The Ramsey Show - Keep Hustling: You Have Power Over Your Debt

Episode Date: November 14, 2024

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This is the Ramsey Show America. Thrilled to have you with us. This is where we help you win with your money, win in your work, and win in your relationships. The phone number to jump in is triple 8, 825-5225. Triple 8, 825-5225 is the phone number. Alongside the incomparable, the fabulous Jade Warshaw, I am Ken Coleman, and we're here to coach you up today. So we got those money questions,

we got some work-related questions. Hey, I need some more income. I like helping people make mo money. Mo money, mo money, mo money. And by the way, if you're at the Ramsey Show and we help you make mo money, it doesn't come with mo problems. It better not.

Not here. Yeah, we have the good kind of mo money. That's right. So let's get right to it. Josh is gonna start us off in Augusta, Maine. Josh, how can we help today? Um, so I've got a bit of a strange problem here. Perfect. Jade loves strange problems.

I love weird problems. It's perfect. It might not sound so strange once I explain it. Um, I'm, uh, I'm 25 years old. I, uh, I own my own home. I built a construction company. I make about 130,000 a year. And I've got a real proclivity for building my income, building my business, building my personal wealth over time. Great. And one of the things I'm really struggling with, and I'm looking for a non-biased opinion

because you know how friends are, they're great but you know, you can only get so much. I'm looking for any sort of advice on how to select a partner who's not remotely interested in my position in life. When you say, are you talking about business partner or romantic partner? Romantic partner. Got you. Your position in life. I mean, just at 25, I'm doing fairly well.

Tell us what that means. What's your net worth? Hmm, net worth. Like are you saying if I, my business net worth or if I were to liquidate all that? You don't have that much, my friend. If you can't answer that question. Listen, I appreciate where you're at, young man. You said you're 25 and you have a proclivity. Great word, by the way.

Yeah, wonderful vocabulary. I'm a big fan of proclivity. Just used it twice there, because I like the way it sounds. To make a lot of money and all this, because we don't know that, you're 25. I appreciate your confidence, but if the question is, how do I make sure I find a girlfriend

who's not into me for my position in life, I go, well, I don't know that I want to find a woman who's not into me for my position in life? I go, well, I don't know that I wanna find a woman who's not interested in my position because that position in life, the way I'm hearing that is you gotta provide. Position leads to provision, Jay. Come on, okay, Ken, you're right. So I mean, you're not in a place, my friend,

where you're worried about gold diggers unless you're hanging out in the trailer park. Are you dating women that are in poverty situations? I try not to but they pop up. Okay so listen, Joel listen if you are dating, I gotta be very careful how I say this, but I'm gonna answer the question. I got you here to correct me but... Maybe I ought to say it. No let me say it. Okay. If I'm trying to I got it I'm I'm channeling Stacey right now. Okay. Make sure my wife is right beside me and I'm thinking what would Stacey want me to say? Okay because she's a good woman. If a woman who is in poverty pops up into your dating life I don't have a problem with that.

up into your dating life. I don't have a problem with that. People deserve dignity and there's lots of great women and lovely women and lovely men who come from poverty. So I'm not saying cancel it out. However, if a person from poverty pops up in your dating life, as you begin to date them, you should have some discernment there to go, am I a ticket out? Yeah. Or, and so you just have to have some extra judgment and discernment there. I wouldn't cancel them out, but at the same time, I wouldn't necessarily be, you know, hanging out in those areas either.

So I'm trying to walk the fence there. I think it just goes both ways, Ken. I just think this is a problem he doesn't need to be worried about. I don't think it is a problem. I think it goes both ways. The same way you are, all that stuff matters to your point. Your station in life, your work ethic,

what you're accomplishing, that's part of the resume. Yeah. You know, the personal resume. And so the same way that you have built a personal resume that people will learn about as they get to meet you, you will learn about their personal resume as you meet them and learn about them. And you get to decide who gets the position

based off of their personal resume. And so there's nothing wrong with that. You opened up the call talking about this was a strange or weird problem and I don't think it's strange at all. I think it's just part of everyday life when you meet somebody and you get to decide, okay, is this person gonna be somebody that I'm going to be friends with or is this person

going to be somebody that I date long term? Have you had a lady, you said that this has popped up a few times. So have you had someone that has come from extreme poverty that has dated you and you felt like they were only dating you because you were a meal ticket out? Yes, it's happened to me more than once. How do you know? Tell us, be very specific. How did you know? When did you know that she was only after you for your money? It happened a couple of months, about three months then. I noticed at first she was very big on balance. Um, as far as our personal time and psychological investments, you know, we're able to talk and work things and figure stuff out between us as people.

But as time goes on, it turns more into what kind of life you can provide for me and my future children and, and there's no reciprocation besides physical, which to me is, you know, it's got a value, but I'm not sure. I'm not going to lie. I'm not sure I understand. And I want to understand. I agree. You're not being specific enough. There's part of it that I think it is part of the conversation. Maybe, maybe, and I don't know, you were there, I was not there. Maybe she's saying, hey, here's what I'm looking for in life.

These are what I consider gender roles. I would love to be in a relationship where maybe the guy works, maybe I stay at home with the kids. She could just be sharing that that's something that she's looking for. Am I, did I miss it or? I think she's right. Josh, did she say, I want you to buy me this and buy me that.

And I mean, was it very obvious or is this just a young young lady talking about what life might look like? In separate instances, it's been both. Well, you're worried about stuff you shouldn't be worried about on that. Let me put this way, Jade, when you and Sam got serious. You don't want to ask me this question. Yes, I do. What were you thinking? What were you wondering about Sam? My exact words were,

you got to come correct. Those were my exact words, meaning I have a high standard of work ethic and what we both do. Did you ask him about his professional future and what he thought he was gonna do with his life? I didn't have to ask, I could see it. Okay, but my point is you were interested in it. I was interested, I'm like, listen, I'm a go-getter, you're a go-getter, like everything we do, we do 100%. Like that was the standard.

It's like, if you're gonna be around me, you gotta come correct because I'm an intense person. And so that was that on that. All right. So so all right. I'm putting Josh on hold here. I I said what I said. What are you what's your day? I think he needs to be in better pools.

He probably needs to be in better pools. I also think that and I don't say this to be there's no salt or shade on this. I do think that he's viewing himself in a light that's a little bit oh he's puffy oh 100% and so I think that if he just kind of chills a little bit yeah everybody's not after him you're doing well but you've not like you don't have a proclivity to build wealth yet you're 25 yeah can I just say that yes I mean come on man so you're doing well but yeah relax yeah relax use your discernment and get a good group of friends

who can discern on the ladies for you. That always helps. This is The Ramsey Show. We'll be right back. Are you working the baby steps? One of the smartest and most impactful changes you can make is to ditch your cash value life insurance plan if you have one and replace it with a term life policy. Listen, the only thing a cash value policy insurance plan if you have one and replace it with a term life policy. Listen, the only thing a cash value policy is good for is overcharging

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Jade Warshaw is alongside. The early Black Friday sale is here. I what what I didn't even know there was such a thing as an early Black Friday. So what Black Friday is the day after Thanksgiving? Yeah, so this is early. So whether you're shopping for yourself or looking for the perfect gift, Ramsay Slushe's is there for you. We got hardcover books for just $12 audio books are only $8 Money's not a math problem by my colleague right here. I mean, this has got to be the Most joyful energetic book cover I've ever seen money's not a math problem. Look at that. We got the cool green

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Total Money Makeover, the OG of money books is on sale now. Go to ramsysolutions.com slash store to check out all the Christmas deals. If you're listening on YouTube or podcast you can click the link in the show notes for those deals. All right Sarah's up in Phoenix Arizona. Sarah how can we help today? Thank you so much for taking my call. You bet. What's going on? So I am curious on your thoughts on once you've paid off your consumer debt, my husband and I are 40, we've been married 15 years, paid off about $150,000 in student loans when we first got married.

