The Rewatchables - 'The Longest Yard’ (1974) With Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, and Van Lathan

Episode Date: June 19, 2024

The Ringer’s Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, and Van Lathan agree to shave 21 minutes off this podcast in order to rewatch the 1974 classic ‘The Longest Yard,’ starring Burt Reynolds, Eddie Albert, and Ed Lauter. Producer: Craig Horlbeck Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If you're a fan of the inner workings of Hollywood, then check out my podcast, The Town, on the Ringer Podcast Network. My name's Matt Bellany. I'm founding partner at Puck and the writer of the What I'm Hearing newsletter. And with my show, The Town, I bring you the inside conversation about money and power in Hollywood. Every week, we've got three short episodes featuring real Hollywood insiders to tell you what people in town are actually talking about. We'll cover everything from why your favorite show was canceled overnight. Which streamer is on the brink of collapse? And which executive is on the hot seat? Disney, Netflix, who's up, down, and who will never eat lunch in this town again?

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where you can find Higher Learning with Van Lathen. You can find the Midnight Boys and the Ringerverse podcast. You can find the watch

with Chris Ryan. That's right. That's still happening. Can I do one plug? Yeah. June 18th. Yeah. I'm going to be on stage

with the group chat guys. They're doing a show at the L.Rae. Theringer.com slash events to get tickets at the L.Rae, June 18th. I thought you were going to plug the house.

the Dragon, whatever we're doing that. That's why I thought you were going to do, too. I was going to do that as well. I'm also going to be on House of R with Mal and Joanna doing House of the Dragon recaps. And still doing the watch. Maybe there were watching. So cranking. Even though there's no TV left anymore.

It's a great month coming up. It's a great month. Yeah. It's one of the best months ever. The Bears coming back. Mm-hmm. The boys. The boys.

Presumed innocent. Yeah. You got, you got House of the Dragon. I just want to spoil Presumdolling. Star Wars, the acolyte. It's one of the most packed months of TV ever. Yeah. Luca versus Tatum.

That's right. Kyrie versus Boston. Will Tatum get the respect he deserves? Find out next on the Rewa. Karee versus the history of Boston. Speaking of respect. The re-parted. Speaking of respect, you can respect our YouTube channel.

Ringer Movies. Please subscribe. Every re-watchables podcast we do is on the Ringer Movies YouTube channel. Right now, we are in the middle of sports movement. the first great sports movie over the longest yard next from the producer of the godfather from the director of the dirty dozen from the first second to the last the mean machine means it bert reynolds eddie albert in the wildest yet the longest yard movie ever made.

There's been great sports movies from the olden days. I don't think they've held up. This is the first great modern sports movie, the longest year I had with Bert Reynolds. I don't know how many times I've seen it. I know all the beats. I could have done this podcast blind. I was going to ask, I know you're really getting into pyramids. Yeah.

We should do the, I could do this blind pyramid. Oh, man. What's your number one? Heat's too long. Like, I feel like I need notes. You need to refresh it. I need notes to do heat. I think I could do

Red October Blind. I could do the Matrix Blind. Easy. I could do 48 hours in Halloween Blind. Yeah. Yeah. Those are probably my two.

Okay. Because those are also pretty short movies. I think it has to be like a 90-minute movie where you can... I was just about to say like some of the Star Wars movies

I know I could do them, but they're so long. I don't think I won't want to. Yeah. One of the great things about this movie is it's basically two movies. There's a movie and then there's just this massive

47-minute football game, which I've watched, I don't know how many times in my life, but I know every beat of the game, I've studied it, I've nitpicked it to death. It's going to be exciting to talk about some of those nitpicks with you guys. But this movie was on all the time. It was always the edited for cable version. And then there was a weird pain and scan thing because the way they shot it, so it was hard to follow for a while. And then when the TVs got bigger, the movie came back to life with DVD and Blu-ray.

But what's the first thing that jumps out for you, C.R. Um, I think probably Bert Reynolds is the thing that you take away from this and like, you know, I think for people probably a little younger than me, Bert Reynolds is like a caricature who kind of has this revival with boogie nights,

but for the most part is this like kind of winking, faded star. Yeah. But this is like watching, this is Harrison Ford. Yeah. You know, this is watching like a full

fledged movie star in like entering his prime. Kind of like the same. thing, Bert, like when I'm getting older and I'm starting to, like, pay attention to stuff, Bert Reynolds is in his, like, Lonnie Anderson era. Yeah. Right?

And so you're watching them like that as an older star in between having been this gigantic movie star and going to be the elder statement that he would be. And when you see him in this, he's so young, he's so virile, he's so funny. You're like, oh, my God, this guy was a big, huge deal. And it, like, opens you up to what a big, huge. film star he was like in the 60s and the 70s like a five tool guy where you're like man you can do comedy and you can convincingly

play football and it can seem like all the guys like you and all the women want to be with you like that's this is pretty wild and he was on the tonight show a lot and he was one of the great tonight show guest from the tonight show you'd have 20 25 million people watching the tonight show on a Tuesday night and he was always

one of the best guests and then he just started once he hit that smoke in the bandit phase he just put out two movies a year and they're weren't even really premises. Yeah. Cannonball Run is barely a movie. He's just driving cross-country. A bunch of fantasy people.

Yeah. I saw all those movies in the theater, starting over the end, paternity, smoking the band in one and two, like on and on and on. But this is, we did deliverance a while ago. And that was the one that put him on the map as a star.

This was the movie, I think that cemented it. You watched White Lightling on Tube? Yeah, I was just like messing around. You were before this? Doing a Bert Reynolds run on Tubey. That and Gator, a couple of the other, like, kind of B movies that he's, he's hamming it up in from the 70s. Yeah. They're all actually pretty entertaining, though, man.

When you were on Tooby, did you watch a movie called The Rapper That Got Shot in the Foot? No. Was Bert Reynolds in that? He wasn't. Dante Luis was. It's a Tooby telling of the Meg the Stallion versus Torrey Lane situation. Using their names? That's on Toobie?

It's called The Rapper That Got Shot in the foot. That sounds amazing. Do you think we should start a pod called What's on Tooby? Because to know that you watch something on Tooby is such a ringing endorsement for Tooby itself. I told Chris this, and I said this, just, you didn't even respond. I watched coffee with Pam Greer on Tooby on Friday. And then it recommended all these ones in the bottom if you like coffee and it was like just seven movies I wanted to watch. I'm like, I'll be back, Tooby.

Don't count me out. Tobe's got a lot of my spaghetti westerns too. where I was just like, oh, there's another spaghetti western I haven't seen. I'm going to watch this guy like... Well, because I watch Rolling Thunder. Yeah. And the...

Were you scouting it or did you just come up? Combo? But then Linda Haynes is so good and I was like, what else is she? And I was looking at her IMDB and she was like, she's in coffee and all of a sudden I'm watching coffee on Tubeby. That's a hell of a movie right there, my friend. It's...

It's a... It's a what age the worst. That's a hell of a movie. Stars black. I saw it when I was... That's a hell of a movie right. there, my friend. Anyway, back to Bert.

There's a stardom from this era. We talked about it with Newman and Slapshot. Redford had it. Bird had it. I don't know. It's hard for me to even think of guys from this era who could have done all the things he does. It's charisma.

It's a charisma swagger. You can totally believe that this assistant of the warden would give the game tapes to them to have sex with them for 15 minutes. You could believe that he could somehow navigate this prison world and be okay, that he'd be the coolest guy in the prison, that he's a former quarterback,

that he could escape from the cops. You've just got to pull off somebody. Like, who is this now? It's basically Brad Pitt 10 years ago, but I don't even think it's Brad Pitt. You know, the thing is that he's acting in the movie, but the charisma is so battering that like every scene you feel like that's actually the guy.

Right. That part of it, I think, I can't think of anyone who embodies that as much anymore like Bert Reynolds. I think Denzel had it in the late 90s, early 2000s. There's, you know, like, but even that, you got to pull off. True. He would have been playing the charisma. There's something about even the construction of scenes from that era, though, too,

of what is being asked of the actor, what they have to do. And we talked about this with Slapshot and Goldman talking about, like, Newman and these guys and how they just didn't need to do much. And there's a scene in Longest Yard We're gonna obviously talk about Where Newman goes And all the black prisoners Are playing basketball

And Newman just basically walks up to the sideline And stands there for five minutes And then walks away Reynolds He doesn't do anything He literally stands there The guys say a few things to him Granny's like I got this

He's got a little small smirk on his face He's got a little smirk You're just like This is I'm magnetized By what's happening here There's nothing is said That doesn't need to be said and then he walks away and you're like

how is that a gripping scene in a movie? And it is. And all movies now would probably work so hard to like explain things or to justify things or the actor would need to get his home run line before he walked off. Nope, he's just like, I'm just going to stand here.

I'm gonna fuck off. Some years ago T&T did these commercials and these commercials when it was T&T we know drama. Maybe it was U.S. Yeah, yeah, T&T. But they would do these commercials where they have like these small little snippets

with actors, right? Most of the time it was kind of stupid. But there was one with Patrick Stewart, where Patrick Stewart goes like, screen presence, like, can't be taught. Like, you go to acting school to learn how to mimic it, to, like, pass it off,

but it can't really be taught. There's one scene in here with the Native American guy. Sonia. Where he says, don't make an ethnic joke. And then when the guy says, how? Bert Reynolds literally just gives you 30% of a smile.

And it's hysterical. He's just a movie star. Yeah, he thinks about it and he's like, we'll work on it. Yeah. He's just hysterical. He's a movie star. And in that same way, he can be funny. He can be the hero.

He can be the sex symbol. He can be all of that. That type of five tool players is a movie star. With a darkness to him that I always think that came from real life too. I mean, there's some tough Bart Reynolds stuff. But which I think is the difference in him and somebody like Clooney. Where if you remade the longest yard with. Clooney at his, like, charisma peak

in the late 90s? They did make the longest yard. Yeah. Well, but you know what I mean. Um, I like Clooney you wouldn't buy in the, in the scene in the beginning, which is a pretty horrible scene with the girl. It's disgusting, yeah. But Bert, you're like, ah. The Clooney's also very serious. Like, you know, Clooney's popping up.

Those, there's a difference, but there's a actor that wants to drink brandy and be taken as a guy who kind of just wants to be out there as just a dude free-willing. And then at a certain point, just to be honest, there was a self-importance that most of these guys had a half. Like, Clooney breaks the movie and then he goes to Darfur.

