The Rewatchables - ‘Along Came Polly’ With Bill Simmons and Sean Fennessey

Episode Date: May 7, 2024

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Late rated PG-13. All right, so it's May. This isn't going to be a theme month. It might be, maybe, but I was thinking about the concept of slow burner, Sean. I thought you were going to say sharding month. Short month? Short month is a great idea.

Are there other movies with sharts? It's like where you almost, it was almost a mess, but then we saved it at the last minute, you know? Short month. Shart week? I guess we can make this short week. Short week. Love it.

It's great. It's branding right there. It's sharp week here in the rewatchables. So there's cult favorites, which is kind of the foundation of the rewatchicles. Escape from New York, Swinger, shock collar, Den Thieves.

A, shock collar episode, plus. Thank you. One of my favorites in a long time. Really great. Proof of life. Not everyone loves proof of life. D minus.

8 millimeter? Yeah. Cold millimeter. Cold favorite. Yeah. Cruising? Yeah. For a certain kind of person?

Along came Polly is not a cold favorite because it made a lot of money. It was a big hit. So I was thinking, but it was critically, came out. There was stiller fatigue. There was Anniston fatigue. But it was a cult favorite that also made money. So I was thinking this is a new category called Slow Burner. Okay.

Slow burners. Miami Vice, the movie. Made money when it came out, but people were like, eh. And then as I got to know Chris Ryan, early 2010s, and we're like, I kind of like the Miami Vice movies. I do too. Mojitos. And by 2016, we're like, we got to do a podcast. You guys weren't GoFest boats together straight to Cuba.

So I married an Axe Murder, I think, is a slow burner. Good one. Did well, but not respected, but then grew. hardball with Keanu Reeves. See, we've done all these on the rewatchables. Came out, people are like, what the hell? Keanu's smoking, he's gambling. This is like I've just put on the Bill Simmons sunglasses,

like, and they live. I can see the world through your eyes. You know, this is how you see movies. The slow burner sunglasses. Limitless with Bradley Cooper. Good one, yeah. Did really well, but nobody took it seriously, and then it went on cable,

and people were like, this movie's incredible. You're describing movies that seem like you can write them off when they are released, whether they're successful or not, but when you dive into them, there's a lot there. There's a lot of meat on the bone. Are they citizen cane? No, they're not.

They're definitively not citizen cane. But they're kind of great in their own unique, mediocre way. I don't even think I saw a long-came Polly in the theater. And I don't really even remember when I first saw it. But Hoffman was the thing

that jumped out of it. And as the years passed, and it was 20 years. It's actually a 20-year anniversary of this movie was in January. We missed it. And the fact that... I was at the parade.

We did a parade in Times Square. Yeah, it was huge. It was incredible. The fact that Hoffman was just so great in this and it's such like a special unique Hoffman performance, turn this movie into something else. And now it's like almost a classic, which is crazy because it's like a generic Ben Stiller rom-com

for the most part with this insane Philip Seymour Hoff performance in it. Yeah, I think it's a solid comedy of its era that happens to have basically rocket fuel inside of it in the form of Philip Seymour Hoffman. And I wonder if we would have seen it in quite the same way if you hadn't tragically died when he did. Because now you look at like every Hoffman performance and you're like, what can we cherish about this? What did we overlook about this? Why didn't we celebrate this in time the way that we deserve to?

But he's doing something that he almost never really did again, which was just like pure broad studio comedy. Yeah. He really did not do very much about it. He's often funny in movies. But from the very first moment you see him in this movie, he's doing a pratfall. Like he's doing a Fairley Brothers gag. and so, you know, this is the one time when you can really lift him up

and be like, he could have been also Jim Carrey if you wanted to be. Well, you're the world's preeminent Phil Hoffman expert. Am I? You've done an entire Phil Hoffman podcast. I did. You've written about him.

No, but I think you've, a lot of people loved him, including me, but I think you probably loved him the most. He was my favorite actor. I think one of the things I love about this movie is it's the equivalent of, I don't know, if you took LeBron James in 2013

and you just put them on a college basketball team for like 10 minutes stretches. But it would be like if you put them on a college football team. You know, like it's not because it's... Yeah, true. You're right. This isn't like... He was just a wide receiver and he was like the best wide receiver

in college football. And you're like, what? So he's basically doing this part that has existed in rom-coms for the entire time we've had rom-coms. And in a different universe, it's a Jack Black part. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right?

I wonder if they even thought about him for this part. Yeah, he's probably the second call if they could. going to get Hoffman. Ben Siller did a movie with Jack Black in this same year, actually, a movie called Envy. Right. Galfinacus in The Hangover is another example of this, where it's actually somebody a little overqualified to be in the part. This is the most overqualified, I think an actor can be for a movie.

It would be like if you just put him in Scream and the David Arquette part. And it's like, here's Philip Seymour Hoffman is, what was that character's name? Who's slightly brain damage? Randy. No, what was the scream character's name, Craig? I don't know. Binky? The Jamie Kennedy part?

No, the David Arquette part. Oh, the David Arquette part. Dewey. Dewey. It's like, if Philip Seymour Hoffman was Dewee, we'd be like, this is weird. But he did this a few times in his career, which is one of the cool things about his career. Like, he's just in Twister randomly. He's the prep school kid and son of a woman.

He's got E. Boogie Nights. For some reason, he's, then you flip the other side. He's in Magnolia with, like, kind of the most. Nothing part in the movie, but makes the most of it. And this just seemed like what drove him. I just want to do this weird part, this weird part. You get the impression.

I mean, a lot of those roles you just mentioned were when he was still trying to make it as a movie actor. Yeah. Like in Twister, he's still coming up. He's not a character actor yet. People don't even know who he is. At this point in his career, he's pretty established as Philip Seymour Hoffman. Yeah. You know, it's, I'm not sure how much of this was for the money and how much of it was that he liked movies like this.

And, you know, we know, like, for example, his buddy, Paul Thomas Anderson, loves Adam Sandler, loves broad studio comedies. You know, like that's some of his favorite stuff. You could imagine them bonding over movies like this. So the chance to get to do a movie like this

is not that surprising. I mean, two years later, he's in a Mission Impossible movie. Same thing. It's like they put a battery in the back of that movie by putting the world's greatest actor in a villain part. So he had a good sense of how to use his tools in mainstream stuff.

Yeah, because he does Red Dragon and O2, which was, one of his first, this feels like slightly like a paycheck role. Yeah. But he's still good in it. Yeah. So like every two years he would do one of those.

So he does along came Polly, which he turns into more than a paycheck. I think it's probably one of his most beloved forms. He walks away with the movie. Yeah. Mission Impossible 3. And then ironically, it all,

the last two movies on his IMDB are Hunger Games movies. Mm-hmm. Which even in the Hunger Games, he jumps out of every scene. 100%. He has the greatest character name of all time in that movie, Plutarch Heavensby, which I fucking love. I've always loved that name. And yeah, he's, it's a much more controlled performance that last one. And it is exactly what we're talking about, where he's like, I'm sure the money was good for that one. It's a huge franchise. It was like the conclusion of that franchise. And it's a really important part. He's like the game maker. But it's weird that that's how things ended for him. You know, somebody who was in so many great movies. But doing a very similar thing. Always playing very rarely at the center.

always just left of center to the leading man. Yeah, well, this one, he comes in, he falls down, he's eating wedding cake icing. And just immediately, it's the movie I want to be with the whole time. And then he just kind of pops in it out. It's like Paul George in a Quipper's playoff game.

I believe you compare to a cat. Yeah, Paul George, just jumping under your lap and go to the garage. He's like a cat in this movie. Oh, he's back. He popped to the room. Oh, my God. The funniest person of the year is back.

Yeah, I love Sandy. Lyle. So we have, I'm really curious why he wanted to do this and there's been a lot of interviews. The director,

John Hamburg, has given a few interviews because one of the things that happened with this movie is the basketball scenes as,

as YouTube, YouTube hit, they became a YouTube thing. Then it became Instagram, Twitter, then it became TikTok. It's just

whatever social media form, just him firing shots against a backboard and screaming, white chocolate. Just like his, his, his, his, it just has, it's just going to live on and on and on now.

I think there's just like something incredibly recognizable about that character of the guy who's just like, I'm a baller for real. My shirt is too tight. And I am screaming on the pickup court about how good I am. And I suck. I just absolutely suck. So it can be applied to like when, you know, I don't know, James Hardin throws up a two for 17 in a playoff game, you know, exactly. Yeah. So I think it's like applicable all the time.

You know, something that I said about Hoffman when I did that pod earlier this year is like, he kind of is like an athlete or like a dancer in movies though. Like if you look at like Talented Mr. Ripley when he first shows up and he drives up, he hops out of the car and he runs towards the restaurant. Like he had kind of like a grace. He had like a dancer's grace to him. So even in this comic part where he's being a bad athlete, he's kind of mesmerizing the watch. He's definitely not a bad athlete.

You can see a move. He can run around like he played baseball. ball and wrestling and he wrestled as a kid. You can see he's, he knows that a handle. It's Chris Farley-esque. Very much. Very much. He's got like a grace in all of his clumsiness.

I mean, Belushi is the most famous for that because Belushi was like really good athlete and they always tried to leverage it into S&L sketches and other stuff he did. But yeah, it's funny how some of the best comic performances or performers, the physicality and the athleticism is such a big piece that. I mean, Jim Carrey, there's this SNL account that I like where they should. show the old sketches. They had one where remember that Night of the Rocksbury sketch they used to do with Will Ferrell that they'd turn

in a movie and they would be at the bar and they'd be like talking to the girls and do like you, you, and they'd walk up and come back. And Jim Carrey's in it and he comes out and his head starts doing like... I remember this. His head's like going over here and there and it's just like he was just such an incredible

I don't even know if that's athleticism. He was like the Bo Jackson of physical comedy, you know? He could do anything. Nothing could stop him. Because I think that's probably the best SNL ever. I remember that one vividly.

What was it was it for like Truman Show The Majestic? I can't remember what year. Maybe man on the moon. Might have been

liar, liar. Lyer, like somewhere in there. Yeah, he does the lifeguard sketch with Wolf Farrow because Will Ferrell

was big at that point and then Carrie came in and just blew it away. Anyway, we're getting carried away. But the Hoffman has it. And, you know,

I'm glad he did it. It kind of made me wistful that he didn't do more comedy. I consider Sky, Scottie J, even though Boogie Nights had some of the most serious moments. But when we did the Boogie Nights pod, we talked about how fucking funny Scotty J was. Yeah.

I mean, sometimes he's really funny in a movie on purpose. Like, he's really funny and talented Mr. Ripley. Yeah, he is. How's the peep in and all that? Freddy. Like, he knows what he's doing there. He's really funny and alive and almost famous. He's on fire in Punch Drunk Love as Mattress Man.

Yeah. You know, with the shut, shut, shut, shut. Like, he's really... But after, like, in the 2000... most of his stuff is quite serious like Synecatee New York and doubt and these really grave dire movies Yeah

I haven't revisited that one lately When are we doing that on Rock Bottom Month part two Rock Rock Rock Bottom Month Granite Bottom Month Well he's also in happiness Which I was a runner up for Rock Bottom Kind of a funny movie though

But like in the most fucked up way imaginable I called the producers of happiness When we decided in the lineup for Rock Bottom Month And I'm like, sorry, guys, it's not, it's not you. This is just the lineup we had. You did nothing wrong. Sorry, Todd Salon. Yeah, in another world, you guys could have made it.

