The Press Box - Ep. 228: ‘Bachelor Party' With the Sports Gal

Episode Date: January 3, 2017

The Ringer’s Juliet Litman is joined by the Sports Gal to recap the first episode of ‘The Bachelor’ and to ask the big questions, such as “Is Nick a good bachelor?” (1:15), “Why did so many women wear red?” (8:05), “What was up with the dolphin/shark suit?” (21:05), and “Why didn’t Liz give Nick her number?” (32:05). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey, it's Bill Simmons. Today's episode of Channel 33 is brought to you by Seat Geek, the presenting sponsor for my podcast, as well as the only fan-friendly app for buying and selling tickets for sports and music. With just two taps on your phone, you can instantly buy Seekkeek tickets to an event and you can enter that event just using your phone. No paper tickets. Drop your old ticket app. Use one that's built for 2016. Download the free Seatgeek app or go to Seekgeek.com. Welcome to Bachelor Party. I'm Juliet Litman. I'm incredibly excited because Nick is back and I brought in my favorite expert, the sports gal, talk about him. Hi, everybody. Happy to be here. Are we using your name on this podcast? Like, do people know your name? I don't know. Okay. I think they do. I mean, it's like all over the internet. Okay, we won't use your name then. Why not? It's a little mystery. You know who likes mystery? Liz. Remember she mentioned that last night? Yes, she did. We're going to get to her where there's a lot to talk about because it was a good episode. Yeah. I'm feeling positive about this season. But I want to talk about Nick first. So many mixed feelings about Nick. People feel strongly about him, positive, negative, but there's just a lot of opinions.

Where are you with Nick right now? I think Nick exudes sex appeal. I can't help it. He's like, there's just something about him that it's, you know, he's not the dumbest guy. No. He's definitely not the smartest guy. No. But he's absolutely one of the sexier guys.

His abs are very sexy. Well, his body, the shower scene in the beginning, I mean, even my daughter, who's like 11 was like, hubba, hubba. Like, she was like looking at me and be like, mom. Like, this is, he's a good looking guy. And he also has like these mannerisms that are kind of endearing. Sure. Okay. So like, you mean like his mumbling?

Do you like his mumbling? I like his mumbling too. Around the ringer office, people were criticizing his mumbling. But I actually never thought of it as mumbling until he called it such. Yeah. Like I just thought it was like a quirk of Nick or something. Yeah. And I kind of like quirk.

So I guess maybe that's part of it. Me too. They're sexy. It's just sexy. So one thing I really couldn't ignore was they showed the clips of him on Andy's season and then on Caitlin's season. And then he looks roughly the same as he did in Paradise. But his appearance has really changed. It's almost like the shape of his head has changed.

I kind of can't get over it. Like I guess it's just weight loss. But like, or toning? I don't know. But it's like it was drastic to me. Has he not always had a beard? No, he didn't always have a beard. And it's been how many years since he's been doing this?

Too. So he's turning into a man. Yeah, we're watching go through a second puberty. Because men get filled out in the face as they get older, though, and they start to look better. We look worse, men look better. That is true. It's unfair. We lose collagen, somehow they gain it.

It's like really unfair. Like, just like George Clooney. He's really peaked after 35. Yeah. He's so handsome at like 40. But yeah, Nick is 35, which I would like to come back to his age later in regard to the girls. But, like, he just looks different to me. And I think he's much better looking than when he first came to the franchise.

Definitely. Like not only because of his body. Actually, like, he is, to me, is a Ryan Reynolds where, like, he clearly works very hard in his body. It's almost, like, not natural. Absolutely. But I also kind of admire him. He might be taking some HGH, possibly. Possibly.

I don't know. It's not banned in The Bachelor. No. I mean, we've seen in the past that, like, dudes come with, like, those giant, like, powder, like, muscle powder or whatever. But, yeah, it's, like, I feel like I know him. Like, I just feel like, yeah, we know all that next. We've been on a long ride with him. Totally.

And he's coming to his own now, I think. Yeah. I think it's time for him to redeem him. and find himself a woman. Sure. If one will trust him. If someone will trust him. He is.

Which I don't know if he's trustable because sexy does not equal trust to me. That's almost like the opposite of it. Yeah. Like that's where I think there's going to be problems for neck. Also, all these girls that just associate him with sex. Like the girl came in the camel. It's like, I'm really into humping. So are you.

Humps. That's what she said. But the one talking out of boobs and her and sex, the German lady that came in. And she's speaking German, but she's like, do you like my tits? I know. It is like just from the jump, a sexually charged season. Very sexually charged. I'm still more of a bad girl. I was excited to see him at the beginning. Me too.

Well, he's safe. He's loyal. Ben's going to stick with you. Nick, he might be looking around the room. I know. Ben is still with Lauren, which is like shocking. Those relationships never last that long. Yeah. I know. And Nick, he has a girl in the season who he's already slept with.

Like, that's kind of crazy. That's unprecedented. That hasn't happened yet on the bat. I'm surprised Chris Harrison didn't mention that. I don't think that's happened, right? No, I don't think so. I guess that they... Unless Nick slept with Caitlin and we didn't know about it before the...

