The Prepper Broadcasting Network - Preppers LIVE: Funny Folies & Fails

Episode Date: August 6, 2024

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You're listening to P.B.N. Your path back to stability. what is up pbn family back at it monday preppers live man it has been a wild day running running all day and uh ran right here right in time i was literally eating a bowl of life cereal begging jay ferg to let me call her in five minutes at like five minutes till nine so i'm sorry we're late that's all my fault for sure so we got a show for you tonight that is uh it comes from the it's the brainchild of lisa t the socal prepper as formerly known that the tennessee prepper now i guess and uh so we're gonna we're gonna discuss one of my favorite topics which is when stuff is gets funny and stuff goes wrong in

the self-reliance and homesteading and prepping world because that shit happens a lot. And most people don't talk about it. Of all the YouTube videos and podcasts and things like that that I have seen, it's very rare for people to admit defeat or to talk about the things that go wrong. You know, it's fun. It's fun, and you learn probably some of your best lessons that way. One of my favorites of recent times is when Dave Jones and I and Ben, I think, Ben the Breaker of the Banksters, were all splitting some hog. And we were supposed to get this big, giant 200-pound hog. And Dave Jones calls me from the farm and says, the hog got out, out and it took off down the hill and we can't get it back and we wound up with four piglets

instead which was the better meat i think in my opinion but you never know when a hog will go awry so let me let me get everybody unmuted before we get 10 minutes into a great story and I go, oh, nobody heard that but me. So what is up, everybody? We got Jay Ferg. We got Lisa with us. Hello. And we got Sarah Hathaway with us. I mean, this is the trifecta here of lady preppers on the

prepper broadcasting network yeah let's do this is the pbn sirens here you guys better watch your step because it's it's real i can't even imagine you know sarah and and jordan at prepper camp is a force to be reckoned with in and of itself once lisa finds her way there yeah once lisa finds her way there could be wild but uh commander you realize that the three of us have different uh things so it's like one of us is white one of us is dark and one of us is like in between i see jordan as uh the sookie from uh witches of eastwick oh susan sarandon and sarah yeah yeah that means you're share okay uh no okay it's a good movie though share. Share. Share. Even Share got an Emmy. Share!

Woohoo! But thank you, Commander, for letting me do this, because I thought we needed to have some fun with all the sadness and all the crazy things happening. I thought, you know what? It's so depressing. We need to start having fun. We need to have something lively. Break the depression.

Oh, I was nervous. I was nervous. I thought we were going to be in World War III tonight having this conversation. So I'm glad the Iranians staved off for a bit. But yeah, you're right. We do need a break. There's so much in the news. It's insane.

So I'm glad you brought this to my attention. The plan is afoot. It has been launched. And then Sarah launching that video that I just finished watching right before you guys called me. And I was like, oh, yeah, that one was dead on. Oh, that's some legit stuff, huh? She is an investigative reporter. And wow, that's all I can say. I still haven't watched it.

You're talking Black Rock Lady? Yeah, with what Black Rock plans do with tokenizing everything. Yeah, it's seriously crazy stuff. I'll go grab it off YouTube and throw it up in the chat. Yeah, there you go. That's a great idea. All right. Can I go next?

Go ahead. Yeah, lead off because this was your idea. My funny part was it started as a fail, and then I couldn't stop laughing. It was in this last December when I was job hunting, and I was bored, and it was absolutely freezing. And I thought, I need to do something. I'll make sterno. How hard could it be? So I'm watching all the videos on youtube and they're talking about you

know you could buy like six dozen eggs use the shells i'm thinking oh god i don't want to crack that many eggs and i thought wait a minute what are eggshells i'll do chalk and then i realized wait i don't want to buy that much chocolate let alone try to destroy it i could dig deeper and oh i'll buy the calcium citric get it off e. And they talk about in order to make the sterner really, really strong, you have to have like a 91% proof rubbing alcohol. They're not joking when they say on the warning label, you better have ventilation. I did not open up the door fast enough to my balcony and turn on the fan and an oxygen cleaner because Bruno and I, I could tell he wasn't feeling good.

He was falling over. I was like, oh, God. So I was like, okay, this isn't good. So I'm trying to follow the directions on how to do this. And it's like talking, you take a gallon of this to that much that. And I start, nothing happens. I'm going,'m going oh no i just spent all this money i don't have oh my god what am i going to do so then i start playing with it i start making it smaller amounts smaller amounts and it got to the point where okay my math is not that good so i had to consult some friends and I said, okay, so what is such and such teaspoon compared to this ratio?

And they go, okay, three tablespoons to this to one teaspoon of that. Right. This is where I got really bad. I swear I felt like Beaker with, you know, Professor Melon do. So I'm thinking, okay, I've got this much left of the alcohol, this much left of the powder. Let's make some and as i do that i'm thinking this to myself i pour the alcohol and all of a sudden i got sternum blowing up out of this bowl i'm going oh no and i'm like oh it did work and so i'm like as fast as i can i'm like you can actually handle it so i'm you know trying to cram it into a jar i'm like okay

now i know the formula it's not a. It's literally like three tablespoons of this high potent alcohol with one or two drops of the calcium citrate in just a tiny bit of water. And all of a sudden, it just makes Sterno. That's a very cool skill. I didn't know how to make Sterno. I've used it millions of times in restaurant industry. Never, ever thought to even try to make it it is so expensive now because now they make it where it's like over five dollars for that one little tin and i looked on youtube not youtube on amazon and i got a case of 72

for like 30 bucks i was okay that's still a deal what is that sterno is the liquid fuel gel for um chafing dishes oh yeah fair enough okay yeah yeah and like some of those outdoor fireplaces they use that and it's wonderful because it's harder than heck to put out i mean you can blow on it but it's like napalm And I had a little special thermometer and I got my sternum to be about three to 400 degrees. I mean, it was blue flame. And I went, yeah, mama made fire. Mama made fire. Nice.

