The Rich Roll Podcast - Eduardo Garcia Is The Bionic Chef: Regret Nothing, Forgive Everything

Episode Date: July 9, 2018

Imagine yourself alone in the Montana backcountry. You're doing what you love — camping, hiking and simply enjoying the wilderness — when you stumble upon a rusted old relic. An old oil drum perhaps. Curious, you approach and peer inside to discover the remnants of a long-dead black bear cub. You set down your backpack and reach inside to further investigate. What happened next would forever alter the life of this week’s guest – a flash of electricity so intense it should have instantly killed this young man of 30. 2400 volts that seared his insides, utterly destroyed his left arm, left his body with 9 severe exit wounds and delivered him to the ICU little more than a dead man with a heartbeat. Eduardo Garcia would spend 48 days in intensive care. He would undergo 21 surgeries that would claim four ribs, a ton of muscle mass, and even his left arm. On top of everything else, he would be diagnosed with testicular cancer. But against all odds, Eduardo survived. A chef by trade, Eduardo began his career at 15 before attending culinary school. He spent the next decade traveling the world cooking for various high-end people on various high-end yachts. In 2011, he decided to return home to Montana to start Montana Mex, a food company that today produces a line of fine organic & non-GMO sauces and seasonings. But the tragic accident that would soon befall Eduardo would ultimately set his life on a new and unforeseen trajectory beyond his wildest imagination. Dubbed the Bionic Chef, I first came across Eduardo's story by way of Charged*, a feature-length documentary that elegantly chronicles the spirit of what this man lost but more importantly, what he found. It's a survival story built on the foundations of love and forgiveness. It's about building stronger relationships and a better life after tragedy. And it's about finding your best self so you can live life fully charged. Today I have the great privilege of sharing Eduardo's incredible story. It's an inspirational tale of facing and overcoming extraordinary adversity. And it's about the power of attitude to persevere. But more than anything, it's about one man's journey to wholeness — and ultimately, redemption. For the visually inclined, you can watch our entire conversation on YouTube here: bit.ly/richandeduardo I sincerely hope you enjoy the conversation as much as I enjoyed having it. Peace + Plants, Rich

Everything that comes across our doorstep, anything that comes through our wheelhouse on any given day, can be used to impact your life to any end. So it can be negative, it can be positive, you get to choose, you get to work with it, and it's what we do with it. And staying true to your convictions, true to your beliefs. I will share my experience for as long as I'm on this earth, as I believe it brings value to others and elevates my own healing and continued education and being. That's Eduardo Garcia, and this is The Rich Roll Podcast. The Rich Roll Podcast. Just for a moment, I want you to imagine yourself out alone in the wilderness, specifically the Montana backcountry. You're camping,

you're hiking, you're doing this thing that you love, this thing you've been doing your whole life, when suddenly you stumble across a rusted old relic. You're not quite sure what it is. Perhaps it's an old oil drum. You approach, you peer inside, and you discover the remnants of a long-dead black bear cub. You set down your backpack, you take out your knife, and you reach for the paw to further investigate. What happened next would forever alter the life of this week's guest. A flash of electricity that, by all accounts, should have killed this young man of 30. 2,400 volts that seared his insides, destroyed his left arm, left his body with nine severe exit wounds, and delivered him to the ICU little more than a dead man with a heartbeat. After 48 days, 21 surgeries, including the removal of four ribs, a ton of muscle mass, and your left arm, plus on top of everything, a testicular cancer diagnosis, somehow this guy survives.

honor of sharing the incredible story of Eduardo Garcia, a truly inspirational saga of unbelievable adversity, extraordinary perseverance, and ultimately redemption. There's so much more I want to share about Eduardo and this conversation before we dive in, but first... We're brought to you today by recovery.com. I've been in recovery for a long time. It's not hyperbolic to say that I owe everything good in my life to sobriety. And it all began with treatment and experience that I had that quite literally saved my life. And in the many years since, I've in turn helped many suffering addicts and their loved ones find treatment. And with that, I know all too well just how confusing and how overwhelming and how challenging it can be to

find the right place and the right level of care, especially because unfortunately, not all treatment resources adhere to ethical practices. It's a real problem. A problem I'm now happy and proud to share has been solved by the people at recovery.com who created an online support portal designed to guide, to support, and empower you to find the ideal level of care tailored to your personal needs. They've partnered with the best global behavioral health providers Thank you. by insurance coverage, location, treatment type, you name it. Plus, you can read reviews from former patients to help you decide. Whether you're a busy exec, a parent of a struggling teen, or battling addiction yourself, I feel you.

I empathize with you. I really do. And they have treatment options for you. Life in recovery is wonderful, and recovery.com is your partner in starting that journey. When you or a loved one need help, go to recovery.com and take the first step towards recovery. To find the best treatment option for you or a loved one, again, go to recovery.com. We're brought to you today by recovery.com. I've been in recovery for a long time.

It's not hyperbolic to say that I owe everything good in my life to sobriety. And it all began with treatment and experience that I had that quite literally saved my life. And in the many years since, I've in turn helped many suffering addicts and their loved ones find treatment. years since, I've in turn helped many suffering addicts and their loved ones find treatment. And with that, I know all too well just how confusing and how overwhelming and how challenging it can be to find the right place and the right level of care, especially because unfortunately, not all treatment resources adhere to ethical practices. It's a real problem. A problem I'm now happy and proud to share has been solved by the people at recovery.com who created an online support portal designed to guide, to support, and empower you to find the ideal level of care tailored to your personal needs.

They've partnered with the best global behavioral health providers to cover the full spectrum of behavioral health disorders, including substance use disorders, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, gambling addictions, and more. Navigating their site is simple. Search by insurance coverage, location, treatment type, you name it. Plus, you can read reviews from former patients to help you decide. Whether you're a busy exec, a parent of a struggling teen, or battling addiction yourself, I feel you. I empathize with you. I really do.

And they have treatment options for you. Life in recovery is wonderful, and recovery.com is your partner in starting that journey. When you or a loved one need help, go to recovery.com and take the first step towards recovery. To find the best treatment option for you or a loved one, again, go to recovery.com. Okay. So I just got back from 10 days in Dublin and London to arrive home to 115 degrees Fahrenheit of heat.

It's so hot in Los Angeles right now. I'm sitting in my container studio and I have to turn the air conditioner off in order to record these things. And it went from semi-tolerable to sweat just pouring down my face as we speak. But hey, it's home and I love it. I just want to thank everybody who came out to see me and the Happy Pair guys at Smock Alley in Dublin last week. It was a really great event. It was so nice to meet so many of you. Then I went on to London, which was amazing.

I did a bunch of podcasts out there that I'm excited to share with you guys soon. And in retrospect, I really wish that I had scheduled a public event there as well. I met so many cool people on the street who stopped me to say hello and tell me how much they enjoy the show. And I really appreciate that. And I just thought, why didn't I do an event here? So next time for sure. Okay. Eduardo Garcia. This is quite the story, you guys. So who is this guy? Well, Eduardo is a chef by trade. He began his career at 15 before attending culinary school and then spent the next decade traveling the world as a chef on various yachts before returning to his home in Montana to start his very own food company called Montana Next.

The tragedy that is the sort of focus and subject of today's conversation and his life, quite frankly, happened in 2011. and subject of today's conversation and his life, quite frankly, happened in 2011. But rather than let it bury him, Eduardo's story is really one of strength. It's one of adaptation, forward propulsion, forward movement, and ultimately service. He's dubbed the bionic chef for good reason. And I first came across his story in this incredible documentary about his life entitled Charged, which you guys should all please go check out. It's available on iTunes, Amazon, and Vimeo. I'll put a link up to that in the show notes. And finally, this episode is also viewable on YouTube. And I highly suggest you check that out. You can find it at

youtube.com forward slash richroll. It's worth a watch. If you are enjoying the videos there, please hit that subscribe button. I've already said too much. So I'm going to let Eduardo tell you the rest. Eduardo, man, so nice to meet you. Thanks for coming out to Calabasas. Great to meet you. We were talking before the podcast.

I've been wanting to meet you for a long time, man. So it is a pleasure to have you in the studio. It's my pleasure. Likewise, honored to be here and really looking forward to it. Cool. So you were actually born in Calabasas. Yeah. Do you remember or were you really young when you moved to Montana?

I mean, that's what they tell me, right? Yeah. How many of our memories are formed by our true memory or by our sort of created memory through repetition and storytelling and whatnot. But what I can tell you is I remember frying eggs on the sidewalk when it was like 100 plus. And I did not do that in Montana. It's not happening there. No. I remember.

I mean, there's photos that prove it. Oshkosh, Bogosh, overall, somewhere on an ocean. Yeah, we was, let's see, in this area until 86. To 86. So, and your mom was like super into like a spiritual community, right? That was like, and that's what moved to Montana, but that started here. Yeah, so there was a spiritual community

called Church Universal and Triumphant that was founded in Pasadena and had their campus or their community headquarters in Pasadena. And in the mid to early 80s, bought property in Montana. And yeah, everybody made the mass movement, like everything in the vehicles drove north to largely this ranch property that was right on the northern border of Yellowstone National Park.

Wow. Is she still part of that community? Very much so. And you grew up in it? I grew up in it. Yeah. And what was the kind of theological community? Very much so. And you grew up in it? I grew up in it, yeah. And what was the kind of theological bent? It was like an all-purpose seasonings for spirituality.

I have to speak in chef metaphors, right? But like if you took, this is how I described it, because how many times in my life have I had friends coming from the conventional or Catholic or Christian or, you know, route and being like, so Ed, what kind of crazy like commune or compound or cult? Like, you know, and so, I mean, when I was a kid, I defended it. I was like, you know, hey, F you, man. You know, like, you don't say that. You don't talk about me and my family like that. And then at some point, I started to question like, well, what is this anyway? And so what I could say to summarize is that I believe the Church Universal and Triumphant to be a compilation of the world's religions. So grew up knowing who Mother Mary was and who

Jesus was, and also reading the Ramayana books while we ate chicken soup. You know what I mean? Like on a Saturday night. And my mom being of Jewish descent, so studying the Kabbalah. And, you know, you factor in all world religions. All that, the Bhagavad Gita, the Quran. Absolutely. So, jambalaya, spiritual jambalaya.

Yeah, listening to bhajans. All my buddies were like listening to Bon Jovi. I was like, what? Yeah, listening to Bajans when my buddies were like, listening to Bon Jovi. I was like, what? We were the kids bringing like tempeh, you know, burgers to public school lunch. Right, super hippie.

Everyone, yeah, and everyone's like trading their lunches out and nobody wants to fucking trade my tempeh burger for their Capri Sun and you know, whatever. Did you, have you watched Wild Wild Country wild country yet i haven't been told i need to yeah i mean it's impossible to have this conversation without me thinking about that you know obviously you know what you're talking about is different but the idea of like a spiritual community kind of moving west and creating like they create it's crazy you got to watch it yeah i mean it's super compelling but anyway anyway, man, that's wild.

