The Rich Roll Podcast - Travis Barker On Premonition, Intuition & The Importance Of Following Your Heart

Episode Date: January 23, 2017

Dubbed one of the “100 Greatest Drummers of All Time” by Rolling Stone, Travis Barker rose from blue collar roots to become one of the world's most talented, prolific and hard working rock stars — a multi-hyphenate musician-producer-entrepreneur who initially made his mark as the drummer for Blink-182, the influential, multi-platinum punk-rock band that earned it's very first Grammy nomination this week for it's latest release, California. Today, Travis is celebrated for his unique percussive acumen; a rare ability to collaborate with a diversity of musical giants — people like Eminem, Lil Wayne, Slash, Mary J. Blige, RZA, Tom Morello and Steve Aoki — across a swath of genres that reach past rock to country, jazz, hip hop and everything in between. Extending his entrepreneurial flair beyond music, Travis is also the founder of accessory/apparel company Famous Stars and Straps as well as LaSalle Records and is an investor in a variety of ventures including Crossroads Kitchen – one of Los Angeles' best restaurants and perhaps the most acclaimed vegan restaurant in the world. Travis bares his soul in Can I Say: Living Large, Cheating Death, and Drums, Drums, Drums* — a deeply personal and brutally honest memoir chronicling the highlights and lowlights of the renowned drummer’s art and life, including the harrowing plane crash that nearly killed him and his traumatic road to recovery. Ultimately, it's a book about personal survival. Constant reinvention. Musical salvation. And fatherhood. Travis Barker is a great rock star. But behind the tattoos, sold out arenas and dope rides lives a quiet, soulful artist with a prodigious work ethic. A sober consciousness birthed from pain. Etched from hardship, Travis Barker has survived some serious shit. But it's our wounds that make us human. And it's that humanity that interests me the most. This is a conversation about a remarkable life. The pivotal moments that forged it. The premonitions that foretold it. The intuitions that directed it. The humanity behind it. And the heart that animates it. Open, humble and present, I absolutely loved spending time with Travis. I sincerely hope you enjoy the first of what I hope will be many future exchanges. Peace + Plants, Rich

Yeah, I feel like if you really want to do something, unless you're 110% sacrificed and ready to sacrifice everything. I didn't have no cool clothes. I didn't have a cool car. I was poor, but I just wanted to play the drums. Not for chicks, not for any other reason, but that's what I loved, you know? So, I mean, anything I'm involved with is because I absolutely love it. I've learned to trust the gut. Like if my gut and my intuition tells me no, it's a no, but everything happens for a reason. And I, and I believe in that, that saying, uh, win or learn, you know, and you know, a mistake isn't a mistake. You learn from it. And, and I, and now I'm here to say, you know, like I do trust my gut 110%. That's Travis Barkerer and this is the rich roll podcast

the rich roll podcast hey what's up you guys how you doing what's up, you guys? How you doing? What's happening? Greetings. My name is Rich Roll. I'm your host and welcome or welcome back to my podcast, the show where I get intimate and I go long form in depth with some of the world's most intriguing thought leaders and positive change makers all across the globe. I really appreciate you guys tuning in today. It means a lot to me. Thank you so much for subscribing to the show on iTunes, for sharing the show with your friends and on social media, for supporting my work through Patreon and through the Amazon banner ad at richroll.com. Really appreciate all of that very, very much. Did I mention I got Travis Barker on the podcast today?

Super excited about that. Hold on, can you guys hear that rain? It's crazy. I've lived in Los Angeles, like, I don't know, over 20 years. I have never seen a winter like this. It's been raining like crazy the past week, like sideways, pelting rain. Everything's turning green. It looks like Ireland out here. It's awesome. We really need it, but I'm not used to it now. It's unbelievable. In any event, I'm in my new container studio space,

and it's a little bit loud with the rain. So apologies if it's a little distracting. Nothing I can do about that. In any event, Travis Barker, again, super pumped to have him on the show today. You guys know this guy, right? Prolific, super talented rock and roll drummer. But maybe if you haven't heard of him, let me recap it for you. Uh, recognized by Rolling Stone as punk's first superstar drummer. Travis is a musician. He's a producer. Uh, he's an entrepreneur who rose to fame and perhaps, you know, him best as the drummer for the influential multi-platinum punk rock band Blink 182. Uh, and in fact, just this week, Blink 182 and thusvis as well were nominated for their first grammy for their latest album california so that's awesome congrats to everybody in blink

and travis for that essentially he's one of the most prolific rock drummers in the world he's incredibly talented skilled accomplished hard-working and really unique because he's very adept at essentially every musical genre, everything from punk to country, EDM, hip hop, jazz, and everything in between. In addition to what he does with Blink-182, this is a guy who has recorded or performed with all kinds of artists like Eminem, Lil Wayne, Slash, Mary J. Blige, Tom Morello, Steve Aoki, and so many, many more. And he's also an entrepreneur. He's the founder of a clothing company called Famous Stars and Straps. He's got a record label called LaSalle Records.

He's also an investor in a variety of cool businesses, including Crossroads Kitchen, which is not only one of LA's best restaurants, it's perhaps the most acclaimed vegan restaurant in the world. He's also a bestselling author. His memoir, Can I Say, is this incredibly raw, vulnerable, honest, soul-bearing chronicle of the highlights and the lowlights of what I think is a really remarkable human being's life, including the harrowing plane crash that nearly killed him and his traumatic road to recovery, which is something we spend a lot of time talking about in the podcast today. In any event, super interesting cat.

And I got a few more things I want to note about him before we delve into the conversation. But first. and I got a few more things I want to note about him before we delve into the conversation. But first. All right, Travis Barker on the podcast today. Super excited about it for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is because there are so many interesting points of commonality and intersection that I have with him. A laundry list of things that I wanted to explore with him, everything from addiction

and sobriety to his veganism, his music career, of course, his evolution as both a musician and a human being, what it means to him to live a creative life on his own terms and how he balances this rock star persona against parenting two young kids. I wanted to talk about his entrepreneurship, his fitness regimen, which I know is very, very important to him. And the truth of the matter is, I only got through a few of these things because we went so deep and so thoughtful and intentional on just a select few items.

So I want you guys to consider this part one of what I hope will be a multi-part conversation with Travis. This is just us getting to know each other a little bit. And it's really great. It came out wonderful. Travis is just such a conscious, soulful, and present human being. And I think it really comes across in this exchange. And, you know, this is a conversation that I think pivots around a couple of themes. Uh, it's about intuition. Uh, it's also about premonition. Uh, and it's a conversation about the importance of following your heart. And I think that's all I'm going to say about this one. So let's talk to Travis. about this one so let's talk to travis right on man thanks so much for uh coming over to do this with me i really appreciate it yeah thanks for having me have you done uh have you done very

many podcasts i did uh are you familiar with on it yeah yeah aubrey yeah aubrey i did aubrey's podcast aubrey's yeah was that in person or was that like a Skype thing? No, it was over Skype. Yeah. It was pretty cool. Cool, man. Well, good to have you here. Is that the only other one you've done? Yeah, I don't really do a bunch of them.

All right, cool. Well, that's good. That's exciting for me, man, because I'm really super inspired by your story and there's a lot of points of intersection that we can explore and I'm just pumped to be able to hijack you and force you to answer my questions. Cool. I'm game. I'm game. You know, I was wrapping my head around, around kind of, you know, what you're about and who you are. And I think something that's super interesting about, you know, the musical aspect of what you do is that obviously you're known as a drummer. you're a very prolific, talented, accomplished

drummer, but it's really a lot more than that because you're sort of persona or, you know, I hate that word brand, but like, you know, who you are is really much larger than that. Like you have this very kind of creative entrepreneurial approach to what you do that allows you to kind of expand outside like the four walls of a band and has allowed you to like collaborate with all these amazing musicians across all different genres, as well as, you know, get involved in all different types of businesses. Like it's a very dynamic approach to your profession and your career right is that accurate yeah i mean i've i've kind of along the way of playing music as a symptom of playing music i've been able to express myself and be successful in a couple different creative outlets which has been just amazing never

never with the intention to make money or to be successful. It was always like, well, I love doing this. And if I could make it make sense to where I don't lose money doing it, cool. And it could just be a hobby. And those hobbies have turned into, I guess, what you call business now. Right. So it's really leading with your heart, leading with your gut, leading with your instinct. Yeah.

Always. I mean, anything I'm involved with is because i absolutely love it i've learned like i've learned trust the trust the gut like if i if my if my gut my gut and my intuition tells me no it's a no where did you learn that like where does that come from i feel like i learned the hard way a little bit you know there's there's. You know, there's big pivotal decisions in my life where I've made the wrong decision. Like making the decision because of the paycheck or as opposed to the creative fulfillment of it? Yeah, or I guess just when I look back at times, I was like, whoa, I knew that didn't feel right. And I still went ahead and did it.

And I just go, why? You know, but everything happens for a reason. And I believe in that saying, win or learn, you know. And, you know, a mistake isn't a mistake. You learn from it. And now I'm here to say, you know, like I do trust my gut 110%. here to say you know like i do trust my gut 110 it seems that you know to me and kind of reviewing your story and knowing a little bit about you know where you came from that a lot of it tracks back to you know something your mom told you you know shortly before she passed i mean she passed

you were pretty young right like just before you started high school yeah it was a day before high school uh-huh and what it what what was it that she said to you she said no matter what follow your dreams and play the drums like don't stop playing like that's the one thing i think that's the one thing like i think as a child and i've seen it even with my own kids it's like if you give them the option that they don't have to do anything they're not going to do anything. So for me, they were very disciplined in like, you've got to practice x amount of hours a day. You've got to be productive. You've got to put time in with your instrument, which

was the drums for me. I mean, I sang in madrigals in school and piano, but nothing got me like the drums did. There was a portion of my life where i was like 14 15 and i thought i wanted to be a professional skateboarder but i was way way better at playing drums than skateboarding so if my mother and father wouldn't have made me practice i would have when she died there would have been nothing for her to say do that you know and she you know i started just banging on things at the age of four.

And she's like, I think he's a drummer. Right, so just the pots and pans kind of thing, right? Yeah, like pots and pans. But she showed up to support that. Like, he got you some lessons and a kit and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, she got me a teacher at the age of four that taught me how to read. And I was really good at sight reading. I was really good at just reading music in general. I would go to drum competitions and there were sight reading competitions where,

you know, I was like five or six and they'd put a sheet of music ahead of you. You've never seen in front of you and you just have to kill it. You know, you have to go there and do it. And I was really good at sight reading. And then. So you picked up learning how to read music at how old? Yeah. Five and six years old. Wow. That's almost like some crazy past life thing, right? Like you were able to just tap right into it like that? Yeah, it was weird. And no one played music in my family.

