The Rewatchables - ‘Project X’ With Bill Simmons, David Jacoby, and Craig Horlbeck

Episode Date: June 28, 2022

The parents are gone for the weekend, and The Ringer’s Bill Simmons, David Jacoby, and Craig Horlbeck try to host the most epic podcast of all time. They head to North Pasadena to rewatch ‘Project X’ starring Thomas Mann, Oliver Cooper, and Kirby Bliss Blanton. Producer: Craig Horlbeck Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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where you can find Food News with David Jacoby and Juliet Litman. You can also find the Fantasy Football Podcasts with Craig Horlebeck, where they are kind of getting back into it. They're starting to rank guys, even though we have no idea what's going to happen this season. Some teams starting to have quarterbacks. We're still doing it. Fantasy is a 12-month-year sport. Coming up on this podcast,

I'm going to go have a long cry and then start calling some lawyers. That's right. Project X is next. This is supposed to be a small get-together. I wanted to be cool for one night. I wanted girls to notice me. Then things have got a little how to control.

Tonight's about the girls we never had a shot at. Tonight's about changing the game. Just being enough to be cool. Yep, all good. Happyness and I know everything to shine ain't always going to be gone. All right, Craig Horrobeck is here. He's us and the producer of the rewatchables. We've been roping him into some hosting.

Dave Jacoby has never been on the rewatchables. And it is impossible for me to think about the movie Project X, which is it's got its flaws. What? It's not that long. It didn't win any Oscars. but I remember when you saw this in the theater, we were working together at Grantland,

and you decided it was the greatest movie you've ever seen. I think you might have even seen it twice. It was everything you wanted from a movie. It's stupid. It goes fast. It's completely insane. And you were just the most elated I think I've ever seen you other than when I hit a lot of 18-footers

when we played basketball together. First of all, you're incorrect. When I say it was the greatest movie I've ever seen, that's just like the tip of the iceberg. It's not just the greatest film that our species has ever created. It's the greatest piece of art in any medium that our species has ever created. So it's not just like, oh, it's the best movie we've ever seen. Like, that's just me.

That's like my subjective experience. This is objectively the greatest piece of art our species has ever created. Craig, you were a senior in high school when this came out? Yeah, it came out in March. March my senior year. We all went. It was the greatest movie experience I've ever had. We felt hungover leaving it.

It's essentially a 90-minute frat recruitment. video and it's fantastic. Listen, there's a lot of problematic things about this movie. There just is. We're not going to go into any of them. We're just going to go through the experience because I look at it this way. This is a found footage movie. Same way, like a found footage horror movie.

When I see a horror movie, I don't litigate some of the murders and stuff like that. This is just a, it's not even a child. It's like a stepchild of that whole super bad era where somebody is like, what if we did this instead. A maligned stepchild. Yeah. The range stepchild. Yes.

It wasn't even like, it wasn't well reviewed. It did really well, but you think about the found footage era. So this starts really Blair Witch, 1999, but then it kind of dies a little bit. Then we get into paranormal activity, which is in the late 2000s. And then for the next five years, it's found footage horror, found footage horror. They find a camera. Something's wrong with the house. People go to Chernobyl.

It just keeps going and going. And then at some point, Jacoby, they have the bright idea. What if we just did a found footage comedy? This should not have worked. See, I don't think this is in the comedy genre, but this is, to me, I think, party genre. Like, there's a whole genre of just party movies,

and this is clearly that. And, like, you do have to turn a blind eye to the misogyny and the lack of diversity and the glorified drug use and pretty much all of that. But that aside, great movie. Great movie. So there's a one big party genre, which I think starts with Animal House. I think Animal House creates it in 1978.

A movie geared around the one big night. And then it just keeps going. Risky Business has it in 1983. Joel's parents are gone for the weekend. Oh, boy. And then the parents being gone for either the night, the weekend, or the week becomes its own genre. We see it in 16 candles. We see it in a house party.

It just keeps going and going. super bad, where that's not necessarily a parent's gone for the weekend, but same thing. We got to get to this party, huge party, how can we get there?

And then this one takes it to another level. These guys are like, we have to throw a party to be cool. This is how it needs to go. And what I like about, what I thought was so,

I watched it twice this weekend. It's on Netflix, by the way, for the people who haven't seen it. 88 minutes. Beautiful. I watched it twice. It just flies by.

I don't, like we have that anchor man. Best place for a P-break section? The Anchorman flute category. There's no P-break. It's humming the whole time. It's mad max is what it is. It just goes.

And it's like it is. It's mad-max. It's short and it goes 150 miles an hour the entire time. And then you find out the director was like never directed a movie before. It was all music videos and commercials. Yeah. That's why it's just like it's all just like one big music video and it makes me so happy. Nima Nora Zeta is the director.

It's really smart because. Because to me, it's the first movie to nail and capture like a huge party in the iPhone era. And it's such a smart idea because they just, they had the one guy, Dax Flame, who's like the videographer the whole time. But they're cutting around to a lot of different shots, but it totally makes sense because it's all just theoretically people on their iPhones. So they did a great job of like capturing what it's actually like to be in like a huge backyard party.

I thought it was like actually shot and edited really well. I agree. And reading, I didn't know a lot of the history. Kobe, how much have you deep dive the actual how they made this movie piece of this? You'll never believe this, but before this project, I might have done some research on Project X. So they filmed it over 25 straight nights between 5 p.m. and 5 a.m. on the Warner Ranch in Burbank, California, which I've been to. And they have this fake neighborhood there, which I drove through. and it's like the

Danny Glover's house and lethal weapon is on the street where they phone Project X it's across the street he's one of the neighbor's house so what they did was they basically made this

a big party and they gave all these people blackberries and iPhones whatever and they were kind of taping stuff on their own so when they used that footage of all the cell phones that's actually the organic

extras footage because it sounds like the extras were just partying for 25 straight days Jacoby you were You were in L.A. You were right there.

You could have just been at the Project X-House. You would have left Grant Lamb for that, I feel like. You could have been the guy playing beer pong in the movie, the old guy. Yeah, he could have been the neighbor.

He was the most relatable character in the whole film watching it now, even just like from 10 years ago. I think 10 years ago I was like, God, I love Costa. I want to be Costa. Watching it back 10 years later, I'm like, oh, I'm definitely the old guy

the beer pong old guy. Next to his wife on the news at the end. Yeah. The director said, quote, I hated spending 10 hours. looking through bits of flip footage. People didn't press stop.

It's in their pockets. But yeah, it was great. And that was why what Craig said about how realistic the party scene was, God only knows. I mean, I can't believe nobody's done the oral history of this movie yet because all the extras. I mean, I'm sure they were hooking up in cars. I'm sure there was real liquor. Oh, yeah.

They were drinking and partying. I have so many questions about how they filmed this movie. Like, did they just give everybody alcohol and just say, go nuts. We're going to film this for two weeks? My biggest regret is we had Miles Tower on the BS podcast, and I think I forgot to ask him. I'm like, it's, Top Gun is his second best movie. It's true. He was great in Top Gun.

It's his second best movie. So Todd Phillips produced this. And Todd Phillips has this whole legacy of just making just fun movies that he doesn't care. He doesn't care how they're going to be judged. He just wants to fun party guys, guys bust each other balls, basically. It was a script written by Michael Bacall and Matt Drake. Phillips described it as an experiment. He said basically they wanted to make a movie about one big party.

They had this whole creative team. They just started telling stories about the best parties they've been to. And then the writer Michael Bacall, he developed all the stories into an outlines narrow with the goal of creating, quote, the gnarliest high school party of all time. Jacobi, did they succeed? Oh, man. Is water wet? is the sky blue?

Like, I mean, what do you? Did they succeed? That's your question, host guy? Did they succeed? Of course they succeeded. I mean, they've raised the bar. That's like, if you're going to do a party movie now, you kind of have to start, like dated with Animal House.

You have to start with Project X and say, like, how do we build upon this genre? Well, to me, I look at this, like I look at some of the great horror movies. If you're going to do it, you have to go all out. You have to just completely go over the top, which I feel like they did. Did you feel like when you were in high school watching this, did you feel like this was a realistic scenario, Craig,

that this could get this out of control? Honestly, yes. One of my weird notes about this movie is I think it's a little accurate. Like, I think this is realistic and could happen. There's a lot of stories about other people who have tried to throw Project X-like parties. And apparently, there's like some party in Australia. This was, like, loosely based off some guy, like,

put something out on Facebook and, like, thousands of people came to their party. But this pretty accurately captures, like, the levels of everything. escalation that a party can get to, where at the beginning it's like friends and acquaintances from high school. The next level up is like people you don't really know from high school, but you at least know they're from your high school, so it's okay. And that's kind of where it's at its best. And then the third level is like, that dude's 36 and just walked in. I have no way to know who that is. And there's a flame thrower. And it's Dave is Dave Jacoby.