So now you're here and let's get into the meat of this because look at your arm, I wanna hear the story. Do you get tired of telling it? There was a period, so there was a period right after my injury where, it's not that you tire of it, it's you question why you're doing it just like you question why are you telling the story yeah you know it's very rare i find myself

tired of doing something you know i think that's like an easy out and so what is what is your why behind that like if you had to answer why you tell the story yeah so at some point um you know where i tired telling retelling the story was um is this still serving everyone, including me? Like there's a certain amount of our time here that I think we give to others, but we have to always give to ourselves. I mean, like I just saying this makes me grin while I'm talking to you because I'm just on the ride up here. I'm thinking, all right. I'm going to talk to my fiance today. while I'm talking to you,

because I'm just on the ride up here. I'm thinking, all right. I'm going to talk to my fiance today. I was like, honey, we need to focus on the shit that makes us happy, that brings out our best bits. Just say no to that gig. And I'm going to say no to this gig, whatever, you know? And so for telling this story, I will share my experience for as long as I'm on this earth,

as I believe it brings value to others and elevates my own healing and continued education and being, you know, Right, I think that what I like about that answer is the kind of commitment to continually healing and growing because I think it would be easy to just kind of stay in one place, like I'm the guy with this and this is how I define myself.

And it becomes an all-consuming identity for yourself rather than a part of your story that has value for others and informs kind of how you make decisions and live your life going forward, but isn't the end of the story. That's right. Right? That's right. but isn't the end of the story. That's right. Right. That's right. And I feel like we're getting,

we may be getting ahead of ourselves with some listeners, but the easy one here that's hit to that point is like at the end of the day, it has to check out with me, like whatever the action is, whatever the story I'm telling, if I'm going to go on Good Morning America to talk about how my hand blew off, whatever action is, whatever the story I'm telling, if I'm going to go on Good Morning America to talk about how my hand blew off, whatever it is, it has to gel.

It has to make sense to Eduardo. Otherwise, and that's what I found at some point, I was like, I'm not doing any more interviews where I don't have a certain degree of control in the finished product because it's not what I want to be a part of. Another article going out talking about how I did X, Y, and Z, which may or may not be true. I want to be a part of it. If I'm going to be interviewed, I want to be working with you

to create the best piece of content, not working to just feel like some hype and a page. We're going to get into the story, but I feel like it's still a good time to ask you, like, you know, what is it that, that you want people to take away from your story? Like, what is it that you want them to walk away with that they can use to impact their own lives that everything that comes across our doorstep, anything that comes through our wheelhouse on any given day can be used to impact your life to any end. So it can be negative. It could be positive.

You get to choose. You get to work with it. And that is my takeaway. It's not about being called the bionic chef and being an amputee and all these things. It's that happened, but that's no different than someone else's this or that happening it's what we do with it it's it's and and and staying true to your convictions true to your beliefs from that you know yeah it's about your relationship to to obstacles um and rather and failure and whatever gets thrown in your path and rather than just looking at it

from the perspective of anything from victimhood to annoyance, to understand like these are opportunities for your personal evolution and growth, which is easier said than done. Oh, totally, man. Are you kidding me? Yeah.

I mean, that's why I'm here today, you know, is for me, this is an opportunity to have sort of a no bullshit. I mean, that's how I want this to be, a no bullshit sort of conversation that reminds me of where I've been, who I am, what I'm doing, and where I'm going. And sometimes it's, I mean, I have been there where I look, I'll catch myself in a moment where i need to audit like immediately like quick and i'm like wait a minute i'm still working on this two-year-old vision this or this one-year-old vision of who i am or who i'm supposed to be and it's like no no no no so i mean that's the takeaway if i was to wrap it up for everybody is wake up every morning empowered by where you've been and encouraged with the curiosity and the

wanderlust and the possibility of where you're about to go in that day short term can be so impactful and super super powerful and so just focus on that you know do not be dragged down by however many years you've had behind you it's so hard you know we get in our grill like, I love what I do, but even reflecting back on how I've lived my life the last three or four days, like I've just been in a work groove. You know, I feel like, you know,

it's so easy to just like carve that line and you stay in it and it becomes rote, it becomes routine, it becomes easier to repeat, and it becomes, there's more and more resistance, it becomes more and more difficult to just stop and like be present and connect with gratitude and awe and wonder and all these childlike qualities

that when I think of your story and in watching the movie and all of that, like that seems to be, that's really like, you know, the beauty in what you have to share thank you so i don't know man help me out yeah i appreciate that i've been working like around the clock the last couple days and it's like and that and then watching your movie and i'm like man you know i need to i need to hit pause in my own life you know

I need to hit pause in my own life. We all, yeah. I think there's no negative there, man. No negative. Yeah. So let's walk backwards and talk a little bit about where you came from. Yeah. Short, long, as it relates to this.

Yeah. So you grew up in Montana. I mean, you're outdoorsman from to this. Just, yeah. I mean, so you grew up in Montana. I mean, you're outdoorsman from the get-go. Yeah. A little bit of a hyperactive kid. Yeah. Some scruffs in school. Yeah.

I mean, beyond that, I don't know if that's... Moving to Montana at the age of six in 1987 was like a dream come true for a kid that didn't know he was dreaming about it, right? Like it just, like, where am I, you know? There's wild animals and there's Mother Nature. Just whether I knew it or not, between the ages of zero and six is my beacon, is my muse. And so showing up in Montana is like walking into the hallowed halls of whatever your passion is gonna be. And so, I think I say in the movie,

moving to Montana was like stepping into a National Geographic magazine for real, like in real life. So for me, that was my focus was the outdoors i was a boy scout you know um i was as you know as you say i had my mom says i had a lot of energy and for me i think there's a curiosity that was just untethered and that comes out in disruption and rebellion and you know and then of course, got to own it. You know, at some point you just start making shitty decisions. You're a teenager growing up with a lot of single parent homes

in our community. A lot of dads were not in the picture. And so it was not just me. You had a motley crew of guys and gals who, we had good parents, you know, they were feeding us well. We had all the things we may or may not have needed, but we were well taken care of, but they were hustling. They were working. They, a lot of them weren't present. And so we were self-educating and that leads to, you know, chemicals, drugs, you know, rebellion,

making poor decisions, getting in trouble with the law, whatever it may be. How much of that do you think is, is a function of you just being a kid who like wanted to be, you know, roaming around outdoors and you're forced to record, is I loved, loved education, school. You know, I mean, right now I'm 36 years old and I'm thinking about what is my next continuing education? You know, to sit and be educated is stimulating and exciting. To sit and be told to sit, to raise your hand. And maybe I didn't know how to say it at 12, but I, you know, hey, got a question.

Hey, and I was the kid with the hand up. But what I was trying to say is like, I'm not learning what you're saying. And I'm not dumb, but I'm just not getting this. Well, you're somebody who learns experientially, right? Absolutely. Or, you know, that just sitting, I wasn't getting to me through the one question I was allowed every 10 minutes or else I was being disruptive, right? And so then that, what do you do? You know, you you get cornered by I'm not learning this and I should be so now I know I'm behind the eight ball mm-hmm now I'm also being labeled disruptive and all I'm trying to

do is learn and you gotta do one or two things you you either someone hand like throws a hand out lifeline you didn't happen or you just give the middle finger and you're like, all right, well, screw it. I don't need any of this. And how much of it do you think was because your dad was gone? Like your dad left when you were super young, right? Yeah. Yeah, dad left while we were actually still here in L.A. I think I was about two months old. And, you know, in so many ways, I'm glad he did.

You know, how I understand it is my mom, you know in so many ways i uh i'm glad he did you know um what i how i understand is my mom you know my dad has a had a problem with alcoholism and my mom was like i don't want my kids growing up with and maybe let's just say alcoholism is the banner that we'll put up but there's all the things that fall under that under the disease which is alcoholism and so all of those other attributes or attributes that she chose to not have her kids influenced by and then I thank her for it you know it meant she had to work harder it meant she had to do three jobs it means she had to sell her jewelry and clothes to put us into school but she was able to raise us with morals and values and in this way yeah that was free of the disease of alcoholism. You know, we grew up in a home that was free of, free of that and many other

poor parental traits that a lot of kids grew up with. So I'm grateful for that. And he comes back into your life later though. Yeah. And that's the thing. So yeah. And you and you know yes i didn't have a dad growing up and i'm certain that that impacted me negatively or that impacted me in a way that was not really beneficial considering 12 year old kid just doesn't know what to do with the fact that they don't have a dad around you know um but dad did come back in the picture when I was 14 in 93. And I'm grateful. My little sister is a byproduct of that sort of remarriage.

And I think that was the second time married. And dad, we figured out how to be friends. Right. One of the things that I loved about the movie was that as much as it is a story about like what happened to you and the sort of recovery and the rebuilding of your life and the, you know, sort of struggles that are packed into that, it's really a movie about your relationship with your dad or reconnecting with your dad and also with Jen, you know, who's really kind of, you know, a protagonist in the movie, but the evolution of, of kind of how you find a way with your father was like a really beautiful, like thematic three lines throughout the whole thing. And I feel like the movie is, is, is much about that as it is

about anything else. Yeah, it, it is. Um, the director, uh, the director of the film is Philip Baraboo, and the film we're talking about is Charged. And I chose to not produce the film. I chose to not be a part of it. Jen and I both were highly encouraged to not produce this film, and so we didn't. And what's beautiful is that a team of creative storytellers took all of this footage, like 386 hours of footage, and edited it and built a human piece, compelling and worth sharing, at the tune of 86 minutes, edited and cut. And, you know, at some point they had to make a decision. Do we cut out? Like, all of a sudden it whittled down where when it was a two and a half hour film it was too long and it had this super beautiful long storyline of eduardo and his dad in that story but then

the directors ended up cutting that out because i mean the film isn't about eduardo's dad it's about this guy's journey through all of these things which include the dad right but um you know my journey with my father um i believe i the time i did get with him on this earth um taught me everything i needed to know about how to not make the same mistakes he did and i apply those you know i mean i got 36 years but you know i got 20 i'll take him yeah and you're you're the legacy of his experience i mean you know he has this love of the outdoors and the water and you know the fishing and he was a chef as well and those are all things that define you. You know something?

I'm Manuel Alfredo Garcia's kid. I grew up without him in my life, and I'm in love, drop dead infatuated with Mother Nature and the outdoors. And when I do finally meet my dad when I'm 12 or 13, and then over the next 20 years of having a relationship together, 12 or 13 and then over the next 20 years of having a relationship together um we almost get to connect as two devotees to the same practice we both love nature yeah and he's been doing it 40 years long but we both get to connect on it you know i i can't sit in the lineup without pelican flies over i like talk to it on my dad's back oh Oh yeah. Like I can't, you know. So where does,

where does cooking come in? You know, cooking, cooking found me at an early age. It was not, you know, me on the buckboard counter with grandma on the apron, stirring the pot, you know, like that was not part of it. You know, my mom, like I said, did a lot of great things for us. Cooking was not one of her skill sets even though she's she's great in the kitchen she was busy hustling you know so we would have like 10 p.m. chicken soup and we'd have that for like you know five days or something so cooking for me was hanging with the homeboys in the summer 14 years old and 13 years old 12 years old and no one no

one available to come so what, what do you do? You just open the fridge. You start making it happen. You burn some things. You botch some things. Most people just eat Fritos, though, or eat like peanut butter sandwiches. Yeah, I know, man. But we had like five-pound tubs of miso paste in the fridge and like, you know what I mean? We didn't even have ketchup. Intended for like the communal dinner at the commune. We had Bragg's amino acid and like bags of Saitama. Oh, you did? Oh my God.

