The Rich Roll Podcast - High Functioning: The Hidden Depression That May Be Stealing Your Joy & The Tools To Get It Back With Dr. Judith Joseph
Episode Date: May 12, 2025Dr. Judith Joseph is a Harvard-trained psychiatrist, clinical professor at NYU Medical School, and a renowned voice on high-functioning depression. In this conversation, we explore the paradox of ach...ievement and anhedonia—the curious, often painful reality that success doesn't always equate to joy. Judith shares her clinical insights into why so many high performers feel emotionally flat, walking us through her integrative approach to mental health and her groundbreaking "5 V's" framework for reclaiming points of joy. This one hit close to home. I found myself confronting how we chase achievement while disconnecting from what truly matters in life. Judith is a rare voice—wise, warm, grounded in science, and even more so in compassion. This one will land where it's needed most. Enjoy! Show notes + MORE Watch on YouTube Newsletter Sign-Up Today’s Sponsors: iFit: Use the code RICHROLL to get 10% off any purchase of $999+ 👉NordicTrack.com/richroll On: High-performance shoes & apparel crafted for comfort and style 👉on.com/richroll AG1: Get a FREE bottle of Vitamin D3+K2 AND 5 free AG1 Travel Packs 👉drinkAG1.com/richroll OneSkin: Get started today with 15% off using code RICHROLL at oneskin.co Squarespace: Use the code RichRoll to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain 👉Squarespace.com/RichRoll WHOOP: The all-new WHOOP 5.0 is here! Get your first month FREE👉join.whoop.com/Roll Modern Elder: Join Chip Conley and me in LA on June 5th to design your next chapter. Early bird pricing is available until May 20th. Go to www.meawisdom.com/richroll to learn more.IQBAR: Get 20% OFF all IQBAR products plus FREE shipping. Just text RICHROLL to sixty-four thousand. Message and data rates may apply. Check out all of the amazing discounts from our Sponsors 👉 richroll.com/sponsors Find out more about Voicing Change Media at voicingchange.media and follow us @voicingchange
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Quick announcement before we dive in,
by the time you hear this episode,
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So that's it for now.
Love you and hope you love the episode.
You were built with the DNA for joy.
It is literally built into your DNA,
but you just forgot how to access it.
For those with high functioning depression,
they have the symptoms of depression,
but they're not stopping, they're overdoing.
You can still access those moments of joy
and tell yourself you're worthy of it.
That's where you begin.
Understand the signs of your happiness.
When we know what we're working with,
when we know why we are the way we are,
we're able to make better decisions,
and we are less stressed.
We cope by busying ourselves.
Just acknowledging it and being aware of it
allows you to change.
I'm not saying you have to stop, I'm saying to slow down.
Hey everybody, welcome to the podcast.
So I think I wanna start this one by saying
that I would consider myself a high achiever
and a pretty high functioning one at that.
This is something that I've always prided myself on,
this drive that I have that I think I developed
pretty early in life and have deployed to great effect
over the course of my life.
This commitment that I have to kind of outwork
my talent deficits and this engine that I think
really deserves credit
for much of my success as an athlete,
as a student back in the day, as a writer,
and now as a podcaster.
But I also know the dark side of this disposition,
the unhealthy fear-based scarcity mindset part of it
that developed, I think, as a response
to some unhealed past traumas from childhood
that leave me a little bit vulnerable
to overlooking many other important aspects of life
to my detriment and the detriment of those around me.
And when this goes unchecked, I've noticed in myself
that I can become
more irritable, more withdrawn.
I can get riddled with anxiety.
My sleep becomes impaired.
And there's also this numbness to it.
It kind of sneaks up on you.
And it makes it difficult to feel things, especially joy,
which then all becomes very weird and confusing
and really like guilt inducing
because I have so much to be grateful for
and such a fantastic life.
So in the past, when I've flirted with this,
I basically chalked it up to burnout
or something like burnout
or something nearing burnout at the least.
It's only more recently that I discovered
that this is actually something different,
something that has a name
and that name is high functioning depression,
which is super weird because A,
doesn't seem like these two things go together,
high functioning and depression.
And B, I'm not depressed, not at all,
at least not in any traditional sense of the word.
But apparently this is a thing.
And it's something that is only recently getting attention
and being researched and also much more widespread
than you might suspect.
So today we're gonna talk all about it,
this thing called high functioning depression,
what it is, what it isn't, how to know if you have it,
what to do to avoid it or overcome it,
and why it's so vital for all of us to better understand it.
And we're gonna do it with the world's leading expert on it.
Her name is Dr. Judith Joseph, and she is fantastic.
Judith is a psychiatrist and professor of psychiatry
at NYU Medical School.
She also runs a research lab
where she conducts clinical trials as chief investigator
and serves other institutions in various capacities,
including Columbia University Medical School.
Her credentials and accolades are many too lengthy
to list here, but suffice it to say that she's super legit
as is her vital due book titled High Functioning,
which if you relate at all to any of the things
that I've just shared,
I strongly suggest you immediately pick it up.
So if you are a high achiever
or perhaps you know somebody who is,
I think this one is for you as Judith does
quite an amazing job of dissecting this idea of high functioning
and putting it to the test.
Judith, welcome.
Thank you for having me.
I'm delighted to have you here today.
Your work and your book is speaking to me
in a very profound way at a very particular moment
in my life.
And I feel like the universe must have conspired
to arrange this meeting for a very good reason
at this exact specific time.
Because I am experiencing currently a version
of the condition that you talk about in this book.
I would say that I'm somebody who gets high on high function
and it's proving to be an urge
that is of diminishing returns right now.
So I'm in a situation where I'm struggling to sleep.
I'm waking up in the middle of the night
and then I'll come in here at a ridiculous hour.
I'm working on a book.
I've got all these podcasts.
I have back surgery in two weeks.
So I have to get all these things done
and I'm not gonna let anything get in the way of that.
And so if there's one thing I can do,
it's focus, execute, be productive.
And this has been my modus operandi
for as long as I can remember, right?
It's a superpower, but it's also an Achilles heel.
And I'm at a particular inflection point with it today.
I literally woke up at like 1.30 in the morning
and started like cycling through all these things
that I have to do and ratcheting up my anxiety.
And I was like, oh, this is perfect.
Well, it's terrible in that I wish I had slept more
for this interview, but actually,
kind of amazing that you're here today
to talk about this subject matter
that is I think vitally important.
Well, I truly believe in destiny and I believe in faith.
And I'm a scientist and I own a lab, but my dad's a pastor.
And for many years, I thought you couldn't believe
in the things that you couldn't prove, right?
Because if you're a scientist, then you're a scientist
and you shouldn't have that conflict.
Science is science, numbers are numbers.
But I have been learning over the past couple of years
that there are circumstances that bring people together.
And it is, part of it is spiritual.
And another part of it is, I think,
I really believe in destiny.
And I think that I came here for you at this point in time
because you needed this message.
Well, I believe in that as well.
I'm on the same, I'm vibrating on that frequency.
I have another frequency that's a little off kilter
at the moment.
So why don't we unpack this a little bit.
On its face, like this idea of being high functioning
while it also being this version of depression,
these are antithetical ideas.
Like, isn't somebody who is high functioning
somebody you should aspire to become,
like to be productive, to get out there and crush it.
These are all like goals that we all inspire
to better inhabit ourselves.
So explain this interesting kind of phenomenon
and or not phenomenon, like diagnosis that is central
to the work that you're now doing.
Well, it's interesting because as you're talking
about this upcoming surgery that you have,
it put me right back in time when I was about to give birth
to my first and only child.
And I own a lab, I have a private practice,
I was a professor at NYU teaching doctors,
all of these wonderful things happening.
But probably the most important thing
that could ever happen to me becoming
a mother was a thing that I was like kind of dreading. And so leading up to giving birth,
I was doing so much work and I couldn't sit still and I was so busy. And some people would
say that's nesting, but I wasn't nesting in the way most mothers nested. I was taking
care of my research, trying to line things up so that, you know, if I had to be, God
forbid, out of commission for a week, things would line things up so that if I had to be, God forbid,
out of commission for a week, things would run smoothly.
I remember having this baby on my chest and having to nurse.
And then I had all these lab charts around me.
I'm like, what was I thinking?
But I do think many of us who are busy,
who have our identity and our self-worth
so closely tied to this role, we cannot
sit still. And it's different than burnout. You know, with burnout, by
definition, it's an occupational hazard. So if you take the person out of the
workplace, they should technically get better. Not with people like us, you know.
You take us out of work, we will still find more work. We will still find
another project.
We know that we have to slow down in two or three weeks,
but we just can't accept it.
So we wake up in the middle of the night,
you know, we're up doing things, working on things.
There's no end to it.
We cannot sit still.
When we sit still, we feel empty.
When we're not busy, we feel restless.
And that's what I was finding
with high-functioning depression.
We don't check that bottom box like most others with depression
who has all the symptoms of depression.
We don't check that bottom box of are you low functioning
or have you stopped functioning or are you in crisis?
It's the opposite.
We cope by busying ourselves.
We try to outrun our problems.
We try to outrun our trauma and our pain.
We cannot sit still.
So you have this quiz in the book,
and I got almost a perfect score on this,
in which you basically ask these questions
to try to help self-diagnose people
as to whether they're suffering from this.
Can you just walk us through the day in a life
of somebody who might be a candidate for this
so that people can orient themselves
and relate their own behavior patterns
to what you're talking about?
Yeah, it's interesting because my office
is in a very busy part of Manhattan.
So I see a lot of people coming in
and they're not coming in with the typical breakdowns.
They're coming in with something called anhedonia. And it is
a lack of pleasure and interest in things that used to light you up. And it's not a
crisis, right? If you go to a doctor and you're like, oh, I don't have joy, they're going
to say, well, are you working? Are you showing up for others? Are you still able to function?
And if you say yes, they'll say, well, come back when you break down.
But anhedonia, I think, is a crisis.
It's a lack of joy, which is a crisis for human beings
because human beings were built with the DNA for joy.
This is our birthright.
But many of us are walking around with the meh, the bleh.
So anhedonia is one of the key signs.
It's the first sign that I ask about.
But the other things are, you know, when you do sit still, do you feel restless?
Is it hard for you to just be alone with yourself?
You know, and I think that's important because we don't realize that this is a part of our
fight or flight.
This is our trauma response.
We cannot just be.
We have to do.
And I joke, I say you're a human doing, not a human being,
because you're trying to outrun something
that you haven't fully resolved.