You guys will never believe this, but I might have thrown a party in high school that got a little out of control. It was, it was wild. It's the cars up and down the block thing. You know what I mean? It's like, that's really when you could tell. It's like the line of cars. How far away from your home do people have to park? That's sort of like how big your party is. And it got pretty deep. And I remember the next day, I cleaned everything up. My mom was coming home and I cleaned everything. The vomit, just looking behind corners and getting crushed beer cans. And I put it all these big trash bags. And I was walking the trash bags to my car. And my mom pulled in the driveway. Oh, no. Bill, Is this the last movie you would show Ben before heading into high school?

Well, this was going to be a topic. Ben Simmons has seen this movie multiple times, loved it, and has never been more excited for a rewatchable's episode. And we actually had the conversation about, Ben, you realize, I will actually murder you if you throw a Project X party. It's like, you know, I'm going to throw one. Like, he's like, you know what's going to happen, Dad. Like he's just, he's already locked in.

Ben is Costa? Is that right? I don't know. I don't know who he is. He's too cool. He's too cool to be one of the main characters. Yeah. It's probably more Brendan than anybody else.

I think it is a little different now in 2022. There's a whole, the way they use Instagram now to do parties like this where they put the, it's like an Instagram invitation. So it's not just like a word of mouth spread like wildfire thing. and yet I still feel like this could happen in 2022. There's no question.

And my son will probably be involved. I respect the hell out of this movie. I love that they just didn't really give a shit at the end and they glorified it. Like, I still think this validated every kid who wanted to throw a party. They're like, yeah, I'm going to do it now after seeing this movie. Well, that's one of the brilliant things about this movie is that by 2012, people were at least a little aware of like, hey, maybe we shouldn't glorify some of the stuff. Project X is just like, fuck that. The dad is like, damn, nice.

How many people were here? They weren't even hung over. Oh, no. Well, that's the thing. It's almost like a bit. I don't even understand how somebody could get mad at this movie. It's so ridiculous. It's like, would you get mad at the last half hour of Top Gun Maverick?

It's equally ridiculous. It's like, who are we fighting against that movie? That's one of the reviews of this movie are hilarious because no one cares. Like, all the film critics just shred this thing, but no one cares. Everybody loved it. well on rotten tomatoes the film holds an approval rating of 28% based on 130 reviews i think that might be the worst of any movie we've done crank it's actually 25 i actually just set up a bunch of accounts and just gave

just to bump the number well listen the people agreed with us because it has a $12 million budget and it made $102.7 million but as you said the critics i went up i tried to find the worst review of this movie and it was in a website called Empire. The writer Chris Hewitt gave this film one star out of five. He called the three characters, quote, spectacularly unlikable. He called the characters, quote, unrepentant, nihilistic, vile, animalistic, avaricious, charmless, entitled Sub-Cardashian, stunningly irresponsible brats, and then said this was possibly

the worst film of the last 20 years. It's certainly the worst comedy of the last 20 years. He was not invited to the podcast. New York Times, though, said that the funny script and skilled editing potentially made it, quote, The Animal House of the iPhone generation. Craig, I think that's true. I think so, too.

I mean, this movie is really essentially the Jonah Hill and Michael Sarah character from Superbad just turned up to, like, 15. Yes. You know? And I had that in a couple of the categories about the date. Was it too shameless how they ripped off those two characters? And honestly, would this movie be better off with those two characters? My answer was no.

I'm actually glad they played it this way. Guess what? Never saw Superbad. Not a problem for me. Not a problem for me. I'm too busy watching Project X over and over to have time for Superbad. As far as I've concerned, Superbad ripped off Project X. That's an amazing revelation.

We have so much to get through the categories that I want to take a break and then we're going to rip through the categories. This podcast is brought to you by Carvana. Selling your car should feel like one less thing on your list. Not one more. With Carvana, it is. Just go to Carvana.com, and to your license plate or VIN

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Visit Carvana.com to sell your car today. Carvana. Pick up fees may apply. All right. Most rewatchable scene. This was tough because you could argue the 88 minutes is just rewatchable. But I try to separate it up. And if I left something out, feel free to interrupt me.

I love when they're spreading the word at high school and it's super awkward and they have no idea. Just that whole five minutes, six minute stretch is great. So, sisters, Thomas Cubs House, 8 o'clock. Come get a piece of this white chocolate. Are you going to be going to Thomas's birthday party tonight? Thomas. Who's that? Is this Thomas?

Yo, do my thing that Dick in the sweater vest was telling us about. When they meet Miles Tower in the liquor store, it's just amazing. Think about it. It's on Dickens Street. Love to have you. Dickens Street? Yeah. That's your party?

You guys are throwing that? That's where I'm going. I'm just going to be fucking crazy, bro. It's my party. I mean, I'm Thomas Cove. It's my birthday today. Yeah, no, here's going to be like a limited high school pussy. Dude, high school pussy for day.

What? Mind your own business, Daddy. Now, they make it seem like Miles Teller is a big star? Yeah, he's like the cool guy who went on to play D1 baseball, who's back for this in town. Right, but I looked it up.

But he's playing himself. He's playing Miles Teller, the actor. Well, they're all playing themselves. He's not playing Miles Teller, the actor. He's just not that famous yet. No, I think he is. He's playing Miles Taylor. They say, hey, it's Miles Teller.

Yeah, but they're like, oh, he's playing second base for North Carolina. Yeah, true. It is a little confusing. But I think he had made footloose the year before. So I think he was the third guy in Footloose, the remake. So I think they're kind of leveraging it like he's an actor, right? Did I read that wrong or is it just super confusing? My read was that he was Miles Teller the actor.

Oh, I don't, because they were like, oh, he's playing second base for North Carolina next year. He's just like a cool senior who. Or maybe that was also true. And they just named everybody their real name. I don't know. I thought it doesn't make any sense. They didn't think a lot about it. They tried to cover all their bases.

We just put more thought into the Miles Teller character than the people that made the film. It's also great that Miles Tower in this. Like, Miles Tower is a legitimate famous actor now. It's kind of amazing. I wonder how he feels about this movie where he's like, I heard there's going to be a lot of high school girls there and all that stuff.

It's probably not like fired up at this point. And that leads right into the car with J.B. trying to explain a very gross act that I won't say here. Next rewatchable. Well, I guess we should have when they go get the drugs has to be a rewatchable from T-Rick. The T-Rick scene, yeah. Oh, he's super pissed, though. Dude scares a shit out of me.

Yeah. He comes back. Oh, my gosh, it's the Terminator. The Santa Claus, as Craig knows, nothing makes me laugh harder than really crude where nobody somebody else is in the room and somebody is doing something super crude in camera but the other person can't see what they're doing. So when he's humping the Santa Claus, that's going to hit my funny book. blatantly super bad ripoff.

Oh, yeah. Unapologetic. Not for me. Not for me. Not a super bad ripoff for me. Can I do it? Give me a brief 15 second personal story. Yeah.

15 seconds. I'm in college. I do mushrooms. But we're not microdosing back in the 90s. We're macro dosing. And I go see a stand-up performer at the sidewalk cafe. And I swear he can read my mind. He mentions that my Asian girlfriend broke up with me, which she did.

He mentions that I'm in college. So he's inside my brain. That stand-up comedian, he did it every, I think it was Wednesday night at Sidewalk Cafe for like an hour and a half. He was amazing. He was brilliant. His name is Rick Shapiro. It was TV. Rick. Oh my God. So imagine you're me. I kind of know him because I have mutual friends.

And I was like watching this film and I'm having so much fun. I'm like, oh my God. The mind reader Rick Shapiro is in this movie. This cannot get better. Well, he read your mind that you would love this movie. Next rewatchable scene, the party taking off. Oh, guys, let's start making some drinks. Well, let's get crazy in this bitch. Another thing that's always going to hit my funny bone is anytime a dog, you know, I love dogs. Anytime a dog is being used like in a bouncy castle a dog in slow motion

on a bouncy castle. A dog being lifted up in the air with balloons. The dog getting stoned. Just, I, listen, by the way, we, I think once our first dog, Daisy, we let her drink some beer once and she threw up

in a diarrhea for like nine months after, just from like licking beer for two seconds. This dog, this dog was like John Belushi in this movie. I love that Carrie's the best. I love the idea that Carrie was complicit in giving Daisy some beer. We were just like, I wonder, would she get a little buzzed?