You know what I mean? So like, and so whatever, but we ate those things. But, you know, so cooking for me professionally was being 15 and just needing a job. You know, like I kind of say I got tired of stealing quarters from my mom's purse that she didn't have. Yeah. You know, and got a job at a local place,

flipping burgers, throwing pizzas. Yeah, like line cook. Yep, totally. And I mean, it was fun. I mean, there's a tourism industry in Montana, so you're 15 and with your buddy, you're 15, Yeah, like line cook. It was an easy transition into saying, all right, well, I don't think I have it in me to do four years of committed college type of post-grad work. I couldn't see myself sitting for four years. But I knew food is something I could keep doing.

And so culinary school was an easy, all right, well, let's get educated. Let's go get a degree in this. Let's make this legit. Was your thinking like, oh, I'm going to be like a fancy type chef or just wanted to learn how to cook better? Or like, what was the, did you have an ambition or like an idea of where you wanted to take that? I didn't. Not at the first. No, not even.

And it's interesting. No, not even. And it's interesting. How many times in my life have I tried to sell myself on this false sense of self and knowing right in the very first notion this I don't think I'm going to be the chef that has 10 restaurants all over the world. But not knowing what was in front of me was my motive, was my impetus, was, well, I don't know what it's going to be, but I'm just going to focus on doing food and doing it as well as I can. Yeah, like an adventure. A hundred percent. Just the way you'd head out on an expedition. A hundred. I mean, so then where did my career take me? You know, I was either going to work three jobs and pay off student loans and, you know, knock, knock, knock. I got a phone call from a yacht that was in Seattle saying, hey, we need a chef overnight.

Are you interested? And I was graduating culinary school. I was looking for work and, you know, I guess humorously I ended up, I turned that job down at that point. I did only five months later to have the same captain call me one final time. And then I did take that job.

So the adventure began, you know, I had no idea what I was gonna do with this degree in cooking, but at that point, like, I mean, I had no idea what I was going to do with this degree in cooking. But at that point, like, I mean, I'd been cooking in restaurants for six years. I knew the rhythm, I knew the drill, I knew I was gifted enough to do well in the industry in regards to palate and flavors and all of that. And I think I fell into a dream job on so many different levels. And I think I fell into a dream job on so many different levels. And, you know, it took me a while to realize the passion for food.

But then the ability to travel the world and, you know, learn about cuisine and all these crazy places. Right. I think I read, like, you'd take your skateboard and every port of call you'd cruise around, go to the bakeries and various restaurants. And every port of call, you'd cruise around, go to the bakeries and various restaurants. Oh, it was. So, again, I always say, like, you know, during my 20s, it was an opportunity to explore. But I traded the mountains and the rivers and sort of the grizzly bears and all that stuff in Montana in for, you know, the map of the world. And, you know, instead of riding a horse or hiking, I was skating or surfing or wakeboarding or diving. I mean, I went to the water and I did that jam for 10 years as a yacht chef. And we didn't cover the whole globe, but we did a lot of

it. Right. Yeah. So, yeah. So, two and a half years on Dorothea, right? And then like 10 years total? Yeah. Two and a half years on the yacht Dorothea, which, I mean, that was Captain Mark Drulow, who lives down in Encinitas and just south of us here. And talk about an influential friend, mentor, person. You know, he was the type of guy who had adventured in his life and wanted to continue adventuring,

ergo by opening the door for others to do the same. So, you know, the option was to sit on the dock in Point Loma for, you know, two weeks or explore Baja for nine days. And once we got on the dock, hustle to get it clean and ready for the owners or something. And like hand would go up, be like, adventure. Yeah. Like, you kidding me i mean it's not i mean it sounds amazing you know what do you what do you take from that experience like what was the biggest like lesson that you learned from just yeah literally a decade of constant travel yeah it's uh it was in the middle of the atlantic ocean my first, I did four different crossings of the Atlantic Ocean on different vessels.

But on a sailboat, we started in Mallorca, Spain, in the Mediterranean, and we crossed to Antigua. And it took us about 30-some days, and we stopped along the way. And at some point from halfway, I guess, between the Canary Islands and Antigua, you know, you're in the middle of the ocean. You're about as in the middle as you can be. And I don't actually, I don't believe in my memory that it was a stormy day or, you know, I'm not going to paint that picture. I think it was just a day at sea and there was motion of the ocean, we were cruising along. And yet there had been rough weather on either end of it and probably rough to come.

And I remember sitting out and looking at the horizon line and just kind of having it hit me that there's no control. Like the whole notion of control is kind of out the door. You're sitting, you're surrounded in a floating body of water. You cannot breathe or eat it, drink it, anything. And you are on this man-made vessel that is your lifeline. But ultimately your peace and your salvation and all of it just starts within yourself. And like that's, the control is like a misnomer for presence and like presence, like being within yourself, being seated.

It's beautiful. Yeah, I mean, it's a humility, right? Yeah. Almost like it's preconditioning you. It's like pushups for what you're gonna have to face later. Right? Yeah, I love that. You know, like that experience probably,

I would imagine came into play in helping you weather what you had to get through. Must've, oh, must've. I mean, on a prior crossing, really, really rough weather, bigger boat, really rough weather. Everyone still has to eat. I still had to get food done and there was a german engineer cook with the boat like oh it's no it's nuts man it's nuts you know i mean

you're you're assing against the wall and you're you know you're kind of like just trying to find stability and um but anyway the german engineer in the middle of a very gnarly storm he brings in a little speaker set up with his i mean this is before iphones this was with his ipod or whatever it was mp3 player and he puts on hardcore like trance electronica music not my usual johnny cash genre you know and um and i roll with it and i realize that he brings the storm into the kitchen right so he like brought all of this energy and this music and this um impact into the kitchen instead of it just being this chaos around me he's like you got to dance with this bro i brought it into the kitchen and all of a sudden as you're cruising and grooving

with it you realize like you forget that the boat's getting tossed around you know you elevate your movement right to match to meet it yeah to like meet that vibration so rather than fight it or resist it like hey let's not even like not only accept it but like i'm gonna take you one step further right you meet it meet it up yeah yeah yeah you know um my fiance's uncle was a very well renowned rock climber, Todd Skinner. And one of his quotes I love is, "'We cannot lower the mountain, "'therefore we must elevate ourself.'" That's the jam.

Yeah, that's like a Zen koan. So good. Yeah, cool. All right, so you get back. You're cooking. You're doing your thing, man. And so, you know, lead me up to the life-defining expedition. Yeah, so, you know, yachting was a 10-, 11-year career. I realize I don't want to sleep in a bed that's two feet wide by a foot and a half

tall for the rest of my life. Um, are there people that do it like their whole lives? I guess this guy in Encinitas, right? Yeah, no. I mean, Mark, uh, Mark did it for ages. I have friends who are chefs that started the same day I started in, uh, the yachting industry that are still doing it. And, you know, like for me, I mean, I, so on the way up here, I listened to the podcast you just put out with you and Julie.

Right. And one of the things she's, she mentioned is only committing to do and be the thing that is love, like that brings you and creates love. Like, you know, and at some point I realized like, look, we can force ourselves to do all kinds of things. And yet that's not your true self. And for me, you know, for me, it's whatever gets you screaming and jumping to get out of bed in the morning. That's what you need to be doing more of.

And at some point I realized that chefing on the boat, I was kind of sleepwalking. I was, I knew how to do it. I could crush a meal for however many people over however many days in any country. But I was really looking forward to my off time when I was building a food brand and writing a TV show and focusing on my home back in Montana. And at some point I was like, you know what? I can no longer continue to work without the passion. I need to chase the passion, which is no longer being a yacht chef, but starting these other businesses and moving home.

Yeah. And that was 2010 and yeah, 2011 March was making that jump off the boat. Right. And so let's talk about the accident. So this was, when are we talking now? So this is 2000. 2011, left 10, 11 year career in the yachting industry

in March, was signed with William Morris Endeavor, pitching a TV show, had incorporated a food brand that was supposed to be like this farmer's market, fresh salsas and guacamole brand. Montana Max, or was this something before that? Montana Max. Yeah, Montana Max. Yeah, I got your stuff right here, dude.

Yeah, so before- You sent it to me, thanks for sending it. No drama, no prejudice. I haven't tried it yet, but I'm looking forward to it. So prior to these products that are sitting with us, Montana Max was a food, like a farmer's market, fresh food brand. Like perishables. Yeah, yeah.

And so that's what we were gunning towards during the summer of 2011. And my business partner and ex-girlfriend, Jennifer Jane, by my side through all of this and the creation of the companies with our other partners, my sister and brother. of the companies with our other partners, my sister and brother. And yeah, what's interesting is we could get into, we could spend two hours just talking about the day of my injury, but really what was happening in that point in time was I was transitioning from being a yacht-based person and having a career in the yachting industry to being a business owner. Right. Entrepreneur. Being a host of a TV show. Media personality. How do you go from like yacht chef

to like getting an agent at William Morris? Yeah. Yeah, one of the guests was Ari Emanuel's elementary school bro. Oh, really? Uh-huh. I know Ari. Yeah, and we sent our sizzle reel to Ari Emanuel

and he immediately sent it on the same day in the same hour to both offices in North America. So New York and LA office, and they FaceTimed or Skype videoed each other. And we're like, WTF, what is this thing? Like, why, what was it about the sizzle reel? Like, it's like, okay, you're a chef. Like what's the spin? Like what made it unique? We filmed the sizzle reel ourselves uh with it well we know we hired a production team and we directed the the shoot and it's the concept if show was called active ingredient and my and the premise was that i believe and i still do that we all we are the active ingredient in our recipe in our life rich roll you are your own

active ingredient and through all of the other ingredients which could be our partners our friends our lovers our kids that we are the necessary component to activate all of those into gelling into like yeah yeah like this is this is the thing we're sharing this is the prana this is the food right yeah but that's this sounds like a motivational inspirational well you're like where's the cooking part no totally but so the cooking the cooking was um was the based on my lifestyle which is if you and i are going to go surf or hike or head out into the woods recreating or be out in the field even vacationing in another country i

want to cook a meal and i want the day out to incorporate to bring in elements that we incorporate into the dinner so active ingredient was saying like hey we all can find our truest best selves this show is about me doing it and i hope it serves as a metaphor for you in whatever your active ingredient moment is for For me, it's about food. It's about cooking. And it's about making, it's about bringing others who are sharing the meal with me and the locale, whether it's in the ingredients or the weather, bring that into the meal. Yeah, to make it experiential. A hundred percent.

Yeah, that's cool. Dude, I'm ready. I want to watch that. I want to see that show. What happened? I know, right? We are, we're pitching it right now. Oh good well we put i mean i mean it's tragic right so we we had a we had a meeting with uh the buyer at the food network set for october the 15th and

i was flown to the icu in salt lake city on october the 9th so four days before that meeting which you know like contracts had kind of been drawn up and just, we needed to seal the deal. Right. So bittersweet, but- But you're resurfacing it again now? We have not let go of that concept and repackaged it called The Hungry Life.