Nobody. It was just like, I just understood note value really young. And I think it was a combination of that. And they just pushed it on me really young. Like, if you're going to do this, learn it right. And then once I learned how to read, it was really, no one really could teach you how to play rock and roll or teach you how to play to your favorite hip hop groups. You know, I had that same teacher that taught me when I was a kid named Ed Will. He just taught me jazz basics, like learn how to read charts. And then I just listened to everything. So after that, it's just whatever is getting you excited

and then playing it over and over and over again and trying to mimic it? Yeah, just listening to what I loved. And some of it would be like programmed drums, a drum machine. It was an SP-1200. It was an MPC, and I would copy those drums from Beastie Boy records or Public Enemy records. that was uh I was just exposed to everything I was a really happily confused kid in a time where in that in that time I think you either listen to punk rock or you listen to hip-hop or you were a goth kid or

you were whatever I was confused and I was so thrilled with being confused and liking everything so southern california right like fontana area and we're talking about like late 1970s yeah i was born in 75 uh-huh right so early 80s maybe yeah then who so so who are your guys like who were the who were the big influences drummersmers? Or just drummers and bands? Drummers and bands? Is that what you said? Yeah. Stuart Copeland, for sure.

Dennis Chambers, he was like a fusion drummer. Right. Steve Gadd, Buddy Rich. A lot of jazz guys, really, for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Carter Bruford. It's interesting with the jazz, right? it makes me think of whiplash yeah when you watch that do you tap into that emotionally like you see yourself in that character at all

oh so many so many so many similarities uh-huh for me it was really when when i was when i joined jazz band in high school my mom had just passed away i was really uh just shut down i really closed myself off from everything and everyone and i just focused on music it was weird just her words resonated with me and i just something told me to just be obsessed with drums like well it's a beautiful gift that she gave you yeah The permission to chase your dream. I mean, what more do you want from a parent, right? Their belief and their conviction that you can do it. It's a beautiful way for her to pass and to sort of bequeath that to you.

And for you to really be able to hear it and take that and run with it yeah especially in a time where you couldn't go i remember going to my counselors i think they start talking to you in 11th grade and they're like well what are you gonna do you're gonna go to college and i was like my dad and my family we don't have money for college and frankly i didn't what did what did uh what'd your do? He worked at Kaiser Steel. He was a steel worker. We didn't have a ton of money. We got by. For me, and I didn't have the grades.

Once my mom died, I was really just getting by. All I was focused on was drums. You're like a skater, stoner kid? What crowd were you hanging in? Not by that time. By the time I think when my mom passed away, I stopped skateboarding. It was kind of like, I really like laser eye focus on drumming. Just something clicked immediately.

And that's all I, that's all I focused on. And when I, I remember having those conversations were like, are you going to go to college? What are you going to major? And I was like, I'm going to be a professional drummer. And they're like, what are you talking about? And I was like, I just want to tour. That's all I want to do.

I don't care if I'm poor. As long as I have enough money to eat and sleep somewhere, that's my only goal. And I almost felt guilty at that point to dream of anything more significant than that. It was just like, do what I love. Somehow find a way to get paid for it, and that's it. And they just counselor after counselor would laugh at me

and just be like, you are an idiot. Yeah. You know? Did you go back to your high school to see any of those guys? No, I've donated some like musical instruments and stuff. I don't think any of the same, you know, faculty is there, but that was almost even more motivation to go harder and just be like, there is, you know, faculty is there, but, uh, but that was almost even more motivation to go harder and just be like, there is, you know, I started to learn, there was no path to get to

where I want to go. I have to create it. And I just, I can't, I can't take, I can't take no for an answer. I just gotta be obsessed. Yeah. You gotta want it. You have to be obsessed. And you know, the, the part, the piece I think that's missing from what you just explained is, is having like an incredible work ethic, you know, which I think is a characteristic of, of, you know, your success. Like you work your ass off, man. You practice like crazy, right? That obsession translated into action. Yeah. And which it was funny, you know, my father wasn't involved with music, but he was a steel worker and there wasn't, even when he got home, you know, my father wasn't involved with music, but he was a steel worker. And there wasn't, even when he got home, he'd be building a fence or he'd build our house

with his own two hands, you know. It was, I saw his work ethic. And it just, I applied it to what I do and what I love. And I still, you know, my friends go like, dude, what are you doing? You work like you're broke. And I'm like, no, I work like I never wanted to go away. And I'm never, even with playing the drums as long as I have, I'm still learning. And I make the choice to still be learning.

How do you keep it fresh though? I mean, it would be very easy to just get soft after all the success and just knowing like, yeah, I can pull it off. Like I don't have to sweat it. I guess being in competition with myself, just being better than I was yesterday. And where does that drive come from? Do you think like that's just innate? Just wanting to be great. Wanting to keep learning, wanting to take it a step further. The days where I'm like, gosh, I don't even know what I'm going to practice today. It never happens. You know, I sit down, I put a metronome on, I put a timer down.

I usually practice for an hour at a time. Sometimes I'll do two to three hours a day and I'll just, you know, something will click and I'll be like, I've never thought of that before. This pattern that I've done a million times, I've never thought about applying it to a different drum or, or maybe some days i'm just working on speed or some days you know you can be right or left-handed with drumming so some days i'll just focus on playing left-handed not because just just just to do it in a case of an emergency

i'll be able to pull it off live and and for me it's like i feel like it's the equivalent of a fighter you train you train you train you train for 9 to 12 weeks before your fight. And then that night, you just have fun. You've done all the work you're supposed to do. I feel like the same way for a tour or just being prepared. I play so much when a gig comes up. And they do come up all the time. Hey, Trav, we want you to play the Grammys with Eminem.

Or we want you to play the Grammys with Pitbull or or with Tom Morello and Chuck D I'm just prepared because I'm playing every day you know yeah yeah yeah it's very much uh sort of an athlete's mindset you know the training is you know the training is the life right and the the event the competition the game whatever is just a celebration of all the work that went into getting you there exactly now and it's just a lot of parallels between drumming and and athleticism too because it is so athletic yeah and for drumming for you yeah for drumming exactly that's the reason i work out like i kind of work out like a madman because i number one i want to be able to go up there and not get tired and i want to be

able to close my eyes and do whatever my mind wants to do and i want my body to be able to react and and and be able to pull it off right so i i just i i feel like practicing all the time and being in shape it's just it just goes hand in hand with two hour sets with blink because it's really it's really an endurance competition out there yeah i would imagine for blink you know right some of the other gigs i get you know like i just played with drum on on uh conan and that's just fun but that comes to just you know being versatile and playing all types of music but when it comes to playing a blink gig or a gig with transplants or goldfinger whoever i'm playing with at the time yeah you know yeah you can't go out there and not practice for four weeks and not train and then go

play a show and think you're gonna have a great show it's not gonna happen you've done a really great job of of kind of sharing that experience on instagram and snapchat with the stories and i mean it's either like you playing live just and you could see like just how incredibly athletic it is. And it's just like, oh, my God, you're just going for it. Or it's you like with the battle ropes working out or it's you with the kids. Right. Yeah. Much like this is what your life is about. That's my life.

And when you're talking about kind of like your work ethic and how you still are so ardent about, you know, practicing the drums every day. Like what an amazing example for your kids, right? It's like your kids are not growing up blue collar, right? So do you, do you worry about like that kind of like that hunger, like that grit that, you know, is a part of your success equation? Like how does that translate into, you know, parenting kids and trying to make sure that they have you know an enthusiasm for something like you do yeah i mean i do worry about that i came from nothing and i was like don't let me get off track here but i was at the time when when i when i graduated from high school

and i had started like i got a tattoo on my leg like one of my first tattoos and my dad said if you ever get a tattoo i'm gonna kick your ass and i'm gonna kick you out of the house so i got one and uh my sister tamra actually ratted me out like i made her upset or something she's like trav has a tattoo and sure enough my dad's like hey pull down your sock i'm like why and he's like i was told you have a tattoo and i was like no no pal and I pull it down of course the tattoo's there so I didn't get whooped and I didn't get kicked out of the house so I figured out like well okay they don't hurt I love tattoos so my you know I just loved the whole

ideas of tattoos so for me it was like my dad was always telling me you dad was always telling me, you have to have a plan B, you have to have a plan B. If you don't have a plan B, you're going to be fucked with, you know, all these job stoppers and everything. And I was like, oh my gosh, I'm going to listen to my pops, but I'm going to flip it on them. If I have tattoos, I can't have a plan B. So it was perfect. For me, it was like, that's it's it and my goal you got to remember was never to have millions of dollars or never to be the most famous person in the world it was never any of that it was just it was really simple i want to play drums and somehow survive like be able to feed yourself yeah i don't care if i live on my friend's couch whatever so the amount of courage it takes to not

have a plan b and just to absolutely go for it and say, I don't care if I'm sleeping on a sleeping bag on, you know, outdoors or on the floor, if I'm eating rice cakes or whatever it is, as long as I get to do what I want to do, or I'm going to commit myself 110% to that. Like there's, there's, that's so powerful and beautiful. Yeah. I feel like if you really want to do something, unless you're 110% sacrificed and ready to sacrifice everything. I didn't have no cool clothes. I didn't have a cool car. I was poor. But I just wanted to play the drums, not for chicks, not for any other reason. But that's what I loved, you know. So back to my kids, you know, I hope, I hope they're seeing that now.

They come home sometimes, they're like, why are you practicing? I'm like, they're asking me if I have a show coming up. I said, no, there's no show. I'm just practicing. They get it. It's like you've got to put in work. It's tons of hard work. So my daughter plays piano and sings.

My son sings and plays drums and raps. He has all sorts of stuff he loves doing. And I'm trying to install that same work ethic in them. And they've seen the grimy side of being on punk rock tours where, you know, we're playing in really crappy venues. And there's, you know, one bathroom you share with the entire crowd, whatever. And then they've hip-hop tours with little wayne and rick ross and and nikki minaj and they've been on you know blink tours that are massive and in arenas all over the world so they've seen everything they've been to the bet awards with me when i'm playing with the hip-hop artists they've been to the grammys they've seen they've seen it all and i'm hoping to just expose it to all of them. But at the end of the day,

if my son comes home and says, Dad, I want to be a whatever. I don't know. I want to work at a library. I'm going to support my son 110%. If my daughter says, I want to be a veterinarian, I'm going to support her 110%. I'm just exposing them to everything while they're young and just seeing what they love. And they both have blood, like music in their blood. It's so natural for them. My son is such a phenomenal drummer, and he doesn't even practice. It's insane. My little girl can sing her butt off and play piano.

I just love seeing it, and I'm just trying to guide them. But they're very aware of where I came from and what I sacrificed to get where I am. And what an incredible education to be able to bring them, you know, on the road and sort of have those kinds of experiences and expose them to all different kinds of people. It's super interesting. But then balancing that against any expectation of entitlement, you know, that comes with that, right? Yeah. It's got to be tough. Yeah, it is.

