The Prepper Broadcasting Network - Steven Menking on I AM Liberty

Episode Date: June 6, 2024

God bless the Menking Family! @PBNLinks | Linktree

you're listening to pbm your path back to stability we've had this entire year and so it's all it's all that sort of stuff but it also taught me that you know sometimes it is easier to be sick than it is to be the only healthy person in a house full of sick people um you know not that i would to be sick than it is to be the only healthy person in a house full of sick people. You know, not that I would rather be sick than healthy, but it's a different, it's a different set of problems, right? So, you know, now, now everything, everything falls and, and every conversation that you have is about what, about what's going, what's going wrong, just because it's something that's acute and something that's in front of you and you know if if you're in that mode at any point when you don't have to

be it's just so draining to you from your energy standpoint like we're we're so grateful that our kids are good sleepers and so you know it's not like they're waking up in the middle of the night because of this stuff. But on the bad days and something like that, everybody pops off the pillow and just starts running around and fussing and nothing really working and all the rest of it. And it stinks because they want to run around and play outside, but they can't. They want to go places. They can't. All that sort of stuff.

But interesting lessons as always. remind myself that even if a positive attitude I have isn't going to right the ship, like go from go from zero to 100 or something like that in terms of percent satisfaction of the people around me, I need to I need to do a little bit more, particularly when I'm in that kind of a situation to speak an encouraging word and to mostly avoid getting frustrated myself because I can, I can sort of bottle that frustration a bit, but not really well, like not well enough to fool my wife. That's for sure. Cause it'll be like, you know, you gotta, I gotta, I gotta tighten up, tighten up the attitude a little bit. And you know, it's not like I'm feeling sorry for myself in this thing. It's just like, I, I just desperately want to want to get stuff done. And I'm the kind of person

that, you know, I think I had 30 unread emails across my, across my inboxes. And that's like a five, five to 10 year personal record for me in terms of high number. And so I was just like, oh, I gotta, I gotta get back to the stuff. But it's a priorities thing. Certain things can get pushed. I can apologize to people in an email. People understand that kids are sick. And I certainly don't pull that card out of the deck all that often. But it's good to be here talking to you, man. And you know how it is. It's good to be here talking to you, man. And, you know, you know how it is.

Oh, yeah, all about it. Been there in almost every facet that you're talking about, you know, particularly that last one, that running dry of patience and all that kind of stuff. That's just, you know, that's what the deal is. Well, I'll tell you something else about that, James. And, you know, as a because I'm a private tutor for work and because I love what I what I do, what usually happens for me is if there's a proper balance between the work and the family, my general battery of resources of patience and kindness and all the rest of that. If I'm, if I'm tutoring for a certain amount of time, you know, I could be tutoring almost all day and then still have a full battery for the family. And that's a function I think of me being blessed to be in a position to love what I do. But if I'm doing one of them, doing one of those two things, and it's a struggle and it's just that one thing and there's not that there's not that balance then that battery that singular battery

does get drained so I'm learning more about myself that and I knew this before but I'm learning it more acutely that you know if I'm not able to be as productive on the work front that really does gnaw at me a little bit. And, you know, I don't think that's a bad tendency. It's just something that is built into the way I'm made up. And I have to understand that to keep it in check and not let that spill over because I want, you know, I want as much voltage on all of those batteries as I can. So just got to be sensitive to that sort of thing. How do you spend your, if you have it, like your alone time?

Are you an alone time kind of guy? You seem like you have that. Yeah. Here's what I would love to be doing if I had alone time. I would love to play doing if I, you know, had, had alone time, I would love to, uh, you know, play some golf, but then mostly my alone time is when everybody else goes to sleep. And, you know, maybe in a couple of years, that's going to switch when I, when I actually grow up and realize that I need a little bit more sleep than I'm currently getting, that my alone time should be first thing, first thing in the morning before people get up and that that'll be healthier. I know that that's a change that I'll eventually make, but, you know, we're talking, uh, we're

talking reading books, we're talking, um, uh, you know, trying to do some generalized research because, you know, when I'm, when I'm with my family or when I'm with my students, I'm in that kind of flow state. I'm a hundred percent focused on that as, as best as I can be. You know, I, I'm in that kind of flow state. I'm a hundred percent focused on that as, as best as I can be. You know, I, I, I'm not perfect. I'm not perfect in that regard, but that's the, that's the alone time. Um, during the day, if I can get it, it's, it's golfing or reading on the, reading on the porch, but you know, I'm also, I also am who I am. So I'll go through phases where I, you know, play some video games and stuff like that. I don't necessarily need to be doing that, but I give myself a little bit of a pass.

But I've got to get back into a season where I'm making more use, more productive use of that alone time where I'm not focused on work or any of the self-help sort of stuff, and I'm just taking more time to pray, to be in the Word and everything else like that. I'm certainly not perfect in that regard, but I try to stick to that routine. But yeah, I've always been introverted, and I appreciate the quiet. I appreciate the calm. I appreciate the calm. I like that. I like to think through things as much as I can without getting too bogged down. But I'm always trying to learn something new either about the world or about myself.