For many of us, it's something early in childhood,
but for others, there's something that happened
in adulthood that is so painful that we just avoid it.
And avoiding the pain, avoiding the trauma
is a form of busyness.
So when you think of combat veterans,
I do a lot of research with PTSD,
post-traumatic stress disorder.
Many of them will avoid a place that triggers them
or they'll avoid a person that triggers them.
For those of us with high function depression,
we are avoiding our pain by working,
by pushing it down, pushing it down.
But what happens is that you push it down so much
that you stop feeling.
And that's where the anhedonia comes in,
the lack of pleasure and joy.
So anhedonia, trauma, we're gonna get into that,
big traumas, small traumas.
But I think just on a top level,
just the idea that this would be categorized
under depression as opposed to an anxiety disorder
is the leap that is challenging for me.
Like I wouldn't consider myself depressed
by any stretch of how I think about that.
I certainly have spells of high anxiety
or I'm always revving
and I definitely suffer from anhedonia.
Like it's, I remember saying to somebody recently,
like, I mean, I have an incredible life.
Like it's beyond anything I could have imagined for myself.
And I've worked very hard for it.
And some of those impulses that led me here were healthy
and some were not, but joy and being present in it
and actually feeling gratitude for it
are very elusive things for me.
And there are things that I will then sort of push
to the side and say, well, that's okay,
because I'm on a mission and those things
are less important than kind of moving forward
and doing this thing that I do,
then on some level is an act of service,
but I also rationalize it as such, like it's for me too.
Like it nourishes me and it's meaningful for other people.
And that's great, but it's almost as if joy, happiness,
those things are secondary, you know,
or they're just lower on the hierarchy of priorities
and something I can get to later,
which is super ironic because I sit across from people
all the time talking about happiness.
Like it's like, you know,
self-awareness will avail you nothing.
Like I'm briefed on everything
and yet I struggle to actually put some of those tools
into practice to move my life towards these things
that I want more of.
And it reminds me of something that's often said
in recovery, like I'm a 12 step person.
It's like, well, the brain that created the problem
struggles to solve it.
Like you're relying on the brain
that created the problem to solve it.
And when you're in this state of anhedonia
or high functioning depression, as you call it,
which I clearly feel like I have on some level,
that's a situation in which you don't really wanna solve it.
Like you can read the book,
but then it becomes very difficult to actually
like break out of it through action.
Because you're getting rewarded by the system, you know?
The more productive you are, the more you give,
the more rewards you get, the feedback,
or you're doing a great job externally,
but something inside does not feel satisfied.
And that's why you continue to go.
I'm glad you brought up anxiety because in depression research, when we're adding up
how we know whether or not you're getting better, worse, or staying the same, we're
literally adding up points.
And one of the points that I think many people don't know that we add up is the point of
stress, the point of relaxation, the point of tension.
So one of the questions I'll ask that's on that questionnaire is, are you able to self-soothe?
Are you able to relax when you're anxious, when you're tense?
And you would think, isn't that anxiety?
Why are you talking about tension with relation to depression?
But let me ask you something.
Do you think it's even possible to be joyful if you're anxious,
if you're worried all the time, if you're tense?
No. Tense people don't enjoy even the simple pleasures in life.
That's why when talking about depression, we have to incorporate anxiety.
And it's interesting because it used to be thought that with depression research,
it was just three chemicals, dopamine, norepinephrine, serotonin.
But now we're learning about other chemicals
in the brain that are important.
Look at the glutamate model and the GABA model.
GABA is one of those really important neurotransmitters
that calms your brain.
So you would think, well, why are we
talking about calming in depression?
Because it's really hard to be joyful and to access the things
in life that bring you pleasure when you're tense.
So we have to talk about anxiety and depression together.
And you know how I mentioned that in my research, I found a high correlation between trauma
and pain and high functioning depression.
Well, if you're constantly revved up, one of the questions
in my questionnaire is the psychomotor agitation, that's the restlessness. Then how can you
even sit still to enjoy a basic meal? You're just in default mode. You're thinking, you're
worrying, you're not even staying present. And that's why when we travel to other countries
and we see these thought leaders, these gurus, they just seem so joyful because they're so peaceful.
It is really difficult to find joy,
to access joy when you're not at peace.
The AA version of that is sobriety
is being happy, joyous and free.
And the kind of dry drunk is restless,
irritable and discontent.
Well, there's a lot of anedonia in chemical dependency,
a lot of it, because people think that,
oh, you just wanna get dependent on something
because it gives you joy.
It's the opposite.
Once you're at a point where your brain is dependent
on a substance, the lack of that substance
makes you so irritable and feel so unpleasant
physiologically that it's not even about accessing joy anymore, you just wanna get rid of that substance makes you so irritable and feel so unpleasant physiologically that it's not even about accessing joy anymore.
You just wanna get rid of that pain.
And that's why I think a lot of people
don't really understand what happens
with someone who's struggling with addictions.
They see it as like, oh, you're just a heathen.
You're just heathenistic.
You just want pleasure.
No, they're trying to get rid of that pain.
Sure, and when you remove the substance
and aren't utilizing the tools,
you have the emotional pain that is still there, right?
Needing to be addressed.
I mean, that's like the real work.
And in terms of that anhedonia piece,
like it's more than just a lack of being able to feel joy.
It's also just a general kind of numbness
to all experiences.
Yeah, it's a coping mechanism.
I think for many of us,
we avoid dealing with these feelings in general.
And it could be cultural,
it could be something we're taught,
but it also could be something
that was defense mechanism in childhood,
that if we didn't feel, we walled it off,
then we'd be safe.
And initially that's helpful,
but over time it robs us of our birthright of joy.
And it sounds so granolary,
but we have to start feeling again.
We have to start processing and stop out running
so that we can feel all of those emotions
because that's when the healing begins.
And that's when we can actually start to access the joy.
Let's talk about the trauma piece.
Let's parse this out between the big traumas
and the little T traumas.
So in PTSD research,
there's an assessment called the CAPS-5
and many people probably heard about it during
the Johnny Depp Amber Heard trial because one of the clinicians pulled it out and wanted
to measure whether or not any of the individuals in the case had real trauma.
But it's a very powerful gold standard tool that's used in psychiatry research.
And it was developed out of the Veterans Hospital
to look at whether or not combat veterans
had a certain level of trauma.
And so some of the criteria for trauma with PTSD,
you have to meet criteria based on it being life threatening
or something physically painful happening to you
or to someone that you witnessed this happening
to someone else. So the traumas have to be major,
like an assault or near death.
However, what I was saying since 2020,
people come into my office saying, you know,
I lost my business or I went through a divorce
and they want it to be in these PTSD studies
because they were experiencing that fight or flight.
But I had to tell them like, you don't meet criteria.
Do you know how disheartening that is for people
and validating it is?
So I have to tell them,
your trauma does not meet textbook criteria.
But off the record, I'd say, I believe you,
because trauma is anything that is so emotionally significant
and psychologically significant
that it shapes
the way that you view yourself and the way that you interact with the world.
And I say that because one of the most common trauma responses that I see is internalizing
self blame, shame and guilt.
That's important.
You know, it's not as, you know, sexy or flamboyant as a nightmare or a flashback.
But it's really important because if you have unresolved
trauma and you don't feel worthy without doing for others
or having a role or showing up even when you're in pain,
then you continued busying yourself.
You never process that pain.
You cope by just showing up and being the rock.
And many people in positions like yours, you know, the thought leaders, the entrepreneurs,
the fathers, that's how they cope. They don't ever process those wounds. They continue busying
themselves because there's this inner self-worth that isn't there, that they believe unworthy because they believe that they're somehow at fault
for what happened to them.
They feel shame if they talk about it.
They don't wanna burden others.
So they just keep doing, they keep busying themselves
and they don't ever process it.
And so I think that it sounds like, you know,
very, I think emotional for some people, you know, who are not accustomed
to facing their problems,
but it's important to acknowledge this.
This is how you start to change.
If you don't acknowledge it, if you don't validate it,
it's very difficult to start changing.
What you resist persists, you know, and actually grows.
I think it was Carl Jung who said that.
Under that umbrella of trauma,
like if you define it broadly enough,
it seems as if everybody would fall under that category.
I mean, it's like, we've all had stuff that's happened, right?
And some people have had to weather and suffer through,
enormous traumatic experiences,
others mild emotional experiences,
but I suppose it's about how our brain processes it, right?
And whether we, you know, move towards it
and try to work through it
or whether we compartmentalize it
and try to, you know, consistently outpace it.
Well, we've all had painful things happen to us,
but some of them didn't necessarily shape the way
that we view ourselves.
Some of us will say, oh yeah, my grandma died, it was sad,
but it didn't significantly alter the way
that we view ourselves and the way that we see ourselves
in the world.
But for others, we are different.
These instances do shape us.
Like divorce is a trauma that many people experience,
but they don't talk about it.
Why? Because of the shame.
People think that somehow they were at blame
and they may have been at blame,
but others, it just happens.
It's something that happens in relationships.
Relationships fall apart.
For me personally, when I was going through a divorce,
there was a lot of that guilt and shame.
Even though on a conscious level, I'm a psychiatrist.
I know that this happens, people grow apart,
but on a deeper level, I felt, well,
there should have been something I could have done
or maybe I did something wrong.
We all experienced this,
but because I have tools
to acknowledge it, I know how to work my way back
and say, okay, this is something I have to challenge
as a core negative belief that I have to challenge.
But many people, they don't have that.
They don't even have the acknowledgement
that this is something that can happen
due to a trauma that people don't even acknowledge
because they say everybody goes through that, right?
Something that is a common trauma that people don't even acknowledge because they say everybody goes through that, right? Something that is a common trauma
that people don't acknowledge is birth trauma.
You know, like we'll say that many mothers,
you know, they have typical births,
but some have very painful births
where they don't want to talk about it
because every mother gives birth.
It's something all mothers do.
Why are you complaining about it?
But for some, it was very painful.
It was very traumatizing.
They could have lost their lives, but they don't talk about it because that's what mothers
do.
You know, there are these things that happen to us as human beings that we just believe
that, okay, many humans go through this, so it's okay.
Why are we trying to call it a trauma?
But for so many of the people I've worked with,
these instances have shaped the way that they behave,
the way that they view themselves
and the way that they interact in the world.
So it needs to be acknowledged.
And only when we acknowledge it and validate it,
can we work our way back to see how it impacts
the way that their relationships are,
the way that they work in the workplace,
the way that they interact with their children.