Sorry, Dylan Baker. Yeah. So this will be Hoffman's seventh rewatchable. Really? Yeah. We've done Senate of a Woman, Boogie Nights, Talented Mr. Ripley, Magnolia, 25th hour, along came Pauley and Moneyball. Pretty good.

And what's crazy, you could argue he might end up with five more on the roster. I'm holding out for the master. Almost famous. Almost famous. When will that be? It's probably the last episode. Okay. Twister.

100%. We should do it this summer. Big Lebowski. You know there's another twisters. I'm aware. Okay. Big Lobowski. We've done that.

You weren't on it. Did we do it? Yeah. I think it was... Are you sure we did it? Me, CR, Concepcion, and Shoemaker. We did it? So he's been in eight rewax.

Watchables. I'm counting him for Big Labask. I know he didn't have a giant part in that. You forgot about my Patch Adams solo episode. Patch Adams. My wife and I, we always used to joke about that and call Patch Adams. Like, it's such a bad movie.

Mission Impossible 3. Did we do that one? No, we did not do that one. I think we've only done two Mission Impossible. The Master and Happiness. So 8 puts him near the... He might be top 10 now for most rewatchables movies. Denzel, the Tom's, Julia.

Who else is up there? The cruise is 15, though. Yeah. I was thinking the 10 movie club is kind of our equivalent of the five-timers club for us and Ohos. Yeah. You get the 10 rewatchable's movies. You've had a special career.

I think we can get Denzel to come on in here, sit down. We can put the 10 movie medal around his neck. He would definitely would not do that. And he refused to talk about, I don't talk about my old movies. Let's talk about the Knicks. What if we did like the bone collector to celebrate him coming in, though? Just put him in a bed? But back to slow,

burner month. Why do you think it happens that way? Why do, like, movies that actually did well and made money, but then something shifts and they become a thing? In this case, we know is Hoffman. Is it have to be like just a unique thing about the movie? What is it? I mean, there's so much to talk about with this movie contextually

because there were five Ben Stiller movies this year. And it was, that's evidence of what kind of a time it was in Hollywood. When, you know, this is Craig's hobby horse. just like, why do we not have more studio comedies? At this time, we were cranking them out. There were so many of them. And it also dovetails with a kind of DVD dorm room culture where I think movies like this really succeeded.

It's also doubles as a date movie. So you can watch this with your girlfriend. Yeah. It's also the rise of YouTube. So you put all that stuff in a stew. And if you want to just watch Hoffman cook, you can just watch Hoffman. If you want to watch this movie with your girlfriend,

you can watch this on the couch at home. if you want to go to see a funny movie on a Friday night. Like, this is kind of at the top of your list if you're a moviegoer at this time because it kind of has something for everyone. And you get to go to St. Bart's. As you know, I like going on locations. That's true, with some travel. If you're a fan of Hank Azaria's abs, we've got that, you know.

There's some stuff on offer here. I'll say this. In 2004, I don't feel like it was as big of a deal that Hoffman had this part, was in this movie. And I think it was really fun to have them. it, but I think the legend grew with him year by year. And partly the legend grew because the movies he was in became so rewatchable. You know, I, everyone was like, this guy's great, right?

He was in this guy's great territory, basically from late 90s on. Yeah. But I think late 2000s range, it started to go up a level. And then obviously when he died, but when somebody dies, that pushes people's appreciation of the work to a different stratosphere. Well, I mean, literally the next movie that he makes is Capote and he wins best actor. And so that I think pretty significantly alters how we consider him because he was the kind of guy who are like hardcore movie fans and, you know, people who really were into acting. And, you know, he's a big Broadway performer too. I saw him in True West years before this, I think, with John C. Riley.

Actually, it might have been 0.4. I can't remember what year it was when I saw him. I might have been the same year. and he just blew everyone's mind. Like, he blew everyone's mind 10 years later in death of a salesman. Like, he, people who were fans were hardcore fans. But Capote, I think, because he had that long run

of Oscar campaigning and then eventually one consecrated him in a way. And then after that, everything he did was kind of like, what will be the next great Phillips Seymour Hoffman performance? And he kind of defied expectations. You know, he kind of reverted back to, I do supporting parts. He didn't do a lot of movie.

where he was at the center. And if he did, it was usually a very small movie, an independent movie and not a mainstream studio movie. So I think people came to appreciate along-came Polly and what he did in it

even more so after the fact because they were like, wow, the guy who played Truman Capote did the sharding movie. You know, like, that's range. It'd be like, if Daniel DeL Day Lewis had had that part.

Exactly. D.L. How many best actor, previous best actor winners could have played Sandy Lyle? That's a good game. You know, could Frederick March have played Sandy Lyle?

I say no. Yeah, you start getting into like Adrian Brody, Pacino. We start going through. Pacino. I love that. Pacino is Sandy Lyle? Rain drop! The basketball would have been tough for him.

Well, you mentioned this weird era. There were too many Ben Stiller movies, and I think that was one of the things that hurt this movie. He was just too omnipresent, always playing Ben Stiller. Yes. He has a comic persona. And it's the person in this movie,

it's the person there's something about, Mary. Anxious, uptight guy. Well, I like it. Like, he zags with Zoolander. That's really the one. But yeah, the upside, meet the parents. Same thing.

And Aniston is basically the same person in every movie. She just changes her hair. And I think that something about when this movie came out, it was like, really? These two? Like, we were already kind of all getting tired of the two of them as personas, which is why the Hoffman piece is so important. But as the years passed and neither of them, you know, still didn't make that many more rom-coms. He did like the Heartbreak Kid.

maybe like one or two more and then, you know. Yeah, you're right. He doesn't do a lot of them. I mean, he went on to do a lot of interesting movies, but he went away from this formula. He veered away from this. But I think as the years passed, that that part is more tolerable

than maybe it was in 04. When you put out five movies in a year, that's just a suicide mission. Nobody wants that. Yeah, it seems like it was kind of luck and circumstance in a variety of things that factored into it. But, I mean, he didn't just put out five movies in a year. he was this, actually he was in six movies this year,

and he was the star of four of them, like the star. Along came Polly, Starskin Hutch, N.V., dodgeball, and Meet the Fockers. All in that same year, plus he does a little bit part of Anchorman. Yeah. And so... And Starsky and Hutch was a big-ass movie.

Todd Phillips. Yeah. There was real excitement about it, but yeah, it's just, this was the comedy boom. I think he's a little bit of a, um, I always say like a black liquorish guy where, you know how, like, I can't eat black licorish. Like, I put it in my mouth and I'm like,

there's something poisonous about this. I thought it was poisonous. I don't eat black curbs. Yeah, I really don't like black licorice. And some actors or actresses are like black licorce for people where they take a bite and they're like, ugh. I worked for a guy at a magazine years ago who was just like, we will never feature Ben Stiller in our magazine.

I find him incredibly annoying. Wow. Which I always thought was really funny because I always liked him. Like, I liked his TV show that he had. I like a lot of these movies. I thought he's amazing and there's something about Mary. his persona always worked for me but he comes from like a legendary comedy family

he goes on to make like great tropic thunder like really great comedy classics but I always keep that in the back of my head that for some people they're just like he's not for me yeah there's something about Mary's 98 he rips off meet the parents

Zoolander, World Tannenbombs along came Polly Starsky and Hutch Anchorman and Dodgeball in the same year meet the Fokkers Heartbreak Kid Tropic Thunder that's all in 10 years plus a bunch of other movies that he did too there's something about Mary is hanging over this movie too

because that launches the R-rated comedy boom there's some DNA from that movie in this movie like there's another bathroom scene with Ben Siller we're in the bathroom with him with something embarrassing happening and it's kind of the tail end of the R-rated comedy and then we start moving into the Apatow version of it so this is like the we're at the tail end of 1.0 version of this and then Apatow becomes 2.0.

Yeah, and he always kind of operated alongside those guys, but not totally with them. Yeah. Which I always thought was kind of fascinating. His career after this is really interesting. Like, he keeps making Night of the Museum movies, and he does some franchise stuff, does Zoolander, too. He does a few movies with Noel Bomback. But do you remember the last time he headlined a movie? Well, he was directing, too, right?

He did the prison thing that Chris and I loved, Escape from Danamora. He's going to Escape of Danamora, and he does severance now. That's the lead directs in seven. Both of those shows are great. Yeah. But as a movie star, he hasn't really top-lined a movie since 2017. The Meyerowitz story is the Bondback movie.

So it's been seven years since he was the star of a movie. That's pretty crazy for somebody who at one time, I think you could credibly say, was one of the 10 leading men in Hollywood. We made a lot of money. Tropic Thunder was his probably biggest, most ambitious swing. And it was a huge success. Yeah.

really funny. I had a really cool, original, unique movie. Craig's generation doesn't like it. You know, Craig's triggered by... I adore that movie. I thought you were triggered by Tropic Thunder. Don't put that on me.

Triggered Month? Triggered Month. No, Tropic Thunder is amazing. Aniston's movie career... Yeah, here we go. I'd forgotten it wasn't going well until 2003. She had not made a $100 million movie

until 2003, and then it just blows up. She does Bruce Almighty. That makes $485. Polly makes $1.78. That was entirely choked up to her, too. She was on the poster, front and center. Hey, listen, man, she's Scotty Pippin in that movie.

You're sure. Polly, the breakup, 206. She's Marley and me, just not into you, the bounty hunter, just go with it, horrible bosses, where the Miller. So she has a decade of she's a bankable A-plus-less actress for comic movies, which I was not sure. It was looking a little dodgy when she was in Rockstar. You were like, I don't know if this is going to happen.

It felt a little friends might have overtaken her. Like she's just Rachel and people can't accept her. She's good in office space. Very good, very funny. But that's, again, these are all kind of girlfriend parts, and it takes along came Polly for her to get out of the girlfriend parts in a way. She did do a couple smaller, like the good girl. She's really good and the good girl, which is like an indie that she was doing,

I think, to break out of Rachel. Yeah. The thing that is notable about this, think is that this movie is the last movie that she made while Friends was still on. Well, and it was right as Brandelaine is in the worst. We're on the way towards Mr. and Mrs. Smith. So it feels like her career is, we're our friends is over like this. And then all of a sudden she becomes an even bigger star.

And then the movie start hitting and somehow becomes a bigger star than she was in Friends. Yeah, she picked a couple of really good projects. I think the breakup was like really smart to make a movie called The Breakup after Mr. Mrs. Smith was very smart. Also a movie we all thought we were going to like and it was just missing something. Not a huge fan. It's a grim two hours.

I've struggled with her a little bit. I'm friends, I'm like, this is one of the great characters. Like, we were just mesmerized by her in the 90s. You know, we were interested in her every move. As a movie actor, I wish she was always given a little bit more to do. This movie is kind of an interesting mix, though.

Like, it obviously is a classic opposite to track setup and they have chemistry. Like, they work together. I think the movie really lives and dies on scenes like the stabbing the pillows scene, you know, where you're like, oh, I feel their connection and I want to hang out with these people. Because that's what this kind of a movie is. It's interesting. I'm zagging on you a tiny bit.

I didn't totally feel it. Really? Yeah, it's like, do you see those two people together, I guess is my question. Well, that's what Roger Ebert says. He's like, I'm not sure if I buy this. You're not sure if you buy the two people? Yeah, I like them together. I felt like they seemed like they liked each other.

in real life, seem like they had some energy together. Yeah, they seem like people who would date for a while and then decide they should be best friends. Yeah. You know, it's another weird thing about this that is sort of related is, you know, he goes on and make the Heartbreak Kid remake. Right. Which is kind of the same movie?

