The Resilient Mind - How to Achieve Mental Calmness - Michael Singer

Episode Date: May 25, 2023

Join us for an enlightening episode as we welcome Michael A. Singer, acclaimed author of the highly influential book "The Untethered Soul," which reached the coveted #1 spot on the New York Times bestseller list. Not only did Singer achieve remarkable success with "The Untethered Soul," but his subsequent works, "The Surrender Experiment" and "Living Untethered," also became New York Times bestsellers, captivating readers worldwide.Take action and strengthen your mind with The Resilient Mind Journal. Get your free digital copy today: ⁠⁠⁠⁠Download Now⁠⁠Source: Sound True Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Resilient Mind podcast. In this episode, you will be listening to How to Achieve Mental Calmness with Michael Singer. Get access to the Mental Mastery Program and other exclusive episodes by becoming a subscriber. Enjoy. The spiritual life is really life itself. To separate your life into my worldly life and my spiritual life is not understand what's going on. They're all the same, they're both the same. They're additive to each other.

There's nothing to be left out, depending upon how you work with yourself inside. If you don't work with yourself inside, then very, very few people work with themselves inside. Then what is going on inside is just what's going on inside. If it's a mess inside, it's a mess inside. It's nice inside, it's nice inside. People don't understand it's your responsibility.

It is your responsibility. just like it's responsible to keep your house clean, it's responsibility to make your bed. It is your responsibility to take care of your inner environment. If you don't take care of your outer environment, bugs and things will crawl in and become a mess. If you don't throw your food away, if you don't clean up the house, it's going to be a mess.

It's the exact same thing inside. The default of your inside, if you do nothing about it, is the lowest possible state. Energy falls down to its lowest possible state, which is depression. which it just goes to where you're just not doing okay inside. You don't feel well, you don't feel enthused, you don't feel love, you don't feel passion,

you're just not doing well inside. That's because you didn't work with yourself. It really is the same. If you don't drive your car, you're going to get an accident. If you just take your hand off the wheel and don't pay attention to what's going on and just let it go over where it goes, you'll be in bad shape.

It's the same thing inside. thing inside. You live inside. You don't live outside. You live inside. There's a mind in there with you. There's a heart in there with you. There's energy flows in there with you. If you leave them alone, it's going to be a mess. People don't even understand what a mess it is because they don't know it doesn't have to be that way. You just get used to living in a mess. You're moody. You have problems. You're sensitive. You don't like things. You don't get what you want. You get what you don't want. You're afraid, you're desirous. It's just a commotion. It's just uncomfortable inside. Most people are always uncomfortable inside. Very rarely are they comfortable. So what this drives you to do,

if you're not paying attention, and I'm telling you people are not, it's a mess inside. It's uncomfortable inside. It's disturbing inside. Nobody wants to live like that. So instead of straightening it up inside, what will happen, and it will happen to everybody, all seven billion of is you will realize that certain things can happen outside that make it worse inside. People can say things that disturb you. People who you love can leave you. You can get old and not be as good looking

as you used to be. It wrinkles in your face and so on. All kinds of things can go on and will go on that cause disturbance inside. Sometimes things will happen outside that make you feel good inside, but it's not as much. There are way more things that cause disturbance,

that cause discomfort. that cause fears, then there are things that actually make you feel well. I'm not talking about maybe if I get this I'll feel well. The actual moment of I feel whole, I feel complete, I wouldn't change a single thing, everything's beautiful. You must admit, you can count it on your fingers on one hand, versus the things that bother you. There aren't enough stars in the sky. You're always getting disturbed by something.

That is because it's disturbed inside. If it is disturbed inside, then events that unfold outside and come into you are going to stir up the disturbances. All of us have different disturbances, therefore different things disturb us, turn us on or off. So a normal life, which you don't want, the normal life of a human being on this planet is as follows. I am not okay inside. I'm not comfortable. I'm not comfortable. I have found that certain things can happen outside that may me feel more comfortable.

and I can find that there are other things happen outside that made me feel really worse. So my task in life is to try to control the environment outside of me so that more often it makes me feel good inside when it comes in and less often it unfolds in a way that disturbs me, it makes me worse. If you dare to be open and look at it, you will realize that's most people's entire life, trying to figure out what they need or want outside

and what they don't want and don't need outside, and then try to figure how to make it be that way. And we end up going to war with reality. We end up going outside, fighting with people, places, things, situations, everything unfolding because it's not the way we want. And then you try to make it be the way you want. And by the time you're done, it's very difficult to make everybody be the way you want. It's very difficult to every situation unfold the way you want.

