The Pat McAfee Show - PMS 2.0 109 - Overreaction Monday With Paul Virzi

Episode Date: September 24, 2019

On today’s show, Pat is Live from 4 World Trade Center in New York City with new friend of the show and hilarious comedian, Paul Virzi. They discuss the current climate of comedy and how things have changed since he started, and how it has gotten more difficult keeping audiences happy with the current outrage culture, how Bill Burr initially discovered him and what their relationship with each other is like, his love for the New York Giants and what he thinks of the whole Daniel Jones situation and whether or not he was excited when the Giants first drafted him. Pat and Paul also chat about how sad the whole Antonio Brown saga is, what the final straw was for Giants fans with Odell Beckham, and other things going on in the NFL on an overreaction Monday. You can check out Paul’s special “I’ll Say This,” streaming now on Comedy Central, his album “Night At The Stand,” on iTunes, and The Virzi Effect Podcast wherever podcasts are found. Today’s show is an absolute blast. Come and laugh with us, cheers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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I am currently recording these ads from the comfort of my living room. There's some cat piss around my feet. My beautiful dog Valerie laying to my right side. And the insane corgi named Chuck running laps around me. We just got off a plane from New York City. I got a chance to do Get Up this morning. Well, yesterday morning. Talked a little bit of this, a little bit of that. I always enjoy it, you know, get

to talk a little shit. Then we recorded the podcast, and then at the end of the podcast, you're going to hear a hilarious insight into my life right now that is just a non-stop circus of content. I'm having a great time with it. And today's show, just like every other podcast we put out, is brought to you by the greatest sponsor in the history of sponsors, the presenting sponsor of the Pat McAfee Show 2.0 podcast, our beautiful friends at SeatGeek. Yes, SeatGeek scans all the other ticket-buying platforms to make sure you're getting the best bang for your buck, the best tickets available for the best prices available

are available for you from our friends at SeatGeek. And right now you use promo code PAT, you get $10 off your first order. Promo code McAfee, $20 off your first order. Wow, wow. So go see a game live. For instance, you should have wanted that Tulane-Houston game last Thursday that I got a chance to call down New Orleans. There was a lot of tickets still available. They didn't fill the place up all the way, and it was electric from beginning to end. Hot as balls down New Orleans. Hot as balls.

Hot as balls down in New Orleans. Hot as balls. But it would have been a lot of fun. Theater, music, comedy, sports, you name it. SeatGeek's got the tickets for you. Use those two promo codes. We need you to do it business purposes. If we want to continue to utilize microphones in studios that are way too big,

that we should not be in, we need you to use those promo codes. And also, I need you to use those promo codes so you can live a little bit. You're alive, but are you living? Go live and experience something live with our friends at SeatGeek. Speaking of friends, I think we made a new one today. Damn slapdick in here, man. I saw you in cut-off sleeves on another podcast.

You caught me on a day I had to go on ESPN, man. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, Disney and they fucking, you know. I walked in there one day in jorts and, like, a button down. Yeah. And they let me on the air.

And then as I was walking out, like, ten people stopped me. They're like, hey, maybe next time we, blah, blah, blah. Maybe next time we, blah, blah, blah. Oh, we like what you're, but maybe next, a lot of maybe next time, maybe next time. Yeah, the maybe. Yeah. Maybe means definitely. Hey, we were talking. We were all talking back here.

We think you should put some fucking pants on the next time you come in here. Robert Iger and Disney run this place, not wherever slapdick operation you're used to. You know, what's funny is I watched, I just, watched, I just wanted to see the layout of your show, and I saw you interview Francesa, and you had like a tank top on, and I'm like, oh, dude, I'm great in a t-shirt. I'm like a t-shirt. I'm overdressed. This guy's got a tank top.

This guy cut off sleeves talking to Francesa. I thought. I know. I love Francesa, dude. He's number one. I had no idea who the hell he was. He's number one. I've been listening to him since like 03, 02. Are we recording?a, dude. He's number one. I had no idea who the hell he was. He's number one. I've been listening to him since like 03, 02.

Are we recording? Yes, sir. Okay, good. We're recording. Good. Yeah, Francesa, I had no idea who the hell he was until I just learned about him on the internet. The at back after this, the Funhouse account that tweets out, they steal the videos from

his app that he charges people for and they tweet it out. And his videos just started showing up in my timeline. I like i love this fucking guy everybody's like he's the guy that's he's the guy yeah he's he's the guy like he's right a lot and like the knock on him is like he'll cut people off it is funny though because like sometimes he can be brutal where a guy will be like you know i'll tell you something this guy at bat he's an idiot cut him off the guy didn't even say anything yet and i'm in the car going mike you something. This guy at bat, you're an idiot. Cut him off. The guy didn't even say anything yet. And I'm in the car going, Mike, you've got to let the guy finish the point. Like, if he loves the second baseman, as soon as he hears that, the guy's out.

Well, I mean, I enjoy what he did to Shermer last week. And Shermer has cut off completely any future Francesa. Did he? Yeah, he said he would never go back on because he said, okay, your team stinks. I mean, you guys are terrible. I mean, the defense is just, yeah. Joining us now, you hear his voice. Ty Schmidt is here.

Foxy and Zito are back in the control room. We're recording this live from 4 World Trade, which is still insane to me. We are 50 floors above earth just staring down at buildings. It's a pretty cool little thing if you're watching a video at home if not we're being joined by a hilarious individual a man whose first uh album came out in 2015 yes called night at the stand at the stand it was number one on itunes uh for a bit yep and then i think four on billboard i was really excited about it yeah you should have been yeah it was it was it was a lot of work traveling to get it done and it worked out great. Stand-up comedian, big-time New Yorker,

Giants fan? Yes. Through and through? Giants fan. Yeah, Giants, Yankees, Knicks. And now his special is currently streaming through Comedy Central. That's right. Bill Burr presents... Paul Verzi, I'll Say This. And ladies and gentlemen, he's saying that. Paul Verzi is here with us.

Let's go, Paul. Thank you. Thanks for having me, buddy. Your guest hosting, I'm very thankful that you came through. We've been trying to make this happen for a couple weeks now. My people have. I don't know about your people. I enjoy stand-up comedians, especially ones that are into sports. Not all stand-up comedians are into sports.

That's true. Does sports make a play in your stand-up routines? Do you reference it a lot? Early. Early a lot. Like right around probably the material I was doing right before I did Night at the Stand, I talk about sports. I used to joke about gambling on sports and all kinds of stuff like that.

But I'm a big football guy. Just everything except really, and I know people get mad when I say this, but everything but hockey. Just not hockey, man. I'm a big Penguins fan. I don't know. Yeah, but see, I have friends that are from Boston and Pittsburgh that are big. But in New York, it's like I think at the time I was coming up.

Everybody sucked. It was the Knicks. Well, actually, the Rangers won in 94, but the Knicks were like going to the finals or the Eastern Conference finals against the Bulls. You know, the Yankees started to turn a corner. And I was young, so that's what it was, you know. Well, that's why I hate baseball, though, because the Pirates, whenever I was growing up, they were in the middle of a 20-year suckfest, literally a 20-year suckfest. In Pittsburgh, the Steelers are winning and the Penguins are winning,

so that other team, if you suck, it's hard for me to really want you to do well. So I'm against baseball for that reason. Are you from Pittsburgh? Yeah. Oh, okay. I was just there. Love it. Underrated. Underrated. Under one of the most underrated cities in the United States. I'm not just saying okay. I was just there. Love it. Underrated. Underrated. One of the most underrated cities in the United States.

I'm not just saying that. I actually said that the other day. I mean, the one thing that's a little overrated, though. Easy. No, no. The Primanti's thing is like a loaf of bread with french fries in the middle of it. Like, I was... Can I say I had to shit for five... Can I say that on this one?

