The Ricky Gervais Show / An Idiot Abroad - Xfm S2E26 (February 15, 2003)

Episode Date: September 4, 2022

With the second series of ‘’The Office’’ complete, Gervais, Merchant, and Pilkington returned to XFM in August of 2002 to resume their 2-hour Saturday afternoon broadcasts. Though Pilkington’s name was still not being used in promotional materials, the format mainly centered on his contributions with Gervais and Merchant mostly reacting to the various things Karl said and did, a format that would endure through the remainder of the radio broadcasts and podcasts, concluding in 2012.This was the longest stretch of XFM shows, running 51 weeks until August 2003 when Gervais and Merchant again went on hiatus, this time to record the Christmas Special (finale) for ‘’The Office’’.During the year, Pilkington introduced many of the show’s most notable segments including “ Monkey News”, “Rockbusters”, “Songs of Phrase”, and “The Film Thing”, among others. Karl grew increasingly frustrated with Ricky’s antagonism toward him throughout the year, and over the final few shows, suggested he did not want to continue on. Gervais and Merchant repeatedly said on air they would not return if Pilkington didn’t agree to remain with the show.

White stripes, dead leaves and the dirty ground on XFM, 104.9. I'm Ricky Gervais with me Steve Merchant, Carl Pilkerton. We have got a great show lined up for you. Absolutely. It's just a Valentine's weekend, some love songs. We've got some chat and of course the competitions. I'll tell you what, I was walking here today and there's police, there's about a million people sort of just milling around, standing around with placards and stuff. I don't know what they're doing, but they've got too much time on that. They need a war.

You don't read the newspapers do you? Boring. Oh, those boys can rock there. That's the guns with all the roses. And sweet child are mind. Oh, an XFM 104. I enjoyed that. Yeah. That was good. It rocked. I hope the audience was playing it loud like us. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, really nice.

Steve Merchant, Carl Pilton. Well, look at him yawning. How rude is that? Carl, what's wrong with I always have a problem with that. I always have a... because you don't go to bed do you? Early? Do you know what I mean? You sort of think... I just always find that thing that if, you know, you used to live in with someone, one of you will go, well let's go to bed, then you'll go all right. Um, but when you're on your own you go... You just forget to... You just forget their you just forget their their you just forget to to their to to to to to to to to to to to their to to their to their th. You just forget their th. You just forget th. You just forget their th. You just forget th. You just forget their th. You just forget their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. You just forget th. You just forget th. You just forget th. You just forget th. You're just forget th. You're just forget th. You're just forget to th. You're just forget to th. I. I th. I th. I th. I th th to th th th th th th things. I th th th th thoooooooooooooooooooo. I to to th've got all the food, that's just the plate. Oh right, okay. No, I just, I stayed up and watched, um, there was a thing on about Dracula. Right? What, Dracula? And I found a floor in it.

Go on. Not, not the fact that is the living dead and there's, no. No. And he drinks blood to stay alive and he doesn't thak, the thak, thua. thua. thua. thua. thuu. thu. th. thu. th. th. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thu. It was, thu. It was, thu. It was, th. It was, th. It th. It th. It, th. It th. It, th. It, th. It th. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. th. th. th. th. thin. thin. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. there. thi. thi. thr. thi. It was tha.to go on. The mirror thing you can't look in mirrors can he? Well he can look in mirrors but he can't see himself in a minute. Like that, it still doesn't work. Okay, go on. It doesn't work at all, it doesn't work at all. It doesn't work anyway. Well, centre partings always really neat. His centre partings always always loud. How does he do it if you can't look at a mirror. Blood on the floor or something it was called, rubbish. I love the floor in the Dracula film is that it's St. and Farton's too neat.