It's, I mean, parenting in general, there's no guide to parenting, you know, and I'll meet like a hundred, you know, five different parents I know and everyone's so different. It's just, you really, it's just a gamble, you know, trust your gut and guide them and point them in the right direction. You know, I just feel like that's all you can do and lead by example. You know, years ago when I, when I first got sober, this, I was going through a divorce and, and DJ AM actually, who, who passed away. But before, before I'd make any big decisions, he would be like, you need to sober up for four days in order to make a decision.

So I would be sober for those four days. And during that time, we were both going to this therapist because I was trying to be sober and AIM was kind of helping me. But this therapist said, if you die today, would you be the man you'd want your kids to remember you by? And at that point, I wasn't. I was very much like a dumpster and a drug addict. So I was like, oh my gosh. And when he said it to me, it was like, ripped my heart out. You know, I couldn't even like, I was speechless.

You know, I couldn't say anything. And I think that's resonated with me forever. And it's just lead by example. And just know like that's what they're seeing and, and everything I'm doing, it's, they're absorbing like a sponge, you know? Yeah. So I want to talk about the sobriety stuff and, and AM and all of that, but maybe we'll get to it. Like, let's, I want to track back to something you said a minute ago was just this idea of, of trusting your gut and this instinct that you have that you just

wanted to be able to drum and do what you love. When did you know this is it for me? This is what it's going to be? Was it shortly around the time your mom passed? Or was there just a sense of this is it for me? This is what it's going to be there's no there's no plan b all you know guns blazing forward well right before she passed maybe like those last two summers i was skateboarding a lot and the kids in the neighborhood they basically i kind of started to zone in and and and it was kind of i woke up because they in order to skate their half pipe a lot of the older kids in the neighborhood, they'd be like, you can't come skate with us unless you, if you could play the drums, learn Master of Puppets from beginning to end by Metallica.

So I'd be like, oh, easy, whatever, you know? And that was my ticket to go hang out with all the cool kids that were like really, really incredible skateboarders in my neighborhood. So I would learn all these and then halfway through doing this and they'd come over and they'd just come watch me play and I remember playing one time and going like wow they're really tripping like they're really impressed that I can play the drums this is so weird and then they started learning how to play guitar one of them was learning how to play drums and i was like

man i've been doing this since i was four like i'm way better at playing the drums than i am skateboarding and it was just first i was in denial a little bit then and then it just it just hit me and then when mom my mom passed away and said just play the drums just focus on what you love you know don't stop don't let anything stop you that was like then the switch just flipped on it it was just if you had the green light yeah confirmation like you you're realizing like your drumming is allowing you to oddly enough go skate the backyards and pools you want to skate in the neighborhood it was so weird what other you know what else could it do for you?

You know, for you, that was like awesome. But like, imagine what else, what other doors it might open for you. Yeah, it was a trip. And then that was it. Then in high school, I would take out, I was relentless. I would, there was a lot of papers at the time, everything from the recycler to, there was a paper in our community on the Inland Empire called Mean Street and I would put ads out and I would I was into so many different types of music one might say like

uh drummer looking for band influences uh Fugazi, Pitchfork, Drive Like Jehu then the other one would be like uh drummer looking for band influences Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, and whatever. And then another one, drummer looking for band, Descendants, Minor Threat, and, you know, whatever. You're like all over the place. So that started because you're still like that, right? Yeah. So you were never, like, I would have thought, if I didn't know better, like, oh, you just, you know, you're thinking about like Cro-Mags, Minor Threat, Black Flag. Like I could see you coming up from that kind of vein.

Yeah. But being super focused on like hardcore punk. But it was jazz. It was, you know, it was rap at the time. It was all different kinds of music. Yeah, it was everything. I figured like, hey, if I'm going to put my cards on the table, let me put them all out and see what comes back. So my dad would be like, Travis, someone's on the phone for you.

And it would be like every five minutes. And he would be so irritated. He'd be like, what did you do? How did everyone get this number? And I mean, it was everything from those papers to local music shops. I just wanted to play with people. Right. So it wasn't about getting a band together. It was about, i'm just gonna play in 20 bands we'll eventually get a band

together but there's something weird you know like if if you were just a great guitar virtuoso and you could just play guitar like no one's business but you didn't know how to play with people it's a problem and you can't teach somebody that it's you know and there was no bands like there was no now they have like these cool rock star programs at schools and stuff it's incredible but for me it was like i want to learn how to play with people i want to learn how to like there's a lot that goes into it it's like you start learning how to like write your drum parts in your head with whatever songs you're creating with whatever musicians you're playing with. So I would have people, you know, from Texas coming to see me.

I would have whole bands, you know, auditioning me for whatever. And I did that till I just found cool local bands to play with. Yeah, super interesting. I mean, that's sort of the underappreciated sort of skill of becoming a successful musician right being able to work with people i mean you know it's no mystery most bands fail because no people can't get along with each other right yeah and i know 182 has had its ups and downs with that like every other band yeah i would imagine but being able to have like a uh you have an aptitude for communication and understanding and compassion with the people that you're playing with is crucial, right? Yeah, it's part of it. I mean, being in a band is like you're having a relationship.

It's almost like having a girlfriend. And I believe there's relationship maintenance you have to do with the people in the band. You have to obviously be collaborative in the writing process. And there is people I know that are great musicians that I've come in contact with over the years that I've played. And they can't hold on to gigs because they are hard to work with or they're unnegotiable or just, you know, hard headed. they're unnegotiable or just, you know, hardheaded. And it's just people dealing with people and being able to work with people as a whole other skill, along with playing your instrument, along with, you know what I mean? Everything else is part of. So what is it if you had to articulate like how you flow with that? Like, what is it about for you? Like, is it about collaboration? Is it about being flexible? Like how do you navigate

the, you know, the sort of personalities that you come in contact with the people that you collaborate with? It's just knowing how to deal with people. I don't even think it involves music at that point. It's just like, how do you, do you have patience? You know what I mean? I have kids. I have the, I have the, my son asked me the other day, he's like, how do you do it? And I was like, son, I've had, you know, three kids. I've raised three of you guys. I know I have patience. Dad knows how to, I'm very patient. Whereas like some people that might not have kids that are 39 or 40 years old that are

playing in a band, maybe have zero patience or have zero, you know, ways to tolerate certain things. Whereas I'm like, okay okay this is how we work through this you know and you know i guess i learned i wasn't always like that i think i learned it through businesses that i started through of course other others that led by example that i looked up to um all that you know it's it's the immediately when i got in the game and i started touring i was quiet and I listened a lot and learned. Right. So when does the first band kind of come together for you that gets a little bit

of traction? In high school, I was playing in a band called Poor Mouth that would play like every party. And it was like, it was kind of awesome. Like we killed it, but it was very short lived out there. There wasn't much going on. Like for me, I didn't know how I was ever going to get out of Fontana. Right. So that's like Inland Empire, right? Yeah.

And I kind of, I kind of bounced around from Fontana to Riverside to Corona. I was kind of everywhere. There was a pivotal moment where, you know where I'd played in every local band, and my dad was telling me, he's like, look, you're out of high school now. You just graduated. You need to pay rent, and you need to work 60 hours a week, or you can't be here.

And of course, I didn't want to disappoint my dad. So I went, and I kicked butt at the job I was at, and I finally got of course I didn't want to disappoint my dad so I went and I kicked butt at the job I was at and I finally got in at the warehouse the shipping and receiving center and I got the job it was 60 hours a week I couldn't believe it I was making more than 4.25 an hour it was the most I thought my life was made you know at that time that was a lot of money for me I think I was going to make I think I was going to start at $4.75 or $5 an hour, right, which was awesome, and then I just joined this band named Feeble, with a lot of guys who, ironically enough, grew up in Fontana, that moved to Laguna Beach, and I called everyone one day, I was like, I don't know if, I don't know

if I'm gonna be able to join the band anymore, man think I'm just gonna stay here and maybe not play drums as much right now because my dad said I have to work 60 hours a week and I need to pay rent and I don't want to disappoint him and the singer of that band Noel Paris said Trav I think you're making a really bad decision I think that you are extremely talented and you have a gift and you'll look back on this and you'll regret it. And if you don't take this opportunity, you'll look back and you won't be able to get this opportunity again, but you would be able to get another job working 60 hours a week. So please hear me out and please listen to me. working 60 hours a week so please hear me out and please listen to me uh you're too good to waste your life working at target so i said screw it and i said dad i'm i'm i listen to you and i'm

leaving i'm gonna go sleep on my buddy's couch and i'm gonna play in a band and be he got me a job being a trash man in laguna and i'm gonna to play drums. So he helped hook you up with a gig, though. So it wasn't like he was pissed. He was like, all right, that's the choice he's making. And I'm going to get behind it. Like, what was his reaction to you? Who, Pops? Yeah.

Well, he kind of gave me an ultimatum. It was either, you know, get a life. Get with my program or you're on your own type program. Yeah, he basically said, in not so many words, stop playing drums in the garage with your friends. Yeah, he basically said, in not so many words, stop playing drums in the garage with your friends. Get a 60-hour job, a week job, or get out of here. Nicely, because you need to be a man.

He said, a man doesn't stay here and live off his pops. I love you, but you've got to do that. And then luckily, Noel just said, man, I really see something in you, I could really feel this and you've got to listen to me. And I just said, screw it, I'm going to do it. And I went out there and I just played in their band. And sure enough, Noel was right. I played in their band. I played in this local Soka band that would play at Hennessy's, like this bar over there. And Feeble, we were all trash men. We were all Laguna Beach city workers. Yeah, that's awesome. And we would, daytime, we would be cleaning up trash, doing city work.

Nighttime, we'd be playing a show every night or practicing. And then, sure enough, that led to the Aquabats playing with us and seeing me and the bass player, Chad Larson, calling me and going, dude, our drummer isn't going to be able to play these shows or he quit the band. We need a drummer tomorrow. We're playing with Fishbone at the Glass House. Wow. And I was like, duh, I'm there.

You know, and he's like, gave me a CD. So this was like late 80s, mid 80s at this point? No, this was like 90s. This is 95 or 96. So Fishbone hit its peak like around late 80s, right? Like they were pretty good there. Yeah, they were still jamming. I mean, they were selling out like the glass house.

Right. Like 2,000, 3,000 people. So that's a big step up. Oh, huge. I mean, we went from, you people. So that's a big step up. Oh, huge. I mean, we went from, you know, I was playing local bars, some of them twice the size of this with Feeble. And we just, you know, we were such a good band, but we weren't connected in the music industry.

We were a really great band, but we weren't playing big venues. And then the Aquabats, it hit me up. And I played that show, and they were just like, you're our drummer man and I didn't know they dressed up for anything I just showed up there with some drumsticks I had heard the album the night before and then it was the hardest thing for me but I had to I had to tell you know because Aquabats had a tour I was touring now my dream was coming true and I had to go and tell my one of my best friends like a brother to me Noel and the rest of the guys in Feeble, who ultimately directed me and guided me to be out there and follow my dreams, that I'm now leaving their band because I got an opportunity to tour with the Aquabats.

