The Ramsey Show - Your Payments Are Keeping You From the Life You Want
Episode Date: May 22, 2026❓ Have a money question? Ask Ramsey is here to help.�...� 📈 Are you on track with the Baby Steps? Get a Free Personalized Plan. Jade Warshaw and George Kamel answer your questions and discuss: “I'm in $191,000 of student loan debt, should I pay them off or invest instead?” “We're in $38,000 of debt and expecting a baby in November, how can we best financially prepare?” “My new husband and I just moved in with his grandfather and are expected to pay his bills, how do we navigate this?” “When I asked my bank about manual underwriting they looked at me like I was crazy, what should I do?” “Should I go to college while paying off debt, even if it won't increase my income very much?” Next Steps: ✔️ Help us make the show better. Please take this short survey. 📞 Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 weekdays from 2–5 p.m. ET or send us an email. 📚 Our Memorial Day Sale is here. Get 2 books and assessments for $20. 💵 Start your free budget today. Download the EveryDollar app! 🏠 Get organized and prepared to buy or sell a home Connect With Our Sponsors: Get 10% off your first month of BetterHelp Go to Boost Mobile to switch today! If you want your car to keep going and going, trust Christian Brothers Automotive. Find a local shop and get an exclusive Ramsey discount of 10% (up to $250) off Learn more about Christian Healthcare Ministries Get started today with Churchill Mortgage Get 20% off when you join DeleteMe Go to FAIRWINDS Credit Union for an exclusive account bundle! Debt collectors hassling you? Take back control of your life at Guardian Litigation Group Find top health insurance plans at Health Trust Financial Use code RAMSEY to save 20% at Mama Bear Legal Forms Visit NetSuite today to learn more. Get started with YRefy or call 844-2-RAMSEY Visit Zander Insurance or call 1-800-356-4282 for your free instant quote today! Explore more from Ramsey Network: 💸 The Ramsey Show Highlights 🧠 The Dr. John Delony Show 🍸 Smart Money Happy Hour 💰 George Kamel 🪑 Front Row Seat with Ken Coleman 📈 EntreLeadership Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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credit union studio. This is the Ramsey show. I'm Jade Warshaw next to me, George Camel, taking
your calls for the next three hours, triple eight, eight two, five, two, two, five is what will get you
on the line. And we hope that you do choose to call in because we'd love to hear from you. All right,
George, you ready to do this? Game on. James is in Riverside, California. James, you are on the line.
How can we help today? Hello, I was calling in. I watch you guys a show a lot. I watch George's
YouTube channel. I'm just trying to figure out what's the best way to pay off payday loans.
Ooh. I have 10 altogether. That's a monster. My goodness. Yeah, no, I've seen, I've seen someone
calling about them, but never this many. Wow. How did you, let me just ask, how did you get in a
situation where you were needing to go to these places 10 different times? I had some car troubles,
a couple, maybe a little over two years ago, and I needed to pay rent.
So there was one down the street from me.
So I seen it, and I walked in there to try to get a loan, and they gave me that.
Man.
And then it spiraled into getting behind again.
So I got, end up getting another one, then another one.
So together it's four, four payday loans where I walk into a store and do it.
And then I got stuck with the ones on the apps on the phone.
So I got six of those.
Have you deleted these apps?
Like, I know you're still paying on them, but I'm scared you're going to go get an 11th one.
That's right.
Yeah, no, I got, yeah, me too.
I got all the ones I could possibly get.
So for listeners listening, we hate payday loans because, number one, most people,
they're borrowing somewhere from $100 to $1,000, right?
These are small loans, but they're usually due in a very short period of time.
Sometimes they're doing two weeks.
Sometimes they're doing four weeks.
But the main kicker...
Buy the next payday.
That's where you get the name.
The main kicker is, guys, the interest rate, the APR on these is anywhere between 300 and 600% many times.
But they don't know that because it's just a fee.
Oh, it's a $45 fee to get this small loan.
And when you actually factor in what that's costing you, no one can get out because the loan grows.
It just grows.
And by the next payday, you don't have enough to cover it.
So you go take out another one.
Right.
It's just whack-a-mole.
And so that's where James has found himself.
You borrow $500.
you add the $75 fee and now you owe $575.
Like that's bananas.
So James, how much do yours total?
Do you fall in line with this or tell me what yours are?
You want to break them down?
I love that.
The four that I go to in store, they let you borrow maximum $255, but I have to pay them back $300.
So every two weeks, I got to pay that.
So that's about $190 every two weeks, so almost $400 just on those two a month.
Wow.
And then the phones, the phone ones, I, let me see, I got it written down.
The phone ones are just different numbers.
The smallest one is 100, and I pay $5 in interest for that every two weeks.
And then the next one is $300, and I pay $13 an interest.
Next one is $350.
I pay $10.50 an interest.
The next one is 240 and I pay 35 in interest.
And then the next one is 250 and I pay 19 in interest.
Oh, my goodness.
That is...
So what's the total balances of all these 10 payday loans?
If I would pay them all off today.
Yeah.
The four are 1,200 and then the other are 1350.
Okay.
About 2,500 bucks would clear these.
Yeah, about $2,500.
500. And do you have any money in the bank right now? I don't. I try to listen to your guys' steps,
like save up a thousand. I tried that twice. I think this is such high interest, so I should pay
these off. But like I saved up a thousand twice and the emergency come up, so I would use that.
I think that, I think James, that the baby step is not the issue. I think it's your income. That's the
issue because obviously not having the money for car repairs, whatever is going on with the vehicle
is what caused you to get into this mess in the first place.
And that's also the thing that's holding you back from getting the $1,000 saved and being able to hold on to it.
So I'm hearing two issues.
I'm hearing a cash flow issue, so an income issue.
And I'm also hearing a lack of financial planning issue, which sounds like a budgeting issue.
So let's talk about those two things.
Do you have a budget?
And also I want to know how much are you bringing in every month as income?
I make about a little over $4,000 a month.
And is it just you?
I have a girlfriend also and two kids.
Okay, girlfriend and two kids.
And you guys are all living together.
It's one household?
Yeah, apartment.
Okay.
Is she contributing financially or no?
Yeah, she basically covers all the lights, gas, food, and she goes half with the rent with me.
So why is there a huge issue?
Because if I'm hearing somebody who is in a shared financial situation, you've got $4,000 a month, you're splitting
rent, she's covering all the basic utilities. Where's your money going? Tell us, tell us more.
Tell us about all your other debt. I just have one credit card. I pay every month. I have
storage, phone bill. And another big problem I was going to bring up next is I have a car loan
that I'm underwater in. And I'm also behind on. Do you still own that car? Yeah, I still have it.
I'm about 12,000 underwater. What's it worth? It's worth about.
$8,000.
Okay.
So you owe $10.5.20?
Yeah, I owe about 19.
And what's the payment on that?
Payments $5.30.
Yeah, that's messing with you.
Yeah.
I just realized just about a month ago, that's why I gave you guys a call.
So that I was behind a lot.
And I didn't know that it's like a big fee of interest when you're late also on top of the other
interest. So it was basically like a little over 150 in late fees every month occurring.
What about your rent? What are you guys paying in rent? Because still, I'm wondering where this
money is going. It's 1800. That's your half? Or that's the full amount? That's the full rent.
Okay. So yeah, we've definitely got to find out where your money's being spent. So second question,
do you have a budget? I'm guessing no. I tried the budget with the ad, but it's just so confusing with all
these other fees and other stuff. Okay. So what I want you to do, I want you to give it another shot
because I think you just need a little help tweaking it. When it comes to the fees and everything,
just plug in the minimum payments. That's all you need to do. There's a section, you list all of
them out. It'll ask you what the minimum payment is that you pay. Just fill that in. And then from
there, we can figure out how much margin you actually have, because I think that you have more than you
think you have. And then we can see a full number because the way we want you to tackle this is with
the debt snowball, which means you're only paying minimum payments on everything. And then smallest to
largest, we're taking the very smallest debt and all of our extra money goes on the smallest debt.
So therefore, while it's going to feel like the others are struggling because they are, and you're
going to feel it because these are payday loans, you're just going to see the balance go up
temporarily. But you're going to feel great when you knock these payday loans down from 10 to 9 and
from 9 to 8. And you're just going to have some stupid tax that you're going to feel in way of interest.
But the key here, James, is you need to throw more money at it than the balance is accruing,
which means you need to get aggressive.
That next paycheck needs to go mostly towards these debts so you can stop playing the shell game in Wackamol.
That's the only way out is you've got to be more aggressive than they are.
And then you know, never touch this hot stove again.
Delete these apps, never walk into one of those stores.
You drive by and say, that's a past version of James.
Never again.
And you're probably going to need to pick up a couple of side hustles.
You're going to have to work extra to get this done quickly.
Dave, we got a lot of calls on this show where life happens. One day someone's healthy, they're working, providing for their family, and then a curveball hits.
You know, we hear it all the time. A car accident, a cancer diagnosis, a heart attack, and suddenly everything changes.
Yeah, and that's why you've always said that having term life insurance from Xander is essential, because it protects your family if the worst happens.
Yeah, that's right. You need 10 to 12 times your income in coverage, no gamut. No gammy.
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But there's another piece that people often overlook, and that's long-term disability insurance.
Yeah, it's important to understand the difference between them.
Life insurance steps in when you die.
Disability insurance steps in while you're alive but can't work.
So it replaces a large part of your income so the bills still get paid while you get back on your feet.
Now, if your employer gives you free disability insurance, great.
Take it.
If it's discounted there at a better price, take it.
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all the difference. Go to zander.com or call 800-356-4282. Protect yourself, protect your income,
protect your family. All right, back to the phone lines. We go where we have Jeb, who's in Columbia,
South Carolina. Hey, Jeb, you're on the line. How can George and I help out?
My question is I'm 24 years old, and I am fixing to get married in November, and I
make 35,000 a year, and I was wondering, how can I, like,
make it a good budget and how can I be, and the only debt I have is to my house payment.
And what's a good way to stay on top of that where I ain't living paycheck to paycheck?
Yeah, absolutely.
I love that you're thinking ahead.
I love that you have no consumer debt.
What about the lady in waiting?
How do her finances look?
You don't have no debt either.
Okay, great.
And does she work?
She does.
She works.
What does she make?
Right now she works
She probably makes
In the month
Right now at her job
But she's going to be switching jobs
Right now
The job she's at right now
She probably makes $800 a month
Okay
And what does she do
And what will she be doing
She said she's switching jobs
She
When she switched jobs
She's going to be working at a coffee job
Okay
I mean she's making
Like less than minimum wage right now
If she's working full-time
So that part scares me
Oh no
No no
She ain't working
She's part-time working
right now. Okay, got it. And once she's working full-time, what will she be doing?
She'll be working at a coffee shop, and they told her with her experience, is that she should
be probably making around $16 to $20 an hour at the coffee shop. Okay, great. That's closer to $40,000 a
year. Wonderful. And what are you doing for work? I am a part-time little carrier for the post office.
I got two more years before I can go full-time. Two more years. Okay, and then they'll be making,
what, 70?
Right around 70, and then as the years keep going, making a little bit more and more and more
as the time goes on.
Okay, that's good.
I love that.
All right, so the key here is to stay out of debt and to continue to build wealth in the process.
So you're probably familiar that we teach a plan that's called the Baby Steps, and there's
seven of them.
And the idea is to get your, throughout the seven baby steps, to get your money working for you
to build wealth.
that you can live like no one else and be generous and all of these things, correct?
So you guys are partially there because you don't have any consumer debt.
The question is, do you have any money saved?
Right now, I'm trying to, so I wouldn't be in debt.
I'll tell you to start quick.
The house was given to me.
It was my grandma, my feet passed away.
He gave it to me.
And then my parents said, you know what, y'all starting out new, but y'all won't be in debt.