How do they do it without a mirror? Was it a documentary about Dracula? No, it was the real Dracula. The real Dracula, is it the real Dracula? It's just the film, it, blood on the floor or something. It's rubbish. It's rubbish. Yeah, the, the, th, the, the, th, the, th, the, the, th, the, th, th, th, their, th, th, their, th, th, their, th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a their, th. It's, th. It's th. It's, their, their, their, the, their, the, the, their, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, their. It's, it, it, it, their. It's their. It's their. It's a their. It's their. It's their their their their their their their, their their their their, their their, their, their, their, their, their or something it's called from 1970. Yeah right. But you say that and watch that? You know there aren't really vampires done in that sense? Yeah. Yeah but it's still annoys you that it's sent apart and was too neat. Well if you're gonna do it? Do you know what I mean? I'd like to see him with a fringe sort

of push forward and maybe a hood up all right? Yeah just bits of tissue paper all over his face where he's cut himself feeding. I can't see, bloody mirrors annoying me now, I'd love to see that. A little mank drak. That'd be great wouldn't it? Well, that might be a film that we do in our movies. Mancula. Just getting on to that. Man Funny how old this like that? I'll be brilliant. He came from Manchester. Please welcome Mancula. All right? That'd be great, wouldn't it? His airs a mess. Well, I can't see a mirror, can I? Well, we've got a show lined up for you. Sad news for rockbusters. It is going to be the last rockbusters. Does that mean that we are doing another one and it's the last one? And it's the last one. Oh man. But a bit of a special one, Steve.

Have you? It's just sort of done on the... It makes sense? No, it's... First time only. It's done on accents because I'm running out of like clues and that to use. Oh is this as bit good as the Jamaican one? The detrault spinners? The trout spinners? It doesn't work at all. A bit like that. Okay so go on what's the gist of this one? Well it's just I've been the sound effects but that didn't really work out. So there's three sort of cryptic clues and it's done on, it's done on accents and I've sort of the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty tho' tho' tho' tho' thirty thrown thri' thripea'er's throut throut throut throut throut throut throut throut throat's throat's throat's throat's throat's throat's throat's throat's thout, thout, thout, th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thirty. It's thirty. It's thirty. It's thrown out out out thrown out thrie thrown out thrie. It's thrown out thrown out thri' thrown out throwne. It's throut, thrown down the country so I've got a northern one,

we've got a brummy one and I've got a cockney one. Excellent. We'll look forward to that. We've got quite a lot of competitions, haven't we? He's appearing in the Shining this week's excellent. Okay. We've also got, oh, chimpanzee, that, more monkey news. Stay tuned for that. But there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. that's that's that's that's that. that's that. that's a that's a that's a that's a th. th. that's a th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's the. It's the. It's the. It's thea. It's thea. It's thea''er. It's thea'er. It's thea'er. It's the. It's the. Monkey News. Stay tuned for that. But there's one that I thought we could phase in as we phased out rockbusters. It's an old favorite. Carl was before your time. Ex-Family fortunes. It's brilliant. It's nothing to TV show Family Fortunes. No, it's

ex-family fortunes. You can't get him on that. So we'll be playing that a little bit later. So we'll we ex we ex we ex the wex it it th th th th th th th th th. It th. It th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. th. thi thi's thi's thi's th-a' tho-a-a' thi-a' tho-a' tho-a' that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. thea'''-wa'-a'-a'-wa'er. thea''a'er's thea'a'a'a'er's the. the with two lucky people that we'll be giving away some great prizes I'm made Steve. Go through those a little bit later. As it was Valentine's Weekend, what about a lovely song by Lloyd Carl? Like Lovers do, like Lovers do. Lloyd Coulton, like Loveys, like Love, love us do. Lloyds, we're having to laugh aren't we? Little Carl with his sandwich and that. It's true, that wasn't it? Oh, I'm having to, oh, I'm still bruised where you punched me in the shoulder showing that you could box. Yeah, to be fairly, Rick, you do think that you're now a professional boxer because you've been on the time. I'm not boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. thee. thee. thee. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, I was. Oh, I'm that's that's that's that. Oh, I'm that. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, I the. Oh, I the the the the the the that that that that that that that that that that that's I that that that that that that that's of the time, don't I, Carl? And often Carl. Yeah, yeah. I look, because it's little

round it, I got another mate that's got a little bald head and I'd like to squeeze it. Do you like like an egg? You can squeeze it that way, sort of sideways and that hurts, but then squeeze it forward back, it doesn't hurt so much, do it?............... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, th. Because, because, because, th. Because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, I I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, the. And, the. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, the. And, the. And, the. And, the. And, the. And forward to back it doesn't hurt so much does it? Do you know what worries me though I think if you ever actually did crack Carl's and I think yoke would come out? Yeah, he was drawing and I gave me a little karate chop on the back of the head and he jumped and he spasmed! Sorry, you gave him a karate chop on the back of the head? Yeah, to be fair though I think I'd sped if the that if I'd the man I'd that if the man that if the man that that that that that that back? Didn't I laugh? Oh yeah, this is right, good laugh. Oh, so we got lots of little things to get through me. Look at his little face.