That's a tough conversation. It was terrible. It was terrible. What did Noel say? I mean, I think he was upset. I think everyone was upset and i think i think everyone was upset i think i think all of them would have probably done what i did because they they were they wanted the dream so bad just like i did ironically like i said they were from fontana there's not no one

comes out of fontana no one's doing anything like i think they were i think they were on one hand very proud of me and the other hand like oh man i can't believe this are those guys still playing music yeah i still talk to him oh that's good yeah yeah we're still friends no i mean when i wrote my book noel actually contributed to my book and uh and i called him many of times and just thanked him right you know that's cool so you're so suddenly i mean how what is the time period from getting the getting the gig as a trash man in laguna to getting the tour it was probably about a year a year and a half yeah so you you so you paid your dues during that year right oh yeah right you were telling me the other day about like how you would uh the hari krishnas would

give you food yeah uh-huh yeah i would just skate you know i didn't have a car you know which goes back to what we were talking about earlier you sacrifice everything i had no car all i have was a skateboard to my name but there was there was some days all in man yeah you know there was some days i didn't have much money and harry krishnas would give us and they would have you know food like a little buffet for whoever i whoever. I don't know what it was for. It was probably just for them, but we made friends with the guys from Shelter and a couple other people there, so we would eat.

It was awesome. Yeah. So you go on tour with Aquabats, and then you guys get signed and do an album, right? Yeah, we got signed to actually Paul Tillett. There was a lot of offers on the table from different people, and Paul Tillett let who who owns golden voice signed the aquabats basically created a record label to sign the aquabats

wow it was awesome um and bill fold at the time was my manager who who at the time where i grew up in riverside and fontana he had a place called the barn which had the best shows ever like all the great bands would go through there you know your dream if you came from where i came from was to play the barn or spankies or any of those punk rock clubs out there so yeah we we we wrote and and recorded an album it came out on golden voice paul to let and and we were off we were off running We were off running, man. We had songs on K-Rock. We filmed music videos.

It was a trip. Right. So you've already exceeded your wildest imagination for where you thought you would go, right? Mm-hmm. And then what happens? You guys end up opening for Blink-182. Is that how it goes down? Is that the next?

Yeah, I toured with them for maybe two years, recorded two albums with them, and we are on Snowcore with Blink-182, which was like Primus, The Alcoholics, Blink, Aquabats. Who else was on there? I feel like someone else popped on and off that tour. But we did that tour with them. And at the end of that tour, Aquabats were a great support act for Blink,

meaning we'd play right before Blink every night. And kind of oddly enough, man, the same thing happens. I'm in the Aquabats, and Blink's drummer leaves. They have a falling out like 40 minutes before their show. And Aquabats are about to play and they're like, dude, our drummer just left. I think he quit. Can you learn 20 songs in like 40 minutes? And I was like, sure.

20 songs in 40 minutes. Yeah. And luckily, like some nights you it just happens naturally too you go out you know you go out and you watch the bands before you or after you just to support and kind of check it out so i'd kind of seen some of the stuff but i wasn't listening to it with the ear that oh i'm gonna have to play this i was just like oh this is cool whatever they were fun to watch. They were really funny. And Mark and Tom were really loud and kind of ignorant

and just, you know, like a fun, fun, fun band. And that day, we just got in the dressing room. I said, Tom, just play me all the songs on guitar. I just need to see how you're picking and what the rhythms are. And 40 minutes later, hopped on stage played our first show see that's crazy that's insane so it wasn't about mimicking every single drum stroke so that you could be you know exactly the same as the drummer who preceded you but it was about finding your own way to play these songs yeah uh-huh yeah and then i played able to tap into that in just 45

minutes for 20 so i mean that's that goes back to like the past life thing then I played able to tap into that in just 45 minutes for 20. So I mean, that's that goes back to like the past life thing, like you being able to learn music, you know, sheet music at age four or five, like the fact that you could channel that like so intuitively is pretty amazing. Yeah, it was awesome, man. It was and me for me, I was having so much fun. I was like, playing two sets a night. So I did it for like the next four or five shows. And after the first one, they said, we want you to be our drummer. And I said, well, I think you have a drummer.

He just left though. You know, it's kind of like a girl. You meet a girl and she's like nuts about you. Like, oh my gosh. And then you're like, you have a boyfriend. Like hit me when you don't have a boyfriend. It was kind of that same scenario. I told him, I was like, well,

if things don't work out with your drummer, he doesn come back obviously i'd love to play with you and they were you know we've never sounded better we love this and we got home from tour the shows were over and and they said you know what we're gonna call you in a week and let you know what's up call me in a week they say you got a show tomorrow night 6 p.m be there and it was just it was just green light yeah it was like that was it and then you gotta you have to go back to the aquabats and have that same conversation same thing yes we were we were actually doing what's called grad night at disneyland where they would have i think no doubt did it the year before and ska was so popular then you know was that Was that, was like the No Doubt phenomenon spilling over into Fontana? It was kind of happening a little bit before you, right?

Or around the same time? Because it was, you know, they're Orange County, so not too far away. Yeah, ska punk and punk rock was just everywhere, you know. So we would play with No Doubt, you know. Aquabats would open for them. We did grad night the year after them so those were my last shows and I remember I had to tell them same thing like hey yeah it was just so weird man every time I felt guilty I don't know I don't know if I should have

felt guilty but I did and uh and you just like I said the people you play with they become your brothers it was just it become like a family and and it was hard i remember you know us bawling the last day i told them you know i it's i'm i'm gonna go play with blink and they just couldn't believe it you know yeah and for for me it was like man am i am i a jerk you know what i mean like you're a climber yeah my climber am i like what am i what am i supposed to do and i and i just saw you know aquabats had like nine people in the band we were in like a 10 passenger van sometimes there was 13 people in a 10 passenger van just it was just it was it was rough and and uh and it just it just seemed like the right thing to do yeah just trusted my gut how those guys doing now what are they doing

great we're still great friends that's good and christian contributed to my my book can i say it was really cool christian contributed to it and so so did Noel and the guys from Feeble. So having both of them, I told them, meant so much to me. And I let them tell their story. They were honest. Christian says, I was pissed. I couldn't believe it. And even I learned stuff about myself just from their interviews in my book,

which was cool. Yeah, it's almost like it's on there. Because I didn't do that. You know, I didn't interview people for my book. I had Gavin Edwards, who I co-wrote the book with. He would do these interviews and he would say, we're keeping everything in there. And I'd be like, oh, my gosh. Everyone else's perspective on you.

And I'd be like. Your decisions. So some people might not be. You know, I remember like Christian said, like he kind of talked bad about Blink. And I was like, should I put that in there? his perspective on you and i'd be like your decisions so some people might not be you know i remember like christian said like he kind of talked bad about blink and i was like should i put that in there that's kind of i don't know he's like everything stays in there you've got to be brutally honest and you know christian even said like you know i felt like travis was so good when he was in our band he he was like the michael jordan of drumming and sometimes he wouldn't

listen to me and he would play songs faster than I wanted him to play them. But I never heard those things when I was in the band. So it was like I really listened when I read it in my book. And I was like, wow, I never realized I was being like that or I never, you know what I mean? Or I never realized you viewed me like that or whatever it was. That's compelling though. That makes for a compelling memoir because you're getting the truth. You know what I mean? And that's what you really want out of a memoir.

Too many memoirs are glossy, whitewashed, you know, sort of best of versions of somebody's life, you know, and it's not honest. And I was so happy I did that. There's a couple things, you know, I was brutally honest about a lot. about a lot. And the day after it came out, the day it came out, it was, I remember being really emotional because I was just going like, oh my gosh, everything I shared, I'm almost having to relive again because I'm doing press for the book. And I found out I wasn't prepared for it just to talk about certain things. I was still very emotional about it. So it was like, oh, it was draining, man. I was so, it was just crazy. But then a couple of days after the book came out, I'm like, I'm so glad I was honest because I can't go back and go, I didn't say this and I wanted to in my book. It's like, I pretty much said it all

besides things that I was legally not allowed to say. Yeah. It's cathartic, you know, but it's a very vulnerable feeling. Like I experienced my version of that,ic, you know, but it's a very vulnerable feeling. Like I experienced my version of that, uh, you know, when my book came out and knowing that I'd been honest about stuff that I wasn't proud of, you know, and, and, and only being able to write that by sort of pretending or imagining that I was writing in a journal, no one was ever going to read. And then realizing like, oh man, this is like out there you know and you know i don't have you know i have like one one thousandth the profile that you have so to know that like mainstream america like all knows that all this stuff about your life is a is a is an

inexplicably vulnerable feeling right yeah i can't imagine i can't imagine what that must have been like yeah it was a trip but it's like but you're clear right you're clear you know what i mean i really felt a huge weight lifted off my shoulders and just i can put i can move on now right now so blink blows up and i would imagine that kind of changes the the tenor of your life right yeah i mean that just was must have been an insane time. I came home and I told my pops, I was just filling in for Blink

and I was like, dad, I made like, I have $3,000 right now. And he's like, you better hold on to it because you're never going to get it again. And I was like, thanks, dad. I was like, thanks a lot. He's like, I'm serious, Trav. You don't know when you're going to make it again.

And then that was before I, you was before they called me the week later. And then I started going on tour. And I remember my pops, we came from lower middle class family. And he didn't have a running car. He had this old Cadillac in the back of his backyard that I would hose off for him and wash. But it didn't run. So my first paycheck, I came and I bought him a Cadillac in the back of his backyard that, that I would like hose off for him and wash, but it didn't run. So my first paycheck,

I came and I bought him a Cadillac and I just, it was just a trip. You know, I could like, I went, I, the first things I did was helped out my dad and my sisters made sure they were cool.

And then, how many sisters do you have? Two. Two. Yeah. What are they doing now? Um, one works at my print shop and the other one works at my clothing company. Cool. Famous. Yeah. Yeah. Nice man. Yeah. That, yeah. What are they doing now? One works at my print shop, and the other one works at my clothing company.

Cool. Famous? Yeah. Yeah, nice, man. Yeah. That's cool, taking care of your family. But I would imagine, like, suddenly, you know, it's Bling City, right? Yeah, it's going.

Because even Bling at that time, we were still playing small clubs. We were playing clubs across America and Europe. Our first tour in Europe was in a van it was still very much it was kind of picking up right we're a little bit bigger than aquabats you know and and then we recorded our album the first album i recorded with them was called enema of the state and we just blew up blew up and it was just insane did you see that like when you made the decision to to move over to blank like did you see that potential on the horizon like did you have the idea like this this band's gonna go further and bigger and broader yeah well because at the time aquababats, they still are. They're very much, I guess, focused on children. And there are a lot of good qualities about them.

