The Ramsey Show - Stop Letting Dumb Decisions Control Your Financial Future

Episode Date: March 18, 2026

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Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:05 Brought to you by the Every Dollar app. Start budgeting for free today. Normal is broke and common sense is weird, so we're here to help you transform your life. From the Ramsey Network and the Fairwinds Credit Union Studio, this is The Ramsey Show. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host, Dr. John Deloney, host of the Dr. John Deloney Show and number one bestselling author. Ramsey Personality is my co-host today. The phone number is AAA-825-225. Call is free and some say the advice is worth exactly what you pay for it. Ann is with us in Nashville.
Starting point is 00:00:43 Hi, Ann, how are you? Hi. How are you? I'm good. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? So I am calling today because essentially my husband and I have been married 10 years.
Starting point is 00:00:58 In that 10 years, we've never had share of bank accounts. essentially when I was graduating college, my grandmother on her deathbed told me, don't ever let a man control your money. You make it, you control it. And I kind of took that to heart because she never left a bad marriage because she didn't have money to do so. So we're 10 years in and now I feel completely hoodwinked because my husband has been, using the money that he has, like using cash.
Starting point is 00:01:37 I don't know where the cash is going, but he's been apparently funding his entire life on an Amex card that I just found out has an $18,000 balance at a 30% interest rate. And when I confronted him about it, I told him he needed to cancel the card that we were going to be eating rice and beans because this was absolutely unacceptable. but he told me he was going to take care of it. He was going to make a budget.
Starting point is 00:02:05 He didn't want me talking to him like that, didn't want me talking to him like he was a child. Yeah, I mean, you suddenly decided you wanted to interfere in his money. Yeah. After 10 years of telling him he wanted nothing to do with him. No wonder he pissed. Well, I mean, I'm over here. Well, I know, but you lost all the right to vote on his money when you said I'm not going to vote on your money. You decided out of the gate, I'm going to row in my boat, you rowing yours, and now you're mad at the direction he's rowing.
Starting point is 00:02:39 Yeah, but my money is paying for our entire life. Well, that's not a new thing. No. So this is the other thing. So he is disabled, and he gets, like, this pension, and for years, I thought this pension was a pittance. Like, I literally was like, okay, he pays, like, the utilities and whatever. Well, I found out too, this pension is not a pittance. Like, apparently, you know, because I'm like paying for all of our insurance premiums, like putting money in a 403B, putting money into all kids' college savings plans, you know, I insurance, dental insurance for everyone, he brings home more money than I do now.
Starting point is 00:03:21 Okay, okay. Hold on. Why are you blaming him? this is the arrangement y'all co-created at your direction based on bad advice from your grandma you're blaming him that he makes a bunch of money and you didn't know about it
Starting point is 00:03:39 okay you get what I'm saying well did you ever ask him I did so several times like I'd ask him and several times I was like you know hey you know
Starting point is 00:03:52 this is what's going like this is what's going on like this is how I'm budgeting things this is what's going on with everything and you know I'd be like do you want to like go ahead and start working together and he would be like well I don't know how to change my dark deposit or I don't know how to do online banking or you know it would always be something some reason but then I was just non-confrontational so I never just you know try to pig him down on it well but but also he has a very real lived experience that things are going to be done your way, the way you want them at your direction.
Starting point is 00:04:33 You what I'm saying? There's a difference between, hey, look at all the stuff I'm having to pay for. Do you want to start combining money and do it my way? And him going, nope. Or are you saying, hey, I set us out on a bad course? I thought the greatest way to keep myself safe was to keep myself disconnected from my spouse and I was wrong and I want a chance to rebuild this thing from the ground up will you be in this with me and that means we're going to combine everything including our fears our shame our embarrassments
Starting point is 00:05:03 and our money and we've got to be united in this thing you see how one of those is an accusation and one of those is a demand and one of those is an invitation yeah right but now I'm left with like you know I've created you know this budget I have sinking funds I have I know my Listen, you've got to change your language. I, I, I, I, he, he, he. You have to change it to we. So, okay. You what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:05:32 I do, but now we have this like $18,000 credit card with a 30% interest rate. That's the cost of doing business poorly. Yeah. Yes. So what do I do? How do I tell it? Send the bill to your grandmother. Right?
Starting point is 00:05:44 She caused it. We have to decide that we are going to do money differently. We're going to be connected and we are both going to get this debt paid off. And we're going to decide how we spend money. And I'm going to stop lecturing you and being mad at you. And also I'm going to tell you. He didn't do anything wrong, by the way. He's just doing what y'all arranged together.
Starting point is 00:06:03 He did nothing wrong in this thing. He did exactly what you told him to do. He went over there and lived his life. And then you're bitching about how he lived it. You can't do that. You don't get it both ways. Yeah. You got to come back together.
Starting point is 00:06:17 Yeah. So the two of you sit down and start fresh and go, okay, I want to do over. the two of us are going to become one, like the preacher says, and now you are one, and we're going to put all of our money in the middle of the table, and I'm not going to gripe at you about the $18,000. We're going to cut up the amex card, and together we're going to decide what we are going to spend on fun, what we are going to spend on life, what we are going to put in the kids 529, how we are going to pay the insurance bills, and we together are putting all of our money, and he gets a vote, and you get a vote on how this budget looks. And if he says no, I'm not, I don't know how I'm not going to fix my direct deposit, then you all have a much bigger issue in your marriage than just doing money separately. You get what I'm saying? I guess I do. Because it just, I guess it feels kind of like dishonest that he's let me believe for 10 years that he's got this like pittance of an income. I don't think so. I don't think so. Maybe. You are working really hard to make him a bad guy in this. And I want you to reframe that because it's your fault. I really, I mean, that'll be good for your marriage. I got to tell you, I don't want to change my deposit because my wife thinks I've been lying to her for 10 years. And I don't think my vote's going to count in this budget meeting. I'll bet you he doesn't want to change the deposit then.
Starting point is 00:07:35 Yeah. But I wouldn't either. I wouldn't either. And if you've been saying, hey, I need some help and he says, I don't have any money and he's been lying to you, that's one thing. That's a different issue. But doesn't sound like that's been happening. Yeah, might have. But even then, you know, he certainly didn't come full forward and go, look, I make more than you on my disability check.
Starting point is 00:07:54 He didn't do that. And he should have. I don't disagree with that part. But I think you guys get the opportunity to start over. But the only way this guy's going to join in with you is if he doesn't have to acquiesce and lose all power because you shame him into it. That's not going to work. It has to be an invitation. Yep.
Starting point is 00:08:13 Not going to work. Almost all invitations start with eye statements. I mess this up. I want to do this different. I want us to be together. Will you join me in this? And it's going to take us changing the way we do everything. And you get a vote and I get a vote.
Starting point is 00:08:26 And we're going to agree like two grownups together. I'm not your mama. And I'm not going to bitch at you about this anymore. Dave, we got a lot of calls on this show where life happens. One day someone's healthy. They're working, providing for their family. And then a curveball hits. You know, we hear it all the time.
Starting point is 00:09:10 A car accident, a cancer diagnosis, a heart attack. And suddenly, everything changes. Yeah, and that's why you've always said that having term life insurance from Xander is essential, because it protects your family if the worst happens. Yeah, that's right. You need 10 to 12 times your income in coverage. No gimmicks, no whole life junk, just straightforward term life protection. But there's another piece that people often overlook, and that's long-term disability insurance.
Starting point is 00:09:40 Yeah, it's important to understand the difference between them. life insurance steps in when you die. Disability insurance steps in while you're alive but can't work. So it replaces a large part of your income so the bills still get paid while you get back on your feet. Now, if your employer gives you free disability insurance, great. Take it. If it's discounted there at a better price, take it. But if not, Zander can help you find the right plan. Whether you're single or married, it's not optional.
Starting point is 00:10:06 If you're going to be out of work for a while, then you need to make sure the money still showing up. And that's why Zander is our go-to. They make it super simple to get the right coverage at the best price, no pressure, no upselling. I've trusted Jeff Zander and Zander insurance for over 25 years, and so is my family. So don't wait. It's fast, it's easy, and it could make all the difference. Go to Zander.com or call 800, 356, 4282. Protect yourself, protect your income, protect your family. Susanna's in West Palm Beach, Florida. Hi, Susanna. How are you? Hi, I'm doing well, Dave. Thanks for asking and thanks for taking my call. How are you? Better than I deserve. How can I help?
Starting point is 00:11:08 Hi, so yeah, me and my husband, we just recently got married a little under a year ago. We're going on a year. I am 29. He's 29 as well. We're at the same age. And we just have decision, financial fatigue from trying to decide whether we should continue to invest. I'm kind of going on the route of investing still or pay off. our debt. So my husband and I, we make about 11,500 a month right now, which will be our highest income. Congratulations. Yeah, this is great. Thank you. How much debt do you have? So we have 85,000 in debt. On what? So I have 24,000 on my car. We just paid off his car, which was 26,000. We just did that last month. Very good. Yeah, so that was a huge list. So now we're talking to and decide, like, do we continue? And then I have 61,000 student loans, unfortunately. Gotcha. Okay. And you're 29 yourself. All right. So let me, let's pan out a little bit from,
Starting point is 00:12:10 instead of looking at the actual situation right there in front of you, and ask, what is the goal with your money? Okay. Because it'll affect what you should do. Okay. So in other words, goal number one could be, I'm going to live my life wide open right now. I'm going on six cruises a year. I'm going to do whatever I want to do. I make $11,000. That's a goal. And if that's your goal, it's a different answer.
Starting point is 00:12:41 If your goal is, I want to live a good, solid life, I'm willing to be sacrificial for a short period of time to increase the speed in which we build wealth, which will allow us to be outrageously generous and doing anything we want to do, which is the goal we usually are aligning people to, okay? So what's the fastest way to become wealthy, in other words, so that I can live the life I want to live and change my family tree and be outrageously generous? So what's the fastest way to become wealthy? If that's the goal, then I can help you. Yes, yes, that would be the goal. Okay, then the data says stop all investing temporarily and pay off the $80,000. thousand as fast as you possibly can. And here's why. Okay, here's what the data says this. We studied 10,167
Starting point is 00:13:33 millionaires, the largest study of millionaires ever done. What we found was that they increased the speed at which their net worth went up. Their 401k's got fully funded. They jammed them up and they got their home paid off when they got rid of their debt because your most powerful wealth building tool is your income. And right now the bone marrow is being sucked out of your income with $85,000 with a bullcrap. And so when you get rid of that, it increases the velocity of your wealth building. That's what the data tells us from studying millionaires. And actually, the math will tell you that too when you think about, okay, all those payments on that $85,000, what if we just put that into an investment?
Starting point is 00:14:11 Oh, that's $5 million in five years or 10 years or 20 years or whatever it is, right? And so you can see those payments are mathematically, the arithmetic is sucking the marrow out of your investments. And so you're trying to do some investing because you want to build wealth. Meanwhile, you're limping along in mediocrity because a large portion of your $11,000 is going to past stupidity. Yes, very true. And that's normal.
Starting point is 00:14:40 I mean, that's normal. So what we have found is that with your income, you'll be debt free in about 18 months if you go crazy for a short period of time. and say, all right, we're not going out to eat. We're going to sell so much stuff the kids think they're next. We're not going on vacation. We're going to clear the stinking $85,000 because it's between me and winning. Yes.