And we're pitching it right now. So fingers crossed. That's cool, man. You should have a TV show. Thanks. I mean, I think you're the perfect person to do it. And especially as an ode in the legacy of Anthony Bourdain, with somebody with your level of life experience and world, like with the travel that you've done,

but also what you have gone through to get to this place. Like you're sitting in a place where it's not just about the cooking and the food. It's like you have all of this wealth of, um, information and insight that you could bring to an audience that makes it much more dynamic. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah. I appreciate that. I have not let go of that. We'll see what happens, you know? Did you ever, did you ever meet Anthony B bourdain did you know him at all no i knew him how most of the world knew him through his books and through through his his voice and uh influenced me greatly yeah influenced me greatly right once a lot of people oh yeah it's tough man oh yeah um all right so so you're this is what's

you have all this momentum happening in your life. Yeah. And walk me through the day. Yeah, so I was out elk hunting. There's a part of me as a chef that loves to know where my food comes from, whether it's the carrots in my garden or whether it's, you know, an animal-based protein. Like, I want to know more of the story about it and I want to be involved in that. So, hunting has always been a part of my life. And it's interesting,

you know, as a hunter, I often, prior to a harvest, take a moment to connect with the animal in life. And just, you know, I don't need to make this sound all woo-woo, but in the hunt. And you're talking to a vegan, so. Yeah, well, you know, I don't know who's listening and I just want to. A lot of vegans listening. Yeah. A lot of other people too. So, I do this when I, you know, like I'm putting

a garden in, um, on Saturday. So when I get home tomorrow, I'm going to be in the garden all day. So even when I'm pulling a plant up, is it thinking about it? Like, is this strawberry ready? Has it done its thing? Is this, have I over harvested this asparagus patch or whatever it is? So anyway, the morning I'm out hunting, I pass on an animal. I decide not to harvest that animal for my reasons. And I end up resetting. What was it about? Like something just didn't feel right to you? You know, I, I had, um, I had kind of told myself, I want to harvest this. I want to harvest a, a younger, um, a younger cow elk or you know a younger female elk not what i saw in front of me that day which was this huge beautiful male elk which 99 hunters around the world would be like why in the heck didn't you you know wasn't what i wanted and i think

intention right reason right motive right cause like intention is huge you know like that wasn't what I wanted. And I think intention, right reason, right motive, right cause, like intention is huge. You know, like that wasn't my intention for that day. So although I could have been seduced by how big and beautiful this thing looked, no. So I decided to keep going hiking later on in the afternoon. And I come across a, I'm just to put this in perspective for everyone, I'm in a valley at about 5,000 feet and I'm heading from the sage sort of valley floor winding my way three miles up into the conifer or evergreen forest and within those that forest there's we're still you know everything is sloped you know gentle rolling up and I'm in a little drainage small small, small drainage. And I see a can, like literally a 50 gallon oil drum cut in half on the ground. And curious, I walk up to it.

And when I- Which is a weird thing to see. Which is a weird thing to see, except in the Rocky Mountain West. And even in many parts of California here, there is a lot of detritus. There's a lot of leftover mining camp sheep camp uh homestead junk out in the woods from our predecessors you know from the folks that were

here before us and i just assumed like that's an old campsite camp something you know and i look inside and there's what literally just envision a black toupee everybody with like a claw or two and some bone you know the size of like a volleyball like deflated that's what i see in the bottom of this can and i'm like what the heck is that you know and growing up you know a student of the outdoors i mean i've picked up every feather i've checked out every animal dropping like you know i study it all and so huh, that's interesting. And part of me thinks, well, it looks like a very, like two to three year old dead, like been here for three years, dead baby bear cub or something. And so I pull a knife off my right hip and I put it in my left

hand. And my plan is just to take a claw off off just like you would harvest, you know, a interesting branch or something that's, you know, fallen and I'm going to take the claw and, you know, put it in a curiosity case or make it a necklace or give it to my friend who works at the Boy Scouts and is always collecting to teach with, you know? And I mean, I don't even get within 15 inches of the base of this can before 2,400 volts of electricity arcs into the tip of the knife I'm holding and into my body. You didn't even touch it. It just jumped at the metal. It arced into it.

I'd arced it. And it's interesting. I had both hands going down into this barrel. I'm on my knees, leaning's interesting i had both hands going down into this barrel i'm on my knees leaning over i have both hands and you know because like the knife is going to pop the cloth and the right hand is going to pick it up and teamwork and um what's interesting is had i not been holding that knife like nothing would have happened but that knife curated uh the conduit for that electricity wow so had you just had you touched it with your hand though, it would have conducted the electricity, wouldn't it?

Or was it, it was, you had to have metal in here. Yeah, I think it was the metal. And so what was going on was there was a, there was an exposed power cord beneath the tank. It was a buried line that was going to a back country cabin. And this can was sitting on sort of a point where the line had like, it was a ground junction access point. And the lid had many, you know. And so what I come to understand, you know, and what I can share is that, you know, this junction box had been compromised by weather and neglect and time and was not maintained.

And the lid became unsecure and fell off it should have never been exposed i mean it should have been labeled and fenced and the whole thing so um you know in that moment i knew none of this so right now of course i mean how would you think like better not touch that like there's there might be an exposed wire underneath i mean you would never occur to you it's it's you you know the the only thought would be should i touch that it looks gross like that's the thought you know um so how many volts 2400 2400 volts yeah and does it just hurl you like what how what so i wait so i wake up right so i wake up on on my back staring i wake up staring at the clouds and treetops and i you know i i at this point all i know is that i'm staring at the clouds

did you know that you were electrocuted and like what did it feel like no in that no in that moment in the moment i got electrocuted it was like someone had inserted me into inside the speaker cable of like a yes concert or something it was just straight up electronic symphony in the back of my head with heat with like the gentle warm flood of heat lights out my eyes open up I don't know how many minutes later and i i see clouds and dappled blue sky and tree tops and uh and i think to myself get up get up what are you doing and i roll over and i'm on my knees and my hands hands and knees and i say get to your feet and so this is all i remember is just talking to myself to get stand up.

And I must've stood up and I'm next to this barrel, all my gear, my backpack, my bow, my things. And the next memory I have is just me is the next member I have is of the sound of gravel. And I'm, I'm on a dirt road and i'm i'm on a dirt road i'm no longer in the trees i'm no longer next to that can i don't have any of my things with me except in my right hand i'm holding a can of bear spray and my left hand i look down at it and it is blackened and burnt and wow seized into like a claw shape you know right? Right. And what's the pain? Like you're feeling anything or are you just in this weird adrenaline?

Yeah, no, dream mode, total dream mode. Total dream mode. I mean, I gathered where I was. Okay, I'm in this part. I'm in this valley. I'm walking downhill. Why am I walking downhill? Why is my hand black? And then of course, this, I'm walking downhill. Why am I walking downhill? Why is my hand black?

And then of course, like, oh yeah, I saw, like I saw that dead baby bear. I went to get a claw, I put a knife and then it's like, oh man, that noise, that heat. Did I get a, I must've got zapped. I mean, we've all been zapped through static electricity or the random one time where you get a little too close to something and it like zaps you back.

And I think, again, life experience, those small little tidbits of being in touch with electricity in my life definitely all of a sudden come full center i'm like wow i think you actually just received i think you just got electrocuted like bad and now i take account now now my head's on a swivel and i look and i look at the hand and it's grotesquely disfigured and black and gripped into a claw. I look at my leg on my left thigh and I see that my pants are black and I kind of poke a finger through there

and I can see it's just charred flesh and I don't have to look anymore. Now I realize that I am walking down this road to get help and this was a subconscious decision I made when I was not in my body. Yeah, like your unconscious mind just went into survival mode 100 without any memory of that 100 no one i don't i don't think we remember the day that the day the moment we're born and take our first breath outside of our umbilical

cord you know but it happens and how do we know to do that that's the miracle genetically wired to do it yeah so do you have like a sat phone or a cell phone? I would assume there's no service or anything like that. Like you're way out back country, right? The cell phone, the keys to the truck, the water, the first aid kit. It's all back at the- It's all on the ground.

And how far are you from like civilization or help? I'm about three miles. I mean, I've gone back to the site many times. I've retraced all these things. I mean, I'm about three miles from where I received help. And what's just interesting is that I'm carrying my bear spray. Somehow in that collected moment of getting to my feet and leaving the site, I make a decision to not carry anything

but bear spray like just think about that for a second it's like wow it's like anyone ever packed for that trip where you're running out of time and you need to get out the door by this time or you will not make your flight or something and you just have to decide what to take and what not to take it's like triage it's like i just got there. Well, it's all the more remarkable. I mean, when you see the movie and you see, we're going to talk about this in a minute, but like when, when you see the condition that you're in, it's not just your arm, like it's your head. It's your, like the fact that you could do anything is shocking. Like the fact that you walked three miles when you see what your body looked like, it's just unbelievable that you didn't just die on the spot. Yeah. It's the flip side of

watching the Olympics. You know, those folks are training and putting everything they have for decades into being their most maximized self. And I think dying and surviving an experience like that is the flip side is you are using everything in your tank, every facet of every ounce of energy you have to towards salvation. Like no doubt, no doubt. It's the flip side, but it's also similar. You're tapping into every reservoir that you have to accomplish your goal. And that goal may be a gold medal on a podium or maybe just living. Yeah. Right. No. And it's, I mean, okay. So here's, here's, here's the million dollar question, Rich is like, how do we access that type of clarity, that type of conviction and that type of follow through and execution?

Like tell me on the daily, bro. Like how do we do that? I would like to know the answer to that. Are you here to like reveal this secret to me? Well, I'm hoping that Charge, the film, somehow inspires all of us to at least be aware of it and recognize that deep within all of us, there is a almighty power, like deep inside. And yet, it's time, you know, that we cover ourselves up in all the layers that, you know, are shed immediately when it's time to fight or flight.