Yeah. It's like a movie about a newly married couple that goes on a vacation and then they break up on their honeymoon. Right. It's very strange that he did this twice. And it's with Billions, with Axis's wife. Yeah, yeah. She was your favorite actress of the year Billions debuted, right?

Felt bad. Always felt bad criticizing her, but that character just didn't work. You won't even look me in the eye when you say that, Bill. I won't. I was looking up, I forgot to do Raj for this. A rare miss for me. That's okay. I'm helping out.

No, Raj was two stars. Yeah. He didn't love it, but weirdly, well, he knows Hoffman. He's like, I'll tell you what I did like about this movie, Philip Seymour Hoffman. It's like the second and last graph of the review. Yeah. I did like Philip C. Moore Hoffman

as Sandy, Ruben's best man. Yeah. He's in on Philipsybroffin. Can't find anything else nice to say about it? That is a little paragraph. Listen, the story of this movie

isn't really up Raj's alley. You know, it's... Not the best on broad comedy, Raj over the years. No. You know, we talked about this on the Tommy Boy up with Sal. You know, you just,

you didn't get it. It's okay. It's okay that you didn't get it. Sometimes you miss. He missed. Although he probably is no Tommy boy. Where does your generation stand on Ben Stiller, Craig? I think all of the most popular Ben Stiller roles in our minds are the character spots that he played.

Like when I think of Ben Stiller, I think of Happy Gilmore. Like I like Ben Stiller when he goes weird. I think straight man Ben Stiller, you know, it's fine. Oh, your fingers hurt? Yeah, that's like the best role ever. You're going to need a warm glass to shut the hell up. Well, he also, he did the best Cruz impression.

His impression of Cruz was the best celebrity impression maybe of that decade. Yeah, I like weird stiller. Better than just like classic straight man stiller. Yeah, in Dodge Bowl, he's really funny. Yes, he's the best at that. Yeah. He does this movie.

I don't remember if we've ever talked about on the rewatchable. His friends and neighbors. Oh, yeah. With Jason Patrick. Absolutely. Your guy, Neil LaBute. Yeah.

Yeah. And it's one of the most fucked up late 90s movies. I don't know what theme month we would be doing it for in the rewatchables, but it would be like a definite fucked up one. Yeah, castration month. Yeah.

Right, castration month. But he's in that and it felt like there's, I always felt, I have no evidence of this, that deep down Ben Stowe just wanted to be like a weird indie dramatic actor and, you know, do those kind of movies. And like he, like in an all-turned universe, it could have been him instead of Adam Driver and marriage story.

Yeah. I mean, look at his big breakthrough as a movie person, is directing reality bites. I mean, that's really who he is. And that movie is such an interesting blend of like kind of movie stardom and these very attractive, beautiful people doing cool things, young, cool things.

But also has that like odd edginess and a little bit of like a Gen X dissatisfaction with the world. And like, I think him doing the Boundback movies later in his career, is it kind of a testimony to how he sees the world? Like the Greenberg,

Meyerowitz stories and what's the one in between while we're young those three movies are all like almost him getting movie stardom out of his system Greenberg especially

that was one where you could film going for it yes did you like that movie um interesting I think it's a really good movie about how some people

react to Los Angeles you know that like some people are just it's kind of how black liquor it can be a black liquor city sometimes for some people

this movie was written and directed by John Hamburg who also did I Love You Man in 2009 that I really like. Should also be a rewatchable. I randomly, I met Paul read a couple weeks ago, and we were talking about a bunch of stuff, and I asked him about, I love you, man. And I was like, what's the reaction of that movie now?

And he's like, oh, people like that movie now. But I was like, but it didn't do that well. When it came out, right, it was all right. Yeah. Didn't do great. But it was another example of, like, sometimes the clusters with comedies, they can just come out at the wrong time.

Yeah. You know what I mean? I mean, slap it to base, man. And that's like burned into my brain. I think a lot of the movies that we're talking about here are like if you saw it when you were like 11, it stays with you forever. Yeah. That is the Tommy Boy conversation for me. I just saw it when I was 11.

It doesn't matter what happens for the rest of my life. I always think that movie is funny. Yeah. I think that's an example of a movie that a lot of people saw when they were 11. I'm like, I love that movie. I'm holding on to that movie forever. Because other times, I was thinking about this with the Glenn Powell's Sydney movie movie. That comes out and it was just kind of the right time for a movie like that.

Yep. And it was marketed perfectly. It's totally watchable. It hits every checkpoint. And now I feel like it's a movie. My daughter is probably going to watch 12 times. It's also bad. Well, that's the thing.

It's not a great movie. No, it's not. But it came along at the right time and had the right conceit and had the right stars in it. And now it'll kind of last probably, which is weird because it's not that good. I'm really hopeful that that movie and the fall guy and a couple of other movies that are happening right now are like slowly easing us back into the era when in 2004 like they were just at our fingertips all the time. I feel like audiences being excited about anyone but you

is very exciting. Whether or not that movie is any good. I don't think it's that great. You did. We're taping this before the weekend. You're doing the fall guy for big picture. We did. Yeah. You should have brought me on for two minutes. Okay. To discuss how important Heather Thomas and Markey Post were in the context of the 80s. Next time. Just, I mean, The floor is yours. We can cut it into the episode. Two hugely important people of the 80s. At the risk of spoiling anything about the fall guy,

maybe Heather Thomas makes an appearance. Oh, that sounds great. I'll be there. Did you see the fall guy? See that in the theater. We're going to take a break. Oh, by the way, $42 million budget made $178 million, which is like, I was actually shocked that the movie made this much.

That's insane. This is the heyday of comedies. Yes. I wonder where that stands in the Ben Stiller. I guess he has them. He has some big ones. Yeah, he's got some big-ass one. That's a shitload of money, though, for a movie like this.

A lot of money. We'll take a break. We'll be back with re-watchable scenes. This episode is brought to by Pure Michigan. In Grand Rapids, every moment feels like a scene worth replaying. Every Riverside Stroll, every slow afternoon sipping small batch brews. Every guitar riff drifting out of the city's brand new amphitheater. This is a place where everything feels cinematic.

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Services not available in all areas. All right, most rewatchable scene. This movie starts out with a banger. We're at the wedding, and we just get Hoffman right away. Best man's in the house! He does a great pratfall. He does like five things in this movie that absolutely,

like I rarely laugh when I watch movies. But when the guy is the wedding icing, what are those things called? I don't know. The squeers. And he's like, give it to me. And the guy's just squirting wedding icing. Hey, aren't you that kid from Crocodile Tears?

That's right. I'm Samuel Lyle. Man, I saw that movie in high school, that bagpipe scene. That was the funniest shit, man. I had a good time on that picture. You want an autograph? No, thanks. It's good to see you, man.

I thought you died like 15 years ago. Ah, nah. I'm very much alive, my friend. I've been doing a lot of stage acting, getting back to my roots. Sandy, we should kick home because they're making an E2 Hollywood story on me, so that should clear up a lot of your questions. So they're really doing one of those shows about your life?

Yeah, I got a camera. Within the first few minutes, you're like, all right, Phil Hoffman's going to do anything he can, no matter how disgusting it is to make us laugh. Yeah, you know immediately. You want an autograph? No, I'm good. Thanks.

You're the kid from crocodile tears. And then we also get to see Rubin doing his wedding risk assessment. It's just a really strong four minutes. We get a wedding. Then all of a sudden here comes Alec Baldwin. He's kind of doing his departed character. I'm obsessed with Alec Baldwin's movie. You want to save this for later?

Sure. In Durstki, yeah. We'll save it for later. So we got that scene. We have after, unless you want to count him walking in a Deborah Messing getting railed by Hank Azaria. the boat. I think there is something

perversely entertaining about the entire Hank Azari introduction and like watching Deborah Messing's eyes in those scenes where she's just like I want to bone this guy like the second who shows up. I enjoy that. I like when after

first of all the scuba things hitting the side of the boat is hilarious. But then when they're on land and her hair is like completely fucked up but she's like, I'm going through something. And she just looks like she'd had like the craziest sex ever. And this is also at the height of Will and Grace, too.

Yeah, yeah. She was a big star at the time. I was in Hank Azari, a big star from TV. Yeah, she's good in this. But that scene's fun. So, like, when he backs the car backwards, but then the next cut is him, Hank Azari driving him to the airport.

And he's just holding him angrily. Ruben goes back to work and peas with the Nerski. I have as the next rewatchable scene. I will fire this one up on YouTube every once in a while. Yeah. is a great fart. He sidles up right next to him in the year. Does like the longest pee.

She's a dime store hooker and she always will be. I heard about your honeymoon. Just terrible. I knew that girl was a slut the second I met her. Yeah, well, you know, it's kind of complicated. Hey, don't make excuses. She's a dime store hooker and she always will be. Just put it behind you.

Speaking of which, you ever hear of a guy named Leland Van Blue? That's just, that guy is Long Island to me. Like, that's just like, that's one of my dad's friends, unfortunately. So you think that's what he was going for, a Long Island accent? Jersey, Long Island, you know, East Coast, you know, yeah. And then he said, this accent, I had such a good time doing it. I'm just going to bring it to Boston and the departed. Yes, yes.

And just not say the ours, but basically do a Nerski. And both the departed and Along Came Polly come before 30 Rock. They're right before 30 Rock starts. And you can see he's like, I'm in a new era. Like I'm doing only this kind of thing now. I'm only having fun. This little mini pocket of Alec Baldwin is a great time. Well, it really starts with outside Providence when he's the kid's dad.

He's like, hey, whatever is that he has the terrible nicknames for his kids. He's just talking like this. Well, the next scene that's going to be the winner, we go from, I just sharded right into the basketball scene. I mean, this is like some of the best seven minutes of the 2000s. Hoffman in the elevator saying that he only knows this guy, this artist, and they're going to his gallery because he sold him some good pot in the 90s.

And then it's like a cutaway, and it's an overhead shot of him surrounded by 20 artsy-looking people and saying, I'm so horny. It's incredible stuff. I just sharded, followed by the way he's kind of like walking, like the way his body's moving

is also amazing. Trying to keep it tight and loose at the same time. Yeah, it's incredible. So I'm combining this with the basketball scene because it's this whole seven minutes. Let it rain,

rain dance. What was that? I'm just messing with his Sasquatch. Let's get it on. Rain dance! I'm burning. Tongue. White chocolate.

Calling the guy, Sasquatch. Then Ben Stiller asked for the switch. He's like, no, no, I've figured out this guy's moves. I can't switch. Yeah, it's one of the most legendary athlete performances in movie history. I was thinking about there's this whole subgenre of really fun sporting event scenes and movies happening in like weird New York parks like that. Like Big has the handball scene. Yeah.

But we have to come up with a list of those at some point. Gosh. Maybe for the new YouTube channel. But it would be fun to do all the goofy. Top five New York sports scenes. Well, because it's always like a really terrible, like, half court basketball court. Right. Or it's like, you know, like this kind of a racquetball court, but people are also playing tennis.

Right. Not a lot of soccer scenes taking place in New York City. Yeah. Not a lot of soccer. There's racquetball in this movie, too. with Brian Brown. Yeah, I had, I'll do this now. I was going to do what age the worst.

Does racquetball age the worst? Has racquetball been replaced by pickleball? I'll tell you, I've never played in my whole life. I played in the 90s a little. Yeah? It's a violent sport. It is. You really, you know what it wasn't helping me?