And sometimes it takes some quiet around you to be in a mindset where you can actually get that kind of stuff done. Yeah, I've got some pretty good yields and i've figured out parsed out kind of what to do with that alone time for me and and the best things seem to be and and you know there's i don't know that anybody's gonna really dig into this show where the direction is going and i don't care at all so we're gonna keep heading in this direction because this is an important topic to me and clearly important to you um but there's you brought up the fact of alone time at night when everyone's asleep and that's an alone time there's like you also talked about the alone time when everybody's asleep and you wake up early.

But, man, for me, there's there's the alone time. And this is even harder for you, I imagine, because you have three kids when everyone's gone. That's a whole different spectrum of alone time for me. Like when everyone is gone gone it's i don't know why i think it's because all options are available it's like if i want to play video games i'll do that if i want to watch an entire three-hour movie or something like that uninterrupted that's part of it right that uninterrupted like literally like when the family is gone then it's like there is no possibility for interruption and as a writer

that's a big deal sometimes you know when you're working your way through fiction or something along those lines it's like you get start to go into this hole and if the possibility for interruption exists you can't get down deep enough you know but if it's like 4 a.m i'm up i know i got like three hours before anybody stirs then i can go down into that hole but uh any in any way so that kind of solitude's a different thing for sure when everyone's gone it just i years, I've come to realize that this is a different form of powering up. You know what I mean? Like the late night stuff, you get a little bit of a charge. The early morning stuff, I think you do.

Like you said, I think you do get a better charge. But when they're gone, it sounds terrible, but it is what it is. You get the – like you get powered up like a nuclear reactor. No, it's very true, James. And it's also the kind of thing that at the same time of that, there's this bifurcation of people experiencing this kind of profound existential loneliness that's there. And this is where faith comes in, uh, in a, in a variety of different aspects, but you're absolutely right. Oftentimes I'll be, I'll be thinking really hard about something, even sort of spontaneously, even, even in times

when people are around and I'll get interrupted for, for something. And it takes, you know, for something and it takes, you know, it takes some restraint for me to not really express the idea that that interruption was not like, it was a non-trivial interruption of a thought process. Like you're absolutely right in terms of getting like really underneath stuff or really picturing something or hitting that kind of breakthrough. Like if I, I would not be able to produce any, you know, any like long form written, written output in the, in the current, in the current environment, I would have to change my routine to have people out of the house. Cause there's a big difference between having people watching your kids while you're, while you're working or while you're spending some time versus being in that, uh, in that really quiet place. And, you know, the best, the, the cognitive

scientists now say that the best thing for getting information from your short-term memory to your long-term memory is periods of intense focus followed by periods of not mindless activity, uh, but either extreme, uh, extreme relaxation or just a, a non-focus sort of autopilot kind of state. So if you're, if you're thinking really hard about a particular idea, you're like really locked in it for, for an hour, then to recharge it and to get your brain to just keep working on it a little bit in the background without sapping your battery and you're going to take out the trash or do the dishes or do something around the house or go for a drive where it's not quite that same degree of focus. It's that kind of cycle that will allow you to have more of those, to sustain that intense

focus over a longer period. And that's really only possible without, um, without interruptions. Now in today's day and age, obviously, even if everyone's gone, I can't even remember a time when I would have a full three hour block in the middle of the day to do, uh, to do whatever. Um, but yeah, it'll happen it'll it'll happen again you gotta gotta figure out it'll definitely figure out what's there but uh i have a kid who can easily disappear for three hours now you know what i mean and and he's happy to do so you know it's it's come to that age yeah no it's good and obviously you know for for emergencies we have to keep the keep the lines of communication open but you know yeah it's a it's a it's a precious it's a precious

time when you have that um and i guess it would be difficult for someone who you know isn't a father or a husband or have these like really close ties and responsibilities, I think, to understand in quite the same way, because it it is also a double edged sword. Like you can't be in that you can't be in that place 24, 24, seven, because part of what we're made for is serving serving other people as well. But, you expend yourself in the service of those that you love to build them up, you need to have those spots to just get underneath something, to let something come to the surface, to have some sort of realization. And you don't even have to work too hard at it.

have some sort of realization and you don't even have to work too hard at it. It'll come, it'll come spontaneously as long as you're not, you know, let's say unnecessarily distracting yourself or, you know, tamping it down or other things like that. Like there's, there's plenty of ideas and conclusions and inspiration and creativity and reflections and everything that is inside of us that we're processing all the time, maybe not even consciously. And it's in those quiet moments where if we'll allow that to come to the surface, if we invite that to come to the surface, if we're sort of prayerful in those moments, that we'll get that kind of insight. I mean, one way I like to think about it, James, maybe we've talked about

this before, but maybe we haven't. So let's say a PhD that people work towards in the humanities or other fields, maybe it's five to seven years worth of work. So that means that maybe twice a decade, if we're doing this right, we should get the equivalent of two PhDs worth of worth of life knowledge. And so even if let's say we're not operating at that particular pace, maybe it's maybe it's a PhD equivalent every 10 years. You know, it's not something we have to be actively working towards. It's just the experience of our lives like we don't even have to study anything else. It's just the accumulation of experience alone. You know, if we will, like it's being processed by us all the time and it's those times of

reflection where maybe a synthesis can come together or something can occur to us in a meaningful way that that happens. That happens so often in terms of those sort of realizations. And for me, most of that comes along with, like, I can think of a couple of different examples relatively recently of that for me. And a couple of them have been sort of business related in terms of, oh, here's a new idea. Here's some, some new avenue to pursue. And others have been sort of personally related, just either they're either a greater sense of gratitude or a greater awareness of there are things that I could say to encourage those around me that would cost me absolutely nothing, but that would mean the world to them.