No cussing. They're all Mormon. So it all fits into what they can and can't do. But their end goal, what really cried out to me, was their end goal was to have a television show, have a cartoon. And my end goal was to play in a rock have a cartoon and my end goal was to play in a rock band or a punk rock band goals yeah yeah so i didn't uh you know being in the aquabats if i just put it down on paper it'd have been like okay i'm gonna play drums in a band that i love

like interesting music really cool new wave ska great guys but at the end of the day christian really wanted it to be a TV show. And for me, I was like, I don't know if I want to be an actor or whatever. I was like, I really just want to play the drums and play fast and fun. And it was a three-piece, so it was very minimal and fun. And I knew who Blink was. I had listened to some of their albums and it just made a lot of sense.

So NM of the State blows up. And at this time, MTV is still pretty relevant, right? Yeah. And you're all over that. We're on TRL. We're number one on the countdowns. There's people sleeping outside of my gate at my house. Wow.

In Corona where i had just moved and i had no idea i was i i needed to move out just because i there was no privacy there there was people trying to break in my house there was like stalkers there was girls trying to handcuff themselves to me after shows there was there was a lot of strange things going on that i was just like are you serious like how did you manage that like did you manage it well or were you just in for the ride or like how did that go down for you i was in for the ride but i was in a little bit of disbelief because we didn't really you know we were just we were a pop punk band right you know it was goofy

yeah who loved the descendants and and all and Black Flag and whatever, all these bad religions, all these bands we just grew up on. And then all of a sudden, you know, a network like MTV gets behind you and is just saying, you have the number one video in the world. People from our genre of music weren't ready for that. We didn't know what to do. We didn't even know what that was. We were like, it was insane. But, insane but yeah i mean we figured it out you know obviously with with the success shows got bigger we were playing arenas now you know making million dollar videos at the time

a record label at the time was like you're at the point of your career where you need to make a million dollar video. Can you believe that? That's insane. A million dollars on a video. I know. Oh, my gosh, man. It was just. Do they ever do that anymore?

No. Yeah. No. I mean, they've figured it out. Like, you do not need a million dollars for a video. But, you know, we had like the guy Samuel Bayer who did like Smells Like Teen Spirit. He was the guy. Yeah.

And we're traveling around in private jets. It's just playing two or three shows a day sometimes. It was insane. And are you happy? Are you like, I'm living the dream? This is awesome? Or how is this landing for you? Oh, yeah.

It was just more of like, I was foggy. I couldn't believe it. It was just, i'm just along for the ride i'm just cruising you know rolling with the punches like whatever whatever they spring on me i'm going okay i'm down whatever you know we want you to play on top of the whatever empire state building okay we then you're going over to trl and then you're going to go play uh madison square garden and i'm like i don't even know what madison square garden is you're gonna play this show called saturday night live i don't even know what Madison Square Garden is. You're going to play this show called Saturday Night Live.

I don't know what Saturday Night Live is. I had no clue. I always say one of the funniest things, we played Saturday Night Live. I didn't know how insanely special it is to play Saturday Night Live. I had no clue. It was just another TV show. How did you not know that, though? I just didn't grow up watching.

How old were you at the time? Like 25 or something? Yeah, probably. I just didn't grow up watching. How old were you at the time? Like 25 or something? Yeah, probably. But I didn't grow up watching TV. I grew up skateboarding, watching skate videos, listening to punk rock, and trying to mimic Mike D from the Beastie Boys. I was not watching late night television. I just didn't even...

I knew who Jay Leno was because my dad was such a big car guy. Like, loved cars. But yeah, it was a trip. Wow. So what was the most surreal thing that happened during that era? Just the massive tours, just going to, I mean, you take a band that was playing 2,000 to 3,000 seaters, and after Enema of the State, we wrote this incredible album,

and we're out playing to 10,000 to 30,000 people a night all summer long. And it was just the only time it stopped is when we begged for it to stop. Just don't book shows for a month or two. We were so over, I mean, I don't call it overworked because we get to do what we love. But there comes a point, and I always say this, there comes a point when you're on the road, your management's back home, and they just keep booking shows. And there is a such thing. You're in the cash register. Yeah, there is a such thing as sanity, you know.

There's no such thing as sanity, you know? And ultimately, like, that led to me doing a lot of drugs, was just no one saying, hey, is everything cool out there? Like, do you guys need to come up for air? We were touring, like, nine months, ten months out of the year. Yeah. It was insane. So sometimes we'd get home, and Mark, Tom, and I would get on the phone,

and they're like, who's going to say they're sick? And I'd be like, I'm sick. And he's like, yeah, man, I don't think we could do the first week of this tour. We're going to have to postpone the first week of this tour. That's crazy because you guys are like 25. Your veins are coursing with testosterone. If you guys can't manage it, nobody can. Yeah, I think it was just insane. At the time, you're away from your families.

There comes this cold time, eight months into touring, where you haven't been home, you haven't seen your family and you haven't had a break where you're just like, I need a minute. Yeah. Just real quick. Give me a minute. Give me one day off. Give me two days off and we're cool. You know? But yeah, I think, you know, it was, it was just insane.

It was awesome. So the drugs start creeping in a little bit? Like, what are you doing? Like, smoking a little pot? Like, do the painkillers come in? Or is that only after, like, the injury? Well, for me, I started smoking cigarettes for whatever reason while I was out there. And I didn't like to fly.

I was out there and, and, uh, and I didn't like to fly when I was 19 and I was in feeble and I was a trash man. I got drunk for the first time. And I told my manager, um, I'm going to die in a plane crash. And he was like, what are you talking about? You've never even had enough money to fly in your life. And I was like, you're right. I haven't, I've never, I've only flown once in my life. And it was the scariest thing in the world. But cried to him after being like having like too much alcohol for the first time and said I'm gonna die in a plane crash it was the weirdest thing so that is a trip yeah and I didn't know note to self I did not know that until he did his interview for my book and he reminds me that I said that and I was like oh my gosh I did did say that. That's so scary to me. So fast forward to Blink, we're flying four, three times a day sometimes.

We're knocking out a show in the morning, a Today Show, whatever, a morning show for the news. An early festival time slot at one festival. And then at night playing our own show. So we're flying all the time. And that's when... So is there some anxiety rationing it up oh yeah and i think tom was honestly i think tom was the first one he was like here's a norco like these will this will like calm you down if you get stressed or whatever on flights and i'd always be white knuckling and they'd be like dude it's fine it's just the landing

gear going up and they would always tease me but flying flying, I think the one time I flew at a young age, I saw my mom and she was bawling the entire time on the flight because she was so scared. And I think that maybe had something to do with how I felt about flying. So I'd be white knuckling every time we'd fly and we'd be on these small planes. Sometimes it'd be a private jet. Sometimes we'd fly commercial. We just never knew. It was just in Europe, the planes were old. It was just, it was something I really learned to hate. I just did not like flying. Anything I could do to forget I was on an airplane. So it led to me taking handfuls of, of Norcos and Vicodin and Valium, which later led to like Oxycontin. Right.

Tons of weed. And then Sherm, PCP, weed laced with PCP. It was just anything to not realize I was on a plane again. Right. It's interesting that it all germinates from that, right? Like that fear. And, and again, like, I can't get, I can't get past like this. It's, it really does feel like this weird past life thing, like this knowing that you had, like you're supposed to avoid airplanes,

you know? Yeah. Like just this intuition that you had about it. And every time you got on a plane, knowing that that was a cross purposes with what your inner self was telling you. Yeah, I mean, everyone, I mean, if A.M. was still here, he would say, Travis was a mess on airplanes. You know, Mark and Tom, you know, the worst flyer ever.

You know, they would just point at me and laugh because I just, I mean, I wouldn't be screaming, but you could just look at my face. I'd stay up the whole time just waiting you know well can we talk about the the plane crash yeah of course you're okay with that I mean you know it's well documented and everything like that but you know it's quite you know it was quite the tragic encounter I just I can't imagine you know it's well documented and everything like that but you know it's quite you know it was quite the tragic encounter i just i can't imagine you know what that must have been like trying to

you know overcome that but maybe you know walk us through exactly what happened um so dj am and i there was a point where Mark and Tom and I, it was lots of touring, like I had said. I think it had taken its toll on everybody. And blink, Tom, just basically Tom one day just said, I'm done. He couldn't do it no more. It was like there was miscommunication with management. And some of us wanted to tour all the time. And he wanted to stay home a lot.

It was just, it was a mess. So Blink breaks up. About four months later, Transplants, my other band, breaks up. And I'm like, what am I going to do? I'm so used to being a busybody. I'm used to doing everything, everywhere. So I meet DJ AM, and he's a great DJ that plays everything. Everything.

He plays things people wouldn't dare have the balls to play in a club, and he just makes it iller than anyone could ever imagine. So we connect, and I tell him, like, And he just makes it iller than anyone could ever imagine, you know? So we connect. And I tell him, like, yo, I have this idea where it's drummer, DJ. I don't know. And, you know, I'm not doing anything right now. My bands are on time off right now.

We should jam. And he's like, oh, I'd love to. We start jamming. The first time we jam, we jam for like 10 hours 10 hours and it was just he was like a guitar player throwing every genre of music at me the beatles throwing uh whatever you know ghetto boys throwing uh you know daft punk everything you know it was magic i mean he was so innovative and what he was doing way ahead of the curve yeah way ahead of his time. So long story short, we developed this routine that was like, to me, was really innovative. No one was doing it. It was mind blowing, man. We were on to something. We were playing like K-Rock weenie roast. We were playing all the venues and gigs my bands were playing back in the day. A week before our plane crashed, we're the house band for MTV Music Awards. You know, It was ill. It was the best time ever. So we had gigs.

I was gigging just as much with AM as I was Blink. Big shows, too. It was just him and I. It was crazy. So it was one of those days where we had a show. It was for T-Mobile. And they would pay us big money to go and play these shows. And it was in South Carolina.

And remember before we left, I was like, I don't really need to go. It's summer. And my baby's mama, Shana, at the time, we weren't together. But she was like, don't go then. Like, if you don't have to go, you don't need the money. It's like, why are you doing it? And I was like, I'm doing it because I love playing with Adam and I think Adam was going through the same thing like we don't have to go but it was just one of those things it's booked let's honor what we committed to so we flew out to South Carolina wasn't uh wasn't Shanna gonna

come with you yeah Shanna was gonna come my kids were bawling, man. It was like, it was the weirdest thing. My kids were bawling. My little girl, Alabama, was saying, she's freaking the whole time. She's never done this. She's crying, saying the roof's going to come off. And I'm like, what are you talking about, Bama? And she's a baby at the time. And she's just, the kids are crying, not normal. Like, weird, you know?

