The Ramsey Show - Don’t Let a Disaster Dictate Your Financial Reality
Episode Date: June 11, 2024💵 Sign-up for EveryDollar today - The simplest way to budget for your life! Dr. John Delony & George Kamel answer your questions and discuss: What to do when you second guess your life choices, ...Mutual funds vs. index funds, "Should I save for a house or for a business?" Slowing down the debt payoff when life happens, "Should I break my lease if I can't afford my rent?" Support Our Sponsors: BetterHelp Yrefy NetSuite Zander Insurance Next Steps 📞 Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 Weekdays from 2-5pm ET or click here! 📄 Will an online will work for you? 🏠 Find a Ramsey Trusted Real Estate Agent 🚢 The Live Like No One Else Cruise is booking fast! Listen to more from Ramsey Network 🎙️ The Ramsey Show 🧠 The Dr. John Delony Show 🍸 Smart Money Happy Hour 💡 The Rachel Cruze Show 💸 The Ramsey Show Highlights 💰 George Kamel 💼 The Ken Coleman Show 📈 EntreLeadership Learn more about your ad choices. https://www.megaphone.fm/adchoices Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy
Transcript
Discussion (0)
What's going on?
This is John and my good friend George Camel and this is the Ramsey Show live from Nashville,
Tennessee where we talk to people about their money, their relationships, their mental and emotional health, their work, just about any and everything.
We're taking your calls live, 888-825-5225, 888-825-5225, and we're going to go out to
Redding, Pennsylvania, and talk to Anton to get this show going this afternoon.
What's up, Anton?
How are we doing?
Good. How are you guys?
Outstanding, brother.
Is it Anton?
Yes, Anton.
I had a sneaking suspicion.
Oh, great. Sorry, Anton.
Just want to respect the name.
That's all good.
Can you guys hear me okay?
Yeah, we got you, man.
Sound great.
What's going on?
Awesome.
So I wanted a little advice on a situation I got going on.
So I run my own business, and it's been going really well.
But two weeks ago, I had a seizure, which my heart stopped beating for a little bit and I stopped breathing.
And when I came to and I'm healthy, it kind of made me reevaluate every decision I've made, every decision I'm making.
And, you know, the best thing to do is leave my wife in a good situation in case anything happens. Wow. Have they worked through
what happened? Have they been able to give you some clarity on what your body's doing?
Yeah. So I pretty much had a severe panic attack that was brought on by some previous trauma and
my body pretty much just decided
to shut down and they said, Hey, that's it. You're going to have a seizure now.
And we're out. What's the, what's the trauma that your body was replaying?
It's some prior PTSD from some family stuff that happened with my brother.
Fortunately, he's doing great now, but it's just things that I have to live with.
Okay. Did this happen out of the blue or was there family stuff going on that started a
domino effect that ended with this collapse?
You know, surprisingly, it was a scene in a movie. And the scene was pretty much exactly
what I lived. My brain told myself, this could be a problem. You can handle it. And sure
enough, I couldn't handle it.
Gotcha. So what's been the follow-up?
So, I mean, I'm healthy now, which is good. My brain's a little rattled. And, you know,
I have a business where I build custom fish ponds and I breed high-end koi fish. And the business
is great. Things are doing good. But, you know, after that, I was like, oh man, you know, my time on here could be, you know, limited at any moment, provably, like if it's time to go,
it's time to go. So I was thinking about, you know, what do I, what do I do with my business
if I were to go and, you know, my wife can't do what I do. Um, I have money and investments and
things like that, which she can have, but I'm trying to figure out if I maybe pivot to something
that's more, you know, palatable for her to be able to run if something happens to
me and I sell my business, or if I just keep going and pack money away and, you know, get
ourselves in a better situation. Can I challenge you a bit, Anton? Absolutely. Anytime we have
a moment where we feel like we're betrayed by our own body, when it lets us down, whether it's an anxiety response or a panic attack response or a heart attack or a stroke or an aneurysm, there's that, the foundation of our life gets shaken, right?
It feels like the sidewalk we were walking on is suddenly cracked and it's not safe to walk on anymore because the one thing we could always count on was our bodies right yep and when family relationships are screwy when neighborhoods when when finances
when politicians what i can count on me and then your body said and we're out right yep yep so
times of reflection after that are really really important because you're right yeah you have to
peer over the edge and be like,
oh man, our life is fragile and it's quick
and it's short.
And you can also take reflection
a little bit too far
and you can respond to this type of
kind of shaking of the snow globe
with an entirely anxious response,
which is what you're doing
because here's what you're doing.
You're now starting to plan for problems in the future that are, aren't real. Oh yeah. The fight or
flight telling me to, you know, flight. Right. And so you are trying to flee from your present
reality. And so what you're going to do is you're trying to live into the future, into a,
create a job in the present that one day your wife will carry on without you because you're
going to die young. And then you want to make to make sure she dude you're now you're inventing stories to try to solve in
the present as a way to not deal with you've been through a lot haven't you yeah uh i grew up with
nothing abusive household you know dug ourselves out and like things were finally going great.
And then this happened and I just felt like that little kid again of being out of control
and it's scary.
Okay.
But when you came to, tell me about your marriage.
Oh, marriage is great.
I mean, we've been through a lot.
Hold on.
Don't, don't qualify.
Don't qualify it.
You've been qualifying your whole life.
Your marriage is good.
Okay.
Fair enough.
Marriage is good. You love the woman you're married. Your marriage is good? Okay, fair enough. Marriage is good?
You love the woman you're married to?
Absolutely, 100%.
She loves you?
Absolutely.
Do you have little ones?
No.
What's the state of your finances?
Finances are good.
We have been paying off debts.
I only have about $10,000 left,
and I took my house from 30 years to holy
death and only having four years left on it. So we are sitting pretty for our age.
How old are you?
I am 26.
Awesome. Do you have life insurance in place?
I don't. It was something that I was in the middle of working on and the paperwork should
be started soon, but I was listening to Ramsey a lot and
kind of figuring out, you know, all of that. And so we were looking at some options, um,
that kind of follow the Ramsey plan a little more. Please do it today. As soon as you're off the
phone, contact our friends that go to Xander.com and get a term life quote, 10 to 12 times your
annual income, 15 to 20 year term should be great for you. But that's going to give you the real peace of mind you're looking for of the,
like, what if something happens to me?
It's not going to be the business.
It's how is she going to pay the bills for the next 20 years?
Yeah.
And so that's something I would do today to give you a little bit more peace as
you figure out what's next.
Yeah.
And if you're, if you're following the Ramsey plan,
we'll tell everybody to get life insurance.
You got to, you got to, you got to. um you're gonna have to go through some extra testing probably
that's just par for the course cool just head right into it but here's what I want you to see
your body immediately took you back to when you were 12 years old and getting beat up in your own
home right yep and then when you came to you came to in the present where you're a great husband and you're a hard worker and you've transformed your family's future financial situation.
Yep.
And one of the things our bodies does is it just replays those old stories until we can show it that we weren't safe then, but we're safe now.
Yeah.
And so you mentioned early in the call, you're all good now.
I'm going to tell you, brother, you're not.
But you're also in a remarkable position to now go get the healing that you need to do.
Right.
And my goal for you is not that you can undo what happened in your kid because you
can't but you'll be able to think about it you'll be able to watch a movie scene and your body won't
drag you back 20 years back to hell it will remember and you'll go and your heart rate will
go up a little bit but you'll recognize you're surrounded by a woman who loves you the family
who's with you now you're safe financially you got team, you got a gang, and so on and so forth.
Does that make sense?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
It makes sense.
I just needed to talk through it, man.
No, you got it.
And I'm proud of you for saying it out loud.
You want to quit your job, quit your job.
Don't quit your job because 20 years from now,
you might drop dead,
and your wife's going to not want to carry on a koi business.
Right?
And my guess is you love what you do.
I think you love raising
fish and you love creating
ponds. That's amazing. That's awesome.
Continue to build that business.
Build that business so big that the pile of
money you leave your wife, she won't have to work.
Then she can sell it to some
other young guy who's creating
his life moving forward. Man, you're on the
right path. Your healing journey starts right now. This is The Ramsey Show.
This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. This is the season for Halloween. It's October. We're
wearing costumes and we're wearing masks. If you haven't started planning your costume yet,
get on it. And while you're thinking about it, I want you to be honest. A lot of us hide ourselves. We hide our true selves
behind costumes and masks all the time. We do this at work. We do this around our friends. We do this
around our families. We even do this when we look at ourselves in the mirror. I know because I've
been there multiple times in my life and it's the worst. If you feel like you're stuck hiding behind masks
and costumes all the time,
if you find yourself hiding from your true self,
I want you to consider talking with a therapist.
Therapy is a place where you can be honest,
where you can talk to somebody else and reflect and learn
and you can accept all the parts of yourself over time
and start living an authentic life.
Masks and costumes should be for Halloween parties,
not for our emotions and our true selves.
And if you're considering therapy,
try calling my friends at BetterHelp.
BetterHelp is 100% online therapy.
You can talk with your therapist anywhere
so it's convenient for you and your schedule.
Just fill out a short online survey
and you'll be matched with a licensed therapist.
Plus, you can switch therapist at any time
for no additional cost.
Take off the costumes and take off the mask
with BetterHelp.
Visit betterhelp.com slash Diloni
to get 10% off your first month.
That's betterhelp.com slash Diloni.
Welcome back to The Ramsey Show.
I'm John Deloney, joined by George Campbell, 888-825-5225.
That's 888-825-5225.
Selling a house the Ramsey way makes home ownership something to celebrate,
not something that ruins every part of your life.
The Ramsey Trusted Program is the only way to find an agent that you can trust to keep you on track
with what we teach here at Ramsey. And here's the deal, to get you the best offer on your house or
find the right house for you. Nothing is worse than having a real estate agent who's pressuring you
to buy a house that you can't afford or is at the top, top, top
end of your budget that's making you queasy, but they got to get the sale and they want to get
their number. Ramsey trusted agents don't do that. They walk with you. They know what you're trying
to accomplish and they know that you want to get a house and you want to have peace inside that
home. We send you the top agents in your area, folks that we trust, that we use in our homes,
in our lives.
You can review their stats.
You can interview them.
You can decide which one you want to work with.
Ramsey Trusted Agents have years of experience and will help you make wise decisions when it comes to pricing, marketing, and making or choosing the right offer.
Find a Ramsey Trusted Real Estate Agent for free.
It doesn't cost you anything.
Just go to Ramseyysolutions.com slash
agent. All right, let's go out to Charlotte, North Carolina and talk to M-A-T-T. What's up,
Matt? How we doing? Good. How are you? We're partying, brother. How can we help, man?
So I sort of have like one question. So I'm not like an avid watcher of the Ramsey show,
but I see a lot of clips online
where you guys talk about mutual funds
and investing in mutual funds.
I was wondering,
why do you recommend mutual funds over index funds?
Great question, man.
How old are you?
21.
Lovely.
And are you investing right now?
Yeah, I've been investing since I was 15.
Oh, my goodness.
Dude, that's amazing.
Who taught you that?
My dad taught me a little bit, and I read about it.
Nice.
That's awesome.
What have you been investing in for the past six years?
So I was doing, like, mostly index funds,
but I like to play around, do some stock picks. But obviously, not a big portion of my portfolio goes towards that.
Okay. Are you working full-time?
Yeah, I'm in marketing.
Nice. That's amazing.
Okay, and how much are you investing as a percentage of your gross household income?
Probably like 25, 30%.
Oh my goodness. Okay. So you're going to be a multimillionaire regardless of this conversation that happens next. Can we agree on that?
Yeah.
Where do you live, Matt?
Right outside of Charlotte.
No, no, no. do you have your own house?
Your own apartment?
You living with mom?
Where are you living?
No.
I still live with my mom at home.
Okay.
All right.
Cool.
How much do you make a year?
Yeah.
80 to 90.
Oh, my goodness, dude.
You're crushing it.
So, we're talking, you're investing like 18,000 a year.
Yeah.
And you've got a 401k through your employer?
No, I use a Roth IRA.
Okay. So what happens after you max that out?
I just put in a regular brokerage.
Okay, great. So let's talk about index funds versus mutual funds. And for the,
for the listener's sake, if they're like, what are these goober nerds talking about?