I was like, okay, what was the fail? Ended up like, boom. And I thought, why didn't I have the camera on myself as I'm like pouring a little bit of alcohol? And all of a sudden it goes, poof, out of this hole. I'm going, well, that was fun. But even then, Ooh, that alcohol. Wow. You really have to have ventilation because I was still like really woozy going, Oh, gnarly.

I was like, I have to sit down. And so, yeah, that was my, the great sterno of 2024, 2023. At home chemistry, huh? Chemistry experiments at home. Yeah. Dana, can you hear if I read Hatter's comment? Oh, go ahead. Yeah, I love it.

It's great. So one of our listeners in the chat says, The first time I started pressure canning, I did not use the correct amount of water. It was not enough. By the time I realized my mistake, the pressure was so intense in that canner, it looked like a football. Luckily, it did not explode, but I had to buy a new canner. Presto canners are a great product. You know, that is amazing actually for a good product review. I hope you actually put that

on the site. I'm glad no one got hurt. But I couldn't imagine the amount of terror you went through in just a short period of time. Oh, my God. I don't know if I'd be brave enough to grab it if it started swelling and looking like a football. Like, you know, to throw it outside. Oh, I'd be straight running out of that kitchen. I'd be like, Brock. Yeah. You're going to have to.

Because you're getting glass shrapnel and maybe even lid shrapnel from the ball jars. Yikes. Oh, God. That reminds me of a story. Turn off the oven and run. Okay. All right. For the listener that had that story, I've got one.

I know the feeling. I am terrified of those kind of the old-fashioned pressure cookers. And when I was a little kid, we had just moved from Ohio to California. And my mom had gotten one of those old-fashioned pressure cookers, the when I was a little kid, we had just moved from Ohio to California. And my mom had gotten one of those old fashioned pressure cookers, the one that had the little glass tip that would do that little whistle. And we don't know what happened. All I remember was my mom was trying to make a pot of black beans and we're all watching because we're all excited. I mean, we had nothing else to do. Right. And all of a sudden we just see the little plastic thing go boom. And then all of a sudden the whole lid goes boom and brand new kitchen.

We were all covered with first degree burns of black beans everywhere. So yeah, I totally, and it was, yeah, ever since then you will not see this girl doing a pressure cooker like that or an Instapot. I'm'm i'm still scarred i totally understand that you're like i got i got one for you uh and this is a little this is super embarrassing to admit but uh they're the best so when we first like started out the mission i've always been country girl i've always gone to hunting and fishing and and everything and when i published my books they're like oh you're a survivalist what is this stuff so um we got the bags and we're gonna go backpacking right so we can like practice the bug out experience oh yeah and like do it up right so we live in Sacramento, above Sacramento, in this little town called Cool.

And, you know, up in the mountains, it snows and whatnot. So we, it was like Memorial Day weekend or something. It was early. And the snow was all melted at our elevation. But we get up to the camping spot, and it's like snow all over the place. So we camped there the first night and then we're going to walk to the other lake during the next day camp there.

So we walked all day long, lost the trail. We finally had to just go by the primary lake so we can find our way around this thing and it's like snow on top of rocks and our bags are so heavy we're falling through onto the rocks underneath you know trying to navigate all that and we just way over packed our bags like lesson learned it was so heavy and uh just way too much like we were thinking we're like we're car camping but we're just gonna put much. Like, we were thinking we're, like, we're car camping, but we're just going to put all our stuff that we normally put in our car in these bags. And we're going to actually be able to do this.

Yeah. Yeah. And, no. So, we get around to the far side of the lake. The trail that we need to take is, like, 50, you know, meter or yards or whatever up this huge hill. We totally missed it. We're, like, we're just gonna camp here on the lake for the night right well the wind is just whipping it's freezing we are miserable

we just want to go home we know we still have t-bones in the freezer you know oh yeah and so we had our tent set up and so i put brock in the tent and i put on my bikini top and i went out on the beach and there was like this guy out there fishing so i'm like hey like hey can you can you come over here like can you help me out hey you know and he's like oh i got one i'm like, Brock. Or I asked the guy, I'm like, hey, do you mind giving me a ride back across the lake? Like, I'm really not jamming with camping out here and I just want to ride back. Right. And he's like, yeah, no problem. You know, grab your stuff.

Jump my boat. I'm like, all right. Brock, come on. Oh, that's sweet. The look on this guy's face. was so pissed oh i bet we get everything we just wadded it up you know through this dude's boat and he sat brock in the very bow of the boat like in the very front and hit every wave all the way back to the vehicle. We get there, Brock's just drenched, freezing. Hypothermic.

He was not even going to get a pretty girl on the boat alone. I'm like, that was great. Yeah. Thanks for the ride, dude. You know, here's a beer for your troubles. Oh, yeah. Very resourceful, though. Right?

We made it. I don't see anything wrong with that that's phenomenal yeah i was not staying there another night i was like we are out of here right now like we i will figure it out and i did and uh yeah that was a pretty good one jordan i can totally see you doing that all of a sudden chris comes out with a baby. It's like, whoa, wait a minute. Whoa. Right? Yeah, the guy was like, that is absolutely resourceful, though. I wouldn't have thought of doing that.

I like that. Well, you know what else was really smart of the guy was to take the guy and put him in front of him where he could watch him the whole time. Yeah. Because he didn't know you guys from Jack. You know what I mean? Right. Yep. Because he didn't know you guys from Jack. You know what I mean? Right. Yep.

Because he'd already said yes. So it was like, I can't say no now. But, you know, they could have killed him. Sarah and Brock could have killed that guy, took his boat or whatever. So it was smart of him to sit the guy up front. Yeah, that's true. I never thought about that. It wasn't just vindictive.