Now we've got three kids and I'm just sort of looking at how our expenses keep growing every year, a combination of kids, inflation and lifestyle creep. And just sort of curious on that balance of, you know, the intensity from where we started our marriage to the intentionality and how you balance that in a way that's honoring the hard work and being mindful of the future. Yeah, I think that's a great question.

So would you consider yourself on baby step five, baby step six, what's the plan? Where are you? Four, five and six, we still have a balance on our mortgage. Okay, and you're still putting aside for kids college? Yes, I'm putting aside for kids college. Yeah, I think there's, you said all the right buzzwords, which is at this point, you're moving from the right buzzwords, which is at this point you're moving from

Intensity to intentionality what you're right and the way that intentionality balances with The idea of I still want to enjoy my life at what point does it become quote unquote lifestyle creep because lifestyle creep kind of has this negative connotation that if I'm Increasing my lifestyle too much, I'm putting myself kind of in a red zone or in a place where I'm not being financially smart, right? And so the way I like to think of it is, first off,

the reason that we do the baby steps is so that, and you get to fill in the blank on what the so that is, so that I can live in a nicer house, so that I can travel more, so that I can go to more of my kids sports games, whatever the so that is Chances are it does cost more because this is a whole money thing, right? and so for me where the barrier lies is as Long as I'm doing all of the things that would cause me to be a financially responsible adult, it's okay for me to increase my income

and therefore increase my lifestyle, right? So for you, you're a baby stepswalker. I kinda like to filter this through just a general kind of five pillars of personal finance. Am I a person who keeps and sticks to a budget monthly? Yes, okay, great, check that box. Am I a person who is out of debt and values never going into debt again

and I'm putting that and have put that into practice? Yes. Am I a person who carries the proper insurances? I've checked all the boxes, I've done all the stuff, I check my coverage yearly, I carry what I need to, okay, I do that check. Am I a person who has valued savings and investing for the future? Whether

that's emergency funds, whether I'm contributing the right amounts to my investing for the future, right? Check that box. And am I a person who prioritizes generosity? If I'm doing those five things, I'm also working on my baby step. Yeah, increase your lifestyle, knock yourself out, have a good time. That's what it's about. It's not about I have to limit myself like this all the time, all the time. Otherwise, what was the purpose? What was the point? Yeah, I agree. The only thing I would add to this, Sarah, is I think there's three questions that even now I'm constantly asking myself because we've got three teens, one's in college,

I got two drivers, I got a third one on the way. I mean, I feel like I'm running a garage service. I've got so many cars at my house. And I think it's three simple little questions. And this is about intentionality, so maybe this will help. Here's three questions. I could do it. I should do it. I must do it.

So it's like, could I do it? Question mark, yes. Should I do it? Oh, I got the mm on the other end of the phone. And then, must I do it? So when I think about things, if it's in the must category, well then we've got some values

that are driving that decision, right? This is the important stuff. If I'm in the, should I do this? Well, we still got values driving that question, but it's not apparent that it is fundamental. It's just okay, do I do this? Like, I'll tell you, I got one of those right now. It's a dry sauna, outdoor dry sauna.

Okay, that's good. Should I? I'm in the should I? Should I do this? And I'm doing my research and I don't wanna go down the rabbit trail and waste everybody's time. Well walk us through it, walk us through it, I like this. Well it's an expensive purchase.

I mean it's not a $500 purchase. That's an expensive purchase. So I'm looking at it going, should we, Stacey and I, should we do this? I've got, I gotta get a car for Josie, who turns 16 in a couple weeks. We're doing the homework on that. And you know, she's not gonna be ready to drive right away,

but she's gonna be close. You start looking through other things. I got a college kid, and we're doing the homework on that, and she's not gonna be ready to drive right away, but she's gonna be close. You start looking through other things. I got a college kid, okay, we're cash flowing a lot of that. So I start walking through, okay, that's a sizable purchase. So I'm going, should I do this? So I start to wait, it's got a lot of health benefits, and I've already gone down that.

It's really good for Stacey and I and our health. It has all of those positive benefits. We've got space for it. I got a space for it, an outdoor space. As you know, you've been over the house. And I go, okay, it's not gonna cramp anything. It's a, I've got the cash for it. It's not gonna hurt me.

And you're still doing all the other things though. And I'm still doing all the other things. So I'm in that place of going, I'm walking through that, even at this stage where I've got the money. It's not, I'm in that place of going, I'm walking through that even at this stage where I've got the money. It's not, I'm not gonna feel it, but I do feel it. I still go, that's a sizable purchase. And do we do it now?

So then Stacey and I change our Christmas plans for each other and go, this is what we're gonna do. I mean, all I'm saying is I'm using a super simple thing that I like to walk through. Could I do it? Yes. Could I do it? Yes. Should I do it? Well, we gotta wrestle with that.

And then the must I do it. And I think maybe that'll help Sarah with staying in view of your values so that you know if your values are right, your money's gonna be right. Yeah. And the truth is your values change and get to change throughout this process.

Something that would not have been important to you maybe three baby steps ago could become important to you now, and that's also okay. So just a little permission to- Let's say you and Sam call us up and go, hey, let's go on this trip. I'm going right to should I? Oh, okay, yeah.

Because we have margin in our life. That's right, that's right. The could is there. But there are times in life where it's going, hey, I know, could. Yeah. No. Private jet. No. Yeah. Could I? No. The answer is no. So, you know, Sarah, I hope that helps you. I think you need to give yourself permission. I know Jay did a wonderful job of setting it up, but I hope those little questions. That just keeps you, I think you're worried about you're doing something dumb. And I just don't see that if you've got values aligned with how you spend your money.

Thank you, I appreciate it. Yeah, good, good, good. I mean, that's, and we see this a lot, Jade. I want you to share with our audience that's on the front end of this. Okay. Of why we got that phone call there, because there are a lot of people

who are just in baby step one, or they're in baby step two, and they're just like rice and beans, beans and rice, it's gazelle. Well now, Sarah's on the other side of that, and still dealing with some of that, I'm gonna call it leftover intensity. Yeah, you put the rubber band on tight

when you're on baby step one. It's like, oh my gosh, it's like you're squeezing into a tight pair of jeans. I like that. If you put a rubber band on your wrist, it'll leave a mark. It'll leave a mark. You gotta let some time for that skin to heal. Yeah. That's interesting. And it's like okay have you ever this is a horror I'm not gonna use this analogy I was gonna say it's a

horrible analogy but you're like in the tight jeans and then you get in baby step four you know when no one's looking you can let the zipper down a little bit and you can just listen. I think every man in America identifies with being in the jeans and you went to the buffet, one too many trips. Man, okay. And you get underneath the table and no one's looking, you just. Just a little air. Just a little out.

Just a little breathing room. That top button, just so we go back and get a little more stuffing and gravy. A little bit more. You know what my theme is during Thanksgiving and Christmas, folks? This is bonus, Eat through the pain. You want to know what mine is? What? If it's brown, it's going down.