We'll go in there and we'll remodel the house for y'all.
pay us back for they not we only have to pay the whole loan back to them we only got to pay for 10
years a thousand a month a thousand dollars a month for 10 years and is there any way that you can
pay that off early are they open to you basically doing the calculation on that and saying we want
to get out of this early i mean i can if i you know what i mean like if we can afford it i would love
to pay it all quick as i can okay and that would be my goal do you guys love the house do you plan
on staying there for a while oh yeah and you're saying there's no
mortgage, it's paid off, but you basically have a $120,000 loan attached to it, to family.
Yes.
Well, yes.
To the family thing, yes.
Okay, at $1,000 a month.
So the goal would be, instead of waiting 10 years for that to get paid off through the minimum payment of $1,000,000, can we throw $2,000 at it, and get this thing done even faster?
Because Thanksgiving is going to be awkward, I'll tell you that much, because they're going to see you guys on the honeymoon, going on vacation.
and if you go, hey, money's tight this month, can't pay the thousand, or, man, it's been nine years, we need the money now.
Because they might have a health problem or want to retire and go, man, we're kind of regretting making this 10-year loan drag out.
And just to be clear, they are willing to hand over the deed once you've paid it.
It's not just we're talking here, like they're actually going to give you the deed.
That's what they said.
This is the deal.
They said since I'm part-time, they said as soon as I get full-time in two years, they would put the house.
in my name.
Okay, is any of this in writing?
Yes.
The question I have, though, okay, so when the house is in your name, what's the actual
mortgage payment?
Not what they're charging, and what's the actual payment?
I still would be paying the $1,000.
I understand.
Because you're saying it's paid off.
Until I get it paid off.
But they would have the house in my name.
It would be just like the house will be in my name, and I'll just keep paying them to
$1,000.
Right.
The clarity that I want is, is there an actual mortgage on the house or are they just charging you that money?
No, no, no, there's no mortgage date.
My daddy just retired and he took the money out of his retirement to redo the house.
Oh, boy.
That's kind of scary.
How much is he having a retirement?
Yep.
Over $300,000.
Okay.
That's a pretty big chunk to take out for these renovations.
No, no, no, I'll tell you about it.
He has over a million in retirement.
Oh, okay.
So he's fine.
Okay, so back to you and your fiancé.
I love this for you.
I think it's very generous that they're doing that.
And so, like I said, the goal is to continue to live that debt-free lifestyle.
I want to make sure you have savings today.
Do you and your fiancé, when you guys get married in November,
if you combine your savings together, how much money will that be?
Let's see, if I combine it, because I'll tell you this,
I got a savings account out of the mind.
I just opened up this past month, $250 is going into an eight pay period.
Perfect. Okay. Great. So the goal for you guys is to save up six months of expenses.
So in your budget, which we're going to gift you every dollar for your wedding present,
I want you to look at your month and say, what does it cost to make our month go?
Does it take $3,000? Okay, let's multiply that by six. We need $18,000 to make this thing go.
Lock that in, put it in a high-yield savings account somewhere that it's liquid,
but that it's not with your normal month-to-month checking account.
And that's going to be your three to six months.
That's Baby Step 3.
And then once that's done, you guys can start investing Baby Step 4.
You can put 15% of the amount that you make before taxes.
I want 15% of that to go to retirement.
And if you have a 401K through the post office, you want it to go into your employee-sponsored account.
So your 401K, if you don't have that, you can put it into a Roth IRA.
and do that. And I want your wife to do the same thing. And even now, as she's your fiance,
I want her to start doing that if she's to that point already. So now you're investing. Now
you're starting the process of building the wealth. And then from there on, you can continue the
baby steps. Baby step five, obviously you're putting away for kids college. And then baby step six,
which you guys are going to be at real fast. That's when you start hacking away at this $120,000,
like George said,
maybe doubling up
and doing $2,000 a month
instead of $1,000.
I tell you this,
I talk to when you're smart flow people
and I'm in the process
to open up a loss array
and a brokerage account.
Wow.
Good for you.
SmartVest or Pro.
That's fantastic that you connected with one.
And I wouldn't, here's the thing,
I wouldn't put money into that
until you have that emergency fund.
That's right.
And that might not be until the wedding.
Because what happens is you go invest
all this money,
you don't have any, and the HVAC goes out in this house, and you're on the hook.
And now you're trying to go $10,000 into debt to cover the new HVAC.
So that's why the emergency fund is so important.
It is your never go into debt again insurance plan.
So you guys are-
That's why I opened up the savings account was just to, so as out of mind,
I'm not going to touch that money unless I need it.
Good.
Yeah, breaking case of emergency, and that means it's unexpected and it's necessary.
That's right.
And you guys should aim for it.
If I were you somewhere between 15,000, is probably a really good number for you.
Again, I wouldn't combine finances until you guys are married in November, but you should be having these conversations and you should be talking about it.
You should have full transparency into what she's doing financially and vice versa until you do get married.
And then everything is combined together.
One checking account, one high yield savings account, you can add her as the beneficiary on your 401 case.
She can do the same on hers.
and that way everything is all together.
And listen, I'm pulling for you guys.
This is exciting.
I think that you're in a really, really good position.
You've got an uptick on your careers.
You're in a good place with the home.
Congratulations.
If you can learn to live off of your 35 grand,
when you make 70 and you keep living like this,
you're going to be stacking some cash
and building some serious wealth.
Multi-millionaires is what you'll be.
I just crunch the numbers for you.
Even at 67,000 household income,
If you invest 15% of that from 24 to 64, you're looking at over $5 million.
Wow.
So it's simple.
And that's if you guys never get a raise, you don't both grow in your careers, which is highly unlikely.
That's right.
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Erica is in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
Erica.
So how can we help today?
Hi, thanks for taking my call.
So I am a single female living in Philadelphia.
I'm a pharmacist, and I graduated with a ton of student loan debt.
So at this point, I am wondering how I can get this amount down
or if I should invest instead to offset the compound interest on it.
So I guess my question is, do I pay down the student loan debt or do I put more an investment?
Okay. How much debt are we talking about? Not that it changes my answer. I just want to know.
Yeah. Student loan debt is right around $192,000.
$192. And what's your income now that you're a pharmacist?
Currently, post taxes, I make $5782 per month.
Okay. Do you happen to know what the interest rate is?
is on those student loans, ballpark, if it's not the same for all of them?
Yeah, it's 3.1%.
Okay.
Okay.
So to your question, offsetting the compound interest, the best way to offset the interest
is to pay more than the minimum payment, to throw as much as you can at it to knock
down that principle, because 3% of 100,000 is a whole lot less than 192,000.
So the faster you knock these debts out, the less interest you're going to pay.
And that's a guaranteed rate of return.
that 3.2% versus investing it with market volatility, you could lose money one month,
make a little one month. But you're much better off knocking out all these debts because your
life is on hold until you repay these lenders. It's going to be really hard to do all the things
you want to do in life, get married, get a house, have kids, whatever it is, go on vacations,
when you have all these payments stacked up every month. What are the minimum payments currently
do for that $192,000?
currently it's sitting at $1,300 per month.
Okay.
Yeah, I mean, that's a high payment.
I tend to agree with George on this for similar reasons, but also I would just add on, you know, I think that there's, you're not the only one who feels that way, who thinks, hey, I could just pay the minimums and anything extra.
I can invest that money and I'll feel great because I'll have $300,000 sitting in investments or I'll have half a million dollars.
but you also have to consider that if you did that for a five or 10 year span, that student loan is still accruing.
And even if you did invest and even if you did have $300,000 sitting there, that's your money,
now the student loan that started at $191,000 is now creeping up to, you know, $270,000, $275,000.
And you have to ask yourself, oh, my gosh, that's not going to feel like the freedom that I thought it would feel like.
and I painted this picture before, but it helped me in my husband when we had 90,000 left,
and the payment wasn't very high.
And we thought, you know what, we don't need to pay this off.
We can just, we can live with this.
But it feels like it's like what I liken it to is being inside of a beautiful home.
The home is beautiful.
It's everything you wanted.
As long as you're in there, everything is great.
But the minute you open the door, you realize you are right at the edge of a cliff
and it's like a California cliff.
If the house falls off,
you are just tumbling into the abyss.
And that's the way it feels on the inside.
Is I still have this debt attached to me.
And you know what I'm talking about.
I mean, you feel it every time
when you lay in the bed at night.
So that's kind of, you know,
a more emotional take on it.
And I think it's worth it
because, you know,
our body does keep the score
in these situations.
Yeah, absolutely.
I think maybe the only issue
that I find
because I do have my own budget is what's left over after all of my expenses.
And what makes it even tougher is being single and not living with somebody,
being the only person contributing to rent in big city.
And I did at one point make very large payments and it helped a lot.
And then, you know, switching to different jobs, moving to a different city,
being single again because I used to be married.
It just makes it a lot harder.
Yeah.
So this is the tough part.
It's trying to look for that extra income to be able to put there because all I'm doing right now is surviving.
Well, what is the trajectory for you look like as a pharmacist?
Because if you're bringing home, you know, what is it, $69,000 a year, that's probably around $100,000 gross in a high cost of living area.
So how do we get you to be making $150 as a pharmacist?
Because that would really speed this up.
Absolutely. So right now, that's kind of what I'm looking towards. The market within pharmacy is a little tough. But I do have some future plans on finding a job that probably the market in Philadelphia is right around, I would probably say, about 140.
that really, so that would be as a pharmacist, like a good salary that you can make.
Now, I'm looking for other options, too, that can help me make more because right now
what I'm making is not, just is not enough.
Yeah, I agree.
So I guess maybe that's the answer.
Well, at this rate, you're just feeling hopeless because making these minimum payments,
it's going to take you a lifetime to pay the student loans off.
And until you can throw, you know, three grand a month at the debts, four grand a month,
it's not going to feel like there's any hope and sight or light at the end of this tunnel.
But I'm doing the math here going, all right, if you can throw 3,200 of these debts every month,
you're done in five years.
And that's if you don't get a raise.
Now, that's tough, obviously.
You're in a high-cost living city.
What is your rent every month?
Currently, it's right around $15 or $1,600 a month.
Okay.
Could you get a two-bedroom and rent with a friend, get a roommate?
So next year, I'm planning on renting,
from my friend who owns a home in Philly, and it will be with a roommate.
That's great.
So I'm, this, that 15, 1,600 is one bedroom, one bath in Philly.
Okay. So what would your rent go down to?
I'm not sure. She would probably work with me. I would say she would probably help me get to like
maybe 1,400. Oh, that's not much savings.
It's not much different. I said like, a thousand bucks or something. We're like, all right,
we saved 500 bucks a month. This is worth it.
Well, when you pass it along through utilities and maybe food, I don't know how much you would share.
There might be something there if you guys, you know.
But if you could get a two bedroom for two grand a month, well, now you're splitting at a thousand bucks.
I'm trying to go through.
So there's two ways to get more margin to get rid of this debt faster, and that's to make more or spend less.
And so those are the two areas, the two levers I want you to start looking at is do a detailed budget using every dollar.
and I'll gift that to you to help you get through this.
And go look at all of your expenses.
Because right now, you feel like you need to live like a pharmacist.
You want people to know.
Look at me.
I'm doing pretty good.
And the problem is that's going to cause lifestyle creep.
You're going to eat out more, go out more, have nicer things, dress nicer.
And right now we need to live like a broke college student because we've got a mess to clean up.
Absolutely.
The good news is...
Oh, I don't have any problem with eating ramen.
So we're good.
The good news is, you know, your rent right now is really right at the 20th.
5% mark, you know, between that and your minimum payments, you're at $2,800 a month.
Where's the rest of that money going?
What's your next biggest expense that you go, you know, here's the problem, guys, it's my car payment.
Is there anything else that we could try to help you find that margin?
Do you have a car payment, speak of?
I do have a car payment.
It's not much, and it's, I owe 1,898 left on it.
Okay.
That's nothing.
85 months.
Okay, well, that's some margin freed up.
Is there anything else?
Because I still feel like there's a big chunk of money that's not accounted for by all the major players.
You didn't mention kids or daycare or anything like that.
Let me see.
I have a budget.
There is, I mean, not really.
It just goes to essentially rent, car.