That's a good call. Yeah, he probably was like, this guy, you know, come get me from behind, maybe. Yeah, I thought he was just being an a-hole. I mean, he may have been, too. He may have been, too. He's been a little bit of both. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I agree with that. Unfortunately, mine isn't like that. Like, I've told mine before, and I have no problem telling it, is mine mishapped with my electric fence. And I turned my electric fence off. So I could have swore I turned it off. And I stepped over, and I caught the right side of my groin. The right of my groin.

Not center mass. I'm lucky I didn't, because this fence was hot enough that it was nearly center mass. Well, then I jump, I go out, and I move, and I catch the left side of my groin. You're like, I'm running out of room. I got out of the fence. I went and flipped the switch because somehow I guess I got it confused during the rainstorm that I had it off instead of on. I remember this day, actually. Yeah.

The headache I had because I think I called you laughing. I just electrocuted myself in the groin twice. Oh, yeah. In the left side. And I'm lucky I just didn't touch myself center mass or that would have just been a horrible, horrible day. That's a great one, though. That is a great one. The wrestling match with the electric fence is great.

My electric fence story is not so... Graphic? We had a big party. We had a big party. Yeah, we had a big party. And even the kids from the carnival that were in town came to our house. It was that big of a party. Wow. And one guy was taking a leak in the back 40 and just peed right on the fence.

Yeah. Oh, man. Oh. That's a great smell. I was going through that. I just heard the screaming. I'm like, electric electric fence watch out for it you know right and that's something it's like i'm used to being around electric fences but i

don't know what happened just that day i let my guard down and it shows you complacency can get you you should treat an electric fence like a loaded like a gun if it's off, you need to treat it like it's on. Because I've found out there are times where certain fences can still hold a charge, even if they're off. Whoa, I didn't know that. How much of a shock was it? Was it like a pretty bad one or was it mild? It was, no. So it was meant for like dogs, sheep. So it was, it wasn't. was it wasn't grounds like if it grounds through you if you create the ground yeah then you get really really shocked it was enough that it gave me a headache yeah oh yeah so it's it was like a you know sticking my finger in an outlet kind of shop

which is funny my friend thought it was like fun to just grab the top one because that's the only one that worked and uh he was like double power and grab the bottom one with the top one and it went you know it made the circuit through him and he was just like i actually have that same solar electric uh. I went and got the battery replaced, and it's sitting on my back porch right now to actually put up. Because the fact it still works this many years later, then it needs to still be. Yeah, that's testament. I feel like this is another ad. Like the Presto canner ad.

So actually, Garden Girl said something in the chat. She goes, it's not as scary, but I got a bunch of boxes of dried goods on clearance at the store. I usually jump in jars and seal or vacuum seal, but just decided to put it in my overstock. Months later, went to get some rice-a-roni out, and it was full of bugs. I took out every box and checked them and sealed properly. Hatter actually made a great comment. Best to freeze for 24 hours your flour and rice too to kill anything that might be in there. Hatter, I'm going to be honest, I've not thought

about doing that because I know rice have bugs in them. I know if you leave them, they'll hatch. I always just immediately vacuum seal them and put them up. So I don't think about sticking them in the freezer because freezer space is so limited in my house. I don't buy anything that would fit in my freezer. You know what I mean? Like 50 pound bag of rice ain't going to fit into my freezer. Unless I take things out. My freezer just went down, but I kind of think it's like a blessing from God because,

um, what are you going to do with all the stuff in the freezer? If you just wake up tomorrow when we're back to steam, it is because we'll see a me. Right. I'll tell you what I would do. I would throw it all in a trash bag and cover it with salt and then twine it up and hang it under the house or in the shed

or something like that and see what survives. I mean, I've got extra jars around and stuff, but that would take a lot of jars to rip a whole cow out of my freezer and start throwing in jars. I was going to say, I i don't have enough jars i do need to get my jars that is who has enough jars have you ever met anyone who has enough jars we did a great uh great job with pickles this year finally the first year since we moved here in 2020 that we really got a full haul and we're able to put pickles back again oh i'm just starting to get jalapenos and bell peppers now after my tornado plant like it's this season has been so rough out here texas hits early like my my peaches come in

in like april may i mean you already have to have stuff planted down by february so it can come to fruition yeah literally so it can like be ripening in may june it's an early growing season here too it's like a i found out i can grow bananas so i that's like one of my end of the world goals is i've always, I love bananas. What about a peppercorn plant? I haven't thought of that, but I want bananas. There's a guy who lives like two hours north of me and he's on YouTube and has a bunch of banana trees. So I'm like, if he can do it, then I can grow freaking bananas.

Jordan, can you do me a favor? Tell Jasmine, I know the issue that she was having with the flour. It's easy for me to like put the flour in the freezer for like overnight. And what I did with my rice was I bought a fresh bag of rice, shook it, making sure there weren't any little critters. But I also bought oxygen absorbers, and I bought the half-gallon jars, and I threw an oxygen absorber, and then I quickly filled it with rice. So that way, if there are eggs or whatever, there's no oxygen once you seal it. Because, yeah, I understand what you guys are talking about. It's hard to put like a 50-pound bag of rice, trying to lift it,

let alone put it in a freezer. But it's hard to put like a 50-pound bag of rice, trying to lift it, let alone put it in a freezer. And I find oxygen absorbers are awesome for that kind of thing. That's one thing I've been learning. Dude I used to train survival with as well, he would put it in Food Safe 5, gal. And put like a paper plate on there and put dry ice in there. And then seal it down so that the dry ice would kill everything before. That's a good idea.

I like that. Nice. I've got an idea because we have a unique set of guests here tonight, and I think this could be highly valuable. It is essentially a fails thing. It is essentially a fails thing. But because of the type of ladies that we have on hand this evening and the state of affairs when it comes to men in general, what if we do your guy's sort of top man fails? In other words, the things that you see men do or not do and go like, oh, wow, you're turning to like a gender thing. Yeah. Well, I would say because. Wait, wait, wait. Are we talking actual cells or weaponized incompetence? Well, that's a that's a that's a really tough call nowadays.

