The Rewatchables - ‘There’s Something About Mary’ With Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, and Sean Fennessey

Episode Date: May 5, 2026

The Ringer’s Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, and Sean Fennessey try to figure out how Ted got the frank above the beans after rewatching the 1998 comedy classic ‘There’s Something About Mary,’ starring Ben Stiller, Cameron Diaz, and Matt Dillon. Producers: Craig Horlbeck, Chia Hao Tat, Eduardo Ocampo, and Matt Pevic Get more value with the McValue menu at McDonald’s Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The rewatchables is brought to you by The Ringer Podcast Network where you can find the big picture with Sean Fentasy, now newsletter writer. Yes, that's right. Projections. That's right. How's that going for you? Very well. As you know, writing is very easy. And so it's been coming along nicely.

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Hardest I've ever laughed in a movie theater, Mount Rushmore. Naked gun Okay There's something about Mary The Hangover And Buffalo Bill and Silence of the Lamps That's my top four Three of them were comedies

Including this one Hereditary In the like in the in the mix there at all or no Horatry Bing! Got it! No those are my top four But I saw this in the theater

With my future wife and just raucous laughter. People just love this movie. How long had you guys been together when you saw this? The first summer we were together. Oh, wow. One of the first movies you guys saw together probably. Yeah, one of them.

Did you think of it like a test in any way? Like, if she likes this, we're good? You know, I didn't think of that at the time, but I do feel like I was probably destined to be with somebody who would have laughed during a lot of this movie, right? If you're sitting next to somebody who's like, ugh, probably a bad sign. What about UCR?

Where did you see it? Still one of the most memorable theater-going experiences in my life. I saw this one. I believe in Boston, I think almost as soon as it came out. And it was like, it was like watching like people go through like a religious experience, like falling into the aisles,

people crying like sodas and popcorns flying in the air. And that's that kind of two-track mind you have watching it where you're laughing at it and you're also like, I can't believe they're pulling this off or I can't believe they're going for this. So, yeah. just definitely like burned into my memory. I vividly remember seeing it for the first time.

I saw with 10 friends. It was in the summer of 98. I was 15 turning 16. And it was like going to church for a bunch of teenage boys. It was like the apotheosis of what was happening in comedies at this point. Yeah. And raucous laughter. I think as I look at the movie now, which I still think is so funny.

I actually don't think it's really lost. an inch of how much it makes me laugh. But I don't think I really understood what the movie was trying to accomplish at all. Like, I could only react to the set pieces. Like, I wasn't thinking about the ideas. I wasn't even thinking about the weirdness of the characters. And so it's funny that it still has the power

that it had when I was with 10 other dudes in a movie theater. It was a really weird rewatch because I was like, oh, I'm going in and it's Franken Beans and it's hair gel. And I was like, is Matt Dillon in this movie one of the greatest comedic performances in cinema is? street coming out. I was like, this guy is throwing a perfect game in this movie. Yeah, I remember Goldman wrote about this in a couple different ways, but he was obsessed

with this movie, how smartly constructed it was. He did the more adventure of the screen trade and did a whole thing about the zipper scene and just how brilliant it is. I think that's what it's been on a million times. I always get sucked in. The structure of it, how smart it is, how well constructed it is from start to finish, how good the character's in. Like we had the Dion Waiters Award. It's probably 10 Deon Waiters in this movie. And they're all coming in hot.

And the movie just doesn't let up. And I don't think it peters off at all. No. The first hour is probably a little funnier. But I think it just rides. And then you have like great performances, including Cameron Diaz, who was like, became an A plus Lister after this movie.

The funniest thing about, watching it this time was how gutsy it is for Stiller to basically do this movie and in the entire film is him reacting to stuff. It's like it is the most straight man lead performance in a comedy

that I can think of in a lot of ways because it's so thankless he's going to basically get his balls caught in his zipper. He's going to blow his load and he's going to get like run through the ringer this entire movie and everybody else is going to get to have. Don't forget about rest.

The bath houses in the 90s. Hey, wait your turn. Dude, Jenkins in this movie. But it's just such a great lead performance because he's just like, I'm going to let everybody else cook while I move through this movie. But by the same token, you can feel him

making a choice that's like, I found my movie star persona. This is the movie that unlocks the similar kind of character he plays in like 10 consecutive studio companies after this. So it's actually really smart his part because before this, you know, he's in some interesting movies and he's still trying to figure out he's balancing a lot of these like independent dramas as the same year as permanent midnight,

same year's less than zero. Don't forget your friends and neighbors. Your friends and neighbors. Jason Patrick told him a long story about the guy in high school. And he's already directed reality bites and he's had the TV show, but he, this isn't the guy from meet the parents, you know, this isn't the guy from night at the museum yet. So I was going to do this later, but we can do it now. He had not carried a movie yet.

He was Ben Steller show, Reality Bites, heavy weights, if he's, Lucy fell, flirting with disaster, directed the cable guy. The year before, he did episodes of Friends and Larry Sanders. He was the second lead of Zero Effect in 1998 with Bill Palman and Ryan O'Neill. I don't know if Sean owns it on 4K. Really funny movie. Yeah, it's like a detective comedy that's played very straight. But I didn't think Ben Storer could lead a movie.

I didn't know what he was. And he goes from this 11-year run of, there's something about Mary, Meet the Parents, Zoolander, Royal Tannenbaum's, along came Polly, Starskin Hutch, Anchorman, Dodgeball, Meet the Fokkers, Heartbreak Kid, Tropic Thunder. Just all in a row. Yeah. And he becomes the biggest comedy star we have, which I think the odds in 1998 of like our next giant comedy star would be Ben Stiller would have been 100 to one.

No. I never would have guessed it. He was doing things outside of movie roles, though. Like he was hosting the MTV Movie Awards and he was doing that the famous, the Tom Cruise stunt double thing. Oh, yeah. He was doing. They did have cool guy, cool comedy guy energy.

Yeah, yeah. He was making himself known. But I almost could have seen him having like a secondary like Albert Brooks type career where it's like kind of a fringe character who directs his own stuff, but it's like a very niche kind of thing. So for him to be this, this mainstream is pretty surprised. Well, that's why your friends and neighbors is so interesting because it almost seems like he's wondering if he should be a serious actor.

The permanent midnight too. Yeah. Both of those movies are very tough hangs. Yeah, very serious like looking at like sexual perversion among the things. couples, looking addiction. You can feel him trying to figure out what's the right path for me. Which ironically, John Stewart was a little like that

too. He was, and he was one of the runners up for this movie, but he was also like, am I an actor? What am I? Stiller, I remember when he was on SNL for like the all-time cup of coffee. I don't even think it was half a season, but did Eddie Munster, and

he did a Tom Cruise and people knew he was Stiller and Mara's kid. I never saw the Ben Stowe show I'm not going to pretend I was like oh yeah I didn't even really remember that happening That was on Fox right yeah it was on Fox

It kind of came and went And it wasn't until reality bites Which we talked about There's some funny stuff on that show though And it had you know Cross Nodin Kirk and Gene Garofalo It had a bunch of people who went on to be like Did it have like a crazy writing staff too probably

I think so yeah Funniest movies of the 1990s I'm going to give my list from 7 to 1 Funniest movies of the 199 you're just going to give this way right now now? Yeah. You should put this on substack.

This is going to be the new running joke. I can't tell if you like it. You'll have to read it on projections this Wednesday. And number one, coming Thursday. Actually, I'll give you a top eight because I bump dirty work. Dirtywork eight. We've done that and rewatchable.

Hell yeah. Groundhog Day 7. Happy Gilmore 6. Wainsworld 5. Austin Powers 2 4 I think that was 1999 Dumb and Dumber Tommy boy

There's something about Mary That's what I have Sorry Billy Madison Was not on the list Was not That's my top thing Doesn't mean that This shouldn't have had 20 movies

But I think Mary was One of the funny I think it was the funniest But 90s leading to me To my next list Funniest movie by decade Oh how far back Did you go

70s Okay Okay They didn't know comedy in the 60s. Funniest movie of the 1930s go. Is that bringing a baby in the 30s? Sure, yeah. 39. Got it. Nailed it.

Got it. Is it 39? I don't even know. I think it is. What do you have for the 70s? The funniest movie, the 70s? Slash shot. Funniest movie. Slavshot. Interesting.

Yeah. But here's, my comedy tastes tend to go more towards character stuff than it is like Tommy Boy. Like, I think. I would say Young Frankenstein. It's probably my favorite. All right, I had Animal House.

1980s, Caddyshack, naked gun, and airplane were my three finalists, and I need more time. But those were the three I had now. When will you be deciding? I don't maybe like seven podcasts from now. I'll let people know where I land. You should be doing a pod with Van and Joe

and be like, just want you guys to know I've decided. I talked about this with Chris and Sean. I don't know if you knew, but three weeks ago. 90s, Mary. 2000s gets really hard with Anchorman Super Bad in The Hangover, and I need more time to decide on that. I think it's Anchorman, too. The Hangover, which has many complexities in this day and age,

did have a very similar feeling to this movie in theaters. In theaters where it was like, this is a rock concert. Yeah, like when he gets teased in the hangover, you're just like, In the face! Not at the table, Carlos is still the funniest thing that's ever happened. Yeah. And in 2010s, I actually think it's bridesmaids. Is Stepbrothers 2010s?

No. Oh, that's 2008. Oh, so stepbrothers could be in the 2000s, too. What's your 2000s movie, Craig? My God. I have to pick one? Yeah. Now, quickly.

Bill gets to wait seven weeks. You go now. I mean, Anchorman, I think, has, like, the most quotes that I've taken with me throughout my life. And then maybe super bad in forgetting Sarah Marshall. Oh. Yeah. It's impossible. Stepbrothers and hangover is so good.

You almost need more time with it. I do think it's bridesmaids for the tens. He's any time. That would be good. Bridesmaids is so fucking funny. It's like clearly the champ of that year. Anyway, I don't know if you had any quibbles. Wasn't prepared for this query.

Do we have a 2020s? Do we make comedies anymore? Do we have comedies anymore? What happened to comedies? Yeah, we just, well, Craig and I were just talking about one that's coming out in June called the Invite, which was pretty funny. Yeah? Yeah.

Seth Rogan, Olivia Wilde, Edward Norton, and Penelopee Cruz. God, what is the funniest movie of the 2020s? How sad is that? We can't even think up top of our... heads. There was just a big, bigish comedy, smallish comedy this year?

What was the 2026 comedy? The one comedy. Well, didn't the Naked Gun remake came out? That was in 2025, yeah. But you said you were not, like a comedy this year

that did well? Yeah. Well, the drama is pretty funny. Yeah. Is it? I haven't seen that. Not step brother's funny.

Not a different kind of funny. Cool festivals. Like you guys. It's a movie that made $100 million dollars that's been out for like weeks. You could have just got some. The drama?

Yeah. It's the fucking basketball playoffs. I'm not going to do. It was up. The basketball playoffs. It was Pattinson and Zendaya. You're the consumer. You're the guy who's got four screens.

I'll see it when it's on a streamer. Did you see Netflix's new film? Oops, I pooped my pants and also killed my daughter's boyfriend? Does that exist? Have you, if you go on public with your... That's a great title. They should do that. But it's like, if you talk publicly about how you watch things called, like, I'm my own mother on Netflix,

and you're like, you're sending texts? I've never seen that one. if you're like, you guys up on this yet? Like me and Sean are sitting around. I'd like to let you guys know with the common people are watching. Nobody dumps my daughter is something you guys need to know about. Yeah, it's always like...

