The Ramsey Show - Financial Irresponsibility Always Has a Cost

Episode Date: April 8, 2026

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Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:04 Brought to you by the Every Dollar app. Start budgeting for free today. Normal is broke and common sense is weird, so we're here to help you transform your life. From the Ramsey Network in the Fair Winds Credit Union Studios. I'm Dave Ramsey. This is The Ramsey Show. Jade Washall, Ramsey Personality, number one best-selling author,
Starting point is 00:00:30 is my co-host today. Open phones at AAA-825-5-2-25. The call is free and some say the advice is worth Exactly what you pay for it. All right. Taylor is in Dallas. What's going on, Taylor? Hi, Dave. So I'm calling in me and my husband got married about seven months ago. And over the course of this tax season and gathering all of our documents, unbeknownst to me, he has not paid taxes for 23 or 24 and now 25.
Starting point is 00:00:59 And so, yeah, kind of a big deal going into a marriage wanting to know something like that. I'm very type A and on top of that sort of thing, I'm a W-2 employee, and so it's pretty simple, straightforward every year. He's a 1099 graphic designer, and so now this year, we're in years past, I would get a return. We are going to owe a pretty big deal on top of owing for 23 and 24. And so I just kind of want some advice on what to do. I will say, first and foremost, the same day I found out, I contacted the CPA, and we're in the process of, you know, we finalized 2025 and we're working on 23 and 24.
Starting point is 00:01:30 But definitely unexpected, you know, going into a marriage and now having what could potentially be up to a $35,000 or a $40,000 debt. Wow. Okay. So what does Mr. Creative say about is there a responsibility in lying to you? Well, he is, it has been a rough couple weeks. He obviously is very apologetic. And in his words, it wasn't intentional. It was kind of in the back of his mind and he knew it was not going to be good. But in his mind, he didn't realize it had been that long since he had paid taxes. That doesn't make me feel better. Makes me feel worse.
Starting point is 00:02:06 Yeah. Yeah. Like what else is rumbling? around in your little mind that you haven't told me about and you've forgotten and didn't think it was important. Yeah, that was definitely my first question as well. The first couple days when I asked him to pull up the IRS website so I could gather our documents and I realized that it had been that long. Yeah, that was not a good feeling. How long were you together before you got married? We've known each other for seven years. We've known each other since college. Okay. How long were you dating? On and off for a while, but about a year before we finally got engaged and got
Starting point is 00:02:39 married. Okay. Okay. Well, you did the right thing by getting on the ball and getting a CPA and getting a hold of this. It does point to a deeper issue because this all came about as a result of your diligence and you being on top of things and this was all solved as a result of your diligence and you're being on top of things, yes? Yeah, for sure. So that's where my issue is and that's probably where my conversation would start is this is a behavior that won't be able to continue. Yeah. Yeah. Have you started that conversation?
Starting point is 00:03:19 Not if you want to live. Well, here's the thing for being a young married couple, I've been intentional about us saving. And so we have a decent amount in the bank right now that once we know the whole of damage. That's besides the point. The money here is not the problem. I'm not concerned about that. You'll put money aside if you're concerned how we can talk about that. The problem here is my mom used to tell me she'd say the patterns that you allow from the beginning
Starting point is 00:03:42 will be the patterns that persist throughout the marriage. That's what she told me. She's right. If you allow things to persist. So for you, this is something that you guys have got to grab hold of immediately. And if I were in your shoes, I'd really be kind of searching my memory and searching my heart. Is there anything else that sounds like this that's been going on to where I'm seeing a pattern? Because if I'm seeing a pattern that I'm really concerned, if this is a thing, not a pattern. This is just a concealed incident. That's very different. I'm probably going to be approaching it a little bit differently. But nonetheless, this is a conversation. Have you had that conversation with him about the behavior, not the money, the behavior? Oh, for sure. That was the
Starting point is 00:04:23 first thing. Because to me, it's the dishonesty of not knowing that because that would have been vital information, you know, going into things. And so we've definitely, definitely had that conversation. And, you know, I did say it's not something I can just get over in a day. Like, this takes time, it is kind of a big deal, especially with the dollar amount. It is, you know, I file every year. I'm on top of this. And so to find out that not only are you not W2, which I knew, but to know that nothing's really been set aside with that in mind that, yeah,
Starting point is 00:04:51 I'm going to owe this amount. Here's where I want to get to if I'm you and him, for that matter, where we need to arrive at. Okay, you've already done the tactical things. You've figured out how you're going to pay it, and you figured out I get the filing done, all that's done. I don't want this to settle into you're his mommy and you spend the next rest of your life bailing this guy out. Every time he is irresponsible or forget something and throws it in the bucket of, oh, I'm a creative.
Starting point is 00:05:17 I don't do details. No, I'm going to kill you. It's not going to happen. So, I mean, I'm going to lose it right here. So I want you guys, instead of settling into that rhythm, I want you to settle into a rhythm that says, okay, you're a creative and you don't do details. I get that. but you have to get that while you're a creative, you also have to be an adult. And adults file taxes.
Starting point is 00:05:44 Adults take care of business, even if it's not their natural strength. So as long as we both are together on this and we're two adults making decisions about all the adult things together from this point forward and there's no more deception or no more I forgot and mommy take care of me, we're not going to, we're not going to run that script out in this marriage. We're going to be two grown people handling our responsibilities within our strengths. And you've got natural strengths toward detail and task orientation that he doesn't have. And that's fine. I have that. My wife is more of the free spirit that we call them the nerd and the free spirit.
Starting point is 00:06:23 You're the nerd. He's the free spirit. I'm the nerd. Sharon's the free spirit. So you can accept those things. But that does not give you a pass on emotional. carrying the weight of the household and the making of adult decisions together with me. You don't get a pass on that.
Starting point is 00:06:41 Yeah. And so as long as we can make, as long as you feel assured, maybe meeting with a marriage counselor a couple of times and you guys get some language to this that you can, that some tools in your belt so that he really grasps what this does to your psyche and that we're not going to have a pattern going forward, to your point. Jade, then I'm good with it. I think you've done everything perfectly. Just make sure that we're, okay, that however we got here is gone. We're not going to get here again. And the way we avoid that is the two of us standing side by side, both of our shoulders bearing the weight of being adults,
Starting point is 00:07:23 and then we make the decisions together. Then having said that, you know, he's going to have more of a natural tendency towards fun and creativity. You're going to have more of a natural tendency towards detail and task orientation, and that's good. We'll utilize those strengths in executing the plan that we develop together. Yeah, it's really important. I think a lot of times in the beginning of marriage, you kind of tiptoe around things. Everybody's still trying to be on their best behavior. You don't want to rock the boat.
Starting point is 00:07:47 You don't want to be too strong on certain things. But actually now is the time to really lean into those issues and try to get them right side up early on. Yeah. And she's so on it. Yeah. This is like... Listen, she's going to be the best thing that ever happened to him.
Starting point is 00:08:04 Yeah, he got lit up and he deserved to be. He deserved to be lit up. Oh, my gosh. Jordan is in Lansing, Michigan. Hey, Jordan, what's up? Oh, no, you're not up. You're going to be up after this commercial break. I'm going to learn to do this podcast radio thing one of these days.
Starting point is 00:09:00 You know, one of the first things I discovered working in the financial world is how absolutely devastating it is when the breadwinner of a family dies, and there's too little life insurance or none at all. Grieving families are suddenly left behind scrambling to pay bills and trying to make ends meet. I also discovered that there are a lot of rip-offs in the life insurance world, like that whole life crap posing as an investment opportunity. What you need is level term life insurance, usually 10 to 12 times your income, which is the smartest, most affordable way to protect your family. The key is finding an independent broker who represents a ton of companies and works for you, not for the insurance company. This is exactly what my friend Jeff Zander and his team at Zander Insurance are all about.
Starting point is 00:09:48 They shopped the term life companies to find you the best options, and they've been around for over 95 years. So you know they'll be there when you need them. Zander is the real deal, and that's why they've handled all my personal insurance for over 25 years. I trust them, and you can too. Visit zander.com. For instant online quotes, or for a more personal touch, give them a call at 800-356-4282. Jordan is in Lansing, Michigan. Hey, Jordan, how are you?
Starting point is 00:10:43 I'm doing better than I deserve, Dave. How are you? Just the same. How can I help? Well, I'm 20 years old. I've got a wife and a baby on the way. No debt, making a decent amount of money, saving up money for a house. What's decent money when you make?
Starting point is 00:11:00 I make about $70,000. And does she work outside the home? She is getting her nursing degree this spring. She'll be passing. So she works. She maybe sits a kid right now. So she's going to make more than you? Okay.
Starting point is 00:11:18 Probably. Definitely. I mean, a nurse ought to make more than 70, yeah. Okay. Cool. Good for y'all. Yeah. I'm just wondering if it's financially responsible to want to buy a bike before I buy a house. When I say bike, I mean motorcycle.
Starting point is 00:11:34 I would go with yes because. Yes, it's irresponsible. And my reason for just thinking that outright is one is strictly for you and the other is for the wife and the baby and the family and everybody else to live in. And for the future. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:52 The reason I'm asking you is I got a big, big tax return, and I was like, man, this is nice. I've got a nice big chunk of money that I didn't expect coming. Well, for the rest of your life, Jordan, you will fight between the little boy that lives inside of you and the man that has responsibilities. Yeah. And the interesting thing is if the man that has responsibilities wins the fight, the boy that lives inside of you gets. to buy his toys. Meaning that you do things in the right order. You'll get to bike someday.
Starting point is 00:12:29 And if it's not out of order, and it's out of order if you do it now. But I can easily see 20 years old. I mean, that's still, you know, but yeah, you got married and had a kid. Hello. And now, you know, so it just all of a sudden changed, right? So, and all your buddies, you know,
Starting point is 00:12:46 they may not have the same grown-up responsibilities that you've signed up for, recently. So, you know, that kind of thing. So that's the environment you're in. But yeah, the, the truth is when you're 30, which one will you be glad you did first, the house or the bike? You'd be glad you did the house first. Your 30-year-old version, or you won't look back at the 20-year-old version and go, come on, dude. You know, you know, you don't want the 30-year-old version talking to you, the 20-year-old version of you that way. Nope. And that's, so, yeah, go get your house, get out of debt, build an emergency fund, and buy some toys, and buy Buy her a nice couch or whatever it is she wants.
Starting point is 00:13:23 And you guys, you know, but you do that in the right order. You know, we're also not going to spend the equivalent amount on the baby's nursery, dressing up everything in the rental house while we're trying to save up for a home. And so, yeah, if you just go, what would the future version of me want to do? That's the mature side of every one of us. Then I get to do that. And by the way, I'm a guy that's got a pretty good collection of toys today. but I got them after they didn't matter financially and my family was more than taken care of
Starting point is 00:13:58 and we were set. And so now when I buy a toy, it's irrelevant to the financial situation. And that's the manly, the grown-up way to do it. But it's, you know, but you're, I'm 65. I still have that guy lives inside of me that fights with the other guy inside of me. And everybody does, right? That's right. So it's cool you ask the question, though.