There it is folks. That's why you come to the Ramsey Show. We'll be right back. Hey guys, I've never done this before, but I'm partnering with a nutrition company, Field of Greens. Each fruit and vegetable in Field of Greens is selected by doctors to support heart, liver, and kidney health, plus metabolism for healthy weight. And your doctor will notice your improved health or Field of Greens will give you your money back. I can get behind a promise like that. Go to fieldofgreens.com slash Ramsey and get 15% off with promo code RAMSY. Fieldofgreens.com slash Ramsey. Alongside Jade Warshaw, I'm Ken Coleman,

and you have joined the conversation about you and your life here on The Ramsey Show. 888-825-5225 is the phone number. We're here to coach you up today. Sharon is up next in Cleveland, Ohio. Sharon, how can we help? Hi, thank you guys for taking my call. So I'm in a bad situation that I can't really get out from under. I'm about $350,000 in debt. Mainly I really have car payments. I don't have the option to get a loan or anything,

so I'm considering a voluntary repo or bankruptcy. Oh my gosh. Okay, I wanna make sure I heard you right. Did you say 350,000? Yes, that does include a house. Okay, how much of that is the house? The house is 153. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Here's the thing. I wanna know more about this car cause I'm never gonna tell you that bankruptcy is the way out of this and I'm never gonna tell you that voluntary repossession is the way out of this. So let's get our head around the numbers

and let's see if we can offer you some better solutions. I can't guarantee they won't be painful but I think that they'll be better than what you're talking about. So tell us about the car. So there's two cars. One was for my son, who obviously that didn't work out. So first car payment is 992. I owe about 49 and it's only worth about 23. Okay, why is- I have a car 780. Tell me, wait, before you go on, you said you owe 49 and it's worth what now?

23. 23. And what happened that caused that steep depreciation? Is it a lot of miles? What's the year? It's a 2023 Hyundai Santa Cruz. Interest rate is about 9%. And you've been paying minimum payments.

Have you, let me, where are you getting the value of it? Let me start there. Are you going on Kelly blue book or did some dealer tell you this? This was from Edmonds and some offers from like the CarMax. They gave me around 23. What would cause this to drop 50% in two years? Less than two years. You said 2022. The car is actually at 2023. I have absolutely no idea. Okay, so Edmonds

is private seller. Is that what you looked up there like Kelly Blue Book or Edmonds? Did you look at private sale? You selling it to somebody else? I believe that value was private. Well, maybe not private sale. Is it electric? You have it listed too. Is it an electric vehicle? How many miles you got? It's not. About 18,000. Something's not right. No, I just think your numbers are off. Here's what we want you to do so that Jade can keep coaching here. You need to go look Kelly Blue Book, be as accurate as you can on it, and you're looking at private seller value. The number seems really low and that matches up to what a CarMax or another car dealership, they're going to give you way less for the car because they got to build some profit into it.

Did you roll a lot of other negative equity into it when you got it? I didn't have a negative equity. All right. Now we got some. How much did you roll in? I'm just trying to understand. Do you remember? Honestly, I don't know. I purchased these two cars the same day and they did some fancy stuff.

OK. Fancy. All right. Yes. Okay, so tell me about car number two that your son has and by the way how old is your son? He is 18. He no longer has possession of the car anymore. So who does? It's $782. My sister who is helping with the payment. Alright $782 car payment. What's the loan on it? $30K. And what's it worth? This one is, it told me around $12K, but there's damage to it. So I wouldn't think it would be too much higher.

So I wouldn't think it would be too much higher. Okay. Is it the type of damage that is it running? Like is it, is it working? It does run. It does work. There are a few mechanical things, but it's mostly just body damage. It was side swiped. Okay.

All right. But it's your name on it, even though your sister is operating it and paying the loan. It's your name on it. He's only paying a little bit towards it, but yes, it is undermining. Okay. So and tell me you said before, like, there's no way I can get a loan. There's no way I can get out of this, because I would rather you owe another lender 18,000 then owe 30,000 and I would rather you owe another lender 26,000 then owe 49,000. Do you see what I'm saying? So it's about- Highly, highly understand. My credit has tanked. There's been a series of

unfortunate things that took place so I don't actually have the ability to even get along at this point. Okay. So then in that case, tell us about some of the other debts that you have and then tell us about your income. So the house is 150K. It's a duplex. I bought it for the sole purpose of having someone help me pay my mortgage.

So I do have a tenant. I have 80,000 in student loans. They're on the deferment. Okay. It wasn't 80,000 obviously when I graduated. Sure. But they're not, nothing's due on those right now, right? You're paying almost zero. Correct. You should be. Okay.

Correct. What else? About 8,000 in credit cards, 18 in personal loans, another 10 to 12 in medical. I recently started working with a nonprofit debt management company and they're handling that but that's also a very high payment. Yeah. I wish you hadn't done that. Okay.

So the credit cards, personal loans, medical debt, is there anything else? No. Okay. So tell me about your working situation. Tell us about your income. I make about $75 to $86 with bonuses at my job. I work more than full time. When you say $75 to $86, are you telling me $75 to to 86 per year or are you telling me 7,500 per month, 8,600 per month?

Tell me, give me your monthly. Okay, give me your monthlies. Monthly at about, do you want take home or gross? Take home. Take home is 52, 56. Okay, so here's what the only, there's only a couple of ways to remedy this. The first is you get your income up.

There's no other way around this. And then the second thing is time. Okay, so you getting your income up, I mean, you have a great income now, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that you're like behind the curve or anything like that, but you've got a lot of debt here. And the whole thing with the car situation, I mean, I'm going to look for anything almost is better than what you've got yourself in now, truly.

Anything to lower this number so that you can find some breathing room because paying 992 for one and 782 for another, any way that you can knock that down so you can find some breathing room because paying 992 for one and 782 for another, any way that you can knock that down so you can find some breathing room and get further into this, I'm doing it. You know, I'm looking at whatever I can to get a loan for the difference on these cars to get out of them, especially the second one, because you're not even,

you don't even need that car, right? Your son is almost grown now basically, and he's not driving it anyway. So you gotta get out of that 18,000, find any way to get that that you can come up with. The duplex, what's it worth? I think the last time I checked it was like 205. Okay, so there's not much there.

Okay, not much there. Yeah you're gonna have to, Ken I mean there's no superpower on this. Well I think, I know you've you don't have time to tell us we're running short on time. One of the things I want to do is I want to get her, I want to get her a session with a financial coach because there's so much complexity here so hang on the line and I'm gonna have Christian connect you there. But what you're gonna have to do is you can't assume anything. You go, oh, this happened, this happened, this happened.

I can't get a loan. I would be going to every credit union that you can locally. I go, here's my situation. I've got a good paying job. I've gotta lower my expenses. And to Jade's point, you've sell these cars. And if you can consolidate that loan through them and get those payments lower number one that's a raise.

Yeah but real talk though I mean with her income unless she's investing or doing something else after the car payments I don't know what percentage her mortgage is but her student loans aren't due at all and so that's still there's still $3,500 left so So if you're not on a budget, you got to get on one. But when I look at the $10,000 in medical debt, which you should be settling the 15,000 in personal loans and the 8,000 in credit cards, there is money here to pay these debts. There's something here that we don't know about. Challenge yourself. What do you have to do right now to make an additional 30,000 a year that goes to this

mess and you can get out of this? Hang on the line. We're going to get you a session with one of our coaches and that'll help you a little bit more. This is the Ramsey Show. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. This month is all about gratitude and most of us have people in our lives that we're grateful for.

One of those people for me is the wonderful Marilyn Fannin. She gave me a chance, she taught me poise and professionalism, and she challenged me. But there's one person that we often don't take time to thank. Ourselves. We don't always acknowledge that we're barely surviving or that we're moving forward or that we're working towards a better life and better relationships. And in a world where everything seems to have gone bonkers, it's not always easy to be grateful. So here's my

reminder to thank the people in your life, including you. And sometimes to do that, we need some professional help. We need to talk to someone trained to help us discover true gratitude for ourselves and others, especially in the holiday season. That's why I recommend BetterHelp. Better Help is 100% online therapy, and you can talk with your therapist at just about anywhere so it's convenient for your schedule. You just fill out a short online survey to get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapists at any time for no extra cost. This season, let the gratitude flow with BetterHelp.