What would happen? It's like, you know what happens? Diarrhea. Yeah, I can't believe you brought up the dog in the Bouncy Castle shot because it's literally like 45 frames of an 88 minute movie, but it hits home so hard. It's in my notes too. The dog looks like it's having a great time. No animals were harmed at the Mickey of this movie.

The dog and the balloons. It's so funny. Great performance from Milo the dog. Dog had a look on its face that you think a dog's face would look like if it was floating away tied to like a bunch of helium balloons. You could make an argument.

The dog just drifts into the sky and we never see the dog again. The dog just goes. That's the end of the dog. Next rewatchable scene. Robert the neighbor comes over to complain about the party. Why don't we just bring everyone to the back, lower the volume of the

guys, this isn't a request, all right? Party's over. I guess we're just going to have to agree to disagree then, aren't we? Listen to me, Thomas, either shut it down or I'm calling the cops. Fine, fuck it. I'm calling the fucking cops.

No! I'm calling the cops now. You punch your kid in the face. I'm calling the cops on your ass now. Do it, genius. It's all on tape. I just saw this motherfucker recorded right here. All I got was you punching that little child's face.

Fuck you. Go home Robert. Get tased. punches one of the security guards, and then right into the naked girls' only pool thing somehow working out, which is when you know, like, all right, this is the most ridiculous movie ever made. Robert the neighbor absolutely slays me, Craig. Oh, yeah.

And I also have the security guards being like 12 years old. Another fantastic decision. I know. They're younger than my son. The cops showing up when they put everybody in the backyard. Jacobi, this might be the best scene of the last 10 years. Well, I mean, it's completely feasible that you take 1,500 drunk teenagers and just tell them to be quiet for a second. Oh, totally.

A second. It's like five minutes. And also the cops going up and seeing like, you know, three miles worth of cars parked on the side of the road and then knocking on the door where the noise complaints from and then buying the fact that everyone's gone and that they've all calmed down now, officer. That was, it's not exactly the most believable. But again, like with most things, like morally. and story-wise. You just suspend a lot of disbelief watching this film. And honestly, it works.

Like, I'm saying, hey, like, there's no better way to get 200 drunk people to be quiet than just say cops. Everybody will just shut the right up. I believe that everybody in that backyard was quiet. It's all worth it for what happens next. Like, the silence is unbelievable and it's cooler and everything. But when the party turns back on, is that sort of like one of the many crescendos of the film.

And that is when the best song in the movie, Pursuit of Happiness Steve Rakey remix drops. I have that as part of this scene. To me, it's like cops show up. It's super silent. They figure out nothing's going on, which is why this movie's a fantasy.

It's not a real movie. Because in real life, there's too many cars. The cops are like, we're going in. Fuck you. But then they're leaving. Costa's giving middle fingers back and forth with the neighbor across street, which kills me.

And then all of a sudden, we go in a pursuit of happiness. Craig, we added the new we added the slow ride needle drop category. This is the most obvious one I think we'll ever have. You could almost say this should be called the Pursuit of Happiness Needle Drop. It was one of the biggest songs of my high school experience.

And the trailer, it played in the trailer, which is like one of the craziest trailers I've ever seen inviting you to this party. So that's really what started it. The music in general in this movie might be the winner of the movie. Beamer Benzer Bentley, heads will roll. I think this time, like the 2012 era, maybe just because I was in high school at this point.

I think this was like peak party music era. No, you're right. It's not the same now. No, you're right. I totally agree. So I just want to, I know pursuit of happiness would win this category, but I do want to give a shout out to white trash party from Eminem because you got to remember like 2012 Eminem and like it's, it's, how do I say, it lines up sort of morally with the party as

well. And, you know? And it's just like, yeah, this guy's like Eminem is not like really telling real things about how he feels. but it's just sort of this like shock value thing. And I thought white trash party was another really good selection. The music and the editing throughout is just, is fantastic. I was going to do this later, but I'm going to do this now with Pursuit of Happiness.

Just for Dave Jacoby, who's been in my life for a long time, 2011 to 2015, we spent the most time together. I probably spent the most time with you over those four years than anyone in my life other than my three family members. You loved Kid Cuddy because of this movie. and because of that terrible New York fashion show that you were the biggest fan

of out of anybody. What was the name of that show? I have no idea what you're talking about. Wasn't he in that show? Oh, oh, come on. How to Make it America, of course. How to make America? Yeah, yeah.

Don't you dare call that a terrible show. Don't you dare. Take it back. We liked it. I think most people felt like it was terrible. You and I liked it. You loved it. Oh, God.

And then, so he's in that and this at the same time. And Jacoby, you were just all in. You're his number one fan. Yeah, I might once in a while just Google News Lake Bell, and I found out she's dating Chris Rock. What? That's another story for another pod. Lake Bell's dating Chris Rock?

Google it's the wow thing, but move on. Holy macro. Okay, next rewatchable scene. She was also in How to Make it. Thomas goes on the roof. The obligatory Thomas, look at what we did as they look around. We did it. Thomas, look at what we did.

Epic. Is this big enough to be cool? Game changer. The middle fingers at the helicopters, and then the two jumps. Now, this is another reason you know this is a fantasy movie, because in real life, if they're going to try to teach us some sort of lesson,

J.B. either dies or breaks his back or something on the second jump. But no, somehow the second bouncy jump castle jump somehow works too. But that seems really good. What are you talking about? He breaks his pinky, so? That's true. He broke the most useless finger he had. Yes.

That's really good. Then T. T. Rick returning with the fire shooter. Fire shooter? I love me. What do you call that? Flame thrower. A fire shooter.

Or a fire shooter. Bullet thrower. No, it's got a gun, dude. Cicobie's having just as good. of a time during this spot as I knew he went. The fire shooter. Here,

continue on and speak into your audio recorder. Listen, that was a good flamethrower. Fire shooter. Is it a fire shooter or a flamethrower?

Well, anyway, that scene was great. That's when the party went up a notch. I love when the cops are like, we've decided that this

is too crazy. We're just going to let this fizzle out. Exactly. That was my best quote. The cops are like, I've got it written down somewhere. Oh, God. We're going to have to let this thing burn out before we think about going back in. Right.

I love it so much. We're stepping on a ton of categories, but it's just so much fun. Last scene I got is the ending when they're back at school. You know, if this were a sports movie, this is like the Jimmy Chitwood, I'll make it moment in Hoosiers or the Ray Hobbs Homer and the natural. Name any sports movie. the Pacino speech in any given Sunday. When they're going back and they're playing that cool,

whatever that instrumental song is, I like that song, and they're going through the hallways, or they're going through the hallway, and people are just reacting to them differently, and they slowly realize, like, oh, my God, we're finally cool. Like, that 30 seconds is fantastic.

Once again, I think that would happen. I think if some nerds in your high school had that night, he would get a standing ovation in the hallway. Facts. I was thinking the same thing. Like, I think that would actually be the cause and effect from throwing a party like this. The only thing I don't like about that scene is it too abruptly goes to him seeing his friend and then running off to make up with her. I would have just milked the walking through the hallway, just letting everybody kind of pay homage for two, three more minutes.

Anyway, what do you got for most rewatchable, Jacoby? It's, I mean, it's far and away the pursuit of happiness. The pursuit of happiness, like that montage, and I didn't realize that the director, was like a music video director, but now that you know that, it's like, oh, that is a perfect music video. They could just make that the music video for Pursuit of Happiness, maybe with some careful editing. And it's just like, that to me, I could, when I'm sad, you'll, you'll never believe this. Like, if I'm having a bad day and like everything's going wrong and I'm just sitting in the back of an Uber, I'll just put on Pursuit of Happiness, Steve Aoki remix.

And like, it just takes me back to that moment in the theater watching that montage and it makes me happy again. You agree, Craig? Totally agree. It's the perfect part of the party, because it's not when it's like, we're not at flamethrower level yet, but it's like everything, it's huge, but it's still going well. And it's right as the cops leave pursuit of happiness. It's the best. I'm trying to think of Jacobi and I have ever been to a party like that together. The only one I can even come close to thinking was even in the ballpark, but wasn't nearly as

crazy, was that Espy's party after when Drake hosted at that giant Bel Air Mansion. Right. Yeah, that was close. That was the closest thing. It didn't get out of control like this party, but it was the same kind of like, oh my God, what is going on? I mean, we're there.

Where are we? We had to get bust there. Like, I didn't know where I was. You have to be 18 years old for this, like this type of party to get that. Yeah, no question. No question. What's age the best?

We mentioned Miles Teller. Just the fact that he's way more famous now. It's fucking great that young Miles Teller is in this. I love wheelchair Robert. Like, wheelchair Robert gets dropped. and they're like, even Wheelchair Robert got a hand job. Like, what?