Starting point is 00:14:21 That tells me you probably have a clue. Like you already knew the answer. Yeah, I was going to say his conscience was telling him. He wanted somebody else to tell him what he already knew. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Well, if we didn't tell him, his wife was going to tell him. We do a lot of that on this show.
Starting point is 00:14:35 I know. Those are my favorite calls. We tell people what they already know. And we make good money telling them what they already know. It's kind of ridiculous if you think about it. It's not bad. It's not bad. Bridger is in Salt Lake City, Utah.
Starting point is 00:14:48 Hi, Bridger. How are you? How are you doing? Better than I deserve. How can we help? Well, I'm newly married, about eight months married, and I and my wife previously got married, made some not best financial decisions, but we recently got access to $27,000 through a trust fund. And just wondering your guys' expertise on the best way to utilize that and turn our life around.
Starting point is 00:15:15 Cool. That's a great question. Yeah. Tell us about your current finances. You said he made some mistakes. What do those look like? So we have two car payments. We got one that is $16,000.
Starting point is 00:15:30 And then her car is $20,000. Mm-hmm. Both of those total up to $1,000 a month. They're both each $500. Wow, yeah. What's your household income? We both make $55,000. So $110?
Starting point is 00:15:46 in? Oh, sorry, both together. Oh, your total household income is 55? Correct. What are your careers? She is a receptionist, and I work for my dad. How old are you guys? I'm 21, she's 20.
Starting point is 00:16:05 Okay, so 16 on a car, 20 on a car, and what else in debt? We did have 8,500 on credit cards, but about a week after we got that trust fund, we paid all of those off. Did you cut them up? Not yet, no. You got to cut them up. When you get off the phone, get them out and cut them up. Otherwise, you're going to run them back up again.
Starting point is 00:16:30 Now, after you paid that out, after you paid that off, now there's 27,000 left, or is that less the credit card money? So that's what it started out as. Now we currently have 17. Got it. Okay. We had to spend $500 on a car repair, and then we already spent $1,000 on our discretionary spending. Got it. Is there any other debt laying around besides the cars?
Starting point is 00:16:53 That's a cool way of saying I just blew $1,000. Discretionary spending. What are you in Congress? No, definitely not. Is there any other debt besides the two cars? That's about it. It's just the two car payment. Okay.
Starting point is 00:17:10 Okay, okay. And you're 20 years old? Correct. 20 and 21. Okay. Okay, so there's two things that work here. First off, you guys' income, we got to get it up. Somebody's not working full-time hours.
Starting point is 00:17:23 Is that you or your wife? So we're both actually working about 40 hours a week. I'd try and work 50. Yeah, your job. Her receptionist job is not the best. She does not definitely make more. Yeah. She's a meditation on the side.
Starting point is 00:17:40 And so we're trying to get that up, but, I mean, that doesn't really bring really anything in the moment. Bridger, here's the thing. Here's some data points for you from 35 years of doing this. All right. I have never met someone that became a millionaire when they owned cars with payments. Okay. Yeah, I believe it. You're getting killed by your cars.
Starting point is 00:18:08 You signed up for it, but you're getting killed. by your cars. So what would I do if I woke up in your shoes? I don't know if I can talk you into it. But if I can, when you're 30, you have a shot at being a millionaire. If I can talk you into doing this. Sell both cars, have no payments, use the money to pay cash for a couple of $7,000 cars. Okay.
Starting point is 00:18:36 And buy a boring car, not a cool car. A boring car is one that... doesn't have a lot of miles that grandmother drove to church on Sundays only, and that your friends think you're a goober because you bought it. That's a good car. That's a good $7,000 car. Okay? Because if you buy a cool $7,000 car, it means somebody ragged out the Camaro.
Starting point is 00:19:04 That's the only way it's worth seven. Okay. Okay. So you want a Camry and a cord. stuff like that. I'm serious. A grandma car, a boring but car, pay cash for them, get rid of these two car payments, and then do what Jade was talking about, and let's work on your careers, and let's double your income in the next three years, and never have a car payment again. Because if you do, when you take out a car payment, what you are doing is you're looking in the mirror and saying,
Starting point is 00:19:33 Lord, I desperately want to be middle class the rest of my life. That's what you're saying when you take out a car payment because that's what the data tells us. Well, he's sacrificing so much money. If you were to take that money and invest it. What you put in car payments will make you a millionaire in 15 years. Oh, yes. If you took that car payment from today until age 61, so 40 years, that's $8 million, my man. Yeah.
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Starting point is 00:21:41 A lot of the old fogies in my age make fun of Generation Z and made fun of millennials, too. There's a percentage of every generation that's completely useless, and that includes my generation. There's my generation, the ones that were useless, we call them hippies, okay, and they're still smoking pot at 70 years old. And so they still get on weed. But a percentage of every generation is useless. And a percentage of Gen Z is useless. Their participation trophy collecting, living in their mother's basement, making fun of capitalism with a $1,200 Apple phone that their mother bought them. They're useless.
Starting point is 00:22:25 But we also get most of the Generation Z is pretty incredible. I think it's my favorite generation. I've done this for, you know, since the boomers were the target market. When I started this, I was in my 30s. Yeah. And so the target market was my generation. And that's who was having little kids and asking us the same questions we get asked. And so I've gone through X and Z and millennials and everybody.
Starting point is 00:22:54 And this Z's, I mean, think about we had two different 20-year-old callers already this hour. Yeah. both of them married, both of them making big boy, big girl decisions. That's right. Both of them making big girl, big boy mistakes. You're going to make mistakes. But owning them, coachable, both of them, if they do, and both of them, you did not get the pushback. Sometimes we get a pushback and we all know, all you listening and we know, they're not going to do it.
Starting point is 00:23:24 They're not going to do it. They're not going to do it. Those two, though, I think there's a chance both of them are going to do it. And so those two 20-year-olds are probably 30-year-old, million. because of that one phone call if they follow through. Absolutely. And that's why we come down here. That's why we turn these microphones on.
Starting point is 00:23:37 It's for you. Absolutely. Those of you that want to listen, those of you that want to do better, those of you that want to win and take the data of the decades of experience that the Ramsey Solutions has that started with me, but now it's with everybody else in the building. There's a thousand of us. The research, the data, the 30 years of being on this microphone taking these same phone calls with different little twists and turns to them, but they're still there. And so I'm really
Starting point is 00:24:07 excited about what 15 years from now all the Gen Zs look like, because they're a very serious, sober-minded, the good ones. Yeah. And I think there's more good ones than normal. Always, yeah. And they're not who they've been made out to be in the media. That's a bunch of crap. So I'm your biggest supporter if you're 22 if you're using your brain okay if you want to plug your brain in i'm i'm we're ramsie we're fans of you we're not going to put you down now you start the other crap i'll i'll knock you in the head just like i will any generation right you start telling me how capitalism it's the problem capitalism is not the problem you're the problem so get up off your butt leave the cave kill something drag it home that's you know get a job there's nothing new about that that's the same
Starting point is 00:24:54 in every generation. So, you know, and Donald Trump's not your enemy, and Joe Biden didn't neither. Neither one of them going to fix your life. Look at them. Come on. You got to do this. So all that stuff. And but I just, when we take these calls, I see patterns in these calls coming in like today. And it just gets me, I just want to share with you guys, observe what we're observing. It's exciting what this nation could look like, what this economy could look like based on people like those callers contributing to the economy and becoming a positive thing for their families, generational. Think about where their grandkids will be.
Starting point is 00:25:33 That guy, if he takes his car payments alone, he'll have $8 million at $65. Yes. You put it into the calculator while we were here. Plugged it in. What if he does that? Talk about this. I mean, and then what if the kids that he raises takes that $8 million and turns it into $80 million? Yes.
Starting point is 00:25:51 I mean, this is changing your family tree. This is what it looks like. And this is the power of God's ways of handling money, of grandma's ways of handling money. We call it common sense, but it's so rare it's like having a superpower. And so we just keep bringing it back to you all the time. And we just got to tell y'all, we're fans of you if you're 22 or 25. And it's assuming you're one of the good ones, okay? If you're not, then you're not going to like it when you call here because we're going to box your ears like we would anybody else,
Starting point is 00:26:20 because we love you and we want you to win. And we're going to get you on track. That's what we do. Sarah is in Albany, New York. Hi, Sarah. What's up in your world? Hi, Dave. Thank you for taking my call.
Starting point is 00:26:33 Sure. How can we help? I am calling because my husband and I, about two years ago, on his grandmother's house when she passed. And we were all fired up about it. It was my husband and I working on it, you know, with her own two hands together, fixing it. Problem is she'd lived in that house for about 50 years.
Starting point is 00:26:53 and not a lick and work with them to maintain it. And it is way more than we anticipated. And then fast forward to 2025. You know, we had a major structure fire. We're fighting with the insurance company in a different property. We lost my daughter. We had a major water break in the grandmother's house. Oh, you just drove, you lost your daughter.
Starting point is 00:27:16 Whoa, you drove by the what? A baby? I don't know. Your child? No, it was my oldest daughter. She's grown. Oh, how old was she? Oh, my gosh, honey.
Starting point is 00:27:29 Oh, wow. So, me as to say, all of the excitement and drive and, you know what, maybe you and I can do this. We can fix this house together. It's out the window. We can be fair our kids use. There's no fun left. All that drive is gone. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:45 So what is the condition of the property today? So when we purchased it, it was technically legally livable. but, you know, all the windows needed to be changed out. The electrical is not been tubing. The interior was from the 50s. What is the condition of the property today? So today we've replaced all the windows. The electrical's still there.
Starting point is 00:28:12 I had replaced a whole bunch of floors and done a whole bunch of painting in there. And then the water break, I mean, I'm talking a swimming pool. I'm not because nobody's living in it right now. So it wasn't caught right away. And that resulted in most of the interior work that we've done. Actually, I did most of that. What did you pay for the property? We paid $73, $75.
Starting point is 00:28:38 How much acre is with it? About a half an acre. It has two parking spaces. It technically has a garage, but it's sagging off. And it's like, question. If it went on the market as is, what do you think it could go for? What do you think you could list it for? If it went on the market as is, we would probably get like $70.
Starting point is 00:28:57 And it wouldn't qualify for traditional financing because... Yeah, but that's okay. See, if you could get $74, it you got $70 in it. Is it paid for? No. Well, you've put lots more in it. Oh, yeah. No, between what we paid for it, the closing costs and the money that we've put into it,
Starting point is 00:29:16 we're in it for a little over $100 right now. Yeah, but the money, do you have any debt? What debt do you have around it? So there's the loan that we took for it. It ended up being like 82, I think, for the purchase and the closing cost. You owe 82. And then on top of that, we put about $7,000 on Home Depot Guard, which is all into that house. And then we put other cash that we had into it as well.
Starting point is 00:29:47 Not even count. I'm not talking about cash. I was talking about debt. Okay, so in debt you have 82 and 7. Yes. Okay. And where are you living? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:58 So we don't live there. We have our primary home, which we still have a mortgage on as well. What is it worth? This house? Yes, ma'am. Maybe two. $200,000? Yeah, $200,000.
