The Ricky Gervais Show / An Idiot Abroad - Sky1 S1E6 - Brazil (October 29, 2010)

Episode Date: November 5, 2024

Karl is sent to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil to see the iconic Christ the Redeemer statue. However, he finds himself increasingly infuriated by the intense heat and Ricky and Steve's attempts to have him interact with the noisy locals.

The Seven Wonders of the World. Christ the Redeemer. The Taj Mahal. The Great Pyramids. Truly man's greatest achievement. But there's one man who sees them differently. If I built a batch, I'd be going, what's been going on? LAUGHTER Foul, pill king joke. Close your mouth. I don't know the correct term. Moron, I think. He is a round, empty-headed,

chimp-like, mank moron. Buffoon idiot. Is that normal? And he's a friend. Oh! He's a typical little Englishman, and he doesn't like going out of his comfort zone. Bollocks are squashed. I just think it would be amazing to send him around the world. What we'd like to see is him experience other cultures, other peoples,

and see if in any way we can change his outlook on the world. I've been to many exotic places. I genuinely think travel broadens the mind. I want him to hate it. I want him to hate every minute of it for my own amusement. The lights are changing. Lights! Nothing is funnier than Carl in a corner being poked by a stick. I am that stick. And now I have the might of Sky behind me.

Shit! This is one of the funniest, most expensive practical jokes I've ever done. And it's going to be great. Just let me go home! Jesus Christ! Carl, sending you to see Christ the Redeemer. Magnificent religious symbol that towers down over Rio de Janeiro in Brazil. What's your first thoughts of it? Look how big that statue is. I just think of the people who live in Rio, right? They've got

that there every day when they leave the house, they see it. Yeah's there again. Sick of seeing it. It's like a pylon to them that. They get sick of it. It's a good place to meet. You know, you can see it from everywhere. I don't think it was built as a rendezvous point to be fair. I think it's also something to do with the spirituality of the country. But it's not just that that you'll be seeing. You'll be experiencing Brazil as well, a magnificent country. You know the carnival's going to be on when you're there. Like gay, isn't it? Do you feel like you have to be part of that to enjoy it, or do you feel left out if you're not one of them? I understand. Well, he's so confused because I don't think Rio Carnival is known specifically

for its gay fans. There are a lot of men with tans and little posing pouches. Listen, if you want to see a guy in his Speedos and nothing else, this is the place to go, Carl, if that's what... Mm, that's what I mean. I'm not really into that. Can we make a note to make sure that we do get him in a thong on Ipanema Beach? Can we please at least get in the spirit? No, I'm not doing anything that I wouldn't normally do on holiday.

No, but you're... Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. When you're on the beach, you're in trunks, aren't you? No, I don't. I just wear shorts. So, how short? How short? What's the shortest shorts you'd be willing to wear? Would you wear hot pants? No, there's no need for that. There's no need. No need to wear trunks like that.

No, I'm not doing anything for the cameras. Red braces? I'm just gonna go and look at this. That's all I'm doing. I don't need to go to the gay parade. There's no need. That's not the one. It's not a gay parade. Right, enjoy it. This is the hottest I've ever experienced this. Absolutely. I don't know if you can see that.

It's ringing. Is that the Jesus thing up there Chris? Just to your right on that hill. Yeah that's the Jesus thing. It's not as big as I thought it would be. What do you think of this? This is Copacabana Beach. It's alright isn't it?

I mean I know I didn't come for that, I meant to be looking at the Jesus thing but... This makes the Jesus thing better doesn't it? You know that's like a nice little added extra. You're on the beach, have a look up, there it is. What? That thing that's in the films. Oh, hi. Going swimming again. Still hot though, innit? I mean is it normal to have sweaty ears?

I've never had a sweaty ear in my life. I mean they're not even doing anything. And they're hot. I've just got to get to the place that Ricky and Steve have sorted out for me to stay at. I don't know anything about it other than they said that it was a good place to meet people. I don't know what that means. Hi. Hi. I'm Karl.

Welcome to the Barrett's of Ipanema. So this is your gaff, is it? Yeah. Let's go, man. This is the kitchen. And when you cook anything, you try? Yeah, let's go, man. This is a kitchen. And when you cook anything, you try to keep clean of the area, OK? Don't tell me that. Tell the last fellow who's there.

