The Rachel Cruze Show - Money and Life Lessons with Matthew McConaughey

Episode Date: March 1, 2021

Matthew McConaughey has lived a life most of us can only imagine, so I was thrilled to talk to him about all of it: money, fame, parenting, minimalism, staying true to your values and so much more. In this episode of The Rachel Cruze Show, you’ll learn: 5 money mistakes that can ruin your relationships Life lessons from Academy Award-winner and author Matthew McConaughey How to get your spouse on-board with paying off debt Resources: Zander Insurance Minno Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

learn to talk about money because it is a shame-filled subject. And when you can say things into the light, that shame goes away. But press in talking about it so, so good. Hey, everyone, welcome to another episode of the Rachel Crewe Show podcast. I'm so glad that you're here. Okay, this episode, guys, I interview someone. I'll give you one hint. All right, all right, all right. That's right. Mr. Matthew McConaughey is on. His new book, Green Lights, I love so much. And so the fact that he was a guest on the show, I cannot wait for you to hear our interview.

We talk about money, we talk about fame, we talk about family, all of it. It is such a great interview. I can't wait for you to hear. I also answer a question from Jared, who is struggling because his wife has had multiple jobs this year, and it seems like she can't stay motivated when it comes to winning with money. So we're going to talk through that,

because as we all know, spouses working on the same page is so, so crucial. But first, let's dive into a topic. Five money mistakes that are destroying your finances. Take a listen. All right, there are five things that you need to avoid, absolutely avoid, in order to be successful when it comes to money. Actually, there's probably more than five in life. But we're going to talk about five here because in all my years of living and breathing personal finance, I have found that these five really can ruin people financially. They steal your financial future. They cause you to be stressed out and anxious. Oh, it's not good. So let's talk through the five money mistakes that are destroying your finances. All right. Number one, credit cards. Yes, Rachel Cruz does not like credit cards.

I know it's a shock. But listen, credit cards, it's the one money mistake at a probably this entire list. The people just justify over and over. So whether it's the rewards or the airline miles or the points or the 0% interest. Everyone always has to think, well, Rachel, this is what I'm going to use it for, or I'm doing it because of this. Okay, listen, in 2020, the average credit card interest rate was 16.43%. You guys, that's insane. That's insane. The average family paid $1,155 and just credit card interest alone. A thousand dollars, just bye, see ya. I mean, it's so frustrating because, Number one, when you use a credit card, you are spending more. Studies have shown anywhere from 10 to 30% more more more when you're using a credit card. Why? Because emotionally, mentally, you can just check out.

It doesn't even feel like your money. So you're like, oh, yeah, just add a little bit more here, a little bit more here. And you just end up justifying it all the way. And it feels like, oh, it's fine. Well, then you end up with credit card debt and paying interest on something that you bought a month ago or two months ago or three months ago. So you spend more. And also, again, the rationale, okay, well, I'm just doing it again, for all the point systems. Okay, the billions of airline miles that go and use every year and all those points and those rewards and the cashback, all of that that you're getting,

it's not because the credit card companies just think, oh, we just really are loving people and we're going to just serve you and reward you for spending all this money. They're not doing it out of the goodness of their heart. They're doing it because they're making a crap ton of money off of interest of other people and other people that are probably struggling financially

and turning to credit cards thinking it's their only way out and because of them that they can't pay their credit card bill and they are paying interest making the credit card companies and banks more money, in turn, they're able to give you money. So you're actually getting rewards because other people are mismanaging their money. Ugh, not fun. So I just don't want to be a part of the toxic money culture in that industry at all. I don't want to be a part of them at all.

So for me, I use a debit card. A debit card will do everything a credit card will do except get you into debts. So you are not going to be in debt when using a debit card, but you can shop online, you can book hotels, you actually can book rental car companies. Dollar rental car, there are companies that will rent you. Yes, they will rent you cars. Once and I, all the time. Rent cars, and we're fine, but a debit card is key.