I forgot that line. And then the whole movie you're waiting for Wheelchair Robert to show up at this party and he just, he doesn't show up. I don't know why they didn't pay off. Huge missed opportunity.

Yeah, where was Wheelchair Robert? There's some cut scenes with Wheelchair Robert must have been established at some point as a character and he didn't make the film. We need to keep this under 90 minutes. Like, we need to keep it under 90 minutes. We cannot make this over a second over 90 minutes.

A wheelchair Robert's got to go. How about 89 minutes? Like, no, 88. Milo, the dog, we mentioned, but one of the great movie dogs. This is, we've flirted with this as a category over the years and never quite got there because not enough movies to have a dog, but it's... Even the dog gets laid. He has sex with a dachshund at the end of the movie.

Baxter versus Anchorman's a 10. Milo might be a nine and a half. Great job. Yeah, was that sex or was that a dry hump? It didn't look like sex. What kind of questions are you asking? I couldn't tell if that was dog sex. What penetration achieved between the dogs?

I don't know. You're sicko for even asking that. We expect us to know? What do you think? It seemed like more of a dry hump to me. Okay. The Santa Claus filled with ecstasy. First of all, the Santa Claus was hilarious.

And then it gets called back. And you're like, oh, Miles Tyler's going to kill the Santa Claus. That sucks. And then the ecstasy goes everywhere. Great reveal. I'm always, I'm always, I'm always forget that it's filled

with ecstasy until he does that. Yeah, it's a garden gnome. I'm going not Santa Claus. I'm going to garden gnome. It's a garden gnome with two middle fingers up, just like Costa to the neighbor. The two middle finger garden gnome.

And it's, the way they shot that is so good with Miles Teller, just, just hitting it. Slow mo. I have a lot of questions about the logistics of how they distributed all that ecstasy. It was like a pinata.

You know what I mean? It's like a pinata to four-year-olds. It just turns into a scrum. It's like the Mariners and the Angels. It's just crazy in the middle there. It's like sweethearts at a four-year-old birthday party. Exactly. Morewood's age the best.

J.B., why do you have a boner? Just makes me laugh every time. You rarely see the boner joke get pulled off in comedies. Anchorman Ron Burgundy, they nail it. But in general, like, boner, it's a really hard playing the land. Yeah, and here they decided to remove a layer of clothing. Just put them in the whitey-tides. It just showed a boner coming right out.

Yeah. Good stuff. And it also brings me back to like when you're 16, 17, you just get random boners all the time. You know what I mean? Just all the time for no reason. There's nothing to do with sexual stimulation at all. They get some mind of its own. You're in the middle of math class.

Like, what is happening? You mentioned the 12 year old bouncers. I like when we meet them. And they say, you guys look like ninjas. Like, ninjas are fucking pussy. Tax ninjas for no reason. I love at the end when they're like, hey, you didn't. pay us and cost is like you guys fucking suck the party burned down

the worst security ever I'd like they could have thrown him a hundred bucks I love are you inside their house great line too yeah those guys were additive Tyler and Everett Finding a dildo next to dad's bed is always a fun gimmick for any movie or mom's bed or any comedy

they're always like a dildo vibrator reveal but this one pushed over the top because J.B. was smelling it for reasons that remained unclear. I mean, just completely insane. We have a little person in here

who pops out of an oven and just starts punching people in the balls as hard as he possibly can for like I don't know, 15 seconds, but it's really funny. And really realistic. I almost don't even know how they've baked it. I'm not sure they did. I don't think anything was faked in this movie.

I think this was just a real party. Oh, that would have been great if they didn't tell the actors, if they didn't tell the actors except for the little person and they just actually just punched them in the balls. I'm just there's a 70% chance that happened. Yeah, I'm with you. Jimmy Kimmel's cameo at the end is age the best. It's just fun to see him. And then last one I have, you mentioned the soundtrack. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the remix of Headswell Roll. Oh, it's a, it's a classic. It's which completely reaments that song, but they have just, if you just, if you just, had that pursuit of happiness, we'd be good, but there's a bunch other on here. Eminem's not even on

the soundtrack. Um, Dr. Dre and Snoopjog, the next episode, Machine Gun Kelly's on here. It just goes on and on, but I would say in the running for best soundtrack of the last 10 years, right? Absolutely. Get out of your mind by Lil John. Huge song. That wasn't on the soundtrack either, but that was in the movie. Yeah. Great stuff. Any other would stage the best for you, Jacobs. Well, you know, I love this film. And I would say which age is the best for me is not a particular scene. It's really just like the soft underbelly. You know what I mean? The losers, the coming of age, the like we made it. It's just got a lot of classic sort of themes of like, you know, the finding the love, the true love. What do you have for? What's age is the best? I have two things. One,

like Jacoby said, the movie format of nerds trying to do X to get popular always works. It is always going to work. By the way, Revenge of the Nerds was another example. that. I forgot to mention that in one big party. That was literally the plot of that movie. Let's have a party to become popular. And then Thomas's drunk ecstasy face on all three of them really is

extremely impressive and kind of suspiciously good. They really look messed up. After the ecstasy, there's no way that guy didn't have something in it. You think there's some method acting? Yeah, a little Wiggins parade vibes there. On a different planet.

Also, the freeze frame at the end. I love those. with the like where are they now you could do that in every movie and I'd be happy with it next category is the slow ride award for Best Needle Drop Pursuit to Happiness wins this but man tough tough beat for the YayAs

with Heads were Roll I think any other time they win it's like when Yokic and Embed in the MVP this year it's like we're all winners but somebody has to win we have to pick somebody but I feel bad for the AAS I don't know what else I could have done Jacoby well what that is is What happens is it's the moment in which they're in the film because it's right after the cops come is when you get pursuit of happiness.

It's right after the ecstasy element is when you get heads will roll. And like the off with your head lyrics loud as you can watching everyone put ecstasy in their mouths and dance around. It's just like it's they both are those are the two crescendos of the party, I will say. Those are two peaks. The Big Kahuna Burger Award for Best Food or Drink in the movie. Body shots off the neck in this movie. unusual body shot with the neck. I've seen it been done.

Yeah, but it's usually not the traditional version of the body shots. And I liked it and I thought that, you know, there's really the food and drink. It's really just people just getting drunk. It's hard to even pick a drink. It is ecstasy of food. I'd like to shout out, yeah, ecstasy. And I'd like to shout out J.B. offering the woman a glass of red. And then she shotguns the beer.

That was a great moment. Yes. The Great Shot Gordo Award Obviously goes to the roof shot Look at what we've done All right The Butcher's Girlfriend Award For the weak link of the film

I'm just gonna be honest I well you go Jacoby And then I'll give you mine I pass No such thing No weak links It's perfect film Craig

I thought the mom I thought the mom was pretty bad It looked like the beginning of like a porno And the start of this movie With Costa and the mom at the fridge I was like What is going on here?

The mom, they could have done a much better job with the mom, I think. That's fair. Here's mine. I needed like 15% more from J.B. They really leaned into the fact that he's like mentally disabled. And then at the end, they kind of like validate that. Yeah. I don't know if that's how it should have played.

It's, J.B. If you had to describe J.B. in three sentences, I'm not sure you could come up with more than one. He's almost like the Brick Tamland of this movie in a lot of ways. but they don't lean into that part enough. So I don't know where left of them. He's ultimately not that essential because Costa and Thomas are the key characters. Yeah, he's just like a punching bag

that Costa can have. Yeah, basically that's it. All right, we're going to take a break and do some what's age the worst. What's age the worst? The disclaimer in the beginning is weird. Yeah, I couldn't tell if that was them actually giving a disclaimer or if it was them trying to brag

about how epic this party was. It's like a jackass thing? I didn't. There's two. There's two disclaimers. There's two different pages of disclaimers when you watch this. It's just like, you know, before I watched like Goodfellas and like, hey, the mafia's bad, murder is bad, drugs are bad. You know what I mean?

Yeah, I didn't get it. Like horror movies, it's like, hey, murder's bad. Don't kill somebody. You know? I don't know. It's weird by the comedy that you'd have a disclaimer. Costa has some inappropriate language in this, which we're just going to file. one of the blondes

they talk about how she's in the Playboy's Pack 10 issue I think that's age the worst Is Playboy, do they even publish Playboy anymore? No more Newty. It was like, I saw like a headline two years ago. It's like Playboy like no more nudity. I'm like a perfect.

Yeah. It's great. Pool, pool, no more water. Dax in the closet filming Thomas and Alexis hooking up, probably illegal. Great crime. Definitely thought about that. rewatch the movie.

Watching the movie, you're like, oh, no big deal. It's a sexy. This is great. You rewatch, like, wait a second. He's non-consensually filming people.