I have a lot of, I put a lot of.
money away in retirement.
Okay, there's where it is.
I knew it was somewhere.
So again, I love this conversation because you're wanting to do the right things.
You're just doing them in the wrong order.
So I love a person who wants to build wealth.
I love a person.
You're very responsible because that's a responsible choice.
But George and I would caution you that there's a better order to do this in because if
you're investing but you're still in debt, you know, obviously it's taking away your piece.
we talked about that. And obviously, you probably don't have much liquid savings. And so therefore,
your retirement is at risk. The next time you're in a jam, you might liquidate that, which is
terrible. So George and I would say you need to pause investments. It's only temporary. It's not a
scary thing, but you need the full force of your income to do what George said, which is be putting
hopefully around $3,000 a month on these student loans to get them paid off. Please, please, please,
cancel and pause those retirement contributions.
Hey guys, George Camel here.
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All right, George, let's hear from Tabitha, who's right here in our backyard, Nashville, Tennessee.
Hi, Tabitha, what's up?
Hey, so I recently paid off my student loans and finally on the straight and arrow, right?
Awesome.
I called the credit union that opened up a high-old student, well, it's a job.
checking, but it has a higher yield than the high yield savings. So anyhow, and I asked them, like,
you know, because I want to plan to be able to put money down. And I was thinking about the
manual underwriting because other than that, I have one credit card, but I don't use it. So I'm
fixing to have it just cut off basically. And they acted like that was crazy. So I guess I got the
weird thing for the first time. But I'm wondering, like, am I asking, like, is there questions
I'm supposed to ask, is there a different way to go about it?
Because they were like, no, you need credit.
Like, you don't need to turn that off.
Like, even if you don't use it, your credit score will still be there and we'll be able
to use it and it should.
If it's paid off and it should go up and I'm like, oh, I'm not sure about that.
Just to, for the person listening, manual underwriting is the way that you get approved
for a mortgage if you don't have a credit score.
Not if you have a low score.
People think, well, I can get around my low score.
But no, if you have a score at all, you can't do manual underwriting.
That's right.
So that's the key tabithas.
Once you're completely debt-free, all the accounts are closed.
It may take six to 12 months for your credit score to become indeterminable.
And at that point, then you can do manual underwriting.
So I don't know when you're going to be ready to actually go home shopping.
Are we talking three years from now?
Probably like a little over a year based on the amount that I'm going to have to save to get to the 25% bank.
Okay, cool.
So do you have an emergency fund yet?
I know you said your student loans, your loans are paid.
off. No, I'm finishing that up, hopefully, within the next six months, and then after that I'll
start on the down payment savings fund. Okay, cool. So here's the deal. A lot of people don't know
what manual underwriting is because they were so ingrained in the broken financial system we find
ourselves in. But the truth is, credit scores have not been around that long. We're talking like
since the 90s. And before that, what lenders did was look at things like your income. So they'd verify your
income. Look at your rental payment history. They'd look at, you know, 12-month history of your bank
statements. They would look at trade lines like utility bills or cell phone bills to determine whether
or not they will grant this loan to you. So that's exactly what manual underwriting does.
And you just looked in the wrong place. So I would reach out to Church Home Mortgage. You can go to
churchhome mortgage.com and talk to them about it. They're the number one in the nation because
we send all the Ramsey fans to them. So they won't look at you like you're crazy. They'll go,
oh, absolutely. We can help with that. And they'll answer.
all of your questions and steer you in the right direction when it comes to what you need to do
to get prepared for that. Because there are some steps. There's a few hoops to jump through,
but I've done it. It's not as difficult as people make it out to be. No, it's not bad. So for a few
more specifics, if you're thinking about that, you need to be able to show 12 months of documented
rental history. So if you're listening out there and you're living with mom and dad and not paying
rent, thinking you're going to buy a house and do manual underwriting, you need to pay rent.
You need to have some sort of documented rental payment history. You need to have 12 months of other
trade lines. These are things like George mentioned, cell phones, utilities. You could even use
insurance payments for that. Also, actual money. Okay, so they're going to want to see that you have
income for the last 12 months. If you're self-employed, they might look back two years. That's important.
And then obviously, you want a nice down payment. The bigger, the better is going to set you up to
win. And that's really all there is to it. It's really not that big of a deal. The only other part
of this is just making sure you're in the right position. And Tabitha, it sounds like you're on the
track, finishing up that debt, saving up the three to six months, and then getting on to that down payment.
Very, very good call.
That's awesome.
Thank you for the call.
All right, let's keep it rolling.
George, we got Madison in Charlotte, North Carolina.
Hey, Madison.
Hi, thank you for taking my call.
Yes, ma'am.
What's going on?
So my husband and I just got married in January, and we started out at around close to $100,000 in debt.
We're now at around $38,000.
but we are expecting a baby in November.
So my question, I know you guys say usually to pause if you're expecting,
but how much do you think is a good amount to have to be prepared?
I love that question.
So, yeah, you're exactly right.
We call that stork mode, which is kind of funny,
but it's just the idea of the most important thing in your world right now
is being prepared for this baby, not paying off debt.
And so, yeah, pausing is good.
I'm thinking about two things.
Number one, I'm going to save as much.
as I possibly can. Whatever money I can, because the truth is, if it weren't stork mode,
you'd still be doing that. The money would just be going towards debt. So yeah, let's keep up that
same intensity because the fact of the matter is when the baby comes and you guys get home and
everybody's healthy, you're going to take that money and you're going to throw it towards
the debt. So the more the merrier. But I would have a couple of thoughts in mind to go along with
that. Number one, George, I'm always looking at the out-of-pocket max on my insurance.
That's the part you're on the hook for. Yep. I want to know that if things,
go south and, you know, we end up having more certain, yes. What is it? Is it 10,000? Is it 1250? Like,
whatever it is, I want that money, that amount saved that just gives you just that warm,
fuzzy feeling. Some peace of mind that you're not going to be going into a bunch of medical debt
if you were to have a longer hospital stay. And so once you and baby are home safe,
you might have 30 grand ready to throw at the debt while you've been making these minimum payments.
So how much could you save by the time baby's here?
That's good question. I feel like we kind of got like a good head start because we were able to get rid of a car and then we had wedding money. But I would say, we could probably say close to 10, maybe $15,000 before the baby gives here.
Okay. So if you made minimum payments on the debts and then through the rest of its savings, $15K by November is what you're thinking.
Sure. The only other thing is that I know we shouldn't have done this, but we borrowed some money from a family member. So we do want to pay that for sure.
before the baby gets here, but I think we could get through that pretty quickly.
How much is it?
So $5,500.
That's a significant chunk of $10,000 to $15,000.
Yeah, I mean, I wasn't, we should be able to have that this month or next month.
Oh, so that's aside from this?
I think that we could still get to at least $10,000 before the baby gets here.
Okay. What's your household income?
105.
All right. And are you planning on going back to work?
after or are you going to stay home?
I do plan to go back, yeah.
Okay, cool.
And what's left in 38K?
What kind of debts are those?
I have 13,000 on my car, 9,000 in student loans, the $5,500 to my dad, and the rest is credit
cards.
Okay.
Now, the bigger question is, are you guys done with debt?
Are you changing the behavior that got you here?
Like, have you cut up the credit cards?
Yeah, we're absolutely good.
Good. Love to hear that.
Well, you're on your way.
I'd be focused on just making sure you and baby are healthy, and the debt will get paid.
And I hope it's done.
I mean, it'd be pretty cool if you guys went real crazy and got it done early next year before that baby's first birthday.
For sure.
That's the plan as soon as possible.
We've been doing pet sitting and staying at different houses, which we don't want to do that anymore because it's hard to be newlyweds and away from each other.
Sure.
trying to do whatever we can to get through it.
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, that's the mentality that you have to have when you're attacking debt, George.
You're going to feel a level of discomfort.
And if you're trying to do the things that we teach and trying to keep it, you know, life is the same.
Nothing really changes.
I don't really feel it.
You're not going, you're not doing it right.
Yeah.
You need to go hard enough that you never want to go back into debt.
That's right.
Because you sacrifice so deep.
Yes.
And for me, it was like lean cuisines.
That was my debt-free journey food, and I would wait for them.
I'd go to Kroger.
I'd wait for them to be on sale, five for $10 at the time.
$2.
I was like, oh, if I can eat for $2 a meal, I mean, I look, if you open my fridge, there was
nothing in it.
You open my freezer?
Just a stack of lean cuisine's 20 high.
All I think about is the microplastics in today's world.
They're going to study my body for science one day.
Your brain is like really made of plastic.
What happened to him?
And so now I can't even pass by the lean cuisines in the grocery store.
Oh, it's like, it just brings me back.
I feel a little vile.
No, thank you.
Not doing that again.
But that's caused me to not going to debt.
I know, that's right.
Whatever you have to do.
Because I'm not going back to that lean cuisine lifestyle.
Who cares?
Who cares if you were in the best shape ever?
I'll keep my lean physique in other ways.
What a great name, though.
Lean cuisine.
You got to admit.
Yeah.
Did you have a debt-free food?
Now, you're a foodie and you eat super clean.
You wouldn't darken the door of a lean cuisine.
I wouldn't darken the door of a lean cuisine.
I think for me the biggest thing is I don't, don't ask me about a coupon.
Don't ask me to do something to get money off, right?
Like, I did enough couponing that I don't want anymore.
That's your PTSD.
Yeah, even you'll say, you'll say, oh, you should do that app.
You can save money.
I'm like, no, I don't want to save money.
She doesn't want to hear about my promo code to get 30% off pizza.
George Camel here.
Let me give you three signs.
It's time to stop hoping your debt problem goes away and actually take action to fix it.
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You've got someone in your corner who knows how to respond when your debt problems escalate into legal problems.
So don't wait for it to get worse.
Go to guardianlit.com slash Ramsey right away.
That's guardian l-it.com slash Ramsey.
Attorney advertising. Results may vary and no specific outcomes guaranteed.
Welcome back to the Ramsey show here in the Fair of Wins Credit Union Studio.
I'm Jade. This is George next to me taking your calls.
And we've got Jacob who's on the line in Richmond, Virginia. Jacob, what's going on in your world?
Hey, you guys. Thanks for taking my call. I was calling about, I've been considering going to college to kind of get a job that I'm more wired for. I've taken the kind of assessment test. And the hard decision about it is just that I'm in a career now. It pays pretty solid considering I don't have a degree, but it's just not the most fulfilling.
What kind of work is it that you're doing now and what are you earning?
Yeah, it's a lot of just kind of desk work at a computer desk for like a labor company.
I make about 55.
Okay.
And what is it that you want to do and what would be a fair salary that you think you'd make doing that?
Yeah.
I'm kind of more in line to like when I kind of counsel people or speak with them and like kind of leave an impact from my research, where I can expect if I get like a degree.
with it would be about 60 to 65 is the average from where I'm at.
Okay.
I'm confused.
Are you talking about being like a therapist?
So with the assessment test I did, some of the options,
why I saw that I liked was like a school counselor.
Okay.
And have you looked into what it actually takes to become a school counselor?
Yeah.
So on that assessment, it shows that a master degree would be needed along with some licensing,
which the part that's hard for me is like I don't mind.
mind doing that, but I feel like it's kind of maybe unwise to maybe do this change while I'm in
the process of baby step number two. Oh, okay. So baby step two, for those listening, that's the
step where you're paying off your consumer debt. How much consumer debt do you have? At this
current moment, I have about 11,000. I started at 20, like last year. Okay, so you've been making
headway on that. And is it just you, Jacob, or do you have a family wife? I actually just got
married in March, I came down and visited you all on my honeymoon.
Wow.
We probably told you to go have fun and get out of here.
George made a joke about it, but yeah.
That it's sad that this, you're like, what are you doing for your honeymoon?
They're like, we're here.
I'm like, okay, what else?
No, that's great.
Exactly, yeah.
So is your now wife working outside the home?
Yeah, she's a nurse, well, she's a nurse tech at a hospital.