All right, number two, car payments. The average car payments for a new car, get ready for this, it's $554. Average for use cars, $391. So this is what's tough for me. The car loan, mathematically speaking, like take all the emotion out of it, just mathematically speaking, it's probably the dumbest debt that you could get in because you're going into debt for something that's going down in value. So when you get a mortgage, for instance, which is the one type of debt I will not yell at you for,

you're buying a house. And in a majority of cases, over a long period of time, that house will go up in value. When you just drive a car off a car lot, you lose just tens of thousands of dollars. I mean, it's just gone. it's unbelievable, but you're borrowing money and paying interest on something that's losing value. Oh, I just hate it so much. I do. So, listen, you can keep having that car payment if you really want it. Or let's say you took that $391 car payment for your used car and invested it for 30 years at 11% return. Do you know you could retire with nearly $1.1 million? A million bucks. Instead of paying a car payment,

you invest it, and you get a million dollars. You know what you can do with a million dollars? buy a really cool new car. You can do a lot with a million dollars, I promise, but you can actually buy with cash, safe, reliable, used cars. Now, once you have a net worth of a million dollars, you can go buy a brand new car because you can take the financial hit of driving off the lot and at losing so much value.

But again, recommending reliable used cars. So I'm going to put a link in the description because we talk more about that. Because I want you to live like no one else, so later you can live and give and drive like no one else. Number three, another mistake people make that is ruining their finances is not budgeting. In our survey of American finance is conducted here at Ramsey Solutions, only 50% of respondents had done a budget in the last year. Listen, if you're not budgeting, you're not controlling your

money. In fact, you're probably wasting a lot of money. When you can be diligent and say, okay, I'm going to tell every dollar where to go, even if it's mundane. Okay, I was talking to one of our friends about this like two weeks ago. And he said, I just work really hard. And I just don't want to look at every single dollar I spend. It's just, it's just not worth it. And I thought, oh, man, man, like, no matter the income you make, no matter the expenses you make, you guys, no matter what, you need to be budgeting. Now, once you're on Baby Step 7, if you kind of want to loosen the strings, make bigger bulks in your budget and not, you know, every single Amazon, maybe everything's lumped together. You can be a little bit more. Okay, yeah, about it. Sure. If you want,

I guess. But you need to be intentional. Like, you need to be able to say, okay, this is a big part of our money that we're spending on this month. This is the amount we're going to spend it on. Or here, this, all the category, you need to be intentional. Because in the same survey, budgeters, ones who are budgeting, are more likely to say that they're better off financially than they were a year ago. Because they have a plan because they're living on purpose. Number four, whole life insurance. Dun, dun, done. Okay, whole life insurance is known as the of permanent life insurance, which means you have it in place for your entire life, which I understand kind of sounds nice, like, oh, yeah, I'll have life insurance forever. But listen, if you're working

this plan and you're out of debt and you're investing and your home is paid for on baby step six and you start, you know, doing everything, you're going to be self-insured eventually. So the idea of having life insurance for your entire life is unnecessary. Now, for whole life insurance, in the beginning, you and the insurance company will decide your policy amounts and what they call the death benefits. So this is the sum that will be paid to your loved ones or your beneficiaries when you die. When you pay your premium, which is really expensive, one chunk of it goes to the policy. The other chunk is applied to what's called a cash value account, which is like an investment, but at a really crappy interest rate. The rate of return is really low. It's not good. It's not a good

investment. And so there's all kinds of stipulations. Like if you die too soon, if you don't die soon enough, the company gets to keep the cash value account and your family never sees it. You're putting money in an investment. If you die or don't die soon enough or something happens, it's gone. It's crazy. I mean, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that should not be true. And so what you have to remember is that your life insurance and your investments need to be separate. They need to be separate. Insurance is over here and your investments is in a totally different space. Okay, keep them separate. So what do you, what? What do you do if you have whole life insurance? Well, you go to term life insurance. It is 10 times

cheaper than any whole life insurance policy that you're going to see out there. And you can buy life insurance for a specific amount of time, just like 20 years or 30 years. You get a policy that pays out 10 to 12 times your annual income and coverage. And as you guys know, I always recommend Zander term life insurance. Zander saves you the time because they shop all the rates for you. and they save you money by presenting you the best value for your unique situation. So make sure to get in touch with Xander at zander.com. All right, last but not least, the last mistake that people make is not talking about money. Listen, I know it can be awkward.

