking good. It's so fast.

I like to talk about the nimbility of the NHL players. I've been on record saying that if any of those players any of them any any single one maybe not the monster guys like char i don't think maybe not him but you get it maybe not the goons guys that fight maybe not the dumb dumbs that are out there just doing stupid things but any other a hockey player that is a professional even over there in vladimir putin's town they could all be olympic gold medalist fucking figure skaters and then you get in there flying around with 100 mile an hour slap shots clap bombs next door neighbor clap bombs which is my move i am so impressed by the athleticism out there and the refs they do the damn thing as well yeah i mean that's why that's

exactly why i fell in love with this sport. I feel like they're much more athletic on skates than any of us are on just with our shoes on. And the speed at which they play. And then also my favorite thing is I cannot wait to see the injury report as soon as the team gets eliminated from the playoffs. It's my favorite thing ever. Oh, this guy played through a broken – what the the fuck do you mean he played through a broken leg? Yeah, because they're allowed to lie. It's just a lower body injury, right?

They're encouraged to lie. Frank Morado drank some 12-year-old scotch while watching this Game 7. Ty Schmidt showed up after taking a nap because he knew this was going to be a long one. Went directly into the 12-year-old scotch. What's that, AQ? AQ's sweating in Arizona. During the intermission there, I asked Frank to please write something up to summarize the 2019 NHL season that has come to an incredible ending,

by the way. The St. Louis Blues winning in Boston is an incredible ending. Nick has something to say. If we get some reading music for old Frank Morales over here, that'd be great. Like, listen, here's the deal. All right? We got a lot of shit coming down the pipe right now.

A lot of things coming down the pipe. It's... Pike or pipe? Could be both. Yeah. I don't know. For me, it's... What is it for you?

Coming down the river, maybe. What is it for you? I don't know what you're saying. Well, I was literally saying pipe the entire time. Yeah, and I think the correct one is pike, but it doesn't make any fucking sense. So I say pipe every second. I think it's PVC pipe, too. Oh, like a turnpike?

No, like a PVC pipe. I don't know why it's fucking... Well, that's what you're saying. You're saying what we're saying. I think it's technically pike. Yeah, I know. But Where did pike come from? It's like a turnpike. No, I'm saying from Pennsylvania.

376, bro. VA turnpike. Coming down the pipeline, though. That's what I see. And I think about if I have a big old shit that's coming down a pipe, it's going to clog that thing and that pipe can't handle it. Get the plunger. Coming out of your pipes and into those pipes.

Or like in the Flintstones, the human one, where they have the food little dinosaur that's underneath. Garbage disposal. Garbage disposal guy. It's coming to the pipe. It's too much for him. That's what I feel right now with opportunities. A lot of them.

I'm drowning in opportunities right now. I'm not letting this go. Just let me get this pike or pipe thing. Yeah, but you're 70 years old. nobody literally like do you flip off or flick off there's a question flip off yeah i think most of america flips off pittsburgh's a flick off city though yeah flick off what do i put in pike and and pipe no you don't put anything you just move on yeah just move on yeah you just that's exactly what you do you don't put anything on you do that you don't get you you know me but you don't know me this is gonna fucking drive me nuts that's on you i don't really save it for nighttime reading it is midnight right

now and we're just trying to move forward nick had a very nice prepared speech that he had alongside a 12 year age scotch wait hey killyear-age scotch. Wait, hey, Q, you're a scotch guy. Nice Macallan. Yeah, what were you drinking, Macallan? Oh, yeah. Oh, right on my alley. Kid does quite well for himself.

Yeah, it's good stuff. Puts hair on your chest. Lots of it. You shave your chest. I thought you'd be a lot hairier. He shaves his whole body. He's a fucking bat-boon. Laser hair removal

It didn't fucking work And now I proceed to shave Just like I did before I spent $2,600 on laser hair removal I had to lay down They had to tie him to a bed basically And it's You get

You get tased Your entire body just gets tased Talk about doing quite well Three grand to get the hair lasered off your body. Bro, he looked like a baboon for a while. I mean, it was a serious problem there for a while. Serious sweater vest, for sure. At all times. Oh, that Arizona heat, you know. He's in the desert, bro.

It doesn't go well. 115 here today, guys. It's dry, though. It's dry, though. It's a dry heat. They had door and OTAs? Yeah, we went inside, though. You got AC in there? Soft team. Bet against them.

They really took care of us today. I think that's smart, by the way. Keep the team happy. Keep the boys happy. Right? Agreed. I'm waiting for Nick's fucking version of One Shining Moment. So am I, buddy.

So am I. Well, we still don't know if it's a pipe or a pipe. I would like to know. I'm on it. Is Kyler Murray good at football? Yeah. I mean, he's very good at football. Like, very good. You like him as a person?

Is he a good guy? Great guy. Put his head down, came to work. Has he been cool? He wears chains outside of his jersey. I saw that.

I like it. He looks real cool, too. I mean, he's always got some cool socks on. He's got the dark visor. I mean, he's always got some cool socks on. He's got the dark visor. I mean, he's got it all going on. Way cooler than I am. Have you guys ever had a conversation? Yeah.

Yeah, we've had it. I mean, yeah. About football. He just told you, like, hey, it's on two or something like that? Is that the conversation you guys have had? Son of a bitch. It's been like, hey, what's this call mean? You know? Okay. So you guys aren't really friends yet? I can't really say

what the fucking call means. Has he gone under center at all? Yeah, because you broke news that you guys are going to need a shotgun 99%. I just feel like if you go under center, you should at least have a conversation first. We installed the annexation of Puerto Rico.

And we can roll. Hey, your coach told you and I think we're not breaking any news here. You guys are running the annexation of Puerto Rico week one, right? Isn't that something you guys have all decided? We put it in. We watched film of the little giants.

And it's on the table. Bro, it's going to get quoted tomorrow. AQ's in a world now where everything he says gets quoted, and it's magical. It just got his PR people coming after him. Left and right. I can't wait to get the screenshot sent to me. Of your bald-ass chest.

All right. Ladies and gentlemen, diehard hockey fan from pittsburgh pennsylvania a man who needs no introduction but we'll give him one he is a world champion deck hockey player how's that information for coming right down the pipe jeffrey gorman just watched him on the google figure out that he was wrong i'm not stopping when you're rolling right now and nick's been waiting patiently but i got an answer when you're ready for it. What is it? Not now. Yeah, come on. Oh, right now?

Yeah, now's the time. The sentence implies that you are standing beneath the pipe looking up. Not a good idea. The original expression, though, is coming down the pike. Pat, you said it, I think. Yes, 70 years old. It refers to coming down the turnpike with the image of something getting bigger as it moves towards us. I don't always talk, but when I do, I think. It refers to coming down the turnpike with the image of something getting bigger

as it moves towards us. I don't always talk, but when I do, I'm normally right. With that being said... How is that Kyler Murray? Yeah. Nick Moraldo summarized the 2019 NHL season with some thoughts.

If we could get some reading music, that'd be great. Congrats to the St. Louis Blues. Honestly, congrats to the St. Louis Blues. Well said. Well said to me. I wrote that out, too. With no scotch. Or weed. I'm back on the St. Louis Blues. Honestly, congrats to St. Louis Blues. Well said to me. I wrote that out too. With no scotch.

Or weed. I'm back on the wagon. Fuck. This feels good. Who's playing this? I am. I might read something. You're not. That's a blatant lie. Want me to add the percussions of my air conditioning unit? Yes, please.

Please do. Thank you, AQ. Ladies and gentlemen, host of That's Hockey Talk, Franklin Morales. The Philadelphia Flyers unveiled their new mascot, Gritty. Forgot about that. A big, clumsy, ugly pile of orange, just like the Flyers themselves.

But this monstrosity actually captured the hearts of the world. He did. I love that guy. Girl. Pretty. Undetermined. A forgettable year for the Hawks in Chicago, except for a fleeting moment when Scott Foster,

a 36-year-old accountant slash beer leaguer and father of two, enjoyed 14 minutes and seven saves worth of viral fame when he was called upon as the emergency goalie and shut out the Winnipeg Jets. That a boy, Scotty. Hey, like Tiny Danza in that fucking Garbage Man chicken movie. Just like Tiny Danza. Just came right down. Love Chicago.

Seattle was awarded a yet-to-be-named expansion team with high hopes to repeat the success of the Vegas Golden Knights, who were absolutely screwed in their second-round playoff loss on a five-minute penalty penalty call giving the San Jose Sharks an incredible come from behind victory where the Sharks scored

four goals in five minutes. That was when McAfee curse was really full swing. Four goals, five minutes. Bullshit. It is bullshit. The diehard Vegas Knights fans who've been around for years and decades almost. They didn't deserve that. No, we didn't. You didn't. The Flames

and Johnny Hockey brought some heat and more importantly hope to a cold ass winter in Calgary with one of the best seasons they've seen in years. No idea they had a team. We hope this was the last year of solitary confinement for the next one. Connor McDavid up in Edmonton and he can finally get some

help. You're damn right. The Tampa Bay Lightning went from top to bottom, start to finish, one of the greatest hockey teams ever assembled. They ran roughshod through the league from day one until round one, when they were swept by John Tortorella and the Columbus Blue Jackets, who went all in at the trade deadline. Columbus, 23rd, we're there. Good for them.