Index funds are basically passively managed mutual funds. So still a giant group of stocks, but it's tracking an index, basically a set list of companies. Whereas the mutual funds
that are actively managed has an investment manager that is selecting the funds that make
the list. Let's go even simpler for guys like me. When you say indexed, they're indexed and they're passively managed.
So indexed, there's no one running the show.
It's just a set list.
So they pick.
I'm making these up.
The S&P 500.
There's 500 companies, the largest U.S. companies.
And if they go up, then the index fund goes up.
And if they just all go down, then the index fund kind of goes down.
And over time, we hope these companies just keep getting bigger and growing.
And then can companies fall off the S&p 500 and new ones pop in yes so the whole thing should be just going up over time exactly and so index funds means nobody's driving it's just following
whatever it's the autonomous vehicle of the investing world you like that you just ruined
it john like i know there we go excellent okay. Is that a good summary, Matt? Because you know about this stuff just as much as we do.
Yeah.
Okay.
I mean, one thing that's sort of important to note is that mutual funds sort of have built-in fees, right?
You know what I mean?
Correct.
There's built-in fees.
There's an investment manager.
There's people to pay because this is their job to run these.
So they do have fees. The perks of the
index funds, as you know, diversification, which mutual funds have, low expense ratios,
which index funds have, and predictability. And every investing rose has its thorn. For starters,
your index funds won't beat the market because it represents the market. Does that make sense?
So you'll settle for the average of the market. You can never beat it. The goal of the mutual fund is that that investment manager is picking, is hand-selecting
funds based on tons and tons of research that they're doing every day, day in and day out,
in order to attempt to beat it. So let's say the market does 10%. Well, the goal of the mutual fund
is to do 12% or 14%. Now, as we know, they won't hit that goal every year.
We don't have a crystal ball.
We can agree on that. Do you look for specifics in a mutual fund to try to hit those funds?
Because I know 80% of mutual funds don't beat the market.
No, that's actually factually incorrect.
Morningstar did this article, and they said nearly 57% of mutual funds, these
active U.S. equity funds, they beat the average index fund peer over the 12 months through June
2023. So that means six out of 10 mutual funds beat the index. Wait, over how long? Over a 12
month period. They looked at, here's what mutual funds did, here's what the peer index fund did. Six
out of 10 beat the index fund. Right, but why are you looking at a 12-month period versus like,
you know, decades? You can look at decades, and it's going to change depending on the decade you
look at. And the truth is, there's going to be mutual funds that don't beat the index,
and there's going to be years the index beats the mutual funds. And so the goal here is to
slightly beat the copycat of the stock market, which is the index fund. And so the mutual funds. And so the goal here is to slightly beat the copycat of the stock market,
which is the index fund. And so the index funds also do have a fee. You'll see it listed as a 12B1
fee. And so that kind of makes up for the fact that the mutual fund fee is there. So it's not
exactly free. And here's the thing. We're not anti-index funds. There's a time and place.
In fact, Dave Ramsey invests in index funds outside of retirement. You have that taxable brokerage account, right?
Yeah. Dave would say index funds are the smart play there because of the low turnover. They're
not moving things around as much, which makes the fees less. But in retirement, you're not having to
pay those fees because you're not worried about turnover because this is a long-term play. And
therefore, he invests in mutual funds for his retirement accounts, index funds outside of retirement. So there's a time and place for both.
What do you look for in a mutual fund, though?
Well, there's a lot of pieces of it, including rate of return, the expense ratio, what the fund
is made up of, who the fund manager is, have they switched the investment team recently?
If it's been doing great for 30 years and all of a sudden they switched the crew,
well, that's something you want to look out for because things might change.
And we actually covered this in depth, Matt, in our Investing Essentials live stream.
And it's not currently available, but just for you, I'm going to send you a link to watch that for free. How's that sound? Good. But isn't that sort of inevitable? I mean,
if a mutual fund has a 30-year history with one manager, and I'm 21, and I want to invest for
another 30 years, isn't there pretty much a guarantee that the fund manager is going to
change the fund management team? Sure. Over time, things may change, but what we're looking for is that longer-term track record.
And so we're not going to choose a fund that's been around for a year.
We prefer the one that has a track record of 10 or 15
that's had the same team with the same record of success.
But, dude, that's like saying,
I don't want to root for the Yankees or the Astros
because they're going to have different players in a few years.
The goal is you hope that they have guiding principles and they have the same desire to
win and they have the same integrity over time.
Some teams are better at integrity than others with the teams I just labeled.
I know Kelly's looking at me, not the Astros.
Kelly's upset.
But you see what I'm saying?
Like, yeah, the fund managers are going to roll over, but it will change over time.
Matt, here's the deal.
We can argue all day and I can tell you like this, but you can be a multimillionaire just from your index funds.
You don't have to ever touch a mutual fund if you don't want or going to still be friends.
You're doing great. The key is your savings rate. That's the key. That's what's holding
people back from having money. It's not the discussion of index versus mutual.
That's for another time. But for everyone else listening, just freaking invest. Be like Matt
at 21 years old, invest $18,000 a year.
You're going to have money in retirement regardless of where you put it.
And for what it's worth, George and I both put our money in mutual funds.
Call me a dummy.
And me too.
They do, George.
They call us dummies.
We'll be right back.
You know, it doesn't take a degree in statistics to realize this one stinks.
Ninety-three percent of undergraduate private student loans are co-signed. You know, it doesn't take a degree in statistics to realize this one stinks.
93% of undergraduate private student loans are co-signed.
So when you're delinquent and drowning, mom or papa or uncle Joe is stuck in that financial stress along with you.
But there is a way out.
Why refi? Why refi offers a custom refinancing option with a fixed rate loan based on your ability to pay.
And the average interest rate YRefi offers is 3.9%, which can significantly reduce your monthly payment and decrease your total cost.
Contact YRefi at 844-2-RAMSI or go to YRefi.com slash Ramsey. That's 844-2-RAMSEY or the letter Y, then refi.com slash Ramsey.
Why Refi is not licensed by the California Department of Financial Protection and Innovation.
Why Refi is not authorized by the New York State Department of Financial Services to
service any New York loans. Funding may not be available in all states.
Welcome back to The Ramsey Show. I'm John Deloney,
joined by George Campbell,
888-825-5225.
Campbell, not Campbell.
I heard Campbell.
That's the most American name out there,
George Campbell.
The B came out.
I don't even know where that came from.
It happens to the best of us.
Hey, come on.
I call you John Beloney sometimes.
You do.
It happens.
That one's on purpose, though.
That's on purpose.
Let's go out to Harrisburg,
Pennsylvania and talk to Brittany.
Hey, Brittany, what's going on?
Hi there. How are you?
Outstanding. How are you?
Good. I'm calling because my husband's employer, which is
the federal government,
is supposed to be relocating us.
Hold on. The way you said that was incredible.
My husband's employer,
pause for disdain, the federal government. What has your husband's employer done this time?
Okay. So they are relocating his department from Harrisburg, PA to Columbus, Ohio. So he is
currently making $88,000 a year. Even though we are in South
Central Pennsylvania, the specific base he's on got like lumped in with the DC pay. So it's like
this gem that everybody wants. Low cost of living with an amazing salary. Exactly. So now they're
wanting us to move to Columbus, Ohio, where the pay is less and the cost of living is higher.
So he's currently at $88,000 a year. They're saying his supervisor is leaving.
And so in an effort to fill some voids, because not everybody is moving, they are telling him that that would be perfect for him to move into that position.
And so then if we were to move here and he were to start his supervisor's position, he would be making $91,000 a year.
So it's not that big of a bump just because of the pay here is obviously not as good.
So they're going to pay like relocation expenses, closing costs, and then they are also offering an incentive bonus of 25% of the salary,
which is great.
We have a month to decide.
They're supposed to give us the official letter any day,
like anytime between today and June 30th.
Hey Brittany.
I, yes.
Do you want to live in Ohio?
I don't know.
That's the question here.
Do you want to live in Ohio?
It's hard.
Do you have kids?
We do.
We have two teenagers, and I homeschool them.
Okay.
And we're all open to it.
Brittany, do you want to live in Ohio?
I don't know.
It's the unknown that's scary.
I think you do know.
You just don't want to say it out loud.
It sounds like you're trying to find a way on paper or Twitter that you're going,
this doesn't make sense.
We shouldn't do it.
When it's really just, I don't want to do it.
And both are okay.
Have you talked to him about this and shared your honest feelings?
Like, listen, yes, it doesn't make sense, but also I don't really want to go to Ohio.
Well, here's the thing.
We're on the same page.
He's like, he's the one that said, call.
I'm like, we're in Ohio right now.
He's here working for the week.
And so we were on the way yesterday and he said, just call and let's just see what they're thinking.
Because he has worked so hard to get to where he is. And I feel like, you know, every few years, it seems like it's
another little step back. And so we got this job two years ago and it's just tough. Like our house,
we only owe about a hundred thousand on it and we have such a low interest rate. And if we move
here, we're going to be starting over on that. Brittany. And I make about seven grand on like side stuff.
Brittany, do you want to live in Ohio?
Because if you don't, you owe it to yourself,
and you owe it to him to say that out loud.
So that from a foundation of honesty and a foundation of cool,
let's figure out what's next.
Y'all can make an informed decision together
because y'all said till death do us part, right?
Right.
And for better and for worse.
And he's had an amazing run.
And here's the deal.
He's going to have an amazing run.
And y'all are an amazing team.
What happens if he says no and he stays put?
So if he says no, they will find him a position in the area.
It might not be at that same base, so it could be at, you know,
another one where the pay is, again, not going to be as good.
And they have, I think it's up to a year, so he might end up on unemployment.
I don't want him to leave the federal government.
This is his goal for years.
He applied it so many times over and over.
Let's play out the other scenario then.
What happens if you stay and your life becomes worse and you're resentful for those reasons?
Oh my gosh, he now makes $70,000 and this isn't fair.
Is that a possibility?
Or he's unemployed and now he's got to find a new job versus the known.
There's so many elements. I know. I know. That's where I'm trying to cut through it. You've got to find a new job. Versus the known. There's so many elements.
I know.
I know.
That's where I'm trying to cut through it.
You've got to let the money go.
Y'all had a good run for two years.
You got the golden goose for two years.
That's gone now.
The life y'all had is now going to be over.
And the cool thing is, is you get to pick which one is next.
Is it a new one where he's a leader in Ohio, where it's going
to be a little bit more expensive and it's going to take you a little bit longer to be fully debt
free with a house? Cool. Or are you going to stay there and you can make a little bit less money?
It's going to take you a little bit longer to pay off your house, but you have friends and
connections and family and whatever else is going on in Harrisburg. Cool. But you're skirting the
real issue. The real question here is, do y'all want to do life in Ohio together?
Do you want to do life in Harrisburg? Or I had a, he had a dream of being a part of the federal
government after living in that dream for 10 years and getting moved and shifted and pushed
around every two years. It's just not good for the family, so we're going to get a new dream.
But you keep wanting to make this about $2,000 here and $7,000 over here.
It's just not – that's on the fringes.
You're not dealing with a core question.
Right.
Is that fair?
Yeah.
I mean, we've known about this for a year that this was coming and so we've talked about
every aspect in every scenario and we feel like there's possibilities here and there's support
at home and so we're just torn 50 50 where'd you grow up my kids are open I've lived in the
same zip code my whole life in Pennsylvania Okay. So does that scare you to leave?
A little bit,
yeah. Just a little bit? That would
terrify me. Are you excited at all about
the prospect of like, oh, this is a new adventure
for us? Or is it all just sort of like, ugh?
I'm just, I'm torn
right down the middle. Here's where I go.
You can make both of these scenarios be wonderful.
Yep.
You could have a great attitude and go, you know what?
This is going to be a new adventure.
It's going to be fun.
We're going to be making more money.
Sure, we'll have to find a new house, cost a living.
They're going to cover a lot of that, and it's going to be great.
We'll get the house paid off.
Here's our new goal.
And you live a great life in Ohio.
We're going to get into a homeschool consortium,
and I'm going to make a bunch of new friends,
and it's going to be awkward and weird,
but I'm going to go do this because it's going to be a blast.