Like, it's immediate. But when it's kind of everyday life, we are held back by all the stuff, man. Yeah, we become myopic i mean you know my story is about change forged through pain a different kind and certainly not as severe and i think um that that you know like i said earlier like these these obstacles that are placed in our path are teachable moments to help us get closer to who we really are. And I think that's a big part of your story in a very extreme way. But why is it that, you know, I can't change until I'm in pain or that pain is required or obstacles are required or hardship is required or overcoming these things is required in order

to get in touch with the fact that it is about the moment, that it is about gratitude and love and appreciation and service and sharing and all of these things that are innately part of who we are and available to us as a choice on a daily basis to use as guiding principles in our life and in our behavior and yet are so much more difficult to access when we're just when things are okay yeah you know it's it's true it's true and that's i mean you can fast forward or however we want to do this but i mean that that was part of that was most of my reasoning to be available and agree to have a documentary made about this tragedy in my life was just that sort of the to be a part of creating something that serves as a reminder to others and

myself included that this is just part of the this is part of the jam this is life man this is how this is what it looks like this is what it feels feels like. And actually what's for charge for the documentary, I mean, we as collectively as a group, we're in a very unique position that we were filming this TV show. Right. capture footage from years prior leading up until the day of the injury and day four of being in ICU and you know cameras on the production company we're working with citizen pictures out of Denver you know they show up not to document but they showed up to be like holy yeah are you okay and to you know respectfully and lovingly show up. But of course, they, you know, we talked to them and Jenny arranged and they brought a camera, they brought

a light. And then a friend drove down with our camera. And, you know, Jenny Jane rolled, rolled that camera through and captured still photos and video that I think all the way through the 50 days of ICU and then in the next couple years she continued to document and then even a friend of ours uh Phil Baraboo who ended up being the director on the film not knowing why we're capturing this except maybe Jen Jen Jen I think knew there could be something to salvage from all this and i think phil at being i mean as a documentary filmmaker he's had you know he probably saw that coming yeah and for me i was just i remember naively saying well we're capturing this because you know my hope is it never happens again and i don't want to have to remember it through experience like i want to i'd like to be able to for posterity for yourself only yeah you know like i don't need i don't want to have to get

zapped again to remember this and so that but that serves us like we circle back to like why this film what do others get from it and well we're creatures of story i mean that is that's part of who we are and there's nothing that that can move the human soul more than an incredible story well told, right? That's how like you as an experiential learner, I think us as creatures, we can read textbooks, but when we hear, when somebody shares their experience and they do it in a compelling way and it's an extraordinary story,

I think it has the ability to connect with us as animals in a certain way that other information cannot. And, you know, your story is a perfect example of that. And it's so, I mean, that's the thing when you're watching the movie, you're like, oh, my God. Like, there's just, like, I think there were a couple places where it looked like, okay, are they, like, they had to recreate you going, you know, touching the knife and all of that. But, like, post-accident, like, they're right right there. Like it felt like day one through the entire process. And I want to work my way up to that because that footage in the hospital is, is excruciating to watch when you see the physical condition that you are actually in. I mean, in a, in a very graphic

way, I've never seen anything like that. You know, I think you're, obviously when people meet you, they see your arm and your hand immediately. And it's like, okay, he lost his arm, his forearm and his hand, but your torso, I mean, it's, it is just charred to nothing. Like half of your upper body is essentially gone. And it looked almost like the ribs were just black. It looked, there was like just a hole into your organs right there. I mean, it was unbelievable. And there you are, and you're like,

you got a smile on your face and you're like cracking jokes. I'm like, how is this guy even conscious right now? Rich, I was on so many drugs, man, it's easy. Yeah, I wrote down like ask him what he must have been you know um like you we're gonna administer ketamine mr garcia well what's that you probably hear have known it as special k hey what are you trying to imply you know like um god they say that in icu they have a really big issue with folks who have severe recreational, you know, chemical dependency, recreational. Tolerance is so high.

Their tolerance is so high, they can't medicate it. You know, but I, you know, look, I think obviously my care team did a phenomenal job keeping me at a threshold that was tolerable. did a phenomenal job keeping me at a threshold that was tolerable. I don't know why I have a hard time talking about this or wrapping my head around the whole concept that we all have different tolerances for pain. And maybe I have an issue with if I say, like, hey, Rich, I have a really high tolerance for pain. I think I've heard that, and it's hit me this like ego laced, like macho type of thing. But in reality, I think I have a higher tolerance for pain than a lot of folks.

And I also, I've experienced a lot of pain and I've been in ICU a lot. Maybe not from my own experience, few times from my experience, but I've had a lot of- A few. Yeah, you know, with my dad, when he had heart surgery in 2005, like that one time when I did this, when I broke my wrist three times, like I've been in and out of those scenarios a lot.

And then I got to say, like, look, I know this sounds strange, but I don't fear death, you know? like I, I, I understand the process here. I get it. Is that a result of that experience or did you have that before this occurred? I think it's compounded through this experience, but it's been around and it, I think a lot of it has to do with killing a deer for the first time when I was 11 years old and watching life disappear and and and then working in a garden a lot of my life like I still I mean I'm this is all like I stopped pulling live flowers off of stuff because I was like oh man I won't see it die I'm gonna find you know like I've been I've just been so closely connected with life and death through my lifestyle for so

long that look I'm not saying it changed the game but i think it wasn't new the scenario wasn't new right so my approach was all right this is a job this is what's happening and i have a role to play here and so i did that yeah part of that that humility cycle of life being in nature understanding it's not personal. Yeah. Right? Yeah. And look, I have never actually offered that as a conversation point when asked, like, how was your experience in ICU?

I just hit on that right now here with you because of how we're talking and, you know, the way it came to me. you because of how we're talking and, you know, the way it came to me. But I do want to say that I think one of the greatest prescriptions that, you know, I didn't have given to me was ignorance, is I just didn't know how close I was to death. I, like so many times, Eduardo, you know, shows up to the scene or shows up to the moment of, and through the whole way I am, I just didn't know. I didn't know. And therefore, if you don't know, you're about to die. You're not going to take it as seriously as- I think that comes across in the movie. I mean, I got that because I'm watching you and I'm like, this guy doesn't realize the severity of the situation that he's in. I mean, half his skull is missing.

Yeah. You know, and you can like literally see inside his torso, you know, and your thigh. I mean, a giant, literally like you put your hand inside your thigh at one point, like when you're laying in bed, right? You lift up and it's like somebody had just carved, you know, just this massive chunk out of your leg. Yeah. And you're like, this guy's not gonna make it i mean i felt i felt supported you know and i think here i mean that's the that's the thing is supported by your community gen your family or supported in like a like a more broader spiritual sense um

all of the above you know i i felt so the only i came out of a surgery test so you're talking about the hole in my my torso my ribs so indeed right so like in front of rich right now right you're missing a bunch of ribs i'm still missing those ribs i'm like pushing on my torso and it's like bobbing like a beach ball right now but um i had four two to three inch sections of ribs removed and coming out of that surgery, there was a miscommunication with, with the anesthesiologist. And I came off of that surgery on a lower epidural dose than I should have had. And I was in excruciating pain.

I was in the most pain I've ever felt in my life coming out of that surgery. And a friend of ours who does search and rescue with his dogs all over the world happened to be coming through Salt Lake and came into the ICU on that day to say hi to me and his name is Arturo Akuna a good friend and Arturo knelt by my bed as I'm just out of the surgery and starting to feel pain come on because the anesthesia of surgery is wearing off and arturo i'm in so much pain i can't speak i can't let alone just focus on breathing for hours i did this you know and arturo whispered in my ear about the earthquake in haiti

um you know almost what 10 years ago now or whenever that was. And he shares a very short story about his experience in Haiti for maybe a minute or two just to tee up the lesson, which is, hey, be grateful for what you do have. You're in the best house possible. You have the best care possible. You're surrounded by loved ones. There's no lack of blood for transf ones. There's no lack of blood

for transfusions. There's no lack of care. It could be worse. Except for that anesthesiologist who screwed it up. Yeah, you know, exactly. Exactly. And, and, but that, that just, that hit me like a ton of bricks, you know, just like, that's right. I, I'm doing, I'm doing great, all things considered. The thing that I think struck me the most in the whole movie is, and you could chalk it up to naivete or what have you, but there's something about you.

Like, throughout this whole process, you're in ICU 48 days. Yeah. Not once, I mean, maybe you did off camera, but like not once did I see you complain or play the victim. Like you have a smile on your face. You're making everyone who comes in to see you comfortable. And you have this not just hope, like optimism and just sense of joy and gratitude about you.

And I want to know like where that comes from because that's not faked. And I don't think that that was learned through the tragedy, the tragic accident. I think that's just part of who you are. That's core. Now that's core to who I am. That's core to who I am and I am, I can lead and I'm also a really good soldier.

I'm a really good team player. And in that scenario, the only thing that I was leading was attitude. If I could smile, if I could grin, if I could twinkle an eye, if I could really share that my genuine effort with everybody around me, they were going to lead in my recovery in that moment. And that was my job. Were you conscious of adopting that perspective or was that just natural? Yeah, both. I mean, it naturally occurred and came out of me. And then I was aware and encouraged by my own actions. Like, oh, yeah, this is what i can do this is

how to the point where a nurse you know a couple of my nurses would be like hey don't be afraid it's okay to grieve a little bit and be emotional and let it out because you don't want to be repressing emotions either and and that that was her concern in that one moment um, but like, I will share too, that that's my MO. That's how I, that's my typical approach. However, there is a Jekyll and Hyde in this guy. And, you know, to give my family credit and definitely, uh, my ex-girlfriend, Jenny Jane, who flew back from England to be my caregiver and help me and be by my side, you know, there were durations of time where I reflect back now and I'm like, I was really nasty. I had no patience. I had no tolerance. And, um, yeah,

but that's to be expected. Sure. But, you know, and so, so it's to be expected. And, but I think at some point I think that no matter, like, you know, you get a cough or a cold or when we are out of sorts, our patience drops, our tolerance level drops. That doesn't mean that's an excuse to take the piss and just kind of do that every time. We still owe it to ourselves and those we love and those around us to make the effort to be pleasant etc which i was but i'm just saying that even though the film shares i never made an edit on the film like they did a masterful job however i have had comments from folks say like hey like when did you

struggle because we don't see it in the film like we see it a little but you know what i saw was i mean the first time that you see you struggling with this is the day that you get out of the hospital and you're forced to like okay now it's time to go back to your life and it felt like and i don't know how much of this happens in the edit and what's real versus like you know creating a narrative but that's the first time where we see you break down and it feels like it's all dawning on you what has actually happened. Like you had to remain, like it's another type of fight or flight survival mode. Okay. You're in ICU for 48 days. Like you have to keep it together to survive this thing. And then once they release you, it's almost like a pressure valve release. And then you're like, oh, wait.

And it felt like a ton of bricks just landed on you. And you're like, oh, my God, that's what just happened. And this is where I'm at in my life. A hundred percent. That was the second sort of wake-up call, emotional wake-up call I had. And I was scared. I was freaked out. I was scared. was freaked out I was scared are you kidding me leaving the ICU after 50 days of almost dying and knowing that it's just me and Jen and

not 20 nurses and an on-call staff and a medication team and what were the doctors telling you like when you first came in and they have to say like you know what's the prognosis here what are we looking at um yeah uh Dr william morris who was the surgeon on call that did save my life um i think he's he's quoted as saying that's a bag of bones with a heartbeat basically like no chance yeah like, you were literally toast. Toast. Yeah. You know, and so I only now realize how close I was to dying that day. And even for the next three days, pretty dicey. You know, but for the emotional part, I just want to share, you know, Rich, you mentioned that scene where I'm walking out of the hospital.

I'm being discharged and I break down. And that's the first time we really see the sort of the beginnings of the emotional dawning of what's happening. And there was one moment prior because we talk about being strong in like the heat of the fire and how, you know, how to smile and be courageous in ICU and how that happened. And that was very much my personality, but there was a moment where Jen and I were watching a movie. She was on my left side. And so that's the, so it watching a film on our laptop. So I'm in my hospital bed. Jen is either in the bed with me or sitting next, right next to it. And we're watching my laptop, watching a movie. And in my mind, I am caressing her knee.

Like I have my hand on her knee and I'm like, just, you know, touching it, just like you would kind of put a hand on your significant, you know? And then at some point I look over and it hits, and I realized like, I don't have a hand on my left arm anymore. And what I was feeling was 30 years of memory that when you sit next to someone you care about to watch a movie, you throw an arm over and you just touch them on their leg or their shoulder. Like a phantom limb thing. Yeah, it was in my mind.