The Pittsburgh Penguins battled through a season of adversity and fell victim to a Cinderella story resurgent New York Islanders team. I fucking hate this. With a coach who can't stop twitching his eyebrows around. It's very weird. Adam Gase. Similar. But worse.

The Pens lost to that guy? The defending... AQ's doing the eyebrows right now. He kind of looks like him too, that bald head. The defending champion Washington Capitals looked like they had the horses running wild and ready to repeat, but they couldn't weather the storm in Carolina. Motherfucker, run! We're a magical turnaround with a former team

legend and first year head coach Rod Brendamore guided his team to the first playoff berth and victory in a decade. And we come to the Bruins. Did they go right down a bike for Brendamore? The Bruins of Boston flew under the radar thanks to Tampa for most of the season, but steamrolled through the playoffs with the success and execution you've come to expect of their hometown football team.

Good reading. They rallied into the finals around their captain, Big Z, playing through a broken freaking jaw. Wow. But it wasn't enough. Unbelievable play tonight, by the way. It wasn't enough. Yeah, should have been five for nothing there at one point.

The St. Louis Blues. Dead last in the league. It wasn't enough. Yeah, should have been five for nothing there at one point. The St. Louis Blues, dead last in the league in January. Losers. Dead. Called up an unheralded rookie goaltender named Jordan Bennington. Winnington, as he would come to be known. Oh! Who saved their season and guided them as road warriors into the playoffs so the team in the city

could rally around an obscure 1980s pop song and go on to capture the greatest trophy in all of sports, Lord Stanley's vaunted cup. So St. Louis, you raise the cup, and we raise our glasses, and we say thank you. We say congratulations, and we say play Gloria.

Cheers. Cheers. Stick taps, bro. I just raised a bottle of chloroseptic there. It's not good. You got to spray it in the throat. If you lose your voice. Sorry for interrupting this incredible conversation with this announcement,

but it's something that needs to be had said and heard. The father's day is right around the corner it is and a lot of people talk about moms because they're so important they're nurturing they're caring they're everything for you as a child they're nurses they're chefs they're mentors they're teachers but the dad kind of gets just shoved under a rock, doesn't he, Todd? He does. He does. He doesn't get a lot of respect, does he, Todd? No, no respect.

Even when the kid becomes an adult, the dad normally doesn't get a lot of respect. No, you just get shit on. Yeah. Every year. Normally happens when your kid's name rhymes with Willie. Oh, yeah. Especially when it rhymes with Willie. Get your dad something special this Father's Day

and show him that you're thankful for what he did nine months before you were born. Father's Day is right around the corner and 23andMe's Health and Ancestry Kit is the perfect gift. For a limited time, get $50 off a 23andMe Health and Ancestry Kit through June 17th, okay? We don't have a lot of time. We got to get this done quick.

You only got four fucking days If you buy a kit for yourself You and your dad can connect and celebrate Your shared genetic similarities And differences with over 125 personalized Genetic reports on health, traits And more

125 personalized Genetic reports, Ty That's more than 100. Mm-hmm. A lot more than 100. Yeah, quarter of a way to 200. That's a lot of reports. Are you kidding me?

That's a lot of reports. What did you say put that in the number? It said quarter of a way to 200. That's insane to think about. Mm-hmm. That's a lot of math. Discover how genes can influence well-being and lifestyle choices with insights to genetic weight. I've been saying I got heavy organs

a long time. I'm not supposed to weigh 250 pounds and look the way I look, but I do because I got heavy organs. Nope, you're dense. Yeah, I am a dense guy. That's why I don't float. That's why high school swim class was a nightmare. I wish I had 23 and me so I could have took it into that swim teacher and said, listen here with your little fucking wading in the water

situation. My body ain't built to wade. My body is built to sink like a rock, like a Houdini shit, and a toilet disappears. Stay by the wall. These are the types of things that 23andMe can introduce you to yourself and to your dad. Maybe the muscle composition of your body.

You don't know. How about the sleep quality and even more? Traits reports give insights how genetics can affect mosquito bite frequency. Hey, maybe you should have a little bit more of a heads up where you're going around a moist area.

Motion sickness. I got it. I took the 23andMe thing. It turns out I'm not supposed to be just dead tired after getting off a plane. I had no idea. I started taking the Dramamine,

which they charge $45 for at the airport. Found that out from 23andMe. Fear of heights and more. How about that? Could be a normal thing, Todd, for you to want to run out of a building whenever you're on the 15th floor. I was born with it. It's also a call for

give your dad a gift that shows you care. Wellness reports can help him make informed decisions about his health. My dad's becoming a completely keto guy after 23andMe. He learned that our body carries weight dad's becoming a completely keto guy after 23andMe thing. He learned that our body carries weight differently and to do different things. The 23andMe Health and Ancestry Kit

is the perfect gift this Father's Day. Get $50 off right now whenever you go to 23andMe.com slash PAT. That's the number 23andMe.com slash PAT. Again, that's 23andme.com slash PAT. Again, that's 23andme.com slash PAT. Offer ends June 17th. Everybody's doing this. Now's the time for you and your dad to do it.

It's an easy gift for Father's Day. It's a good gift for Father's Day. And you're going to learn more about yourself when you do it. I found out, amongst other things with the motion sickness and heavy organs and the other stuff, that I'm.09% Italian. That's completely changed my life. I had to give out a lot of apologies, but it's all for the better.

Let's get back to the show. I think the St. Louis Blues potentially lost their voice tonight screaming fuck on NBC. Fucking right. NBC didn't give a fuck about blurring out fuck. Fucking A. they want that access get the camera as close as you can to the drunk canadians who are happy with their life

they just won the stanley cup for the first time ever let's get them a mic'd up as close as possible thank you you're mic'd up every single football game aren't you yeah every single one do you think about that at all or is it just completely lost on you that somebody is listening to every word you say? Every breath you take. 97% of the things I say have to be thrown out. Have to be. Yeah, but those are. Throw it in the trash can, lit on fire.

Like, let's hope this never gets out. Yeah, but those are somewhere. Oh, yeah. Somebody hears those. They enjoy it. Those are somewhere. Just waiting for you to run for president one day and that shit's coming right out like huh did you know in week four of that 2001 season aq shipley said cocksucker well the best part the best part and you've been around it

you've seen it where like somebody's mic'd up and you say something you probably shouldn't be saying, and everybody's like, mic'd, I'm mic'd. When they're halfway through their sentence, too, it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no, no, no, no. Don't say what you're about to say about the coach. No, no, no, no. We have no idea what's going to be said. Yeah, we had a strict no mic'd up rule in the fourth down army until Matt Overton got mic'd up one night.

And the only way we found out is because during warm-ups, I saw a cameraman shooting him on the sideline. There was just a cameraman following him. And I go to Vinny, I go, is Overton getting a documentary shot about him right now? And he's like, I don't know. And I'm like, oh, that motherfucker's mic'd up. And I walk up to him, are you mic'd up?

And he goes, yeah, just for the night, man. Colts came. I'm like, oh, the worst. The Colts are doing it. That is nuts. He just needed some content for the morning snap, I'm sure. That's all. Okay, so literally there is a potential of

12,000 people that know what that means. So for those that don't know, Matt Overton started a morning motivational tweet thing called the Morning Snap. I thought it was pretty clever. AQ was a big fan. He used to retweet it daily. He used to send it to me.

But every time Overton would come to talk to us about anything, about absolutely anything, we would say fuck every other word. Like literally every other word. We'd be like, fuck, we're going fuck on fuck too fuck this next fucking time all right and then you see the cameraman just laughing in the corner and then they put out his whole entire like mic'd up thing it was just him running on the field breathing for the whole time let's go inside matt overton mic'd up it's like good job guys that was it but i would love to see what they have of you man i would absolutely love to see what they would have of you i would too there's been so many times where like you're on like a 10 play drive and i'm like can we call a fucking timeout i'm about to have a fucking heart thank you we don't have any more time let's call one anyway fucking fake an injury thank you here's a question for you i've been on a field when a guy

blew out his achilles and it just pops out of nowhere literally just out of nowhere the guy i think it was a walkthrough vick ballard popped is i think it was literally a walkthrough and he was having the year of his life like out of nowhere and it's just like going through like things vinitaria and i were at a walkthrough i have no idea what we're doing out there and everything just got real quiet and then they cut the walkthrough early i think and they're like yeah vick ballard's probably out for uh ever probably like he's probably his career's probably over with that because his skill he just popped out of nowhere not that you're anywhere near a doctor but it feels as it

sounded like a shot I am not a doctor either the Achilles though is something that you can't control right that is something you can't control it's if it's going to go it's going to go that's just the way it goes I mean that's what they say I mean they say that kind of almost about anything and it's like if it didn't happen then it's going to happen at some other point right I mean, they say that kind of almost about anything. And it's like if it didn't happen, then it's going to happen at some other point. Right. I mean, it was a week, obviously, before the whole thing. And what people don't realize about the Achilles, at least from what I've been told, is that it's literally connected to like you're in. It goes up to your calf.

It goes up to your knee. Right. So it's all these things and it's pulling everything. So if it's tight in the slightest bit, you just get that snap. Kevin Durant just had successful surgery. He said he'll be back. Easy money is what he said he'll be back. I expect him to be back by the second half of next year.