Starting point is 00:30:12 And what do you owe on it? I mean, it could be more if they fixed it a little bit. What do you owe on it? We owe about $75 left on it, I want to say. Okay. All right. Well, I mean, you have two options. One is dig deep and find some energy and get this thing fixed up and at least get your money out of it and sell it. I would not keep it. It needs to go away.
Starting point is 00:30:37 No, we're not keeping it. So I would fix it up enough that I could get my $90,000 out of it and lose some of the cash I put into it and all the effort I put into it. But you're going to have to dig deep to find the energy to fix it up that much. The other options take a complete whipping and probably sell both houses so that you've got the cash to take the whipping. But I really wouldn't do that. I dig deep and finish. Get it at least up to 90 and get where you can at least get the credit card paid off and the mortgage paid off and move on. And whatever cash you put in it, you just lost.
Starting point is 00:31:11 And we've all done stupid things and lost money. Welcome to the club. At Ramsey, we don't partner with companies chasing trends or pushing gimmicks. Trust is earned. And that's why we send people to Fairwind's credit union. See, a lot of banks rely on teaser rates, marketing hype, and fine print. But that's not how Fair Winds operates. They've been serving members for 75 years, and you don't last that long by cutting corners. You last by serving people well. There's a reason their name is on the studio wall. They've built products that help you manage money intentionally, not pull you into debt.
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Starting point is 00:33:17 Madison is in Pittsburgh. Hi, Madison, how are you? Let me try again. Hey, Madison, how are you? I'm good. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? So, I was wondering if it would be smart for me to move three hours away from where I live now to move in with my boyfriend so that I can build up a clientele where he's at and build my own salon. No. No. What's one thing got to do with the other? What's moving away got to do with building the salon?
Starting point is 00:33:59 I'm in right now. There's not as high of a demand because there are so many salons over here. And I also don't have the greatest relationship with my family. Okay. So I would rather be around people that want to be around me, such as the family and him. And he has also said that he would help me build what I am wanting to build if it's over there. So what kind of a salon are we talking about? Hair?
Starting point is 00:34:38 No, nails. I do nails. Okay. I love the idea of you going someplace where you can have the business that you want to have. I love the idea of you exiting what might be kind of a toxic relational environment with your family. I think that's all great. And if you've identified the right place to do that, I think that's fabulous. What I don't like is you tying up your business, your prosperity with someone that you're not married to.
Starting point is 00:35:02 Because what happens if this guy turns out to not be the guy that you marry? Well, now you're tied to him economically, which means if this starts going south, but your business is doing well, you might be less likely to end that relationship because you're economically tied up in it. Yeah, or worse than that. Your nail salon takes off really, really slow, and so you become financially dependent on a guy you're not married to, and he's now controlling the whole thing. Yeah, even worse. Really not a good thing for you, my little sister. I want you to be a standalone woman with square shoulders and a strong backbone. So we were planning in about a year, at a year and a half. We are going to get married. Great. How long have you been dating?
Starting point is 00:35:46 A little bit over a year and a half. Okay. How old are you two? I'm 19 and he's 20. Okay. And your nail salon clientele is going to be working in a salon with someone else and they have the rent and they bring you in and you work for them, but you build up a client base, or you're wanting to start a salon at 19 years old in a strange location where you know no one from scratch and build a whole business? Which one are you saying?
Starting point is 00:36:21 So I have a job lined up there for whenever I am out of school and I am licensed, which will be around two months from now, and I was going to work there for two to three years and then hopefully save up enough money to open up my salon on my own. Good, very good. I like that a lot. How can we help you solve the problem to where you can go there? Do what you're saying, but do it without living with your boyfriend. So where I'm stuck at is I'm not 100% confident in myself that I'll be able to run and manage my own salon.
Starting point is 00:36:59 No, you're not. You've got a job. Yeah. So go take the job. What does it pay? So it's really just going to depend on how many clients I get. I'm pretty sure it's going to be based off of I'm going to pay rent to rent a chair there and then probably pay a little bit in commission.
Starting point is 00:37:19 So there's no base pay at all? No. Do you have any money saved? Do you have any money to your name? I do. I work right now. I'm a home health care aide for my mom. I make $11.50 an hour.
Starting point is 00:37:32 and I have about a thousand saved. Okay. Okay. So how are you not going to starve to death when you go take this job on straight commission with no base pay? So I was planning on moving over there, and before I get licensed, I'm going to, it really just varies on when I'm going to get licensed. I was going to start at a different job, and then whenever I have enough saved up to be enough saved up besides my. emergency fund to be able to... I think I know why your parents are a problem for you, because they're telling you that this is dumb, and you don't want to hear that.
Starting point is 00:38:15 It's not exactly that. I just don't... I've never really had a good relationship with my dad. My mom fully supports me. I just think you need to get yourself in a better spot before you do this. This is a nightmare looking for a place to happen. Okay? Okay. So you don't have any money, and you don't have a job lined up to eat. And so what 100% the screams is, you're going to be dependent on this guy that you're not married to from the first moment you make this decision. And you don't do that unless you're married. It's not good for you. It's a dangerous, vulnerable situation for you. He kicks you out.
Starting point is 00:38:53 You know what you are? Homeless. Yeah. Uh-uh. I'm not going to let anybody I love do that. Okay. And we love you. and we're going to talk you out of it.
Starting point is 00:39:07 And by the way, even if he was the best guy ever, why would you want to put yourself in that position where you're completely dependent on him? That's not a great look for you. Unless you're married. If you're married and he has an income and he wants to support the family while you get your first and second job going here
Starting point is 00:39:26 and all that kind of stuff, that's fine. But if he's not, then we're just playing house. This is dangerous for you. And there's no reason for you to put. yourself in that position. I just wouldn't do it. I don't. If you, you know, you need a, you need a different set of income, a different set of savings to protect you to allow you to be a standing as a standalone grown woman operating in the, operating her own home and then be dating this guy. Yeah. Or be married to him. Yeah. I don't think y'all are wanting to get married right now
Starting point is 00:39:58 because you don't think you're ready and I wouldn't disagree with that. If I were her, I'd probably keep doing what I'm doing and try to get a job at a local salon, save a-a- as much money as I think, you know, I need to be able to make that leap and get my own apartment and really do this like an independent person. And if you need to just have no contact with your family, but you live in the area where they live, that's fine. Yeah, sure. It's not a big deal. Just set up a boundary. Just I'm not going to interact with you people. You're morons. I mean, you can just, just, that's fine. You can do that. But I want you to have, you know, some safety for you because when you have to bet everything on someone else that is not legally bound
Starting point is 00:40:35 to you, that is a very dangerous scenario for you. And we get the call when this 19-year-old beautiful Madison is 25 and she's living in her car. And she calls us because he kicked her out. Oh, and there's a baby now. But there's no, you know, we can't find baby daddy because he's not actually the husband. And this is this is a guaranteed way to end up. spending the next decade of your life in poverty, don't do it. Please, honey, please, please, please, please don't do this to yourself.
Starting point is 00:41:15 So, okay, I don't, the, you have to be able to put, when you're making big decisions, you have to be able to put all of the key elements of the decision on a piece of paper and look at them. And they all have to line up and say, this life-changing major decision, I'm making, you know, all of these things say it's a good idea. And when we list them down for you, Madison, all of them say it's not a good idea. Well, you have to run it, you have to run it through not just best case scenario, but through worst case scenario. You have to look at the worst case scenario. Absolutely. Well, I mean, best case scenario is you don't have any income. Yeah. And you're waiting on clients to walk in the door and you're paying chair rent.
Starting point is 00:42:06 and you're living with him and you don't have any income. So from day one, you are 100% dependent on this guy to eat and to have shelter. That's your best case. Yeah, you're just worth way more than that. When you've worked hard to buy a car the right way, you paid cash with no payments hanging over your head.
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Starting point is 00:44:02 I'm Dave Ramsey. Jade Washaw, Ramsey, personality and number one bestselling author is my co-host. Alex is in Portland, Oregon. Hey, Alex, how are you? Hey, doing good, Dave. How are you? Better than I deserve. How can we help? Yeah, I want to know if I can just invest 50,000 into my retirement account and then just work on retirement minimally for the next 30 years until I retire. Well, the regulations don't allow you to put it into a 401k or a Roth IRA at that sum, that lump sum. So no, you can't do that, but could you invest it? Can you invest it and say, in your own mind, that particular mutual fund is my retirement account?
Starting point is 00:44:48 You could do that, but you can't just randomly add $50,000 to a Roth or a 401K. Yeah, that's kind of my goal. As of right now, I have about 20,000 invested into various 401Ks and Roth IRAs. I'm about to max out my Roth IRA for this year. I'm on baby step number four right now, but I don't have kids. If you're on baby step four, then no, I would not do that. What's the purpose of you wanting to do it that way? Is that in your mind? You have a mortgage, right? No, actually, my mom is, she's going to help me out with a tiny home, and I've always kind of lived under my means. My real goal is just kind of travel the world and just really kind of enjoy the next, you know, 20 years because I'm probably going to end up taking care of my mom when she gets
Starting point is 00:45:38 into her elder years because she's single, so she's going to need help. So as of right now, like I said, I have about 20,000 invested, and my job is going to allow me to get to about 50,000 that I can invest, you know, this year pretty easily. And I guess what my question is, is can I just invest that all into a mutual fund through a brokerage account and then just kind of enjoy the next 20 years of my life? You could, but it's not enough. Okay. What would? 50,000 will create $5,000 a year income.
Starting point is 00:46:16 Okay. It's a great place to park the money while you. travel, but it's not a solution to say, and after that, I'm never investing again. I don't mean never investing again. It's just like right now with my job, I make, I work a full commission job, but I am projected to make probably about $180,000 this year. How old are you? I'm 36. Okay, and you're single, obviously. I'm single. Yeah, completely debt-free. I just paid off my car and I realized that I never want to be in debt. I work in home improvement.
Starting point is 00:46:50 Okay. All right. Okay. You're mathematically not ready to do what your dream is yet. Okay. You're going to have to work a few more years to do that. And so, I mean, you're making $180,000 a year. If you need $30,000, if you need $50,000 a year to travel, then you need a half a million.
Starting point is 00:47:19 Oh, no, no, that's not what I meant. I'm thinking of just bringing my retirement up to $50,000. I put the numbers into your website and I was looking over. And then quit, and then go travel the world. No, I mean, I would work periodically. I just want to, you know, take a month off here, a month off there, come back and work and then, you know, just kind of have the majority of my money go towards traveling and then anything that I don't spend go towards retirement. Right. The majority of the money that you're earning, not that lump sum. That lump sum is just going to go away forever. Correct. That's just going to go into my brokerage account and max out my 401Ks every year. Okay. It's never a bad thing to invest. And so investing is a good idea. It's never a bad thing to have fun. So having fun is a good idea. It's never a bad thing to be generous. As a matter of fact, people that are wealthy and healthy do all three. and so yeah I think now that I'm understanding your plan a little bit better I thought you said you were I misunderstood I thought you were saying I want to put $50,000 away and never work again and go travel the world and I'm like yeah dude you're gonna you're gonna be skinny you know the 180 that you make now what do you think it'll go down to when you're kind of doing this plan and working periodically and what do you anticipate that being it's performance based I mean I I I I It was pretty thin last year, and it went down to 80, just because business was slow.