And these are all areas where they're losing their joy
because they haven't even acknowledged
how these traumas have impacted them.
The word trauma is such a loaded word though.
I almost feel as if we might be better off
if there was something else in the nomenclature
because when you say trauma, it's like,
it wasn't a trauma, like, yeah, it was bad.
And like, I had to get through this,
but like, you know, this is a common experience
that many people have to your point.
But because the word trauma gets associated with it,
it's like, yeah, no, I'm not gonna,
we're not doing that, right?
Like, I'm cool.
Yeah, it's like the word trigger.
It bros people the wrong way.
The trauma trigger is a triggering word. Because it's been overused. But I do think that, you know, for some, these painful instances are not traumas for them.
It doesn't lead to this response.
And in others it does.
And it's validating to name that for the person because what it tells them is that this thing
happened to them.
It wasn't their fault.
It impacted you in ways that you were not even aware of.
And that's why you were coping in ways that you probably wouldn't have if you had known
better, right?
If you've known a different way of coping.
And this is why you can't access joy.
And I think that's powerful for some individuals because that allows them to take that shame
and guilt off of themselves so that they can actually start to change. And I think that's powerful for some individuals because that allows them to take that shame
and guilt off of themselves
so that they can actually start to change.
So let's go back to this idea of the day in the life,
like walk me through,
like if somebody is suffering from this,
how are they waking up in the morning
and making decisions throughout their day?
Well, everyone's different.
But what I find with my high functioning folks
is that they do have a lot of anxious energy.
So they end up waking up before their alarm.
They don't have a sense of self-worth, so they don't nourish their bodies or take the
time to eat properly.
So a lot of them are just eating unhealthy foods or not eating at all.
They're revved up on caffeine, drinking a lot of coffee so that they can keep doing
because that's what's important to them.
Or when they do decide to have a meal, they're sitting at their desk, they're working, they're
not actually savoring their food, they're just kind of, you know, cramming it in their
face and they're ending up with acid reflux.
They're not going to the bathroom during the day because they invalidate their basic needs.
So they come home and they have to go straight to the restroom. They're with their kids and they're not present
because their mind is still at work.
They can't slow down or their mind is thinking
about something else.
So they're leaving the basic joys of connection, right?
This family that they have,
they're leaving that joy on the table
because they're not even looking at their child.
Their mind is somewhere else.
And then when it's time to go to bed, they're thinking about what they have to do the next
day so it's hard for them to relax.
So what do they do?
They doom scroll because that's their way of controlling the outcome.
Let me just keep looking at all this news and maybe if I keep looking at it, something
will change.
Well, we know the news won't change.
It's always going to be there and it's always going to be bad news.
And then the day starts again.
And they're leaving out the points of joy.
The simple things such as your dog is at your leg during dinner
and trying to get your attention,
you're ignoring that dog because you're not present.
Your loved one just wants you to notice them, but you're not.
You are taking them for granted.
Your food, which you used to enjoy,
it doesn't give you the same pleasure
because you're so busy thinking about other things.
You're not even engaging in, oh, this tastes really good.
Like, I like that flavor, you know?
You're not being present.
And, you know, I said that a lot of other countries
will have gurus and monks who seem so peaceful and joyful.
Well, that's it.
You're not at peace.
So you can't even sit still to access things
such as a meal, you know, enjoying and savoring a meal.
Or if you have access to nature, you're not looking outside.
You're looking at your phone or you're looking at your work
or you're focusing on something else.
You're leaving the basic joy on the table.
What is the difference between somebody
who is suffering from high functioning depression
and somebody who just by dint of their circumstances
and environment simply has a very challenging life.
Like if you are economically, you're a single mom,
you've got two jobs and you gotta take the bus
and you're on food stamps.
I mean, it's like, it's environmental also,
like approaching it from a holistic perspective,
there are many vectors and variables at play.
Certainly it could be a trauma response
and then symptomatically you have anhedonia
and these other kinds of outward manifestations of it.
But is there a qualitative difference
between somebody who is just doing the best they can
and this more, you know,
striver driven runner and gunner?
Yeah, you know, I love that question because in my lab,
I see people who are very, very
wealthy and people who don't have very much.
And in research, especially the line of work that I do with novel medications, depression
does not discriminate.
It doesn't care whether or not you are rich or you have nothing.
And there's a model that I think that is very helpful to understand, you know, because there
are many ways that you can be robbed of joy.
It's a simple model.
It's called the biopsychosocial model.
And every medical student knows about it.
So biologically, what are the things that get in the way of your joy?
So what are your medical conditions?
For me, I have a low thyroid.
And so if I don't check my thyroid,
I have to be very careful about feeling anxious or depressed.
But for others, it could be something else.
It could be they have really bad asthma
or they have an autoimmune condition,
they have chronic back pain.
Psychologically, what's happening in terms of their past.
So do they have attachment styles
that are not helping them to have healthy
relationships? Do they have unprocessed past traumas, you know, or ADHD or other conditions?
And then socially, what is their life like? So what you're talking about with the woman who
is a single mom who works hard, who doesn't have resources, she's going to have a lot of social
stressors that are different than someone, let's say, who's upper middle class. You know, she's going to have a lot of social stressors that are different than someone, let's say, who's upper middle class. She's worrying about finances. She probably is dealing with some
aggressions in the workplace. She's worrying about her kids. She probably doesn't have the support.
She probably doesn't have access to foods that are not processed or access to nature
or has the ability to move around and get activity, right? Those are all the things in the social context.
And we also know that people from lower socioeconomic
brackets, they have other things to do.
Their environments may not be clean.
They may have toxins in the environment.
So those are all areas where absolutely they
make major contributions to whether or not you
have depression or anxiety.
But what I found interesting is that even when
I travel to countries where people don't even have running
water, people are in dire straits of poverty,
you can still find joy.
You still see people laughing, dancing, communing.
So it's not all about what you have.
And when I talk about joy,
I talk about these moments of pleasure.
So when you're sitting still and you put your feet up,
do you feel rested?
When you're hungry and you eat, does it satisfy you?
These are these moments of joy.
These are the experiences of joy versus the idea, which you know of,
of happiness, right? When I finally pay off my debt, I'll be happy. When I finally find
a partner that I love, I'll be happy. When I finally have, you know, this clout that
I desire, I'll be happy. That's the difference. So you can still access those moments of joy
that give you hope versus this idea of finally
being happy.
So when you think of that single mom, because I've worked with many of them, some of them
have severe mental illness like schizophrenia, but you'll still see them connecting with
their kid.
You know, like one of the stories I tell often is working in the clinics, I'd work with these
moms who had severe mental health issues.
And some of the workers in the hospital
would say, well, let's not offer this program to them,
because it's a lot of paperwork.
And they may not be able to do it,
and we're just going to overwhelm them.
And I would say, don't underestimate a mother who
comes from nothing, who's not well educated,
who has a severe mental health issue,
because she's still raising her kids,
she's still bringing them to school every day,
she's still bringing them to her appointments,
don't underestimate her.
So even if you have these challenges,
you can still access that joy.
It is a mindset, it's a mind shift, you know,
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The high functioning person generally in my experience
has a pretty powerful motor.
Like they have this drive, you know,
they're trying to make their imprint on the world
for better or worse, right?
And trauma may be the kind of cause of why they are that way
or at least in a related way.
But the fuel for that drive is essentially fear
of one form or another.
And that fear is linked obviously to the trauma
or to some other root cause or source,
but it is a fear response, right?
This fear could be, if I don't do it,
like everything's gonna fall apart
or my identity is so wrapped up in what I do.
And if I don't show up for it, then who am I?
I'm scared of, you know,
how other people will perceive me.
In treating people who suffer from this,
I suspect you have to identify the locus of that fear
and try to deconstruct it.
Yeah, I do.
And you're absolutely right.
That fear is what we would call anxiety, right?
Fear of the not being loved,
fear of the running out of money.
fear of the not being loved, fear of the running out of money. You know, from me, I have done this deep dive into my own past because I came to this country
with very little and from the Caribbean.
And I didn't even realize how this chasing accolades, you know, not just having one lab,
but three labs,
having all these roles was tied to this fear
of running out of resources.
On a conscious level, I knew,
okay, there's no, I'm gonna run out.
The money's in the bank, I'm good.
But the inner restlessness came from
this unprocessed fear of running out.
And many people, they may not have come
from the similar background that I have,
but the generations before them,
that could have been passed down.
You know, let's say if your grandparents came
from a war-torn country,
where they were oppressed and they came here,
and they lived in ways that, you know,
you're not supposed to take risks,
you're supposed to hoard, you know, don't waste food.
Some of your behaviors are out of this scarcity trauma
that was never processed.
And that's why it is important to sit still
and to trace yourself back to that moment.
It could have been in your past, in your family history.
It could have been in your personal history,
but it's important to sit down and reflect on it.
It's validating. If you take your foot off the gas, it's important to sit down and reflect on it. It's validating.
If you take your foot off the gas,
it's all gonna collapse, right?
Like it's all gonna go away,
whether that's an imposter syndrome thing
or a scarcity mindset or trauma.
Unless I'm there doing it all the time,
it's all gonna break down,
which is a fear response.
It's also, there's a layer of narcissism on top of that.
It's as if like, I'm so powerful.
I'm so afraid of being not in control,
but I'm also all powerful and I will be able to solve it.
And beneath that is a discomfort with uncertainty
because this scarcity mindset is really a discomfort
with not knowing what's gonna happen.
And so what can I control?
Well, I can control my output and my work
and that will solve it.
But of course, the world is uncertain
and no amount of work or effort
is going to allow you to transcend that.
I love that you said narcissism
because one of my professors in training at Columbia
once told us to look out for people who have the,
they're like the flip coin.
One side is narcissism and the other side is masochism.
And narcissists, you know, what we think of narcissists,
we think of people who are full of themselves,
who lack empathy, who are prideful and boastful.
But we don't think about the masochistic narcissist
who bends over backwards, is constantly working,
is delaying pleasure because they believe
that they're the only ones who can do it, right?
Only they could do it right.
And I think many people with high function depression
have these narcissistic, masochistic tendencies.
And it's not because they're a bad person,
it's just because they didn't process that pain.
And what they end up doing
is finding their self-worth in that role.
So it looks very narcissistic,
I'm the only one who could do it,
but it is masochistic
because they're bending over backwards.
But it's self-validating also.
And then you look at the world through that lens,
like, see, when I did it, it worked.