A lot of people are saying there's no chance of that happening. I think it is. He's Kevin Durant. He's about 122 pounds. He's going to have the greatest doctors surrounding him, especially if he goes to any of the big cities that he's going to. He's going to have specialists on top of specialists just working with him. Rehab on top of rehab.

And it sounds like he's ready to get back to work because he's a baller. That's what he said. He's just a hooper or something like that. That's all he does. So congrats to Kevin Durant having successful surgery. Sucks that he got hurt. I wish I would have seen him. Zito here, though, is after watching Kevin Durant blow his Achilles,

has dedicated his life now to making sure he doesn't blow his Achilles and working it out. Yeah, I'm trying to find a cure. Trying to find a cure for his Achilles. A cure for Achilles. Yes, an Achilles cure, which if you read anything about the history books, that's just not something that happens.

The Achilles is uncurable. No, I think the less stress you have on your body, I think the better off you are. Yeah, for sure. Oh, so you just lay down. Oh, I got that. You get what I'm saying. Oh, so you just lay down. Oh, I got that. You get what I'm saying? I got what you're laying down. No, he just Twitch streams for 12 hours at a time

for 18 people. That's his new thing. I need to say something here. So, has there ever been a fucking surgery that's been done where it's come out and it's like, well, today we botched the fucking thing. Is it always successful?

Like, I'm so confused at this. Well, the people doing the surgery are telling the patient that was knocked unconscious by drugs that are so powerful how the surgery went, right? Like, they're always... Like, I wish you got a video of how the whole thing went down.

So my last surgery on my knee, the doctor came to my house like skipping in with a video of how it went. Didn't he just show you what happened inside your knee? Am I correct in that? Yeah, he showed what happened inside. I'd like to see what happens on the outside. Like, oh, fuck, I just hit that vein.

Somebody do this. Hey, somebody just sneak a peek at Pat's dick there. I mean, we blew up the thing a little bit. But I would like to get a full Truman Show view of whenever they dare me me to count down from 10 right and they it's like a little game and then you're done i mean really you want to see that i from what i understand it's quite entertaining that's why my girlfriend does for a living in a surgery room every day and i have a a good ass time it wouldn't be a good ass time for you to watch if you were the one unconscious i don't think yeah but it's like any other job you to watch if you were the one unconscious, I don't think.

Yeah. But it's like any other job. You get fucking bored. You want to make each other laugh. You want to, you know what I mean? What? Look at this little thing. It's cold in here, man.

It's cold in here. 10. It's very cold in here. Please remember that. 9, 8, 7. Well, take his gown off. Let's see what he's got. I think I've seen one surgery, though,

that came into the Colts training room that was not a successful one. And it was very well known. And I won't say who. It was Pat Anger's knee. Do you remember Pat Anger's knee? It looked like a football. Do you remember?

His knee looked like. It never was the same. It never was. And it looked as if it was like they were tying shoelaces with his skin to put it back together. And it was from like his shin all the way up to his thigh. It literally looked like a football coming together. And he was just sitting on the table. And Pat Anger is a hilarious human being.

And I was rehabbing something. I walk over and I go, man, I just don't think I've ever seen a knee look like that before. I just don't know. And Pat seen a knee look like that before I just don't know and uh Pat goes that guy definitely fucked it up for sure he's just so so just matter of fact about it yeah guy definitely fucked it up uh the basketball world is changing quickly though uh the NBA has a massive game tonight shout out to the Raptors for winning the NBA championship tonight in Oracle wow So congratulations to them. I've been saying this for a long time.

I got a little bit of momentum right now. The rims in Oracle are leaky. The rims in Oracle are leaky. I've been saying this for a long time. Those exact words. I've been saying the rims in Oracle are leaky. They are... That comes out on a fucking t-shirt. I swear

to God. Winnington. Is that a t-shirt? Do on a fucking T-shirt. I swear to God. Winnington. Is that a T-shirt? Do we have that T-shirt out? Nope. That's the hockey, guys. What happened? Winnington.

As soon as you said it, the whole room went, oh. That's his nickname. Oh, so we wouldn't put that on a T-shirt. That would be dumb. Put it, guys. The MVP probably. O'Reilly was the MVP, but we all saw the game. I mean, the guy was on.

By the way, the first period that you didn't see, AQ was dominated by the Bruins. The old kick and the whole period. I read. I read. It was like 17 shots to three. I did read that. But Bennington was out of his mind.

The whole game. Yeah. He was like a guy who's, you look like all them kids down in Atlanta that we saw at the club. His eyes wide open, just gobbling up everything he could get. That one save where he did the splits and he kicked the leg out. That was incredible.

It is. It's awesome. I'm trying to learn that move. It was refreshing to see somebody with a good glove, whenever it goes high to his glove side. It was refreshing to see that. Easy, easy. Haven't seen that very much.

Just saying. What is this? An inside that's hockey talk? He's taking shots at Matt Murray right now. Yep, yep, yep. Pittsburgh Penguins that very much. Just saying. What is this? An Inside That's Hockey talk? He's taking shots at Matt Murray right now. Yep, yep, yep. Pittsburgh Penguins have been out for so long. I almost sent four hate tweets to them during this series right here. I almost sent real hate tweets.

I had to delete them. I had them up, and then I had to delete them. That were like, I'm so fucking mad at you for not being a part of this, which you normally are. I enjoy this a lot. It'd be nice to have a rooting fucking interest but instead you guys just had to suck aq's dripping he looks like he's in surgery i feel like a towel i think the oracle uh rims the rims in oracle are literally

an eighth of an inch bigger oh i'm i'm a firm believer. I think they're all bigger. Everybody gets buckets in Oracle Arena. Manhole cover. I don't know. I don't think they're that much larger. I think it's not very... Just an eighth. The fuck was that?

What just happened with the baboon? I'm dying. I think the heat's getting to me. So I think we are probably done with hockey talk man huh are you sticking around or because you told me like the wife gets home from a business trip i can't be around for too long he walked in i go i think i gotta go do a podcast she said for what i go that's hockey talk it's time you're a podcaster bro but i do i do believe that the rims are larger there and if you ever watch anybody shoot at that arena they do better the internet last night

van fleet hit 20 straight at oracle 20 straight like there were layups steph curry clay the splash brothers this whole thing involved kevin rent that's why went there. Everybody thinks that he went there to win championships and it'd be easier. No, no, he went there to get his three-point shooting percentage up because he knew the rims, half of the games, were going to be bigger than in other places. Do you think they tell him that in the free agent negotiations? No, he knows.

Oh, they just know. If I walked in there and I put out my jumper, and I'm like, you know, I'm going to shoot this one just a little bit far, like Ben Roethlisberger was doing. I'm going to shoot this one just a little bit too far, see what happens. And it falls. You're like, wait a minute. You don't have to.

You don't need anybody to tell you whenever you're a dialed in shooter. One of my favorite things Ben Roethlisberger has ever done, by the way, happened yesterday. Have you heard this? What do you do? Oh, dude. You were a teammate of Ben Roethlisberger's, right? For a little bit. Yeah.

What did he do? You think he's a, what do you think of Ben Roethlisberger as a human? He's a great guy. You get along with Ben Roethlisberger as a human? He's a great guy. You get along with Ben Roethlisberger? Yeah. Really? Hello. We say hello.

Hello. You've had more conversations with Kyler Murray or Ben Roethlisberger in the amount of time you were together? I mean, I feel like probably Kyler. Okay. All right. So this leads me to Ben Roethlisberger. Yesterday, Ben Roethlisberger, during OTAs, they had it live on the NFL Network.

We were watching it. All the quarterbacks for the Steelers were throwing the balls into the dirt. I mean, it was routes on air. They were just trying to warm up, and these balls were going everywhere. I mean, I think he hit an apartment building at one point down there on the south side of Pittsburgh with one of the throws. It was on NFL Network. They had to cut it away because it was so bad.

In the interview afterwards, Ben Roethlisberger's exact quote was, this is an incredible move. I think more people should think about doing this. I even threw some bad balls on purpose today to Deontay, the new rookie. Threw some high behind him just to see if he would catch them, and he caught every one. It was impressive. So now every throw that you see Ben Roethlisberger making in practice,

you have to question in the back of your head, is that on purpose or not? I don't know if that was on purpose. And then when it gets in the game, it's like, oh, good thing he's been practicing them shit balls because he got them all out in practice. Here they are. He's balling.

Is that not genius, AQ? You should start saying, like. Let's change positions here for a second think about this well i was thinking you give up two sacks get my fucking head beat in boom i jump the guy he swims me uh watch out throw the ball yeah yeah yeah well what happened aq after the game on this well i just wanted to see what kind of an athlete Kyler was. Well, I was thinking, yeah, that's an incredible way. Or if the guard would get your back. Yeah, I just let the guy go.

I didn't know if the guard would help me out. The left guard obviously just let me hang. And you saw Kyler get fucking murdered back there. This is something to think about. I did that on purpose. I love it. I love these OTAs and how much of bullshit they are. Oh, my God. They are such bullshit.

You don't have to say it. You're in the league. You're not allowed to say it. OTAs, if you're not they are. They are such bullshit. You don't have to say it. You're in the league. You're not allowed to say it. OTAs, if you're not a rookie, are a complete joke. There was a stern head nod from Alan Quay Shipley. Because if you're a veteran, even if you're learning a brand new offensive scheme, you've

probably played in this type of scheme somewhere, or you've learned the diction and the lingo so for you to just do six weeks of practice in the middle of nothing with nothing at the end of it and then you get a chance to go on a six-week vacation and forget all of it it's just a complete waste of time and a way for people to say that they earn their paycheck that's what i think i think it's like people saying like we pay them a lot of fucking money we need them to at least do something in the spring i mean what are we even doing here?