Starting point is 00:48:50 You know, I guess the market I was in was a lot slower than what I'm in now. What I'm getting at is if it's just you, you're still earning a fine income. I mean, $80,000 while traveling. Is there a way where you can still do some investing and that you're not putting it completely on hold? Yeah. I'm kind of wondering what a good number to shoot for would be after I hit that, after I invest that the rest of the 50K. I think it's whatever number allows you to continue to do what you're planning to do, but I don't necessarily know that you need to live on 80,000 while you're traveling. Maybe it's 60.
Starting point is 00:49:25 So if you make 80,000 and you put 15% of that away and you have an emergency fund and you spend the rest of it on travel and living, you're going to be okay. Yeah, I've always been minimalist. Yeah, I've always been minimalist. So, I mean, I've, you know, I've spent as little as like a thousand dollars a month before. That's what I'm saying. I think you can do both. I don't think you have to say I'm not going to invest anymore. I think that you can continue to do that. So I want you to work enough that you make at least 80.
Starting point is 00:49:56 And I want you put 15% away and I want you to take as much time off as that allows you to take off and travel. And put the 50K with a smartvester pro. Go sit down with one. Go to Ramsey Solutions.com. Click on SmartVestor. You sit down with a professional investment company. They'll help you, teach you, show you, and understand. understand your plan and what you're trying to do.
Starting point is 00:50:17 And now that I understand a little bit more. But if you could do that right there, put 15% away, travel, live minimalist. Right not. Make a minimum. Work enough you make 80. Then you're making more than most people. And you can go travel. Have at it.
Starting point is 00:50:32 Have at it. Oh, and by the way, as young as you are, your mom's young, maybe she ought to actually have a freaking plan so she has some money. Good point. so that she's not a burden in her old age. There's an idea. Man. So I had a really crass friend that was in his 80s, and he was a multimillionaire.
Starting point is 00:50:58 And he was kind of a jerk, honestly, but he was a friend. But he used to say this all the time, and I don't like it, but there's enough truth to it that it needs to be said. He said, you know what an old man is that's broke? I said, no. In the way. He said, you know what an old man is that's rich? I said, no. He said, Grandpa.
Starting point is 00:51:23 Oh, well. I don't like that. Listen, he's not wrong. You know, one of my goals is to not be in the way. Yeah, be Grandpa. I don't want to be in the way. Man. Listen, he's telling the truth.
Starting point is 00:51:39 Well, he's grouchy. I think Oscar in the trash can on Sesame Street. This guy's got that down. But yeah, yeah. But still, I'm like, I don't like that. Not everybody, no. And people aren't that. Yeah, they are.
Starting point is 00:51:54 You don't want to be the burden. Yeah, I don't want to be the. I don't want to work my whole life and then be a problem. Yes. You want to be able to be fun. If I end up working in McDonald's at retirement, it needs to be the one I own in St. Thomas, you know. Come on.
Starting point is 00:52:10 Hello. I don't need to be, you know, I don't want, I'm sorry. I'm not mad at you people, but there's no chance I want to be a Walmart greeter as my retirement golden years, okay? No chance. I don't mind saying hi to you in Walmart, but I don't want to be paid to do it. Hello. Yeah, walk by. So, come on.
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Starting point is 00:53:26 your money well. And right now, CHM's offering new members a 50% credit towards their first month of membership. Get started at CHministries.org slash budget and use promo code Ramsey. That's CHministries.org slash budget and promo code Ramsey. Ann is in New York City. Hi, Ann. How are you? Hi, I'm great. How are you guys? Better than we deserve. What's up? I love it. So I had a question about life insurance and estate planning. My husband and I are in our mid-30s and we have a two-year-old baby. I knew that term life insurance was something that we had to get. But I recently got into a car accident. I'm okay. My car's totaled. And that really brought this task of, of, you know, life insurance much more to the forefront. Good. So I weren't.
Starting point is 00:54:25 I'm sorry you went through the car accident, but I'm glad you're awake. Okay, good. Yeah, yeah, thank you. We've been working very diligently in baby steps too, and we're about like three or four months away, all depending on when we get our refund because we're just going to put everything to the final debt. So with the term life insurance should,
Starting point is 00:54:45 I'm assuming we should be putting that as a line item now. Yes. probably adjusting our, okay, right, that makes the most sense. Yes. So then my follow-up question is when it comes into budgeting for like estate planning, I know we're going to have to hire a lawyer, draw up a will, and all of that stuff is going to cost more money. You know what?
Starting point is 00:55:04 You might not need to do all that just yet. You could take the wills quiz that we have, and you might be able to just do one online quickly with Mama Bear and not get any, not do any lawyers or anything like that. What's your net worth? I think I'm at 10,000 now. Yeah, you don't need a lawyer. Just do a state-specific will.
Starting point is 00:55:25 Yeah, you just need to go to. So let me help you, both things. We can do both things for you. They're both trusted people that we've done business with for years and years and years and years. So Xanderinsurance.com, Z-A-N-D-E-R, for 30 years. I've told people to go to Zander. They're my insurance agent. Jeff Zander is a personal friend of mine.
Starting point is 00:55:46 Okay. Okay. And they shop among a gazillion companies to get you the best possible deal on a term policy. Okay. Okay. And then go to Mama Bear legal forums.com and like 70 bucks, you can have a will done. And it's perfect for you in New York. All wills should be state specific. And so this is software that will print out a will for you that's for New York.
Starting point is 00:56:12 You have to feed into it what you want the will to say. And then it'll print it out and then you sign it. and it'll tell you what the proper notary or whatever you have to do in New York is. I don't know that, but some states require a notary witness, some just require a witness, some don't require anything. So you just got to know your specific state, and they'll tell you every bit of that, and it's like $50 to $70, you'll have the whole set of documents. You'll have a full estate plan.
Starting point is 00:56:36 You'll have your life insurance in place, and your budget won't skip a beat. Okay, I love it. I suppose the follow-up question as well. So my husband and I, we have combined earnings are about 150 a year, but each of us have side businesses that have been doing well, and we love it. So I know that once we get past Baby Steps 3,
Starting point is 00:56:59 then I know we're on track to becoming the Baby Seths Millionaires. So when our network continues to increase, I'm assuming that the life insurance policy and the state-specific will, something that we can upgrade. Yes. I suppose in a few years. Yes.
Starting point is 00:57:16 Okay. Mm-hmm. Yeah, if you start to have a multi-million dollar net worth, you need a lawyer to do your estate plan. Okay. It's worth paying an attorney at that point. Yeah. If you, you know, unless there's just something super simple about your will and everything,
Starting point is 00:57:33 it's okay. You can still do it. You could have a $10 million net worth and be just fine with a simple will for Mama Bear. Unless you move states. But if you want to spend a little bit of money at that point and have an attorney look at it, that's perfectly fine. nothing wrong with that. And life insurance, you could just add some more policies if you want. Keep in mind, Ann, that what you want to buy is 15 to 20 year level term insurance,
Starting point is 00:57:53 and it should be about 12 times your income on you, about 12 times his income on him. And that way, if something happens to you in a car accident, God forbid, he could take that amount of money the 12 times your income and invest it, and it will produce your income without touching it. And so let's just say you made $100,000. And so you took out a million two and he invested a million two. That will create $100,000 of income without touching the million two forever, perpetually. And so that's where we came up with those numbers. And here's the thing.
Starting point is 00:58:35 You're in your 30s. If you're not overweight and you don't smoke, a million dollars then cost $1,000. hard, it's the cost of a pizza to get life insurance. And it's just ridiculous that people don't have it. So you need to go get your stinking. Let's do the things she's talking about. And I'm really glad she called and I'm, uh, I'm sorry she had that accident, but I'm really glad it woke everybody up. And we said, hey, we got to deal with all these things because stuff happens in life. Yeah, she's paying attention. And that's, that's the best thing you can do is pay attention to what's going on, be intentional about making those solutions. And don't wait. Life insurance is not a baby step. And I think that's,
Starting point is 00:59:10 the thing to remember. I remember having that aha moment, even back when Sam and I were paying off our debt, because the truth is you do wrestle with it in your mind. You think, oh, gosh, I'm cutting in so many areas. I'm too broke to die. Yeah. And the last thing you want to do is add something to the budget. Right. And you really do have to because you just don't know what tomorrow holds. Wow. This is true. Cade is in Dallas. Hey, Cade. What's up? Hey guys, how's it going? Better than we deserve. How can we help?
Starting point is 00:59:43 Perfect. So we're in a pretty good situation, but my wife and I were having a discussion. I would call it a disagreement, but a differing on opinions. Sounds like a disagreement. We have. Right. I appreciate it. And so we have about five rental properties, not about five rental.
Starting point is 01:00:07 have by rental properties and our main property, as well as a good amount. I say a good amount, right? That's subjective, but about 75K in cash in our bank and about 150,000 in stocks. And so we were, we're all about paying off debt, but right now we're in a pretty good position. Two houses paid off, three houses with mortgages, and then one house with a pretty big mortgage, which is our primary resident. And your household income is what? I make about 150.
Starting point is 01:00:39 Wife makes about 75, so 225. Got you. Got it. Very good. Okay. And what's the balance of your home mortgage? 350. Okay.
Starting point is 01:00:50 Cool. And how old are you guys? 40 and 35. Cool. You've done really well. Congratulations. It's fun to have these discussions because you got to this point. So if you're asking what I would do, are you?
Starting point is 01:01:04 Mm-hmm. Well, I sell the stock and take the 75K, that's 2 and a quarter, and I'd put that on that $350 by close of business today. Okay. I'm assuming you have an emergency fund in addition to the 75, right? No, the 75 is just cash in our price, so we would, but, you know, let's just say we need 25 in there for the emergency fund. Yeah, okay, throw, okay, then put, and put 200, that leaves 150, and then that brings up the question you were going to ask about whether we sell one of the rentals, right? Right. So then the question becomes, so, you know, back in, I would say, about 10, 15 years ago, I got into the real estate craze, listened to all the gurus. And I've heard you say before, you know, rentals come with their fair share of problems. And I have a fair share of dog day stories for you. But nonetheless, came out the other side, okay. And all of them are cash flow, you know, quote unquote cash loan. Okay. So the two that are paid for, what are they worth? Each. $200 and about $150.
Starting point is 01:02:03 Okay, and the other two, and you have three then that have mortgages? Correct. Those are 50, 100, and 150. Again, these are just ballpark numbers. Just small mortgages. Okay, good. Good. All right.
Starting point is 01:02:16 And is there any of, who wants to sell some of the houses to get the debt paid off? That would be my wife. I suspect. She's completely bought into the, let's go debt-free. I like her. Okay. Yeah. Okay, so here's the thing.
Starting point is 01:02:30 The only question, the only thing we're arguing about is not, when, not if we're going to be debt-free, it's just when? Yes. Okay. Yeah. Okay. That helps the argument. Okay.
Starting point is 01:02:42 Because if the argument is, I'm going to stay in debt the rest of my life, we've got a different discussion. But if it's like, okay, I got small balances on these things. I got this pile of money so I can throw 200 at the house. Let's get the house knocked out. And then we'll whittle away on the mortgages on the rentals. And you'd map that out. And you say with a $225,000 income, it's going to take us four years to do all that.