Visit BetterHelp.com slash Deloney to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Deloney. Welcome back to the Ramsey Show America. Thrilled that you have joined us. I'm Ken Coleman and I'm alongside my friend, Jade Warshaw. So, so good to have you. 888-255-225 is the phone number to jump in. But before we get back to the phones, we've got today's question of the day, which is always brought to you by our friends at WhyRefi. WhyRefi refinances defaulted private student loans.

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Yeah. Today's question comes from Dylan in Montana. He says, I fully subscribe to Dave's philosophy on personal finance, but here's an issue I don't recall being addressed. What are your thoughts on 0% financing for cars? We've never addressed that one in all the years. Well, that's not readily available now. My hope is that it will return at some point, perhaps with some manufacturers

extending the term for 60 months. I realize this is debt, but it's cost free debt, right? Oh, boy. So you handle that one, Jade. If you're well, hey, let me just call out the obvious. If you fully subscribe to Dave's philosophy, then this would not even be on your radar. So there's holes in that, that argument. But anyway, yeah, at the end of the day, we're talking about risk. That's really all this boils down to. Let's say the car that you want is $32,000,

and you say, okay, I can get it on a typical term. I think right now, the average loan term is 69 months, which is ridiculous to be paying six years for something. Really? Yeah. 69 months? Yeah. ridiculous to be paying six years for something. Really? Yeah. 69 months? Yeah. That's a thing?

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. The stats right now are the average new car loan is $31,722 with a monthly payment of $545 on an average loan term of 69 months. Oh yeah. This is where I need Tums. Yeah.

I need to just like open the bottle and chuck a couple Tums right down, right down here. Yeah, so this guy's like, this guy's like, well, what if I want the same car and I get 0% over the same term or okay, a little bit less, so five years. It's free money, right? It's free money, but I'm like, okay, think about all that can happen in five years. And so we're, again, it's really back to the risk situation of, okay, why carry debt, A, when you don't have to, and why carry debt? Because when life hits, as it will, you're on the hook for that. So if something were to change with your lifestyle,

you still have to make the payment. And so for me, even though you're not paying for something at a premium, in this case, APR interest rate, you're still carrying debt around your head debt around your head and around your neck that you don't need to have. And so for that reason, I'm out. Yeah. Well, speaking of crazy terms, I cannot believe what I have in front of me. Folks, this is real. This is an actual article I'm holding in my hands. Now, what is it?

This is the dumbest person in America. I'm gonna... That's the title. Um... This is a headline from Finance, Yahoo. Yahoo Finance. Apparently, this gentleman made a $1,000 down payment to Joe the car plug.

Sounds reputable to me. Oh my gosh. That's the dealer's name. Joe the car. Oh wow. Joe the car plug. Okay. You're going to begin to see how this thing unravels quickly.

And the deal he agreed to was Jade and this is not a typo. I'm assured by Kelly the producer. This is not a typo. Five hundred ninety dollars per month. Wait for it folks. For 27 years. What? Which means he will ultimately pay $191,000 for a BMW 530i. Now a brand new one according to BMW's website is it's got an MSRP of $58,000 and it gets worse folks. Oh my gosh. Not only is this moron agreed to pay $590 for 27 years. Oh my gosh. The car already has 289,000 miles on it.

Joe, our board op, about fell out of his chair. It's not a typo. So, we actually have real evidence of this. This is not just an article. We also have a TikTok apparently about this story. Let's roll this and then we'll react to it a little bit more Mr. David just saw this all for this BMW 530. Mr. David. How much did you put down? How much is a month 590 alright, how many months we're 20? Oh I am speechless. We're celebrating this. I am without speech. He's happy as he could possibly be about this decision. I mean, the facts are the facts. He's thrilled that he only put $1,000 down.

Now that BMW at 289,000 miles has a lifespan of about seven weeks, I think. Am I right? There's nothing about this that makes sense and there's nothing about this that, there's no logic here. Yeah, but he's as happy as he can be. Did you see the smile on his face? Joe the Car Plug did me a favor.

They should arrest the guy who owns Joe the Car Plug. Isn't there some kind of laws against this? Yeah, you know, I can't resist because I'm an opportunity cost person and so I can't resist running numbers on something like this. Okay, take it away. Because we look at this and go,

oh, David with interest, he's ultimately gonna pay 191,000, which that alone is shocking. Like that's a lot of money. But that's not even the, that doesn't even scratch the surface of the true opportunity cost here. So 27 years, I mean, we say it on the show all the time,

the car payment is what keeps middle-class broke or the car payment truly is what keeps whoever wants a car payment broke, right? So, because you're locked in. And when you lock yourself into a five, six year term, in this case, 27 years, that is a term of time that you're saying, with this money, I will pay my car. No, I will not invest it.

I will not do other things. And so that is the opportunity cost that we play here. But this doesn't even, can I just say this doesn't even make sense because I'm in the used car game because I got three teenagers. I've bought, as you know, two cars in the last three years. Yes.

Joe, you're a gear head. I know for a fact that a BMW with 289,000 miles on it, it could be a 2023. Yeah. The most you could probably charge for that is 15,000. That's the most I'm making. That's if it's a 2023. If that's two or three years old,

that car's not even worth 10 grand at that kind of mileage on BMWs. So I really think, I was making a joke, but I think this is illegal. Well, like this is how do you charge this man $590 a month for 27 years? This man is paying rent for Joe, the car plug. Well, that's what he's doing. He's paying the man's lease. He's playing the man's lease. I have to believe and I don't know. I don't know how vetted this is because anything's possible on the internet. And so they might, who knows?

They might have said this for years. I'm starting to wonder if this is, because anything's possible on the internet. And so they might, who knows? They might have said this for years. This can't be real guys. I'm starting to wonder if this is even real. They did it for the gram. I believe that. But just know that if he had taken that same money and invested it over the same term, it's almost a million dollars.

Literally almost, it's $970,000 that it really is costing him to operate this vehicle if this in fact is. This can't be real. The more I think about this, let's round it up to 600 a month, it's $7,200 a year. The car itself, I know this is real. I just don't think a person could be that clueless.

I'm told that this is real, this is a real article, that cannot be real. Are you with me, studio audience? That's absurd, that is fraudulent. He's being defrauded. That's not a word, is audience? That's absurd. That is fraudulent. Yeah. He's being defrauded. That's not a word, is it? He's being defrauded, but he also is playing a role in this.

Because... Yeah, I don't mind saying he's not a smart guy. Nobody twisted his arm. It doesn't look like to get this. Oh man, I don't know what to do. This is a sign of the apocalypse. It's what this is. This is a sign of the apocalypse. It's what this is. This is a sign of the apocalypse. This is a real news article from a reputable thing and here's a TikTok with this guy

with a smile on his face like he just won the lottery. In the music, I got five on it. That was messed up. Why? I didn't even pick up on that. I was listening to the music. I was like, this Why? I didn't even pick up on that. That's fantastic. I was listening to the music.

I was like, this is a bothersome one. And he left. I just, the idea, like I literally was just from the question of the day. I was processing, cause I don't pay attention to this stuff anymore. I was having a hard time processing a 69 month term on a car.