Am I correct in this thought? Yeah, sounds accurate. Todd, out of my control. I mean, I think it's strictly, I don't even know. It's probably not even for the team. I think it's just for the fans. So they get to trot them out and they get to see their players a little bit. Fans don't even get OTs, right?

Well, yeah, they get some videos on the internet. So this is a social media thing? Yep, I think it is. What a great spin zone for the NFL, on the internet. So this is a social media thing? Yep, I think it is. What a great spin zone for the NFL, by the way. Our yearly OTAs, strictly for social media, are beginning in a week. Get ready for trick shot challenges, terrible throws by Ben Roethlisberger, and a lot of lackluster give-a-fuck attention to detail because nobody gives a single damn about this.

Isn't it just they bring you guys in just to make sure that um at some point you don't have too much time off and to make sure that you're still in somewhat some sort of shape that's probably exactly what they do they like to monitor every case and which even though it's not mandatory like it's still held to high regard by coaches so hey it's a way to keep you there it's a way to keep you there. It's a way to get you in there. And they can still make their little comment, oh, yeah, it's voluntary, but, right? Playing time is voluntary as well.

That's a good line. Yeah, that's exactly what they'll say. Exactly. Yeah, I think it's a way just for them to monitor. I mean, I think that's the biggest thing. And then I think it becomes more about mental, but then everybody gets carried away once you get on the grass. It's like, compete, compete, compete.

We're wearing helmets and shorts. Like, what is going on right now? If I owned a stable full of world-class thoroughbreds, which you guys are. Yikes with the ownership. No, I'm just, okay. Are you kidding me? Employed. With the ownership thing?

All right, maybe. What, do you want to go to an auction at ESPN? No, maybe a just, okay. Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me with the ownership thing? All right, maybe. What, are you going to go to an auction at ESPN? No, maybe a wrong choice of words. You're going to whip them, too, make them go faster? What are you going to do, measure their hands and their feet and how tall they are and how fast they are? Wow. No.

Okay, well, it seems like you are. No, but if I've invested that money to get this team together, the offseason, everybody's out on their own. You bring them all back. You say, hey, I got all the horses in the barn here. Sorry, but it's true. Turned out they're animals. Now AQ's an animal?

No, no, no, no. Now I was an animal? The thoroughbreds. Oh, got you. The athletes. Yeah. In closing, it absolutely is to keep an eye on you guys and keep a check on you guys. Hey, AQ, get ready because one day Gorman's going to take you out back and shoot you in

the head. Yeah, well, I mean. Sounds about right. I saw Chernobyl. They just walked around killing every animal. This is Channels Television's Breaking News. Jesus fucking Christ. I was giving you a regular goddamn breaking news.

I mean, I think I like that one. Who was that? Holy hell, we have breaking news. Hiring isn't as simple as putting an ad in the paper or posting to a job board. When you're juggling hiring with everything it takes to grow your business, it's important that you reach the right candidates at the right time. That's where you want to hit that breaking news. Yeah, you bet.

LinkedIn comes in more than 610 million members visit LinkedIn every single day to make connections, learn and grow as professionals, and discover new job opportunities. In fact, LinkedIn members add 15 new skills to their profiles and apply to 35 job posts every two seconds. That sounds like a lie to me, so I'm going to reread it. It just sounds like a mind-blowing stat there. It is.

LinkedIn members, the people that are part of the linkedin community add 15 new skills to their profiles and apply to 35 job posts every two seconds that's incredible two wow two two two two like right there, when I say this, 140 job posts were applied to in that two little run we just went into. Wow. Make it 175. Wow.

That's insane to think about. Good for LinkedIn just taking over the market and helping people out whenever you need to hire a great candidate. Things like collaboration, work ethic, adaptability. LinkedIn does the legwork to match you the most qualified candidates. So you can focus on hiring the person who will

transform your business. Because you're not adding an anchor. You're adding a life float. A jet. A rocket. a moving sidewalk, a Sonic the Hedgehog booster, a float. To get $50 off your first job post, go to linkedin.com slash McAfee. Again, that's linkedin.com slash McAfee.

L-I-N-K-E-D-I-N dot com slash M-C-A-F-E-E. To get $50 off your first first job post terms and conditions do apply did you want did you like chernobyl everybody like chernobyl i thought it was quite interesting the fact that like hey we don't want these dogs to run to another country and give someone else radiation let's just walk around just shooting everything like what is happening right now like is that real tough scene just i didn't see it so I'm happy to know that that's coming when I watch it. I watched the first two scenes of that thing, and I've talked to Ty about this because Ty is a cinematography critique, I would believe, would be accurate. That's an accurate statement, right, you?

Yeah, I think so. I'm a film buff. Went to film school, that kind of stuff. I get the artsy, non-lighting thing that Game of Thrones did. I get that it makes it more intimate and it tells the story and sets the mood and makes you feel a way while you're watching it. When that guy in the hallway, upstairs I believe, was standing two inches in front of a fucking light that could have shot

his entire face or the side of his face he was deliberately standing directly out of the light and he was speaking with an english accent in russia and i couldn't understand a fucking word that was saying i turned it off immediately i am so angry at the director the producer and the actor for saying yeah you know what i don't want anybody to see anything i'm fucking doing i don't see my face even though there's a light right here i've never been more angry at something in my life well i think to a degree that show is was more artsy than like your average you know like so like certain stuff like that like that's very intentional like it's there it's there's meaning in like single shot, every single frame,

which it can be pretty over the top for someone who isn't versed in that kind of stuff. I'm pretty excited, though. That's pretty on brand for me to hate that. Yeah. Look at you. I am, right? My palate is a very basic one. If I go to one of these foodie, artsy fucking restaurants, good chance I'm walking out.

It was shot, I think, i think purposely too to make you feel like you're in 1980s russia you know what i mean it's like it's like oh let's make everybody look uglier let's not use any makeup no lighting that a thousand percent was an intention and apparently it was from everyone in russia they said it was absolutely spot on if you look at the actor portrayal and the person they're playing, it's unbelievable how similar they look. I would say that the people from Russia,

now this is quite a generalization, and I'm not sure I should say it. Please say it. Do you want to whisper it to me and I'll say it? This would be something that Diggs, this isn't't digs i feel like the russian or eastern europe they have a very distinct look you can look at a human whether they're dressed in a fucking terrible jogging outfit with a

weird pair of shoes you know church shoes and a sweatsuit yeah. Yeah. And their faces, though. I feel like they might be the most similar-looking motherfuckers on a very regular- Bad hair. They have bad hair. Bad hair. Very long faces over there. Boy, they'll leave vodka all day every day. They smell like cabbage. See, I don't know anything about their smell.

I don't get close to them, because as soon as I see them, I recognize them. You don't want to fuck with Eastern Europeans. No way. They have terrible bangs. Fuck you. Is that what they say? Pay the man his money. Wow.

Get the Oreo out, bro. Good job. We had a Ukrainian. I played a lot of poker. We had a Ukrainian transfer named Anastasia. Anastasia anastasia and i think i've seen anastasia like 4 000 times since seeing anastasia because she was a ukrainian woman and i feel like if you go to a place where there are a lot of eastern european women i've i think i actually called

one of them anastasia like i was like old high school friends with it was just a random ukrainian they all look very similar i think they honestly look all very similar just like them hockey players man a hockey player just like a fighter or a wrestler might be the easiest thing to pick out of a lineup like that motherfucker with the bent nose and no teeth yeah that guy can ice skate like a motherfucker right there yeah that ufc fighter with the cauliflower oh you know what he does? He either wrestles or is in the UFC. Yesterday on Heartland Radio, Todd had life advice. Four words of advice. Four words of advice, and it was...

Look for cauliflower ear. Yep, that was his four words. You let that guy talk all the shit he wants to talk in the bar. And no matter what size he is, he's got cauliflower ear. Don't mess with him. He'll fuck you. Run away. Yeah.

I had something going before we got into it. And he'll never get tired. Before we got into Chernobyl, I was Don't mess with him. He'll fuck you. Run away. Yeah. I had something going before. And he'll never get tired. Before we got into Chernobyl, I was going to go with something. I really had something, I thought. I lost it. It's late. It's really fucking late. You just complete.

Well, on that note, I'll see you guys. I've never seen someone look so uncomfortable for such a long period of time that you've looked this tired. I'm sweating my fucking dick off, Dave. Sorry. I'm sweating my dick off looked at this entire by the way we couldn't hear your air conditioner why don't you have the air conditioner on because it makes too much noise i made him turn it off one time because it was a it was working overtime you're making you're making nick nick is the reason why you're sitting literally in a sweatshop right now talking to us. I'm going to eat ice cream to cool the body down, I feel like.

Go say hi to your wife. We appreciate you. Have a good one, man. Hey, guys. Always a pleasure. See you later. Kyrie signed with Rock Nation, which everybody is alluding to. That means he's going to the Brooklyn Nets.