And when you didn't, it didn't work.
It's constantly being reinforced that way.
But they're not happy.
They're leaving joy on the table.
They are miserable.
I wanna talk more about the masochism piece
because I watched and listened to a bunch of your interviews
and there's a lot of talk about the anhedonia
and the trauma stuff,
but less so when it comes to the masochism piece.
And that's another kind of loaded word, right?
But I think it's super interesting.
And because at least to me,
it seems like this is a less discussed pillar in this,
that we could take the opportunity
to kind of dig a little bit deeper into that.
Well, the reason I don't talk about masochism
is because the algorithm will block you.
Oh, really?
The algorithm thinks that you're talking about sex.
So, and I teach media at NYU.
So like, I know that. That's interesting. I hadn't even thought about that. Well, and I teach media at NYU. So like, I know that.
That's interesting. I hadn't even thought about that.
Well, if you look at, I mean, for someone who does so much high functioning depression
content, it's hard to find me under high functioning depression because I have to like change the
S to like a dollar sign because the algorithm will block the word depression. It'll block
the word anxiety, you know, things like that. So I have to be creative to get the word out
about this stuff. I have to like disguise it.
But masochism is one of those words
that most people think of like sex,
but there's actually masochistic personality disorder
that was in the DSM, the Bible of psychiatry for years.
And then around the eighties or nineties was taken out
because it was thought to be victim blaming.
And so typically masochistic people would be people who somehow incited others to treat
them poorly, right?
It does sound victim blaming or, you know, and additional to that, they don't believe
that they're worthy of praise.
They don't believe that they're worthy of pleasure.
They bend over backwards from people, even though those people are takers.
And so the more modern version of masochism
is people pleasing, a little different than being a martyr
because martyrs kind of wear that as a badge.
People pleasers are usually miserable, but they can't stop.
But the masochistic tendencies that we see
with high functioning depression rob people of joy.
They end up doing so much. They end up believing wholeheartedly
that if they don't do, they're not lovable. If they don't say yes, they'll be rejected
or abandoned. And so they don't know how to stop. They're not realizing that if they do
say no, if they do set boundaries, people will actually love them more. So I felt that it had to be in there.
No, I think it's important.
The idea that you have to not necessarily be a martyr,
but you are kind of wearing a hair shirt
and flogging yourself,
but there's also that narcissistic piece.
Like it is doing something for you, right?
You have to recognize that all of these errant behavior
patterns are serving you in a certain way.
And when you combine that with that conditional love piece,
like my value is only in so far as I can go out
into the world and bring home the bacon
or achieve this thing, right?
You're on this happy trail with that
and you're gonna perpetuate that
even as your experience of anhedinia is going to increase
and then it becomes difficult to get off of it
because you have been that person who said,
I'm the only one who can do it.
And so everybody said, well, okay.
And then you're kind of left with yourself, right?
And you're in this lonely isolated place as a consequence.
Yeah, the takers will continue to take.
They will take as long as you're giving.
It's human nature.
It doesn't mean that the people in your life are bad,
but we learn, you know?
I said that trauma shapes the way that you see yourself
and the way you interact in the world.
Well, if you're gonna keep giving
because you believe that that's the only way you're valuable,
then people will continue to take.
And then you will end up feeling depleted and without joy.
You don't set boundaries with others,
but also with yourself, right?
Yeah, that's not a great situation to be in, is it?
It's not.
The great thing about it is that when you start realizing it,
you start to change.
I remember when my very first therapist said to me,
Judith, what you have is contagious.
And I was like, what are you talking about?
And this is from someone who resisted therapy,
because I came from a very Caribbean religious background.
I didn't think I needed therapy.
I was like, that's for people
who have severe mental health issues.
But training at Columbia,
they offered us free therapy
with some of the greatest psychiatrists in the world.
And I remember my first therapist saying to me,
what you have is contagious because it's masochism.
You don't believe that you're worthy enough
to do this very special type of therapy
where you're getting these resources
at a very small amount of money.
You don't think you're worthy,
so you're coming late to all your appointments.
But what you're doing is you're making me late
for the next guy, you know,
the guy who's waiting in the waiting area.
It spreads.
There's a selfishness to it.
There is, and it is contagious.
This unhappiness, this masochism, it spreads.
And there have been bouts in my life
when I've looked around,
when I was going through my masochistic tendencies
and everyone in the lab, they were overworked too.
When I'm busy, when I'm masochistic, my team is.
But when I slow down and I start to tap into joy,
they start to be joyful too.
So just to put a finer point on it,
how is this masochism root
or why is it so important to really understand
in terms of overcoming this disorder?
Just acknowledging it and being aware of it
allows you to change.
There's something called affect labeling in psychology.
If you acknowledge the issue, if you acknowledge the feeling or the experience, then that decreases
uncertainty and it allows you to create change. So I often liken it to, let's say you're in this very dark room
and you can't see and you hear a loud crash.
Some of us would start running,
some of us start swinging,
some of us would start screaming.
But if you turn the light on and you saw that,
oh, it was a vase that broke,
then you're more at ease.
Knowing what you're working with,
knowing that, okay, I tend to be a masochistic
people pleaser, that explains so much for many people.
And knowing that it's related to unresolved trauma
or low self-worth, that decreases the uncertainty
for the human brain.
Right, if you are able to identify the behavior,
then that becomes a window into perhaps the trauma
that gave rise to it in the first place.
And it just allows you to feel that there are things
that are more certain.
Uncertainty is not great for the human brain.
Look at 2020, none of us knew what was gonna happen.
And many of us became depressed and anxious.
When we don't know what we're working with,
we are tense, we are anxious, we make terrible decisions. When we know what we're working with, we are tense, we are anxious, we make terrible decisions.
When we know what we're working with,
when we know why we are the way we are,
we're able to make better decisions
and we are less stressed.
How long did it take you to recognize this within yourself?
Like, I'm just imagining, you know,
the young version of you coming from the family of origin that you did
and your background and circumstances to be this,
a student, top of the class, Columbia,
like you're the classic striver, right?
And your upward mobility is skyward.
So at some point, what was the inflection point
or the crisis or what kind of intervene to make you more reflective
about this in your own life?
Well, there are many of those times,
but there was one that really, I think,
created a change and a shift for me.
It was, I was at my desk in 2020,
and I was given this talk to this large hospital system, and they were frantic.
Some of the questions coming through were like, you know, am I going to even survive?
Like how do I get through this?
I'm seeing so much death, and I was supposed to be the healing voice.
And halfway through the talk, I was just like, I think I am depressed.
Like, it just hit me.
And it wasn't the first time I've been depressed
because I couldn't go back in my life
and see these moments where I just wasn't even acknowledging it.
I was high functioning AF, you know?
But that moment I was like, wow, like I just felt,
I felt like so much anhedonia.
And I was like, what am I doing here?
You know, I'm helping this hospital system,
but my lab is still going, you know,
it's full throttle.
We can't shut down these FDA monitored studies.
The city is quiet, it looked like, you know, a zombie land.
And here I am, this young mother at the time still married and having to stick to this
role of leader, this voice of reason, you know, this heal, when I'm unhealed.
So that is a moment in time, where I just thought,
wow, if I'm like this, how many people are like this?
There's gotta be someone else like this.
And there've been times after that where I find myself
experiencing anhedonia and being masochistic.
But now that I know what this is, I tell myself,
I just got to do more of the things that I really love.
I need to go back to the basics.
I have to understand the science of my happiness,
because the science of my happiness
is going to be different than yours.
For me, I know that points of joy that really make me
feel spiritually full and fed have
to do with being close to my family, being able to see my daughter frequently and not overworking, being connected
to my team.
So I know now that when I'm feeling masochistic and anodotic, I just got to be more connected.
But it could be different for you, right?
You're going to be different than me.
The science of your happiness is different than mine.
And that's why I want this information available
in my book.
I want people to understand that there's only one you
and there will only ever be one you.
So understand the science of your happiness.
What are the things that are taking away
from your points of joy?
And when you understand that,
then when you're feeling this anhedonia
and you're feeling this masochism,
you know where to add those points back
because you finally understand you.
There's a boldness to taking action on this
that I would imagine is not always well-received.
Like if you're in the medical profession,
I have stories about this from being a lawyer
or you come from a family that has
established certain expectations around like how you behave,
and suddenly you decide you're gonna do something different,
that's not necessarily gonna be well-received
at your place of work or at home, right?
And so it takes a lot of courage, I think,
to take a stand for yourself and say,
I'm not gonna be this people pleaser anymore,
and I'm gonna set my own trajectory.
That's gonna be a little bit different.
You're gonna ruffle some feathers.
I know like this has happened with my family,
but also I'm remembering being a corporate lawyer.
And there was one weekend where I was working on a Sunday
and a partner came in and he had just come from his wife having given birth.
Like he literally left the hospital
and went to go finish a brief, right?
And you're in this environment
that's reinforcing that behavior.
So to your point of contagion,
like there's an expectation and a sort of pridefulness
around this behavior.
And if you're to say, yeah, I'm not gonna do that anymore.
They're like, hold on, you know,
no, this is how we do things here.
You're going against the grain.
Lawyers, medicine, it's very similar
that you're in the trenches kind of culture, you know,
like what makes you so special that you get to slow down,
you know, and I used to be an anesthesiologist
before I was a psychiatrist.
And I had to leave that field because, wow, I was a psychiatrist and I had to leave that
field because, wow, like talk about trauma and unprocessed trauma.
There's a lot of that in medicine.
I remember one of my first months as an intern and giving chest compressions to someone who
ultimately passed.
And then there was no like, oh, let's sit and talk about this.
It was like, well, who's got the next shift?
There's just so much of this culture of like, man up.
You know, like, this is part of the job, get over it.
So the healers are really unhealed.
And I see this in fields like lawyers, attorneys,
the legal fields, you get shamed if you show feelings,
come on, talk about unprocessed trauma.
I think it's important to talk about these things now,
not to say that everyone should just stop what they're doing
and stop working.
People with high functioning depression have something called
all or nothing thinking.
When we hear, you gotta slow down, we think, I can't stop.
Slowing down is not the same as stopping.
We automatically go to, well, people need me.
No, I'm not saying to stop everything. You know, slowing down can just look like, well, people need me. No, I'm not saying to stop everything.
Slowing down can just look like, okay, during lunch today
for one day of the week,
I'm going to make an intentional decision
to close my screen and eat my lunch
and like take the time to chew it and notice the flavors
and enjoy it, like have pleasure in a basic thing.