You're right? We had little lunch yesterday, didn't we? We did indeed. That was a nightmare. Yeah. I hate going out with you too. I was explaining to Carl, right? I like to excite Carl's imagination, right? And, I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their? I to their? I to their, their, their, their, it involves chimps or monkeys all the better, brains he likes, parts of the body deformity, you know, I know where to, you know, what buttons to push. And I told him about this thing, I don't know if any of you out there know about this. But there's an experiment they did in the 50s, a clinical psychology experiment where there's two hemispheres of the brain, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, the the the thors, thors, thors, thors, thiops th, thiops thiops thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, brains, brains, brains, brains, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, their, their, thi, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, brains, brains, brains, their, brains, they did in the 50s, a clinical psychology experiment where your two hemispheres of the brain, okay, they're joined by a thing called the corpus colosum, right, which is just a little flap of skin, like a little scartly that joined your two hemispheres, and what they did, they cut that in half, and I thought it was a cure for schizophrenia, but what it took out to be, or their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their-a, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thr, thr, throwne, throwne, thea, thea, thooomoomoomorrow, thea, their, their, their, their, their, their,'t remember, was that your two sides your brains didn't function together you couldn't get information. I was telling Carl all this

thing, one of the things I told him was that they did it on a monkey and it fought itself over a nut like its right arm was connected you know by its left low with the brain and it was fighting over itself and Carl went instead of like thinking this is amazing experimented, he went would it would th., would th., would th, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would it, would th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I thi, thi, thi, thi, the, the, was, the, was, theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, was, thin, the, th is amazing experiment, he went, would it have been happy if you're giving it two nuts? Yeah, I know. Well, you started off by explaining it, and I remember you mentioned, because I was watching the two of you, as you were describing it to him, you said, of course one side of the brain deals with symbolism. And as you said the word symbolism, I noticed, Carl, drift away from looking at you, I noticed, Carl, drifted, drift away, drift away, drift away, drift away, drift away, dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dr dri, th. Dr, th. Dr, th. Dr, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. theeee. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. randomly and I thought it was the word symbolism that got him and I noticed you took you just a moment longer and I think

the first thing you say was when did I lose you. Yeah I know I lost him. It's extraordinary and he doesn't even go to disguise it. I think I said nullaicature at one point as well and I knew I was diced you tried to look at up didn't on the web on the spelling. you you you you you you you you you you you the spelling. you the spelling. the spelling. You the spelling. You the spelling. You the spelling. You that's. You that's. You that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. I didn't th. I didn't th. I'd th. I'd thi the first thi thi thi th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd the first th. I'd the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first. I'd the first. I'd the first. I'd the first. I'd the first. I did the first. I did the first. I did the first. I did the first. I did the first. I did the first. I did the first. I'd th. I'd thi thi try try try try try try try try try try try try try thi thi thi thi thi. I'd thi. I'd thi th on the web you didn't find the spelling of it's what what is it again what's the word corpus callosal yeah I can't put from do it no is it probably don't don't bother give up don't bother so any if anyone knows any interesting facts about that that uh I don't but yours but you're tell you the tell you're tell you they was looking for stuff I said put in bonobo he was having no luck with chimp I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I't know much about Benobos. I told him about him. He was looking for stuff. I said put him Bonobo.

He was having no luck with Chimp. And they're a form of chimpanzee, but they're even closer to evolutionally speaking. They've got their social groups that how it works on the evolutionary lad? Chimp Carl. Yeah. Yeah. So we're talking about Benobis. You're excited about that. That's coming up in monkey news?