Yeah, Jay-Z, Brooklyn Nets owner, signed with Jay-Z's company. Not a conflict of interest at all. Why would you do that, by the way? I don't know why you would do that. In my head. I thought he sold his interest in the Nets. I don't know what you're saying. It was so minimal.

Yeah, I think he did. I think when he started Roc Nation. Yeah, he doesn't have that anymore. Well, because in my head, you do not want the owner's agent to be your agent. Not at all. No, because then you'll be fucked. You don't want the coach. I've heard horror stories of people that have the coach's agent like their head coach's agent is their agent right and then whenever their contract was up the agent was like nobody's

interested man just take this fucking terrible deal back here i guess we'll just have to work for another couple years and see what happens then it comes up again oh still we've been checking around ain't nobody wants you man that's crazy and the coach gets a big old fucking bonus and then a couple years later same thing and then finally the player might have smartened up and fired the agent and the next day there was eight offers on the table breaking the position record for being paid that amount i mean that is it very much a i mean i assume the the NBA is very much like the NFL. The business side of it gets very fucking nitty-gritty in there. I mean, every dollar.

Every dollar of that account got to go in my account. That's the way the owners like Gorman like to act. Yeah, those NBA dudes are making so much fucking money, though. So much money. Unbelievable. They're all making $40 million a year. Wait a minute. Didn't you do a contract without an agent? challenge yeah yeah i did pretty good i get not really i'm

making a franchise but that means i was asking for too much and they were like uh we're not gonna pay you that right i mean i hate you to be honest with the guy said to me and well maybe maybe it was that that, not the asking price. Irsay, I guess, said I wasn't allowed to leave. The story is that they weren't allowed to get rid of me due to Jim Irsay, which is a pretty awesome thing to think about, except for whenever it just becomes a toxic environment, which it could. But Kawhi Leonard gets $50 million extra a year.

$50 million extra if he stays in Canada. Yeah, so the way the NBA is set up now, there's extra incentive to stay with the team you're currently with, so they're able to offer more money to stay with your current team with a max contract versus leaving and getting less money, but still a max contract with another team. So Chandler Parsons make it 27 million a year. Yeah.

Yeah. Every year we were going through the NBA contracts the other day and there's some absurd ones, but the Chandler Parsons one is up there for one of the worst contracts in the NBA. Everybody's saying Kawhi is going to leave. I don't know why. How would you go?

How, how, how would he, how would he sense? He's going to he? It doesn't make any sense. He's going to win it tonight. He's going to win the end. Congratulations to Canada on the... By the way, Canada wins hockey.

I mean, Lord Stanley made an appearance on ice. The commissioner gave a terrible speech. Sounded just like... It was very... It's a annual tradition. He gets booed every year. Yeah, it's like Canada Christmas, though, I feel like. I feel like Game 7 of the Stanley Cup is a Canada Christmas.

Oh, yeah. The Canadian teams never win it, but they get excited. But all the players are from there or Russia. It's like Washington Super Bowl for us. Yeah, exactly. That's a massive day, I think, for Canada. And then tonight, they're going to win the NBA championship, which is awesome. You locking it?

Yeah, I just locked it up. What's up, bro? Whenever you're reading your little reading, there was times there where I remember the McAfee curse being something. Not anymore. Thing's gone. Dead. Dead.

Can we talk about this, though? Since you locked them in, they won it all. Yeah. Okay. Last year, the Raptors fired the head coach of the year. Crazy move, right? Then this guy comes in, Nick Nurse. Big Nick Energy.

Is that what it is? Yeah, Big Nick Energy. I heard that. And then they literally trade away one of their best franchise players they've ever had in franchise history for this guy that's supposed to leave after one year. It's just like the Blues. Blues

fire their coach mid-season, right? Get rid of the goalie, bring in a new goalie, win the cup. That means, hey, if you ain't moving, you're dead. That's a lot of balls out of that GM. Well, it's Mark Jackson, man. He got run out of

Golden State. Now he has to commentate every fucking day. That guy. I mean, we've talked about Mark Jackson, and he has a pretty dream scenario here. There's no pressure. He's got to talk next to Van Gundy. He's got to say his six lines. What are they, Ty? Mama, there goes

that man. Honestly, that's the only one I know that he does. This guy was a GM and now he's commentating games. No, no, no. He was the head coach of the Golden State Warriors. He was the one that couldn't get it done. And then Steve Kerr comes in and wins. And he just

automatically commentates all the primetime games. Good for you, Mark Jackson. The team you just got fired from, every primetime game. So just go ahead. You know everything about the place. Yeah. The facilities that you couldn't win in. The players. Yeah, yeah.

I mean, I'm sure he's a gentleman about it. I'm sure he's a very, very astute man about it. I bet you Golden State has given him a ring at some point. I think he could have been coaching if he wanted to, and he's just stuck in the booth. If you could be, this is like Dockage. I want to ask Dockage this question. Dan Dockage, who's a very polarizing human being.

I happen to be on the side that views every human on earth as a character in a movie. So you just take him as that, and you don't really take anything too personal. You're just like, oh, okay, that's his character in the movie of life. That's his character in a movie. So you just take them as that and you don't really get take anything too personal. You're just like, oh, like, okay, that's his character in the movie of life. That's his character in a movie of life. The Dan Dockage character in a movie of life.

I find very hilarious. I find very hilarious. I find the people that are hated by massive amounts of people and still have an incredible ego. I love them. I don't know how they do it. I love it. Dan Dockage is one of those guys. He's one of those guys, though, who could very much have a head coaching job, I think, somewhere.

And he's even talked his way potentially into a couple head coaching jobs. But I think he enjoys commentating, and I think he enjoys the radio show. And that's a real, I bet you that's a real to-do in their life. What do you want to do? Would you rather do this or would you rather do this? Would you rather take a job and just be a loser probably or would you just like talking to a microphone with no pressure?

Would you like to game plan and have to recruit all year round or would you just like to have to plan and scheme to talk to a microphone? Well, that's why Gruden stayed in the booth

until he got $100 million to pull him out of it. You think Gruden's mad that he's in there? You think Gruden's mad he said coach right now? You think he's regretting it or do you think the money is Gruden's mad that he's in there? You think Gruden's mad he said coach right now? You think he's regretting it? Or do you think the money

is just so goddamn great that he doesn't care? But he had money though. You know what I mean? He's getting seven mil a year from ESPN. Yeah, and the Fired Football Coaches of America

Association of America. Let's not undersell how much money that was making off of merch. Those visors were fucking flying. They were. Never sending them but they were flying.

How much he was getting paid to do the fucking film room. And a tire commercial, don't forget. oh yeah the quarterback coach club thing wherever he's so happy he might be a different breed though what's that he might be a different breed john he's in a league of his own i think in terms of that he's in a world of zone yeah he's just addicted to football that's i mean that's the image right i think that's probably true isn't it i mean i don't know i mean i think particularly in his case it is maybe not for everybody but i think in his case

it is it's genuine let's say they lose again if you're addicted to football you you hate losing then right let's say they lose again and then they lose again and now they're four years into this 10 year 100 million dollar deal does john gruden regret it, you think? He's the king of Vegas for a year. Not if he's fucking losing. Oh, yeah. Well, he's regretting it when he's losing or not regretting it? No, no. He said he would be the king of Vegas, and I said not if they're losing. Yeah, I think the away teams are the king of Vegas.

I think the team in Vegas is strictly so that other teams' fan bases can come down. I honestly think that's what it is. Like, oh, we're playing Vegas? We're all going to that one. I think that's what it's going to be.'re playing Vegas? We're all going to that one. I think that's what it's going to be. I don't know if there's going to be a lot of home games. I don't think he'd regret it because I think he's the guy that if he came back

and if they fired him, let's say, I think ESPN would bring him back immediately. Is he back there? Hey, Pat, in a long time, no talk, man. How you doing? Hey, Coach, I know you've been very busy in the OTAs. We're just talking about how important they are with actual NFL players. I'm sure you feel the exact same way. OTA's been going good?

Yeah, absolutely. You know, it gets a good chance to get out there, see how the guys are spinning it. Derek Carr, I'll tell you what, man, he better show me something on hard knocks. I can't stand that piss-in. I really can't, man. Gruden, you haven't been on a microphone in a while. You really had a different voice there between the two answers.

Well, you know, sometimes you got to find it. You know? Comes and goes and spurts. You know what I mean, man? Are you excited for Hard Knocks coming to beautiful Oakland, California, and get a chance to showcase an operation that you're running for $10 million a year over there? Couldn't be more excited, man.

Really? Oh, my God. You thought Rex Ryan was good on that thing? I'm going to be dropping F-bombs 50 to 60 times per 10 minutes on the show, all right? Are you going to have any guest speakers come in and kind of like win over the entertainment value? And who would they be if you had a guest speaker come in? I have been in touch with Rich Gannon i want him in there he moves the needle

everyone knows he moves the needle all right he's got the sidearm sling still which is i've been trying to get carter you know maybe equip that into his arsenal uh brad johnson you know i still love the guy i'll tell you what a cocksucker won't return my phone calls. I don't know what the deal is there. We might bring a couple guys up from the rat's nest back in Tampa. Okay. You know, just kind of instill my vision into these guys. It's going to be a good time, man. I'm telling you.