Which might have happened. Could have. I don't think it did, but absolutely could have. I mean, who knows? Who knows? I just think that people, like, even people who didn't like Nick before, I just feel like this is going to be a good showing for him. One person in the office was like, I don't like Nick.

He's a bad bachelor. But, like, I disagree. I thought he was really charming when he was talking to the shark-slash-dolphin girl. And he was like, no, it's a shark. I thought that was funny. It was like real. Yeah, kind of. It was real.

No, I agree with you. Like, there's, he's pretty genuine. Yeah. Or at least he's good at mimicking it. This is my theory about Nick. I think that he's like a sponge and he absorbs like what he sees. And I think he's like figured out how to seem genuine on television by like being a little bit different. Like being a little bit more open or something.

Well, this kind of goes with the theme of him wanting to find love, but does he really? and he's a model now. And he's, I feel like he could, like, really invent the next Bachelor clothing line. Ooh. Or do something where he, right? Sure. He could because he's, he kind of doesn't have much else going on. He doesn't have a job.

Doesn't he have a job. Okay. I thought bachelors were supposed to, like, be this, you know, job holding, like, eligible guy that you're hoping, like, you get together and then you move somewhere nice and you start your life. Yeah. I mean, he lives in L.A. They try to trick you into thinking, like, he's. was in Chicago. They have the opening scene

of him walking across Michigan Avenue. But he lives in the east side of L.A. He, like, Instagrams from the Americana, which is the Grove of Glendale, basically. Totally. He lives here. Like, if you follow...

And the weird thing is that I'm even trying to pretend otherwise, because if you followed him on social media, and, like, that's the reason they chose him because he had a following. Like, you know that he's, like, been trying to be a model slash actor. Like, so it's just ridiculous. Even trying to make us things from Chicago.

But like, L.A. Nick is better than Chicago Nick anyway, so who cares? Yes, very true. Very true. He got a better trainer here for sure. Absolutely. Absolutely. I would love to know what gym he goes to or like what his workout is. Can't you find that out?

Probably. Yeah, I should get him on the show. Yeah, he was here in August. Yeah, no, I know. I was not into him and have said a lot of mean things about him. So he might not come back. No, it went great. Beforehand, he was like acknowledged that he knew I had been mean about him

and like wasn't worried about the awkwardness, I really appreciate it. What about the man on the street stuff? I was pretty impressed with the way he handled people. Yeah. Being, you know, just out there and... Yeah, totally. Kind of like in the Charlie Brown answer booth or whatever it was.

Yeah. Like, I agree with you that there's, like, something sexual about him, but it doesn't really, like, draw me in. He's just not, not for me. Okay. I don't know why. To each his own. I just feel like that's a weird opinion. I didn't say I'd marry him type.

I'm just saying, like, you know, that's the guy that's the one O-N-S. Sure. Right? Yeah, sure. Hence Liz. Yeah, exactly. Which we'll get to that. Yeah, let's talk about the women, though.

It was just ridiculous. By the way, this is a good segue way. I feel like my major takeaway about Nick last night is that he's a boobs man. Like, I just feel like he's really into boobs. And dark hair? And dark hair. And dark eyes. Like he likes darker women, maybe.

Yeah, he had a couple girls who looked just like Andy. Yep. They were pretty girls. There was no one who I was like, oh, she's busted. Yeah. No one had like too much makeup on, which is what I always look for, like that gross cake down. Did they tone it down for them or something? Maybe they did.

That actually was noticeable. Yeah. Why do you think so many women were in red? Oh, I think it, I do, Bill thinks I'm totally wrong on this theory, but I think my theory is perfect. I think red is sexy. Yeah. And Nick is. And I think these women go on the show and they're thinking, like, what is he going to like?

And what am I going to feel like around him? And you want to feel he makes women feel good about themselves. Sure. For sure. Yeah, definitely. And I think red is confidence and sexy at the same time. And I think also, if you are into fashion magazines or anything, like I happen to realize. that red was the color of this season.

So it could have been that too. Could have been as simple as that. It was just like out there. Yeah. I would never pick red. Not just because it was holidays because it was literally like the color, I think. Right, right, right, right. Yeah.

I would never pick red though. Like, would you? No. Never. I'd pick black. What would you wear? Black for sure. Yeah.

I mean, I would clearly wear black too. But like, what kind of dress would you pick? I think something like fitted, slightly revealing. Sure. Like something like that is mysterious. Yeah. shows my figure positively. But nothing where, like, you can see boob.

Not like Danielle L. Not like Daniel L. Whose boobs were just, like, out. Like, I just feel like I saw almost all of them. The girls were out to play. I don't think that's a good luck. I mean, Nick was very much into it. He was, like, slobbering over her.

Oh, he was so, like, clearly up and downing around. He was good. It was almost, it was like one of his low moments. He couldn't control himself. And I don't think he can. No, he definitely can. She looks like Corinne, who I will talk about in depth. But Danielle L is a quote-unquote small business owner and her business is that she owns three nail salons.

