The Ramsey Show - Money’s Easy Until People Get Involved

Episode Date: June 10, 2025

🔗 ⁠⁠⁠Share the Ramsey 101 Playlist!⁠ Dave Ramsey and Jade Warshaw answer your questions and discuss: "My husband and I are fighting in Walmart over money problems." "Should I quit... my job to go to art school?" "Should I move out of the house or focus on paying back my parents?" "What should I do with a $500,000 inheritance?" "How do you feel about those "buy homes for cash" companies?" "We want a second child but we also have debt, what should we do?" "How do I navigate family business conflict?" "This guy I'm dating wants me to cash out my 401(k) to invest it all into crypto, what should I do?" "How do I pay off my debt as a single mom with a part-time job?" Next Steps: ✅ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Help us make the show better by taking this short survey!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📞 Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 weekdays from 2–5 p.m. ET or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠send us an email.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📱 Download the free Ramsey Network app! 📈 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Are you on track with the Baby Steps? Get a Free Personalized Plan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📊 ⁠⁠⁠For help with investing, get connected with a SmartVestor Pro.⁠ 💵 Start your free budget today. Download the EveryDollar app! 🏠 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get organized and prepared to buy or sell a home.⁠⁠⁠⁠ Connect with our Sponsors: Stop paying more and start shopping smarter at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Aldi⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get 10% off your first month of⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ BetterHelp⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Boost Mobile⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to switch today! Learn more about⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Christian Healthcare Ministries⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get started today with⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Churchill Mortgage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get 20% off when you join ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠DeleteMe⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Go to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ FAIRWINDS Credit Union⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for an exclusive account bundle! Save 15% on your first ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Field of Greens⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ order with code RAMSEY Find top Health Insurance Plans at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Health Trust Financial⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To find out more about student loan refinancing, check out⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Laurel Road⁠ Use code RAMSEY to save 20% at ⁠Mama Bear Legal Forms⁠ Visit⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ NetSuite⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ today to learn more Use promo code RAMSEY for 18% off at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Nokbox⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Timothy Plan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get started with ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YRefy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or call 844-2-RAMSEY Visit⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Zander Insurance⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for your free instant quote today! Explore more from Ramsey Network: 💸 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Ramsey Show Highlights⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 🧠 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Dr. John Delony Show⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 🍸 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Smart Money Happy Hour⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 💡 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Rachel Cruze Show⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 💰 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠George Kamel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 🪑 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Front Row Seat with Ken Coleman⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📈 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠EntreLeadership⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Ramsey Solutions is a paid, non-client promoter of SmartVestor Pros. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy Ramsey Solutions is a paid, non-client promoter of SmartVestor Pros. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's the Ramsey Show where we help people build wealth, do work that they love and create actual amazing relationships. Jade Waschall, Remzi personality number one best-selling author is my co-host today. Open phones here at triple-a 825-5225. Bianca is in Los Angeles. Hi Bianca, how are you? I'm pretty good, thank you. Good, how can we help? Yeah, so I have a spouse that we just got married maybe four or five months ago and he's super financially irresponsible. You're just finding that out or you kind of knew it before? I am really kind of just finding the gravity of it out, how deeply rooted it is. What's that mean? Tell us what that looks like?
Starting point is 00:01:08 Well, here's a couple of examples So he's behind on his child support because the job that he has was a contract job And so they'll contract for a few months and then they'll leave without work for a few months well, then he got another contract job and He got into a dispute with the guy there and ended up losing it. So his child support is in like arrears and he could even like, if they found out, he, I guess he could go to John and know the process is for child support, not being paid on time, but, um, that's just like one thing.
Starting point is 00:01:39 So when it comes to like the money, he's, when he gets paid, he wants to go get his hair done or me to get my hair done. And I'm like, okay, he wants to go get his hair done, or me to get my hair done, and I'm like, okay, we need to sacrifice this little bit of money so that we can actually take it and start paying off debts. He also has a car that's in his mom's name that's out for repossession, and so he tries to keep it hidden so it doesn't get repossessed. And it's just like a little thing. Okay, so how long did you guys date before you were married four months ago?
Starting point is 00:02:07 Not very long at all. We kind of met and then we just got married like a very short period of time afterwards. And how old are you two? I'm 41, he's 52. Oh, that makes it worse. Sounds like a story of two 20-year-olds. I know really it does. And you just so it's like you didn't know all of this and now that you're living together it's starting to be revealed what's
Starting point is 00:02:31 really going on. So when you sit down talk about it how does it go? He gets angry about it for example he just started this new job and he wanted to buy a shirt because his shirts from the job hadn't came through yet and I'm like well let's get the cheapest shirt when we're at Walmart and he's like well I want to get this shirt because his shirts from the job hadn't came through yet. And I'm like, well, let's get the cheapest shirt when we were at Walmart. And he's like, well, I want to get this shirt because it's better than this one or whatever, which was a little bit more. And I'm like, well, get the cheaper one till you get, you know, the one from every little bit of money that you can save and not spend matters. He's like, why do you not always argue with me that why you guys got to make a scene? And I'm like, I wasn't making
Starting point is 00:03:01 a scene. It's like he always refused to everything I say. He didn't agree. You don't have a money problem, darling. You got a husband problem. And there's part of this, here's a piece of advice. When you're arguing in Walmart over a shirt, we know the marriage is in trouble. Yes, but a piece of advice that you might try, cause I don't, you know, you still gotta,
Starting point is 00:03:29 you gotta try here for a minute. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. A piece of advice is not having this conversation in the moment, like not having the conversation in the moment that the bad behavior is taking place, but setting aside a time that has nothing to do, nothing's happened, you just say, hey, let's go get breakfast.
Starting point is 00:03:46 Like it's just a normal thing that you're gonna do. And then you say, here's some of the things I've been thinking about. And as much as you can put it towards you, here's what I'm thinking about, I'd really like to feel a little bit more peace financially. I'd really, some of the things I've been thinking about, right, and it's not saying you're spending too much on this your child supports
Starting point is 00:04:06 Do you're you know irresponsible not that you've been saying that but that's clearly the way he's feeling even though he is irresponsible I'm with you But how can we have that conversation in a way that possibly he could receive it and I'm not guaranteeing you that he will receive it But that's a better the hope that you've got is you guys... The Bible has a phrase that says, where there is no vision, the people perish. And what happens is you don't have a vision for your marriage and you don't have a vision for your financial future that you're aligned on. And so if you're up above the problem, looking at the ideas and saying, okay, we want to not be in repo. We want to be able to buy a shirt and not think about it.
Starting point is 00:04:51 We want to be able to retire with dignity. We want to be able to pay our bills and not have financial stress. These are our vision things. Okay, then what does that, what does those vision then lead us to? What principles do we need to implement? Well, we need to sacrifice, and we need to live on less than we make, and we need to be on a written plan. And in order to accomplish the principles, the vision that we've agreed to, instead you guys are down in the ditch fighting about
Starting point is 00:05:20 a Walmart shirt. Right, and it's not just Walmart shirt. I know, darlin', but that's a metaphor for this whole thing. Right, now I got you. So if you can't, if the two of you can't rise up above what is your functioning, I'm not sure you are personally, but the stories you've told me, we got married in 30 seconds and the way you've addressed these things and the way he's behaving, all of these are indicators of immaturity. And at least in those moments you were immature.
Starting point is 00:05:50 Short-term thinkers, not long-term thinkers. That's what maturity is. And so, and that's a lack of vision. And I'm not saying you are that person, I'm saying in those moments you are. I might have been immature this weekend, okay? So I'm not saying it's a momentary thing, but if he is as a category financially irresponsible and immature, that's a large problem. The only way you're going to fix that is for the two of you to get above that and have a long-term thing that we're willing to build together towards. If you can't accomplish that by the
Starting point is 00:06:23 two of you talking about it above the problem, not talking about the symptoms, let's get above the problem, and if you can't get that, then you probably need to sit down with a good marriage counselor, and I kind of think you probably do. I think so too. Yeah. Yeah. Like she said, I've actually said, let's schedule some time to talk about it, and he like, you know, kind of brushes brushes it off. It's really adamant about and angry and yelling and stuff. He feels really threatened. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Or inexposed. And he has a car.
Starting point is 00:06:51 He has a car that doesn't work that's got 200 plus miles, thousand miles on it and I'm like well at least sell that and get a couple of thousand dollars. Well I don't want to sell it. It's gonna be worth some money. But that's what you're saying and I understand why you're saying that. All of those are symptoms. Why it's not working is you're telling him what to do and I get to fix the phone. What you're saying, and I understand why you're saying that. All of those are symptoms. Why it's not working is you're telling him what to do, and I get it, and from a logical perspective, it's easy, why wouldn't he just do this? Why wouldn't he do that?
Starting point is 00:07:12 Well, he asked me what to do, and I'm like, here's my thing you should do. Don't ask me if you don't think I should give you my opinion about it. Yeah, I think you guys don't know how to do conflict. What I think we ought to do is I think we ought to agree on some principles, and the principles will tell us what to do. The principles will say buy the cheaper shirt at Walmart
Starting point is 00:07:30 or just wear one you got till the new ones come in. The principles will say sell the old car. The principles will say that a responsible grown man doesn't short his own children, he catches up on his child support. The principles say we're going to sit down together and map out a life that has peace and sustainability and love and not all this angst and disrespect. He feels very disrespected and you're scared because you think you've signed up for a bad
Starting point is 00:08:00 trip here. Yeah, yeah. Exactly. And let me just add this. So I met him because I have two properties and one of them I was air being being out. So I started air being being my property out and he was like my first guest.
Starting point is 00:08:11 And he ended up like taking to me and liking me and fixing stuff around the house. And then, you know, we kind of didn't really date but we got married shortly there after him becoming a guest here. And I'm like, did you just need a place to stay at? Like, I don't know. You're starting to feel used, yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:29 So again, to save this, you've got to get above it. Otherwise, it's not going to be saved. I don't give you two years. Counseling is a must. Max. You do need a marriage counselor in your corner. And they can help. Hopefully, they can walk you through it. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:08:45 I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:08:52 I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:08:58 I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Sticking to a budget is hard enough and inflation, George, it isn't helping us.
Starting point is 00:09:05 Yep. In fact, 54% of Americans say it's a challenge to save on groceries without sacrificing quality. But Aldi makes it easy. Aldi's private label, it is delicious food with incredible prices that you can stay within your budget. Yeah. Aldi has the lowest prices of any national grocery store, which is really impressive. And with all the money you save, you're going to be making more progress
Starting point is 00:09:27 toward your financial goals. Yes, which is what we want for you guys. So stop overpaying and start shopping at Aldi. Find a store near you today at Aldi.us. That's ALDI.us. So if you're going to get married, the data tells us a couple of things that's helpful. Data is not always 100% accurate. There are averages, which means there's people on each side of the bell curve, but the bell curve in the middle says this, a good fully engaged present in the same city
Starting point is 00:10:12 engagement for around six months has the highest probability of marriage success. Five-year engagements aren't real engagements. Those are people shacking up together talking about getting married. Five-day engagements are a date that went crazy. The data says six-month engagements on average lead to long-term marriage. It's, you know, now that can be nine months, it could be four months, it could be whatever. I've got friends that dated for a few weeks and been married 40 years. There are exceptions. I'm just telling you, the data says on average.
Starting point is 00:10:50 What was yours? How long did you date Sharon and how long were y'all engaged? We started dating in February. We got married the following June, which would have been, we dated for 18 months. And we were in college. Uh-huh, uh-huh. And we got married right out of college,
Starting point is 00:11:08 the day we graduated from college. So there was a timing thing there. It really wasn't as scientific as I just laid it out a minute ago. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. And we got engaged in September and got married in June, so that's gonna be nine months. Okay, that's somewhat the same.
Starting point is 00:11:22 But again, that was senior year of college. So the senior year was dictating it, not the actual engagement. That kinda had something to do with it. But it just turned out, I had no idea. I was a stupid redneck, hell-raising hillbilly. I had no idea what I was doing. I mean, she just, I just got lucky and she didn't.
Starting point is 00:11:41 That's all it was. So, but the, you know, so't, that's all it was. So anyway, that's how we signed up 43 years ago for that deal. But the data does say that. The data also tells us that if you're gonna get married to be in agreement before you're married in detail, preferably in the office of a pre-marriage counseling. By the way, pre-marriage counseling
Starting point is 00:11:59 is a large indicator for success going in, and very few people do it. The Catholics do a really good job, really if you're Catholic, in general they have the best program I've ever seen on pre-marriage counseling. It's in-depth. I mean they take you through it. They talk about your mama. You know, I mean they go into everything, you know, that kind of stuff. So and his mama and all that, right? And so that's good pre-marriage counseling. But anyway, in that you need to be in They go into everything, you know, that kind of stuff, and his mama, and all that, right?