I'm going to make some new friends.
Or you stay and you deal with whatever consequences come with that.
Whether it be unemployment, a dip in pay, and we slow down our goals here.
I think either way, you just have to be okay with whatever's next based on the decision you make.
And what you choose to do with that decision.
And can we just also, this is kind of a cool thing.
What are the chances that within the next two to three years,
something else gets moved or shifted or changed?
Just based on track record.
Well, this is, so this would be the first time they moved there.
This is supposed to be the permanent location for this now
because technically Harrisburg isn't even in the district that they're in.
So it didn't make sense.
So they're moving.
This is supposed to be it.
It's not like it happens often.
Okay.
There's an election coming up in November.
I just, as far as stability and
federal government stuff,
you're inside of it, so
you have a better insight than I do.
I think y'all
can make a decision to move to Ohio and
put two years on the calendar,
24 months. And if it's miserable,
y'all can move.
Or, chances are, y'all are going to get
moved anyway. There's gonna be some
new something or other i imagine his ceiling is higher moving into a supervisor role too right
yeah so we got to also think about what that does for our financial future
right i know but listen to me on this side britney as two guys who have worked really hard
and have quote-unquote earned positions, which that's a whole other language conversation we could have later.
I want my wife to be whole and happy. My life isn't just about what I've earned professionally.
It's about the life my wife and I are creating and the life George and Whitney are creating.
And so he can quote unquote earn any job he wants, but if his wife longs to be somewhere else, no job is worth that.
So I think you have to sit down and be honest and say, I want to go and I'm going to go all
in on this. I'm going to go a hundred percent or I don't want to go. I really want to stay here.
Make peace with whatever decision you do make.
And then go make a good time out of it. This is The Ramsey Show.
What does the future hold for business? Ask nine experts and
you'll get 10 different answers. Economic growth or a recession. Business taxes will go up or down.
AI will help us work or it will replace us all. But there's no such thing as a crystal ball. That's
why more than 40,000 businesses have future-proofed themselves
with NetSuite by Oracle, the number one cloud enterprise resource planning system.
Ramsey Solutions uses NetSuite, and you should too. Whether your company's earning millions or
even hundreds of millions, NetSuite helps you respond to immediate challenges and seize your biggest opportunities. With one
unified business management suite, there's only one source of truth for the visibility and control
you need to make quick decisions. NetSuite's real-time insights and forecasting help you see
into the future with actionable data. And when you're closing the books in days, not weeks,
you can spend less time looking backward and more time focusing on what's next.
And speaking of what's next, download the CFO's Guide to AI and Machine Learning
at netsuite.com slash Ramsey.
It's free at netsuite.com slash Ramsey. It's free at netsuite.com slash Ramsey.
Welcome back to the Ramsey Show, 888-825-5225. Let's go out to Dallas, Texas and talk to Alex.
Hey, Alex, what's going on? Hey, guys, how's it going?
Outstanding, brother. What's up? So my wife and I are going to wrap up Baby Step 3 in about a month,
month and a half. And so as we look forward, we are sort of split between saving up for a house or maybe saving up to start a business. Exciting. What are you guys doing now for work?
So right now I work in HR for an electricity provider and she works in HR compliance for an auditor.
Beautiful. Love in HR. We love to see it. Okay. What's your household income?
About $145 pre-tax. Amazing. And what is the business you want to start?
We want to start a coffee cart business, essentially serving coffee to weddings most likely on the weekends
we wouldn't like to let go of our week weekday jobs okay and what is it gonna
cost to start this business we're estimating probably like 20 25 for the
actual card itself before the entire thing card espresso machine and you know
the essentially initial investment.
Okay. And how long have you guys been married?
We're about to hit two years in August.
Fun. And you're renting right now. What is the urgency to buy a house in Dallas, Texas? Is that feasible?
That's the thing. Like, when we look at what we can afford with our budget,
we either have to buy something that is a little bit on the older side when it comes to a home, or we would have to go way off into either east or west, too far from our jobs. And yeah, it would make our commutes a little too long in our opinion. Okay. Well, I don't think these are mutually exclusive. I think you can start to
attack both. And so one thing I would do is set a down payment goal and then make sure you guys
are sticking to that. And on the other side, any leftover money, because we're not going to put
100% of our margin toward that, is let's start saving up for this coffee cart to pay cash for it.
Yeah. How much margin will you guys have to throw every month toward these goals
once you're out of Baby Step three and you're investing 15%?
After investing 50%, we'd be looking at maybe 2000, maybe 2500.
Okay. So let's say 25K a year.
So one route you could go is, all right, for the first year,
we're not going to save up for a house.
We're going to continue renting.
And in one year, we're going to have the money to start this coffee cart business.
It sounds like you're real excited about the coffee cart business and the house thing is like,
well, we can push that down the road a little bit. Is that fair?
Yeah. Yeah. It just, whenever we look at houses, it just, you know, whenever we think about the
investment, it doesn't seem as exciting at the moment, just with interest rates. And again, just our purchasing power right now is not, it doesn't excite us, at least from the
houses that we've looked at. That makes sense. And George, I had a buddy one time, and Alex,
I'm going to ask George a question on your behalf. It's more of a global question. I had a buddy one
time, this is years ago, I was going back and forth whether I was going to buy a house or not buy a house.
It was a small house.
It's all I could afford and this and that.
And I kept running these investment numbers.
And it was like, well, if I rent here and then 36 months here, the math just never came out.
And one day, a buddy of mine who works in finance said real emphatically,
dude, buy your wife a home.
And I looked at him, and I was like, yeah, but look at the,
and he interrupted me, and he is the most ROI guy I know.
He said, get your family a home.
And yes, this will become an investment over time,
but that property that is your home is your home, right? It's where you anchor in. And that sentiment was something I had never considered, and it that in my opinion after you know buying and selling houses and being married for over 20
years that transcends the spreadsheet the spreadsheet i like that transcends the spreadsheet
it's it's it's a place where the delonies anchor into and we've had multiple of those
but this is where we come in and drop our shoulders this isn't the don't touch the counters
don't touch the walls because this is an investment property. We're going to flip this and it rolls. This is a
place where we do life, right? We make memories. It's where our home exists. And so is that a bad
way to look at that? No, not at all. Okay. I just, you know, everyone's had different values and it
sounds like Alex and his wife, they've been married two years. The home isn't the thing that
they're like racing toward right now. Right. They have these, you know, while you're young, before you have kids, let's start this coffee cart business.
Remember when we did that? So it feels like that's where you guys are leaning. And you can also,
you know, change your aim and go, all right, we're going to get a condo in the next two years.
And that's going to mean this much down payment. And we're going to use the coffee cart money
to also throw at the down payment, which will speed up the process. So you can think about it
as a, as not separate things,
but one thing that will help the other.
Alex, have y'all done the math?
I'm sure y'all have done it on the back of a napkin,
but have y'all done grown-up business math on this coffee cart business?
What do you think you're going to make?
We would expect to probably bring at least first year. I mean, we'd be looking around maybe a thousand
per event. If we're working one Saturday, I mean, that would be around 12,000. And again,
we're not in a hurry to start this and go all off and quit our day jobs, but we're passionate
about coffee and would like to start that. maybe you know what we're thinking is that it could potentially give us more money to cut towards
a down payment for a home but uh yeah we we've looked at the numbers definitely a napkin math
but we should we could probably dive in a little bit more well in the in the i had a buddy who was
really passionate about barbecue really i mean was the best cook there was.
And that passion became starting a restaurant.
And being really passionate about barbecue was different than being a passionate restauranteur.
Right.
And being really passionate about coffee.
We love coffee.
We like sourcing it.
We like making our own.
We like sharing it with our friends.
That's one thing.
Running a business that's
going to be all Friday nights and Saturday nights and Sundays for indefinitely, that's a different
type of passion, right? And so I think it's just navigating which passion is the real passion.
And as George said, in what order, right? When we look up in three years, do we want to have a
thriving coffee cart business? And if that was to to be true how much money would make that thriving or do we want to have a home and
what would that look like and where would it have to be in the dfw market which is chaos like every
other market in america right now those are some great questions if you had to flip a coin alex
and you could have the coffee cart business of your dreams or a home, what would you pick right now?
Oh, man.
I think the first thing that came to mind was a home.
And, Don, that's something that, you know, I think we've been so focused on, like, what will be a return on investment, right?
What will be better for our money?
But emotionally, maybe we haven't had,
we haven't been having those conversations.
Hmm.
I think we have a new conversation.
Sit down with your wife and go,
okay, what really is the priority right now?
And can the coffee cart business wait?
And can we do the coffee cart business sooner and cheaper?
And instead we just rent the espresso machine
and we get a nice folding table
with some cool decor around it.
And we don't have to go buy a, you go buy a mobile trailer for a coffee cart right now.
And we'll do the $500 weddings instead of the $1,000 weddings.
And start small.
Maybe you do the first one for free for some friends and you take some cool pictures and put that on a little website.
And you just start small and start sooner while saving up for the down payment.
I feel like that would give me more peace from moving toward both. And George, I've got entrepreneur friends who would rather set themselves on fire than buy a
house. Like they are too busy trying to start a thing and then start a business.
I don't have to worry about a house and the maintenance and the repairs.
I'll sleep under a tree. I want to start a business. And so I love that Alex is going
to shift the question from what's the best investment? What's the best ROI? It's what's the life that we want to create two years into our new marriage? Do we want to be
a entrepreneurial couple that's going to build businesses together and we're going to start with
a coffee and then one day we're going to have a wedding planning business or do we want to look
up in three years and be well on our way to paying off a kind of old house, but it's ours and we'll
fix it up over time or we'll upgrade when the time's right. That's a different set of questions than what
are we passionate about and what's the best ROI right now? And I love getting to that,
what's the real question behind? What's behind the spreadsheet?
There you go. Yeah. That's a good question. Cha-ching. That's a good conversation.
Every once in a while, people need to actually use a spreadsheet.
I think everyone has those dreams. Like I want to do the house, but I also want XYZ.
Or I'm really passionate about music.
You don't have to quit everything, right?
Or what does that mean?
What's the question behind passion?
I love coffee.
I'm not trying to make money off of it.
I'm not smart enough.
You do consume enough to where your heart one day will explode.
I got some cold brew right down there.
And we'll see it from space.
That's it for this hour, America.
We'll be back soon right here on The Ramsey Show.
Live from Nashville, Tennessee, this is The Ramsey Show. I'm John Deloney, joined by my good friend
George Campbell, and we are taking your calls on money, building wealth, selling your house,
on your emotional health and your mental health, work you love, whatever you got going on in your life, we are here for you.
888-825-5225.
This show is made up of real people going through real challenges in real time.
And George and I are going to sit with you and figure out what's the next right move.
888-825-5225.
Let's go out to Dallas, Texas and talk to Kelly.
Hey, Kelly, what's up?
Hey, what's up?
What up?
What are we doing?
I just had a couple questions about how to get out of credit card debt and kind of stay afloat with mine and my husband's fluctuating income.
All right, bring it on.
What's going on?
So we have $2,300 worth of credit card debt um which is a big hurdle that we have right now
however it's super hard to pay it off considering that our incomes fluctuate so much he could bring
home anywhere from 1600 to 4000 a month and i can bring home anywhere $1,600 a month. What do you all do?
He works for a warehouse here in town,
but the pay is competitive and it's based off of work and the attendance bonus can either double
or cut your check in half depending on
if you were there the entire time
or if you had to miss a day for any reason.
And I work for UPS.
Okay. So if he shows up to work, he'll make $4,000?
Yes. So among other things, like it's based off of hourly, so it starts at $15 an hour,
and the attendance bonus is an extra $5 an hour.
So why wouldn't, I don't understand why it's not like school.
I mean, just stay there.
Why would you lose that?
Yeah, well, I mean, for instance, he missed a day a month ago because I had to call 911 for our son.
Well, that's different.
So we had to leave work to come pump out.
Yeah, that's not the everyday occurrence, but that's a once in a year or two or five
that would happen.
Yes, but it still affects the attendance bonus.