Husband, father, killer. I just stabbed a drifter with a tire iron and also I found my mom. 2032, nobody dumps my daughter rewatchmoles. Nobody dumps my daughter is the best title of all time. Just wait until we're new to our rewatchables next year. This movie laid the ground

for the 2000s, R-rated comedy boom. Yeah. Really starting with American Pie and Road Trip, but then old school really officially kicks it off. But I think this pulled the seal off, comedies cannot be R-rated because they won't make as much money. This movie made a shitload of money. See, I thought of another movie that I chose for my double feature,

but I feel like is in concert with this, which was American Pie. I felt like because American Pie came one year later, and it was like those two summers. But did American Pie... part of the reason to push the envelope was because this movie pushed the envelope

and they were like no maybe he can fuck a pie yes totally I think it did help yeah I think that's right the stories about the test screenings for this movie and how the Farrelly brothers

were like completely open to the idea of like maybe this will be too far and maybe this won't work and then them showing it and Peter Chernin just being like yeah don't don't change a thing

I was disgusted but don't change the thing right well they filmed the two different versions of the hair gel you know, that was the deal they made with Cameron Diaz. It will have this too and if it doesn't work or however they did it, not knowing if people would be like,

that's disgusting, I'm leaving. And it was the opposite. It was, and if you watch that scene when it cuts to her with the hair, like not a lot's happening in the dialogue because they know how funny it is and know everybody's going to be laughing. So it kind of doesn't even matter what they're saying. Yeah, I have no idea what's said nuts.

Yeah. Cameron Diaz, who did the mask in 1994, out of modeling. It was like the first thing she ever did. 1996, she's the one, which I consider the dream team too. A lot of people think it's the Olympic team that year we had.

No. Shack and no. It's actually... Burns. Burns. McLeon. Maxine Bonds. Aniston.

Cameron Diaz. Leslie Mann. And Leslie Mann. Tom Petty on the soundtrack. Don't forget. Don't forget. Amanda Pee. Amanda P.

That's my 1996 dream team. My best friends, wedding. Good film. She's fantastic in that too. Really good. And then Mary in 98 and she becomes a star ends up in being John Malcovic,

any given Sunday, Charlie's Angels, Shrek, Vanel Sky, tough casting and gangs in New York. Maybe that's a redo. Sure. And it just keeps going from there. And she also had high profile

relationship, Sean, with Matt Dillon, Jared Lato, Justin Timberlake, and A-Rod. You know what I've learned? She doesn't have a type. She married Benji Madie. She just love his love for her. Doesn't matter who it is.

She could have fallen for Craig. Could have been anybody. Matt Dillon, Jared Lato, Justin Timberlake, and A-Rod. That would be weird if she fell in love with 13-year-old Craig in 1999. I was five. Five, okay. It would have been really weird. Is she married now?

Benji Madden. Yeah. Well, I mean, you know. You're not checked up on her. She's back, by the way. She's back. She was retired. She was in the Johnny Hull movie, right?

And one last year, Jamie Fox. She was. Back in action was. last year and this year was outcome. Where do you stand on Mary as the perfect girl? Because this movie does a lot of tricks. I think it's the most interesting conversation that's probably come out of the

couple of decades of discourse about this movie is how knowing it is about the different ways you can read it. So you can read Mary as, I think there's a Dave Kerrline, the critic Dave Kerr who said that she was like a fantasy of flawlessness and that everything Mary does

is like the exact, dream scenario for a guy. Dave curse sounds like a fun hang. Very good critic. But then you could also flip it and say that the funniest thing about this movie is how it's the guys who are doing all the acrobatics to like bend their personas to what they think Mary wants from them. I don't know.

I mean... That's the ingenious idea of the movie, right? Is that she is supposed to represent this like ideal of male desire, right? Where it's like she's into sports. She just wants to eat hot dogs. Yeah, she loves beer. She golfs on interfaiths. free time.

You know? I really want to dive into this. Loves football. Yeah. 85. She's in on the Niners early. At one point she smells the dynasty. Do you want to come upstairs and watch a sports center?

Yeah. She has takes on Montana's draft status. She has a fucking great golf swing. Yeah. That's really her. Apparently they had a golf standby, stand in person. She over rotates, but yeah. And you think so?

Yeah. A CR with golf tips. Well, I've just been in the like the YouTube minds with golf. Talk, I mean, let's talk about it. I forgot your true passion. Let it go. Let it loose. I've been studying under the tutelage of a man named Mr. Tropicana.

Thank you. Who's taught me a lot about. When you say studying, you mean just watching his videos. Like, you don't know them. No, I don't go to Kavina to, like, get his tips. Great golf swing. Loves meat on a stick. Yeah, sure.

Really underrated cigarette smoker in this? I don't know if she deniered it. Did you see that? Which is odd for an orthopedic surgeon, even at night of me. Just she casually was like checking out people in the Copacabana. What bar was he in? I think so. Copacabana, yeah.

Great person. Works with special needs, adults. Gives apples to homeless people. I think that guy just is a guy with a boat. Is he homeless? He's not boatless. Yeah. Was he hanging out of?

I thought he was like the dockmaster. He's in the IMDB as homeless man. Oh, okay. So I don't know. Maybe it was a miscalculation. But yeah, she's basically great hang, laughing at everything. But the idea that all these guys have to lie about who they are and what they want to get her, even though she is the on paper, if only my wife could be like this.

Right. It's like the whole genius idea of the movie. These guys are all losers who don't really deserve her and they have to come up with these elaborate stupid ways to get her. Yes. That's, I think, the joke of the movie. Yes. And but it's like, I think that there's like, you could probably do the opposite read, which is like this isn't a real person. So then does the character work?

But I tend to believe the opposite. You know what? In the summer of 1998, I was just thinking about the laughter. Yeah. I think we all were. I definitely did not realize that this was a high-level stalker comedy in 1998. And that is what the movie really is. It's about a bunch of guys that are stalking this woman.

So, like, that's the funny, other funny thing is that you could say that this is like an update of a Preston-Stra. just plot, like, of, like, a real screwball comedy, like, you're never going to believe what happens next kind of story. But I do think that all the guys are, like, basically should be in jail by the end of the movie, including

Ted. I wrote down this is when Harry Metzelli for weirdos. I mean, that's really what the premise and plot of the movie is. Matt Dillon in an all-time elite scumbag in this movie. Phenomenal. And was dating Cameron Diaz in real life. career resurgence of

in and out wild things and there's something about Mary we just did wild things he as a kid actor he was in three SE Hinton movies he was in my bodyguard which was the first time I saw him

and women just love Matt Dylan drugstore cowboy right over the edge it's kind of all over the place with his IMDB with a lot of twists and turns he'd never really done a comedy like this before he was the original choice for

Butch and Pulp Fiction, which we talked about when we did the Pulp Fiction, that I think would have been an important thing for him. I think he would have been good in that part, too. I also don't know why he wasn't an entourage is their older brother, why he couldn't have come in and done a three-episode arc. Yo, bro, I can't believe you here.

Could think of a few reasons why he's... Would he be playing Matt Dillon? Or would you be playing drama's older brother? They are like their half-brother. Steve Drama? Steve Drama? Steve Drama. TV drama.

Weird career in the sense that it feels like there should have been a TV pivot to some sort of prestige show in like 2014 that never really happened. And I don't really know what he's been doing the last 15 years. But everybody likes Matt Dillon. He never did like his version of like

that Kevin Bacon show on Showtime or... Eight, nine years ago he did a Lars von Trier movie. The House the Jack Bill. Which is a... No, it was a... It was a movie. It's like a movie about a serial killer. It's a crazy movie. Oh, I thought it was a split-out. I never saw it. No, no. He did an Apple show with Patricia Arquette.

That was kind of like a crime show, like a noir desert show. Was it a show where somebody dies in the beginning and then you go backwards? It's called High Desert. Did they solve it? Well, I think they only did a season of it. I remember when I'm watching one. We'll never know. Craig. Have you seen that Apple show when somebody dies in the beginning? I think so, yeah. I saw that one. We don't know who did it, but then each episode. ends and then could have been that person.

And then there's another season. It's a whole new cast, but there's also a murder at the beginning of that season. It's spiritually under the same umbrella. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like the same theme song, but a little different every time. And every actor peaked like six years ago, but their agent definitely told them it was going to be a great idea. Yeah, I like that show. Matt Dillon feels like he, he's primed for a White Lotus appearance. That's the thing.

I feel like if Matt Lowe, if Matt Dillon gets dropped into any sort of cool, if he had been in beef, anything, people, the reaction would have been. Hey, Matt Dillon. Sure. I love Matt Dillon. But he's always kind of existed in that world where people like him. I don't know. I feel like he's two movies short, Sean.

I know what you mean. You know. It's a little like Mikhail Bridges on The Knicks right now. All right. Just settle down, please. It's only six years later that he's in Crash, which is a joke now, but at the time, one best picture. And he's the handsy police officer. And he's good in Crash.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Not a great character. Not a good character. But he's the performance. He gives a good performance.

But then after that, here are the movies he makes, after Crash. Loverboy, you seen that? Not the Kirstie Alley one. No. Factotum, which is a Bukowski adaptation. Herbie fully loaded. Umi and Dupree. Oh, yeah.

I don't mind you, me and Dupree. Nothing but the truth, the Cape Beck and Sale political drama. Old Dogs, with Robin Williams and John Travolta. I don't know. Old Dogs. Isn't that the motorcycle movie? No. No, that's wild hogs.

Oh, come on, Chris. Old dogs is about... It's wild hogs. Yeah, wildhogs and old dogs is a killer double, though. Takers? You seen takers? Thriller with Paul Walker. Couldn't he have been prisoners instead of you Jackman?

This is a rough 10 years. Is he in like 1-8-7? Or what is the thriller he's in? It's like Anthony Mackey one. That's pretty good where he plays like a... But the wheels have come off. Yeah, and he plays like an armored truck security guard. Yeah, that's called armored.

Yeah. He plays Mike Cochran opposite Lawrence Fishburn, Jean Renaud, Milo Ventimiglia, Skeet, Ulrich, and Columbus Short. Oh, okay. This is like when I texted you guys a couple days ago with Mark Wahlberg's IMDB in the 2020s, and it's like, when did Mark Wahlberg just give up?

It's seven straight years of just, ugh. Yep. It's just, oh, and I didn't realize it was over, but apparently it was. Sometimes I guess that happens. I think it's, I think for, do you want to have the Mark Wahlberg conversation or the Matt Dillon conversation.

Oh, either. Okay. The Mark Wahlberg thing, I think he used to work routinely with really interesting and challenging directors and now no longer does for the most part.

You know, Matt Dillon was in Asteroid City, the West Anderson movie. You didn't see that? We're really briefly, though, right? Like, he's the mechanic. He's the mechanic. He's phenomenal in this part. It's really, really funny.

I can't even think of anybody else who would have been good in this in the same way. So he's like always likable and interesting, and I think he's a good leading man in all those teen movies in the 80s. But do you think that because he was dating

Cameron Diaz, he felt like more free, he's never been this funny. Like, what explains, you know, deuce, deuce in the half? Like, his facility with the jokes is so good. They're changing their image.

Work for Rice. I think it's always fun when an action. is known for dramatic parts, does a comedy, and is in the comedy treating the part as seriously as he would any drama.