Starting point is 00:15:02 Okay. Okay. I definitely see a whole new perspective on it. Sacrificing now will get us to the long-term wealth later on instead of trying to do it. You had the right goal. The only question is what's the most effective path to that goal, right? and so that and that's what we've come down to we figured that you know from 30 years of sitting in the seat answering these questions and helping people become millionaires tens of thousands of
Starting point is 00:15:30 them um and and and Sharon and I did and and the Ramsey personalities did and I talked to two of my leaders downstairs a while ago they just both of them paid off their house in the last three weeks and both of them said as soon as we paid off our house that put us at the millionaire mine you know the millionaire net worth and then and then boom with no stinking house payment. I put that in a calculator. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Well, you put a house payment in a calculator and you go, hey, what's that turn into in 20 years?
Starting point is 00:15:58 It's not a million. It's like 10 million. Well, and Dave, I think there's, for me personally, in my house, there's a whole other side of this equation, which is as the news gets crazy, as the world gets crazy, knowing that the banks don't care. you signed up to make a payment every month. This student loan payment is due. This car payment is due. This mortgage payment is due. It doesn't matter if you lose your job.
Starting point is 00:16:27 That payment still do. It doesn't matter if your hours get cut. That payment still do. Taking that stuff off your risk profile lets you sleep, man. It just changes the temperature and the tension in your home. And that to me is worth as much as my overall net worth portfolio is just having peace in my house. What's weird is, it's not only just that. That then causes you to make different decisions that are wiser, and that accelerates your wealth building.
Starting point is 00:16:54 Yes. Because you're coming from peace, not from desperation. We've all been approached by a salesman that is happy to help us and wants us to win. And we've also been approached by a salesman who we know, oh, you need the sale. Right. That level of desperation is just different. And you are more successful. I want to work with that guy that wants to help me out, not the one that needs me to over.
Starting point is 00:17:18 spend, right? So anyway, there's the money part, but man, there's that piece part. And they just do work together. They work so well together. It's really cool. So, hey, thanks for calling. Joy's in Orlando. Hey, Joy, what's up? Good. How are you? I was wondering, my dad is offering to be a bank as I'm looking for homes, and I'm wondering if that's okay to take him up on that offer. No! No! Run, Joy, run! Your dad's, your dad is sweet. He's awesome. He's sweet, but don't do it. Here's why.
Starting point is 00:17:52 That's what I thought, but I thought I should ask. The old joke is if you loan your brother-in-law $100 and he never speaks to you again, was it worth it? So the borrower is slave to the lender. And when you owe someone money, even someone as sweet as your dad, and your dad's a really nice guy. I mean, because jerks don't offer to give their daughter like bank money, right? So loan their daughter bank money. But when you eat Thanksgiving dinner with your master, even if he's a nice master, it still tastes different. Yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 00:18:28 And you're looking over your shoulder wondering if he's judging the vacation you're taking while you owe him money. Are you married, Joy? I'm not. Okay. Yeah. I promise if you start dating somebody or you go get married and you're still in this arrangement, that's going to be real weird between the two of them. Here's what I would do. I would tell my dad, I would take him out for a breakfast somewhere, not super expensive, but kind of
Starting point is 00:18:55 nice. And I would tell them, thank you so much, but I want you to always just be my dad. You get what I'm saying? I want to preserve that. Dad, I want to preserve that relationship. I don't ever want it to be weird. Let me do banking with banks. I want you to always just be my dad. And if he decides to gift you $100,000 instead of loaning it to you, you can take it. Take it all day long. Take it all day long. That's so funny. I didn't say you bring it up.
Starting point is 00:19:25 I said if he decides. I mean, you might want to bring it up. It's kidding. No. Yeah, be careful. This is the, this ends up poorly. So when I went broke and lost everything, Sharon's dad loaned us money. And Sharon's dad, he's 97 now.
Starting point is 00:19:44 He's the nicest man. I've never known. He is the sweetest, kindest, gentlest guy. He never said an unkind word. And I got that paid back really, really fast. And it drove me. Bunkers! Yeah. I couldn't stand it. And Sharon's like, what's no big deal? She's my dad. The shadow of her dad just like, was over your house. Yeah. Yeah. In the midst of having gone broke, lost everything bankrupted and shamed. Now, her daddy has to come bail you up. And I have to eat Thanksgiving dinner there. And he never said a stinking word.
Starting point is 00:20:20 None of that's on him. It's all on me. But it proved to me that point the borrower is slave to the lender. You've worked too hard to get control of your money just to let strangers control your data. Think about it. Just about every time you sign up for a newsletter, grab a coupon code, or start a free trial, your personal info, like your name, email address, phone number, and more get scooped up and sold by data brokers. Here's the deal.
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Starting point is 00:21:35 annual plans and take back control. That's join delete me.com slash ramsie. Doug is in Philadelphia. Hi Doug. How are you? Good. How are you, sir? Thank you so much for having me on the show. Sure. How can we help? My financial journey and I got a part-time job. I work a full-time job, but I got a part-time job at a big box home improvement store. And when I started their, you know, credit cards are always a thing. I have never signed anybody up for one. I refuse to do it.
Starting point is 00:22:34 I have no issue. I will never do it. And it was really never a big deal when they would ask, you know, I tell them, nobody wants to already have one. But they've really been recently pushing. Like every day I go in, hey, you haven't signed anybody up for a credit card. Hey, you haven't signed anybody up for a credit card. And now they're starting to offer helox.
Starting point is 00:22:55 And they're telling me they want me to start pushing these helox. and my conundrum is, is do I, I only got about nine to ten months left there before I've completed my goals and I'm actually out of baby step three. Do I just continue to play that game and say, oh yeah, it's fine? Or do I say, sit down with my manager and say, hey, here's, here are my values, here are my convictions. And I will not push these products onto people and I myself and here trying to get out of debt. Yeah. Well, if you do that, you're going to get fired. Yeah. So an easier method would be just quit.
Starting point is 00:23:37 Be easier. Be easier on everybody. Or you can just ride it out for nine months and, you know. But it's the business that they're in. And it's they have now said, okay, you work for us. Your job is to help someone find the bolt, the screw, the lock. and to sign them up for a credit card. That's your job. And if you're not doing that, you're not doing your job.
Starting point is 00:24:02 That's what they're saying. Right? Yes. Yes. Yeah. And so, and you don't want to do that. And so I honestly, I think you probably get another job that doesn't require that that pays about the same, don't you? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:19 Yeah. I enjoy helping. I have a maintenance background. So I really enjoy helping customers figure out their purpose. problems and helping them with their DIY projects. And I enjoy that, doing that aspect of it. And like at first I never had a problem. It was never really pushed the whole credit card thing.
Starting point is 00:24:40 But now it's almost, it's every day I walk in. And it's just I want to say to them, like, I'm not doing that. I will help customers get their products. I'll help them with their problems and solve them and fix it. But I'm not pushing the credit card. And I understand the moral aspect of it, but the bottom line is, is they own the company and they said this is your job and you don't want to do the job. Yes, I guess, yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 00:25:10 It shouldn't be the job. The job ought to be what you're talking about, helping people with their DIY project, and it ought to be fun to do that. I have a friend that back during COVID was bored and he went to work in one of those stores. And the thing that drove him crazy was they had a pot. policy that no matter what happens, if someone wants to return something, you have to take it back. And he had a guy come in that has had a lawnmower for two years mowing his grass with it and brought it back, said, I don't like it. And he's supposed to give him a full credit. And he goes, that's immoral.
Starting point is 00:25:42 I'm not doing that. And they go, yeah, you are. And he goes, no, that's wrong. That guy's ripping us off. We shouldn't do that. And they go, no, that's our policy. We take it back no matter what, no matter how absurd. And they fired him because he wouldn't take the lawnmower. He said, I'm not going to do it. And they're like, well, that's what your job is. You work for us. Well, that's true. If you work for someone and they tell you this is your job, you have to do the job or you don't get to work there.
Starting point is 00:26:06 I mean, that's a simple thing, right? So I don't disagree with the angst that is created by you here. I honestly, if I were in your shoes, I'd go look for something else. If you want to sit down with your supervisor and say, hey, listen, I don't want to cause a stink. I don't want to get fired. and I'm not going to make some big moralistic speech here, but I'm here to help people with their DIY stuff, and I really enjoy that,
Starting point is 00:26:30 and I'm really not going to be doing this credit card thing. If you think I should quit, if that's the case, you tell me, you could do that. Okay. And Doug, can I pass something along to you? And this is the pot talking to the kettle here. Yeah, absolutely. How often do you spend having imaginary conversations with your boss
Starting point is 00:26:52 and your owners? I've had a couple. You've had a bunch where you're going to sit them down, you're going to tell them and they're going to be like, oh, that's right, that's what's up. And you always have the mic drop moment at the end and it feels so good. Let me tell you this. It's not going to work that way.
Starting point is 00:27:07 Those imaginary conversations are a complete and utter waste of your time. In fact, they're not even benign. They detract energy that you could be spending on loving your wife well, loving your kids well, and being at peace. And so commit to not having imaginary conversations, either have it or don't, and then seek, like, Dave's, like, man, you're, you're working a part-time job. Go find another part-time job, man, and then sail off into the sunset. I'm not going to give you my character and my integrity and extra energy that could go to my
Starting point is 00:27:38 family. It's not going to do it. Tara is in Birmingham. Hey, Tara, what's up? Hi, I am a 29-year-old single veterinarian. I am three years out from school and having a, pre-marriage discussions with my boyfriend. Yay. Neither have debt. He owns his house. My student loans are our big discussion point. I have 301,000 in student loans with a 57% average interest.
Starting point is 00:28:09 I currently work on. No, no, no, no, stop, stop. You said 57%. 5.7? 5.7. Yeah, okay. Dang, Gina. That's going to be a little different.
Starting point is 00:28:20 Okay. Sorry. I currently work for the federal government. Yeah. And I made $97,000 a year. Mm-hmm. So I was planning on student loan forgiveness, but I don't trust that it's going to stay around. And we're looking at potentially having kids before then.
Starting point is 00:28:44 Mm-hmm. And I don't know that I will stay full-time. I'd rather set aside money for my own small business, but I have such a large sum of student loans. I'm not sure what I should prioritize paying it off before kids come or setting aside money for my own business. So I can have that option when kids come and to big loans. No, no. Yeah, here's the thing. I know a lot of veterinarians.
Starting point is 00:29:22 We work with a lot of them in Entry leadership, and I've got several personal friends that were veterinarians, and you're always very, very intelligent people because a medical doctor only has to learn one body system. You have to learn multiple species of body systems. And so I know that you're a bright person or you wouldn't be a DVM. Okay, so, and you worked really, really hard to get to be a DVM. And you sacrificed a lot of your future in $300,000 to get to be a DVM.