Starting point is 00:12:25 That's good. That's good. Pre-marriage counseling, but anyway, in that, you need to be in agreement on four things. Money in detail, debt, saving, generosity, budgeting, who's the spender, who's the saver, who's the nerd, who's the free spirit, who believes in abundance, who lives in scarcity, all of that. And because number one calls a divorce in North America is money problems and money fights of the lady that just called. What are the other ones?
Starting point is 00:12:54 Religion? Religion. Kids? Kids. Dealing with kids, how many to have and who's in charge? Hatteras on. Is the asylum, are the kids, are the inmates in charge of the asylum? What about politics?
Starting point is 00:13:04 In other words, are your children free range? You kids, are the inmates in charge of the asylum? What about politics? In other words, are your children free range? You know, and so that kind of stuff, right? And so, and then the last one's in-laws. In-laws, okay, not politics. Extended family. Extended family is the number four. Because there's crazy in every family, and if you think there's not crazy in your family,
Starting point is 00:13:19 it means it's you. So you gotta figure that out and go, how are we gonna deal when, you know. When you got to figure that out and go, how are we going to deal when, you know... When grandma wants to move in? Or money? That's a bad one. Or when your brother-in-law who does drugs comes by and wants money. But he's hungry. I don't want him to be on the street. Well, he chose that when he chose heroin. So, you know, but the, this is, you gotta decide this stuff ahead of time. So these are the four things with pre-marriage counseling and a medium to lengthy engagement
Starting point is 00:13:52 that are high indicators for the probability. Now I don't want to take all the romance out of this and turn it into a science project, but you ought to use some common sense and go, that's what the data says. So if you're not in agreement on those four things, you're going to have a problem. If you have a short engagement, you're more likely to have a problem than if you don't. If you have a super long engagement, you're more likely to have a problem than if you don't. You know, these are the things that you run into and so you can, especially those of you,
Starting point is 00:14:18 we've got this tremendous number of young people listening and watching now on YouTube and TikTok and so forth. And so because the guy, we were at a nice hotel in California last weekend playing golf There were young people listening and watching now on YouTube and TikTok and so forth. Because the guy, we were at a nice hotel in California last weekend playing golf and the young man that was taking our car and parking it for us was just an incredible young guy. I got to talk to him a long time, but he just came up and he went on and on, oh I love Dave, you're Dave Ramsey, oh my God, he was like starstruck. And I'm like dude, it's just me, it's okay.
Starting point is 00:14:43 It's just, what are you working on? Tell me what you're doing. And he told me his whole story is just incredible, young dude. Those guys are everywhere. And so I'm kind of talking to him. That's kind of who I've got in my head right now. Because he's dating some girl, I'm sure.
Starting point is 00:14:54 He didn't bring that up, but I'm sure he is. And you gotta be thinking about, okay, what's the, what can I do to make this, the love of my life, the highest probability of success? Yeah, you do have to think like that. That's being a grownup and stuff. I think so. Well, you just took all the romance out of it.
Starting point is 00:15:12 No, baby, let me tell you what romance is. Romance is 43 years. That's freaking romance. And I would rather spend time with her than any of you. Okay? Best friends. So that's romance. So you don't get to get there without this other stuff. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:29 Because you kill each other. That's true, that's true. Gabriel's in Pittsburgh. Hey Gabriel, what's up? Hi Dave, how are you? Better than I deserve, how can I help? I'm just wondering, I'm willing to kind of quit my job that I'm really not interested in anymore.
Starting point is 00:15:51 I want to see if I should quit it, so that way I can go to college and pursue the job that I actually want to have. What's the job you actually want to have? I want to become a production designer. A production designer, tell us what that does. So they're the ones who oversee and show everything that happens like in the movies, TV, commercials, everything that you see on camera. They're the ones responsible for that. When have you done that? I haven't done it yet. I've
Starting point is 00:16:26 just been researching it ever since I was in high school and I was getting into, I studied acting, directing, lighting, technology, all sorts of things. Where did you study that? Oh I studied it while I was in high school and currently I'm in acting right now. I do like community theater and that sort of thing. Oh good of thing. I study it all my own time. Is there someone that does that in your acting studio? Like when you go to your acting, is there someone that does that job there? Well, it's a community theater.
Starting point is 00:16:54 So I actually will even work the tech booth and I will get insight from everyone who's done acting outside of that theater. Who built your sets? So it's all live on stage, so there's some people who come in and volunteer and help do costumes and design. That would be you. Well, I'm actually, I do the acting. I don't want to.
Starting point is 00:17:17 No, honey, we're just saying if you want to do that stuff, you ought to be doing that stuff. Uh-huh. And you're surrounded by people who are doing that stuff that you can learn from, is what we're saying. Okay. Okay. No, you don't need a surrounded by people who are doing that stuff that you can learn from is what we're saying Okay, okay. No, you don't need a four-year degree to doing that if you were in Hollywood or you were in Atlanta Which are probably the two largest soundstage areas right now
Starting point is 00:17:40 If you were on one of those stages, you would not find a lot of four-year degree to people building those sets Okay, so now would that be for like everyone like even the ones doing the movies and stuff too? Yeah, that's the sound stage. That's where they do movies on sound stages. Okay, okay. So they usually just do it through experience? Yeah, there's very few of them. Some of them have art degrees, some of them have graphic arts degrees. They all have a bent the way that you do, which is towards your creative. That's how you're wired, which is wonderful. And I want you to pursue this. I just don't think a four-year degree is necessary for you to go do it. It might be, but I doubt it.
Starting point is 00:18:13 I'm not an expert on the space. I've never hired anybody to do what you do full-time. I mean, we have a lot of stages built and things for Ramsey, but they're a little different than what you're talking about. And so event stages and so forth which are way different than theater or certainly different than movie. But I think you'll find that there's a lot of technology involved and a lot of apprenticeship type roles.
Starting point is 00:18:43 That's what I would have you get into. If I were your dad I would say move to LA or move to Atlanta and start working and go push a broom first if you have to and be around those people and then tell them I'll help you stand that thing up, oh I'll help you move that chair, I'll help you with this paintbrush and you just work your way in and ingratiate yourself to the folks. Even if you had to work a side job somewhere else, I would rather you do that and work
Starting point is 00:19:10 your way into the business. I'm going to send you a copy of Ken Coleman's book, The Proximity Principle, which is what I'm describing to you. Get in the proximity of people doing what you want to do. You might discover Dave Ramsey's full of it and you do need a four-year degree. If you do, then go get need a four-year degree. If you do then go get your four-year degree. But if I were you I would move to where it's actually happening and go do it. Let me tell you something. Most home security systems don't work until after someone breaks in. That's like putting your seatbelt on after the wreck. It's too late. And that's why I
Starting point is 00:19:56 recommend SimpliSafe. Their active guard outdoor protection helps stop break-ins before they happen. Their AI powered cameras work together with live simply safe agents to monitor your property in real time. So if someone's creeping around your house those agents can talk to them, trigger the spotlight, and even call the police right then and there. It's proactive protection, not just a dressed up burglar alarm. Plans start at around a dollar a day, there are no contracts and no hidden fees, and they offer a 60-day money back guarantee.
Starting point is 00:20:32 So see why over 4 million Americans trust Simply Safe. See why Newsweek and USA Today both ranked Simply Safe number one in customer service and why CNET named it the best home security system of 2025. Plus right now, you can get 50% off a new Simply Safe system with 24-7 professional monitoring at simply safedirect.com. That's 50% off at simply safedirect.com. There's no safe like Simply Safe.
Starting point is 00:21:22 Jade Waschall, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host. Derek is in co-host. Derrick is in St. Louis. Hi Derrick, how are you? Hello Mr. Randy, thank you so much for having me on today. Sure, what's up? I have a question here. I just wanted some Christian advice for my finances.
Starting point is 00:21:36 I just graduated from dental school on Saturday and now I'm a dentist and I signed a two-year contract with an office and my daily minimum is $1,200 a day. And I currently have $215,000 worth of debt to my parents. And that's at 0% interest. I still live at home and I commute to work about 40 minutes and I'm looking to move out and not, I mean, I still get along with my parents and I can still live here probably for another two years, but I'm 26 years old and I kind of want to get out of the house. And I'm just kind of looking for some advice on how I should be investing my
Starting point is 00:22:14 money, how quickly I should be paying my parents back. That's a lot of debt. That's a lot of debt. I's a lot of debt. Yeah. I mean, I would be interested in moving out. You said you're 26. Yeah, I'd be interested in moving out and maybe closer to where you're working since you've got that commute. And then, is this your only debt?
Starting point is 00:22:34 Is this the only thing you have? Yeah, it's only $215,000. I mean, it is a lot. I'd say only, but I'm going to be instructed by the director. Two one five or two five oh? $215,000. Okay. Okay, and you're. 215,000 or 250? $215,000. Okay. And you're making $350,000 a year?
Starting point is 00:22:49 Yes. Okay. Yes, sir. And the year before you graduated from dental school, your income was what? Zero. I mean, zero dollars. Yeah. So if you were to move out into a tiny little apartment and your car is paid for, right?
Starting point is 00:23:07 Yes, sir. Yes, sir. And you don't borrow any money and you don't go on vacation and you don't go out to eat, and you pay your dad back in a year? That's the plan, yes sir. That would be fine with me, yeah? I would do that. I would do that.
Starting point is 00:23:22 I think that is good. And honestly, I don't think Christian has anything to do with that, by the way. I think it's just a matter of, it's a developmental thing and, you know, the only thing that comes into Christian here is you don't want to be in debt, the borrower or slave to the lender, and you want to honor your father and mother, and we're not going to dishonor them with either one of these answers, and we're not going to not pay the debt with either one of these answers. So there's not a Christian answer versus a non-Christian answer to the question. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:47 Yes, sir. Yeah, I think you can do this lickety split. I mean, if you make $350 and you live on $100. Nothing. No investing, no saving, no life. You had no life last year. Yeah, last eight years of my life. Yeah, so you got one more year.
Starting point is 00:24:04 So let me tell you one of the things we've observed Eric and it'll help you I think if we if we frame it this way we we we call it doc-itis Okay, so one of the things you have been able to do that virtually none of the rest of the public in the United States Has the ability to do? fabulously Complimentary to you is that you have the ability to delay pleasure beyond belief for a greater good. I mean, you've been in school forever, you've been sacrificing, you've been nose to the grindstone, you've been holding your breath, however we
Starting point is 00:24:38 want to say it, while, you know, for eight years after your buddies graduate from high school, you have delayed gratification to get a greater win. And docs do that and dentists do that, lawyers do that, because you're doing a lot of postgraduate work, in other words. And what ends up happening though in those professions, because you make a lot of money when you come out, hypothetically, and you are making a lot of money, thank goodness, is that you've been holding your breath so long and people when they graduate and finally get the job, they exhale and the exhale sounds like new BMW in a new house. No sir. And well that's that's called docitis because all the all the young broke docs and dentists have bigger debt than docs do on average.
Starting point is 00:25:30 A lot of dentists we talked to are 450, okay? And so, you know, so a lot of young dentists and docs have nice houses, nice cars, and an eight-year plan to get out of debt. Because they felt like they deserved finally to get something. And so that's called docitis. And so just avoid docitis. Don't catch the disease. Keep living like a broke dental student
Starting point is 00:25:57 for one more year and put this whole thing in the rear view mirror. Because then, dude, you're making 400K and you got zero debt. You know how fast you're gonna be a multi-millionaire it's gonna be unbelievable and don't sign up for a half million dollars to buy into a practice either. That's my long-term goal.
Starting point is 00:26:20 Save up and pay for it. Yes sir. You have this wonderful income keep your stinking lifestyle down clear your dad bank some money and get ready to buy a practice with cash Mm-hmm. You do that by the time you're 30 Yes You're a stud man. I'm proud of you Well, thank you, sir. I appreciate it and I think I know my answer this and came on us the grindstone and.
Starting point is 00:26:46 Yep. One year, one year. Hey dad, in one year. I think you stunned him. Well, it's good. He's good. He's good. I mean, because most, you know, how many times we always had, I like that. That's a good call. That is a good call. Very good stuff. Before he, before it was worse, he called before it got worse, which is good. Yeah. Way to go. Carol is in Houston. Hey Carol, how are you? I'm fine, thanks. How are you today? Better than I deserve. What's up?
Starting point is 00:27:11 Well, thank you for taking my call. Mom just recently passed and I haven't moved anything yet. Thank you. But I wanted to get some advice on suggestions on where to be moving her money into. Okay. So let's you ask the question. Her money is now your money?
Starting point is 00:27:35 Yes, I'm sole beneficiary. How long ago did she pass? Almost one month ago. Oh, I'm so sorry. What happened? Alzheimer's. How old was she? I cared for her for 96 years old. Wow! What a long life.
Starting point is 00:27:51 Way to go, Mom! All right! My mom always said that she wanted to live as long as her dad, and she got her wish. She died one day before her 97th birthday. Wow. So how much did she leave you? A little over half a million. Wow. And how much did you have before that? About the same amount. I have saved and invested.