Okay. And what does she make?
I think right now she's like about 30 a year. She's like hourly like 18 to 19.
Okay.
Okay. And that should be closer to like 40 grand gross per year, which puts you guys close to a six-figure salary. Does she have any debt?
No. Now all of her schools been paid for so far, but we might have to pay for it in the future.
Have you guys combined finances?
Yes, completely.
Okay, because I'm wondering, how can we, here's my goal for you.
How do we do this thing?
Because I want you to pursue this dream of being a school counselor, but we want to do it smart
and we want to do it debt free.
And so what I would recommend is knocking out this debt really fast and the why behind it
is I got this dream on the other side that I want to get to.
And that's going to put some fire under this to go, you know what, we make a hundred grand.
We're bringing home, you know, seven grand a month, whatever it is.
can we throw three grand a month of this debt be done in three months or four grand a month
and go hard at this thing?
Because now, three months from now, now we can work on the emergency fund.
Do you guys have savings right now?
We have the $1,000 savings out there that we're just in intense with paying off debt.
Okay, good.
So I would set an aggressive goal to pay off the debt, an aggressive goal to get through your baby step three,
your full emergency fund of three to six months of expenses.
And at that point, now you can begin investing and cash flowing.
this school dream. And so that's where you need to get clear on what is the most affordable
school I can go to to get the degree required. Yeah. Not the fanciest school, just what is the most
affordable school to check the box and say, yep, I have this degree. Because you need to go undergrad
into grad. Potentially for that, I'm not necessarily saying that's the factory it has to be. I just
know for a fact I'd probably be more fulfilled. But yeah, it's just been difficult because I'm not sure
if it's unwise or kind of selfish to do a step like that.
Well, you do have to consider the return on investment.
You have to consider a couple of things.
Number one, we're not going into debt for it.
So just for the master's side of it, I mean, a lot of people would borrow anywhere
between 60 to 120,000 to be able to do what it is that you want to do.
But then you're coming away with a degree making 55 to 75 to 75, right?
So you have to think through that.
The time frame, I think, gives you some time that you could cash flow.
I mean, people do these programs in two to three years.
So I think that that gives you some time that if you started with a chunk of money, right, as to start out with, it's like, okay, I work a semester.
And during that semester, I'm saving up for the next semester.
I think you could cash flow it in that way.
And that's the only way that I would suggest it.
Yeah, I would just do some really deep dives into how, I hate the word cheap, but how inexpensive you can get this degree.
Is it an online option?
Are there things that you can do to mitigate that cost at all?
Yeah, that makes sense.
And you'll have to think through, can you do this, go to school full time while your wife carries the load of income for the family?
So that's another piece of the puzzle to figure out.
Well, you need to work part-time and this just takes longer.
And you're doing school at night, for example.
So that would be a conversation I would start to have with your wife about what this actually looks like in reality versus I just have this dream and I hate this job.
so I'm just going to leave.
At all costs, I'm going to go do it.
You want to be smart about it and move slowly with peace
so that you don't have a pile of debt on the other side.
And does your wife, does she plan on moving up to being a registered nurse,
or is she going to keep teching?
Like, what's she going to do?
Yeah, I think she wants to continue moving up in that kind of career tree.
She has about two more years before she can be considered like an official nurse.
Okay.
And we can probably expect about another 10K for her.
schooling and now that we're married, she probably won't give as much financial aid.
Okay.
Right.
Okay.
So I wonder if her career trajectory has a higher ceiling right now, I might have her pursue
school first.
Like, hey, you go first.
Yeah.
You go make, you know, 80 grand a year as a nurse so that we have the freedom, flexibility for
me to go pursue this over here.
So there is kind of a give and take here.
We can't all just, you know, go pursue our dreams all at the same time and nobody's working.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Definitely.
So it might take longer than you.
want it to, but I believe this is, it's not a selfish thing to go do work that you're wired
to do that does give you fulfillment. Okay. I appreciate that. Yeah. Thanks for the call.
You know, a lot of times, George, we take these calls and we're talking about dollars and cents
and income and all these things. But the truth is, this is the job that you're going to be going
into day in, day out, spending the majority of your life there, eight, ten hours a day. You're
commuting there. You're giving up time from your your children.
and your family there, it matters.
Like, you have to feel good about the work that you're doing.
You have to feel like you're making a difference.
It has to feel worth it to you.
So conversations like this, I love them because I'm all about getting people to that.
Like, everybody wants to feel good about the work that they're doing
and the time that they're spending doing it.
Well, Anna, I always recommend go meet with some school counselors.
Get a feel for what they actually do day to day.
True that.
Do they enjoy it?
What are the pitfalls?
What are the things that they love about the job?
Uh-huh.
What are things to look out for?
for as you pursue this career field or what school you work at. All of that matters.
And you don't want to show up and go, wow, this is not what I thought it would be.
I sunk all this money. Pivot. Now you're Ross from friends. Pivot. Pivot.
Okay, guys, let me ask you something. What would it take for you to switch your bank?
Because if you're still earning next to nothing on your savings, you need to check out
Fairwin's credit union. And I know what you're thinking. It might sound like a hassle.
Moving your direct deposit, updating bills, getting a new debit card, feels like a lot. But here,
here's what most people don't realize. Staying where you are could be costing you hundreds of dollars every
year. Y'all, the average savings account pays less than half a percent. So let's say, for example,
you've got $20,000 saved. You might earn around $70 a year. But with a fair-wind high-yield savings
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switch today. That's fairwinds.org slash Ramsey, insured by the NCUA. All right, back to the phone
lines. Simon is in San Diego, California. What's up, Simon? Hey, how's it going?
Good. How can we help?
First of all, really awesome to be talking to Jaden George, a long-time listener of the show.
Second of all, I am debating on getting a HELOC to pay for one, clear up some Amex debt that my wife and I have to buy a new vehicle.
Wait, is this a prank call, dude?
No.
You said long-time listener, and then you mentioned three things that we are viewing.
vehemently against.
Or did you just wait until Dave wasn't here?
I totally get that.
I was going to feel like I kind of sound a little bit silly, long-time listener.
I know you guys don't like going into debt.
So the goal of all this is to buy a new car?
Well, Amex is a big one as well.
But, yeah, we need a new vehicle.
Our last one, the one that we currently have is on the fritz.
And, yeah, that's a primary concern right now with me and my life is getting a new car.
Okay, so let's kind of pan back here because if you're doing all of this rigmarole to get a new car, this is a symptom of a much greater issue, which is you guys are out of control, right?
There's something going on with debt.
There's something going on with income that's causing you to spend on the credit card, not be able to pay the balance.
And then instead of looking to something like savings or liquid cash, you're now looking to a line of credit that's attached to your home, which is what a he's.
lock is and you're now thinking about draining the equity in one of your greatest assets to now fund.
What I think you said is, I don't know if it's a brand new car, but a new car. So I'm a little
nervous about that. Very nervous about that. Tell us when you say your current car is on the fritz,
what does that mean? Does that mean, hey, we just have to make some repairs and we just don't want
to pay to $700 or is it, you know, the engine exploded and it needs a new drive shaft. Like, what's
going on? I'll never use that terminology again, by the way. That's the best I've got. That was
impressive. It's going to be one of those scenarios where we either keep it for maybe a year,
but it is a 2018, and it's gotten so many problems to where the next time we get any sort of,
we have to pay more money for this car. We're just going to sell it at that point.
Okay, so you said you could make this work for another year. So the question now is, can we clean up
the financial mess in a year and save up for this car in cash and get a new to you car?
Well, yeah, I have cash.
That's the thing.
How much cash do you have, Simon?
About 15 grand right now in a savings.
Good.
But we have a lot of money actually in an inherited IRA.
But we want to use that money to, for a use that money technically is our income.
So we use the stipends of that to add to our current income.
What's your current income without the IRA?
Without the IRA.
The IRA right now is giving us an additional 30K year.
So what do you guys make out?
That would be about 135.
Okay, 135K is your household income.
And what's left on the MX?
What's the balance?
About 14K.
So why don't you use your savings and pay off the MX today?
Well, because we then we don't have any savings.
Well, we technically do, but then we don't have any, like, liquid cash.
Like, I don't like taking money out of that IRA.
I want to use that, use those monthly stipends for, you know, as long as I possibly can't.
But you like putting your house at risk with a helock to pay off the MX to buy a brand new car that's going to go down in value?
I get that it's going to go down in value, but I don't think the home is technically at risk because if I make a plan to pay this heat lock off quickly and don't want to stay there on.
If I had a nickel for every time someone had a plan on this show, I wouldn't be in the job.
So here's the deal, dude.
You know what to do.
Use your cash savings to pay off the debt, cut up the freaking MX, never use it again,
never take out a he lock, and then you save up for a car you can afford in cash.
That's it.
And make the repairs needed until you have the cash to buy the car you want and make sure that car and everything, other cars,
don't add up to more than half your annual income.
So for you guys, that's, you know, 65K in cars.
Yeah.
That's plenty of car.
Plenty of car. And I think the rule of thumb, there's a lesson to be learned here, and I think it's worth highlighting. So you cannot solve a problem while simultaneously creating the problem. And in simplest terms, that is, if debt is your problem, you cannot solve the problem of debt while going into more debt. You cannot use debt to solve for debt. The only way you solve for debt is to pay it off. And the problem with it is a lot of times people,
use language like, I'm going to use a HELOC to pay off my credit card debt. Like, you're not paying
it off. You're simply moving it. It is not a solution. It's just, I'm moving it from here to over
here. And the saddest thing about it, George, is they're thinking that that's a better position for
the debt. They're like, well, I'd rather, I need to pay off the mafia. So I'll go borrow from the
cartel. I'd rather owe the cartel money than the mafia. You're like, dude, this is a terrible life you've
created for yourself. Yeah. And it's not even, I don't even. I don't even. I don't even. I don't even
want to create any shame around it because I think what's speaking here is desperation. It's,
I see a situation. It's not good. And I'm looking for a quick fix. Can I fix it quickly? Because
you know you're not safe. Like you know it's not a good thing. So the quickest possible thing I can
do, I can go over here and get a helock. They're going to loan me up to 80 to 90 percent of my home
equity. I can do that. And it's like, hold up, pump the brakes. Let's just think for a second.
This guy's got the money sitting there. And in many cases, that is. You've got the money liquid,
but there's that false security of, I have this cash, I need this cash. But we're telling you,
once you pay off the debt and you're free, now suddenly you've got more income. You can save
up that cash again. If you saved it up once, you can save it up again. Well, if you're scared
apart with the cash, you already did by going $15 grand to debt. That's right. Just you did it
without realizing it was someone else's money that you got to pay back later. And later always comes,
unfortunately. It does. And that's the part where, and this is, I'm not saying this to be
snarky, although George, you could say it to be snarky. I appreciate that.
Math, if you're deciding to do math, then you have to decide to do math on both sides.
If you're deciding to say, I care about my 15,000, it took me X amount of months to save it up,
it's precious to me, then you have to do the math on the other side that goes, well,
you don't really have that because you owe 14 on a credit card.
On the balance sheet, it's not mathen.
Yeah, and so that's just a little something to remember.
It's important, guys.
Okay, Brian, in Sacramento, California.
I'm sorry, Brian.
How can we help you today? Is it another car question?
Hi, Jay. Hi, George. Yes, it is. I want to buy sort of my midlife crisis car.
How much is the Mazda Miata going to cost you?
Close. It's 12 grand.
Okay. What car is it?
I would rather not say because it's very rare, but it's as old as I am and it's a convertible.
That's fun. All right. And it's only 12K. Do you have the cash to do it?
I do. Are you in debt? What bothers me? No, I have no debt other than my mortgage. But I am 54. I have only about 100 grand in retirement savings at this point. And, you know, my mortgage, I'd like to pay off by the time I'm in my mid-60s. I'm currently on track to pay it off by 66.
Okay. So you're saying you feel bad blowing 12 grand on a toy when you're behind on retirement.
I feel, yeah, yeah, I feel self-indulgent and frivolous.