Starting point is 01:03:02 or if we sell one of them, we can do it in two years, or if we sell two of them, we can do it real fast. That's the argument. So we're arguing about two years or four years or whatever these numbers are. We're really not arguing about the concepts. And so I don't want to give up these houses. I would rather fight with it for four years. She's saying, I want to be done today.
Starting point is 01:03:25 If we gave up two of them, we could be done today. And that's about the numbers, roughly. And that's the only argument is whether we, what are we going to do with the next four years? And either, either answer is in the wise column. So we're not going to, we're not going to call it for you. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Financial stress does not just damage our bank accounts. It can also take a toll on our mental and emotional health and our relationships. Money worries cause anxiety and they are one of the leading sources of conflict for all types of couples. I know this. My wife and I have struggled with money, for years. Listen, therapy can help even with money conversations. Therapy is not about financial advice, but it can help you build healthier ways of coping, give you strategies to communicate about money, and give you a plan moving forward. I want you to consider talking to my friends at Better
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Starting point is 01:04:53 H-E-L-P.com slash Ramsey. We wish we could get to every call and question here on the show, but we can't. You can't get through. There's not that many lines. So if you have a money question and you want an answer for your situation, we've got a tool for you to help you. Head on over to our website and use Ask Ramsey. Ask Ramsey is our free AI tool that's built and trained on Ramsey Proven Principles. We downloaded several years of answers from this show into the data.
Starting point is 01:05:43 All the financial peace university lessons, all the articles we've written that are on our website, and the books we've written are all downloaded into that. So AI knows what Ramsey would say. One of us here on the show would say, and it will give you that answer free. And it's not polluted with outside confused information from Reddit or TikTok or other stupid places that people get bad information. Instead, you could just go to Ramsey Solutions.com and ask Ramsey. And you'll get a Ramsey answer to your question. If you want to know what we think, it's an easy way to do it, and it's completely free.
Starting point is 01:06:22 Ian is in Atlanta. Hi, Ian. How are you? Hey, Dave. I'm doing good. I appreciate all your help through the years. My wife and now, you've helped us out a lot getting our finances and orders. So I appreciate all that.
Starting point is 01:06:33 Thank you. We found out before Christmas, my father-in-law was, had fallen into some scams, thousands of dollars. He actually maxed out all his credit card, and then he wound up mortgaging the house to pay out the credit card debt. we think he may even now have gone so far as to get a reverse mortgage on the house. Tomorrow he has to go to Small Claims Court to deal with one last creditor, about $2,500. The only income he has legal, legitimate income, is his Social Security. So we're not sure where to help him, we're to step in and help him at this point. He hasn't let us not help him, but he hasn't given us a lot of room to help him.
Starting point is 01:07:11 But it's, you know, tomorrow he has to go to court, and we're just not sure what to do, what he can expect there and what to do after that. Because like I say, it's this one last debt and all he has is the house and social security. We don't want him to wind up homeless. How old is he? He is 80. Okay. How has he been clearing the other debts?
Starting point is 01:07:30 You said this is the last one. Yeah, the rest of him, when he mortgaged the house, he paid everything off, but he missed this one card. Understood. He actually wrote him a letter and explained the situation to him, and they still moved forward with it. Like I said, he got the letter in the mail that he has to be in court tomorrow for this last $2,500. Who's the creditor, do you know? I do not now. Okay.
Starting point is 01:07:52 All right. What are you thinking about? Are you thinking about? I'm sorry, what state is he in? Georgia. Okay. All right. Go ahead.
Starting point is 01:07:59 I was going to say, what are you thinking about paying the $2,500 form? Is that what's on your mind? No, we're not. We're not giving them any more money. Got it. My wife says, you know, that's her dad. She's helping out some. I'm not entirely sure.
Starting point is 01:08:12 You know what? you know, she's doing, but I know she's not doing a lot because we know how bad it was. We actually, we actually wound up, I took his cell phone. I was paying for his cell phone. He was supposed to pay for it. We actually went over to the house ticket from him. So, you know, to try not to keep him, keep her from happening again. But, yeah, we're just trying to find out what he can expect tomorrow from the court. Can they get to? All he has is Social Security. What can they get? What can they do? Well, to start with what will happen tomorrow is uneventful. Have you ever been to traffic court for a ticket? Right, yeah. Like the first time you go to traffic court, you're like, ooh, I'm going to court. And then you go in there and it's kind of funny. It's kind of not much to it.
Starting point is 01:08:50 It's uneventful, anticlimactic. You know what I'm saying? They tell you what you already know. Yeah, that's exactly what's going to happen to him tomorrow. Okay. So these attorneys have entire cases, boxes and boxes and boxes of people that they're suing tomorrow. They roll them all in on two wheelers. No one comes to oppose them.
Starting point is 01:09:11 and they get judgment on all of them in about 10 minutes. Okay. They don't go through them one by one by one by one. The only one they will pull out is if someone actually shows up. So if he actually shows up, they'll pull it out and they'll talk about it, but they will do nothing because here's the deal. The guy legally owes $2,500 and he has not paid the bill. Right.
Starting point is 01:09:40 He will lose the lawsuit. I got scammed is not a defense. Right. Okay. So he loses tomorrow. And they take a judgment lien tomorrow. Now then on to your question, what can they or will they do with a judgment lien? 98% of the time on $2,500, they'll do nothing with it because it's too much trouble.
Starting point is 01:10:03 It's not enough to screw with. Okay. Okay. But they take the judgment lien. If they're in a state where they can garnishy, they can clean. They can clean out bank accounts and they can garnish he wages. They cannot touch Social Security in any state. Okay.
Starting point is 01:10:21 They could take a lien on his house. But were they to do that in the state of Georgia? And they would have to go through, they'd have to spend $1,000 to $2,000 to do a foreclosure to collect $2,000, and they end up owning a house, which, by the way, has a mortgage on it. Right. and they get to keep that mortgage. The bank does. So the chances that a bank takes on $100,000 or $50,000 or whatever mortgage to try to collect $2,500 on a credit card is zero. Never seen it happen in 40 years.
Starting point is 01:10:55 Okay. Not going to do it. So they take a lien on the house so that if the house ever sold, they get paid, and they will do that. Okay. In most states, as soon as the judgment is final, it's an automatic lien on property that you own. I don't know for sure in Georgia if it is. it is in Tennessee. Okay, so as soon as the judgment's final tomorrow,
Starting point is 01:11:15 and they recorded at the courthouse, his title is now clouded. If he tries to borrow money on the house or try to sell the house, they have to get paid because they now have a lien on the house. But they won't execute on the lien and force the sale of the house. It's not practical. Not practical. Right.
Starting point is 01:11:33 And as long as his Social Security comes to an account that is standalone and doesn't have any other money in, it, they can't take the money out of that account because it's Social Security money. Right. But if he has, if he's got $10,000 laying somewhere, which he doesn't, based on the story you told me, but if he had $10,000, he probably would have paid this bill, right? But, but, but, but, but yeah. So basically he is largely what we call judgment proof.
Starting point is 01:12:03 There's not a lot they can do with the judgment. Right. Because he's too stinking poor. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Yeah, and we're trying to help him, but it's just, yeah, it's, I mean, he's probably gotten these calls before. You know, it's frustrating to hear about other people falling into these scans, and then, you know, what kind of scam was it?
Starting point is 01:12:23 Yeah. Well, Dave, he was going to marry Jennifer Aniston. Oh. Okay. And he was, you know, getting to buying the Apple gift cards and sending $100,200 here and there and just. Not bad work if you're ready. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:40 Yeah. Romance scam, huh? Wow. Yeah. And it was one of the big ones, too. So, yeah, I mean, you know, we've heard other people fell into it. We just never, I thought, how do you fall into that? And then it hit my father-in-law.
Starting point is 01:12:57 Yeah. I'm so sorry. Yeah. Yeah, it's heartbreaking. But it sounds like the money is gone. It doesn't sound like it's recoverable from anything. and so my guess is that tomorrow will probably end the drama on the 2,500. Okay.
Starting point is 01:13:14 Until you all sell the house after he passes away. Okay, okay. Because he was talking about not even going. What's good would it do to go? He's right. He's right. Yeah. You're going to lose.
Starting point is 01:13:25 You just walk in there and you're going to lose. There's no, they can't, they don't send you to driving school. You know, it's not that part of traffic court. But you're just, you're going to lose because there's no defense. There's not a, you know, there's no. fraud or something like that committed. It's not identity theft. It's not he borrowed the money and he signed up for the debt.
Starting point is 01:13:45 He didn't pay it. He loses. It's very simple and very cut and dried. And I promise you, there'll be a thousand at least in these cardboard boxes sitting there. And they'll all go, boom, with one drop of the hammer, right? One smack of the gavel and it's over. And it's like a conveyor belt for lawsuits. a lawsuit factory and it's boring is what it is but unless you're the one that's all freaked out
Starting point is 01:14:15 because of it yeah so anyway i i think he's okay i think he's probably in good shape i can't be 100% sure but based on what you told me i don't know of anything that any way they can get to him at this stage because everything's gone basically rachel is in baton rouge hi rachel how are you Hi, Dave. I'm good. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? My question is, is it smart to do a balance transfer that is offering a zero percent APR for 20 months to take care of a portion of a personal loan that my husband and I have? A personal loan to who? It's with a SOFI loan that we have. Oh, gross. How much is SOFI screwing you for?
Starting point is 01:15:39 We have 15,000 left. And what's the interest rate? 12.31%. Aren't they helpful? I know how they paid for that stadium now. Okay. 12%, huh? On 15,000.
Starting point is 01:15:55 And what's your household income? Before taxes, 112,000. Okay. So how fast you're going to pay off the 15? Well, we would like to pay it off within a year and a half. That's awful. Is there something ahead of it? Is that why it would take so long?
Starting point is 01:16:16 Like, do you have other debts you're attacking first? We have, we still have a thousand left to pay off on a furniture that we brought. And then we also have a car loan. We have 18,000 left on that. And then starting back in July. I was going to say the car shouldn't come before the 15,000. Okay. Our payment is pretty hard.
Starting point is 01:16:40 payment is $679. Right. So what we have learned is the fastest way to get out of debt and the most sure way to get out of debt when it comes to everything but the house is to list your debts, smallest to largest, pay minimum payments on everything but the little one and attack the little one with a vengeance. And I mean no eating out. I mean no vacations. I mean nothing scorched earth on your lifestyle. and you attack these debts. You make too much money to be this freaking broke.
Starting point is 01:17:14 And if I'm you, I'm going to pay all of this off in just over a year. A year? Yes. But you have no life during that year. You understand me. And right now you're trying to slow walk this and figure out some interest rate that gets you out of debt. There is not an interest rate to get you out of debt. Well, it gets you out of debt is when you get so pissed off.