But he, Matt Dillon knows how fucking funny this is. But he's like, Pat Healy, private eye, who falls in love with his own subject. I'm like 110% committed to it. And even when he's mugging,

it's funny. But he's willingness to do it to put on the veneers and to wear the stupid shirts is just unreal. Or when Tucker's telling Mary, all the fake stuff about him. Like he killed the guy

and he's just in the car like like, like just he just knows the jig is up. He's really great in this. Do you feel like this movie like when you were like let's do something

there's something about Mary. I was like absolutely like this is such a singular experience watching this thing. Do you feel like its second life has been more muted than you would have thought

when you first saw it? I had a follow up related question to this. If you had to guess what number in terms of popularity is this movie for Cameron Diaz on Letterbox? Interesting. Because you could make the case this is her biggest and most important movie. I would have said the holidays first.

Holiday is ahead of it. Malcovich is ahead of it probably a lot of it. Charlie's Angels is probably ahead of it because people are dopes. That movie's awful. What else? How far is it? How far down is it? 14.

That's wild. How is it measured? people's star ratings. It's just how many people have starred the movie. Yeah, I think who like it, the ratings, all those things are taken into consideration. But it is, you know, you've got some weird outliers or you've got like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. She's in like one scene in that movie. But like, Gangs of New York is ahead of it.

The Mask is ahead of it. All the Shrek movies are ahead of it. Vanilla Sky is ahead of it. My best friend's wedding is ahead of it. In 1998, you know, we were like, not only is she the new Julia Roberts, she's like the new Audrey Hepburn. Like she's like, this is a person who's on the collision course with mega start-star. And from 1998, this movie is standing on its own two feet against Titanic Private Ryan and Armageddon. Titanic Private Ryan and Armageddon have gone on to all be rewatchables, I believe.

All be re-watched by people like routinely all the time. And this, I feel like when you mentioned it to me, I was like, oh, yeah. But I haven't watched this movie in forever for some reason. I think part of the problem with it. other than there's probably some stuff that people feel like has an age well. It's like big set pieces that people feel like they don't need to see it because they know what the set pieces are. Or it's like, oh, yeah, there's going to be the two scenes with the dog and there's going to be the one, the hair gel scene. And there's going to, you know, the zipper scene.

And I've seen that. But I don't think it gets enough credit for how smart the script is and how good the actors are in it. It also feels like it belongs to a different generation. Yeah. Because I was looking at the 98 movies that were comedies. there's something about Mary, Big Lubowski, Waterboy,

Rush Hour, wedding singer, Night at the Roxbury, half big, dirty work, and basketball. It just feels very 90s. You know,

and then... Yeah, but Lobowski has endured, you know, like, sometimes movies have endured. Yeah, I don't know why

this one didn't endure. Look at the Collins. Oh, it became, it was a cult movie that, you know, I think,

gruesome legs as the years past and has a bunch of fun people in it. I had the same thought though while watching it whereas like it has kind of turned into a little bit of an artifact which is an interesting for me it's probably one of the first examples of a movie that when it happened I was very aware of it I was consuming a lot of media around it a lot of reviews of it magazine stories about it and I felt like well this is just an absolute neutron bomb for a teenage boy like this is a huge thing and now just and I think

some of it is what you're describing but the thing about the stuff that is insensitive or has an age well or whatever is, the only people who are doing that stuff are the people who were meant to believe are buffoons in the movie. Like, the movie is relatively sensitive to some of the ideas that are it's portraying for the people who are impacted by it and understand that are in that world, the family, for example. It's all the guys who are made to be the butt of the joke throughout the movie who are the ones who are insensitive. So like, that can't be the only reason, right, why it's come down a little bit. I was also wondering, like, you know, it's such a sincere movie in so many ways, like the soundtrack, the colors of the movie, it feels very pop, it feels very

kind of weirdly optimistic when you're watching it. You kind of have a mild grin on even when it isn't one of the big set pieces. And for better, for worse, so much comedy has gravitated towards, especially on screen comedy, not only is it on TV, but it's like Nathan Fielder and Tim Robinson and this kind of like, if you're going to do something that's got an incredibly extreme psych gag, it has to be, like, really weird. You know, like, there can't just be, like, this is really funny that this guy thought, like, masturbating before a date was a good idea.

Yeah. But it would be, like... Flogging the Dauphin? Then he gets caught by, like, a local newspaper if it was Tim Robinson. Right, right. Yeah. Or just, like, wobbling back and forth.

You know? Oh, my God. Yeah. Stuff is just like, that's like three stooges. You know, it's just pure psychag comedy. Fairley Brothers, the dumb and dumber, kingpin, and there's something about Mary in a row, basically. But this is the...

They had to save themselves after Kingpin for the video. Yeah, Kingpin bombs, which I had forgotten. Just an all-time classic. I popped it in immediately after watching. There's something about Mary. I love that movie so much. That was Ed Dexter and John Strauss, Friends of the Fairleys wrote the script,

Farrellys bought it, ran with it, and they wanted to do something more for adults, Animal House style. And they knew this was their last chance, basically. This doesn't work. It's not going to happen. We'll take a break, and then we'll talk about a couple other things. including the Oscars for that year.

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You're among fans. So Goldman was adamant that this movie should have been nominated for best picture and that Cameron Diaz should have been nominated for best actress. I'll give you the best picture that year. Shakespeare and Love, Elizabeth, Life is Beautiful, saving Private Ryan, and the thin red line. Who you bumping, Sean? Easy, life is beautiful. Get it out.

Yeah. People, at the time. That also got nominated for directed, our director. He won for Best Actor. Best actress in a leading role. Quentin Poutre wins for Shakespeare in Love. Cape Blanchette, Elizabeth. Fernanda Montenegro for Central Station?

Where to go. What are your thoughts on that one? It's a Brazilian cinema classic. In fact, her daughter, Fernando Torres, was nominated two years ago for Best Actress. Streep, one true thing. Kind of like when Kobe would make the all- defense near the end of his career.

Just automatic nomination. This is the first I'm hearing of One True Thing. Yeah, I don't even remember what that is. Well, you haven't listened to our Merrill Street Hall of Fame then. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Just out at him sorry. It's basketball play.

Yeah. What is One True thing? Grinding tape. He missed the drama. I miss the Merrill Street. That's the one with William Hurt, right? Where she gets cancer, Merrill Street's character gets cancer. And Renee Zellweger has to come home to help take care of them.

Renee Zellweger, I think. Oh, my wife likes this movie. I know this movie. Very sincere drama. She gets nominated for that. Emily Watson and Hillary and Hillary and Jackie. But as we've discussed many times, the rewatchables, comedy

performances and comedies in general do not get treated with any sort of reverence from the Academy. It's a little harder to get Dylan into supporting actor, because it's Coburn, Duval for a civil action. Ed Harris-Truman showed

Jeffrey Rush, Shakespeare, and Loved Me is pretty amazing in that, and Billy Bob Thornton for a simple plan. So it's hard to know who you would kick out, but that's who I would, of the actors that I feel most passionately, that would be Dylan for supporting actor. I would have had Simple playing an Entrum and show in my best picture race that year, too. Well, if they had the nine films, I wonder if those two get added with there's something

about Mary. So anyway, nothing happens. They don't get nominated for screenplay either. 23 million dollar budget made $3.70. Crazy. Fourth biggest movie in 98. Roger Ebert, three stars. What's a blessed relief is laughter.

It flies in the face of manners, values, political correctness, and decorum. It exposes us for what we are, the only animal with a sense of humor. Hmm. We don't know that for sure. I don't know. I'm cooking. Could I add it a half star. William Goldman wrote, my choice for best picture was there something about Mary? I would have given it best actress and best screenplay as well.

The Academy is always ignored to the hardest genres to create comedies and adventure flicks. He just loved this movie. Anyway, categories. Most rewatchable scene. Piggy back ride into... He's only 230. huh? He's just like his back's destroyed by Warren. Just the noise of his back cracking when Warren jumps on it is very...

Well, I don't know when we want to talk about Warren, but... W. Earl Brown. I think Warren's incredible in this movie. I think it depends on what maybe some of your background is with the special needs community. We've had... My wife has that in her family, her uncle David. My dad worked with special needs people for 15, 20 years. I love the way to approach.

which is the whole concept in this. Like, you're always on Warren's side. I feel like they're not making fun of him anyway. Like, he's just a comedy machine. But then as the years passed, it became the Farallies have even talked about. I think it's just the issue of casting somebody outside of that. The Farley is basically in the 2010s, they're like, look, we tried a million people. This was the best performance.

It was a key part by the 2020s. They were like, yeah, we blew this. Yeah. And I get it. It's a complicated thing because, That was not how people were thinking about it at the time, that that's who should be cast in these parts. And that's changed pretty dramatically in Hollywood.

So it's really hard to come down on it. But that's, like I said, the movie I like is, the movie's not making fun of Warren. You could misconstrue it, though, if you were a teenager. I will say that. It was pretty easy for people that I knew to misunderstand what the movie was trying to do.

I know people who also have, like, special needs family members, what have you, who were upset by that. But it's just like, but it's just, it depends on your personal experience and your taste level and your, I think also like, it's a very different experience watching this movie in a theater and 350 people are clearly laughing at Warren. And you're like, that's fucked up versus like watching it at home and being like, I see what they're doing here and how they're kind of, they're not, they're not, they're celebrating this guy. They're not like making fun of them. Yeah. And the Farley's who have done this in a lot of their movies about all times. types of people and him and all different types of handicapped people.

He's actually the key to the movie because... He's the trustee. He's the barometer of which guy works. Him trusting Ted is the most important thing that happens in the movie. Yeah, and they build it up. Anyway, the prom invites really adorable too, in that first scene. All right. Ted shows up to take Mary to the prom. This is just an unbelievable seven minutes, five minutes, whatever it is. This is my most fun part about rewatching it is I had forgotten Keith David and Marky Post.

just crushing it. Keith David. The wedding photo. Flawless. Flawless in the scene. It immediately got like my energy up, just watching him fucking with Ben Stiller. The wedding photo of them from the 70s is funny.

Which was clearly taking like one minute before they started shooting. Yeah. When Mary comes down the stairs and Keith David goes, ah, shit, look at that. And then Warren attacking Ted is. so fucking funny. Him going to the bathroom. She's a dental

agenda. She'll know exactly what to do. And her answer is to get backteen. And then... When she sprays the backteen on him, I don't know what the technical name is when you're doing comedy to just keep adding layers and layers on top of the

same punchline where like... And then the fireman and then the cop. It becomes like naked gun for a second. Yeah. Like the cops climbing in through the window and the fire department shows up. It's so good. And Warren's throwing 110 because he hears the Franks and Beans. He starts yelling, Franks and Beans.

Though he was masturbating. It's hilarious. Lenny Clark pops in out of nowhere. This is just an A-plus comedy show. I just have no notes. Every part is great. And even when you see the zipper for a split second, they don't stay in it too long. It's like, oh, ow.

Also, just the decision to have every actor just be. playing their teenage self. You know what I mean? Like not having kids play the parts anyway and having Stiller as a teenager makes his character so funny immediately. Yeah. I think Keith David,

especially wanting to get in there and take a good look at it. I think he puts his glasses on. It just cracks me out. It's just the perfect comedy scene. And then it goes right into the therapy appointment with our guy Richard Jenkins.

This is like a dark horse for me, but Jenkins is unbelievable. He's still got the food to smile. He doesn't have anywhere to wipe his hands. Rest areas are homosexuals. Highway rest areas are the bathhouses of the 90s. Bathhouses of the 90s, one of the funniest ideas of any comedy. For many, many, many, many, many gamers.

Is the insinuation when he's like, we'll talk about this more next week? Isn't it that he wants to talk about it? Yeah. We'll delve into that next week. This is his only scene, right? Yeah. It's like uncredited. I think he, like, lived in the area, and they were just like, do you want to do a day?

