The Reel Rejects - REJECT RECAP - Dragonball: Evolution MOVIE REVIEW!

Episode Date: May 19, 2022

So, as we branch out into more movie reactions & commentaries, we decided to check out the famously maligned Dragonball film adaptation starring Shameless' Justin Chatwin as Goku, Emmy Rossum as Bulma, Jamie Chung as Chi Chi, Chow Yun Fat as Master Roshi, and James Marsters as Piccolo! Is it So Bad It's Good, or just.. SO Bad? Join us for our Credits Discussion & Movie Review of Dragonball: EVOLUTION!! And, as always, our Reaction Highlights reel can be found on our YouTube Channel and, if you'd like to sync up with your own copy & experience the WHOLE movie with us, come join us over on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/posts/dragonball-2009-66419104 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/the-reel-rejects/support Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh! Tasty high note. Oh, hi, don't mind me. I'm practicing my new baritone sacks. I just heard PayPal's paying for people's stuff. Every day for 100 days and there's 10 million up for grabs. All you have to do is use PayPal checkout online. So there's never been a better time to buy a few things off the old wish list. Like this leaf floor! PayPal could pay for your purchase.

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The chopping of onions and cilantro. We call our playlist real. Order now. Chipotle, for real. Hello there, Reject Nation. Welcome to our unadulterated, unfiltered, dragonball evolution, movie, review, and discussion, breakdown, etc. This was quite an experience, to say the least. We don't hold back, but it's a fun discussion.

As always, you can find the full-length stream along over at our Patreon page. If you want to subject yourself to that, bring your own copy, sync up, and watch along with us. Or you can check out the reaction highlights on YouTube as well. Appreciate all of you guys for listening and subscribing to the audio podcasts here, wherever you are. And we will catch you on the next one for now. Enjoy. Cool. James Wong, you did this.

James Wong, director of the hit Jet Lee action time travel multiverse movie, The One. The One is much better than this. Stephen Chow produced it. Is this the same Stephen Chow? I think Stephen Chow was originally. supposed to direct this actually or at least they asked him to I could see some of the wannabe style of it but now the the one at least had good action yeah this had no good action this didn't have a single oh poor ADI this didn't have a single

good fight scene no that was that cool effect that was that one effect that was kind of neat just a chat win Emmy Ross yeah it's Jamie Chung I do yeah good call good catch yeah it is James first it is from fucking buffy I kept sitting there going why does his face look so familiar yeah yes Spock it is Ernie Hudson I was just couldn't believe her he would say yes I would he be in this why at all I'm just gonna Google and see if there's post-credit scene. I don't want to risk missing any other scenes that might be hidden in here.

You know, I could have gone for so bad it's good, but that was not even that. And it is, all yeah, my expectations were so low. To the point, I was like, maybe it'll just be like, it's so fun because of how bad it is, and it couldn't even get there. So in a sense, what you're saying is that this exceeded your expectations. Yeah. Put that on the poster. Put that on a DVD re-release.

No, it was just boring. Like, just eventually got really boring. I was more into it when it was like nothing like the manga or nothing like the anime. Or he's like going to high school. Yeah, where it feels like. I was like, this is stupid, but it's enjoyable. And then when it was, oh, man. now you just lost me now we're in a bunch of green screen desert locations and

everything looks okay that's only post-crediting we're stopping this we'll talk about it yeah we're done with Jesus Christ sorry guys I can't give you the I don't I think I think everyone involved in this movie wants to be forgotten in this movie so don't worry we will not watch the credits normally watch out of respect all right we begin with this movie okay um what did it do right it uh here's one here's one it's set up uh what the dragon balls are supposed to do that was clear yeah one thing the movie did right that was fine uh-huh i'm so surprised at how this turned out partly because what year what year was this movie made

Well, either way. I feel like this was made far past an era. This feels like it was made 20 years before it was actually made. This feels like a late 90s, early 2000s, like bargain bin would be that somehow managed to be grafted onto like the biggest anime property at the time. I guess that's why I'm surprised at how this turned out because there was, this lacked. so much um I'm really trying to like it's this is the kind of movie that has been I know has been clowned on forever and and and I don't want to just like be another thing to you don't want to just throw you like oh are you jat ranting about trying well evolution yeah

watch me rant it's not worth that um See, my method with doing reactions is very simple. Just reflect how a movie's making me feel or a show or a trailer. It's simple, right? It's all it takes for people. And I just feel like so empty. So you took on Goku's, you know, demeanor over the course of the movie. Dude, he is so bad.