That's what slowing down looks like.
It doesn't mean that you're gonna miss the board meeting
because you're sitting there eating your salad.
It means you're gonna treat yourself like a human being.
How is HFD different, maybe it's not,
from what Arthur Brooks talks about, the strivers dilemma.
Have you heard this?
So this is basically like you can't get off
the treadmill, you know, like the happiness and the joy
and all these things that you're seeking,
whether unconsciously or consciously
are always on the other, right around the bend
on the other side of like the next promotion or, you know,
accolade.
Well, that's different because the strivers dilemma
is someone who delays happiness, right?
They're saying that they still have to do this one thing,
and then it's not enough.
They get the one thing done.
They continue going.
It's not enough.
And they're constantly on the go, right?
High functioning depression, you know,
when you look at depression and criteria,
there are specific chess checklists
in there.
There are symptoms like poor sleep, you can't focus, low energy, feeling shame and guilt,
anhedonia.
But then you're different than people with the clinical depression because you're actually
overdoing, you're not stopping functioning, right?
That's very different.
And then the striver's dilemma,
maybe he does talk a bit about the lack of joy
at the anhedonia, but for those with high functioning
depression, they have the symptoms of depression,
but they're not stopping, they're overdoing.
How has all this discourse in the book
and your work in this area been received by your peers?
Wow, I get so many doctors coming up to me saying,
thank you for doing this, this is me.
I would never say that I had this, but it's me.
On the flip side, I get people saying,
well, clinical depression is more important.
And it's not a competition,
there's enough depression for everybody, right?
I think what people wanna focus on,
specifically in psychiatry, is people who have broken down.
And you know what?
They do deserve support, right?
People in crisis deserve support.
But my whole philosophy is why are we waiting for people to break down?
You know, we're seeing this boom in longevity where people are saying, don't wait for the
cancer to spread.
Like let's teach people how to identify the signs
and avoid the risks.
And with a menopause, you're seeing,
don't wait for the osteoporosis and the heart disease,
let's try to prevent it.
In psychiatry, we're in the dark ages.
We're still saying, well, let's wait for that box
of let's break down and then-
When you can't get out of bed, call me.
Yeah, I mean, there's a prophylactic,
sort of preventative angle to all of this.
But I also know there's people out there who think
you're minimizing depression
by characterizing it in this way.
Well, you know what?
I'm saying that two things can be true.
Why do we wait?
Why are we waiting for people to be in crisis,
to break
down? Let's teach people the tools that we learn in medical school. Let's teach them
about the biopsychosocial model. Let's teach them about trauma, even if it's not like major
traumas. Let's teach them about how they cope negatively by pushing down these emotions
rather than processing them. Because if we don't, we are just not going to have the mental health professionals to
deal with what we're seeing now.
And look at 2020.
They were asking out of work psychiatrists to come back into the field.
Why?
We just didn't have enough.
We didn't have enough professionals to address the crisis.
We still don't have enough.
If you go to most major cities, you'll
still be on a wait list to see a psychiatrist for six
to eight weeks.
In other rural areas, there's one psychiatrist
for every 30,000 folks.
We're not being proactive.
We're being reactive.
This is a proactive approach, giving people the tools,
letting them recognize the symptoms
and the signs of mental health issues
before they break down.
Let's not wait for them to check that box.
Let's teach them about ways to prevent that box
from being checked in the first place.
I wanna get into the tools, but before we do that,
I think it's important to spend a few minutes talking about
the people who are at risk,
because it's not just these type A, you know,
ambitious people.
It's not, you know, I mentioned the single mom
who can't slow down,
who maybe doesn't have a partner to support her, right?
Like who doesn't have the financial resources.
It's not just the high powered lawyer or doctor.
It's someone who like me, you me, has come from scarcity trauma, who
didn't grow up with much.
Maybe they have an immigrant background too.
And they don't know how to stop working because they're always
afraid of running out.
It could be the educator, the teacher who doesn't even
eat lunch because she's so busy trying to help her students
and she neglects her own needs.
The entrepreneur who doesn't want to be bankrupt again,
so doesn't stop working, in fact,
can't even enjoy vacations, right?
This is different than burnout.
When you remove them from the work, they're still busy.
So think about the everyday people in your life
who are the rock, who can't say no,
who do for others, who give,
they cancel down and they don't acknowledge their pain.
Eventually it could lead to a clinical depression,
or eventually it could lead to a physical breakdown,
or it eventually leads to coping in ways
that aren't healthy like excessive substance use,
being on your phone too much, gambling, things like that.
What's happening in the brain?
So depression, what we What's happening in the brain?
So depression, what we used to think in the brain
had to do with three neurotransmitters.
It used to be thought that there was a depletion
with dopamine, norepinephrine, serotonin.
But now what we're learning is that this was an old model.
For example, if it were just about those neurotransmitters,
then we could just put everyone on a pill
and everyone would get better, right?
We'd all be happy.
There'd be no depression.
But it's not that simple.
And what we're learning now that it's
about a lack of healthy connectivity,
neuroplasticity, which is a fancy way of saying
that our brain cells are not being connected in ways
that they should be so that we can feel a sense of joy.
And the reason that we know that is because when we look at brains using functional MRIs,
we know that depressed brains are not as connected as brains that are not depressed and that
it's not just about these three chemicals.
I mentioned earlier that there are other chemicals involved, glutamate, GABA, the GABA, the one for anxiety and stress,
that all play in a role together to work together
to make sure the brain is connected
in ways that is healthy.
And I wish I could say that you could just
image your brain and say, this is what's happening,
but we're not there yet.
But we are learning that experiences
can change your brain.
For example, meditating, things like being still
and present, mindfulness.
Sometimes we see that with the brain,
the way that a brain that is mindful and meditating,
it looks as if the brain is being treated
for a depression, right?
Because we're able to open up these pathways
by utilizing skills to help us
to have more emotional regulation.
I imagine that the patient who suffers from this
may be more treatment resistant
than the average person who's suffering.
Because despite the anhedonia
and the kind of isolation
that that produces, there is something self-affirming
about being high functioning.
And for good reason, like it feels good to like
be productive and get things done.
And irrespective of the symptoms that you're experiencing,
what you're proposing is we untie this knot.
And that's sort of like a threat, right?
Like, oh, you're telling me that all these things
that I need to do and have done forever
that have propelled me throughout my life,
I now have to put the brakes on or set aside.
Like, no, thank you.
I'm not, you know, like that's too scary
because then my whole life is gonna collapse.
Like your whole worldview has to be rewired.
It's that all or nothing thinking with my clients
that I see it's like, what do you mean?
In order to access joy, I can't be the person I was.
You're not able to access joy
because you are the person that you are.
It is a complete different mindset for these people.
I'm not saying you have to stop.
I'm saying to slow down, just a little.
Try it just one day.
You know, it could be that one day that you say rather than waking up and going straight
to the coffee and then going straight to work, waking up, sitting and journaling.
Or you know, instead of going from meeting to meeting,
you literally pencil in a bathroom break
so you can go and relieve yourself.
It's really hard to feel pleasure
when your belly is distended with urine.
Does it get that bad?
Like people won't go to the bathroom?
They will not.
I actually gave a talk recently
to a room full of high powered executive women.
And I asked them,
how many of you have worked straight through a day
and you really had to pee and you didn't,
and they just like started laughing.
It was like this human experience
that they all had together, you know?
Because we invalidate our bodies all the time
in the way that we invalidate
what has happened to us in the past.
And the way that we invalidate our emotions.
We invalidate our bodily sensations all the time.
You know, when you think of athletes who they're in pain
and they don't stop and the doctor says, you have to stop.
You're gonna really hurt yourself, but they don't.
They're like, nope, no pain, no gain.
And then they finally have this incredible
really serious injury and it stops them.
Their body says no.
And when your body says no, you have to,
you have to stop, you know?
It's the same thing.
They don't invalidate how they feel physically
or emotionally or psychologically.
It's weird how the human brain is so resistant
to these ideas until you hit the wall and crash and burn.
And then it's like, okay, now I'll look at this
and do something about it.
But obviously the course correction
was available all along, right?
It's just that we have to,
despite however many books we read,
we have to crash the car before we're actually willing
to entertain it.
Yeah, as thought leaders,
you have to constantly slow down
and practice the things that you learn
and the things that you preach.
And it doesn't mean that you're not intelligent.
It just means that as humans, we go back into our defaults.
This is who we are.
Is it in your experience more acute with women
and women of color who are in the workplace
because there is this very real thing that,
look, I've got to show up and go above and beyond
to distinguish myself in a male dominated environment,
for example.
Well, with women for sure,
women are twice as likely to have depression and anxiety
compared to men, twice.
And so there's some real science to that.
When you look at the science of your
happiness as a woman, biologically, you are dealing with hormonal changes once a month.
And that could be related to either your period or perimenopause or menopause, right? And
then if it's perimenopause and menopause, that's more frequent than once a month. And
then when you look at psychologically, women tend to have a lot of personal traumas that
sometimes don't even get addressed.
They have attachment styles that maybe they're partnered with the wrong person.
And then socially, they have pressures that men don't have.
They have to be career moms.
They tend to be people that are caregivers, and then the other aggressions that happen.
And then when you look at black women,
black women have high rates of trauma.
PTSD is really high in the black community.
And then they have other aggressions socially
that others don't have to deal with.
So absolutely, women and women of color,
they constantly have to wear a mask
of pathological productivity.
If they slow down and if they say something's wrong,
someone else will take their job,
or you're called emotional, you know,
or people say that you're complaining,
you should be grateful to be where you are.
So I definitely see that in women and women of color.
Let's get to that. I spent my life challenging conventional narratives about fitness, about nutrition, about what's
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Five Vs.
Let's start to solve this problem, right?
What's your sort of introduction to orienting us around
the tools that we can all use to begin
to take a different direction
if you're somebody who is suffering from this.
So the reason that I thought of the five V's
was because I've traveled the world
looking at different cultures
and there are certain numbers that pop up
across different countries.
The number three, the number seven, the number five.
And I thought about five because most of us
have five fingers, you know?
So there's something about five that connects us
as human beings.
And I wanted to have with my clients something
that they could readily access when they're feeling empty
and they're having anedonia.
I want them to look at their hands
and say to yourself, you were built with the DNA for joy.
It is literally built into your DNA,
but you just forgot how to access it.
And just imagine tapping into one of the five E's
and reclaiming your points of joy.