Starting point is 00:28:20 So are you 70? No, you're good. 71. Well, I guessed a 96-year-old might have had you when you were 26. It wasn't hard, but yeah. Okay, wow. I know. Yeah, I'm 71. I'm retired. Okay. Well, the first thing we want to do is we want to honor mom's memory by doing stuff with the money that abides by the common sense that mom used to get the money. She also has passed that on to you. That's why you already have a half a million. Correct. You already have common sense so I'm gonna tell you to trust your instincts
Starting point is 00:28:52 first and foremost. Okay. You're your mother's daughter. Yes. You're capable of doing this. Okay. Okay. So the things that we would do with it is we would walk you up the baby steps. Yeah, so you are that we would do with it is we would walk you up the baby steps Yeah, so you you're worth five hundred thousand now. I'm assuming you have no debt or is there still some debt in the picture? No, get it all including your house Including my house Wow way to go. That's excellent. So you're really this is just an open field for you How did you receive the money? Is it property is it land is it?
Starting point is 00:29:34 I would say most of it's all going to be bank accounts. We sold her home and moved her closer to me when, you know, the dementia started and everything. So we sold her home. And between the sale of the home and her savings is where she has been able to achieve a half a million. Okay. You got kids? They're grown. Oh, you got grandkids? No. Okay, all right.
Starting point is 00:29:55 And all the money's liquid, none of it's invested, right? With mom, I would say it's all liquid with the exception of two cemetery plots. And after we go over her finances, I was going to make mention of that and tell you my options. I'm not using the cemetery plots. That's why I wanted to run something. I would sell them. Yeah, you could sell them off.
Starting point is 00:30:20 I also would recommend getting with the SmartVestor Pro and trying to invest some of this money because it just sitting in savings accounts. It's not growing to its full potential. And so that would probably be my first move. And like I said, you can go to ramsysolutions.com slash trusted to find someone to help you invest this money. Yeah, I'm 64 and I would put it in four types of mutual funds with Pro. Growth, growth and income,
Starting point is 00:30:45 aggressive growth and international. There's a time in your life and at the baby steps for renting, but you don't want to do it forever because when you rent, you're still paying for a mortgage, just somebody else's. Plus, rent means instability in your budget because it always goes up, never down. So when you're ready to buy, make sure you work with a mortgage partner you can rely on, Churchill Mortgage. Churchill is Ramsey Trusted to help you make the move from renting to home ownership wisely.
Starting point is 00:31:38 Churchill understands that when you buy a home the Ramsey way, your mortgage payment will be a consistent, manageable part of your monthly budget. Plus, when your home is paid off, that was your largest expense. Now it's extra money in your pocket and an asset towards turning you into a Baby Steps millionaire. Get started on the American dream of home ownership today at ChurchillMortgage.com. That's ChurchillMortgage.com. If you're tired of living paycheck to paycheck and you wonder where your money is going, your first step should be getting on a plan.
Starting point is 00:32:20 It's called a budget. Our team's hosting a free, free, free budgeting trainings, several of them this month. And you can learn step by step how to make and stick to a budget using the EveryDollar app. Plus you can get your biggest budgeting questions answered in a live Q&A. Sponsor limited, sign up for free at EveryDollar.com slash webinar. Today's Ramsey Show Question of the Day is sponsored by WhyRefi. When you're tired of making no progress on your defaulted private student loans, WhyRefi can help you explore a fresh start with low fixed rate refinancing.
Starting point is 00:33:01 So it's time to stop spinning your wheels and go to whyrefi.com slash Ramsey and learn more. That's why the letter Y R E F Y dot com slash Ramsey might not be in all states. All right today's question comes from Amy in Tennessee. She says how do you feel about those buy homes for cash companies? Our home has been on the market for months with no offers and we're running out of time to close on our new home. I could tell you what I think Dave's probably going to be the expert on this but my initial thought says if they're buying a
Starting point is 00:33:33 home for cash they know you're desperate they're probably going to give you a lower offer because it's in cash. And my bigger question to you would be why is it not selling. There's probably a reason maybe something that you can Take care of or handle as to why it's not selling. Maybe it's not priced, right? Maybe your home has a weird smell like maybe there's something going on Maybe it's your realtor. So those are questions. I'd I'd probably be asking first buy homes for cash feels Maybe it's the realtor that has a weird smell. Yeah, maybe the realtor has a weird smell
Starting point is 00:34:07 Hey, trust me. you don't want that. Sorry, I just went there. I mean, you know those signs that you see on the corner and they're like handwritten? Those are called wholesalers, meaning that they are buying the property for flipping. And if they're going to buy it at a price that they can resell it and make a profit, that's called a wholesale price and you're not gonna like that price. That means you are super desperate to buy this other house that you should probably just let go.
Starting point is 00:34:33 Because you probably have a contingency on closing on the new home. And the contingency says if your house hasn't sold that you're not required to close and you probably shouldn't close on it unless you can get rid of this other one without giving it away. I mean, are you going to give up an extra $50,000 or $100,000 or whatever the number is in order to just get this other property?
Starting point is 00:34:53 Yeah, so. But there's nothing like negative about those cash buyers. Like they're not doing anything wrong. I mean, some of them are slimy, but mostly it's just they're buying the property to resell. It's like a car dealer buying your car. That's right. They're going to give you the lowest. They're going to give you a wholesale on a trade-in value because they're going to resell
Starting point is 00:35:11 it at the retail value. And they make the profit on the difference in wholesale and retail. Yes, so they want that spread. Carvana or CarMax is not going to give you as much for your car as a private sale will. And so in most cases, I mean, there's very few exceptions to that. And that's true in the housing market. Now there are a few proper people buying single families out there that are buying them to hold long term and they're not individuals, they're more like hedge fund types.
Starting point is 00:35:40 And they're paying like retail. So if you want to get a price from one of them, it's probably not the sign on the corner, but you know what you've got to do is you have to get away from this sense of desperation that I'm running out of time. The way the sentence is structured tells me you're getting ready to give your house away and I don't want you to do that. Well she's already found a kitchen that she would rather be cooking in. She done got the fever. So there we go. Taylor is in San Francisco. Hi Taylor, how are you? Hi, I'm great. How are you all today? Better than I deserve.
Starting point is 00:36:17 What's up? Great. Madison and I have a child and we would love to consider having another, but we have some debt. So I'm just calling to ask about that. Why wouldn't you get pregnant today? Well, a lot of that is not specifically in our hands, but we're big fans of doing every dollar budget and Dave Ramsey shows. So we know that we need to save up before we have that child. We have about 97,000 on a healer
Starting point is 00:36:53 And that's all that we have but we're just we're looking at that from a perspective of now a full-time stay-at-home mom and It's around 65 is our's our bring home. In San Francisco? It's tight like a tiger. That's tough. San Francisco? In the city? Right. Right. Wow. Wow. Okay. I'm guessing things are tight.
Starting point is 00:37:20 Yes, sir. Yes, sir, it is. Okay. Okay. I mean, I'm all for, I'll tell you this, I'm all for entering parenthood and motherhood with your eyes wide open and kind of thinking through what that can mean cost-wise, while at the same time, I would not necessarily delay it unless you could really, unless you decide together, hey, we're just gonna do this for the next year and then go for it. It's gotta be a decision that you make together. It's not a Ramsey principle to say you must be out of debt before you have a child. And I think I heard you say something about saving up for a kid. And what we mean by that, it's not to say you don't get pregnant until you've saved
Starting point is 00:37:58 up this money. It's simply to say that if you're walking through the baby steps and you find that you are pregnant, you can pause the baby steps and save up cash during that process. Does that make sense? Okay. So I mean- Yeah, because I just, I feel like everything is so tight and with my husband being in a ministry type position, there's not really an opportunity for more. Does that make sense? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:21 Unless I go back to work. And I think that we both feel called for me staying at home. So I think we're just kind of in that. We're obviously praying through that, knowing that God has... You live in one of the most expensive markets in America, and you have a below average household income. Okay? That's what I was observing. That's why I went to San Francisco. Yeah, so that's why I said that. All right? So So I mean, you're obviously called there in the ministry, and that's wonderful. I'm glad you're there. And the thing is, we don't want to – no, we don't delay having children based on
Starting point is 00:39:01 income or based on debt. That's not a Ramsey principle. But we do use common sense in looking at these things overall. I mean, whether you have a child or not, you have a tight budget and you live in an expensive market and you have $97,000 in debt. Having a child is not really going to be the major issue that affects that. What's going to affect that is something that happens to the income or something that happens to the area you live in. And so you become a minister in another city, a pastor in another city that you can more afford to live in,
Starting point is 00:39:32 or at a better income, or you look at, that church looks at paying more in this situation. I don't know, but I mean long term, whether you've got one kid or two kids, you have a tight budget. And you need a plan. And I think that's what it boils down to is what is the plan versus just kind of saying, we'll see what happens. You come up with what you think, because plans can change, you come up with what you think the plan would be
Starting point is 00:39:58 if you had a child here in the near future, and you come up with what the plan would be if you waited. And then you look at it from both angles, because on the show, Dave, you know, as much as I do, people tend to look at it from one side, which is the best possible scenario, instead of looking at it as well, what happens if that's not the case? And then what would we do then? So that's my best advice to you, I can tell you that Sam and I delayed having
Starting point is 00:40:21 kids because of very similar issues,'s just the income wasn't there yet and we did have a lot of debt. It was a personal decision and one that I do not regret. Yeah, but again, what Jade says is true. We don't, as a blanket thing on the show, we don't give advice to say, you know, don't have children because of financial situation. I mean, I do think some common sense is involved.
Starting point is 00:40:44 Don't have 16 children. You know, when you make 16,000 a year. I mean, I you know, I do think some common sense is involved don't have 16 children, right? You know when you make sixteen thousand a year, I mean, come on I mean, there's that there's some common sense involved in this but but thinking about what in general don't don't wait to get married Right because of that, but I don't think about what it means for you to be home like when you're starting to do that What does it mean for us to go down to one income? What will that look like as opposed to not thinking about it at all? Think about if you're a person who will do daycare, what does it look like for us to pay for daycare once they hit six or seven months old?
Starting point is 00:41:10 Or whatever the plan may be, think through it. Don't just jump. Yeah. According to scripture, they're doing four things that are all godly. Yeah. They're adding arrows to their quiver. She wants to stay home and be there with the kids. He wants to serve the Lord in the ministry. They want to get out of debt. All of those things are
Starting point is 00:41:32 biblical. And so I'm going to ask Father for some help. Hey Dad, hey God, I need some help here. Explain to add arrows to the quiver for the folks who don't know what it is. Proverbs about having children. More arrows in your quiver is more children that you can release into the world. Hopefully they fly straight. Statistics show that half of Americans don't have enough life insurance, or they don't have any at all. I don't understand this, John. Why don't people want to take care of their family?
Starting point is 00:42:22 They think they're going to die or something? Well, I used to be one of those guys, I didn't even think about it. And one of my buddies said, Hey, the only reason to not have life insurance is if you hate your wife and kids. And I immediately went and got term life insurance. That's a gut punch.
Starting point is 00:42:35 And you're telling me, and for decades, Dave, I've sat across people who've lost a spouse. They've lost somebody important to them. Me too. And they don't know what to do next. Me too. I mean, you're going to have a crisis too. And they don't know what to do next. Me too. I mean, you're gonna have a crisis here. And you know, you got two options
Starting point is 00:42:48 while you're sitting and talking to a young widow. She's concerned about how she's gonna invest all this money properly and not mess this up, or she's concerned how she's gonna eat tomorrow. That's exactly right. These are the two options. And take care of your dad gum family, man. Term life insurance can replace income,
Starting point is 00:43:01 pay off debts, cover funeral expenses, so your family can actually have the opportunity to just be sad, to just miss you. That's exactly what it's supposed to be. It's saying I love you to your family. Term life insurance. Jeff Zander and the team at Zander Insurance makes it easy and affordable. I've used them personally for 25 years. They're the only people I trust.
Starting point is 00:43:23 Go to Zander.com or call 800-356-4282. Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's The Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth, do work that they love, and create actual amazing relationships. Jade Washaw, Ramsey personality number one bestselling author, is my co-host today. Open Phone's here at 888-825-5225. Kyle is in Cleveland, Ohio. Hi, Kyle, how are you? Hi, I'm doing well. How about yourself, Dave?
Starting point is 00:44:14 Better than I deserve. What's up? I'm calling today because I'm looking for some biblical counsel on navigating conflict within a family business. Wow. Something you might know something about. I'm looking for some biblical counsel on navigating conflict within a family business. Something you might know something about. Well, I know something about conflict and I know something about family business, so we'll try.