He's so zen. He is not even... He's not affected by anything. He's so bad. Like, God damn, I don't enjoy bashing on actors' performances, but halfway through, I was like, wow, this guy is, like, not good in this movie. He's not even trying to be good, except for maybe towards the end. I don't know what is, because his approach was so inconsistent.

It was either, like, okay, maybe you were misguided and you went for subtle. But then other times I'm like, why are you doing this, like, anime to literally, delivery voice in certain scenes so it just did not mesh whatever he was doing it and bottom line like it there's one thing with being subtle and like playing it into like the body language and the eyes and then there are other times when I'm just like now you just look dead behind the eyes man I get there's like nothing there was just like you're not Ryan Gosling yeah you can't pull this off you can't just pull your eyelids down a little bit and have that be the 1,000 miles still.

You actually got to be, like, thinking about character life to do that. Yeah, everything felt like it was an audition. Everyone felt like they were auditioning. Yeah. Like, everyone felt that way. I like Jamie Chung. She, I mean, he seemed the most engaged in the scenes with her. I mean, she was good.

She's good. She's a great actress. Yeah. He's a great actress. Yeah. And she just crackles with energy, for sure. And she brought the most life in here. Absolutely.

I do think it's really funny how whenever, aren't they like in the, in the show, like they were like childhood friends, right? And she was always smitten with him, am I getting that correct or am I thinking of someone else? Yeah. My memory is so like, whoop. Yeah. Yeah.

But either way, like every time he shows up, she's just like, drop everything. Yeah. Yeah. I'm all about you. I am committed to you forever. Even though we've seen the entirety of your relationship so far on screen. It seems somehow like you are just fixated on this guy who you just finally started to talk to a day ago. Everything falls either flat or a bit annoying.

I was never like so annoyed that I wanted to turn it off. I was just annoyed enough it just felt like what's the word I'm looking for it's not exactly a harsh word tedious tedious yes tedious is good

good word to describe this yeah I'll meet you there did it was like moving so fast but I could not care about anything that I'm like whatever gets this movie over fast fucking wrap it up yeah like the way plot points work

in this are just so rushed and it doesn't even bother me because it's so boring like it's boring and I think that's the biggest insult you could do for any movie is make it

boring yeah then I can't you can't handle boring especially a movie with as broad of a lore and as colorful of a source material and as

I don't want to say high production value as this was, but clearly they wanted to throw a lot of effects at this and so for such an effects heavy well the thing well what I mean by that is that like there's so many inexplicable green screens like there are CG creatures and stuff

but their sets are awful though the sets are awful the green screen war the thing is for so much of the movie because of the awful sets and then the green screens that look and come across very obvious and are clearly doing certain things where you have these motion issues that clash with the subjects on screen and all those things work together to make it feel like you're watching some kind of lost episode of Power Rangers but like way less engaging than Power Rangers even because

and I don't know if it's me you know maybe it's just the quality of the stream we had or something but there yeah there are these moments where even just like the the quality of the the film just looked like it was it literally started to feel like a low budget like a Power Ranger show. Yeah no, it looked like that. Mortal Kombat Annihilation. It was

awful. The villain Piccolo. Oh my goodness. Great. See, I'm not even here to like talk about accuracies right. None of that is upsetting to me because I don't remember well enough

to be, you know, offended. yeah piccolo is this is one of the worst villains I've ever seen this is like a terrible terrible villain oh yeah he's just

he spends the entire movie in his big sky ship in his bondage costume just being grumpy and serious well he's got the okay I'm used to the cliche of male

bad guy has like fucking awesome fan fatale lady who does the violence but that's the thing though is they usually send the that character to be the hitman

while the other guy's like genius super villain and this guy's nothing he's nothing he's nothing he's just like a dude who has a couple of few lines a dude with a cool car

who wants power and he crushes the house sure but then it makes me go, what's the point of your evil henchman if you can do that? Yeah, what do you mean? It seems like you would get everything done much more efficiently if you would just go devastate everyone until you got your dragon. And you would be a villain then.