If you're not used to it, it can't be a weird conversation. And it's like, oh, I don't really even know how to engage it. I don't know. So you're going to stumble, you're going to make mistakes. But press in, talk about it. Conversations around money are so valuable. specifically if you're married, and if you're not having someone in your life, you can talk to about this. 99% of millionaires said that they have a long-term plan for their money, which means if you want to be successful,

you have to think, okay, what are the things I'm doing for the long term? So setting goals. And if you're married, setting goals together. It's going to bond you guys, unite you guys, when you are working towards the same goal. But in order to do that, you have to talk about money. If you have kids, talk to them about work, about giving, saving, and spending. and generosity and contentment. Talk about this stuff. You don't have to say, okay, here's how much money we make. I'm not saying tactically all the time, but say, hey, let's have a conversation with what money is.

What role does money play in our lives? Have those conversations with people in your life, you guys. Learn to talk about money because it is a shamed, filled subject. And when you can say things into the light, that shame goes away because most people struggle with the same things you struggle with. So talking about it is so, so good. All right. I hope I helped you understand how to avoid so many of these money mistakes that are costing people

so much in the long term. So guys, you can do this. You don't have to make all these mistakes. You can make changes in your life as of today. Easter is a big deal for our family. We love it. So whether it's the traditions of the Easter Egg Hunt or the Easter baskets that they get on Sunday morning, it's all so fun. But also, we try to be really intentional with teaching our kids what Easter really is. is all about. And that is why I love Minnow. It's a Christian streaming service created just for kids. So there are so many Easter episodes that talk about the Easter story and there's even an Easter family devotional. And Minow gives me all the tools I need to help answer my kids' questions and

talk to them about the good news. So celebrate the Easter story in a new way with your family and download the Minow app or visit gomino.com. That's G-O-M-I-N-N-O-com and enter Rachel. at checkout to get your first month for free. I'm so excited because we have a guest on that if you told me like three months ago that he was going to be a guest, I would have thought you're crazy. But it's Academy Award winner and now New York Times bestselling author Matthew McConaughey. Matthew, welcome to the show. Hi, Rachel. Good to be here.

Thanks for being here. Okay, we were just talking right before we started. But the book, your newest book, Green Lights, it is so, so good. I mean, I read it in two days. I couldn't put it down. and I was reading it at night too, and I just started laughing through half of it. And my husband was like, what are you laughing at? And I would just, like, read him these excerpts because I was like, this is the funniest thing ever.

But I want to know, so what caused you to read it? I'm sorry, to write it, because those of you that haven't read it, all the viewers watching, probably want to know what it's about and why you decided to write it. Well, I've been keeping journals since I was 14 years old, so for 37 years now, 35, when I started writing the book. And for the past 15 years, I've been threatening like, oh, let's go away with all those journals and see if there's something worth sharing. But I didn't have the courage to do it. Finally, a couple years ago, I was like, you know what? You just keep passing the buck, McConaughey.

You keep just putting it off thinking that. My thought was, oh, no, when you die, Camilla, my wife can maybe look through there. And if there's something worth sharing, she'll share it, which was a cop out. So finally, I said, and with her help, hey, let's get out of here and just go off a lot. with those journals somewhere for a few weeks alone and see what you got. And I went away and found stories, people, places, prescriptions, poems, prayers, and a whole lot of bumper stickers. And there were stacks of these. Those were sort of the eight themes, seven or eight themes in it. And then through those categories, I found this theme of green lights, found ways that

I had engineered green lights in my life, green lights being freedom in the future. They say go. They proceed, carry on your way. We like green lights in our life, you know. I also saw red and yellow lights my life. Death of my father, red light. There's hardships, crises, yellow lights, moments of pause, moments of tragedy, moments of crisis. And I found that, those red and yellows, even though I didn't want them, and they heard at the time, they revealed themselves to have greenlight assets in the future.