It was so real. And I remember just breaking down in that moment that there was going to have to be a whole mental shift that you no longer have a left hand guy. So they amputate up to like halfway up your forearm, right? That's about where it is. And what do they do to your torso and your head and your thigh? Do they graft skin on there?

Like what was the process of like healing from that yeah I mean the for the most part that 48 day stay was you know up to 12 surgeries which was every other day every three days every four days a surgery grafting skin harvesting skin from a healthy part of your body and using it to cover and rebuild skin on a wound site. You know, and that was every day, you know, and actually we stopped my surgery short. We stopped my surgery short because it was, let's say it was mid way through my stay.

One of my exit wounds was in my scrotum. And as the surgeons through their process are cleaning up all the dead tissue on my body i go into a surgery and they i come out of the surgery and they're like you know you get a report or a debrief and you know hey we couldn't save your left testy or whatever it was and you know i'm losing so many body parts and bits and pieces that it's just kind of like, okay. Yeah, you didn't think that was on the menu? No, man. And I bet there's some listeners being like,

whoa, whoa, whoa, what are we talking about? Like, you think it's bad and then it's like, all right, you know, you're gonna lose this too. Yeah. You're like, but that wasn't part of the deal. No, it wasn't. And yet, so the doctor leaves, right? you're gonna lose this too yeah like but that wasn't part of the deal no it wasn't and and and yet so the doctor leaves right and and my brother's in the room and and jen and i don't know who else

and i and the nurse there's a nurse in the room and i just kind of share to the room maybe my brother whoever like huh well i never need never liked that one anyway that was one that always gave me problems and i don't know if my brother asked, well, what do you mean by problems? Or if I shared, but years prior while yachting, years, years prior, I remember having a pain in my groin. I remember having a doctor check it out,

squeeze, squeeze, pull, pull. You look fine. You're on your feet 20 hours a day. You're probably just pulled to something, take an ibuprofen. And I just put that idea to bed that I needed to look into my physical health. But in that moment when they're like, oh, you just lost your left testy, I thought to myself, like that memory shot up. And I was like, oh, wait.

Years ago, I had an issue with that thing, like good riddance. My brother chases the surgeon down the hall and is's like hey just want to throw this out there after you left the room eduardo mentioned this and i don't know what you do with that and so that kind of set an alarm off in the doctor's head or the surgeons and they so they went to every body part that every piece that leaves you goes to the lab and they run results so he had that test he ran and it came back with positive tumor markers for seminoma testicular cancer so you just can't get a break yeah right yeah yeah there's that fun there's a the funny scene in the movie where chen's like yeah you know because you you had your ups and downs in this

relationship and and she's in a position where she has to sign off on the removal of the testicle of her ex-boyfriend. And she also is like, well, good riddance. Yeah, exactly. Right? Exacting her little revenge as she's taking care of you 24 hours a day. Yeah, totally. Jen is a voracious screenwriter and sticks sticks to comedy stand-up comedian as well and so just that actual reality that the girlfriend that got cheated on gets to sign away right the ex-boyfriend's

you know testicles like i mean how good does it get yeah you can't you can't write you can't script that but i mean come on like all right you're literally hanging on for your life yeah it's like oh by the, you have testicular cancer. And then they find it in your spine. So then of course, I mean, the red lights go on, the sirens blare, and I get a whole panel done and CAT scans. And there was a mass of tissue in my lower abdomen right up against my spine that was just assumed to be trauma related to the electrocution, but not of concern. And now all of a sudden they're like, wait a minute, that could be a second stage tumor. And so, I mean, it was just insane. I, you know, I'm, I don't even know how to talk about it in short verse, you know, because I'm in the hospital having my life saved.

Limbs are getting chopped off left, right, and center. I'm losing all these pieces of my body. And I'm just trying to make it through these surgeries, man. You know, like I am just trying to see the light at the end of the tunnel, to be courageous, to not give up, to believe that it's all going to be cool. And then, oh, and you have testicular cancer, by the way. And so at that point, I was just, I remember being frustrated and I mean, frustrated, that's it. That's it. Right. But frustrated because I was eagerly anticipating knocking these things out and getting back to life, like just getting back to what I wanted to go do, et cetera. And now I have to stop my surgeries.

I go do rigorous chemotherapy in Montana for three months. I got the choice, Salt Lake City or go home. I went home. Where were you in the process of recovering from all the injuries at that point? Right. So, I mean, halfway, I still injuries at that point. Like, right. So, I mean, halfway, I still had pending surgeries, reconstruct, reconstructing my scalp. Um, so I, we stopped, you know, we stopped, we kind of closed all my wounds up, got myself stable,

went through chemotherapy. And then when I finished my last round of chemo, took up remedial surgery on my amputated forearm to clean up that site, and then did another year's worth of plastic surgery work on my scalp. So it really, I mean, it slowed things down and extended another 12 months of recovery and surgeries. I mean, you're trying to, your body's trying to repair itself

from these cataclysmic injuries, and then, you know, okay, so now we're going to just bombard it with chemotherapy and just crush your immune system and just i can't imagine like you know the the body must have just been like shut down yeah you know yeah um it and that i mean it was i mean that's not what does? It kills all your rapidly producing cells. And I had a goal. If I hiked every single day that I sat in that infusion chair, I would, like, keep.

It was, like, me against chemotherapy. And I may not win, at least stay above it, but I was going to meet it toe-to-toe every day. Right. Yeah. And you're cancer-free now. Yeah. As I'm told, I get a checkup once a year. Right, right, right, right.

Wow. So, so how many surgeries all told? About 21. Yeah. Yeah. How did they fix your head? It's amazing. I have, listen, man, I, plastic surgery, you know, it's such a misnomer that, I mean, plastic surgery is for all of these, you know,

we use them for whatever we want plastic surgery to be. But I never forget walking into Corey Agrawal's, my surgeon's office, and there's all these different breast cup sizes on her counter as a display, you know, like dozens of them. And, you know, that's her work. So she, you know, she's talking about what they are. And then I realized like plastic surgery is, is a incredible piece of technology that allows people to return back to their most complete physical sense, you know? And so for me, I had two giant, like the size of an orange wounds in my scalp where my skull was attached, but my scalp was gone. One on my forehead, which you can't see, and one on the right side of my head.

And they basically inserted baggies and stretched my skin out. And when there was enough elasticity in that stretched skin, they pulled it over the chunk of skull that no longer had scalp. I mean, just extraordinary process. Yeah. Cause I can't looking at you right now, like I can't see anything, but when you watch the movie, you're like, oh my God, you know, and your torso, you know, in the movie, you see without your shirt on, like once it's healed, it's remarkable how normal it looks. The surgeons did an incredible job keeping my torso symmetrical so my my latissimus

was is connected from your hip and runs up to your scapula and they removed they they disconnected it from my hip and and brought it basically out the side and then what's called a muscle flap and they used it and pulled it over my torso and my abdominals to cover that lack of body matter. Right. That was, you know, my obliques, half of my obliques, half of my pectoral muscle on my left side were all removed. And the way the surgeon says, he's like, we just removed all this muscle from you and we have to fill it back in with something. Yeah. But you still have unbelievable range of motion considering you're lacking all that,

those structural muscles on one side of your body. Like, how are you even able to like move your arm and your shoulder? Like, how does that? So I asked that question. I saw you doing pull-ups. Like, how does that work without lats? I asked that question.

I said, so like, how does this work? You know, you're telling me half of my obliques, all left side, half my obliques, half my pectoral, my abdominals, my latissimus all being removed and it either is gone or being you know my latissimus is still there but it's brought over and no longer serving a different place yeah it's just at your feet as a filler and my doctor just you know it's like well you have all of these subset of mine subsets of minor muscle groups

below the major groups. And with the big group not present or that large muscle not present, those smaller muscles are going to kick into gear and start working and developing and growing stronger in lieu of big brother, no longer being there. And that's what I've experienced. I mean, it look when, you know, I'm missing a huge chunk of my left quadricep and i don't know if anyone out there believes in karma or what it is but i'm like all of these things are left side on my body whether it's the hand the testicle the muscles everything it's all left side for the most part and so you'd think that the entire left side of my movements would be totally off and um i am just grateful that the way I was put back together that I can run and jump and bike and swim and do my thing

without really, with no noticeable skew to the left type movements, which is incredible. When you're running, it looks totally normal. Yeah. Which is crazy. I mean, the amount of muscle removed from your quad is like, you know, a giant sirloin. Yeah, and yet when I hike, if I'm going vertical up a hill or if I'm by any,

if I'm locomotive, I'm moving, I don't feel that. And I truly believe that whatever, that all the supporting muscles just rallied on that side and said, this side needs to be as strong as the other side. Let's go. It's interesting that the only real injury on your right side is in your head to the brain, but the right side of the brain controls the left side.

Right? That's wild. That is wild. Yeah. And we should say, just because I don't know that we've made it clear, these injuries, like it was the electricity leaving your body, right?

The electricity like exiting your body literally through your skull, through your torso, and through your quad. Yeah, nine different exit points. And your hand, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's crazy. But you have some scars on your right hand.

Is that from something different? No, that's exit. That's exit too. They're just a little less severe than the other ones. Yeah. Isn't that something? You know, you look at those scars, you know, and I always say that our scars are sort of the roadmap that shows us how we got here. You know, emotional scars, physical scars.

Yeah. And I think, you know, that's sort of how you in the movie, like, how do you, you know, looking back on this experience, like how do you process it and like, how do you think about how it informs your life? Yeah. I, I, I'll just say quite simply, I'm still working on that. I woke up today in LA and came out here and my morning was spent talking to my fiance about our future plans right now. And I'm reminded every single day in a very positive, welcoming way about this injury. day in a very positive, welcoming way about this injury. You know, it's like, I don't wake up every day and say, oh man, I wish I wasn't an amputee or, oh man, you know, like I wish I hadn't lost

three years of my life to that. It's rather like, oh man, what am I doing today? And I'm going to be sure to not agree to do anything or to put myself into any scenario that's not exactly how I want my life to be. So it's, you know, in so many ways on the outside and at first glance, if you, if we've never met and you never heard the story, it's like, that's the most tragic thing I've ever heard. And then on the other hand, it's like a blessing because it's a daily reminder to just go get it. And then on the other hand, it's like a blessing because it's a daily reminder to just go get it. Do you wish that it hadn't happened? Or do you feel like in some weird way by having these things removed that it has completed you? I do not wish that this didn't happen.

Hold on a second. You don't wish that it didn't happen? Wait, what is that? Some folks are like, oh, would you go back? Yeah. Would you go back if you could go back to 2011 and not get electrocuted? Would you do it? And at this point, like, no.

I love the person I am today. you do it and at this point absolutely like no i love the person i am today and i am blessed with the opportunity to still be alive and share my experience with others like my that it enriches my experience. My mom says something along the lines of, we all need to, we all are well-served understanding humility. And look, I'm not saying anyone wishes something like this on anybody. The point being is that humility can be found through so many different ways. And I could tell you right now that I am better off today

than I was prior to this injury, given sort of my connection with my heart, my true self, my desires, my physical person in the world. Prior to that, probably a little imbalanced, probably getting a little too far ahead of myself with like, I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna be this, and I'm gonna go this way. And more so today, in large part because of this injury, I don't get so far away from that,

like, hey, don't forget who you are and who you need to be in this world. Yeah, you've literally been forced to slow down physically. Like there's those sequences in the movie where it's like, you wanna go in the kitchen and like bam, bam, bam, and like do it the way it's like, no, it's not gonna work that way, dude. You're gonna have to like chill, like chill, bro, right?