And they showed the newest. And I was like, I know where that is. Oh, really? Is it here? Yes, it's here. And I go to it all the time because it's right next to the soul cycle. It just opened on Hollywood. Oh, very cool.

We'll have to go visit. I've been meaning to go. It's really expensive. Oh. Like a gel manicure on its own was like 42 or something. Good for her. Yeah, I guess. But she is, I mean, she is like a business owner, I suppose.

Although I went to her like LinkedIn page and it didn't say that she was like, it was like, she was like chief brand officer. And if I was really the owner of my business. Maybe her mom owns it and she kind of consults or consults something about it. Maybe. That dress was pretty, was like ridiculous. Her sister picked it out if you recall. Yeah. That was, but he loved it.

Loved it. And I mean, clearly she knew what he wanted. He, yeah. It was sexy. Yeah. I mean, it was, it kind of reminded me of an. Espy's dress, to be honest. You've been to the SPs a few times and seen some of the very sexy dresses of these ladies. Yeah, it's like when people think they could like just literally

let it out hang out. This is not, it's like prom of awards. Yeah. So I think that's what she was going for. Sure, and a good Asby's look. I mean, he was really into it. It was like he looked rabid for like a split second. He was so excited. I like, I admire Danielle, I think. She obviously he's got chutzpah, you know? I mean, she had a classy way of carrying herself, though. She wasn't like, other than throwing it out there literally, she wasn't throwing it out there. That's true. She let her body speak for herself.

Okay, she looked just like Corinne to me. At one point, I couldn't tell them apart. But then Corinne really differentiated herself by being crazy. Yes. Like, just send her straight to Mexico. Oh, my God, that's what she's going for. You're right. She's going to be, she'll be the star, Paradise.

Like, I don't need to know anything else about the show to know that she'll be, like, day one going crazy. She's the villain. She's, I mean, obviously they gave us the sneak peek near the end of her, like, taking off her top and the swimming pool. So here's what we know about Karen so far. She has a nanny. She's a nanny. A 24-year-old woman who has a

nanny. Okay, like, it's one thing to have, like, a staff if you're rich, fine. A lot of people do that, I guess. But to call it a nanny, like, is that really necessary? Like, if she's, like, your family's, like, housekeeper, or even, like, assistant. How about an assistant?

Yeah, exactly, assistant. You're from a mosaic. You run a multi-million dollar company, Corinne. You can call it an assistant. Thanks for bringing that up. Looked into that. There's no evidence of what the company is. There's none at all.

She just likes to throw that number out. It could be like a million dollar company. It could not even exist. I couldn't figure out what it was. I googled it a bunch. She does have a lot of... But it's her dad's company, right? Yeah, that she's being poised to take over.

But I went to her Instagram. It's all like fake model shots. Hmm. I don't know. I don't like her blonde hair. I hate that kind of fake blonde. No, she's a total juggie. What's a juggie?

Is that care? That was like a show that Jimmy Kimmel and Adam Crowell used to have a long time ago. And there were these girls that bounced on trampolines. On the man show? Yeah. The man show. The juggies were the girls in the trampolines. Oh, my God. I don't remember that.

She totally could be. She's gross. She lives in Las Vegas. It makes sense to me. She lives in Miami or something. Yeah. So, okay, so she gave him the tokens, which I didn't really understand. Like, what was the point of that?

I thought it was poorly done. Like, I think the beginning when she first walked up to him and said, oh, you know, here's a token for a hug. Like I thought, okay, that's something and it wasn't over the top and, you know, whatever, let it go. It was like her way of just getting over the entrance. But then she handed them the bag. A giant one. With the money symbol on it, which I thought she was going to bring up the million-dollar company. I was like so hoping that she was going to say, and I am a multimillion-dollar company.

But she handed him that whatever that meant. It reminds me of the emoji of like a bag of money. I wonder if she was going for that. She might have been. Maybe 24. Knowing her, those youngsters, I just love emoji or something. Maybe. She just wouldn't back down.

And then she makes out with him and keeps it to herself for about 10 seconds. And then everyone has to know. And she just, she's just ridiculous. And then in the teaser. Someone yelled ho. They called her a ho. Yeah, when they were all sitting around the fire or something. And they were like, she's kissing him.

And someone's like, ho, ho, ho, or something. I heard in the backgrounds. Yeah. I like it. Yeah. I like it. We're getting a little caddy by the end of the night. That's when the drink starts setting in.

Like, think about it. They're there for, like, how many hours? 12 hours or something. It's like 4 in the morning. Yeah. It is 12 hours. They start filming at like 7, 7.30. Yeah.

They're done at like 6 or 7. And they're all like 110 pounds or less. Yeah, they haven't eaten in days. Haven't eaten. Weeks maybe. Yeah. Who knows? Like, this is their wedding day.