And it just, it changes the way you look at him a little bit. And you don't expect him to get a plan. Well, you know how you also hear stories about guys from that era? Up through Harrison Ford where it's like, acting is like this thing they fell into and it's like the fifth or sixth thing they wanted to do. Yeah. Whereas like a lot of-

Yeah, Bert was like a failed college football player. A lot of performers today, you're like, I can tell this is the thing that you've wanted for your whole life. and like you are going to do everything you can to keep your grip on it like when you watch Bradley Cooper I like a lot of Bradley Cooper movies but like he looks like he's holding the wheel

really tight right in his movies and all and in his like interviews and stuff Burr Reynolds could not give a shit like Bert Reynolds torpedoes more movies than he helps because he's just like like put the camera there I'm gonna smile let's make the picture

I'm gonna improv three lines and you're gonna I'm not gonna give you what you need how about that well that's why it went so badly for him started in the late 80s because he was such a charisma actor, but when he got old, then he all of a sudden he had that wig.

Yeah. And he just kind of lost it for 10 years. And then it came back miraculously in Boogie Night. It's a movie that he ended up hating. Because he embraced his age. But he still had that sparkle to him and that little wink.

You know, you think about some of the funniest best scenes in that movie, like him in the hot tub and Dirk's I thought of my name. It's going to be Dirk Diggler and Burroughs like, ha! That's a great name. But if that's the

Jack Horner movie, it doesn't work as well. If he's got to carry 85% of those scenes. At the stage of his life he's in. Well, there's another piece with him. First of all, Adam Sandler remakes this movie, and as you guys know, I'm a huge Adam Sandler fan. Bert's funnier than Adam Sandler, who's

one of the best movie comedians of the past 50 years. The quarterback piece with Bert, I think he's the most believable sports movie QB. Actor. That we've had. Ever?

of any real actor who got thrown into a movie like this I think he's the most convincing I think he's the best Wesley Snipes No Duane from above the rim He was a real basketball player

I'm talking about star Oh star star because there are a lot of other guys Really the competition would probably be Costner who seemed really comfortable Playing baseball especially for love of the game Yeah When Costa's pretty good in slash shot In batting practice in Bull Durham

Yeah But like even like when he's trying to throw no hitter in full of the game. It's pretty convincing. Denzel was good and the basketball scenes and he got game. But Bert really feels like you could just plug him in to like the WFL that year and he could have like maybe gone eight and six. I don't want to get ahead of us, but the reason that you can do a 47-minute football game

in a movie is because it looks like all those guys are playing football. Which they were. Bert Reynolds in that last scene, you're like, damn, that's Bert Reynolds. Like, running an option. It was an actual football player as well. Like, and so that, and he not just, like, Hope has this line where he says, I walk like a ball player. And you kind of know what he means when you have the swagger and the body control

and all of that stuff. And he carries himself, he looks like an athlete, like a functional athlete. And he had a gun. Like they have, there's at least one, what's he, throw like a 50-yard touchdown in the first half. And it's Bert Reynolds, and he's throwing it. And it's a 55-yard Drake-May rope. That's how I work Drake May. Yeah, you're so.

It's a minor hero. He reminded me of Drake May in that scene. But it's obvious, and that's the one thing. It's obvious when an actor got with some specialist and learned how to dribble a ball or throw a ball or do something six months before the movie started. Yeah. And when you've been doing it and there's muscle memory and you know how to run and turn and do all that stuff, it's like you can't fake that. It's like Chris when you see him on the court. You just know.

Chris, you who? Not anymore. That's it's ninth grade. Reynolds Reynolds It's funny We did Newman And Slapshot two weeks ago

Yeah And from an A plus Lister charisma Stampoint This is on par with that For sure But then you throw in the athletic part It's way up there

For me it's It's I think the best Best athletic performance By a real famous actor In a sports movie I would put it against anything The premise of this movie pretty amazing too.

I'll describe it like this. Disgrace QB gets sent to prison. The warden forces him to organize a game between the convicts and the guards and the QB ultimately finds redemption by not selling out for the first time in his life. It's fucking strong, man.

That's one of those who are like, boom, let's make it, get the cameras, go. And I love it when a movie's premise makes the film basically sap proof or sentimentality proof.

It's too dark for this to be a feel-good movie, but it feels awesome. It starts from a really dark place. He almost sells, like, guys get hurt, people die. Like, it's a dark movie. But you come out of this

and you're like, yeah, man, this is how I think people feel when they watch Miracle. You know, like, that's how I feel when the, mean machine wins. You know, it was, it's, I watch the remake as well. I know we're probably not going to spend too much time on it.

But the reason why it doesn't really work, it's fun. But the reason why it doesn't really work is because it's not edgy enough. Yeah. It doesn't take itself seriously enough. Yeah. If not for Bert Reynolds' performance in this movie, this movie is a fucking drag. Like, you have this guy who's thrown his life away twice. He threw it away again and then he gets it back, but he's got to be.

in jail, he's getting abused. He's really at the end of his rope and this game kind of helps him find himself a little bit. But if not for someone who is not taking the whole thing that seriously and is joking the whole time with like a wink in the knot, the movie is actually very, very serious. Yeah. So from a big picture, because it is, it's turned in a 70 sports movie month, Chris. Okay.

Because we've done slap shot and we've done breaking away and now we're doing Longest Yard. no just to put in perspective all the sports movies that led up to this it was a lot of boxing movies it was a lot of baseball movies it was a lot of autobiographical movies and they were all done a certain way

and what's the Lou Gehrig movie is probably the biggest one right? Yeah and you know bang the drum slowly Brian's song Fear Strikes Out Brian song is before this yeah oh wow a shitload of

different boxing movies and there's a million of them but this movie was a real movie that happened to be about sports. Yeah. It tried to be funny, which no sports movie had ever been like,

oh, let's also try to be funny as we're doing this. It's got a real fucking director, too. Robert Alder. It's got a real director. Yeah.

And it's got realistic sports. And so it was groundbreaking in all these different ways that I think got copied immediately. Yeah. Because after this, you have Rocky.

You even have like rollerball, but you have all those basketball movies that come after that. You have slap shot. It just, it made it. a serious event to do a sports movie like this and be like, all right, if we're going to do this

this, this and this. It has to look right. And I think when you think about how long the football game is, it's kind of insane. Like nobody would have... Oh my God. It's literally 47 minutes. Nobody would ever do it that way now, but that's how they approached it. And, you know, some of the stuff Aldridge does with like that...

The split screen. The split screen, multi-screen stuff is so cool. I don't know enough about the history of sports broadcasting. like, does he invent that idea of showing a game in that way? I don't know the answer. It jumped out at me so glaringly when I watch it now.

I'm like, is this one of the lasting innovations of this movie? Like, when had that been done before? Or is it an innovation that needs to come back? Because like, you know, like, you think like when somebody's going to win the NBA finals and they'll just show one thing, they'll go to the night.

Like maybe we should just have four pictures in the box. Yeah, I mean, like, I think that there's, There's, they'll do split screen on NFL games to be like, here's two angles at the same time, basically, and stuff like that. But using it as a narrative device to build drama and also, I mean, it's literally like my what's age the best and my favorite part of this movie is like all the commentary that he's doing subtly by juxtaposing different images together, storytelling that he's doing that he doesn't have to cut away to do a whole other scene with the warden because he can have him in the right hand lower box being like, oh, shit, they're trying. again. Like, it's incredible. And it gives you the feeling and the scope of how many different things are happening

in the football game at one time because the game is essentially the culmination of all of these different storylines and different characters who have different motivations and wants and needs, you know, even when the guys get fucking get sit back and they're injured. There's so many storylines that are going on in a football game and the game managed to capture all of them. Well, so it has that. It also has like some of the funny stuff. in this movie. This movie is just genuinely funny.

This is one of the most It's hilarious. So my parents showed me this movie way too young. It was one of their favorite movies. And like if I ever would fall down or like come back from practice with an injury, my dad would literally go,

I think he broke his fucking neck. Like it was... I told you I broke his fucking neck. There's a whole scene about them showing people out of things. throw illegal elbows and here are the brass knuckles. I don't know. It's just great. There's also slow motion at the end, which I think was pretty revolutionary for the time. Yeah, I think he's taking a lot from

Peck and Paw and stuff like that where he's using a lot of those techniques, but I don't remember seeing it for a sports movie before that. But I automatically started to see other films that I saw. Like when that slow mo happens at the end, I start thinking of like school ties. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know the scene where... Oh yeah, this movie gets ripped up by everybody. Yeah, I literally start to think, oh, that's the same shot. He literally points, and then he gets the block and he scores. This is exactly the way David Green scores with fucked up Matt Damon.

It's got the big speech at the end, which has been ripped off ever since. They did the thing where they tried to make it seem like a real game, and they really staged it out, and they only had a couple of choreograph plays. Otherwise, it was some freelance stuff, and Reynolds was just getting hammered at the quarterback. Like, they're fine with it. I guess they were fine with the insurance piece of it. There's also the funny joke where he's just like the most important thing is that I get protected, you know, like,

which is actually probably also true for the set of the movie. Can't do anything without me. Yeah. Number one rule, protect the quarterback. I would be curious to know whether or not, like, Aldrich had seen and what early, early NFL films is like, because NFL films, I think, comes along in the 60s, right? We have seven Super Bowls at this point.

Yeah. So I wonder whether or not there's any influence on the way Sable did stuff over there. You know what's funny? You would think more movies would rip off how they shoot the sports or a lot of it's wide. You always know what's going on.

You always know where you are. You always know what the score is and you can see the plays unfolding and everything seems real. And then by the time we get to any given Sunday, it's a lot of like... I think they're compensating for the fact that they can't...

Dennis Quaid can't be out there. You know what I mean? Like they have to... Yeah, maybe. They have to be more careful. steps back, cutaway, stunt double, cutaway, you know. Great characters in this movie. I mean, just some icons.

Caretaker. Caretaker, man. Nate Scarborough. Granny. The warden. The warden's sidekick. I mean, down to Unger. Unger.

Bernadette Peters as the horny secretary. Just goes on and on. Who's your favorite of all the side characters? Oh, caretaker. Yeah. Yeah, awesome character. Awesome character. Great to have the audience member

who's going to be like asking the question, like why did you throw that game? Great narrator of the movie. So sad. Good vibe to him. Yeah, great vibe. Like the guy who's made his piece with his time inside,

but yet has found a way to be super viable inside where he's an important man, almost like Red from Shawshank Redemption, kind of the same dude. Lovable, good-hearted. but I am a convict type of dude that's wise. My favorite was Grandville.

Also, the dad from Teen Wolf, I said this before, which when I was a kid and I'm going crazy over Teen Wolf, it was always awesome to see a familiar face of him. It's the dad from Teen Wolf. And he was doing a lot of stuff. James Hampton, he's the actor, yeah.

Yeah, every time you saw him, you were like, Longest you're a Teen Wolf Dad guy. Yeah. I love Granville. I think he has that key moment in the end where he does the, I never thought you'd sell us out.