But that compulsion on a very physical level to slow down seems like it then makes its way into your kind of emotional, spiritual body and perspective to go, hey man, let's just like be here right now. Let's like, how can we honor this moment in a different way? Yeah, we started this conversation talking about a show called Active Ingredient, whereby pre-injury Eduardo believed that there,

you know, that we are all the integral part of our own best recipe of self, right? And like I wrote that show, you know, like I believed that, and yet post-injury, I get to i get to like i live and walk that now way more than that's super interesting because yeah you it's almost like you literally had to burn in this fire to become that person that you sort of thought you were beforehand that you were trying to embody but you actually weren't that guy now you are that guy you can carry that vibration in a way that when,

because I'm sure it's going to happen, this show happens, that you can be that impactful voice that you always wanted to be, that perhaps you thought you were before, but now you actually really are. Like in recovery, they always say, like, you can't transmit something you haven't got. You can talk about transm transmit something you haven't got. You can talk about transmitting something you haven't got, but if you're not backing it up with actually who you are and your life experience, like if you haven't lived it enough, then you can talk about it, but it's not going to connect with anyone else. Yeah. Like unconsciously we know, you know. Like is that guy full of it or is that guy like the real thing?

Yeah, exactly. And across the board right so like whether it's you know the eduardo pre the injury wanted to share my love of life with the world on the largest platform possible okay i'm going to be a tv show host and i'm going to create and sell a tv show the why behind that was genuine and authentic but like only like it just didn't maybe it didn't have that level of understanding and and like authentic experience to add to it uh you you know and you know as well as with the food company you know with Max. I had been cooking for most of my adult life, and I had been cooking for the last decade for families, for kids, really inspired by the fact that I was a conduit between life and death for people.

We got to eat every day. So being a part of how people eat was a beautiful part of my life and like going into that injury but coming out of that injury still having the food company montana max i only came out of that injury stronger in every single conviction like yes i still want to share my passion with the world and my belief that we are our own active ingredient yes i want to talk to the world on the largest scale possible about how national food companies can be free of all of this junk,

of all of this stuff, can be philanthropic, can give back, can make better business sense. I mean, in every step, in every sense of the word, stronger. Well, you're a literal conduit between life and death in a very different way than what you described, you know, you could carry prior, right? Yeah.

Yeah. Like in an emotional way. Yeah, charged. I mean, what's funny, it's like grounded too like you literally like you know the word grounded like from you know in an electrical sense you know but grounded in a very emotional and and and spiritual sense as well like you can own your you can own your footing in a way that you couldn't before and look you don't do especially as a young person like you don't like aspire to have a TV show unless there's some ego involved. Right. So what is the, and that's fine. Ego is fine unless it's out of balance. So what is the balance of ego in that equation versus from then versus now? Yeah. The, uh, I think

there's a certain amount of maybe, I mean, you can, I mean, help me out. You know, maybe there's a word outside of ego that is that thing within you that knows it is desirable, knows that it is capable, knows that it is valuable. And, you know, I think we associate ego into the sense of I, I am this, I am that. of I, I am this, I am that. And yet at some point I needed a certain amount of whatever that was just to make it through that time. Sure. I needed to believe that I could do this. I was gonna be okay. Like I could add value to the team around me.

But the humility that is often not present with ego is definitely something that I pulled out of that fire. It's like, I can believe in myself all day long, but you need to be yourself too. And yourself is not that guy that you left behind 10 years ago or that, you know? Yeah. I would imagine that it's some combination of like the strength that comes from self-belief that I guess on some part it's derived from ego. And if there isn't a word from what you just described, there should be.

Balancing that against deep humility and really like a surrender to the fact that you have so little control over this, right? Like you're in that boat being tossed around by those waves and you're in an ICU, you know, at the behest of a team of doctors who are doing their best, but like, there's very little that you can do. What are the things you can control?

You can control your attitude, how you're acting towards, you know, your medical staff and the loved ones that are caretaking for you and your frame of mind, your optimism or pessimism about what is actually occurring in real time. Yeah, it's true. But the surrender part,

and I think this gets, I'm interested in your thoughts on this. I think what gets lost when we talk about surrender is that we, we sort of think that that means giving up or, you know, that letting go is a weakness. But in my experience, and I'm interested in yours, like surrendering creates like a freedom and a different kind of strength to approach a problem from a more empowered and humble

perspective that ultimately, in my experience, leads to better results. Yeah. ultimately, in my experience, leads to better results. Yeah. I agree, and I think from my perspective, nothing is stronger than truth, right? Like, truth is bedrock. And for every opportunity since this injury and moving forward, because, you know, post this injury, there were a lot of moments that challenged my truth. And I've had to recognize them and decline to engage in whatever those were.

whatever those were and you wake up at 30 something and you're missing all of these body parts right and you're no longer who you were and you just can't lie to yourself like you can't you don't have that left hand you are no longer symmetrical you're no longer the person you were prior. It's just not true. And so owning the truth of this is the me going forward is also becomes sort of like the foundation of, all right, do I want to do that thing? I don't know. Is that who I am is to say yes to that or agree to that? Or is it to decline it and say no?

And so to your point of giving up, it's not like, honestly, I think it's, let's say it's nothing to do with giving up. It's actually a super strong, bold, powerful move is to just make a decision based on truth. You know? And yeah, I don't, that is the power for me anyway. I think that the hard part for a lot of people is trying to divine what that truth is though. Sure. And yet I think if you boil it down though, sure and and yet i think if you boil it down though and you you look at yourself naked in the mirror and it's like well here's what it is somewhere what makes you happy what makes you sing what fuels your fire do something small do something small you know on like by the hour by the day by the week by the month and for me go you know, in chemo, when I was going through all my

treatments for three months, for me, it was reading and it was hiking outside. And I could maybe only hike for 10 minutes on any given one day. And then all of a sudden it was 15 minutes and then it was two hours and then, you know, it was half a day. But I knew that that, here's the thing though, too, is I knew I needed that. I knew that that was going to just keep me moving. But at some point I recognized that I was taking advantage of that too. And I wasn't growing. I was just comfortably being like, oh, I'm going to hike every single day and this is going to solve everything.

This is going to keep me cool. And at some point I had to push out of that. Well, I think part of the lesson, you know, as somebody who, a hyperactive kid wants to be outdoors, can't sit still, you know, in the kitchen, you know, I would imagine like, you know, sort of thriving on the chaotic, you know, like environment of being in a kitchen, like all of that is like, that's your, that's your like mana, like that's your fuel. The dance. And here you just get sidelined where you have to stop and you cannot do these things that are part and parcel of who you are.

But I would imagine on some emotional level are almost like ways of escaping or not dealing with things that you really need to work through if you wanna become fully actualized to become a whole person. And you have to have these body parts removed in order to confront that and become whole so that you can sit here today and do the things that you that you do yeah i think it's it's interesting is

um like that moment central park 2013 with a group called the challenge athletes foundation out of San Diego, the group that kind of got me involved in triathlon sports. It's an incredible organization. Oh, my gosh. They check them out if you haven't. They do terrific work. And a friend is a big supporter and recommended I check out the Challenge Athletes Foundation. And they invite me to their big fundraiser event on the East Coast and there's a fun run in the morning central park and i show up you know kind of you know t-shirt with my prosthetic on wearing like skate shoes and skate shorts like i don't know

not really ready to run maybe i had tennis shoes first like kind of like sort of legit structured race type of that kind of thing. Yeah. This is, yeah. And this is a fun run, but this is what it is, is this is the first time that I have, um, stepped into a room of people's, not all of who have disabilities,

but into a room that recognizes the, the, the person with a disability and says like, you're an amputee and it's not a bad thing. It's like, that's how they're just defining like, cool. You're 13 years old and you're male or, you know, Oh, you're an amputee below the elbow. Cool. You know, what sports do you do? Or it was like, it was just like, boom, it was like saying, what's your name? You know? And I, and for me, that like, I had to give up or I had to throw my hands in the air and say,

I give up on this notion that I can hide and protect the old Eduardo. Like when my hair was falling out, going through chemo, my sideburns stayed on for some random reason. So I could wear a beanie and maybe it looked like I still had hair, you know? And then whatever. I look at photos of that now and it's like, what were you thinking? You didn't have eyebrows, man. Yeah. But you don't, you don't strike me as a guy who's like trying to hide. I mean, like in the movie, you're like having fun pulling your hair out with Jen. And I was like, wow, like that's, you know. And so to be fair though, Rich, that was in my home. That was in private.

Like I didn't go out. I didn't, you know, like other than my family, like I remember having Passover in Montana and my grandparents were there. And I like, I didn't ask my grandmother, but I kind of just told her I was considering not wearing my hat at dinner inside. But I always wear my hat because my head's got this big divot. And I haven't finished all these surgeries because my surgeries were put on hold. So my head was like bald, no hair, big, big, big open, like, you know, divot in the back of it. Really like disfigured looking. And she just looked at me. She's like, Eddie, we don't love your head we

love you take the hat off you know and so for so when i went to that run with the challenge athletes foundation in central park i gave up the idea that i needed to hold on to the old me and an 18 year old kid thomas kane was my catalyst he came up he was like hi i'm a thomas and i was like hey i'm eduardo and he immediately just zeros in on my left hand he's like you're gonna run with that on and he's pointing at my prosthetic it's like saying hey rich are we gonna go do a marathon tomorrow are you bringing your backpack you want your backpack you know like you're not gonna run with that on and i just had never considered that i could comfortably take off my prosthetic in public and just have my forearm exposed.

And I did in that moment. I surrendered, and I just owned it. I said, I need to own whoever I am right now today. Like, I need to love this person. I need to be proud of this person, and I need to be an active part of whoever I am moving forward, not stuck in this old concept of self. And how did that feel to take it off and do that run?

Gosh, I mean, I was like- You hadn't run without it or you hadn't like, you just never, you're always covering it up in public. I hadn't moved without it being on. Like I'd gone to bed, I'd take it off at the end of the day and I'd go to bed, but I hadn't really done anything active without it on. And it was, you ever seen like a, you know,

an animal frolic through the fields? It's likeing you know like feel free yeah it was liberating and and you know it i cried it was like man like not i can do this like i can i can still run well how far can i run and so i mean immediately that night at the fundraiser you know it's in the walter fest story downtown manhattan 800 people in the room and someone like nudges me they're like eduardo are we gonna see you at our triathlon and i was like yeah and then i woke up the next morning i was like wait a minute what's a triathlon like you know and no no i no concept of what i had just done other than i was just super jazzed with the freedom to be me again. Yeah, and you've gone on and done lots of stuff

with CAF, right? Every year, yeah. Every year, every year do a handful of triathlons or events and support them in any way we can. So I saw, I noticed that you somehow strapped like a big hand paddle on your left forearm to compensate a little bit, like school, how you make those adjustments. Yeah, for swimming.