Okay. So if you miss one day,
you lose the whole month worth of attendance bonus? It's paid every two weeks, but yes,
it can cut your check in half or it can double it depending on your attendance. Okay, are you working full-time? I work part-time at UPS and we have it set that way. I work in the mornings and
he works in the afternoon to late at night so that we can avoid having to pay for childcare.
Okay. How many kids do you have?
We have two.
All right. And outside of the $2,300 in credit card debt, what other debt do you have?
He had to get a truck and I say had to because his car before was just breaking on us constantly.
We ended up spending like $2,000
to fix it in January and that would have paid for three months worth of a truck payment. It
wasn't reliable. It wasn't really... What's left on the truck loan? It's $23,000. So he chose to
get a $23,000 truck loan. Okay. What else? And then I have $2,000 worth of student loan debt. Okay. And that's everything?
Yes, that's everything.
All right.
So all in all, we're about, we'll call it $27,000 in debt.
Yes.
What's your household income for the year?
If you added it all up.
I think when we filed our taxes, it was $67,000 last year.
Okay.
All right. So we're trying to get out was $67,000 last year. Okay. All right.
So we're trying to get out of $27,000 worth of debt.
We make $67,000.
How much margin could you guys have if you got on an every-dollar budget
and you said, hey, anything that's not food, shelter, utilities,
transportation, insurance, we're not going to spend money on it?
How much money could you have to throw at the debt?
I mean, on a good month where he makes $4,000, probably $1,000 a month.
Okay.
So $1,000 a month times 27 months means you're debt-free in a little over two years, if you can throw $1,000, right?
Yeah.
Now, what if we could find a way where we could spend less and make more
and where we could put $2,000 a month? Then we could pay it off in about a year, right? Yeah. Now, what if we could find a way where we could spend less and make more in where we could
put $2,000 a month? Then we could pay it off in about a year, right? Yeah. Now we're talking.
That sounds a whole lot better to me if we're going to sacrifice. Right. So that's where the
budget comes into play. We look at the budget and we say, here's how much we're going to bring in
this month. Here's what our expenses are. Every other penny is going to go toward our smallest balanced debt. Have you tried that yet? We have. I did Financial Peace University when I was 14.
Oh my goodness. And every two years since. And so we're still on baby step number one. Like,
we're just trying to get a savings account. And every time we get something put back,
we get a flat tire or, you know, the catalytic converter goes out in the car or our room floods
from the bathroom like it's just one thing after another and we cannot get past baby step number
one i know but kelly you went out and bought a twenty something thousand dollar truck
so you have enough to cover a car payment no y'all did yes y'all did
and unless unless he has just gone rogue and that's a whole other issue you've got to address.
Did he do this behind your back?
No.
I advise not to.
I advise if he was going to get a car, it needed to be something more affordable.
George, I don't want to put you on blast, but your Tesla didn't cost.
No.
George is a millionaire, and he doesn't drive a car that expensive.
Again, my truck isn't near that expensive.
I want you to hear us say, like.
Anytime a guy says I had to buy a truck, he is lying.
Unless he is like a lineman.
Anytime he convinces his wife that he had to buy a truck, he's an amazing salesman.
But here's the thing.
At some point, we have to decide that life's not going to just happen to us anymore and it does
take a while to get out of the cycle kelly because i'm telling you like i remember when i was broke
it was like murphy wants to just live with me and go like hey buddy i know you're trying to get out
of debt but here's a little emergency have fun with this and at some point we have to go no longer
are we going to let life control us we're going to have agency and autonomy over what happens next. And that might
mean we sell the truck. And here's a deeper issue. I am not going to work at a place that if I have
to go take my son to a hospital, that I lose half of my income for the month. I refuse. I'm not going
to be held hostage like that. We, we live in a really small town.
It's one of the best jobs that are here,
but he is still applying for other jobs.
Okay, good.
Because I don't want to be held hostage that way.
I'd rather work at Walmart throwing boxes
for $20 an hour.
That's stable.
And it's stable.
It will always be there.
And you might not want to say I work at Walmart,
but I tell you what,
the job's going to keep being there and they're going to keep paying you 20 bucks and they're going to pay you overtime
if you keep working hard and you can always count on that but your original call is how do we even
get out of debt when our our income fluctuates by 50 percent in certain in certain weeks or
certain months yeah and you need stability as much as you need more money. Do you have, you live in a small town. Do you have anybody that can watch your kids for a few hours a day?
Um, my friend from Missouri just moved in and, um, she's helped out a little bit. So we also
do like Walmart delivery. We do door dash. I bake on the side for extra income, but here lately it's only making up from what he's lost in attendance bonuses.
Okay.
Well, the deal with the regular income is in that budget, if you have a regular income, for anyone listening, you're going to start with the four walls.
Food, utility, shelter, transportation.
That gets paid first.
If you make more than that, then we're going to cover the rest of the bills that need to get paid.
But luxuries are out until this debt is gone,
and I think he needs to strongly consider selling this truck and driving a beater truck for now
because we've got to swallow our pride while we're getting our family to stability.
That's going to hurt. He's not going to like it.
And I hope he doesn't come fight me because I'm sure he could take me in a fight.
So if he asks, John said it.
I'll say it. Sell the truck, man.
Your family's stability is way more important than looking fancy driving down the road.
This is The Ramsey Show.
I've been doing this show for over 30 years, and some of the saddest calls I've taken are from situations that are completely preventable.
Yeah, and what's so hard is I feel like one of those, especially the ones that I'm like, oh, it's terrible. People that call in and their spouse has passed away suddenly and they
don't have life insurance. When you have to think through how am I going to pay my bills in the
middle of next week, in the middle of all that grief, like it's just it is it's terrible. So
life insurance is the one thing, especially as a mom with three little kids that I'm like
so big on for people to get because it's inexpensive. Zander is the place that Winston and I actually get all of our life insurance.
And it doesn't cost much because Zander shops among a gazillion different companies.
It doesn't cost much. You just have to admit that someday you're not going to be here.
You got to say it out loud and you got to say, I'm going to say I love you to my family by
taking care of them and taking the time to put this stuff in place. The cost of stinking pizza. To get a free quote, call 800-356-4282.
That's 800-356-4282 or go to zander.com. Welcome back to the Ramsey Show. One of the greatest ways
you can support your neighbors, making sure they get financial information that can change their
life. Costs no money.
You don't even have to talk to your neighbors.
You don't even have to be that weird.
All you have to do is like the show, subscribe to the show,
leave a five-star review,
and it kicks the show up in the algorithms of the YouTubes and the podcasts
and wherever else you consume the show.
And it puts it in front of more people.
More people get the life-changing wisdom of
don't spend more than you make or the life-changing wisdom of i don't buy a house or a car that you
can't afford and uh don't wait on the government to bail you out just wild um new fangled wisdom
controversial controversial highly controversial all that inflammatory All that and more.
How dare you?
888-825-5225.
Let's roll out to Minneapolis and talk to the great and powerful Lance.
Hey, Lance.
Hey, man.
How's it going?
Great.
What's up?
Not a whole lot.
Just a couple questions.
Been listening to you guys for a few months.
I like and agree with everything,
but I'm in a weird situation because I can't get past baby step six because I
don't own a home. We've been renting.
My wife and I've been married for seven and a half years and we've been
renting for seven and a half years. Um,
we were kind of waiting for house prices to go down and they
never did. So I ended up starting a business with my sister. She lives in Iowa and we buy,
I bought like three condos with her that are rentals and also bought a place with her down
in Yuma, Arizona. They winter there. And so I have four paid for income producing properties.
I have a couple hundred thousand dollars in the bank.
My wife and I both make a good income. She makes around a hundred grand.
I make around a hundred grand.
I'm self-employed.
She has a 401k that she pays 6% and the company matches 6%.
So we're sitting in a good spot.
Here's my dilemma.
I want to continue to grow my rental properties.
I want to buy like a duplex, move into half of it, pay it off in a couple years or less,
and then buy our dream home.
Every house I show her, she doesn't want to live with anybody.
She doesn't want to rent out any part of it.
And the median house price in Minneapolis, St. Paul, where we live on the outskirts, is probably close to $400,000.
Right now we rent and we get a great deal.
We probably live in a $400,000 or $500,000 house and we pay $2150 a month, which isn't terrible.
It's not breaking the bank.
We're able to save every month. And obviously I'm able to grow my rentals.
But I know that I'm sitting here wasting time paying that $2,100 every month.
Lance, can I say something controversial?
Yeah, I was about to say it too.
You want to grow your rentals more than you want to grow your marriage.
Get your wife a home.
When is she going to – you've been married eight years.
Get your wife a home. I told her ten. I You've been married eight years. Get your wife a home.
I told her ten.
I said, at ten years, you buy whatever house you want.
But you guys have the money.
Get her a home.
Today.
Today.
I think she wins.
Okay, what kind of house does she want?
Let's talk about the house she wants.
Hold on, hold on.
This is more fun.
She wants an expensive house, man.
I know she does.
But you are caring for four other families more than your own.
What are your properties worth altogether?
So they're condos in Iowa.
They're worth around $90,000 a piece.
Okay.
And the one in Arizona, we just bought it for $130,000,
but that one's probably, I think we're coming into it with a little bit of equity,
maybe $10,000, $15,000.
So you have over half a million dollars in investment properties?
Well, I got half of a half a million dollars.
So my sister and her husband own the other half.
So I have a few hundred thousand, probably $230,000 to $250,000.
And how much do you have in cash?
$200,000 plus.
And you would be uncomfortable putting down $200,000 on a $500,000 home?
Yeah, because the $300,000 at that interest rate is still looking at like a $2,800, $3,000 payment.
What's your take-home pay after taxes but before other deductions, like investing in healthcare?
What would your take-home pay be?
Y'all make $200,000 a year.
Yeah, it's probably like $9,000, $10,000 a month.
Okay, let's say it's $10,000 a month.
We'll take 25% of that that's going to go toward the mortgage.
So $2,500, let's say, is the max, right?
Well, toward the mortgage?
Yes.
I don't know what the math works out to at $300,000.
Probably $2,500, $2,800. Yeah.
Well, all I'm saying is you go find, now we know, okay, our goal is $2,500 payment on a 15-year
fixed rate mortgage. That's what we're going to do. Well, now we have the home price and down
payment numbers to go, all right, if we put $200,000 down, we can afford a $420,000 home.
And so it's less about Lance's emotions versus her emotions. And it's based on a parameter we'd
agreed on
and then we're going to do it when the math makes sense and by the way retirement and taxes take up
eighty thousand dollars well uh well you're bringing home more than ten grand a month I'm a
I well she does pay a lot towards her HSA she She kind of taps that out. So we have that.
And then I, I'm self-employed.
So some months I bring home a lot and other months I bring home not as much.
What about the rental income?
I mean, is that not counting?
Yeah, the rental.
No, that's not counting the rental income.
I didn't even put that in.
Well, where's that going?
The rental, the rental income right now is probably around $1,500 a month.
My portion that I bring home.
Have you done the math?
Where is that money going?
Hold on.
Have you done the math on how much this divorce is going to cost you?
It's going to cost you half of everything you own.
I'm just saying, if we were patient for two years, we would have another duplex, babe.
Well, then it's going to be, but babe, Babe, I just got an amazing deal on this investment property
so I'm going to put the money towards that, but next year,
babe, it's going to be your year.
I already tried that.
That doesn't work. No, get your wife
a home.
Tell your wife, hey, listen,
take her out to dinner tonight with
some flowers and tell her
I want you to have a spreadsheet and I want
you to put it on the table and if you're really romantic, I want you to hang it spreadsheet and I want you to put it on the table.
And if you're really romantic, I want you to hang it over like the little candle and
let it just burn up.
Burn it.
And let the spreadsheet burn up and say, I love you.
And I have turned our marriage into a ROI and it should be an I love you.
Ooh, that sounds kind of good.
Me?
An I love you.
Meanwhile, I'm driving a 2003 regular cab Chevy pickup with $181,000.
Hold on, hold on.
You hear this, America?
Listen.
It's the world's smallest violin.
Nobody cares.
What does she drive, Lance?
Buy yourself a car.
You make $200,000 a year.
What does she drive?
She said I could buy a car.
I just can't buy a duplex.
Oh, geez.
Well, you know why?
Because somebody else lives in there with you.
Oh, my gosh.
You watch way too much Instagram.