You know, just like, oh, man. Now it really has. hurts. Grandville, he's the only one who went out, right?

He didn't care that his whole side wasn't going to be in the team. He's like, you know what, I want to give me the free food,

I want to play football. And he stuck up for crew and then crew fucking backstabbed them. It hurts. It hurts like that he did it to Scarborough and Granville the most.

When you, oh, go ahead. No, when you watch the movie and he starts to throw the game, you're legitimately destroyed.

You're like, fuck, no, man. They got through so much to get there. As a narrative thing, like making him throw the game, it works so well.

You're so invested by that point. He looks like Mack Jones last year. What was that? You threw that guy by 12 yards. Just be honest. What are you doing? Did the warning get to Mac Jones? Only one Oscar nomination for Best Film Editing.

As we've discussed in previous spots, the 1974 Best Actor, which had Al Pacino and Godfather Part 2, one of the greatest act performances of all time. I gotta give Pacino the nod over Reynolds. Didn't. Pacino didn't win. Nicholson didn't win for Chinatown. And Dustin Hoffman got nominated for Lenny. Ark Carney won for Harry and Tonto.

Unbelievable. Albert Finney. Unbelievable. It's so rough. Every time you say it and it hates me again. And Albert Finney got nominated for Murder of the Iron Express. Like, Chris legitimately discussed it when you said. It's so bad.

The Pacino thing is so bad. It's three and four. The best performances of the day. Decade of not of all time. And it's like, yeah, let's give our Carney and Oscar. It's almost like I could split the vote. I could have snuck Reynolds into the finny spot. 2.9 million dollar budget made 43 million.

Massive hit for the time. No, no Raj on this one. Nope, Siskel, though. Siskel loved it. Siskel liked it. Pauline Kale loved it. That's our girl. She said, quote, Reynolds is perfect in this brutal comic fantasy

about a football game between crazily ruthless convicts and crazily ruthless guards. For all its bone crunching collisions, the picture is almost irresistibly good-natured and funny. I agree, Pauline. Good job. We're going to take a break. A lot of categories to hit.

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Restrictions apply. services not available in all areas. All right, most rewatchable scene. I really like the car chase and the arrest. It's a great car chase, especially in that Maserati. Harbinger for car chases to come with Reynolds. That's the thing.

I have a take on that later, but when he ends up at the bar, why'd you dump the car in the bay? He's like, I couldn't find a good car wash. Does the Burt Reynolds laugh? It's just, but the rate, I mean, like, it feels like real life people are endangered during the car.

Like, he's, there's pedestrians who are, like, jumping out of the way, and I don't even know if there are extras. The, the car chase, because you got to send this guy to jail, right? Yeah. And so it has to be pretty lit because you have to look, look how reckless and he looks different. He's got the longer hair. He's wearing a something. He's been abusive in the whole night. They really do a good job of saying this is somebody who needs to go.

He's a piece of shit. He's a piece of shit. Yeah. He needed to go sit down for 18 months. Yeah, I mean, in what's age the worst, obviously. is the domestic violence at the beginning, which is such a crazy way to start a movie. But it's also

this gamble that pays off because it's like, this guy is like legitimately a piece of shit. And within 20 minutes, you're rooting for him. It's like, yeah, let's get the football game together. It's not unlike the model that Aldrich's used in the dirty dozen. Where it's like,

you basically are going to give redemption to the irredeemable. You know, like you're going to take prisoners. You're going to have them basically be like, yeah, I did this, I did that. And then give them something that will give them their grace back on. I mean, it is a common theme of movies that we like, though, is somebody's a piece of shit, and then they eventually stop becoming a piece of shit and become our hero for the movie.

Yeah. Yeah. Um, the warden meets Paul Crewe. Paul Crew. Paul Crew. Recking crew. I just like all the, all the histrionics in this scene. Yeah. And all the, all the chess that's going on. Um, but we get the, Ruffalo Han and Rubenick Partridge drove her acting word earlier with Warden Hayes. Yeah, Warren Hayes won that easy. I want you to make that son of a bitch enthusiastic. Eddie Albert just dialing it up. I'm not being unreasonable, am I?

No, sir. Well, then you'll give me the title? Yes, sir. Good. And I want that man out there. And I want you to make that son of a bitch enthusiastic. That's a good one. I like the push-up guy trying to fuck with Paul Crew

and they have the pour in the dirt. It's got the little guitar twang in the background. The Swamp Reclamation is such a great location for that too. By the way, that should be the worst part of the movie by far, and somehow it's not. Yeah. It's like 10 minutes that should just not work, and it completely works for some reason.

The Ward and Bullies crew is starting a team. History. I read you like a book, Mr. Crew. He's just like fucking with him. He knows he has it by the balls. First football practice is great. The scene in the library when the guards try to fuck with Granville

is just really good. That actor, Harry Caesar, the way he handles it, and then the other guys watching him, you're like, oh, they're all going to want to be in the team now because they're watching it. It's like it backfires.

The had injured the other team seminar into caretaker drinking with crew. Why'd you shave them points? And then Bert has his Oscar speech. Yeah. I never gave a shit about football or anything else. The only thing I ever care about is my old man.

Blind. Never saw me play. Shit, I've been a professional that since I was 12 years old. Hustling nickels and dimes playing pool. I'm making enough money to take care of him. I figured when I got the pro ball. I made one big,

Kill him. I never gave a shit about football. Which I think was a full shit speech, right? I mean, it's two full shit speeches because his parents weren't blind. He makes that, does the joke story first. But there's some sort of truth in there that we're supposed to take something from it. I like that it's never like a straight-up, like I'm pouring my heart out here. Yeah.

Then we get to the game in the first half of the game. Yeah, I think I broke his fucking neck. There's a lot of good beats. We get the wardens chilling. if you don't lose by 200 points, I'm pinning caretakers' death on you. Yeah. You could be in this institution

until you're old and gray, or until you're dead, whichever comes first, I can promise you that. You're going to lose the game. And I want a 21-point spread. I can't do that. You've done it before. We get crew tank in the second half.

Two pick, sixes, and a fumbled handoff. Yeah. I mean, you've had a. Saints quarterbacks do worse than that. That's like a fucking mid-October Saints game. That's Derek Carr Special. Yeah. Derek Carr Special.

I can think of so many guys I could throw under the bus right now. It's very, very triggering. I like when he sits on the bench and the people move. Yeah. That's brutal. Yeah. It's like the all-time folk. It's just like, I don't want to be fucking near you.

They know he's selling them out, then he fakes the injury the whole nine. I put my trust in you. I didn't think you'd sell us out. We get that. And then we get, he's looking around guys, there's skating injury. He goes to pop. Was it worth it? Hey, Pop.

Yeah? Got time he hit Hazen in the mouth. Was it worth it? Was it worth 30 years? Yeah. For me, it was. Well, give me my goddamn shit. For me, it was.

Well, give me my goddamn helmet. I got to pick, I got obviously a knit to pick with that. There's a bunch of picks. Right. And then the big comeback. Nate has the big touchdown and immediately gets crippled by a guard. Hey, Paul, you got to do it. We get a reverse touchdown.

We get, Cruz just kills Badanski. Just throws the football against his balls multiple times. Unbelievable. Love it. We get a long pass for the fourth and 42 first down where he pushes off, which I think is, it's a Drew Pearson like a year before the Drew Pearson play. we get to tackle eligible for first and goal, 40 seconds left. It's crew manipulating the rules, just like Belichick.

Cruz's Belichicking it up. Then we get three stops. And what's cool is you know where you are in the game the whole time. Now it's fourth down, seven seconds left. Cruz torn jerseys, just walking to the bench. Where's he going? So awesome. And then he does the speech.

And it's one of the great speeches ever. We'll just play it. I'm not going to do it. You've come too far together to stop now. For Granny. For Nate, for caretaker. Let's do it. I like when he goes and forth down and he quiets the crowd.

Oh, yeah. Really quiet the crowd. Just like little things like that is what makes this such a great movie. But it's so much, like a lot of times when you watch older sports movies, you're watching films about sports that aren't played how they're played today. You can't really recognize the sport today. And this, everything looks and feels the same. The hushing of the crowd.

It's modern. It's so far as stadium. Absolutely. The winning touchdown is unbelievable. The history. And the cut. Like, he breaks the plane and then freeze and then cuts to like five different angles of what's going on. I like when he goes around, there's a great crackback block that borderline penalty.

Yeah. I got a couple of notes about borderline penalty. I don't think Jeff Stoutland teaches it. He comes down, he looks, and then they have that shot of him from the end zone as he's like getting his footing to make the run. And then they cut to another part. And he's just like, fuck it. And basically it seems like he vaults off the guy who's on the ground. He goes there.

He jumps over and rolls in the three people, but it's really well done. And then it seems like he's going to get shot and killed. But he doesn't. The first time I saw the movie, I was certain he was about to be shot. Yeah. Because the movie was also in 1970s movies that wouldn't be out of the question. Yeah, the movie's like so. In a way, the game is the hope of the movie,

but there's a lot about the movie that's fucked up. Somebody's already been killed, that you really love, and all these guys are in jail. And even when we scored through the thing, talking about who's playing in the game, just talking about, so I'm like, oh, they're going to shoot him, and then the movie's going to end like that. And even when I saw the remake,

I saw, oh, did they change it and kill the guy? But to get the ball and comes back. Game ball. Game ball. Stick this in your trophy case, says the last line of a movie is amazing. The warden just sitting down with the football. I would say for most rewatchable,

basically from the moment the warden says, you're going to throw this game to the second half. All the way through. I don't even know how you separate anything. Yeah, I mean, I would definitely listen to an argument for the last 45 minutes of this movie being the most rewatchable scene. Because if it's, this is the,

if the game is on when this is on cable, if the game has started, I am like. Which is the whole premise of this podcast. Yeah. If you're flipping channel, and he's in the shower with the warden. And the warden's like, I want a 21 point spread.

I'm like, oh, fuck. We're doing. 25 minutes of my... And I was worried about that. I was worried about when I watched the movie again, because I hadn't seen it in a while. I was worried about, am I going to be interested? The game is so good.

Yeah. I was worried, am I going to give a fuck about everything leaning up to the game? And I did, but the game is still so good. I would almost take individual parts of the game. My favorite part of the game is when he turns into fucking Michael Vick to get the guys back on. Yeah.

I'll take the punishment. Right. I just got to run and gain every single yard. He's doing the Cam Newton and QB drugs. Exactly the whole thing. But once to get to that point, you have to finish it out. It's amazing. I think that the game is the most rewatchable scene.