OK, I've got a good one. I've got a good one. Yeah, I think this is very important because there's too much information coming from men about what women like. And I always think that's weird. You know what I mean? Like, go to the source. Like, why would you want a dude's advice about what women like? But anyway, so the opposite end of that would be what are the what are the big fails that fails for men okay yeah so my biggest thing is um i train martial arts like four days a week

five sometimes sometimes twice a day you know um obviously very uh self-defense oriented and whatnot. And then to have these gentlemen who come up in the nicest way and we're like, well, I was in the military for four years, so I know more about martial arts than you do. Oh my God, yes. And I'm like, really? You train like one week a year? Because of my size. Yeah, right'm like, I love when you like, yeah. You train like one week. Yeah. Right.

That it's like, really? Okay. You train like one week a year. I've been training for over 20 years. You know, I ran into it a lot being in construction of being treated. Like I know less just because of my gender and my size.

Right. Yeah. I, I am a very small woman sarah is my height too we're both very small women so people look at us and and what kills me is when y'all know me y'all know my personality they think i'm passive they quickly figure out i'm not man oh yeah so what do we call that underestimating or or it's not necessarily yeah but that's not what it is what it is right and i was about to say that is i've i've had that work to my advantage too because if you play dumb then they don't realize how smart you really are

and you can use that to an even upper hand right yep because if i don't have to strain my back carrying something and they want to help me reach something on the top show please by all means do it for me i need six of those down can you get those for me oh thank you so much oh my god so i would say that um one more thing that i kind of notice is too many chiefs, maybe not enough Indians as far as like we you know, you ask about what kind of system would you set up for your survival community? And it always has to be like one person. Oh, and i agree that it has to be one person making quick calls right yeah there's so much that happens in a community underneath uh that one person that needs little leaders you know those little chieftains right and instead of like um we're just gonna have you know one person take control of all

hierarchy of duties and such yeah that it's like you know you gotta think about all those things that happen underneath it because not everybody's gonna be out there with their ar and uh you know hitting the front line with you and you gotta have that structure supporting you or you can't go hit that line you don't have food and you don't have hygiene and you don't have a lot of really important things so i think um one of the biggest realizations that i made was that everybody is purposeful in a survival community even if it's just for lifting the big things or doing those things you know everybody has even if it's someone just for watching the children yeah yeah it's the same way for us like me and chris we have talked about it on my friends who are in our prepper plans or

survival plans we already have roles of what we are capable of doing and what we need people for and there are uses for every individual yeah okay i like so too many chiefs yeah yeah you know that a lot of times it's uh like jimmy knows best or whatever yeah yeah yeah yeah it's i i get that but you're gonna you that's what this is for you know like with our families we run our own our own system right we have our own way we work in our own little mini community is how i see our our little families right so we run into fails so uh like i run it we've ran into fails with prepper camp several years in a row or going camping several years in a row and leaving the propane for the cooker out

so chris had gotten it out which is not all his fault because i'm the one who packed the car i'm the one who played tetris and twice twice, in two separate camping trips, all of the propane tanks were sitting at home in the living room. Oh, my gosh. Now there is a system of, okay, this is a list of everything we have, and this is what has to be checked off as it goes into the car. Because it was getting, we have plenty of propane now but running into that issue of forgetting things is is a simple fail that everybody does notorious

for leaving and be like i know i forgot something i'm not sure what i forgot then 20 miles down the road we didn't we didn't realize we didn't have it until we were setting up camp oh my gosh see we do a list with check boxes ours would be like oh we forgot to put it on the list

there's always a way things could go awry but I am my biggest pro There you go. Yeah. I mean, there's always a, yeah, there's always a way things could go awry. But I am, I am my biggest pro and con as far as prepping positives and fails is I tend to sometimes become a control freak and how I want things done as far as like packing for camping trips, how I want things set out, which can be a a great thing but can also really hurt us because again it it causes us because i just want to get it go ahead and get it done we could end up overlooking something very true i get that we haven't heard from you lisa what about uh what about your take on men's fails in this modern age? Well, I'm the only single one,

I guess. I feel like you guys, I feel like you guys are being very nice and holding back. I'm going to be honest with all three of you. I feel like there's a lot of things that we do this day and age. And you're like, Oh God, what the fuck is that you know what i

mean i personally have a uh don't know any girls like that you know what i have one she ran away i have one man so i can say is i love my partner but he has drank before my tincture vodka not knowing i was using it for that's a good one do not leave out items that you plan to use for something else if you don't want someone else to drink it or get their hands on it so between both of us no um I think that in the preparedness community, there are so many what I call sheepdogs. And these are the most valuable men in the world because they are the barrier between the wolves and the actual sheep. Oh, absolutely. Right? Absolutely.

So many of the gentlemen within the preparedness community, when the rubber hits the road, they care about community. They want to protect their community. They're worried about sustaining their community and so I think we're just blessed with a really great um community obviously group of people but I most of the men are that way it's just some of uh what I've noticed maybe like out of the military that get a little high and mighty on themselves and then tend to like look down on other people those would be yeah i agree with you i've run into that i've only seen a few men in like the prepping group that i find like i don't want to be around them yeah right exactly i think what i would see and it's not to

be pointed to all men because i have an amazing partner. I know you have an amazing partner. You know, my, we have fails, but it usually comes to fails of lack of communication. A team screwed up. Right. It wasn't just one person. It was both parties. But I think what I run into when I run into fails, I see as men who prep, and this is going to sound harsh is they tend to be a bit chauvinistic or misogynistic. And then that's less understanding of your, the women in the community being able to be as strong as the men. And my partner gives me that equality of saying I'm he, well, rephrase equality to a point because there is a point where he is physically stronger than me and more capable of things than I am. i am only a five foot two

woman and i have certain skills that he doesn't so it's knowing where i where my my strengths and my weaknesses are and him knowing that too and then him being that protector who's going to protect me and our offspring and so those are great traits to have but yes anytime i see fails in men in the prepping community it tends to to be, like you said, those overzealous men who are too self-entitled and tend to be misogynistic or chauvinistic at times. Yeah. And I think it's a defense mechanism. Oh, I agree. Because they're a threat.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. I have a hard time understanding that a female could be that powerful as well, a leader of leaders. I like that. Wow, I can't even contribute to that. There definitely is that tendency, though, particularly, and this might rub some people the wrong way, but it's just where I see it. In the Christian prepper sort of contingent, where I do see an overemphasis on roles and responsibilities. This is what the men do. This is what the women do.