There's a funny cutaway to him in the montage at the end, too, where he's, like, rubbing Stiller's back from behind. That is also very funny to this joke. Jenkins, like, underrated comedy actor. Speaking of Stepbrothers, right? The therapy appointment with Jenkins, and then the next one is Healy lies to Ted about Mary after he comes back from Miami. She's about a deuce, deuce and a half. Ted, don't you want the name of the housing project?

Just that two minutes is really great. My favorite part of I'd say about a deuce, deuce and a half is when he's like, not bad. Healy ropes Mary in at the golf course. Every part of this is my real passion is my hobby. He says I work with retards. And she goes, isn't that a little politically incorrect? Well, to hell with the hat.

No one's going to tell me who I can and can't work with, right? We got this one kid, Mongo. That scene is out of control. I love those goofy bastards. A leash. Plenty of room to dig. Yeah. That kid is really blossomed.

I don't know how they did that scene. That scene's unbelievable. The crazy dog scene when Puffer passes out. Passes out. He dies. He fucking brings him back to life. That's also got Healy telling them in Paul, the villagers there called me Keen Tintan tea, which means noble man who is loved by many animals, who in kind he loves to.

The Hitchhacker scene, where to stand on that one, C.R. 7 minute abs? 11 out of 10. People don't know about Harlem Williams. Yeah, do you know about Harlan Williams, Craig? Yes, because the movie where he's the astronaut was one of my favorite movies as a kid. I'm blank. What's the name of that movie? Space man? Is it Space Man? It's Space Man. It's a space man. It was really funny.

Step in my office because you're fucking fired. Seven's the key number here. Think about it. It's 7-11. Seven doors. Seven man. That's the number. Seven chipmunks twirling on a branch eating lots of sunflowers on my uncle's ranch. You know that old children's tail from the sea? Rocket Man, by the way. It's like you're dreaming about Gorgon's old of cheese. It's brie time, baby. He comes in hot. DM waiters is going to be impossible The Joe Jackson scene with the flag football

Spikes the ball exceptional by ass He cheats and cheats her And then he goes right And gets his teeth cap Because he overheard her talking about Big White teeth Chris Elliott goes to see Ted Is the next one

You choke the chicken Before any big date, don't you? Tell me you spank the monkey Before any big date You got baby batter on the brain You're going out there with a loaded gun I do love the most honest moments in a man's life is the few minutes after he's blown and slowed.

It's a medical fact says that. We get the hair gel scene. The cut is great to the hair. We get Puffy and Magda going balkers on speed. And then Puffy attacking Ted. I like when he throws the fourth one. He's like, you're going to kill him. Don't throw another one.

He looks at him and just whips another one out. We get the big confrontation with all the stalks, are all together. And then the closing credits are really good at this movie. Yeah. I like how much foresight they put into just filming

on location as they were finishing scenes and then forcing everybody to do Buttercup. All right, CR, what do you got? Most rewatchable scene. Man, I'm so tempted to go to go with Richard Jenkins, but I think the Healy meeting,

Mary, for me, honestly. The golf. Yeah, that's for me as well. Me too. Yeah. It's the funniest stuff. And he's like, how do you know my name?

It's written on your golf bag. Yeah. And she's so likable in it too Where it's like it's actually believable That she might fall for this guy Well it's also like he's trying to do the like the game Like I'm gonna neg you a little bit Yeah

And like kind of act a little aloof to see if that works But just that their chemistry is very palpable And outside of the major set pieces That's my- You know what else is impressive about that whole scene The first driving range shot he takes Off the wall Yeah He goes and it goes off his bag like kind of hard to do

I don't even know how they did that Matt Dillon's dad was a girl golf pro. Yeah. So apparently he was intentionally dead. What do you have? That's my favorite scene. I will say any time Ted and Pat are talking to each other is incredible, but specifically

when he's updating him the deuce deuce and a half scene, there's a moment near the end of it where he gets handed a Budweiser when they're sitting outside. And he goes, excuse me, I ordered a whiskey sour. A waiter walks him and he's like, yeah, whatever. There's also... That killed me this time. When Ted goes to see Pat to tell him, like, actually he does. want to get in touch with her, but Pat's in the middle of quitting.

Yeah. And he's just, that's the whole, like, I'm going to Miami. I got a job with Rice-Roney. Isn't that in San Francisco trees? Like, while they're changing their image. It was like, it was the sumo thing. It's like, she's a mail-order bride. What do you have for most of the way?

It's probably the golf scene or I do think any scene in Mary's apartment is really good. The dog stuff, the first time I saw this movie, the dog stuff slayed me. That's like a 13-year-old. Just the physical comedy of that of like pile driving. Yeah, when he puts the dog in the side headlock and then drops him down, that's pure gut-busting. Great prop. The dog prop is really good. The dog going out the window.

Go away from the light. Yeah, him shocking the dog. Yeah, so as for a butt cake when they ask him if he wants anything. Do you want a Heineken or a Budweiser? What's the most 1998 thing about this movie? I have some runners up being excited about giving somebody at Tony Caneaglera signed baseball

That had a shelf life of about maybe 2003 Brett Fav Cool Brett Fav Brett Fav being a goody two shoes Yeah Cool Brett Fav Any part of Brett Fav Yep got it

Magnus smoking cools A whole carton of cools Are cool still around? I don't even know if they have I think cools are still around I have a winner but what did you have? I had just like watching sports highlights

at the end of the night being something that you build towards in your life. It's like, let's go home and watch game highlights. Picking up Hitchhiker? Sure. That's a good one.

I mean, there's a tremendous amount of gay panic jokes in this movie. Like a hundred of them. Yeah. You would never find that in a 2020 movie. Well, our winner is cops, the TV show, being frontly involved in a scene.

Yeah. That's not the only thing that's happening in that scene. Yeah. Wooge getting his knob polished while watching cops is elite. Completely uncommented on. It's also the last moment the wife is in the movie. Well, the wife are only, she's like the ideal crazy, perfect wife.

But he's still excessive. Yeah. What stage the best? Can I say one more thing? Yeah. The way that bad taste is played for laughs instead of like dramatic thrills is something really interesting to me about this movie. Like bad taste is a skill and you can display it in a clever way.

The Farley's always do that. But like now bad taste to the point about the drama or like Eddington, like those taboos are things now that people play for like, ooh, like is it okay to be talking about this? And there's something about Mary. It's just pure comedy. Yeah, they're just going for it. What stage is the best.

Rest area is being the bathhouses of the 90s. That joke is just as funny as it was in 1998. I don't know how you even come up with that. Also, from what stage to best standpoint, just stopping at a rest area, you got like 10 years out of mileage of... Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah.

Rest area. Go up there. Did musicians popping in, which we did not mention yet, Jonathan Richmond? Yeah. I can't believe this worked, but I really do think it worked. Yeah. I thought it was a really funny distinct part of the movie. It's such an unlikely choice.

Obviously, a New Englander, right? So the Farley's very New England filmmakers. But I can't, for whatever reason, picture. Peter Farrelly rocking out. So this is just like an amazing like Jonathan Richmond. Commitment to a bit. Because if that doesn't work,

you're like, what the fuck? But like that kind of speaks to one of the things I have for what's age of the best is the regional specificity of it. The Rhode Island, Boston. Yeah, he's got a Providence Bruins poster. Yeah, and the Miami stuff

is just like, they find a lot of humor in those places. And I think one thing that's really been lost in more modern movies is like, you know, the drama is set in Boston, but it might as well be set in Copenhagen. Like, it doesn't really feel like Boston. It's a great point.

We've talked about this with other movies. Like, we were just better in the 80s and 90s that going into locations. I feel like they just shoot in a couple of places in the country and then they're like, yeah, this will stand in for this or it'll just be any city. And you can get a lot of jokes. I'm just having Lenny Clark in this movie,

you know, is like a very knowing wink to the New England. And Steve Sweeney. I forget about him. You have any of What Stage the Best? because I had a couple more. I just think most comedies age really badly. And this one, I think, is still really, really funny. It actually makes me laugh out loud.

So I have a few, because this is a big movie for me and my wife. Magda jokes about anyone you know in your life who got way too much sun. Like, oh, veering a little toward the Magda side. Magda's just become a 28-year over-suntan joke. Marky Post. I'm just so glad. She's in this movie. Just an absolute 80s icon

and a legend and was trying to think her her MBA example. Kind of like the Dominique Wilkins of the 80s. Didn't get her just do. Everyone's talking about that. Heather...

Heather Locklear. Some of the other grades. Yeah, I don't know if she was... Everyone loved Marky Post. Yeah. But Dominique... What's on the resume for Marky Post? Nightcourt.

Nightcourt. Right. Nightcourt. Like, that's it though. Some killer posters. Yeah. A couple of good TV movies. She won any dunk contests? Where is she on the all-time scoring list?

She should have been, that's my point. So maybe she's more like a Terrence Stansbury. I don't know. That's nice. Yeah, that's good. Don't get me wrong. I think she's great. She had an unbelievable

Cheers episode when she came in as Diane Chambers' best friend from college and hit on Sam Malone and it might be the single Best Cheers episode and Diane finally flips out because they're flirting with each other

the whole episode. She apparently was like, like pretty scandalized by this movie and was like really nervous to do it but then was very happy she did. Yeah, I'm glad she's in it. She's not to the only people that really, really truly pulled off 80s hair

because she had some real 80s hair. Yeah, for sure. And it worked. Where you have to have basically the same haircut as Patrick Swayze and Youngblood. Yeah. Flogging the Dolphin for a big date. That's aged well.

That's just a running joke now. You flogged dolphin? Did you ever say that to Ben? Yeah, go it out. Pat Hewie Teeth, another running joke. Whoa, some big choppers. They're more common than ever. The lie that becomes a way bigger cover-up lie,

I think is the age the best for me, but we grew up with this with 70s sitcoms. And now I don't feel like we do it anymore. This was like the staple of half of the comedies for 20 years. Yeah. I also, I feel like in my life, after this movie came out, like if a guy ever came home and was just like,

But, you know, she lives with her sister or something like that. People would be like, first, chick in the armor, dead! Right. What about Brett Farvra? When Stouwer says that at the end? The Brett Farver thing, I think, kind of came with him for five, six years, and then people forgot. I like that they have young Cameron Diaz and young Ben Steyer with the wig and braces.

Yeah. And it actually works and they look younger. Sometimes when comedies do this, it looks ridiculous. There's also something very sweet about opening with the wig and bluepilus. that aside from the Franks and Franks and Beans thing and like Ted's you know inciting incident is to have that like idea of him as a character as a kid and be like oh this is like this sweet teenage love story and not just this deranged middle-aged man who's like time for me to stock my high school girlfriend yeah well the key is that he still wants to see her even though

she's he's being told she's a deuce and a half that's right uh Tucker calling sex a good rogering I'd never heard it before since, but it always makes me laugh. British slang. Maybe we'll give you a good rogering. Is there a rogering gag in Austin Powers? I've never heard the phrase rogering. Mary's theory that we need more meat on sticks. Does make you wonder why we don't.

Can we talk about it out? It's just a corn dog. Let's talk it out. I don't think I've ever seen you eat meat on a stick. Well, what's the other one they have, like a long... Well, it's like kebabs, but... We're talking about fried ones. Rearacky beef and appetizers.

Yeah. I always like having the stick. Yeah. What do you think there should be more corn dog style? Like, should there be like a like a steak dog of some kind? No, I mean, I just, it's, I was just more surprised that this is something that's aged the best for a bill because I don't often see him indulging in corn dogs. I think the theory age great for me. Okay.

Because I do like corn dogs. They have one in St. Monica Pier that my wife has stopped. My wife loves hot dogs, as you know. But they have a... As you know. Well, I've discussed before. She's a big hot dog. Hot dog fans.