So it was a while ago that I had one of those realizations. And I was like, well, why wouldn't I tell my kids every day that I'm proud of them? Why wouldn't I compliment my wife and encourage her and say that she's doing a fantastic job when she is? And I'm not gaslighting on any of that stuff. I am proud of my kids. I am proud of my wife. And so like it, the thought just occurred to me one, one night while I was, while I was sitting by myself and just thinking through some stuff and, you know, again, not even purposely, I wasn't thinking about that. I didn't

have this to do list that was like, all right, step one, think deeply about how you, about your family, et cetera, et cetera. It's just, you know, that's where, that's where my thoughts went. And it's like, man, I really am grateful. I really do feel, you know, proud of kids. So they should know that they should hear that from me. And then it's all of the, all of the follow-on thoughts to stuff like that. Like, well, of course, like what's the pro pro con benefit, you know, cost benefit analysis, zero cost, massive benefit. Of course I should be doing this. Then you go through the thoughts like, well, why haven't I been doing this? That's kind of, that's kind of silly. And then, you know, you have all the countervailing and all the rest of it.

And it's like, all right, well, no, this is, this is a good idea. It struck, it struck me as a good idea. So I'm going to, so I'm going to do it. And so I just built that, built that into my routine. And like, you know how sometimes when you're not either, you're not sure how something is going to go over or maybe it's going to sound weird or it feels a little bit strange. A lot of prayer is like this in the, in the beginning of people's walk with, walk with God. It's like, well, what, you know, what's really going on? What do I say? Like, what is this actually? But if you just, if you just start doing it, it will, it will feel more natural, particularly as

all of the, um, negative potential outcomes that you may have thought through fail to materialize completely. And you, and materialize completely and you see benefits of it. Like I know when I go to sleep at night, I know that my kids know that I love them and that I'm proud of them. And it causes me to reflect on the fact that that is not the case for a huge proportion of the population, way, way higher than it should be. a huge proportion of the population, way, way higher than it should be. And then it leads me to think, well, you know, how does that inform my, you know, my relationship with God? Do my kids

know that God loves them and that God is, God is proud of them, you know, and that God sees them even when, even when they fail and has that kind of love? Am I modeling that properly? Et cetera, et cetera. So it's not these like high stakes wrestlings and things like that. It's just, if we will quiet ourselves sufficiently, then the natural result of this sort of PhD level life experience, not in a hoity toity kind of sense of, Oh, we know best, but it's like, we literally incorporate so much observational information every single day. And if we don't take a moment to stop and not even deliberately put the pieces of the puzzle together, it will just come together. If we're listening to it, if we're just giving space for it to be thoughtful.

It's really helped me, that's for sure, in a variety of different ways. Yeah. The practice echoes something that I do as well. My motivation, though, is different. I'm so highly motivated by the end of things, it's probably not even healthy. the end of things, it's probably not even healthy. But I've come to the conclusion that, and it's true, as weird as it is, but it's just, you know, everything is death. Everything is an end. Like, every moment with my kids is an end. And like you said, you get in front of your child and you get to tell them that you're proud of them and that God loves them and then shuttle them off to bed. And that's the end

of that. You know what I mean? You can never have that moment with that child at that time in their life ever again. And that's how I look at every day. Every day I wake up and think about that. And every night I go to bed grateful for that. And, you know, what I try to do is I try to get with them and get on their wavelength every day. my dogs because I know they're going to die before all of us. But I try to get on the wavelength. So I try to go in to my youngest son's bedroom or, you know, go outside and see what he's doing or see what he's doing in the living room and then get into the mindset of what he's doing, why he's doing it, why it's important to him. You know what I mean? And can I add something to it? And then see, does he want me to add something to it sometimes kids are content you know and they're like i don't need to learn how to make my bridge better that i'm building with legos you know because sometimes dads i think have a tendency to be like well let me show you the right way to do it you know and

i try to do the same thing with my older son, even when he's like, and the thing about kids as they get older, and this is important too, is they still want you around, you know, but there, there's a, there's, there's a place they want you in their life. You know what I mean? Like, like, and there's a lot of places in their life as they get older that they're like, leave me alone. Let me, I'm growing up. Give me, give me space.

as they get older that they're like, leave me alone, I'm growing up, give me space. And I like to try to find that space with him and, again, try to get on his wavelength, what's in his mind right now, what's important to him, what's he spending a lot of time thinking about. And then sometimes you get a talk out of it, sometimes you don't. But when you do, it's worth it.