And I'm still working on my bike adjustment. Do you have a different sort of attachment to allow you to grip the handlebar? How does that work? Yeah, imagine like a Pac-Man hand, you know? So you can just kind of uh flex it around the round handlebar um they i mean they're and there's there's a lot out there for um amputees and then i mean that's what the challenge athletes foundation specifically what they do is they're

like you want to be a paralympic snowboarder you want to be a rugby basketball player or a wheelchair rugby player for kids to adults of all ages. So for me, I have a hand in a special carbon fiber attachment that I use for biking specific. Yeah, they help get those very specialized athletic advantages to those people. Yeah. And so now, like, lucky me like lucky me right like now i'm an amputee i get to understand this whole new part of being human which is living with a disability or whatever you want to call it and so then i i you know so it impacts every part of me like i'll talk about our food company montana mex and just that like we've always wanted to be a company that was organic, was free of

preservatives, was free of colorings, was free of any chemicals, was transparent, was not, you know, doing its best to be a great contribution to people's lives in the world around us. That's pre-injury. And like you said, like, you know, you can't transmit something until you have it. And then after my injury i mean we kept the company open while the whole company was in icu with me brother sister myself you know we had one employee still running the show you know and now montana max represents so much more in that it's living and breathing like before my, why we wanted these products to be the cleanest, best they could be for people.

And now they still are those, but now we partnered with the challenge athletes foundation, put them on our label. So now we get to be like, Hey, we don't just want this company to succeed from a business point of view. We want this company to really add value. And,

you know, by the end of the year, know that we have executed our business successfully enough to actually give back to others not just food but help a kid get that rugby wheelchair so cool so you divert some of the revenue towards caf every year is that how it works five percent yeah that's cool yeah five percent of proceeds that's awesome man what what I saw some video of you with like the actual hand, the bionic hand. Do you still have that? I do.

You do? Oh, my gosh. How come you don't wear that? I get a drawer full of them. Do you? I do. Yeah, there's a great story of when my girlfriend, my now fiancee, moved in and she discovered the hand drawer. She's like, ah, freaked out and like kicked it closed.

And, you know, I guess I forgot to mention that the lower drawer to the right in the bathroom was the hand drawer. I was like, ah, freaked out and like kicked it closed. And, you know, I guess I forgot to mention that the lower drawer to the right in the bathroom was the hand drawer. And- Like she just stumbled into some weird circus from the 1920s or something. And I wasn't home. So, you know, but, you know, I found that

I have friends who are bilateral amputees. So they have, they're missing both limbs and it really serves them well to have a prosthetic that is powered through a motor and that communicates with sensors to the muscles in whatever part of the body is affected. And for me, I, I've had those, I've worn them and I never really progressed far enough to a place that I was really excited to use them. For me, it was just like, it's too slow. It doesn't really work as well as I want it to. And I found that what I'm wearing right now is a, I would say this is your more typical prosthetic you're used to seeing upper bodied people. So there's a hook and it's pulled and powered by a cable that's attached to a harness on my shoulder so it's all body-powered movements

right and the beauty power beauty of this is that i can get it wet i can beat it up i can fix it with what's in my suitcase yeah it's indestructible and if it breaks it's not a hundred thousand dollars to repair yeah and also you're diversifying your uh your your dexterity because that can do things your hand can't do if you have two hands they do the same thing but that can probably do a bunch of stuff your hand can't right it's true the the hook has come in handy yeah i had uh do you know paul de gelder i do not he's a um a double amputee who survived a shark attack and i had him on here here's got a crazy story he got attacked by a nine-foot bull shark in sydney harbor and he's he's the equivalent of like a

australian navy seal and now he does shark preservation and you know his story is different than yours but also similar in the way that he's like using what happened to empower other people, but also give back to causes. And, you know, it's just cool that, that he, he still goes and dives with sharks and he's all about like preserving this animal that literally almost took his life,

should have taken his life. Right. But he had the actual hand and it was amazing that how you can, you know, make all the finger, like the level at which this technology has developed to is really quite shocking a hundred percent a hundred percent freedom it's giving people yeah no i and so you know i'm 36 years old and you know the i the way that my body now works with a prosthetic left hand

is not how it's supposed to be i have to put a lot of pressure into making this hook work every day. Right. And, you know, I feel it in my joints. And so one day I may shift to a myoelectric powered hand. But for now, it serves me. I can beat it up and use it as a hammer. What has been the most challenging part of this whole journey for you? Like what gets lost in the narrative that we see

out in the world about you or what do people not understand and you know something that that has been difficult for you yeah um you know i i think there's a certain level of, um, I keep wanting to say confusion, but it's, it's, it's,

it's, it's, there's a, there's a certain amount of me that feels I owe everyone and everything so much to the point that I, it's really become a challenge for me to make sure that I'm still focused on what I need, even though I've said that so many times just over the last hour with you in that, I mean, how many times when this film, like this film came out of nowhere, I mean, like, let's say there was no documentary. I would have, you know, gone back to work and I

would have worked on the food brand and worked on the TV show and Eduardo and his life. This documentary kind of came out of nowhere. you know, follows me through whatever public medium, just the part they don't see is the struggle to present, continue to present this life because I'm very proud to still be alive. I'm very grateful. And I feel like sharing this film with others, sharing my story with others is beneficial to many. And I know it, I've heard it.

I get the feedback every day by the dozens. But then there's a part that really struggles with saying like i want to hermit up i want to go find my retreat and um what i'm working on right now is is not doing the extreme of either and rather just finding the balance of how much time do i need to work on preserving my sense of self and my own energy and my own compass north so that i can't still be in service of others yeah well if you lose sight of that then you don't have anything to give anyway none you know none but i can't yeah i can imagine the the the demands on you to show up here and there and they're probably all cool and sound like fun, but your tank will quickly empty. Well, and like, it's tough, man. I, like I, you know,

so my, my dad passed away last November and the film has offered me this incredible two year time period where I'm being interviewed with my dad and we're putting together content for this documentary without which I would not have like incredible, incredible pieces of pearls of wisdom in the form of video or written or edited or recorded. or written or edited or recorded. And so like I'm all for this process. I'm all for sharing charge. I'm all for sharing myself out there with the world.

But at the same time, I just, I feel like I get a little lost in, I'm hungry for things. So like if I wanna go do something, I'm really wanna go do it. And it's still continually very hard feeling guilty of not giving myself to others when I'm just like, man, I'm falling apart in here. Like I need to be at home. I need to tend to my own tools. I need to tend to my own field here.

I need to like get myself in order so I can continue to give for the rest of my life to others. Yeah. That's a hard balance. Yeah, but you live in Montana, right? It'd be harder if you lived here maybe, or like New York or something. You get to go home to your retreat and take care of yourself. I do.

Say no a little bit. I do. I mean, I did 220 days. Have somebody else say no for you. I did 220 days traveling last year. How about fancy agency? Say no. I'm telling you.

You know what I mean? I do. Yeah. What's been the most kind of interesting or impactful experience that you've had in sharing the movie and going around and screening it the this isn't an example this is a non-specific example of what's happened many times but um when when an individual watch is charged not knowing knowing what it is, but they just, it shows up on their feed or they watch, they're at a festival and they just, you know, the festival uses a

poster of me with a fly rod. This literally happened. And a guy and his gal went in and thought they were going to a fly fishing film. Right. Hello. You know, not a fly. There's some fly fishing in there. Yeah. And, and yet this guy raises his hand in the Q&A. And he's like, I'm a veteran. I was, you know, in Afghanistan and in Iraq and these wars. I have lived in this town my whole life. And nobody, this is the first time I've ever said this publicly, but I struggle every single day. X, Y, and Z.

And I thought I was going to a fly-fishing film today and yet through your through watching your journey and I am inspired to stand up right now because I know that my community is in this room small film festival in Martha's Vineyard and he looks around he's like I feel empowered to share my true self which is I'm this guy he says his name and i struggle every day and it feels really great to say that right now after 15 years that's it man that's that's the first step in healing that kind of share your story powerful yeah share your story i think that's a good place to wrap it up dude it was pretty good i'm grateful how do you I, uh, I'm inspired to get home, plant my garden.

Good man. Well, we'll get you home, man. I really appreciate your time. Uh, especially even more now knowing that, that, uh, you have a, a tricky relationship with coming out and talking. So, uh, I don't take it for granted, man. It's really powerful. And I know that everybody listening is, is, is going to be really impacted by it. So, um, thank you. My pleasure.

Um, if you want to, uh, connect with Eduardo, uh, you can check out his incredible line of food products, Montana, max Montana,

max.com, right? That's it. Uh, definitely check out charged. That's all we've been talking about for the last hour and a half. I know you can see it on Amazon and you can see it on Vimeo. Are there other places to check it out?

Amazon, Vimeo, iTunes. iTunes, all those places. Cool. Charged the movie. And if people want to connect with you directly, what's the best place for them to do that? Or maybe you just don't want them to. No, please say hi, either on Instagram at Chef Eduardo Garcia,

or go to chefeduardo.com and say hi. And I'll be looking for that new TV show. Yeah, do it. When it happens, come back and talk to me about it. I will, I'm hoping to see you at a Challenge Athletes Foundation. Oh, I would love to. Try, so. I know, I'm sure you know Bob Babette, right?

Absolutely. Yeah, I know Bob. So I would love to, I've been invited in the past and for whatever reason I haven't been able to make it but I would love to so I can make that commitment to you

yes cool right on man peace nice what did I tell you I told you it was an incredible story

I think you delivered on that promise in any event I really hope that you enjoyed that conversation just a reminder that the podcast is also viewable in its entirety on YouTube at youtube.com forward slash ritual. Check it out there. Hit that subscribe button while you're at it and let Eduardo know what you thought of today's conversation by hitting him up on Instagram

at chef Eduardo Garcia. Also definitely check out charged on iTunes, Amazon, or Vimeo. There's a link in the show notes to that. On the subject of show notes, check them out. We put a lot of time into them. It will take your edification, your experience of today's conversation beyond those earbuds stuck into your ear. If you're looking for nutritional guidance, check out our meal planner, meals.richroll.com. We're offering thousands of plant-based recipes, all customized based on your personal preferences.

We have unlimited grocery lists, even grocery delivery in most US cities with international delivery rolling out soon. Available to you for just $1.90 a week when you sign up for a year. To learn more and to sign up, go to Meals.RichRoll.com or click on Meal Planner on the top menu on my website.

If you would like to support my work, please subscribe on Apple Podcasts or on Google Podcasts or on whatever platform you enjoy this content, YouTube, anybody, and share it with your friends and on social media. That's the best way. You can also support my work on Patreon at richroll.com forward slash donate. And I want to thank everybody who helped put on the show today. Jason Camiolo for audio engineering, production, show notes, interstitial music. Blake Curtis and Margo Lubin for video editing and graphics. Reese Robinson for portraits and theme music, as always, by Annalema.

Thanks for the love, you guys. I'm going to see you back here in a couple of days with an incredible podcast with this guy called John McAvoy. I recorded it in London. It's not going to be on video because we just did it in a conference room there, but I'm telling you, I'm not going to say too much other than that it is one of the most intense and compelling podcasts I have ever, ever conducted. Until then, be well, love large, and what else do I want to say? Eat plants. Peace out. Thank you.