You must have missed that substack. I know a lot about your wife. Does your daughter eat hot dogs? She loves hot dogs. Because the best part about hot dogs is when you have little kids, you get to relive the hot dog experience through the kids. You get hot dogs back. You get mac and cheese back. That's true.

You're honestly 100% right. You get all this food, you little mini chicken nuggets. Yeah, one day, Craig, things you just stop eating. I will say it is okay for you to have a hot dog now, even though you don't have a child. But what you're saying is true that they're like a weekly occurrence. People don't go out of their way to have hot dogs unless they're at a baseball game. You know what? My wife and I, I think it was like during or right after COVID would have like cookout nights,

but it would just be the two of us. And I would make hot dogs and I'd be like, it just doesn't hit the same when you're not with a bunch of people. If you're like, we're making hot dogs as our dinner, it feels a little beaten down. It's just it goes quick. Yeah. It's not a luxurious meal. When we went to the job. Giants game a couple weeks ago.

I couldn't decide whether I wanted a kibbasa or a hot dog. Got them both. Double-fisted. No kidding. Yeah. Many people have told me that we really fucked up by not getting the crab sandwich. Oh, really? Yeah.

I was so close. I wasn't going to do it. God, that really hurts. The lady next to me was like, you don't want us to break that. Baseball stadium crab? I don't care if we're having it. It's on the bay, though. We're on the bay.

Come on. Yeah, sure. Lots of stuff happens on the bay. Great ballpark, though, right? Awesome. Yeah. My last one says the best is when Pat Healy is pretending he built the soccer stadium and Norm

says, you build the Estadio Olympico and he goes, no, just down the street, the Salento-Colietta Towers. I have one more which was when when he goes to, when Ted goes to see Wogee, Dom at his law office and

Chris Elliott's got the poster up that says bus crash, 12 kids killed. What does that cost us? On the whiteboard. during their meeting like insurance adjusters meeting we didn't talk about Chris Elliott yet

we have a couple spots you want to do it now I just think that like there's there's the Lee Evans like there's the Tucker character and then I found Chris Evans to be fucking hysterical

this time around I don't know if I Chris Elliott sorry Chris Elliott Elliot was hysterical this time around it's funny because I was a

early letterman guy and he was a writer and they started using him on the show. It was the first time. So initially he was the guy the guy underneath the stairs and he would come out. He'd like pop up and it was like this running bit. He would interrupt the show as like this psycho who lived in the stairs. And then he did the fugitive guy.

Yeah. Which was basically every episode would end like the fugitive but it would be three minutes and but then everything peaked when he was Marve Albert. He would come on and do the Albert Achievement Awards in this Marlis. of Albert Wig. And I just would have bought all this. I had all the Chris Litt stock in like 1986. I was like, this guy is going to transform comedy as we know it.

And this, I think, was his biggest movie. And this is after Get a Life and after Cap'n' Boy, right? Yeah. Like, it kind of, it happened and it didn't hit. He had a bad SNL run. He had like a year in SNL. They didn't really work. So this is kind of after all of that.

And he's still, it's such a fearless performance because Wogie is so gross. All the hives and stuff, yeah. He tried to do Marlon Brando was another running character who tried to on Letterman too but he was just kept you on your toes.

Matt Damon and your trip award for most unexpected A list or cameo Brett Farvra. Great Shot Gorder Award. What do you got, CR? You know what?

Do we just go for the ball shot? It was the first one I wrote down. Yeah. I think it's just the most confrontational piece of cinema I've ever seen. Yeah. It's like several moments

in cruising. A torsion test I have a better answer. Okay, better. Yeah. I think how they hide the giant lot of come on Ted's left ear

for 12 seconds until she's like, what's out on your ear and he turns. If you actually watch it, they do a really good job of you only see him from this side.

You never see the left ear. And so they really spring it on you and I think it's impressive. Yeah. A lot of leering shots of Cameron Diaz through binoculars in this movie as well. I don't know if you guys picked up on that. I like when he got the bigger binoculars,

but then sees Magda. It's like, his binoculars weren't good enough. He needs like the, whatever. Chess Rockwell, Brocklander is a word for best character named Magda.

I had Dom Wogee Woganowski. Oh, that's good. All right. Keep Cuddy Prater App and it's where Best Needle drop. You love this soundtrack, don't you? I really like Mary's Prayer by Danny Wilson.

I have, Every Day Should Be a Holiday by Dandy Warholz. Guys, it's build me up Buttercup, please. Buttercup's the answer the ending. Okay. T.R. You have a flex category. Brandy Booth Award for the best performance by a pet goes to Puffy. Absolutely amazing dog performance.

You know, I don't know how often they were using a dog puppet or a dog zombie. You know, like... Zombie. Not zombie. Does it make you want to get a dog this movie? No. Okay. No.

But I like to observe from a distance and it seems fun. And it's just one of the funniest dog characters I can think of. That's the right answer. Dorfler's Door Award for how much did that hurt? The francs getting over, the bean's getting over the Frank and the zipper. Ever had a friend who had some sort of, like, injury down there? Honestly, no. I've been thinking about this recently.

I think it would have been the most important thing that ever happened to any of my friends if that happened. You were saying about how when you have young kids that mac and cheese and hot talks come back into your life. The other thing that comes back in your life when you have little kids is accidental nuts shots, which like I just... Or sometimes they're not accidental. You don't seem that accident. I have a daughter or not a son. So I'm fortunate to not get the purposeful ones. Ben had six months where he was just like,

this is the one area I know I can heard him. This is the funniest thing in the world. I'll just, and they're like the same height. They're like. And that's like, that's the true human, the true male frailty. Yeah. You get you,

you surprisingly get hit in the nuts. Yeah. And you're like, I, perhaps I should just die now. Like there's no recourse from that. So just pump that up. This is just such a great, like, depiction of everybody in the 90s

and the 80s, I'm sure, like, had the story about the kid in the other town over who hadn't pooped all summer. You know, like, it was just like the kid at prom who zipped his balls up and had to be taken away by an ambulance. It's just so, it's so resonant. That's actually with that movie I told you about.

Oops, I poop my pants and killed my daughter's boyfriend. That's what that's about. It's about that kid. I almost said that guy's name on the re-logerable. There was a real guy? It skipped it. Yeah. Well, just say it. No, what's going to happen? Is he alive?

He is. He didn't die from that issue. No, but he had to go to the hospital. He did. Yeah. What did they do? We forgot to talk about how funny it was when they do the one, two, and then it cuts the We got a pleader!

It's a great cut. You don't have a zipper story, do you, Craig? I don't. Fortunately, I don't. If you come up with one later, tell us. So far, so good. I had a, I'm throwing in here, it's a book about medals award for belatedly best quota exchange.

I took a job with Rice-erone. Isn't that the San Francisco treat? It was. It was kills me for some reason. He's like, no, no, it's over. It's not the San Francisco treat. I really enjoy that. And then the Billy Bats, Jack Walts,

the word for most biting and scalable insult. Come on, cough it up chompers. Pat Hilly won't pay his check right away. This one isn't directly to someone's face, but when Pat and Ted are talking and he goes, Who, roller pig? Are you nuts? And Ted says, you said she was a real spark plug. No, I said butt plug.

She's heinous. You can't forget. It's a sumo culture, Ted. They pay by the pound over there. Sort of like, um, duna. My favorite Billy Bats is actually far of being like, I'm in town to play the dolphins, you dumb ass. Butch's girlfriend or would wink like in the film.

I got this one. What do you got? Theatrical cut Sully. the Jeffrey Tambor part. Oh. So, and this is also because after you've watched, like, or as a development, you're like, Jeffrey Tambor's in this movie.

It must be, like, really significant. In the extended cut, he has an entire plot line about him falling off the wagon and being eaten by a python. But in this theatrical cut, you're just like, why is he in this movie? And what was the point of this? Which one did you watch to prepare for this? I watched the theatrical and then went to the,

just the Jeffrey Tambor scenes of the extended cut. It's tough to cut Jeffrey Tambora, but I don't think this movie needed more stuff in it. No, he's very funny when he picks Pat up from the airport as well. What did you have for Weklink? I mean, there's not really like a person that is not good. I have a strong weekling. What do you think of Tucker? I like Lee Evans.

You're about to go in on Lee Evans? I have Tucker. Oh, no. It's a nitpick as well. I just don't understand Tucker's plan. Well, okay, but that's... To me, it's a weekend. Tucker's plan is the weakest.

I have that in the category. So he meets Mary, he falls for her. He pays somebody to break his bat with a baseball bat so then she could treat him as an orthopedic surgeon. Pretends he's an English guy with a cane who's basically crippled now from this injury, but he's also delivering pizza on the side and he thinks this is going to land Mary,

but what happens when he actually lands Mary? He is the worst plan of anyone else. Mary is an orthopedic surgeon. Wouldn't she look at new x-rays of his back and be like your back has been healed? All of it falls apart. I don't understand really any part of it. Yeah.

What he's up to. But it's only one of the things you notice after watching this movie 12 times. Taking it seriously when it's not meant to. Yeah, I just felt like Tucker could have maybe three more hours in the spitball session on Tucker. Maybe Tucker got injured on a motorcycle. Mary treated him and then you'd be, yeah,

there's some better version. I don't disagree. I think he's a little bit turned up. I know the movie's ridiculous, but Sean, what you were saying earlier about how Matt Dillon's character is taking it seriously,

Chris Elliott, I feel like he's taking it seriously. I do feel like Tucker is the only character where I'm like, this actually does break the world a little bit. He is like doing something bigger than the rest of the characters in the movie.

It's a little more slapstick and screwball than anyone else. Yeah. I also had him for the Ruffalo Hannah Rubinick Partridge overacting Award. I was considering for that. He really dials it up one of the times. It's weird what happened with him

because he was the star of Mouse Hunt. Remember the movie Mouse Hunt in 1987? Did you ever see that movie? And then there's something about Mary, and then he's in the ladiesman, he was in the fifth element. He was in a bunch of stuff in the late 90s. He was a big stand-up comic in England.

And then basically never acted in movies again. He's only in a few more movies. The world agreed with you guys. Wait, what was your weakest link? You just didn't really happen. There's not really an actor in this that I think is bad. In fact, I think it's like overstuffed

with way overqualified actors. You guys all like the musical interstitials? I personally do, but I'm used to them, I can see why. It's one of the only signal is also that there's another consciousness, I don't know, I don't say,

consciousness, like, there's another POV on the story of the movie that's, like, kind of like tongue and cheek. You know what I mean? It's in a good way. It's like a fair way, yeah. It's like, yeah. You're just not a Jonathan Richmond guy, apparently.

It's okay. I feel like that's such an easy, like, four minutes that you could take out of the movie, and I don't think. She's always thinking about length. Well, it's not even that. I just like, those are the moments in the movie where I kind of like,

okay, I guess I'll check my phone until they're done singing. You don't find it funny when the sniper... That was funny. Sure, yeah. The gag at the end, maybe it's all worth it for that. But I didn't feel that.

I felt like that was a little bit. The second time in, you're like, okay, I kind of get this. Craig, I forgot to ask you what the Horlebeck scale was for this. It's two-hour movie. 119 minutes, so we're plus 19? I do think you could probably shave five to ten minutes of this movie, and it's a little bit tired.

So what would you take out besides Jonathan Richmond? I think I would, you're probably going to hate this. I would probably, I don't think you need the hitchhiker scene and then I think you could get rid of the musical stuff and it's probably like an hour for you. No, the hitchhiker scene is, how could you not have the hitchhiker scene? This doesn't have anything to do with the movie. It's good.