Starting point is 01:17:40 that you've been screwed over by SOFI and the car companies, that you attack this stuff with a vengeance. Are you guys doing anything outside of your normal jobs, any side hustles, anything to bring in extra money? No, we aren't. That's the key. I'm telling you, that's the key to knock this out, because the longer the horizon on this,
Starting point is 01:18:02 the less likely you are to complete it. If you're not attacking this with intensity, it's just going to be, I'm tired of doing this. Oh, we've done it long enough. We paid off the car. That's good enough, right? You've got to be intense, which means the income that's going towards this debt has got to be as high as possible. Yeah. And the outgo is nothing. I mean, I'm not kidding. Do not see the inside of a restaurant unless you're working there as your extra job. Because if you did that, if you committed, if you and your husband both said, man, we're both going to do a side hustle. We're both going to bring in an extra $2,000 or $3,000 a month. Oh, my goodness.
Starting point is 01:18:38 So, Rachel, here's the deal. You can wander into debt, and we've helped more people get out of debt than any other organization in America. We know what we're doing. You can wander into debt, but you cannot wander out. You have to get angry about this situation so angry that you become sacrificial in your lifestyle because you want rid of this, because it's standing between you. and prosperity. It's standing between you and becoming a millionaire. It's standing between you and changing your whole family tree. You got screwed by SOFI, but you allowed it. You signed up for it. You got screwed by the car company, but you allowed it. You signed up for it. So no more.
Starting point is 01:19:28 I'm not going to, I'm not going to be the person that gets stepped on anymore, and I'm going to punch back so hard that it goes away. When you do all of that, you're, question that you called in with becomes almost irrelevant. That's right. Because 12% on $7,000 is not your problem. That's $700. Yeah. That's $800 for a year. $800 does not fix a $30,000 problem. And you have a car debt, a so-fi debt, and a $1,000 debt that's $30,000. And so you've got, you know, and you don't have an $800 problem. You have a $3,000. You have a $3,000. $30,000 problem, $2,500 a month for one year and you're done. Now, where are you going to get it?
Starting point is 01:20:18 You're going to get it from cutting lifestyle and increase in income and cut in lifestyle and increase in income and you're going to go so hard that your broke friends think you joined a cult. Now, I don't know if you're ready to do that or not. I can't make that decision for you. If I could, I would. Because I know that the 10-year-term from now version of you. would love you.
Starting point is 01:20:39 You're going to, the time is going to pass anyway, and you're going to go, ah, if only I'd listen to that guy on the radio. Oh, and here's the other thing. The faster you get out of debt because of increased income and sacrificed lifestyle, the more likely you do get out of debt. The more you drag it out and slow walk it. Yeah, that's what I said. The better the chance is that you just stay in debt forever, and it just becomes normal.
Starting point is 01:21:03 Well, everybody's gotten screwed by so-fi, so we might as well just be like everybody. else. Yeah, that's right. And your brain starts to get normalize the stupidity that is America today. Yep. And so, and then we've got Gen Z saying, I can't afford to buy a house because Congress screwed them with student loans. Their college screwed them with student loans.
Starting point is 01:21:29 Ford Motor Company, Lexus Motor Company, Toyota Motor Company put them in $1,200 car payments. SoFi put them in 12% personal loans. And we're here to help you with your money. Oh, bull crap. You're here to help you with my money is what you're here to help. We know who you are. And, you know, this is it. And, you know, when you look at Gen Z, they got record credit card debt, record car loans, record student loans.
Starting point is 01:21:59 And then they say, well, I can't afford to buy a house. Well, no kidding. Yeah. Because you got screwed by everybody in sight. And the only thing I would do if I was Gen C's, I'd get really angry about that and I would clean this mess up and take these villains out of my life and say never again see I was 28 when I went broke and American Express called my house and that's my wife why she would stay with a man that wouldn't pay his bills and she called me crying at the office and said I was thinking the same thing
Starting point is 01:22:27 I got so mad that I'm 65 and I'm still mad if American Express calls my house now it's a wrong number because I'm not going anywhere near anything that freaking company does ever they screw people for a living I don't want anything to do with Citibank what's in your wallet money not your crap that's what's in my wallet see you got to get that thing going like that that's swagger and and you know that's what happened with jade and sam yeah said I'm not living like this I've had it Yeah. I'm done. Yeah, you have to get to the point where you're, instead of blaming people, you're just,
Starting point is 01:23:17 you're just mad about it. And you're realizing, oh, the same people that screwed you aren't going to come save you. You know what I'm saying? Like, they're not going to help you. So you have to help yourself. That's the only way. That's the only way you get out of this. It's the only way.
Starting point is 01:23:29 Yeah. When you get twisted up about it and you say, I'm looking around out here and none of these people have my best interest at heart. Nope. And including the balance transfer of zero percent credit card. Well, you know what that is? Just one day for another. They're betting you're not going to pay it off in 20 months.
Starting point is 01:23:45 And you're not going to pay it off in 20 months if you don't change the way you're doing this. And they're just going to send you more offers. Well, no, they're going to jack you to 28%. They're going to make SOFA look like a good deal. Yeah. At the end of 20 months, they're going to hand you a, you know, oh, man, it's going to be bad. They'll hand you a new piece of paper and you're going to go, I think I got a little throw up in my mouth.
Starting point is 01:24:05 Yeah, because I've signed. I did it again. I signed up with one of these companies. Fifth thirds here to help. me a break. They're going to screw you. When you walk into the finance company or the finance office of the car dealer, it should have a sign over the top of it that says, enter here to get screwed because that's what they're going to do. They're going to jack you up. And it's to their benefit, not yours. All you get out of it is toxic smell from the plastic that's new
Starting point is 01:24:37 in the car. And we call it new car smell. It's the plastic that's new and it's toxicity. Let me help you with this. Welcome back to the Ramsey Show in the Fairwinds Credit Union Studio. I'm Dave Ramsey. Jade Walshaw, Ramsey, personality number one bestselling author, is my co-host today. Cassandra is in New York City. Hi, Cassandra.
Starting point is 01:25:23 How are you? Thank you for your incredible gifts and the wisdom you share so generously. Your teachings truly made a difference in my life. Oh, thank you. I joined financial, I joined financial peace university and wiped out $80,000 in debt. Look at you. Wow. Proud of you.
Starting point is 01:25:47 Why'd it go, kiddo? Thank you. Thank you. But now I feel torn between responsibility and boundaries. I have family in a third world country and also families here who are struggling financially. I have been helping, but now it feels expected. and they openly talk about what they want me to pay for. I feel guilty saying no, but I also worry because they do need the money.
Starting point is 01:26:16 How do I help in a healthy way without being taken advantage of or feeling resentful and are becoming their financial plan knowing that I'm supposed to give anyway? And lastly, I don't appreciate that the privacy and the mystery of where the money is coming from is not there, and therefore it doesn't feel like I'm giving money. It feels more like not, it doesn't feel like I'm giving money like a gift, but more like an application. Yeah, that's true. That's what entitlement does.
Starting point is 01:26:50 That's no fun. Okay, so what amounts of money and how much is stateside and how much is in the developing country? Okay, so my family in Haiti, um, In Haiti? They need everything. Yes. Okay.
Starting point is 01:27:08 They need everything. We're talking about... No, how much money have you been giving the people in Haiti? And who is it? Your mother or your dad or what? So my parents live here in the States, and I help them out as well. Okay. They have retired, but they do not have that much money to retire off us.
Starting point is 01:27:28 Okay, that's one. Who's in Haiti? My brother and my sister and my sister. and my siblings. So my brother has five children and a wife, and my sister has two children, and my nephew just had a baby. And, yeah.
Starting point is 01:27:45 What kinds of money? My mother also has a sister up there. In a year's time, how much money are you filtering to these folks? In Haiti. So sometimes I send like $600 to one, $800 to the other. I send $400. So it depends,
Starting point is 01:28:03 because sometimes the kids need to go to school. So I pay for them to go to school. And then I pay for food. I also pay, I mean, I'm also working on helping them to come to the state. So that involves applications. So if you had to put a rough estimate, what's a dollar amount that you would say yearly, I'm spending this amount of money on Haiti? I would say about like $10,000.
Starting point is 01:28:28 $10,000? Okay. And how about your mom and dad? Okay. So my mother, I've been giving her about $400 to $600 a month, but I've been stealing back off of that because I found out that she hasn't been using it appropriately. What's she using it on? So she likes to buy things and she likes to show off to her friends and she has money. Okay, so can we make the statement about everyone involved?
Starting point is 01:29:01 A, we love them and we want good things for them. True? Yes. Okay. B, no matter how much money we give them, it's not going to be enough. Okay. I mean, you could triple what you're giving them, and nothing will change in their lives. And that's why we are working now on getting them to the States.
Starting point is 01:29:32 Yeah. but and that's so that's a good that's a good that's a sustainable investment but just throwing $300 into a family of eight in Haiti doesn't even move the needle you could throw 3,000 in that same hole and it would still go down the hole so you can't give them enough money to be God and you don't have that much money and so it's you know all you're doing is getting aggravated and helping a tiny, tiny bit. But the amount of money you're giving into these situations is not changing their lives. It might feed them for a day. It might help them with their application to come to the States, both of which are good things. But, you know,
Starting point is 01:30:20 so if I'm going to give any more money, I'm going to have two different things on it, three things on it. One is you're going to be responsible with the money that you have, mother. two, we're going to set a set amount, and that's all I'm going to do. Three, I'll help with the applications, okay? But I'm not going to 600, 800, 400, 300, and them think, oh, she's just made of money, and I'm feeling used and guilty, and they're still, and they're still want more. There's no end to it. And so what we've got to do is put a boundary on it, put an amount on it, and say,
Starting point is 01:31:09 I'm going to give you X per month and I'll help with the application. That's it. Don't ask for any more. So should I do that? So now would I now be on the hook? Because now I said. It's up to you. If you don't want it.
Starting point is 01:31:26 The amount of money you can give per month can be zero. But you need to set an amount. And that's for your budgeting purposes. And you need, and for your sanity. Yeah. Because this has, this is like a dog chasing its tail. It's got no end to it. That's what's driving you crazy.
Starting point is 01:31:47 It is, but it's also expected of me. I don't care what's expected. You get to set the expectation. You get to decide what's expected. I'm not expected of anything. Bull crap. You can sit down with them. Let me help you with this.
Starting point is 01:32:01 You get nothing. I decide, I changed my mind. I'm not giving you any more money. You can do that. That's perfectly okay, and you have no reason to feel guilty for that at all. Okay? You know how much money I'm sending your family? None. You know how guilty I am about it? Not at all. Yeah. I'm not, I'm not obligated. I'm not obligated. There's a lot of people hungry. I'm not there. I'm not Jesus. I can't feed all of them. Okay, I feed some hungry people as an act of charity, but not as an act of obligation or guilt.
Starting point is 01:32:33 And we do feed hungry people through the Ramsey Family Foundation. We do that, okay? But we don't feed everybody on the planet. We don't have the money. And I feel zero guilt about that. Okay? So you have got, you've got to put this in your head that you're not Jesus. That job's taken.
Starting point is 01:32:54 He already took the job. You can only do a little bit. You do not have the money to be God. you cannot fix their lives. And once you accept that, then you can explain that to them and say, I can't fix your whole life, but I can do this much a month. And that's what I'm willing to do. And if you don't like it, I can send nothing also.