And the reason I say points of joy
is because I don't want people to think,
oh, I'm going to be happy once I do the five V's.
It's not about happy.
It's not about this idea of my problem's being solved
and I'm fixed for good.
It's about getting those small points every day
and saying, today I have a point,
tomorrow maybe I'll have two.
It's not about a state. It's about just getting those pleasurable moments.
So the first V is validation.
Validating yourself looks like accepting how you feel and acknowledging it.
And I talked about how if you're not able to acknowledge how you feel, there's a great
deal of uncertainty and a great deal of anxiety
because you don't even know what emotion you're feeling.
And so that's really important
because people with high functioning depression
tend to push down their emotions.
It feels indulgent to do that.
It does.
Trust me, I know.
You know, when I started validating and self-validating,
I would be like, you're just being lazy
or like you just gotta get over it.
It takes a lot of practice.
And also how is this related to happiness?
The uncertainty of not knowing how you feel creates anxiety.
One of the points that is measured in happiness is that tension, that uncertainty.
And so if you're able to decrease points of uncertainty, that in itself is bringing you
joy.
You know, when you think about being happy, people think it's just one emotion, like in
the smile.
But adding up all of the sensations that bring joy, it's not just a smile. But adding up all of the sensations that bring joy, it's not just a smile. It's
a, when I'm tense, I feel relaxed. You know, when I'm tired, I can get rest. When I'm hungry,
I feel satisfied. These are all the points that we add up to measure happiness. So knowing
how you feel and naming it
and having that certainty decreases that anxiety.
And that's how it relates to joy.
It also feels like a tool to rewrite a story
that isn't working anymore.
And by that, I mean, we all have a story about who we are
and why we do what we do.
But if your story is like, this is how I do it.
And I'm like, I'm not the most talented,
but I'm gonna out all of that, right?
By understanding what's beneath it
and putting a word to it,
you can reframe the story
and start telling a different one, I think.
And I think a lot about like how the stories we tell ourselves
inform our behavior and what we do.
And we're so locked into them,
we rarely ever even put them under a microscope
and analyze whether they're actually true or not.
Well, I mean, I use myself as an example.
I recently had to go to this really important,
intense meeting with these world leaders.
And I was just feeling so like,
I didn't know how I was feeling.
I was like, just jumpy.
And then I had to tell myself, I was like,
Judith, you're nervous.
And then I had to trace back and be like,
well, why are you nervous?
Well, it's because you don't feel like you're enough.
And why don't you feel like you're enough?
Well, because all these people are older than you.
Well, why is that?
Well, because, you know, they've been doing this a long time.
It's like, oh, but Judith, remember, you're the expert in this
and you're going to be there helping them.
And I'm like, oh, that helped.
And it sounds so indulgent, right?
Like sitting there and acknowledging my feelings and tracing back.
But knowing why I felt that way
allowed me to then self soothe and feel more joyful.
And then I was actually able to relish in the experience.
I was chatting and joking and I walked away
with a very different experience
that I would have five years ago.
Five years ago, I would have still had my stomach in knots
and probably would have ruminating
and analyzing every interaction.
But now I can access joy of like being
in other people's presence, learning from others.
I walk away feeling as if I got some points
from that interaction versus leaving the points
on the table.
It also allows you to change the memories you select, right?
Like if you have that good experience,
like if you're somebody who's like, well, I'm anxious
because your brain will point to a variety of memories
in which you were in a similar situation
and maybe it didn't go so well.
But now you have these new memories and experiences
that can inform that new story.
It's really changing a narrative.
I do talk about that in my book.
What about the venting part?
The venting, well venting,
from a scientific perspective,
venting in physics is when you,
let's say you have a balloon
and you're letting the air out.
So the air is escaping and you're releasing pressure.
Venting from a psychological perspective
is expressing negative emotions.
And for many people, they believe
that venting is the same as trauma dumping.
I feel a certain way.
I'm going to go and talk to someone
and just let them have it.
But it's not the same.
Healthy venting is doing so with intention.
So when you're going to talk to someone about something,
you are going to have this intention of,
okay, I want a resolution, I want feedback,
I wanna solve this problem.
It's just not for me to feel good letting out how I feel,
because there are recent studies that show that
if you're just trauma dumping,
you're just like telling people how you feel, good or bad, and we're not really being empathic in the intervention, you're not asking them
how they feel about it.
If they're ready, you're not getting that emotional consent from them, then you're essentially
making yourself feel worse.
The research paper says that it's like pouring gas into a fire.
So when you do decide to verbally vent and talk to someone, make sure that you first
self-validate, you walk through your emotions and why you're feeling that way, that you self-vent to
yourself, maybe talk to yourself. You know, there's recent data showing that people who talk to
themselves actually get to better resolutions and they feel better when they vent. And so that you're
not just picking random people to vent to. So many of us, unfortunately, we vent to our kids.
And we have to think about that power dynamic.
Your child is not going to say no.
They want to feel attached.
They want to feel accepted by you.
So they're just going to listen, but they're
going to worry about you.
Think about who you're talking to in your workplace.
If the person reports to you and you're venting to them,
they're not going to want to piss off the boss, right? So really think about who you want talking to in your workplace. If the person reports to you and you're venting to them, they're not gonna wanna piss off the boss, right?
So really think about who you wanna talk to
and vent with intention and ask for emotional consent.
The vomit version of that
is making it somebody else's problem,
as opposed to being a collaborator
in looking for a solution.
Yeah, because then that person will just go ahead
and vent to someone at home and it just becomes a cycle.
It's the contagious part, right?
Yes.
And then there's the values,
which is basically just being clear on like who you are
and what's important to you and having a compass.
It's important.
I do believe that over time, our values do change the things that give us purpose and
meaning.
I remember when I was younger, I really loved reading and it wasn't about the prize, the
gold sticker.
It was about having this experience of escaping these, you know, situations where I didn't
have much and just being able to fantasize
and imagine myself in a world.
And just reading gave me so much pleasure.
But then over time, reading became,
oh, well, you're the fastest reader in the class.
You're gonna get this award
and then you're gonna go into these schools.
And over time, reading was a way to not fail.
You know, you had to read the organic chemistry
or else you'd fail the exam.
And I just stopped really enjoying learning and reading.
It was just something to do to avoid failure.
So I do think over time, our values change.
And it's helpful to, again, sit still and reflect
and to go back in time and figure out
what was it that lit you up?
Why is it that I feel meh or blah?
At what point did I lose that?
I'm curious in your own life,
if this is an issue for you now,
because you're in this new chapter of your life, right?
You strived, you got to a certain place,
you had to reconcile all of these issues within yourself.
So you could be more joyful and happy, et cetera.
But then you write this book about this thing
and suddenly you're on the Today Show
and you're traveling here
and I'm sure you're in high demand as a speaker, et cetera.
Those are very, you know, like activating
for that disposition to be high functioning
in an unhealthy way.
So it's almost as if the universe like delivered you,
like, okay, you're gonna write the book about this.
Like, let's see if you can practice it
in the most intense set of circumstances
in which you're gonna be given opportunities
to be lured right back into that way of being.
Yes, and that's why I have to constantly go back
to the science of my own happiness.
I was just talking to a friend of mine
who has a very successful podcast earlier this week.
And she told me, she was like, make sure you're
taking it all in.
Make sure you're doing the things that bring you joy.
So I am intentional on my travels.
When I see someone in the audience
who I can tell that they're really impacted by my work,
I will make it a point to talk to that person.
And they may cry, they may laugh, they may hug.
But again, I understand for me it's connection.
Connection makes me feel joyful.
And so if I'm going from place to place
and I don't have time to even connect with anyone,
then I know that this is a problem.
I'm going to end up with anhedonia.
And not to say that you're going to be completely healed.
I think it's important to know, I don't want you to tap into all five Vs all the time.
Don't be high functioning like that.
Really focus on one or two that you need in the moment.
And when you do understand yourself and you understand the science of your happiness,
it becomes very clear.
What are the things that you need to do to stay joyful?
And you will be intentional about protecting those things.
And that's where the values really come in.
What are the things that anchor you?
The next one is vitals.
This is the one that's-
This is basically lifestyle.
Yes, it's the mind body.
You only get one body and brain. Yes, it's the mind body.
You only get one body and brain.
You have to take care of them.
You know, I won't bore you with the traditional ones,
sleep and movement and diet,
but there are those non-traditional ones
that we don't acknowledge.
You know, like our relationship with technology
is a huge one.
I'm on socials and I teach social media to doctors,
so I have to like be up on that,
but I have to be very careful not to spend too much time
on my phone because it is literally draining your joy.
Talk about anhedonia.
When you're on your phone all the time and you're not out in the world
and you're not talking with people and you're not engaging in the physical sensations
of being a human being,
that is how you become anadonic.
For sure. Yes.
What do we know or not know about the incidents of this
in our current moment?
Like it feels like we're in a situation
in which we're just rife for this being kind of epidemic in proportion,
is that the case?
And if so, beyond just get off your phone,
how do you make sense of that?
Forensically, what's going on in our culture
that is fueling and contributing to this?
Well, there was a recent study
that came out of one of the Texas universities where they
took adults out, you know, it was in a lab setting, but essentially they changed the
settings on their smartphones so that instead of having the capacity to go online seamlessly,
their phones became kind of like the old flip phones where you couldn't, you know, be on
social media. You could use your phone to stay connected and old flip phones where you couldn't be on social media.
You could use your phone to stay connected and call people,
but you couldn't constantly be online.
And what they found is that when they limited this
for these individuals for two weeks,
the amount of joy that they started to experience
was similar to as if they had gotten a treatment
for a depression.
And the reason that they found that this worked
is because these people were spending less time on a device
and more time connecting or walking in nature
or moving or sleeping.
All of the things that I said, when we add up points of joy,
this is what we measure happiness with.
So all of those human sensations were being accessed more
when you weren't on your screen.
I don't think there's a way to measure
anhedonia across the country and the nation yet,
but we all have smartphones.
Most of us do.
So imagine if we just knew that this science was out there.
We would probably be more intentional about how much time
we spend on our phones.
There's a lot of focus on
kids, a lot of focus on children, but not enough on adults. And these are the studies that we need
because this is showing us and validating for us what we're already experiencing. Those who are
listening, who are like, why, how did I get this way? Why am I so anadonic? These studies are
important because they not just explain and validate, but they give us solutions.
and because they not just explain and validate, but they give us solutions.
COVID harkened in this Zoom culture,
work from home as a normal thing, even among young people.