And you cannot deviate from that. You know what I mean? I've met people like technically women are just breeders and home workers. And it just, ugh. It just rubs me. They don't want to talk to me. Yeah, it's a tough one. It's a tough one because I don't mean, you know, I understand their position.

They're reading the Bible a lot more than me. And I guess the Bible says it. But at the same time, it's like our world is not built like that like there's the old testament brings it and then jesus brought us a new covenant so oh there you go right oh okay i have to jump in and patter says without my wife by my side i'd fill out everything at the homestead that's the that's what i'm talking about okay i have a question which one of our hosts was the one that they had the chickens is it draven rock and oh yeah she tells them oh that did the chicken series yeah where she was saying okay we got too many chickens honey can you go kill a couple chickens he goes can i use my bow and arrow she's like yeah sure an hour later

she goes outside she's like where's the chickens and she just sees nothing but arrows all those arrows are gone and he's like those things are fast that's one of my all-time favorites he fails and then she just picks up a chicken whack andack. And I'm like, yep, there you go. I love that. It taught me, yeah, I don't think I can handle a chicken, let alone having to kill it. I'd be doing it like him. It's not going to be cool.

You just hang them by their feet and slit their throat and they're good. Or you grab them by their head and just windmill your arm and it'll sling its body right from its head. Oh, God. I could not handle that. So I'm out practicing my bow, right, with my neighbor. We're shooting bows. And we got field tips on.

We're just practice shooting. And they had this rooster. It was, like, knee high. And that thing was mean. Oh, they're mean, those little bastards big bruises on your legs like a big red one and so as we're practice shooting the rooster goes by boop boop boop in front of the hay bale and we're like okay light him up yeah right And then he goes walking back by again. It doesn't like a moving target. Yeah, and it was like, this is it, man.

So, boom. Shot it right in the leg, and he's like, with the arrow coming out of his leg. So my neighbor was like, oh, no. I bet he brushed that off. Right? Did he brush it off? No, no.

Oh, no, he was down? He was down like my balkan and then like the leg was kind of messed up so uh so dave grabs him by his head it was my neighbor dave not but anyway so he grabs my his head swings that chicken around boom puts him in the bag puts him in the barn done right mom you don't have to worry about that rooster no more and she's like she comes running out the barn after like 15 minutes she's like it's still alive oh god no no it's just having like it's just nerves right it right yeah she's like so she brings it out and empties out the bag and here's a chicken like like zombie chicken oh no dude just like the legs now hurt the neck half neck broken

hey that allison chain song is legit i'm telling you them roosters are hard right they're hardy man they are so he ended up yeah um actually beating its head into the ground but oh bless it if you if you grab it you know i've had that happen where i was working chicken houses to put myself through welding school and uh the previous people who were supposed to do the maintenance came up and he was like oh this is how you kill a chicken and he went to and he's this poor chicken was lame. So, you know, you have to put him down when you have him in hundreds of chickens in these houses. Right.

And he went to do it, and he's just swinging and swinging and swinging, and he can't get this chicken's neck to break. And the chicken's suffering, and I get so mad that I grabbed the chicken out of his hand, I grabbed the head and the body, yank it apart, and said, here. And I fling him right back at him i was so mad i'm like kill the chicken don't torture the chicken yeah yeah but i can tell you a fell that could have cost me my life so i was with a friend and we were butchering um sheep and pigs and you know how they have the the leg spreaders the for you hang the tendons on each of the corners yeah at the hangers to hang them on

yeah well her husband had accidentally cut through the tendon and we had already dressed this hog down it was just cut in half you know we were to the point where we're getting ready to salt in half it was going to crush you no the entire side of that hanger with the full weight of the fork hit you right in the temple oh and the first thing i thought is i'm gonna die because it hit me right in the zygomatic process which is a dangerous spot to receive trauma in and i went it went black for a minute i'm like i'm dead i literally thought to myself i'm dead so that's it's just one of those proper things now that it was a freak accident but it's something so easily could happen that it's made me more vigilant to where i'm standing when something's going on because it's so easy for something so minor to easily be fatal for sure

well come on james don't you have anything i'm trying to think of some other i've got plenty oh i've got i'll tell you the wood pile fails fails so when i when i first bought our house and we moved in and all that kind of stuff i was like not even really a prepper yet but i was just getting into stuff getting my hands dirty and one of the first things i i did was started to learn how to use an axe and split wood and i split all this wood and i was and we have a you know a fireplace and i was like oh this is gonna be sweet i'm gonna be slick and i'm gonna put a pallet on my porch and i'm gonna put all the wood on my porch and i showed my wife and i was like look baby if it snows we're good we'll just come right out here get the wood on my porch and i showed my wife and i was like look baby if it snows we're good

we'll just come right out here get the wood right off the porch because we got like a nice porch you know and uh that spring i don't remember who who did i think i think my wife did it one of us reached our hand onto like one of the main posts of the porch, and it just fell detached right off. Termites from the wood I had split had eaten right through the entire support pillar. So we've had to rebuild the whole porch. But then, so you think I would learn my lesson, right? Last year, I'm getting slick again. All right, look, I'm going to put the wood piles down at the bottom of the back steps.