Starting point is 00:30:05 And so I want to quit and stay home and raise babies. You gave that up when you signed up for $300K until you get the $300K cleared. You're a vet. You're a vet. You signed up to be a vet, kiddo. You got to go be a vet, and you've got to get this stinking mess cleaned up. That's why I want to have my business. You know, you don't have the money to do a business. You're broke. You're $300,000 in debt. You make 97 a year, and you can make $150 a year by just picking up side gigs,
Starting point is 00:30:40 working emergency medicine and some of the other stuff, and you need to go to work. You need to work 24-7 all the time and get the same. this out of your life. Now, if you guys get married and you can live on his income, and it sounds like he's very financially responsible, well, if you're making 100, you can clean up 300 pretty quick, can't you? You're making 150, you can clean it up even quicker. And if he throws in, if he's got money to add that when you're not combined income, that's even faster. Before you do anything, before we talk about, I want to quit and stay home. You don't start talking about starting a business and I want to quit and stay home in the same sentence. Those are incongruent. So you've got to
Starting point is 00:31:16 decide which you is going to be. But for now, eight years ago, you decided you were going to be a vet, $300,000 worth a whole worth. And so now you've got to clean up your mess. When you're drowning in credit card debt and collectors start threatening lawsuits, a rep from some call center debt relief company can't protect you. A lot of so-called debt relief programs leave people wondering, am I actually protected if I get sued? When all you've got is a legal plan added on as an upsell, of course you feel stuck. But Guardian isn't another debt relief company. They're real attorneys. And with Guardian, you're assigned an attorney from day one. That means if a creditor sues, you're not scrambling and you're not hit with surprise legal fees. Now look, I'm telling
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Starting point is 00:33:20 Ask Ramsey. Ask Ramsey is our free AI tool that's built and trained on proven Ramsey principles. Can you imagine if we dumped like seven years of radio calls and podcast calls into an AI and let it know how to answer exactly how we would answer? Oh, and all the Financial Peace University lessons. Oh, and all the books have written all dumped in there. And then you can answer the question the way we would answer the question, right? That's what I ask Ramsey is, and it's completely free. You're going to get answer the same way we would. Maybe not quite the level of snark, but probably some level of snark.
Starting point is 00:33:55 Ask your question today at Ramsey Solutions.com or click the link in the description if you're listening on podcast or YouTube. Matthew is in Orlando. Hi, Matthew. How are you? I'm good. Appreciate you. Both taking my call.
Starting point is 00:34:08 Sure. What's up? So I'm looking to be a first-time home buyer. I'm 27 years old, and I have about $120,000 saved up towards my first. Just staying out of debt for a number of years. It builds up over time. Look at you. What do you make a year?
Starting point is 00:34:29 About $80,000 after stocks that my company gives and stuff like that. But haven't you heard that all Gen Z's life has been ruined by the real estate market? That it's impossible for you to buy a house, but yet you, young man, went out and saved $120,000. I'm so proud of you. Well, thank you. But, yeah, I just want to make a wise decision with my first home buy. I think I can comfortably get over the 20% needed for a BMI, but I wanted to get as much direction as it possibly could.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Okay. What are you thinking about doing? I want to buy a smaller home, so something like the $250,000 to $300,000 range. But I want to make sure that the, My funds I'm putting in are going to give me still a comfortable home that I can be able to enjoy for that range. Yeah, that makes sense. Well, that just involves a lot of shopping.
Starting point is 00:35:25 And so what happens is I have found this. When I teach leadership, I often tell guys when they're making decisions and gals, when you're making decisions, he with the most options and the most patience makes the best decision. They also win more negotiations, by the way. So options mean you look at a lot of properties. You don't go look at three and buy the fourth one. And you learn the market. You drive the neighborhoods.
Starting point is 00:35:58 You drive them on Friday night to see if it sounds different than the neighborhood than it does on Thursday morning. You know, you check the traffic patterns. You learn and you feel the air. And you look at the properties. You look at how old they are, how worn out the appliances are. You know, what am I getting myself into? And you just gather data and let that data soak into your brain. And it'll become what's called common sense after a while.
Starting point is 00:36:27 And then you'll make a much better choice than somebody that just moves to town and looks at three houses, right? Okay. You're a marathon runner anyway. You're not a sprinter. You like to go steady. That's your style. I can tell by the way you raised that money. You saved that money over time.
Starting point is 00:36:46 Right. Use that same personality trait to make this decision. Okay. Yeah, I was wondering about just, I was told like foreclosure with an option, but I'm not very comfortable with that kind of thought, but I didn't know if maybe a home inspection would be enough to kind of warrant some of the risk that might be coming with that. You need a home inspection.
Starting point is 00:37:09 You need a home inspection on a title policy no matter what you might. foreclosure doesn't necessarily mean bargain and it doesn't necessarily mean the property's trashed but it could mean both so you just get in there and dig around and you go okay i looked at four houses on the street they're all 300 this one's 150 but it needs a roof it's going to need all new landscaping and i'm going to have to paint it and all new appliances in the kitchen's got to be torn out okay so i'm going to have another hundred in it and so i'm going to have two 50 in it when I'm done, but it'll be like new. Okay, that might be a deal.
Starting point is 00:37:48 Or it's trashed and it's a foreclosure and they're still trying to get as much for it as everybody else is trying to get for theirs, which happens all the time, by the way. But people buy it and think they've got a deal just because it said foreclosure, but it's the same stinking numbers the house next door. Right. That's not a deal. So you know a deal because you've looked at the other ones that aren't a deal. Gotcha. Okay.
Starting point is 00:38:13 And then, you know, I wouldn't suggest you get into a heavy rehab, but if you need some new bushes and a new paint job, you can probably do that one. But I wouldn't, on my first home 27 years old, I wouldn't suggest becoming a remodeler all of a sudden. Okay. Just because they do it on TikTok doesn't mean you need to do it. Right. Yeah. I got a feeling you're going to do really well, Matthew. That guy's got to, he's got to figure.
Starting point is 00:38:42 it out, John. Yeah, I like that guy, man. And it's, I think you, the word you use that resonated with me is patience. And for a guy like that, once he flips the switch, I'm going to buy. The real challenge is, can you take six weeks or six months and just go slow and the right place will emerge? You got, you have cash and you've got diligence and you've got a good salary. You're good. Yeah, there's not, there's not, there's not on fire. Just be patient, yeah. Yeah. And dig, dig up a, dig up something that you. like the house and it's in good enough condition that you can see it becoming with the money that you have the place that you're going to be for a while.
Starting point is 00:39:21 Don't call it your forever home because it's not. There's only one forever home. Heaven. John's in Detroit. Hey, John, what's up? Hey, guys, thanks for talking to me. I really appreciate it. Sure.
Starting point is 00:39:35 How can we help? Oh, man. So about six months ago, I had about $250K in the bank. I lived in a $900 apartment, debt-free and own my car. And I'm a self-employed musician, so I was doing pretty good, making about 50 to 60 take home a year. So I decided to purchase a home back in November, put about half down on it. And ever since then, I've been really sick. I actually got sick from the anxiety of owning a home.
Starting point is 00:40:04 And I feel like I'm over-leveraged. My mortgage is about $1,500 a month. and I did get sick from kind of having the mortgage and the stress of it. And then I was in a car accident. My car got totaled, so I ended up having to get a vehicle. And now I have a loan on it for about $9,000, $12,000 with warranty. I'm going to cancel the warranty. So now I have half my money is gone.
Starting point is 00:40:34 I have about $100K left in the bank because I was sick. I have uncertainty for the future. And, you know, I'm just kind of really frightened about being a self-employed first-time home buyer. I've been a musician for 30 years. And I was actually considering maybe selling my house to reset. How much is your house payment? It is $1,500 a month. You did say that, I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:40:57 And you make $4,000 a month? Roughly, $4,000 to $5,000 depending on the season. And you don't have any other payments? No, besides my... And you have $100,000 in the bank. Right. But, sir, I do have my taxes coming up, which is about $5,000. I have to replace the garage roof for about $3,000.
Starting point is 00:41:21 I didn't escrow my property taxes, which I think I might do. And that's about $6,700 a year because I thought I... Well, you still got $75,000, and then we paid off the car. So now we still got $65,000, and you have no payments and nothing outstanding. That's right. Have you ever owned a home before, John? No, that's it. When I got in it, I'm 53.
Starting point is 00:41:45 And I overpaid for it. It was in the height of the market. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Like, you've never done this thing before. That's right. So cut yourself some slack. Give yourself some grace. You're doing a thing that you've never done before.
Starting point is 00:42:00 You've never felt this kind of weight on the squat bar. You got two guys telling us telling you, we know you can lift this. Oh, is that what you guys are saying? Yeah. Well, we're getting ready to. It's a bad idea to sell the house. Here's what is important. And Dave has helped me with this a lot personally.
Starting point is 00:42:17 Is when I feel something really big, especially about money, it's always important to look at the math on the paper. Facts are your friends. Facts are your friends. The facts are the $1,500 out of $4,000 shouldn't cause you any stress, especially when you got $65,000 in the bank and zero debt. and zero bills. And that's where you are. So the stress is manufactured. It's not mathematical. The house is not causing you stress. Your perception of the house is causing you stress. Amen. Hey, let's play a quick game of Would You Rather? Would you rather keep overpaying your phone company every month or save $600 a year with no contract and no price hikes ever? Easy answer. That's why I love Boost Mobile. With their low rates, you can unlock up to $600 in savings over the so-called big carriers.
Starting point is 00:43:19 You can bring your phone, keep your number, and pay just $25 a month forever on the unlimited plan because you've got better things to do with your money. So go to boostmobile.com slash Ramsey to make the switch today. Based on average annual payment of AT&T, Verizon and T-Mobile customers compared to 12 months on the Boost Mobile Unlimited plan as of January 2026. See website for full details. Welcome back to the Ramsey show in the Fairwinds Credit Union Studio. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey personality, is my co-host today.
Starting point is 00:44:00 Andrew is with us in Louisville, Kentucky. Hey, Andrew, what's up? Hey, Dave, how's it going, man? Better than I deserve. How can I help? Well, so I'm 21, and I got two kids, and I made some financial mistakes around the age of 18, and I'm $70,000 in debt now. And here recently, I got into a settlement, and I'm going to be getting around $250,000. and I'm wanting to play the waiting game.
Starting point is 00:44:34 I don't want to pay it off. I just want to let it fall off on its own. And I want the best advice on what I can do. Fall off. Fall off of what? Fall off of my report. The statute of limitations. No, honey.
Starting point is 00:44:48 You owe the money. Correct. I know, but that's seven years. So how did you get $250,000? What happened? So, a kid's mom bought him a 3D printed firearm, or I mean a 3D printer, and he 3D printed a firearm with it, and he accidentally shot me, and I'm now, I went after her homeowner's insurance policy, and that's what I got out of it. That's the wildest thing I've ever heard. You got shot by a 3D printed firearm?
Starting point is 00:45:26 Yes, so the handle, the lower handle, the magazine, and then the slide part is all 3D printed. The only thing is metal would be the barrel, the trigger mechanism, and the bullets. How old was this kid? I'm just curious. This is fascinating. 14. And he knows how to build a firearm from scratch. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:50 Well, there's YouTube, I guess. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Wow. The wild world we live in. Yeah. That's the nuts. So they pay off 250 grand.
Starting point is 00:45:59 You owe 70,000 on what? The Dodge Hellcat. I'll just, I put it to you there. I went and got it brand new. Where is it? I got to prove it's gone. Where did it go? The only reason they did, it got sold.
Starting point is 00:46:20 Okay. You got it reproved. I couldn't. tell you. I have no idea. Like I said, I made some... You weren't that drunk. Where'd the car go? He got sold. Who sold it? You had to sell it. You owned it.
Starting point is 00:46:38 Yes. Okay, so you sold it. It didn't get sold. I sold it. Okay, when you sold it, you didn't pay it off? No. How did you sell a car and give a title without paying it off? No title. that's a lot of the deals nowadays. People like cars that way.