It was like going out in Boston and having SIGs every once in a while and then trying to play racquetball. You really need lungs. You're heaving. Need your lungs. It always just seemed, like a little too intense, like tennis is fun. Racquetball, I'm like, I don't want to get punched.

Racquetball is a good place to get inadvertently hit with a racket to blow out your ACL, to sprain an ankle, to hurt your Achilles. I love racquetball. You do? I played in college. You did? Yeah. Like, like, in an organized way?

Our gym had a couple of racquetball course that you could rent out. It's super fun. It's so fun. If you play with something, it's like ping pong or tennis or like volleyball. There are certain sports where it's like the people playing have to be good. But then if they are, It's amazing. And I feel like if you're playing with the right person with racquetball,

it is really, really fun. Other than basketball, probably the highest percentage of you're about to get into a fist fight with somebody when you're playing racquetball. Because there's all these different ways you can screw each other up. You're literally in like a windowless box. That's not a good scenario for me. As you guys know, sometimes I kind of blow my top.

So I don't know if that's, especially in sporting circumstances. It's a violent sport. I like racquetball. Bring it back. Yeah. It should come back. I was not high lion racquetball. Maybe we should revisit both of those.

Your beloved pickleball may have replaced it, unfortunately. Pickleball for losers. I mean, honestly. Next rewatchable scene, Sandy eating the greasy pizza. Every single moment in the pizza scene, where he's preparing it. The insert shot when he takes the cover off the red pepper

and dicks his fingers into the red pepper jar. It takes the, takes Ben Stillers pizza slice so he can pour The more grease is the best part. Oh, man. And then that goes right into Ben Stowe's, I guess I should call him Rubin's name of the movie, but the Moroccan dinner date.

Are you okay? Because you're sweating pretty profusely. Yeah, no, I'm fine. I always react this way to spicy food. Okay. Yeah, but I love it. God, you know, I can't believe you're not married. I mean, even when we were kids,

I always saw you as that guy that would settle down at a young age, you know, you were always kind of like an old young guy. Yeah, well, it just has a... It doesn't happen. But what about you? You ever gotten closer? Oh, to the whole marriage thing? Oh, God, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I'm not really big on the whole long-term commitment thing. Why, are you coming out of a bad relationship? No, I'm kind of coming out of like eight bad relationships. Eight? You sure I can't get you towel or something? No, no, I'm good. But, I mean, if the right person came along, things might be different, right? when he's like, you're not going to tell her about the

Heardel bow, said you're going to some place it didn't sound too ethnic Alpharees and then the next scene is just eating like Moroccan shit with their hands. Have you ever been in a situation like that where you've got a date you're excited about this person you're going on a date with

and they want to do something that you're like, this is a bad idea for me. Oh man. Hold on. Let me think back. Go back in the brain dated. Yeah. I don't have a lot of experience. I can't remember a date where it was like, I'm really taking one for the team here. Like, I really need to get laid so badly. I'm doing this.

Because this is really, like, this is the big question of the movie is, and this is the thing that I think Ebert bumped on in the movie, is, is Jennifer Aniston appealing enough? And is Ben Stiller's character in as low a moment as he is, like enough to justify going, for example, to this dinner date?

there's a different reading that is related to the Philips Seymour Hoffman character which is that because he's such a still or such a fastidious uptight guy he's drawn to people who are

a mess and Derski's a mess he works for him Sandy's a mess he's disgusting Polly is all over the place he's drawn to her and that that's like

maybe his inner anxiety reaching out which I think is kind of maybe an overread of a silly movie like along came Polly but kind of interesting but also

Eber was like this doesn't make sense or he's it's self-loathing is trying to, like, torture him. Could be. Could be. I'm fine with him going on the date, but you don't, if you know,

like, you're going to have real problems, and it's, especially in New York City, there's no way you're going up. You'd be like, hey, I had a great time. I'm out of here. That's my biggest nitpick of the movie.

You're not, oh, cool. Oh, it's a, it's a two-room studio where you've been in those apartments. I lived in one. The bathroom's, like, right on top of it. You can hear every noise in the bathroom.

There's just no way he's going up there. Not ideal. Is this Apex Mountain? for IBS. I was thinking about that. It might be. Could be up there. I can't remember a better IBS scene.

There's another character. I'm at the tip of my tongue about IBS, but yeah, I definitely learned about something like this from movies. This is pretty gross. The bathroom disaster. I'm not a huge

bathroom humor guy. As you know, I love, I love a... You love a juvenile sense of humor, but not a gross sense of humor. And I just feel like every version of,

of a bathroom scene has been done at this point. So even in 2004, this felt a tiny bit tired. But it is funny. It's pretty funny. What if I was like, Bill, I'm a huge toilet humor guy. Would that just be the biggest bag of all time? Top nine toilet scenes. I think it's okay. It's fine.

It feels a little, like you said, redundant. So there's something about, there's something about Mary scene in the bathroom with the zipper is just legendary material followed up by the earlobe later on in the movie. Like that is the funniest of the funny. this one is okay

it's just like oh you shit in front of a girl it's very similar to the dumb and dumber one it is not as good it is I like that you said the earlobe scene and not the cum shot scene I like that you went PG instead of our

so it's a good good edit is this a family program well not really the salsa date I have to just quickly we get more hoops he's thrown in it's ice man

I don't know know why they haven't put like the 15 minute unedited Hoffman playing basketball cut. They should air it at MSG during playoff games. I would be fired up. Yeah, seriously. Rangeloft! Every time Brunson drops one, yeah.

Polly finds the list. Just get drama. We'll get into some of the issues with that later. And then the two last big rewatchable scenes. Jesus Christ Superstar. You knew we had to see that one being performed. Goes terribly, but leads to the dad's big speech.

Yeah. It's not about what happened in the past or what you think might happen in the future. It's about the ride, for Christ's sake. There's no point in going through all this crap if you're not going to enjoy the ride. And you know what? When you least expect something great, when you least expect that something great might come along. Something better than you even planned for. All of a sudden, there's like real wisdom in this movie.

I totally agree with that. It's all about the ride. This is what you said to me right before we started the ringer. You know, you were like, just think, if you stick it out for nine years, we can do the top nine toilet humor movies of all time because it's all about the ride. This is what I said when I was trying to convince you to work for Grantland. I'm like, look, I laid out a couple things. It might be issues.

And then I was like, but remember, Sean, it's all about the ride. Yeah, that was definitely what it was like at Grantland. It was the ride for sure. It was definitely a ride. And then the last one, Sandy handles the big meeting. This movie does something really interesting where it flips. It feels like it's just doing the generic. Oh, here's the hero running to co-catch the game.

girl before their relationship blows up and rips off when Harry met Sally and Billy Crystal running through. We've just seen that scene. You're like, ah, they're going to do this again. But no, we go to Sandy Lyle. It's actually San Di Lyle's moment. He's finally going to do it. He's going to come together and save the big account with Coglin from Cocktown.

And all of us here, Edendurby and friends, are willing to lay our asses on the line and proudly recommend that Leland, Ban Lu, received $50 million in life and health and automobile insurance for a duration of no less than 20 years. What do you think, guys? Are you that kid from Crocodile Tears? You're goddamn right I am. I thought so. Impressive presentation.

He's insured. I love that scene. Hoffman's performance is incredible when he puts his hands on the. shoulder of the wrong guy is one of the funniest bits in the movie. Don't forget about, are you the kid from crocodile tears? In that scene, though, he is directly channeling Ben Affleck in Goodwill Hunting. He's like, retainer. Like, it's the same kind of performance.

What do you have for most rechargeable scene? If you're going to pair up the art gallery sharding and the basketball scene, that's in like a comedy Mount Rushmore sequence. It's got to be the winner. Best seven minutes ever. Yeah. That would be a good idea for the YouTube channel. Just run that scene.

Best seven minutes. Best seven minutes sequences in movie history. Just best seven minutes. Seven minutes. I loved to real-time brainstorm with you. This is how we make the content here. Dirt from the moment he shows up at the pool party and meets Reed. Yeah.

And Reed's like, they start making drinks, you lift. People tell me I look like Han Solo. All the way through the pool jump. Uh-huh. Yeah. Be a good, good gimmick. Maybe if we just did seven minutes Hoffman, so it's just different seven-minute stretches.

Like Hoffman listening to the jazz record in the record store and Ripley when he's just like getting down? Love that. What's age the best? Baldwin's accent. I love all movies with Baldwin accents. Enderski is a legend. World needs to plenty of bartenders. Good things.

Good things. It's too bad Baldwin. shot somebody and is going to be in a trial for the next 10 years. Because I love the Alk Baldwin in movies. It's hard to unwind Rust from Alk Baldwin now. Sounds like a rock bottom month sequel. Yeah. It's tough.

Craig's Generation knows Baldwin. It's like, oh, he's the guy who shot somebody on the set. I'm not like 12. I just like, Craig's Generation is a thing down. That also means that 12-year-olds are reading the Rust News and being like, this is just a tragedy.

One of our greats. Twelve-year-olds are on the Hollywood Reporter news site. Baldwin's 30 Rock for me Okay, great You'll, when we do malice You'll really fully understand Baldwin And that's definitely a movie you haven't seen There's also, I like the reading

That the Baldwin character Is his character from Glenn Gary Glenn Ross Like all grown up Like wearing the suspenders And he's got the belly But he's basically like a shark Yeah, the overgrown shark I like that

A Nerski What's age the best Semi underrated New York movie Remember we were talking about when we were going to New York for the live rewatchables and we were like New York movies and there's both like a ton of New York movies but then also

not a lot of New York movies. I wouldn't say it's in the Serpico Dog Day Afternoon category. But has a lot of New York scenes. It does. It's definitely a New York movie. I mean it looks like it was shot there. Yeah. It was shot there, right? And they're going to galleries and you know,

you feel like you're in New York. And same with like the restaurants. Like those are, that's absolutely the way that you would go out on dates and especially if you live downtown, like my wife and I, when we were living there, we're going to places like that all the time.

I have a bunch of what's age the best, but do you have any ones before I step on all of them? I think the Anniston arc looks a lot better than it did at the time. You know what I mean? I think her as a movie star,

because I thought about this a lot too before we were talking about it. Like, there was a lot of questions as to whether it was going to work after picture perfect, you know, like that movie, it didn't fly. I've seen it like 12 times. I seem to recall you being a big picture perfect guy. You know who wrote that movie, right?

Aaron Sorkin. Is that true? I think so, yeah. I mean, Aniston's, you know. Say it, just say the words. Mid-90s, Anniston. She was an all-timer. Yeah, she was beautiful.

All-timer. Her film choices were not great. But now you look back and you're like, even something we're with the Millers, which is similar to this movie which when it came out I was like okay this is kind of funny and then was a massive hit and helped kind of like

continue to elevate her status as a comic actress and now you'll go down her CV and be like actually she has like five or seven or nine movies that I really like horrible bosses worked when it came out and it was a good one for another good example

yeah we're like we don't really do those movies too much on the show no but like 2011 on comedies well because some of them have an age great and then others have aged really nicely

like this one. But it kind of comes and goes. Yeah. But definitely Aniston. Hoffman kind of goes without saying. And then Craig's generation killed comedy.

That's the next thing that happened. That's right. That's what triggered month will be about. Yeah. We're just too anxious now for comedy. We're sad about everything. Craig's, people were like,

I love neighbors. And Craig's like, they should do neighbors too, but flip it. And that was it. That was the death of comedy right now. I made that call. Craig made it.