Yeah. I mean, it is. And that one girl was like basically wearing a white wedding dress. That's a bad move wearing a wedding dress. It's very heavy-handed. Yeah. Also, like, particularly for, particularly for Nick who is like, you know, he is like

the sex, the sex bachelor. Wait, who were her wedding dress? I can't remember. There was one blonde. I forget who it was. I think she got voted off. She was on, she couldn't have been on it for long. Yeah, she was very unimportant. She was hoping because that one year, that one wedding dress girl made it to the final four. Yeah, her name, I can't even remember, but she

was the runner up on Sean Losey. What was her name? It was like Britney or Danielle or something. One of those kind of names. She had a really big tongue. All I can remember, she had a really big tongue and like it bought it like even remember that because it just looked it just was like I'm normally large and like affected her talking I think I don't know it was really weird um Corin and the teaser for this year on said that she has a platinum vene so that's both a quote of Borat that was a good one also a ridiculous thing to say absolutely ridiculous thing to say but she seduces him potentially yeah it seems

like they have sex and she also goes topless and like the hot tub with him and all the other girls see so did they try to make it seem like was he, was everyone crying and disappointed because they found out he had sex with Liz already? Or was it because he had sex with her? And it's like him and Caitlin all over again. Right. I mean, how can they be madden by the Liz thing? That's not Nick's fault. He didn't, he wasn't supposed to be chased before the show. Exactly. Like that would be, that's not his fault. I thought he actually handled that pretty well. Maybe just because he kept it from them. Maybe. I mean, I don't know. I thought he handled the Liz thing well, actually.

Yeah. I don't know. I think she's beautiful, Liz. I do too. Like very like, aside from the back tat. I mean, really large. Yeah. That tats are kind of like, that's a sign. What do they call it as tramp stamp? Yeah, but I'd say it's not even a tramp stamp, though. Yeah. It's not a higher. Really large. What's the point of a tattoo like that? Like, does she like look at it in the mirror? Do you have to assume she has a marriage shower? You have to be drunk or high. Like, there's no way you get that tattoo. She does live in Las Vegas. Yeah, you don't get that tattoo sober. That's a, that's a like, I, instead of getting married, she got that tattoo. If you were giving, if you were giving birth, would you want your Dula to have a gigantic back tattoo?

I don't know. They're kind of hippie, so maybe. That's true. Also, I guess you wouldn't necessarily know unless your Dula also is like wearing backless shirts or topless. That's a good point. But who knows? I mean, that is true, though, like, Doolas are often hippies.

I wonder if Liz is like, if she, like, makes, you know how Dula's now, like, will help make, like, a placenta smoothie for you and like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it helps with the postpartum when you are nursing and all that stuff. I would, like, actually like to know more about Liz's career. I think Liz seems like she could be solid. Yeah. You know, like, I mean, they briefly, although let's backtrack a little.

And one of her best friends, obviously, is Jade. Jade. The Playboy model. Who's kind of, kind of, like she's sweet and seems like a nice person, but she's a little, little, I don't know what the word is. Not how much substance there. Not a lot of substance. She seems fine. Yeah.

She seems nice. I want her to come on this podcast. Okay, all right. I'm not going to insult her. No. No, but I actually do think Liz seems cool. Also, okay, so the immediate inference was that she's just there for the fame, which, which like, I don't know, like takes one to no one, Nick?

Like, I don't know. I don't hate her for it. I hated her dress. I have to say that. It was one shoulder, right? It was black and white and, like, busy. No, that was a different girl. That was a different girl.

No. That was Liz. That, like, tight one. That was, like, striped, black and white stripes. Yeah, that was Liz. No, that was Vanessa. That was Vanessa Grimaldi. Come on, are you sure?

Yeah, I'm positive. I grew up right now. Liz was wearing like a sparkly sequin dress. I'm going to pull it out. No, no. Yeah, one second. She was. You're right, it was blue.

Yeah. You're right. It was dark navy. I actually liked it. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right.

That is someone else. I did like her dress. Yeah. I thought she looked nice. She just looked natural. Here's a picture. You're right. Vanessa Grimaldi is the one that I think might win it.

Is that the special needs teacher slash girl from Canada? Yeah, she's from Montreal. He likes Canadians. He likes Canadians. Oh, yeah. Liz was wearing a nice dress. Thanks for showing me. Liz just seems normal to me.

She does. She seems like we'd be friends with her potentially. Sure. Yeah. Totally. But why didn't she give Nick his number? Even though she was just going to ignore him, like, just give him your number. Because I think it's the whole like, he's, I don't trust him thing, maybe, potentially.

Or it was in the heat of the moment. And then she was like feeling weird about it after, but she could have had. It's very hard for me to imagine a scenario in which I would have just had sex with the hot guy and not want to give him my number. Unless it was really bad sex. but I bet it wasn't because she's bound the show. Interesting. I don't know. I just like maybe I give out my number too easily.

I don't know. I don't know. I actually don't have a theory on this. Because that's just weird to me. The only theory really could be that he was bad. Yeah. Which is what Andy said about him. Andy Dorfman said that the most awkward sexual encounter of her life was the night in the fantasy suite.

Ooh. So I wonder if it's like. So maybe he's awkward. The sex appeal in the outside doesn't exactly translate. Interesting. It is possible. Now that we're talking. Or maybe he's like S&M or something.