Oh, yeah. No, you can say shit for five days, but you cannot say what you just said about Permanis like that. I love Permanis. No, you just said it was the most overrated thing you've ever heard. I ate it at 3 o'clock in the morning. It was all bread. It was all bread, man. It was big bread and then French fries.

And while you're eating it, it's the greatest idea ever. It was like 3 o'clock in the morning. We did two shows. Everything was good. And the next day, I'm going, why did I do that? Why did I go there? Yeah, a lot of regret in that Permanis sandwich there. Yeah, but I love the morning. We did two shows. Everything was good. The next day, I'm going, why did I do that? Why did I go there? A lot of regret in that Permanee sandwich there. But I love the city. I love the

PNC Park. I think it's the nicest baseball field in Major League Baseball. Incredible field, incredible park, terrible baseball team. The thing about Pittsburgh is they like to drink. They are a work hard, play hard town. There's supposed to be a tax on alcohol they put in.

Allegheny County is the county that Pittsburgh is in. An Allegheny County alcohol tax was put in. And they expected a certain amount of money. They brought in like $7 million. And they're like, well, we got a fucking alcohol problem. And now we have a lot of money all of a sudden out of nowhere. Pittsburgh is a good town. Good people.

Really good people. Yeah, I had a great time. Good comedy. I did six hours of stand-up. I did six shows at the new improv there. Well, they renovated the improv. Yep. So they did.

And there's no heckling. It's almost to the point where I was like, you guys this good? I was waiting for one of you guys has to be drunk. Can somebody yell something? They were just into it. Great. Respectful. Thanks for coming to our city. I loved it. How long have you been doing stand-up? Professionally

for, like, 15, 16 years. Professionally I started, you know, it's hard in New York to get up a lot when you first start. You know, you have, like, no material and no clubs gonna put you on. So I was doing contests. I was doing, like, the urban circuit. Like, anywhere I can. Like, hey, let me try. You know? And then it just started to build that way. Why'd you get into it? Are you the funny like hey let me try you know and then it just started

to build that way why'd you get into it? are you the funny guy of your friends? you know what I just I was like Eddie Murphy man

Eddie Murphy as a kid 10 years old my father took me to a movie theater to see Raw and I was just locked and that's when you know

Beverly Hills Cop in 48 hours so like Eddie was like a rock star and just watching Raw how like it was like, oh, this isn't just comedy. This is just a whole thing.

And I would do Eddie Murphy impressions and people would be like, this guy could tell stories. This guy's funny. And then I just did my first open mic at 21 and it didn't go great. So I rescheduled it to have something a little more planned.

Because I thought the first time I was going to be... I didn't even have anything written. I was like, ah, let me... I'll just wing it. Ah, spitball it up, Bert. And it was terrible. Like, I was like, oh, the cigarette pack says may cause cancer.

It does cause cancer. It was like, there was no joke. It was just the dumbest shit to say. And then the next week I was, I felt bad because I was like, I could do better than that. So I said to the guy, like, he signed up for every Tuesday. And I said, sign me up for next Tuesday. And I wrote in my room all week, like six minutes, wrote it out.

And I had some friends come, and it had its own bar crowd, and it went well. And then I just started cold calling New York City clubs, being like, can I get on your new talent night? Yeah, because there's people, Gary Goldman is a guy that I've got a chance to follow along. He won't follow me back, which I appreciate and respect. I mean, he's too smart of a man to do that. But I've met him in person a few times. I've got a chance to watch him perform. And to think about how he operates, in New York, there's so many comedy places.

Guys are doing like 15 sets a week, just powering through them. Like, all right, you do one set here, you walk down the street, you do a set here at this time, then you go here, here, here. And the comedy scene in New York is a real one. You can get, yeah, like you can get up a lot. Like you can do, like the comedy cellar has three locations. So you can just literally go, like I've done one, walked around the corner, done another. And then if you've got to drive out and do something like that.

That's awesome. That is awesome. Yeah. When did you know you had something? Like a year in, you're like, you know what, I don't suck at this. I started to realize that everybody sucked at that level, but I was one of the better bad ones. Yeah. Hey, that feels good.

So it's like as long as you're at the top of your class coming up of sucking, and then you're like, oh, well. And then I always wanted to be one of the top guys of the group that was coming up of sucking. And then you're like, oh, well, you know. And then it just, I always wanted to be one of the top guys of the group that was coming up. And I started to feel that happening. And I started to feel that with the response from the audience. And I was like, all right, maybe, you know. And then people coming up going, hey, man, I really thought you were one of the.

And I was like, oh, man, maybe. It went from something to try to like maybe I could do this to then I think I could get good at this. And then it was like, that's just blinders on. This my this i'm doing it good for you not a lot of people find that in their life there's a lot of people still searching for that in their 50s 60s of it you're 100 i'm glad i was in my early 20s but i i heard that you do stand up i did i retired you're done i've taken a hiatus and it's because you're one of your fucking friends who's that well i watched chapelle special on netflix yeah

and i watched it through and i said i should probably never do stand-up again and then i watched paper tiger yeah and i was like yep i should never fucking be that is that is the reason yeah bill is bill was the tip of the iceberg because I mean, just watching a, like yourself, like a master comedian put together a set is something that I would just go up there and spitball for 90 minutes. I would just go up there and bullshit for 90 minutes, tell a bunch of stories, couple callbacks, keep it moving.

But just to be a master of your craft, I had a real self-awareness moment where I was like, you know what? If people can pay and see that show or they can pay and see my show, I should probably take a fucking hike for a while. You're a professional football player, so imagine the time that you put into that, and the time you

put into kicking. Imagine if you did that with, it's the same thing. It would be like if all of a sudden I went to a punting fucking, you know what I mean? Well, that's, I know, well that's exactly what I'm saying, is I would be like, hey, get the fuck off the field. Yeah, Paul, that went 15 yards the wrong way.

Just get out. Yeah. No, but it was real, though. I watched that Paper Tiger, and I was like, holy shit. But you put together that Paper Tiger and Chappelle special. Yeah, back-to-back was legendary. It really was. And as a guy who's inside the comedy world, in listening to their sets, it felt like there was a real moment where those two comedians who are at the top of the craft, right?

Yeah, white guy black guy. So representing literally the top of the class here for everybody. Yep It's felt like they felt like they had to do Comedy a justice like hey, we got to really take because comedy was starting to get attacked. Every joke was getting over thought Oh, why do you think that? It's a fucking joke. Just take it easy. It seems like Bill and Dave had a conversation, like maybe in a comedy store in L.A. late night,

back in the back, they were like, hey, we got to do this or nobody else will. Do you feel the same way? I couldn't agree with you more, and I think comedy needed it, and I was actually just talking to the great Michael O'Brien over there about... Yeah, who is he?

He's a tall, skinny guy. He's a great friend. He's a public he? He's a tall, skinny guy. He's a great friend. He's a publicist. He's the best. But we were just talking. Good guy. Very good guy. Tall and skinny, though.

Very tall and skinny. All right, you don't have to rub it in. I know I'm 5'8". Relax. Yeah, next to you, it was quite a... Yeah, you kept emphasizing the tall. Really tall. He's really tall.

Unlike you. Really tall. You didn't deserve that, Paul. The nice, tall guy. No. I apologize. Me and. Really tall. You didn't deserve that, Paul. The nice tall guy. No. I apologize. Me and Michael were talking about, like, and I said this, and I hate to say this about my home city, but I feel like New York crowds have gotten, have changed a little bit for the worse.