And that way, you know, I can come down the steps, grab the firewood, take it up, whatever, you know. If they eat through the wood fence, whatever. If termites eat through the wood fence, that's an easy fix. It's a lot easier than rebuilding a porch. One night I'm sitting down out back on the back steps with my dogs, and my wife's pulling in. She gets out of the car. My one dog runs to the gate to see her.

I didn't even see it. It was so dark out. He gets bit by a copperhead that I'm sure was living in the wood piles that i put right there is that how the dog got bitten oh well yeah i mean i'm assuming i'm assuming but yeah so whatever i try to get so now it's just put the wood in the back of the yard and go get it what get it before this big storm or get you know get it when you need it because every time I try to get slick with piles of wood, I pay for it dearly. Yeah, the first year we grew corn,

we finally figured it out. You got to do it in blocks. You can't do it in rows. You need it to cross-pollinate each other. You need some good seed stock. Fertilizer, yeah. Yeah, to really make it happen. You know, so we finally get like a big haul of corn and we are stoked.

And, um, we hot water bathed it all. Wow. We didn't pressure can it. Oh no. Oh no. it oh no so it's sitting on the shelf in the shed and we go out there and it just blubble bubbling away oh no our whole harvest so that's when we figured out we definitely need pressure canning and what i did because i was so bummed is i spread it all out on cookie sheets and i dried it in the california sun and then i fed it to the pigs i don't blame you that's

what i was gonna ask because like when i have leftover food or um leftover even baby jars like once he's done eating all of that goes to the chickens the chickens are an amazing resource just like pigs are except you can't free chickens uh radishes really they're toxic to chickens oh man i've seen i've seen my chickens eat radishes before on their own accord. The problem I'm having with my chickens here is I only have three of them, which is fine. They produce well for our house. I'm getting ready to expand all that, but I only have three right now. And so I'm used to feeding my chickens like tons of scraps because we had like 170 chickens when we left California. Yeah, because we were like selling eggs to all the feed stores and whatnot.

And so I was like taking my scraps up there and keep taking my scraps up there. The chickens are overwhelmed. They don't like to eat that much and when it's hot, as hot as it is, right? And then we got field mice. Oh, yeah.

And they're just everywhere. See, I miss having my chickens to eat the mice like that was they do their food gets filled up with the mouse poop i'm always like i train my dogs to be able to chase the mice down my one dog will just eat them um i try not to let her eat it but like she does and my my german shepherd will actually like spit it out for me, you know, so I can kill it and whatnot. But, uh, yeah, it's just constant problems with the mice. So now I don't want to feed them too much scraps that they can't consume in

one setting. Do you compost it? Because that is one great thing about food is you can throw it straight into a compost. Yeah. I'm going to read Garden Girls comment real quick because here's I think would be a man film. As I used to do home remodeling with my dad, we were on a job. He marked the tiles and I cut them. He yelled at me that I was cutting them wrong.

I told him I was following the line. He got mad again and told me I was fired. But I said, I quit. I walked five miles home. them wrong i told him i was following the line he got mad again and told me i was fired but i said i quit i walked five miles home next morning he knocks on my door tuck and tell to tell me that the tile saw was out of alignment oh no oh you know i've had a film where sometimes other people's best intentions are the worst thing because i had someone who thought, we'll just say my ex-husband thought he was helping me. And he threw down seed barrier right after I had just planted all of my seeds. No.

Yeah. Yeah, so it was meant to stop weed growth, but it was one of those types of seed barriers that can affect a lot of different plants, especially like tomatoes, that I had to reseed my entire garden because nothing was going to sprout. Okay, well, on that one, I know not personally of a man fail that I've seen, there is a guy on YouTube that he talks about, hey, you can make a Zeripod and you can, like, if you lose power, you can make your own refrigerator and it's cold enough, it'll keep milk warm. So I sat there and that was the year I decided I was going to learn how to make a Zeripod and I could prove that guy wrong. He was so off on the temperature. And I thought that's dangerous for people that if they want to prep and they're following this guy's advice, not only does your pot, it can barely keep like a one bottle of water cold, let alone milk or, or like eggs. It's useless. And the guy talks about how, oh, you can keep milk in this and this something you know you're gonna poison people yeah that i find horrible that he's just giving bad advice and

and have you ever seen that video with uh with rick where he was on that the daily show or whatever oh yeah that's so good the ninja prepper guy? Yeah. No. Oh, you got to see it. Yeah, I'll send it to you. Yeah, that's phenomenal. Funny, dude. So funny. And the lady. Rick with the lady, too, was hilarious.

Yeah. It was the same segment, remember? And he's, like, emptying her bag out of crap, trash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He'll get you killed. In the poncho. Yeah. In the caviar and stuff.

I'm going to find it. What's it called? You realize they're going to look this up. I'll put it in the chat. All right, if you got it. It's in his sign. I mean, uh email signature always had her put a comment about his chicken and she had a massive egg and she couldn't wait she was

egg bound and unfortunately that is just one of those things that occasionally happen um i don't think it's necessarily the feeding it is just something with her. It could have been. Right. I was going to say it could have just been the breeding. Some chickens are bred to lay eggs a certain way that they will have larger eggs than normal. And they will become egg bound. And even when you soak them and massage them and try to, sometimes there's no just saving them. So I hate that you lost your chicken that way.

But it is a hard lesson to learn. The ones we got from Tractor Supply, we lost like two of the six with egg bound like that. Right. It's because of the breeding. My best chickens I ever got, I got my my orphan tins from a personal farmer and all my other ones as well here I got mine from tractor supply so we'll see how they'll do but we've got 11 chicks or 11 hens they should start laying soon and uh three of them are going to be cold for the freezer I've already picked out which three I got a good fail for you so oh we moved to texas we're gonna we finally like we

went a year without chickens but i had to have my chickens back you know so oh yeah we we get a chicken coop made and we're going to tractor supply to pick out the chickens and we get six picked out and brock's like oh i want the white one i'm like well the white one i don't want the white one he's like i want the white one. I'm like, well, I'll go with the white one. I don't want the white one. He's like, I want the white one. Get the white one, too. All right, fine. We'll get the white one, too. Seven.