Starting point is 00:44:33 I appreciate it. Oh my gosh. Wow. What's going on, dude? I feel today I'm at a crossroads, and like I said, I'm trying to seek some biblical guidance. I feel today I'm at a crossroads and like I said, I'm trying to seek some biblical guidance but one story short is I left a successful corporate career working for a Fortune 500 company about five years ago. I joined my father and my younger brother in the business with a shared plan to eventually take over as my father stepped out. About six months ago there was a
Starting point is 00:45:03 little bit of a falling out that was building after my brother has pulled a little away from the business, reduced his hours, ultimately moving out of state and became increasingly disengaged. I confronted him about a little bit of the imbalance and felt I was almost being taken advantage of and that combined with some tension with my father ultimately left him in quitting the business. Since then, I've taken on a whole host of his responsibility. All the while, he continues to benefit financially, receiving the same distributions, still a small salary, health benefits and perks, and if nothing's changed.
Starting point is 00:45:41 And the long story short is, you know, I shared some of my displeasure with my father about the situation, but he doesn't want to go back on any of the equitable arrangement, even though it's coming at my expense. And I want to handle the situation in a godly way, but I'm feeling a little bit exhausted, slightly resentful, and I'm unsure how to move forward and trying to get some counsel. How old's your dad? He is 65 this year. What's the top-line revenue of the business? About 30 million. Okay. Well the family business research that we have done, one of the things it taught me, there's a guy that is probably, I guess, one of the Mount Rushmore guys in that space,
Starting point is 00:46:36 his name is John Ward, and he's a professor, I believe it's University of Michigan or Minnesota, one of the two, can't remember anyway. I bought a $39 book that was about an inch thick from him, but the information was worth it. And so one of the things in it was a Venn diagram. And the Venn diagram has three circles obviously intersecting in the middle, you know what that looks like. One of the circles is owner, one is family, and one is a team member or employee. Okay? And so, for instance, your mom would be or your cousin would be family but not an employee
Starting point is 00:47:16 and not an owner. Agreed? Agreed. Your dad would be owner, employee, and family member. You would be owner, family member, employee. And so that diagram helped me to say I've got to keep these three things separate. So it is, I run into a lot of family businesses that are run successfully where the owners are not necessarily all working there.
Starting point is 00:47:44 They're not paid in a salary and they're not paid benefits as an employee, but they are paid profit distributions because they're one of the owners. Okay. That's not unusual to be like a stockholder in a company that doesn't work at that, you know, you can buy stock in Home Depot and not work there and get distributions of their profits and so forth. And so that could be your brother, but he does need to get off the payroll and I don't care if you give him health benefits, whoop-de-doop-dee, but you know, then the thing is, okay, when your dad hands this over to you, you're then going to be a 50% owner or what with your brother?
Starting point is 00:48:28 30. Each of us have 30. 33. There's four total owners. There's 35 for my father, 30 for my brother, and I have five for another employee. Ah, okay. What's going to happen to your dad's shares when he's gone? He could choose to retain them, still is a passive equity owner, just I guess like how my brother is
Starting point is 00:48:56 today. Or there's a potential that perhaps some of it could flow my way. Right, so your dad has, that perhaps some of it could flow my way. Right. So your dad has... Any two of you can outvote your dad. Not the 5% guy, but the other two. So you and your brother could outvote your dad. You and your dad could outvote your brother. And your brother and your dad could outvote you. Okay? So the way that the operating agreement is actually structured is that
Starting point is 00:49:22 although my father only has 35% of the equity he has a hundred percent of the vote Okay, so he decides when is he going to give that up never? Dollar question I agree okay because what happens what happens when he gives that up is Then that you would be you need to be have controlling interest or you need to be sitting in that seat in the operating role to where you can decide what is distributed to the, to the non-employee family. Okay. So your dad's at home and retired, your brother's working another job in North Carolina or wherever
Starting point is 00:50:02 and you're the only one there but they all, they own 35 and 30 and when you do distribute profits to the owners they're gonna get their share but you're gonna be sitting in the operating seat that's what we've got to solve for and you have to solve for today but you need a you need a path to get there and your dad needs to take your brother off the payroll today that's not equitable I don't care if he gets health benefits whoop-de-dub-dee. I don't care if he gets a company cell phone whoop-de-dub-dee That's not a deal breaker. The deal breaker is control issues here and Then the distribution so if your dad is are you underpaid? No, okay, then you're paid for your position
Starting point is 00:50:41 By the way when you're the CEO and you're in control in the governing and operating role, okay, you also only collect a salary equivalent to a CEO of a $30 million company. All other profits need to be distributed to you and everyone else. So you don't get to double your salary to keep your brother from getting something. That would be unethical. Correct. I'm not trying to be punitive as well, but I agree with you there. I think the issue here is what you don't see is you don't see the old man walking out. I think your problem is with the old man, it's not with your brother. Your brother's just shying a light on it. You're probably right.
Starting point is 00:51:20 Yeah. He's got founder-itis, and founder-us is those of us that start something we're freaking hardheads We otherwise we wouldn't have been able to build what he built a 30 million dollar company from nothing he's a hardhead Yeah, it's his second one too. I agree. Yeah, and he can be a pain in the butt. That's how he got here. I Know this guy I look at him in the mirror Okay I know this guy. I look at him in the mirror. Okay? And so, but that's what you're dealing with. And dad, we need a plan where you're gonna hand this thing off instead of me leaving it all getting destroyed. Because if I don't see a plan, I'm starting to lose hope.
Starting point is 00:51:56 And this emotional stuff with the brothers brought it all to a head. And so we need to, that's the way we, you know, we need to resolve, we need to solve for 10 years from today and stage gate what has to happen, what are the things that has to happen for us to get to that point 10 years from today and solve for it. Let's be honest, shopping for health insurance can be confusing with high costs, complicated terms and customer service that doesn't really serve you. Most folks just pick a plan and hope for the best.
Starting point is 00:52:41 See, insurance companies don't work for you. They work for themselves, meaning they love it when you overpay. So you need a guide on your team to help you make the best choices. Health Trust Financial Works for you. They're not salespeople. They help you find the health insurance option that makes sense and saves you money.
Starting point is 00:53:03 The fact is, health insurance is one of the biggest expenses in your budget, but most people who work with Health Trust Financial end up saving $500 a month. Imagine putting that kind of money toward the baby steps. My team has worked with them for over 20 years and they've served thousands of people just like you. They're the only health insurance broker
Starting point is 00:53:24 that's Ramsey Trusted to help you. So stop throwing money away and get the health insurance that's right for you at healthtrustfinancial.com. That's healthtrustfinancial.com. Josh is in Pittsburgh. Hey Josh, how are you? Better than I deserve, you know. How are you? Just the same. How can I help? Doing great. I got a question. How do I combine finances with my wife when one spouse isn't willing to? Why isn't she willing to? I think maybe some of the long-term money goals. I
Starting point is 00:54:15 guess I'm wanting to put more towards investments and Maybe she doesn't see the value in some of that. Is this your first marriage? Both of you? Yes. Yeah. How old are you guys? I'm 24, she's 25. How long you been married?
Starting point is 00:54:35 Just over two years. Good, okay, perfect. I have a feeling it's probably not so much about her not wanting to do this. It might be the way it's being approached. How are, what's a conversation sound like? Let's role play. I'll pretend I'm her and you come to me
Starting point is 00:54:54 how you've been coming to her. So I guess I would just ask her and say. I just, let me set you up. I I'm making dinner. I bought groceries today and I went over the budget again. What do you do? So I guess I just, I just tell her like, um, like mathematically, like bringing our values and goals together makes more sense to both be working on something.
Starting point is 00:55:28 What do you do for a living? I'm a pilot. Yeah, I thought so. Okay. You're wonderful. Analytical. You are what I call a super nerd. You are going to be so rich if you learn how to talk to your wife.
Starting point is 00:55:47 But your mind works only on math and on details. You are a detail fiend. You've done spreadsheets at 1 a.m. when you couldn't sleep because you think they're fun. Spreadsheets work spreadsheets. I love it. You're really going to do well. Can I say something? Sure. Am I wrong? Maybe you're right.
Starting point is 00:56:10 So so I know you guys are completely against that. And I think so I was in high school when I first heard about you guys, I guess it's 2017 2018. And some of the people that I've been influenced by, they like, they're multimillionaires, they recommend when it comes to business. And I kind of like when you guys talk about like psychology and, you know, behaviorism, it's not about always a math, it's about financial peace. And so I feel like I'm at crossroads with that. I guess my wife actually is totally
Starting point is 00:56:47 More on board without no debt, but she's also not into investments even even considering the way you approach it sure Very few I would be into it the way you approach it. You would have turned my wife off though. I can tell you that Because because I did doing the same kind of crap you're doing so Yeah, it doesn't it doesn't work. So here's the thing. She feels like that she, you don't want to, it's not your intention because you're not this person, but she feels like she's being preached at by you. And she thinks if she goes along with you that you guys are going to live in a cave, collect lint and never come out except on triple coupon Thursday. That's how she feels.
Starting point is 00:57:36 She's afraid if she goes along with you she is giving up life on the planet as any normal human being knows it because you're going to save everything. And every time she gets her nails done, she's going to get ashamed. That's how she feels. I'm not saying you're that guy, but that's the vibe you're putting off to Jade and me. I think for you, if you can talk to her in pictures instead of numbers, it would go a long, long way. And I want her to understand her vote counts equal to yours.
Starting point is 00:58:07 You do not have a superior vote because you have a superior math skill. You only get one vote. She gets the other one. In case of a tie, you lose. True. She's got to get this message that her voice is being heard. So honey, when we sit down and do a budget, if you don't have enough fun in there and you don't have enough facials in there, that's going to be your fault because you have a
Starting point is 00:58:37 vote. And I want us to agree on our long-term goals. Our long-term goal is to build wealth. Our long-term goal is to build wealth. Our long-term goal is to avoid debt. Our long-term goal is to work together because the families that do that have the most successful marriages and statistically have the highest probability
Starting point is 00:58:57 of becoming millionaires. 80% of the millionaires that we have studied, and we studied over 10,000 of them, said they worked together with their spouse combined and in sync, and not one of them doing what the other one was told. They're not doing what they told. They were not a handmaiden, or they were not a husband that didn't have a brain, and his mommy took care of him in the form of a wife. These were two like grownups and crap that worked together. And you get together with her,
Starting point is 00:59:29 but all she's hearing is she knows your nerd tendencies. And I gotta tell you, she's real proud of that when you land an airplane safely. I'm real proud of that when you land an airplane safely, by the way. And so that's what allows you to do that, is all these nerd tendencies. These are the nerd tendencies. One of my good friends is a pilot. He went out for a flight
Starting point is 00:59:48 last Saturday and he was doing the aircraft. It was a little small plane, but it wasn't airworthy. And he walked away because he's a super nerd. There's no chance. All that was missing was the gas cap. They could have put a gas cap on it. He walked away and went back home. That's my kind of guy. That's my kind of pilot. These are the pilots that don't wreck airplanes, okay? Thank you. I thank you for who you are. But you've got to, this is more of a collaboration than it is a flight plan. And if you can get her to hear that vibe off of you instead of this super nerd vibe, then you guys can work together.
Starting point is 01:00:29 And it took a while because the first seven years of our 43 year marriage, my wife will tell you that her vote didn't count. I didn't tell her it didn't count. I just got a big personality and did whatever the flip I wanted to do. And she just went along with it. Whatever you wanna do, honey, which is Southern for you're doing it wrong.
Starting point is 01:00:47 That's passive aggressive is what that is. And so, yeah, whatever you wanna do, honey. Yeah, right. I'm gonna tell you later that that was stupid, but right now, you just do whatever you wanna do. And that's the first seven years of our marriage, because super nerd here had it all figured out. And I wrecked the plane in my case.
Starting point is 01:01:04 So keeping the metaphor alive here. because super nerd here had it all figured out and I wrecked the plane in my case. Yeah, yeah. So keeping the metaphor alive here. But yeah, so Josh, I think you're going to do very, very well. You're smart and you're not smart. You're wise for asking the question. That tells me you know that there's a relational problem you don't know how to solve and it's not a math problem. And that's brilliant on your part because that's going to problem you don't know how to solve and it's not a math problem. Yeah. And that's brilliant on your part
Starting point is 01:01:26 because that's gonna lead you to wealth. Yeah, I think that's good. I think a good question in those situations. Hey, talk more about talking in pictures and not words. I stepped on you when you said that. That's all right, that's all right. I'm thinking about that. I'm thinking there's something that she's seeing you do,
Starting point is 01:01:41 like you said, that's just boring, boring, boring. And you're talking about numbers and math and what we can have numbers-wise. But a better way to talk about is, what does the future look like? What does the future look like to you, dear? And she can paint that picture. And I think that's a lot clear.
Starting point is 01:01:58 I know for Sam and I, one of the clear pictures I had in my head that was a motivator was, I had this vision of taking my kids to school and dropping them off and being there when they were at a school. That's a picture. It's a picture. And that means you gotta be able to not work all the time.