Where, like, you'll be on stage sometimes at one of these clubs, and not all, and it's still, listen, New York stand-up is still incredibly great crowds and smart, but you can feel when you say certain things in certain rooms, you can feel this, well, where's he, you know, like, I won't get into the joke, but I'm doing this bit on... Oh, please do, bury this podcast. I'm just

doing this bit about the WNBA, and I was just talking about how it just doesn't entertain me, but this woman, she just crossed her arms, and she's she just crossed her arms and she's just looking at me and she's shaking her head and I was saying like this woman doesn't know that I have a little girl that I want to have to play sports and equal pay

and equal rights she just looked at me as a misogynist and it's like no I just don't like the WNBA because it sucks it's just not entertaining it's just not entertaining you're not allowed to think that but it has nothing to do with women it has to do with it doesn't entertain me and that's the thing

and people like they want to hear the explanation but you know what you do adjust to it but Bill and Chappelle what they did was they let people know like you're in a comedy club you're in a comedy club so if there was ever a time to just put it all down let the guard and just have a couple of drinks, enjoy the silliness, enjoy the thing. And it was really

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dot com forward slash M-C-A-F-E-E. Back to the combo. I think it was, and it was met with some harsh criticism. For sure. Yeah, both of them were met with some harsh criticism. Always gonna be. By the people, by the way, that none of us would ever want to hang out with right never ever would want to hang out with any of those humans just no leave us the alone anyways but they

they can change some things and i'm happy that dave and bill kind of stepped up for that well that that's actually a really smart thing you said because i remember rest his soul patrice o'neal would say you know when people would walk out right i remember opening for patrice one of the greats and people would walk out and then their mentality for Patrice, one of the greats, and people would walk out. And then their mentality is they were never going to be my fan anyway. If you're going to come to my show

and listen to me say something and then get up and leave, you were never going to come to my theater show when I grew. You were never going to buy anything. You were going to hear that somewhere else and get up and leave. So as a matter of fact, it's better to weed them out.

Yeah. Get out. Because I just want to fill that seat with somebody that wants to hear somebody be honest and real and not get offended. And that's the same thing with people online who, I don't want to say cyberbullying is overrated, but it really is. Like, who gives a fuck what somebody on the internet has to say? That person probably would never be a friend of mine anyways. And by the way, I'd probably hate them too. If they hate me, I'd probably hate them too.

Let's keep it moving. But it seems like we're kind of turning the tide on all these things. I hope so. I think we're kind of turning back. I hope so. I don't know, you know, but I stay away. Another thing we were talking about before the show is like, I got to just, you say something on Twitter and people don't understand.

Oh, you said some awesome shit on Twitter, by the way. Hold on. I was looking into your Twitter there because you were coming on the show. Your last tweet is one that I think resonates with a lot of people that listen to this show. It was last night. When will actors and actresses realize that their political speeches at award shows will never change anything or make a difference? Shut up and say thank you and leave.

That is such a hilarious thought. Because every time somebody wins an award, hey, you read these lines better than everybody else read their lines this year. Congratulations. Here's your moment to do whatever you want to do. By the way, I look at it as an entertainment show, so I think you should be entertaining. I told my lady this last night while we were watching it a little bit during the Browns-Rams game.

I said, I don't want to let you know. I ever win an award, it's going to be an entertaining fucking speech like i don't know what to tell you i'm not going to sit here and just thank everybody i'm going to put on like probably it's going to be a minute long bit probably if i had to guess and my lady's like i would like to be thanked i was like well i'll say thanks to all the people that are supposed to be thanked that involves you there at the beginning she's like no i want a single shout out i'm like well we'll see if that ever happens but nobody ever utilizes that for entertainment. Instead, exactly what you said, it's all about let's change the world on this minute thing.

And it's like when there's 45 of those change the world, yours kind of gets caught up in the mess. And that's what I said. And people will look at that and go, well, what? Is he not for what that person said? It's not about that. See, that's the thing. It's not about that. And unfortunately, today you have to explain that.

And people that really know me know that, of course, I'm fur. I'm just saying when the people... Yeah, we want to make the world a better place. Of course you want the world to be a better place. And of course, if it's your moment. But when it just keeps getting redundant and it's the same thing. You know, I remember years ago, the Beastie Boys, they said something. They said something.

And I remember going, whether people believe that or not, at least they are talking about something different. It was like an issue going on at the time. This just seems like it's like, you know, my parents came here from... It's just like, what? Like, you know? Yeah, like, I'm going back to the Browns

game. Yeah, and that game stunk, by the way. Yeah, it did. And I know for me it's like, it did. It was terrible. That was a tough game to watch. But it's like any ordinary American, it's impossible to take any account of that because it's like, this person's an elitist. They're in a better

position than anyone else watching it. It's like, how can you fucking take anything they're saying seriously? It's tough. They're not talking to you. When you're hopping on a G5 with champagne after you got an Emmy. You're hopping on a G5 with an Emmy and there's champagne at a red carpet

of the steps of the jet you're about to get on. It's a little much. It's just a little much. But people will take, and that's what sucks is people will go on and go, oh, so I guess when that second guy spoke, you're not four. And I'm like, no, it actually has nothing to do with that. And you've got to watch, man, because people will come at you, man.

You can't win with everybody. That's just the world we live in. You're never going to win with everybody. And if you do win with everybody, you're doing something wrong. Hey, if you stand for nothing, you fall for anything. People forget, Paul. I love how you started that like Russell Crowe in Gladiator. Hey, you just stared at me.

I just want to let you know I had a very deep thought coming. I just want to let you know that there was a little bit of a curveball coming. I was waiting for you to rip the shirt off with a metal chest guard. Hey, you're a big-time Giants fan. Big time. This past weekend. Oh, Danny Dimes. Oh, Danny Dimes. Oh, Danny Dimes swept the world, okay?

Oh, my God. A couple years ago, Eli Manning got benched for Geno Smith, a guy who had been punched out by a linebacker in another locker room. The entire Giants fan base was up in arms. Why are we disrespecting Eli like that? This guy traded himself from the Chargers to come here, won a Super Bowl. He doesn't deserve it. Now, with Danny Dimes, it

feels like it's a completely different narrative. And also, Eli... Now, like, ship him out of here! Get a bus! I don't want to see number 10 on the sidelines! Get a bus! No, but it does feel as this is a very different world now that we live in because of the success that Daniel Jones had. If he loses that game, which, Matt Gay was a 34-yard field goal

away from that happening, though to old Danny Dimes. Do you think there's a different narrative today if that ball goes through the uprights? I think the excitement in New York City and I think the Post and the Daily News and all that stuff would still be like, you know, the future looks good. Because he really didn't make mistakes. He threw a 3-36, two touchdowns, ran for two. And the thing that people saw as a New York Giants fan was Eli doesn't have the speed to score there.

So, you know, he's running like he's got leg weights on, right? So by the time he gets to the 10, he's going to get killed. By the time he gets to the 10, it's like quicksand. And, you know, where Jones just saw, Jones just was like, oh, nobody's here. And he runs it up, and you're like, oh, my God. So I think even if the kicker makes that, if he makes that 34-yarder and we lose a heartbreaker like that, it's still positive. But now the fact that we won, it's like the savior, like the savior.

But they've got to be careful with that because the defense stinks. Stinks. The defense stinks, and it doesn't matter who's playing quarterback. That was the one thing about Eli. I know that Eli couldn't do these things, but now Saquon's out. It's going to be tough. But we've got the Redskins next week.

We might go 2-2. Hey. We might go 2-2. Redskins bad at football, too. Yeah. That's good news for you Giants, yes. Were you a fan of the pick initially when they drafted him? No way, Paul.

Listen, I'm on record on my podcast. I've got evidence, guys. I've got evidence. Okay. I said this. The Giants go all in on six you gotta like that from an organization to go look they probably sat down with him and go listen you're our guy and we're not gonna let you fall down to 17. you're our guy so for that thing

I liked him I you know I was little worries coming from Duke it's not a big program they sucked yeah you know yeah but he's also playing with Duke guys. That doesn't get talked about enough. I saw him. So my birthday is Veterans Day, right? November 11th is my birthday. Two years ago, we go to Army. We go to West Point. It's not far. And we go watch Army play Duke.