And bring them home. Start feeding everybody. You know, everything's all good. Well, this white chicken. Oh, no. She just starts bulking up. And, like, she's using her wings to like walk around now she's just so rude to everybody she's a meat bird or something she was a meat bird yeah we were calling her

cankles oh bless her ankles were so big like bred. Right. They're bred to get so big that their legs can't support their body. Yeah, those meat birds are crazy. She was literally having to use her wings. Oh, my God. So we finally had cankles for Christmas dinner. But, yeah, that bird peeled so easy. Another one that we had that was that way, we tried to do Cornish hens. And we didn't realize that Cornish hens only take like six weeks to get ready to go.

Really? Yeah. And we were like keeping them alive like normal chickens, right? Like five months old. Yeah. One would just sit there like flopping his head back and forth from the food to the water. And it was literally growing out of its skin. Whoa.

Oh, my God. Yeah. Like, it was so fat, its skin was starting to split. We're like, oh, we got to kill these birds, right? They're the fattest Cornish hens you've ever had, ever. I miss cankles. Delicious. Oh, cankles?

Okay. So that was another fail. So we killed cankles, so that was another fail so um we killed cankles and we ate her immediately oh you have to let it sit like you do beef yep exactly because of the rigor mortis i got a great uh i got a great chicken fail it was it was a rough one i have a picture of my son holding the first egg we ever got and it was like you know the crowning moment like we got the chickens we went through all that we got them as chicks raised them up brought them outside followed all the steps we got the first egg and i'm like shit man now we're getting eggs now. Like, we've done it. And we put all the birds in the coop, go to sleep. I wake up to see, you know, how many eggs I got the next morning

and massacre in the coop. Every chicken. I left one of the roosting boxes unhooked. And almost like it knew, some raccoon or possum came through and just destroyed everything killed all yeah it was you know i had it was crazy with my rabbits when i used to breed my fiber rabbits and i it's a two-parter so i my fail was allowing people to see the kits after they were born because kits are adorable but every intention was for those kits to go into the freezer i was then stuck trying to rehome a bunch of rabbits

because they wouldn't let you kill them live with the thought of me putting them in the freezer to eat them and that's what they were bred for was they were meant for fiber but they were well enough fed that they're delicious like i've eaten delicious right but now the biggest fail i ran into and it was a it was a learning it wasn't necessarily a fail it was a learning experience is that coyotes can rip through wire without a second thought that they ripped out two of my rabbits straight from the bottom of their pen oh wow yeah so knowing with coyotes if you're going to have rabbits reinforce it um as much as possible i actually found the corrugated still i ended up putting that around and had less issues but coyotes can tear through metal like it's nothing yeah wow yeah we had a bear going after our um coop. And so what we did was we did a board with tons of nails nailed through it.

And then put that up at the, weaved it into the top of the fencing. So when it went to grab the fencing, it would put its hands on that board and get stuck. Yeah, and it worked. Lisa sounds like she's regretting this show now at the tail end of that it's just it's just evolved into murder stories i apologize my dog is going nuts yeah i could never be a homesteader i'd be crying i gotta kill a little funny fun boy no oh yeah and i see i've had a bird i've had a bird oh a rabbit who broke her neck. It's one of those things you just put them down.

I don't, I guess for me who's grown up eating them, it's not a second thought to kill them. Yes. I mean, hunting, fishing and whatnot, that's part of it. I love hunting. I love fishing. That's how it goes. Good gardening. Well, look, Daveones said it best he said if if you don't if you're uncomfortable with taking something's head off you need to find somebody

who will cut heads off for you yes remember it was quoted it was like quote of the year and willow willow heard that and Willow said that's why she has me. There you go. You're the head lopper. All right. I have no quarrels about it. I won't say bad. It's actually my preferred method, really.

The lopping off of the head is how I do the chickens. There's no hanging. Grab them by the neck, lay it on the wood, and use like a little tactical hatchet super sharp head off done so a really good clay knife will do the same thing quick yeah yeah it's it's the easiest way i found but anyway away from murder and death and on to gardening go ahead sarah i'm sorry well one of my one of my survival quotes uh gentleman told me that sticks with me is like you better learn to eat the birds or you're going to eat what the birds eat. Oh, I love that.

Oh. Yeah, that's nice. Yep. Yeah, I like that a lot. There's definitely truth in that nugget for sure. Right. Okay, so I'm definitely, like, with Phil and Gillian, I could never be a killer. We're going to be city preppers.

Good luck with that. I could never be a killer. We're going to be city preppers. Good luck with that. You'll find somebody who can do the dirty work for you. Yeah, fair enough. You raise the birds. I have a voice crush on Judson, so hopefully he can do it for me. Oh, there you go. I'm sure he's no stranger. So one of my most epic garden fails

Wasn't really our fault though I'm just saying That's what they all say We had grown the small patch of potatoes It hit so good So good So many potatoes So the next year

We expanded our potatoes Right We got a whole big old section potatoes. Well, the next year, we expanded our potatoes, right? We got a whole big old section of them now. You're like, we're going to have sacks full. Right, right. Because we just made it through all last winter, so now we're going to try and help supply three households and just going for it.

Well, my father-in-law went Captain Ahab trying to find another well site and just kept drilling up the property trying to find another well site and just kept drilling up the property trying to find another well site. Captain Ahab. We go to dig the potatoes out and

all of the gophers had run away from the vibration. No. Right into our potatoes. They took like one bite out of every single potato that was in the ground yep i just sat there i literally cried yeah so that's where i learned my my garden fell was learning in mississippi we had pot worms really bad and the reason why i got where i

preferred container gardening was because one year i had great carrots pulled them out put them in the fridge for a day right was getting ready and fucking uh pardon my language beetles were crawling out of my carrots they had board and all of my root vegetables so i then went to you can't always container garden i'm just saying no no you're talking i'm going to feed my family for the year you're not freaking container right but no no no i couldn't do everything container garden but i learned i could do my root vegetables container garden and i did everything else in the ground yeah i don't know like if you're gonna grow enough potatoes to feed your family and possibly a group of 13 people.