You would actually be a real villain by that point if you were the one going in there killing people all the time and like you were just like a man on a mission. You know, that would have been cool. It's like out for revenge. But there's this movie for a movie that supposedly is seven days before the world ends has no pulse. There's no pulse to this film. They're like an awful version of Dark Side and Steppin' Wolf.

It's just like, because that's all he gets to do is just sort of stand around while his hench lady does all the work. And then the ending fight isn't even, you know, something to behold really. Like they didn't give him anything to work with at all. And I mean, I like James Marsters, but underneath the makeup and the generic costume they put him in the yeah it's just like there's nothing it doesn't go like there's no direction to anything well the dynamic is insanely flat between him and woman person so flat the way the ensemble forms feels just bizarre it's just perfunctory

it's just the plot is the plot is the main character and as it moves an ensemble happens yeah I lost track of like, wait, where are we? I don't care. That's a bad sign, yeah. Because I feel like even a so bad it's good movie sometimes will compel you to keep track, even if it's, you know, a wild delivery of ideas or whatever. Street Fighter is so bad, it's good. Street Fighter, that is like, so bad it's good.

I really enjoy the hell out of Street Fighter. It's charming. there you go this is not very charming no there's no fun it's not there's lack of personality oh man that was really that was rough

this feels like if you watched it feels like you watched us so bad it's a good movie but where most of the really endearing parts got edited out for TV and this is like the TNT cut your leftover with yeah you know and yeah

it's like even Chow Yun fat like I enjoyed watching him but I'm like oh how did they What dirt did they have on you? Why is Ernie Hudson here? Why are you guys doing? Like, I get why Justin Chowin and Emmy Rossum, who I believe both are on Shableness together.

Like, I believe, like, yeah, they weren't there yet. So sure, they're in this movie. But yeah, like, Chaya and Fat, like, especially because this is borrowing from, you know, it's borrowing from Japanese anime, but Chowai and Fat obviously has tons of experience with combat martial arts on the screen. So I'm like, sure, if this was any...

If this was approaching in any way... Like, this feels like one of those adaptations that doesn't even seem like it really cared to approach trying to honor the level of what it was supposed to be. So, yeah, I'm like, why... This must have looked really good on paper or something. Because I can't think... I don't know about that.

There's no way. Because, yeah, this feels... No way. This feels... Yeah, like, I don't know. And I don't feel like he would need to slum it like this. But, you know, here we are, I guess. And it's weird because, yeah, it's like everything, too.

It's the one thing that feels the most like an anime is the fact that pretty much everything is ADR'd, and yeah, all the delivery is stilted and animation-y, you know, to a different degree, but that just makes the performances look bad on most of these characters. When it's, when the world is at stake, and yet there feels like there's no stakes at all,

you've got a real problem on your hands. Yeah, it feels like nothing matters. And it doesn't even feel like there's momentum for the main place. The whole movie, is the same demeanor as goku pretty much it's like piccolo in the post credit scene like they really built it up like he's still alive like oh i was i never like felt threatened by this guy yeah you didn't even see if i get a real chance of winning ever no he's he's not scary yeah he's nothing he does the requisite you know you killed my grandfather oh no but yeah otherwise he's just

standing around being grumpy on his ship and then at the end you know he wakes up and you you're supposed to feel this port tent but it's it's the same stillty he just kind of looks and I can tell you're just holding for the shot yeah it's one of those where yeah you feel the artifice almost the entire time it's so flat yeah and again movies like this at the end of the day it's like just get get some cool action that's lit like as much as I don't want to be that kind of viewer I'm like yeah that's all you need for this is that could save this entire movie yeah it's like if you have one good quality that can make the other things weirdly feel charming yeah like you literally you keep this movie exactly the same but if the

action was good because it was like competent well done imaginative and then you go back to the shitty scenes yeah somehow those shitty scenes will feel at least like kind of charming Because it'll take on the charm of an old martial arts movie where the martial arts probably was actually good and the scenes were, you know, stiltie or whatever, you know, like it'll, yeah, feel like a lost, you know, bargain bin martial arts gem. Or something, I guess. Yeah, here it just feels like a weird, like music video mess from the 2000s. I don't know what they were going for with this film. Yeah, it's like nothing to stout. I have no idea what they were going for.