It's, you know, it would be fun to have.
But, yeah, I just, I feel like I need to pay off my mortgage as fast as possible,
and I need to build up my retirement as quick.
I'm currently putting 15% every year based on a $185,000.
dollar salary into my 401k.
Would you be trading your existing car for this car, or would this just be another car to add
to the garage?
This would be another car.
Okay.
Are you married?
Single.
Okay.
Man, well, here's the thing.
I don't think this is going to make or break your chances of retiring, but I do think if
you buy this car, I would really hit the accelerator to get your retirement.
order and get this house paid off faster, get your income up even further. You're doing really well
right now. You just are in, you know, later on in the game. So I'm not mad about it for you going to get
this 12K car. You got to be ready for the insurance, the maintenance, the repairs as well. There's going to be
ongoing costs. But again, it's not a maker break. I think it's not a maker break. By the time you retire,
your house is going to be paid off. And that money is going to a lump sum that's earning the right
rate of return is going to double every seven years. So I think that you, that you will. You're
can be okay. Just be okay working four months longer than you would have. There you go. As a mom,
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Mamabearlegalforms.com code Ramsey. The truth is we wish we could get to every single call in
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Jennifer is in Charleston, South Carolina. Jennifer, you,
are on the line.
Hi, how are y'all doing today?
Doing great. What's up in your world?
All right. So me and my husband got married just over a year ago. And we were living in
apartment, paying rent. We have no debt at all other than just rent. Okay. So we got into
some family issues. My husband's parents were supposed to be taking care of my husband's
grandparents. If one of them passed away, they were pretty much going to be moving in with them.
They got into an argument. They're no longer taking care of his grandpa. So we have now been
blessed with the financial burden, I guess, of his grandfather and trying to help him financially
because he's unable to on just one income. So we're having a hard time trying to navigate
our life moving forward with taking on this big expense. Since we're
both 27, we haven't started our family or anything like that, just kind of worried about long term.
So let me get this straight. Your in-laws got mad and decided we're not helping him anymore,
and they then pushed it over to you guys, the 27-year-olds?
Pretty much. So they don't think that he really looked at all of his options. He's living on his
own right now. He was going to be moving in with them. Now that they don't want him to move in,
Why don't they want him to?
It was some argument and some old bitterness from something that happened many years ago
that now they don't want him to move in now that he's needing to.
Got it.
And so now you guys are up to bat.
And you can also say no.
What happens if you say no?
What do you think the repercussion is?
Probably just a hardened relationship, I guess, with grandpa.
With grandpa, okay.
Right. He is alone now and he's sad.
He just lost his wife back in December.
Oh, no.
So he just wants to be around family.
Yeah.
And of course he could probably find a home to stay in or he probably would have to get a job again and work to make up.
But he's just living in it.
He's 73.
He's in great health condition. He just is loving the retired life. He doesn't want to have to go back to work.
Well, he doesn't get an option if he doesn't have money. I mean, true.
So, I mean, that's a hard conversation to have with a grown adult and maybe the whole family and go, listen, we nobody wants to take on the financial burden. We love Grandpa. We need to figure out a plan for him. Let's say he lives another 25 years. Are you guys just going to live there and take care of his bills for 25 years and stunt your own?
growth? I don't want to. No, you know, that's an insane thing to be asked of you and you have
every right to say, no, I'm not doing that. Right. And it doesn't mean you don't love
Grandpa. It just means you're not going to be a part of this dysfunction and get this slapped
on to you to go, well, this is your burden to carry forever. That's what family does. Now,
if you want to chip in to help Grandpa, that's a discussion you can have and what limited contributions
you're going to make per month for whatever amount of time. But for you to just fund his life forever because
enjoys being retired is insane.
Where is he living now?
Does he have a home that he owns?
He does.
He still has a mortgage on it.
He could probably sell it, but would only make probably a little over $100 grand back in proceeds.
Okay.
So we have just moved in with him.
We told him we can, of course, cover the home things.
Oh, you moved in with him?
Yeah, we already have.
Oh, no.
Jennifer, you just made this.
You made this the plot twist.
One of you has to get evicted.
This is awkward.
Our lease was ending, and so we didn't want to have to sign a six month or another year if he was really struggling.
And he's not struggling yet.
Yeah, I thought you said he was healthy enough to go back to be working and stuff.
Right.
Without going back to work, he's in like a $2,000 deficit is what he says.
Per month.
Which really, yes.
What are his expenses outside of the mortgage?
Fervilous things.
He spends too much money on groceries and gas.
So it's not really a deficit.
It's a budgeting.
He's living above his means for sure.
So now we're allocating a budget.
We're not even just taking care of the elderly.
We're just funding his lifestyle and whatever he wants to buy.
It's going to be on you to fund the deficit.
Yeah, even more reason to not sign up for this.
Yeah, I think those are two different things and it's worth noting the difference.
If you're telling me that this guy just needs to reallocate funds and then he's got enough to live on his own,
that is completely different than saying,
my grandfather, who is 90 years old, who is suffering from, you know, whatever, whatever health
things, he cannot work.
He has, you know, $1,500 of Social Security and that's it and no return.
Right?
Those are different situations.
For sure.
This is not that.
How much does he actually bring in a month?
A little over 2000.
And what's his mortgage payment?
His mortgage is like $792, I think.
Okay.
Okay. He escrows his taxes. He pays out of pocket for insurance.
Okay. What about cars? Does he have a car payment?
No, both of his cars are paid off, just the insurance. He has two vehicles. He doesn't want to get rid of one because it's his dream Mustang that he enjoys driving.
This is getting worse for him.
I know. Gas is expensive. I think he needs to feel the reality of a situation, which means nobody's going to be funding his misbehavior anymore.
If he can't make the payments, if he goes deeply into credit card debt, that's on him.
You don't need to try to fund his life so that he doesn't go into debt.
If he goes into debt, he's a grown man who can make those decisions.
And that's, you know, Capital One's problem if they give a 73-year-old a $10,000 credit card limit.
And Jennifer, I want to turn this conversation to you just a little bit because I'm going to tell you, this is you and me just, we're hanging out right now, okay?
Like you and me, we're best buddies.
I'll probably pour you a glass of Chardonnay.
Love it.
Okay.
And I'm going to slide it over to you and ask you, why would you move into grandpa's house?
I wonder, do you also have an ulterior thing here where it's like we can save a little bit of money?
We'll split the rent here.
We'll split the mortgage.
It works out for us.
Tell me why you would do that.
Because I'm looking at this dysfunction going, surely, Jennifer wouldn't want to participate in that.
Right, right.
So he has offered us a deal-ish.
An offer you can't refuse.
Right, right.
So we're already paying rent.
So that money is already kind of going down the drain, you know, in a end say.
So we're paying towards the house, which is about what we're paying in rent anyway.
So we're not really shelling out more money than we already are.
Okay.
He has stated that this house that he's in now just isn't going to be a good house long term for all of us.
Okay.
So he said if we move in and we pretty much agree to.
take care of him that when we find the next house, when he sells his house, we'll get
whatever money we've put into his house now as we're living there, we'll get back, and then
he'll pay the down payment of a new house for us. This guy should become a politician.
The amount of lies coming out of his mouth, he should be in Congress right now. Because guess what?
He's not going to have any money to give you. He's pretty much banking on that he's going to get a good
chunk of proceeds from the house sale. How is he going to take care of himself?
though, because he would need to take those sales and that would cover a nursing home or
whatever living facility he'd go to, whatever care.
Heaven forbid he doesn't need a nurse or someone to take care of him.
This is all the money he has to his name.
He can't give it to you.
And I would not expect that.
He's told me in depth how much money he has.
I thought you said he only had the $100,000 in the house.
What else does he have?
Oh, no, I mean, he has savings and stuff like that.
I'm just talking about once he sells the house.
So he has like 150,000 in a savings account, and I think he has 40,000 in another savings account.
But he's trying to think how long that's going to last him.
Well, and that's the biggest problem because he's 73 and healthy.
This could go on for another 25 years.
And you could look up and be like, we've paid the datum house off.
Yeah.
And then he's like, oh, I don't, you know, I think that.
At a 25 grand deficit, all of his money is gone in like five years.
So I'm not hitching my wagon to anything this guy's doing and I'm not trusting anything he says.
You don't need it. Jennifer.
You guys can go out and make a life for yourself and buy the house that you want.
In time, nothing's on fire.
We don't need to make these crazy deals to be successful.
I would move out tomorrow and say, love you, grandpa.
We'll visit at Thanksgiving.
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Right, all right.
Laura is in Grey Falls, MT, Montana.
Okay.
Did I get it right, Laura?
Is it Montana?
Yes.
All right.
Got to remember those abbreviations from elementary school pay off.
Elementary school.
I'm telling you.
How can we help out today, Laura?
Yeah.
Thank you so much for taking my call.
So our question is, should we pause baby step two to have the lead paint on the exterior of our house scraped and redone?
Ooh, that's a health hazard, correct?
Major?
Yes, so our children, two of our children have tested with lead exposure in their blood. It's not like horrible, but...
Yes, I'm saying yes.
Yeah.
How much is it going to cost to get rid of this poison that is on your home?
About $10,000.
Really? Just to get it out of there?
Because you've got to repaint the whole thing?
Yeah, so the pain is in horrible condition, so the whole house has to be seen.
scraped to remove whatever's chipping and then they have to repaint the whole thing to seal it.
Okay.
And you guys are in debt right now.
How much debt do you have?
We have $23,000 in student loans and $103,000 on our house.
Okay.
Okay.
So just $23 is your consumer debt?
Yeah, that's where it gets really hard for us because we had planned that we would be done
with that student loan within the next year to year and a house.
And so now we're just like, do we wait the year and scrape and do the house later?
Or do we address this?
I would just make minimum payments on those student loans and stack up as much cash as you can to cash flow this whole thing and be done with it.
I mean, to me, this is an emergency.
If it were my kids, and I'm weird about this kind of stuff too, yes, there's certain things in life that Trump getting out of debt.
for the moment, just for the moment.
And this is one of them.
Like, health is such a big part of our life.
Otherwise, what are we doing it all for?
And this, if you don't deal with this,
it could cause more bills and health issues down the line.
So absolutely, I would pause the debt snowball
and just make minimum payments.
How fast can you guys cash flow the scraping and repainting?
It will be like five, six months.
Is there anything you can sell?
Can either of you work?
extra get side jobs?
Because I wouldn't want to be in this house if I'm telling the truth.
I'd be getting out of there until this thing is settled.
Yeah.
Can you live with family?
Last summer and we just came up with like that would be a horrible financial decision right now.
Yeah.
No, I would not sell over a $10,000 repair if you wanted to look at it like that.
Yeah.
Do you have family nearby?
Yeah, yeah, we do.
And then I'm also wondering.
I'm wondering, can you break it down? I mean, obviously you want to have the house repainted,
but can you do the scraping first? And that's the first thing we do. And then for a while,
your house looks, you know, ratchet. And then once you've saved up the other half and kind of
break it up so it's not, it's a little bit more bite-sized. Does that make sense?
Yeah, that's an interesting thought. We had thought about scraping it ourselves, but then we're
concerned that, like, we're exposing ourselves to the other. I'm not saying scrape it yourself.
I'm just simply saying, how much is it?
Because my guess is it's probably, I don't know,
but it might be more expensive to repaint
than to just chip off or scrape off the bad paint.
So I'd want separate estimates
and just how much is it to get rid of the paint
that's on the house?
You might find that that's 3 or 4,000.
Have you got some bids on that?
We just got a bid for like the whole thing.
So I would check and see if you can get different bids
and maybe you can find someone to scrape for 3
and paint for 4.
Well, now you just save three grand on the project.
Gotcha.
So I would be doing some homework to get that price down
as I stack up cash as fast as possible.
I mean, I'd be flipping things on Facebook marketplace
to try to create some cash.
Like, this is an emergency.
Imagine your child needed an emergency procedure or medicine
and you had to come up with 10 grand to get it.