Starting point is 01:02:13 Right, and how do you work backwards from that? So maybe take her on a date and say, tell me what your picture of the future looks like. What do you picture when you think about us being successful? What do you picture? And really, that's your homework, is to really keep it in pictures. Don't mention numbers a single time.
Starting point is 01:02:29 Ask her what she pictures when she pictures a peaceful lifestyle, peace financially. And then you can get to know her a little bit better in that way, and then... Let's have a dream date and do it in high definition. High def. HD, HD, let's get into details. And oh, by the way, Josh, you're not doing much talking at this. That's right, lots of listening. Doing's get into details. And oh by the way Josh, you're not
Starting point is 01:02:45 doing much talking at this. That's right. A lot of listening. A lot of listening. And just asking clarifying questions. That's your max. Yeah, lots of questions. And they're not passive aggressive questions. You're like, you're crazy? That's not a question. And so, you know, but yeah, just ask clarifying questions. And then, you know, what if we got, what if I got a $10 million signing bonus? What does our life look like? And ask her what her spending love language is. Ask her that.
Starting point is 01:03:11 That's a good one. What's yours? Probably convenience or like self care. Oh, okay, I got you. Okay, all right. I know what mine and Rachel's is, experiences. Experiences, yep. This is the Ramsey Show.
Starting point is 01:03:42 All right, Dave, you have some strong opinions. Possibly, yeah. I think so. Okay, because you really prefer credit unions over big banks. Well, credit unions, for one thing, are non-profit, which means that the members, the customers, own the credit union. So any profits that the credit union makes goes back into customer pricing. So you get better interest rate on savings,
Starting point is 01:04:09 cheaper checking, and so on, that kind of thing. And what's more important than that though is the fact that the customer is the owner changes the spirit on the credit union. So I find very few credit unions that aren't very customer-centric. Well, and I think we have found one that is incredible, and that's Fairwinds.
Starting point is 01:04:25 They are an incredible credit union that is really out with the heart to help the customer. They're the right kind of people with the right kind of values. And they've done a really, really good job with customer service. And the deals that they're offering, the Ramsey Tribe, is incredible. Yeah, absolutely. And I love it. The things that we teach, they so line up with. And you're right, their customer service is unbelievable. Winston and love it. The things that we teach they so line up with. And you're right, their customer service is unbelievable.
Starting point is 01:04:49 Winston and I just signed up and we got an account. And I'm not kidding, it took less than five minutes. It was so user friendly. The step-by-step approach was unbelievable. And then the next day my phone rings and it says, fair wins on my phone. So I answered it and talked to someone there and they said, yeah, they give calls to every new customer.
Starting point is 01:05:05 And so again, they just really care about your experience and I so, so appreciate that. Plus anything that you can do at a traditional branch, you can do with them at fairwinds.org or on their app. And you'll have free access to over 33,000 ATMs. Hey, you guys know how much I hate banks in general. And so for me to do this is a big deal. Talk to our friends at Fair Wins and check out the combined checking and savings bundle
Starting point is 01:05:30 that they created just for the Ramsey Tribe. You guys, it's incredible. Yeah, you guys, it's so easy to join Fair Wins no matter where you live. So go to fairwins.org slash Ramsey. Fair Wins is federally insured by NCUA. Justin and Casey are on the debt-free stage in the lobby of Ramsey Solutions. Hey guys, how are you? We're fantastic. Thank you for having us. We're honored to have you. Where do y'all live? St. Louis, Missouri.
Starting point is 01:06:11 Alright, fun. Welcome to Nashville. And how much debt have you two paid? $181,000. Love it. How long did that take? 24 months. Good for you. And the range of income during that two years? Yeah, that was about $1000, then down to 120,000 and back up to 230,000. Wow. Yeah. Nice jump. What do you all do for a living? I work in the fertility field. So I'm make IVF babies. Wow. Yeah, very cool. Yeah. Yeah, I'm a car salesman. All right. And so one of you was unemployed for a hot minute.
Starting point is 01:06:44 No, I was selling cars andman. All right. And so one of you was unemployed for a hot minute? No, I was selling cars and then tried to make a career change and went down in income in case he wasn't too happy about it. I warned him. Warned me. And then about five months later, I went back to car sales at my job. And the other money that we kind of added, the side hustle,
Starting point is 01:07:04 I started landscaping. Oh. And because I did that before I sold cars. So the first little bit, I had a 15 Subaru. I was putting mulch bags on the top of the car, doing, put my name up in the, our Webster Groves community page. It's our town's Facebook page and it was a honey hole.
Starting point is 01:07:22 And then I work at a car dealership. So we got married in 21 Didn't combine our finances until April of 23 just you know and when we kind of hopped on that it was incredible and April of 23 to April of 25 and you know knocked it out We what kind of debt was the 180? student loans credit cards and knocked it out. What kind of debt was the 180? Student loans, credit cards, our first year marriage we owed almost $10,000 to the government
Starting point is 01:07:51 and that's it. Student loans, two cars, a Peloton. Gotta have the Peloton. Yeah, the Peloton Tread. A clothes hanger, okay. Yeah, right. Clothes rack. and Yeah, right, yeah, I bought a I bought a truck in 2024 and it really ramped everything up in in May of 24, so I was making
Starting point is 01:08:16 About in 2024 I made about 28 grand on the side hustle than 32 Mm-hmm and 25 on top of the car sales and I was working seven days a week for two years Rain or shine she cooked every breakfast lunch and dinner for two years Just absolutely battled together and we're gazelle intense and just you know after work Thursday So women the stories running together. What was the moment? Yeah, where you said, okay enough. I'm calling BS This has got to change. We were probably right around that April in 2023, we owed eight grand to the IRS and I just hated being normal.
Starting point is 01:08:55 I felt like so average, so ridiculous. Making too much money to be this broke. Yes, exactly. Had a good life, we were married, but just so stagnant in how we felt and you know none of the materialistic things made us happy and we got so close to each other during this process and The how'd you find this? How'd you find Ramsey? My brother Jay and his wife were doing it and they did it as well. We were definitely being Daveyish We're like, yeah, we don't we're not gonna do it just like that. We'll do it our way
Starting point is 01:09:24 Didn't work. So Jay told us about that and we did um We bought the FPU class and we watched the first two episodes and that's what really brought her around yeah, once we saw episode 2 it light switch for her and combining the finances and Just incredibly Casey Casey. what was it about that? What was the message in that that you heard? So like he said, he was probably working on me
Starting point is 01:09:50 a good three months before I was just, and I- And you know, he's a car salesman, so he's trying to sell you. Oh, I know, I know. But just, I just remember watching George up on stage talking about the debt-free snowball and just something clicked in my head just drowning a student loan debt you know $900 payments each month it just seemed impossible and just George made it sound
Starting point is 01:10:15 possible yes yes exactly yes yeah and it went once that switch went off and I felt that it was like I can't explain it it's just such a surreal feeling and yeah the budget is like a superpower I mean I don't know how every human being doesn't use a budget yeah after finding the every dollar app and yeah you know it's just a game-changer yeah probably you guys thank you we have been through a lot and just a couple of years of marriage. Yes, yep. It's so silly looking back at it and we could have started this four or five years ago
Starting point is 01:10:50 but we're really glad that we did it when we did and our relationship has just changed so much. It's just amazing and we just thank you guys so much and we're just so appreciative of everything. What was the hardest part? Maybe not eating out. We didn't eat out for two years, except if we got gift cards.
Starting point is 01:11:09 So that was hard, and then we didn't see each other much because I was working and she was just making all the meals. I tried, I tried to go to some side jobs, and we learned quick that it's best if I leave the landscaping to him. We became a great cook though, didn't we? Yes, and we learned really quick to leave him at home and not take him grocery shopping
Starting point is 01:11:29 because I just got out of control. Started shopping at Aldi, saved so much money doing that and now I'm an Aldi girl. Really worked that budget down to get the margin. That's what really clicked is just get that thing tight and then every penny other than that goes to You know goes to the debt and now goes to anything we want, you know and investing and all the good stuff and we just really feel like
Starting point is 01:11:57 Because of this we can do anything together. It's like winning the Stanley Cup, you know You battle you battle all year and then you win that. Now you want to win more championships and just more good experiences together. It's just only up from here and we're just so excited. What would you say to the couples? Cause you know, folks call in here all the time and they struggle to combine their money. I mean, you even said the first couple years
Starting point is 01:12:17 you didn't have it together. So what does that look like and why is it worth it? It's scary. I mean, to think about it at first cause you're so set in your ways, like, no, this is my money that I earned, and same with him, but once, you know, combining it, it was just looking back, it's so silly,
Starting point is 01:12:33 why didn't we do this? Trust each other, you know, trust each other, and... Communication. Yeah, communicate, and like you say, why? Like, where do we see ourselves in a couple years, and if we see yourself there, what does it ourselves in a couple years and if we're if we see Yourself there. What does it take? It takes Communication and being together on it. You can't be together with money going different ways, you know different places
Starting point is 01:12:52 You all got to know You know where it's going Have any trouble with both of you having a vote? No, no, no, we've always been you know, even when we combine finances it was just because we hadn't thought of it before, you know You know, we didn't hear a show where you guys said to do it this I run, you know ironically So once I said, hey, let's do it. She's like, yeah sure no problem It just was doing you know, just never thought of it just never thought of doing it And then the efficiency goes way up. Yeah, you're at streamlines it like you said and it just you find more money. Yeah, it's
Starting point is 01:13:24 it's incredible and just feel more of a team Well, you get a momentum of both of your efforts going towards one shared goal. Exactly. Absolutely Exactly proud of you guys. Thank you. Well done. Thank you. Okay, you didn't eat out for two years Yeah, who made fun of you? Oh gosh everybody years, who made fun of you? Oh gosh, everybody. Yeah, yeah. Everybody. We had a lot of supporters as well, but a lot of people.
Starting point is 01:13:49 You got to sing a Toby Keith song now, how you like me now. Yeah, exactly. What was that debt-free meal that you won't eat anymore? Oh my gosh. We used to have this thing for lunch, like this porridge thing, ground beef. Toggle bowls probably. Basically, ground beef and rice is what I eat every day for lunch and this. No more ground beef. I'm done. I like it. I want beef bowls. Yeah, I want beef bowls.
Starting point is 01:14:06 I'm so proud of you. Well done, guys. Thank you so much. Justin and Casey St. Louis, Missouri. $181,000 paid off in 24 months. What would you do to pay off $181,000? I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000.
Starting point is 01:14:14 I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000.
Starting point is 01:14:22 I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000. I would pay off $181,000 paid off in 24 months. What would you do to pay off $180,000? Would you not eat out for two years? Rice and beef rolls. To pay off to do rice and beef? That's kind of like rice and beans.
Starting point is 01:14:39 $181,000 paid off making $170,000 to $120,000 to $230,000. They worked their butts off. They lived sacrificially they work together They stayed on the budget using the every dollar app. They did the whole thing They did it their debt free and they got the rest of their lives to become millionaires and multi millionaires Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream three two one We're Debt Free!
Starting point is 01:15:02 Yeah! Absolutely! What would you give to work with your husband, to work with your wife in unity like that? Oh, it's a choice, darlin'. It's a choice. As an investor and a person of faith, when your mutual funds and ETFs put your money into the dark side, you might feel a disturbance. Good news, Timothy Plan offers investments for people who want to be intentional about where their money goes.
Starting point is 01:16:01 As a pioneering force in biblically responsible investing, Timothy Plan entered the investment space to offer clean alternatives to secular funds that invest in stuff you'd never willingly expose your family to. And for more than 30 years, Timothy Plan has offered mutual funds and ETFs that won't contradict your values or sabotage your faith. So if you're serious about investing with a clear conscience, Timothy Plan could be just what you're searching for. Contact your financial advisor today to see if Timothy Plan is right for you. Or visit TimothyPlan.com for more information.
Starting point is 01:16:32 Investing includes risk, including possible loss of principal. Before investing, carefully consider a fund's investment objective, risks, charges, and expenses contained in the prospectus available at TimothyPlan.com. Read carefully before investing. Mutual funds distributed by Timothy Partners LTD and ETFs distributed by Four Side Fund Services LLC. ["The Rhyme of the Night"] Shelby is in Nashville.
Starting point is 01:17:04 Hi Shelby, welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hi, thanks for taking my call. My question is brief. I'm trying to figure out whether the person I'm dating is actually a scam artist or not with crypto. So backstory, we started talking about a month ago and he has way more money than I do I'm on baby step three so I'm trying to save up for my six month emergency fund but he's trying to get me to cash out my 401k to I guess fund crypto because he
Starting point is 01:17:37 said he has this I guess plan that he's been working for about three years and he said to have the 90 percent like money back. And what does that sound like to you? I mean, you're calling us. What are you thinking? It sounds pretty sketchy. Yeah, it does. But when I've tried to talk to him about it, it's, sorry, he keeps throwing it back.