Maybe he's like some freaking like 50 shades of Nick. I don't know. I feel like Liz could be into that. I got a very subtle vibe from her. I feel like she could be into that or something. I don't know. Is that mean to say about Lynn? Nope.

I don't think so. Well, she's, maybe it's the back tat. I don't know. I wonder if Nick has a complex about this now because of the Andy situation. Because in her book, she wrote that it was really awkward. And so now I wonder if like after he has sex with girls,

like it doesn't, they don't follow up. I wonder if maybe he, oh, I hate to think this, but. What is it? Maybe he, like. Just can't get it up? No, he can't. He gets it done too quick. Oh, too quickly.

Like, maybe it's like one look at the decalage and it's all over. I mean, he was really excited when Danielle L walked by. What's that? He was really excited when Daniel L walked by. He did. He was excited. I didn't think about this until this moment, but that's an interesting, interesting theory we have going here. No offense to Nick.

I mean, just, just, you know, mention me the possibilities here. Who knows? Liz, I was glad she stayed. I wasn't ready to say goodbye to that drama yet. No. No, me too. I think she'll be around for at least five episodes or so. Yeah.

Although, I don't know. Maybe it'll just become too much of a big deal to the other woman that he had sex with her. I don't think it should be, though. It's just in the teaser, it just seemed like that happened a little bit later. But I don't know. Yeah, we'll see. I've got the crying. The other girl's being upset was over Corinne because she just seems horrible.

She seems mean, too. Yeah. Like, Corinne, let's talk about the girl in the dolphin, the dolphin slash shark suit. And Corinne was making fun of her. Her name's Alexis. She said she's from Secaucus, New Jersey. First of all, I'm pretty sure it's Secaucus. And not only because I'm from New York, which is nearby, but in every NBA game, they have to, like, check the replay.

And they do it in Secaucus, New Jersey. That word is said. And like. Secaucus. Yes. All the time. She said her own hometown, Ron. That's embarrassing.

That is weird. That's like if I was like. Maybe the people that actually live there, though. I mean maybe. Say sea caucus? I mean maybe. Cacus. That's an interesting word.

I'm just saying. It was bizarre. So Cran was making fun of her because she kept her shark suit on the whole time. And she was like, I hope her body's okay underneath. Oh, yeah, that's right. That was mean. I hope the damage isn't too bad or something. I thought that was rude.

That was super catty. Yeah. Coming from her too. Because she's not going to have a lot of friends on the show. I guess she knows that and that's why she did it. Yeah. But I just thought that like that wasn't necessarily mean

because obviously Alexis was doing enough damage on her own. She didn't need Corinne. Yeah, I loved Alexis actually. I thought she was very, very like endearing with that shark, whatever caught in the, whatever she was doing.

She was doing dolphins sounds. They were pretty real dolphin things. And then she would in the water. I was like hysterically laughing. Like I'm making the dolphin noises. I don't know why, but I just thought that was killing me. I mean, bonus points were keeping heels

on the entire time wearing that stupid outfit. That was really, that was ridiculous. I, I think that she was just arrived, completely blocked out, and somehow maintained it all night.

That would be my, that would be my real problem if I were on the show is I wouldn't be able to stay awake. Yeah, at 3.m. I would, like, find a corner and just, like, fall asleep. They must feed them, though.

Like Red Bull or something? Yeah. You see late, though. They've got to be eating somewhere. You had a party recently. And that 1.45, I was just like, I was just like, I was kind of done. I was done.

I was also, I'd had like, several drinks. I got to go. I'm tired. So how do they do it for 12 hours? They must be doing one drink, one water, like taking it easy. I would go champagne. I'd go champagne water or champagne water. For sure.

Keeps you up more. Yes, I agree with you. Keep the blood going. Yeah. The problem with beer is just gets a full. But not a problem with champagne. Well, that happens too. I did that on my wedding night and it wasn't good.

It was just a day. It was not good. It was not good. It was really just the whole outfit started to expand. So it's a tough next morning. Yeah. You know, that's a good lesson. I guess if you were on The Bachelor.

you would wear a bachelor you would wear an A-line something. Absolutely. Absolutely. Alexis, when she walked into the pool with her dolphin suit on, I was just like, God, she's going to be wet for the next few hours. And I felt bad for her. I wonder if she took it up at some point. Well, I just don't, you know, there's nothing worse than like walking through the rain and then

your jeans get wet and then they're wet for hours. But that suit, just if you think about it, it's probably made of rayon and it doesn't stay wet at all. It's probably dry with the minutes of getting out. But what the hell is she wearing underneath? That's what I want to know. Why didn't she ever, like, just busts out of the dolphin suit? She could have.

And give him a sneak peek. Like, I didn't. Yeah, like a sexy shark dolphin's sneak peek. Yeah. Like, that would have been cool, right? Yeah. The most awkward, like, physical staging of the night was when she was in the pool in her suit and he was just sitting next to the pool and his actual suit.