Coach, a lot of people are wondering if there's going to be any shots of you potentially burying your quarterback behind the scenes in meetings, about potentially crying last year maybe not being the quarterback that you're you're hoping he was maybe not being able to get kyler because arizona will there be any of that or will you be very aware of the cameras especially because you had monday night football around your life for so well i'll be aware of the cameras but that ain't gonna stop me from burying him. I'll tell you that much. Again, the guy's a chicken shit. I've been showing him film of Kenny Stabler.

I want someone tough out there, man, not some guy who's going to be bitching and whining and pouting every time he takes a sack. Coach, it doesn't sound like you speak like this all the time, but Derek Carr, every time we hear you in any other media thing, you love him. So I'm thankful that you open up here. Are you worried about how Antonio Brown's going to act if he doesn't get about 10, 15 touches a game?

Are you worried about managing personalities over there with AB? I actually watched a video of AB saying goodbye to his gym in Pittsburgh, and it was just a bunch of pictures of goats on the wall. And then the last one was himself. And he tapped himself on the picture. And then he walked out. It was kind of a sad moment. If we would have put, it's been a long day without you. It's been a long day without you, my friend.

And I'll tell you all about it when I see you again. I would have leaked some tears there if they would have put that behind it. Are you worried about Antonio Brown's personality out there? A little bit, but I let him know right away. I said, listen, pal, this town ain't big enough for the both of us. It's my town. You better sit your ass down and listen to me. First thing I did, I told him, listen, you got that little fucking mustache,

that blonde mustache, get rid of it. I don't want to see it. Give it some time. He's going to be throwing Derek Carr under the bus come week two or three. I'm looking forward to that, to be honest with you. So you and A.B. are going to be a little tag team duo over there. Yeah, I think so. Like I said, we got Nate Peterman still.

I like the way he can sling the pill around the yard. He throws a lot of very, very catchable balls. Most catchable ball ever thrown in the NFL. Digs scouts. He's got the all 52 or whatever it is, and he watches every rep that Nathan Peterman has ever took.

He says he throws the most catchable ball in the NFL. Is that something that you have noticed as well? Yeah, I mean, he's misunderstood, I think. You know, you get some athletes around the guy who can actually play football. Who's to say he won't throw 60, 65 touchdowns this year, man? A lot of people would, but I honestly was thinking there was a chance he was colorblind.

I was thinking there was a chance Nathan Peterman, full-on colorblind, if you guys got him checked out for that. Honestly, that's not a bad idea. We may look into that. I tell you what, I'm smacking his dick with the pool noodles. He knows when those are coming in, so I know he's not blind-blind. Not blind-blind. It's good in Oakland, though, if he's colorblind.

They see black and white anyways. That's what I'm talking about. But when he's with the Bills, I mean, blue and red are the hardest colors to see. And you've got the Patriots over there as well. I mean, you've got a big-time problem there for a potential colorblind quarterback. I think we should get him checked out. Just trying to get out of Buffalo. Well, let's not forget I'm a quarterback whisperer.

I can take guys who have typically been bags of shit and turn them into NFL MVPs. Let's keep that in mind, please. I had another question for you, but the colorblind thing really just went. My brain just started going ding-a-ling-a-ling. That might be true. What if we solve the Nathan Peterman problem with 100% just, yeah, somebody should play Uno with him, Coach.

Play Uno with Nathan Peterman and see how he does. Draw four. Yeah, you can best believe I'm going to be dropping draw fours on his ass all day long. You play Uno, Coach? From time to time. You know, it really relaxes me. You know, I like giving guys a draw four.

Maybe the wild card on there. You know, I'm a great Uno player. Do you look up to any other coaches? Is there any other coaches that you look up to that? You're like, you know what? I wish I was more like that person. No.

Okay. So we have another coach in the room that could potentially talk to you about your, your time with hard knocks. Cause this guy knows TV, I think better than you. Really? He was a doctor on television at one point.

He was a national champion. He was a head coach on television. I mean, this guy's been around the camera more than anything. Dr. Lou Holtz is joining us. Coach. Listen, it's been a long time since I've coached in this thing called football, so you're probably talking to the wrong guy.

Don't forget, I couldn't find a car at Walmart this afternoon. Hey, that's a great store. Hey, let me tell you something. You get the card there that they give you, and you flip it to them and say, hey, I'm a member. They say, here's some money off. I love it. I think that's Costco, Coach.

But, I mean, it's 100%. No wonder I got my car parked somewhere else. It's a hell of a walk there. Now, listen, that's a good football team, and Oakland Raiders are going to be a great team. And I'm going to tell you something right now. They're going up there to training camp, and it's all bells and whistles and white horses and blonde hair

because they're up in Oxnard up there, right on the Galdarne Ocean up there. And I'm just telling you. I just don't think that's where they're at. Well, they did something up there with the Cowboys. Or La Puta Vita or something like that. I don't know if it was a guy who played for me at South Bend or if it's a city in California.

Listen, I wish you the best of luck to the guy back there with the bad hair. He's a funny one. Hey, but hey, hey, hey, no,

hey, listen, no, I don't want it, hey, listen, listen,

I'm not going to say, listen to me now. This is a good football team,

don't put words in my mouth tonight. You can't sound like me anyway, so don't

even try, but listen, hey, this is a good football team, and I like him, he looks don't even try, but listen. Hey, this is a good football team, and I like him. He looks like a doll that my granddaughter has.

All right, Coach. Kind of sounds like you took a couple shots there, Coach. I wouldn't expect that from a guy Notre Dame-like, but the good Christ. I thought he was coming for my job years ago. They always had him penciled in at Notre Dame, taken over as the head coach. I got news for you, Gruden. You and your gay brother, you stay in the back row. I don't have time for you talking about whispering to quarterbacks.

Get them in the pocket, throw the football down the field, you'll have success. Always need a pass rusher, though, Coach. Always. You've got to find an edge rusher, Coach, somewhere. I'll tell you what, this Alden Smith. It's hard to find an Oakland. There's a kid named

Alden Smith he was running up. I heard he was at a tiki bar a couple nights ago. Also Khalil Mack. They had Khalil Mack there as well.

Oh, he's still there. Good player. You don't get rid of a guy like that. He's going to be good in Oakland this year. No good football coach should ever do that.

Now we do know in the NFL, coach, it's a lot different than in college. The coach is not making those decisions. There's a lot of businesses. It's not just scholarship. There's a lot of money. After signing for $100 million, Coach Gruden was on record saying that $90 million is a lot of money, man. So he was in a tough spot. Coach Gruden was in a tough spot.

Let's talk about you being in a tough spot. I saw a picture of you on the internet eating an Applebee's alone in a corner. I saw that too. I tell you what, these sons of bitches going around with their phones. Keep it in the car. Let me eat my grits in peace. Good Lord. I don't know what is going on with these kids these days, but I'll tell you

one thing. I saw a couple kids that could rush back and rush the passer while I was at that Applebee's. I almost went up, introduced myself, and dropped the card. Used to be the head football coach at the University of Notre Dame. Hey, that's a good football team. Hey, what are we talking about now, the Jets? I coached there, don't forget.

I was the big apple in the big apple. Don't forget yourself. I wore a bucket hat on my head. People thought I was about a 12 year old ball boy, but I had some fun out there. Oh, thank you, Coach, so much. Coaches, appreciate you guys. Might bring you back in here

if you can wait on the line. I saw a one-armed ball boy. I'm sorry, but I got eggs on the stove. I gotta run. This is fun. Mother, I'll be right there. I think the craziest thing about that whole thing is that Coach Lou Holtz, who is, what, 100 years old? His mom is still alive.

Yeah. That's amazing. There's a one-armed ball boy for the Kansas City Chiefs. I would like to talk to him. We have a lot of listeners in Kansas City, both Missouri and Kansas. Anybody that can link up with the Chiefs, there's a one-armed ball boy for the quarterbacks, for the Chiefs on the NFL network.

Legendary guy. Catching ball. Yeah, lefty. Catching. That one just came right down the pipe, didn't it? That just came right down the fucking pipe, didn't it? The pipe, Pat. The pipe.

I gave you the information earlier. I'm sorry. I want to apologize to his entire family. Not just his immediate family. Not just the immediate family, but his entire family. The cousins that are out west, I'm apologizing to you. The physicians up in Connecticut, I apologize to them too. It's everybody.

I covered the whole campus there. Anybody who went to school with this guy, I apologize to them, too. It's everybody. I covered the whole campus there. Anybody who went to school with this guy, I apologize. You gave him an extra buck when he was slinging papers, I apologize. Oh, geez. Oh, you had to get that arm somewhere. Whose paper out? The show's over. You guys have an incredible Thursday

man thanks to thank you for joining us we had a very large guest lined up and something

very terrible happened like that is a very serious thing T's and P's for our guest that was coming

he will be rescheduling to next week also Gordon Hayward's coming on the show next week Gordon Hayward

will be coming on the show next week. Gordon Hayward will be coming on the show next week. Speaking of bad injuries. Oh, yeah. What about being an eighth of an inch away from a national championship in the city that your school is from? What have you done for me lately? How about finding a great haircut? Finding a barber

and becoming the most handsome guy on earth? Incredible glow up for him. Quite a transformation. He is a handsome motherfucker. I would like people to tweet me questions they would like me to ask Gordon Hayward. This is a guy who went literally the picture of

back then Hoes didn't want me. Now I'm hot. Hoes all on me. Actually, I think he's married with four kids. So that's not really a good depiction, but you know what I'm saying. Good looking dad. Good looking dad he is him and that dj calvin klein dana orlovsky uh d calvin uh calvin harris harris who yeah he got very attractive orlovsky got attractive all of a sudden um old cuzzy gordon hayward though might be the biggest transformation

of guy who didn't seem to really give a single fuck if he looked good he was just a baller it at butler and in indiana then he goes to utah disappears for a while kind of goes amish it seemed like i didn't see him for a couple years then he starts getting like what was that oh he was turning butter because the amish yeah in utah yep where the mormons are excuse me i said amish though i mean that is my fault i would like you to know that I accidentally put that seed into your head. I said Amish, and the

first thing you thought of whenever I said Amish was just like, turning butter. Yeah, so loquacious. That's my new words for today. Okay, are we going to try to learn new words? Yeah, every day I'm going to try to put a new word here. You should play word association with Zito one day. What's there right now? Woof.