And same thing with the wife. I try to go in a lot of times as the night carries on, you don't you know but when you do it's worth it and you know same thing with the wife same i try to go in a lot of times as the as the night carries on she'll head up to bed a lot earlier than us and uh you know that's the time to go up and talk and what's going on work friends whatever all that kind of stuff and just see what's in her heart and on her heart and mind and all that kind of stuff and just see what's in her heart and on her heart and mind and all that kind of stuff and and i don't know if it's this way with you and your wife but i i get the same vibe that i get from everybody and everything else depending on the day you know there are some days when they're like sit here be with me listen let's talk let's play whatever and then there's some days where it's like i'm i just want to be where it's like, I just want to be alone.

And when you tell me you want to be alone, I'm the guy who's like, oh, I get it. You want to be alone. I completely understand. The dogs, they don't care. They always want you up under them. I play with the dogs. I make sure to play with the dogs every day, too, because I get down on the floor with them. I'm a weirdo with the dogs. I just get down on the floor with them, you know.

I'm a weirdo with the dogs, but I think it's so important, man, because, you know, it's over. I mean, you're going to blink and it's over. We're both going to blink and we're going to be on this microphone and our kids are going to be 18. Our youngest will be 18 and we'll be like, oh, we did it. Can you believe it? You know, when I was in the Outer banks last year i i just talked about this i think on monday but what it's it must be in the air steven the appreciation for children because a lot of people are talking about it but i was driving i was riding a bike rather in the outer banks last year with everybody the family. And we rode by this wooden house that we had.

It was like a three-story wooden house that we rented out two years before or whatever. And I saw the driveway, and the driveway's like, you know, broken up seashells and sand and that kind of stuff. And in my head, this phrase kept going through my head, and it was about scrounging through that sand and those shells for a fragment of jake or or a shard of carter from that time you know what i mean and then then i was like there's nothing there you know and then i started thinking their faces those young faces are forbidden now on the earth like you they don't come you can't get them back you look at pictures but those moments they're gone you know and that's the way you got to look at it

when you're in the thick of it like you are right now and like i am you know this is it and i learned that from people i literally learned that from people I'd be walking around in stores with my kids when my son was like a newborn and my other son was four or five. And I'd run into these older people, and they would always say the same thing. No matter where I was, in Philly, in Virginia, in Lowe's, in Target, didn't matter, wherever I was, they would always say, oh, man, I remember those years. I wish I had those years back.

Over and over again. And that changed my whole career and my whole outlook. I said, all right, I'm either going to work part-time and work from home part-time, you know, because at the time I was still in food safety at the food bank, or I'm going to work from home, period, because this is it. You know, this is the window and this window is going to shut and then that's it and you do what you can with that window and then and then it's over and it's just yeah i mean it is an amazing blessing you if the position that you're in to be at home and to be around the kids dude it's it's there's no money there's no money, there's no gold, there's nothing, you know what I mean? That can replace that. I should do, man. And it's like, you certainly don't want to take any of that stuff for granted, but it takes active work to avoid taking it for granted or to, you know,

avoid just seeing the, you know, the, the downsides of this sort of stuff and wanting to, wanting to get away. But yeah, we, we hear that all the time from people in terms of how precious this time is and mostly just, well, it goes quick. And I mean, here in the Northeast, people are so focused on career and, and everything else like that. Again, it's a, it's a generalization, but it's, um, it's like that again it's a it's a generalization but it's um it's a tight it's a typecast because it's because it's true here in the new york metro area people are so focused so focused on that stuff that and and you can see it either in your own life your own experience or other or other things like that where that sacrifice was made

and it gets back to this notion of opportunity costs that we you know we talked we we've talked many times about that when when you make a choice even a choice to you know avoid something or you know choosing one thing means that you're actively also choosing to not do any of the other things you could have done with that time, with those, with those resources. And so it comes back to those priorities. And if, you know, if what motivates people, um, is this, is the state of the world, the, the best, the best reaction to that, in my view, would be, well, whatever there is that is precious and valuable and eternal given the temporary nature of what we have even to your point the moment to moment type of type of deal it it deserves that respect

and that attention and so you know all the all the modern day gurus talking about living in the president's like they're the finger is on something that is really important. And then the question is how. And, you know, at the end of the day, it's one of those things that is simple, but not easy. You have to fight off all of these other things that would pull you away, but you have to balance all of the, all of the responsibilities. It's just a part of, it's part of adult life, particularly as part of a, part of a family as a, as a husband, as a, as a father. And it's incredibly important. And there isn't a, you know, there isn't something that is, you know, a-step routine that's going to work well and the same for every person in every situation.