That's the level of urgency I would personally have for my family.
Yeah, I agree.
I would do the same thing.
And there are certain things, guys.
and we can do a better job of letting you know that because we're no one goes harder in the
paint on debt than than us. We want you to, you know, move hell and high water to get out of debt.
We want you to sacrifice to win. All of that is so important. But we can't let that stop us from
doing the things in the moment that really do require our attention. Obviously, anything regarding
health, we're the first ones to tell you if there's an medical emergency. If somebody's having a
baby, you need to pause. We're the first ones to tell you if somebody loses a job, if somebody goes
into the hospital. You need to pause. And there's other things that need to happen while you're
paying off debt. Like you need to have the right insurance. You need to have life insurance. You need to be
paying for a will. Like there are certain things that it's okay to do while you're doing baby step two
paying off the debt. And you should feel no shame about it. Yeah, you're not a failure because it took
you six months longer to pay off the student loans. No, life. We're still going to cheer you on.
Life be life in, as they say. All right. Andy, Detroit, Michigan on the line. Andy, what's up?
Hi, I'm calling on behalf of my son and daughter-in-law.
They bought a money-pit house, and they thought, although Greece would be enough, but it's not.
If they had paycheck to paycheck and can't fix things.
And now they recently had an emergency flood that made the situation worse.
They've been displaced into a hotel, and now there's talks about it possibly being condemned.
Oh, gosh.
Gosh, is insurance paying, was the flood something like where the water pipes burst or was it like it rained a lot and flood and water came in the house?
Like what was the nature of the flood?
The recent thing that happened was a pipe burst and it caused this whole thing to start.
But they've had floods from rain in the past that caused prior damage.
So insurance is possibly going to cover some of this, but they're finding a lot that was already wrong with it.
So insurance is probably not going to cover.
A lot of things have been wrong.
many years.
Yeah.
They're finding asbestos in the ceiling.
Those wiring that has cross coverings.
Oh.
Did they not get an inspection?
They didn't get an inspection when they purchased the house?
They did.
They did.
Yes.
And they found none of this.
They thought this house was perfect.
How long ago?
How long had they had the house?
It's been about a few years, I believe.
Like a few years like two or a few years like eight?
I think it's been, I want to say three years.
Okay, three years.
So what are you,
Tell us why you're calling.
I'm calling because I want to advise them.
They come to me for advice, and I want to do it right.
I'm wondering if a short sale is what's going to be needed because I don't see.
If insurance will cover this, then everything will be fine.
They can work their way out of this.
But if insurance won't cover this and the house is not livable, I'm afraid for them.
I mean, I'm really, my husband and I are willing to take him into our house and do whatever it takes.
But I just want to have the right advice for them financially, and I don't want to goof that up.
Are they panicking? And I'm not saying your panic is misplaced, but are they panicking as much as you are? Or are they like, we're fine?
They're panicking more so. And when I talk to them, I show a lot different side.
Right. You're like cool and calm.
I'm panicking behind the scenes and trying that to show. Yeah. Okay. Do you know the numbers around the house? Do you know what they paid for?
for it?
I believe it was like around
$130,000.
And it's just a little
800 to 900 square foot house.
But the market, the way the market was
when they bought it, this was all they could get.
And if they just put it for sale
as is, hoping a flipper
will take it, do you think
that, what do you think reasonably?
I mean, I don't know if you've done any research.
Reasonably, what do you think they could get as is?
I don't know. I have not
done that research, but I know they would
lose because they haven't had a chance to pay off very much of this.
Yeah, what's left on their mortgage?
Pardon me?
What's left on their mortgage?
Dad, I don't know.
I don't know specific numbers here because I try not to get too much in their business.
I'm the mother-in-law.
So I'm trying to give advice while not being too much in their business.
Listen, I'm kind of glad that you don't know the numbers.
That makes me know that there's boundaries, which is great.
Have they asked for help?
They ask for advice.
They don't usually ask for finding.
financial help. Okay. That's fine. Well, on the advice front, what I would be doing is helping them
navigate this insurance landscape because that's complicated and it's a headache and you think you got
one denial so you give up. I would encourage them to appeal it, get a public adjuster, do all
the research necessary because this insurance thing is the maker break if they're going to be
able to get out of this unscathed or not. And worst case, there might be an as-is cash buyer
situation and they might be on the hook for the difference. And that's a really.
real problem for them. So I would do everything in my power to guide them through that insurance
process and get this thing covered. Welcome back to the Ramsey show here in the Fair One's Credit
Union studio. We're headed back to the phone lines where George and I find Mark in Albany, New York.
Mark, how can we help out today? Hi, how are you? Doing great. What's up?
So I was just wondering, is it ever okay to use or deplete your emergency fund to avoid taking a loan when you're making a big purchase?
Is the big purchase an emergency?
Something that is urgent, something that is completely necessary, and something that is like time factor?
Yeah, unexpected?
No, it's something that's sort of been expected.
It's for a car because my...
First, my current one is getting a little too expensive to maintain.
Although safety isn't yet a concern, it's slowly getting to that point.
So does the car need repairs?
What do you mean expensive?
So I have to repair the, not have to, but the mileage is suffering from a damaged
catalytic converter and a couple other things.
And it's also just losing value.
I know that shouldn't be my primary concern, but I'm just...
Is there a learner on it?
Is it?
No, there is no loan.
It's paid off.
Okay.
And what kind of car are you looking to get?
How much is that going to cost you?
It would be about $30,000.
And would you be selling the current car?
Yeah, I'd be trading it in most likely.
So you trade it in and pay cash for this next car?
Yes, yes.
If I did not use the emergency fund, then I would be taking out a loan for about half that amount.
What's the trade in amount that you think you're going to get for the existing vehicle if you don't put the repairs in?
I might get three or four thousand.
Oh, okay.
Not much.
All right.
How much is in the emergency fund?
Right now, I believe it's $11,000 or $12,000.
Okay.
So you don't even have the money to even buy this cart.
It's not like you have 30 grand sitting in the emergency fund ready to buy.
that car. Yeah, where's the other money coming from? Well, I have 11 in the emergency fund,
and I've been saving up in a new car fund. I have about 16 or 17 in the new car fund.
Great. So why can't we just spend 16 or 17 since you have a new car fund that you've saved for?
You can get a great car for $17,000. I suppose I could. It's just I found what I've really liked.
And I admit I have a bit, pardon me.
I was just saying ding-dinging, we have a winner.
You got to the actual, the bottom of this, which is I saw it and I want it, and it looks fancier than the $17,000 version.
What kind of car is this?
It's used, so it's not a new car.
Don't worry about that.
It's a 2023-Q-5.
Oh.
I thought we didn't want to get into expensive cars with expensive maintenance and expensive insurance and premium gas.
That is true.
Yes.
But we are.
This is different.
Okay.
So I mean, my answer here is very cut and dry, and we can get into the wise about it.
But I think that you did something very intentional, which you said, I'm going to need a new car soon.
Therefore, it's not really an emergency because you saw it was coming and you started saving money, which I applaud you.
That's exactly what you should be doing.
And you saved up a pretty penny.
You saved up $17,000.
nothing stops you today from saying I'm going to buy $17,000 car today and I'm going to continue to save towards that car fund so that maybe next year or at the appropriate time I can add another $17,000 to it and then I can come up and get my what is it IQ? What does it call?
Q5 the Audi. So I'm curious can you do these repairs now and ride this car for another six months to a year while you save up another $13,000?
For another six months, I'd probably be able to save about $7,000.
Okay.
So that puts us at about $24?
Yeah, just about.
All right.
I mean, I'm looking at them online right now.
I'm looking at some 2023 Q5 sitting at $23,000.
I see.
I see.
So I think it's possible to do some research and negotiate and find the right one for the price.
And maybe it's eight months.
Okay, and then we'll have $25,000.
And so it's up to you, the timeline.
But the goal is don't use the emergency fund except for emergencies.
and save up and pay cash for this car and don't let them talk.
Because here's what's going to happen.
You're going to step onto that lot.
And they're going to say, well, do you want to just see the 2026 model?
I mean, we can get you in for whatever payment you want.
I mean, well, we can work with you.
Sneaky, sneaky.
So I already know the worst thing you can do is say, I want my monthly payment to be this
because they're going to sneak in all kinds of stuff.
Well, we're not even talking about monthly payments.
Even just they're going to try to get you into a fancier car that gives them a higher commission,
talking with extended warranty.
I mean, I just played this game.
They put low jack on a Tesla, which already can find itself, Jade.
They put low jack on there as a little extra.
To try to add a little something.
You can't take that off.
I do feel like, though, when you go to the car dealership and you've done your research online
and you're just like, I'm here to pick up the car, like I'm here to get that car.
I feel like there's less of that.
You allow for less of that kind of inviting end of the sales guy.
It's just, I did my research.
Do you have the car ready?
Here it is great.
Okay.
can you move on the price?
Well, then you got to go to the finance office to talk to that guy, no matter how you're paying.
And then he talks you, he wants to get you into the warranty and the paint protection package.
That's true.
It's exhausting.
It's such a silly game.
I'll be honest.
So Sam and I just upgraded vehicles a couple of, I guess it's only been a couple of two weeks ago for him.
And it really was, it was the best experience ever.
I should give the guy a shout out.
But yeah, looked online.
This is the one we want.
We called ahead of time.
We said, hey, this is the car we're looking at.
He goes, great.
I'll have it ready by the time you pull up.
This is the Toyota in Columbia.
He goes, we'll have it ready when we pulled up.
We pulled up.
It was right there.
He goes, you guys just want to drive it?
He handed us the keys.
He was like, I don't need to go with you.
I trust you.
Just like that.
Wow.
So we go, test drive the car by ourselves.
Come back.
He's like, so he's like, are you guys, how are you wanting to pay for this?
And I said, let's decide the price first and then we'll decide me being sneaky.
He goes, all right.
And he goes, all right.
And he goes, all right.
And he goes, okay, I said, if you can do that deal, I said, we'll walk away.
you know, we'll walk away with the car today.
He comes back, he goes, I think I can get there.
I said, all right, we're paying cash.
That was that on that.
And that's it.
That was it.
So simple.
But you got to get, to your point, got to get to the heart of the matter.
You got to have the walkaway power.
You got to know exactly.
You got to know more about the car than they do, first of all.
Because otherwise, they can talk around you in circles and get you in a car that you
didn't actually want or you didn't ask enough questions about.
I think the worst thing is when you're like, I think I want a new car.
And you just go down to the lot.
And you're just browsing, hoping to be sold.
Danger.
And it's why the CarMax and Carvannas of the world have done so well, because nobody wants
to have to sit there and negotiate and haggle.
They just go, I see that car for that price.
Can I have that?
And they go, sure.
Yeah.
Instead of the normal dealership experience.
When I went to the place, that was their whole thing.
We get you in and out in less than an hour.
That's amazing.
And it was less than an hour, can I just say.
It's not an interrogation.
No interrogation.
It's like a timeshare presentation.
You're there for three and a half hours to drink some cured coffee.
And you don't even walk out with what you wanted.
No.
That's the worst part.
All right, George.
I hope we help Mark.
The key is it's not an emergency.
And thank you for at least admitting it's just a shiny new thing and you want it.
And so now you can look at your piece of crap car and go, well, the catalytic converter is out.
It's going to be a safety issue.
And you go, just say it.
You want a nice new car, at least new to you.
And it's okay.
Just make sure everything, all the things with wheels and motors don't add up to more than half your annual.
income. That's right. And go, there's some opportunity costs here. And if you're willing to take on the
cost of ownership and maintenance and premium gas, which right now, that hurts. Yes, it does.
Go for it. Put it in the budget. Yeah, you got to know the difference between it and an emergency,
guys. We hit it earlier. It's got to be urgent, necessary, boy, and unexpected. Dave Ramsey here,
most people stay stuck with their money because they're not paying attention to it. Most people are
living paycheck to paycheck, stressed out and broke. Don't be most people.
You work way too hard to be broke and feel broke, and you deserve to have something to show for it.