What about the sororities? Somebody asked them. Yeah. Yeah. He's like, what about the other side of this? What about a film told through the perspective of the administrators at the university? That would be the more idealistic version. What's age the best?

The concept of the child actor who peaks when he's 10. Ingenious. So when I was in high school, we had the kid. I talked about this in the Kramer v. Kramer podcast. The kid from Kramer versus Kramer was in the high school. And it was just like he was the kid from Kramer versus Kramer. That was his identity. And that's a tough thing to break out of.

I went to middle school and high school with a child actor as well, who I won't name, but who was in private parts and was in Richie Rich. Oh. I'm sure we can't Google that. Was a super talented actor and a really nice kid. But I remember when he got cast in private parts, I was like, can this happen? Like, is it possible that a child who lives on Long Island could possibly be in a movie? Like, I couldn't wrap my head around the idea of what, like, all child actors to me.

were kids on Dawson's Creek, basically. And this movie kind of sums up the, like, sad but not tragic, likely outcome of childhood stardom. Hamburg said the director and writer, he said he auditioned for the champ and didn't get it. And then it always thought about what would have happened if I got it. He personally auditioned for the champ. Oh, interesting. What would my life have been like if I had just been the kid from the champ?

And that was... Where's that kid now? then that led to Bagpipes Kid from Crocodile Tears. What do you think Bagpipe's kid was? What was happening with the bagpipes? It sounds like he played him. I don't know. It sounds like this memorable hysterical scene,

but I don't know what could have. I have no idea. Was Crocodile Tears a comedy or a drama? It'd be great if it was just like consenting adults. Was it like Curly Sue? Like a Home Alone type movie? Or was it? I always felt like it was like a Kramer versus Kramer?

type tragedy. I thought more of like a bad news bears kind of a thing. What do you think it was, Craig? Crocodile Tears. Gotta go comedy. It's got to be like a classic like kids.

Like a kid's comedy? Yeah. Like the sandlot? Like that kind of movie. Like a school of rock or something. Yeah. Yeah. Morewood's stage the best.

I love her children novels. The boy with a nub for an arm. It's just good high comedy. So this seems like ridiculous at the time. But as somebody who has purchased and read many, many books for kids in the last few years,

few years. It's kind of where we are right now. Yeah. You know, this is not so far afield from what a lot of children's books are like. And Rubin says, well, it's very graphic for a children's novel and they cut to the picture. It's just somebody missing arm in the arms next to the fireworks. What's age of the best? St. Bart's as a movie location. Great call. We don't have enough movies where they're just like, we're going to St. Bart's, Hawaii. We're going to the Bahamas.

This is your favorite thing about the Happy Madison Productions. You know, this is what Sandler does. And he did it. He's a genius. What's the Aniston Sandler movie that your family loves? Just go with it? Just go with it. What's the Aniston Sandler movie?

Come on. It's like, what's that De Niro boxing movie with the Sorsese did? What's that one call? What's that called? Yep, that's great comp. Yeah, I've said this before, but during COVID, we just went all locations when my family was watching movies. That was nice. I like that idea.

Let's go somewhere. Where are we going today? Hawaii. That was me, but we're just rewatching the hackman scenes in the firm. The concept of Risk Master? Yeah. I think it's just good. I liked it.

I like that he's just constantly assessing risk because that's his job. Yeah, I mean, my wife is an actuary. Like, this is not so far afield from what she does. So I wouldn't say she's quite as anxious as Rubin is in this movie, but it's a type. You've got to have a certain skill set to do this work. We have 29% of the people here are over 70 at this wedding. Okay, so I'll wait. I'll wait.

Oh, I had that actually as a wood stage the best. I know that I have a 0.03% chance of being hit by a car on my way home or a 1 in 46,000 chance of falling through a subway grate. I think that's true? I was wondering the same thing. Is that data accurate? 1 in 46, that doesn't seem like I never walk on subway grates. I know, but we have that iconic image of Maryland and Roe, you know?

Right. Coglin's in this movie. My guy. Huge W. playing some version of Rupert Murdoch crossed with Coglin meets Coglin Yeah

Well I'm speaking of anyone but you Coglin also featured in anyone but you Young Flanagan My best friend in the world Fucking love Coglin Should we re-cocktail? We should re-coctail Maybe that's what we should do for the Live YouTube

Ringer Movies thing If we ever launch a channel If there is a re-cobstail We will re-coctail That sounds great. One of the great movies of all time. Kelly Lynch. Seven minutes a cocktail?

You'd have to go TGI Fridays for the seven minutes. Yeah, I think so. I think so. The demonstration. Crowded bar in New York City. Nobody wants to drink. Totally happy to see these two guys

work their magic. Totally. It was great to see Coglin. Married to Rachel Ward, one of the hottest actresses of all time. Beautiful. Against all odds. Another one will be doing on the rewatchables and some.

Points. In the feed, we might be able to get to 350 movies. Fingers crossed. It's all up to you, Bill. Jesus Christ Superstar Rehearsals. Uh-huh. This is what's age the best? What's age the best when the kid goes, I thought I was playing Judas, and it's Judas.

And I'm playing both of them. I think that's... He's playing Jesus and Judas in the rehearsals. Yeah, that's Masi Oka, who would be one of the stars of heroes. Remember, he was a huge star of heroes. Oh, good call. Sandy Lyleau, I just love that guy. Ruben's theory on bar food treats his age their best.

I felt this way for years. I don't go near the giant bowl of anything. But you just flipped my what's age the worst, which is bar snacks. Like, now you don't, when you go to bars in L.A. now, they bring you your individual tray of bar snacks. You can order like Tarale for $11 because they no longer put out.

If you go to a dive, obviously they'll have pretzels or whatever. But if you go to like a medium scale, bar. It's all individual snacks. Yeah, they want to protect you. And then you go home and have unprotected sex. That's the irony of that whole thing. That's that's, uh, impromptu, impromptu base jumps always works in a movie. That's a good one. Yeah. I've never seen a movie where somebody's on top of a building and they might jump and you're like, I'm going to go get some popcorn. Is that like a shout out to FX, the Brian Brown film or something? Yeah, might have been. Yeah, might have been.

the fighting off premature ejaculation, which could be another series for a rewatchable's month. Less than seven minutes. Counting down and he's like, 55, 54, 50! I love the scene later in that movie where Jennifer Anson's talking to Missy Pyle

and she's like, isn't normal for a guy to just scream 50 at the orgasms? And she's like, yeah, it is. Like, she has experience. And then the only other one, it just makes me laugh when he finds out when he decides to confront Javier. the salsa guy and the thing

and he's like, everything okay, Rubin? And he's like, no, actually, me, no, not este, too good, Javier. I think when people mix English and Spanish in comedies, it always makes me laugh. Ben Stiller's whole comic persona is, I'm the dipshit.

Yeah. So it works in this situation. Dennett thieves, Benjana, where it's seen stealing locations, St. Barts. This just look great. Where would you go? I'm trying to go.

If there's any other locations. You go, Grimy, New York. I mean, that Indian restaurant is very recognizable to me. I'm sure I had a dinner there with my mom at some point. The Kid Cuddy pursued a happiness award for Best Needle Drop. They just dropped Lost Cause by Beck, which... It plays well. It's a song that I always forget how much I like it.

And it makes me just think like I just should have spent more time with that song. That's a great one. It's in that typical moment that comes in every movie like this where there's 28 minutes left. Something bad has happened. They broke up. It's never going to work out. Or he screwed up. Yeah.

Yeah, it's like 24 minutes left. Yeah, yeah. Somewhere between 28 and 24 minutes left. There's a bunch of like very memorable needle drops, though. Like there's a black-eyed pea song in this movie in the gap playing in the gallery. There's some salsa. Yeah. Yeah, there's a let's do it again by the staple singers.

That's a great one in this movie. Some good, good music. Big Cooner Burger where best use of food and drink has to be the Moroccan dinner with the stick your hands. It looks disgusting. Not the pizza? Oh, it should be the pizza grease. You're right. Pizza grease wins. You're right.

Good call. Great check order award. Most cinematic shot. We don't have CR. Sierra's not in this country. Sierra would have been here. Yeah, we miss him. Come back, Chris.

You think he's going to stay? You know, I have been planning if he doesn't come back. Just in case. It would hurt his feelings the most. Gosh, I'm trying to think of what's the most Philly movie imaginable. I mean, it'd be rocky, but I don't think he cares about that one. No, I also don't know how much Chris likes Philly. Wow.

Dubious of that. That's tricky territory. Who leaves during the NBA playoffs when you have a 30-year-old former MVP center, and you never know what you're getting every year. And Chris is like, I'll see you guys later and going to Europe. You got to ask Sierra that one. What if we just for heat? Which one?

For heat? For heat, me, you, De Niro, and Pacino? I want to do heat with Bert Reynolds. I just think we have to bang that out. I've been thinking about that because it's been on and I'm like, be amazing to do heat. You mean the 80s, Bert Reynolds movie called Heat? 1986, Bert Reynolds, where he actually punched out the director and got sued.

I thought you'd make... That's a half hour. Record the movie Heat with Bert Reynolds as a guest. No. Well, that would be good, too, when he's dead. No, he filmed a movie called Heat in 86, and he punched a director who then sued him, and it put Bert's career in shambles.

It was already on the Wayne at that time. But he's also, it's a movie set in Vegas, and he's wearing a shark-skin suit the whole time. Incredible content. Yeah, and then he did Malone, which is, I think, worse. I can't remember one of them's worse than the other, but the boat back. Maloney's like an assassin or like that.

Yeah. Yeah. No, he goes to a small town. That's right. It's one of those movies. That's right. And it's the girl from Youngblood. I don't know

Yeah Okay Great shock order a word We don't have CR But I think it's the overhead shot When Hoffman says I'm so horny So I was going to say The Sasquatch Slow Mo on Stiller

Getting in the guy's stomach With the sweat No you're right That has to be it right That's and then it keeps going And it's got the Stiller is doing the work in that scene And he's spitting the guy's sweat out

Yeah it's great The Butch's Girlfriend Award for Weeklink of the film. What do you have for this? Hmm. I have one if you don't have one. Is there somebody who's not up to snuff in this movie? No, the Weeklink is the risk assessment list, Polly versus Lisa, is just directly ripped off from season two friends when Ross is dating the girl he brought back from China or whatever.

Right. He makes the list. The pros and cons. And Chandler and Joey are like, you got to make a list and figure out he makes a list. And, of course, Rachel finds the list. And it becomes one of the most traumatic moments in the history of NBC.

It's the same idea. Yeah. With Jennifer Aniston, finding the list. I always thought that was super weird that they did that. Question for John Hamburg, I think. Yeah. That's a tricky one.

And only like four or five years after that happened. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's tough. What's age the worst? I mean, E. True Hollywood story, they don't have that anymore, right? So that's age the worst in a weird way, just because they don't exist.

You could also say it's age the best because I used to really enjoy it. It's a great time capsule. Also, the joke is so magnificent when he reveals that he hired those guys himself to shoot his own. I'm all in on the joke. I'm just saying the concept of that show. What is E.TRA Hollywood story now? Now it's just like Instagram. Craig, what do 12-year-olds know about E.

True Hollywood Story? Too busy being sad? Yeah, we're on TikTok. What's age the worst? Ben still are running. Not, you don't believe it. On a scale of one to cruise, I have a man at 3.5.