Uh, no, I think it's a bit of a monkey bonus. Uh, thu. Ha'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'-n'-n'-n'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'n-n-n-n-n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-n'-e-e-e-e-e'-e'-e'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-n'-e'-e'-e'-' I'm like a movie that's a movie of Smove, The Streets on XFM, 1084.9, Mr Javais, Steve Merchant, Carl Pilkington. I think we should kick off with a bit of a competition. I think we should get the listeners involved here. Phone up if you want to play XF FFFFN. Now a lot of people of course won't be familiar with this because we played this in the very early days of XFM. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the we'll th. We' th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I I I I I th. I I I I I I I I I I I th. I I I I I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. F. W. W. F. W. W. F. th. W. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. this because we played this in the very early days of XFM. Do you want to explain the rules or do you just want people to phone in it? It's like family fortunes. We need two of you. Do you remember we discussed this before you can't say that?

Yeah. And so get two on the listeners can't it it really annoys me It is a bit like having a chimp in the room. Do you know I mean Carl? Have you ever seen him eat hot food? No, honestly it is like a chimp. Okay. I'm what you doing? What? What? Just? Oh, God. Or like the cookie monster? Yeah, oh, God. I'm never annoying, Carl? Oh, what? I'm never annoying? Well, what? Well, what? What? What? What? What, what? th? th? th? th? th? th? the? the? the? the? the? the? the? the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, the th, thi, the the thi, thi, thi, the chi, the chi, the chi, the chi, the chi, the chi, the chi, the chi, the chi, the the the the the the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Yeah. I'm never annoying Carl so why are you. Do you what I mean Steve? You're so annoying. Have you been with him for trying to have lunch with Ricky? It's the hardest thing possible. You wander around for hours. Do you

a combination it used to be bad even before he was a celebrity because he has this that a tolerance level I it's extraordinary I mean he is irritated by a car honking its horn in the street. It's like I can't believe it let's go in here I'm so angry. He gets annoyed by police sirens by rain, wind, birds in the air, other people in the streets. They're the most annoyed. Children particularly, whether they're in a school playground we happen to be walking past, whether they're on TV. It's just noise that isn't mine. Well I know, but this is the thing.

You are the most irritating man I've ever met without a shadow of a doubt. I mean you know that car, don't you know that noises he makes he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he. I thano. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. th. tho. I'm th. I'm th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. to. the. the. the. I mean I've been I've been I've been editing some behind-the-scenes footage we shot of making the second series of the office. It's extraordinary. I've had to cut sequences out involving Ricky because they'll just think he's a giver, just think he's an idiot like some kind of puppet that the rest of us are controlling because he's shouting he's whistling he's honking he's making noises, he's dancing around. It's extraordinary. If you're out trying to find somewhere to eat with him, all these irritants, all these annoyances and it's, oh that music's too loud, I don't like that particular song, I'm not going in there, there's more than eight people in that cafe, not going in there.

It's just extraordinary. I think we need a woman. I'm thi I'm thing, I'm thing, I'm thing, I'm thing, I'm thing, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to thi, like, I'm thing, I'm thing, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to thing, to thing, thing, to thing, thing, thing, thing, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi.. I'm that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th just phone back and say, oh sexist. Oh, or a guy. Oh, that's a fella. Oh, sexist. Or a fellow. Just to sco ahead, phone back. I'm thinking of hiring a woman, subservient role. We couldn't hire him, oh no, oh, sexist.

Well, that, or a chance that I'm also paying. It's like paying for it. Exactly. More about board. So if you want to play family fortunes, call up, what's the number? Oh, eight, seven hundred, eight hundred, one, two, three, four? Yeah, it's just like family fortunes, two of you are competing for some great prizes. And I go, um, something you'd, you know, it goes, and then, and go buzz and play it up for it. It's not as high tech as funny fortunes. Current single from Nick Cave from the Bad Seeds that's Bring It On X F. the tf. their fortune Carl Pilginton and two people on the line to play XF family fortunes. Brilliant. Hello. Steve, hello.

Steve, hello. How you're you calling from? From my pub in Barnes? You've got a pub? Yeah. In barns? Are you posh? No.