Starting point is 01:33:22 That's a possibility if you're a jerk about it. If you don't appreciate it and say thank you a lot, I can give you nothing. That's a total possibility. But in the meantime, I'm willing to do this. but you're not the Messiah. The job's taken. When I talk to people on the Ramsey show, 90% of the problems I hear come down to one thing, not having a plan. They're not living on a budget.
Starting point is 01:34:05 They have no idea where their money's going. Money is just happening to them instead of them happening to their money. And guys, that is so normal, but it doesn't have to be normal for you. And that's why I want you to go download our every dollar budget app. Every dollar not only helps you tell your money where to go, with the budget. It also builds a plan to free up extra money so you can pay debt off faster and start building wealth. And the best part, your plan is completely personalized to your life. It's the same advice that you would get if you call the show. And it's right in your pocket. So don't keep living
Starting point is 01:34:41 normal. Go download the every dollar app, answer a few questions, and get your plan today. Today's question of the day is brought to you by Y-R-R-F-I. If you've fallen behind on your private student loans and have stopped making payments, it can feel like every door is closed. But Y-R-R-R-R-E-F-I helps borrowers explore low-fixed rate refinancing options to fit your budget. Go to Y-R-R-E-F-Y. That's the letter Y-R-E-F-Y.com slash Ramsey might not be in all states. Okay, today's question comes from Parker in Tennessee. He says, my wife and I move every few years for work and we rented homes each time. Our friends recently bought a house for $1.5 million, which I know is out of their price range. So I asked how they did it. They said they did an interest-only mortgage. What are your thoughts on this type of loan?
Starting point is 01:35:53 It sounds like it's renting a house, but you get the benefits of ownership. Would buying a house this way be a smart move for somebody that relocates frequently or should we keep renting? So there's two concepts in there. There's the friends who have the $1.5 million house, which that feels like their personal residents. They're not relocating as often as you do. But you're saying, is this a good idea for us since we relocate? And I would say, no, under any auspices of the idea, this is a horrible idea.
Starting point is 01:36:27 And the product is really just what it's, what it is. You're only paying interest. So if you're not paying any of the principal, you're never paying. hang down the mortgage. So in essence, you're just renting a house. That's really what you're doing for a period of time. So there's no real advantage that I can think of for you to do this. I mean, after the interest period ends, your payment's going to jump up anyway because you will start paying principal. And you're just paying more interest over time. It's probably, I got to believe it's one of the most expensive ways that you could buy a house.
Starting point is 01:37:04 Yeah. And actually on the short term, owning a home is more expensive than renting. Heat and air goes out. Sure. Roof leaks. Property taxes go up. Uh-huh. Homeowner's insurance goes up. All of those things, you've still got all those things. And if you move and try to sell the house and you've reduced the principle, not at all, you're likely going to take a loss. Oh, yeah. How you be upside down. Between and how often you move. So no, you need to. stay away from it. So anything that sounds too good to be true is and your friends, Parker, are short-term thinkers. Yeah, it wasn't very smart. They're not thinking long-term. There are people that think, thank God it's Friday. Oh, God, it's Monday. I want something. I want it now, and I'm going
Starting point is 01:37:52 to buy it even though I can't afford it. And by the way, the interesting thing is the difference in a payment on an interest-only loan and a 30-year, which we don't recommend, not much difference. Not a lot of difference. Because think about your 30-year mortgage. The first payment you pay has almost no principal reduction. It's almost all interest. So the payment's almost the same. It's not $50 difference or something like that. It's not a lot different. But the concept is way different because it describes someone who's thinking short term and is immature rather than someone this thinking long term. So the other part of this that I can't help but just call out is if you said, hey,
Starting point is 01:38:33 they bought this house for 1.5. I know it's out of their price range. So I asked how they did it. That that's the wrong question to ask. You don't look at someone who you see me. You ask how they did it so you don't do it. Right. Not so you go, oh, they're buying things they can't afford.
Starting point is 01:38:47 Let me figure out how to do it too. How I can buy things I can't afford. It's not a great method. Really bad. Yeah. That was kind of lay. there and I missed it on the page. Mark's in Washington, D.C.
Starting point is 01:38:59 Hey, Mark, what's up? Hey, how are you guys doing today? Better than I deserve. What's up? So I've got a little bit of a funner question, I think. You helped me out in the past about eight years ago. We were joining a consumer debt, just bought a new house. And since then, we are 100% debt-free.
Starting point is 01:39:18 Good for you. House and everything? Thank you, thank you. House and everything. We got really angry and really focused. Eight years later. knocked it out. Well, I'm glad I was there eight years ago.
Starting point is 01:39:28 That's awesome. That's really cool. Me too, me too. And we're kind of, you know, we've definitely let off the gas some, still focused, still intentional, but still frugal. Good. And I'd like to take my wife to Italy. And I'm curious as to how much would be a responsible amount to spend on about a 10-day
Starting point is 01:39:55 trip to Italy. What's your household income? It's about 200. And what's your net worth now? Right now, it's probably just north of a million. Wow. Okay, good for you. That's a nice eight-year turn. Okay. And how much money do you have saved for the Italy trip? So we're going to go in the fall, so we're going to work towards saving towards it, but I was thinking, like, for the way that we like to travel, again, was very frugal. I was thinking for Italy, probably between like 8 to 10. I would double that. I mean, you've got to price it out and see. I would double that.
Starting point is 01:40:38 Okay. You're a millionaire. You're responsible. You're careful. You make $200,000 a year. Of course, you're paying cash for this. 100%. No question. And $16,000 on a world-class epic adventure is not out of hand for you. Okay. So I'd put 15 on the budget and say, we need to save up 15 between now and the fall,
Starting point is 01:41:04 and then go do it upright. That's 10 days. That's still not a lot of money. You're still not. I mean, you're not staying in the four seasons doing that. Have you priced anything out? Have you looked at it? We've looked at flights.
Starting point is 01:41:20 I've looked at a couple like Airbnbs and things like that that some people have sent me places. that like would kind of fit our style. Okay. And, you know, they, how surprised because they're like, you know, it's kind of like going on a trip in the U.S., like it's not that bad going over there. And I was kind of surprised by that. Okay.
Starting point is 01:41:43 I've heard you've been over there a couple times. Are there any things over there that, like, we should definitely see in your opinion? What part of Italy are you going to? My wife wants to go Sicily to. Okay. Florence, which I told her, hey, I just looked at the map and those are on two options. Yeah, that's right. Listen, I love Florence in that area.
Starting point is 01:42:03 Florence, Pisa. And anything in that area, I think you're going to, you can't go wrong. Great food, too. Yeah, Tuscany is amazing. Yeah. I mean, the food, wine seen in Tuscany is off the chain. Of course, you've got, Florence has got the Statue of David. It's got, and, you know, an hour and a half away is the leaning tower.
Starting point is 01:42:22 And so that's all touchable right there. That's all doable. actually you can get down to Rome. Rome's full of tourist everything. Yeah, it's very from the Coliseum to the Vatican to whatever. And tourist hack, if you're going to spend a little money, if you're going to Rome, if you're going to go into the Vatican and you're going to go into the Sistine Chapel and so forth, and you're going to see the museum, hire a private guide and you don't stand in line for two and a half days to get in.
Starting point is 01:42:53 It's a mile and a half. long and you walk past every bit of it with a private guy and straight in like you're a snotty rich person and just go do it for sure and it's definitely the way to go and you know that's just a couple things but i mean yeah rome's full of uh things you've read about your whole life and thought about your whole life and so it's it's amazing you stay there the whole time probably it just depends on what you want to do i mean and and what it is you're after uh what what type of experiences you're trying to curate in the process. But yeah, you can drop 15K pretty quick over there and still be called frugal.
Starting point is 01:43:30 Absolutely, especially in 10 days. And you did it, Mark. You lived like no one else for eight years. And now you're still young and you can live and give like no one else. And so, yeah, enjoy this. Plan it out. Stay within the plan. and that helps you enjoy it because you're not stressed out about busting the budget or something.
Starting point is 01:43:58 But you're not being quote unquote irresponsible. Not even close. Well done, sir. Listen up, folks. If you've got a complicated tax situation and you're putting off filing your return, it's time to talk with a Ramsey trusted tax pro. Not next week, not April 15th. Right freaking now.
Starting point is 01:45:05 Ramsey trusted tax pros know the tax code front to back so they can do that. the heavy lifting to help you file on time and explain things to you with the heart of a teacher. But they can only do that if you get on their schedule before they book up. Go to ramsysolutions.com slash tax pro to find a full-time tax advisor who serves your area with excellence. That's ramsysolutions.com slash tax pro. Buying or selling your home is a big deal, and with all the clickbait headlines and conflicting data out there. It's hard to know what's really happening in the housing market. Well, we're here to make the latest trends easy to understand and factual. Median home prices
Starting point is 01:46:03 went up a little last month to $403,000. We typically do see that in the spring season because it gets a little busier. Mortgage rates also dipped all the way to 5.43, down from 6.1 that we saw last February, giving buyers some breathing room, but since rates are unpredictable, the best time to buy is when you're financially ready, not when home prices or rates drop. To learn more about the housing market trends and to get some free tools to help you buy or sell with confidence, go to Ramsey Solutions.com slash market or click the link in the show notes if you're listening on podcast or on YouTube. Maria is in Houston. Hi, Maria. How are you? Hi. Thanks so much for taking a call.
Starting point is 01:46:51 I'm calling about my marriage, and my husband and I are not aligned financially. And unfortunately, I knew this before getting married. It's going to be 10 years. We've been married. And I was single mom when we met, my daughter was 12. He helped raise her. She was 19 and got married. but we keep our finances separate.
Starting point is 01:47:16 He's a saver in the past. I've been a spender, and I've worked really hard to get my axi-hander. And he bought the house cash. He bought the house when we were engaged, but he did not put my name on it. And I'm an entrepreneur when I wasn't, whether or not I was earning money, I was responsible for all of the expenses of the house because he bought the house cash. And I'm now in a place that I'm earning money, which feels good. And he's a lot of times I've said, well, you know, now that you sit at the adult table, we can have adult conversations.
Starting point is 01:47:57 Oh. And as long as I keep my eyes a lot and I focus on myself, and I'm okay with it. I'm obviously not okay with it. Every time I bring it up, it causes me a big issue. And so I just pretend like I'm okay with it. And I know my daughter thinks
Starting point is 01:48:23 it's not good for me. And I don't know. I don't know what to do. What made me call you today is that we have a private room house. We have a roommate because that roommate covers property taxes.
Starting point is 01:48:44 You have a roommate living in your home that's paid for? Yes, we do. Why? Yeah, because he, that covered the property taxes. Well, I mean, why can't you guys cover the property taxes? You all aren't broke. Yeah, exactly. And so when he...
Starting point is 01:49:06 Wait a minute. Let's stop him at. What does your husband make a year? My husband retired at 43. and he now has a part-time gig that he does just so he has play money. So what does he plan on living on if he retired at 43? Does he have a huge savings? He does. How much does he have in his investments?
Starting point is 01:49:31 I don't know because I have access. What do you think? I think $5 million. Okay. And what do you make a year? conservatively 100. Okay. It's a condition base.