And I swear to God, this defensive end came around on Army. And when I tell you I thought Daniel Jones, like a cartoon, was embedded in the ground, I go, this kid stinks. I go, this guy sucks. He's just a slow, white shithead. That's what I thought. Are you on record saying that, too? Just so we know.

I go, this guy is just. And then all of a sudden, the next year, he had a good year. And I'm going, wait, is that the number 17 we saw get slaughtered? But when they went in on him and they were like, listen, every time he's improved, he's super smart. He's like Eli, but more athletic. I was like, you know what? I respect an organization for going all in on a guy that they were like, this is either going to be a disaster or we're going to look great. But at least they went in.

The entire world buried Daniel Jones. And this is my thought. It wasn't just Giants fans that said, this guy, this is a terrible pick. It wasn't just Giants fans that said, this guy, this is a terrible pick. It wasn't just Giants sports talk radio show hosts like Francesa who won in very hard against the pick because he felt like with Eli, he could still play winning football. Let's draft a piece around him

to at least give him a chance. But for me, I think what happened to Daniel Jones when everybody buried him. Yeah. Anybody that had a platform that probably shouldn't have a platform to display their opinions went after Daniel Jones when everybody buried him. Yeah. Anybody that had a platform that probably shouldn't have a platform to display their opinions went after Daniel Jones. It was literally the mockery of the draft was how bad of a pick the Giants had.

They booed Daniel Jones at Yankee Stadium. Yeah, exactly. Think about how that's got to feel. He's at a Yankee game. He just moved here. I just wanted to watch a fucking game. Can I get a hot dog? What the fuck?

I just want a ballpark frank and a cold one. And all of a sudden, no, I didn't ask to be on the fucking jumbo truck. They're like bumping him over urinals. Like, move, asshole. I got a piss worse than you do. He's like, what? Where'd you go? Duke?

Yeah, that's what I thought. No, but everybody. And I think that hardened him, right? So I told this story on my radio show. When I got arrested for public intoxication, nobody knew that I was even on the Colts. It was my second year. Hunter Smith was there for 10 years. Nobody even had a clue that I was the punter for the team. But as soon as I got arrested for that, my mugshot didn't look great. I mean, it was a tough mugshot. I mean, public intoxication,

that's what's going to happen. Well, nobody's going to look at a mugshot and be like, did you get new headshots? It was my only professional shot I'd ever gotten in my life up to that point. Look at the star, please. Look at the star. Am I supposed to smile? Don't smile. Oh, my God. Kids are going to see this.

It was an awkward shot. I was wearing some murderer's shirt because they gave me clothes because I showed up shirtless, obviously. And they just said, what size are you? I was like, XL. They were like, what size pants? I was like, 38. They were like, don't know if we have 38. Let's dig deep into the murderer's pile here.

So they were just giving me somebody's clothes, right? When people check into jail, I guess they never come out. They just give their clothes to other people. So I had these FUBU pants on, and I had this dark gray shirt. It looked bad, right? Yeah. But that was my introduction to a lot of people to Earth, and I got buried by everybody.

I'm talking late night show hosts were using me as a punchline. Like, oh, the punter did this, this, this. Really? Everybody in town was mocking me. The news was, hi, we are live from the scene of the crime. It is alleged that he went into the canal right here. The whole thing. I got buried, buried, buried.

And I got to a point where I was very depressed. I was like, holy shit. I really embarrassed everybody. But then once I got past that and my mom was like who gives a fuck you've been drunker than this before i mean this is not the worst thing oh my god that's such a great mom you think you're a piece of shit over that remember you remember when you pissed in our hallway you remember remember that off of, what was it? Mike's Hard Lemonades? No, but once I got past that, I realized... You wiped your ass with the dog!

Once I got past that, I got, like, hardened by it all. I was like, man, none of these people have any idea who I am. None of these people have any clue who I am. And they're just burying me for one night of my life, which they don't even know the other ten nights that could potentially be worse than this. But they're just burying me, burying me. I got to a don't even know the other 10 nights that could potentially be worse than this.

But they're just burying me, burying me. I got to a point where I didn't give a fuck anymore. I was like, I don't care what anybody thinks. And to be honest, it made me who I am. I think Daniel Jones is experiencing that same thing where he doesn't give a fuck anymore. Because you look at that throw where he put it in the corner of Sterling Shepard. There was an easy ball he could have thrown too. But whenever you finally have that moment where you're like, I don't give a fuck.

It's like a freeing feeling. And I feel like Daniel Jones is experiencing that much like I did. I think not only are you right, but I'm going to take it a step further. Let's go. I think Aaron Rodgers waiting in that green room in that draft day to chip on the shoulder. I think Tom Brady going for a walk with his dad on day three going, I might not get in the league. You know, you saw Tom Brady's body.

It's a story, right? You know, yeah. You know, he didn't look like some big, he just was a guy, he didn't even play a lot. And he's just like, you know what? He looked bad in that photo. And then you get in a game, and I even think it's better when you're a backup and they don't expect. And then you're like, you know what?

This is house money. This is gravy now. Everybody thinks I'm the worst draft pick in the history of drafts. Now it's time for me to just go ball out against an average Buccaneer team. But it doesn't matter. Still, without Saquon Barkley, I think it made him better. I think that draft night experience is only going to make him better. And I loved watching him just fucking go for it.

I think that that really, now that we're talking about this, I never even had this thought until right now on your show. But I think opening for Burr. You know, I would open for Burrr and I got to open for Burr Carnegie Hall and Madison Square Garden but also all these amazing theaters across Canada and the United States and having that guy be my best friend and mentor but I would go out there be twenty five hundred thirty eight hundred people there to see Bill and either me and another comedian or just me and I'll

go let me give these people a punch in the face too yeah and it would lift me because I'm like because I want to ultimately get here yes and I got the best guy in the game believing in me thinking I'm funny and putting me here so let me not only for him but let me show yeah you know it's I want to show that for my time I'm going to make an impact and I think that that's what happens with people when you're either doubted or you're kind of lower on the thing on the pole at the time, the totem pole. I think it's the same thing. So I agree with you a hundred percent. Well, here I am sitting in my living room, talking in the phone all by myself again,

just hit some vitamins, feeling pretty good. Also feeling good about my bets this upcoming weekend because I have the greatest app on planet earth when it comes to being a smart gambler. Yes, the Action Network app is the one-stop shop for your gambling knowledge. It's not really gambling anymore now that I use the Action Network. It's actually investing. Yes, investing in my brain. My brain's getting larger, they say, because I'm reading articles telling me where the smart money's going, where the dumb money's going, why I should pick what, all the information I could possibly want or need to dominate a sports book near me. Right now, you

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Getaction.app forward slash pat. Let's make all the monies this year gambling on sports. How'd Bill Burr find you? Because you always hear these stories of like Seinfeld sitting in the back or like Jeff Foxworthy sitting in the back of a thing and being like, hey, I think you're really good. I'm going to take you on tour with me. We're going to make a billion dollars.

Like that happened with the Blue Collar Comedy Tour. Jeff Foxworthy was in the back, I guess, with Bill Engvall, Ron White. He found him. It was like, hey, what's going on? Seinfeld, I guess he sees somebody and does the same thing. Is that what happened with Burr? So in 05, Burr came in, and it was actually his first weekend of selling out a comedy club, and they came for him.