Listen, he's just whorelbecking it up. Can I give you this on the Jonathan Richmond? Uh-huh. Is that the musician? Yeah. The music stuff? It walks so the Dan band could then run. Fair.

With the hangover. And what was the other movie they were in? They were in a bunch of stuff. They were in two big ones, though. Oh, forgetting Sarah Marshall? No. No. I mean, no.

Wedding Crashers? Wedding Crashers. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay. It's worth it if I get the Dan Band. I think it's a great choice. The Jonathan Richmond stuff.

It feels very 90s. It does. Cutting the hitchhiker and then the subsequent interrogation scene is not negotiable. We do get the kindergarten cop guy. Speaking of which he was my... Ruffalo Hanna Rubak is Richard Tyson, the sweating detective. Just tough.

He's got really good. Tough month on the rewatchables for Richard. What he did? He crushed it in this movie. We're going to take more break and then do What's Age Yours. Hey, y'all. It's Kelly Clarkson with Wayfair. Ever order furniture online and wonder, what if? Like, what if it doesn't hold up? That sofa was four days old.

You should have ordered from Wayfair. With Wayfair, there's no what if. Just style you love and quality you can trust. Visit Wayfair.com. Wayfair, every style, every home. All right. What's age the worst? Brett Farvra?

Yeah. It's a great casting in 1998. Now it's kind of weird to see him Yeah It's tough Tough times for Brett Also What's gonna go on with them?

And then Warren Warren I think Even the Farallies are like Yeah we probably fucked that up We should have cast somebody Who's special needs Yeah

That's not how they thought In the 90s Peter said I wouldn't do that today I would hire an actor With intellectual disabilities They're all over the place At that time they weren't

Didn't get the opportunities They're getting to that I don't have any other what stage of worse? I didn't really have... I mean, once you go in on the premise of this film, it's...

Yeah, it's a comedy. Sean, you have a flex category. Yeah, usually this category is reserved for thrillers and horror films, but when would I have died? It's not the zipper. It's not when my date's father would have come into the room.

It's when the police officer would come through the window. That's when I would have died from zipping my Johnson up in my zipper. police officer would have intimidated you. I think he would have bled to death. Scared stiff. Yeah.

That's what I would have got it. I like it. The CR thinks Luke Wilson could have been Harrison Ford hottest take award. What do you got, Sierra? Is Ted the most deranged of all these guys? Is Ted sitting around? Well, you know, obviously.

I would rank Tucker first. I think Tucker's a fucking maniac. It's not the like, here's the midspeed take. Ted's lies are just kind of harmless. Does Ted have a job? He's a magazine writer. Yeah. Magazine writer.

Yeah. I'm curious what kind of pieces he writes. It's funny when Cameron Diaz. Is like you could just work from anywhere. Yeah. Searing explorations of fascism in the New Yorker. Yeah. He's just like, God, I'm really obsessed with this girl.

So what's the case for Ted being most arranged? Well, I mean, hanging on to that obsession for so long that you're still in therapy about it. You horrified her entire family in the course of 15 minutes. Like, it's not really, I understand why the severity of your injury made you go retreat within yourself, but like you're plenty of opportunities probably to reach out. You stalk her, you use a private investigator to go after her.

That private investigator winds up lying to you about his results, but then you still pursue her all the way down to I-95, nearly get arrested for murder, and yeah, obviously learn some lessons, but I think that there's something about the lengths of what he goes to that suggests he might be

like the craziest one of the three. Solid take. What do you got? Ben Stiller is the greatest cuck actor of all time. Wow. Who is this competition? If you need a cuck. Yeah. If you need a guy.

If you need a bitch boy, right? If you need somebody who is like... He makes the most sense. Not only does he make the most sense, but there actually is like not a second choice. There's not a comic actor who you could be like... I'm going to humiliate you. The whole premise of the movie is this guy is a loser and will lose all the way until the end and then I'll get the girl. But that's the premise of like $9, $100 million Ben Stiller movies.

Really good So mine is also a casting what if The Fairley brothers wanted to cast Drew Bledso As as the Brett Farrf character And he passed because he had just had this Mosh club incident Which was a big deal I was living in Boston time

I forget who was playing but it was It wasn't Everclear was it I think it might have been It might have been ever clear I think it was in Providence. Yeah. Maybe it was in, I don't remember what city was in, but. It was ever clear.

Yeah. The Pats. That's knowledge right there. Him and a couple offensive linemen, and it was just bad, and it became a huge deal. And like, this was, Pete Carroll was the coach. This, the inmates are running the asylum kind of stuff. And right around then he got, and he was like, I better not do it. My hottest take is, I think this is the most underrated thing that ever happened to Patriot fans.

because if he takes this movie and it makes $380 million and he becomes a little bit cooler, that confidence then goes on the field. And I don't know if Tom Brady ever happens. Do you think that this, does he still do the Everclear concert in this version of the best?

He'd already done it. That's why, yeah. So you think he does this movie redeems himself somehow. Redeems himself. He becomes a huge movie star. He goes, Jerry McGuire and this.

He's got his mojo back. Tom Brady's right there. He's like, you know what? I was in there. something about Mary. I made $350 million. I'm not afraid of you. He starts dating Cameron Diaz. Yeah, maybe he doesn't run out of bounds.

He just runs out of bounds instead of taking the hip from Mo Lewis because he's not, like, insecure. He's just out. Yeah, in this version of events, it's like Cameron Diaz dates Drew Bledso and then Neil deGrasse Tyson. And then like, like. And then we don't get six Super Bowls. But have you considered that that level of confidence in Drew Bletzo could have led to Super Bowls? from Drew Bloodsoe. It's very possible.

I'm just saying it's an all-turning universe for the past fans. Would you rather have... You'd rather have Tom knowing what we know now about Tom? I'd rather have the six Super Bowls, and I'm fine with Brett Far of being in this movie. What about six Super Bowels from Drew and then not Tom, you know,

not choosing a rooting interest in the Super Bowl, you know, some of the Deflate Gate stuff. I don't think he could have won the six. Bringing in his health consultant. Alex Squero? Getting cucked by Giselle Bunchen, like all these things that happened. You know?

That video where he kissed his kids on the lips. That was a tough one. Yeah, I kissed this on the lips. On the video. You don't get that. What else happened to Tom Brady? Some other stuff? I'm sorry, I brought this up.

You're maybe not the warmest room to do it in. Casting what ifs. Owen Wilson and John Stewart were the other two candidates for Ted. Bill Murray was considered for Pat Haley, but the fairly thought he was too old. Vince Vaughn, Cuba Gooding Jr., also considered for Pat Haley. I think Vince Vaughn could have done this.

I think he could have, but I think... I'm glad we ended up with Matt Don. There's an element of Vince Vaughn that I think also would have been like a little muggin into the camera. Like...

Yeah. Is he too tall... He was going to be Ted? Yeah. No. Oh for Pat. He could have done Pat. Yeah, I think he could have done Pat.

And then they also offered the Mary part, the Bradfar part to Steve Young. But he turned it down to the film's coarse nature. Because he said the Mormons would all come out and see it and that they would reject him.

Where do you stand on Steve Young? Always admired. that he knew when to hang him up. Yeah. The weirdest what if, that's why this is my last pod. I did not know this one. Chris Farley turned down Warren.

This would have been a real big point. And they couldn't insured him anyway. He did dirty work and then he died as they were making the movies. So, uh, probably a good miss by all parties. But, uh,

I think that that would have been really distracting. I think that ruins the movie I think it would have been seen as more it would have aged worse Yes I think it was Christian

Yeah Yeah Best that guy award Not eligible Lenny Clark and Steve Sweeney Richard Tyson Why are they not eligible Because I'm making them

Not eligible Richard Tyson Is not eligible If we just covered him Two weeks ago He was crisp People know Richard Tyson is now

Okay Right Do I think people know His name is Richard Tyson No they probably don't Fine he's eligible I don't

Did you know who played Magda? Yeah, Lin-Shea. Lynch-Hay. Bob Shea's sister, yeah. We also have Sanford from Sex and the City, a.k.a. Willie Garson.

We're in the long wig with, like, big sits on it. That's who I had. That's a good one. I've got him on the list. I think the winner is W.R.L. Brown is Warren. He's up there. Deadwood fans rejoice.

The master. He was Kenny the cameraman in Scream. He was in Deadwood. He was in the Master, and he apparently had three years in NYPD Blue. Joaquin's the Joaquin and him

getting the fight in the master, right? That's right. Um, real ones would go, I think Rob Moran, who is in Dumb and Dumber, Kingpin, and there's something about Mary. He's the bartender in Dumb and Dumber. Yeah. He's one of the bad guys, Stanley Osmansky in Kingpin. Hmm.

And he's clearly a Farley Brothers extended player. He's in the troop, and he pops up in a bunch of their movies. He's in Chowell Howl and himself and Irene. He's the other cop. He's, he's Tyson's partner. Oh, that's a good, that guy. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Deon Waiters. Our nominees include Avery Brooks, Richard Jenkins, Jeffrey Tambor, Magda, Harlan Williams, Chris Elliott, Brett Favre, Mongo, we don't see Mongo, but I think he's in here anyway.

Sure. And then Jonathan Richmond. What do you got, C.R.? I think it's Jenkins. I don't, did you say Keith David? Oh, I didn't, I don't know why he's... I said Avery Brooks, and I meant Keith Day. I just got Avery Brooks and Keith David confused.

We did a whole podcast segment about this. I was like, who the fuck is Avery Brooks? Yeah. Yeah. Keith David. We did a whole segment before about how those guys, you could have swapped them into

I think there will be a contingent of listeners who think it's Harley Williams. I would go for they're the same people who don't think Richard Tyson is a that guy. Yeah. I think my answer

Harlan Williams is pretty good. You know that old children's tail from the sea? Who'd you pick? Keith David. I think it's Keith David. Okay. I'll now put it.

I just call to me every Brooks. recasting couch director of City Can I test drive Norm MacDonald as Tucker for you guys? Oh, yeah. Doing the British accent? Maybe we get rid of the British accent for Norm, but he's just doing Tucker

pretending he heard his back, but now he's delivering pizzas. What's on Norm as Pat? Norm as Pat could have worked too. I just feel like Norm MacDonald could have been in this movie. Could he have been the Richard Tyson character? Could he have been Woogie? He could have been Woogie.

Like, I just feel like we needed him in this somewhere. busy making dirty work. I get it. I mean, Norm fits in perfectly with this movie. If Norm is Tucker, this movie,

I think is better. Can I make a suggestion in this category? I want to recast the genre because I think you can remake the movie exactly the same but as a lurid thriller.

Oh my God. It would be such a great from hell. From hell movie. Yes, but it's like five stalkers from hell that are all going after.

Yeah, she keeps, like, opening up her heart and getting it like and then finding out the guy is a complete lie. Exactly. I feel like Black Star is Might be making this right now.

It's like Power Season 7. Or MGM. MGM Plus, you mean? MGM Plus. Yeah. I mean, the Chris Elliott turn is legitimately chilling in this movie. Yeah, it's like Pacific Heights. There's two minutes where it's very kind of scary.

Yeah. Well, when he's got like his faces full of boils. He's like twitching. He's got the eye boil. He's got her shoes. Yeah. Yeah, the shoe thing really deflates it. They're very smartly pivoted to having it.

Because you obviously think it's going to be like him doing something physical to her and he's just smelling her shoes. stole all my shoes. Yeah. Craig, you have a flex category. I'm going to wear it, put on my van hat, and I'm going to do a top five list. Top five most shocking and hilarious male nudity in a major comedy. Okay. The zipper scene, and there's something about Mary.