Starting point is 00:46:59 What had happened was the fuel pump had went out, and it was going to cost around $1,500 to just the part alone. And, you know, as I mentioned, being 18, these days I'm kind of up on, and I never heard anybody buying a dead gum car without a title. How'd you get tags? They came with it. They didn't buy it for,
Starting point is 00:47:24 I guess you would say leisurely driving if that makes sense. Are they too fast, too furious? Yeah, drug dealer doing runs, and so they didn't so it's still titled to you. No, I would say morally track stuff, because a lot of the tracks, they don't require cars to have titles or vans or anything like that.
Starting point is 00:47:45 All right. So you owe $70,000 on a car that you didn't pay off when you sold it? Correct. All of it is that? Yes, that's it Okay, well when you get your 250, you write a check and you pay the people that you owe because you screwed them. Correct. Okay, good.
Starting point is 00:48:02 Now we have 180. Now, my question would be, though, could I come at them with, say, 50, full check? I didn't come at them with anything. I don't know. I want you to be a person of integrity here, brother. Like, you walked into a place, even though you're 18. And you said, hey, I'll give you this amount of money if you give me that car right now. And they said, deal.
Starting point is 00:48:27 And they made a bad deal, and you were 18 didn't know what you're doing. But you shook hands and signed a piece of paper, brother. Correct. And just because a 14-year-old printed a gun and shot you with it, and you have this windfall of cash all of a sudden. Thank God you weren't permanently injured. Yeah. So, man, do us right? What do you make a year?
Starting point is 00:48:51 Right now, I'm making close. to 70 of where I'm located. Good, good for you. Okay. All right. So you call them up and say, I need to settle this debt. What will you accept and see what they say? And whatever they tell you, write them a check for that.
Starting point is 00:49:09 Okay? Then maybe they'll take 50. They might. Okay. And here, one of the things that we find, as we've studied wealthy people, is not like I was told when I was growing up, not by my parents, but by people in my neighborhood. They all said wealthy people are crooks, okay? And all the data that we have today tells us it's quite the opposite.
Starting point is 00:49:35 And so if you want to become a wealthy person that changes your family tree, that your children have a different life than you had, and then your dad had, and then his dad had, and you change everything, you have to become a person of extreme integrity. Quit doing crap under the table, cars with no titles. And quit looking for a shortcut on everything. Just do the right thing. Show up for work. Work your butt off while you're at work.
Starting point is 00:50:09 And people will notice because that alone is unusual. And just become a man of extreme integrity. And that would be my prescription for you. If you want to call them and say, all right, guys, I owe you this. I did this deal when I was 18. I know you probably got 70 or 100 or whatever on it. What will you take? I'll write you a check today if you'll make me a deal.
Starting point is 00:50:30 And then just they're probably, they might say 50. 50 would actually be a good deal for them. And then the next time you get ready to buy a car, be a grown-up, write a check for the car by a father of two car. which a hellcat would not be on the list. Okay. And, you know, and pay cash for it and get a title and go get tags on it and be like a functioning part of society. And then that leads you towards being able to grow and to function and to win.
Starting point is 00:51:07 Dave and I started working here, right? All this was new to me. And I kept going to these meetings about the Deloni brand. And I remember after the third of four. meeting, I kind of threw a little fit. And I was like, guys, I don't want a brand. I don't like that idea. I don't like that word. I don't want that. And Tim Newton, who does all of that here globally here at Ramsey, is one of the most amazing minds I've ever been around. He said, John, all a brand is is who you are when you're not in the room. What do people think about you? How do they feel about you?
Starting point is 00:51:41 What do they know about you when you're not in the room? And that changed me. And I want Andrew, when he's not in the room, there in Louisville, Kentucky, I want everyone to know, oh, that guy is a man of integrity. He's a stand-up dude. That guy, we can count on that guy. He's a great dad. He's always going to pay his good. He's a good dad.
Starting point is 00:51:59 He's a wonderful neighbor. Yes. He serves. That's who that you are when you're not in the room because of how present and generous you are when you are in the room. Be that guy. When you've saved up and paid cash for a reliable used car, you want that thing to last. And the best way to keep it running for the long haul is to take care of it with people you
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Starting point is 00:54:16 I'm good, Dave. How are you? Thank you for having me on the show, Dave and John. Sure. What's up? I'm wondering if you can settle a long debate between my boyfriend and I. Yes. Yes.
Starting point is 00:54:26 I love these. We both own our separate homes and we have our separate home expenses. But he stays. at my house about four nights a week. And our debate is, like, should he contribute to rent or some household expenses? And he feels that he shouldn't. How old are you, too? I'm 62, and he's 51.
Starting point is 00:54:48 Why are you not married? No. Why? Because we've both been married before, and he doesn't want to get married. And he doesn't want to pay any expenses. No. But he wants to sleep there. Yes.
Starting point is 00:55:04 Yes, he believes he takes me out to dinner like once a week, and that's good. Yeah, you missed the point, I guess. I just went straight over here. No, I get it. I get it, yes. Hmm, okay. Why are you settling for this? Because it works for me, I guess.
Starting point is 00:55:23 It doesn't. That's why you're calling. Well, we've fought over it for years. Yeah. You should stop that. Yeah. The fighting part. You should decide and end it.
Starting point is 00:55:39 And the relationship or end? No, I'm just saying in the fight. I don't fight over something for years. I just either get in or I get out of the fight, and I'm not going to, I'll lose the fight or win the fight or something, but I'm not going to, we're done. We're done talking about this. Years? Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:56 Like you're all your pet hobby. How long have you been dating? About six years. Oh, good grief. Okay. Okay, so the truth is the way I answer questions on the show is I try to think about what I would do if I were in your situation. And I can't put myself there because I wouldn't be in your situation. I would get married if I were you guys or I wouldn't move on. I'd break up with somebody who disrespects me so much. Yeah. They want to sleep with me, but they don't want to marry me. So yeah. But so I can't put my, I'm having trouble honestly answering your question. I'm not trying to make a job. judgment on you. I'm just trying to say, I can't put myself in your shoes. I can't make that work. So can I throw something in here, Dave? I think he has his expenses. You have your expenses,
Starting point is 00:56:43 and I think you lose the argument. Then you decide if you want him to sleep there or not. But you have your house. He has his house. You can be over at his house or you can be at your house. Well, we can't be at his house. Why? Because he lives twice as far from our jobs. and I have dogs and he doesn't want dogs in his house and obviously I can't leave them here. Okay, that actually brings me closer to a question I have. I think I'm right on something. I think you're asking him to spend money on expenses. That is your workaround to more emotional connection with this guy.
Starting point is 00:57:26 What do you mean by that? I mean, I don't think this is about dollars and cents. I think this is about are we doing this thing together or not? and he is being very clear. We are not doing this together. I don't do dogs and I don't do marriage and I don't pay your expenses. I take you out to dinner. There's a lot of things he doesn't do.
Starting point is 00:57:44 Yeah. Yeah, I think, Dave, this is less about money and this is more about, like, he won't do my dogs. He won't marry me. He won't make a long-term commitment. So I'm going to go around this way and see if I can squeeze some emotional connection by you're participating in the bills, you're participating in the rhythm of the house. Some sign of commitment.
Starting point is 00:58:08 Some sign that we're doing this thing together. And he's super clear. Behavior's a language. We are not together. I sleep with you when I'm at your house. I get what I want. I then go to my and do my life by myself privately in my own way.
Starting point is 00:58:23 That's a huge, I mean, there's red flags all over. And you're okay with that arrangement. Yeah. And that's your decision. Yes. Be a grown up and stop fighting about it. Just say this is the way this is going to be and I'm accepting it and I'm going to move on, I'm not going to choose to be miserable.
Starting point is 00:58:35 If you're going to stay in this relationship, I think he wins the argument. Yes. I agree. Yeah. I think you have your expenses. He has his expenses, and I'm not going to charge him for a booty call. And then you get, yeah, you get to decide whether you want to continue in this expense arrangement. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:53 Yeah. That's what's going on. I mean, it's nice. I don't want to be that person. I don't want to be any these people. But, yeah. All right. Natalie is in Boston.
Starting point is 00:59:02 Hey, Natalie, what's up? Hi, I am just wondering if I should go after my ex-husband's 401K. For what? Unpaid child support. He hasn't paid me in about 11 years. We've been divorced 11 years. Why haven't you done something before now? It's a little complicated.
Starting point is 00:59:27 He's been in and out of prison, and I don't know. I guess I've tried to file with the state that I live in, and they basically told me you can't squeeze money from Iraq. There's been times he's been on the street, and he's in and out of jail for domestic violence and drug charges. And I think he forgot that this exists because I think he would have cleaned it out, if had he known. And, yeah, so that's where I'm at. So you found it. He had something sent in the mail, and I thought I opened it. Yes.
Starting point is 01:00:06 Okay. And how much is in it? About 60,000. Okay. And how much are you owed? Over 100,000. Okay. How long has it been since you talked to your divorce attorney?
Starting point is 01:00:22 I didn't have one. I think he magically thought that if he didn't show up to court, that we wouldn't get divorced. He didn't want the divorce. So 11 years ago, I just, I did it myself and got granted the divorce and got sole custody. When's the last time you talked to him? Last year, every year, he'll kind of call and be under the influence and try to say he wants to see the kids or something, but it's not really a, do you need this money? Or are you mad? Sort of. I guess I'm just mad.
Starting point is 01:01:00 I'm engaged to be married to a wonderful man in June. He doesn't want to wake the beast. He said he's left us, left me alone for the past few years for the most part, besides that occasional once a year call or so. I like him. Dave may disagree with me. I agree with your, I agree with your fiancé, too. You do?
Starting point is 01:01:20 Because I think you saw this number and you got really pissed off, rightfully so. And you felt that you remembered a decade of grinding it out, three jobs, not seeing your kids. You remember all that came to the surface immediately. Right. And you want to start this whole thing over and you remember how halacious the divorce was when he wasn't responding to anything. He was like, yeah, I dare the sheriff to come kick me out. He's a bad dude. He's not a good guy. No, he's not a good guy. So I, yeah. And lastly, I'll tell you is, I don't know the answer to the legal question and you'd have to find someone that does know the answer, like an attorney, if you wanted to ask someone. But as I'm, I don't know the answer. I don't know. I understand it, a 401k cannot be touched by a lawsuit. I know that part is true. I don't know if that is true on child support, if that allowed child support would violate that or not.
Starting point is 01:02:11 And so I'm not sure you can get to it anyway. Right. If you want to put that part to peace in your mind and go, well, I can't get it anyway, then unless he voluntarily pulls it out and gives it to me, you can make his life miserable like it didn't already until he made it, until he pulled it out and gave it to you. But, um, or you can take the cinder block that is him out of your backpack for good.
Starting point is 01:02:34 Yeah, just, just walk away. You've got a good new guy that you're marrying with. You're going to create a whole new life. Your kids are stable and healthy because of the, the awesomeness of the last 10 years, the grinding and, and just making it all work that you've done the last 10 years. Yep. Man, choose peace over this one. That, that'd be my opinion. You can go burn him to the ground, but you're going to get, you're going to get burned, too.