Yeah. This normally, it's a place for pool table. But in carnival, man, stay crazy with 100 persons inside of the house, OK? And the people sleep in their mattress. It's going to be 100 people, isn't it? Yeah, people sleep there, man. Pay more cheaper, but sleep there, because it's crazy.

And this is your dorm. You stay here, close off the window. How much is it here? How much is it normally to stay here for a night? Four pounds point five. Have you got anything for about six quid? That's a little bit better. Anything for just a little bit, dear, just a little bit?

Just round six or seven pounds? No, man, no, we don't have. Right. He's roughing it, then he's roughing it. This isn't proper roughing it. This is just scruffy bastards. It's all right. Just, er... Four quid.

I think it's overpriced. CHIMING Oh, you are having a laugh. CHIMING You are having a laugh. Ricky and Steve thought you needed to socialise with other people, so that's why they put you... I don't like socialising. I don't do that. I'm just not that sort of person. I'm old in my age now. You know, I've got enough friends.

I've always said you only need seven mates to get you through life. That's why I mentioned Snow White with the midgets, because you had them all covered in seven. Same thing again with friends. I've just found out that the Rio Carnival's on, which is the big dance thing that they do in Brazil every year. Ricky and Steve are probably aware of this, and that's why they've sent me here this time of year,

because they know I don't like crowds, they know I don't like parties, so to them this is hilarious. OK. They've sorted out a local fella called the Hickey who's going to teach me how to do the samba. He's going to pick me up on his motorbike. All right. Look at how I came to dance. I'm just walking to be honest with you. We are prepared to you to do this big parade, okay? So first of all, we should What do you mean? We are going to parade with this big school of samba. Well, I'm going to be doing it in front of...

Thousands of people, camera and everything else. It's going to be quite a performance. Like that. Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. Oh, tsk, tsk. OK, you there, here. Do it again, do it again, do it again. Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. Cha, cha, cha, cha, cha, cha, cha, cha, cha. You dare here

From back No, no, no, no, no, no, no Is there no area where you've just got a load of people who aren't very good but you let them take part because they're it's simple or something? Just put me with them. I'm pushing you to the higher level. That's what you're gonna wear in this, your headdress. You're just gonna look lovely in this. Just perfect. Is everyone gonna be wearing this? Everyone's gonna be like that. Not ready for to be wearing this? Everyone's going to be like that.

Not ready for this, am I? I mean, this is like their World Cup final, isn't it? And you wouldn't say, oh, Karl likes a game of foot. He's sticking him in goal. They shouldn't have me anywhere near it. What do you think? Handi-pandy on crack. I mean, I'm in Rio, right?

I'm meant to be seeing Christ the Redeemer. So what am I doing dressed up like a clown taking part in a carnival? I mean, what am I meant to get out of this? Look at this. It's not a good sign is it? I've got shit on it and the things coming off. I'm sure one day I'll look back at this and go, I was in the carnival. But it's just not happening now. I'm sort of thinking, I'm in the carnival now. Like what am I doing here?

I mean, when a hickie said, you know, we were going to a samba-drome, I pictured something, just something better than this really. I mean, what is this? We're in the middle of nowhere, just like a trading estate, isn't it? With a bit of kitchen line on the road for people to dance down. People sat either side on the chairs. I mean, it's nothing special, is it? Our float starts, I think three or four floats that way. So really, I couldn't be any further back.

I mean, it's almost like being at the back of the London Marathon. By the time I go over the end line, people are home in bed, yet I might as well be dressed as a rhino in a fun room. I feel like that. I mean I'm next to like a couple of old women now, you know, I can't ask for more really. I'm right at the back and with some 70 year olds, if I can't look good in this, I shouldn't be here. MUSIC PLAYS Oh, I'm knackered, man, I'm knackered. Oh, I can't blister. I've got my feet in the... Oh, look at that blister. Bloody hell.

I don't know if she's in the carnival or just earning a few quid at this time of night. I've no idea. I mean, if I've got blisters on my feet, I dread to think what an arse is like. Oh, fucking hell. Are you going to go for a wash? Nah, forget it. Not worth it, is it? You've seen the mattress. Not worth it. You've seen the toilets. It's the equivalent of having one of those sort of Romanians that traffic lights clean your windscreen. They don't do a good job because they can't. They've got some dirty water and a dirty sponge. Same as in there. But, er, like I say, I can't sleep anywhere tonight. Thank you, St. Peter! Don't you want to go down and have a drink and have a party? No, it's embarrassing, isn't it?