And it was like Opie and Anthony, crowds, and it was like 400 people, and Rascals in Montclair, New Jersey, and I was featuring. I went second. I did like 25 minutes minutes and I did really well I was super nervous it was one of my first big gigs uh coming up and he goes hey man were you the other guy on the show he's like I didn't see it I heard it and he was like you ripped and I go thanks he goes I'm gonna be by the stage on the next one and watch you and he just tapped me he goes man no pressure and I was like oh man yeah no pressure and uh yeah and then he watched me

and I had a really good set. I had a really good weekend. And he goes, Hey man, he was really funny, man. People relate to you, blah,

blah, blah. Let's, let's keep in touch. And then he referred me to a room in Jersey and I did the room that he referred me to in 07. And I thanked him. I go,

man, it went amazing. He goes, next time I'm at that room, you're going to open. And I told him, I said, the 2000 Patriots,

this is how we really, this is the first thing that bonded me and Bill. He's big Patriots fan. Yeah. But the first thing thing that but he can't take the compliments so so you know so here's what bonded us i go dude that 2007 2007 patriots the best offense i've ever seen and i was actually at the game where the giants tried to stop him from going undefeated in the regular season and he's like oh first you know you it's so you don't know which and i'm going no they're the best team like this is the best offense I've ever seen. And that made him and me have this sports bond.

And then it just slowly built from there. That's awesome. But the cool thing about Bill was Bill never gave false hope or lied about anybody's set. And he remembers saying that the lady at the Mitzi Shore, rest her soul, she was the person who would pass you at the comedy store. And she would just be like blatantly honest. And she said the worst thing you could do for somebody is give them false hope or like lie. So I remember opening for Bill in like 07, 08, and I'd be like, all right, man, I had a good set.

What's he going to say? And he would just go, hey, man, nice job this weekend. Good job. We're going to work together again. And I'd be like, all right. job this weekend good job we're gonna work together again and I'd be like all right and then slowly like after like maybe around 2010 2011 like man that bitch you got that's really that's really funny and then it got to the point where like 2013 he was like dude watching what you're doing is a beautiful thing and then I'll never forget somebody called me up and somebody goes Bill

Burgess called you a beast on his podcast and I was like get the fuck out and and it was like because we were just I mean he's my son's godfather i mean he's his family to me now yeah so but we kind of kept work but then it started to get to and then when he wanted to be a part of my special and believed in it like that it was just kind of surreal but like to have that relationship with him i'm glad that it's that way i'm glad that it was that way instead of just being the all the good shit like just no man you gotta like you want to get good, you got to work. Yeah. You got to work. I love that type of story. I got a chance, obviously, to get drafted to the Colts with Vinatieri.

Oh, my God. If it wasn't for working with Adam Vinatieri every day, there's no way I would be where I'm at, right? It's crazy. Watching him work, listening to the feedback, seeing how he handles situations both on and off the field, it taught me more than any class could ever teach me. Eddie Murphy with Chris Rock. Exactly.

I feel like everybody who's ever had a chance to really make it has always been a chance to watch somebody. When your guy is the top of the mountain like Bill Burr, in a world that is involved with egos, right? Because there's a lot of egos in the show business world, a lot of egos, especially with microphones involved. Of course. Is Bill Burr just like a humble dude all the time?

The best. It seems like he really is. No, he's the best. That's who that guy is. But I will tell you this. Not much, but it also puts me under a microscope and hurts me in one sense. And the one sense is that since it's him,

I've had people come out to a club and go, I wanted to see what the fuss about you was with Bill to see. And they kind of have that cross arms like, he funny prove it exactly yeah and i've had people come up and say that so it is a little bit more under a microscope but then like having a you know i had an amazing time in some of the biggest venues like the garden all these places and people like oh you know i get it and i understand why he says that about you but you could definitely feel some people going oh that's burr's guy well let's see you know you can feel it you, but you could definitely feel some people going, oh, that's Burr's guy? Well, let's see.

You could feel it. Yeah. You could definitely feel it. I met Bill Burr, and the first thing I said to him is, Mr. Burr, I'm a massive fan. You would hate me if you ever got to know me, but I love you. And he goes, why would you say that? See, that's him. He can't. Why would you say that?

I'm like, I got a lot of energy. I'm super positive. I just feel like I'd be a guy that you would roast. But I love what you do. He's like, all right a lot of energy. I'm super positive. I just feel like I'd be a guy that you would roast. But I love what you do. He's like, all right. And he just walked away. I'd be a guy that you would roast. And I did a –

That's great. I just changed my Twitter bio a couple – after watching Paper Tiger. I made him chuckle twice in one night. And it was a big night for me. I did the intros for Ruff and Rowdy. And there was this guy that went to jail. He was the second of his. Ruff and Rowdy, and there was this guy that went to jail. He was the second of his. Ruff and Rowdy

is this amateur boxer. Oh, didn't he? He did like commentary. Yeah, he was commentary. And I was in-ring announcing and this kid was like, Sam Smith the second or something like that. He's just some slapdick. And I was like, I made an entire introduction about Sam the

second. The second. entire introduction about Sam the second there was one before he wasn't worth a fuck and now we have second and it's an open mic in an arena right so I'm introducing this in a boxing and all you hear is the cackle Bill. And I was like, oh my god, what a moment. Can somebody clip that? Can somebody please clip that for me, Bill Burr? That's such a funny way to introduce yourself to somebody. It actually goes to show

how down to earth, you're just like, listen, dude, you ever met me, you'd hate me, but it's so disarming that it's like, I'm never going to bother you again. So this interaction is over after this. That's exactly what I said to him. That's so great. Because I am such a fan, and I knew he would absolutely despise everything that I was about.

I saw a clip of you do stand-up in one of the clubs in Indianapolis, and you told a story that killed. And I remember going, hand to God. I'm not just saying this because I'm here. I remember being like, this, I'm not just saying this because I'm here, I remember being like this guy could tell a story this guy's funny and you had the presence about you I'm being dead serious

now this sounds very arrogant especially to a standard comedian I've done like 18 shows 15 of them have been theaters and every single time I go up there I have no fucking idea what's about to happen and then when I come off it's always like yeah pretty good and then and then whenever i watch guys that are actually good at what they at stand up i'm like i should never do that what

i ever did again but yeah but like imagine you did like 10 a week i don't know how you guys do it like if you did 10 a week or even if you did let's say you did five professional shows every week for like three months. So afterwards you'd be like, oh, I'm starting to, something's happening. Yeah, but I don't know how you guys do it. I don't know how you deliver the same shit with the same zest multiple times. Like for me, if I tell the story twice on a stage, I'm done with it. By the time I did, I did one tour through Indiana. It was the I-69 tour, which is a great number, but also an interstate that runs

through Indiana, and we just kind of hit four theaters along there. And by the fourth night, I was like, this story sucks. Like, what are these fucking people aren't going to laugh at this? And then while I'm telling the story, like, a laugh comes, and I'm almost at the point where I'm like, why the fuck are these people laughing? Yes, you get tired. That's the thing, and that's why

it's important for us to, you know, kind of get stuff out. That's why when my album was done, I was like three months I had nothing. When I'll Say This was done, I'm like three, four months went by, Pat. I'm like, dude, I got. And then what happens is you got to get the building blocks. So I look at it like a house and the foundation. So the first piece comes and then you just build up on it that way.

But yeah, but you got to get rid of it it what sucks is you have to deal with the bombing so and a lot of comedians i did my i did my special at the terrytown music hall and a lot of comedians came out it's like a thousand seater and it was great it was a great time but it went well and it went on comedy central but when i would go into the clubs after that younger comedians that were there would come in the back of the room to maybe watch and And now I'm like, I can't do that. I'm not doing that. Because that's done. So they've got to watch me eat shit. And then slowly

he'll just trickle out. He'll be like, oh, he's working on shit. But you're like, yeah. Oh, man. I watched him. Hey, I'm trying to do comedy, but I saw Versi. If that motherfucker's getting money. And that's all that's in your head while you're doing it.