That's good. How about Hoffman's running, you know, when he's kind of circling the perimeter looking for the open shot? I love Hoffman. We mentioned bar snacks. So, this story bummed me out.

This was in one of the, Hamburg's done some interviews about this movie, and he said, several years later, after an NYU alumni screening in the movie, remembers walking home with Hoffman through Greenwich Village. As they talked, Hoffman recalled being initially frustrated

by fans recognizing him on the street and shouting, Let it rain. By then he'd won an Oscar and he'd worked with prestigious directors. Blah, blah, blah. Why was he still being recognized as the sharding, brick throwing, Sandy Lyle? I think he wrestled with that for a little while, Hamburg says, I didn't like that Phil Hoffman

was upset that he was in this movie. Oh, you know, famously complicated guy, and a little bit tortured. I think he's like liked doing stuff like this, but then also didn't like dealing with the ramifications of being in the public eye very often. Tortured artists in a lot of ways. He's just walking to get a pizza and somebody's like, what chocolate? That's the other thing is that he's a New York guy. He's from the state of New York.

He also is very believable in a New York movie. But yeah, if you're a famous person in New York and you want to spend time on the street, sometimes people are going to talk about how you shard it. in a movie, you know. These are the breaks. Ruffalo, Hannah Rubinick-Parcher, overacting word. They knew, and they let it happen. Don't you call me, lady! I come in here,

I give these things to you. Give it all you got! Give it all you got! I treated you like a son! You fucking stand me in the heart! Fuck you! Ben Stiller's salsa dance. He's dialed it up way too high in that one. Not a huge fan of that scene.

Yeah, I don't like that scene that much. Was there a better title for this movie? Hamburg said initially they were going to call it Sorry About Your Wife Because remember he comes back from the honeymoon And it's like sorry about your wife And that was the title And they decided it was a little too much of a bummer

I think that would have been less commercial But more accurate Sorry about your wife Yeah I feel like a long came Polly Is kind of a weird sweet title For a movie that isn't that sweet I agree it's also confusing

With something about Mary along came Polly But it feels like that's what they're going for right. They're almost trying to draw you into I think I like sorry about your wife. It's good. Yeah, it's good. It feels more like, you know, there's an aspect of this movie that is very much like a kind of like a 70s comedy with George Siegel or something that you could see it feels very similar to that kind of a thing

and along came Polly is not what that movie, one of those movies would have been called. The CR thinks Luke Wilson could have been Harrison for it. How to Take a Word? I think there's like four other people from this decade I would have rather wanted it in this movie than Ben Stiller. And I like Ben Steylor. I just feel like he played this character one too many times This to me and it's too early for him It's a Paul Rudd movie but he's not Paul Rudd yet

It's like in 2009 He's too handsome Paul Rudd You wouldn't believe Debra Messing cheating on him In the way that you would believe Stiller Cheating Is Paul Rudd that handsome? I think so

Is he not? I never thought about Paul Rudd as like a Casanova I think that is the hottest take right there. Do you... I think he's a 10? He's a 10? Paul Rudd?

I don't know if I'm qualified to weigh in on whether he's a 10 or not, but I think he's considered a handsome man. He plays the prince in Romeo and Julie. But I think the point is that guy, Hank Azaire is packing heat to the point that nobody has a chance. You think it was just completely dick-related?

Yeah, I do. Wow. She stared at it for three minutes. Like, is Paul Rudd in the same category to you as like Patrick Dempsey? No. He's not. He's not.

He's on like the Jason Bateman level, which was the other guy I was thinking for this. Could this have been a Jason Bateman? Bateman, I would believe. Rudd, I don't, Rudd is not, anxiety is not the foremost trait that you get from Rudd. Whereas with Bateman and Schiller, he's chill. Yeah. But here's where I landed for who this should have been.

Okay. Mike Myers. Yeah. He could have pulled this off. This is the, So I married an expert or Mike Myers. I like this version of Mike Myers. And he didn't make a. enough of these movies and Ben Stowe were made too many.

Mike Myers only made one. Right. He just made so I married an expert. Ben Stowe made seven. So we could have just flipped that seesaw. I do think Mike Myers could have been aided by not trying to be Peter Sellers all the time.

Yeah. It would have been nice. Do you have a hottest take in honor of CR? I move into Europe. I, uh, Debra Messing is a super weird celebrity now, but in this movie I was like, yeah.

Maybe Deborah Messing over Jennifer Anderson? Is that crazy? Obviously, she cheated on him. That's not ideal. but she's pretty appealing in St. Bart's. Bitchy Deborah Messing is the most I've ever liked Deborah Messing. Pretty, pretty hot.

Yeah. I don't know. I liked everything about what she, I liked her in the wedding scenes. I liked when she came back. Yeah, that's an interesting one where could they have just flipped her and Aniston in this movie?

What's the movie? Hmm. I don't think you can quite do. It would be more believable that Aniston would leave Stiller because she'd be like, I'm above you on the first. food chain, you know.

I'm glad you brought that up. I really like messing in this movie. Casting what ifs couldn't find any. Best that guy award, Missy Pyle. How many people know she's Missy Pyle? I don't know, but this is the, this is exactly what she does well. Two scenes, the best friend,

gets at least two funny lines in the movie. Did you know her name was Missy Pyle? No, but I immediately recognized her. She wins Best That Guy. I didn't, I actually didn't know her name until I was doing the IMDB research on it. This movie has a bunch of people who were that guys at the time, who emerged. There's one Kevin Hart scene. Yeah. There's one Cheryl Hines scene.

There's one of Judah Friedlander who was being 30 Rock. There's like a handful of people here like, oh yeah. Wow. Why is Cheryl Hines just playing the angry catering manager? Yeah, it was like a scene got cut. Kevin Hart looks so young in this movie. He looks like Kevin Hart's son playing the camera man. Yeah. And this is before 40-year-old Virgin, right? Yeah. When he has the incredible scene in Best Buy. Really tough Deon Waiters Award, which I think speaks to competitive quality of this movie.

Because we have Hank Azaria. The accent work for you 100%. I think it worked. I think it's funny. Baldwin, accent definitely. Luban. Brian Brown. Yep.

Roxanne, the waitress we just mentioned. And then I want to make a case for Ruben's mom. Who's in like two scenes. She used to be Michelle Lee. She used to be on Dallas. She, seven minutes played eight of nine from three. I'm going to ask this nice Native American man to get us a table. Can we get table?

That seems unbelievable. I think she wins. On the one hand, it's like a great joke because it's about like an older generation entering like a PC world and trying to be thoughtful but not having the tools to do it. On the other hand, didn't this woman like live in New York her whole life? How could she not understand? funny. I think she wins. She's pretty funny. It's either her or Baldwin. I mean, the Baldwin probably, most people would say, oh, Hank has to win, but I don't know.

Baldwin's good. What does he say? I knew she was a dime store hooker from the moment I met her? Yes. Want to give it to Baldwin? Let's give it to Baldwin. I love Baldwin in this movie. Stan and Dursky. Recasting couch or director or city. So I'm just going to give you some names for the Jennifer Aniston part. Just for thought experiment. Okay. Gwyneth Paltrow.

2004, Gwyneth Paltrow. Didn't she do shallow hell in 2004? Would you rather she did this? Yes, definitively, yes. Again, Genif, Gwyneth Paltrow has an unrelatable quality that I think would have made this a little bit of a harder part for her. Okay. Like, I think Jennifer Addson's good at being a girl who's like,

yeah, I move around a lot, and I can't really commit to things, and I'm a little all over the place. Whereas Gwyneth Paltrow is like a perfectly manicured human being. This is really a 1992 Meg Ryan part. It's Meg Ryan. I'm not sleepless in Seattle, Meg Ryan. I'm going to get a little goofy. My hair's be little weird.

I'm going to be flighty. Totally. And that's, Meg Ryan was a one-on-one. So that's a hard one to fill of those shoes. But I'll give you a couple more. Okay. Winona Ryder. I think she was having some issues at this point,

but there's the reality bites 10 years later. I could see her. She's a little older, a little flightier. Yep. Maybe some bad decisions and some miles on the odometer that you could see in the character. I thought she could have worked. You know who I thought about was like a mid-90s Gina Davis a little bit too? Oh.

You know, because she played, you know, accidental tourists. Like a quick change. Yeah, yeah, exactly. That era. Katie Holmes, no. But I always wanted to see Katie Holmes in a movie like this before she got cruised. She never really recaptured why. guys like me were infatuated with Joey, you know, from Dawson's.

Never did it. She never really, like, hit that in the movies. She never had a movie like this. Yeah. Why not? Why was she not a romantic comedy star? I guess she did do a few romantic comedies, but nothing that ever worked. Maybe the auditions didn't work.

I liked her and go. She thought she was good. Great and go. Go is another one. See, we make it to 360 movies. Doug Lyman. Lyman. Limania.

Two more choices. Our girl Heather Graham. I think she could have done it. She's extremely. hot. I know. Like, in a way that it is like almost weird. Overpowers the movie. Yeah.

Okay. She's Felicity Shagwell at this time, you know? She's not. All right, well, I'm going to give you the winner. Michelle Williams. It's coming out of Dawson Creek. She plays older. She's a year away from being broke back mountains. I just like, I always wanted

to see Michelle Williams in a movie like this. Why does she always have to be in movies where the most traumatic things possible are happening to her? It's a great take. I don't know. It's like, oh, my husband's going fishing again with Jack Twist. Great. You're going to be going for two days again, huh?

Um, what about... Let's have her in a happy movie where she's eating Moroccan food and, you know, hanging out with Phil Hoffman. Julie Louis-Dreyfus? Too old at this point, 04? It's... Seven years after Seinfeld, six years after Seinfeld?

What about... That's not a bad one. Well, what if we just did a friend swap? And it was Courtney Cox. I... No. No, just didn't know. No, I don't think.

I actually think Lisa Kudrow would have been more realistic, but she's probably too old. Talk about who never really made it happen in the movies. Yeah. But this brings my point. The Meg Ryan part is really hard. Let's take a break, and then we'll do Tony Romer or Chris Collinsworth. Are you looking for support in your weight management journey? Zepbound terseptitide may be able to help.

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Pick up fees may apply. All right, come back. Tony Rumor or Chris Collinsworth, the director's commentary. I was actually thinking this is a good Collinsworth one. Oh, oh, Al. He got the luf out, Al. He's trying to clean that toilet. Oh, look at this.

I love bathroom humor, Al. I was thinking of doing the basketball, the basketball scene too. Oh, ow, he's making it rain, Al. Look at that Sasquatch, Al. That guy's so hairy. I do think Romo could do, like, you know. He's reaching for the cloth, Jim. Jim, he flushed the cloth.

I was thinking of the boat. Oh, he's going to go on the boat, Jim. He's not going to like what he's going to see, Jim. Oh, he had their flippers on, Jim. Huge cock at heck is here, Jim. Something like a tripod. Debra's loving it, Jim. Half as internet research.

The ferret did bite. Ben still are a couple times during production. Oh. What did you think about the one moment when he was like, should I wipe with the ferret? It did make my wife go, no, he's not going to use the ferret.

That's good. I like that. The building that Leland Van Loo, which we should have been West Age the best, the name Leland Van Loo. Yeah. That was our original choice

if I had a son. We would have gone Leland Van Lue Fennettnessy. I like it. That was the AT&T Tower, which is 611 West 6th Street. Not that far from the spot. office. That was down here. Yeah. So maybe the movie wasn't filmed in New York. Maybe I've got that wrong.