It's just, this is like, the weirdest, like terrible crowdfunded. No, yeah, it feels like a crowdfunded movie. And I'm like, I can't tell where this is taking place. And I mean, I know it's a different time, but it's also just like weird to have a completely unaddressed. Like, yeah, I guess. Why is Goku white?

Yeah, why is Goku? Why is Goku white? Around the end when they're like, you know, you got to be both Goku and whatever the other, you know, werewolf entity's name is and I'm like both these Japanese names on this white character who I thought again different time less stress in clarifying these things but a time in which I feel like it would still stand out that this is just a white dude and I feel like they could have even thrown in one line of dialogue saying that like he's mixed ethnicity or or his grandfather is

not his real or something why did they name him Goku it draws the yeah this not like it's just different time it's he's comes from a lineage of Asian people yeah so you have to address it in some way like you're calling attention to itself unless he's playing like an Asian guy didn't you see how that informed his performance he's clearly doing an impersonation of Asian people I I don't know what that was um that was really that was really that was really bad. That's just like, that's like bum me out kind of bad. Yeah. Not even

a movie has to be so bad that you walk in expecting it to be so bad and then somehow you still walk away pumped out. Right now yeah. It's such a weird feeling. And it very, it's not like I had a hopes that they're like, maybe it's not as bad. Like, no, I had a feeling it would be

bad, but like, oh no, I just I'm not even like enraged. I'm just bummed, you know? Yeah. You wanted to have. some fun with this like this can't does this have a cult following for being like amusing because I don't even see how they could reach that standard uh yeah I mean I could maybe fathom how I could but it doesn't seem to have enough uniquely terrible I feel like I like in this aftermath here sitting here just

thinking about it I feel like I was just told a story by a kid no I feel like it was It was crowdfunded by some filmmakers' dad. My son has this idea for the show he really likes, and we're going to make it ourselves. Oh, you've got the Dragon Ball property, yeah, but my son wants to direct, so let him direct. Let him direct. We've got a lot of ideas. I know that's not the case. It's James Wong with a G.

You know, I want people to know in case you're only listening. It's Wong with not Wan. Wong and It's funny because both Asian directors who's a much more superior Yeah Hey hey

So we'll hear no shitty words About the one all right The one is good That's not good That's entertaining But that's a good example Of what I'm talking about There are enough

Character scenes with good actors That kind of work enough That the cool ass crazy action and, yeah, he holds it all together. Let the bodies hit the floor. And your edgy ass soundtrack. They're all floating and stuff. It's stupid, but cool.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely, for sure. And this does not approach any of that enjoyability whatsoever. He still has a one-five with the two Jamie Chung's. That's kind of neat, I guess. I did it better in the one. It did it better at the one. And there were even more people to deal with it. Like, it would be harder to do it.

do and I think the one that was what 2001 like I feel like that was before this movie it was like right after Matrix that movie yeah yeah yeah it's weird it's like because yeah I don't have a great frame of reference for all of Dragon Ball Z and so I'm not sitting here thinking to myself like man I've they what an insult to the show it's just a bad movie yeah like yeah I'm the kind of viewer where it's like yeah there are characters I know the names of who didn't show there's no krillin there's no you know for Vigita or freezer or any of those things, but it's one of those where I do feel like

as much as they have the Kamehameha, they do like the bare minimum of the requisite stuff. It does feel like they didn't even really go out of their way. Like the collecting the Dragon Balls, even though that is the plot, like feels so kind of backseat and

I feel like you could have had a couple actual like friggin' power blast. This feels kind of like the Mortal Kombat. Oh yeah, he wrote, he wrote Final Destination. That's a good one. See there you go I like his work on I see him a lot of American horror story I like his work on American horror story quite a bit It's weird. Yeah, it's like this is pretty small for what I like Seems like he's a better collaborator perhaps

Than like a full-on a tour. It's like going here like this got me like a lot of great thing like I don't know I mean this this dude also has a A direct a final destination to yeah, and And three, yeah. Didn't he do Megan is Missing? Because that's a movie I think he wrote and directed, which is like, no? Don't see it on here. Megan is missing? I'm pretty sure.