It's very difficult to have things not happen that disturb you since it's so easy for us to get disturbed. So it doesn't work. And we end up getting frustrated. We end up getting tense. We end up getting anxious. This is the normal state of how people live. That's a worldly life. It's just an external life of fighting with the outside

to try to make it so you can live with yourself inside. There is an alternative life. It's so simple, it's ridiculous. And very, very few people actually walk it, which is, I live in here. I should straighten it up. I shouldn't try to find somebody that will straighten up for me.

I shouldn't try to find a job that will turn me on so much that I will be distracted by the disturbances inside of me. I should fix what's wrong inside of me. This is my house. I live in here. If I'm sensitive, if I'm scared,

if I'm insecure, if I have issues going on in here that I don't like to talk about that cause me trouble, I need to clean up. I need to straighten up. this up in here. I don't want to go for the rest of my life, keeping garbage inside of me, and then trying to make a life outside that either distracts me from it or fits what's wrong

inside of me. Somebody talks to me exactly what I want to be talked to. They give me space when I need space. They feel close to me and say loving things when I need to. And so this makes me more comfortable inside because of the way this person is behaving outside. Have you ever met anyone succeeded at that? You can't sit there and control and manipulate people and then think they're going to love you and think it's going to work out. There's never a situation that will never work. What does work is to once and for all sit yourself down and say, I'm a mess.

I'm sensitive. I got things that have to be exactly the way I want them to be for me to be okay. Otherwise, I get weird inside. I don't want to be like that. That's what you say. I don't want to be like that. I want to be able to be okay inside as a starting position so that when I come outside,

it's because I want to share the love that I feel. I want to share the passion that I feel. I want to feel the creativity that I feel. I want to share the inspiration that I feel. I want to bring something into the world in front of me, not always be taking something because I'm not okay. I am telling you someday, if you grow in this path, you will find out that need is not

natural. There are no needs. I mean, you need to feed your body or something basic like that, but in terms of social or psychological needs, no, it's because you're disturbed inside that you need all these things outside. It's like if you get real sick and you make your body real sick, you need a doctor. You shouldn't need a doctor. If your body's healthy, you don't need a doctor, do you? If your mind is healthy, if you are healthy inside, you don't have needs. It doesn't mean of relationships. It doesn't mean you don't go to work, but you don't do it out of need. You do it out of love. You do it out of joy. You do it out of expressing the beauty and passion that you filled inside of yourself. Then life is beautiful for you and everyone around you

because you don't have to manipulate them and control them and complain about how they are. So the whole spiritual path, and I haven't talked about a single technique yet, the whole spiritual path is about waking up and realizing, I have a mess in here. And I'm expecting the world to unfold in a way that makes my mess more tolerable. Okay? The driver in front of me better drive at the speed I wanted to drive her. I'm getting upset called road rage. The light better not change. I'm in a rush. It better not rain. I want to go camping. He better not talk to her for more than three seconds because I get jealous. It's like every single thing is predicated upon the fact that I am not okay inside,

therefore you guys get your act together. Or you'll be sorry. It's cute. There is a way for you to be okay inside. I guarantee you, everyone. There is a way to be okay inside. It is not true that's just because it's been a mess, that it has to stay a mess.

If you let your house become a mess, there's pizza boxes all over the place and bugs, it doesn't have to stay that way. The minute you decide you don't want it that way anymore, guess what? You do the work that's necessary to clean it up, and then it's just the same as it was never that way. Okay, it's exactly the same inside. So now we get down to what does one do to clean it up inside,

and why haven't I been doing it? The basics of it are always the same. You have stored inside of you things that bothers you from the past, and you know you have. whenever something uncomfortable happens, you're not comfortable with it. And so you don't want it to really someday, when you meditate deep enough,

you realize what you don't want is for this uncomfortable vibration that came into you. You don't want it to touch you. It's almost natural in a sense. I don't want something that's uncomfortable to me to get too close to me. Outside, you don't want it to get too close to you.

You try to avoid it, you stay away from it. You do the same thing when it comes inside. When a vibration comes in that is uncomfortable to you. You don't want it to come all the way back in your face. You don't want it to actually come all the way in. When a vibration comes in that is comfortable to you, an intimate loving situation, beautiful sunset,

something's happening that you're very receptive to, you're very open, then you do want it to come in, don't you? Nothing can get close enough. You want it to come all the way in and touch your whole being. That shows you what's going on so that when things come in that are not comfortable, you push them away. You try to push them away.