They had lessons for me to learn in the future. So, you know, the red and yellow is we don't want them, but we sometimes need them. And I also found a certain way that I approach things, sometimes successfully, sometimes unsuccessfully, that helped me create more green lights in my life. And so. So good. What I wrote about. Well, I can tell you from a girl in Nashville who obviously just knows you as the actor, when I heard people reading your book, like, you have to read this book. And I was like, okay. So when I finally picked it up and read it, I was like, I mean, I had no clue. number one, your story. I didn't even really know your marital status. I didn't know much about

your personal life, just really your movies. So it was so refreshing just to kind of dig into the human part of you and who you are and the wisdom and the life that you bring, which I just love so much. And so on the show, we talk about life. We talk about money, but a lot of the people viewing it are moms. They're working outside the home and really just trying to create a better life for themselves. And so one of the things we talk about on the show a lot is that more is caught than taught as parents, our kids are watching us. Our example is so huge in every part of our lives. So I want to know from you,

what are a couple of things that you caught on from your parents? I know you read a lot about it in the book. Some lessons in life that you took with you as an adult that you learned from your parents. And what are things you hope your kids are catching from you? I always have been asked, like tell me about the love that you and your family had growing up. And I always tell these stories of when we were disciplined,

which sometimes, or they seem to be horrific stories because they involved the belt or what have you. But what my parents were really trying to instill, whether you agree with the means, what they were doing it or not, was extremely valuable. I got my first butt-whip for not answering to my name.

My second one for saying, I hate you to my brother. My third one for saying, I can't start the lawnmower. And my fourth for lying. And the values that they were instilling in that were, it felt pretty obvious then. Oh, these are life lessons they want me to learn. So what's the antonyms of those? Well, don't hate.

Love. Don't say can't. Don't believe you can't. But understand that you can be having trouble getting something done. And tell the truth, don't lie. Those are three great valuable lessons to send a child into the world with that help make up who they are. Now, I go about trying to teach my children those in different ways than my mom and dad did, but I still inherently really want them to understand those things and have those be a part of their life

and understand the importance of those. You know, stuff that was caught, seeing how you could not hold a grudge in our family. Even my mom and dad, and they had some fights that would be considered violent, the love was never questioned. The love was never in question. It was never going to be broken. So the love was never in question. We heard it a lot in our family.

I love you. I just don't like you right now. Classic line, right? I think we've all used that. So good. And well, what I like about all of that, though, is it's focusing with your kids on the character side. And I feel like in 2021 right now, with Americans and the way not only they handle their money,

but even their family stuff and materialism is now become the priority. I mean, it's what can I get my kids? what can I buy, what can I get them. And it almost has trumped the character qualities of what you instill in your kids so that when they go off on their own, they can hold their own. So when it comes to all of that, I mean, you became a minimalist. Basically, you know, throughout your book, I read that. And I love that because I love that whole idea of just kind of stripping everything away

and say, okay, this is the life we're living and not focusing on all the materialism. But a lot of people think, well, if I just had more stuff, if I just had more money, if I just had more success, I would be happy. what would you say to that person? Look, I mean, and some people aren't going to want to hear this out there, but we have to admit that retail therapy is not the answer. We have to admit that moving to the bigger house, and again, I've got nothing wrong with the bigger house.

I've got nothing wrong with buying those things. We've got nothing wrong with fame. I've got nothing wrong with money and being rich. Nothing at all. I'm a fan of those things. But they're tools. And they're actually sublimation. sometimes. They don't really affect our happiness as much as we think they're going to.

And I've traveled the world and I've seen poor, what considered poor families without electricity, who were sustaining living off of what they had planted in their garden yesterday to eat today or what have you, that were much more happy than billionaires I've been around that had more toll. than everything else. Now, what are those times for me, because I live in a fluent life, we've got a nice house, my pantry's full, our kids go to a good school, et cetera.

But at the very least, I know when I go off on those minimalist trips, I have a greater respect for the things that I have now in my life. Yeah. We try to teach our kids to go see, let's go without, to then come back and see

what maybe we were taken for granted to have gratitude for. So good. And those things, you know, if it's all retail therapy and it's just about having more, more, more, more, more, more. We're kind of hamsters on the wheel. I mean, where are we going? It doesn't fulfill us like we think it will. Yes, which I think it's powerful to hear from you, honestly, though, because I always talk about how it's okay to have nice stuff.

Just only your nice stuff have you. And when it starts to own you in so many aspects, it's so hard. And you could have, you know, I mean, you're Matthew McConnell. So I'm like hearing that, though, out of your mouth. I'm like, yes, that's the truth. Like, that is what it is. And we live in a culture that we chase and chase and chase and chase. And that finish line just will keep moving if that's where you're trying to put your happiness and your identity.