And if pretty much any point in the game, you know, if you check, flip to the channel and the game is on, you're like, I'm watching the rest of this. My favorite part-its of the game are actually the huddles. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I think you could actually take all the huddles and clip them together. And it's the story of the game. Yeah. Based on their like, fuck, these guys are really kicking our asses.

They're like, hey, we're kicking their asses to like, God damn, fuck you, crew. And then now we believe in you again. And that goes to your point about, like, when he walks back over to the sideline and they're like, what's, what's crew doing? What's he doing? So great. My son came down halfway through the movie. So he was studying for a history exam. Oh, Ben.

He took a breaks. Ben, look at Ben. Man, it's final exam week. And he's like, oh, you what do you watch him? Like Longest Yard. And he'd only seen some of the Sandler one. So he was like taking a break, so he started watching it. And he stayed for the last hour.

And as you know, Ben will just immediately leave or he'll, anything that's old, he's out. He watched the whole thing. And a couple times he was like, Dad, this is good. He was getting a couple of those. And then the winning touchdown, he was like, Dad, that was good. Yeah. That was really cool. He was really into it.

I was like, they still in schools June 30? The only other scene I would throw into rewashable scenes is the How to Inflict Payton montage of them going through and like Here's the this guy's femur You know and like Well the movie I haven't even talked to do The movie has a great training montage by the way

Where they're giving everybody the scores Yes Yeah And the 70 is the agility score Like even that's fantastic Yeah and Samson knocks the heavy bag off The whole heavy bag off Is that a 10?

The introduction of all the this motley crew of characters And you got The big that guy was around What's that actor's name? He was around forever playing a heavy in all of those movies. Like, the guy's like, fuck. Richard Kiel? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Moonmaker. Jaws. Yeah, he's been around for a lot. So, like, that whole part of the movie is literally just that they do the same scenes in dirty dozen. Yeah. But it's war instead of football. So he's like he's going around to recruit all the guys. Then he's got it.

They're a rag tag bunch when he first starts training them. Then they get really good. Then they have all these attributes. You have to find a way to get them to work together a whole night. I had that in what stage is the best. The premises like this where the guy has to recruit. the people for his team. Ocean's 11.

His band, his gang. And it's each one. And it's like, we got to get him. It's usually our hero with one other person. See, that's why, see, Bill, you like stuff like that? Yeah. I got a movie for you, Bill. Avengers and Game.

You like that? You like people being recruited to go do something important. I got a movie for you. Maybe the summer for you. Yeah, thank you, please. What's age the best? Sports movies with giant stars as the leads. Just miss this era?

We don't really have giant stars. like this anymore. CR, this one's for you. An opening shot of a 70s movie that's an ashtray with 11 smoked cigarettes in it. That is what she did. And a radio telecast of a college football game. I'm pretty sure you're in from that point on.

Is that a tube category for you? This is coming out a couple of weeks later, but the women's US open golf tournament was this weekend. Did you see the, I think she's British, the British lady who smokes heaters on the course? I did not see that. Charlie Hull.

and she smokes Sigs on the I didn't know either and she was like I'm trying to quit vaping is the reason why she's smoking cigarettes but I was like this is like Yeah she should be the biggest star

in women's golf Yeah She's like my Caitlin Clark Yeah They showed the anniversary of some 84 finals game of Jack Nicholson court side

And they show them the CBS broadcast before the game He's courtside having a heater On the court I said the 80s were the best Well I have more What's age the best

What do you have? The split screen. I think actually, like, it's something that in other people's hands or it's very easy to imagine a way in which, like, that somehow, like, takes you out of it. And it doesn't.

It actually is, like, so cool to get, and I think maybe more movies should do this. 55 minutes into the movie or an hour into the movie, and then a whole new way of seeing the movie starts happening. Because you feel yourself snap to attention. Like, whoa, we're going to make, this is what this is going to,

they're going to shoot like this. This is awesome. So I like really responded to that. That's why I do feel like sports television could add that. I think they could add that with football and basketball because we have the TV. It's probably so hard to direct live. Yeah, because you've got to be throwing back to the truck.

Let's test ourselves a little bit. You have any of what's age of best fan? The car chase. Like when I watched the car chase, I'm like, yo, it seemed like a, and obviously there, the 70s is the 70s the best car chase. Car chase, Apex Mountain. Yeah. So it's filled with, but when I look at the car chase,

that feels like the car chases that I grew up on. Well, you know what, you know what it is? I have a theory in this. What? Because the cars weren't as good. Even though they were expensive and fancy, the cars would spin a certain way where they would skid longer. Yeah.

I think now the car is like, it's just the driving and the precision is too good to them. So that's her mazoradi? Yeah. It's like a 73 mazorati. And every time he's picking this bank in this turn, It's like skidding, skidding, skidding, but never, like, rolls over. I think that's it.

I think it's the skits. Speaking of that from the beginning, so his angry girlfriend at the beginning is Anitra Ford. Everybody's bought you. A nitra. Anitra Ford. She has that mid-70s kind of hot look that I just don't know why that went away. Her name is Anitra? A nitra Ford.

She down with the community? I don't know. Was she on prices right? Is that like one of the, like, the biographical things I see? saw about her. Because all the girls in Rollerball are incredible. It's like... Yeah. I don't know. It's just quite an error. They're built different.

The multi-picture opening for the game, see what I mentioned. Ed Loudder? Ed Lauder? Lauder? Oh, Canauer? Yeah. Captain Canaererer? Ed Lauder, I think it is. Such a familiar face. Great career. Here's the sports movie resume. Longest Yard. Jericho Mile. Youngblood.

Gleem in the Cube. And he was in school ties. Pretty good. Gleam in the cube. Seminole, seminal Van Leighton movie. In Port Miser. Slater in there. Young Tony Hawk in there. It's a good one.

Using skateboarding the soft crimes. It's on the list. Slater month where we do Gleaming the Cube, legend of Billy Jean, and the repumping up of the volume. The repumped? Oh, you guys didn't pump up the volume already?

I think we got pump up the volume. Happy hearing, Hardin. Revived as a rental. Yeah, it's one of the biggest successes in the history of the rewatchables. We did pump up the volume, partly because it was not available on any streaming service. And then it was like...

And a month later, Amazon had it. And we were like, we've done it, guys. Yeah. Quick question. It invented podcasting. But did. Quick question. We'll come back.

Is there any argument to be made that Heather should be included in a Slater? Yes. Heather should be the fourth one. I mean, you could really talk me into Broken Arrow pretty quickly. You know, it can be else with you? I like Broken Arrow. Over a fucking hated movie. What the fuck?

Broken Arrow is solid. It's, no, it's legitimately a good movie. It's kind of, the premise is kind of, but it's like a legitimately good movie. It's when Travolta was in his little thing, Slater's still coming up. Sam Mathis back in it. Sam Mathis, the whole nine.

One of my passionate passions, how about that, is... Passionate Passion Pyramid? Post-Pulpiction Travolta has an amazing run. I even like domestic disturbance. Shoot me. That's a good movie. He's taking a lot of roles. He's figuring it out, but there's some gyms.

Face off, domestic disturbance, general's daughter. Get Shorty. Broken Arrow, get Shorty. Like, he's ripping him for six, seven years. What was the movie where he was the angel? Did you see that? Michael. Michael.

That's a, that's not one. I didn't mind Phenomenon. Oh, I love that movie. No powder. Phenomenon. I like that. I like that. I love, I love that movie.

He gets hit with the whole thing. Phenomenon has Travolta telling Kira Cedric, will you love me for the rest of my life? No. And she goes, no. I love you for the rest of you all. I'll love you for the rest of mine. Oh, mine, yeah.

See, Van and Kalika, they get choked up on a Friday night. Match a phenomenon. A couple more What's Age the Best. Michael Conrad eventually becoming the, let's be careful out there, guy in Hill Street Blues. A seminal, seminal TV character. Can I throw a What's Age the best that is adjacent to the production of the game within the movie?

Yeah. Just introducing the announcer, Michael Fox. I think first time we had an announcer as a sports. movie Crutching it. We're probably the best. Genius. Yeah. And then like obviously like is all the way down through Dodgeball.

Like you did they always bring an announcer in but. Well, it goes sideways with the remake because they have Chris Berman as the announcer. They bring it. It could not be more annoying. That's where the remake fucks up. The remake stops taking itself seriously and it becomes cameo porn. Yeah. And it doesn't feel like a real movie.

Cameo porn's a good way to put it. Yeah. It's like what happened to entourage. What stage the best? Bert's gray leisure suit in the first scene we didn't really go into. So what's the deal? Is he like a kept man of a rich woman in

West Palm Beach? Is that... He's like a stud almost. Yeah, because at first you feel like, well, he's in XQB so all that stuff is his, but you see all the pictures of her. It's her whole thing. She's keeping them around as like a... She's clearly like a multi-married, probably like three husbands, all rich

set up in West Palm Beach and Nash is with Bert. Bert's like the stud horse. What's age the best? Caretaker can get steroids, vitamins, and greenies in 1974. Yeah. Was he patient zero to the steroids era? He's on his shit. That's what's so funny about steroids when people think it's started with like Barry Bonds.

Sex with a woman. Sex with a woman. Right. Sex with a woman. What's age of best? Aldridge deliberately shot the film as wide as humanly possible with the multi-picture stuff so that it wouldn't go on TV. Yeah.

Like I want this to be a film, enjoyed in theaters. This is a What's Age the Best and a What's Made Me Sad, but Caretaker's murder is such a great twist, but it's such a bummer. It really takes the fucking area of it. But it's such like a fucking wind out of the salesers. Yeah. But it's really good. It's really smart.

Unger is such a fucker in this movie. And it's so, I forget every time. And then like when he's just like, I could be your friend. And you're just like, man, this guy is weird. He's like the guy in Shawshank. Yeah. The movie. I could be a friend to you.

The movie never gets so lighthearted where you forget that these guys are in prison. And in danger. Yeah. So, what's age the best, just this decision. Initially in the script, crew was supposed to get shot in the back at the end, and they decided that was a bad idea.

And then, what's age the best, just Burt being one of the crankiest assholes in the history of Hollywood, he did an interview about this movie in, like, the mid-2010s, and they asked him about the longest-yard remake, and he said, I never saw it. It was a paycheck, and that was it.

I never wanted to see it. He just was, like, pissing all over it. Yeah. Bert Reynolds, legendary crank. What you got for Great Shot Gordo, CR? I think it's the crossing the plane of the goal line and then the split away. I agree.

Maybe even, like, great editing Eddie or whatever. Denethees, Benny Han, award for scene-stilling location. The football stadium is magnificent. Yes. It is. It's so good. It's perfect size.