I suppose they're the local landlord. Do they come in and sort of like go good man there's a there's a shilling get me to mail? They're all poshing barns aren't they? Well no not all of them. There's Nigel Havers come in your pub because he lives there don't he? Well none of them do actually I know there's lots of them about aren't there in Barnes but no but no no you banned them you've banned them. Who's on the the other's on's on's on's on's on's on's on's on's on's on's on's on's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on. Who's on. Who's on. Who's on the other's on. Who's on the other's on the other's on. Who's on the other's on. Who's on the other's on. Who's on the other's on the other's on the other's on the other's on. Who's on. Who's on the other's on. Is is on the other's on the other's on. Is is on the other's on the other's on. is on. Is on. Is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is on. is calling from Forest Hill. Forest Hill, that's right south and I don't go out of WC1. Do you run a pub? Do I own a pub? No. Do you drink in one? Yeah. That's just good. Just from friendly chat there? Yeah. You know the of it determines whether you're straight or gay.

Is that right? I heard. Yeah. So what? You could actually trim it if you fancied. Oh my God. You just interacted with Carl Pilkington. Oh my God.

I treasure that. Right, it's the prizes. Okay now, um, listen, don't be disappointed because as ever, Carl has just gone through some. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I heard. I they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, is that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I they. I they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're that. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've that's. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I I treasure that. Right, here's the prizes. Okay now, listen, don't be disappointed because as ever, Carl has just gone through some people's drawers here at XFM and found some really quite shoddy prizes. So you get on DVD. I don't know if you're a fan of it. Are they a German band? Ramstein? Or Ramstein? Oh, you'll enjoy that. But there's any number. That includes Ash Zu Ashk, Spiel Mitmere, and Heselayid. That's just some of the classics on this DVD of their greatest videos. Red dwarf, the first series... Do you think German sit around looking at how ISIS records and go, look at these Wonder Wall? Possibly so. Well. Best, the very best of the stone roses, although I might have that, so anyway, there's also an I Love You compilation kind of appropriate and a tribute to the Ramones, which quite interesting.

So you can get the idea, Stephen and Jennifer, the stakes are pretty high. Okay here we go, Ex-Family Fortunes. So fingers on the buzzers, just both go, wah! If you think you can answer this right, and the highest-and highest answer or the top answer gets to chance to play or pass If you play you've got to get all five answers. There are five answers Every wrong answer you get a life and I go BZ and when you get three when you lose three lifelines that the other person can steal it's as simple as that if you've seen the show family fortunes no this. No, this is a new this is not this is not this is not this is not this is not this is not this is not based this is not based this is not based this is not based this is not based this is not based this is a new this is not based on anything I've ever seen never in my life. Okay right fingers on the buzzers okay name something we asked eight of my mates right something you associate with Carl Pilkington

where? Okay Jennifer what? Silliness yeah that's the top arts a thick or dimness do you want to play play or pass? Play please okay okay stay stay tune Stephen because you might be able to stick or she gets three wrong. Okay. Right, okay. Right, we've got a top answer, four to go. Thick or dimness is top answer obviously. Okay, Jennifer, some other things associated with Carl? Um... You don't even know who he is? No, she does. You must do.

And, bizarrely, she knows that silliness or stupidity? Yeah, come on, something else. Um, there's smelly eyebrows. Pee-puh. Peeh-puh. One more wrong answer and then Stephen gets a chance to steal. Okay, I don't know. Um...

People are screaming at home. Very sensible. Oh, was that very sensible? Yeah. Okay, Stephen, can you think of one of the answers that Jennifer didn't get? It must be a mind for a name nonsense. Oh, well, I'm going to give you think of one of the answers that Jennifer didn't get? Must be a mind for a name nonsense. Oh well I'm going to give you that because number five is even thicker. So yeah what you missed is the tough answer was thick or dim. Second top answer was Manchester.

Third was Rounded. Fourth was Airy Chinese kid and five was even thicker. So I think Stephen's the win there. Yeah I think he's done well. Yeah. You enjoy Ramstein and you get some Stone Roses and an I Love You CD. So that's the pilot for this show, okay? When blockbusters all over, this we're going to phase in Ex-Family Fortunes. Carl, thoughts? It's not that good. Why? It's not that good, is it? Why? It's not, it's not that good. Just... I'm not that happy with it. Why? Why? Yeah.

Oh, I'm just... What else? What? What? Now... You're definitely right about that top answer. Well, thanks. Right, um, so Stephen wins all those prizes? Yeah. Stay al-Ilaid we'll take your address. And we'll send something that top answer. Well, thanks. Right, so Stephen wins all those prizes. Stay aliga and we'll take your address. And we send something to Jennifer as well for even bothering to talk to Carl. What's this, Carl? What are you playing now? That's a bad-drawn boy. Yeah, excellent. Bye.