But if there is the right kind of priority and value set up that even if it's not fully articulated in some form of treatise, if you really have – and you can see it reflected in your decisions of what, of what you choose to spend your time on. And if you're, if you're on autopilot, then that's the recipe for regret. Like at a, at a certain point you're going to look back and be like, Oh man, I, I had that, I had that wrong. I had that messed up. And you know, hopefully in, in our situations we can say, yeah, I didn't, I didn't do it perfectly, but I was paying attention and I was trying to make adjustments. And I got that time and I don't have that particular regret, particularly as it pertains to our families. But you're absolutely right about the moment-to-moment stuff being precious. And for me, and I was just in a Bible study before this conversation, we were talking about Daniel, we were talking about Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego

in the fiery furnace. And because we are so built in to have this perspective of the hero's journey and to look up to those kind of, those kinds of examples in the faith, you see these people standing firm in this like massive moment that gets recorded in scripture for all time. And for me, there is on one hand, time. And for me, there is on one hand, the tendency to say, well, you know, I may, I may never, I may, may never get a moment like that to represent, to prove my metal and to have that be, you know, part of the, you know, part of the hero hero's journey there from, from, from my side, from, from my side, maybe, maybe I will, but I, either way, it's the, the strength that God himself alone can provide that the Holy spirit can provide to stand in those situations. And I don't think we should imagine that the only hero's journey, uh, like the only template has to have those moments of just this sort of over the top,

surreal level, grandiosity and drama. I think the I think the obedience that we show in the everyday day to day activities, even if it's not, you know, as quote, unquote, impactful by, you know, whatever metric you choose to you choose to use, even if it's not this history changing thing, if we're put in a position and God has called us to be obedient in whatever way, large or small, then that will echo. That will store up treasures in heaven. That will do what is necessary. Those moments are, I hesitate to say exactly because I don't know how to express it properly. It's not that those moments are of equal, of exactly precise equal import.

It's not as if everything is on the exact same playing field, but with whatever you're dealt, if you can have peace of mind and say that if I'm being obedient in these quote unquote small things, that those are not like insignificant victories, that those are not insignificant contributions. And, and for me, what's directing is that, you know, I could have all of these different, these different ambitions. And, you know, 10 years ago when, when I gave my life to Christ, it was like, okay, well, you know, what can I do? What can I do? What can I do? I want to, I want to be used. I want to, I want to do all these sorts of things. And, and for me, I've, I've come to the piece of in my immediate sphere of influence and responsibility.

If everything God has blessed me with, if all of it was just for the sake of pouring into my kids and giving them the best opportunity that they have to exceed me in the faith, to succeed, to grow, to experience the peace and joy and fulfillment that is absolutely necessary to the satisfaction of our spirits and our souls. If I can accomplish that, then it will all have been worth it. Now, if there are other opportunities, if the time comes for whatever, broader influence, broader obedience, broader whatever, that's fine. But I've grown to the point, and it took me a long time to get there, James, where I'm content to say, let me just deal with and make the most of what is immediately in front of me. Let me plan loosely for the future by opening myself up to ideas and direction. Let me follow and be obedient when I have that clear guidance from prayer and from scripture, from my own intuition and everything else like that. And if there is an

opportunity and it is meant to be, it will be in, in God's timing and there's nothing I can do to rush it other than mess it up. So that, that is what sort of helps me in balance stay in, in the present moment where I, where I enjoy these things. And, you know, I'm, I'm mid th30s now i'm 36 and i know like even even now my memory is not not what it not what it used to be but i have these present moments with with my kids i don't i don't remember precisely all of the developmental milestones but i do know that i know where my kids are at the built-in experience is ingrained into me to help me make those decisions. I don't need some big data model to know what to do next. You don't need a fancy degree to

be able to sort all those things out. You just need to be present and to be paying attention and to be curious about it. And you earnestly have to want to serve other people and to help them. And if we're not motivated to do that for our families or on the flip side, whatever is going to make us motivated to do that for our families, then it's worth clinging on to. And I'm sure in another 10 years, I'll find – I would hope that I would find other ways to either express these ideas more efficiently to experience new things that allow me to go even further in this kind of direction. Or maybe, James, I'll find out I was 100 percent wrong, but at least I'll be then moving in a slightly better direction because I'll have realized what my mistakes have been. So if we're growing and we're living, then I think we grow just by living.

But we do have to be paying attention to it. If we're on autopilot, that's where things just don't work. Yeah. That's where things just don't work. Yeah. Yeah, I'm glad you brought up Hero's Journey, man, because we play that out in our heads, and I know a lot of guys do it,

and a lot of guys... I got a very close friend, actually, who's all but disappeared to this world, or at least my world, because of big goals. Nothing bad, you know what I mean? No bad decisions, married, kids, the whole thing. But just had a passion and had a career, and they were knitted together,

and they took every bit of the man's time, you know what I mean? And some people do that kind of thing. But you brought up the hero's journey, and it made me realize that, you know, you can have that whole thing each day. And really, for me, it comes down to a routine. You know, I know that the listeners are so sick of me saying the R word. I need to start calling it the r word but i can't say enough about routine and about uh building out the routine day to day and really really not only building it out thoughtfully but giving it everything you got

to be honest with that routine because then you create the world the day the world that you want you know and and even like you like like even throwing yourself into the furnace you know like i'm at a point right now where i'm i'm literally throwing myself into the furnace most every day because in virginia it, you know, 80, 90 degrees, and it's my favorite time of the year to run and work out outside. And that test is, you know, it's like the test, the allies, the enemies in the hero's journey. And what I think people struggle with big time is that's the thing that you don't often find. That's the thing that people go out to find.