I mean, it's found footage. We have to take some liberties with found footage just so we can advance the plot. But that was a little weird. Yeah, he catches every single hookup in this movie, Dax. Yeah. Dax. Dax is now running a port company. And then this is from Wikipedia.

Following release, incidents of large-scale parties referenced or blamed the film as an inspiration. And there is a two-year epitaphic. of people trying to throw Project X parties, including at my house every time we had a grant land party. And at your house in two years when Ben's a sophomore. And at my house, probably a month from now. Even the term Project X now, I think, lives on. People just know that that means huge party. I mean, is that a what stage is the best or what stage is the worst? I don't even know. I'd take it as the best. Yeah, I would say that's a what stage is the best. That transitions nicely into the next category. Great job, Craig. Which category? The

Anchorman flute P-break word? No, was there a battle titter for this movie, which I say, no way. And do you know why they titled it Project X? Well, of course. Tell us, Craig. It was a placeholder name. They didn't know what to name it. They just titled it Project X as a placeholder name.

And they came up with a bunch of other names like the studio wanted happy birthday Thomas Cub. And Todd Phillips is like, you know what, screw it. I think we should just go with Project X. It sounds cool. And I really like that Costa, like that they know that they're calling it Project X. Like at the beginning, he's like, what's up, Project X? This is going to be sweet.

I thought that was great. As you know, I love when they worked the title into the movie. It's one of my favorites. I'm going to give you three alternate titles. Jacoby's going to be furious at all of them because I know you think this title is impeachable or unimpeachable. First one, biggest party ever? No. No.

North Pasadena. Closer to the hole. Rager. Oh, that's good. I like Rager. Rager's good, but Project X is the best. The only problem with the title Project X is when I'm late at night lying in my bed and I'm scrolling through the guide function and I see Project X and I click on it

and it's fucking Matthew Broderick's in that monkey. I'm just like, God damn it. Why is this not the movie I want to see? It's my only issue with the title. That used to happen with Heat with Bert Reynolds instead of the heat that we love on the rewatchables. Occasionally would be Heat with Bert Reynolds. and I think all the cable companies, they agreed,

let's get rid of Pete with Bert Reynolds. Yeah, let's get rid of Matthew Project one too. Yeah, I totally agree. There can only be one Project X. Best quote, I mean, I don't know how you pick. Do you have a favorite quote? Why don't you guys go first? Then I will see if we overlap.

Craig, do you have any? Yeah, Costa saying, next time your pool guy's here, he's going to be like, excuse me, Mr. Cub, but I seem to have found some water in your semen. I had that as my number one as well. It's so fucking funny.

I forgot about that one. I think I may have found some water in your semen. It's, I don't know, Costa took a pretty big beating in the reviews. He made me laugh 20 times of this. He's like the worst person of all time, but he's funny. He really is. It's like, what if Jonah Hill was Satan? I also loved, he's like a little fat radio.

man made me laugh for some reasons they're pulling up. And then he has a throw has a throwaway line. The only thing you're working on is diabetes, you fat fuck. He says to J.B. You're right. J.B. is just his punching bag, basically. Yeah. But

the pool line kills me. Jacoby, you cool with that? The pool line's great. I mean, that obviously takes the day. I mean, one that I particularly like is pretty simple was when Thomas has the ecstasy and he looks at Kassi and he goes, this won't fuck me up, right? And Kosson goes, of course it will. That's the fucking point.

The A Book of a Medal's Award for belatedly best quote. It's a throwaway line. My dad met my stepmom on Craigslist kills me. You just kind of put that in. Do people meet on Craig list anymore, Craig? No. You're the original Craig.

No, right? Only serial killers? I never met anybody who's met on Craigslist. All right, it's time. The Stephen A. Smith hottest take award. Jacoby, we each have to have a hot take about the movie. I don't know if I prepped you for this. You can sit this out if you want.

Craig, you go first, then I'll go, and if Jacoby thinks of when he can go. I don't even know if this is a hot take. I think the party was worth it. All of it was worth it for Thomas Cubb. He's obviously much more popular, which isn't everything, but I think he's gained all of his confidence. I think if he's allowed to go to college after prison,

I think he'll have a way better time in college. He was voted most likely to succeed, according to the freeze frame at the end. This is a win for Thomas. He just got, instead of they took his college fund, it's gone. He'll just, he could take some day classes at whatever the closest community college is. Take our student line. Go to a state school.

You'll be fine. It's kind of like comminga and moody winning the championship this year. It's like whatever you say about their career, like whatever happens next, they will always have this championship early in life. Whatever happens to Thomas Cub, he will always have that night. He will always have that. In his 50s, in his 60s, he can always say, well, is he's lying on his death. bed and Koss is there next to him holding his hand, he can say to himself, like, remember that thing we did 42 years ago.

Very fair. My take is this. Project XX were there in college four years later is one of the biggest missed sequel opportunities we've had in the last decade. I can't believe it didn't happen. This movie made over $100 billion. You're so right. What were they doing?

Don't know why they didn't do a college one. Like, there's a fucking neighbors, too, which is one of the worst sequel. of all time. But I think if a movie makes over $100 million and clearly has a sequel, like, path, and in this case, there's so clearly a path, just run it back with these guys in college, I can't believe they didn't do it. And I thought in the category about sequel, prequel, or prestige TV, I thought about the sequel. It's so easy. Costa, he's at Chico State. Thomas gets out of prison and visits Costa for his 21st birthday in college. Done. Done. Oh, see, I've got a different, I've got a different approach.

I think you have, this has to be a copy and paste format with new characters, sort of like White Lotus. I think you have to do the all female. I think you have to do the all black. You know what I mean? You have to like take it to different geographical locations and different sort of ethnicities. And like you just, I think that is going to be to me, and I'm stepping on a take for a later category is this should be like the Olympics. They should be forced to come out with a Project X movie every four years.

years, every 10 years, and it's just a big party. And everything else about it changes. The characters, the casting, the geography, everything changes. But the point is, is the goal is to have a big party to become popular. And it just changes. And it comes out every five years. Every five years. What about every two years?

Sure. Jacoby, the White Lotus example. First of all, this is why you're one of my favorites. Second, perfect. Third, there's still time. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like this movie is on Netflix. They use Miles Teller's face on the Netflix photo,

which I think is hilarious because it's unfair. Nobody else did well, I don't think, from this movie. But I'm sure the Netflix algorithm is like, holy shit, everyone's watching Project X. Like my son and his friends. The studio is saying that was one of the most misogynistic films that's ever been made.

It's got 28% of Rotten Tomatoes. It's morally abhorrent. Why would we ever make another one? You say, all female cast. we're going to flip the script. Right. We're going to make the dudes the butt of the joke. You know what I mean?

And you can fix that. And there's a strong lack of diversity there too. You know, you fix that pretty easily. Like, I want to be in charge of the committee to make another project X because I think you can make a version that is very 2020s friendly that is just as much fun. Checks all the same boxes that you enjoy as much as you did this one. But it's the problematic stuff you take away. But the thing is, this movie's offensive to everybody.

So I don't know. Maybe not like young white kids. I think there's like the underlying misogyny and the lack of like female characters is pretty, you know, it's out there. Yeah. Do you have a hottest take or no? That was your hardest take. I've already, no, my hottest take is that this is the greatest piece of art that our species have ever accomplished. I mean, the Mona Lisa or the 16th chapel or like all of me, whatever.

Schindler's list, like get out of here. Shakespeare and Romeo and Juliet, please. Project X trumps everything. That's my hottest take. Casting what ifs. In casting the three leads, the production, they avoided solo casting and concentrated on groups of three because none of these people had experience.

They would have them audition together and then they would switch actors in and out of the groups and then they finally settled out of these three actors, Brown, Cooper, and man. And then they wanted them to hang out. They sent them to Disneyland. They sent them to a weekend in Big Ben, and they just tried to get them to be buddies.

So that was that. I actually think that's aged really well as casting no names because it truly makes you feel like you are immersed in this party because you just truly have no idea who these people are. And then Dax Flame, who was the cameraman in this movie, at the time he was the 16th most subscribed YouTuber of all time, YouTuber and got his roll through open casting. And I don't think he's doing as well these.

days. Other than that, they, uh, the casting would have, so there's just not a lot. I've got one. Oh, go. I've got one. I read Miles Teller as Miles Teller. So I thought that was like celebrity. And I felt that that should have been Snoop Dog. He's in the region. And when he pulls up in the sprinter van, it can add another sort of like diversification of the party. We're like, we had this white party and then Snoop Dog or Lil Wayne or Flo Rida shows up and they sort of like then it becomes like a kumbai yaw. Like an old school. Exactly.