That's why we built the Every Dollar Budget app.
It gives you a personalized plan for your money that shows you how to free up extra money every month
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Plus, you get real coaches guiding you through your plan step by step.
Look, most people hearing this will just keep hoping something changes, but not you.
You're ready to make change happen, starting now.
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All right, today's question of the day is brought to you by Y-ReFi.
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Today's question comes from Carly in South Dakota.
We're debt-free with a fully funded emergency fund,
so I'm creating sinking funds for newer cars and house projects.
I'm guessing that the sinking funds can't be cash in envelopes,
so do I need to open separate savings accounts or separate checking accounts for each goal?
What is the best way to create a sinking fund where I can put my money aside
and not touch it for those expenses?
These are great questions to be asking.
Yeah, very good.
Okay, so let's start with the first question.
She's saying, okay, it's not going to be cash in envelopes.
Do I need separate savings accounts?
You could.
I think it's helpful.
Yeah.
And what's cool is that, so we have our partner Fairwins.
We're in the Fairwin's studio.
Ah, yes.
And what's really cool is they created this just for our fans.
You can have up the 10 different savings accounts that are earmarked for different things.
Wow.
Within their high-ield savings.
So that's what I would do personally is have a car fund because these are big ticket items.
Yeah.
If it's little stuff, you don't need it all.
in separate savings, that gets complicated.
But a big house project or a car, I would label it car.
Otherwise, your emergency fund gets convoluted.
They're actually different accounts or are they like bucketed?
Yeah, they're bucketed it in there.
So you can actually move money around between them.
Oh, wow, that's nice.
It's very convenient.
So that's one feature.
And the sinking fund part, you can set that up in every dollar to actually market as a fund.
And, you know, if it's, let's say, $1,200 for the year is what you need.
Yep.
You can set a sinking fund for $100 a month.
in every dollar. Perfect. I love that. And that's just one of the ways that every dollar really helps you
have a functioning budget, doing the things that you want to do. I always say good budget is
detailed, realistic, and flexible. And that's what you can do. The budget's very flexible. You can
add the line items in there. You connect your bank. I'm a pro bank connect. You can track your transactions.
You can set goals, all of those things you can do within every dollar. And you can manage your sinking
funds. I love that. All right. So great. Mary's in Denver, Colorado.
How can we help out today?
My question is, I am married.
And we're having kind of a dispute on retirement.
I contribute a lot to my retirement account, and my husband contributes nothing, just social security.
So I'm asking your advice on how to address this issue.
So how old are you guys?
I'm 37 and my husband is 39.
Okay. And when you say he, his goal is we'll just live off Social Security. Is that what I hear you saying?
It's worked for his parents and he believes that that's all he needs.
Okay. Are you guys out of debt?
We are. We're on baby step four.
Okay. So just to frame up this conversation and then we're going to go to town on this.
So let's talk about Social Security for a brief moment because he's not the only person.
in the world who has had that plan. But the truth is social security is only going to replace about
40% of your income. And that's if it's still existent. The trust fund is going to be depleted by,
I think, 2032 or something. And that's going to lower the benefits by probably 23% or so.
Yeah. And the average payment right now for Social Security is like $2,000. Yeah, 18 to $2,000,
which is really nothing. You guys factor in inflation. Imagine 30 years from now how much $2,000 is going to get
you. Yeah. So I think some of it is the actual facts and it may, it may need to come from someone
else. You guys might need to sit down with a financial advisor, a smart vester pro, and have
them walk him through the reality of the situation and what could be. So sure, could you get by
off of Social Security? Ask people who are doing it. It's a sad reality. That's usually the
calls that we get. When people call in and their parents or their grandparents,
parents if, quote, all they have is social security, then the rest of the family, the younger
members of the family are on the hook or feel like they're on the hook to help that person survive.
And that is certainly not the position you want.
I think social security is fine as supplement, you know, as a supplemental piece of your
retirement, but it should not be the main piece.
Okay.
We've made that argument.
So let's talk about the convincing part.
So you're investing.
How much are you doing the 15% or?
Correct. Yeah, I do 15% and I make significantly a lot more than my husband. And I also work full-time and he works kind of part-time.
Why is that? Wow.
My issue is, well, he works for his dad and his dad owns a concrete company and his dad is getting to, in my opinion, needs to retire.
and it's the business is just not,
it's just not going to really go anywhere.
What's he earned working part-time there?
What's he earned working part-time there?
He makes about $40,000 a year.
And what do you earn?
I make about $55,000, or sorry, $155,000.
$155,000.
Do you, and if you don't want to answer this, you don't have to,
but do you feel like because your income is so solid that he kind of feels like he can coast and doesn't really need to do much?
Yeah, I do.
He also has three kids.
I'm a stepmom to three kids and I have none of my own.
So my concern, I guess long term is in my family, we have a lot of inheritance coming down the line here.
And I want to protect myself.
And if I have a child of my own,
you know, we're trying, but it's not working.
And so I'm saying if, if I have a child of my own, I want to be able to pass down my family's inheritance to my child.
And I also want to, you know, I just want to protect myself.
I'm not saying like we're headed for like a divorce, but I just in some way feel like I'm being taken advantage of.
And I just don't know how to navigate it.
Well, you're seeing some red flags and you don't want to ignore them.
And I think that that's very smart and scary.
It's scary to not put your, you know, bury your face in the ground.
You're trying to be alert and see what's going on.
And I applaud you for that.
Have you actually shared your why behind all of this?
Not asking him, why is he not contributing?
But saying, here's why I'm scared.
Here's why I'm contributing.
I have a fear of not being prepared.
I want to leave an inheritance to our children and their children.
I want freedom in retirement.
I want to be able to travel.
I don't want financial stress.
Does he care about any of that if you shared it with him?
Yeah, I've shared it with him.
And, yeah, I've shared it with him.
Before we even got married, I shared with him my retirement dreams.
I want to have multiple homes in different states.
I want to be able to travel.
I want to see my family.
I've shared all of that before we even got married because it was a concern of mine.
And I've just worked very hard in my career.
I've earned, you know, where I'm at.
And what's his response?
He says that he, I think he honestly, he's just consent, being at home, being around his children.
I think that over the years, his dreams have kind of changed compared to mine.
Has he given up?
Or is that truly what he wants, he just wants to be a stay-at-home dad?
Like, which do you think it is honestly?
I think it's a little bit of both.
I think that he doesn't, I think honestly he feels a little defeated, the fact that I make so much more money and that I'm already so far ahead of my retirement.
And when I say I want to travel and I want to see my family, I have a large family, he has a very small family.
I want to go golf and do all these things.
He's very content being at home.
It's just like very different.
It's just like you guys were never aligned on any of these, like, values and goals.
It was just sort of like, well, we're different.
It'll be fine.
But now, I mean, there's a chasm that's growing between.
you guys as you are very driven, you're ambitious, you have certain goals and dreams, and he's
gone, that's not for me. And he, and the truth is he doesn't care about those for you. How long have you
been married? Right. We've been married five years, and I think that the things have changed. We've
been together almost nine, and his children have grown up. They're now 2018, and we have an 11-year-old,
and the 20-year-old has a baby, and I think things as the children have gotten older, his priorities have
become more of I want to be around my grandchildren, I want to be around my children, and less about
traveling and doing all those things. But I feel free to do that because I don't have a child
myself. I'll be honest with you, Mary, this sounds like something that can only be solved in a counselor's
office. This is a marriage problem, far more than a financial problem. And I hope you guys can
figure it out in a line on some vision for your future. You spend hours researching before making a
major purchase like a home or car, but it's also a good idea to put in the work searching for
the right insurance coverage. To protect your biggest assets, I recommend using Ramsey trusted
pros. Whether you're looking for car, home, or any other type of insurance, Ramsey trusted
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go to Ramsey Solutions.com slash store or quick the link in the description. If you're watching,
remember, the sale ends Monday, Monday, Monday. All right, we've got, not bad. We got Grace,
who's in Dayton, Ohio. Hey, Grace. How can George and I help today? Hi there. Good afternoon. So,
My question is regarding whether I should use my home equity to pay for college.
I am a single mom to two teenagers, ages 14 and 16.
Do you recommend a HELOC for this type of situation?
I owe $96,000 on the home, and I have roughly $200,000 in equity.
Oh, boy.
Okay.
So let me start with the empathy, which is, I love that you're thinking about ways for your kids not to go into debt.
I love that you're thinking about ways to pay for college that doesn't put the debt burden on them.
However, putting it on you and your home and your place of safety and security is something that I would never, ever, ever recommend.
And the reason is...
Okay.
Yeah, that HELOC is like a credit card attached to your house.
So you're going backwards.
Now you've got a variable interest rate while putting you at risk for foreclosure if you miss payments.
So you're trading this unsecured education debt for.
secure debt attached to your house.
And let's unpack that just a little bit more because I think it could be helpful for you
and anybody listening.
Guys, when you bought a house, you weren't thinking to yourself, oh, if I buy this house,
it would make a very good credit card for me.
You bought the house thinking, this is a way that I can build wealth.
This is a way that I can have security.
This is a place of, do you see what I'm saying, financial security and emotional security?
You're like resetting the clock on when you can retire now, which puts you at risk of you becoming a burden to your kids.
So I want them to go to school debt free, but let's make a plan to take debt off the table and go, okay, what are all the ways, all the levers we can pull that don't involve debt?
And that might mean they're going to work part-time.
It might mean they're going to go to a two-year community college to knock out their prerex.
How old are they?
Can save in a 529 plan.
How old are they?
Are they ready to go right now?
They're 14 and 16.
Okay.
So there's a little bit of time.
Have there been conversations about college plans and what they might want to do?
Because they're still young enough that they don't know.
Yeah.
They do know they would love to go to a four-year school.
So I'm just trying to figure out how I can potentially make that work for them.
And is that, do they want to stay in state?
Because I would start to set some boundaries on, hey, guess what?
school costs this much money. It's going to be $200,000 for you to go out of state to this quote-unquote dream school or quote name brand school. Or you can go to the school down the road for $5,000 a semester. So you can start to help them understand the math on this.
Yes, I'm with you. And I think they're very willing to go to a reasonable in-state school. I'm just not even sure I can afford that lower cost route with, you know, what I'm looking.
But that's fact. You're not factoring in if they get scholarships, grants.
Yeah. And that's where the pressures on to do really well in school.
Get really good grades on those SATs.
Yeah. And maybe there's even athletic scholarships. I don't know what they're into.
But I would be looking at every scholarship in grant possible, you saving up as much as you can in a college savings account, like a 529 plan, and having them choose an affordable school and possibly working part time and even working now to start saving up for that.
Doing community college on those first gen eds is going to save you a ton, a ton. I wish I had done it if I had been able to. So that plus what George is saying, I mean, that's how people, that's exactly how people do it. People call in all the time who paid cash for college and that's the way they do it. And I would say to George's point, don't be afraid to let them have some skin in the game. You know, this is the point, especially for the 16 year old, applying for scholarships and creating an environment where they can
be accepted for those scholarships, that ought to be their full-time job, you know, also while they're
working at a supermarket or McDonald's or wherever else they're working. So them having skin in the game,
I think, is actually really, really healthy for their college relationship because they'll value it more.
Okay. I like that. Yeah. And if you want some help with the conversation, you can go watch Borrowed
Future. It's a free documentary we created. It's on our YouTube channel. Just search Borrowed Future.
and that will cause them to be asking questions.
And it will likely scare them away from going into debt for college.
And so that way we can do the work for you.
I also talk about this in my book, Breaking Free from Broke.
I have a whole chapter on student loans and at the end how to go to college debt free.
That's the goal because I don't want to set you back in retirement and you just take on the burden and go,
well, at least the kids went to school debt free.
Now I'm shackled to debt for the next 20 years.
Yeah.
