The Prepper Broadcasting Network - 2025.11.07 - Reliance - Put Away Offense

Episode Date: November 9, 2025

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Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another. Be angry and do not sin. Do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil. Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need. Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear, and do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted,

forgiving one another, as God and Christ forgave you. Jesus, we love you, we bless you, and we praise you. Work a transforming work in our hearts, Lord. where we have exhibited hard hardness, where we have taken offense, where we have spoken out of turn, where we have grieved you, Holy Spirit, forgive us. Forgive us our transgressions, Lord, and show us how to forgive those who trespass against us. Jesus, you are good and your mercy endures forever. Your mercies are new every morning, and we need them, Lord, every morning. We need your grace all the time in order to operate in our world, in order to fulfill the call that you have placed on our lives, in order to meet the responsibilities that we have and to meet the needs

of those around us. God, it is you who gives the power for us to be conformed to your image. So, Lord, do that work in our hearts. Help us to be tenderhearted. Help us to be diligent. help us to be seekers of your kingdom. Lord, we want your name to be lifted up. So use our lives for your glory. Use the power that you have to transform us so that we could show others through the testimony of our behavior what your love is like.

God, help us to do these things. Forgive us for all of the times that we have fallen short. Help us to move forward in the peace. peace that passes understanding, in a joy that is overpowering, and in the grace that you provide. In Jesus' name, amen. There are many times in our lives where there is an offense, an offense aimed at us, and whether it is casual, incidental, or direct persecution, or malice or hatred, everything can be directed against us. And in those times, there is a promise in Scripture that when we behave and when we respond

properly, that the grace of God will be with us, that by showing the love of God to others, even if the scenario does not resolve immediately that we have done the right thing and pursued the righteousness of God, and that that is fulfilling our duty. And ultimately, brothers and sisters, we have to understand that as we fulfill the duties given to us by God, even if that requires putting off the satisfaction of being offended and scoring a point and making someone else feel lesser than, that any so-called wins in that regard are not victories for the cause of Christ. And I think it's a very difficult thing for men in particular to come to the point where we are satisfied with the way that we have handled things instead of just the resolution of the matter.

it is more common for our reasoning and our style and of course not everybody is the same in this but we like to see the ends accomplished if there's a conflict we like to see it resolved if there's a problem we want to see a solution if there is a need we want to act and brothers i would encourage you in the lord that how we get to a solution is even more important. And we have to understand that in certain cases, there are solutions that can only come about in a period of time and with things being out of our control,

we may not be able to dictate the terms of that solution. And that puts us in an awkward position. So let's say that there's a conflict between neighbors and there's a general disagreement about something. there is a way of getting to a resolution you can exert power and influence and strength and all of these other things you can forcibly through a variety of different means get your way but resolving things is not the same as acting in a godly way and the point I'm trying to make here, ultimately, is that regardless of where that path takes us when we're resolving

a dispute, or when someone has offended us, or when something has gone wrong, or we've gotten bad news, our responsibility is to react accordingly, avoiding any kind of corrupting talk, avoiding frivolous words, avoiding malice, avoiding bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander putting all of those things aside because they grieve the Holy Spirit. Even if those things help get us to a resolution according to our eyes and according to what we can see, it has created more problems. So we can solve the problem, solving a dispute by haranguing a neighbor until they just give in, by being ornery and disagreeable, and using whatever Machiavellian means necessary to get our way, but in solving the problem, we don't want to create additional problems.

And I would say, brothers, that we should classify grieving the Holy Spirit as a big problem. This world is treacherous and challenging to navigate. If we don't have the Holy Spirit of God who has promised to lead us into all truth and righteousness, if we can't hear the still small voice of God because it's drowned out by the malice in our minds, then we are going to run into great difficulty. Even if we can solve a problem, if we haven't done so the right way, it would be much better to behave in a righteous manner, to avoid taking offense, to handle things with tact and with responsibility for the spiritual picture's sake. And we don't do this very well in many

cases because our quick reaction and our primary instinct is to say, okay, see a problem, let's solve it. And we have to be careful and tread lightly and be very quick to cut off those impulses by taking every thought captive. And if we know the word of God and we've spent time with the Lord and we've been in prayer and we've been seeking his face and we have been transformed by the power of the Holy Spirit to truly wanting the will of God in our lives, then it will be much easier. It will be much quicker for us to consider the facts of the situation and to arrive at an approach. What's more important than the resolution is the approach. The right approach will bring about the right resolution. And it is just such an easy thing for problems to

compound, even when we think we've solved them. And of course, isn't this the primary mechanism of denial in a psychological way? If a problem comes up, we can successfully remove the negative emotional impact of the problem by denying it and putting it away. But that doesn't lead to real resolution. And that should be very clear. And there have been many people in recent years who talk specifically about the need to encounter problems, the need to challenge ourselves, the need to continue to push and to bear responsibility and everything else like that. But I would say that one of the next level challenges of that is navigating the problems

with a kind of poise and spiritual maturity that prevents these other problems from coming up. Yes, we do want to be bold. We do want to solve problems. We do want to find our way to a resolution. but a resolution that has along the way resulted in disobedience to the commands of God about how we are supposed to live our lives is no resolution at all. And yes, there is a phrase that it's better to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission, but you don't want to approach a situation where someone has offended you.