Dude, get your wife a home.
I was going to let her listen to this episode, but now I can't.
We'll make sure she listens.
Hey, it's already in the record.
So when y'all go to court, it's going to get played anyway.
Lance, you know what you can't put an ROI on?
The joy on her face when you tell her, honey, we're going to buy a house.
We're going to buy a house.
Not for someone else.
Let's go shopping.
For us.
Let's go house shopping.
Let's go house shopping.
No, even better, let her go house shopping.
You have been house shopping.
Wow, that's great.
Because you're going to make it miserable.
You're going to go, no way.
I can find a much cheaper house. Let's going to make it miserable. You're going to go, no way, I can find a much cheaper house.
Let's go to Tile Depot.
Let's go to the Tile Depot
outlet warehouse and see if we can get that same tile.
Dude, just get your wife a house.
Get a house. Dude, you have done
an amazing job. You're crushing it.
How old are you?
45.
Amazing.
She's never owned a home?
So I don't want to do three.
See, you're laughing.
You know how expensive divorce is.
All right, get her a house.
Get her a house.
Has she ever owned a house?
Nope.
And she's 38 years old.
Only the rentals.
Yeah, she's never owned one.
And you guys make $200,000, and you have $200,000 in the bank.
Are you seeing what I'm seeing?
My tax guy tells me to buy a house
every year. Wow. You know why?
Because he knows how expensive divorce
is, too. He's seen some things, Lance.
Oh, man, we're having fun
with you, Lance. I want to see you win.
I want to see your marriage win. And part of that,
which is hard for guys like us, Lance, because we love
doing the math and the ROI, but you know
who doesn't care about that?
Is the person who loves you the most in this whole wide world.
They want a great life with Lance.
And at some point, they just don't care about another investment property that'll bring in another $300 a month.
They just want a place to call their own.
And at the end of the day, often people want to know, do you love me more than golf?
Do you love me more than your business?
Do you love me more than golf do you love me more than your business do you love me more than the spreadsheet do you love me more than the good deal on the duplex that we can move in and someone
else can live next door to us and listen to house music all night long whatever the thing is buy our
house and you better let her listen to this episode my friend this is the ramsey show
welcome back to the Ramsey Show.
Listen, the best way to make the most of your money
is by creating and sticking to a monthly budget.
I still don't like doing budgets,
and it's still the only way to keep me on the rails.
George loves budgets.
I live to just track the next transaction.
I feel like your heart rate just goes up 10 beats a day.
Sometimes I just look at it.
I just admire it.
Like I heard you the other day, and you were just like, oh, man.
And I looked over, and you had your budget out, and you were just all excited.
Anyway, the best way to make the most of your money is by creating and sticking to a monthly budget,
whether you like it or not.
Every dollar makes it simple to plan spending track expenses and save for what matters most
all of this is in an easy to use app that fits into your busy lifestyle every dollar has saved my
feeble attempts at making really complicated 75 tab spreadsheets it kind of calls out all my
bullcrap and all my excuses and just puts it right there in front of my face. One keystroke and your formula got blown up and it's like, hashtag ref.
And I'm like, I don't know what's happening.
Get me out of the spreadsheet.
Well, no, that works, but it just allows me to be like, well, you know, like in five years, if we do this, we triple stamp, double stamp.
Just how much did you spend this month versus what you said you were going to?
Can I tell you anyone, any spouse that uses the spreadsheet, your spouse doesn't want to look at it.
You're the only one in the family versus every dollar.
It's loaded up on your phone.
You can both just tap in.
You have the accountability.
No one has to look at a spreadsheet again.
And there is some comfort slash accountability, depending on which side of this you fall on,
that if you and you and your spouse tie yourselves to the same every dollar account or connect
with the every dollar account, when you spend, she knows. When knows when she spends you know and you don't have to blame each other
you can just call your budget derrick and say oh classic derrick am i right that's not really how
he said we can't goes in my house but no no just sheila says john stop yes exactly so download
every dollar for free it doesn't cost any money. In the App Store or the Google Play Store.
Is that right?
The Google Play Store?
Yeah.
That sounded right.
Have you ever been to the Google Play Store?
You made it sound wrong, but I think it's definitely right.
Go to the Google Play Store or the App Store today, right now,
and download every dollar for free.
Let's go out to Rochesterchester new york and talk
to mitch hey what's up mitch hey guys how we doing outstanding brother what's up so uh my wife and i
are uh drowning a little bit uh in debt tell us about it man yeah so we both have advanced degrees. We're looking at about $400,000 in student debt and then about $200,000 on a mortgage.
And essentially, the interest on my loan comes out to about $1,500 every month and kind of the thing that's slowing us down to make any progress. So it's
kind of putting us in a paycheck to paycheck situation. Are you guys using both degrees?
Yeah. Yeah. We're both practicing chiropractors. Awesome. What's the household income?
About $120. That feels low. Are both of you working full-time?
Early. Yeah. We're both early in our careers, so there's definitely room for growth.
But yeah, we're still in the first kind of five years.
Are you working for another practice right now?
Yeah, both of us are at separate practices as associates.
Can you work on, do private practice on Saturdays and Sundays, or is that a violation of your contract?
Yeah, that's a no-go.
So I hate to tell you this, but as a guy who's got advanced degrees,
who ran up a bunch of student debt,
you're going to have to do the job that you get to feel prestigious about,
and you're going to have to do a bunch of other work on the side.
Right.
Because that $1,500, dude, that's net neutral, right?
You're spinning your wheels, and you're going nowhere.
Right. How did this neutral, right? You're spinning your wheels and you're going nowhere. Right.
How did this happen, man? How did you all borrow $400,000 to be chiropractors?
Well, so tuition is about $150,000 or so.
So, you know, between that and living expenses, that's kind of where it adds up.
But how did you end up taking jobs for $60,000 a piece?
I could tuck your ear off all day long about the ins and outs of why Kairos don't get paid.
But New York tends to be one of the bad states for it.
Was it time for y'all to move?
Maybe. We just bought a house.
Yeah, I know, but you owe more than half a million dollars in debt.
Oh, yeah.
And you know that, but I just want to say it out loud, and you make 60 grand a year.
Right.
That's a scary reality, right?
Oh, yeah.
So this is going to look different.
Now, our friend Jade Warshaw, her and her husband, Sam Warshaw, they paid off $468,000 in seven years.
So your journey is going to look more like that than the average baby stepper who's like, I paid off my debt in two years.
So we need to figure out what it looks like to at least pay off your debt with an aggressive timeline.
Let's say if it's seven years, that's $57,000 a year, which means all of one of your gross incomes would need to be going toward the debt, which I don't think you guys can do right now, right? With your minimum
payments, your mortgage. So we need to figure out how to get the income up in order to pay off this
debt in an aggressive timeline. And the only way to do that is by spending less and making more.
So one option is you sell the house, you rent to alleviate at least that mortgage weighing you guys
down, and you go work every
single weekend, and one of you's working one night, the other one's switching off. Do you
guys have kids? Yeah, we got one little guy. Okay. And what's childcare look like?
300 a week. Okay. That's not too bad for daycare. Yeah. Okay. So that's just going to be part of
our budget. Are you guys doing an every dollar budget right now? We're kind of on the start of that right now. Okay. I'll help you
out. I'll give you every dollar premium. So it connects to your bank account, has some really
cool extra features like paycheck planning, financial roadmap. So hang on the line when
we're done and we'll gift that to you guys to help you on this journey. And it will be a journey.
But the only way is we got to get this income way up in order
to knock out, you know, 40, 50, 60 grand a year from these student loans instead of two grand a
month. You even realize that 50 to 60,000 a year is the bare minimum, right? Surprisingly, no,
it gets a lot worse than that. Tell me about it. So, I mean, I've got colleagues who are making $20,000, $30,000 a year around the same area.
How is that possible? I know what I pay my chiropractor. How is that possible?
I wish I knew, but it seems to be the reality, unless you're in a separate state taking a salary.
A large part of it is a lot of our salaries are based on volume.
So if you're seeing a lower number of patients earlier in your career, you're not making as much as, say, someone who's seeing double your volume.
But why would you sign up with a practice if they're not handing you clients?
That's what you trade, right?
You trade the full weight of the payment for a steady stream of clients.
Right.
Yeah, us specifically, we're a newer practice.
So everyone's growing.
I think there's definitely been some learning curves.
Is there another practice you could go join? Did you sign a contract where you have to stay a
certain amount of time or what? Yeah, I'm locked in here and I feel
pretty passionate about the people I'm with. Like I said, I do think there is room for growth.
And I know there's a handful of other practices in the area that I've looked at
might not have been a better fit for.
So part of it, I guess, comes down to my morals and how I'm willing to practice.
No, I don't think that's it, man.
I don't think you're – man, maybe I'm crazy, Mitch.
But – and again, I just spent my whole career sitting with medical professionals.
I don't think you're getting it.
You want to have like,
I've got these morals,
man.
You also have a moral responsibility to pay off your debt.
You have a moral responsibility to be a present father in your home and a
husband.
And you can't do that when you owe half a million dollars.
And there's this sense of,
well,
it's just the way this is in this town.
Well, then sometimes throughout human history, people have gotten on a boat
because the farm wasn't producing, and they went across the world.
Sometimes you have to get up and just go do a radical thing.
And if it's going to grow, then somebody's going to have to just do wild things
like work late at night, and we're the only practice open on Saturdays and Sundays,
and we work from 4 p.m. until midnight
because that's when people get off of work.
Y'all are going to have to get radical
about developing a different kind of practice
so y'all can make more money
than these other just meandering practices in the neighborhood.
And so if you're going to go do this, man,
you've got to go all in like your life depends on it
because it does.
You can't just go, oh, it only makes 60 grand.
It's just the market in this area. That kind of ad, like it just is, you know, like I could tell
you why they don't pay. No, go make it happen. Go make it happen. There's got to be a sense of
urgency and almost not panic, but almost panic. I'm going to go make this happen for me and my welcome back to the ramsey show um george john i had a little bit of a bad attitude on that last
call i could tell you got a little fired up but i know i also know as someone you've experienced
you know high levels of student loan debt getting advanced degrees and the heartbreaking part is the
roi it almost feels like i mean they're literally getting scammed to go $400,000 into student loan debt to make
60 or a hundred boggles my mind. Yeah, I, I, I get that. And here's the challenge. I think the,
um, I think when you graduate with a advanced degree, there's just this feeling that now the world is going to open up to me.
And I've experienced it a couple of times, right?
Like now I can kind of do whatever I want.
And then you realize like, oh no, math still applies.
And my quote unquote, following my passion,
if there's not a market for it, there's not a market for it, right?
And I want to do what I want to do in this particular geographical location.
Well, those jobs only pay this, so you can't.
And when you owe money, especially you owe that much money,
what you want to do and what you're passionate about goes out the window
because you owe that much money.
It's what you have to do now.
Where you want to be, I want to be by family,
I just want to stay at home, I want to homeschool. All that goes out the window because you first,
before you had these principles and values, you hit yourself to that wagon, which is in this case,
half a million dollars, right? And it's heartbreaking because I could tell somebody
like Mitch wants to help his community. If you're around good chiropractors, there's some scam ones
or scam every, every profession. You're a good chiropractors.'s some scam ones are scam every every profession you're a good chiropractors um their whole life is dedicated to giving people their life back helping them move
helping them not be in pain helping to get back to work all those things they're amazing to be
around they're inspiring but man when you're so constricted on what you can actually do in your
life just because of how much you owe it's so you can hear it in their voices it's just so terrifying right and i wish there was better coaching on the front end but
on the back end man it is what it is now we have to live in reality and make some really hard
choices but when you can you know you can get a full-time job at a being a manager of a local
fast food joint for the same amount you can make after a doctorate degree in some of these
professions you gotta weigh that right that's tough well i hope everyone who is about to get a degree you
have a kid you're a parent go watch borrowed future our award-winning documentary it's free
on youtube it's at about 88 minutes and the stories in there there's some heartbreaking
ones and there's some inspiring ones i remember that the dentist who had a million dollars into
debt and hearing him the tears and the shriek of pain in his voice is haunting.
Yeah.
And it makes me go, let's triple check and make sure this is going to be worth, the juice is worth the squeeze on this.