Well, and it's what are we chasing? We all want to be relative, but we forget to ask ourselves relative for what? Yep. My mother-in-law is a great phrase, which is like what you said a minute ago. She said, sometimes we have et cetera. And sometimes et cetera has us. That's it. That's it.

It can have us. It can be wagging us. And you look around and you're going like, man, I'm trying to tend to these hundred things. And I really don't care. Well, maybe get rid of some things and say, I write about it in my book about when I said no and shut down the production company and the music company. I said, I feel like I'm making Cs and five things in my life. And I want to get rid of two so I feel like I can maybe make A's and three. I love that.

Okay. You and Camilla, how long have you guys been married now? How many years? Eight. Years. Okay. Okay. So money and marriage, it's a big discussion.

Money fights, money problems. I mean, it's a big part of marriage. So for you guys, when it comes to money, do you guys make money decisions together? Do you have conversations about it? Like, what does it look like in the McConaughey household? We both come from pretty humble beginning. She comes from, she's a farm girl from Bella Horizonti in Brazil. I'm a middle-class, blue-collar,

or from Uvaldi, Texas. So we both very much have a great respect for the dollar. Neither one of us pass a penny and don't pick it up to this day. Okay? So when it comes to, you know, money, we discuss the larger stuff. We, and is that a want or a need? oh, let's see if it's a need.

I want to be more than, more than just a want. We've been just as happy living in my airstream on the road with the kids as we have been in our house. That doesn't mean I want to get rid of the house. But back to your character question, we were just as happy. And you could argue sometimes even happier because we were just on top of each other, you know. We make choices, we don't, we make choices where we go, what's not going to change our quality of life? I don't, you know, I've accumulated enough wealth to go,

okay, I can live this lifestyle, and there's nothing else extravagant I want out there, and I want to live it where I don't, you know, I'm still excited about going and filling up my car with super unleaded and going, fill it up, super. It wasn't that long ago, I was like on regular unleaded going, I just need half a tank. I don't have, you know, let me check my cash.

So, you know, I don't sweat those things or, you know, it's fun to go down to supermarket, go down every aisle. You know, every single aisle and go, we're going to get what we want and need here. We're going to fill our pantry. It's fun to be able to do that. So good. Well, number one, the fact you guys even talk about money is huge. And I think that's a good example for people because some people just, they don't. They run on two separate tracks.

And you even saying we, a lot of married couples deal with their money completely separate. And one of the things I always try to encourage them is work together as a team when it comes. to money. And so hearing that, even you saying we versus her or I, I mean, like, those, those things are so, so key, I think, in creating a wholesome marriage and mindset. So thanks for letting me kind of dig into that. Okay, so one line you used a couple of times in the book that I loved, and I want you to explain it to the viewers is less impressed, more involved. And I underlined it and flapped a couple pages with it, because I thought that is so good. So explain what that means. Yeah. So there's things that we have reverence.

for fame, money, people, places in our future attainable, maybe not attainable, but we have a certain reverence for. Now, we're so impressed with them that when we're faced with them, we're not able to be actually involved with them. That woman or that man that we put on such a pedestal. That when we're together, we're not actually able to be ourselves and give of ourselves because we have them up on such a pedestal. And it's not only unfair to ourselves, it's unfair to them because they can't live up to it. If I think Camilla is Wonder Woman and she thinks I'm Mr. Incredible, neither one of us can live

up to that. It's unfair to each other. Now, we should have great respect for each other. An athlete, pitcher gets pulled out of the bullpen. Ninth inning, World Series. He's dreamed of this moment. But if he's so impressed with this moment and not involved with how I'm going to get the next three

guys out at the plate, he's not going to have a good outing because he's not going to actually be present. He won't be involved in it. He'll have too much reference for it. The moment will be bigger than him. Keep the respect for it. But if you're faced with it,

be able to look it in the eye and go, I've earned the right to be here. I am here. It's live. I'm in this. I'm going to give up myself, of my truest self, and be able to receive hopefully this moment or this person's true of self back. Be less impressed, more involved. I love that. So, so good. Well, there are a couple of quotes I wrote down. I'm not going to say them all. But kind of this principle, so tell me if I'm wrong, if I translated it in my head differently, you had a couple of principles in the book that came to choice and that if you think you can or you think you can't, you're right and you reap what you sow, this idea of planting.

things on the surface, right? Like going in and doing the hard work, would you say you agree overall with that principle and what does that look like in your life and people watching that really you have choices in your life and making those choices can better your life or set you back? Well, that's inherently one of the themes from greenlights. We can engineer green lights in our future by the choices we make today. You know, we like to make a contradiction and think that responsibility and freedom or like sometimes opposition. But they're not.