Maybe it's even someone you love. They've offended you and then you get into a situation where you say, okay well I'm going to handle this matter and we compose ourselves and comport ourselves in ways that are unbecoming yes the situation has been dealt with but now more problems have popped up and they can extend and grow roots and sink into us until they become not just a foothold for the enemy but a stronghold in our very ways of thinking so I would say brothers that it's incredibly important for us, even if we are angry, and there are plenty of things to be angry about, that we should take the word of God seriously to give no opportunity

to the devil. And that means if we abide in this anger, in this malice, in this taking offense, then we are opening ourselves up to greater challenges. And I think a lot of this comes from the flippancy by which we talk. talk. So what do we mean here? What does Paul mean when he's saying, let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up as fits the occasion that it may give grace to those who hear? So you might say, well, as fitting the occasion, sometimes things need to be harsh and things need to be severe and that is what's called for. And I understand

that. I've been in those situations myself and sometimes some directness, some severity is appropriate, but keep in mind that Paul conditions this. He says that it may give grace to those who hear. Okay, so where is the balance here? Sometimes a message of a challenging or difficult truth needs to be put on the table, but can it be done with grace? Can it be done in the right way? There are many families who have a hard time navigating things, particularly in challenging times when kids are teenagers and everything else like this, because fathers have provoked their children to wrath, because of a desire to control and to see problems solved and to get to the outcome. And people haven't done things in a way that gives grace to those who hear. And so we are rarely up for this task. And it's typically things that come out of nowhere, come out of the blue, that can surprise us, that catch us off guard.

If we had a ton of time to sit and to think and to go through these things, then we would hopefully, in the cold light of day, looking at the scripture and taking our time and praying and seeking God's face that we would get to a result. But sometimes, as you know, whether it's on the job or in family or in social situations, you can't just retreat to yourself for a week to work out a perfect response. And even that could be subject to overthinking and drama and everything else like this. And so we have to respond on the fly and we have to be able to do that. And the only way that that's going to happen, brothers and sisters, is if we compose ourselves in such a way that that we are following the Holy Spirit, and we are endeavoring to walk this out,

to give grace to those who hear. And what is the command here? What's the instruction? Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another as God and Christ forgave you. And elsewhere, right after the Lord's Prayer, Jesus teaches us that if we don't forgive others, then God will not forgive us.

And that language is not hyperbolic. Now, what it means in terms of our theology of salvation, in terms of our soteriology, that can be left up for debate. But certainly, what we should take away from it is that we should, not just should, but we must forgive others. And that is challenging sometimes. It can be very difficult to hold your tongue, especially when you know an answer, but you haven't figured out exactly. the right way to get there with tact and with wisdom. And there are a couple pieces of advice I can give that I've found to be very helpful in my own life. The first, in terms of our

communication in those moments, is it's okay to take a second. Oftentimes when I'm helping people prepare for job interviews and everything else like that, especially when people are less experienced, there is a tendency to want to avoid extended periods of silence. But our perception of that kind of silence and conversation, that kind of inaction, is much different than the people surrounding us. Yes, if you're having a conversation and you took a 30 second pause, that's going to feel unnatural. But a three second pause barely registers to people, even if it can feel like an eternity in our own minds and just like there's this impulse to say, I have to say something, I have to say something. But it is okay to be patient.

It's okay to be gentle. The Bible also instructs us in many proverbs to hold our tongue, to hear the matter out. And that's why the technique of asking clarifying questions is extremely helpful. For instance, if someone says something to you and you want to think about it some more, get them to reveal some more information because people are imperfect communicators. It may very well be that they haven't given you all of the information. And in fact, that's almost always the case. And so a good way to do that is called mirroring, where you repeat back the last few words that they've said in an upward inflection. So as you're asking them to clarify, ask you. As a them to expand and that way you don't have to go on an extended diatribe to say I'm

confused about what you mean by this I was thinking it was this but I'm not quite sure can you explain this to me you don't have to prompt that because that's kind of an awkward way of handling it but if you just follow up with a reaction of questioning people aren't going to take that as a indication that you have no idea what's going on. They will take it as an invitation to help clarify and expand their position. And this is typically helpful in situations where people have just reacted and they need to calm down a little bit when the temperature is a little bit too high or they've planned out a response in a negotiation and they're being very tactical in terms of what they say and what they don't. It's a very difficult