Starting point is 01:02:52 Yeah. The fire's hot. And I don't think you can get to mine anyway. I'm not sure. I don't know if you can get it or not in a 401k with child support. But if it was a regular lawsuit, I can tell you, you can't get it. It's not accessible. It's accessible on a divorce.
Starting point is 01:03:08 A divorce attorney or a divorce lawyer, probate can make you split up a 401k in the process of a divorce. So they may be able to do it on child support. I don't know. But I think overall, you don't need it and you sure don't need him around. So I'm with your, I'm with your fiancé and John. I love entrepreneurs. Don't forget, guys. I started my company on a card table myself, so I know what it's like to have people counting on you,
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Starting point is 01:06:14 Evelyn is in Atlanta. Hi, Evelyn. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? Okay, so I'm 24 years old and I've been working since I've been 15. I haven't built any real savings and I put all of my expenses on a credit card. I have like $2,000 to $3,000 that I spend a month on my credit card.
Starting point is 01:06:41 And after I pay that off, I pay it off on $4 every month, but after I pay it off, I only have like $100 to $200 left. I basically live paycheck to paycheck and I've been living like that ever since I started working and I do I use the college savings that my parents had for me as a down payment for a duplex and I rented out but whenever big repairs come up I have to borrow money from them to pay it off and I just want to stop doing that I want to break the cycle and start saving money stop using my credit card and just breaking the bad habits of spending money like It's no tomorrow.
Starting point is 01:07:20 So you make about $3,000 a month? I make, like, yeah. Like, yeah, $3,000, $4,000. Okay, but you said you put $2,000 on the card. I put, it's usually my, every time my, my, it's usually like $3 in the around there on the credit card. Like, I put all in my expenses there. I work for a living.
Starting point is 01:07:46 I work for the post office. Mm-hmm. Okay. Mm-hmm. And what's the duplex worth? I got it with equity, so I got it with 20-10 equity. It's worth $250 right now. And what do you owe on it?
Starting point is 01:08:02 Basically $2.30. Mm-hmm. Okay. So it's really not a big blessing. It's more of a curse. I would say, yeah. It costs you money. It doesn't make you money.
Starting point is 01:08:16 Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Sell it. You think? Well, I'm trying, I'm wanting to use that as like a retirement plan. It's not a retirement plan.
Starting point is 01:08:27 It's draining money. It's not adding money. It sucks. Money. I mean, I get rental income from it. Honey, it costs you more than it makes you. Yeah. Evelyn, the only way you can go forward here is to exhale and say what I've been doing is not working.
Starting point is 01:08:47 I'll try something else. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And what do you guys, like, suggest? Like, the truth is I understand I have a spending problem. And, like, I don't think you do. I think you have a systems problem. I think the system you're using to handle money sucks.
Starting point is 01:09:04 So what would be wrong with just cutting up your credit card and paying cash for things? No, nothing, honestly. I think I've just done it so long. I know, but just let's try something new. This sucks. You called me because it wasn't working. So cut up your credit card. Take your paycheck, turn it into money, pay cash for your groceries, put some money in a checking account, and use a debit card or whatever to pay your light bill, pay your landlord.
Starting point is 01:09:32 I assume you're renting. No, I actually live with my parents. Oh, okay. Yeah. Okay. So you don't have any overhead, and you have $3,000 a month coming in. You got a car payment? No, actually.
Starting point is 01:09:45 I don't have any debt, actually. Other than the duplex. Yeah. Uh-huh. Okay. Yeah. I mean, what if you cut up your credit card and just took your paycheck and used it to live on? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:59 It's the same thing. It's the same thing you're doing. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, jump on the app store and get the every dollar app and put it on your phone and say, I got this much coming in at $3,200 coming in this month, and I'm going to give every one of those dollars a name.
Starting point is 01:10:17 if you want something different than you have now, you're going to have to do something different than you do now. And right now, I'm listening to you, and I've been coaching people with money for 35 years, and your duplex idea is broken. It sucks. It's taking money from you. It's not adding money to you.
Starting point is 01:10:37 And you're living like a 12-year-old in terms of how you're handling money. You just spend it until it's gone, and then you're not, you have no emotional connection to it, whatsoever. I'm asking you to be an adult, step back, and get over the top of the money and tell the money what to do. Before the month begins, on the every dollar app, make every one of those dollars behave, and then go do that exact thing with that money, and you're going to be no worse off. You're actually going to be better off because you're going to be in control of it, and right now,
Starting point is 01:11:06 you just spend until you run out, and you're stuck at your parents' house at 24 years old. And so on top of that, on top of your post office job, I want you to go get a second job. 24, you're unattached, you're living at home, go get a second job so you can start earning more money than just three or four grand a month, and you can sock that money away, begin to build yourself an emergency fund, begin to build yourself a financial cushion so you can get your own place one day. Right now is the time to work like crazy. Get your own life as soon as possible. As soon as possible. Hannah is with us in Newark, New Jersey. Hey, Hannah, what's up? Hello, Dave and John. Thank you for taking my call.
Starting point is 01:11:49 Sure. How can we help? My question is about charge-off and how long they stay on the credit report? Seven years from date of last activity. Okay. All right. So I have one in which it's recorded that on my credit report, I paid it all. I paid my last payment, not paid it off, but my last payment was in May of 2019,
Starting point is 01:12:20 and that's exactly the same month and year. They closed it. Closing it doesn't matter. The last date you paid on it or used it in any way, the last date there was any activity on the account. Seven years later, it will not be on your credit bureau report. Spoiler alert. All right. Spoiler alert.
Starting point is 01:12:41 That doesn't matter. They still will sue you. Whether it's on your credit bureau report or not, doesn't matter. It's still a legal debt. Dropping off your credit bureau report does not help you. It only helps you go borrow more money. Well, I'm not interested in borrowing anymore. That's what I mean.
Starting point is 01:13:04 That's why Dave says it doesn't matter. But I just wondering, but I would just wondering how long it takes to come off. And you said seven last. Seven years from the date of last activity. and they could choose to do a report on it and start the seven years over because an activity coming from them is also activity. So what kind of debt is this? Okay, well, it was credit card debt. Okay, and how much is it?
Starting point is 01:13:33 It's like $6,000 something. And what do you make a year? $50,000. Okay, do you have any money at all? No, not right now. Not right now. I'm trying to save up. If it drops off in May, and I don't think it will probably,
Starting point is 01:13:52 usually they download the data on the credit bureaus once a quarter. And so May would be the seven-year date, and sometime in the following quarter, it might drop off. Okay? And if you called them and offered them $500 cash as settlement in full, they might take it. And that would clear up the debt. But it wouldn't be paid in full.
Starting point is 01:14:21 It's settled in full, and it'll be on your credit bureau as settled, a bad debt that was settled for seven more years. Doesn't keep you from doing anything, but it does keep you from getting another credit card, hopefully, for a while anyway. But that'll get it actually out of your life to settle it with them. And super old credit card debt, they will settle for pennies on the dollar. Get it in writing, and do not give them electronic access to your checking account, if you're going to do that.
Starting point is 01:15:35 Corey is in Baltimore. Hi, Corey. How are you? I'm well, Dave. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? Trying to figure out if it would be a good idea
Starting point is 01:15:49 or if it's morally okay to accept a position at a job knowing that I may be moving to another state or area as early as July and as late as December. Okay. What kind of a position
Starting point is 01:16:05 are you talking about accepting? So I would be transferring from my current, I work within a school, and I would be transferring to another building within the district. But I don't want to take another, I don't want to accept another position knowing that I may be gone as early as July. I heard that. What kind of a position are you talking about? You're asking me if it's morally acceptable to do this. What is it? I'm a school social worker.
Starting point is 01:16:34 Okay. So if you take this, you're going to move from one school to another as a social worker. Yes. Okay. And so, well, a good way to test ethics is very simple. Treat other people like you'd want to be treated. So the supervisor and the principal at that school where you would be going, if you were sitting in their seat, how would you want to be treated?
Starting point is 01:17:03 Corey to handle this. I would want somebody who is being forward with me and, you know, is being honest about the fact that it may happen or it may not happen. Yeah, so what is it dependent upon? What would cause the move to happen? Accepting a job in that area. So you're continuing to look for a different job while you took the new job, but in a different state? Yeah, we were looking to relocate in December. My family and I. Oh.
Starting point is 01:17:41 Is your wife have a job? Yes, she does. In the new place? No. So we're both looking to relocate, but that's kind of what is delaying us now because we haven't found anything in that area yet. I would take the job. The chances of this all working out on this timeline that you've imagined is slimmed and none right now. neither one of you have a new job in the new place yet are you a finalist for a job in a new place
Starting point is 01:18:08 no it's just uh she's from that area so she were wanting to move back down so right now it's just a discussion yeah so where did you where you actually talk to anyone about being hired there yet yeah where'd you come up with july or or December we've um been applying places but we haven't gotten anything back. But, yeah, we've been pretty active about it, but haven't heard anything back. Well, the answer to your question, you answered the question yourself. The answer to your question, is it morally acceptable to take the new job? The answer is yes, if you tell them.
Starting point is 01:18:44 I think we might move, but I'm not sure yet. And I want to give you a heads up on that before you give me this position. And then based on that, they have to make their decision as to whether they want you or not. in this school district, would that conversation cost you your job? I don't think it would cost me my current job. What about the new one? It could potentially cost me the new one. Okay.
Starting point is 01:19:12 Then stay where you are. Is the new and more money on a promotion of any sort, or is it just a different location? It would be a better work environment. Yeah. Okay. Well, I think you just have to be up front. I mean, that's how I would want to be treated.
Starting point is 01:19:28 if I was the principal at the new place, I don't want to go to the trouble of onboarding a guy, going through all the paperwork, crap, everything else, knowing he's going to be gone in six months, and he didn't tell me. Yeah. If you were going to work for a company in an executive-type role, I 100% wouldn't hire you.
Starting point is 01:19:52 But if you're going to work for the local coffee shop as a barista, will they turn over like yesterday's underwear anyway? So it doesn't matter, right? So it depends on the environment that you're going into is high turnover situation. If you're going to work at Home Depot as a clerk, they're not expecting you to be there in six months anyway. But here you're kind of making a commitment. So the people you're making a commitment to need to make their decision based on the actual knowledge of what's going on. Otherwise, yeah, you're misleading them and that is unethical.
Starting point is 01:20:26 I agree with your – I think your conundrum – I think your heart was already telling you that, wasn't it? Yeah. Yeah. That's why you asked the question. You wouldn't ask the question if you didn't have any conscience about it. But I would also say, like, I'm trying to imagine, I worked in education for 20 years. If somebody came and sat down and said, hey, thank you so much for this opportunity. I want to be honest with you.
Starting point is 01:20:46 My wife wants to move back to be around her family. We haven't found anything. We haven't found anything. That might happen someday. It's going to take us both getting jobs. It might be six months. It might be six years. But I just want to put that on the table that we do have a family vision of going back home one day.
Starting point is 01:21:01 I would say, I want you on my team for that level of integrity, and I would take the gamble probably. It's not all going to work out in six months. And so if you're a great social worker, man, there's going to be schools lining up for you to come work for them. So, yeah, be honest, but also tell the whole story. And then let the chips fall where they fall. You tell the story, and then you can sleep at night. You go, okay, they didn't want me because of that. I'll stay where I am.