Do you want to do rock bostress for the moment on XKM, 104.9, the best he'd mentioned, Carl Pilkington. Right, Carl, moving on. Got a lot to crumb in. If you yawn again or pick your teeth or chew, ah, oh, God. Can I just, you know, sometimes I get told off by Carl, he gets a little bit sulky if I slag off the prizes that he sources each competition. This is from Rob in Croydon. He's a former winner of Rockbusters. He said he didn't even know what the prizes were going to be when he entered. He won and

sure enough for one not only he was a hero. The following morning, it was just Robb again and all I had a show from my triumph. Are five compilation CDs I'll never listen to. And two DVDs I'll perhaps get nine pounds for on eBay. Please get some decent prizes. Rickey their their their you're doing. How many of your listeners really are into Stephen Polyakov's The Lost Prince? No one, that's how many. Now that is a winner. That's someone who's got a reason to like us and like you. I think he's got the same attitude as Steve when you give him something for free. Yeah. Yeah. Sorted you out with N.R.D. Tickets. A lot of their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. tip. tip. tip. tip. tip. today. today. today. today. today. today. today. the the the the the the the theERD tickets for last night. A lot of messing around, a lot of phoning round going on to get your them tickets. Coming today. You enjoy the gig, couldn't be bothered going Carl. Typical.

Yeah. I didn't say I couldn't be bothered going to go with us, I see fit. You just pursue, you just assume, it's assumed, assumed, assumed, once you've given me the tickets, they are mine to do with as I see fit. The thing, what annoys me is right, I bet he hasn't even listened to them CDs, he might find some more there. No, that's his point, I think. To be fair. But I don't want to give them stuff that's too good because then they'll listen to CDs instead of XFM.. You always got an answer. Oh, Carl, you're my hero. We don't care, do we, Carl?

Well, I think the prizes are all right, considering what they've got to do. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, right. It's just a bit of fun for God's sake. So, uh... Please do not blaspheme on air. Something else we're giving away. Go on. The Shining.

It's more throwing away, isn't it? Once again, it's on VHS. Just because you buy it out of your own money, Carl, stop being so mean. And I want to watch it tonight, because it's one of those films that... So you're going to watch this video and then you're going to send it to someone as a prize. Yeah it's one of them thick films that I was sorry you just said yes to that without blinking. Oh yeah. You don't think like Les Dennis doesn't have a quick go in the car on Family Fortune. It costs 599 Carl. Okay this is Carl in the classic The Shining The Shining. And what's the question?

Well, we might ask that afterwards. Okay, then. Yes. Good. Funny, someone told me the other day, weird thing about a typewriter. The top row of letters, the longest word you can write is typewriter. I'll just show you. Just... Just... That's weird, isn't it? It's just...

The typewriter being... you're not in the movie. You're in one of those grouchy moods again, that you get into when you're right. You're not being grouchy, I just want to finish my work. Yeah, I don't know, just, she's being a bit funny, a bit of fun than that. Let me explain something to you. Whenever you come in here and interrupt me, you're breaking my concentration, distracting me and it will then take the time to get back to where I was. Understand?

Yeah, but I just was coming in and I try and cheer you up, you know, if you...I'm full of ideas as well, you know, if you're having a problem coming up with stuff, loa loads of ideas you could write about. The other day I read about this Airy Chinese kid. What do you want me to do about it? No, it's just that it could make a good book, do you know what I mean? Sort of following round. Uh, well, I'd buy it, you know, but if you don't want to know, don't bother doing it. But... Do you know what I mean? Just... Area Chinese kid is weird because they're not normally that area over there.