Like the call to adventure is always there. The refusal of the call is always there. And maybe even, you know, meeting the mentor is there, you know. But crossing the threshold and running into that enemy and that test and overcoming those enemies, that's something that I think people miss a lot. And the way that I do it because I don't have enemies, you know, and I don't really face many tests from a, you know, a literal, you know, enemy standpoint is I build that thing into my life as working out intense workouts because that's what it is. Then I realize, okay, I'm on this path. I've reached this point in my day where now it's time to test the physical body. And then again, you sink down after that and you get the reward and the road back and you're tired and exhausted.

And that leads to the resurrection, and you're tired and exhausted. And that leads to the resurrection, like in the hero's journey. It can all play out in a single day if you build a routine in your life and you stick to it. And it's not like from sunup to sundown you have to push everybody away and be like, leave me alone. I'm on my hero's journey. You know what I mean? But it all can be built out that way. Because that's my real victory. I mean, I'm this weird guy in the prepping world.

And one of the weirdest things about me is I'm not really the best at anything. You know what I mean? I'm not the guy you go to to talk to about guns. I'm not the guy you go to to talk to about guns i'm not the guy you go to to talk about well maybe homesteading i do a lot of that stuff but i'm not the best at anything um but day by day man you know i win every day because of that routine because of building out that routine literally writing those lists of to-dos down each and every day and just the grind every day the consistency the like james is going to be there for sure and he's going to knock out these things that we expect him to knock out every single day and and it's not just james the writer it's not just james the podcaster it's james the dad james the husband j you know what I mean? All that kind of stuff. And to your point about service, you know, that's a life worth living. And then when you do feel

like, you know what, I'm going to play two hours of Arkham City tonight, you've already earned it. You know, you've already earned it. You've probably earned it in bunches. if we are attentive to those around us, then we do, we do get those victories, whether they, whether they end up being recognized on some grandiose scale in, in this world or, or not at the end of the day, that doesn't matter because you have to live with yourself and you have to live with the people, the people around you. And you don't need to go and start a whole bunch of company companies and live this sort of idealized entrepreneurial entrepreneurial kind of kind of lifestyle. Now, I think it makes a lot of pragmatic sense for everyone to to everyone to explore how to make use of the talents that they do have. And to your point, you don't have to be the best at any particular thing to make a contribution.

You just have to be steady. You have to show up. And if people know that you are reliable and that they can trust you and that you're going to be transparent and there for them, that is the best you can you can do kind of let the let the chips fall where they may in these in these sorts of cases and so you know i'm i'm right there i'm right there with you james maybe not uh running outside in the 90 degree heat to be perfectly honest maybe to my to my own detriment but that takes some time that's yeah sure that takes that so there's a curve there

i'll play i'll play around uh around a golf but in a in a cart so maybe i could uh maybe i could move could move past the well don't definitely don't underestimate the long walk yeah you know i don't know if you have a park or woods around your way but like a long walk in the woods man no phone you know again yourself honey i gotta take 30 minutes i'm gonna walk as far as i can for 15 and then walk back i mean that's a lot happens there oh it sure does it's it's very much a uh it's very much a dude thing as well like when i'm when i'm on the golf course course, when I'm playing golf with my father-in-law or some other people or anything else like that, I always get home and my wife asks me, well, what did you talk about? And I was like, well, we talked about the shots that we just hit. We talked about the shots that we're going to hit.

And then we talk about how bad the shots went. We talk about what we're doing. We're immersed in that. It's a different kind of bonding for men than for women. And, you know, even if you're just by yourself, it's like, well, what are you thinking about? And it's not – I hesitate to even say that that is a – that that's a distraction or an escape mechanism or other things like that. To your point, on a walk, there's a whole school of philosophers from Greece that basically said that you do your best thinking and talking when you're on walks. Oh, definitely.

You know, that's just, there's part of, there's something about the kinesthetics of just sort of getting your body moving and kind of on autopilot that can kind of, you know, lubricate that a monetization aspect around that in terms of internet internet content but it's something that you have to you have to do for yourself like you could watch i don't know what a hundred a hundred hours worth of videos about about self-improvement and have it do absolutely nothing even if it gives you a bit of, you know, inspirational dopamine in the moment that you consume the content it's in those, uh, it's in those small victories, those small moments, those, uh, aspects of obedience that I, and I'm using small euphemistically cause they're not, they're big it's like it's the like to your point about routine i mean that is the that is the fabric of what of what life is made of and it's worth

trying to get right or at the very least trying to get trying to get better at and again you don't need to be uh an academic expert to you know to try and figure that sort of stuff out. And we, we see these, we see these sorts of examples and we say, we look at the scenarios in the world around us and we imagine the lives of the powerful, the successful, the famous, like the rich, the wealthy, all, all of these things. And, you know, at the end of the day, if you ask yourself, well, would I, would I trade places with, uh, with those, with those sorts of people, you know, the realistic answer should probably be in almost every case, you know, absolutely not. Um, you know, I'm, I'm where I am for, for a reason. Other people are where they are for a reason.