The ball sack on the drum set in Step Brothers? Yeah. Jason Siegel, full nude surprise and forgetting Sir Marshall. Yeah. The Borat naked hotel fight. Yeah. In Ken Jong, naked crowbar scene in The Hangover. So those are all comedies.

Yeah, that's the category. Oh, it's just comedies. Funniest nudity, yeah. Well, shocking and hilarious male nudity in a major comedy is funnier. Well, to live in I in L.A. when Peterson is just like letting it go, I laughed. The other contenders, M.C. Ganey and Sideways. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah.

Yeah, we could see him running. And then the giant devil penis, and this is the end. Is this a Reddit search for you or now? What kind of Google search? I delicately investigated. Yeah. Hey, Claude. Yeah.

You'd be surprised there are Reddit threads about this. This is the first time you talk to Claude. Just like, hey. Was the search been curious about AI?

Comedy's male nude scene penis? I really made the, I made sure that Google knew like humorous male nudity scenes that are jokes.

Funny male nudity scenes. Let's get your search history up on the screen right now. Can we get that? I got nothing to hide. I stand by this top five. It's just

McKay Lemon team. Can I give you the answer? Okay. First of all, great category. It's not on this list. The answer? No, the answer is Borat. That's the fucking funniest.

Hotel beats Borat ever with the fucking Azamat. Like, that's it. That's the peak of everything. Another movie that had the same kind of energy. Yeah, Borat in the theater is the same thing. Halfats internet research. The scene when Ted gets his scrotum stuck in his pants was inspired by a real incident. Farley Brothers, their sister was listening to Records.

and one of the kids went to the bathroom, friends with their sister, and had that happen. Not the same thing, but some of it. When Ted falls off the stretcher, not scripted, they kept it in. It was a mistake. Ben Stiller fell off. The waterfront... You see him grab his arm, kind of, like, realistically.

The waterfront house where Mary lived in Miami was destroyed in 2008 by a construction accident. It's gone. High school scene in the beginning was shot at Plantation City Hall in Florida. They saw a rough cut. They thought it was too raunchy, and they requested. that do not be acknowledged in the credits. When you offend Florida, you've really pulled something off. And then we mentioned the tambour scene.

And then the Diaz worried that the gel scene was going to gross people out. So they shot two versions. There's also like a pretty pointless. But like I guess, you know, it's like if you're curious, there's one of the extended cut scenes is about like Ted's family. And it's like, oh, Ted's brother and like donating kids. knees to the brother. They build it up a little bit more

about what he's been doing between. Apex Mountain, stiller, no. We're not there yet. Okay. I don't have it stiller. Diaz, I think, yes. I think she comes out of this. Is this her biggest movie?

Because it's my best friend's wedding the year before than this. And I feel like she has the juice. Now that leads to Charlie's Angels. She gets 20 million for Charlie's Angels too, I think. Are you sure it's not Charlie's Angels? Might be, but I feel like she was the acre. She kind of takes Julia Roberts's

Ironically, like probably her title here. Right? She could have done whatever she wanted after this movie. Yeah. She's like two rom-coms late when I was looking at the IMDB because she eventually does it in the holiday. Sweetest thing isn't really a rom-com, but you don't think so? Well, it's a comedy.

She just made more sex comedies than rom-coms. She was not really a rock. She's in the holiday, but she was not really a rom-com person. She didn't make it like a while you were sleeping or, but she really took some chances. You know, she made the Malcolm Hitch movie. She did the Gangs of New York.

Matt Dillon, though. What's Matt Dillon's Apex Mountain? I think it's in the 80s. Do you think it's outsiders? I think it. A rumblefish or whatever? He felt like he was the biggest teen actor in the world in the 83, 84 range for a couple years. The Fairley Brothers, yes.

So, this leads to me, myself, and Irene a year later, which is a bonkers movie, a year and a half. I wrote down the Farreley's, and I think it's probably the answer. But, you know, Peter Farreley won Best Picture. Like, whatever, 20 years later. So would you say this was Bobby Farley's Apex Mountain, but Peter Farreley was winning for Green Book?

I think it's theirs just because, as a combo, this is it. I think Peter Farrelly and Bobby Farrelly would probably go out and, like, they could do a screening for this movie tomorrow, and it was. be full and they would be like arts. I don't know that that Green Book has that legacy. You can't have a comedy do better than this, I don't think. Like this movie was an absolute comedy phenomenon that made a ton of money. Yeah.

And created, either created stars or made stars bigger. It's also just so striking because like we just did Ghostbusters and to watch a movie where it's like, Ghostbusters still at the last 20 minutes is like kind of a sci-fi movie. Like a lot of the jokes and Ghostbusters are said to the side of like the plot. This movie is like every scene is a gag. Every scene builds up to a big, big punchline.

The Providence Bruins? No. Chris Elliott. What was the Providence Bruins? The huge poster in the one bedroom scene with Ben Steller. But I'm saying, was there another Apex Mountain for them? No, they won a couple of HL titles. Okay.

Okay. Chris Elliott? Letter. Yeah, I think it's a letter. Apex. It's probably this. I mean, maybe that first episode of Get a Life, where I was like, it's happening.

Like, it's like the premiere episode. It's like it's on Fox. Was it Sunday night? Like, again, like after the Simpsons, right? Like, that was, right? Herman's head hours here. I was more of a Herman's head guy. Would you go funny cum scenes or something else here?

I mean, Buffalo, uh, Miggs is pretty high up there for funny com scenes, but it's unintentional comedy. Uh, this is the most intentional cum scene funny. What are some other come scenes? Craig? Want to Google that for us? Yeah, I'll pull that up. funniest come scenes. Hold on, guys.

Franks and Beans? Apex Mountain for... The terminology? The phrase? Franks and Beans. I think it's the funniest penis injury I've ever seen on... I will say this. Franks and Beans has been a running joke of my house

ever since about actual Franks and Beans and, like, you know, changing... You could go anywhere. Like, I don't know where you're going to take this. Changing our son's diaper. Okay. Okay. Like, make sure you get under the Franks and Beans like that. It's just been...

in the lexcon in the Simmons house. Sorry, Ben. Miami comedies, I'm gonna say yes. Yeah, okay. Miami Vice is hilarious to me. Miami Movies gets a little more interesting. I think it's Miami Vice.

I think so as well. Are you excited? It's Scarface. For Miami Vice 85? I'm not ready to talk about it. Okay. Did you want to do like a separate little segment at the end of this?

Did you hear Sean's idea? Flipping them? flipping them. Oh, making Oh, making B'BJ is Crockett. MBJ is Crockett in Austin Butler's tubs.

That got me excited. Right? Isn't that the move? That is the move. I don't think Austin Butler can be Sennie Crackett. But MBJ can be Sunkard. Have we ever seen him smoke a cigarette?

I feel like he smoked cigarettes and caught stealing, right? He does. Is that not what they're doing? It's not MBJ as Sunny? I don't know. I feel like it would have to be. That would be weird

for Michael B. Jordan to be like, I'm happy to be sure. play second fiddle to Austin Butler. I just wanted an Oscar. Jamie did it. Yeah. And he was bigger at the time

and had come up was coming off an Oscar win. Crazy Sun Tans. It's actually the same thing was coming off the Ray win. Crazy Brown Sun Tans. I think yes. Jonathan Richmond definitely us.

Cruz or Hanks? I cruise. Cruz as Ted or somebody else? I would like to see Cruz with the chompers as Healy. See, I think Actually, 80s Hank's could do

Pat Healy. Yeah. Oh, interesting. I had Hanks either as Ted or Pat Healy. Hanks could have done either part. Cruz could have done the hitchhiker.

Seven-minute abs. I think Hanks is the answer. Scorsesier or Spielberg? Tough one for these guys. I think it's Marty and it's Cape Fear. It's basically, it's just a thriller. That's good. The Catherine Tremel,

would you throw your life away for this obvious stayaway award? Is that for Mary? Who's the stayaway? I think it's Mary just because she has all these psychos after her. Oh, once you find out her dating history and it's like you've dated NFL quarterback and three guys who've broken. Yeah. She's a maniac at a tractor.

You're looking over your shoulder the entire time. You'd get murdered by some stalker. I would still throw it away. Picky Nits. Why does Mary's an orthopedic surgeon but lives in this weird complex where she shares a balcony with Magda? What's going on here? I feel like this is like basically. right out of like 90 sitcoms

where it's like yeah they all live together and it's like why would they all would you live with Magda? Wouldn't she be in like a on the 34th floor of some high rise Is it supposed to be that she's next door neighbor and is like kind of shares a balcony

with her or does she live with Magda? She explains it right Magda's husband dies and was lonely and Cameron Diaz is like the most altruistic human that's ever lived right so it's doing her a favor by keeping her company and then Magda starts nailing the homeless

dock worker Speaking of Mary, does she have patience? Is she working? What's going on here? She seems to like... She sees Tucker in her office. Yeah, but that's the... Otherwise, it's like during the day she's like driving around...

No surgeries? Play golf and buy like checkers for... She's working at the camp. Yeah. She's checking out her golfs. You wanted more scenes of her examining patients. Well, that might explain why she's living in a small apartment. Not getting a lot of business.

Yeah. Would it like to have seen her at least like move somebody's knee around and been like, how's your ACL feel? better? Is that what happens? Yeah. Okay. Does that feel better?

Wouldn't Ted have known that he went to the same high school as Wiggy? Wiggy went to one. They went to Borington Falls or whatever. They talked about it. But she knew Mary's, okay, same town at least. Yeah. Neighboring town. He says four towns over it.

We heard about it four towns over. But he knows who Wugie is. Yeah. He knows this guy's name is Don Wuganowski. Never put the two and two together. I guess Ted's not a rocket scientist. Yeah, he's just a magazine writer. I have one more big one, but do you have any?

I don't really know what Dom's plan here was. Dom gets the ball rolling downhill. Yeah, why is he helping Ted but trying to sabotage him? He's a maniac. But he wants Healy to find Mary and then he's going to go. But like when he's home watching cops, was he like, I might go down there anyway? Or is he only go down there once Ted gets arrested? Well, he's relieved earlier in the film when he hears that Mary is overweight.

And he's only interested really in coming down when he finds out it's a ruse, right? Yeah. So then when he learns that Mary still looks good. Yeah, yeah. How would Ted ever get a hold of Brett Farb the week of the Dolphins game? That's an incredible question.

Brett Farv's like 30 million people are watching NFL games. I don't know. Back in 98, did those guys have to go through massive film sessions? Wasn't it just kind of go out there and throw some frozen ropes? Out of all 30 starting quarterbacks in NFL,

who's the one you think you get closest to getting in touch with right now. Oh, this is a fucking awesome question. Not Jalen Hertz, I'll tell you that much. That's for darn sure. I would have said Donald. He's barely awake. Donald?

Before the Super Bowl. Why not? Because he seems like a regular guy? He seems like the kind of guy would be like, I also like prestige television and I was going to watch. And maybe DM once. What do you think? I think the answer is Drake May because you go through his wife.

I mean, wouldn't I just go through you? No, if you go through Drake May, he's a wife, and she's on social media all the time. and you just be like, I want to hang out with your husband. I'm Chris Ryan of the Watch. You see that? Is that how you introduce yourself to new people? Chris Ryan of the Watch?

No. No, who's like the least successful active quarterback? I bet Bryce Young. Bryce Young, number one overall pick. Oh, this is stupid. Baker. Baker would definitely have the answer. Baker.