It's the perfect size. It looks really good. They do a good job of setting the actual tone of a football game. And like when you're in it, they're rooting for the mean machine. They hate the guards. The whole prison establishment is the bad idea. Like, you really want the mean machine to win because of the atmosphere. In Florida, where do you think it is?

Like, where do you think it's like in the panhandle somewhere? I think it's in like a pretty rough part of Florida. Because I'm trying to, I was trying to imagine. 40 miles outside of Jacksonville. Like, hey, what are you doing on Saturday? What's that? I'm trying, it's not a real, it's not a real prison on the Woff? They shot it in Georgia.

Oh, they shot it in Georgia. That's probably where they, yeah. But where do you think it's supposed to be in Florida? Well, I was just like trying to imagine, like, being in Florida and be like, hey, man, are you going to go to the beach this weekend? It's like, no, I'm going to go see. No, the cons are playing the guards. Semi pro football at a correctional facility.

Well, okay. That's fun, too. I got three tickets. We're going to go hang out with the Citrus State Cheerios after the game. There's gonna be a hundred armed guards there. You know, it's crazy? I knew this. There is a Citrus County jail, and it's in Tampa.

So maybe it's in Central Florida. You know, they called the cheerleaders. They called them like the Citrus Citi. Yeah, so maybe that's where it's supposed to be. The Kid Cuddy Pursuit a Happiness Award. Best Needle Drop. It's never been an easier decision. That's easy, super easy.

Saturday special. Just the perfect song. Boy, that's a good song to listen to you while you're driving. Right. Leonard Skinner, most important 70s band for movies? For background music? It would be them or the stones? The stones are way high up there, too.

I guess probably the Stones wins. Wait, okay. Wait, you mean in the 70s? Going forward and in the 70s. But, like, being used in 70s films? Because I feel like part of it was like when Scorsese made Mean Streets is he was one of the first people to, like, really spam pop music. I need to workshop this one more.

I'm trying to think. But I like where your head is at. Skinner has, if you're talking about beyond the 70s as well, then obviously it's the stuff. Beyond the 70, yeah, but then Skinner, Skinner's there, though. It's got Freebird and Forrest Gump. Yeah, they meet and gump. It's huge in dazed. I don't know.

The Almond Brothers feel like another one that's been in a bunch of stuff. Sure. Fleetwood Mac too. Oh, Mac might actually be it. Yeah, Fleetwood Mac has got a lot stuff. The Big Cahooner Burger Award for Best Use of Food and Drink. Homemade Prison Liquor Always. Jack dog, come on.

Would you be a homemade liquor guy? I was thinking about what my professions would be in prison. And I think I would definitely, definitely be angling to be the announcer. Like, that seems like a great job. I would just be like, you guys playing pickup? Can I come announce it? Can I come do like? What would make you so valuable in prison?

Because I also watched Shot Call it recently, which I had never seen. After the pod? Which was surprisingly good. It's awesome. What's surprising about it. That movie's amazing. Guys, let's be honest about it. I have theories about some of the shot caller was the worst marketed film ever.

Oh, there's no question. Like when the shock hauler commercials, I would be like, yo, man, what the fuck is this? Like, why would I look at this? So, like, why would I? I don't want to look at this. And then you watch the movie, 10, 15 minutes into the movie, you're like, yo, what the fuck, John Bernthals? And it's like, this movie's actually fucking good.

Yeah. But what would you do inside of prison that would make you so valuable that you couldn't be fucked over? That's what I'm saying. I would be like, I'm going to do play-by-play for kick-up sports. I don't think that's my one. Then I would be a drug dealer. You wouldn't be homemade liquor guy?

No, I wouldn't be fucking the gritty's guy. I would be the bookie like immediately. The first time they're playing basketball, I'm like, hey, guys, anybody have any action on this? I immediately get the go. Look, guys, I got action. I got action over here. I got action. The thing is, is that, like, what happens the first time a dude is, like, really pissed off

that the Ravens didn't cover. I'd have muscle behind me. I'd be cutting in two of the biggest dudes. Be like, look, I'll cut you in. Would it be a non-denominational kind of thing? Or would you gang up with one of the racially backed gangs as a book? Oh, I'd have all of them because they'd all have to go through them. The United Colors of Venetton of muscle.

Gambling doesn't see different sides. It's just wins and losses. Everyone's in. It's the way to play. Would you offer same game parlays? Impres. Boots, Parlet Boots.

Wednesday is my profit boost token. He'd be fucking dead in like two weeks. Some guy wouldn't understand what the fucking million dollar picks is. He would just feel like, fuck this, I'm shiving this guy. He has to get what? He doesn't get how many rebounds? Oh, he's fucking dead.

It's 10 rebounds and he has to kill a guy today. Can you imagine Bill the day the Jontay Porter scandal broke in his prison book? Butch's girlfriend or weak link of the film I just think I just feel like crew could have thought that caretaker's death thing out a little when the warden's threatening him with it I'm going to pin this on you

If crew goes up This is more than nitpick But I think if he goes up to the team And is like They're going to put caretakers murder on me I'm going to be here for decades We have to lose by 21 Or my I'm dead

Like, I bet a lot of those... I bet a lot of those guys would be like, well, it was a really fun first half. Let's take a knee here. Not just in this movie, but the why don't you just tell them aspect of... I can think of like a dozen movies. It's like, yo, just say,

you know the war is a piece of shit. They're going to believe it. Well, it's also even for self-preservation. Like, Cruz's going to get fucked up after this game. Yeah. If he throws the game. Yeah, he's fucking over people who are then going to ruin him for the rest of his time.

prison. Yeah. Yeah. But I also think just fundamentally, he had an alibi. Everybody knows he loves caretaker. Everybody was hungry's a maniac.

Everyone was a hunger's a serial killer. I just felt like that wouldn't have scared me the threat. What's age the worst? We mentioned domestic violence in the first scene. It's pretty harsh. It's really it's like pretty jarring. Yeah. Yeah.

And just real quick, that's why he does it automatically, so angrily, like, because Burr Williams can be a fucking asshole on screen what he wants to be. He just, it was like, oh, shit. Like, right at the beginning of the movie. Yeah, no

actor is making that choice now. It bothers me that Bernard up Peters isn't cuter in this movie, because I think she's super cute. She's beautiful. Yeah, but in this movie. She's wearing this fucking beehive. She just looks like a crazy person. Do you ever find spiders in there? Yeah, I get it. I just feel like they could have

had her let her hair down at some point. I feel like Oh, what stage is the worst Cross with the Nipick is They loop the same shot of the warden Just standing up in shock During the game scenes Or

He does this like 10 times And I just think he might have filmed it once From 10 angles And then there's a couple of If you watch this film as much as we have Like They'll show like Like in the during the Star Spangled banner

Like before they start playing the national anthem You can see the guys mouthing the words. Jaws is, yeah, and then the Star Spangled-Vanner starts. And then the only other one I had is they kept remaking this movie. It really upset me when they made the Sander remake. Because as you know, my rule of remakes is don't remake something that's perfect.

And I felt like this movie was perfect. Don't touch it. If you're going to remake it, I have some ideas for that later. They only remake things that are perfect. Yeah, well, this movie killed when Sanderer. I mean, it was one of the biggest movies of his career. Oh, no. It's like 200 million like over something like that.

And it's on all the time. It was the one my son knows. It's gotten to the point now where people like, wait, there was another longer share. That's a what's a worse times 100. Yeah, it stole the thunder of the original. Nobody realizes that this is the longshed. You know, it's funny, that doesn't happen as much as you think it does.

To where they remake a movie and then the movie completely undermines the first one. That doesn't, that almost never happens. What also, this movie is 50 years old. But, you know, like there's other movies from the 70s. Like, nobody remade. I'm not saying this was as good as taxi. driver, but there's certain movies that nobody touched French connection. Yeah. I felt like this

should have been a, we don't touch this movie. You had any, what stage of worse? Using smelling salts for guys who get knocked out on the football field. Yeah, let's bring that back. I'm going the other way. This concussion protocol stuff. If we were live tweeting, Derek Lyder is just going to salt in her.

Dermonia capsules. But if they were live tweeting like the football game in Longest Yard and people were like, this isn't, this isn't normal. These shouldn't be playing. Like, he's got a concussion. That's a funny idea. People, 2024 people tweeting during this game. The guards are being so unfair.

They just knocked out Nate Scarborough. The only thing the age of the worst with the football, and it's not like an age of the worst, it's just the one thing that like when you're watching the movie, you notice is the wide receivers. It's different back than like flankers are different. And they don't line up on the line of scrimmage. And they definitely don't get into like Justin Jefferson, like,

sprinter poses yet. and that's the only thing that throws you off. I guess there is this is the first football movie to be made in which a receiver is standing at the line of scrimmage because when football started up through the 60s, they would be like hand on the ground, basically. What's Asia worse is brass knuckles being brought to the football field.

These people all use brass knuckles in the game itself. Should that come back? Maybe. just being able to like Your coach basically did it with the bounty That's not what he did Bounty Gate It's not what he did

Basically put bounties on people He put bounties on people He put bonys on people We had brown brass knuckles though Far through the ball away Through it to us We win Nothing can stop us from that

Take that away Was there a better title for this movie? Mead Machine Maybe maybe Yeah I love the longest yard And how you don't know Why it's called the longest yard

Until the last five minutes Prison yard. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Well, we have to do the Van Lathen Award because he's here. The Van Lathen Award did this movie need more black people? No.

We're good? We're good. Well, as a matter of fact, not only that, but I appreciated the fact that this movie. Are there too many black people in the television? Well, I appreciate it. Look, this movie did two things. Number one, they said that they're not that many brothers in this prison. This is good.

Citrus County. Citrus County cuts against, you know, common. we held situations. And then also, the fact that we were important. They had to have us on a team in order to win. You need the black guys. He had to court us. They had to ask us for our votes, unlike politicians.

Expect to just go do it anyway. But you have to actually come to us and give us our community something. Let's take a break. Let's take a break. Snorring, gasping during sleep, feeling fatigued, Ask your doctor about Zepbound, terseptite. The first and only FDA-approved prescription medicine for moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, OSA, and adults with obesity. Zepbound is a prescription medicine used with a reduced calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, OSA, and obesity to improve their OSA.

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The can you digger word for most memorable quote It's got to be the Become too far to stop now It's good can I throw a couple other nominees out there Broke his fucking neck is one too Yeah that one's good I think I broke his fucking neck I think that Bert Reynolds saying

That's why people like to have me around Because I have a sense of humor Essentially explains Bert Reynolds It's like yeah you know what he's kind of fun And I really always crack up at I think it's Carataker goes that's before we learn karate. But actually the one I love

actually, I should point out when the warden is like, why is it, do you suppose that I can walk through the yard surrounded by hate and in total command? And Kenauer goes, because you've got 15 gun turrets all around you that say you can. Has there ever been a movie where the warden was a good guy?