You're going, oh, my God, these guys are looking up to me now. Some of these younger guys are looking up to me now because I'm starting to get the steps that they want and that I worked hard for now. But then they know. And then all of a sudden they're like, oh, that one thing's going to be something. And then fast forward three weeks later, you're like, I want them back in the room. Now watch. And then it builds. So that's the gary goldman thing i watched him on thursday night on his first show and then i watched him saturday night on his last show really different he i don't want to say he sounded like shit on thursday but there was a lot of question marks

thursday i was like why is this guy so gary goldman i was like you know what i'm gonna come back on saturday he had just filmed a special i I guess. So on Thursday, in front of an Indianapolis crowd, he was literally just trying to work through things and by Saturday, he had it figured out. I was like, oh my god, this is an entirely different show all of a sudden. Comedians' brains are an incredible one. It really is. And the fact that you enjoy sports

is fascinating to me because so much happens in sports that are funny, right? And then there's some situations that are just completely asinine. For instance, Antonio Brown. This guy, it's sad. We're at the point where I think everybody agrees that it's a sad situation, what's happening with Antonio Brown.

It's like, golly, man, one of the most gifted athletes of all time, one of the best wide receivers to ever play the game, just can't get out of his own way, it seems like. And at this point if what he's done is he has done officially i hope he gets life in jail right but if any of it's bullshit or whatever and then all the other drama that he's bringing i hope he figures it out it's a sad situation i honestly don't know what to do with it is i was actually talking to a couple of you burr too and i have a theory i have a theory on it okay i think that i think that the what the ct i

think something i think the hits, I honestly, because if you watch the progression, because he was like a lot more tame than Odell. When Odell was on the Giants after a while. He was the crazy one. He was the one, and then I would watch, you know, for me, the straw that was the end was when Saquon Barkley was calming him down. When I saw a rookie having to go up to him on the sidelines

and calm down and melt down, I'm going, you know what? You know what? Get him the fuck. Get him out. Yeah, you guys kind of hated Odell at the end, right? It just got to the point where it was like mental breakdowns and crying and yelling. And then it got to the point where it was like enough. But watching Saquon be the voice of reason to a guy that's been in the league that long.

And then people are like, Antonio Brown a little bit. I'm going, not really. I'll take that guy. But after that hit that he took from, that perfect perfect yeah that hit and then I think one other one and I started to notice and as he as it got long going I think I think something man he's lashing out irrationally he's and the way he talks in interviews now the way he's even talking you're going like doesn't sound the same listen back back. It's something, I think so, and it's sad, man. It really is sad. To watch, too, because this is one of our

listen, when I say our, I mean like somebody who's played in the NFL, got to the NFL. This is one of our premier guys. Yeah, for sure. Antonio Brown is what, fourth round draft pick, I believe, or something like that, out of Central Michigan. Worked his way up to be a stud, like top

receiver in the game, and then now it's just watching everything around him just come crumbling out. The thing that worried me was whenever that John Gruden thing happened, the phone call, whatever team he had around him filming everything, they couldn't wait to get that video out. You know, they couldn't wait to get that video out. And whenever you're trying, it seems like you almost become a magnetic force to drama whenever you're profiting off of drama so whenever you're releasing dramatic youtube videos and things that are not great

it almost feels like more gets dumped in your life and it's almost like it becomes something you can't get rid of or away from and i feel like that's happening in antonio's life the people around him are profiting off of this drama i think so at that point it's just like yeah let's hey let's real housewives this thing Let's see as much shit as we possibly can it's like god damn though. Well imagine this imagine being like alright Dude, the balloons gonna come down over there. I want the camera when the balloon comes down I want the can you're going like what do you just got to a new team and you're worried about landing a hot air balloon On the thing and it's like and that yeah

I agree with you to have like a have like a team of like a television team there. Yeah, it's it's it's like, yeah, I agree with you. To have like a team of, like a television team there, yeah, it's sad, man. It's bad. I don't know if he's going to get another job now. Because if he would have had at least one person say like, listen, you can go after Big Ben. You can go after Shannon Sharp. You can do anything. Like that's not that big of a deal. You probably shouldn't do it.

But if you're taking shots at Kraft, like who the fuck else is going to come get you now? Yeah, probably don't take shots at the owners. Right. Which, by the way, low-hanging fruit there to go after Kraft for that. Yeah, exactly. So I can understand why he took a swing at it, but at some point you would hope somebody in his team is like, let's try to make some money.

Let's try to make money from something or somewhat. And I think he's going to have to disappear for a little bit. I said this on the radio show. You know how, like, actors, they go to rehab, whether it's like sex rehab or this rehab. Really, it's just them disappearing for a couple months so they can come back and say, oh, I had a little getaway, a little stay away.

I think that type of thing has to happen to Antonio. I think he has to disappear for a little bit and come back on the other side. Do you think mid-season, after the investigation, a team will try to pick him up? Or do you think it's going to be a little time? It's been interesting with these NFL investigations. They said they talked to somebody for 10 hours or whatever, and they said, if we find anything that warrants suspension, we will suspend them. They keep saying, if we find anything,

and they just got done with that 10 hours of investigation. So you would think that's the NFL saying, with the first, we weren't able to find anything that's suspendable here. In the next one, there's another one coming. There's a couple different investigations. If it comes back all clean, there is somebody who's going to have their job on the line who's like that needs a receiver that needs a receiver yeah not just a receiver by the way this kid yeah i mean he's fucking the guy which is what makes us all even more so sad because you're talking about

hundreds of millions of dollars this guy could potentially go earn if he just keeps balling out at the level that he does especially with his fitness level and how hard he works and every which is what everybody says i don't know for sure but i would assume that somebody will take a swing on him if all the investigations come back clear if anything pops up though anything at all he'll be on the colin kaepernick list immediately where they're like don't bring him in it's too much of a distraction can i ask you a question because you you asked some questions about comedy i need to ask you something because i'm fascinated everybody always says comedians want to be musicians, right? Comedians want to be

musicians and rock stars and rock stars want to be... No. If I didn't want to do this, I'm an athlete guy. I don't get starstruck, but if Jordan came in here, I would shit myself. You know what I mean? Jordan probably wouldn't talk to you, by the way. I've heard. No, I've heard. Maybe that's probably why

I'd shit myself. Oh, this guy. I'm such a fan. Don't even say hello. But I guess the question is, because you're on the sidelines, standing there, and you're watching. You're watching the Julio Joneses. You're watching these guys. Is it that fast and violent where it's like, if I got hit by...

Because that's what I think about. I'm just like, now they're doing the stat of like, he just ran 21 miles an hour. 21.8 or something. This hard man. This guy I've never heard of before. Me Cole hard man. I have a buddy at the NFL Players Association and they did the year Julio Jones and Vaughn Miller got drafted.

They did a party here at Cipriani's, the NFL and it was the top 10 picks and their families and food and drink and Snoop Dogg did a private concert. Me and my wife were there, right? And, dude, Marshall Falk hit on my wife. That's another story.

But anyways. How did it end up? No, just, I mean, maybe not hit. Maybe that's him saying hi to her, but I didn't like it. He probably did it. You know what? I take that back. He didn't hit on her.

He said, hi, how are you? And I said, how dare this Hall of Famer? How dare this Hall of Famer be nice to my wife? Don't you fucking ask me that. Yeah, I'm like cursing Marshall Faulkner. What happened? I'm like, I don't know. He complimented her shoes.

He overrated anyways. Jeez. Yeah, that's such a typical guy. Like, I think he hit on my wife. Why? Did he do it? No, he didn't do anything. Hey, that happens at comedy clubs a lot. Yeah.

Whenever a couple's coming, if you make the wife laugh or the girl laugh, the guy automatically hates you. Like, you're not that funny. I've seen it happen. I had a girl in Pittsburgh put her hand on my stomach and chest and go, we're going to that bar there. And this giant guy is just staring at me in the face. And I'm like, dude, I did nothing. I did nothing. Hey, that guy's probably Italian, wears affliction, was ready to knock you the out that's pittsburgh but i touched

i said congratulations at this party and i touched vaughn miller right here and it literally felt like touching this side of the it was like touching a cinder block it was it was just it was and i'm going like that guy's gonna run a or a 4.4 or whatever and be that big and strong. And I'm just thinking like that. At what point were you like, I'm glad I'm kicking? Yeah. So whenever I kicked in college, you kick off in college. And whenever you kick off, you watch, right?