They're actually completely entwined. We are responsible for our freedom. We can take responsibilities today that grant us more freedom in the future, give us more greenlights in the future. If I'm going to, you know, see you and when you get up out of the chair and you and you and I are in the room and you left your purse there and I steer your wallet,

Well, I maybe immediately got some cash maybe I needed. But have I really bought myself a green light in the future? No, because now every time I'm in Rachel City, everywhere I go, I'm looking over the shoulder. My shoulder going, I hope Rachel's not here because she probably noticed that her wallet was gone. Now I've created stress in my life. I've bought my free time in the future. I created less freedom for me in the future. So it's a lot about delayed gratification, understanding that the choices we make today

are compounding assets in our future and to be able to see further down the line and see how the choices we make today, responsibilities we choose to take or don't take. Have consequences. Check in with yourself who yourself is five years from now, 10 years from now and have a look back when you're struggling with a choice.

Go, well, what would myself 10 years from now think about this? How's that going to land? Is it going to be something that promotes more growth in health and truth for me and my loved ones or less? you know, just know that it has compounding assets. We can engineer green lights. I'll also say this, though, but it's a fun thing about the green lights.

The art of catching the green lights is what do you do with the yellow? The caution, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes a yellow light's there for us because, you know what, we need to slow down. We need a red light. We need to pause.

Take some introspection, check in with ourselves. We need that intervention. We need that pause. Sometimes, though, catching the green lines about approaching that yellow light and going, I ain't giving that crisis credit. I'm putting the pedal to the metal and blowing right through this light. You know what I mean?

Because we're getting ruts sometimes. We're slowing down at too many yellow lights. And we're making mountains out of molehills and dwelling in our red light. Oh, whoa, be me. And you're creating crises where maybe, you should have just blown by that. I didn't even give that credit. Put the pedal down, drive through that one. Other times, it's like, no, I need to heed this yellow.

I need to slow down, take a pause. Yeah, and back to what you were saying earlier, though, I'm like, you have to be present enough in your life and your situation and your relationships to know in the yellow light to discern, do I speed up or do I slow down, right? And so to be aware, to be in your life and aware, which is so great. And I understand what you really value. Yes. what you really value and those that list of things we value in our life and what order they're in,

those change in our life. They're different for young men and women before they have a family. The value meter changes. Things take different priorities as we grow through life and that's fine. But, you know, ask yourself, what is it that I really value that I'm growing here in my life? So good. So, so much wisdom. And seriously, it's all in the book, you guys.

Green Lights by Matthew McCona. Okay, can I ask you one, like, semi-people magazine question? Absolutely. Since I have you. Okay, out of all your movies, Matthew, what's like the one that you look back on that was the most fun to shoot? Like on set, with the people, the storyline, the character, all of it. Like, what's the one that you're like, yes, that was really fun? Well, I got to go back to my very first one day is confused. Yes. I have written lines in that. And I ended up working. three weeks. So I'm coming to set in the summer of 92, Austin, Texas. And it was one of the greatest summers of my life. And I did not know at that time if that was a one-off hobby.

If that was going to be like one thing I did that summer of 92, and then I went off and did something else in my life. And here it is 29 years later, and it's turned into a career that I love. Started off in one summer, summer night in Austin, Texas, 1992. Okay. In order for for all that to happen, though, you would say that there's a level of confidence and awareness that you, you kind of charged in there. Like you, you had some, you're proactive in the situation, right? So there's a level, a lesson for that for people of like, yeah, when you engage a situation, you're going to look a whole lot different than if you kind of just sit back and let things happen to you. I was incredibly impressed to be there, but I realized then right then, oh, you better be involved.