Starting point is 01:49:47 Okay. Well, so here's the thing. We get in relationships what we tolerate. For 10 years, you've tolerated being treated this way. And you're running out of toleration. You're running out of steam. You're not willing to tolerate it anymore, and that's why you called us. And so I do not know in a radio call or a podcast call how to navigate through 10 years of you being treated like you're not an adult.
Starting point is 01:50:28 And through all the pain that I hear in your voice, I don't think we can navigate through all of that in one phone call. but I will tell you, just listening to you, I think your marriage is probably going to end if you guys don't do something to heal it. Because I don't think you're going to stay much longer if you don't do something to heal it. I don't know that you've said that out loud to yourself, and I'm not suggesting that. I'm just observing that I'm talking to a lady who's completely done. Yeah, if you've had to convince yourself that the only way to survive in there is to basically have a way. basically keep your mouth shut and have a roommate. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:51:14 That's just strange. We have $5 million, but we're so cheap. We have a roommate to pay our property taxes. No, thank you, not how I want to live. So what would I do if I were in your shoes, Maria? I think I would sit down. I would get on the phone and call your pastor, call your church, and get a recommendation of a good faith-based marriage counselor
Starting point is 01:51:37 that can sit down with you and coach you. and coach him. And then I would sit down with your husband and say, I've made an appointment with a marriage counselor on Tuesday because I want to try to save our marriage because it's almost over. And I want to try to save it. Do you want to come? Have you ever tried that?
Starting point is 01:51:57 We have. We've gone to that point. And we started. We'll do a couple sessions and then things get better. He's even put my name on some of the, because our finances aren't blended. He's even put my name on some of the accounts. But my name is still not on the house. And I, yeah, so we've done it like three or four times.
Starting point is 01:52:29 And one time I actually, actually. Well, I mean, are you, do you want to try again? Or are you done? Yes, I don't. No. I don't want to try again unless I think it's going to work. And so I'm going to demand that this time it works. Have you sat with a counselor just you?
Starting point is 01:52:50 Yes. Okay. I think you guys have got that to do. I don't think we can help you on this show, hon. We're not qualified, number one. We're just your friend and we're sitting here with you hurting. And I'm sorry you're hurting. I can't do anything about any of that.
Starting point is 01:53:07 And I don't have a magic phrase to say that hasn't worked in three rounds of marriage counseling. But I will tell you, doing what I do and knowing that the number one cause of divorce is money problems and money fights over money, I will tell you that I'm honestly surprised you've made it as far as you have. Statistically, I'm glad you're still married. And I want you to hear your marriage to heal. But yeah, you guys are, you're going to have to sit down and you guys are going to have to lay out some milestones, some things that we agree that these things are going to happen and these things are never going to happen again. And we've got our little list of five things that we always do and five things that we never do. And, you know, that will include full transparency and understanding where the money is. and I have a vote on the money and you never talk to me like I'm not an adult again and tell me I'll get to sit at the big girl table.
Starting point is 01:54:11 That's so freaking demeaning. It's unbelievable. But you know, but you put up with it for 10 years. So some of this is on you. So you've got to call this. And I recommend you try another round. But I would put very clear expectations in that round of counseling that these things. have to occur or I'm not staying. And if you do stay after that, now it's your fault. I think that's what she's struggling with. Yeah. You keep staying and nothing changes. And now it's your fault. So if you want to make one more pass at it, you can. And I recommend you try it, but with some very clear objectives, I think we kind of went in sideways and said, this just needs to get better as some kind of general statement. Instead of saying, here's specific things that must change, and here's specific things that can never happen anymore.
Starting point is 01:55:10 And those are my conditions. Hey, guys, Dave Ramsey here. Every day on this show, we help people work through real money problems and figure out what to do next. Now, you can get that same kind of help anytime with Ask Ramsey. Ask your money question and get answers built on Ramsey principles. on the show. Whether you're making a decision or just want something explained, Ask Ramsey is here to help. It's fast, simple, and free to use. Go to Ramsey Solutions.com and try Ask Ramsey Today. That's Ramsey Solutions.com. Scripture of the day is Philippians 4-8. Finally,
Starting point is 01:56:29 brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable. If anything is excellent or praise, think about such things. Charles Schultz says life is like a 10-speed bike. Most of us have gears we never use. Interesting. This is true. Faith is in Dayton, Ohio.
Starting point is 01:56:54 Hi, Faith. How are you? Hi, how are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? So I'm a single mom. I'm 30 years old and I kind of just started, you know, kind of paying attention to my finances. so I'm a little late to the game, but I'm on baby step number two, and I'm trying to pay off my debt.
Starting point is 01:57:15 But at the same time, I want to make sure that I'm saving for my son, for his future. So in my budget, I have been putting a little bit aside, but not much. I've just been putting it into a savings account. And I've heard you talk about, like, 529 accounts and different ways to save. I just didn't know if that kind of account is useful for someone who can't put, like, that much, into it every month. Probably not, but I wouldn't be putting anything outside for your son right now. You are investing for your son by getting yourself squared away,
Starting point is 01:57:49 because as you get yourself squared away and out of debt and build wealth, it's going to benefit him. Yeah, I'm just, I'm, my biggest, I'm feeling so much anxiety because I feel like my student loans are so big. How many, how much do you owe on your student loans? I owe $54,000. Yeah, cool. What do you make a year?
Starting point is 01:58:10 I make $58,000. Doing what? I work for a construction. I'm an admin, like, kind of a sister year. But I just got promoted to salary, so I'm making a little bit more. And you're 30 years old and your baby's how old? He's four years old. Cool.
Starting point is 01:58:28 Cool. And where's daddy? He's, I mean, he's in town and stuff, and he does give me some child support. every month. It's like a 400. But I do use a lot of that to like pay for child care and and that kind of thing. That's what it's for. Sure. And you have 50, 58,000 student loans. What other debts do you have? I have 15,000 left on my car. And then I just, I have a personal loan for 5,000 that I used to pay for a little bit for a lawyer and to like clear off a couple of credit.
Starting point is 01:59:07 cards that I had when we were together. Mm-hmm. Have you cut up all the credit cards? Yeah, so the credit cards are gone, and I've been door-dashing every other weekend when I don't have my son, and I've been putting everything I make onto that personal loan right now. Great. Very good.
Starting point is 01:59:24 You're doing the right thing. And anything else you can find in that budget, you throw it on that, too, and get it cleared off. Then you get the car cleared off, and then we go after the student loans. So you're right with... DoorDash and a four-year-old and 30 years old and making 58 with what you owe, it's going to be a little while. You're going to take a while, but it's not going to take 10 years.
Starting point is 01:59:47 It's just not going to happen in two years. Right. But you will be amazed when you knock off the car and the personal loan, how much that frees up your budget to attack this student loan, and then you've probably got another two or three years at that point. Yeah. When you knock out the car, that's going to give you a, a new lease on life. You're going to feel so good having that money back in your pocket every time
Starting point is 02:00:12 you get in that car. And that's going to almost act like a reset for you mentally when you start attacking the student loans. But let's reset for a second on your four-year-old son. Okay. Let me tell you about him. He has a mom who is a warrior princess who knows how to fight and scrape and cause things to happen, that's going to help him more than $10 a month being stuck in a savings account. He's watching you live your life well.
Starting point is 02:00:50 And then as he watches you scrap and claw to get out of debt, he's going to learn to stay out of debt when he's older because he'll remember what we went through. My mom was a single mom and it was tough. And that doesn't kill the kid. it makes him awesome.
Starting point is 02:01:08 So he is really blessed. I don't know why it makes me feel like it makes me feel so guilty that I'm not like, you know, able to save it more for him when he's, you know, 18. Well, the best thing you can do for him is not be a problem later. Yeah, truly. By cleaning this up and becoming a millionaire. And you actually can do that, believe it or not. Let's pretend that it's five hard years from today.
Starting point is 02:01:36 and pull up the calculator. And so 35 to 65, and we save 15% of $65,000. Okay. Five hard years from today, you're debt free and you have an emergency fund. Okay? Student loans and everything. And that's going to be hard. That's like really watching every penny, door dashing, everything you can do.
Starting point is 02:02:03 Hard five years. But you're tough. You can do this. Five years? Yeah. And then at 35 years old, you start investing 15% of your income because you have no payments. How much 15%? 15% of 60,000 would be $9,000 a year.
Starting point is 02:02:21 Okay. Okay. And so that's going to, I did a bit of it, a bit of a bit of a 500 plus two. It's 750 a month. Okay. Okay. And do that from 35 to 65 in a mutual fund. We're going to put it in our calculator right now to see how rich you're going to be,
Starting point is 02:02:38 okay, Faith? That's $2.3 million when you're 65. So if you invest 15% of your income and you make $60,000 a year and you never get a raise for 30 years. Highly unlikely. From age 35 to age 65. And you're able to invest that because you cleared off this debt in the coming five years and you spent five more years of hell. The kid is nine years old when you are debt free and begin investing.
Starting point is 02:03:16 All right. And then when you are at his wedding, you will be a millionaire. Yes. Okay. That's where you're headed. That's where you're headed. And that's the best gift you can give him. He's not going to be harmed.
Starting point is 02:03:35 he's, you know, harmed if you don't put a dime in savings for him today, because by taking care of you, you're setting yourself up to be able to help him in any way you want to later. And by the way, you know, we've been teaching this. I know, Dave, you've been teaching this long enough that we have people who come and their parents did FPU and their parents walk the baby steps and now the children are standing on stage, and the children are part of that legacy. And they never come back and say, oh, it was so hard because my parents walked the baby steps and they paid off debt when I was a kid. My mom never saved anything for me when I was four.
Starting point is 02:04:13 They don't say that. They say, I learned how to handle money from a young age. I never got into debt. And then when I married my spouse, we immediately attacked our house and we became million. My mom taught me how to do hard work. My mom taught me what resilience looks like. because she lived it. These are the gifts you're giving him.
Starting point is 02:04:35 He's going to have a great life because of you. And so quit putting money in savings for him out of some kind of false guilt that you're not taking care of him. My point is you're taking care of him beautifully, but you've got to follow through on all this. It's not going to magically happen. There's no genie in a bottle that does it. It's not going to get easy. It's not going to be where there's no trouble. The transmission's still going to go out and the tire is still going to be low.
Starting point is 02:04:59 the, you know, somebody's still going to steal something from you. It's not going to happen through your life. You can count on all that still occurring. But the point is you've got to have a target and a plan. And when you're working that, you're going to get to a place that you will have taken care of him better by taking care of you than by putting $10 a month aside out of some kind of misdirected guilt. Like you've done something wrong that you should be ashamed of.
Starting point is 02:05:26 You're a single mom with a four-year-old and you're 30. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Now, go get you some, girl. This is your time. It's your time. Go make this happen. And we're going to set you up with everything, all right? We're going to put you into Financial Peace University.
Starting point is 02:05:41 We're going to put you into our every dollar app. And we're going to pay for all of it and give it to you as a gift because we think you're a hero. That puts this hour of the Ramsey Show and the books. We'll be back with you before you know it. In the meantime, remember, there's ultimately only one way to financial. peace and that's to walk daily with the Prince of Peace Christ Jesus.

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