So I use molasses containers and it actually works really great. It's going to be a ton of them. I right now, I actually had four. I mean, yes, it's going to need more. But if you've got to really consider what your soil is like and how it'll handle. And unfortunately, I could grow root vegetables. So I had to throw them in containers and i used giant molasses containers from the co-op and i would grow all

of them in there now i tried the tires and i'm going to tell you right now if you ever grow in tires be forewarned mice will nest in there they loved it when i had the sweet potatoes i use molasses containers because there's no space for them to crawl into. The only thing you have to watch out for is ants and there are plenty of things you can do to minimize the ants and mice won't stay in those containers. Yeah, we got tons of ants

too. Did you see Hatter's comment on there? Before we bought our house? Yeah. We had a huge garden in the back of the apartment. The owner had to mention while mowing the lawn, he ran over the whole garden. Oh, Jesus.

Oh, man, that's so bad. These are salad. These are salad. Oh, no. That's hilarious. These are crazy looking weeds. Oh, man. That's rough.

Yeah. You see how much of an avalanche it is, though? Once you really get the thing primed and start realizing all the things you've done wrong and what it's taken to get here. It's crazy. And it's still a learning method i mean we're still making doing daily sales on the regular i couldn't tell you the number of times i've probably done something stupid out of just pure uh just negligence it was like really i can't believe i just did that exactly or did something good like we accidentally

left our wine way too long that we were making now we got some grape vinegar i mean there you go there you go yeah it's just you know what it is it's because there's a defining quality amongst preppers who get anywhere in prepping and it's it's uh relentlessness it's like i'm gonna keep going i'm gonna keep planning i'm gonna keep shooting i'm gonna keep doing these things even though i screw up you don't and you don't let it get you down like i there are things we do that cause it and natural events that cause it like the hurricane or that tropical storm Barry that hit my garden was under feet of water. I remember posting that when I had my other podcast. Oh, yeah.

But I still kept going. So I think preppers have a level of resilience and persistence that normal people just don't have. I'm not saying they don't have it. They don't have it at the same level or scope that we do. Yeah. Or they just don't get it. Or they're not ready. Or they just need to throw in the towel that's it i was literally thinking that exact same thing and i refuse to i put in too much work

to see it fail now just like my sewing machine has given me issues it's ridiculous but i refuse to give up just because of this i'm not going to stop my projects or my dump bags because of it right well i've uh my thing is that i almost had a fail was you know i come out here and i start canning and before i knew it i suddenly was tripping over jars in the living room and i'm like what the heck so out of desperation i what happens i end up going to a restore and now it's file cabinets it's like the i'm so glad that was like okay i walked in got myself a stupid file cabinet and now it's my go-to and every time i show up at the restore they're like nope we don't have any more file cabinets hey how's the cannon coming along i'm like oh

it's coming along right and it's like it's gonna be my go-to from now on because i don't care my apartment doesn't look like an apartment it looks like an office but you know what it's one heck of a pantry and and where the you have to think outside the box otherwise i could have sat there and said oh my god i i'm not gonna can anymore because i'm tripping over these jars. I'm like, no, screw that. I'm going to use – sorry about that. That's my dog. Yeah, I just decided Jackie Chan it, and now I've got five cabinets. Yeah, I remember you telling me that story.

Well, I think – go ahead, Lisa. Oh, sorry about that. My dog just – every time I get on the phone, he does this. He needs a podcast I think the the whole thing about living in 120 square feet I've become claustrophobic and I was wanting to be in a tiny home but those are like 79 feet no I could not do it the only thing I found for myself is like that's helped me with my preps is that everything has to have at least dual duty. So when I was trying to figure out what am I going to do with all these blasted jars? Oh, my gosh.

How am I going to storm? And I saw the foul cabins. I made sure, you know what? I could definitely put these in a basement later on. Okay, dual duty. Here we go. And heck, yeah. Yeah, you learn from it all, you know.

Yeah. There's no doubt about it. That's what I think makes this a little different from other people's that if we're going to survive whatever's coming, you have to think outside the box. You have to go, okay, what can happen this real? Outside the box, you have to go, okay, what can happen this – real, roll with the punches, to quote Jordan in her recent episode of – you got to take it and just go, okay, here we go, here we go. We couldn't kill the chickens, and so Kangles became dinner. There you go. But you learn, oh, next time, don't do that with that kind of chicken kind of a thing.

Okay, next time you have so many jars, make sure you have a file cabinet to put them in kind of a thing. Well, you guys were awesome. This was a great idea, Lisa. Thank you, Sarah and Jordan, for joining us tonight also. Yeah, absolutely. Thanks for having us. Oh, yeah. If you guys are out there and you have fails that you'd like to share, please. We would love to laugh at you on air.

So please send them to us because I would gladly read them. I think it's tremendous, particularly for new preppers and old preppers. I think it's so important for people to bear their soft parts because it's great. You go, oh, these people are human. All right, well, I think that's about it. We'll see you on the flip side, PBN family. Thanks so much. Epic Preppers Live.

We will talk soon. See you guys. Bye. What if I told you you could own land for $200 down and highly affordable monthly payments? Yourcheapland.com is your answer to bug out land, hunting, recreation, and whatever else your prepper mind can dream up. Yourcheapland.com has properties in Texas, New Mexico, Colorado, Oklahoma, Arizona, Utah. Go to yourcheapland.com, check out the properties, use the promo code PBN, and get $100 off your purchase.