Brubaker. That's about it. The CR thinks Luke Wilson could have been Harrison Ford hottest take a word. I'll go first. Bert Reynolds, greatest car chase driver ever.

And it's not even close. Car chase driver. Nobody was better in a car chase being chased by somebody than Bert Reynolds. The way he drove the car, the way he looked around, the demeanor that he had, the charisma, the unflappability.

He was just the best at it. Because Popeye Doyle really flappable. You know, he's getting. getting real angry. He's honking a lot. You could throw Steve McQueen at me, maybe. Yeah. Shit. Steve McQueen was the man in these cars.

But Reynolds has just more movies where we just saw him. But you're not saying coolest driver. You're saying best car chase guys. Best car chase guy. Always felt in the safest hands. If you're going to climb in a car with somebody and you're about to be chased, I would want Bert. Because Ryan Gosling is a backup.

Smoky. You got Smokey. Oh, drive. Canaanball run? Jesus. Bert probably spent more time driving in movies. than anyone ever, I would say. Do you have a hottest take?

It's not really that hot, but I think that this movie is just as good about being about America as it is about sports. And the idea that basically kind of come from different racial, cultural, economic backgrounds, but the thing that brings us all together

is we fucking hate the boss, whoever that is, and we love football. Whoever the boss is. Whoever the boss is. It doesn't matter who is. Not at this table. You know, I mean...

Talk about the Swedes. Yeah, or they're like the larger, the man, you know? It's true. It's true. So there was a pregnancy in this movie. I didn't see her reach for a condom. That's my hottest take. Like, she's with child.

Oh, Bernadette? Bernadette, yeah. I see her, like, whatever she, whatever's going on there, there was a life created inside of the prison. And now. Did they say that in the movie? No, this is his hot take. Yeah.

Oh. But you should pitch. I was like, did I miss that? Paul Cruz's illegitimate son growing up in the 1980s. Yeah. And all he has, he has to live, like, you know, will Paul Crew, like, acknowledge me?

That is... Paul Crew Jr., so he's going to be in college in, like early 90s, like the program era? Like Rocket Ismail? Oh, my God. If the program... If a Paul Crew Jr., a movie about Paul Crew Jr.,

that's the type of shit I would do if I ran a studio. I would do the program... Just take old characters. Like obscure... Yeah, I would do the program, right? But the lead character of the program would be Paul, it'll only be one line. Yeah. He's like, why are you, because, like, in that movie, Schiffer is just angst, angstiest shit for no reason.

It's a Heisman candidate, and he's angsty as hell. But why? He'd be angsty because his dad is a convict. They don't want him to find out his dad was Paul Cruz. Cruz, whole thing. It's a great idea. Casting what ifs. James Hampton was supposed to play Unger, but pushed to play.

play caretaker instead. Yeah. Smart. It's good sliding doors. Yeah. We had real football stars in this movie, including Joe Cap, who a long-time quarterback, and Ray Nitchke, who was one of the most famous linebackers of the 60s. Yeah, he's great.

Yeah, he's the ball guy. He plays the guy who gets hit in the balls. Who would be the 2024 equivalents of those guys? I have Kurt Cousins and Khalil Mack. Columack is a good one. I don't know if there's a better middle-in-lawful. linebacker kind of guy or is it could be any defense player like i'm just trying to think of the to equal the fame of those guys because joe cap wasn't like pat mahomes sure but he was

pretty famous and cut and he beat some teams and made the playoffs he was kind of at that kirk cousins level and then nitchkey was probably better than kulelea mac but i don't know who she he played middle linebacker yeah i'm i'm trying to think of who you who would be in a linebacker spot because Niske is like such He's like a big We must don't have linebackers Oh the guy on the 49ers I guess Fred Warner

Fred Warner Yeah Fred Warner But you know what the problem with is though He's too good looking Like look up Fred Warner right now That's what I was thinking Fred Warner like an ugly linebacker You need like Niske's like a big

He has to be a heavy That you want to see him get hit in the balls And Fred Warner is like a really good looking guy A lot of linebackers now Kind of pretty boys a little bit Yeah Sunny Six-Skiller played the part of the Indian who apparently was an outstanding quarterback

on the University of Washington in the early 1970s played in the WFL. Best that guy award. So James Hampton, probably not of that guy, right? Well, I think he is to 99% of the people listening to this. He's like the guy from Huntford October, the guy from... See, he is to me, but in a room with Sean and Chris, he's not. But, like, to me, I would say that he is.

Ed Lauder is also not of that guy. He's Ed Lauder. I feel like. I'll be honest with you. I thought he was with that guy. I will consider him with that guy. Yeah. I feel like Harry Caesar who played Granville.

I never really knew what his name was. I was just see him as Granvo. But he's been a lot of stuff including few good men. Yeah. Wrong stone gathers no moss. Yeah. He's the newsstand guy. Luther.

Yeah, Luther. One of the strangest sorking characters. And the fact that like Kaffee is like homies with that guy. Yeah. Hey, Luther got Sports Illustrated for me. Do Hustler in yet? Did I get a popular mechanic, Sports Illustrated, a hustler?

Unger is probably the winner, because I don't even know what that guy's name is, and he's super creepy. If you saw him in anything, he'd be like, hey, that's hunger. A harder category is the D.N. Waiters Award. D.N. Waiters, for the biggest heat check. Bernardette Peters, two scenes. Shockner, I think, qualifies.

Richard Kela's jaw is probably not. Pop has only a couple scenes. The Warden's. sidekick has one line. Yeah. And then the Citrus State Cheerios, the cheerleaders. So Michael Fox is the announcer, is not Deon. We can count that as well.

Yeah, that's good. Let's go with him. He also wrote his own commentary. Like, he wrote the announcing. Before that, that's actually a good one. Before I had Bernadette Peters, because she turns up the heat so much in her second scene. She goes from being standoffish to fucking the very next time we see her. So I was like, that was the definition of it.

But I'll go with the announcer as well. recasting couch director or city who is Paul Crewe in 2024 does that person exist do we have the actor could Gosling do it that's the guy who jumps out of me but really it might be

it might be Glenn oh yeah Glenn Powell yeah it might be Glenn our guy Glenn is I like how you're one name now it's like Luca we're asking so much of him he's remaking the running man you know he's remaking twisters can he be Schwarzenegger

Paxton and Bert Reynolds? Kind of because you know why? Because he... He's a good athlete. He can also play sports. Yeah, he can play sports. So, like, he is...

To me, when I look at it, Gosling, is, you think that he could do it, right? But when you look at Glenn Powell, he kind of is the... He's got the Bert Reynolds thing going for him. He could grow a really good Fumanchu.

Yeah. I like that one. Foo Manchu. Tony Romo or Chris Collinsworth for director's commentary. This feels like a Collinsworth wound to me. Yeah, but I

tried to challenge myself thinking about like Collinsworth not doing the football game you know it's like oh my caretaker's the finest raisin jack in the entire joint that kid that's something making your grandkids go blind Mike

but Romo doing when when Nietzsche is coming through the line unchecked I was throwing his balls catch it I was thinking Collinsworth for the oh split right split right on two is just

working right now. It is just working. They don't know what's hitting them. They're running reverses off split right too. They're doing anything they want. Half a Saturday Research. Albert S. Reddy, the producer, you know him from a little

movie called The Godfather. He wrote the story in the late 1960s. This is who Miles Teller plays in Yes. Yeah. In what? This was his story. He got a scriptwriter to do. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, saw him. Shot on location, Georgia State prison with the cooperation

of then-governor Jimmy Carter? I thought that was him. He just died. Ruddy. Yeah, ready. He just died like last week or the week before, yeah. This is like old school movie producer shit. I have an idea. And they wanted it to be funny

and Aldridge was not a comedy guy. So they did what he called schicktakes, which then eventually became what Jet Apatow and some other people would do. Just like keep the cameras rolling. Hey, Bert, just do some funny stuff. And then 70% and that ended up in there.

After the cast and crew left the prison, they left their stuff behind and the inmates played the troopers and it didn't go well. Yeah, Rick Tellender wrote a piece about this for Sports Illustrated in the 80s. 66 to nothing at the half, the convicts were up and they stopped again.

And a lot of troopers got hurt. Sounds like an amazing documentary. They were taking out all it is shit That's fucking hilarious Yeah Reynolds loved the prisoners And would sit with them during the meal breaks And hang out with them

And they were telling them Don't do that But he did it anyway And then there's this whole thing About how Aldridge didn't like Michael Conrad And called him the Polish princess And just fucked with him

The whole shoot And messed with them We haven't really talked about Nate yet No You want to do that now? I have a couple of nils It picks about neat.

And then when the Maserati got fished out of the water, the producer sold it for 7,000 of somebody. Ready to car in the movie. Yeah. Apex Mountain. Reynolds? I don't think, I don't, I think it's probably smoking the bandit. I mean, that movie was like one of the five biggest movies of 1977.

There's like a retrospective apex mountain where I think you could probably be like, this is it for him. But it's not for him, though. Yeah, because, like, this would probably be his most memorable, it's his best thing that he did. Well, ironically, his two most memorable movies after all these years are, or three, deliverance, longest yard, and boogie nights. Yeah.

And those are the first three if you're talking about the Burt Reynolds can. But he was the, you know how they do the movie stars of the list, of the year list? Yeah. Like, he was number, he was number one, like five years. He took it from Clint. Yeah, he took it really from this year on. Harry Caesar. Sure. Eddie Albert was on Green Acres, and that show was super popular.

Green Acres is where I was, I was like, what show was he on? Yeah. Michael Conrad at Hill Street Blues. James Hampton, it's probably Teen Wolf Dad, pretty iconic part. Yeah. Turns into a wolf. You're like, oh, my God. I mean, I think that's how most people know him.

Football movies, I think, yeah. I still feel like this is the best football movie. Did you put something above it? I was actually trying to think of, like, if anything even comes close. No, I think it definitely. Like, any given Sunday is awesome. Any given Sunday. Rudy is up there, I guess.

Remember the Titans? Varsity Blues. I have a soft spot for Wildcats. Friday Night White's the movie. It's much more competitive than I thought it was just at the jump. Like, there are going to be a lot of people that are going to look. Replacements, right? I love that movie.

I do like the replacement. Yeah, I like that movie a lot. No, this is the best one. 1974, Mazzarades, no question. Saturday Night Special as a movie song? Yeah. Yeah. It's been in other movies, though.

Right? I'm going to look it up. Hold on. And then two good ones for UCR. Anacott Steel. The guards played Anacott Steel, but I still think Wall Street is Apexbound for Anacot Steel. Yeah.