Starting point is 01:18:03 Like if I'm making a wrong decision and it's really stressing me out. And I've tried talking to him about it, but he just keeps coming back with that I'm not making good financial choices. He's trying to, it sounds like he's really manipulating you here. Yeah. I mean all this emotion. Listen to this emotion. I think you've got good instincts. You want to know what I think? Shelby, I think when something doesn't feel right, it's not right. Like, I think when you get that feeling in the pit of your stomach. You know why it smells bad? Because it stinks. Yeah. And it was enough to make you call. It was enough to make you call a radio show. How old are you?
Starting point is 01:18:47 I'm 37 years old. Yeah, when did you leave the last bad relationship? Two and a half years ago toxic Very much. Yeah, okay And so you were just really really wishing this one wasn't Right until it until it until it was Okay. And so you were just really, really wishing this one wasn't. Right. Until it was. That's part of what makes you cry. It's not just him. It's just you just wanted this one to be okay and it's not. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:18 Because here's the thing, even if the advice was good, the process he's using on his girlfriend is toxic. Would you agree with that? Yes. The shaming and the gaslighting? Yeah. Yeah, for sure. And so I'm not sure if he's an idiot or a con man, but I am sure he's one of the two. Yeah. A hundred percent.
Starting point is 01:19:48 Anyone that tries to tell their someone that they love to cash out their 401k and put it in a crypto buy that has a 90% probability is either an idiot or a con man because there's no such thing. Even the people that are legitimately doing crypto would tell you that those numbers just don't work. You don't put your 401k money in crypto. Even if you believe in crypto, you don't do that. And you don't have a 90% play,
Starting point is 01:20:20 even if you believe in crypto. And anybody that believes that is either an idiot or a con man because the numbers don't justify that the market doesn't justify that there is no such thing okay and I'm not sure which one he is but I can tell you this my friend Shelby who I love doesn't need to be dating a guy who's an idiot or con man and he's one of the two you're done.
Starting point is 01:20:47 I'm sorry. I have one last question. I'm sorry. Was that too mean? No. No. Did that kind of ring inside of you like I just touched the truth? Yeah. I just needed someone else's perspective from outside to tell me what I would do. Grandpa Dad would box this guy's ears if he's trying to date my granddaughter. I'd run him off with something that was loaded. Do you think it would be too mean if I just kind of ghosted him? I don't really care what you do. There's 50 ways to leave your lover. You can do whatever you want. I don't really care what you do. There's 50 ways to leave your lover.
Starting point is 01:21:25 You can do whatever you want. I don't care. You've only known him for a month, didn't you say? Where did you meet online? Yes. You know what? I've decided, you can just send him a text or you can send him an email or you can call him.
Starting point is 01:21:39 I don't care. And just say, I've decided that this is not working for me. I have a good life. Mm-hmm. And end of story, end of con, no conversation. We're not going to talk about crypto. We're not going to talk about con man. Now I will tell you just an added commentary just for the fun. Does that does that all sound right to you or did you think we were going to tell you something else? No, I was kind of hoping that you would just set me straight because...
Starting point is 01:22:02 I'm not setting you straight, I'm setting him straight. You deserve some love. This guy needs to be set straight, not you. I'm just agreeing with what your brain was already telling you. Yeah. I guess I just needed to hear it from someone else. Yeah. Now, here's the deal.
Starting point is 01:22:21 I've been walking around a long, long time, and I have gotten conned a lot more by enthusiastic ignoramuses than I have by con men. There's a lot more people who are enthusiastically stupid, including me at times, than there are actual con men. That's why I can't tell what this guy is, and I really don't care. Either one is dangerous. An enthusiastic ignoramus will get you in as much trouble as Bernie Madoff. Okay? And so I don't care if he's an enthusiastic fool or if he is an actual con man. He's got some of the badges of con man. There's a lot of the signals here. I don't run into this very often but a lot of the signal a lot of the signals here I don't run into this very often but a lot of the signals are here can I just ask have you seen him in real life or is this all online oh well it's mostly online I've
Starting point is 01:23:15 been trying to meet him in person that's that you've never met him in person that's the con man part well wait you've never met him in person? That's right. Can you spell catfish? Yeah. Not really enough. No, I can't. But yeah, just because I'm a single mom and my schedule just doesn't match, we haven't had a chance to meet. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:23:36 He doesn't exist, darling. He's not even real. This is a con. There's not even a person over there. There's a boiler room working you. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. This is completely a con. I'm sorry. Good catch! I just had a feeling. I went for the old guy that was just dumb, and you got it.
Starting point is 01:23:54 Now, this is a boiler room in Russia. Yeah, this is... They're trying to get your money. It's a Nigerian prince. You are getting worked, kiddo. This is a romance job. Oh, man. Yeah. Wow. He doesn a romance job. Oh man. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:24:06 Wow, he doesn't even exist. That's even worse. Well, that's how those crypto schemes are. My last boyfriend didn't exist. I'm trying to get a real one this time. Okay, that's your next boy. That's how these crypto things are. You meet online and then they start trolling
Starting point is 01:24:20 and next thing you know, you're talking about money. Well, a lonely person is a target for sure. Sometimes it's old people, sometimes it's somebody fresh off a breakup. That's why I asked about the former relationship. Fresh off a breakup, you're vulnerable. Wow. It's tough.
Starting point is 01:24:38 You gotta meet people, you gotta see people in person. Oh, you don't have a boyfriend, honey. You have a boiler room. There's eight people on the other end typing these things out and occasionally they put a male voice with it from AI. Wow, you are, yeah, that was gone completely. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:24:57 I changed my answer. You don't even, yes, you need to just ghost them. Yeah, just ghost them. I got a thing on my text the other day that was a spam text, and it said, you have an unpaid Tennessee traffic ticket. DMV, yes, me too. Yeah, they're going crazy with it right now. You got it too?
Starting point is 01:25:14 Yeah, I got it. And you got it too, everybody, everybody in the audience is getting them. This is so great. It was pretty well written, actually. Yeah, it is, until you look at the email. The email, yes. And it was from ElvisFan.com.
Starting point is 01:25:27 And so I just sent it back. I couldn't resist. Instead of just hitting it, spam, and go, you know, delete and all this stuff, I just sent it back, ElvisFan, good luck with your con. That's hilarious. And just sent it back. And yeah, but it is very well written. Yeah, that was one of the best ones I've seen, I have to say.
Starting point is 01:25:43 What gave it away, yeah. The number, the email on the number is what gave it away. The phone number, yeah. It was something 8575 at Elvisfan.com. Yeah, help me Lord. Poor Elvis. He gets drug into everything. He does. Maybe he's not really dead.
Starting point is 01:26:01 There's always a sighting. There's always a sighting. I like Bigfoot. That's right. And her boyfriend, yeah. Yeah. Jade, that's a good catch! Well, I didn't want to say it, but man, I was thinking it.
Starting point is 01:26:13 You got that! You completely nailed it! I already felt bad because she was heartbroken. I didn't want to make it worse by letting her know it wasn't even a real guy. Oh man, I'm glad you did. Does it help me? Cause I'm so naive. How many of you out there are naive? Oh my God. That's wild.
Starting point is 01:26:30 Catfish for sure. Wow. Wow. You don't get that on other shows. Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's the Ramsey Show where we help people build wealth, do work that they love and create actual amazing relationships. Jade Walshaw, number one bestselling author, Ramsey personality, she's my co-host today. Destiny is in Orlando, Florida. Hi Destiny, how are you?
Starting point is 01:27:30 Hi, good afternoon. Thank you for taking my call. Sure, what's up? My question is trying to navigate debt as a single mom on a part-time job. Part-time job when I'm door-dashing currently And I have a little one-year-old boy who has come with a lot of medical Debt as well as me trying to consolidate my own debt and I'm currently living in a DV shelter Trying to navigate our way out
Starting point is 01:28:04 You're living in a what shelter a domestic violence shelter. Okay. Wow. How old are you, hon? I'm 24. Okay. All right. And how much debt do you have personally? Collectively about 18,000. That includes his medical debt? Yeah. Okay. And what was this precious boy born with? What's he struggling with? A number of things. So he was born with left heart syndrome, and part of his heart was not developed correctly. He had several surgeries to take care of it. Meanwhile, now that he's on the up curve and he's seeing a lot of his milestones being hit, we're trying to get him into speech. He's one, he's turning two
Starting point is 01:28:56 in September here, and we're getting into speech and they possibly think he may have autism spectrum disorder. So I have a lot of, um, extra doctors. I need to bring him to like, um, the speech therapist and the behavioral therapist. Um, on top of being a single mom, um, I'm trying to navigate his schedule. As long as keeping a job, I did get... I had a way better job before. I'm door-dashing now, but back in January, I was released from my other job, a patient advocacy job for people who have cancer, to help them get their medication cheaper. But the job was terminated because I had a lot of
Starting point is 01:29:42 hospital stays with my son. And my life kind of far stays with my son. But his hospital stays, thank goodness, it sounds like you said he's curving up and hitting his milestones. So a lot of those issues are now behind you. You just got to face the speech and a possible, not necessarily probable, autism thing that's in the offing here. We don't know for sure. Be careful getting sucked into that world. Let's first take care of what's right in front of us. And that's taking care of him and his speech and he's one years old.
Starting point is 01:30:17 Okay, so if I'm in your shoes my first job is to create a stable home situation, not get out of that. My first job is to get an apartment and get a full-time job and create a manageable situation with him and your schedule. And that's a challenge. Those two things right there, that's a big ask. A full career and an apartment. You've obviously got a car.
Starting point is 01:30:57 Okay, I don't care about the $18,000. They can't get anything from you, darling. You don't have anything. Exactly. You're safe right now. And they're about a anything from you darling. You don't have anything Exactly you're safe right now. They're not gonna get your car. Did you say repo your car? Yeah, I'm about a thousand dollars behind me. Okay, they will do that Okay, we've got to get that current Well, we got to get the car current and get it paid off and get you in an apartment and that's going to require more income and a stable thing. Do you have family in the area that's trustworthy?
Starting point is 01:31:31 Not trustworthy. They're helping me. My mom is helping me a bit, but it's more of a catch-22 situation. She's having him while I doordash through the day, but she also at the same point He's starting him in daycare that is quite It's an expensive area. So it's hard for me to to manage because she's also working So she she takes over night while I'm door dashing and I'm putting him through daycare during the day And it's about $175 a week on top of a $264 day and it's about $175 a week on top of a $264 car payment that I pay every two weeks. Yeah, that's not helpful.
Starting point is 01:32:09 And so we haven't got any help. We haven't got any help yet. I'm still trying to get you some help. Okay, are you plugged into a good church there? No. Okay. All right, we're going to hook you up with some pastors and some church congregations in the area that we know and see if we can
Starting point is 01:32:25 get some folks to come around you and walk with you while you're doing this, because you've got to have some support right now. And your support, because you obviously don't need to return to the situation you've escaped from, that's completely in the rear view mirror. Say I promise. Yeah. Yeah. The situation is in your rear view mirror. You're never going back.
Starting point is 01:32:48 Say, I promise Dave. I promise Dave. Trust me. That boy does not deserve to see that. That boy and you do not deserve that. That's why you're in the shelter, okay? And so you are a warrior and you've lost a few battles and you're gonna keep fighting princess. You're a warrior princess you've lost a few battles and you're going to keep fighting, Princess. You're a warrior, Princess. You're going to do this. I've got faith in you and we're going to put some people around you to help you. I'm also going to get one of our Ramsey coaches that are financial coaches to help you as well.
Starting point is 01:33:18 But your deal is don't worry about the debt. We do need to worry about the $1,000 on the car. We've got to get that straightened out and I'm going to help you with that, okay? We're going to get the coaches to help you work that out and we're going to get you with a church and see if maybe they'll catch your car up, okay? And help you get into the apartment and bring some people around you to love you well. And so we're going to put some community around you and we're going to put a coach in your corner. We're going to pay for all of it and cost you a thing, okay? And then because that you've got to get a full-time gig going for your long-term future.
Starting point is 01:33:49 I know it's hard to see that right now, but you've got to have some money and DoorDash doesn't cut it. And you've got to get it, and that'll get you out of the shelter and get you in an apartment, get the car caught up. See, if you were in an apartment with food on the table and the lights and the water were paid and the car was current and you had a schedule set up for your son, you would have a real life, agreed? Only then do we worry about the stat.
Starting point is 01:34:16 First we take care of you and the boy. Yeah, it's like I said, it's been a catch-22 for quite a bit. No, yeah, you're stuck. You're stuck between a rock and a hard place. That's where you are. So you gotta have some help to get unstuck. And we're gonna help you, okay? Thank you so much.
Starting point is 01:34:37 Alright. Any last words? Yeah, you said she was a warrior princess and I feel the same way. I feel like kudos to you for doing everything you can to take care of yourself and take care of your boy and this is a really hard season. But it's not forever. It's just a season. How old are you?