I'm like, I could be someone that had dads. I'd be like your dad going to a party that you're having and stuff. I mean, I'm hoping that they kind of think I am old, and at least when they come back up here later, they might be quiet, don't wake him up, he's old. Yay! I'd be happier in an old people's home. Seriously.

They'd all be in bed now. CHANTING They'd all be in bed now. I can't do this, seriously, I can't do it. I'm not letting Rick and Steve sort of do this, because that isn't what it's about. To tell you what, they wouldn't do it. Rick and Steve wouldn't be doing it. You know what I mean? There's no way Steve could hack it here. He goes home to his mum and dad's when he's got a cold. You know that?

Right, my hard heart. It's not the first time I've seen that since I've been here. I don't even get the impression they're that religious here, to be honest. As far as with a lot of religious people, it's about covering up, isn't it? And being quiet, you know, not being sexy. Whereas here, you feel like you've been out with some other women, you've seen that much of them. Everything's on show, isn't it? There's nothing left to the imagination here.

I mean, look at him. No shame, just nipping out for a loaf. When I go to bed, normally wear him more than that, just in case something happens in the night, a fire alarm goes off or something, you've got to leave the house. It's mad though, isn't it? Because I'm here in Brazil, you know, to see Christ the Redeemer, the wonder of the world, the reason why I'm meant to be here, and yet Rick and Steve are saying, oh, don't be worrying about that yet, we've got some other plans for you. You know, get down to the beach and meet this local fella. He's named Celso, you know, he's going to show you around the place.

It's you. It is me, yeah. How are you? You're Cel-Cel. I'm Cel-Cel. How are you? Nice to meeting you. How are you doing?

I'm very well, thank you. Can I sit down? No, I don't want to sit down. I just want to give you something that the first contact we always have to wear it Condoms I've never had that as a gift on a first meeting before sure a little bit forward. Yeah Tell me what's going on you will see in a minute Yeah. Sit down. Tell me what's going on. You will see in a minute.

Why is he no other men in here? Why is he no other men? There's a woman over there looking at me in a funny way. Yeah, they have a woman here but they have a lot of men that come here too. You've known me now for a bit. Will I be happy with this. Wait. Well, you know those guys that do serve, they wax here.

Would you like to try? Not really. They all seem like the sort of bloke who has a wax. I'm like an ape. Well, you look nice to have a wax. It's going to work a lot. Yeah, but my girlfriend likes it. She likes it.

Oh, is that she? Yeah, she loves it. She loves the hair a bit. I can get out whilst you get undressed if you want. No, no. Why don't you try even on your arms a little bit? I'd feel much better without a hair. Yeah. Well, that bit you're having done there, I wouldn't mind getting that done because sometimes

I have to tuck it in my pants. That's a sign it's a bit too long, innit, when you have to start tucking it in. Oh, Jesus, it's hot. Relax. If you don't relax, you you have to start sucking it in? Oh Jesus, it's hot! Relax. If you don't relax, you won't enjoy it. Oh Jesus, that's bad, that. That is bad. She did, she took a bit then. No, just a little bit, just to say it's ready.

Ah, ah, ah, ah, Jesus! Is it bleeding? There was two other parts. If I left it, would it look stupid? Oh, it's not good. It seems that you have something here. She shouldn't be laughing, to be honest. Oh, you look so clean.

Yeah? Yeah. You look nice. Really nice. I suppose it's good for me to meet different kinds of people, innit? You know, there's no point having mates who are all the same. Let's see some boom boom. Something for the beach.

What do you think? I don't think this is necessary. I mean, Celso's different to me other mates. Regalo. He'd be like, you know, a new addition. Would you like to see some of these over there in front? To see each one fits on you? No, honestly, I don't want a pair.

See, it's not wrong with these. Do you know what I mean? That's all you need. All right, mate. How are we doing? Er... I don't know if I'm seeing the real Brazil, to be honest. How we doing? I don't know if I'm seeing the real Brazil, to be honest. I mean, I... You got to get out of the wrong country. No, I just mean in terms of like, you know, what I've been up to. Tall and thin and young and handsome, the boy from Ipanema goes walking in. When he passes each one, he passes and goes, the boy from Mipanima goes walking in.