That is so trippy. And yeah, like I said, my my gut this is one of the big examples of where i was like my gut told me not to go so i ended up going and she was gonna go with us but she's like no i shouldn't go just in case god forbid something was to happen we'd both be in that plane so we go and uh the flight out there is cool i take my assistant little chris and uh and our we just had a big homie named Che who was like our good friend. And he was like, he was playing college football. I basically, Chris and I were like, dude, instead of hiring security for now, we should just take Che with us.

Che's going to be security for now on. Cause it's, it's good having friends on tour with you too. And Che's big and, you know, intimidating. Che's never been on a private plane uh you know we go out there on a g4 everything's cool we play our show and then after the show um we had a flight booked for tomorrow everything was everything was set up but uh am's like oh I want to get back tonight like you know what are we going to do south carolina you know and then chris had just had his son sebastian who's my godson he's like yeah man we should just go home trav um and i was like well we have a flight book tomorrow don't trip let's just chill here you guys but it's like majority rules anywhere we go if i get outvoted i'm rolling with the punches you know and everyone

was like people skills people skills. Yeah. So I took one for the team. I said, okay, whatever, man. Let's book the flight, whatever. So booking flights like this, usually, like the flight out there, it's like I speak to a manager, and I say, who's the pilot? What's the plane? What's the history?

Is everything cool? Oh, wow. So you're getting into it. Oh, I'm really i'm terrified of flying so and ironically enough the the flight out there was cake a piece of cake man we knew who the pilot was he was super cool he knew i was a little bit weird about flying you know um great flight though on the way back you gotta think man we just got off stage it's 9 30 10 o'clock and we make the phone call get us a plane so the plane is booked in an hour's time no there's no one dotting the i's

or crossing the t's it's like yo you guys want a plane i'm gonna do everything i can do to get this plane there so the plane gets there and so implying that like shortcuts were made on the checklist or i know my checklist wasn't done you know because gus who was our tour manager for blink you know usually there was like a you know there's a little checklist that goes and i know that checklist wasn't going to happen it was an hour's time and lv's like dude it's not going to be the greatest plane but i'll get it once again rolling with the punches you know whatever for the team so we get there we pull up to the airport and it's like private airport and there's all these jets and then there's this fucking leer over all by

itself and i was like oh cold as ice tell me that is not our plane and sure enough the driver drives up to that plane and i'm just looking at it no you know bad bad feeling man bad feeling my gut's saying no it to the point where i actually call my dad who at the time now i say i love you every time i speak to him he's like 75 but growing up he's a vietnam vet he's tough, man. Tough, tough dad, you know? And I know he loved me, but we wouldn't say I love you or be gushy, you know? It was like more tough love. Not a hugger. Yeah, for him and I.

So I call him, and I'm like, I'm bawling at this point. I say, Dad, like, I have a really bad feeling about you. You were crying before you even got on the plane. I'm crying. And my dad's like, what the fuck is wrong with you, Trav? Why are you crying? And I said, dad, I don't know. I have a horrible feeling.

If something happens, pal, just do whatever you can to make sure the kids are cool. Because I have a horrible feeling. And he's like, well, you're going to be fine. And I take a picture of the plane. I send it to like, I think I sent it to my pops I sent it to my boy Rob that's in the transplants with me weird enough Chris does the same thing I don't know that he does this but he sends a a picture of him in front of the plane to his wife um we get in the flight there's like a really young a really young pilot. And it kind of, like, eased off some of the pressure because she was really young.

And I was like, wow, you look really young. I was like, you fly the plane? She's like, yeah, I'm, like, getting my hours up or whatever. You know, she's basically, you know, she's with, like, an OG captain that's, you know, flying with her, you know, teaching her. So we get in there and she's basically like okay well there's no room for a stewardess in this plane so i'll be up in the cockpit if you guys need anything you know just come knock on the door whatever so we get in the flight and i'm fucking baked man i've smoked so much weed and i've taken so many pills it's my normal concoction to get on the flight you know

especially this one i'm going heavy you know um we get on everyone's like there's actually a video man i have the video of it am back in the day there was these flip cams i don't know if you remember they were like the coolest thing before every phone had one and he's on the flight and he's like what do you know about a uh drummer a dj and a pj like you know like kind of like kind of flexing a little bit. We're on a private jet, whatever, trying to have fun. And Chris is like, you know, what's up, Chris? Whatever.

We're just goofing off, like, you know, thinking we're just living in the lap of luxury on a private flight home. Everyone else is. I'm scared to death already, you know? So Chris falls asleep. Che falls asleep che falls asleep we're still on the runway and i'm like wide awake man i'm just sitting there adam's sleeping we go up and down the runway we're going the wrong way and they turn around the runway yeah like so right

out they're like sorry yeah we're uh sorry we went down the wrong runway. And then I was like, oh my gosh, man, what the hell, you know? And then I'm kind of like dozing off. And then finally, you know, you feel like the engines start up again. And we go to take off and our landing gear, like the tire, basically, our tires explode. Sounds like gunshots, you know? Not very many people will know what it sounds like when your tires explode on your plane so it sounded like someone's shooting at the plane multiple tires yeah like it'd be like if one went out yeah it sounded like someone was you know like throwing rounds you know so i hear, these loud bangs. And then the plane is like skidding on the runway.

So we have no tires. So now it's landing gear against the runway. And then smoke just starts filling the cabin and fire immediately. Cause the friction from the landing gear on the runway. And then we go up in the air and then you have lift off. Yeah. And then we go up in the air. And then... Ah, you have liftoff. Yeah. And then we lift off.

Are you hearing from the captain from the cockpit at all? No, I'm just screaming because I feel like I know something's wrong. Once the bang bang happened, the plane kind of got out of control. Then we were up in the air. So I'm screaming, man. And it's just black in the plane and smoke everywhere. And then the plane is basically going up high. And then it's dipping down and then going up and then dipping down.

And then it started getting lower and hitting the cement going up and down. Bouncing. Yeah, bouncing off the cement. And I'm screaming, man. I'm screaming. But obviously, they have their hands full in the cockpit. Who knows what's going on? And then we go. And by this time, there's fire everywhere. And I'm looking at fire. No longer smoke. It's fire. And we swoop up. I think we swoop up and down like five or six times. And then the last time

we go really high in the air, it almost felt like we were almost like going vertical. And then all of a sudden the plane swoops down and we hit an embankment. And we stop. And I'm somehow alive. You know, every time I'm just bracing myself because I'm looking out the window.

I'm wide awake. I'm numb. I'm on so many painkillers and whatever else. So I'm seeing a swoop down so i can kind of like brace myself every time we hit finally we hit and i'm on fire you know there's literally i'm on fire yeah like my my hands are on fire um i'm trying to move forward to see if i can get to chris or chay there's four of you in the cabin? Yeah. And then my whole everything catches fire.

My shirt catches fire. And then I turn to my left, and A.M.'s knocked out, and I grab him and I shake him. He wakes up. I can't get to Chris or Che. It's just a wall of fire. I can't see anything. So I open the emergency exit, which I always, I forgot to say,

but I always sit next to an emergency exit in any plane. I sit, I kick open the emergency exit. I jump out, and I land in the jet. So I land in the jet, which if anyone knows about planes. Like in the jet stream behind the engine. Yeah, which is filled with fuel. Right. So my whole body catches fire. I jump into a basically a pool of jet fuel.

My whole body catches fire. AM jumps out over the jet. He's not on fire. And he's basically on the phone. I'm running and he's screaming. He's on the phone with our manager going our plane crashed he's like crying screaming he's like travis on fire so i'm just running and at this time the embankment was right next to a freeway so i have cars that are watching

me run on fire and i'm just stripping off my clothes my gut tells me to strip off my clothes i don't know what else to do i don't you't in the middle of the road this at this point yeah they're coming in both directions yeah the cars are like facing us and there's no one on our side because everyone sees the plane there and um and I don't realize my skin is soaked in jet fuel so it doesn't matter what I take off so I get to the point where I'm butt naked and I'm just running, but my whole body's on fire. And then I just hear one guy, man, like I don't even know where he was. I know he's off to the left of me that just says like what you learn in elementary school, like stop, drop and roll.

Drop and roll, yeah. And sure enough, man. Like yelling from a car? Yeah, yelling from a car. And I just lay down and I start rolling. And then Adam comes out, DJ AM, and he gets his shirt and he starts patting me out. And that's how he got burnt a little bit.

He got a little burn on his arm and on his neck. But basically, after a couple minutes, he pats me out. And then as he pats me out, the plane explodes. And you're the only two guys who made it out. Yeah. Yeah, we're the only two guys. I mean, later we found out Chris and Che, my assistant and my security, they weren't wearing their seatbelts, so they died immediately of head trauma.

Probably the first couple times the plane did the the crazy you know up and down um found out unfortunately the the pilots um were burnt um and uh and we were the only two survivors and so intense man yeah it was insane and you i mean you two guys like you just i mean the fact that you even made it out it's just it's unbelievable oh yeah i mean knowing i mean watching the plane blew up like seconds afterward maybe 50 60 seconds afterwards that's just and it's like that's like out of a movie like that doesn't happen no yeah i mean i think it had everything to do with maybe where i was sitting i was always so crazy i'd sit next to the emergency exit i always had my seat belt on um studying that card yeah instructions yeah i was just always so freaked out you know i wouldn't

sleep until takeoff i would listen to every little noise but yeah and then uh long story short i spent the next four months in a burn center i had 28 surgeries 28 so second and third degree burns all down your legs right yeah all my feet my legs all the way up to my waist um yeah just surgery after surgery skin grafts and you know you came close to losing your foot or your leg at one yeah my right foot was almost amputated mm-hmm so yeah it was a there was that you know there was four months of the burn Center and then there was probably another I think we played our first show seven months after the plane crash and I I couldn't have done it any sooner. I didn't even, once I got home, I was so, I was just, it was insane.

The medicine they had me on in the hospital. Yeah, that must have just amped up all of that, like big time and just medicating like the trauma of what you had experienced, right? And the survivor guilt. Yeah, I had tons of survival guilt. I had suicidal suicidal tendencies i was crazy um and then i was on so many drugs i didn't even realize maybe a month into being in the

hospital i said where's kristen where's jay i want to go in their rooms i just figured they ran there with me yeah you just checked out it was uh was insane. And then when I got home, fast forward, you know, four months after the burn center, I go home and I'm on like 19 different drugs. And they say, you're going to be on these the rest of your life. You need this bipolar medicine. You need this. And it was even scarier, man. I would like. Bipolar?

Yeah. For like PTSD or like what is. Yeah, for PTSD because I was, you PTSD because I was 5150 in the hospital. They were... Wow. There was some really dark times there. But even when I got home, I would walk down the street. It took me a month to even go outside.

And then I walked down the street and I saw a plane in the air and I would run and hide in a bush. I was like... Yeah. I was a crazy person. I didn't even... I was scared, yeah, it was it was I was a crazy person. I didn't even I was scared, you know. But Adam being kind of like a well-known longtime sober dude, like, you know, is he where is he at this moment?