Oh. Yeah, that's it. I'm saying we have to be more than just happy to be here. When we're in a moment or that's of good fortune or something goes well, we have to be more than, I'm all for gratitude. But gratitude does not mean a false modesty or a not giving ourselves enough credit to go, no, let's get in this. Let's look this situation in the eye and do what I need to do and focus on what it is I need to do.

So yeah, I've had some been the right place, right time, but also taken some opportunities when they showed up for sure. For sure. Take an initiative. I love it. Well, Matthew, thank you, honestly, so much for stopping by. I really, really appreciate it. It was an honor. And again, everyone, it's Greenlight. It's such a good book. So, so good. So guys, pick it up. Anywhere, books are sold. And thanks again, Matthew. I appreciate it. Rachel. Thank you all. This episode, I want to answer one of your questions. And we're going to talk about how to get on the same page with your spouse, which is a question a lot of people have. So this comes from Jared. And he said, my wife and I are on babysept two. I actually doubled up our emergency fund recently because my wife hasn't been able to keep a job. Every time I get motivated and start to get her on board, something happens where she loses her job. She's had seven jobs within the last year. She's about to start a new job, but I'm nervous because if I get sick or hurt, we'll be okay for a little bit and then I don't know.

How do I get my wife more on board? We have paid off some of our debt and have about $17,000 left. Well, number one, congratulations on paying down some of your debt. That's amazing. And at $17,000, it's like right there. Like you can still track forward and get that done for sure. Now, my question would be, Jared, I wish I had you on the phone with me so we could have a conversation about it. But I don't know how much your wife isn't on board on getting out of debt or budgeting or what part of that.

But it sounds more like the issue is her keeping her job. So I would ask the question, okay, why? why does she keep losing her job? Is it her something she's doing? Is it the industry that she's in? Is it the types of companies she's choosing to work for and they're closing their doors? Like, I'm curious why she can't keep that job

because, again, if it's an industry problem, then maybe you say, okay, let's just shift industries. Let's go look and see if I can do something else on the side for a little bit while we get out of debt and kind of make these sacrifices so we can have that solid financial foundation. Or if it's something that she's doing, if it's her problem, digging into that

and understanding because money flows two ways. It flows in and it flows out. So you can cut your lifestyle back as much as possible, but also that income coming in is going to help you get that traction. And so, again, her having that job that you guys are used to having that income, it's really important for her to have unless you just kind of restructure and say, okay, maybe she does stay home if you have kids and that's really what she wants. And so for this time, maybe you do just live off of your income and you have to reprioritize and figure it out. So that would be the main thing. But for other people that are struggling to get their spouse on board,

you have to understand that, you know, we all have different tendencies. We all have different money personalities. So naturally, one of you is going to be like hard driving, loving the idea of getting out of debt and living on a budget. Like it's like up your alley. You feel the traction. You see the success.

And then usually another spouse who is like, I don't know, I'm just not as passionate about that. So you're going to have these kind of different personalities, which is very, very normal. But the key here is that neither one of you are just sitting back and just spectating and watching everything play out. But you're actually involved, both of you. Now, one of you might be way more intensely involved because you love it and you're going to look at numbers every night. And the other one is involved, may not always just be as passionate or love it as much as the other spouse.

And that's okay. So there's going to be degrees on how much passion you have in this process. So some people are like, my wife's not on board. But we're budgeting together and getting out of debt together. But she doesn't want to look at my Excel sheet every night. I'm like, okay, she's on board. Come on. Let's give her a little grace. Now, other people are fully not on board. Like, you are running on two separate tracks. So if that's the case and you're trying to get out of debt but your spouse keeps racking up credit card

debt, that's going to be a problem. So having communication around your why, this is a big first step. Why do you want financial stability? Is it out of security purposes? You want to know that you're going to be okay of something where to happen to you. Jared, this sounds like you. Or is it more, yeah, I want to get out of debt so that I can finally sleep at night. Or I want my kids to grow up in a household where they can understand how money works and they don't have to make the mistakes that we made. Or we're doing this so that we can take that yearly vacation. We want to take every year with our family and do it with cash.

Like, what's your why? Figure out your why. And then communicate that to your spouse. Because again, it's not just, I just want to get a bunch of money and pile up a bunch of stuff. Because if that's the case, you can just go into debt and pile up a bunch of stuff. But why is it that you want this freedom? why is it that you want to be out of debt and you want to be intentional? So that Y is really big.