Starting point is 01:34:55 I'm 24. Yeah. 18 years from now and it's May. You're going to walk him. You're going to be standing there when he walks down and gets his high school diploma and is getting ready to head off to college and you're paying for it and you're going to walk him. You're going to be standing there when he walks down and gets his high school diploma and is getting ready to head off to college and you're paying for it. You're going to be smiling. That's the picture you're working towards, okay?
Starting point is 01:35:11 Hopefully, you meant. No, it's not hopefully. You're going to do it. You'll do it. We're going to show you how. Hold on. Guys, set her up with a good shirt. Get a couple of guys' shirts department to hold her hand and hook her up with one of
Starting point is 01:35:23 our coaches down there. They can help with that as well. This is the Ramsey Shop. You work your butt off for your money, but your money's never going to return the favor if all you do is hope for the best. If you're ready to learn how to make your money work for you, check out the SmartVestor program. SmartVestor can help you find advisors who specialize in retirement planning, charitable giving, advanced investing strategies, and more.
Starting point is 01:36:13 Whatever your goals, your pro will take the time to explain your options so you never have to invest in anything you don't understand. Head to ramsysolutions.com slash smart vester to get connected. Ramsey solutions is a paid non-client promoter of participating pros. Learn more at ramsysolutions.com slash smart vester. She ever found yourself trying to explain this whole Ramsey show thing or the baby steps to someone who's really struggling with money but there's a lot to get across in one conversation? Well we put together something to help you.
Starting point is 01:36:54 It's called the Ramsey 101 playlist. Free easy to share playlist. Covers all the basics for somebody who's just brand new with Ramsey. What are the baby steps? How to pay off debt with the debt snowball? How to build an emergency fund? And a lot more. There's clips on all this. So click the link at the top of the show notes to open the Ramsey 101 playlist on YouTube. Text it,
Starting point is 01:37:18 DM it, send it in a group chat, just say hey thought this might help. If you're listening on radio we've got the playlist featured at the top of our YouTube channel. So, think of one person in your life and remember that one share could change everything for them. And by the way, if you send that,
Starting point is 01:37:36 don't send it with a condemnation message. That's right. No shaming. You need this, this is for you. No shaming. You are broke, you should listen to this. That's not what we're talking about. It's like, this helped me. That's right. Maybe you would be interested. That's right. That's all you say say talk about your experience Not how dumb they are that never works buying or selling a home is a big deal in between clickbait headlines and confusing data
Starting point is 01:37:57 It's tough to know what's actually going on in the housing market And we're here to make the latest trends easy to understand By the way home prices went up just a little bit last month. Now the median home price in America is $430,000 and there's more homes on the market right now. Nearly a million, the highest since 2019. Galato inventory. The average 15 year fixed rate rose to $5.9 last month. It's still not six. So it's a good time to buy and a good time to sell. If you need more help and you want to learn more about it, you want to just go to ramsysolutions.com slash market or click the link in the show
Starting point is 01:38:33 notes for that and we'll help you out with that as well. Colin is in Phoenix. Hi Colin, welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hi Dave, hi Jade, how you guys doing? Doing great. Better than we deserve, what's up in your world? I could, I mean I'm doing alright, I'm about to move across the country so I mean it could be better, it's always stressful, but I got a quick question for you guys. Should my girlfriend take out student loans for grad school because it seems like it would be a simpler transaction than dealing with her parents. No is the answer to the first question. What does it mean to deal with her parents?
Starting point is 01:39:14 Like borrow the money from her parents? So that's where it gets dicey. Generally speaking, I'm going to say no. I'm full with you guys. And my parents have always been in a position to help cash flow school for me. And that's what happened for my undergrad. And they're going to be doing that for me for my grad school as well. So I mean, I'm obviously thankful for that. And my girlfriend was told to take out student loans for her undergrad. And that's a financial burden now. And this was before she effectively discovered you guys. She'd heard of you
Starting point is 01:39:52 guys. And I mean, when she grew up, it wasn't as big of a as big of a thing. And then I came into her life. And now we're kind of doing this. And I was like, you need to save some money while we're not having to pay student loans and now that they're, you know, they're coming, she's paying really aggressively like over two times the amount that is minimum. How much does she have? She has, it's just hit 19. She just paid off the smallest.
Starting point is 01:40:19 And how much does grad school cost? So grad school is going to cost us less than undergrad overall. There's not an us, you're not married, it costs her. Right, that's true. It does cost her. What will it cost her? I'm going to say it's going to cost 75. What in the world is she studying? So it's interesting, we're both studying in
Starting point is 01:40:48 the same field, just different emphasis. Okay. I'm going in to stage automation and she's doing costume design. You don't need a graduate degree in costume design. So, no. Is not a private school? Is it a private school? Where are you guys getting these degrees? It's not a private school, but it's not federally funded. It's state funded. All right.
Starting point is 01:41:16 Yeah, it's too expensive. So part of the conversation, let's back it up because I gave you a quick no about the student loans, but I want wanna kind of talk about the things that should inform the decision going forward, because it sounds like, to your point, it sounds like her parents obviously did not plan to pay for undergrad or grad, and so she's gotta look at what her options are.
Starting point is 01:41:37 And the number one thing that's gonna impact the school that she chooses is the price of the school, right? Because she doesn't have any money, so she's gotta choose. Let's put the design thing aside for a second costume design aside just for a second. If she chooses a school, she's got to choose something that there's a way in a path forward in which she could pay for it by working by saving by even maybe delaying it a year so
Starting point is 01:41:59 she can stack up some money to make that happen. Is that fair enough? Yeah, and we've we we talked about those options. The difficulty is regardless, we do have to leave where we are now because in our city, there's virtually no options in our direct field. That's that's where I want to that's where I want to interject because I think I think I'm not trying to be think, I'm not trying to be rude, I'm not trying to step on your feet,
Starting point is 01:42:27 you have a relationship. I think part of the problem is it is a huge we. And so you go where she goes, she goes where you go, but she might not be able to afford to go where you go. And that's something that I think could be a good idea to decouple from this thing, because you can afford to go to that grad school because your parents are paying for it.
Starting point is 01:42:48 She can't. So you guys are loading up the truck and heading to Beverly Hills, that is. Swimming pools and movies. I mean, I guess we are. You're moving to LA, aren't you? We kinda are. You're moving to LA and she's talking about UCLA. Well, it's in North Carolina. North Carolina? Now that makes even less sense.
Starting point is 01:43:08 For costume design? You're telling me, I didn't think it was going to cost that much. No, no, wait a minute. North Carolina for costume design? Yeah. Help me understand. What do you think I mean? I think that's one of the best schools in the United States for it. Yeah, okay. I'm thinking. So, let right, let's stop a second. All right, what is her degree in currently? Both of our degrees are in theater production with design and technical production. What's she doing for a living now? She's working at the university we just graduated from,
Starting point is 01:43:40 and she's on a part-time gig because they won't hire her full-time, and she's basically doing bookkeeping Okay, so her theater degree got her a book part-time bookkeeping keeping gig so far Yeah, we have to leave where we are no there. I mean theater gigs aren't huge in North Carolina Right True true Right. Well, true. That is true. It's not exactly a huge market. You're not moving to the theater market. I mean, we're
Starting point is 01:44:09 talking LA, we're talking sound stages in Atlanta that have blown up, and we're talking Nashville and we're talking New York. Right. Maybe Chicago. But not North Carolina! So we're not going in for theater per se, we're going in for live entertainment and the reason Even worse. The reason this school is as important to us as we believe it to be is because everyone there
Starting point is 01:44:40 they have created effectively a pipeline to the large organizations that we want to work large organizations that we want to work for, that we've dreamed to work for for our entire lives, and currently we are unable to get those jobs because of where we started. And that's what we should do. Okay. Jade and Sam own a cruise talent booking company. They book people and have for years on Cruise Talent. So she can
Starting point is 01:45:06 speak to this better than me, but I'm calling bull crap. Yeah. There's, it doesn't exist this idea that if I go to this school, I 100% have the in, and I 100% will be in. Networking exists, I will give you that. Networking exists, forming relationships exists, but you can do that. There, forming relationships exists, but you can do that. There's a lot of that that you can do on your own because now you've admittedly said it's not about the education. It's about the network. It's about the pipeline. It's about getting indoors. Right. You said that. Right. And my thing is if you move to a town, one of these towns that Dave said,
Starting point is 01:45:41 and you make it a point to get out there, you go to every live show, you go to every play, you, you know, sign up, you just go backstage, you can start meeting people. You can, in six months, create that same network, but you've gotta do work. Like, that's you going out every single night. That's you talking to every single person
Starting point is 01:45:59 that you meet at these events. I think this is her parents saying, this is a bad idea for her. It's a bad idea. I think this is her parents saying, this is a bad idea for her. This is a bad idea. I think I agree with her parents, Colin. No, she shouldn't do this. Education is rarely the route. I would not spend $75,000 on a graduate degree in cost-iming.
Starting point is 01:46:18 No, I would not. And I'm in a town where people make a living doing cost-iming. I've never met someone with a degree in it. Ever. Listen guys, I've heard just about every excuse for why folks think they can't get ahead with money. So let's go ahead and settle this right now. You get the final say on what happens with your money. That's why you have to start telling your money where to go so you can stop wondering where it went. So if you're gonna start winning with money you have to get on a budget. The easiest way to get started and stick to it is with the Every Dollar Budget
Starting point is 01:47:03 app. It'll help you make a plan for every single dollar coming in and every single dollar going out every single month. And guess what? It's free so no excuses. Download Every Dollar in the App Store or Google Play today. By the way, Jade and I love North Carolina. Oh yeah. We're just not of the opinion that it is a theater hotbed. It's not. Okay.
Starting point is 01:47:43 Just clarifying for all you people that are getting ready to send hate mail into a full reddit page on Dave Ramsey hates North Carolina because he doesn't. I actually love North Carolina. My state, Tennessee, used to be part of it before 1794. So there you go. But yeah, it's part of my soul. I love North Carolina, but it's not a theater hotbed. And neither is Chattanooga,
Starting point is 01:48:05 Tennessee, and neither is Louisville, Kentucky. So you can just put this on a long list of places that are not a theater hotbed. And so nothing wrong with that. It's just not there. Sorry. And just to be very, very clear, when tackling debt or building wealth, people can often forget about one important step to reaching those goals, that's insurance if you've got the right coverage That's playing good defense while you're playing offense if you got the wrong coverage. They're taking your money Don't let them take your money make sure you got the right coverage take our free that I mentioned is free coverage checkup It's a free online. It's free. It's a free online resource that creates a personalized insurance action plan and makes you know exactly for your situation what you need to do, what you need to get rid of and what you need to
Starting point is 01:48:52 get more of. Is it free? It's free. The whole thing's free. Good point, Jade. RamseySolutions.com slash checkup. That's how you get the coverage checkup or click the link in the description if you're listening on a podcast or YouTube or something like that. Oliver's in San Diego. Hey Oliver, how
Starting point is 01:49:08 are you? I'm doing great. Thanks for taking my call. Sure, what's up? So I've been a long-time listener. I even took the FPE University class five years ago, but I wanted to get your thoughts on taking advantage of a, and I know you're anti credit card, but there's a card that accepts mortgage payments and daycare payments for bills you have to pay anyway. You pay it straight through your checking account and then they give you the,
Starting point is 01:49:39 the three, 4,000 points and then you can use it, cash it out, use it for a trip or even use it for your mortgage to pay it off faster. So it gives you three thousand points? Well depending on what your mortgage payment is. What are the points to? The points you can cash out for money? Or you can cash out for cash or you can cash out for cash or you can so what is three thousand points worth in money I think it's oh yeah it's it's not a lot I think it's the one cent per point one cent per point the point so how much is your mortgage three thousand cents yeah my mortgage is about 35 but I pay my daycare and they give you three times points
Starting point is 01:50:25 on daycare. Yeah, 3,000 cents. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or let's say you add a daycare, 7,000 cents. Yes, so I pay both of those and then I just cash it in, but it's towards my mortgage. Isn't that $70? Is that right? Mm-hmm, that's right.
Starting point is 01:50:43 Yeah. Okay. So $70. Yeah, so $70 Yeah, okay. And so the here's the thing When you play with snakes You eventually will get bitten And These are snakes credit card companies have one goal and it's not to give you free money, you know that These are snakes credit card companies have one goal and it's not to give you free money. You know that
Starting point is 01:51:12 Yeah, it's to get you in debt at 18 to 38 percent. We know that there's one trillion dollars worth of people who thought they were Gonna get points and now you've converted 3,000 cents and to having a discussion about $30. What do you make a year? Between me and my wife we're doing good above every, I think around 358. You're making $350,000 a year and you called me about $30. Oh wow. You should have used your time with it better.
Starting point is 01:51:33 I could have helped you with something real, not $30. I mean really. Don't laugh, it's exactly what you called me about 30 bucks. You're burning a lot of your brain calories you called me about, 30 bucks. You're burning a lot of your brain calories that are very valuable on 30 bucks. Unless there's another reason you're not telling us. No, I was taking advantage of that card. You're not taking advantage of it.