Starting point is 01:21:28 Fair. And so the price of me, the price of my integrity is I get to stay in this place, this less good environment. Sure. While I look for a new job in another state. That's right. Yeah. And that's always, always, always, always when you get to the end of your life, a good thing that you did it.
Starting point is 01:21:48 Jaden is in Oklahoma. Hi, Jaden. How are you? Hi, there. I'm very well. How about you? Better than I deserve. What's up?
Starting point is 01:21:58 Hey, well, I'm curious about if I'm being maybe a cheap skate about buying an engagement ring. Yes. 75 cents, Dave and Busters, turn the knob, brother. If you have to ask the question, you are. No, I'm kidding. I'm messing with you. So what are you thinking about spending? Right now, I'm thinking about $4,000.
Starting point is 01:22:21 Okay, and what do you make a month? In a month, I make $5. Okay. that's okay with me that's not cheap skating i tell i tell people no more than a month's income the jewelry store tells you three months income but they sell jewelry Kelly's producing the show right here she just passed out you don't like that Kelly um she wants about seven or eight months wow okay so here's the thing there is no direct
Starting point is 01:22:49 correlation between the length and quality of the marriage to the expense of the ring as a matter of fact there might be an inverse correlation that the more expensive of the ring, the less likely you are to actually make it. Where is this cheap skate idea coming from? You or from her? Or your buddies? It's more from her. She's done some really beautiful rings. I'm more on like the 6, 7, 8 kind of range, but we're both still in debt, and I'm just trying to figure it out. All right, have you, have you, okay? Well, the difference in 4 and 6 is not a deal breaker one way or the other. No. But have you had that conversation with her?
Starting point is 01:23:21 Yeah, she said she wants to say. Yes, yeah, we've sat down. No, the conversation underneath the conversation. about, hey, we both owe a bunch of money, and I know you, I would love to be able to buy you an $8,000 in the ring. I don't have that kind of money. Do you want me to save up and give you this, like, have you all had that conversation? Maybe not in the way you're posing it. If you can have that conversation, it'll set you up to have a great marriage for the rest of your life. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:23:46 Because that's marriage right there, being able to have the question that is actually the question beneath the thing y'all are fighting about. And here's the thing. It doesn't have to be forever either. It's one ring. So Sharon's is a, her engagement, brings a point two, three. Means you can't even find it with a magnifying glasses so stinking small. Man, talk about she bought low. Point she bought low. Two, three. She R-Ied that one, man.
Starting point is 01:24:10 Yeah. Well, guess what? The thing she wears on her hand now is causing carpretonal syndrome. So, um, I only have one working eye because I look directly at it one time. Like a spotlight that you bring in Hollywood actors with. That's exactly right. But yeah. But the, uh, but yeah, we traded to the point two three in, and it's in the safe.
Starting point is 01:24:27 if we kept it for sentimental reasons, but not for value reasons. And it's worked for 44 years. So, yeah, I think the conversation around it, Jaden, is more than the cost. Yes. It's more important than the actual cost in this situation. So, but somewhere around a month and four to six is somewhere around a month. You're right. If you told me 18,000, now we've got a different problem.
Starting point is 01:24:50 Now you're in Kellyville, and that's a whole different level of drama. Oh, oh, oh. Welcome back to the Ramsey Show. in the Fair Winds Credit Union Studios. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host, Dr. John Deloney. Ramsey Personality, number one best-selling author, is my co-host today. Ray is in San Jose, California. Hi, Ray.
Starting point is 01:25:51 How are you? It's such an honor to talk to you. You too? I have a question. I am, well, a little backstory. I'm 36, newly married. I'm working on the dead snowball, trying to get my and my husband's new life in order. And I have a uncle who is 78 years old.
Starting point is 01:26:10 here in California, who has asked me to be the executor of his will. In that, he said he wants to bless me with his rental property in Arizona in that will. It sounds great right off the bat, but I know you're the expert on real estate, and I just, while he's still here with us, is there anything that I should be prepared of? I don't want to walk into a rude awakening when he passes. and, you know, if there's $8,000 left on the mortgage or any repairs or taxes, and here I'm trying to clean up my life, and I get stuck in a bear trap. Okay.
Starting point is 01:26:51 Does he own a lot of other assets as well? He has kind of like an elderly mobile home that he's leaving to a nephew of his, and so I kind of looked in the wheel, and I said, you know, Uncle, if there is a mortgage, left, which is $8,000 as of today, how would that be taking care of? And he said, well, I would want you to use the money in my bank account. And I said, well, that's not in your will. So the good news is we have a meeting with his estate planner in May. And so I kind of just wanted to call on this show and get my debts in order to... So he's going to give you the property. What was he going to do with the money in his checking
Starting point is 01:27:32 account? Who was going to receive that in his will? With the mobile home was going to be the nephew. Oh, okay. So that's the property. So the mobile, nephew would get the checking account and the mobile home. The house in Arizona, does it have a mortgage? It does. There's $8,000 as of today left on it. Oh, that's the $8,000. So there's no money coming to you currently to pay off that mortgage?
Starting point is 01:27:56 Correct. From what he's saying is, oh, just use the money in my bank account. And I said, well, you'd have to leave me the money in your bank account. Right. So I'm like, let me call Dave and get my stuff. So the will needs to state that the cash, that $8,000 cash comes to you. Other cash and any other cash above $8,000, and the mobile home go to the other nephew, your cousin, I take it.
Starting point is 01:28:23 And then you have a paid-for house that you're receiving. Do you have any idea what this house is worth? Right now it looks like $300,000. Okay. It's a wonderful gift. I've never been to Arizona. Well, you're going to sell it. You're going to sell it right after.
Starting point is 01:28:38 he dies. Correct. Yeah. And you're going to use it to have your life, you and your new husband's life, and you're going to pay off whatever debt you've got and or build wealth for you and your kids and your husband, and you're going to go forward. We do not need a rental property in Arizona. So an executor, if you look at the word executor, it has built into it the word execute. Correct. So your job, if you're the executor, is to execute what the will says. So you're very, wise to do what you're doing and make sure that you agree with what the will says and that is there the only other question I've got is who's going to be pissed off that's got nothing he doesn't have a wife or any kids it's just this um this nephew and myself that he says he could
Starting point is 01:29:30 trust what about your mom or dad whoever's his brother uh mom or dad whoever he's a second uncle so um My dad. My dad isn't left anything. Is that going to be a problem between you two? Let's be real, probably. Okay. Then you all need to talk about that before he dies. Yeah. He needs to tell your dad that I'm leaving this to your daughter and I'm leaving this to your nephew.
Starting point is 01:30:04 Correct, correct. Because I don't want you to inherit drama. Your job is not to execute drama. Your job is to execute his wishes in the will. and sometimes people don't, they piss people off after they die rather than while they're alive. And so that's the case here. So I would make this to where it's a slam dunk. There's no question.
Starting point is 01:30:24 Nobody's mad. If you're going to be mad at somebody, you need to be mad at the uncle while he's alive. Right. Yeah. Not you. You didn't do anything. I appreciate that. Last question.
Starting point is 01:30:36 So when this property comes in and sold and it's paid off, then the only thing that comes out of the sale is the taxes of Arizona or any repairs to get this property up to date so it can fail and the real estate agent gets their half and we call it a day? Yep, not their half, but they get a commission, yes. Yes, okay. And there is no income tax on this. If you inherit it at death and sell it within six months, market value is the basis, so you won't have any income tax.
Starting point is 01:31:08 Oh, I didn't have reset the basis. Yep, stepped up basis on death. I did not know that. So she's not going to have to pay capital gains tax on it at all. If she holds it for five years and it goes up to $600,000, then pay taxes on the $300. The increase, check. Excellent. I didn't know that.
Starting point is 01:31:22 Okay. Yeah, if you sell it within six months, it's proposed, it's supposed that you, that you sold it for market value and at time of death. Dave, would you sell it right away? Yes. Instantly. Okay. You don't want to be a landlord. Okay.
Starting point is 01:31:37 Thank you. There's no point that you had $300,000 piled in the middle of your table with the kitchen table and you went and bought a rental house in Arizona. In a state you've never been to. Yeah, that's not even a not even a possibility. So, you know, and that's reverse engineering, which is called a sunk cost analysis and that tells you don't do it. Don't keep it. Don't keep it. Don't keep it. This is why people keep it. We moved from Atlanta to Chicago and kept our house as a rental. That's a landlord by default. And that always is a recipe for bad things to happen like someone changing their Harley oil in your living room.
Starting point is 01:32:14 That's when this kind of crap happens right there. That's exactly what happens. Bad idea. Bad idea. So, yeah, you're, Ray, you're approaching this with a lot of wisdom. You're the executor. You're going to have to execute, and you've already realized that what's in the will, and there wasn't money to pay off your house because the will didn't state what happened
Starting point is 01:32:36 to the checking account money. And so now you're having that reworked with the lawyer. That's wise I would also just ask your uncle to call your dad and say, hey, I don't want you to be mad at anybody. I'm leaving this to your daughter and you need to be happy for her. And your uncle can do that and it'll keep your dad from getting himself twisted. And if he wants to get twisted, he can do it now instead of at you later and you don't get into all kinds of drama over a tiny little estate of an old trailer plus 300 grand. But Dave, we've taken the call where she's going to get. get 300 grand from the sale of this house and dad's going to be knocking on the door saying,
Starting point is 01:33:14 where's my cut? I want some. Yeah. That should have been mine. That should have been mine. After all, I've done for you and all that stuff starts. So you got to go ahead and just nip it in the bud. Nip it, nip it, nip it in the bud.
Starting point is 01:33:27 I love what you say, Dave. If you need to have a hard conversation about your will, have the courage to do it while you're still alive. Don't be a coward. Yeah. When I talk to people on the Ramsey show, 90% of the problems I hear come down to one thing, not having a plan. They're not living on a budget. They have no idea where their money's going. Money is just happening to them instead of them happening to their money. And guys, that is so
Starting point is 01:34:37 normal, but it doesn't have to be normal for you. And that's why I want you to go download our every dollar budget app. Every dollar not only helps you tell your money where to go with a budget. It also builds a plan to free up extra money so you can pay debt off faster and start building wealth. And the best part, your plan is completely personalized to your life. It's the same advice that you would get if you call the show. And it's right in your pocket. So don't keep living normal. Go download the every dollar app, answer a few questions, and get your plan today.
Starting point is 01:35:12 The Ramsey Show Question of the Day is brought to you by Y Refi. Defaulted private student loans don't fix themselves, but you can fix them. Why Refi helps your refinance into a low fixed rate payment that fits your budget. budget. So you can get back on the baby steps and move forward. Go to Y-R-R-E-F-I-com slash Ramsey. That's the letter Y-R-E-F-Y.com slash Ramsey might not be in all states. Today's question comes from Brittany and Rhode Island. Brittany writes, my in-laws are very wealthy, but they did not save a single dollar for their kids' college expenses and they will leave them a large inheritance when they pass away. They've told my husband and his siblings to
Starting point is 01:36:05 expect to each receive close to four million dollars after they pass. away. And my husband has over $40,000 in student loans. Should I be happy that my husband will receive an inheritance later in life instead of having help now? Or is it okay to be annoyed that this debt could have been avoided if they had planned for their college differently? All right, here's what I want you to do, Brittany. I want you to go outside in the garage and open the car door in the garage and put your hand in it and just slam the door repeatedly because that's about as useful as you spending one second of thought or energy or feelings over this matter. It just is what it is what it is.