And then I always tell spouses, usually if the husband's not on board to tell the wife, show him practically, here's what this looks like, listing out all of your debts, smallest large, just on a sheet of paper and doing the math and saying, okay, if we put X amount towards this debt, we can have it paid off in two months. And then if we take all that money and do it by the next smallest debt, we can have it paid off in six months. Like having goals and seeing it visually is so helpful versus. this idea of, okay, let's just never go out to eat and never go on vacation. That doesn't sound like a fun plan. There has to be a reward on the back end.

In fact, Charles Duhigg talks about this, that when you change your money habits, you have to have a reward and incentive on the other side. So whether it's seeing that checking account or that savings account, click up, and you're like, yes, yes, our savings, our emergency fund, I see it. And that feels good. That's a reward to you. Or maybe another type of reward, I don't know. But to say together, okay, we're going to reach these goals, we're going to work towards something so that my reward, financial freedom, stability, peace, all of that is fulfilled. So that's kind of what I would say. And again, this is a hard thing, you guys. I mean, relationships can be so messy. You all come from different

backgrounds. You view money kind of differently. You all have different habits, different tendencies, but learning to work together as a team, empathizing and respecting each other. Please, I just see so many spouses and they just, they just throw their husband under the bus or the husband just keeps nagging the wife of all the mistakes she made and how much she spends. I mean, oh my goodness, take a deep breath and realize, okay, how do we communicate effectively

and lovingly because you are a team. You are a team and money seems to get in the middle of so many people, so many spouses, like sits right here and you're, like, fighting it. Like, set it across the room and, like, lock arms and say, okay, we're fighting this thing together because we are a team. It's not me against you,

us against that. Make that the bad guy, even though money, eh, same moral. It's not good or bad, but for this instance, it can be bad and say, no, we're going after you. That debt, we're getting you out, but making it a team effort is one of the best things you can do. Because what's beautiful about this is it bleeds over into other areas of your life. When you can do this with your money, you actually learn how to communicate well. So when in-law situations come up, you actually can communicate respectfully about it. When you're raising kids and one of them disciplines them a way you don't like, you're like, okay, let's talk about that. I want to know about that. I mean, you end up using all of these skills in every aspect of your marriage. So it's a great thing,

and it's a great thing to be unified on. And again, winning financially in the long term is not really going to happen on you're on two separate tracks, but coming together and agreeing on your money and being unified is so important. And one way to do that is to sign up for Ramsey Plus. This is our subscription model. And it is amazing because inside of Ramsey Plus, you get financial Peace University, you get know yourself, know your money video course, all the video courses we've done, you get content in there, you get community in there, you get every dollar plus, you get the baby steps tracker, and you can have the same login as your spouse, so you guys can go in together and look and see and see your progress, and it really is a great tool to walk with you

guys through this journey of learning how to get on the same page when it comes to money. So don't miss out on that. Check it out because it really is so helpful. It's helpful for anyone, but especially if you're married, and you're trying to get that spouse on board. Hopefully this tool can help them. All right, Jared, I hope that helps you because, oh, you guys, I mean, we have multiple episodes about money in marriage, but it really is a huge, huge topic

and getting on that same page, being unified, and knowing where you're going together with your money. It is. It's so crucial. Well, I want to thank Matthew McConaughey for coming on and being a fantastic guest. And if you guys have not hit that subscribe button, make sure you do that.

And if the spirit leads, you can leave a review. All right, thanks for listening you guys to this episode. And remember to always take control of your money and create a life you love. So if you guys enjoyed this podcast, we have more from the Ramsey Network, like the Ken Coleman Show. According to a recent Gallup poll, nearly 70% of Americans are disengaged at work. If you dread going into work every Monday morning and you're just trying to make it to the weekend, the Ken Coleman show is for you. Everyone has a sweet spot. Your sweet spot is at the intersection of your greatest talent and greatest passion.

We will help you discover what it is you were born to do, and then we'll help you create a plan to make your dream job a reality. You matter, and you have what it takes. Join the conversation on the Ken Coleman Show. To hear full episodes, just search Ken Coleman wherever you listen to podcasts, or go to Ken Coleman Show.com.