Yes. And I was just like, this is so awkward. How are either of them, like, getting through this? But that's why you drank for moments like that. Absolutely. He didn't seem that drunk. I think he probably holds his liquor well. Yeah.

I mean. Or he wasn't drinking a lot. Because, I mean, think about the adrenaline that you have when you have a room full of 30 hot men or women wanting you. Yeah, totally. I don't think I'd need a drink. I'd be like, like, you know, it's just exciting, right?

He probably wakes up after, you know, whenever, after having rested. He's probably just like, must be such a blur. I would like request to like watch the footage, I think, because I wouldn't be able to remember anything that happened. They must do that, though, right? I think they give them recaps. If he comes back, which I hope he does, I'm going to ask. about like when they get to see footage and stuff because how do you keep track of everything?

He had 30 girls. Yeah. And they usually do 25 and he had 30 and I have a theory about that, which is it was supposed to be Luke as the Bachelor and at the last minute they changed to Nick. And I bet that they had to like supplement with a few more girls who were tailored for Nick that like they weren't going to do otherwise. Oh, so you think some of these were Luke's women? I think a lot of them were.

Interesting. Because I think that it was like a last minute switch. Hmm. Well, it was a good idea. I know. Because I was not at all interested in Luke. I'd be dreading talking about Luke right now. Oh, my God.

He's such a zero. Boring. Such a zero. All right, that's mean. More girls. Raven from Arkansas, from Hoxi, Arkansas. Owns a boutique. Shout out to her.

Okay, but listen. I looked at that boutique. And I swear I saw a piece of paint coming off of like a nail, which was like had an old picture there. And I was looking at it and I'm like, my nephew Kyle lives here. He's like 23 years old. I'm like, that's what the inside of his apartment looks like. You know, it's like this is not a boutique.

This is someone's apartment. I don't know if that was really... Did you see a storefront with glass? No. No. Or I felt like they showed her walking into a store and then they could have, like, switched to a different location. That's a great point.

I didn't think about that. And let's talk about the location. Hoxi, Arkansas. Hoxy, Arkansas. I mean... What goes on there? I don't know. She scared me.

She seemed very 90s to me. And just like, I don't know. For some reason, I'm afraid of Raven. I would like to vote her off right away. Absolutely. I'm just not into her. I don't care for her. No.

Let's move on. I don't mean to be mean. but the lips, little lips, weird lips. Like, I don't know. Also, there's something. Who dyes or her or that black for The Bachelor? That's a good point, too. Yeah, she was like, it was like gauphy and.

Yeah, but yet Southern. Like, it didn't go. It didn't work. Also, walking along the train tracks, I don't know. There's something about her that she freaked me out. It was like, she's like from the movie The Craft or something like that. I don't know. Yeah, that's a good.

I didn't care for her. Next, Jasmine G. Jasmine said she was a professional sports team dancer. I looked it up. She's a dancer for the Warriors. The Golden State Warriors. So A, depending on when she joined, she could have a ring from their championship, which is like a really big deal.

And then talking about, why is she on the show? She's surrounded by men all the time. She's hot. She's a dancer. She really need to be on the show. I don't get it. She made it seem like she was there for Nick. She did.

And I think she also said that women, like she's not used to having to fight for attention. Yeah. So I don't know. I loved her last one. I have to say that. That blue one? Yeah, that was like a good color for her. She looks great.

Yeah. She was very pretty. Yeah, she was pretty. I kind of like her. I think she seems crazy. Yeah, she could, I think she'd be a good wrinkle for the show. Yeah. Like, I didn't have bad things to say about her, and I didn't think she was going to be a front run or anything, though.

I mean, so Jasmine's African-American, and there's more racial diversity on the show than ever before, which is not to say there's a ton, but there's like several women of color, which is a really big deal. Yes. I mean, which was amazing. And then Rachel got the first impression rose, who's also black. Yeah. Which was, I mean, that's just like, I mean, like, she's definitely going to go all the way or one of the, one of the. top four for sure, right? So if you are a spoiler phobe,

just jump ahead two minutes because I'm on that. I didn't know to this, but I read it online today. Okay. So I'm going to tell you. I hope you don't mind. Oh, no. Oh, no. Okay. Go ahead. Tell me, tell me, tell me. Are you want to know? Yeah. Okay. Spoiler alert.

So before the season started in December, ABC put out a press release. That was like, the final four will be in Finland. And so then, like, you know that, and then last night in the teaser, they show Rachel and Nick cheersing to Finland. Oh, so she's there. So she makes it far.

She's in the final four. That's good. Yeah, it's great. I like her. She's genuine. I don't have anything that I don't like about her. Me too.

I really liked her. I thought of all the red dresses. Hers was the best. Absolutely. She also just, she had like an opening line that seems like she probably came up on her own, which was like

she said to Nick, like, I've made all, I did all my fantasy teams that I'm really just here to play for you or something, something like stupid, but she had like put some thought into it. That was cute.

They have the Wisconsin connection because she lived in Milwaukee when she went to Marquette. Yep. He did seem like interested in her. And she had a good segue into that. Totally. Like when they were talking,

it was like she kind of brought up that she was a fan of the team because of that. Yeah. No, I really legitimately thought. Goes on the show and like four months later he's engaged. Like this just doesn't.