Starting point is 01:36:46 They made a decision that they wanted their kids to pay for their own college, and they get to do that. And because Dave, I guess she could be annoyed all she wants, but it's just a waste of time and energy and stories. You're going to get $4 million when they pass away. Assuming you're still married. Exactly, exactly. I don't know why anyone would spend a second of energy over this. His parents made a choice and they clearly have done well for themselves financially. When you married your husband, you knew he had $40,000 in student loan debt and you knew his mom and dad. You just didn't know the numbers around it. Yeah. Pay it off. Move on. And so just love them where they are. They're your husband's parents and they're not, they don't do things the way you would do them. And welcome to in-laws. And, you know, you know, No, it's not okay to be annoyed. Mind your own business.
Starting point is 01:37:39 Yeah, mind your business. Mind your own business. And take care of you and your husband and don't worry about what other people do. You spend all your time being annoyed about what somebody else should do. If I had $4 million, this is what I would do. You don't have $4 million, so it's not a problem for you. And you don't get to make this choice. So you make choices based on what you want to do in your future.
Starting point is 01:38:01 And you don't know, Brittany, that his parents didn't have three friends whose parents paid for their college, and they watched their buddies do a bunch of drugs and get kicked out of school, and they told themselves from a place of value. We want our kids to have skin in the game when they go to college, and your husband chose to take out student loans instead of cash flow in it.
Starting point is 01:38:20 And so if you're going to be mad at somebody, be mad at him about it. But you don't know why they made the decisions they made, and they're about to give you all $4 million. When they die. Relax. Yeah. Well, I don't even care if you get that or not.
Starting point is 01:38:32 Choose joy, man. Yeah, I'm just, just, This is work on controlling people that you can control. Which is you. And there's one of them. It's the one in your mirror. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:38:48 And just move on. Oh, my gosh. No, I think you've got mother-in-law trouble and you're trying to get a logical reason why you're mad at your mother-in-law. See, I think she's got, she's pissed off that they have to pay back this student loan money. No, she just pissed off at her mother-in-law in general, and then this gives her a reason to be. Yeah, that's, that's no. Yeah, handle your business and get on by your life. Be grateful.
Starting point is 01:39:11 Go, let it go. Frozen. Just let it go. Dave's favorite movie and soundtrack. Glenn is in Anchorage, Alaska. Hey, Glenn, what's up? Hey, so I am self-employed and I have a variable income. So I was wondering how many years I should stay self-employed if I noticed with the economy
Starting point is 01:39:34 that my income is not enough to save for retirement. Well, the variable is not the problem. The problem is it's not enough. My income's variable, but I'm fine. Yeah. So the problem is not variable. The problem is you don't make enough, right? Yes.
Starting point is 01:39:57 I mean, you have an occasional bonanza month, and then the rest of the month are just dry beans. And the total is still not. not enough to live on? It's enough to live on, but not to put away for retirement. Oh, that's living. You have to plan for retirement or you eat dog food. So I got a plan for retirement.
Starting point is 01:40:18 That's part of living. So what do you make? What are you self-employed? So you file your taxes. What is the profit of the business that you pay taxes on each year? So currently with the assets that I've Assets are not profit What is the profit of the business
Starting point is 01:40:40 That your tax return would show me if I opened it up So taxes are showing a negative But the Like what goes in my baking cow is So last year was positive 13,000 The year before that Okay the problem is you're living at the poverty level sir, you need a job.
Starting point is 01:41:01 Okay. You're not making enough money to eat on. That's the thing. So if your income taxes are showing negative, there's a reason, because you didn't make any money. And then what amounts to says you got some depreciation or something that you're taking, and that allows you to cash flow 13K, but overall your assets are going down probably more than 13K, or you wouldn't be getting that depreciation. So you're really not making a living.
Starting point is 01:41:23 And if you can't see a way to triple that or quadruple that in the next two years, you're next two years, then you need to close this and go get a position where somebody will pay you 40, 50, 60,000 dollars a year. You're going to feel rich if you had that happen. If you made a below average income, you'd feel rich compared to what you're making now. So it's not the volatility. It's the lack of income overall. And that's the thing you do. So my friend Henry Cloud wrote a book called Necessary Endings. He said, we end something, a job, a business, a relationship, a whatever, we end something when we lose hope that it's going to get better in the future. And so if you're married to an alcoholic who you lose hope that they're actually going to get healed,
Starting point is 01:42:10 that they're actually going to get dry and sober, you lose hope, then you have to end that relationship. Because you can't continue to pour into the crazy world. In your case, you have to end this business because we've lost hope for many years you've been doing this and for many years you've been starving to death doing it. And unless you really can tell me there's a reason that I'm going to make 40,000 and not 13,000, I'm going to make 50,000 and not 13,000 showing on my taxes that I really made that in real money, unless you see that, then you need to close this and get a job.
Starting point is 01:42:46 And I think you probably need to close it and get a job. That's what it sounds like. It's tough to do, though. Mark's in Greenville, South Carolina. Hey, Mark, what's up? Hey guys, thanks so much for taking the time, take my call. I've got a little bit of a question about income and kind of providing for my family for the future. Long story short, my wife and I are missionaries who have come off the field and we're transitioning back to the States.
Starting point is 01:43:12 My wife is, we have two kids, 14 and 12. My wife is disabled and she's not really able to hold down a job consistent. but she's also, unfortunately, in the position where she doesn't qualify for disability. I just graduated from nursing school, did a two-year program, and I'll be wondering a new job here. And my take-home pay every month is right around $4,000. We're able to live because of the generosity of a local ministry here that provides housing to missionaries who are transitioning to and from the field. So it's low-cost rent, basically, so that we're able to kind of live. As I look forward...
Starting point is 01:43:57 Nursing school, did you get an LPN and you pass your bars? RN. It's a registered nurse. Okay, so why are you making so little? That's an $80,000 to a $95,000 of your job, and you're making $48. Well, it's about the highest offer I got, which is the highest, the hospital system that pays the most, is right about $70,000. a year. To start, to start. To start, correct. Yeah, and I'm brand new. That's not $4,000 a month. That's $7,000 a month, minus taxes. Right, right. What I will, I only work 36 hours a week. So when you do the math, it's like $35 an hour times 36 hours a week, and then you factory in taxes, it's like $4,100 a month or something like that.
Starting point is 01:44:47 The great news is you've entered a wonderful career, and if you keep pushing and growing your career, you're going to go up in income dramatically. You can be making 150 within the next three years. And in the meantime, you're going to end up renting for a little while and rebuilding your lives after the mission field. But you've got a good career feel to win with. It's that time again, folks. Tax season is here. I know some of you would rather bury your head in the sand until April 15th than face.
Starting point is 01:45:24 your taxes. But here's a better idea. If your tax situation is complicated, get in touch with a Ramsey trusted tax pro today. That way, they can take the stress off your shoulders and once those tax forms come in and teach you how to keep your tax bill as low as possible. But don't wait, Ramsey trusted pros can book up fast. Go to ramsysolutions.com slash tax pro to find one who serves your area with excellence. That's ramsysolutions.com slash tax pro. Your personal and professional growth can hinge on this one thing as much as anything else. The one thing is communication skills. And the good news is that's a skill you can develop.
Starting point is 01:46:25 That's why I'm excited about this new book that I've done called Stop Talking, Start Communicating. It's now available for pre-order. And it's paired with the disc assessment. So it uses your results on the D-I-S-C assessment to help you adapt your communication style so you can build trust and connection and influence. If you think about how other people are thinking, it helps you communicate directly to them. I took this disc 40-something years ago the first time. And I took it home. I told Sharon, I said, look at this thing.
Starting point is 01:46:54 It's absolutely amazing. It's like she read it. And she's like, yeah, that's what's wrong with you. And I went, no, that is me. And we use it here at the office when we're hiring people. and we can walk up to someone's office and there's a disc, their D-I-S-C profiles on their wall right before you walk in so you know who you're talking to. So pre-order today, $3499, and you get $30 worth of pre-order items,
Starting point is 01:47:17 which includes an extra assessment, which is good for the spouse or friend and that kind of thing. So check it out, Ramsey Solutions.com slash store. Stop talking, start communicating. Scott is in Atlanta. Hey, Scott, how are you? Great. How are you, Dave? Better than I deserve.
Starting point is 01:47:35 What's up? I see on my screen, you're a baby steps millionaire, man. What's your net worth? 4.3. Way to go, man. Give me a little breakdown on that. How's that breakout category-wise? So 2.7 is retirement, which is 401's mutual funds, Ross.
Starting point is 01:47:57 725 is a house, and then 918 and other mutual funds and some common stock. Cool. How old are you? 66. 66. And how much of this $4.3 million did you inherit? My wife and I each got around $20,000 when our parents passed away. Were you already millionaires when you got that? Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay. All right, cool. So you're not millionaires because of inheritance? Not even close, yeah. So what was your career?
Starting point is 01:48:32 I was a salesperson. Okay. What about your wife? She's a retired dental, a retired. We're both retired, but she's a dental hygienist. Gotcha. Okay. You have a four-year degree? I do. I have a master's. Okay, in what? Business? Yeah, MBA. An MBA. Okay. What was your GPA?
Starting point is 01:48:53 Well, in undergraduate, it was not stellar, I'll admit to that. But in graduate school, it was 3.35. Okay, 3.35. All right, cool. All right. So you're a slight. smart, but not a genius. Okay. No, you had fun when you're at 19. Like, you're supposed to. Good for you. Good for you, man. Yeah. So do you think that if, so you're 66, you're my age, I'm 65, if someone's out there that's 25 and they're listening, do you think they can still become a millionaire starting from nothing like you did today? You bet. You know, it's, it's pay yourself first, stay employed, stay invested. Okay, because you got over half, about 60-something percent of your net worth is in your retirement account. Yes.
Starting point is 01:49:44 You're worth $4 million. Your house is $725,000. Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's not $7.2 million house. It's $725,000 house in Atlanta, Georgia. Well, I live in North Georgia, but yeah. Yeah. So you have a nice home, but it is not a mansion.
Starting point is 01:50:03 No, and when we built this house, we built during COVID, had no intentions of having that kind of house. It just turned into it because of rampant building costs for that two-year period when we were building. Yeah, yeah, okay. But the house is worth that now, easy, isn't it? It's worth seven and a quarter now, right? It is. Oh, yeah, yeah. All right.
Starting point is 01:50:28 Good, good for you. Well done. Well done. Okay, so what advice would you have for your 25-year-old self? You said that stay employed and keep investing? I think I heard. Yeah, stay employed, pay yourself first, get some term, you know, good term insurance.
Starting point is 01:50:47 What do you drive? What do you drive? Well, I just bought a brand new truck. What'd you buy? I bought a UMC to Natalie. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, we got our wife. or we got her
Starting point is 01:51:00 Honda pilot. Okay, very good. Very cool. All right. So a GMC. Denali and a Honda pilot. And you're worth $4 million. Good.
Starting point is 01:51:10 Not a Lamborghini. No. No. I've got a real fancy boat. It's a John boat. There we go. It's my favorite kind of boat. Hey, Scott,
Starting point is 01:51:21 let me ask you this. You've been a salesman, have you been a salesman your whole career? More or less. I started it, Well, I was in the Army, you know, out of college, I went in the Army. Okay. I made a whopping 12,000 a year at that time.