All right.
Today's question of the day comes from Beth in Indiana.
Here's what Beth has to say.
Our oldest daughter ran away after high school graduation to live an alternative lifestyle that we don't approve of.
She hasn't spoken to us in three years, though we've tried to contact her.
We have some savings in life insurance, about $5 million, and need to make a will, as we have nothing in place right now.
We have three other children that are responsible and trying to live God-honoring lives.
Would you include a child in your will that refuses to have a relationship with you?
We aren't quite sure how to handle this.
We love her dearly, of course, but also don't want to support her lifestyle.
Is there a fair way to deal with this?
I mean, there's a lot of, I don't really know what she's talking about here.
You don't agree with your child's decisions morally ethically financially whatever
they're doing the relationship is strained do you still leave them in the will
i mean i guess it depends on how you look at your will is your will a um Will a reward for a childing well done, right?
Is it an investment in the future of your legacy?
Like, what are you using your will for?
And I think that's question number one.
Question number two is, it doesn't sound like Beth has understood that she left, the child left them.
And the kid has said, for whatever reason,
I don't want to be a part of y'all's life anymore.
I don't want to talk to y'all anymore.
And I'm assuming that means I don't want your money either.
I don't want anything to do with y'all.
Y'all have said you don't approve of me.
You don't accept me.
So I'm out.
And so in that case um
as far as i'm concerned the will is is second best i always want my kid to know you can come
to my home and i love you yeah okay here i'm between a rock and a hard place here because
on one hand i'm like okay don't put them in the will that's your prerogative you're not a bad
person no and on the other hand i'm just like thinking of the prodigal son story of you know
the dad watching his son coming over the hill and he's so excited.
He's throwing the party, the feast.
My son is home.
We don't know that there's going to be a happy ending like that here.
We just don't know.
But I want to have that open-handed spirit that says this is not a one and done final thing.
Right.
And that you're still fighting for this relationship.
But you're also not going to chase them down, you know, and shove it down their throat.
So I hope the relationship's repaired and that there's a beautiful, happy
ending and she gets back in the will, but I don't think it really matters at this point
because the relationship does not exist. I can just tell you, George, I cannot count
dozens, maybe hundreds, but for sure dozens of conversations I've had with parents over the years
of college students and young adults who have come back in older years and said, I would do
anything to have those conversations back to, to have my judgments back. Cause I just want my kid.
And sometimes we go to war over, I told you not to borrow money, so you won't come home until you have that credit card
or whatever else thing you, right?
My three kids are great, but it's you because you, whatever.
I'm telling you, man, the number of families that have come back
and said I would do anything to have those conversations back
and let my kid know that I love them.
I don't agree with them.
I think you're a knucklehead as long as you're safe right if you're not being safe that's a whole other
conversation right um or if you're struggling with addiction that's a whole other conversation
and that's the part we don't know what is this alternative lifestyle is she blowing this money
on drugs i have no idea but here's the deal um when it comes to your will it's your money you
decide what you want to use it for and what this um your five million dollars is for um
i want to tell all parents out there don't use your inheritance to buy
um love from your kids or buy compliance yeah that's the part the part that irked me was that
we have three other children that are responsible they're trying to live god-honoring lives right
yeah i'm like well now it's a competition of of morals
and who makes mom the proudest which that part feels weird to me yeah it's tough it's personal
it's a very personal thing i can't decide for you i just know i'd want to be open-handed trying to
repair the relationship and who knows how much money you'll actually have when you you know hit
the dusty trail celebrities have said you know steve harvey's like me and your mom are gonna
spend every dime we got you ain't getting none of this you know that's have said, you know, Steve Harvey's like, me and your mom are going to spend every dime we got. You ain't getting none of this. You know, that's fine. You know, Guy Fieri said
the same thing. He's like, I'm going to spend all the money. I'm going to make sure that you're a
responsible adult who knows how to make their own wealth. But I'm going to spend what I've made or
give it away to charities I believe in, you know? So I don't think there's a right or wrong way to
do it. But I do think you've got to- but let's go to this question would you include a child in your will that refuses to have a relationship with you
um it happens but it's very rare that that is a one-sided choice usually somebody chooses to not
have a relationship with their parents because their parents have put stipulations on that
relationship that they are opting out of right so it's actually a kid putting up a boundary saying, if this is your requirement for you
to love me, I get the message I'm out.
Right.
And so, um, what I include a child in my will that refuses to have a relationship with me,
depending on whether that money would contribute to their premature death.
Um, I would, yes, because it's about me um loving my kid but that's me and my hope is i
never get to the situation and i know it happens all i mean it's been my whole career but this is
heartbreaking um what about you george i got a nine month old it's heartbreaking even think about
not having not having a relationship she just said dada Said her first words the other day. I'm like, I cannot imagine one day
where she's like, I want nothing to do with you.
I would be so heartbroken.
I think the will would be the last thing
on my mind at that point.
But truthfully-
It's heartbreaking.
But even my son's one of the most amazing young men I know.
He's 14.
And I asked him recently, I said,
hey, as we're going into high school,
when you reach age X,
I want to take just you and me
anywhere you want to go in the country. Like anywhere, we're going to go school when you reach age X I want to take just you and me anywhere you want to go in the
country like anywhere like we're going to
go on a father son trip
and he's like actually I just want to do stuff
with my friends and I was like
I know but like we can go anywhere we can do anything and he's like
yeah I just want to be with my friends
and it was a
knife to my soul and if I had said
well then you don't and now I'm
doing this right I'm putting up this wall.
Then if you don't let me love you
like I want to love you, then you... Oh, boy.
And it's... Right? You become the child at that point.
That's exactly right. Then I start putting
stipulations on that instead of me going,
man, that bums me out, but
cool, man. I know you love your friends.
And me having to reconcile that I'm raising a young man
who is going to separate from his dad
over time. It's tough.
Parenthood, man. What a journey.
They didn't come in the manual on this one.
This is The Ramsey Show. We'll be back shortly.
Live from Nashville, Tennessee, this is
The Ramsey Show. I'm John Deloney
joined by George Camel.
We are taking your calls about your money,
your wealth building, the work that you love,
your relationships, your mental and emotional health, just about everything.
888-825-5225.
A couple of opinionated guys.
We've got opinions for you.
That's me.
I think that's us, but that's cool.
And we're great at grammar. 888-825-5225. Let's go out to
St. Louis, Missouri and talk to J-O-E. What's up, Joe? Hi, how are you? I'm outstanding, brother.
How are you? I'm doing well, thank you. You bet. What's up my situation so my uh my situation um i my wife and i have been
aggressively paying off debt this year we had a plan to pay off all of our debt in 2024
and the the issue though that we're having kind of midway through the year
oh joe we lost you let's turn back on joe. Joe, we here, brother? Joe, you there?
Can you hear me?
There we go.
All right, now we're back.
Continue.
Continue.
Go ahead.
Hi, sorry.
So I've got a couple of life changes coming up.
My wife and I were paying off debt, and we just found out a few weeks ago that we're
expecting a baby.
Yay!
Thank you. Baby number five. Whoa! All right, I take that back. Just a baby. Yay! Thank you.
Baby number five.
Whoa!
All right, I take that back.
Just kidding.
No, that's good.
That's awesome.
So, and along with that,
I'm looking in about a year to have a career change.
And so my question, I guess,
is how aggressively should I continue pay off debt?
Because I really want to pay off the debt this year.
However, I understand like the stork mode concept, but I feel like we may have enough income that we could do both. So I'm just trying to figure out what priorities are. Yeah, you're
right about stork mode for those listening, wondering what the heck that is. When you're
having a baby and you're in baby step two, that's when it's okay to pause and just keep minimum
payments. Don't put anything extra and just stack up cash in a baby and you're in baby step two, that's when it's okay to pause and just keep minimum payments,
don't put anything extra, and just stack up cash in a savings account until mom and baby are home and healthy.
And so that's okay to do.
How much money do you guys have right now in the bank?
Barely any, and this is why I think we may have, I don't want to say maybe went too hard.
Earlier this month, I looked at my bank account, and we had about $1,300 total.
So how long have you guys been living paycheck to paycheck like this?
Basically this year, since we started paying off debt.
All of our savings...
But have you been in debt since you've been married?
Not the entire time.
So we had all debts paid off a few years ago but then both my cars
were totaled and my family car and my personal car that i take to work so we um then had to get
new cars and we got you walked to the dealership and said give me your most expensive cars
stat no no no no i was able to put a significant amount of money down i have one car paid off
already okay and the only debt we have left is twenty thousand dollars on a um on a minivan
all right so that's that's everything we got left so 28k on the minivan and when is baby
20 000 20 000 when's baby due baby's due end of January. Okay. So we have some time.
What's your household income? About just north of $11,000 a month. Oh my goodness. So why don't
we get this van paid off in like three or four months? Well, so, and this is like, this is the thing with saving up for a career change and the baby.
Why do you need to save up for the career change?
So I'm, my career, I'm an active duty military.
Okay.
And I, there's a possibility that with a career change, it could be involuntary career change
just with lack of promotion and separation and all that.
So what do you want?
You're speaking in code, Joe.
You're speaking in code.
Are you about to get laid off?
No.
Well, actually, maybe.
Are you about to get discharged?
I could, yes.
Honorably or dishonorably?
Honorably, honorably.
So it's just basically being passed up for promotion.
It's not dishonorable or anything, but there's a chance that it could happen.
If it does happen, it could happen as early as March of next year.
So I'm getting a little nervous about having enough money.
So what is the career change?
What are you wanting to do exactly? So I have getting a little nervous about having enough money. So what is the career change? What are you wanting to do exactly?
So I have an engineering degree, and I'm wanting to be an engineer.
Okay.
What does that have to do with you paying off the minivan in the next four months?
Well, basically how aggressively I should be saving.
Don't save.
Because then Justin Falk. Let's get priorities straight. well basically how aggressively i should be saving don't say because then just in thought
let's get priority straight number one let's get out of debt and then let's stack up some cash for
baby and my guess is by the time baby's here you will be debt free with a fully funded emergency
fund and if i'm you i'm doing six months because you got a whole lot of kiddos to take care of
and think about this you're trading paying this off
and going bananas right paying this off having five kids um or four kids pregnant wife you're
trading paying this 20 grand off for having no job the potential and this is this is anxious
thinking having the potential of no job and a $20,000 liability hanging around your neck.
Right.
And I would definitely prefer not to do that.
Right.
Just having that cushion and not being anxious about it.
When I get anxious, I create worst-case scenarios and then I backfill them.
How realistic is this?
That I lose my job?
Yes.
I'd say about 50-50, honestly.
Is there anybody you can go sit down and ask?
No, because I'm waiting for promotion results to come out,
and they keep that hush-hush.
Okay.
And so promotion, I've never heard of this so you're
you're teaching me live in your particular branch you either get promoted it's kind of like tenure
in academics you get tenure or you get fired right so if you so if you get looked at so you
get looked at twice and if i were to get passed up for promotion a second time i got passed
up for promotion once if i get passed up for promotion a second time i have to be discharged
how seven months after i get notified of that how many seven months later seven months after i get
notified okay which i should be notified end of august so you got plenty of time to make plans
for what's next right now it sounds like we sounds like we're ignoring the debt and all the things that are really happening in reality
today. So here's my plan for you, Joe. You ready for it? Can you live off of it? What are your
monthly expenses total up to? Fuel, utility, shelter, transportation, insurance, all that
for the family. So my monthly expenses, it varies when my kids are in school.
Give me the average.
Okay, so average, I'd say it comes out to be about $5,000 a month.
Okay, hear me out.
If you do $6,000, you said you make $11,000.
So $5,000 a month means there should be, if you do a budget, $6,000 a month.
Now you do the math.
In about three and a half months, the van's paid off.
Am I correct?
Correct.
And then three and a half months later, we could have another 20 grand saved up.
And then the baby's here.
And then the baby's here.
So think about that.
That could be a reality.
Come January, you're debt-free with an emergency fund looking for an engineering job.
Does that sound like a good plan?
Right.
And that means when y'all are buying back-to-school clothes,
y'all aren't going to go hog wild this year.
You're going to hang on with those four kids the best you can.