When things that come in that are ultra-comfortable, you try to hold them, you try to let them come all the way back so you can keep them, all right? That's very beautiful. Except if you push away something that already happened, where do you think it goes? Does it make the thing not have happened?

No, it does, it does it, period, ever. It means it stays inside of you. You actually store it inside. of yourself. So now this uncomfortable thing that was already uncomfortable when it happened, okay, somebody's yelling at you, somebody fires you, your house burned down, you know, somebody died. There are things that happen. No question about it. There are things that happen that when they come inside are not comfortable. You know about that yet? Okay, it's reality. Don't think being spiritual means that doesn't happen. Don't you dare think that. What spiritual means is when it happens,

It comes in. It's not fun. It's a discomfort. And you experience it fully. You let it come all the way back in, learn from it, grow from it, experience it. And someday someone you love will die. Your parents will die. Something will happen.

It will happen. Once it happens, it already happened. There's no reason to say, I don't want it to have happened. That's what are you living in a fairyland? It happened. So the question is, what are you going to do with it? What most people do with it, in a sense, sends is refused to let it have happened. They say no, no. I wasn't finished with my relationship

with my mother. I wanted to live longer and or whatever the heck it is. It's called denial. It's not a psychological level, but it is a spiritual level of denial. You're denying the reality of what took place. Why? Because it's uncomfortable. Well, I can't deny that it happened and I can't deny that it's uncomfortable. So I'm left only one choice. Honor, it's right to be, learn from the experience of what it's like to go through an experience like this, become a greater person because I went through this experience,

I learned from it, I grew, I learned. Doesn't mean it's comfortable. You're trying to make it be comfortable. You're in there learning from the discomfort. You're working out, he starts to hurt, your coach pushes you. You're not mean. He just knows it the way the muscles work

is unless you get to the point where it's starting to give off. It gives off. lactic acid so it feels yucky and they tell you if you push it not too much but if you push it past that point the muscle gets stronger and that's why they say no pain no gain it's the exact same thing inside if you had your way you would never grow you would build a little life that's in a box and every single thing in it is exactly the way you're already comfortable your boundaries your limits your sense of what you want and you go cap in there and lock it up and never go anywhere

you would never grow. There's no growth there. Growth is when events unfold that are not comfortable to you. It comes in. It is uncomfortable, but you learn how to be comfortable with uncomfortable. You learn to understand that what discomfort means is, I can't vibrate at that level. My soul, my being, my consciousness is not evolved enough yet to be comfortable with this vibration. So what you do instead is you learn to say events are going to unfold, they're going to come into me. I'm going to feel their vibration. Some of them are comfortable. Some of them are not comfortable.

That's fine with me. I honor that. I honor reality. I honor the right to learn from different experiences that unfold. What do I do about the fact that's uncomfortable? You don't have a choice of undoing the event. if event has come in to you, it has already happened. There's no undoing it.

It has to happen out here, then it goes into your senses, doesn't it? You pick it up secondhand. If it has already happened, no one has ever undone what already happened. So that's not a choice. You can't undo the event. So now the event, it comes in, it's uncomfortable. Well, things are uncomfortable. I don't know.

You can try to make it comfortable if you want. Oh, boy, my mother died. You can do that if you want, but the problem I can work too good. So what you do is you honor, gee, my mother's only going to die once, and I was very close to her. It hurts a lot. Isn't that beautiful? The pain says, to me, that pain says, I love you.

I don't feel that pain for something I don't know. So the pain that you feel at somebody's death is love. It's a way of expressing your love. So you learn to find a way to be open and receptive to the reality of life that is coming into you. Because you can't undo it, and sometimes it is uncomfortable. Its vibration is not always pleasant. And you realize I would like to learn to be comfortable with all vibrations in life. I'd like to learn to be comfortable with reality, with the whole.

This is called working on yourself. So instead of fighting with everybody and fighting with life and getting weird because things happen, you learn to honor, accept, and respect reality. and you learn how to expand yourself. It's really an expanding of your being so that what has happened can fit inside of you. Since we didn't do that in the past, very few people do that.

Don't feel bad. The natural tendency is to push it away. I don't want to experience this. So therefore, you didn't let it come through. You stored it inside, and you have this entire collection of stored things from the past that bothered you. That collection is going to ruin your life.

It's just that simple. That's the junk, that's the pizza boxes that you're left inside because you never cleaned up as you went through your life. You didn't finish. They didn't finish. They're stuck inside of you. Now to do it very briefly, anything you have stuck inside of you is going to drive you crazy. Someone's going to say something.