So is he trying to is he trying to like, you know, shock you out of this condition that you're in? Is he trying to help you out at all? Well, Adam goes and we had therapists that we had spoke to leading up before the plane crash just to try to get me sober and to keep him sober. And after the plane crash, he started seeing someone different. And I mean, he would come and visit me. Once I got normal, about a month after I got home, I wouldn't call it normal, but I was a little better. I wasn't, you know, as strange. And, and, uh, you know, even, even when I got home, there was a week, probably a

week of threatening to commit suicide and trying to get my gun and just really, I don't know, just in a really dark place. And then maybe a month later, Adam and I, you know, started kind of meeting up and he's like, let's just talk, man. I want to know what you remember and what I remember. And we would just share stories. And he would tell me, you know, I finally at one point, which is good to note, I just I said, you know what, man? I had heard my uncle talking about me. And I heard one of my best friends going like, dude, Travis isn't the same.

He's like slow. And, you know, I heard people of my best friends going like, dude, Travis isn't the same. He's like slow. And he's, you know, I heard people talking about me. And to me, it was like, these medicines are fucking me up. Like I shouldn't be on them. I feel weird on them, you know? And my doctor was like, you're probably going to need them for the rest of your life. And one day I just grabbed them and I threw them in the trash. I flushed them down the toilet.

And I had like a week of anxiety some of the worst anxiety I've ever had just weaning myself off of them and I just smoked weed I smoked a little bit of weed every day to go to sleep you know because I wasn't when I got home I don't think I slept for like 72 hours straight I was just having flashbacks and somehow the medication from the hospital versus the medication. You know, I was on morphine for five months straight in the hospital. I got home and the medicine wasn't the same. I was losing my mind.

You know, I was like, I couldn't sleep. I was having flashbacks. I was like, oh, I've sweared like I was just supposed to die. It was like final destination. Someone was going to come out of the sky and kill me. And then I got to an okay place and am and i started talking and he said trav we need to go to this spot where they retrain your brain we've got to do this i said i'll go with you so we do this therapy and i just told am i

said man for me 65 of my body was burnt man i'm not gonna forget what happened i'm not gonna forget that was the idea trying to make it forget what happened i'm not gonna forget that was the idea trying to make it so that you couldn't remember it yeah that's what this place supposedly sold us on you know and i was like i'm gonna look down every day and know 65 percent of my body was burnt in a plane crash and i lost my two best friends and it's not you're not gonna there's no way you can convince me that didn't happen but i'll go so we went to all these therapy classes together. But then on the side, he was seeing a new therapist just for PTSD.

And I was seeing the same one that I was in the hospital with that talked to me out of, you know, there was a point where in the hospital, I said, I called one of my buddies and I said, man, I'll transfer a million dollars to you if you just smoke me. I'm done. Just off you. Yeah. That's how'm done just off yeah uh i didn't that's how dark it was yeah i didn't get to see my kids i didn't even like i didn't even it sounds weird to say but i didn't even i couldn't see them i was in no one could come in my room because i was so prone to infection with all these open sores i just was not in my right

mind so he starts seeing a therapist that says, you were in a plane crash. It's okay to take Xanax. To a guy who has like, I don't know, I think 13 years sober. Yeah, he had a lot of time at that time. Yeah, he was, I mean, he was the guy getting me sober, you know? So she says, it's okay. You know, you went through this horrible experience this horrific experience take whatever you need to take and he starts taking xanax um because he's

flying yeah so he's taking that and i can kind of tell there's a difference in him but uh activate the demon you know yeah and at this time'm home. I'm with my kids. In a matter of two weeks, I throw away all their medication. My kids are my, dude, they're my strength. They're my support, everything. I have like, you know, I have the best support team ever. They're watching me recover. And I'm like, I'm finally in a good headspace.

I'm talking to my PTSD person every day. Everything was getting much better. And we have lunch one day and he's just like, man, I don't, you know, you have the kids and you have like, you know, these things to live for and lead by example. I don't have anybody. And, you know, at that point I was just like, well, I mean, we looked online. There was no like, like plane I mean, we, we looked online. There was no like a, like plane, plane crash survivor support groups. Really. There was like, Hey, if you've lost someone in a plane crash,

come here. This is a support group. But we were kind of in a unique situation where we didn't have a lot of survivors to talk to. So I said, man, we have each other, you know, whatever you need anytime of day, just like you were there for me before the accident, we have each other, you know, whatever you need, any time of day, just like you were there for me before the accident, whatever, I'm here, you know, so we would talk all the time, and just, you know, keep each other straight, because we had a, we had something very special that we lived through together, and one of the last times I had seen him, we played, we played

in Vegas, and, you know, we just played New Year's, we were back seen him, we played in Vegas. And, you know, we just played New Year's. We were back on track. We were playing all these cool shows. And we played this incredible show. And it was awesome. And Blink was, it was actually Blink reunion. And we played two shows in the city.

And then A.M. and I played at night afterwards. It was just so good, man. And then after the show, you know, we talk, and I'm like, what a great show. And then he's like, man, he says to me, he's like, man, I just feel like doing a shit ton of drugs and saying, fuck it. And I was like, of course we both feel like that, but we're not going to do it, you know? Especially you, you're sober.

You know, you've helped so many of us be sober and get sober. And at the time, I'm not even smoking weed anymore. I needed maybe a month or two of smoking weed just to wean myself off those toxic drugs that the hospital gave us. And then that was the last time I'd seen him, sadly enough. And that was the last time I'd seen him, sadly enough. And that was the last words he said to me. Yeah, it's brutal. So it's unclear whether it was just a relapse overdose or whether it was a conscious choice to end his pain.

Yeah, we were in New York. And I knew he was going to be there at the same time. We would talk online. I think I said something on Twitter. I had said something like, ah, so good to be back with my boys playing shows or whatever, referring to Blink. And he hit me, and he's like,

everyone could see it too on his timeline. He's like, man, I knew you liked playing with them more than me. Fuck, man. Something to the effect, I hope you don't stop jamming with me or whatever and i was like are you insane man like i love what him and i have were was so strong it was so there's it's impossible for you to be more bonded to another human being yeah experiencing oh my gosh there was nothing or no one I was closer with than Adam. So he was in New York.

And I remember I was in a session. I was in a session with Slaughterhouse, this rap group. And I was working on my album. And he was in New York. So I was supposed to see him. And the day before, we were supposed to meet up. And I see one of my managers. He's like, AIM's not going to come out tonight.

And I was like, why? He's like, dude, I think he's going back to rehab when we go home and i was like why he does he's sober man he's like he's strong as nails man so i hit him up i don't hear back from him you know um continuing to hit him up that night before i go to sleep don't hear back from him the next morning i have a show in new york i'm in the studio with Slaughterhouse. We're in the middle of recording a song called Devil's Got a Hold of Me. Someone had me. It was a laptop, and it just has the news that Adam powerful you know it really is and all the more heartbreaking when it's somebody not only that you love deeply but but somebody that you respect for their sobriety

you know and we forget you know i'm long time sober you know we forget that as alcoholics as addicts that that's our natural state you know know, and for some people, the pain just becomes so overwhelming that it becomes the only choice, you know, I didn't, uh, I didn't know AM, but I have lots of friends that knew him and the guy was just beloved, you know, universally like beloved tragic loss. Yeah. It's, it's still difficult because we don't you know all we know is he was he was planning on going to rehab the following day but i know there's like a history with people having one last hooray you know and and uh it's this idea that yeah i'm gonna i'm gonna go out one last time and then I'm going to clean up and not appreciating the fact that it doesn't always work out so well.

Just because you want to go out doesn't mean that you can come back. And it makes you appreciate and really realize what a gift sobriety is and how fragile it can be. Yeah. Yeah, and then after we found out everything, it was kind of like, for me, it was the question of, well, what was it an accident? Or, you know, was it? Well, the fact that he had plans to go to rehab speaks to it being, you know, sort of balancing more towards accident. Yeah.

Some kind of premeditated. more towards accident yeah and some kind of premeditated it was like was it an accident or was it the last words you said to me which was you know i want to do a bunch of drugs and say fuck it so for me i think i struggled with that like when i was from i still i still struggle with it a little bit i wish i knew clearly what it was but um after that it was it was uh i really it was like final destination. You know, it was even more survival's guilt. Like, am I supposed to be here now? Adam's gone.

Um, and Adam, the strongest human being who I can't even count on both hands, how many people he got sober, our friends, you know, or was like a support group for them, including myself. So for me, it was just like, damn he did he purposely do this or was this an accident and you know i i beat myself up over it yeah but clearly he was in pain he had you know yeah he was in he had some unresolved pain and the pain became unbearable enough where drugs and alcohol or drugs became just the logical option. Yeah. And I think you can just leave it at that.

You know, what happens beyond that, you know, you can't, you know, he knew that you loved him and you can't carry the mantle of responsibility for what happened. You know, you've got to be able to find a way to free yourself from that. you know, you've got, you've got to be able to find a way to free yourself from that. Yeah. Yeah. There was probably about, I was, uh, we were on tour. We were on, I think we were in the middle of a tour. So I had a month left of tour and it was just, man, it was the hardest. We had a show that I think I canceled the show that night. Um, but you know, for that next month, I think I probably played every show with my eyes closed I couldn't even like look up it was just you know I I knew too he would want me to go out there and play but uh at the same time it was just

tough yeah you know especially it was like it was just I mean a friend passing is hard enough but a friend I mean, a friend passing is hard enough, but a friend I went through that with passing, like the only person I could really, you know, speak to about that or kind of see eye to eye and really kind of get each other. That was, that was a tough one to lose. So how do you start to, you know, put together the pieces and heal from this so that you can be you know integrated and functional um i think it was just gaining my strength back again that's what i had to do and like i've said a couple times like my kids were the you know kids

it was it's easy for me to look at them and say i have to be strong and and get my strength from them and uh and set an example of not letting this take me down or you know you know falling victim to drugs it was really easy for me to be sober after am passed away so that happened pretty quickly after that yeah you just got you just got shocked clean oh yeah yeah there was that was like it couldn't have been a bigger eye opener did you just go cold turkey and do it yourself or did you go to 12 step or like how did you no the last thing i did was you know weed was the thing i was i was just doing very very little but still doing it from time to time and it must have been maybe like a month after am passed i had a i had this weird thing man i was recording an album

and i think we were smoking heavily that day and and I had this weird lump on my throat that wouldn't go away to the point where I was kind of freaked out. It was like sticking my finger in my throat. I was like, what's going on? I'm smoking weed. It's grown from the earth. There's nothing bad. I was giving myself every possible excuse,

and I ended up going to the doctor, and I get diagnosed with barrett's esophagus what is that like pre-cancer yeah that was it if there was any question that was it my i talked to my doctor who's a he's not my my my normal doctor out here but he's a friend i i've i've known for years that lives in san diego i said doc he's saying I had Barrett's esophagus he's like Trav this is your warning shot stop right now like you know do whatever he tells you you cannot reverse pre-cancer like there's no reversing any damage that's under your esophagus and I was just that was it for me. It was, you know, that was the last thing.