You're going to reuse some stuff, secondhand some stuff,
Facebook Marketplace some stuff.
Is that ideal?
No.
Is that what might be in season for you guys this year?
Yeah.
And seven months making that kind of money is 70 grand.
That's a good landing pad for you to go be an engineer somewhere you're gonna be all right my brother we'll be right back
welcome back to the ramsey show 888-825-5225 george this is happening
are you talking about what i think you're talking about? I'm talking about that. You, me, D-Money, Rachel, Jade.
A couple of thousand of our closest debt-free friends.
Ken Coleman and several thousand Ramseyites on a boat traveling the high seas, man.
It doesn't feel real, but it's very real.
It's called the Live Like No One Else Cruise, and it's back.
It's happening March 22nd through the 29th of 2025,
so you've got plenty of time to make your plans and join us.
Seven-day cruise.
Stops all through the Caribbean.
Turks and Caicos to St. Thomas to Puerto Rico, the Bahamas.
Dude.
This is wild.
Didn't they used to sing a song about this?
Come on, pretty mama, Key Largo. Oh, wild. Didn't they used to sing a song about this? Come on, pretty mama.
Key Largo.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
We're not going to Kokomo, are we?
I think if we sing any more, the FCC will take us down.
I think you're right.
But here's the deal.
The cruise set sail in March of 2025.
And if you want to go, here's the deal.
You just need to put down a $600 deposit to secure your cabin.
So lock it in because this thing is going to sell out real soon. And this is for those who have done the hard work.
They've lived like no one else. They've become debt-free. We want to celebrate with you. And
so we're going to do the largest debt-free scream ever done, I think, in the world. I can't imagine
a bigger group of people doing them. But yes, it's going to be the largest debt-free scream
of all time in human history ever.
If you want more info, you can go to
ramsaysolutions.com slash cruise.
You can see all of the special guests
we're going to have on there. Magicians,
musicians, world-class
chefs, singers,
songwriters, John might sing.
George will have a... Your somersault routine
is world-class.
I think we need a Ramsey Personalities karaoke night.
Done.
Done.
That could be worth it.
I think a Ramsey Personalities talent show would be incredible.
I could probably find a talent between now and then.
No, you can't.
But some people can.
That's fair.
It's going to be a...
No, actually, Jade would destroy us all.
That's...
Yeah, I'm not going to be singing on that.
I'm out on that.
Jade used to sing professionally on cruise ships.
I know.
So we're definitely out.
Nope, not doing that.
Oh, I'm legitimately pumped.
Turks and Caicos, St. Thomas, Puerto Rico, the rico the bahamas and more we hope to see you there march
22nd through 29th 2025 600 deposit that's it 600 bucks you can put it down reserve your cabin
they're going super fast ramsay solutions.com slash cruise c-r-u-I-S-E not slash Rachel Cruz.
That's actually a good point. Well done.
RamseySolutions.com slash cruise.
Alright, let's go back out to Dallas, Texas, one of our
favorite cities today and talk
to Amber. Hey Amber, what's up?
Hi.
Thank you
very much for taking my call.
Of course. What's going on?
Yeah, so I have been thinking about
my living situation. I live in an apartment and I don't have an income right and I also have a disability.
So I have been pretty much just surviving on a long-term disability settlement that I received like two years ago.
How much was that for?
The settlement was for, let's see, I think it was $80,000.
Okay.
What's the nature of the disability, Amber?
So I have multiple sclerosis.
Okay.
And yeah, so it was kind of crazy that I had just got that settlement.
And then like a few months later, I found out I was pregnant.
Is it just you?
Are you solo? Yes, I found out I was pregnant. Is it just you? Are you solo?
Yes, I am solo. That's the other thing.
Do you have any family in town?
No, no, not at all.
What is keeping you in Dallas at this point?
Well, I'm from Dallas, and Dad is in Dallas, too.
What is his involvement right now with this relationship?
He's there, but we're still working through it.
Is he paying child support?
Okay.
Have you gone and formalized this with an attorney?
Late. Yeah, that's something I'm looking into, but I haven't done anything yet.
I've just been kind of using it for a year to see how things are going to go.
You know how they're going to go, right?
Yeah, I think I have a pretty good idea now.
You do. You know. I know how you want them to go and i want them to
go that way too but they're not going to yeah i want you to call legal aid dallas um there's some
there's a bunch of resources there and if you can't get a hold of them there's a couple of
fantastic law school clinics there in the dfw area and i want you to reach out to one of those
clinics and see if they will walk you through the child support process so we can get him on record. So he's got to pay. Now we both know that that
system's flawed and it doesn't always work out like we want it to, but I want it on record so
that you have that additional support for that little baby. If he's going to choose to opt out
of that baby's life, fine, but he's going to put some money down, okay, and support that kid. Is that fair?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely. Yeah, he kind of contributes a little bit, but...
Kind of contributes a little bit is not good enough for me. I want, he is paying $600 per month.
Yeah.
Every month. Yeah, actually, it's crazy you say that because that's exactly what he's doing.
Okay.
But I have this feeling that... What's your living he's feeling okay um all right so what i have this feeling
there what's your um living situation how can we help you yeah so um so i'm in a apartment
it's a one bedroom and um it's about 1700 and720 a month, that's including the water, trash, all that stuff.
So about $1,720 a month.
And like I said, I've been living on this, you know, amount of money for like the last two years, pretty much exclusively.
But you're burning through the $80,000.
What is the balance now?
So now we're sitting at like $80,000. What is the balance now? So now we're sitting at like 40.
I know.
And so I'm like, this is dwindling really fast.
I am really sad because I don't know what to do.
Will you qualify for disability?
I don't know.
I did apply three years ago, the way before baby was here,
but I was denied at the hearing level, unfortunately.
But it sounds like are you going to be able to work for the foreseeable future,
or is that not going to be a possibility?
I'm going to try because, yeah, I'd rather try than, because I know it's going to be a long road if I apply again, which I might do.
I think you do both.
But Amber, can I just be super direct with you?
Sure.
You got the rug pulled out from under you in your life, didn't you, two years ago?
Oh, yeah, 100%.
Yeah. In this diagnostic diagnostic this diagnosis is scary
and it's painful and it's uncomfortable right yes and then you found yourself with this amazing baby
and there was terror and fear and also optimism that dad was going to come through and it's going
to work out and it hasn't right right and i'm saying this because we have a compressed time limit together and because i because i care about
you the whole time you've been knocked down and you got knocked down a couple of times
math has kept spinning right the real reality has kept spinning while you're grieving.
And so the quicker you can pull the pin on this apartment that you simply cannot afford,
you can't afford a $1,700 a month place plus utilities because you're just burning through that settlement money that you got.
And I would love more than anything for you to be able to just stay at home with that baby.
It's just not a financial reality for you.
And so if you have a local church that can help support you, or if you can figure out a way to work from home, do different types of whatever that is.
Now that you're wrestling with like, this is going to be the rest of my life with MS.
And here we go.
Whatever you can do.
I've worked with some amazing colleagues over the years who had MS, and it was tough for them.
It was a unique experience, but, man, they were contributors.
They were A-plus rock stars on the team, right?
And so it's figuring it out.
Okay, this has been my story.
This has been my lot, but I'm going to get back out there because it's me and it's this little baby, right?
You need a sustainable solution long-term, and for now, that might be applying for SSI
because right now you got to take care of that baby.
You got to pay the bills.
And we also need to get out of this lease
and find a cheaper apartment.
I would apply for SSI ASAP
and I would reach out
and see if you can get out of your apartment
and break the lease.
Say, I can't make the payments anymore.
I have no job.
I'm on disability and go from there.
Thanks for the call.
We'll be right back.
Welcome back to the Ramsey show.
I'm John Deloney joined by George camel,
and we've got an amazing,
beautiful family on the debt free stage. We've got Thomas,
Suzanne and Cameron from Raleigh,
North Carolina,
the research triangle.
How are we doing, y'all?
Wonderful.
How are you?
Good.
Good to have you guys.
Thank you.
So you're on the debt-free stage.
How much debt did you pay off?
$167,000.
Okay.
How long did that take?
37 months.
Wow.
Wow.
Kamen, did you used to have a brother that they got rid of?
What happened?
He's unamused by John.
I love it so much. Okay,
what was your range of income during that time? So we started about 113 and we finished at about
133. Way to go. What do you guys do for a living? So I'm a pastor. I'm a nurse. Wonderful, wonderful
careers helping your community. Love to see that. All right, what type of debt was the 167?
So a little bit of everything we had credit cards
personal loans uh we had about 58 000 student loans uh that was actually the last part that
we paid off and then we had uh 75 000 in vehicle payments 75 000 man preachers be rolling man i had
a f-150 lariat that was fully loaded and and that was probably the hardest part to let go of.
Said had.
And a motorcycle.
Yeah, and the motorcycle.
That's right.
I feel like you still go in the garage in a dark room and just stare at the wall and
be like, I miss you, Ford.
Yeah, every time I see one drive by, I'm just like, hmm.
So you like things that go over room.
And Suzanne, did you have no part in these car loans?
No, I had a 2016 Explorer XLT leather interior sunroof.
Of course.
And I kind of had my identity in my car.
Wow.
And that was hard to let go of too, and I miss it every day.
Do you have any of these now?
Did you get rid of all the vehicles?
Yeah.
We drive, he drives a 2011 Subaru Tribeca now.
200,000 miles. Oh, that's a pretty picture of it on YouTube. Well, that one actually 2011 Subaru Tribeca now. 200,000 miles.
Oh, that's a pretty picture of it on YouTube.
Oh, you're just getting gone with Subaru, man.
Well, that one actually the engine blew up on.
Okay.
And so he, we traded in the Explorer, got the Subaru Tribeca, and then he drives that
and I have a 16 Escape that they're both paid off now, obviously.
Wonderful.
But hold on, can you say it again?
But I miss it every day.
We do both miss our vehicles every day.
This is intense.
So three years, you paid off $167,000.
How did you do that?
And what got you on the path?
We sold everything.
Yeah.
Except our child.
Wow.
And she picked up all kinds of shifts.
So I went from a Monday through Friday 8 to 5 job to a 36-hour a week, 12-hour shift nursing job that I was able to pick up extra shifts.
Wow.
Okay, so 37 months ago, you guys are pretty normal as far as America goes.
You had all the car payments, student loans.
Actually, it started like 14 years ago.
My brother Richard got us two of the Financial Peace DVDs.
We watched them we started
budgeting but we didn't change any of our behavior so you just felt like oh that was fun that was
cool we were actually just recording what we the stupid stuff we were doing he thought it was like
a cool movie because he didn't get you all the dvds he just got you two you're like baby step
four and just left you hanging that's right wow okay so 37 months ago you were like hey remember that
dave ramsey guy maybe we should go back to that is that what happened yeah so she was starting a
new job and we were like we make too much money to um continue to live paycheck to paycheck and
knew something had to change so absolutely so were you both on board from the start i mean
you're like all right we're selling all the cars what who was on board first like who dragged who into it he's the spreadsheet guru um and so he would make the
spreadsheet we would do the zero dollar budget um i would make the grocery list i guess and we
would do rice and beans not literally but we dwindled down the grocery list so you brought
your lifestyle down to nothing and
you were willing to go like all these toys that we've acquired that we love that have all these
payments attached. We are going to sell them. I was very resistant to getting rid of my car,
but because he got rid of his truck, I said, okay, I'll do it. Was this like a, well, if you do it,
I'll do it or no, no. But the biggest thing for me was the $8,000 Discover credit card that was in my name only.
Once that got paid off, I was whole hog, basically.
I was like, okay, well, if that got paid off under my name, then I can do this.
And so once-
So you needed a quick win to go, this is possible for us.
That's the power of the debt snowball and Baby Step 2.
Absolutely, absolutely.
And we didn't sell our vehicles until
a year in so in fact the first year we uh didn't even keep track of how much debt we were paying
off and in fact it was november that year i was like hey i should probably check this out and see
how much i've actually paid off and we realized that kind of uh just doing it um partially i mean
not really being intense about it we uh we paid off $55,000 in that first year.
And I was like, whoa.
And that was basically like haphazardly.
What if we actually really paid attention and had a goal?
Yeah.
Wow.