When he passes each one, he passes and goes, oh. Here I am. How do I look? No, well, he bought me some. Yeah, that's not... That's madness. Just try it, just a little silk pouch or something, or a red stashing pouch. I don't understand why you need that much of a tan. When I get home, I won't be saying, look at the colour of me,

whipping me arse out, just the face. You're feeling hot aren't you? I'm not used to this. I'm sweating. My feet are killing me. How about the thing that I bought you yesterday? Don't you feel comfortable now that it's so hot to wear it? Because I'm going to wear mine. I'm already wearing it. Well, you'd see me arse and they'd be looking at it and going,

Oh, look at the state of him. Nobody's going to look at you. They are, they are. I have to tell you a story about this part of the beach. On the 70s, all the artists used to come here, smoke marijuana and do this kind of stuff. And then since then, this part of the beach has become a very famous and a gay beach too. And I would like to sit down because I'm tired. We've been walking miles, just keep going for another couple of minutes.

Oh, I'm so tired. Come on. I would like to sit down. I mean, it's good seeing this, but let's keep walking. Bloody hell, in only another two minutes, we'll be out of it. Come on. We can, but I would like to sit down. Don't worry about it.

It's a beach like any other beach. Yeah, but it's honestly, do you know what I'm saying about being closed in? I love this weather. Yeah, I'm not enjoying it. This wind. So delicious. No, there's a chair for us. I'm not in. I love this weather. Yeah, I'm not enjoying it. This wind. So delicious. No, there's a chair for us. I need a chair.

Give me the chair, my beautiful. Thank you. Ah, delicious. Massive beach. Let's sit here. Lovely. Oh, I'm sorry, but I have to take my shirt off because it's too hot. Just keep it.

Are you gay or what? What do you think? It's hard to tell. It's hard to tell. Yeah, I think there's a friend of mine. Not that much to see you here. Are you going to a show for us today? Hi, how you doing?

Yeah Marcelo. Marcelo? I'm Carl. Nice to meet you. Hi Carl. How you doing? Welcome to Rio. You're happy?

But look, you're frying over there. No I'm fine. Because I've got a few, I've got pretension. What do you mean you're fine? You can't be fine. No, honestly. Clothes in the Rio de Janeiro, it's like, please, you're eager. You have novelty value.

You're also whitey and you get pinky. It's a lovely colour. Like really, really lovely. Different from everyone else. People like the difference. So why do you have to hide your beauty? I keep it for my girlfriend. A girlfriend? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you mean the others? What others? What do you mean the rest of humanity? You just need to be looked at. This is what the beach is all about. It's not, that's why I don't come here that much.

I don't like being looked at. I just thought a quiet bit, if I was going for a quiet walk. I'd love a quiet walk. Really? Look at this. I'm going to have some message and I would like you guys to join me. No, I'll watch. I don't need one. OK. OK. Woo. Thank you. I've seen people have a back rub. Thank you. Seeing people have a back rub. Fucking hell.

I'll tell you what, he should have had his arse done yesterday, shouldn't he? He had his back and his front one. Look at that there. You know, and to think that earlier on, I was asking whether he's gay or not. I feel a bit daft now. I mean, I don't want to moan, do you know what I mean? I know I'm quite lucky to do what I'm doing, but I thought the idea was that Ricky and Steve wanted me to broaden my mind, that's what this is all about, but being in that carnival yesterday, that didn't broaden my mind, did it? That just knackered me legs up. You know I'm here to see Christ

the Redeemer, the wonder of the world, why can't I just see that and go home? But now they're calling up saying oh why don't you go and see a block party. You seem to have a party for any occasion really, it doesn't have to be your birthday, it's just, it's a Wednesday, let's have a get together. So yeah that's what a block party is, just going along, hundreds of people, you know I don't like being in crowds but It's a bit of a get together. So, yeah, that's what a block party is. Just going along, hundreds of people, you know, I don't like being in crowds, but apparently you get quite busy.

Closest thing I've probably done to this block party is when I was a kid and it was the Queen's Jubilee. And like, you know, people turned up on the street, you brought your own food, everyone had a good time and went home. I didn't enjoy that. I remember my man being annoyed that Scruffy Sandra turned up and had a load of trifles, you didn't bring anything.

["The Queen's Jubilee"] It's basically a big queue with someone playing some music, absolutely I don't know who I'm queuing for. And I hate these sort of silly weeks and stuff. I mean, maybe I'm miserable, maybe I'm the only one here who isn't enjoying it, but if I'm not enjoying it, I shouldn't be here. I know this isn't for me. My ears just haven't stopped since I've been here. I get off the plane, they were sweating.