Yeah. Saturnite Special was also in blue collar with Harvey Kitell and Yafat Koto. Oh. Yeah. That's it? That's pretty much it. Okay.

Anacott Steel. That's, yeah. Blue Oyster loves Anacott Steel. Blue Oyster loves Anacoste. Apex Mountain. Horrible West Palm Beach incidents. No. Moralago.

Where did Kraft get his, his massage? That was Jupiter, was it not? That wasn't West Palm Beach? Was Tom Brady going to walk up to you and be like, Stop that shit. That shit, Simmons. It was Polk County that I remember

because we were trying to... Okay. So, it's still not Apex map for this. Hey, next category, Cruz or Hanks? This is a Cruz movie. It's a Cruz. I do think that there was...

Cruise is good as... I think this would be a fun Cruise movie. There was a point in their careers, even though it would have... Cruz could have played crew and Hanks could have played Scarborough. You know what I mean? Maybe like make Hanks look a little older,

but like sometime around League of their own sort of thing he was basically playing Scarborough anyway. Would have been cool. In the remake, Reynolds played Scarborough and Chris Rock played Caretaker. Yeah. I have no comment. Racehorse rock band wrestler or fantasy team name.

Mean Machine's an incredible racehorse name. Cruz is Paul Cruz. It's pretty interesting. he's very short. That's the only thing I was about to say. It's like it has to be like a Doug Flutty type. He's a Doug Flutty type of thing. Then you have him do the drop kick.

This is Doug Flutty. It all right moves. What's this position? Cornerback. Cornerback. Yeah. Will you guys go? I have a bunch.

We're not, my thing is we're not, if you're the warden, you don't just pay off the refs here. Like you're trying to fix everything else. You're trying to fix you don't pay the refs off. That's not going to happen. You would have thought the,

refs would have been planted the same way I hope they plant the refs for game seven of a Celtics Mavs finals So my big one is just like why is Like a former New York giant And a former NFL all pro Both in a Florida prison

Yeah And Nate Like crew doesn't know Nate's in the prison Like nobody's like Oh it's weird you're here Because there's another NFL player here The entire time until like mid You know midway through training

Yeah that's pretty weird And I just think that like the one thing that I wish they used more is the push-ups guy yeah he kind of he has like all these scenes in the swamp

and you're like this guy must be a major part of this film he must have been like difficult or something and then he disappears he's like on the side line and the warriors who just disappears halfway through the movie showing what a good athlete he is the entire time and then

yeah after the mud stuffing incident he should black the field ball yeah um would the warden really care about the semi-proteam this much of this random fucking prison? This is the highlight of his week.

Interesting. Interesting, though, because, you know, in Angola State Penitentiary, there's the Crunch Bowl, which is, where I'm from, which is a big, huge deal amongst the prison in the football. And if there's competition and to be had out there, he might. Because this is the same premise from any given, not any given Sunday, from, with Denzel's joint. The warden cares so much about basketball.

Right. Well, the governor cares in that place and the warden facilitates it, I guess. So it's also in early 70s, it's like you're basically finding out about sports scores the next day anyway, right? You're not watching highlights a night. And if you live in central Florida, I don't know if there's any pro teams in central Florida in the early 70s, is like the buck's there yet. So you're pretty much like this might be the only game in town. I really care about just 70 pro team.

All these movies we love, the warden's always up to more stuff than just like being some random evil guy who runs the prison. He's always trying to... I also care about trying to figure out how to make the prison bigger. Becoming Bear Bryant. Yeah. Or like he cares about something else. Seems to me like when I watch prison documentaries,

the warden's like, it's a 9 to 5 job, then I go home. Somebody died in prison again? Fine. I'll see you guys tomorrow. Caretakers murder. Would it work out this perfectly? I mean, I get... Just inject some stuff in a light bulb.

Guy turns it on and he just flames becoming out of it. Yeah, he's just on fire. It's a pretty serious piece of arson that Unger pulls off. I guess, you know, 70s wiring. It just seems like somebody would catch him coming out somewhere and stick him five times, and that's how you got. Shot car, it's just like five quick ones. There's a one to pick I had was that confusing hierarchy for the meat machine, coaching staff. Yeah, Scarborough, but really Paul.

crew. Yeah, it's like Nate's the head coach, but then Paul introduces him as like my assistant. He changes it immediately. He says, you're the head coach. It's going to happen with JJ Redick in LeBron. This is my assistant, JJ. No, no, no, no. I've been my head coach. Oh, one last nitpick. They're from the Chicago Youth Authority, the black inmates. Yeah, why are they in Florida? Why they incarcerated in Central Florida? What happened? Great question. They round them up. It's a state prison. It's not a Fed, right?

It's not a federal prison, so what's the deal? My son had a nitpick. Oh, interesting. He loves, he's listening to a couple rewatchables. I think it's the only content I've ever made that he's consumed. He likes nitpicks. He wanted to, he didn't understand why they didn't defer when they won the coin toss. I was telling him in 1974, nobody thought that way.

Nobody thought they wouldn't like it. Also, I don't think the guards were like, God, this one's really, this game's a real coin toss. That got a shut up, Ben, for me. Split right on two somehow was a QB reverse pass. Yeah. Kind of need more, a couple more words in there. The terminology wasn't... Like, the Philly Special was like,

we're running the Philly Special. We're trying to keep this as straightforward as possible. He says that in the first practice. He's like, we're not going to get into a lot of, like, advanced. But if you're running the Philly Special, it's not split right on two. No. But I don't think they can pack in shanny verbiage to this

where they're like Spider-3-Y banana. you know into this and they're going to know what they're talking about right on two is not complicated enough split right on two is just that's you're calling out the formation in I know I got it's on two I've played Madden I know I know what it is yeah and then I have a lot of questions about the comeback so they're on 35 13 with 11 minutes left Nate gets a TD to get the onside kick quick drive reverse run TD this is my thing 35 27 5.04 left. We assume they get a defensive stop.

They don't show it. They don't. They could cut right to them having a ball game. Cut to a drop kick on 4th down from the 33. Now it's 3530. They get another defensive stop that we don't almost with a had to have been a turnover at this point. Either turnover or a stop or another on-side. They haven't used their

time-outs because he uses all his time-outs in the last drive. So Canauer isn't even eating clock with like... Well, so then it goes... It's 35-30 and it's fourth and 21 after he keeps throwing into the guy's balls. Which is the clock. The biggest nitpick. Yeah.

Time of the game. Do that when it's 35, 13. Fourth and 21, they show the clock, there's 240 left. So in this less than two and a half minutes, they get two defensive stops. They run four plays for a drop kick, and then he throws the ball on the guy's things. So was Captain Canauer, like the worst game manager of all time? Would he just throw it on every down? For a thing that's so meticulously laid out,

the fact that it's like, oh, they got the ball back again after like a quick stop, it's like, what's he doing? The only thing that makes it sort of plausible is that the warden was on Canauer's ass about sucking. Running up the score? Oh, because do you think he started, he's tried to spread the field and run like... He's trying to get...

Go and beat the spread. Yeah, he wants to beat the spread. and then also Canauer might be that stupid because remember the warden wanted to take it from Canauer and then give it to Paul Crew. Well, actually found out the answer. Okay, what's the answer? Kyle Shanahan was in a time machine

and went back to 1974 and fuck the game up. No, seriously. Yeah. That's what ChatGBT told me. That would be the program two is set with the contemporary Niners and Doc Brown comes. to Kyle Shannon is like,

Kyle! We have to go back to Shikers State Penitentiary. The Cheerios just texted me. So anyway, I think that's the right answer that they're trying to run up the score. So instead of just running out the clock

and winning by five, they're trying to play a little hero ball. Yeah. I would have liked to have seen a couple defensive plays. Just like maybe two. Sequel Prequel Prestige TV all black castor, untouchable.

This should have been my hottest take. I think I'm okay at this point, 50 years later, if they did a basketball remake. I was trying to think of a way... I think it has to be basketball. What do you replace the yard with? Like, is it...

Just to be like, the longest what? And it's a basketball prison movie. The longest three? Yeah. But I think it would have my attention if it was whoever famous, A-lister, and it was like

it's basketball, it's convicts against the guards, it's a disgraced NBA star, it's like, okay. And then, but you flip the races, so rather than them having to get the black guys on the team, they got to get the Aryan brotherhood guys to play. They got to get the foreigners. Or the Serbian guys. They've got

the Serbian. They got to get the it's like, hey man. It's the Yorkich brothers. We don't have, we don't have enough. We don't have enough talent, man. The guys from the Eastern Block over there. They're over there. And Nicole Yolka, she did a screen debut? How did we get a bunch of guys from Chicago?

That's true. That's true. It was the same thing. So they're like, they've been playing. Serbian pipeline. Yeah, they've been playing Euroleague. Like, okay. Yeah.

I love it. That actually would be hilarious. I thought you were going to have like a black dude has to go up to the Aryan Brotherhood and be like, do you guys want to play hoops against the guards? Now, if you're going to recruit the Aryan Brotherhood, you specifically have to get Ed Norton's character from American. He's got a juice again. He's got, he's got,

because he's got that one unstoppable move and he's already above the rim. What's sad is we're going to do American History X for the rewatchables at some point this year just to do the basketball scene for an hour and a half. An abomination.

One of my favorite movies of all time. Is this movie better with Wayne Jenkins, Danny Treos, Sam Jackson, J.T. Walsh, Byron Mayo, Harley Mays, Evil Laughing, Ramon, Raymond, the Hanson Brothers, or Philip Bicker Hall.

I think the handsome brothers, honestly. Like, having the handsome brothers be on this football team would be iconic. Yeah, they could have had two extra scenes. Especially like if they put them in all three of them in that thing that Bert Reynolds had to go. What was that

called? The hot box. The hot box. They hot boxed all three Hanson brothers. Just one Oscar who gets it. Definitely Reynolds. Definitely Bert, yeah. Unanswerables. Oh my God, I got so many. Can I start? Yeah, go. What's the score if crew doesn't throw the third

quarter? Yeah. Yeah, it feels like they win by 10. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know why they didn't have more points than the first quarter.

I mean, they were basically like they get their asses kick the first quarter and then they just start really turning it on in the second. If he,

if you look at what they do in the fourth quarter, like imagine if that was their second half game plan, they just smoked those guys. Their defense is playing amazing, frankly. My question,

who could the guards actually beat? They literally put the team together. In four weeks. In four weeks and they beat them they're the national

runners up. Yeah. Like who are they who are they playing against? Obviously not. I have one more for you. Yeah. What was the day after

take economy inside of prison? Like what's prison's version of first things first leading with? Are they are they saying does crew still have

something to prove? Right. Are they mad at the treatment of Buganski? Right. They're saying that they're Crew crossed the line. That's coming up next.