Wild. Yeah. That's what people are doing. And that means rooms to go must have a 10 year plan now. But here's the thing, delinquencies are up. They've always got something. They're always the leaders and oh yeah, no interest for 99 years. I'm watching college football and it's like you can get a sofa today and finance it to the year 3000. It's like what? Will I be here? Oh gosh. Oh god. Rescue us folks. Yeah, we need help.

All right, more of your calls coming up. This is the Ramsey Show. Do you ever feel like you're finally making progress towards your goals only to get quickly distracted by something else in your feed? Well, that's why we created the Ramsey Network app, your single source for content that keeps you motivated. The Ramsey Network app is designed to keep you laser focused on reaching your goals.

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This is where we coach you to win in your life, win with your money, win in your work, and win with your relationships. Alongside my good friend, the incomparable, fabulous, fantastic Jade Warshaw. I'm Ken Coleman and I've got my fall sweater on. That's what I got for you today. This is nice. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you very much. Appreciate that. I just saw it in the camera. I realized, oh, you know, it's kind of cool here in middle Tennessee now. Sweater weather is what I

like to call it. Sweater weather. John's going to get us started first in Houston, Texas. John, how can we help today? Hello, thank you for taking my call. I got myself into a situation. I signed a lease for an apartment about three months ago, and I kind of think I've bit off more than I could chew. Everything was going good at first, but unfortunately the brakes went out to my car and I kind of think I've bit off more than I could chew. Everything was going good at first, but unfortunately the brakes went out to my car.

And I kind of fell behind on rent. And so I am contemplating whether I should break the lease and get a roommate to get my finances under control, or what would be the next best option. All right, well give Jade a picture of your finances. How much do you bring home and how much is this lease and what other debt do you have?

Give us a bit of a picture. Okay, so what I bring in every year, so this is gross, it'd be $43K. Tell me monthly, tell me monthly. Yeah. $2,000. Okay, so $2 year 2000 a month Correct and Clarification is that take home

2000 is take home. Okay. Gotcha. All right keep going Okay, and the lease is 899 a month There's you know various other charges like water sewage all that stuff so comes up to like 980 under grand I've kind of looked at it kind of like what the termination cost would be for this contract and they talked about a re letting fee which is 80% of the 899 and then 899 for the rest of the the lease which comes out to like seven eight grand. What, how are you getting that? I thought it was 899 for the lease

plus the half of the lease. So like 450. Did I, what am I missing? She said 85% of the relating fee and then the rest of the remainder. When I calculated it came out to a grand because this is what I think a 12 month lease. Oh, for the entire thing. got you I got you. Yeah.

Okay so yeah that's not an option because you don't have that money. Definitely. Okay. So yeah. So this is a symptom of a much much larger problem. My first question when you first started talking was I wanted to know how far behind how many months behind are you? Well, that's the thing. It's just only actually It's only like two or three weeks, but okay This happened in October when the brakes went out. I was late. They say on the contract. You can't be late I talked to him but know about my situation. They said okay, we'll take that payment Late and I said November is gonna be late as well.

Now, you know, this has messed up my paycheck and paycheck right now. So they said, we'll take November's as well. But now they're saying, okay, December the 1st, you have to be on time. You're not, we're gonna go ahead and file for an eviction. What do you do for a job? I actually work in mental health.

Unfortunately, it doesn't pay a whole lot. What do you do in mental health? I, it doesn't pay a whole lot. What do you do in mental health? I work with people who have chemical dependency issues. Okay, and so are you an hourly wage? Yes. What is your hourly wage? Well, right now it's about $20.70-something an hour. Yeah, I'm jumping in very quickly

because Jade can help you and walk you through this, but you have an income problem in addition to the fact that we know you've signed it. You know, you've already admitted it. You signed up for a lease you couldn't afford. But you can dig out of this and Jade will walk you through the rest of it, debt, whatever, but I'm going to tell you that right now you can happen to this problem and right now you're a good man who loves taking care of people and you're just not making a whole lot of money but you got yourself way over your head and so until you get yourself out of this you're going to have

to work like an absolute madman and you're an able body. So that may mean swallowing your pride and working the graveyard shift at Walmart stocking shelves getting 20 an hour somewhere else. You have got to bring in some income to get current and get yourself some breathing room here. But this is going to be hard for a little while. I'll hand you to Jade on that, but I wanted to at least make the point that you can work and you should be working.

And I mean every second of the day at this point to get yourself out of this. Well John how long have you been working how long have you been in the career that you're in right now? I actually entered it earlier this year. Earlier this year and before you entered this career were you doing something that earned you more money or less money? No I made a little far less and actually the last four years I was actually in training. Okay. My internship.

Where I'm struggling with this is I think that you know, how old are you? I'm 30. I'm 30. Okay. I think that you know that $2,000 a month, it's impossible, right? I think that you know that. And what kind of shook me on this is you're like, okay, back in October, my breaks went out.

I'm struggling with, man, if that happens, then it's like, okay, I gotta go tonight. I gotta get to Wendy's tonight and get a job. I gotta go over to Dollar General tonight. There's this urgency that I feel like is missing. And then when I'm like, well, how long have you been doing this job? Then I realize, oh, this urgency has I feel like is missing. And then when I'm like, well, how long have you been doing this job? Then I realized, oh, this urgency has been missing

for a while. And then when you told me that you're earning less before that, there's something missing here. And you've got to have a, when the house is on fire, you don't just lollygag around and be like, oh, you know what, I think I left a pair of socks upstairs. You know what, I think I need to go over here and get these keys off this dress.

You run, you move with a sense of urgency to get to safety. And I think that you gotta start moving with that sense of urgency because this house has been on fire for a little minute now. One quick question on that urgency issue, Jade. Is this a two bedroom apartment?

No, this is just a one bedroom. Man. All right. I was gonna try to get you a roommate real quick, but that's not an option. No, I think right now we gotta go to work today. That's it. I mean, you're literally selling stuff,

anything you own, right now income, income, income. You're selling your bed. You're selling everything that you have that there's a value on it. You're selling your bed, you're selling everything that you have that there's a value on it. You're selling your bed, you're getting a couple hundred bucks and you're buying an air mattress for 30 bucks at Walmart and taking the rest and putting it towards this.

Cause you gotta hit this December 1st deadline to kind of get everything right side up again for you. And don't let that trick you into thinking, okay, I'm okay now, now I'm safe. No, that was just you getting from upstairs to downstairs. The house is still on fire. So that, I mean, that's what you've gotta do. $2,000 is not going to make it work.

And I understand if you love your career, but then you gotta be proactive about adding additional income to it every single month and a lot of it. Yeah, I mean, for advice for other people that may be in John's shoes here, If you want to get into the mental health space and we'll see what a ladder looks like for him going forward. But at that point, Jay, this is why we teach percentages of your income that go to housing to give you this kind of, to give you this

safety net from getting, you know, overextended because he should have been renting a little place over some old lady's garage. Max, 500 bucks, max. I was thinking 400. Cause that gets him at about 25%. No one wants to hear that, but what's the alternative? You go out and get an apartment going, well, I got a job, I'm doing the thing I wanna do,

I'm an adult now. And then you go, oh, I actually can't't afford it if anything bad happens in my life oh like the brakes going out mm-hmm I mean this is bad this Michael Jackson so man tough stuff oh folks listen to what we teach keeps you from doing this stuff this is the Ramsey show We'll be right back. If you're like most people, your financial and personal documents are scattered all over, making it hard to find a specific account number or password when you need it, and even harder for our loved ones when we pass away. One key to having a healthy financial life is being able to access your information and KnockBox makes that simple.