So January of that next year, we led our first FPU class and sold my truck.
And then.
This is at your church?
This is another church.
We've actually led two other times
uh in the last uh that was our second class the first class we did was our small group at our
church oh that's cool yeah wow so has does your does your like congregation know about this journey
yeah they do they're in on it and they're like cheering you guys on yeah most definitely that's
fun yeah we like to see a pastor live it out and go, oh, this guy's really doing it. Yeah, it's crazy.
So I've been preaching for probably 14 years now,
and it's changed how I approach money and talk about money.
Like before, I was scared to talk about that.
I was like, oh, this subject I want to talk about in front of the congregation
because I was just being poor with it.
Well, you had your own shame around it.
Exactly, exactly.
And so it's helped us
us getting getting our finances in order has helped us be able to um to share the truth of
god's word you know freely uh when it comes to money i if if you're okay and you can just say
we don't want to talk about this you just have to do that in front of a whole bunch of people
um both of you the last few years, just the healthcare profession has shifted and changed
and it's just gotten tough, right?
On a thousand different fronts.
Absolutely.
There's something about going to work every day where you are doing the best you can as
a pastor and somebody's going to write you an email.
Somebody's going to complain.
Somebody's going to say something that breaks your heart because you really were doing your
best that day and this person really goes
there has to be some kind of freedom
that
heaven forbid
if either one of you just says I'm enough
that you're okay
right and when I've worked
with pastors I've worked with people in the medical profession
there's that angst that
I owe so much
it took me so much money to get here.
I had to get a doctorate in theology
or I had to get medical school.
By the time I get here,
I am stuck doing this thing,
which means I got to play by all these rules,
whether I agree with them or love them
or can even stomach them at all.
Both of y'all are completely free now.
What does that feel like?
It's such a burden just off our shoulders.
It's still surreal.
I still don't know how to live.
It's like getting off a boat all day.
You're back on land and it's still kind of wobbly.
What's next for you guys?
We're going to celebrate in Cancun.
We're taking our first vacation.
We're looking forward to it.
We've neglected vacations because of this.
Then next is obviously our
house oh that's so great next up and rumor has it that if you say no to some things and pay off
debts your kids will evaporate but i see your son he's still here he's still here and he has
he has uh been told no yeah with some things and he survived you made it yeah he survived wow how old is camden he's 12
okay and he got to see mom and dad hustle and sacrifice to to give him a better life to leave
a legacy yeah to see mom and dad because that's something that we weren't taught as as youngins
we want to change that and so we uh involved him as much as we could and we actually have a sheet
that we had up on the refrigerator that had all of our debts listed.
And we started with just our debts.
But then when we got to our end,
we had to go to every thousand dollars
just to kind of keep us going
because it was two student loans that were huge.
And so like, we was like, hey, we got to have something.
And so every thousand dollars he would mark off
and that was his part of it.
And so.
Well, we're going to celebrate with you guys.
We got two every dollar premium gift cards that you can use.
You can give them away just to say thank you for visiting us
and to cheer you on the journey.
You guys ready?
We are.
All right.
We've got Thomas, Suzanne, and Camden from Raleigh, North Carolina.
$167,000 paid off in 37 months.
They sold the motorcycle.
They sold the SUV.
They sold the truck, making $113,000 to $133,000.
Count it down. Let's hear
a debt-free scream.
3, 2, 1.
We're debt-free!
Woo!
Woo!
Nothing like it, John.
Can I tell you, I would love
to go into a hospital
and be served by somebody who doesn't owe any money,
who can focus on me.
I'd love to walk into a church and have a pastor
that is beholden only to God and what's right,
not to the whims.
No lender living in their head rent-free.
I love it. I love it. I love it, man.
What a gift. Y'all are amazing, good folks.
We'll be right back. This is The Ramsey Show.
Today's scripture of the day is Proverbs 12, 11.
Those who work their land will have abundant food,
but those who chase fantasies have no sense.
Ross Simmons says, hustle beats talent when talent doesn't hustle that's how i've lived my life john i don't think that's true i don't think that's true at all i think you should um pay close
attention to this ross simmons quote fair point fair point i'm more of a proverbs guy myself
oh i see what you did there let's go out to indianapolis and talk to Mona, not Lisa, just Mona. Hey Mona, what's up? Hi, thanks for your
help today. You got it. What's going on? My mom and dad, my elderly mom, parents are moving in
with me and my husband and they are giving us a lump sum to take care of them for whatever the
remainder of their life will be. And we've got a contract, everything's written up, but I want to make sure
that the lump sum is not taxable on either part, either side. Yes. Well, when it comes to gifts,
which this would be considered a gift, the donor is generally responsible for paying the gift tax.
And so, you know, if you look at the exclusions for the year, this year it's 18,000. So each parent could give you 18,000, which would be 36.
So what they could do is split it up over three years.
What is the urgency to give you all 100,000 at once?
Not to sit down every month and say, here's your rent.
We don't want to, like, talk about the finances every month.
And they're going to come with uh absolutely no bills
um they're not going to pay our electric or anything like that so okay and can i tell you
what i would do mona why don't you just take control of their you know you have access to
the checking account and you're covering the bills from their account instead of going to you
so even though they're giving me the 100 and,000 and it's actually for their expenses, I mean, they'll never have rent or anything.
It's still the $18,000.
You could still only do $18,000.
That's still considered a gift.
$18,000 from each parent.
Because I was just going to say the services that I'm rendering, like, they're not going to have to drive anymore.
They're not going to have to shop anymore.
I know, but you're doing this in the most complicated way possible.
Okay.
Why wouldn't you have them not give you...
Are there other siblings that are going to take their money?
No.
There's other siblings involved, but they're the ones that came up with this idea.
I would rather you take guardianship of their checking account
and you withdraw expenses
as needed. Okay. And if they don't trust you, because here's the deal. Let's say that the
hundred grand runs out in two years and they're still around. Are you just not going to get any
more money? Yeah, we haven't thought that one through. I would rather you... How old are they? Yeah.
They're 80 and 87, but my 80-year-old mother, her mother is still alive and she's 100.
That's what I'm saying.
What's the long-term game plan?
Yeah.
Are you guys okay to just take care of them forever?
We were just going to do $100,000 and look at it like, you know, whatever, however long they live.
We would take care of them if they had no money,
so we were just going to do it this way.
Yeah, I would rather you have access to their checking account and— Do you need this money to cover any bills right now?
Like, what if you just left it?
No, we don't.
Okay, well—
We don't.
Split it up when they pass away.
I'd rather them just invest this money if they don't need it,
and that $100,000 in seven years
turns into $200,000
and it becomes an inheritance
that one day you guys get blessed with.
Yeah.
And I already am on their checking account.
I haven't done anything yet,
but they put me on it years ago.
I would much rather y'all have a contract
that said we'll pay you $1,000
or we're advising you to withdraw $1,500 a month
or whatever for groceries and gas and this rent,
and you just pull it out.
That way it's not taxable in that way.
Okay.
It's just paying for expenses that are their expenses that they're accruing.
Because, yeah, you're right.
There may be 20 more years.
Yeah. And there's also a lifetime right. There may be 20 more years.
Yeah.
And there's also a life tax.
I wouldn't be concerned about taxes.
The taxes are the, you know, don't worry about taxes. My husband said my mom's going to outlive
him. I believe it.
And so we just need a long-term game plan. It sounds like
you guys are financially secure. Do you guys
have any debt?
We don't. And we've got our house paid off.
Amazing. You're doing it right. I've been listening to Dave since 2008. our house paid off it's amazing you're just for this moment
listening to dave since 2008 bless you and it's worked out so here's the deal i would just invest
that money and invest it wisely and when they pass one day that could be 25 years from now
then that'll just be part of an inheritance and it'll you know it'll all shake out but i don't
think we need to play this weird monopoly money game where you take money from them every month and they manage you guys manage it because you guys don't
need the money and can i tell you what i think would happen mona this is me being being honest
i think if you take a hundred thousand dollars from them this relationship gets real transactional
real fast and they start looking at you it's weird on my even on my. And they start looking at you. It's weird even on my part.
Well, they start looking at you as though,
no, no, no, no, no, we paid you.
You're going to do this, and you're going to do this,
and you're going to do this.
I would much rather them manage their checking account
through you, and they just live in your house now.
It sounds like they're feeling kind of guilty about this,
and this money is a way of them saying,
well, we gave them money.
Actually, I think, tell me if I'm wrong,
I think brother and sister, or I think
siblings came up with this idea because they feel bad
that you're taking the burden.
Yes.
My parents came up with it
too because some of their friends
are
broke now and they've been in like a nursing
home for two years and
it ate up $127,000
on one of their friends.
Okay.
Yeah.
So I would only use that money if you need to in order to take care of your parents because
you guys don't have the funds to do so.
I hope that never happens.
I hope this money just becomes a legacy that they get to leave.
And if you and your siblings need to feel, if they feel like, if y'all feel like you're
owed extra money, if you will, for the service, quote-unquote services rendered,
because mom moved in with you guys, or mom and dad moved in with you, y'all drove them around forever,
split that up during the inheritance with whatever's left.
But let your mom and dad spend their money while they're still alive.
Okay, that's a good idea, too.
Thank you.
I appreciate it.
You bet.
John's full of a lot of things.
Good ideas is one of them.
Occasionally. Occasionally. Just one of the things of things. Good ideas is one of them. Occasionally.
Occasionally.
Just one of the things.
Producer Kelly Daniels, shaking her head yes, absolutely.
Let's go out to Los Angeles, California.
Kelly, we're up against the clock for the last call of the day.
What's going on?
Hi, George.
Hi, John.
Yeah.
Hi.
So I'm 47.
I'm on baby step six.
I'm living in a town down here in Southern California that I've never really been happy with.
And I have the opportunity to move.
My job is 300 miles away from here.
And it's a farm property.
That's my business. And it's owned by my mother.
I have an opportunity to move there and live, um, basically rent free, but, um, I'm emotionally attached to this house here. I've lived here for three years. Um, like I said, it's in an area that
I don't want to live in. I don't want to end up here, but the actual house, I love it.
I don't know how to emotionally tear myself away from this property.
Why are you so emotionally invested in this home?
I don't know.
Just a bunch of studs and some drywall.
What did it mean to you? Did you move there after a divorces and some drywall. What did it mean to you?
Did you move there after a divorce?
Did somebody pass away?
What does it mean to you?
Oh, that's good.
Yeah.
It is kind of part of the divorce and part of the autonomy that, you know, I bought this
house all on my own after my divorce.
There it is.
Yeah.
So here's what I want you to do. I want you to write, this is going to sound cheesy and lame. There's going to be millions of people
across the country who roll their eyes at this, but I'm just talking to you. I want you to write
a thank you letter, a letter of gratitude to this home. And I want you to read it out loud in your
living room. Yeah. Because this home was there for you when nobody else was, right?
Yeah. And it served a purpose and it gave you a roof over your head and it gave you some security
and comfort when your whole world fell apart. And we're really grateful for that house.
And now we're going to go live the rest of our life because we're back on our feet again.
Yeah. Can you build a new dream home on the farm one day i definitely can and
in fact my dad started it and then he passed away and so it's so close to being done go get it go
get it that's your new emotional attachment that should be your new thing you get excited about
working on george is big on transference just move your emotional attachment for me don't deal with
it just move it over there.
I think that's fantastic.
But I'm selling the house and starting a new life on the farm.
Absolutely.
Thanks for the call, Kelly.
All right.
Thanks, everybody in the booth, including Kelly,
sitting in for the one and only James Childs.
Great show, George.
Good times.
And thank you, America, for listening and hanging out with us.
We'll be back soon on The Ramsey Show. Dr. John Deloney here.
Mental and emotional health challenges, broken relationships,
it's all just part of life,
but they don't have to define you. The Dr. John Deloney Show is here to help. It's a
collar-driven podcast where you can get practical advice on dealing with anxiety, loneliness,
depression, relationship challenges, your kids, and so much more. Listen to questions from our
callers, or if you're walking through a tough situation and need some help, give me a call. You were never meant to do life alone, and that's what this podcast is
all about. Follow along on Apple, Spotify, YouTube, or the Ramsey Network app. Remember, you're worth
being well.