We're all doing the comparison as always is to ourselves and where we're supposed to be as ordained as opposed to this – just the bizarro world kind of rat race. And I think, you know, there is this sort of silver lining on the, you know, on the cloud of the internal competition and the way that, you know, social media preys on people's instincts. And it's very much the case that people are getting swept up into that, particularly, particularly younger kids. And it's, it's extremely damaging and all of that. But, It's extremely damaging and all of that. But, you know, hopefully it's the kind of thing that it won't take people 30, 40, 50 years to see the bankruptcy in something that, you know, if you if you consume all this content, if you go down one particular road, if you spend your time in something like that. I think when we look at the mental health crises that are going on and everything else like that, and I don't want to make light of this issue or consider this a diagnostic, but at a certain point, would you rather hit rock bottom early or late? Probably early, provided that there's the right kind of resources, the right kind of support network to help you get through that to the other side. But we all have to go through those sort of moments.

We all have – wherever they end up on the spectrum, we all have a rock bottom. And sometimes that's where we have to go in order to learn those kinds of lessons. And if we never like take a a long walk then it's going to be harder for us to for us to dig out of that but maybe with the um maybe with the density of everything that is that is going on maybe with the just the sheer concentration of information and stimulus and negative news and everything else like that maybe that will help people get through to seeing, oh, this is just, I don't know where I want to go, but I don't want to be here, or I don't want to go here, and maybe looking for the right kind of solutions. Maybe we have to iterate on that a bunch of times, but the answers are out there. It is worth asking the

questions. It's worth asking the questions. It's worth reaching out and trying to figure this stuff out. And it's not going to be something that someone else can give to you necessarily. It's going to take your choice and your effort to say, I am, you know, I want to go in a different direction. I want to improve. I want to see, even if it's just, I want to see what is, what is possible because I'm experiencing some degree of disillusionment

about what appears to be in front of my face. That in and of itself, it is the hero's journey. And you know, whether there's going to be great literature written about each one of our individual pursuits and biographies, I just, I just don't think that matters. And maybe that's a coping mechanism because it's like, you know, probably not let's, let's say, but you know, it just doesn't, it doesn't matter to me anymore, James. And these are conclusions I've come to since mostly, mostly since being even more so being so, being a father in addition to being a husband, then trying my absolute best to be a man of faith. If I'm on those three journeys, then that's certainly more than I can handle in my own strength. So it might as well be a hero's journey to me.

So I'm just going to call it that. Well, that's because you've read it. You've probably digested the reality of it. You've read about it in the Bible, undoubtedly. And you probably understood it long before me, the fact that the greatest weapon that we could forge for the future is kids. You know what I mean? It's like you want Christianity to grow in the world.

Well, if you're a Christian, you better have kids. You know what I mean? You want freedom, and you want to stave off this form of digital tyranny that's taking root in America. And you're a constitutionally driven, you know, freedom loving American. Well, you can buy all the guns you want. And, you know, I'm a prepper guy. So, you know, guns and all this kind of stuff, stocking food, training, learning how to shoot, learning how to fight, all this kind of stuff stocking food training learning how to shoot learning how to fight all this kind of crafting this this thing that out of a a disgrace of a human before i started down this path crafting this little like almost feels like a pseudo warrior from time to time um is for me it's a 30 year

35 year endeavor or whatever like if where i'm at right now 38 years old at the average man's gonna live to 74 years old so i at my best i got 10 more years, maybe 20 more years as this peak thing that I've created through vanity and through ego and through desires of my own to become a tool to keep the things going that I appreciate and have the world run the way that I think it should be run. And that's just pitiful in comparison to generations. You know what I mean? In comparison to my kids and the effect that having kids and raising good kids and sending them out into the world to propagate everything that they've learned from you and so on, and the people that you've put them in front of hopefully not just your your brainwashing but everyone else who loves brainwashing you know they go out into the world and they spread that man and and it's that's exponential you know because how many people do they run into and so on it's the it's the great way and in i think it's in psalms it's

the it's uh children of the heritage from the lord and it says they're like arrows in the hands of a warrior you know and when i read that in the bible i was like wow because i've heard billy graham years ago or i heard someone quote that i never actually found the quote so i don't know if it's 100 true or not but i heard I heard someone quote Billy Graham years ago and say, I talked to so many people and brought so many people to God, and I think my time would have been better spent with my kids. They're going to have a longer standing effect or something to that effect, and I thought about that for years and years. And then I read that line in the Bible about, you know, like children are a reward. They're like arrows in

the hands of a warrior. And they're a blessing and a heritage from the Lord. And I just said to myself, like, wow, this is the thing. And it's the thing that we, like to your point, living in the Northeast, and it's not definitely not just in the Northeast, but the hustle. And it's the thing that we, to your point, living in the Northeast, and it's definitely not just in the Northeast, but the hustle of making it, the hustle of you making your money, you getting your position, you becoming the best version of you, self-help books, all this stuff, and realizing, okay, I've done all this work. I'm 40 years old. I've got 20 more good years to affect this world probably.

And then after that, I'm just going to be, you know, on the downslope. Whereas children, their children, their children's children, the legacy is what is the answer to everything anymore. I mean, you look at most nations. What are most nations facing in the next 10, 20 years? It's declining birth rate, you know? So it puts us in a crazy position where, like, if you really want to get, if you really want Christianity to dominate all over the world and you're a Christian,

there's, you know, aside from your relationship with God, there's almost nothing else you can do. Donate money, donate time, volunteer. There's almost nothing you can do that's more of a home run than having Christian children and having them go out into the world and be fruitful and multiply. Right. So it is the mission in my head. And I think when you talk about mental health and things like that, I think inherently people know it's the mission.