Everything happens in front of you. So then I kicked off in the preseason of an NFL game. And you kind of watch, and it was like college speed there. And then the first time I kicked off in the pre-season of an nfl game and you kind of watch and it was like college speed there and then the first time i kicked off in the regular season i kicked off and i saw these dudes who are trying to provide for their family trying to make money for a living trying to do everything whenever they were sprinting down this is back whenever you're allowed a four-man wedge and there were still wedge busters whenever i was jogging down the field and i just saw a guy that was a teammate of mine just run probably a 4 6 40 with complete reckless abandoned dive head first into four human beings and it was just like and i was standing on the field there was a real moment of like

oh fuck like i should not be on the field right now so anytime you saw me during the kickoff i was i removed myself from any potential situation. And then you get into the playoffs. And the playoffs is just like another gear. So you go from like fourth to fifth gear. And then in the Super Bowl, I kicked off the Super Bowl. That is just like you might as well just put that thing on autopilot. People are trying to pop their hamstrings sprinting down the field.

Did you kick it as hard as you possibly could? Me? No, I was just trying not to whiff on the fucking Super Bowl. All those flashes. I thought I was going to whiff. I thought my dick was out there for a little bit. All these pictures. But for me, I'm just trying to do the same kick, trying to stay calm.

But watching these humans just try to make money for their family all crash into each other, that was the moment where I was like, oh, these fucking dudes are next level, man. Because you've got guys 250, 260, running 4-4. Yeah, it's crazy. And on special teams, they don't have to be the smartest guys. They don't have to know the playbook.

They don't have to know the defensive playbook, the offensive playbook, which sometimes holds some freak athletes back. On special teams, it's like see ball, get ball. We had a couple guys that were straight-up killers. I mean, straight-up killers. There was this kid from Florida, 4-4 bulldog, my motherfucking pet, Antonio Morrison. That dude, I don't even know if he knew there was a football on the football field at some point. He was the guy who was like, hey, we need that dude to get taken out on this return,

or everything runs through that guy. And he'd just be like, gotcha, dog. And it would be a kickoff. And that dude, I don't know if the person on the other team knew that 44 was about to come basically decapitate him but he found out relatively quickly and it was just on there was this other kid from kentucky that's nuts this kid from kentucky was like uh i forget his name andrew fuck grill he had a big grill in he was like 255 kind of chubby kind of had a bad body i think everybody

didn't think he was disciplined but man you put him on a kickoff team he was a killer and it was like in the in the huddle we had like a middle onside kick where i would dribble it to myself and we called it one night against houston texans when there was nobody in front of me so i got a chance just to retrieve it myself but when we put it in for another time for the end of the game where they thought people could be in front of us he was the guy a chance just to retrieve it myself. But when we put it in for another time, for the end of the game, where they thought people could be in front of us, he was the guy that was going to go take out the people that were at the line, and I was going to pick up the ball behind him. As soon as we put it in, it was like first quarter, maybe opening kickoff,

he came over to me, and he had this look in his eye. He was like, call that dribble, dog. I'll go decapitate them fools. And I was like, I think we're kicking it deep. I'm going to start a podcast. But that's the guy you want on your side. But those dudes, there used to be some real goons on special teams. Back before, whenever there was the wedge and everything like that,

whenever big hits were almost being encouraged, we had some goons that I was so thankful were on our side. I was like, I love this kid so much. I think he got a couple DUIs and stuff. I don't know what he's into. How many coaches did you play for? Jim Caldwell, then Chuck Pagano.

LJ's too. Yeah, but I was through my rookie year, we were almost completely undefeated until we chose to lose to the New York Jets and then the Buffalo Bills and then we ended up in the Super Bowl playing the Saints Drew Brees beat us and then a couple years later we were almost completely defeated whenever Peyton was out and we were sucking for luck so I've kind of got a chance to kind of see the entire wave of the whole thing but only two coaches okay and you played with luck oh yeah yeah to stick kid I thought he was gonna have a monster year this year do Do you think he's done?

I do. You think he's going to come back? I do. Strictly because he has so much off the field. Does he? I think he's the number one architect recruit in the world. Probably. Let alone his dad is running the XFL now. Let alone all the businesses his family's involved in.

Okay. He's a super brilliant man. I mean, he is next level. Nice guy? Too nice. Too nice of a guy in my eyes. Like, his rookie because I came straight out of watching Peyton Manning kind of run the team. He was the general manager

of the team. So if practice wasn't going good, Peyton would start over practice. If Peyton wanted to do this, Peyton's doing this. If Peyton wanted you on the field, you're on the field. Wanted you off the field, kick you right off the fucking field. Like, that was the type of Peyton was the GM of the team. Wow. Bill Pullian, obviously a brilliant man, was able to draft well. But, that was the type of, Peyton was the GM of the team. Wow. Bill Pullian, obviously, a brilliant man, was able to draft well.

But if Peyton wasn't something, it was happening, right? It was like almost direct line to Ursae, here we go, this is how this is all running. We were on Peyton's team. So it's kind of weird

being his friend because you never knew who you were talking to. Like, hey, Peyton, I'm about to go to fucking bong outside. Is he going to laugh or is he going to cut me for that?

You know what I mean? It's like, you don't really know what you're getting. I think that was kind of a tough thing, which I think a lot of his teammates got. You never knew who you were talking to because he was that guy, right? Great teammate, though. We're talking about a guy that drank beer with people.

Good teammate. Luck was just so nice. So, like, if the offensive line sucked, he wouldn't be like, hey, pick it the fuck up. Like, Peyton would be like, hey, I need you to do this because if you do this I'm better if I'm better our team's better everybody's happier Andrew was too nice of a guy he didn't have that in him to be an asshole until later I think maybe after I left I'm not sure right but I think if he would have done that earlier he's healthier he's probably still playing so almost his niceness is almost what was ultimately his Achilles because he wasn't he didn't force people to be held accountable as much.

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bidding. Remember, there's a 90-day money-back guarantee and shipping is always free. Don't wait, start bidding today. Deal-dot-com, code America. All right, let's get to it. I feel like this is going to be a regrettable website for me because literally there's just so much awesome shit on here. But I'm going to be able to get things at a great deal, and that's what I'm all about. DioDash.com, Code America. I feel like those, like we were saying, like everyone says Jordan could be an asshole,

and it seems like a lot of great athletes have that thing where you're like, yeah, I met him. It was kind of disappointing. Where, like, LeBron seems like a good dad and a nice guy. And it's like, you know. Well, I think to get up there in that rarefied air, it takes a certain amount of selfishness, right? Yes. To get up into that rarefied air, it takes a certain amount of selfishness. You've got to look out for you a lot to get up to the top, which, by the way, that's across all CEOs, executives.

You're talking about business owners, athletes of all sports. To get to that rarefied air of being the greatest, it takes a little bit of selfishness, I think. And I would assume that LeBron trying to trademark Taco Tuesday is a good evidence of that. But aside from that, he does feel like he's the most human elite athlete of all time. Yeah, no, I agree. I think that if you're super nice, even in comedy, they're like, ah, we could pay him less. We could, you know, we'll give him a shittier week.

You know, it's like you got to be a little bit like, as soon as I got to a point in comedy where I could say no to gigs, things... I'm missing a production in comedy where I could say no to gigs, things... I'm missing a production meeting right now as we speak. This conversation is too good. Oh, dude. I'm missing an ESPN production meeting. People that are listening know that I'm currently missing a production meeting for Thursday night's game, Navy versus Memphis.