rhetorical device to avoid by the other people in the conversation because it's just such an open and a friendly invitation to clarify. And you don't even have to ask anything that might communicate weakness like help me understand or I'm not sure what you're getting at or other things like that because those carry with it the connotation depending on how people's disposition is that oh well you haven't explained things very well or you know you haven't done a good job here. So long story short, we have a biblical command to forgive one another, to not let corrupting talk come out of our mouths. We have to engage and we have to be able to make these decisions on the fly as they come up in order to respond appropriately to every moment. And we don't

want to grieve the Holy Spirit of God. And so that takes a lot of self-observation and self-control and introspection, but all of that, all of that progress, all of that transformation, which God is still working through in my life and is capable, well able, and desiring of helping you in your efforts to make that transformation as well. This is an ongoing process where we are renewed in our spirit, renewed in our minds, renewed in our hearts, so that we can get to the point where we react properly, where we respond properly, where we have thoughtful instincts and core values, and if we don't have that intention, if we're not even aiming at that, then our responses are going to be more

reactionary. They're going to be more harsh. And we've all had regrets about things that we've said that we realize, yeah, that wasn't the right path. That wasn't the right way to handle that situation and if so we have to ask for forgiveness of the person who we have stepped against and from the Lord as well for not handling ourselves properly but it's all a function of the grace that God wants to provide us so that we can operate properly with wisdom with tact and the Bible also tells us that nobody can tame the tongue but if we listen to the Holy Spirit before speaking then we will grow more acclimated to an instinctual sense of the wrong reaction. Another thing that can be helpful, in addition to the mirroring modality of questions,

is to assume that until proven otherwise, then if someone has an issue and it comes to you or something says something that rubs you the wrong way, that it is probably about, something else. Like unless we have clearly done something aggravating, then we don't know what's going on in people's lives, the kind of challenges they're facing, the kind of pressure they're under, the kind of loss they've experienced, the kind of emotions they're going through. And sometimes that just gets directed at others because we're people. We're imperfect at controlling those things. And it can often spill over in a variety of different ways. Very few of them helpful and most of them hurtful, unfortunately. But we are to compose ourselves in a better way.

We are supposed to de-escalate unless escalation is appropriate. And that's very rare. There are certain times when escalation is appropriate, but not only is that not always the case. That's also not usually the case. And brothers, I would say to you that far too many of us let the sun go on our anger. And trust me, I understand there are many things that are anger-inducing, that are wrathful. We are absolutely in a fever-pitched spiritual battle right now and have been in that and will be in that for the foreseeable future. But the peace of God that passes all understanding can be present in our lives at the same time that all of this is going on. And if we revel in or just sit and wallow in anger or fear or malice, if we grit our teeth, not only is this bad for our health, it's bad for our bodies, it's bad for our spirits, it's bad for those around us.

And it interferes with the work that God wants to do in our lives. would we ever deliberately say my purpose when I get up today is to grieve the Holy Spirit? That is not what's going on. What's going on is that we're still in the midst of a sinful world. We are very personal and controlling and we want things to be handled. We want problems to be solved. And sometimes what appears to be a solution, if we see an awesome, ramp to that, then we'll take it, particularly if it's an off ramp that removes a problem,

removes an issue, removes a consideration, takes away something that's been bothering us, and it allows us to demonstrate control over that issue, control over that thing. That's a very attractive option. But we typically don't, as our first reaction, say, well, what should my response be here in accord with godly principles, in accordance with what I have been commanded to do and the attitude that I've been commanded to have. Because keep in mind, brothers and sisters,

that Jesus, in the sermon on the mount, expanded the domain of sin and righteousness beyond just acting things out in the world and into our thought lives in a meaningful way. Now, a fleeting or intrusive thought, a fiery dart from the enemy, me, that's not something that we all immediately have to take ownership of, but it's our job to take those sorts of things captive. And I'm making the case, or attempting to, as best

I can, that it is absolutely worth taking a breath, asking a question, considering the alternatives. And that can be done fairly quickly once we get used to operating this way. Once we get used to operating this way in accordance with this instruction, this command to be kind to one another, to be tenderhearted, to forgive one another, then letting those things go, sometimes not even speaking at all, but just hearing people out, and everything else is appropriate. And that doesn't mean that we have to compromise our principles or we have to let people walk over us or that we have to seed control in a way that is unhealthy. But what it does mean is that we absolutely owe it to the God who saved us, to the God who forgives us, to the God who restores us, who gives us new life, to the God of all things, to the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords, to Jesus, who has promised us an eternal way of glory. We owe it to him, the champion of our cause, the savior of our souls. We owe it to him to respond properly to situations, to handle the pressure well. And it's this subtle need for closure and reconciliation that we can just rush into that often creates these pitfalls.