So I suspect that drives disconnection and loneliness
and more screen time.
But it's not just the screens,
it's the combative antagonistic nature of,
what the algorithms are increasingly serving us up,
as well as the comparison aspect of it,
where everybody's living a better life than you,
that's fueling on some level depression perhaps,
but also might be catalytic for this particular condition
of high functioning depression,
because it's reinforcing this idea,
like you've got to get out there.
You've got, you know, like you have to do something
with your life and you know, you can't take a break
and you know, all of that.
And that you're not good enough.
Does that track with, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That you're not good enough.
And you're never going to be.
Because every night you look at your phone
and you realize like there's people much better.
Like all of it's like an incessant,
reinforcement vehicle that is just creating
more and more of this sense of depression, right?
Is that- Of unworthiness, yeah.
Looking at your phone and seeing what other people are doing.
It further reinforces that idea that you're unworthy.
And then what do you do?
Then you have to do more.
And then you have to continue people pleasing.
And then you're depleting yourself of joy, right?
It all ties together.
It's interesting that you brought up Zoom because-
Which is its own masochism.
It's a masochistic, yeah.
You know, the Zoom fatigue is real.
There's an entire study center at Stanford
called the Zoom Fatigue Center.
Really?
An entire center. Oh my God.
I had to learn about it because I do these corporate talks
and many people are feeling blah, blah,
and they're like, well, how did I get this way?
And I'm like, you know,
seeing yourself all day long is not healthy.
You know, if I had an image of myself behind you right now,
I would be so distracted.
I'd probably be like, oh my gosh,
is my allergies, you know, flaring up?
I would not- It is weird that they show you,
like they should get rid of that part.
Completely unnatural, the same with our kids.
Because everybody's looking at themselves the whole time.
They're looking at themselves.
And there's this phenomenon in psychiatry
called the autoscopic phenomenon.
And with people who have psychosis or hallucinations,
like people who, some people with schizophrenia,
some people with bipolar psychosis,
they may have these hallucinations where they see themselves.
And it is really stressful for them.
Some of them become very depressed.
Some of them become so anxious
that they don't wanna leave their rooms. So imagine we become so anxious that they don't want to leave their rooms.
So imagine we are walking around,
we don't have psychosis,
but we're giving ourselves that autoscopic phenomenon
by looking at ourselves all the time.
We're not supposed to look at ourselves
while looking at other people.
I'm supposed to be talking to you
and seeing whether or not you agree or disagree
or whether or not you're harmful or safe.
We were made to look at others
and to get information from others
because we're social creatures.
Once in a while, looking at yourself in a mirror
or in a reflection is okay,
but looking at yourself all day long is unnatural.
Yeah, and on Zoom, if you turn off the camera,
then people just assume you've left the room
or you're just pretending to pay, you're stuck.
You have to, right?
They should have an option though to have it on
but allow you to not have to look at it.
They do, but the problem is that culturally we're taught,
and you see this with the generations,
all the generations think that that's you being rude, right?
So that there's this peer pressure,
this culture that everyone has to be on Zoom.
And if you're off camera, or if you don't see yourself, you're considered rude. So there's
that pressure from the cultural side of work.
What kind of studies is this center at Stanford running on this?
Oh, wow. They have an entire Zoom fatigue survey. When I first started talking about
it, I would encourage
people to go to that website and take their surveys.
But the other things they found was that when you're on Zoom, you're not moving as much.
You know, again, we weren't made to sit at a desk all day long.
And so some of the things that they suggest is getting a standing desk or taking calls
while walking, getting an external camera so that it forces you to pivot a little bit.
There are all these tools that they have.
And also encouraging others to let's all be off camera, let's all give ourselves a break,
so that it's a part of the work culture and you're not staying at your screen.
Because what that is doing is that you're forcing yourself to not just look at yourself,
but you're also looking at all these faces at once.
Again, if you were in a board meeting,
you wouldn't be looking at everyone like this all the time.
You'd be looking at one person, another person.
So there's something very unnatural about it.
And it's harming our brains.
I can sit in my desk and work or write
and be very focused and calm.
But the minute I get on a Zoom call,
I feel like I'm like agitated.
Like I don't, I feel like I need to get up
and move around or whatever.
It's a very different experience.
There's a lot of pressure involved.
It's unnatural.
You know, it's very different than if you were saying,
let's all meet in person.
You don't get the same angst,
but when you have to be on a Zoom
and there's all this pressure to be presenting yourself
all the time, you're causing your brain to go into overdrive.
It's unnecessary work.
Again, one of the points of joy is releasing and decreasing
stress.
And you're not able to access that
if you're in this state of, I have to perform.
The final V is vision.
So what is that all about?
Well, this V is very important for me
because if I don't plan joy, it is not going to happen.
For many of us who are busy
and we get into these patterns of doing,
we often don't plan the joy
and it doesn't have to be big joy.
It could be the small joys. Like, you
know, after I speak with you today, I'm going to go and sit and have a nice meal and I'm
going to taste it and not rush it. But for others, it could be something like, you know,
if I get my kid to school on time, I'm going to sit in my living room and have a cup of
coffee in silence. And I'm going to acknowledge this win, you know?
So planning joy is important
because there's this large body of research in fantasy,
right, when we can imagine things
and we look forward to things, we're more hopeful.
We are less stressed.
You know, we experience these points of joy more.
So it's important to plan things in the future
so that you don't get stuck in the past,
so that you keep moving forward.
What about pharmacological interventions?
We all know about the challenges
or in kind of ineffectiveness overall of SSRIs.
Is there an appropriate intervention in that way
for something like this, or is it just the five Vs
and this is what we should focus on?
Well, many of my patients who have high function depression,
they've also had clinical depressions
or they can slip into a clinical depression.
And these medications, antidepressants,
they are FDA approved for major depressive disorder.
And some people will need medications and that's okay, right?
We all have a unique biopsychosocial,
just like we all have a unique fingerprint.
And so for some people, I will need to prescribe medications,
especially if they have a major depressive disorder.
For others who have, you know,
in the biopsychosocial there's the psychology part.
Some people have comorbid ADHD, you know,
and sometimes I have to prescribe stimulants
because it's really hard to get things done
if you can't focus.
And if you don't get things done,
you feel bad about yourself and that can create a depression.
And for others, their traumas are severe enough
that they're physiologically in fight or flight.
So I may have to prescribe things
that dampen the fight or flight so that they can actually
do the work and feel safe.
Everyone's different.
And when you look at the biological,
some people have medical conditions,
like an autoimmune condition that makes it really difficult
to access joy.
So they may need support there or thyroid issues
like myself.
Everyone's going to be different.
And it's a case by case scenario,
but I am not against medication for the treatment
and relief of symptoms,
but it's not the only thing that's important.
Are there other conditions
that have a high correlation with this,
like ADHD or something like that,
that commonly, you know, you see?
ADHD for sure.
A lot of folks who are neurodivergent, they feel as if they have to put in so much
more effort, you know, to show up.
And again, if you believe that, you know, you're not anything without your role, then
you're working overtime.
Many of my patients with ADHD, they're constantly masking.
They're constantly trying to be something to be loved,
to be accepted.
And it's draining.
And that's why there's a high correlation
between ADHD and depression.
They travel together and so does anxiety.
You know, if you have to use so much of your mental energy
to get things done, then that, again,
it increases stress and having stress detracts from joy.
Tell me about your lab.
So you run this all women lab.
What are you looking at?
What are you studying at?
And what are some of the interesting findings
that are coming out of your lab?
Well, we just hired our first man in the year, so.
You can't make that claim anymore.
It's okay.
It was never intentional to be all women.
It just happened to be that way.
At one point it was all mostly men.
So things work out how they work out.
We have a great team.
A poor guy.
He's awesome.
But we are, it's interesting.
I have this lab where I do a lot of research that is cutting edge.
Right now, one of our biggest studies is looking at psilocybin and postpartum depression.
And in order to do these types of studies,
you have to have a certain license with the DEA
because it's not legal for use in New York.
I believe it's only legal in Oregon, I think,
but even then it's not federally legal.
But we're looking at approaching depression differently
in postpartum brains compared to other avenues.
And you know how I talked about how
depression is in just those three neurotransmitters,
serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine?
With a lot of postpartum brains, they are highly anxious.
And that's why a lot of women will say, I keep checking on my child to make sure they're breathing
and I can't stop.
And there's so much anxiety around giving birth.
And it takes away from the joy of connecting with your child.
You're not getting that bonding that
is so important for you as a mother and for your child.
And with depression in mothers, we are looking for solutions that are quicker because, you
know, we want these moms to be able to have that attachment with their child.
So I'm really excited about some of the studies that we're doing in this area because I don't
know if it's going to work or not.
It's double blind placebo controlled, so we don't have access to knowing who's on what, but the goal is that we provide options
that help you to recover more quickly.
Yeah, there's an immediacy to it,
like an immediate effectiveness with also the possibility
that it is more persistent and long lasting.
I mean, that's the hope, right?
Like, but you have to go into this.
You can't have that preconceived attachment to the outcome.
The interesting thing about this work is that
it's not just about this exposure to this drug.
A lot of the work, the sustained work has to do
with continuing your meditative
and mindfulness practices going forward.
So it's not enough just to dose people.
You have to train them in how to meditate,
how to practice mindfulness throughout this exposure
and to continue that work afterwards,
which I think is part of that whole spirituality thing.
In my early years, I felt like I had to choose
either my faith or science.
And this type of work is so validating
because you see aspects of both.
You know, I talked about how with monks,
when they meditate and you see the changes in their brains
similar to what you would see
when you're treating depression.
Well, this type of research validates that
because you have to do a lot of the meditative work
while you're going through these dosing sessions.
And then you have to continue the work afterwards.
Happiness requires a relationship with faith on some level,
like a relationship with something transcendent.
And we're in this highly secular world
in which the rational mind has domain over these ideas
which are sort of thought of in a lesser way, I suppose. in which the rational mind has domain over these ideas,
which are sort of thought of in a lesser way, I suppose. But I think that that is a cross purposes
with the happiness that we seek.
And on some level is fueling the happiness crisis
that we're experiencing.
I 100% agree.
I mean, you don't have to be religious.
You don't have to believe in God.
But when you walk out in nature and you see these incredible
landscapes, you just realize, wow, I'm here for a reason.
The chances of me existing are so small to begin with,
so I'm here for a reason.
And that just creates that sense of awe.
And you know the research on that.