You'll feel weird. You'll see a billboard that will remind you of it. Then you'll be afraid of seeing a billboard. Or you'll be afraid of seeing this person again because they always push your buttons. you're filled with this stuff and now you have to adjust your life so that it doesn't disturb you and at some point you collect enough stuff and you in a sense abstractly relate everything to it at first it was i had trouble with with george he was a bad relationship i hadn't no so i don't want to have like a relationship then you had a trouble with somebody else and always say well i just

don't like men at that age we just don't get along well right then you have another one sit there and say I don't like men that are cowboys or firemen or this or that. You keep voting it out and eventually I don't like men at all. People get like that. It's just you have no more room left in you where an event can take place that doesn't hit your stuff. Do you understand that? Please understand that. You don't want to be like that.

You can't have a nice life if your insides is that messed up and then you try to control the life around you so it doesn't hit your stuff. So the alternative is to say, I don't want that stuff inside of me. What stuff? Any of it? I don't want any of it inside of me. I want to be open. I want to be receptive. I want to be able to handle the reality that is unfolding in front of me and finish it off.

I told you, I maintain a rule. I'm very strict about it. I'm not always successful. But I maintain a rule. If it's not happening outside, it's not happening inside. I give them the room. If something's happening outside and it's a disservice. Okay, you know, that's tough, it's hard.

But when it's no longer happening outside, there ain't no way I'm letting that go on inside. Otherwise, it'll never go away. If somebody's yelling at you, it's not comfortable, it's not comfortable, right? Then they stop yelling. Don't worry, they won't stay there yelling, nobody ever has. And then they walk away. I don't want that disturbance still inside of me.

It'll never go away. I've got scars inside of me because somebody yell at me. No, if it's not going on outside, it ain't going on inside. I'm going to let the energy pass through. I'm going to give it the right. room to finish so I don't have to carry it with me. That is the essence of spirituality. That is the essence of yoga. That is the essence of every single thing that has anything to do with spiritual growth. You cannot have that stuff inside of you. The highest technique you can do is to let go of your

stuff is to basically sit there and say, I don't want this stuff inside of me. I don't care what it costs. I spend my money on lots of things. You do too. Nothing buys. what that's worth. In fact, the reason you spend your money in a new car or a boat or a vacation is he's just so disturbed inside. You need a vacation from yourself. I need a vacation from this junk that comes up inside of me. And I'm telling you, that's where you spend all your money. That's why you need a nicer house. You need a nicer house because the Jones has to have a nice house than you makes you feel insecure because you don't feel good about yourself. And now you have to go out and get a nicer house. And so everything you're spending your money on, you're better off.

This is a better way to spend your money. If you're going to have some pain, some discomfort and having to do some work, get paid properly. And what gets paid properly is I want less of me. I want less stuff inside. I want less stuff inside. How would you like to be able to wake up in the morning and giggle without a single thought on your mind? Not one single just like, I'm back. I wonder what's going to happen today and be all excited to find out what's going to happen today. To have any no notion, concept, view, opinion, preference, just like, wow, it's Christmas morning. There are going to be events that unfold in front of me during the day. I wonder what they will be. and just have the blast of your life.

And if something happens that's challenging, then play chess. Be challenged. People put themselves, wait a minute. Sometimes people come and I say, if you don't understand, so challenging. Chess champions put themselves in these amazingly challenging situations, don't they?

Mountain climbers. Oh, my God. That's pretty challenging and life-defying. There are people that go out of their way to purposely put themselves in very challenging situations. Why? Why did they do that? Because it brings out the best in you. It makes you dig deep and bring out the best that you are and makes you better than you were before, doesn't it? That's why we have competitions. That's why you climb mountains. That's why you challenge yourself to your limits. Why can't you let the everyday events that are unfolding in your life be your mountain climbing, be your chess match? They are just there. If they're challenging, good. Good. I'm glad they're challenging. That's exciting. It's better than being bored, isn't it?

It's better than just floating through empty, dark space. And so you get to the point where you realize, I have made a mess inside, and I am going to clean up the mess I made inside so that I can enjoy the rest of my life, not enjoy it conditionally. It doesn't have to be a certain way for me to enjoy it. I enjoy it.

What? Life. I enjoy the moments that are unfolding in front of me. They're challenging, there's exciting. There's... I don't know. don't need dreams. I don't need to dream about someday it'll be the way I want. People make a big deal out of dreams as if they're spiritual. Dreams are not spiritual.