No, I think they just filmed that here. Oh, okay. So this is, I'm just going to read, because again, Hamburg for some reason gave a bunch of different interviews about this movie, but this is him talking about the boardroom scene. Mm-hmm. And he said, I had rewritten it the night before, and Hoffman had come from more of a theater background and dramas where you don't change the script, whereas I came from comedy where you're constantly writing. So it was my fault. He's basically saying Hoffman couldn't get the thing.

Okay. Couldn't figure out his character for the boardroom scene. We broke for lunch. Alec Baldwin sat with him and did some sort of magic trick. He talked to him, actor to actor, something I couldn't do. And Phil came back after lunch, and it's the entire performance you see in the movie. I was just like, oh, I'm watching one of the great actors of our generation to do this monologue. It was just magic.

He was so relieved and I was so relieved and so appreciative of Alec for looking out for a fellow actor. Alck Baldwin. I'm still in. I'm buying everybody's Alk Baldwin's stock. I'm in. Give you your stock.

Yeah. Can you trade stocks when you're in prison? I don't know. I'm not saying it's an expensive stock. Yeah. The sweaty guy

in the basketball scene, they had to lather his chest with a glycerin solution that looked like sweat. And then they had him jumping into a trampoline and landing in the Stiller's face

so it could smack against it and they did 12 takes. Never say Ben Stiller doesn't want it. He really wants it. He wants it. He wants it. Apex Mountain. Ben Steller, no. No. Aniston.

What is Ben Stiller's Apex Mountain? I mean, it's got to be Meet the Parents. Wow. Yeah. Are you on Meet the Parents? Yeah, it's on the list. Didn't Hamburg co-write that? I think he did. Yeah.

That's how they, he worked with Steller a bunch. Yeah. You wrote a lot of those movies. Not Zoolander? I don't think so. No, it's meet the parents because it's coming off of there's something by Mary

then meet the parents. Then he can do whatever we want. Okay. Aniston, no. Hoffman, no, but I think we're getting close. Capote to Mission Impossible 3. Yep.

Spanking, no. Deborah Messing, probably yes. What year did Will & Grace start? It's in the 2000s. Remember when like 29 million people watched Will & Grace? I wasn't one of them? I never watched one moment of it.

I still don't know what the plot was. You don't know what the plot was? Was she Will or Grace? She was Grace. I'm kidding. I know she was. So that show ran from... It's like 98 or something.

98 through 2006. Wow. I missed every episode. Komodo Dragons, Apex Mountain? No. Ben Stiller bathroom mishaps in a movie. No. White chocolate.

Is it Jason Williams? No. It's Jay Will. It's got to be. White chocolate was a problem. Yeah, he was a problem. He really was a problem. He really was a problem.

What about, where did he go after Sacramento and he was like, he's, oh, the heat. It was like he's playing the game the right way now. Memphis. He went Memphis and Miami. Yeah. Throw pillows, possible Apex Mountain. I hate throw pillows, big passion of my mom.

She loves a throw pillow. Loves throw pillows and wine. How many pillows are on your bed right now? On my bed? Yeah. Less than 10. I'll tell you right now, it's six on mine. Six.

We've got a king-sized bed. Yeah. Two, two, two. I think that's the math. No throw pillows. They're like the big pillows. They're like heavy pillow and then a regular pillow. Big pillow, regular pillow.

Big pillow, regular pillow. That's the math. You don't need more than that. You probably don't need that many. Six is good. My mom is giant pillow, throw pillow. The mini throw, when people do the mini throw pillows, you're just a sociopath at that point. No, you should be jailed.

Yeah. IBS? Possible. Possible. Just for all living humans in a movie. Yeah. Possible.

It was early stage IBS. Jimmy Kimmel was the first person I'd ever met who had IBS. I've heard him talk about a lot. Did work with him and he was in the bathroom working in his monologue and toilet for a half hour,

talking to him through the door. So that was my first IBS experience. He's talked about it. I'm not telling secrets. Yeah, that's great. Salsa? That was me not. commenting on Jimmy Kimmel's IBS.

Good non-comment. Salsa. There's probably been better salsa moments. There's probably been better moments of the ferret. Salsa is like, I don't know, like, save the last dance or dirty dancing or something like that. Hippo monologues, probably, yes. I don't remember. You think this is the number one hippo monologue of all time?

Yeah. You must be like the hippo. Hippo. All right, it's time. Wow. Cruiser, Hanks. This is the best category in the podcast now. This is the toughest one we've had.

Each one I've had a lien. I think you can make a case for both. I think Hanks absolutely could have played this, but I think Cruz trying to play Rubin. The answer always seems to be it's so much funnier if Cruz plays blank. That's it. Because Hanks could have made this movie in 1995.

He could have been Rubin in 1995. I think the answer is Hanks. But... Why would Tom Cruise be Rubin? Tom Cruise as Rubin is iconic. He would just... never have done it. He never wants to be the loser in a movie.

He wouldn't have done it. Hanks would have happily done it. Maybe that's what's been missing from Cruz's last decade is John Hamburg. The comic stylings of John Hamburg. What do you think, Craig? We have to decide what this category is. Cruz or Hanks?

We've never decided what he affects now. Better movie? Better movie? Well, what is better? It's Tom Hanks. It's Hanks. Hanks is the answer. Does better mean more believable? Because if it's, if the answer is funnier movie to us, Cruz wins every single movie. It's always going to be funnier with Cruz. But better movies is a different one.

But that is the, that's the decider in the great argument of this show. That every movie is more enjoyable with Tom Cruise. But Cruz couldn't have been in like saving private right. He absolutely could have. He just wouldn't have been as good as Tom Hanks. Maybe so, but he could have been in it. And there are so many Tom Cruise movies that Tom Hanks could never do. Hanks wins this one.

We're tied at four. Thanks hold back to Eva. I felt my thumb on the... I think it's four three. I think it's four three crews. You sure? I think so. I'll double check.

I think it's four three. Craig, if you noticed Bill keeps doing Tom Cruise movies on their watchables without me? Yeah. What do you think is going on there? We talk about this behind the scenes.

What do you think's happening in there? You can be in the next one. Because Bill feels compelled to do cruise movies because they're so special. We've done 15. I know. They're great. There's the 20 more.

Racehorse, rock band, wrestler or fantasy team name Crocodile Tears works for all of them. Crocodile Tears, good fantasy football name. Could see Hyfitts calling his team Crocodile Tears. I'll let them out. Yeah. What about Al Hafez?

It's not an ethic place. It's called Al Hafez. Picking Nits. I mean, nobody lets their wife go scuba diving with a French guy with a giant crank who lifts her up and brings her to the boat to start off the scuba daven day.

Do you wear those speedos when you go to St. Barts? What's your speedo? Not only do I not wear the speedos. To me, it's a character test. Oh, wow. You need a man wearing a leopard-price stito. I'm out. Out.

That's such a weird move. Who does that? Well, it's very French. It's weird. Okay. All right. Should I throw away all my speedos? Would CR do it?

He's probably wearing one right now. He's in Europe, right? It's probably on the beaches of Greece. Speedo. Yeah, they luxuriating. a cheetah-print speedo. I could see Van Lathen wearing one. Absolutely.

With a cowboy hat. Yeah, absolutely. Totally. We mentioned no way Rubin goes up to her place on first date with diarrhea in the works. Nip-pick. The poop date's going to be it for them. She's not calling again after the poop date. I mean, after watching him sweat his way through that meal, she'd be like, nice seeing you again.

Farewell. They would not be going to. going back to her apartment after that. He's disgusting. Yeah. It's a deal breaker. I have one more giant picket nick, but do you have any? I think the whole premise doesn't,

it's not, they would never, I know opposite's tracked, but they just, the whole thing would just collapse in on itself the whole time. The whole time I was watching the movie, I was like, they're not any of the issue. Why is she into this? Yeah. What is the case?

And there's even that scene where she's talking to Missy Pyle about it. And she's like, this feels like a sympathy thing. and she's like, no, no, no, I like him, and you don't really buy it. Agree. Here's my biggest picket. There's no fucking Knicks game in this movie. You've Ben Stiller and you have Philip Seymour Hoffman, two of the most famous Knicks fans. Huge Knicks fans.

Ben Stowe has banned at all these games. If Philip Seymour Hoffman was alive, God rest his soul, he would have been at every one of these games. Yep. They couldn't have worked like Sandy and Rubin at a Knicks game talking about Polly? What the fuck? we could have gotten, think of who we could have gotten in the 2003 Knicks. What a mess, that would have been.

Yeah, that would have been difficult. Who was on the 2003 Knicks? I'm going to look this up. But we could have had this awesome 2003 Knicks scene with the legs of... That's right before Marbury, right? So they would have had to film it, what fall at 2003.

So that would have been, we had three coaches that year, Sean. Don Cheney, Herb Williams, and Lenny Wilkins. Yeah. Oh, you had to do. Vin Baker, Howard Isley, Alan Houston was still on the team. The Allen Houston contract was still in the team.

Tim Thomas? Kurt Thomas. Penny Hardaway. I guess Keith Van Horn was on that team, Antonio McDice? Jesus. Steph got traded. Step got traded during that season.

In 03 to 040. Yeah. I don't know what they were doing. The biggest miss, just the all-time layup, and we had basketball earlier in the movie. put Philip C. Moheroffin. What jersey is he wearing in that scene? Oakley? No, Anthony Mason. Yeah. Anthony Mason. No question. Yeah. Good call. Can I add one small picking knit? Yeah.

So Jennifer Anderson's character is a waitress. It doesn't appear she has a ton of money. She bought a $200 lufa? I think that's a character note that the reason that she's a waitress is because she does dumb shit like buying $200 lufus. Okay. See, this is how I can tell Craig never waited or bartendered. I was a host at a Mexican restaurant in high school. When you're getting that money, it becomes like monopoly. Where you have like three good nights around your day.

That was when I bought like, that was when I bought my giant TV. I'm like, oh my God, I made $600 this week. And all of a sudden I was at any job where you get paid in cash, you think you're richer than you are. It's like drug money. I didn't even know there were $200 lufas available that were being made. I'm not sure that there were necessarily. It's like having, like it's,

It's like being in a fantasy draft where you just have money. Are they, yeah, I'm going to get Marvin Harris a junior for 48. That's me paying $26 from Malachi Corley in September. That's definitely going to happen. Did you do that? I probably will. Oh, this September. Yeah, I'm going to be like, this guy's going to be Aaron Rogers' number one target.

I also just want to say Malachi Corley as often as I can. Is he really going to start for the Jets? I think he's going to play out of the slot. Wow. Would you rather have Alan Lazard in the slot? I don't think so. I would not. Sequel, prequel, prestige, TBL, Blackcast, are untouchable.

All Blackcast is kind of a fun premise for this. This is one that I feel like they could have remade. Okay, so who is it? Kevin Hart. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Who is it?

Oh, wait, 2004 or 2024? Yeah, 2004. It's, uh, Taye Diggs plays Hankas area. It's just pick anybody. Nealong. Oh, yeah, Tay Diggs. Yeah, knee along. It's Nealong and Vivica A. Fox is Deborah Messing.

Nealong is Jennifer Aniston. Gosh, who else is in this movie? Who's like, Cedric the Entertainer is Sandy Lyle. Who else? This movie sounds great. Could be a funny movie. Yeah, that's... Who plays the parents?

It's like Ozzie Davis is the dad and he gets the one speech and he's got Gravitas. Yeah. Yeah, I think this would be a good movie. It's like David Allen Greer's here somewhere. Absolutely. He's in Derski. Yeah, he's in Derski.