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Folks, the Ramsey Christmas Cash Giveaway is here and you could win big. We're giving away $500 prizes each week and one grand prize of $5,000. Enter daily for your chance to win at RamseySolutions.com slash Giveaway. It's that easy. Plus, our 50 days of Christmas deals is on right now. Get up to 30% off bestsellers and life-changing gifts that won't break the holiday budget. Ramsesolutions.com slash store. Welcome back to The Ramsey Show America. So glad you're with us.'m ken colma jade warshaw is alongside triple eight eight two five five two two five is the phone number triple eight eight two five five two two five we go next to san jose california jeff is there jeff how can we

help uh... yeah me and my fiance were or in about a million dollars in debt right now. And we kinda, most of it student loan debt, but we still have a million dollars. We just don't know how to really tackle it. Oh my goodness. Is this, what type of degrees did you guys have?

Yeah. We're both dentists, so I guess that's a good thing, kinda. Yeah. Yeah, I can tell you're fired up by that. Bless your heart. Yes. Are you making money? Like what are you guys making every year? So, what we're told when we go into this is we'll be able to pay it off, don't worry. That's right. We make about,

probably average 170 a year. That's what you guys are actually paying yourself? Yes, before taxes. Before taxes, about 170. Oh my gosh, 170 gross. And are you separate practices? We are currently, but we're probably gonna group in together and just try to grow, I guess. Did you say 170 each or combined?

Each. Okay, okay. 170 gross each. That's not bad. And you're living in, okay, well San Jose is expensive. That's an expensive part of the country. What is your debt? Break it down for Jay. Let's go you first. You're the one on the phone and you're not married yet. So what's your debt? About, let's see, $450,000 right now in all student loan. Okay, and no other debt? Luckily, we're both pretty good on that side. Okay, pretty good or good?

Good. How long have you been practicing? About a year now. We just came out of school. It's just kind of a nervous thing to be a million dollars in debt just so soon. No, no, listen brother, this is real. And I, oh, this makes me so mad on your behalf. Not mad at you, but people are just selling this and now you're facing it.

It's like staring down the barrel of a gun right now as I can feel it all over you. And well, here's the thing I'm asking about. You're only a year into this. Based on, I don't know if they teach you any business skills, probably not, but do you have any- Unfortunately, they don't. They don't.

Any sense of how big your practice is in its first year? Are you small for first year? Are you medium-sized? Do you have any sense of that? I would say we're probably small getting to medium hopefully by the end of this bill. Do you know any dentists at all that are very successful? Yes, I do. Are you in contact with them on a regular basis to go, how did you grow your business?

No. You need to be. I'm not. You need to be. I'm not kidding you. Jay's gonna give you some financial advice, but I was leading you this because let me tell you something. They don't teach you how to run a business,

they teach you how to take care of teeth. But taking care of teeth is not enough to be a successful dentist. You have got to know how to get people in the chair. Yeah, that's right. And I want you on the phone, I'm going to give you as a gift of mine, Christian, at the end of this call, I want to give him the proximity principle. It's worth a quick read. You can get the audiobook if you want that.

We'll give you whatever version you want. But I want you to be in touch with successful dentists, and I mean successful, and I want you telling them, I need your best advice. What would you say to me where I'm at right now about growing my business? And try to replicate this with two or three other successful dentists. Get all that feedback in one bucket and start doing it. Because the quicker you grow this business, the more you can pay yourself. And the more you pay yourself, the easier it is to do what Jade's gonna tell you. I just wanted to give you that.

You've gotta be like, and she's gotta be the same way. If you guys combine practices, this can't be like, wee, we're married and we have to know. You both are like, you're the most I don't want to say desperate dentist we've ever seen but it's like you got to get creative in the community and be competitive so that everybody's coming you to get the teeth cleaned okay can I ask a question and this is both to Ken and you Jeff so you you come out of dental school you've got all the goods to be able to practice Are you working for someone else or you started your own thing?

I'm working for someone else, but we're working on a contract to hopefully Partner and is that gonna cause you to have to go into more debt? Cuz that's what I'm trying to get a sense of what your next plan is because I don't want you to go into more dead And that's why we're trying to hold off, because we don't know if it's worth getting more debt. No, no. You can't. No, you got to do your own practice, man.

I thought that's what we were talking about. You can't go into debt. It's not worth it. No, like you got to work for someone else until you can afford to do whatever the next step is. Is your income fixed, though, after all that big speech step is. Is your income fixed though, after all that big speech I gave, is your income fixed or are you able

to go recruit new patients and get some of that? No, not fixed. So you can benefit from hustling like I told you to do. Yes. All right, okay, that's good news. That's all I was trying to get at. And I don't want you to go into any more debt until this is cleaned up.

Because again, what you're realizing now is true. Yes, you have agency over this, but there's no guarantees and there's no guarantees at how quickly this will go. And so going into further debt, I would not advise that. Looking at the numbers, the hard part for me is you are in an expensive area. What are you paying? Like what's the housing situation? Are you renting?

Do you own a place? What is it? We're gonna we're gonna be owners because it doesn't it almost doesn't make sense to rent because then we're just throwing that away from the map. What are you doing right now? What's the situation now? About 4500 a month. For your place? Or are you guys together already? Together?

You're already together. It'll be $4,500 yet. Okay. To rent but to buy it's the same. Yes, but you're going into debt to get it. You're adding more debt to your name. We will be. Yes. And you're tied to that. Like you gotta pay it and now you're adding expenses to your life as well. You can't afford to do that. You need to be living as cheaply as possible and if it's the same price per month,

it's not really the same price because your complex or whatever is paying for yard and garbage and all those things. So I don't wanna add weight to you of having to replace an AC or having to replace a roof or having to, do you see what I'm saying? Yeah, okay. So that's, or adding insurance, you know,

all that stuff is really expensive. And so I would continue to rent, you're not throwing money down the drain, you are buying yourself time until you can truly afford to buy. So please promise me your homework coming off this call is to promise me that you won't go into debt into this practice right now,

and that you will not buy a home right now because that would add insult to injury. And I'm gonna throw in here, I'm gonna challenge you to get a much, much better rent situation. Just try. Find a place over an old lady's garage. I say that all the time, but I'm telling you,

I don't think you guys should be paying anywhere near 4,500 a month. Not now, you guys are so broke. You almost need to be staying in a place where they're paying you. Jeff, you're going to have to fight, Jeff, you're going to have to fight hard because the truth is you guys have got these shiny degrees.

You're in a great profession where there's the potential to make a lot of money. And the people around you, probably the people that you're working with, they're coming in with their Tahos and their Cadillacs and their Teslas, and they get expensive salads and juices for lunch, you don't do that. You eat lean cuisine and you drive a Ford Taurus.

And I would prescribe a lot of fasting for this couple. It's the new craze, it's a biblical principle and I think it's got some financial advantages here. Y'all need to try fasting three days at a time. You're gonna look great, but you can't even afford to buy cold cuts. Yeah. Carl Budding, do you remember Carl?

I don't know, listen Jeff, I don't know if you remember when I was coming up, the cheapest cold cuts you could buy were colored. We're older than these youngsters. But in all seriousness, Jeff, listen, you have got to reduce your living expenses right now That's one of the biggest raises that you could give yourself So I'd be as soon as this rental term is up or whatever's going on

I would be looking to slash those costs. I mean big time Okay, if I even if I got a driveaways at this point, I'd rather pay gas You know y'all ride together It's called public transportation. Everything's on the table now, right, Jay? Everything. You get you a bus pass, it's on and popping. It's the truth, man.

And by the way, you're brown bagging it and you're recycling the bag. Do you know what I mean? That thing's going to be all crinkled and refilled. You rinse out the Ziploc bag and you got to dry it out and use it again. Yeah, like y'all put the whoa and broke. I mean, yikes.