I'll talk about your inner dreams. I'm talking about this notion that someday my ship will come in. All you're doing is saying I'm not okay, but maybe someday I will be. I don't want you to say someday I will be. I want you to be okay right now, right where you are. The Buddha say, bloom where you are. I want you just to sit there and say, I, I don't want you to say, I can make something beautiful out of every moment of my life if I'm beautiful inside. But if I'm problemed inside, I can make a mess out of every single moment of my life. I can get tense. I can get anxious. I can get scared, insecure, can't I? I'm good at it. And I'm telling us, now we have the groundwork. The groundwork is you have this stuff stored inside of you. You do not

want it in there. That's your main technique. I haven't given you a technique yet. That's your main technique. I don't want that stuff inside of me. I used to say it and I say it again, but my friends yell at me when I say it. If there was a 50 gallon vat, an oil drum filled with roaches and snakes, and I had a choice or you have a choice of having this stuff inside of me or having somebody shoved me inside that bin, you better pick going into the bin because it's much more comfortable because at least the bin is outside of you. Do you understand that? Being in there with the maniac who's not happy about anything,

who's given my preferences, don't like it, they got all these scars from before. You understand that? That is not fun. And so you make this phenomenal commitment. It's a very personal commitment. It has nothing to do with your wife or husband or boyfriend or girlfriend or children, anything.

It has to do with you. This is your life. You are given the time between, your birth and your death. That's a gift that was given to you, wasn't it? You're here. You don't know where you came from. You don't know where you're going. But you know you have this time between your birth and your death. Do you really want to live it, scared to death? You really want to live it that I'm so screwed up inside that maybe I can manipulate and control the world around me so it doesn't bother me too much? Or maybe I can find somebody that makes it tolerable? No. And so

you take arms against it. You sit there and say, I am not going to leave this stuff inside of me. is my life. It's my job. It's not somebody else's job. I put it in there. I'll let it go. And so now you live this great life. It doesn't sound like a spiritual life, but it's the ultimate of a spiritual life. You make a vow and you remember it every morning and every evening. First, I am not putting any more in here. If an event takes place in my life, now that I'm conscious enough and I woke up, if an event unfolds in my life and it is uncomfortable to me, I am going to make sure that I let it go. That's as simple as that.

How you do it, those are what you mean by techniques. But underneath, there has to be that commitment. It will not stay inside of me. You say that about all kinds of things. You love somebody. You go to great ends to get them, don't you? You want to go on a vacation? Oh, my God, you'll work overtime.

You do all kinds of stuff. What do you gain a week? And then you're back to your same place. Do something that works, that lasts. Do not build this stuff inside of you. So you start, and they don't start with those stuff you already built in there. That's too hard.

You start with the new stuff that's happening. And you sit there and say, I can handle that it rained when I wanted to go camping. I can handle the person's driving slowly in front of me when I'm a rush. I can handle the fact that I wanted to wear a certain outfit. But Sally said she was going to wear her to the party and heck I'm wearing the same thing as her.

All right? So, okay, can you handle these big, amazing traumatic things. You're going to your senior prom in high school and this little, little zits or something shows up on your face, right? Comes to visit you. Have a little imperfection. Can you handle it? You're sitting on a planet, spin around a little nowhere's, and this little tiny 16th of an inch thing changes, and you're weird. You have to sit there and say, I can handle it. Why? Because the alternative is to say, I can't handle it. And if you can't handle it, it's going to ruin your life, you'll be weird for the rest of your life because that happened in high

school. Don't tolerate this. So it's something you do inside yourself where you say, I am going to find a way to let things pass through me. They may be uncomfortable with they're happening, but I'm not going to keep them inside of me. That's the first commitment you say to yourself. How do you do that? People say, I don't know how to do that. I agree you don't know how to do that. If you knew how to do it, you would already done it. So there's this word in English, language called learn. You didn't know how to do calculus when you first went to school. You didn't know how to play tennis first time he fits up a racket. You know how to play the piano first time he sat down, did you? But you didn't say, no, I can't play the piano. I don't know

how. You knew you were there to learn. You need to learn how to do this. And don't say, no, I'm not capable of doing this. Yes, you are. You are capable of doing it. You would not have made it to the human race if you were not. That's one of the perks of having taken in human birth, you're capable of doing this. It's like, if I walk into your house and there's pizza box all over the place and all kinds of junk going on, no, I don't know how to clean it up. Yes, you do. You're not going to convince me.