Great, we did it. Is this movie better with Wayne Jenkins, Danny Traos, Sam Jackson, J.T. Walsh. Byron Mayo, Harley-Mays, evil laughing, Ramon Raymond or Philip Baker Hall. I actually have Ramon Raymond for this one as in the salsa scene. He just comes in, like, what are you doing, Romano? He's Hobbier?

Yeah, okay. That's good. That's pretty good. I couldn't even possibly fathom trying to do Bernthal, so I won't. Just want to ask her who gets it. Clearly, Hoffman. Here's your best supporting actors for that year, just for the hell of it.

Okay. Morgan Freeman wins for Million Dollar Baby, a movie that should be shot into the sun and eviscerated and burned. Okay. It's a very reasonable opinion. Even for Rock Bottom Month,

we were like, fuck off. Who's we? Me, me in the committee. Alan Aldo for the Aviator? That's a weird one. Literally don't remember what his part was.

I like the Aviator, but I don't mean. So that spot's open. Thomas Hayden Church and Sideways great. Great one. Jamie Fox and Collateral. I'm fine with it.

good. Why wasn't Cruz nominated there? Is Cruz the star? Isn't Jamie Fox the star of collateral? I mean, Jamie Fox was the star of collateral. He's in... He's nominated for Best Supporting Actor? Yeah. The Oscars. That's weird. Weird. Clive Owen for Clive

Oh, my briefcase. Cruz, the man. Clive Owen in closer is Larry Gray. Pretty sure we could redo that one. I kind of like Closer. Also could have been Rock Bottom Month. Some tough times in closer. I feel like Hoffman could have snuck in there.

Imagine if he got nominated for this. He's like, what? And they showed the sharding scene and hit the Oscar clip. Probably in answerable questions. Was Philip Sumer Hoffman actually good at basketball? I think there's signs that he was. So there's a coordination that you could tell he's intentionally tanking the shooting. He's in a really sad movie called Love Liza.

And there's a scene in that movie where he shoots hoops alone in a gym. And you can tell, like, he kind of knows. he's doing. Yeah. I saw Love Eliza. Yeah. It's pretty depressing. He made a couple depressing ones. Owning Mahoney. It's a tough one. Some sad ones. Yeah. The savages, it's a sad one. So this is actually a debate

on the internets. Did this movie invent sharding? Had anyone ever thought of the word sharting before? I think a man had sharded before. That's something I can confirm. Sharding had happened. Had anyone ever called it a shart. My career has been leading to this moment. The theory was... The theory was sharding existed pre-movie, but this popularized the shart.

Absolutely. I mean, cavemen, they sharded, of course. The actual name sharding. Somebody's saying, I sharded. Did John Hamburg coined the term? Sharder. That's the debate. I would say maybe he didn't invent it, but that it had been in the ether.

It had been in the world. That's how I feel. It had been in fraternities. It had been in the universe of discussion, and he popularized it. It's like how I invented Las Vegas, the modern Las Vegas. It's the same thing. When I started going. Same thing for John Hamburg and sharding.

I have your back 100% on that. Thank you. Appreciate it. So Hamburg says something here in one of the many interviews he did about this movie. And I just wanted to talk about it with you. You were really grinding tape on this one. Yeah. I went through the Hamburg interviews.

I love it. I really do. I really like this movie. He said, I think some movies, if you have a bath, You have a true uphill battle to get good reviews. I just feel like some people can't see beyond that and can't look at it like, oh, this is a real life situation. We've all been in these situations. Does a bathroom scene automatically drop you by like a star?

It's an interesting concept. Critically. Like would Ebert have given this a three if there was no bathroom scene? But isn't there something about Mary critically acclaimed? True. So that's where Hamburg's theory falls apart. So I feel like actually it's shit. If there's a scene where shit is in the movie,

that kills it? Down a star. Best double future choice with this movie? Would you go another Ben Stiller movie or would you go another funny Hoffman movie? So neither. I would do the original The Heartbreak Kid. Oh. With Charles Groden and Sybil Shepard,

which is a masterpiece, Elaine May movie. Yeah. That is very funny and has a very similar setup. And also is about like discomfort and weirdness and anxiety. I like that movie. It's really funny. That was one of those classic, why are we making this? Who wants this?

The original is perfect. And the new one kind of misunderstood what made the first one so perfect, but whatever. The Indian Reds the Wadne Award, what happened the next day? Hamburg says they never got married but started a family and they're with their kids surfing in Costa Rica. Is there any chance Deborah Messing me to come back there? Or she popped in one night. It was like, hey, still thinking about you? My take is they last like four more weeks

And maybe he does end up with Deborah Messing Is it Polly's fault or is it Rubin's fault? I just don't know how good of a hang Rubin was Did not seem very good It's like, oh, you learn a salsa with Javier for me Is Ben Stiller the most successful actor of all time At Playing Guys the Year? Like, I don't think I want to hang out with that guy.

Yeah, he's a rough hang. Who is he? Seems like a nice guy in real life. No, but the characters he picks They're always, but I think that's why he picks them. Like, meet the parents. He's a nurse and that becomes a running joke. There's always some form of weakness that somebody can pick a scab with them.

That's his move. What piece of memorabilia would you want from this movie? There's clearly one answer. The game used basketball from Hoffman in the rain dance. Craig told me before we started recording the lufa, that's what he wanted. $200 lufa? Yeah, game used. Okay.

Coach Finstock award for Best Life Lesson. Well, it's got to be the father's speech, right? Enjoy the ride. Just like you told me in 2012. And then who won the movie? Hoffman. Do you think that would... Were people saying that in 2004

that Phil Hoffman won this movie? I don't know because I didn't see the movie until it was on cable and Hoffman was the thing that jumped out of me right away. I would have thought actually they probably felt like Aniston having a hit was probably the winner initially, right? Yeah, no, that's a thing.

good call. It's like, oh, Anniston, finally she did it. Yeah. And her name and the title of the movie, and yeah, she's on the poster and it's sold on her. Oh, maybe she can be a rom-com star. Yeah, yeah. But now, now it's clearly Hoffman. All right, what did you think, Craig? I hadn't seen this in a long time. I can't remember the first time I saw it, and it kind of just lives in clips now because I think of the Hoffman scene. Yeah, like, if you look at other 04 comedies, it's like around then Anchorman and a 40-year-old Virgin and like old school. I don't think it's on that level. It's definitely like a B comedy compared to it. But it's really enjoyable. It's almost like a great background comedy now.

But if this movie came out today, I would be afraid that it, I don't know, it would just get buried and nobody would be able to find it. I think one thing that was so nice about 2004 was like because of the lack of competition and like the, for like people's attention, this movie. This movie just had time to like breathe and it was on cable and everybody was always constantly being reminded about this movie. It's like if there were only 100 movies on Netflix, maybe no hard feelings would be a huge hit because it would just be one of the only things you could want. watch. And I think that's kind of why this movie has endured because from 04 to 14, they're just like, I don't know, you were on cable and this was on all the time. And so you could just like see it more. And now no hard feelings will be buried amongst 10,000 other movies every day, even though it might just be, it might be just as good. I have a pop quiz for you guys related to

the point that Craig is making. Can you name the last movie that John Hamburg directed? What is it? It came out in 2022. It's called MeTime. It started Mark Wahlberg and Kevin Hart, and it went straight to Netflix. Yeah. And that is not a... Is that a movie to anyone? Meadime. Like, that's a movie with two bona fide movie stars.

Probably have like a $100 million budget. Yes. Huge movie from the director of Along Came Polly and I Love You Man and big comedy hits. And who saw that movie? Has there ever been a conversation outside of the one we're having right now about that movie? Like, that is actually exactly what you're describing. You know, I was talking about...

My daughter yesterday, and she was texting me. She was like, you're not going to believe when I'm binging right now. I'm like, what? Sex in the City. I'm halfway through season two. Liz is rewatching that right now, too. We had been trying to get her to watch sex in the city for five years because it was like, there's no way you, she would love it.

My daughter actually has a sense of humor. It was like, there's no way you're not going to like this. And she's like, those girls are kind of gross. They're too old. It's an old person show. But then it went on Netflix, and now she's ripping through it. And she's like, these. four so funny, this show's so great, oh my God, I wish I'd started watching it sooner.

The only reason she watched it was because it was on that Netflix, that first thing. So it makes me think, like, does Netflix have the power to just do that to anything? Like, if along came Polly was just in the new movie thing, would this become a massive movie for a month? Just because Netflix was like, hey, this movie? Yeah, I think so. I mean, I... Like, what has ever in our lifetime had more power than Netflix deciding?

we'll put this in our carousel. I mean, NBC at 830 on Thursdays in 1997? Not with movies, no. With movies, no. I mean, just the sheer audience, the hundreds of millions of subscribers, there's nothing to compare it to. It felt like in the 80s,

HBO, when they premiered a new movie. Like, I remember they would be like, next month, Rambo First Blood Part 2. I'm like, oh, my God, Rambo's going to be on HBO. But you got to think about it like this, like not to be the big, as dork version of myself.

But in 1930, when there was nothing to do at all in the universe... Whatever was in the movie theater. Every single person in America went to the movies because it was affordable and it was the number one form of entertainment. Well, that was the godfather. It was in the movies for, what, nine months? And that's almost 50 years later than what I'm talking about. Like, you've got to imagine a world in which there's 250 million people and they're all watching movies.

I'm talking about the power of a movie that otherwise would not be considered. Just having somebody with this magic wand being like... boom and now all of a sudden that movie becomes like because Netflix has done that over and over again like they just did it

with the accountant which I think and it's probably the accountant will probably be doing in the rewatchables pretty soon a good movie a good movie Gavin O'Connor like it

yeah and then it was in the Netflix went through the system and it's been on and it's on and it has these different legs now but my point about me time is that they actually

can't always do it with their own movies like Rebel Moon they wanted to be their Star Wars Yeah. And people are like, Star Wars on Netflix, I don't know if that really makes sense.

I want to see Star Wars in a movie theater. Right. But a movie like you're describing was like, oh, the accountant, this is easy to watch at home. Or like Craig described Along Came Polly.

It's like put it on the background. But it's rom-coms, it's smart action movies, and it's horror movies. Those are the three things that if Netflix just cherry picks anything and throws them on, it seems like it works.

Because people decided that they're comfortable watching those movies at home. Yeah. And the algorithm likes it. Sean Fantasy, great to see you. This podcast was Produced by Craig Horlebeck.

Hank Azaria, man, absolutely yoked in this movie. What was that guy doing off screen? He is so big. How is he so ripped in this film? And then at the end, Ben Stiller also seems kind of ripped when he's walking in. It seems like everybody was doing squats. Hank is one of the more ripped people I've ever seen on screen that, like, isn't an athlete. He is shockingly cut.

He, you see, I mean, honestly, he showed this off in the bird cage, like, 10 years earlier, too, where he's playing the housekeeper, and he's also, like, jacked. Like, was he taking steroids? you can't really look like that unless that's your job. Yeah, he looks like he's in the Ironclaw. He's so big. Zach at front. I don't know how he got so big.

He had a match with Brett Hart that night. Yeah, after Lubin. Well, do you think after Pacino yelled at him? Because you got a great ass! Or she's got a great ass. He got your head all the way up. And he's like, ah, I'm not strong enough right now. Man.

Good call, Craig. Craig, good to see. We'll see you next week of the Relatchez.