There was a point in the second half of the game where it looked like crew was trying to throw the game. He'd never do that ice pick. Are they saying that ice pick? Is prison Nick Wright? Like, crew was carried by Nate and Granny. Coming up next. Stephen A. Shank.

Prison Nick Wright and Stephen A. Shank. Prison Nick Wright. I should call Tyler Parker right now and do that show. I had a couple. Just like, so crew played in the, he says he played in the NFL for 11 years, and then he said he had an eight-year exile after he played.

He hadn't picked up a ball in eight years. That puts him in his early 40s, but it seems like he's like 35 in this movie, right? Yeah. He doesn't seem like he's... It's so hard to tell guys in the 70s because they all look 40. He thought the math was a little left.

He immediately lost like a decade off of his face when he shaved. Yeah, right. Yeah. Did Red from Shawshank just rip off caretaker? Did Stephen King see this movie and it was like Red's going to be caretaker? I think prison fixer is like a really reliable. Yeah, because it's a pretty common trope.

Maybe that could be your prison persona. You could be the guy could get stuff. But you could also get posters. You can get. You think guys in prison are really hard up for posters now? Transistor radios. Air pods. Can you imagine bringing somebody a poster right now?

And check it out. It's shaking me. Kathy Ireland's swimsuit issue. Lightly used. We have to figure out Cruz's, Paul Cruz stats, right? I had 14 for 23, 225 yards, two TDs, two picks, and a fumble. At QBR, though, we took a real hit in the third quarter. But the rushing, it's like a Lamar Jackson type of game.

I think he's like 17 for 99 rushing. I think he ran. Maybe more. Maybe so. And the TV. Like 17 for 119? Yeah. Something like that.

It's like a Lamar. It's like a good November Lamar game. Yeah. Okay. Okay, Stephen A. Shank. What do you think I speak? I speak. Couldn't be stopped.

You're not going to win in the playoffs with a running QB is all I'm saying. Coming up next. Will the warden have Kenauer killed tomorrow? Best double feature. choice with this movie. Smoking the Bandit? Just go full Burt Crosma? Yeah, I think a Burt double, I think North Dallas 40. Slapshot?

North Dallas 40 was mine. Well, because did we pair that with Slapshot? Yeah. Because I thought about it, and 70s football movies, now North Dallas 40 and Heaven Can Wait, those are after this one? Yeah. Those are my favorite 70s football movies. Ah. The three of those movies.

Love North Dallas, love Heaven Can Wait. So, like, one of those movies I would pair with it. The Indian Red So Montanao word for what happened the next day. I wrote down, crew gets framed for 12 different murders and assaulted and probably sexually assaulted.

And some bad things happened to him. I just had to... The warden's like just ruined this guy. Like you guys, crew was in jail forever. Crew never got out. He's dead within probably a couple weeks. And that's, I didn't get to say during the nitpick.

I have such a crazy nitpicks, such a crazy time like accepting that punching the warden once was worth 30 years of your life, right? And then at the same time, crew doing this,

I know he had to not tell out his guys, but crew's fucked. Yeah. Like, crew's done. He has to escape. Longest yard, too, is they just have to fucking escape. Yeah, Cruz finished, bro. The ward has threatened him so many different times. That would have been a good segment for

prison first take. Yeah. What does crew do? What's crew do now? I think he has to escape, I expect. What do you think, I was trying to figure this out. What kind of season you think the guards have in the southeastern? This sent them in a tailspin. Yeah, they went three and eight. That's another, that's another topic.

Do we have a QB controversy? Does Can the guards recover? Can the guards recover from this? Did Canauer do enough? It's like a Pennix cousin situation? What piece of memorabilia would you want from this movie? I think some of the memorabilia was in an auction, and I missed it. Was the game ball in?

an auction? I think the crew jersey and the game ball were in there, but the crew jersey would be the piece, I think, right? A non-torn mean machine, 22, the black one. That would be quite a flex if I showed up in the torn mean machine jersey. You were like, I got this on an auction site. What do you have for Coach Finstock Award for Best Life Lesson? Oh, I got the Nate speech where he goes, you spend 14 years in this tank, you begin to understand that they've, you've only got two things they can't sweat out of you or beat out of you, your balls? It's a good one. I liked when caretakers, one thing that really sets up and kind of undergirds the movie

is caretaker explaining why football is so important. Oh, yeah. Like when he's talking to him. Like when you, because you shave points, that's why we work. You shave points, that's why. And that kind of sets Cruz's character on like not being able to sell the guys out at the end. That's why because he kind of learns that lesson inside. this movie's an A plus.

Who won the movie? It's clearly Bert Reynolds. Can I throw one... Just I'm just throwing it out there for Al Reddy. A, R-I-P. B, a producer made The Godfather. He's like, huh?

And he just has like this, the foresight to put Aldrich with Reynolds, this story, telling it the way they tell it. No holds barred. Worts and all. I like it. I like the idea that there's like

a kind of like, the most powerful people in Hollywood were like, this is the kind of movie I want to make. What a career, too. Like, obviously he just passed away, but like Million Dollar Baby, this movie, like The Godfather movie, this is like long, expansive, amazing career, man.

But it's Bert. Million Dollar Baby will not be on the rewatchables. Yeah, do we tell you what we did to Jomey? What? So Jomey had never seen a million dollar baby. Oh, no. He had never seen it. You told him he had to see it?

So, Jomey, got to watch Million Dollar Baby. So awesome. Like, Jomey had never seen it. like Jomey, watch the movie. It's a boxing movie. It's about the lady that takes a boxing in Clint Eastwood. And he's like, why do you guys want me to see it so bad? It's like, what happens in it?

I'm like, nothing. He's scarred. Because in no way in life do you think that that's the turn that the movie's going to take? He was... I told him to this day, I remember being in the movie theater and, like, at the entire theater just being like, what the fuck? I saw it in the Grove, and I've never been more unhappy at the Grove. The Grove is the happiest place.

It's just unhappy. Yeah, it's like, what the fuck? What the shit? And then you got, what, 20, 30 minutes of just brutality? Jomi was, he was shocked and stunned. That's a really fun idea, like a series of making people see movies that they think are going to turn out a certain way. We did this with Hardball. Oh, that's what we did.

We made people watch Hardball that made them react to Gee Babies. Oh, that's right. Tragic death is Hardball, yeah. Reckley and For a Dream. It's hilarious. You gotta see it. I'll check it out. Jared Lado and Jennifer Conno, they were great.

At the end of this, we're gonna, because Craig's not here, but Craig's gonna put his take on the longest yard at the end of this. So shout out to him. Thanks to Gahau and Jack for producing. We will see you next week for the last episode of 70s sports movie month. I don't even know what the movie is, but I had a great time. Thanks, guys. Absolutely.

So I had never seen the original, but I remember watching. and enjoying the remake with Adam Sandler growing up. I'm sure that's kind of sacrilege to hear, but that is the reality we live in. Like the guy said, I think the final 40 minutes of this movie were great and really rewatchable. I think the first half of the movie

might be a little aged out now, unfortunately. Just some 70s movies, they have a timeless quality to them. But I think you can really feel that this movie is 50 years old in the first hour. You know, the opening scene kind of feels like you're on a soap. opera set. The language is obviously

incredibly outdated. And just the pacing in some of the prison scenes, you know, like the guys out in the swamp pouring mud into each other's shoes. You can really feel it in those scenes in my opinion. But the concept overall is this movie is so great. I almost wish it was made 10 years later.

I know Bill was saying that this is the first great modern sports movie, but I feel like if this came out in the mid-80s, it would be much more relevant today. The 80s and 90s kind of feel like a time when concept and execution was in the sweet spot. And I think it would have helped the first half of the movie keep up with the second half. With that said, the football is clearly the piece that's aged the best. It still,

uh, it still has kind of a different pacing and editing and different music cues than a, you know, a more modern movie would. And you can feel it all the way through. But in a typical rewatchable's fashion, I watched the movie. And as soon as I went back an hour later to start grabbing clips to put into the episode, I found myself liking every scene more and more the second time. Um, I love that most of these guys are just out there playing real football. And you can really tell. And it looks great. And most of the time, it's hard to tell who's an actor and who is a football player.

And that's another reason why I love older movies is nobody looks like an actor in these movies. Nowadays, you see Glenn Powell or Ryan Gosling, and you know those guys are actors. You know those guys have, have, like, wanted to be an actor their whole life. They've been in Hollywood. They've been in the Hollywood machine. And they look like it. It's much more manicured. Bert Reynolds and Harrison Ford and Paul Newman and Brando,

obviously all very good looking guys, but they looked like real guys that were plucked off the street when they were like 30 years old and thrown in front of a camera because they had charisma and then became movie stars. And even how you behave as a movie star on screen is kind of different. I feel like Reynolds in this movie is so quiet and still and reserved.

And he has like a stoic star power to him that feels extinct now. A couple other things that I love. The football, once again, honestly, very accurate. They ran a reverse on a kickoff, a few more reverses on offense, some Josh Allen like QB sneaks, a receiver back shoulder like Rogers, Jordy Nelson play at the end there. It was all great.

I love seeing the big guy that people my age will only know from Happy Gilmore, the giant nail in the head guy, and you can count on me in the parking lot. That guy found out his name is Richard Keel, wonderful seeing him. I will say I wanted more out of Paul Cruz speech at the end. I don't know once again if that's sacrilege, but in a Reynolds fashion, I guess less is more. And maybe that was more emblematic of like these stoic stars of the 70s. But he really doesn't say a whole lot.

I think my expectations were a little high after hearing Bill and them talk about this speech at the end. He says it's like 15 words. He's like, all right, let's get out there. Let's win for these three guys. Let's go. And then they kind of run back out there. I wanted a little more out of that. And then lastly,

I don't know if this is a hot take, but it's clear Paul should have thrown the game. I mean, he listened to the pop who's been in jail for 30 years, took his advice so he could win a single football game. Paul crude be out in 18 months if he just blew that game. Kind of an obvious decision there, clearly not worth it getting swept up in the moment. And then the only other thing I will say that I couldn't get out of my head during the movie is much like Bill Hader and Al Pacino. I sometimes couldn't get Norm MacDonald out of my head watching Bert Reynolds. The great Norm McDonald, to be honest, my first experience, my first time seeing what Bert Reynolds sounded like or even really looked like or really even learning who he was, was me watching

old S&L tapes as a kid and watching Norm McDonald do the Bert Reynolds character on Jeopardy. So it's always weird when, you know, that was my first experience with Burnton. Reynolds was a fake Norm McDonald, Bert Reynolds. And now I'm going back and having to watch them and weirdly trying to blend those two things together and also separate them. So that's my review. All right. We'll see you next time.