Starting point is 01:51:36 You know, again, that was... What's the most you ever made in your life in a year? Family, 200. Okay. So when you're a first starting out salesman, you've got real good months and real tough months. How did you have the discipline or what mindset did you have to keep investing during those times? Because those would be times, and I'd be tempted, especially when I'm younger, trying to support a family that I'm going to hold off. I got an up and down income. I'm going to hold off on the
Starting point is 01:52:02 investing. I might put some in savings when I have a really good month, but you started investing early. Yeah, I ran, believe it or not, as a young lieutenant, a Templeton salesperson showed up at my quarters and sold me some life insurance, some terms. Some terms. life insurance that I'd never heard of and a mutual fund. And, you know, and I was like, well, I don't plan. I don't have any kids. I'm not married. But, you know, if something happens and I'm in the military, I'll give my parents something.
Starting point is 01:52:41 And that sort of started the whole process, you know, the concept of monthly investments. And, you know, over the 40 years, it's been, you know, I've been to a, we, Dave and I have been to a lot of downturns in the market, and you just don't panic. Stay in. Absolutely. I love it, man. Congratulations. Congratulations, Scott. You're a baby steps millionaire and icon. You give inspiration to everybody out there listening that this still can be done. The Great American Dream is not dead. Stay off a TikTok, you know, and keep investing and keep employed, keep investing and keep employed. I think he said that like four times. Just keep working and keep investing and keep working. And then you'll look up and you can do
Starting point is 01:53:26 anything you want to do because you understand his income is off of these investments is $400,000 a year. And his highest income he ever made was $200,000. And to all the regular people, not the TikTok people, the regular people listening, I want you all to hear at $4.2, $4.2, $4.3 million, a paid $4.4.5.4.5 million, a paid four house, retired, they went to buy their fancy car and his wife got a Honda pilot, right? Like it's, like you said, it's not this fancy BMWs. And those aren't bad or wrong or anything, but there is a sense of that's a family that has, is at peace with where they are and what they are. Yeah. And it was something reliable. And I'll guarantee you she got a Honda Pilot because it's a
Starting point is 01:54:13 grandma car. It's going to be the car they drive for the rest of her life. Put the grandkids in. A lot of room. One of those grandkids is going to take that car. Probably. Probably. That Denali will be on the side of the road by the end of the weekend, but I'm just kidding. I just need to make a GMC joke there. Yeah, it didn't work. No, it's a great joke. It's a great truck. Yeah. So, folks, the bottom line, the reason we bring the baby steps millionaires on here all the time is because of 89% of America's millionaires. That's nine out of ten are millionaires not because of inheritance. Seventy-nine percent received zero. Five percent received a small amount. like five or $10,000. Another 5% received a substantial amount, but after they were already millionaires. In his case, in Scott's case,
Starting point is 01:55:00 he received a small amount after he was already a millionaire. So he did get an inheritance, but 79% and 5% and 5% is 89. That's 9 out of 10 millionaires are not millionaires because of inheritance. That's data. And if you don't agree with that fact, you're what's known as wrong.
Starting point is 01:55:23 So quit telling people that they can't do this. Compound interest and self-discipline and living on less than you make and living on a budget and being in agreement with your spouse actually freaking works. Hey guys, Dave Ramsey here. Every day on this show, we help people work through real money problems and figure out what to do next. Now you can get that same kind of help any time with Ask Ramsey. Ask your money question and get answers built on Ramsey principles we use on the show. Whether you're making a decision or just want something explained, Ask Ramsey is here to help. It's fast, simple, and free to use.
Starting point is 01:56:33 Go to Ramsey Solutions.com and try Ask Ramsey today. That's Ramsey Solutions.com. Our scripture of the day, Philippians 419, my God, will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. Our friend Art Laffer says, I never heard of a poor person spending himself into prosperity, let alone I've never heard of a poor person taxing himself into prosperity. There we go. Christopher is with us in Seattle. Hi, Christopher. How are you?
Starting point is 01:57:19 I'm doing good. How are you guys doing? Better than we deserve. What's up? Hey, so my wife and I, our total household income, is $201,000. And I am going to be running for a representative position in my district. And it does come with a $34,000 pay cut since I would be quitting my job of my current career. And so financially, I know that we can do it.
Starting point is 01:57:49 We're nearing the end of Baby Step 3. and my wife agree that I should get involved locally in our political realm here. And I'm just struggling with the mindset of the fact that we are losing $34,000, and it feels like I'm in a way letting down myself and my family. So I'm just trying to figure out how to cope with that. Are you running for a representative seat because you want to see change and you want to be that change and you want to get involved in your local community? Are you doing this to just because you hate working? No, I absolutely love my job.
Starting point is 01:58:40 But I do want to be a part of the change and to help motivate others and let everybody know that it takes all of us to create. this change. Let me ask you. I'm sorry. You're a representative of what level? The state level? Yes. Okay. Most state representatives have a full-time job. Oh, I was unaware of that. Almost everyone, all the ones I know personally have full-time jobs. They don't make much money, and they have to. Now, I don't know if that's true in the state of Washington or not. Yeah. But, um, you might want to investigate that. I'm not sure that a state representative is a full-time job. Okay.
Starting point is 01:59:27 I could definitely do that research then. I'm not sure. I mean, I know in our state, I know most of the representatives and a lot of them in our state. I know a whole bunch of them in our immediate area, certainly, and all of them have jobs. They have to because they don't make much at the state level. Christopher, you said, does your wife make 170 and you make 35? No, I make $101,000 and she makes $100,000 pretty much. Okay, so each of you make about $100,000, but you're going to drop down to $65 if you take this role.
Starting point is 02:00:01 Yes. Okay. All right. So I like the idea of bringing back, just call me old-fashioned public service being a service. It's when I'm going to, at net loss to myself, I'm going to be in service to my community. And you've got your wife's support and backing. I mean, I think it's a $165,000 household income. Yeah, nobody's starving.
Starting point is 02:00:22 I think this is a noble thing. It's a choice you made. Yeah. And nobody thrust it upon you. You don't have to do it. So there's no reason to have to cope with it emotionally. If you, if you, if you was like, if you got demoted and you lost, and you went from 100 to 65, you might have to emotionally cope with that loss.
Starting point is 02:00:43 Or if your wife was a stay-at-home wife with three kids and, you lost. and this was going to put you all, y'all couldn't pay your bills, then you'd have a hard decision to make. If you have a $165,000 income net net, I don't know that there's anything to cope with. I would spend zero seconds coping and all of my energy on being the best public servant I could be. And figuring out if this really is a full-time job. Yeah. That's the other thing. And I don't know what that means to your current career and those sorts of things.
Starting point is 02:01:09 Let me say it this way. If your identity is in a number you bring home versus value you put. provide to other people and in your relationships, you have an issue whether you're, like, you already have that issue. If your, if your identity is, I make as much money as my wife or I make this many dollars, I make this magic number called six figures. And somehow that makes me better or able to like myself more. You're going to have bigger issues across the board, brother. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that's true. Yeah. But I don't, I don't think that's what's going on. It was more like, it was, because he's really reaching to do something here. That's awesome. Yeah. Yeah. That's a noble call.
Starting point is 02:01:45 Yeah, but if it clashes with this idea that I also have to make this much money or I'm not a good husband or a good man, I think that's true. Lean into the service, man. That's fair. Josh is in Nashville. Hey, Josh. How are you? Hey, Dave. I'm doing great.
Starting point is 02:01:59 How are you doing? Better than I deserve. What's up? Yeah, I hope you'd say that. Yeah, hey, I recently moved to the Nashville area. I'm from Southern California. I'm from so many people here that I met. And, yeah, right when I moved here,
Starting point is 02:02:15 I was sort of caught off guard by my business partner saying, hey, we should sell the business. And so something I wasn't really prepared for mentally or financially. So that's something I'm kind of working through right now. In addition to that, I'm also in the process of selling a bunch of our real estate. So most of our wealth right now is in real estate just to free up more cash. And I'm not sure I can do this, but I'm trying to understand if I can create the option, to be work optional based on our assets. So just calling to see what you got out of all the real estate and now the sale of the business.
Starting point is 02:02:53 What's the big number? Yeah, so the business shouldn't let me about 1.5 and then the real estate another two. And then I have about 5.5 million. Mm-hmm, and then I have about 500 in a taxable brokerage. And then one other potential sources, liquidity could be our house. So we have about a $2.3 million house with a $700,000 note on it. So we could go downsize there as well. Or you could just pay off the note, either one.
Starting point is 02:03:24 All right, so you got like $3 million to work with, give or take, depending on what we do with the house and the note, all right? Or $4 million. You know, so, you know, if you invest that in good growth stock mutual funds, the S&P 500 has averaged 11.8% since it began. That's the stock market average, in other words. and so if you pulled off 10% off of $4 million, you'd have $400 grand. If you pulled off 8%, you'd have $320,000.
Starting point is 02:03:53 What do you need to live? Yeah, yeah. Right now, not a whole lot. Maybe $10,000, not quite $10,000, maybe $8,000 per month. Okay. So $120,000 a year, which is like your money is still growing if it's invested in mutual funds and doing nothing but sitting there. That's if you don't do anything else with business.
Starting point is 02:04:13 business and you don't do anything else with real estate. Yeah. How old are you? Part of my question. I'm 44. Yeah. Well, you need to do something. Yeah, no, I understand that.
Starting point is 02:04:24 It's not fun. Life's not fun. I mean, you're not going to have fun if you want to do something. You've been doing things your whole life. Now, do you have to be stressed out and desperate? No. But, I mean, you're an entrepreneur. You've grown businesses.
Starting point is 02:04:34 You've built wealth. It's going to take you about 13 seconds to be bored. I appreciate you saying that. Yeah, one of the, one of the, things that's kind of playing around in my head is, am I employable? Like, what could that look like to get a job? I haven't had a job since I was 24. I wouldn't.
Starting point is 02:04:53 Or 23. Last thing I would do. You know, I would just do consulting work for somebody if, you know, show somebody how to do what you know how to do. Or I'd go build a business to some kind, buy some, buy a business, start a business, or I'd buy some other real estate. But you need to put your hand to something. you know, otherwise you're just going to get fat and go fishing. And that's not a good plan. And so you're not going to be, you're not going to like yourself.
Starting point is 02:05:20 So I just, you've been doing too much. Now, again, you don't have to do 70 hours a week, 80 hours a week. But you don't need to be a Walmart grader, dude. I mean, that's not, that's not the stage. That's not who you are. And so don't do that. Don't set yourself up for that. But yeah, that's fine.
Starting point is 02:05:35 Yes, you are work optional. But in terms of the actual arithmetic, but not your spirit. Spirit is not work optional. I don't find retirement in the Bible. No, I often tell folks who are older than you by a decade or two who are retiring, who are looking for, I don't know what to do next, go spend two or three months at a local charity,
Starting point is 02:05:57 just showing up every day and serving people. And if you have the entrepreneurial mind now that you've had for the last 15, 20 years, you will spend up 15,000 ideas on people you can help, people you can love and businesses that will work to support those folks. And so that's what I would do. Yep. There's all kinds of things you can do. But you got to have a purpose. The business that wins is always serving. Always. That puts this hour of the Ramsey show in the books. We'll be back with you before you know it. In the meantime, remember, there's ultimately only one way to financial peace, and that's to walk daily with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus.

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