I've never had sweaty ears. My ears just haven't stopped since they've been here. I get off the plane, they were sweating. I've never had sweaty ears. And since then they've been overworked with constant, you know, drums. Singing. Whistles. Chanting. Dogs. Helicopters.

Gaze. Gaze wouldn't massage for your ego. Gaze wouldn't normally be on that list, but the one I'm at here just wouldn't shut up. Great place to live if you're deaf. That's what I'd say about Rhea. Lovely and relaxing if you're deaf. How's the hostel? Oh, I left that in the end. Did my head in.

You left it? Yeah, it was ridiculous. I mean, I'm not that fussy in that, but it was minging. It was underpants hanging on the end of my bed, and they weren't even mine. Well, I've got a little good news for you. You wouldn't have already met Celso. He has personally invited you to stay with him in his place. Put my name there.

Stay with him. Have a great time. But what's the point of this, seriously? But you've already got over it. We've already a mate. You don't turn down hospitality like that. I wouldn't go that far. If you have been for the night, you take it, my friend.

Come on, treat it like a B&B. You know, you don't have to defend the on, treat it like a B&B. You know, you don't have to defend the prisoner of war for B&B. Isn't that a gay term, that? I've heard that's a gay term, B&B, for bum and bollocks. I mean, I'll do it. I'm not that bothered. I mean, I know his house is going to be nicer than where I am now. Well, what am I doing with him? Is it a night in?

Can we just have a game of cards or...? Have a game of cards or? So glad you decided to stay Where you come in here in Brazil? We have a tradition when a friend or someone come to your place this person have to sleep on your bed Because this tradition when you receive a friend... I've never heard of this tradition. Yeah, but this is Brazil. This isn't here in Brazil.

Sleeping on your bed? Yeah. I don't want to do that. But that's the tradition in Brazil. I don't know about the traditions. I'll keep it to yourself. That's what I'm telling you. That's the way to say that you're welcome to my place.

This is a lot of kit you're keeping. Yeah. And that's where I sleep. So where are you going to go? I have to work. I'll be back late tonight. When Steve said go and stay, I did expect something different. I thought it'd be a bigger place.

I mean, I ate anything that's overcrowded I can't even think straight I mean for me popping that up there pop it in the bin it's just like look there's a hole there shove it in that seems to be his thing in life if there's a hole pop something in it and it's nothing to do with anything but this is. I think it's a tradition that you should do if you've got the room for it. I don't even like this. I'm just having it because again, I feel guilty. I'm just doing all stuff to please the fella who don't even know. He doesn't even tell me what he does and stuff. Oh Jesus, what was that? Here I am. How are you?

May I sit down? Sit down, yeah. Excuse me. I'm ready to go to job. This is the last thing you should know about me. I'm a female impersonator. Close your mouth. This is my name.

As a female impersonator, my name is Lorna Washington. Why so surprised? It's just weird. It's weird, er... The way I behave, you know. I don't... No, no. Just sort of looking at your ear and the voice coming out, that I know. Oh, yeah? But it's like you've had... ...whizzle gummage sort of change the head. Change the head. It's a little bit freaky.

Okay. Be yourself comfortable. Be at home. You're home. Change the head. It's a little bit freaky. OK. Be yourself comfortable. Be at home. You're home. I'm leaving. All right. Have a nice night. I'll see you when you get back.

Is it normal, this Brazilian tradition of making everyone feel welcome Does that still count when you say I want you to stay but I'm going out I don't see how that that counts Things like that freak me out And wake up in the night without laughing at me or something. Like Chucky. I've been in the toilet and there's a couple of cockroaches. I know we're in Brazil, they're everywhere, but I don't like them. I can't see him now.

Don't worry about it. So he's got two fridges to put place in. I'm cooking, I'm cooking, I need a garlic. Where's the garlic? Is it in that one, that one? No, it's not, it's down here in the corner with a cockroach next to it. Look at that down there. I've heard that cockroaches are like the toughest thing that's on the planet. They say like this is a nuclear bomb. They'll carry on living. Yet in Salso's kitchen, dead. It's a bit rude and it's sort of looking at his house whilst he's out. Well then again, he shouldn't be out, should he? I said it all there. It's Elso's kitchen, dead. It's a bit rude and he's sort of looking at his house whilst he's out.

Well then again, he shouldn't be out, should he? I said it all there. It's his house and he's not here. I don't think we should stay. Hiya, Elso, it's Carl. We haven't got your mobile phone number, so we've had to call your home number. Even though we're still sat here. But we're about to leave because it's too noisy.