Why rush to marriage? I don't know. There's plenty of women that you can meet. I know. And meeting them in this inorganic way doesn't necessarily have to happen. with a guy that's got a lot going on. Totally.

And like it just seems like maybe he is not supposed to find love this way, like even though he's tried. Right. And like, I mean, who is supposed to. He's supposed to establish his career so that he can build the first bachelor clothing line for men. I'm intrigued. Like, this is the vision you have for him.

I don't know. I just feel like he can model and he's, I don't know. He's like one of the more stylish bachelors. I kind of don't mind his tight pants. And when he wears bow ties, I'm good with all that. Yeah, he is stylish. Sure. He probably has a stylist.

I don't know. I just for some reason. But I remember the first time he was ever on The Bachelor when he first walked in. Yeah. Who was the Andy season, right? Yeah. And the first thing she said was that she loved his suit and the way he was dressed. He didn't get into style.

Yeah. Although he did, he used to call him Norm Corn Nick because he wore like a lot of flannel and like Midwestern gear. He's got that Alaska guy going on. I think it's a Wisconsin thing. Wisconsin thing. Yeah. That's fine. I like that about him.

But for some reason, I just feel like Nick should have a more awkward story of like meeting someone in a bar and then they get me. married. I don't know. Or like, that's not that awkward, but I mean, actually the Bachelor would be more awkward. Well, it could have been the Liz story. Yeah, that would have been great. If he was actually going to do it, it probably would have happened then. And he says that she didn't go after him and said no to his getting the number, but he could have gone after her. Right. He could have got her number from Jake too. Easily. Although I guess if a woman's like, no, you can't have my number. I don't know. Yeah. It's hard to tell if Nick is into games or not. Yes. Like on the one hand, I think he is

because he keeps going on this show. But on the other hand, the Liz stuff makes it seem less likely. But I do think it's weird that he just immediately assumed she's looking for fame, but maybe I'm the weird one for thinking that's not it. No, I don't know. I don't know.

I'm okay with Liz. I'm okay with her. I'm on board. And he's looking for fame too, so to each, you know, to show. And that's fine. We accept you for that, Nick. Let's talk with Vanessa, who you mentioned. She is from Montreal.

She's a special needs teacher. I don't. approve of them including her special needs students in her in her little video. Oh, interesting. Because I guess like the parent had a sign and release, but it just seems wrong. I don't know. I just didn't sit right with me. Really?

Yeah. For some reason I wasn't into it. I think she's gorgeous, Vanessa. I think she is too. Terrible dress. Simply terrible. That's the dress that I couldn't handle. First of all.

That was the only thing about her I didn't like. Yeah. She seemed nice. She seemed pretty smart. Seems like he was into her. She kind of looked a little. There's three girls that kind of look alike. Liz, Vanessa, and Whitney.

Whitney was a redhead with long hair. She was barely on the show, but she just caught my eye because she looked a little bit like Andy. I think all three of them look similar to Andy. Yeah, I always thought Andy was really pretty. Yeah, me too. Good taste, neck. Good for you. Vanessa seems like a frontrunner for sure.

I think so. Yeah, I think so. But I was okay with the showing the special needs kids, like showing what she did for work. I mean, the neonatal girl, who I also think, do you know who the neonatal? Yes, Danielle. Danielle M. I thought she was very pretty. Yeah.

She has good hair. Great hair. Zoe pointed out that she's like, good hair. She has a lob. She has a lob with waves. She has a long bob. That looks really good. And she was wearing a red dress with like catarettes on the back.

She seemed classy to me. She's a tragic story. Her fiance died. Oh, no. Yeah. So certainly that'll come up. Yeah. Certainly.

I think she has a bachelor at potential. I do too. Because she seems really sweet. Yeah. And I don't know. I liked her. I liked her. I liked her dress.

Yeah. She was good. Yeah, she's a good one. Keeper. I also, you want to talk about Lauren, his last name was Hussie. Lauren Hussie. She's gone, right?

She did the thing where she walked up to him and was like, we both have names that together were a vile Hussie. Yeah. A gross slut. Gross slut, yes. But we, I actually, Bill and I were both really disappointed when she got voted off because she seemed like she had stay power. Yeah, she did. And I was surprised. Like, why vote off the dolphin or keep on the dolphin shark and vote off Lauren Hussie?

I don't know. Like, was it the last name? Maybe it's the producers. I don't know. But I feel like there was so many other people that he could have gotten rid of. The dolphin shark is just like, you need to know more. You're just like, why? Like, why dolphins?

Just so, so ridiculous. Also, the Josephine, who's the girl who came with a hot dog and said you're a weiner in my book? Oh, the weiner girl, yeah. Okay, that was kind of fine, but then making them eat the raw hot dog. That was disgusting. How did they not get sick? I don't know. And then how do you, like, go have a drink after that, like a nice drink?