Yes. Like I thought that would be a nice like twist to this if the celebrity wasn't so in line with the cast. You know what I mean? Of the same age that they sort of like added another element to the party when they showed up with the sprinter van full of people. Yeah. For recasting couch, I thought they should have had like a low level like pop star show up to

perform or like like a Bobby Brackens. Like somebody who was like weirdly popular in 2012. And it's like not that cool, but they were like, I heard about this party and they show up. I wanted them to kind of get one of those guys in there. It's good. The Overacting Award, the Rough Lohan and Rubinick Partridge Overacting Award. They knew and they let it happen. Don't you call me, lady.

I come in here. I give these things to you. Give it all you got. Give it all you got. I treated you like a son. You fucking stab me in the heart. Fuck you. Fuck you.

I mean, it's hard to say everyone's, everyone's, everyone's, a living on this. I thought the high school bully was terrible. Hey, can I get to my locker right there? Dude, why are you staring on my dick? I wasn't. My locker's right there. Whatever you're fucking weirdo.

Just let it go. Come on. That's a sweet minivan soccer mom. See? His 42nd scene in front of the locker. He's like a cliche of a cliche of a cliche. That actually should have been a fun part. And the guy was bad.

What do you have, that's exactly what I have Brendan Brendan the cool kid or like the bully Like he was it was almost like He was the only one who was actually acting You know what I mean? Yeah Like he was like he was probably an actor

Like he was just so bad It's sort of like it seemed like it came out of like 1974 Craig I thought T-Rick goes a little hard I'm gonna be honest Te-rick downed it up Give me back my fucking gnome

I don't know The uh Judith Myers a word for the character Definitely killed first if it was a horror movie. I think it's Dax the cameraman. I think he dies. He thinks he dies first

because we never see him anyway. He's out. Best that guy award. I mean, everyone's the guy in this movie? But I think T. Rick, Jacobi's story about him that he used to be a magician,

all that stuff. He's probably our winner. The neighbor with the mustache looks familiar, but I looked him up and I... He does look familiar. Yeah. He's got one of those faces,

but I didn't even after I looked at his IMDB couldn't figure it out. All right. Here we go. Dion Waiters. This is going to be tough. Our nominees, Miles Teller, the old mustache guy, angry ball punching little person, Kirby, T. Rick, or the two teen security guards?

Or somebody I didn't mention. This is tough. I'll let you decide, Jacoby, because you love this movie the most. I got to say, I think Miles Teller is really. good in this movie. I think every moment he has is excellent and he really looks like he bought in. I have to go with the security guards. They're just such a fun element. You know what I mean? Like they take their job so seriously. They get the ninja thing. It was really when when cost is on the radio and finds out that Tyler is inside the neighbor's house. He flashes the light from inside the

bedroom. It's such a great reveal. It's like, are you inside the house? It's just so good. I think that they add a really, really nice element to the film. All right, great. I'll go with that too. Recasting couch. This movie's, I mean, pretty perfect casting. I like Jacoby's idea of could there have been either Miles Teller, could have been Snoop Dog, or could we have had a musical performance where that could have brought one other person in. Yeah.

If it really are having the perfect party in Los Angeles, there has to be some sort of celebrity element. And whether if Miles Teller really is supposed to be. be like some like senior that plays baseball at North Carolina. Like I think I think if you're having a huge party in LA that's quote unquote legendary, that means that such and such showed up. So I think that a little bit of that would have been nice. Half-Fascar. Research, we mentioned that Project X was not intended to title of the movie.

They also, they had a real secrecy element to this. They didn't send full scripts to any cast members and just scenes. And they were very worried about people finding out the idea. We mentioned everything. That was because they didn't have a script. script. I think that wasn't by design. It's like, oh, no, they didn't send out scripts to everybody because they wanted to keep it the secret. It's like, no, they didn't have a script.

Yeah, maybe that's, that's a really smart way to cover up like the lack of thought you put in your movie. Yeah, it was secrecy. Watermarked. There's a small scene in there where the camera in the heads will roll montage. The camera catches a young lady urinating and she kind of throws her hands up. And people on the internet think that this was actually something that happened because an extra was actually peeing and they filmed there and then they had to pay her extra to include it. I believe that.

I believe every single story about this movie. Internet rabbit hole about that whole scene. Who knows? That's all I have for. There's really not a lot of... Oh, I got one. What do you got? You know who one of the extras at the party was?

Who? Chet Hanks. Are you serious? Chet Hayes is in this film. You don't see him. Yeah, Chet Hanks is in the movie. That's amazing. This film couldn't be more woven into the fabric of weird 2012 culture.

Chet Hayes himself is like in this movie getting paid $400 a day to be an extra and probably getting hammered because it seems like there was some party incentivization amongst that set, let's just say. I still can't believe you weren't invited. You would have gone, Jacobes. I would have never come back. I would have never come back. They filmed this movie on the Warner Brothers lot because they knew it would be too crazy to film this at someone's real house.

And apparently they still got the cops called on them because it was so loud. 12 noise complaints, I think. Apex Mountain. I think every cast member you could argue except for Miles Tower, right? Yeah. The IMDs are pretty grim for pretty much everybody

after this movie. Alexis Knapp, she ends up being in the three pitch perfect movies. so she probably did the best. That's probably her apex mountain. North Pasadena, arguable Apex Mountain. Nice area, by the way.

Yeah, yeah. They're a good place to raise kids. Good food scene. Really nice, family-friendly. But this is the only time I think North Pasadena was really hammered home in a movie. So maybe North Pasadena has a movie location.

Craig, what about movie parties, Apex Mountain? I don't know how it can't be. name me a movie that has a better party scene than this I mean it's probably if we did the if we did the bracket it's definitely in one seed Animal House is probably looming somewhere House party

The original house party in 1990 I mean there's a lot of movies in the last 15 years where there's like parties super bad like neighbors has fun party scenes But this is unparalleled It's a real party I can't stress that enough It's literally happening

How about ecstasy in a movie? Hmm. Oh, wait a second. When has this been pulled off in a more positive way? Ecstasy specifically or just kind of hallucinogenic drugs? I was going to say ecstasy. Ecstasy is a plot device. Ecstasy adding to it.

There's no downside to ecstasy in this movie. It's one of the reasons. No hangover. No hangover. Everybody's fine the next day. My friends have told me the next day after ecstasy, you don't feel great about yourself in life. life. You don't feel good for like a week.

Yeah. I've been told. That's what my friend said. I've never tried. How about roof jumps? Ooh. I think almost famous Billy Crut up on the roof is probably the go-to roof jump. But this is at least in the final four.

A lot of good acrobatics in this movie. There's the zip line that somebody created. Where did it come from? Ziplines never work. Yeah, I was very curious about where the zipline came from. Does someone bring it in their backpack and they climb up a tree and screw it in with industrial drills? Oh, is it a conveniently placed telephone wire? I don't know.

I had that in picking nits. That zipline is way more complicated. And they never work ever. How about bouncy castles? Is this best use of a bouncy castle in a movie? I mean, you got the dog, you got nudity, you got people jumping off the roof onto it. I don't know what else you'd want. How about tequila revolvers, Jacob's?

And why did we ever have one at a Grantland party? I can't think of other movies that feature tequila revolvers, but post-COVID, tequila revolver doesn't play the same way it did pre-COVID. Great point. Jonah Hill rip-off characters? I feel like this was the peak. The peak and the valley, perhaps. A Hollywood studio going, Joe to Hill, we can't get him.

Could we get somebody like them? Any other apex mount for you guys? sweater vests Oh Great sweater vest I like it All right we're moving on to Best Race Horse name

From this movie Wheelchair Robert Wheelchair Roberts in there Project X What if there's a horse name Project X? You'd bet on that horse Copes

I would bet on that horse I went with Molly Gnome Molli Nome is Molly Nome is just a good one Molly Gnome comes around the corner. I also had Mr. Cubb because it could be either Ernie Banks or Mr. Cub from this movie,

but either way, I think Mr. Cub is a good horse name. What about my dad's Mercedes? And my dad's Mercedes down the stretch. Dad's Mercedes. Dad's Mercedes. Oh, I forgot that in Apex Mountain. Dad's car landing in a body of water. The risky business is still the Apex Mountain for that.

The Porsche falls in the water. And the Farris Bueller's adjacent. There's no body of water, but it's like the same vibes. That's one of the things I liked about this movie is it does dip into the past with some of this stuff, right? Like the car falling in the water, classic. Picking Nits. I feel like the three best friends would have been way more fucked up way sooner. Great point. Like J.B. is just throwing up at like 10 o'clock. They're doing shots before anyone shows up. Yeah. I don't see a lot of stamina for these three guys. They wouldn't need a strong food base.