You do not how to clean that up. It's just you don't want to. It's the same thing here. You do know how it is instinctual and natural to you. I'll prove it to you. If an event takes place outside, a person is driving in front of you. It's the one I use everyone likes that one, driving 10 miles an hour slower than the speed limit in front of you and you're in a rush. How are you doing? The answer better be fine. Why? Otherwise,

you're not doing fine. Otherwise, you just ruined your day because somebody's driving slow in front of you. How did that help? Did it make her drive faster? No. Did it make him take a left and get out of no, it didn't do a single thing. It's what we call the irrational. What is irrational? If you do a cost-benefit analysis and there's 100% cost and zero-percent benefit and you do it anyways, What is the benefit of you not being able to handle what is actually happening in front of you, such as somebody driving slow in the speed limit? Right? Now, I told you, if there's room to pass, pass.

I'm not telling you to sit there and be a masochist, but if there is no room to pass and you're going to be driving on this for a little while, I am highly encouraging you to enjoy it. Why? Because the alternative is to make a mess out of your life for absolutely no gain. This is what I meant when I started, when I said, you don't know what it's like to live in there and drive the car. It's a clean up. It is of no benefit. It's bad enough that the person is driving 10 miles an hour at low speed limit. It's worth that you're bothering yourself about it. These things are not related. They're different events, aren't they? They're completely independent events.

Something's happening outside. The fact that you're bothering yourself about an inside is something you're doing. Well, I highly advise to stop doing it. And that's why when I say to you, you are capable of doing it. People say, I'm not capable. I say learn. I don't understand. No. You know how I know you're capable? Because you're the one who's doing it. It's like it may be if I told you pick up Mount Everest, but if I say to you, right now, you're about to put your hand on a hot stove, okay?

Don't do it. There's no way you're not capable of not doing it because you're the one who's doing it. You're about to do it. Just don't. Just withhold the urge to do it. And then it will be done. It'll be over.

It's the exact same thing with the person driving in front of you. It's a person driving in front of you. That is not disturbing. It's just somebody driving in front of you. You have to go out of your way to make you be disturbing. You have to start saying, what's wrong with you? You'll be driving the right lane. It's something you're doing.

Just don't do it. Don't do it. And so here's the techniques come in. At that moment, when you see this tendency, it's just a habit-formed tendency, to create trouble for yourself. I don't want you to create trouble for yourself. This is not about getting to know God. This is not about some spiritual journey.

This is not about awakening of Kundalini, although all of that will happen naturally, all right? This is so funny. This is about why do you want to ruin your life? Bad enough, somebody else ruins it. Why do you want to ruin your life? Why do you want to go out of your way to make yourself uncomfortable? It doesn't make sense, does it? Then don't do that.

Now, there are techniques. For example, there's affirmation. But what do you mean? I'm sitting there, I'm driving, and I notice, I'm in here, I notice my mind is about to get negative, about the way the person is driving in front of me. Very good. So what I do is before it can start, I take over the mind.

You can use your mind. Make a count to 10 right now inside. They do it? See, you're the boss. The problem is you're not using your mind. And when you don't use it, it uses itself, doesn't it? You're not telling it to get upset about the driver in front of you. It's doing that out of habit.

So what you do is when it starts to do it, You use this affirmation sounds like, oh my God, do I love the way this person is driving. I literally have taught my mind to say, hey, I want to drive the way I want to drive. Then they get to drive the way they want to drive. I don't want anybody taking away how I drive. I don't want to take away how they drive. So you just start using your mind to say something constructive, to say something more positive. So that then when you're doing that, it can't be doing the other thing.

It doesn't do both at once. When you're using your mind, it can't be spewing this negative stuff. It's only when you stop driving in there. If your hands on the wheel, your car's going to go where you're putting it. Take your hand off the wheel. Who knows where it's going? That's what this is like inside. So affirmation is one way.

Another way is if you meditate, you're a meditator, and you learn to follow your breath, which is a very, very good time to meditate, this is a good time to do it. So if you're not going to do affirmation, you're driving, so you're going slower than you're normally what you do. So you usually go 15 miles over the speed limit. This person's 10 miles under the speed limit. So therefore, we got all this time while you're driving so nice and slowly and safely, follow your breath. Just start watching your breath. Instead of wasting your time doing something destructive, do something constructive. You tell me, who's stopping you from doing that? Nobody. That's what's so funny. There's nobody in there, but you do whatever you want in there.

and don't think this doesn't matter. This is going to change your life. Now, by the time the person turns off, if you even notice, because you were enjoying the experience as it was, they turn off, you've had a nice time. You're in a good mood. You're ready to go to work. The other way, you're already went to work.