It's just so gross to me. I don't know. Have we talked about Taylor? I don't think we did. No, I don't think so. Taylor is biracial. She spoke about in her testimonial. Bi-racial therapist.

No, she did not say therapist. All right, I called her therapist. What did she? She said she's a mental health counselor. Okay. It's nice of you to call her a therapist. Because I think that's giving her more credit. First of all, she's 23.

So she probably has, like, an undergrad degree. She does, for sure. And then she probably works in, like, the department of, like, counseling at a high school. Yeah. They made it seem like she had an important job where she was advising people on relationships. That's ridiculous. I'm sure it's not what she does. Yeah.

Like a 23-year-old who's not done anything? No one's going to go to a 23-year-old that hasn't really had many relationships. No, absolutely not. She is pretty hot, though. I bet Nick will be in a eye. Her eyes are a little close together. She was just really young. Bill actually said she's got crazy eyes.

And he said that about someone else too. I forget the blonde, the blue-eye blonde. Hmm. Elizabeth, perhaps? Elizabeth. Yes. That's it. Yes.

She did kind of. crazy eyes. She kind of did. That's true. Also, Sarah, the other girl with a long bob, but didn't look as good. I bet she'll be around for like two to the episodes. She was fine. What about balls girl? He kept balls girl, but not Lauren Hussey. That was on with the nose ring, right? Yeah. Why did she call that having balls? Like, that's just having a nose ring. Because she stuffed the balls part of the nose ring into her nose and then when she brought it out and then she announced. That's not sexy. Not at all. I don't know why he kept her. I think you could have gotten rid of half those girls. But she's going to come out and, you know, talk about being a lesbian

in the past and then there's going to be a whole, that'll be interesting. I'm looking forward to that, to be honest. That will be good. That'll be fun on the show. What was that woman's name? I don't even remember. Balls girl? Yeah, I can't recall her name. It doesn't really matter. Yeah, I don't know. Sorry. We'll figure it out in the future. Whitney, who you don't remember, but I mentioned, she was wearing a red dress. She also is a Pilates instructor from Minnesota. So I'm certain she'll be in paradise. I mean, a tall, skinny brunette, Pilates instructor, made for reality TV. What about prom hair girl? You know the girl that had like the yellow dress? Oh yeah. And she kind of had like makeup that seemed like it was going to fall all over her face.

Was that lazy? She kind of had big 80s prom hair. I think that was Lacey perhaps. Is that it? I think she's gone. Yeah. She's gone. Is she not? I know. He kept her. It's so hard to keep track. She seems like she's going to be the mama bear and like get involved in everyone's situations in my head. Oh, great. Yeah. Was that Haley? That was, let's see I really can't keep notes but I thought I did too.

I don't know that. See, when I take notes I write what I call them. I don't write their real name. I watched this. German girl. Oh, I'm Maria.

I liked Hayley. Dallas Elizabeth. Where are you? I watched this two and a half times just so you know. I'm willing to admit that. You did? Well, I wanted to be prepared.

I wanted to really know the girls. I know I feel bad. I want to know about Nick. Why? Kristen. Kristen. Wedding videographer too. Oh, yes.

Kristen. Wedding videographer. Remember she danced with him. Yes. You know, I think that's probably the only legitimate career, or maybe the lawyers, too. There's one girl who's like a law school graduate of the Naples, Florida. But I could be a wedding videographer. Do it once and I call myself that. I don't know if that's legitimate. I think the nail salon, Danielle Nails is the better one. Daniel Nails is really close. I can't wait to go.

It's like I've been meaning to go there anyway because it looks luxurious. Jill Manny Petty with a massage. I need it right now. I'll go. I could use one. It'll be a great ring or field trip. Kristen spells her name with a C-H, like Chris T. Which is unusual. I don't know why, but like those, I'm always like a weird, weird about your name. But she's no control over that at all. No, it's her parents' fault.

Yeah, 100%. Unless she changed it. Kristen was pretty regular looking. Like, she seems like the kind of girl I could have gone to college with. Yeah. She was fine. Yeah. She was East Coast looking.

Totally. East Coast prom. Oh, my God. You could totally just sort these girls into geographic regions based on how they look. 100%. Yeah. Like the Canadian girl. for sure.

I just like that girl, that Vanessa. Yeah. She seems good. The two who he seemed like he really connected with Vanessa and Rachel, they both were great. Yeah.

It seems like he does. He says he likes outspoken women. I think that is true, actually. Yeah. He likes confident, outspoken women. Yeah. Because Kailin and Andy were both that as well.

Yeah. I kind of forget about Kelin. Let's just hope they're okay with the pre-jaculation. I'm just kidding. You know, let's just end it there. It's a great note for this first episode of Bachelor Party. This will be every week on Tuesday. days. Got some exciting guests lined up for the season. Perhaps a sports gal will also come back

if she'll be willing to. Oh yeah. Thank you for listening. Check out the rest of the Ringer podcast network. We've got a ton of feeds and The Ringer.com. Roger Sherman is recapping The Bachelor for us and he is very funny. So check it out. Thanks for listening and I'll be back next week.