Craig. Very much agree. They did show Costa puking. There's some puk and rallying going on in this movie. I do like that they took a break after they swam in the pool. They like showered and did their hair again. Refresh. Costa with the blow dryer.

Just getting his look back. That's a great point. Rarely seen at the party. Yeah. Very Bill Simmons at a Grantland party. Yeah. Nobody rallied better than me. Look, I know this movie.

part of the charm of this movie is that it's completely realistic. But this, how do they know this many good-licking girls who all know how to like drink and do all these drinking tricks? And like, these girls are like 16 and 17. I love, that's,

is that realistic? Yes, that's his nitpick. Girls know how to drink. No, I'm saying like there's like 50 supermodels at this party. They're North Pasadena and all of them know how to like shotgun and do all these different things.

It's very movie-ish. Shipping cocktails on the rocks. Yeah, there's always like a gimmick to every way they imbibe. I don't think that's that unrealistic. The supermodel thing, sure, I guess maybe they were more attractive than they should have been, but the entire high school came. And everybody, I mean, they're all 17, 18. I don't know.

Okay. It's pretty realistic. Mine is just like, is a little more serious. It's like the whole Kirby character. Like, not close to flushed out whatsoever. Didn't even touch the handle on the toilet with flushing that one. It was just like, she pops up. She's a cheerleader.

Tom's interested in. her. They make out, it's just like, I don't know anything about her. Like, I wouldn't know how to describe her personality or anything. She's just like a figurehead of an idea. She's not a character. They didn't, honestly, they didn't even need any of that. Like, I know they tried, they needed like some sentimental storyline, but her just quickly, like, she walks in on him having sex with what, Alexis. And then like, 18 hours later, he's like, sorry about that. And she's like, all good. He's cool now. That's the power of being cool. Literally. Well, they tried to set up that they had been friends for a long time. They showed this picture of themselves from way back. So they...

Because they need an explanation. Right. There's no way this nerd could be friends with this pretty girl. They're trying to set up the... They've always been friends for a while, but they've never acted on it. But they spent like a minute and a half on it. I love during that scene when Tom's looks at the picture, and goes, that was pre-Costa. It was like Jesus. You know, it was just like, there's, there's two errors of my life. There's my regular life and there's like my Costa, Costa infused lifestyle. Also, there is, Everybody knows one person from high school who used to be from a different town, like Costa who's from Queens. And it was just way cooler in that town. Yeah.

A lot of bragging. Yeah, look at the girl I used to hook up with. It's like, you found her on Google, I think. So, Jacobs, you've watched this movie a million times. You might have never noticed this. One of the security guards who gets punched by Robert the neighbor, his black guy shifts during the movie. Oh. Yeah.

Right to left. He gets punched. I looked at it. It was a right. Right. hook to the left eye, but then there's this one scene where the black eye swan part, they just, I think they just messed up and they put it on the wrong eye. So he's got a black eye.

I don't think they had a continuity supervisor on the side. At that point, everyone's drunk. Yeah, even the continuity supervisor struck. We mentioned could 400 or 1,500 drunk people be able to stay quiet for five minutes as the cops are outside? I'm guessing no. Jacoby, how do they not run out of liquor? Well, you remember they went on one run.

I mean, we're, I think we're supposed to assume. Yeah, Miles Teller brought a couple bottles. Listen. 1,500 people are there, 2,000 people? I think a lot of people, we're supposed to assume that a lot of people brought their own. But I also feel like once the Molly gets involved, liquor becomes like a secondary priority. Okay. This is, what time of night did the party actually?

get broken up. Is part A of my two-part nitpick. What time are we at? Is it like 4.30 in the morning, 4 o'clock? Yeah, I think like 4. What do you think, Shikobes? Well, I don't think space and time really exist in this world because if you start asking those kind of questions, and like, you know, the idea that the cops were,

they tried to rush the party and got fought back by teenagers. You know, so if I had to guess, I would say five. it's a five in the morning. Okay, which leads me to part B of my nipick. Would we really have live news crews and live news coverage at 4.30 in the morning on the local channels for a party at Pasadena? Or is everybody good? Like, are we really getting Bob, the star news reporter, out of bed for this? I'm going to say no.

Yeah, who's watching that live show at 4.45 a.m. There's no newscast at 3.30, 4 o'clock in the morning. So I'm going to say no. You know, this category makes me sad, Bill. Please. Sorry. You know what I mean? This is my film.

You know what I mean? Like, this is, what are we doing here? The dad being impressed at the end, how do we feel about that as a nip-pick? Or is it just tying into the fantasy? Okay, good. I don't have it either. I don't have it either. I think it is the funniest part of the movie of this day.

Because it's so subtle. They actually, like, nail it. I like that. They didn't have him fully lit in. He's like, I'm so upset with you, Thomas. And he's like, but how many people were here? He's like. 1500.

He didn't know you had it in you. He didn't I had it in you, son. He's like, I wish I was as cool as you. Well, it's another homage to the, uh, an 80s movie because it's basically like the risky business when Joel Goodson's dad sees him at the end. He's like, sometimes you gotta say what the heck. And he does all that thing. Meanwhile, they're pulling the car out of the pool in this one.

Any other nitpicks for you guys? Perfect film. None. Okay. So sequel, prequel, prestige TV, all black cast are untouchable. Craig made the case for the sequel. Jacobi's anthology series idea is pretty good. The White Lotus idea was great.

It should just never end. So they announced in May 19, 2015, that there was going to be a sequel and that it was scheduled for release in 2016. It fell apart. It never happened. It did make me think, though, if we're going to do a sequel with these characters,

this is right around 10-year high school reunion time. Like, they kind of missed a window on that, right? because the high school reunion, it would have been this summer. So, again, they dropped the ball. They just, apparently, they just never wanted to go back to the project X well. Next category is, would this movie be better with Wayne Jenkins, Danny Treo, Catherine Hahn, Steve Buscemi, Sam Jackson, J.T. Welsh, or Philip Baker Hall. I think Wayne Jenkins playing one of the cops that comes to break the party would have been incredible.

Wayne Jenkins is undefeated in this category. They should just, we have to get rid of the category. We had Jenkins with every time. Sam Jackson would have been fun. Next category is just one Oscar. Who gets it? Best picture. Best picture?

Aside from best picture. I actually have editor. Editing. It's so well edited. Like every montage just hits so perfectly. And the found footage stuff, the party scenes, and the cinematography is obviously what it is. But I just think it's the best edited film

because the music is so good and it's edited so well. to the music. It's not, it's, those, those alt angles that they used from like, the footage that the extras were filming. I just thought that editing is what should really, if they're like, I'm being actually legit, like editing, this should have one best editing. Who won best editing in 2012? Whoever they are, they should be in second place. So Argo is our winner. The other nominees were Life a Pie, Lincoln, Silver Linings, Playbook, and Zero Dark 30. I think Project X could have bump one of those out. Yeah, because they have probably like a thousand hours of footage that they

had to filter through and put this all together. So my answer was best original song. I don't know if pursuit of happiness qualifies because it was probably a song that already existed, but they could have cheated. But our winner that year was Skyfall from Skyfall, the Adele song. And then the other nominees were from Chasing Ice, Ted, Life of Pie, and La Miserra. Lemaresorla. Ted, it was Everybody Needs a Best Friend So comedies were eligible But I think it would have been funny

If Pursuit a Happiness won And the winner is Kid Cuddy And Steve Aoki Project X Did they play at the Oscars? Yeah, that would have been amazing Probably in answerable questions

I already asked you guys Why Realchair Robert was not at the party We'll never have an explanation Great question Bill this is why I love you so much. The idea that you had IDed Wheelchair Robert as a missing person really should have come back. They need to come out with a director's cut that involves the wheelchair Robert's side story because it exists. Wouldn't the dog have died?

I know this is a fantasy movie in a lot of ways, but the dog, the amount of little dog, they get the dog high. He's eating just stuff all over the place. He's drank, like that dog's dead, I think, by midnight. There's a lot of people who probably hate this movie. for a lot of reasons. PETA might be number one. Right.

There's a long line. There's a long line. Yeah. Fair. I would also say that I think what happens in that environment, if you want to go down this hypothetical highways, once the idea is introduced, we're going to mess with the dog,

people to start one-upping each other. And yeah, he just, he does, Milo does not make it through the night. Jacoby, what did cost his next five years look like post, post high school? I think he's just like DJ Khalid now.

That would be funny if he was. is actually DJ college. I don't think, I think he goes to college and is a loser in college and tries to recreate it, but just kind of can't. And he ends up as like the glue guy, Draymond Green of like the worst frat on campus. You know what I mean? He's definitely showing everybody like videos from the party in high school. And everyone's like, yeah, man, that's cool.