And I mean, we see that not just with Helox grace, but even with folks doing parent plus
loans. It's just, it really is, I think what it is is parent guilt, in this case, mom guilt,
where it's like, I don't want to be the reason that they go into debt. Or I didn't do a good
enough job. Yes. And it reflects on me as a parent. And the truth is, I've said this before and
I'll say it again. The ability to pay for college is a privilege, both for the parent and for the
the child. If you're, there's plenty of people who meet us on down the line. Their kids have already
gone to school and they never, they didn't find Ramsey solutions in time to kind of create that
pathway. And that's okay. Like, we're all learning. We're all making mistakes. But I will say the
most important thing that you can do, even more so than paying for the college, is just starting
to have the conversation very early and very often on what the expectations are. So if you're just
saying, hey, this is what my parents did for me. They said, there is no college fund. We don't have the
529, if Jade, if you want to go to college, you either need to be very smart or very good at
sports. And they said that straight up. And I was like, okay, got it. Let me work on this. Yes.
And kids, I think, I hate to say the word kids, teenagers, I think they're responsive to that,
especially if it's the household that you brought them up in, which is, hey, we're responsible for
ourselves and we're self-starters and that sort of thing. So I was just at a local high school in
in Columbia, Tennessee, and we just released this video on my YouTube channel, I asked high schoolers
money questions they weren't ready for. Oh. And it was shocking to me, Jay, that I was the first
person to be asking them questions like, hey, what do you want to do after high school? Okay, what's that
going to cost you? What do you plan on taking student loans? Yeah. How much student loans would you,
how much debt would you be willing to go into to get this degree? And what, was it, was it crazy?
What they were saying? Oh, they had, well, the funniest one was this girl wanted to be, she said, I want to
stay at home. I went that sweet. You want to have kids? No, she said, no, I don't want kids. I said, you
want to be a stay-at-home wife. I said, how will you spend your time? She said, shopping. Oh.
And I said, I wish you the best of luck with this plan. And God bless the man who signs up for that.
Oh, but a lot of the kids were just sort of like, well, college is the next step because I was told
it's the next step. I don't really have a game plan. I hope I have a job on the other side that
pays me enough to knock out my student loans and whatever other debt I have. And so it just
It was a good reminder that parents need to be having these conversations early and often.
It should not be a YouTuber like me asking your kid for the first time at 16 or 17.
Very good point.
How they're going to pay for college?
What's the game plan?
Why are they going?
Because you heard her say, well, they just want to go to a four-year school.
Well, why?
Because their friends are going?
Yeah, exactly.
Because the football team is great.
Exactly.
That's the real reason kids are going.
The brochures, they don't talk about how great the library is and the quality of education.
They're showing you the water slides, the cafeteria, the football team, how exciting it's going to be.
That's how they market these things to get you to spend what you spend.
I also think another driver is just like the freedom.
The way I get freedom is I go to college.
Like I have to go away.
Then I can have a dorm room.
And the further I go away, the better.
And also the more expensive.
Yeah.
So true, George.
Having these conversations so, so important.
And again, if you're able to do a 529 and fund your kids.
kids college, that's amazing. What a privilege. That's fabulous. Good for you, good for them.
But if you're not able to, that's also okay. As long as you're having these conversations,
as long as you take debt off the table, totally fine to tell your kid, hey, you're going to work
for this. I'm going to work for this and you are too and you're going to work more.
They may not thank you now, but I promise you, when they're in their 20s and they look at all
their friends with student loan debt, they're going to go, mom, thank you. Dad, thank you for
allowing me to avoid student loans.
Hey, do you ever get to Memorial Day weekend and wonder, how is it almost June?
Summer's almost here. Why do I feel like I'm in the same spot? This weekend, you can grab two hardcover books and assessments for 20 bucks. And that matters because summer chaos is about to ramp up and you want to keep your focus. Kids out of school, trips, Fourth of July party. Before it all gets wild, grab the books and tools that help you stay on track. So when it all hits, you are still on track.
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Well, we're coming to the end of the line, so that means one thing.
Scripture and quote of the day, George.
Can't miss it.
Galatians chapter 6, verse 4 through 5 says, each one should test their own actions.
Then they can take pride in themselves alone without comparing themselves to someone else.
For each one should carry their own load.
It really said, check yourself before you wreck yourself.
Your best check yourself before you wreck yourself.
All right, Mark Twain, not Dr.
Dre said, a man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.
I'll chew on that.
I'll chew on that a little bit.
Come on, Mark Twain.
We were just on Dr. Dre and here you come.
All right.
The Dre of his time, some say.
Some say.
All right.
Wow, that really makes me want to laugh.
Alex from Los Angeles is on the line.
What's going on, Alex?
Hi, guys.
Thank you for the Dr. Jay shout out.
He's a real good.
Yeah.
So I had a question.
basically for how do the baby steps involve a newborn baby that we had with my partner?
And with those baby steps, what are the siding factors that decide who moves in with who?
Is it who makes the most money? Is it who's closer to work? Is it who has the most family around?
How does that all tie in together?
Well, they're definitely all factors.
A coin toss or a thumb war would be my favorite options.
Oh, man.
Are you guys getting married or tell us, tell us about the nature of the relationship?
That is, that is in the upcoming future.
I'm getting married together, of course, having a strong family foundation to begin with.
So again, yeah, that's in the line.
And then just, I guess, just making sure that I do the best that I can for my family,
whether it's saving the most money, whether it's, you know, moving into the cheap city.
I just want to see what guidelines are there for the baby steps and, you know, creating a family.
Well, are you and your partner in different cities?
You've mentioned that a couple of times.
Yes.
Where are you and where is she?
It's about a 40-minute commute from the boat city.
Okay.
We'll keep that confidential.
I want to get to your question, and I don't want to sidetrack it, but I'm kind of like, why not just get married?
Solidify it.
The baby's here.
There's no question you're going to be living together and starting a family together.
I think, George, that that would be top on my list.
first and then I'd be looking at spots.
We can have the party later, but why not, if we're doing this thing, we're in this
together for life with this new baby, why not just go down in the courthouse, get the
marriage certificate and have some protections in place for both of you?
Definitely. I feel like that would definitely make the household stronger income as well.
You know, we can, you know, get combined incomes and get our goals going, get the baby steps
knocked out, but...
Yeah.
It's more secure for both of you.
Yeah, definitely.
She's not really into this, like, mindset, like saving money and, you know, building a good
foundation.
So I guess that's kind of what...
What is she into?
Coming with me.
Like, working, going home, buying stuff, jewelry, things like that.
Got it.
Okay.
Are you the saver?
How much money do you have?
Yeah, I'd say so.
About a couple, 15 or 20.
And do you have any debt?
Um, I'm, yes, I do. I'm working on paying that off. Yes.
Okay.
Um, it's about 20 in total. So, yeah.
What she have, do you know?
I don't know. That's kind of, you know, on her side of the court. Um, we haven't been as vocal financially.
Um, but she does know that I have this mindset of getting towards that end of the baby steps.
But again, I don't want to scare her away and be like, oh, man, if I'm moving with him.
Can we be real, Alex?
You guys made a baby together. I think it's.
It's time to get real with each other.
Well, how new is the newborn?
How young is this baby?
One month, one month.
I will say this.
Come at me in the comments.
But if you have this conversation with a one month old and she's still riding high on hormones and whatever, it may not end well for you tonight.
So I might spend the next one to two months and gather my information in journal and think through what it is that I want to say.
and kind of you do some self-preparation, give her some time to kind of adjust to life,
then have the conversation, ease into it.
Postpartum is real.
It's a real thing.
You're talking to somebody who was crazy.
Was she working before?
She was, but she's been off leave ever since, so about a month with no work.
I went back to work two weeks after she was born.
So how is she covering her bills and the baby right now?
Through her savings that she has, she did tell me she has a little bit
and she also has family leave.
So I don't think she's lost too much of her income.
Okay.
What's the expectation of you chipping in and helping pay for things?
Well, I mean, if she moved in with me, I'd be covering the rent for both of us together
and my daughter, you know, just eating the household, in a sense, putting food on the table.
How long did, can I just ask, and no judgment, how long did you guys know each other before the baby?
Before the pregnancy?
A few years.
Okay.
So you know her.
Okay.
Definitely. We've been, yeah, she knows my family. I know her family.
Okay, good, good, good. But, yeah.
And do you, do you live near where you work? You're working in office?
I do, yes. I got promoted recently as well. I started a new position in two weeks.
Congrats. What are you making?
I like being closer than my 90.
Awesome. And what was she doing and what is she making?
The same thing, but she's making 70.
Okay. And she does plan on going back to work at this point?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, I mean, it's a discussion for you two to have as far as who's going to go where and what the commutes are like.
There's some logistical pieces of this that I would factor into the equation.
And, you know, what is she paying for rent?
What are you paying for rent?
How much can we afford together as our family as we do a budget together?
And again, I would not combine incomes until you're married and I would get married very soon so that we can combine our lives fully.
Because until then, this is just going to be messy and awkward and Venmoing each other.
The things I'd be thinking about as priorities,
and deciding, I'd be thinking about if we need family around for child care, then whoever's closest
to the family who has been said that they would help. I'm thinking about that. I'm thinking about
the place with the lower rent because if something happens and she becomes more attached than she
thought she was going to be and decides, you know what, I kind of do want to be home more.
Having a lower cost of living is going to behoove you. So those are the two things that
stick out to me right away as being like possible drivers on this. I don't think the size of the
apartment would be as big of a driver because, you know, if you decide to have more children down the
line, you can always move. That that's fine. But I think those top two tend to be the ones that it's like,
okay, daycare is always a big ticket thing. So having family is so important. And then of course, yeah,
the cost of the rent. And lease agreements as well. Like who signed up for what? How much time is left on
the lease? Can we get out early? Which one?
has the least amount of damage if we exit early.
And so I would be looking into all those factors.
And those are things you can do now, kind of on your own.
You know, you can ask her for some details without getting into the weeds.
But there's going to be a lot of logistics here to figure out.
And again, it's just going to simplify everything.
If we can combine our life, be married, it's just one team, one dream.
One team, one band, one sound.
Do you remember drumline?
Nick Cannon?
I missed that one.
You've never seen drumline?
Have we had this discussion?
I think we didn't.
I think you judged me last time.
I probably did listen. The movie's not all that good. Do I look like a guy who would enjoy
drumline? Yeah, it's HBCU centered. I get it. Well, it's more of the, I don't do band stuff.
You do indie bands. Yeah, I'm punk rock. Yeah, I'm punk rock, all right. Bonnevere. There we go.
Are you happy that I said it the right way? Thank you for not saying Bon Iver.
You're welcome. You're offensive to all people groups. Well, let it be known that I have said it that way as
well, and I believe you were the one who corrected me, so. Oh, that's great. You'll be living in
learn. All right. Do we want to take Jessica or can we, can we get to it? Can we take a social
question? We have some great ones here. All right. Jessica, call us back tomorrow. I promise we'll get
to you. But if people, let me just say this. People don't know this. The Ramsey show is on the
radio as much as it is on YouTube. And so we have a clock guys that we have to hit. We have to go to
break at a certain time. We have to do all that. So don't be mad at us. The segments are like exactly
eight minutes and 34 seconds and it's our job to police that and try to get in and out.
And that's why sometimes it's like we feel like we don't take as much time.
Don't be mad at us. It's just the clock. We have to make the radio folks happy to. Well,
anyway, less than a minute. What do you got for me? All right. Should we include our child's
529 accounts as part of our net worth or not since they're going to be spent eventually?
Oh, that's a fun one. I like that question. I mean, you can include it for now, but I wouldn't include it as
far as your nest egg and retirement projections. But yes, it is an asset. And who knows if they'll actually
use all of it. Yeah. And it's growing. On accounting terms, it all counts. But I would not
not counted as far as my future financial plans. Do you think about yours when you, when you sit at night
and you ponder your network? I do. You know, well, I check it to see where it's at, because every month
I contribute. So I like to see the number go up and to the right. That does make me feel good about
my kids' futures. I agree. I see what you did there. Pardon the pun. Well, guys, remember,
there's ultimately only one way to financial peace, and that's to walk daily with the Prince of Peace,
Christ Jesus.