Woo! It's not a word association with zito one day what's there right now yep wolf rick flair would say otherwise by the way i'm super excited for zito's glup whenever whenever this sells for billions of dollars and he looks like fucking mario lopez in two years. I can't wait. The barber. The barber we asked about. Because Zito is of Cuban heritage. So Zito's family. What's that? Good pun there.

Was I playing words for hair? It was. You're 100% right. I'm so fucking good. He's of Cuban descent descent and he's from Chicago and I don't know much about the Cuban people other than incredible coffee incredible sandwiches

great dominoes, card games as well, there's a place called Little Havana in Indiana that I love I go to it, a guy's name is George, he's from Cuba his whole family runs the place, they're very hospitable, it's an awesome thing, it's all I really know about Cuba. They're passionate lovers.

Not great at missile crises. Oh, come on, Tony. Jesus. Come on. Great dancers. You want to take any shots at one arm, guys? Do you want to do that? That box has already been checked.

Again, I need to apologize unreservedly. Yeah, yeah. But I would like it to be said, Gorman's thoughts do not reflect the opinions of the entire show. Put it on your Twitter, Gorman, please. I am a fan of that guy. I saw him make some plays today. Oh, my.

Stud. Doesn't sound like it. But Zito, now this might be wrong, but most Cubans have incredible hair. Yes, they do. That is like something, right? And you do not. You have a great personality. You're very athletic. You have quick hair. Yes, they do. That is like something, right? And you do not. You have a great personality.

You're very athletic. You have quick feet. Thank you. You're an incredible gamer. Tens of people watch you play every single day. You are a hilarious human being. You're a director of morale. Thank you very much.

But the hair is just not something that has come fully together on top of your head yet. And we don't know if that's ever going to happen. Yeah, I drew a short straw on that for sure. Yeah, but it's crazy because me and Diggs were looking at Zeet's Instagram a couple weeks ago. Was that a good run? Yeah, pictures back to 2012. Zeet used to have a good head of hair. I know.

I see a GIF every once in a while of him dumping a beer on his head and then pouring it back. Every once in a while, one of the little Zito-ites will send that. It's called the Fret Riley. That thing was... You pour beer in your head and you slick it back. Well once in a while, one of the little Zitoites will send it. It's called the Fret Riley. That thing was... You pour beer in your head and you slick it back. Well, it looked incredible. You had great hair. And you say that you lost your hair because your mom used hairspray on

your head? Yeah, you know, she's put gel on my hair like at a young age, and I think it kind of stunned the hair growth. Like got to be glue? Yeah. Oh, with the two in there, right? Yeah, yeah. I remember that shit. this it's basically like hydroxy cut for your hair it's just not good there's probably a loss but it's gonna get the job it's gonna get the job done that's that's where your fault that's all it is that's my

downfall for sure but nowadays on the internet i watched a guy who had no beard at all had a bad beard bad beard bad bad bad beard they put glue on this guy's face cut out like a fake wig cut it off glued it to his face trimmed it up and it looked like Rick Ross like that

I've never seen anything like it before in my life and they said it was good for four to five days that guy what?

four to five days with showers and everything? yeah you go on a vacation somewhere what's the matter you don't shower come on Nick true

at night I shower at night everyone knows that I'm gonna shower after this. Nobody knows that. Because you play until like 1 a.m. And then you got McDonald's or Taco Bell after that. No, I can't. I can't because

Taco Bell closes at 12. It's a whole fiasco, but yeah, I don't eat at night now. But you literally just had a fucking bold-faced lie. You literally had Big Mac at 3 a.m. On Monday night. Yesterday.

I slipped. I never go to McDonald's. It's too far. Except that time. Technically, that is... Well, I guess not. Last episode. Because it's 1220 right now.

But technically, it would have been yesterday morning. In my defense, I did not eat. I only ate breakfast that day. no there's no defense to this is you said you don't do something and you literally did it less than 24 hours it's all right if you have a defense to it but yeah also no way that's true i'm kind of on the fence here i mean it's to a degree yeah yeah yeah uh but our barber said that he could give you a full head of hair. No problem. It would just, if I give him a quick 50 spot, he said he'd be able to run down a place and get Zito a full head of hair.

It happened to him once. No, no. The one barber did it with the one time. That shake. It looked incredible. They shape it up. They draw like on your face.

It's like a Carlos Boozer. LeBron, Ray, Boozer, and Zito. I mean, this thing, and it's like a dry erase board

on the fucking head. Two asphalt guys come in, they mix it up in the back, they lay it down. Looks perfect. Is it, now is it shower proof? No,

not for that. You can't get it wet at all. Well, he told me he needed to get the protective layer that he didn't put that day. you got to seal it. Yeah,

you got to seal it. Like on shoes? Like, you on shoes like that option yeah the water driplets just hit it just fall right on fucking rain x on zito's head i think we should do a photo shoot of yeah full headed z i think full haired z i think we should think about it i think it would be yeah it would crush yeah i mean i'm i look i was trying to send the guy the other day. He's like, yeah, let's go do it now because that's the way I operate. But he was like, yeah, we'll figure it out next time. He tried to charge me $100, by the way, for that. And then he brought it down to you for $50?

Yeah, he told me, I think $50, he'd go get it. Gave you the discount. Yeah, but he's got to fucking put it. He's got to Bob Ross your head, bro. Give a little respect for $50. No, I'm happy you brought the price down. Well, yeah, I'm splitting it with you. This one's for me.

That's all it is. This one's 100% for me, just to see your full-headed. I almost want to put the glue down and give him a full. Yeah, just let him go stunt for a weekend. Are we thinking like long hair? Like a curly perm looking. Whatever you want, dude. I want a perm on you.

Ladies and gentlemen, the show is coming to an end soon. We're saving our best for last. But now, a time for Zito reading. Thank you, Pat. We got your Father's Day gift. Jesus!

Coming in hot! That's on me. I like the energy. That's Day gift. Jesus. Coming in hot. That's on me. I like the energy. That's on me. I just wasn't expecting it. It's late. It's 1 a.m. That's on me.

Sorry. We got your Father's Day gift covered this year. Hold on. Is this because people have been talking about how you turned into like a sex phone operator

one of these days? Yes. Is that why you came in for the yellow? Yeah, I try to catch people off guard there. So seductive. Which one do you want?

I don't know which one. Somewhere in the middle. Hey, you? No. You do you's. These are your ad reads, not mine. Okay. Do I start from the beginning?

You can do whatever you want. I don't think I remember the first word you said. Maybe just honor the punctuation for once. It's stars. I don't know what the stars mean. Hey, you're a big time punctuation guy. Yeah. I haven't learned the stars yet.

Asterisk. Atta baby. Oh, Jesus. We got your stars yet. Asterix. Atta baby. Oh, Jesus. We got your Father's Day gift covered this year. Father's Day is right around the corner, and everyone's done. All the standard gift items. Clothes, cologne. I just think your emphasis is wrong.

It was just one sentence. There's no punctuation at all. I ran a breath. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all right. You're doing okay, man. Just keep it going. Just plow right fucking through this.

Closed cologne, a nice bottle of liquor. Done, done, done. We've got something different and much better than any of those for you. Any of those for you this Father's Day. Fuego box, a craft... Oh! Fuego Box, yeah, yep, yep. Fuego Box, a craft hot sauce store and subscription club

has put together a ton of spicy gifts options at all price points. Nice. Whether Dad is the insane hot or just... What do you want, Diggs? What do you want from me? Okay, don't let him judge you. I said that right.

What did I say wrong? You said weather dad is insane hot. Insanely hot. You're talking about Dilfs. And it says weather dad is into insane heat. I thought we were talking about the sauce. Yeah, and Phil's in the room. CFO Phil's in the room.

Foreshadow. Big time Dilf. I don't think we ever talked about it. Oh, okay. Oh, yeah. Cut. It's a call forward, huh? CFO Phil's in there foreshadow big time dilf I don't think we ever talked about it oh yeah cut it's a call forward whether dad is into insane heat

or just wants something to add some flavor to the barbecue this summer yeah okay Fuego Box has you covered

yeah they're also offering our listeners a special promo at 10% off any purchase just go to FuegoBox.com slash America that's Fobox.com slash America.