It was the same guy who works on American Horror Story, and I believe he is an Asian man. Is it called Megan Is Missing? I'm pretty sure it's Megan Is Missing? Because that is, either way, that is like a, you know, famously really bad movie with like a lot of intent behind it um so you know like i guess is michael goy okay never mind racist i am a racist racist racist racist proof hey do you want to play goku i have been training my entire life to be able to play goku um michael go i see way you got confused michael goys also worked on american there we go okay yeah all right so not as bad as that then but

But yeah, I mean, this doesn't speak to the level of work I've seen James Wong be able to handle. But, but yeah, it's like it doesn't even have enough of like the surface. It doesn't utilize the surface level of Dragon Ball Z stuff enough to. No, there's no panache. Yeah, there's no zest. Yeah, it's like. It's flat. It's flat.

And there are moments where part of me was like, I, I can't tell if it's even intentional. But there are times where it feels like the movie is trying to behave like anime. and you know there are the delivery definitely the delivery and there are a couple of moments like in the way that it attempted to handle humor especially like when they're meeting chow yon fat and things like that i was like for moments when you squint you're like okay this does feel like it has this oh and in the classroom that was what made me think of it where the background melts the way and she's in the field and you know he's like fantasizing about her and i'm like okay this seems like one small instance in this movie that feels like a direct choice that's trying to get somewhere maybe a little interesting because even you know back when this was made it was less even prominent than it is now to recreate that style live action yeah see the high school stuff was more entertaining yeah and then it feels like once it got to the actual attempting to be Dragon Ball Z stuff it got less anime like as it went well I it doesn't even

anime like is such a broad term it doesn't feel like it's trying to be the anime style that Dragon Ball was. Yeah. If anything, they're just kind of going for like generic anime. Generic, yeah, just anime. Choices that might make you think of an anime, you know. Yeah. And it's kind of like Mortal Kombat in that way too,

where like all of the new Mortal Kombat movie has better fights and at least is better constructed overall. And has entertaining gore. Yeah, there is entertainment value to be had. There's at least one fun character to watch, maybe even a couple. But that movie has that thing where you feel like by the end

you kind of didn't see Mortal Kombat like you did but it's all building up to you know maybe next time we'll do the tournament and this kind of felt like that too where it's like yeah you get the Dragon Balls together and he makes a wish and all that but it really feels like you know the real

heft of what these battles are and then the conflicts of this world we'll do that next time Super Sayans and all that shit we'll get into that later like he didn't even get blonde hair no yeah this i mean one expectation i wasn't even sure of what the journey was that goku was going on like what he had to grow into why he had the suit and had to learn the kame i i think he i mean usually it's like a character has to have some type of physical journey

that but really it's about who they will change into by the end of the movie and i'm like This guy's, like, seem to have, like, a real lack of faith in himself. Because they keep saying, like, believe in yourself. Goku, and I'm like, I don't really get much inner conflict from you of a guy. You seem, like, pretty confident. Like, you know, anytime you have a pickle, ha, anytime you have a pickle to get out of, you seem like you get out of. They're pretty fast.

Like, you handle the situations really fast. You're neither over nor underconfident. And, like, at the high school party, when you let all those dudes beat themselves up and you're like head sliding across the car. It seems like you believe enough when the time calls for it. Like they're looking for the Dragon Ball. I don't know. It was just terrible.

Like, I could give two shits about the main character. And it was just so, this whole thing felt like just, like it was dragging its feet. Dragon its feet. Ha, ha, ha, ha. This was my pickle one, but yeah. It's okay. Let me have this. It's just dragging its feet through the whole thing.

So, yeah, I don't know. Well, he's training through the whole movie. I guess that's his arc. His eventually... What does he train into? A guy who can do the copy-a-me-off? Yeah, him being upside down in the truck bed and him moving the orange and all that other shit.