You're burned out before you get there. And then when you get there, what you do is tell everybody how terrible the driver in front of you was what a terrible experience that was. Then you come home and tell it to your husband or wife, Oh, my God. Which is better? I'm asking you, I'm begging you

to do a rational cost-benefit analysis about how you are living inside yourself. Don't call it spiritual. Call it rational. It's just a rational thing to do. You do it with the food. You look at your food before you eat it and you see if it's going to make you sick.

You may like it, so you eat a little bit, but you do make rational decisions. You don't make any rational decisions about your thoughts. 99.9% of human beings walk this earth, make no rational decision about the thoughts. They just let them be where they are. They like somebody. So I like it. Okay, I like it. We didn't even know where that came from. Where did that thought come from? And so you start working with yourself. I call this working with yourself. It's a beautiful thing to do. You do it every moment of your life, especially when things

are disturbing you. It's not about the big things. It's about the little things. Because we end up being disturbed all the time by a mosquito. It's too hot out. It's raining like I don't want it to be. This, that, all kinds of stuff. And so instead, you start working to train yourself to be more happy, to be more positive, to be able to handle the events that are taking place in life. If you will let these things pass through you, they will pass through you. I say this all the time, but I mean it. There is no super glue in there. If stuff is stuck inside of you, you did it. Listen to me, there's nothing inside. It's just empty. It's just energy. It's just pure energy. It's just pure energy. So if an event comes in, it passes right through. You learn from it, you experience it,

you become a greater being because you experienced it, but it will not stay in there. I assure you, I've done this journey for 45 years, I've watched it very carefully. Nothing will stay in there. Nothing. No matter how bad it is, no matter how disturbing it is, this stuff's going to come in. You don't stand in front of it. You don't try to stop it. You don't try to control it or rationalize it or do anything, you just let it go. Let it go. Let it blow across your face like wind. And eventually it's like, oh, this is exciting. You can have as much fun as you want with life. So that's a second technique. A second technique is the first one is try to be positive, work with affirmation, work with positive thinking. That's fine. All right. Your second, one step deeper is just because

your mind is saying something doesn't mean you have to listen. Just because it's in there saying, Why are you driving like that? I don't like you should be driving the same. That's that, that, that, that, that, I got to get that way. Right? I don't have to listen to that. I can put my attention on my breath. Your consciousness is where you live.

If you put your attention on something other than the neurotic mind, you're going to find out it quiets down. If you don't listen to it, it will quiet down. Youhtra said an ignored guest quickly leaves. All right? So that's a second technique. The third technique,

which happens to be the highest, but you need to work your way to it, is to notice, there it goes again. There is the disturbed mind being disturbed. Relax. What do I mean? It won't relax. I didn't tell it to relax.

I told you to relax. You are in there noticing the mind being disturbed. How do you know the mind's disturbed? How do you know the mind's complaining about the person in front of you? Because I'm in here and I notice it. Relax back into where you notice from. Do you hear that? That's what it means to meditate on the self.

relax back to where you notice from, as opposed to relaxing into what you're noticing. That is the highest technique you will ever use. When you learn that no matter what's going on in front of you, you don't have to pay attention to it. You can just relax and release. At that point, what you've done is given plenty of room for it to pass through. You are the one who's in the way.

You're in the way. You take away the block that your will is created, that your resistance is creating it will pass right through take down the hoover dam and the caldera river will go exactly back to the way it was however longer they built the hoover dam get out of the way because you're the dam get out of the way do not resist relax and release that's the highest thing relax or release and the energies will pass right through you and they will not leave a single scar they'll they'll just be there when they're there and then they'll be gone when they're not all right So this is your technique.

I call it working with yourself because you are working with yourself. Instead of manipulating and controlling the world around you to try to make it fit your messed up self, you're letting go of yourself. And ultimately what will happen is a very natural process is as you let go of the everyday things that are happening now, the old stuff will start to come up. Why? Because you didn't shove new stuff down on top of it. It will release naturally.

It will come up in your sleep. It'll come up while you're just mind your own business. You were doing well, and all of a sudden there's stuff's coming up. Good. That is what is supposed to happen. It's called purification. If that stuff is in there, it's either going to stay down there and run your life from underneath, or are you going to be willing to let it go.