Isn't the answer Tyler Shuck? It's like 25 happy to be here. No, but Baker actually would do this. And Baker would be like, yeah, man, I'll come hang out on like a Thursday. Yeah. I feel like Baker does like three pods a week. Any other pickin' hits? To me the biggest one is like I get Pat's move here.

Okay, let me go back. Is Pat's move to have sex with Mary or is it to be in love forever with me? I think he loves him. He wants to marry, Mary. Yeah, he loves it. Okay, so that plan is going to fall apart at a certain point, right? And he's probably got to uncap his teeth. Right.

And then you already pointed out Tucker Norm's long game is just baffling. Yes. But speaks to Mary's flawed orthopedic surgery career. Sequel prequel prestige to be all black cast are untouchable. I think it's untouchable. Is this movie better with... You sure you don't want to do all black cast? I think it's an untouchable.

Is this movie better with Wayne Jenkins, Fergie the Floris, Zainlo, Robert Evans, Ryan Rucco, or somebody else? I definitely think that there was some space here for Fergie because of the New England thing. And it's just like Fergie being like, You're going to do this for me. You're going to go down to Miami and find this Mary.

Or I'm going to clip you. Fergie playing head? Yeah. Fergie is, I don't think I can handle Furgy is Wogi. Fergie the florist watching cops is not okay. You don't want to do Robert Evans exploring Mary? When did Robert Evans come back?

Evans is back. I don't know if you want to do it. Robert Evans or Robert Logia? Robert Evans. Was Robert Evans ever in the mix here? I don't know. I just thought we'd throw away. Mary had the kind of legs that could stop a room.

She had Nellie Court his golf swing. She loved meat on a stick. And she could hit a three iron, one hundred and ninety yards. Where did Robert? I introduced it to Steve McQueen and I never saw you do them again. I introduced her to Brett Favb. She was living in Green Bay this time next year.

Brett Fob never won another game that year. Just want to ask her who gets it. You'd go Dylan? Yeah. I'm going to prop master. Oh, I'll go to the script. We got Puffy. We got lobe come, you know?

Yeah. Probably in answerable questions. what replaced rest areas as the bathhouses of the 90s for the next three decades? That's a great question, Bill. What were the zero zeros? I don't know how to answer that. I'm not sure I know.

Yeah, I don't really know either. My question was... I think Tinder hopped in there. Yeah, I think online like swipe left, swipe right. Or, yeah, one of those swipe, yeah. That's two best tens. What's the podcast equivalent of emptying the baby batter before the date? It's like, is that like when I do the watch before the rewatchfuls?

Before we recorded, Bill was like, you guys fresh? You done any pods today? Don't want to be all used up. Trying to squeeze a second one out. Well, I had Zach last night. We recorded most of the podcast, but then we did the top late night. And he's like groggy and half asleep. Yeah.

That's the best version of Zach. I think you guys were talking about I-O, and he's just like, I don't know what the fuck you do there. I love groggy, Zach. Um, did Ted and Mary get married? Uh, I think they date for like six weeks and breakup. Yeah, because he's, he can't carry this. What do you mean? No, she's, she's like marrying Ronnie Seidling.

I also think she, he gets newked by, we didn't talk about this by Sarah Silverman and Candy, Alexander. I don't think he lasts five seconds with them. Oh, true. We forgot to mention them. They had two very stereotypical, uh, 90s rom-com comedy, girls hanging out scenes. Yeah. This is my big one. How did this movie not have a sequel?

I assume they had a chance to do it. This is just good thinking. This is like, let's not fuck with this. Like, a sequel, a bad sequel to this movie screws up the integrity of this movie. All right. You're saying that rationally. Like, I'm surprised, too.

Like, somebody that is treating the movie industry, like something that's not going to bastardize good IP the moment they feel like they sniff some dollar signs. It's crazy to me. Ben Stowe is a much bigger star. Cameron Diaz is a much bigger star for this movie. The Farley Brothers probably needed some sort of comeback thingy in around 2005-6 range.

And they never thought about doing a sequel? It's crazy. They did a sequel to Dumb and Dumber. They did the Three Stooges movie. They remade the Heartbreak Kids. So it's not like they were above this kind of thing. It just didn't do it. It's the all-time layup.

I can't believe they didn't do it. It could happen still now. To the idea. So they basically, this movie comes out in 98. They essentially need to make this movie before 08 to get it under the social media wire. Because after that,

it's just like, yeah, I know what Mary's doing. I watch, I look at her on Facebook. Right. And so, like,

there's only like a small window to kind of pull off that premise. Cameron Diaz is only 53. I mean, you could easily, we're getting a spaceball sequel. Well, we're getting the Meet the Fockers

grandkids movie, right? Yeah. Oh, that's yeah, that's right. Meet. Fawker-in-law. Falker-in-law. The Secret Handshake memorabilia you'd want from this movie. I have a great one for this, but you go.

Mary's signature golf bag. Oh. Warren's earmuffs? That's really good. The headphones, right? So, he wears the red earmuffs, yeah. This is what Peter said about the hair gel. Somebody hired a guy to make different loads.

He showed up with a leather briefcase like a businessman that had 30 or 40 loads in it. We called Ben over and would hold one up at a time like an earring. people would say no too small kind of lumpy that's how we decided afterwards we never saw the crew member again he shed his briefcase and left we were laughing like who is that guy

and how does he have that job I'd want the briefcase the briefcase full of loads you want the loads in the briefcase I want the whole package I want everything they probably like calcified what's some everyday use for the loads for you

what do you people come over like hey do you like Something about Mary? Have you seen my load case? Floyd Gondale, butter, my ass, lollipops of my mouth award for something I just enjoy. A load case.

I like a movie where everybody has a job, but nobody works. So, like, Cameron Diaz is an orthopedic surgeon, but spends the day hanging out at the driving range. Ben Stiller apparently has just umpteenth amounts of of PTO to, like, stalk his ex-girlfriend. Yeah.

I don't want to spend a lot of time working with these guys. I love when a movie introduces a character who seems completely ancillary and incidental and turns out to be the psychopath at the center of the movie. Yeah. The Wookie Reveal is good. In theaters. Pretty good. This is pretty great.

Double feature? I would go Kingpin just to get the Farley Brothers Uber. I said American Pie. It was just held us down two summers, two jolies in a row. What do you have? Dumb and Dumber. Okay. What's your laugh?

three and a half hours. Who won the movie? I know it's the Farley Brothers, but it's Dylan. Interesting. For this viewing? So there's four candidates for this. And I actually think the answer is Ben Stiller.

Because he goes from, I didn't know you could be the lead of a comedy to then ripping off 11 straight years of comedies, and it's because of this movie. And I don't know if it happens without this movie. Are you the deciding vote, or do you have a third option? I think it's Cameron Diaz.

There you go. I think there's a, really good case for both of them. I think Matt Dillon's the funniest part of the movie. I think Ben Stiller goes on to the greatest amount of success in the movie. But it's Cameron Diaz on the poster. It's Cameron Diaz's movie. Her character's name and the title,

this is the thing that catapults her. I thought about her, but I feel like she's going to win the next 15 years anyway. I'll tell you what else I was thinking about. I don't know if Ben Stiller wins the next 15 years. She never been nominated for an Oscar, you know, not really remembered. Has she ever done any Oscar beat? gangs of New York and being John Malcovic. She was nominated for a Globe for being John Malkovich.

And she's been nominated for awards before, but never kind of got to that mountain top. The Interferring thing felt like that was bad for a little bit. Yeah, that was a shot. What was the Aaron of Ferris thing? In Lawson Translation. Oh, yeah. She got a Glob Numb for something by Mary.

For this, yes. And now it's time we go to Craig for his take on the movie. You'd see this movie before. We didn't decide who won the movie. I think in the moment in the moment it's Cameron Diaz but I think if you watch the movie now it's Matt Dillon

because going back you're just so surprised at how funny he is and I can't believe that he didn't go on to do more comedy well this is a little apex mountaine because it's like

who won the movie is different than who won the movie right right like there's the best part of the movie and the person who benefited most from being in the movie which I think if you're doing that

I think it's Ben Stiller it's stiller but when you walked out of the movie in 1998, probably Diaz. Yeah. Being like, wow. Who was that? Yeah. Well, also the Farley Brothers, I would have been like, give me season tickets now. I'm with you guys. Where do you stand on the like the run after this? Me, myself and Irene, shallow howl, hall pass, all those movies. I didn't like Shallow. I did not like, what was the other one?

Me, myself and Irene was carried his peak. Like, that was worth saying on theater. Shallow Allen stuck on you I wanted to like stuck on you It just didn't work Yeah It's not great It just didn't happen And then fever pitches

In the front I still like fever pitch You do Yeah It's fine I like it too Craig what was your take I love this movie

The script is just really impressive Like the amount of callbacks That they're able to weave back into the story Like there is no stone left unturned It's really impressive Like every little mention Her having an ex-boyfriend Everything ties up

In a really Yeah in a really really impressive way. It's just a great set piece comedy. And I think the, I think there was a sweet spot for set piece comedies and I think CGI kind of ruined them where I think when you have to live in like the reality of what you're literally physically able to do while shooting a movie, I think set pieces were just way funnier because it was like real humans doing real stuff.

And this is like a perfect sweet spot with that. And then once you get got past certain like 2010s, there was like way more CGI and things. And the humor to me felt more. like artificial. Yeah, when Warren beats up Ted, it's real. It would be so fake now. Yes.

Yeah. And I think there's like... It looks like he took those bumps. But they would do it the way they do like those fake, like those John Wick movies, like Bob Odenkirk action movies where it's like, oh, I'm like flying through the window. Because they always think bigger is better.

And with CGI, you can go huge, but I actually think it takes away some of the humanity of it. And so this movie is within like a 10, 15 year sweet spot of all the set piece comedies. In my opinion. I forgot to mention I like when they try on the outfits

and Warren's dressed as like a cowboy and then Ben Stowe comes out with a pink superhero outfit. Also, a driving range on the water is like the coolest thing I've ever seen in my life.

How many of those are there? It's probably bad for the body of water. Why isn't there one of those in L.A.? I bet there is somewhere in the valleys. So then is the idea that you've got a underwater ball scooper? I guess. It would only improve the water in the way.

Or there's a guy in a boat out there, just like there is, you know? CR. Phil? It was a pleasure. It was a pleasure, yeah. I'm sorry you didn't like my idea of having the suitcase of all the stunt cum loads. I just wanted to know what you were going to do with it.

Like, I think it would be if you did a series of... You look at it if I had it in the house. I would check it out. I would be like, how can we ruin Ben's night with this? I love that they had made 30 of them. I was just so fascinated by this. It would be good, like, Halloween handing those out. Yeah.

Do you think the guy who made the loads has, like, had a good job? Do you think he is... I think he said he was in props, but now. I think probably about 2007 probably moved back to wherever he came from. It was like I'm moving back to New Jersey. Yeah. Like into his mom's house?

Yeah, I just don't think it really probably worked out for. Because his career as load gas thing. Because like Craig's point, CGI came in. Yeah. You might say he was load bearing. Sean, new newsletter. Yeah, hey. Hey.

Hey, projections. Yeah, that's it. They do like a paragraph, but there's something about Mary. Oh, that would be nice. I would love to promote this fine podcast. Do that little letterbox? Anything you can do to help us out. That would be great.

You got to pump those numbers out. Thanks for your help. Thanks to Craig Roebuck as well. Thanks to Gahal and Eduardo as well. Thanks to Louis K for hanging out. It would be for the first time in two years. I was big of him. Yeah, that was nice to him.

And we'll see you. We're doing all comedies this month. So we'll see you. Not sure what the comedy is going to be next week, but we'll see you next week.