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course. Welcome back to the Ramsey show. I'm Ken Kolma. Jade Warshaw is alongside. You know, we were talking during the break today about some of the calls we've had so far on the show today. And we keep coming back to the same thing. People get into tough financial situations, largely because they have no budget at financial situations largely because they have no budget at all and because they have no budget at all they they have no idea when they make a decision for too much rent no idea what the real impact is so

the best way to make the most of your money is by creating a ticket to a budget. Every dollar makes it simple to plan, spending, track expenses save for what matters most to you and can I just say keeps you out of traps? Yes, because you know what you actually have coming in. That's right What's going out and you're not susceptible to shiny things or things that are gonna hurt you Keep your pulse on your spending by downloading every dollar for free in the app store or Google Play or you can click the link In our show notes if you're listening on YouTube or our podcast. Alright John is up next in Dallas Texas. John how can we help today? Hey guys thanks for taking my call. You

bet. So kind of in a situation right now job searching, setting up interviews, but we're getting towards the end of the year, right? And I work in an industry where I guess bonuses are pretty much guaranteed at the end of the year, even though I don't bank on them at the end of the year. I'm setting up these interviews. I do it for end of year review of my current job. I'm pretty, I've taken both should I quit my job quiz and it's actually, you know, told me I'm in a wrong role, wrong place. Okay. Those were the results.

Good. So the answer is yes, you should quit your job when your results are wrong role, wrong place, unless you raise your hand when your results are wrong place, unless you raise your hand and your leader or other leaders go, we see that and we'd like to get you the right role. But when you get the wrong place, that still may not change it. So let's just keep going with the question. So what is your question on this? Well, I mean, with the bonus, I guess, is, you know, I'm expecting usually, you know, five to ten thousand dollars at the end of the year. Yeah. That's what I'm due up for. And I

don't know when I'm going to get a job offer. I'm pretty confident in these interviews that I've got coming up here in the next week that I'll have an offer in my hands before the bonus is due and probably before my end of year review I'm just wondering how to navigate this situation where I feel that I'm owed this bonus that I've you know what and what makes you feel that sense of I I am owed this bonus What what makes you feel that? Well, I just well This is not a difficult question. I know what the answer is. I want you to say it though. Why do you feel that you're owed this bonus at the end of this year? It just feels like I'm leaving money on the

table. No, that's not the right answer. Let me ask you a couple questions. Are you doing a good job for these folks? At my current job? Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Are you giving it your best even though you know it's not where you're supposed to belong to? Are you giving it your best?

Yep. Absolutely. All right. So let me re-ask the question. Why do you feel like you deserve your bonus? Yeah, because I work hard for it. Yes. All right.

Ding, ding, ding. All right. Jay, tell him what he's won. Some confidence. Yeah. All right! Ding ding ding! All right! Jay, tell him what he's won! Some confidence! Yeah. All right. So John, I led you into that because let me just tell you, I know what the question is, so I'm going to jump ahead. Okay? First of all, I appreciate that you believe that you're going to have an offer before your year-end review

and bonus. But the reality is, you don't know that, I don't know that, and Jay doesn't know that either. So I would keep walking forward. You are not doing anything unethical by searching for other jobs. Nothing dastardly and dark and unethical, nefarious, great word. There's nothing wrong with what you're doing. Now let's just say that you do get an offer before your year-end meeting and your bonus. And they say they want you to start first of the year. What are you gonna do? Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, you do.

I don't know. What are you going to do? Do you deserve that bonus for the work you've done this year? Yeah, absolutely. So, John, what are you going to do if the start date is after the first of the year? What are you going to do? I'm going to get my bonus? Yes!

Yes! But because here's the deal. Here's the deal. First of all, this isn't the normal question that we get. This is not for Jade and I to tell you what you should do. I'm trying to walk you into a situation where you are thinking clearly, because you've got two strangers who we don't have any dog in this fight. But if in fact the bonus is based on the

work you've done for this organization this year, then get your bonus. If you don't feel comfortable with that, then walk before the annual's up. I don't think there's a right or wrong here because the bonus is based on the work you've done for them to this point, if I'm understanding this correctly. Jade, do you have any kind of head tilt on that? No, not at all. Yeah, so, you know, I just don't, I don't think that you're as certain as you think you are.

I think where my concern comes from is what people think of if I do leave after the fact. I like the people I work with and the industry I'm in, connections. I just think right now with that change, I don't want people to be like, oh, that John guy. that change like I don't want I don't want people to be like oh that John guy you know right and I appreciate that but John is accepting a bonus and then a bonus for work you've done and then leaving is that unethical? No. It's just called planning. Is it? It's just planning. One more question John. Is it illegal?

No. All right then, then I don't give a crap what anybody thinks about me taking the money that I've earned. You can think all the things you want to, and I'm gonna tell them to go pound sand. Kick rocks. Kick rocks. Listen, they, here's the other thing,

you're a good guy, John, but this is about some manufactured guilt that you've got put up in your head because you're a good person. And I don't think that if this scenario plays out this way, you get to choose. You get to choose because the bonus is not a signing bonus. The bonus is on work that you've done this year

and you're not stealing any money from the company. So there may be people who take issue with Jade and I on that. I don't think anybody would even think that of you, John. Well, first of all, they got too many other things going on with their life. You're leaving for a better opportunity. If they don't like you because of that, guess what?

Those aren't people I wanna do life with. Also true. I can tell you this right now, this is a true story. If me or Jade leaves Ramsey Solutions, I can promise you that me and Jade will be friends with each other after this place because I'm for her, she's for me, we're friends outside of this place. And I'd have no thought of, I wonder if he tried to stay longer to get a boner. I would be like, if Jade

came in and said I get this great opportunity and I'm going, I'd go, two things I would go, I'm gonna miss you around here and then I'd go go girl that's the absolute truth yeah so I'm only bringing that up to say that's who you know are your actual work friends people that would badmouth you because you took a good opportunity for you yeah that's not a friend well that doesn't even make sense to me. I agree. I yeah, 100%. I think you're overthinking this. Greatly. Yeah. So John, this may not even be a problem. You know what I hope happens? I hope that these interviews go well. And you get a job offer late in the year. Yeah, and they pick the start date. And it's not till mid or late January. Ding ding. And you cash the bonus and everybody's right with the world.

And then the people that like you and value you, they're going to go, way to go, John. Good for you, pal. Are we still getting together for a pickleball on Wednesday night? You know, or whatever. I think that's the play here. So you're a good man. I walked you through that because when there's guilt, Jade, we've got to go, why is there guilt?

And there should only be guilt when it's unethical or illegal. Yeah. Or mean-spirited. Yeah. None of that was there. A jerk move. None of that was there. Yeah.

So John, you're a good man as evidenced by how you handled that. So I hope you get a fat bonus. I hope it's not a jelly of the Month club like Clark Griswold got. That's no fun. Although, Cousin Eddie said, it was the gift that keeps on giving. This is The Ramsey Show. Hey, if you're like me, this time of year feels bananas. Thanksgiving just flies by and then you blink and the kids are out of school, family's in town and somehow there's glitter everywhere. Pure chaos.

And let's face it, the last thing you need right now is money stress. If you want to lighten your mental load this year, do yourself a favor and go download every dollar. It's my favorite budgeting app and it can help you create a game plan for your spending so you can focus on what really matters this time of year. Listen, the holiday season is going to be busy. There's no getting around that. But let's be busy enjoying our families instead of stressing out about money. Head over to the App Store and download every dollar right now to get started for free.