Even if they tell themselves, I'll just get an abortion. Even if they tell themselves, I never wanted kids anyway. You know what I mean? I think like our our core is like be fruitful and multiply. I mean, it's pretty, pretty, pretty simple, you know? Our core is like, be fruitful and multiply. I mean, it's pretty simple, you know? No, I'm right there with you. And I would caveat this with the lesson from the New Testament that there are some people who are called into singleness and other things like that. So we're, of course, not intending to put that kind of stuff down. But for us in the spots that we're in, I couldn't agree with you

more, James. It is the mission. It is the hero's journey. Because it's a different role. Because if you can enable the hero's journey for others, even knowing that they're going to be on that journey, even just to get them to see it for what it is and have the right contours, you know, to, to give them a head start. Everybody wants their kids to be safe and to have it better than they had it, you know, and there are so many things that we can do to pass on that kind of knowledge. If we will build it into our routine, if we will be attentive, if we will have our priorities straight. And it's just an amazing thing. And unfortunately, James, I feel like we're just getting started.

But I have to give my eight-month-old her Dream Feed bottle. So otherwise, she's not going to sleep through the night. So I got to heat up some milk here for you, man. No problem. But I know I owe you a conversation about silver and probably about three more hours on these topics. Yeah, this was supposed to be about gold and silver. I know. That's fine. Silver's above 30. You can buy it if you have the resources to put down for it.

Well, how ironic that we got on here to talk about wealth and we wound up talking about the true wealth. Maybe it's not ironic at all, my friend. There you go. But it's always a pleasure. We'll have to make it a quicker pit stop this time, faster turnaround for another conversation. No doubt, man. Always a pleasure. And God bless you and all those kids, man.

You're doing it. Same to you, my friend. Thank you for all you're doing at PBN and everything else. We love you, man. Talk to you soon. Enjoy your night. See you. God bless.

Yeah, folks. Didn't know we were going to do dad talk. Guess we did dad talk. It's always good with Stephen Menke. To all of you out there that this is resonating with, I'll leave you with this message.

We don't know what the full potential of fatherhood is yet. It's one of the rare things in life. Stephen mentioned on the way out the door almost as if he knew I was going to end with this that we want to give our kids a better life than we had right and you know

it's not to downplay the fathers of yore the fathers of old but it's just the realization and the understanding that you see this new generation of dads coming up who aren't stuck working. They aren't stuck fighting on the front lines. They aren't stuck, you know, hiding their emotions and not having the kind of relationship that's capable, hiding their emotions and not having the kind of relationship that's capable, that they could have been capable of.

Men are at a point right now, fathers in particular, at a point right now where we are stepping into uncharted territory. You know? We don't really know what the, the, what's the best dad look like. You know what I mean? Like the, for the longest time,

the best dad was this idea of like a guy who is a protector and a provider. And, and he goes out to work nine to 12 hours a day and comes home and, and does dad things on the weekend. And, you know, there's a lot of distance and a lot of hiding and a lot of weird stuff in that old idea of dad. And I see dads all the time, all over social media, dads homeschooling. I see dads doing all kinds of stuff that this just I it's it's opened me up to this idea of like we really don't know and it's to some degree I guess it's the same with

mothers too but you have that sort of caricature caregiving and loving mom in your head. You know what I mean? And dad, I think, was starved, maybe purposefully, maybe not, maybe because it was essential for that time with the family for so long. And then, you know, even in that time spent with the family, he was limited in his ability to express all the emotions that you want to express because that's not what men do. You know what I mean? There was always that old thing, like there are these lists of things that you can't do. It's like here you are standing in the most important time period of your life. You have little kids and you have to wrestle with this list of things that men don't do.

And all that's shedding. All that's shedding away now and we're starting to see and we're starting to read. It's one of the rare things in our society right now that most everything you go on social media, you read about, most everything in our society you look at you say i know without a doubt what the best iteration of this thing is right but when it comes to fatherhood i encourage you to get wild and crazy and thoughtful and, you know, really play this game as hard as you can play it

because we don't really know what the top of the tier is when it comes to being a dad. We don't know how effective you can be as a father. You know what I'm saying? With technology now, we've never been in a position, men have never been in a position to be fathers the way that they can be fathers today. And we have to take advantage of that moment. We have to really give that our all.

Because it may not last forever. We may only have this window we may have a hundred years we may have 500 years who knows but right now we are poised man we are poised to do amazing things as dads but it takes routine it takes willpower and uh you know for me what's it take it takes the I'm going to feel when I get off this show. Dead. Eat something bad for you. Fall asleep, you know.

That's one path you can take. Or you can get off the microphone, drink some water, dig deep, go make sure the kids are in bed. And if they're up or if something's on their mind, have a long talk with them. You know what I mean? Dig deep to find what you need to be dead. All right? Appreciate you, Stephen Menking.

Always a pleasure, my man. PBN family family you guys rock not the I Am Liberty show I thought we were going to have tonight but you know what hey it is what it is I'll talk to you guys soon see ya thank you for listening

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