Now, we're typically not in situations where we're going to have huge anger problems and just fly off the handle it, nothing. but every once in a while does corrupting talk come out of our mouths do we say something slanderous and offensive even if it's just on a momentary basis because i'm sure we've all been in situations where it's like man if i i had that chance again here's what i would have said i would have just spoken the full truth and let people know what's going on and there are people who are just disposed by personality to operate in exactly that way. Some people don't feel settled until they've spoken everything possible on the matter, including all of the different emotional states. But here's a word of advice and a word of caution. Most people, when we engage

in conversation, especially when there's a problem at hand, we're not dealing with well-rehearsed answers. We're dealing with people who are put in emotionally stressful situations of any number of different kinds, of any different number of degrees. And so in those cases, people don't always speak precisely, effectually. People don't always speak generously. In fact, in many cases, they do the exact opposite. And so we don't have to necessarily sit down and spend three days trying to unpack it. What did you mean by this? What did you mean by that?

Getting down to the nitty gritty of every single thing. We can simply be charitable and be kind and give people the benefit of the doubt in terms of their behavior towards us. And that also, again, doesn't mean that we should be a pushover or, let people take advantage of us. There's a difference between something spontaneous where people haven't thought things through and premeditated evil, premeditated damage that is being done against us. So we have to be very discerning, brothers. And most of all, we have to be turning our discernment inward to our own thought lives,

to the way that we handle these situations, to the way that problems come up. So the next time that there is conflict or contention or a problem, I pray that the Lord would help you and that the Lord would help me to understand that and go through the different reactions, screening them out quickly and say, well, should I do this? No, there's a check in my spirit about that. That's not really tenderhearted. That's not really forgiving the way that I should. Now, there are some offenses that are truly grievous, and even if you say, I want to forgive this person, I want to forgive myself, I want to move on from it, sometimes that has to happen in stages. You don't, as one of the other morals of this story, you don't have to come to a full resolution right away. you have an obligation to fulfill what our instructions are from the Word of God about how we should

behave and how we should handle ourselves before people. But in many cases, that means that we're listening more than we're speaking, and it might even seem that for a time we're not advancing towards a solution. But it means that if we are following the Bible, if we are being disciples by the Holy Spirit, by good spiritual wisdom, from mentors, from people who have been in those situations before and have plenty of things to teach us. Then we will move forward. We are supposed to abound in the fruit of the spirit. God has not called us to be full of wrath and anger and slander and malice and bitterness and unforgiveness. That is not the life that Christ died to give us. There will be many opportunities for us to have those

sorts of reactions, but in no case, brothers, is that helpful? We have to put away falsehood, speak truth with one another, don't let the sun go down on our anger, and just enough of the corrupting talk coming out of our mouths. There is far too much of it. And it is incumbent upon all of us to be diligent, to speak so that grace is given to those who hear. And again, it doesn't mean dismissing problems. We have to encounter them head on, but we have to do so with grace and to do so with the will of the Lord and to do so as the Holy Spirit leads. Let's be more sensitive to that still small voice that would direct us, even in moments

when we need an instant decision that would help us have the right kind of response instead of just reacting according to the flesh. So, Lord, we commit this time to you and we pray that you would reinforce it, that you would strengthen it, that you would clarify it. Lord, all of this is yours. And I pray that you would continue to work a transforming work in my life so that I could be more tenderhearted so that the things that I do could demonstrate grace to others. Lord, your will be accomplished. We want to be conformed to your image. Holy Spirit, we want to hear from you. We need to hear from you. Without your grace, without your mercy, without your forgiveness, without your power, we can do nothing. But in you, Jesus, we can do all things, including

diffusing conflict, including solving problems, and including enabling us to speak properly and to avoid all of these things that you have told us to avoid. We know that they're bad, Lord, but it's part of our fleshly nature that we have to lay down, that we have to give up, that we have to allow you to prune out of us. So Jesus, be glorified in what we do. And I pray, Holy Spirit, that you would give each and every one of us wisdom to handle the next time that someone has offended us or brings a problem to us or where there's a conflict that requires resolution. God, be glorified. in this. Let your grace be shown to this generation because of the testimony of your people who are following your instructions, who are following your inspired scripture. Lord, help us to be better at

this. Help us not to grieve you. And Lord, forgive us where we have. Bring it to mind, Lord. Bring all the situations to mind so that we can lay them at your feet and ask for you to forgive them and to redeem them and to show us what we need to do and how we should handle ourselves so that all our speech may give grace to those who hear. We bless you, Lord, and we praise you. In Jesus' name, amen.