Welcome back to The Ramsey Show. I'm Ken Coleman. I'm joined in studio with, or by rather, Jade Warshaw, 888-825-5225, 888-825-5225. Alright, let's see. We've got our Ramsey Network app question and this is from Gabriel. He asks, can you really win money with apps like Bingo Winner and Mr. Beast's new app, or is it a scam? Also, I was wondering if Acorns and Robinhood, I'm sorry, are good investment options. I'm 50 years old, I don't know what Bingo Winner is

and I barely know who Mr. Beast is. So I'm unqualified to even answer this question. Because I don't even know what that means. Can you win money with their apps? I don't have the foggiest idea. Anybody in there? Anybody? Zack, Kelly, do you know what they're talking?

I have no idea. The last game I played was words with friends and there was no like option to win money. So I'm guessing it's one of these apps, like a candy crud crunch. The only app that I play in is a fantasy football and that has nothing to do with any of this. That's just me.

Can I give a hot take? Yes, please bail me out cause I don't know how to answer this question. All right, this is controversy and I own I own that boy. I am here for this I'm gonna I'm gonna get you for this. I feel like if you have time to play games on your phone You know something's wrong Like who has like if you're out working and crushing it and taking care of your family You don't have time to play games on your phone.

I have zero problem with this. This is not controversial to me. And to put money into it, like money? I have no game apps on my phone. So I feel like I'm in Jade's good, good stead right now. And I'm like, I just, I can't understand that. I can't, watch a show, like watch a show with your spouse or read a book. Have a conversation with somebody.

But to spend money on a game inside your phone that's called Bingo Winner? Yeah. I'm going to go ahead and say that I don't know if it's a scam, but you should not be spending your time on it. There's no ROI on your time. And I'll bet there's not much ROI on the money. And then I was wondering if Acorns and Robinhood are good investment options. Robinhood is an investment platform. We are very clear at Ramsey Sluis

is what our investment strategy is. I'll hand it to my colleague to give a very quick, give a 60-second investment strategy. That would be our answer to any of this. Yeah, I don't like these apps because they really, they're really more about trading and the idea of I'm putting a little bit here but I can move it at any time, and that's not our strategy.

We are long-term investors, we are people who dollar cost average, we are people who set it and forget it and keep it there for a long period of time. And so that's why I don't like these apps because they don't promote that. who set it and forget it and keep it there for a long period of time. And so that's why I don't like these apps because they don't promote that. So I would invest with my 401k through my job

or I'd be a part of a brokerage and have my Roth IRA. I gotta confess, I just put the old readers on. I mean, look at the graphic, look at the graphic on that. I just typed in bingo winner app and boy talk about getting me in trouble. Anything that looks like that is designed to suck the brain right out of your head. That's my ruling on that. It looks like it's designed to keep you addicted, whatever it is.

Let me tell you what I know, successful millionaires aren't spending a lot of time on Bingo Win. There you go. So now I've got a ruling. Okay, now we can move on. Thank goodness. Wow, that was something, wasn't it? I'm never getting that time back, neither are you. Matthew is up in Austin, Texas. Matthew, how can we help?

Are you all better? Well we're better now. Yeah, we're glad you're here. We're thrilled about your question. What is it? You sound like you always got it together, son. Just need your help thinking I'm supposed to get married here in a couple weeks. Congrats.

Thanks, there. But yikes, kind of. And it has mainly to do with kids. I've got kids and how my new wife interacts. I guess the question being how much does my new wife have say so into how I raise my kids, spend money on my kids, and that type of thing because I'm really kind of struggling with it. All right. Real quick question because my colleague is loaded up, ready to go. I want to know this, how long have you two been dating?

Two years. Two years, and in the two years, has there been moments of tension based on her maybe stepping into some situations that the kids weren't really cool with, or you weren't cool with, or there've been some comments. I'm just giving you what I mean when I say moments, is have there been several moments of tension

that lead to this concern? There's enough. I knew the answer to that. It's not a key. Yeah, my friend. She's not, she, yeah. I would just say this, this needs to be settled in premarital counseling stat.

How old are the kids? Immediately. They're not young, and so I got two in college, one that's a teenager. Well the two in college, that's a non-factor. She doesn't get to say anything about that. And how old's the teenager? She's 16, but for example, like when the subject comes comes up and I don't like saying this and I know it's probably wrong but I say I'm a dad first if you make me choose.

Is that a wrong thing to say? Yes. Yeah because you're treating it like she's expendable and technically now I know this is different and I am going to step lightly on this, but typically when you get married, it's the marriage first. That's why I said what I said. And then it's the kids.

Now, also traditionally, the person you're married to is the person you've had children with. So it's easier to make that statement, and I wanna hang out there. It is easier to make that statement when that's the case. In your case, I don't think out there it is easier to make that statement when that's the case in your case I don't think it makes it any less true, but I think it makes it more difficult to stand on that Can agree I agree I'm gonna default to you called us because you've got some real fear and

I'm glad you called us if for no other reason and then I'm telling you as a guy who went through pre marital counseling If for no other reason than I'm telling you as a guy who went through pre-marital counseling and I've been married 26 years long enough to know that had Stacey and I not been on the same page about the major things, I don't know that we're here. Same, same. Do you know? Yes. And so I'm just saying that Matthew, you need to invest time and money into premarital counseling to sit with a professional therapist and get this stuff out on the table.

Like you've got to say, she has created this tension here. I feel like she stepped over here. She needs to be able to say, I didn't like it when you said I'm a dad first. Like we got to get this all out before we lock in. And then there's the kids side of this too. There is the kids side of it but they got to solve it between the two of them first. You got to know what life is going to look like day one. Now we manage those decisions after that. He's nice to my kids that's not it but we're kind of different when things come up like, well, I go,

what is she saying? Well, if they're 22, they're going to be on their own. Like, well, yeah, but I sure hope so. But what if something happens and they need to move back in, you know, that kind of thing? Again, those things come up or are you going to pay for the master's degrees too, instead of us going to Hawaii for vacation? So I'm like, wait a minute. So yeah, she's got to realize that there's a whole life here and there's other people. These are good questions. She's marrying into the family, not just you. And that's the case with anybody. You marry into the family, you marry into the situation, whatever it is. So I think that you guys, Ken is right, there's a lot that must be discussed before this happens. And Matthew, look.

I only got two weeks. Oh wow. Okay. Well you know what, is this a big fancy wedding when we got a lot of people coming and a lot of money being spent? No, but I can't move today, it's not moving, so. You know what, that's great? I appreciate Matthew. He's

going, listen, Ken, I know where you're going, pal. I don't want to walk down that path. I would. I would. I would. I would. I would. Because what I don't want, I would never want you to feel like you don't have a choice or like once the wheels are in motion, you can't, you know, put a wood stick in it and grind it to a halt. You can, you have choices still. You have a lot less choices once you say I do. I agree. I'd get a session in at least and talk about these majors.

I really would before the wedding. But can I also say that if she says, hey, are you gonna pay for their master's degree or are we gonna go to Hawaii? The answer is, where is my grass skirt? That's what the answer is. The kids can pay for their master's degree. Go with mama to Hawaii, man. Aloha. Come on. I thought you were going in a different direction with that kid. No. Kids need to pay for their own master's. No, I'm glad you did. I'm glad you said what you said. This is the Ramsey

Show. Hey, you're still here? What are you doing? You do know that the rest of today's show is playing right now over on the Ramsey Network app, right? All you got to do to finish the episode is search Ramsey Network in the App Store, Google Play Store, or just click the link in the show notes to download the app for free. Yep, you heard me right, for free. Then right there on the home screen, you can watch the rest of today's show. Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom. Alright, I'm getting out of here.

Enjoy. We'll see you on the app.