He gets way too drunk at parties, throws up. Yeah, we're at Santa Cruz Community College, dude. Like, we don't care that you were once cool in normal. Pasadena. And Queens, apparently. Yeah, and Queens allegedly. I don't think it goes great for Costa. And I also think that he probably ends up in sales.

That's what I'm going with. He ends up as like a life insurance salesman or retail sales. My thought was, remember Rudy, the real life Rudy from the movie Rudy, who went to Notre Dame and he had the sack and then like spent the next few years capitalizing on it? trying to and was just super annoying. I think Costa, same thing. He's showing people like the clips. He's trying to create some sort of company that throws big parties. And he's just trying to dine off the Project X moment for the next five, six years. Yeah, maybe he creates like a party cleanup service. You know, he says like his cousin can repair windows. Maybe he kind of blows that up and says,

like, you, hey, you throw a huge party and my team will come in on Sunday and make it look like nothing ever happened before you. Or I'll help you throw a big party. I've done this before. I threw the greatest party ever and it's just awful and multiple people go bankrupt and investors don't get paid back. He ends up, I've figured it out now. I've had some time to think about it. He ends up running the nightclub in the Hooters Casino in Las Vegas. I just need a little time to think about it. Like that, he moves to Vegas with these grand plans of like running the party scene there and then ends up running the nightclub at the Hooters Casino in Las Vegas. I think he gets into Bitcoin a little bit, too, and maybe NFTs.

Any other unanswerable questions for you guys? I have two quick ones. First one, wouldn't the drug dealer, wouldn't T. Rick have to pay for most of that damage because he burned it down? Isn't it not really on the parents? Would the damage really be that bad aside from the flame thrower stuff? And did T. Rick live? because at the end we see him get shot.

No, they show him in a stretcher. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, he lives. He lives. We can't have anyone die here. But wouldn't he have to pay for all that? Well, he is the one with the fire shooter after all.

And the flamethrower. That's a great question, though. Wait, why is the liability solely on Thomas's shoulders here? Like, I'm not the one who showed up with a flamethrower and torched the entire neighborhood. I threw a party, yes. But I did not burn down the neighborhood. So why is this on my shoulders? Great point.

Also, would euphoria happen without this movie? Oh. Huh. That's great. Did this movie pave the way for euphoria? Oh, like it, Craig. I would say visually, in a sense, but euphoria is just like the opposite tone emotionally. Yeah, but this movie was kind of like the first movie to get into like the grit of partying and like close up on drugs for teenagers.

And like you're looking at the 18 year old's face on ecstasy. it's the most up front I feel like I've ever seen kind of drug use in high school. One more in answerable question. This came from my son who just watched this movie like a month ago when it went on Netflix

and then was just furious at me because I've shown him all the great movies and he was just like, how did you not show me this movie? He was so bad. I love this take from Ben. Watches a movie, loves it immediately gets mad at Bill.

Got mad at me immediately. Holding it out. That is the correct take. from Ben Simmons right there. That is brilliant. His dad lets him watch a movie that is inappropriate for his age. Probably shouldn't even show it.

But you've watched Halloween when he was like six. So we're that flew by. I love the idea that he's mad at you. No, that's the thing. I've let him watch almost any of her movie. He's like, I was right here the whole time and you never showed me this movie.

He never showed me this. He got pissed. I love that. I know defense. The correct response. Best double feature choice for this movie. I'm going with with Animal House and Project X, the bookends.

You start with Animal House. Go Animal House, then you go Project X, 25 years apart. In movie time, it's actually like 50 years apart. But I like the combo that. I think you also could have gone risky business, Project X as well. What do you think, Cheops? Just Project X twice? Obviously.

Yes. Yes. That is the correct answer. Project X twice. I had Animal House too. I think risky business or revenge of the nerds would have been appropriate

for all the same reasons. Craig, what piece of memorabilia would you want from this movie? You can only have one thing. I'd probably cost us chalice. Oh. Then you just carry that around

every time you have friends over you got the chalice. I think that's great. Tequila gun was a runner up, maybe. I did the tequila gun as a runner up. What did you have, Jacobs? I had the flamethrower or the fire shooter.

The chalice is an obvious. one and the gnome. The gnome would be nice because it has a double middle finger up gnome. It's not your normal garden gnome. But to any one of those, to have friends over and to be drinking from a chalice, obviously they ask about it. You'd be like, this is the, this is Costa's chalice from Project X. Just saying that to someone would be one of the proudest moments

in my life. What's the number? What is your number for costus chalice? What one dollar or more, it's a no? What's your number for costas chalice? Bill your rich doesn't count. Who am I bidding against? It's a silent internet auction. It's just like an eBay auction.

I think it's like $1,500, I would say. Oh, whoa. Seems like a fair price. Oh, God. Oh, God. I'm going way over that. I would pay $1,500 probably for that thing. Yeah, I'm going $5,000.

$5,000, the answer is no. 5,000, the answer is yes. Also, that crispy minivan at the end is pretty cool. Like, another miss by the parents, they think they're punishing Thomas by going to school in that minivan. that is the coolest car on the lot. Oh, as a former minivan driver, there's just a lot of functionality.

One of my buddies had a minivan in high school. There's a lot of functionality with a minivan, with a bunch of friends. We used to jump out of the sliding door while it was moving into snow piles. It's a lot of fun you can have in the minivan in high school. So the crispy minivan was one of my runner up for the what piece of memorabilia.

I think that would be a pretty cool thing to have in the driveway. I think, so the Santa Claus thing, you know, which gets destroyed by Miles Tower. But my guess is they had like three of those, because you probably had to have the two backups in case one broke. So it would be tough because I don't know how good of a piece of memorabilia that would be if there were a bunch of them.

But if there was only like three, I would probably want the other two. I think that would be good. Like, hey, there's three of these. One got destroyed by Miles Tiller. I have the other two. It would be fun. All right.

The Coach Finstock Award for Best Life, lesson. I'll go first. I think this is a really good example of why parents should just never go anywhere when they have kids between 14 and 18. Like, Ben Simmons thinks he's going to have a part at this, but what he doesn't realize is during his sophomore, junior and seniors in high school, I'm not going anywhere. I'm here 365 days a year. You're going to be, you're going to be leaving for the airport, and then Joe House is going to be an Uber on his way from the airport. Right. I'm just not going anywhere. I'm going to be home for, three years. I'm never allowing this to happen. What was your life lesson, Craig?

That apparently if you go to all your neighbors and say you're not going to have, and say you're going to have a party, that that doesn't work. So just don't do that. Right. That's a good point. It's a waste of time. It's a great point from Craig. Yeah, great point for Craig. By the way, we're going to be making tons of noise across the street until four in the morning, just giving you a heads up. Maybe just don't do that. Not going to have the desired effect. What'd you have, Jacobs? It was Tom and his Alexis Kirby Love Triangle is don't go chasing Waterfalls. TLC taught us a long time ago, you know, like the Alexis body shot is nice and everything,

but like Kirby's a great-looking young lady, you know what I mean? Yeah, and Alex is going to be on to a college guy next week. So that was my sort of takeaway is don't go chasing waterfalls. Last category is who won the movie? I think the soundtrack is probably the winner. But you could also say Dave Jacoby because he's, talked about this movie more than anyone probably ever. I think those would be my two, my co-winners, Jacobs.

I'm going to kick Cuddy. That song, in that moment, in that time, with that montage, it hit so hard that I, like, use it as, like, Xanax. You know what I mean? Like, I use it like a prescription drug, like an antidepressant. I really do. Like, I really, whenever I'm, like, about to cry and everything sucks and my heart is melting into a puddle of just depression and sadness. I just play that song and I'm happy again.

It works. Craig, is this movie good enough for us to change the category from slow ride to the pursuit of happiness needle drop? I implore everybody put on this movie from when the cops leave to right before the ecstasy, you get the pursuit of happiness montage and nothing hits harder. Yeah, I think we'd have to change it.

You know what sucks about this movie is that you can't watch it in theaters anymore? That is what's the worst. This movie in theaters was, Unbelievable. Hold on. They play old movies and theaters from time to time. You know, we can hold out hope. What do you have for who won the movie, Craig? I have the music. Or just like the fact that this movie was made. All of us. Right. Yeah. Just humanity. Like, what are we talking about? We all won. Humanity did. That's it for the podcast. Thanks to our friend Dave Jacoby. Thanks to Craig Horace, who also produced this

podcast. And for July 4th, we're not doing the big, big, big movie that I promise. We're going to do it for Labor Day. But we're going to have something really good for July 4th. So stay tuned for that. And we'll see you next week.