Hope your Friday night was good. Thanks for having us around. Honestly, I don't know why he invited me round. Cos it's a bit weird, isn't it, that he gets me round and then he goes out. The only thing I can think of is, you know, he lives in quite a rough neighbourhood and he's thinking, oh, I'll get Carl round, you know. He can be a bit of security. That's all I can think of. Ah, I just want to go to a quiet beach, really.

Get away from it all. If it's wearing me out. It's just been a full on week, hasn't it? What with the carnival and then the block party and that late night at Celso's and stuff, do you know what I mean? There's been nothing relaxing about it, has there? It's not holiday. I thought it was, that's why I took the job on, to be honest.

But it's a good beach. Sea's a bit active, I wouldn't get in that. Yeah, other than that, it's nice enough. I worry that if there's more people turning up, it's not that big. I don't want to be here if it's crowded. Oh, for fuck's sake. Ah, you know. Oh, for fuck's sake.

Ah, fucking hell. I can never enjoy anything, can I? Is that the plan, to never let me just have a normal nice day? You've always got a... What do you mean? Well, it's obviously some nudist speech, innit? I'm not... You know, I didn't put trist speech, innit? I'm not do... You know, I didn't put trunks on, did I?

I'm not gonna walk around with my cock and bollocks out. It's not even that hot yet. He's kept his t-shirt on, but his pants, a little bit hot down there, gotta whip them off. Look, bending over now for a... I've never seen anyone bend over so much as him. I've never seen anyone bend over so much as him. Bloody hell.

How are you doing? I'm all right, yeah. Not bad. Okay, but here in this beach you have to remove your clothes. It's an atrism beach. What, if I want to stay here I have to take them off? Yeah. These are the rules? Yeah, it's the rules of this beach. The one that's quite interesting is if a male beachgoer gets a bit sort of excited,

go into the sea it says, until it calms down. But that's embarrassing because that means everyone knows what's happening. If you suddenly just suddenly run into the sea and stand there looking round, I wonder if these two women here, it's their job to be honest, so it doesn't happen as much. It's like a little, you know, a safety thing to stop it happening. I haven't seen one fella running there and look worried.

What are we doing? We've been going down the beach. We can't be mad about that, then. Well, I haven't finished. It was a nudist beach. What? That's good, isn't it? You know, I didn't like it.

I felt a bit uncomfortable there. And old people's stuff is, because they're doing that all the time, it was all like leather. It's not about being nude and being free and that. They just don't like wearing pants. That's the end of it. They're pant haters. I just think they're not bad, don't they?

I don't know why they don't just cut a little hole in a pair of trousers. I like to think they've got to cut the arse out, don't they? Yeah, I saw that at the carnival. He was an arse on show. I don't know who's going to watch this. What's the rating class going to say? And now, on Sky 1, Carl Filkington, an idiot who doesn't know anything, walking around looking at old men's knobs. I mean, I don't know, it's not going to be a great write-up, is it?

Well, Sky 1 normally put that sort of shit out. I think it's... That's a good answer. Yeah, okay. We've got the trailer sorted. Well I'm going up the mountain today, aren't I, to see the Christ the Redeemer. Which is a little bit weird that they've stuck it so high up on a mountain out of the way. It's almost like the locals don't want people to see it. I mean on a cloudy day you can't. It's weird. So anyway I'm just going to go up and have a look.

Steve sorted out a woman to give me a lift. So yeah I'm going to go and have a look at it, see if it's any good. You know I'm here to broaden the mind, I'll give it a go, I'm not saying it's going to be rubbish before I've seen it. I sort of think from a distance, Jesus, top of a hill, looking like he's about to bungee jump, you pass it, you go, there he is, great, what else are we doing? That's enough really for me. Carl, nice to see you too, I'm Dolores now. Dolores, Dolores.

Let's go. Yeah, let's go. Yeah, let's go. Touch this out. The founder of the city. I am the driver. You look like... Yeah, you keep looking there. You look like... I've just seen the back of Jesus' head. Yes, look at the beautiful, my beautiful man. The big fella. How many stairs are we? 220. 220 steps, yeah. There he is.

There he is. Come here, you're going to sit very well. I will explain you very good. You are in the top of the world, man. Come, come, come, because this is the view, you know. Look what a beautiful... Oh, that's... I'm in the top of the world, man. Come, come, come, because this is the view, you know. Look, what a beautiful... Oh, that's... I mean, everyone's way.