But you were able to hear it. You had the willingness, right? You know what I mean? It's like, dude, I mean, plane crash, you know, losing AM, you know, cancer in the throat. Like, come on, dude, wake up. Like the universe is trying to gaslight you a little bit here. Yeah. And sometimes I think before that, with every horrific thing that happened to me,

it was like, dude, this happened to you. What's the big deal if I smoke weed? It's like, nah. And then, like you said, it all came together. It was a plane crash. Adam passes away. Still that one therapist resonating, going like, if you were to die today,

would you re-remember it as the man you want to be? I was like, well, I'm still, I'm still smoking weed. I'm, I'm not completely sober. So that was it for me. And, and it was, it was so great, man. And I, and I felt, you know, obviously the first couple weeks was weird adapting to not doing anything, just getting rid of bad habits. But even the people around me, man, the minute you get sober and you stop doing drugs, you stop doing everything, and you're around people who do, maybe in studio environments, and they go to hand you a joint or hand you a drink or hand you some pills. And you say, oh, I don't do it no more. They're like, how'd you quit quit and I noticed so many people were like how'd you do it you know because they knew how bad I was and they knew how

everything was in excess for me I mean psychotic you know I mean I can't imagine the detox from oxys and you know coming down from that state that you were in that must have just been horrific well that was easy to stop after the plane crash because in the hospital, I woke up, I woke up during about 10 surgeries because they couldn't even medicate me. The tolerance was so crazy. Yeah. I'd wake up in the middle of surgery. It was horrible. And I don't know if you could imagine the pain you feel when you wake up too like i i would feel and i would see tons of doctors around me and i would just swing on them i was like i was insane like there was you know i said i said it i think in my book it was like it was sad that it took such

a horrific experience like the plane crash and adam dying for me to get sober but it did it takes what it takes you know what i mean like what's it gonna take to get sober. But it did. It takes what it takes. You know what I mean? Like, what's it going to take to get your attention? Yeah. And go, come on, dude. There's a better way to live. There's a better plan for you. But you're going to have to grab onto it.

Yeah. So it's like all these signals the universe is throwing at you that you need to course correct. Yeah. And what's your pain threshold? You know? Yeah. And now, I mean, now I don't. You know, I never went to a 12-step program. So what has it been like, what is it, five or six years now?

Yeah, it's six years now. I've had great people that are in the program that have taken me to meetings. And I've gone every once in a while. I usually go to one on the anniversary of our plane crash. Or the anniversary of adam's passing um because those are days i feel like i just need some motivation which was recently right wasn't it just like a month or two ago which one seeing like the anniversary of am's passing yeah yeah and then september is the is the plane crash anniversary so those times i kind of i kind of go reach out or i just have a conversation you know like one of the producer i work with that

i do a lot of production with is sober and he's just great but honestly yeah yeah yeah feldy's great man he's sober he has meetings at his house yeah it's really cool that guy's a cornerstone of sobriety yeah he's helped so many dudes yeah and i and i like once again i have to say you know being a full-time father i i get so much joy man that's my favorite role in life is being a dad you know my favorite production more than any album i've produced or hip hop song or anything, you know, it's like my kids, man, just, just, uh, just being a, uh, a role model for them. It's in and being with them has been, you know, the happiest thing ever. Right. It's beautiful. And speaking of your kids, I know you gotta, you gotta pick them up in a couple of minutes here, which is like crazy. Cause there's so many other things

I want to talk. We've been talking for almost two hours and the word vegan hasn't even come up once. I know that's insane about that. Yeah. But I can't, I can't segue to that without at least asking you. And then I got to let you go. I know, um, you know, now that it's been a couple of years since the crash and, and you have some objectivity on your sobriety and that experience, what do you glean from that that can be helpful to somebody? Because it is an experience that's so unique. I mean, there are so few people on planet Earth that have undergone such a traumatic experience and survived right so does that shift your perspective on how you live your life oh it shifted everything um i was very careless before my accident i would you know i was a great father but i would still i mean to me taking tons of

pills and self-medicating myself to get on planes isn't the most responsible and you don't fly anymore no i don't i don't fly that that was the that was one thing i had to do is is after my plane crash i said i'll never fly again um i'll never put myself in a situation where i feel like i have to medicate myself and and uh and and take myself away from my family. If the day comes my kids want to fly, I'll fly with them, and I'll do whatever they want. They're scared. They're really scared to death of flying, obviously because of what happened to me,

and they were really close to little Chris and Che, who passed away in the plane. And then they're just as afraid of drugs because they saw what happened to Adam. So I take a lot from it you know i i live every day like it's my first and last and um and i'm healthier than i've ever been i'm 41 and i'm healthier now than i was when i was 20 or when i was 30 or when i was 35 you know it i've i've i've gotten new addictions as I let go of my old addictions. Fitness is like a big part of your thing now, right? Yeah. Fitness, wellness. Every time I go into Air One, I see you and you're scoping out like some healthy food product,

you know, it's all about the battle ropes and, you know, this routine to sort of be your best self. Yeah. I replaced all the bad stuff with the good stuff. I eat well. I'm vegan gluten-free. I've been vegetarian since I was 15. And I became vegan right after my plane crash. I exercise every day. I just traded all the bad stuff with the good stuff.

And I love working out. I've directly made the connection stuff you know and i i love working out i've directly made the connection between working out and playing the drums and applying you know lots of things from both to each other and it's helped me so much well they were there's they seem to you know meld seamlessly i mean the way you drum is like athletic performance art you know and i can't imagine you know trying to do what you do without being in good physical shape. Like it is an endurance sport. Yeah, absolutely. It's an endurance sport. Absolutely. So I got to let you go, man. Such a bummer. I want to talk to you

about creativity. I'm obsessed with unlocking creativity. I want to talk to you more about the vegan stuff and your daily routines and all this stuff. But I do have to let you go. You've been very generous with your time. So maybe I can hoodwink you to come back and we could talk a little bit more about that stuff. That would be awesome. All right, man. So thanks so much, dude. That was really cool.

I appreciate your openness and honesty talking about some difficult stuff. Of course. Yeah. Very cool. My pleasure. So if you're digging on travis the best way to connect with him is probably your website travisbarker.com at travis barker on all the internet sites yeah yeah instagram is travis barker the book can i say uh which i still have

to read i gotta pick that up this interview came together pretty quickly so i didn't have a chance to read it but i'm looking forward to digging into it cool so pick that up and uh you have any shows coming up soon or any dates um we are heading over to europe for the summer oh wow so yeah we'll be out there in europe and i have with blank yeah with blank cool yeah back together again with the new album and all that kind of stuff yeah it's been amazing i think i don't know where we got nominated for a Grammy, so we'll see. I think they're still announcing who's performing. So, yeah, who knows? Very cool, man. Awesome.

And you just did Kimmel the other night, right? Yeah. Yeah? And you had some crazy show, New Year's, with Steve Aoki, right? Well, no. Was that just you solo? Yeah, I have a DJ drum routine. You know, me being around, like I played with so many great DJs.

Of course, Adam, DJ AM. And then after he passed, me and A-Track did a routine together. Then me and Mixmaster Mike. The walking juicero billboard. Yes. So I've been surrounded with the best DJs ever. And I've always loved DJing and scratching. So I actually have a routine and I've always loved DJ and scratching so I actually

have a routine and I have a residency in Vegas so yeah that's so back to the entrepreneurial kind of yeah your career like as a drummer who does that that you know that's what's always been my thing is like how do I how do you how do I keep creating keep evolving and keep things interesting for myself and do what I love and that's that's one of them you know

I'm taking like what you know being inspired by what AM and I started and just the evolution of that so great talking to you man

yeah man you too cool peace thank you plants Thank you, Lance. All right, we did it. That's this week's show. What'd you guys think?

How'd that one land for you? I don't know about you guys, but I think that guy's super dope. I really enjoyed connecting with him and I look forward to part two of our conversation. And also, congrats again to Travis and to his band members on their Grammy nomination. That's super cool. If you want to learn more about Travis, you can go to TravisBarker.com, at Travis Barker on all the social medias. Check out his apparel line, Famous Stars and Straps, at FamousSAS.com, FamousSAS.com.

And pick up his memoir, Can I Say?, by using the Amazon banner ad at sas.com famous sas.com uh and pick up his memoir can i say by using the amazon banner ad at richroll.com and while you're at it make a point of checking out the show notes on the episode page at richroll.com we've got tons of links and resources uh all about the world of travis and his music uh and we put a lot of time and effort into these to kind of curate uh a sort of curriculum to extend the edification provided by the podcast to kind of take it beyond the earbuds. So check that out. Thank you for sharing the show with your friends and on social media, for leaving a review on iTunes, for subscribing, for grabbing your friend's iPhone and subscribing them to the show. I'm not against that kind of behavior.

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It doesn't cost you one cent extra, but Amazon kicks off some loose commission change at the end of each month. That helps us keep the lights on. So we appreciate that. And of course, mad love to everybody who has taken that extra step to support the work that I do keep the lights on. Uh, so we appreciate that. And of course, mad love to everybody who has taken that extra step to support the work that I do by contributing on Patreon.

Uh, really cool on just, you know, heart, heart touching that, uh, that you would do that means so much to me. If you guys would like to receive a free, uh, weekly email from me, uh, you can do that. It's called roll call. You can sign up on my website. Basically, every Thursday, I send out a short blast, and it has like, I don't know, five or six items in it. Things that, usually just things that I've come across throughout the course of the week. Maybe it's a couple articles I read, long reads, or a book that I'm enjoying, or a documentary that I just saw, or a new product, or a cause. Every week it's something different. And these are things I usually don't share on social media. And the idea behind this is just to cultivate a little extra connection and connectivity and community around the kind of themes and ideas that percolate up through the podcast.

So never any spam. I don't use affiliate links. I'm not trying to make any money off of you. This is just useful, fun information. So that's it. Uh, you can subscribe on my website. And while you're there, uh, I got all kinds of plant power, schwag and merch, uh, stuff. I've got t-shirts, tech tees, plant power stickers, signed copies of finding ultra on the plant power way, all that kind of cool stuff. So you can check that check that out there uh thank you everybody who helped put on this show today jason camiello for audio engineering and production sean patterson for his help on graphics chris swan for additional production assistance and

a lot of work that he puts into compiling the show notes and theme music by analema thanks for the love you guys uh let's try to follow our hearts this week and I'll be back with you guys, uh, in a couple of days. See you soon. Peace. Plants. Thank you.