Starting point is 01:51:57 It's already used up more of your brain calories that you should have been using to make another $10,000 while you're screwing around with 30 bucks. And now you're burning my brain calories. So here's the thing. We did study 10,167 millionaires. The number of them that said they became millionaires due to 3,000 cents is precisely zero. The number of them that became millionaires because of
Starting point is 01:52:25 their airline miles, because they manipulated a credit card company and got money out of them and used some system to their advantage that was designed to screw them, and they used that to become a millionaire is precisely zero. So the answer Oliver, as you knew before you called, because you went through Financial Peace University and I spent an entire hour trashing the whole idea and you already knew that. So no, I don't have any credit cards. I have four pieces of plastic in my wallet,
Starting point is 01:52:54 two debit cards, one on my business, one on my personal. I have my driver's license and my handgun carry permit because I live in America. And that's it, that's all I got. I got nothing else in there. I got no points, I got no points. I got zero cents Three thousand cents I can't unhear that and unthink of it that way Well, here's the thing
Starting point is 01:53:15 The way they get you with these things and the way they get you with these interest rate loan consolidation crap same thing is they Start talking about the interest rate and the savings. We start talking about savings. And see, what they did was they didn't say $30. No. Brilliant marketing. They said 3,000 points. You get 3,000 somethings.
Starting point is 01:53:34 And it takes a minute to boil it down to 3,000 somethings. You gotta go back to when you were a kid and you went to the skating rink and you got the tickets. Worse than that, Chuck E. Cheese. Chuck E. Cheese, and there was the wall of prizes prizes but you had to convert how many tickets and points? It was 80,000 tickets. You're buried in tickets and you still got a half a penny piece of plastic something from China. Right. Out of the Chuck E. Cheese wall of fame cabinets and your child is buried in tickets. They can't even see their they
Starting point is 01:54:05 look like cousin it with tickets and they're just covered in them. It's a scam. Three thousand cents. Wow. I mean that's that's a lot of sense. So no that many other ways you could get $30. If you convert some of these discussions to hard dollars they stop you from screwing with it. Yeah. Yeah they do. You make three and fifty thousand dollars a year. Don you from screwing with it. Yeah, yeah they do. You make $350,000 a year. Don't screw with $30 problems. You need to solve $10,000 problems, not $30 problems. You make a lot of money.
Starting point is 01:54:31 You're too smart for that. Don't fall for that crap. Stupid people don't make $350,000. But you got sucked into having this mind game that somehow you're going to get something for nothing and just go make some money, man, and take care of the money you made that'll get you there Wow beautiful beautiful call so Jade you're not old enough and you gotta be really old in our audience but you guys can look it up it's probably on the internet when I was a kid they had a thing called green stamps you ever heard
Starting point is 01:55:01 of that I have not heard of that so you would go to the grocery store and when you're checking out, they have this little printout and it would print out these little green stamps, look like a postage stamp, but there's a little sheet of them. And my mom had a little book and you would post them in the book and when you filled up a certain number of pages, then you had 3,000 cents, right? But we actually, you know, saved up after four years of grocery buying and diligently licking these stamps
Starting point is 01:55:30 and putting them in these little books. And I think we got a really small, 18 inch tabletop charcoal grill. Look at that. That today would cost probably, I don't know, $28. $28, yeah. $28 or something at the Sporting Goods Store, Sports Academy, right? You get the little tabletop one for camping, it's the cheapest one in there. But this would have been $19.70 something, so that would have been a dollar and a half
Starting point is 01:55:58 or two dollars or whatever. I mean, it was the cheap, but we worked our little bony fingers off on those stupid green stamps to get this stupid grill, and it was like the lamp table in Christmas. Yes. The leg lamp with the fringe. The leg lamp with the fringe, yeah. It was the same thing. It was a prized possession in the Ramsey household that we had this grill that we had licked our way into. That story is gold.
Starting point is 01:56:28 People have been falling for this since time began. So, quit looking for an easy way. The fastest way to get rich quick is get rich slow. Live on less than you make. Put money in your investments. And then you'll have some money. Oh, this is a deep formula right here. But you work it, it'll work, I can tell you. Listen, your home is your most expensive asset and now you're ready to sell, fast and for
Starting point is 01:57:29 a lot of money. But in this wackadoodle real estate market, one mistake could cost you tens of thousands of dollars. Here's the deal, this ain't amateur hour. You need a pro in your corner, someone who knows how to price your home right, market it well, and negotiate the best deal. That's where a Ramsey Trusted Real Estate Agent comes in. To find one near you, go to ramsysolutions.com slash agent. That's ramsysolutions.com slash agent. Our scripture of the day, Luke 16, 10, whoever can be trusted with very little can also be
Starting point is 01:58:13 trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much. Milton Friedman said, only the government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink, and make the combination worthless. Wow! Wow! That's great. All right, Nick is with us in St. Louis. Hi Nick, how are you? Good, how are you guys? Better than we deserve, what's up? So my question is, is it a good idea to have my boss co-sign for a house for me? Wow. How long have you been listening to this show, Nick?
Starting point is 01:59:03 Like three months. Okay. What are your thoughts on the matter? I mean, I trust him. I just don't know. There's a lot that goes into it. So, I mean, do you guys want the full details? They're strength attached is what I could say. Well, what are the strengths? So he wants, so he has, this is his friend's house currently. They are moving. So he wants somebody and he currently rents their garage because he loves exotic vehicles and he's got lifts and all kinds of stuff in
Starting point is 01:59:42 their garage. So he rents their space in the garage. So he wants to do that with us. So he wants to pay, when we did the numbers, it'd be about half the mortgage to rent our garage space so he can put his vehicles in there. But we know that we can't get that big of a loan, so he would have to co-sign for us. How long you work there, hon? A little over a year. I've known him for about
Starting point is 02:00:13 three years. And you're 25? I am 23. Okay. And you've been looking at houses a lot. Y'all really, really want a house bad, don't you? Well, I currently I'm in one now. You own a home now? Yes. You and your fiancee own a home? Yes. Together? Yes. When are you getting married? I know. Next November. Okay. So let's play this out. So you explained what the perfect world situation is.
Starting point is 02:00:50 Let me just throw out some ideas. What would happen? Let's say he cosigns with you, you guys do this deal, he pays half the mortgage. What happens if he decides he doesn't want to pay anymore? What happens if you get fired from your job? He decides he doesn't want to pay anymore, what would happen? Cause you said that you can't afford it on your own.
Starting point is 02:01:15 Yeah, I mean, we would have to pretty much sell it. Mm-hmm. And what happens if- Immediately. Yeah. And is it worth that? I mean, we could afford it, like, We could afford a couple of months, but it's way bigger. I mean, it's twice the size of what we live in now. So that's what it is. It's this giant house. Because on my side, I'm trying to think what would cause you to put yourself in such a precarious situation.
Starting point is 02:01:41 Because he's able to get something that there's no other way he could get. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, we live in, it's not a house. We live in like a townhouse, but we do own it. Um, so we're kind of in a complex. So there's a lot of people, we don't have our own yard. We have a dog. We love brand to like, You're 23. You're 23. You just get started Yeah, there's nothing wrong with that. So, okay here's the answer to your question and then I will also tell you why okay never
Starting point is 02:02:15 Do a co-sign deal under any circumstances ever Okay, and the reason is is that you're signing up for a deal that you know and that the bank knows doesn't work unless everything goes perfectly. And honey, 100 percent of the time things don't go perfectly. Let me tell you, as soon as you close on the house
Starting point is 02:02:40 the competitor calls you up and offers you $10,000 more a year to go to change jobs and you can't take the job because you feel loyal to the guy who has cars in your garage and if you do take the job he sues you because he thought you were going to stay with him forever he thought you were going to stay with him that he thought he had bought a slave he didn didn't think he did cosigning. So never do a cosign deal. There's not a single circumstance on the planet that this is a good idea and yours is particularly bad because there's about nine million things that can go wrong and only one that can go right. The probability of this being a good idea 10 years from now is very close to zero.
Starting point is 02:03:31 You're going to get screwed. You're going to be stressed. You're going to make wrong decisions for the wrong reasons because you painted yourself into the corner and you're going to get paint on your feet. Please don't do this deal. He's trying to be helpful. He's not a bad guy. He's trying to be helpful and you're trying to do a nice thing for your fiancee soon-to-be wife and you, with good reason, want a nice place. I don't blame you for any of that, but you're trying to do a good thing a bad way and
Starting point is 02:04:01 it's gonna bite you in the butt. Does any of that make sense? Yeah, no, it makes perfect sense. We've been contemplating it. It sounded great on paper, but there were so many things that could go wrong so quickly. The likelihood of you still working there 10 years from today on average is zero. Period. For no reason at all. Other than you get a better job, he goes broke, he gets mad and fires you, whatever. I mean, it just doesn't. The number of people that stay on a job 10 years, we celebrate 10 year Ramsey-versary people that have been here 10 years. And the number of people that are here three years or four years or five years or six years,
Starting point is 02:04:43 there's a lot of them. But the number of people here 10 years not that much. The number of people here 20 years almost none. This doesn't go well. This doesn't end well. And by the way you know when you buy a house that's double the size it's not just double the mortgage it's double the problems and the things that you have to take care of with the property. Oh crap yes. You know what I'm saying? It's not just the mortgage. Double the roof that's going to leak care of with the property. Oh crap, yes. You know what I'm saying? It's not just the mortgage. You've got to take care of that. Double the roof that's going to leak. Yes.
Starting point is 02:05:08 That's real. Chris is in Nashville. Hi Chris, what's up? Not much. Thanks for taking my call. Sure. How can I help? I guess I'm calling for a reality check or just some wisdom in when I can stop working.
Starting point is 02:05:21 And it's not as much stop working as just figure out what I want want to be when I grow up when your nest egg is big enough when your nest egg is big enough to run perpetually Well, I got some I got some rental property. I'm closing on a deal Hopefully the end of this month and I'll have about 8500 a month passive income coming in there's no such thing as passive income you talk about real estate deal Well, I'm talking about rental properties rental property is not passive. It's I get it. Yes, sir Okay. All right. So you have you're gonna have eight thousand dollars a month net profit Yes, sir. If everybody pays and if it's all full correct. So in the real world, you probably got six thousand
Starting point is 02:06:04 Well, because it's never all full and everybody not everybody always pays. Correct. Okay. I got a bunch of rental property okay I mean I know what those works right so So you got about six thousand you can count on there and what's it take for you to live dude? I got no bills no mortgage. What's it take for you to live? That's what I'm trying to figure out. Well, run a budget. Yeah, I mean, what is the, I mean, how do you, it's also like, even if I don't quit
Starting point is 02:06:33 what I'm doing, like I just want to take a year off. Am I selfish for that? Is that insane? It might be. Mathematically, it might be impossible. Yeah, it's not impossible. If you need $16,000 a month to live and you're gonna try to do it on 6,000 because you want to take a year off Well, get me some cheese with this wine. Yeah. Yeah. No, sir. No, that's that's not expenses or nothing
Starting point is 02:06:53 Okay, literally are you single? Yeah. No married two kids. All right. So what does it take to operate your house? Can you do that on six thousand if you can then, then you're okay. If you can't, then you're not. You need to run a budget. Got it. You and your wife need to sit down and go, this is the price we're going to pay. We're used to spending ten thousand because we go on all these trips and stuff. This year we're going to take off and we're going to live on six thousand and we're not going to go on the trips or whatever it is. I don't care. But deal with your own reality. That's right. That's right. Pull up
Starting point is 02:07:27 your actual numbers and don't count on a hundred percent occupancy and a hundred percent of tenants paying. That's an illusion and it ain't passive ever. Passive with a tenant you got no tenant. That puts us out of the Ramsey show in the books. We'll be back with you before you know it. In the meantime, remember, there's ultimately only one way to financial peace, and that's to walk daily with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus. ["The Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus"]
Starting point is 02:08:02 Hey, you guys, I was shocked to learn that 88% of you out there are sharing the Ramsey show. I mean that is so incredible. Thank you so much. And I want to tell you that we're making it even easier to share. So this June we have pulled together the brand new Ramsey 101 YouTube playlist, a quick start collection of how to get started walking the Ramsey Plan. Now this playlist is perfect for that one person in your life who needs help winning with money and just doesn't know where to start. So here's
Starting point is 02:08:33 what's inside. What the baby steps are and why they actually work, how the debt snowball helps you pay off debt fast, and how to build wealth and invest for the future, and so much more. So here's what you need to do. Click the link at the top of the show notes. It'll take you straight to the YouTube playlist. Copy it. Text it. Send it in a group chat. Just say, hey I thought this might help. Because one playlist shared at the right time could be the turning point. One share, one playlist, one step could change everything for that one person in your
Starting point is 02:09:10 life. So click the link, share The Ramsey Show, and let's help someone out there start winning with money.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.