So I would challenge you to not to just go beyond the things
that you can read in a paper.
We don't know everything.
And I think we are losing sight of that faith aspect,
believing in things that we can't prove or see.
I think being on phones has a lot to do with that.
When you're constantly on a device,
you're not thinking about others.
You're not practicing compassion.
There's this, I think, void of compassion education
in our systems.
Like we don't, unless you go to a religious school,
you're not learning about empathy and compassion.
So you're not thinking about who you are
in relation to others in the world
and how to connect to others in the world.
What's the most difficult aspect of this for you to practice?
Like what comes up for you where you're like,
no, I don't wanna do that.
Yeah, I wanna go back to my old ways.
Oh my goodness.
If there's a great opportunity,
I have to lean on my team to be like,
please help me to say no.
You can harder to say no, right?
The opportunities are cooler, more fun and pay more.
The more you kind of ascend this hill that you're on.
But then they take me away from the things
that bring me the most joy.
For me, it's my daughter.
So if I, right now, if I'm like,
hmm, I could get make a lot of money
and I could meet these cool people,
but I will miss out on time with her.
Then I'm like, no, I won't do that.
You gotta go to the values V for that one.
Yes, yes.
And that's what really makes me feel joyful
because I can go and do these great things
and I get a sense of purpose.
But if I'm sacrificing too much of my connection,
you know, with the people that I love,
then it is not worth it.
I wanna take a turn here
and spend a few minutes talking
about public health communication.
You've been teaching media training
for over 10 years now, right?
At NYU? Yes.
So I wanna hear how that even came together.
But we were talking before the podcast,
like I think a lot about the importance
of the public facing scientist, medical doctor,
psychiatrist who understands how to communicate
their expertise in a public facing way.
And I think there is a real need right now
for people who are skilled at that.
You're certainly one of those people,
but we need more of them.
And it is a skill that has to be taught
and learned and practiced.
And I think a lot of people in your profession
and related professions are very good at what they do
and they understand it completely,
but they don't exactly know how to communicate it
in a way that is impactful to the public.
And I think because of that,
we have a lot of confusion out there across the board
on a number of issues.
And that void is filled by people
who don't understand the science as well,
but are very effective at communicating
whatever perspective it is that they feel compelled to share.
Yeah, I mean, when I first started this media road,
it was by accident, really.
I was in training at NYU and I was in the ER at the time.
Bellevue just opened the first major psychiatric
emergency room for children.
I did adult psychiatry first and then I did child psychiatry.
And the head of the hospital system,
she wasn't seeing patients anymore.
So she asked me, can you do this interview with me
with this reporter?
They want to learn about the ER.
And I said, sure, because I'm working in the ER, she's not.
And after I saw the interview published,
I was like, oh my gosh, we need media training
because I was terrible. So I went to the director oh my gosh, we need media training. Cause I was terrible.
So I went to the director and I said, we need media training.
He was like, well, you create the training and that was the solution. It was like a very Socratic method of teaching.
And I developed this course.
And early on in the course, I worked with NYU undergrads in the film school
because they would, it was almost like a barter system.
They got credit.
school, because it was almost like a barter system. They got credit.
They would help me to film these grand rounds
and make them digestible for the public.
And in return, I would help them with their scripts
because they would put a lot of psychological themes
into their scripts.
So it was really interesting.
And then it evolved into teaching young doctors
how to give press interviews.
And it started off with traditional press,
like television, radio, print.
And then after the pandemic, they
wanted more information as to how
to provide this news online using social media.
And they found it challenging because their patients would
come to them and say, I saw this TikTok.
I think this is what I have.
And they'd be like, no, you don't have it.
And they were like, we need help.
We need to be able to talk about this
in a way that's entertaining and also evidence-based,
which is really difficult to do in 60 seconds or less, right?
Now 40 seconds because of the short attention span.
And so I help these doctors to, number one,
get over their fears because many times in medicine,
you are so worried about how people perceive you
that you're careful.
So you say things like,
I gotta say this right and say the study right.
And by the time you're done saying what you're saying,
no one can understand it.
And they've already turned the channel.
I work with them to say, it's okay to make mistakes.
You're not gonna get sued.
Just stick to what you know and what you know to be true.
Like have an agenda and have a story.
People connect to stories.
And so now when they're in front of the cameras
or they're doing TikToks,
they're bringing all of these medical terms into a story
that a patient can understand.
So the hope is that the patient will look at their TikTok
or their reel and follow them versus, you know,
some of the other people online who are not experts.
They were never trained,
but they're really good storytellers.
What is the perspective writ large like big med,
like in terms of medical doctors being, you know,
information and content creators,
like is it more receptive than it used to be?
Because I can only imagine not that long ago
where it was like, no, you're here to do this,
not do this, do that when you're home.
Like, that's a distraction from your core job.
And it is kind of, I mean,
it is taking you away from the thing, right?
You'd be surprised doctors are so efficient with their time. Most of the creators I mean, it is taking you away from the thing, right? You'd be surprised doctors are so efficient with their time.
Most of the creators I know,
they create all their content in a batch
because they're high functioning, like myself.
You shoot for three hours a day,
and that's three hours a week, and that's it.
Or two hours a week in your own time.
But initially when I was doing this work,
people were saying things like,
oh, what are you trying to be an actress?
Or why are you online?
Aren't you worried that people won't take you seriously?
The opposite happened.
The more that I gave information online,
the more people wanted this information.
And larger institutions were saying, can you teach us?
So now I create these courses for larger hospitals.
I've been to multiple hospitals teaching this
because the doctors want to know how to do this.
They understand that their patients are getting this information online. larger hospitals, I've been to multiple hospitals teaching this because the doctors want to know how to do this.
They understand that their patients are getting
this information online.
So it's best to come from them and not an influencer.
I told you I'm getting back surgery soon.
So I had my first appointment a while back with the surgeon.
And of course there's the resident, right?
So the resident comes in and sees me first
and we go over a bunch of stuff and he goes away. And then the surgeon comes in's the resident, right? So the resident comes in and sees me first and we go over a bunch of stuff and he goes away.
And then the surgeon comes in with the resident,
but I had an opportunity to really talk
with the resident for quite a bit of time.
And I really liked him.
That was like several weeks ago.
And then I'm on my, I'm scrolling Instagram,
like a video comes up and I'm like, wait, I know that.
I was like, that's my, that's the president.
And he has 400,000 followers.
And he's posting these incredible videos
where he's talking about neurosurgery and the brain
and he's showing these diagrams and he's doing it.
This is what it's, you know, here's a day in my life.
And I'm, you know, UCLA is a teaching hospital
and here's how it works.
And I was like, this is kind of incredible.
It is.
And I thought it was really cool,
but obviously there's more and more of this going on.
And I think that's a good thing, you know,
as I said earlier, like it's, it's like free education.
Like in 60 seconds, I learned something
about the way the brain worked that I didn't know.
Well, it is, and it's actually being studied now
at Harvard T. Chan School of Public Health,
because they partnered with the WHO.
And the WHO, the World Health Organization,
has doctors all over the world trying
to use this new research to educate people
and also entertain people.
Because when you're doing it on your own as a physician,
you can feel so lonely.
And you may stop doing it because maybe some people
in your circles don't approve, or you just
don't feel encouraged.
And the WHO has partnered with Harvard and other platforms,
like TikTok and other social media platforms,
to create this community of content creators
who are physicians and healthcare professionals so that we can combat this misinformation in a fun way, an entertaining
way.
There's a great need for it.
What I've found in the course that I teach, the doctors will say, it hasn't just helped
me to create more joy in my life, but it's also allowed me to communicate better with
my patients in real life because you're learning how to communicate
in such a short amount of time
and to be entertaining online,
you're actually improving your skills
of patient communication in person.
So I think this is only going to spread
and become more relevant.
There's more research happening in this field
and more support.
And so I think this is going to be the future of medicine.
Beyond the short form aspect of it,
I think orienting people around how to be effective
on a podcast in long form.
I mean, you're very good at it.
This has been fantastic,
but not all scientists and medical doctors are
because they're in their own world
and they have less objectivity about what's landing with an audience and what isn't
and how to communicate their expertise
in the context of a story or something relatable
for an audience that engages them such that they remember it.
Well, I told you already,
I think you're gonna be Professor Rich.
Okay, yeah, all right. we're gonna need people like you.
This is my future.
Yeah, all right.
So my future.
I would love to come and talk to your students,
but not on Zoom.
Can I do it in person or is it only online?
All right, well, next time I come to New York.
Final thing.
So I come into your office,
I'm suffering, anedinia, I can't sleep, anxiety ridden, but I gotta keep going
because I've got this thing and I've got that thing
and whatever.
What is the prescription that you provide me
before I leave your office?
Like what is the top level thing that I need to do first?
There's all these Vs, I get it theoretically,
but like, what can I do right now today
that will move the needle in the right direction?
Well, I mean, whenever I have someone in my office like this,
I, first of all, I ask them to thank themselves.
And I say, you know what?
You should be grateful to yourself
because you didn't have to be here.
But there was something in you that you listened to.
You didn't ignore it and you didn't push it down.
And because you were able to do that,
you were going to create change in your life.
And if you can keep doing that,
that's where you start is that self validation.
And you just do a little bit of it every day.
Over time, you're gonna get closer
to getting the answers that you need
to really unlock the signs of your happiness.
It's so important.
Start small, start self-validating every day.
Take that time and tell yourself you're worthy of it.
That's where you begin.
And it may sound really cheesy,
but many people have a hard time doing it.
It's like deeply uncomfortable.
Yes, it is.
Even saying it right now,
some people may be feeling-
It's like super cringe.
Yes, yes, they feel cringe.
But it is so important.
If you can't validate yourself,
then how are you gonna expect to get validation from others?
And that's what many of us are seeking.
Well, I'm gonna take that to heart
and I'm gonna practice it.
And this has been very, very helpful to me.
And like I said, I do think the universe conspired
to bring us together,
cause I needed to read your book, I needed to meet you.
And this has proven to be very, very helpful to me
on a personal level.
So thank you.
Oh, thank you for having me.
Thanks for the work that you do.
You're a marvel.
I would love to have you back.
I wanna stay abreast of the work
that's happening in your lab and I celebrate you.
Thank you.
Yeah, thanks for being here today.
I appreciate you.
Cool, peace.
Peace.
That's it for today.
Thank you for listening.
I truly hope you enjoyed the conversation.
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including links and resources related
to everything discussed today,
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