That's foigobox.com slash America, and your discount will automatically be applied. And that is foigobox.com slash America. We've been talking about this company for a long time. Especially if you're trying to get healthy and food tastes bland, Fuego Box puts together boxes of hot sauces and taste sauces that are so damn delicious

and healthy, by the way. They have low-calorie, low-carb options in there. Saved your guys' life during the weight loss challenge. Fuego Box is legit, and it shows up in a cool box. The box is multi-use. You're going to use that for

something else. It looks like a military ammo box. It's cool as shit. I like Fuego Box a lot. And also I like Hot Sauce. Because it's multiple hot sauces in the box. That was one thing that we did potentially have to correct

on Jeffrey Gorman every single time he said it. It was a box of hot Sizz. Not just one of them. I just got that. correct on Jeffrey Gorman every single time you said it. It was a box of hot sass. Yeah, not just one of them. It was a bunch of them. I just got that. Because it's an array of hot sauces. I thought it was like siss, like it's so hot. Hot sauce. You know what was so hot? Your reading. You did great. What did Phil think over there?

Phil, what did you think of the reading there? Thumbs up or thumbs down? Oh, fuck you. Come on, Phil. That was tough. I did not expect him to do that against the crowd right there. That was tough. I did not expect him to do that against the crowd right there. In your face. He just gladiated me. Flagobox.com slash hot sauce.

Shit. America. America. He had to pull the paper back out. That's tough. Let's get back. I got a perm one time. It wasn't good.

What does a perm mean? Just curly? Yeah, but it literally takes it all the way down. It's tight. I had this long hair, and I was like, okay, I'm going to perm it. I'm going to get the Justin Timberlake loose. It was back when NSYNC was much better than Backstreet Boys. And I got the perm, and instead it just took my hair from being very long to about a half

an inch long. It looked like just a bunch of little springs on my fucking head. I wanted to have Charlie Murphy's hair. I respect it. I like that a lot. Charlie Murphy. From the Chappelle show. Not actually Charlie Murphy. Correct. Is he still? No, he passed away. He did. He passed away a couple years ago.

Hey, rest in peace, Charlie. Something happened with Eddie Murphy. Really? Remarried, probably. He's talking to animals. He had a kid. He had his ninth kid about not too long ago. Did he really? Ninth or twelfth kid. Everybody calls him just the coolest dude on Earth. Not his ex-wives.

No, I think his ex-wives would say he's the coolest dude on Earth. Where's he been? They did the roast of him, and everybody went up there and was like, you're the coolest guy. He's had so much money for so long. You know what I mean? Since he was like 19, he's been rich. How do we feel about those roasts, by the way? I'm starting to think about them.

Well, I think it's, you know, a lot of them don't write their own jokes. Depends on the day. So what do you do? You just show up and they give you like a thing to read? They have writers to help you. I like the idea of a roast. Yeah. But a lot of them are pretty, yeah.

More of a potluck guy. They're like, and roasts are tough anyway. It's like 10%. All right, there's a great joke. Yeah. But then 90% of them, you're like, ah. What are you, more of a potluck guy? Yeah.

Hey, Jeff Ross is pretty good, though, at roasting. That's all he does. Yeah. I mean, that's... Roastmaster General. That one where he went to prison was awesome. The one where he went to prison and watched it. I hated him, obviously, early.

I think you're supposed to hate him early. But then once you watch him work, it's just like watching a painter paint up there whenever he gets up there, especially with how terrible everybody else is, and then he gets up there just like a fucking berry face. Just fillets him, yeah. Does he do stand i don't know i honestly don't know if he did probably just the crowd work right just ruin everybody yeah that's an easy way to do he does stand up because he he does that show the the mics with um the insomniac guy david tell bumping mics yeah and they would so they would perform together And it was like more on the fly stuff.

And a buddy of mine is a comedian that said the best thing ever. He goes, they should just rename that show, Goddamn, David Tell's Way Funnier Than Jeff Ross. Jay, Jeff Ross didn't deserve it. That Insomniac show got me through a couple years of my life on Comedy Central, man. He doesn't drink anymore, right? He's completely sober. Yeah, that was a good show, though.

Great show. I loved it. I would have loved to see that if it was totally uncensored. Yeah. If it would have been on HBO or something and they just gave him free reign. Yeah, that would be a good show back in the day. That would be crazy. You ever see the old Rat Pack roast? That's what I was thinking about where they all wore tuxes up there.

Don Rickles was the king. They just took turns being like incredibly racist as Sammy Davis Jr. Well, that's what I'm saying. Don Rickles, I think if Don Rickles was around right now, he would have got just buried so quickly with the things he said. I forget what late night show host brought him in.

Somebody brought him in because he is a comedy legend and he was treated as such whenever he came on the stage. And I think he just let one fly like it was the 70s again. And everybody was just like, ah! God, I've got to stop that. I think he got dumped. I read it on the internet. But yeah, Don Rickles used to be the guy out there, right?

Dean Martin, that whole thing. It was just another. Dino. They just figured out ways to get drunk on TV and talk, right? Yes. That's all they were trying to do. What was it? Dean Martin or Frank Sinatra?

No, which one had the variety show? Dean Martin. Dean Martin's variety show. Because I thought about bringing back a variety show. I thought it would be a cool thing to do for television. If you get a good budget behind it, that could probably be a pretty sweet show that would do well right now. And once you started watching, I started watching them on youtube i think they're on it was just like oh like they

were literally just looking for ways to get drunk on television and film themselves they were that's exactly what the variety show what do you want to see i really see a pianist they do something awesome i'll get a pianist in the show penis penis yeah while smoking six yeah smoking six drinking whiskey and then they're like the best piano player on earth is just playing right there it's like all right thanks a lot man it's like uh what else do you want uh good magician all right we'll bring in the greatest magician on earth hey great fucking show man all right that was d martin did that was their entire that was a rap back thing like oh. We're cooler than you are,

and we're just going to get paid to get drunk on TV and crush it. That's what they did. I bet those guys got laid so much. Because they were the only six cool guys. You know what I mean? Sinatra's kid's getting laid because of his dad.

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm sure he could sing well. I mean, I wouldn't judge him. Maybe. Frank Sinatra Jr.? Yeah. Dead. Come on.

Show's over. I'm just... I'm not being... He is. He's dead, yeah. He died recently. Yeah. Right?

Oh, yeah. He got kidnapped when he was a kid, don't forget. Oh, I forgot about that. Frank Sinatra came out with some Bitcoin after that. He said, yeah, I'm going to F this guy up after I pay him. Italians. That's what you guys do. Even your prized gem, Frank Sinatra, is not safe from other Italians.

We leave the kids out of it. No, you don't. You took the kid. Frank Sinatra Jr. was a kid. He wasn't really a kid. He was seven, Tony. kid. Seven, Tony.

You can look at Diggs' face and just tell that he knows nothing about what he's talking about. Nothing at all. I think he was seven years old, Tony. Yeah. Alright. Show's over. Heartland Radio 2.0 is tomorrow.

It'll be a good one, I assume. Todd, are you going to have Al on? Yeah I think Al Jackson is going to come in Al Jackson is a comedian He has a nationally syndicated talk show It's on the television Podcast He has a podcast with Frank Caliendo

Who was a guest on here a couple weeks ago Good friend of mine Oh yeah Now we are friends Yeah That was the greatest thing dude sometimes you got to go through some shit before you got friends with somebody and he and i are friends uh he went al jackson if you want to look him up before tomorrow's harlem radio 2.0

went viral because his job on this talk show is be like the funny guy you know like i think bring light of it and they were talking about something and everybody was like talking around the subject he had race involved and he was the only black guy were talking about something and everybody was like talking around the subject and had race involved and he was the only black guy I think up there and he delivered like a four minute fucking like one of the most truth sermon

sermon? Yeah. Yeah. One of the most like truth sermon things and they like went to break and they were like alright we gotta go to break. It went viral

and it went huge. I met him at the Bob and Tom show. He's a good dude. I've never really hung out with him outside of that, but I've enjoyed him and seeing him go viral was pretty cool. What made you question yourself there was Truth Serum. It's so close to doing a sermon.

The serum is what I was looking for. Both work. The serum is you inject yourself with a serum and you have to tell the truth. So I was right there? You mix the two together, which is actually pretty cool. Pike or pipe, bud? It was coming right down the pipe.

That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback.

That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback.

That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback.

That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback.

That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback.

That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. That's a callback. Happened three times. Ty Schmidt, hit the music. Gloria, you're always on the run now Running after somebody You've got to get him somehow I think you've got to slow down

Before you start to blow it I think you're headed for a breakdown So be careful not to show it You really don't remember Was it something that he said All the voices in your head Calling for you All the voices in your head Calling Gloria Gloria

Don't you think you're falling If everybody wants you Why isn't anybody calling You don't have to answer Leave them hanging on the line, oh Calling Gloria Gloria, Gloria I think they got your number, Gloria

I think they got the alias, Gloria That you've been living under But you really don't remember Was it something that they said Or the voices in your head Calling for you Gloria Aha, aha, Gloria How's it gonna go down? Will you meet him on the main line?

Or will you catch him on the rebound? Will you marry for the money? Take a lover in the afternoon Feel your innocence slipping away Don't believe it's coming back soon And you really don't remember Was it something that you said? All the voices in your head

Calling Gloria Gloria I think they got your number Gloria, I think they got your alias Gloria, that you've been living under Gloria, but you really don't remember Was it something that they said? All the voices in your head Calling Gloria

Gloria Gloria Gloria Gloria Gloria Hurry up! Hurry up! Hurry up!