Sorry, I know nothing going into that meeting, though. I have no idea what we're supposed to talk about. How funny would it be like, Wait, go to what he missed us for, and it's me and you going, Jordan's an asshole! That got fired from ESPN for shitting on Jordan and talking about Andrew Luck for, you know,

20 minutes. No, by the way, I've never met Jordan. I have met Scotty Pippen, though. Yeah. And he's a much better golfer than people say. Scotty Pippen holed out on me from like 85 yards out to fucking make eagle to bury my... You golf? No. Okay. But I swing

the club. Yeah, yeah, you swing the club. I swing the club. And I think it was very obvious down in the Bahamas that I'm not great at golf. I got beat by Scottie Pippen in this NBA vs. NFL thing. And I just got fucking murdered in the whole thing. But we won. I am an undefeated golfer. I'm undefeated. I have a championship belt and everything. Me, Aaron

Rogers and the boys took down the NBA. Scotty Pippen, Jared Smith. He came to a show. I met him. Aaron Rogers? Yeah. Good dude. He came to a show. He's a big comedy fan. Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah. I could tell he didn't want to he wanted to keep hanging. He was like he was cool, man. I love Aaron Rogers. He's a good friend of the show. Oh yes.

He has a lot. He told me down at that golf tournament I was like why don't you ever talk more to anybody And he was like well this guy He gets like misquoted a lot Things get taken out of context So he said his whole life motto is kill him with indifference Which is a hell of a fucking He just doesn't respond to anything

Like oh Aaron Rodgers is the worst brother of all time No answer Oh Aaron Rodgers is the greatest quarterback of all time. No answer. Oh, Aaron Rodgers is the greatest quarterback of all time. No answer. It's just always just, whew. He just, yeah. Just does his thing. And they look like they're a good team this year.

I thanked him. How funny is this? This is how much of a Giants fan I am. He came to a show, and I go, hey, dude, can I just say something? I go, I'm a Giants fan. I go, thank you. I go, that pass you threw against the Cowboys on the sideline to kick that field goal and have that place file out like a funeral.

Thank you. And he just goes, yeah. And he goes, yeah, we beat them this year too. So smooth, by the way. No, just calm. Like I was like, you know, he was happy that I'm a Giants fan who was happy that he beat my rival, that he was just like, oh, we did it again. Like that's how great of a guy.

Hey, by the way, yeah, we did it for you again this year. Yeah, by the way, we did it for you again. And he's a very, like, calm deme way, we did it for you again this year. Yeah, by the way, we did it for you again. And he's a very calm demeanor. And when he speaks, it's always just very well thought out, but there's zero inflection. He's a dry, dry sense of humor human, which not a lot of people can get. So it can be misunderstood by people. Yeah, they just think he's a prick. Yeah, exactly.

It's the complete opposite, actually. It's actually the complete opposite. He's got a good sense of humor, and he's like a goofball in a way but he just kind of you know seems like he seems like he laughs at silly stuff so do you know how everybody was burying him in the floor for their relationship everybody was coach yes everybody was burying him so the first time he really spoke about it was on my show so i was like how are you in coastal floor everybody's talking about you two hating each other he's like, he's taking a bunch of average Joes, and he's really making us believe in ourselves.

And he took it to a dodgeball reference for Peter LaFleur. Yeah, that was his answer for this massive. Oh, my God. Yeah, it was beautiful. I just started crying laughing. I was like, ah, it's fucking brilliant right there. Oh, my God. That's so great.

Yes, it's brilliant. Like, to know that and to do it like that. Live, too. He knows everybody wants to hear this answer, too. Everybody on earth was just listening in like, what the fuck did he say? He hates that coach, doesn't he? I love the mustache he did for the, you know, Happy Gilmore. Yeah.

Yeah. My fingers hurt. Now your back's going to hurt. It's just the landscaping duty. Where can people see you be hilarious at? Oh, man, this weekend. I'm doing four big shows. Gotham Comedy Club, man, one of my

favorite clubs to headline. My home city. Did it last year. It was a great time. Doing a completely new hour for my special. I'll be there this Friday, September 27th, two shows, and this Saturday, the 28th, two shows. Well, I appreciate you so much for stopping by. Dude, man, you're the best, man. Yeah, you're the best. Yeah, I'm glad

we got to hang, and I appreciate it, man. Great to meet you. That's Ty. Ty's an owner of the Packers. Yes, I am you so much for stopping by. Dude, man, you're the best, man. Yeah, you're the best, Paul. Yeah, I'm glad we got to hang and, you know, I appreciate it, man. Great to meet you. Ty's an owner of the Packers. Yes, I am. Are you? That's actually what the mustache is for. Oh, I like it. Yeah, Rodgers, not shaving it until the Packers lose.

I went to Lambeau. It was on the list. We went to Lambeau against the Lions last year, Monday Night Football. That place is cool, isn't it? It was real cool. It was real cool, actually. The Lions at Lambeau last year? The Lions at Lambeau.

Was it last year or the year before? Two years ago. The year before. He called the game. I called the game last year. 31-0. The Lions at Lambeau? The Lions at Lambeau. Was it last year or the year before? Two years before. I called the game last year. 31-0. Lions won into Lambeau and stomped a mud hole in the backers. Wait, was that when Rodgers was hurt? Yeah. Oh, I was at that game.

Second play of the game, concussion. Okay, so wait. Remember when he got to surgery on the collarbone? Yeah, yeah, that's not that one. This one he had a concussion. Second play of the game, week 17. Nothing on the line. Okay. But people are saying, yeah, that's not that one. This one he had a concussion, second play of the game, week 17. Nothing on the line. But people are saying, arguably,

the greatest commentated football game in the history of football. Undefeated since then, by the way. Undefeated. The Lions are undefeated since then. There's a Lions fan in the headset. Alright. Thanks for having me, man. Hey, Paul, you're fucking hilarious, dude. You're the best. Hey, Bill Burr presents good shit, I would imagine.

I got to meet meet and shake his hand one time feels like that's an accurate thing uh follow him on the social medias at paul verzi uh virzi you a paisan uh my mother's greek my father's sicilian we saw the greek diplomat land um at the airport that we landed at i don't know what the fuck they're doing that's great yeah but i want to let you know we almost got kicked out of our own country. You said it like, yeah, but you just got so serious. You're like, do we pass a Greek restaurant? There was a Greek restaurant out here.

Our plane landed, and there was 55 black SUVs with cops and everything. We're like, oh, fuck, here we go. Oh, because it's all happening here. Right now. Everybody's from everywhere is here Yeah so we're filming it obviously And we almost got kicked out of our own country For filming the Greek diplomat

The person was like put the camera down I was like who gives a fuck What's that guy gonna do kick me out of Greece They don't like being filmed I don't give a fuck don't go back to their country They're in my country now motherfucker Yeah yeah Anyways they deserve it.

They're probably doing the Lord's work if I had to guess. We are not. We are just doing stupidity on a daily basis. We can't thank you enough for listening.

You're the greatest. Hashtag end game. Hashtag end game. Send me, Ty Schmidt, and at Paul Verzi something. If you make us laugh,

you'll get some free merch. Sound like a good deal? Great. If they make you laugh, get some free merch. You'll just respond by going, ha ha. Only pick a couple, though. We are a small business. Let's not be giving away all the fucking shirts.

Yeah, everything's ha ha. You guys probably got 151 shirts. Might be the first person that makes Paul laugh. Might be the first 10. We'll see how it goes. Thank you so much for listening. Yeah. Yeah, I'm out that Brooklyn.

Now I'm down in Tribeca. Right next to the narrow. But I'll be hood forever. I'm the new Sinatra. And since I made it here I can make it anywhere, yeah they love me everywhere I used to cop in Harlem, all of my Dominicanos Right there up on Broadway, brought me back to that McDonald's

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In New York The comfy jungle where dreams are made of There's nothing you can't do Count your New York These streets will make you feel brand new Big lights will inspire you Let's hear it for New York New York, New York