Look here, look. From here, with this light behind. Seems like magic. Look at the face, which is so delicate, so clean. The weight of the statue is 1,145 tons. Bloody hell. And it's not there to punish anybody to say, no, it's open arms, blessing the city. Nice woman and everything, but it's that thing, isn't it,

that she loves it so much that I'm not going to change her mind, I'm not going to come here and say, you know, it's all right, but it's not that amazing, is it? It's like telling someone that the kid's ugly. It doesn't matter how ugly that kid is. The mum and dad love it to bits. And I didn't want to say it, but when I was looking up I thought, the chin looks a bit big. It's like that. All the rest of it is brilliant. The proportions, his arms and that, his body, but they just need to chip away a bit more, I reckon, at the chin.

It's a bit sort of Jimmy Illish. Say if I get back home and someone says, you've seen Christ Redeemed? I go, yeah. And they go, what's it like? I'd probably just say, it's like a big ornament. Do you know what I mean? It's like something me aunt Inora would have, sort of next to the telly.

But I'd say if you're gonna come up here, it's not about that, it's about that lot. It's about coming up here and seeing all the view there. Knock that down. You still get a crowd coming up here. You could stick anything there. Stick a cafe there. And people would come up here.

You can charge as much as you like because you've got nowhere else to go, you're trapped. You're dying of thirst. Charge you about four quid for a can of Coke. The only mistake he made is, I said, like, he had a chin like Jimmy Hill. And after that, people told me it's not his chin, it's his beard, but it doesn't look like a beard.

So they could have just done with chipping a bit more out, make it look a bit more airy. I was saying that, there's so many sort of flying ants around there, I imagine the workers going I've had enough of this, does that look like a beard? Yeah it does Bob, let's go. I'm not hanging around here, that ruined it a bit, I don't know why there's so many flying ants up there. Ants shouldn't have wings, I mean, when you see them walking,

they're all over the place. They sort of go forwards and then come back exactly the same path and shoot off over there and come back again. If they're not good at walking, they're gonna be useless with wings. I mean, if I don't like it, there's no point in me saying,

oh, it's magnificent now. Do you know what I mean? It's just, that's false, isn't it? And that's what I told Steve. And he was going, oh, Carl, you're an idiot. How can you not be blown now. Do you know what I mean? It's just, that's false, isn't it? And that's what I told Steve. And he was going, oh, Carl, you're an idiot. How can you not be blown away by, you know, the wonder of the world? And I said, oh, I think it was the crowd that did me.

I didn't enjoy it because of all the people up there. So he sorted me out a helicopter ride to see it from above. He said, that will blow me away. So have you been in a helicopter? No, no, I've never done it before. So it's just a little bit nervous about it. It's just you've got no chance, have you? If it goes wrong, it's not like a plane that glides.

It just drops. It's almost, it shouldn't be in the air, really. Should have left a message for Suzanne, really, but. Do you want to say a quick word? No, I'll leave it. She gets a load of money anyway, doesn't she, if it all goes wrong? Oh, God. There it is! There's the big Jesus.

Sneaking round the back of him. Oooooooh! Brilliant. Love that. I've always kind of thought people with money who buy one, you sort of go, absolute no bed. What do you need one of them for? It's definitely the best way to get about that. I mean the landing's a little bit like, oh God. And I wasn't really enjoying seeing the wonder at the time because I'm like thinking, am I gonna land and all that? But it's brilliant. Best thing, I reckon I can go home now.

What you're telling me is that you went up in a helicopter and you really liked being in a helicopter. Yeah but- That's it, that's the big finale of the program, is it? I just thought you meant when you said about the helicopter, I just said I enjoyed it, that's all. Yeah, and the Jesus thing's alright as well. You enjoyed the helicopter and the Jesus thing's alright as well. Next time on an idiot abroad...

That's your pitchu. Bit out the way. It's accessible by an 11-hour trek through the mountains. Well, that's not accessible, is it? That's true! I'm not getting on this. Why is it landing on water? There's enough land here. Chop some of the trees down.

Oh, fucking hell! It's getting to the end of the day. I've got to try and sleep in the jungle. Fuck! Fucking hell! You're not meant to laugh, you're meant to go ooooh! There's no way anyone will be watching this going, that looks pleasant. Elsie, can't you go in there? Definitely not.