And you want it to come up, and you want to let it go. Now, now that sounds scary because you know there are things in there you just never see again. All right, that's why they've been shoved down there so far. Because you practiced with these everything. everyday things, the car in front of you, the fact that it rang, we didn't want it to, they seem like trivial things. They're not. They're just like, you know, when you learn to play the piano, they don't give you Beethoven? They give you scales. Oh, scales. Yes, but what do skills have to do with being able to play Beethoven? Everything. As you learn to play

your scales, you are getting the basics down about how to move your fingers, about timing, about all kinds of stuff. It is exactly the same with this. As you learn to play your scales, you're getting the basics down, about how to move your fingers, about timing, about all kinds of stuff. It is exactly the same with this. As you learn to let go that somebody didn't say hello or somebody didn't act the way you wanted them to or the car in front of it was a problem, when it rained we didn't want it to. Those are your scales. Oh, I turn to look at the scale. Nothing is small enough to not be worth letting go of. Not big enough, small enough. The slightest thing that happens, if you feel resistance, learn how to relax behind the resistance and let it go. Because you

learned your scales, now you can play some. So because you learn these basic techniques of relaxing and releasing and surrendering and letting go, now a bigger thing will come up. What do I do? The same thing. I don't know how to. Of course, you don't know how to. You haven't done it with

something bigger yet. You don't know how to play Beethoven just because you go with your scales, but now we're ready to try something. And so you'll flubble around a little bit, but you'll be able to do it because you've got the basics now. So when this thing comes up, do the same thing relax and release you welcome it that's the highest thing i can teach you you are to welcome the disturbances that come up inside of you why because the alternative is to keep them remember we started you don't want them in there you don't want them you want beauty in there you want love in there you want enthusiasm excitement passion inspiration don't you well you can't have it when you got

the other stuff in there it's already thanks full thanks full of poison so you have to be willing to let it go And so you change your attitude about stuff, all right? So what happens? It starts to come up. Your relax and release behind it. And a couple of big ones will come up and you'll get good at it. And that's all it takes because what will happen at some point you will let go enough to where not only is it not a negative that that stuff's in there, but all the energy you used to use to keep it down, to fight with it, to control the world so it didn't hit it is now liberated.

You literally freed that energy and it will start going up. And I'm telling you, it will go up. up and you will start to feel these waves of love, of joy, of shakti, of chi flowing up inside of you, literally flowing up is not a figurative statement. It is an upward rush, rushing through your being, and it lifts your heart. It lifts your heart like when you fell in love, for there's nobody there. There's just something inside of you, raising you, lifting you. You find yourself smiling all the time. So basically, your whole life changes. You will find that you get smarter than used to be. You can remember things better. You can do more calculations in your head. You will find

that you get inspired and have intuition, intuitive inspirations that happen. It's just your whole life changes because all that energy you were using to fight with the negative stuff, to keep the negative stuff and then fight with everything about it is liberated to be able to come up. And when it starts coming up, your whole life changes. All the chakras open, all the beauty of what you think of a spirituality that you try to make happen happens naturally. Literally, every single center of energy will open, you will feel it open, and you will feel how the energy flows through them until eventually all of it just flows up and fill you with joy and love and ecstasy while you're working while you're doing anything. Just like, hey, you can be depressed while you're working, can't you? You can get down while you're working.

You can be negative while you're working? Why can't you be positive while you're working? Why can it be a beautiful, positive experience? So this is what it means to walk the spiritual path. If meditation helps and it does meditate. If mantra helps and it does do mantra, if positive thinking helps and it does do positive thinking. Whatever technique, yoga, whatever it is,

find things that work for you to help you work with yourself. But the important thing is, do you understand that you don't want that stuff inside of you that you stored inside of you? And then try to compensate with it with the rest of your life. And you commit yourself every day to let go of a peace. Every day when you wake up in the morning, Before you do your practices, you remember what I said.

You sit there and say, there's going to be less of me when I go to bed tonight. I don't know how much less, but there will be less. I am not putting more in, and if some comes up, I'm letting it go. And if every night when you go to bed, you check it out, don't worry about what you did. Don't review everything and judge yourself. Just sit there and say, do I let some go. Did I do my best letting some of this stuff go? And then sleep well and get up and you get another day.

And every single day do that. And then you come back and you tell me what happens. Because I know people that meditate five hours a day, six hours a day for years and do not have the growth that takes place if you do this. You know what happens when you meditate? They say you did your practices. That's why they're called practice. They're preparing you for the real work, which is letting go for yourself.

Christ said what? You must die to be reborn. You will find that the essence of all spiritual teachings are what we just talked about. That's what it means to die to be reborn. you are willing to let go of your personal self so that you can rise up and ascend to the beauty that's inside of you. You work with these things.

Jigrative. Thank you for tuning into this episode. If you're enjoying the content, you can access exclusive material by becoming a subscriber. Continue strengthening your mind by listening to our other episodes.