You're not good enough. It wasn't even like really building up to that. I wasn't even sure why we just kept cutting back to some of this mundane tasks for Goku's personal life. I'm just like, just find the Dragon Balls. get this over with. I mean, yeah. There's so many places where this could have gone wrong and part of me doesn't, I don't want to put a blame on any particular place because this whole movie could have been better. But I was also like, man, it doesn't seem as though this guy did much at home. I feel like

you could bridge some of these gaps with a little homework. Yeah. A little pathos, you know, with a little. Maybe he's like, I didn't want it to influence too much of my style. I'm like, what's style? What do you mean? This is like some terrible TV power ranger. shit. This is not good. And not charming like Power Rangers either. No. No fun. Look, guys, we're ending this. We're done. I want to talk about this movie anymore.

I'm talking about it. I'm tired of talking about it. Yeah. Yeah, this is the first movie reaction where I had only like a tiny positive thing to say and frankly half of why I think she's good is because

I also find her just incredibly attractive you know so that's that's one factors in for my viewing experience which she's also like no I would say even more than that

she's actually like the one of the only actors in this movie that seems to strike a charming tone yeah she's the only one who does where everyone else is just so boring or weird and even Shying Fats kind of annoying

yeah and And yeah, she actually kind of coalesces. She doesn't look like she's in a costume. Like obviously in costume and wig. The writing is shit, but she brings a lot of like natural, sincere charm. She seemed to have the right. The right something or another. Right pitch for this.

Yeah. Yeah. She wasn't like trying to be heavy. And she wasn't. Nor was she mocking the material. Yeah. Yeah. It was just right.

She did good. Way to go, Jamie Chung. This is your standout performance. Jamie Chung! MVP of the movie, Jamie Chung. Did it. You're great indexed her too. Right?

Let me make sure I'm not racist. Yeah. Get, we each get one. Oh, no, it's not her. No, I do think it is her. But I can't remember if Jamie Chung is the one who played, um, oh, maybe. No, it is her cool.

Thank Christ. Damn. Yes. I remember her in Gotham, she was great, absolutely beautiful. Still, still good looking at that show. It's okay, I'm sure one of the choices made during this movie was, hey, Jamie Chung, very appealing, very attractive, and hey, that choice is evident in the movie. So, hey, that's another thing's movie did all right. She's been around for ages, Jamie Chum. She's been around with, like, seen her so many things.

And who's the one in fucking, she's in the second bunch? It's one of the movies who I watch. Dude, let's watch Zach Snyder, Zach Snyder's sucker punch by Zach Snyder. Who's the girl in Black Lightning? Oh, um, oh, Shantal Thuie? Yes. Damn, good pull, John. Thanks. Yeah.

I learned her name for me. That's right, she temporarily followed us. Mm-hmm. And then she had pulled. That three-month window expires, she's like, I'm out. They're not covering black. Like, black, like. I can't follow you guys now.

You gotta keep it within the family. Now, let's do a Patreon. Mark Leach, I am just discovering that you are back on our Patreon page, Mark. Welcome. It's good to have you back. Shout out this white guy for this white guy movie. Because you know what, man? This is a boring movie, but you, you're not boring at all, Mark.

You're the real Goku. You have a big heart and soul, man. All the messages we used to exchange with each other. Two paragraphs of those messages are more exciting than 90 minutes of this movie. I want everyone to know that. It's all because of the insane words of wisdom, Mark Leach always has to offer our way. It's great to have you, but I want you to leach on to my heart. Fill me with love.

Fill me up. Mark his words. Be in my buttercup, Mark Leach. Oh, yeah. Hmm. Hmm. Mark. Leach, and be my buttercup.

Leach, you and me, I beseech thee. Touch me. Stop showing off. You're starting to reach here. Ah, hey. Hey, you subverted my expectations. Yeah, boom. It's good, man. Boom, screech. Breach.

All right, we're way done. Stacey Keech. Thanks for being here, dude. Love you. I hope you enjoyed Multiverse of Madness. Well, hey, it's better than this movie. Good to have you back, Mark. I love you more than anyone in your actual surroundings loves you.

I want you to know that I'll betray you in a heartbeat. Me, I'm the only friend you got out there, Mark. So watch your back, Mark. Watch your back, man. Can't even trust me. It's only him. Only me, man. I'm telling you I can't trust those people, man.