Yet, this kid caked in it. But if you don't care... I wouldn't touch one hair on his head. You don't have to touch any hair on his head. Like I say, he's covered. Leave the head alone if you want. Touch touch, touch, touch, touch, touch, touch, to to th, th, th, th, th, th, to th, th, th, th, to to to to th, th. to to to to to tho, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't their thoom- their, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't their their their. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't. Don't, don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't their. Don't touuu. Don't touu. Don't touch, tou-a. Don't totea. Don't toua. Don't totea. Don't toua. Don't touch, touch, toue. Don I say, he's covered. Leave the head alone if you want. Touch his hands. He's totally covered in it, but... I love the little son of a bitch. Don't go that far. You haven't met him, but I can sort it. I'll do anything for him. I don't think you'll write a book on him yeah how do you think you can handle it yeah not too busy are you well yeah I'm

pretty busy I've got to sort out some some monkey facts for the show this Saturday but I reckon I can still start right now and get out of here all right I will. You're gonna be like that? I couldn't borrow a pen, could I? See you later. There you go. Haunting.

Haunting stuff there. Carpilchton in the shiny. You know in the film Jack Nicholson goes crazy because the suggestion is he's maybe possessed by demons that maybe are in the, in the film Jack Nicholson goes crazy because the suggestion is he's maybe possessed by demons that maybe are in the hotel. But you know if I was stranded in a desolate hotel, removed from all human contact with Carl, I'd go mental with an axe without being possessed by demons. That's more chilling to me. Trying to get some work done and you keep wandering in. I'm trying to get Carl to spend a couple of days in the caravan with me just for the hell of it and he won't. I'm offered him money, I think it would be

a great laugh, Carl. Oh yeah, great. That would be terrifying. No, I want to film it. I just want to film it. Like a little video diary, there's Carl there, he's just waking up. If I was stranded that that would thin thin that would be, thi, thi, th. That would be, thi, thi, thi, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thi, I thin, I thin, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I tho, I tho, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. I th. I th. I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, I thin, thin, th. tho. thinger and Jason Ball Heats. That's more scary. The thing is, Ricky doesn't mess you about as much as he messes me about. No, you see you've given him an inch, and he's taken a yard. 1230 you got in today. In 30 minutes between 1230 and 1, the old bin lid on the head, he wanted to do that again. Yeah. that again, yeah, squeezing my head, think he had a go at and karate chop on the back of the neck, yeah all in 30 minutes. Who else can say that?

Who else can say that? What do you mean? Anyway have we got a question now? Yeah to win a copy of I'm so embarrassed to say it the shining on VHS is worth 599 and it will have already been watched by Car Bumpton, probably not even rewound. Yeah, to win that. A little bit of tripe and cowills, just slipped into his dinner. A barbake outside. As he was reading the back of the box trying to figure out what was going on, the ingredients. To whip, here's a question. No go on. I'm here Carl's first. Okay. No, it's about the film. Because when I was whizzing through it, I saw something

I saw something and thought, oh that's good. The kid who's in it, he was writing something on the back of a door with lipstick. What was it? Well that's a tricky question I can't remember. So the kid in it was the kid was writing. the kid was writing. the the kid was writing. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. the the the th. thi. thi. thi. the th. the the th. the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the the the the the the it was writing something on the back of the door. Let's see if, I mean I wouldn't be surprised if there's somebody. Right, the phones are going so it might be. Yeah but this is email on that. All right. Ricky Dr. Javais at XFN. Code UK. What was being scrawled on the back of the door by the little kid in the shining? Be honest if you know that it means it you probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably probably you probably you probably probably probably you probably you probably probably probably you probably you probably you probably you probably already got it and you've watched it about eight times. Yeah. Fair enough though. All right. Bob Dylan, you're going to make me lonesome when you go on XFM. Sorry, they're arguing. Steve and Carl are arguing about. Do you know, can I just tell them what you're arguing about? Think of this, right? This is the argument. They're arguing whose fault it is why this show is rubbish. Think of that! What? That's the proof of

that? I think that's a valid criticism. At least we're discussing it. You're just accepting that that's the case. You're not even trying to change it. We're ashamed of it. Yeah. Who ever liked it? I should be, but I quite like it. In fact, I remember, remember when we went out about two weeks ago and we've got to you know make it tighter and that make it good. Went out for something to eat you you were happy sat at the table talking about squids and having to you know go off we want if you want to tell the kid I brought up the topic right what we're going to do about the show suddenly you've got to go got a go. It's like, oh I think I've made plans. So me and Steve sat there can help with stuff. See I do that, I do, I do acknowledge quite shamefully that this is more enjoyable for me to do than for you to listen to, but it's like

it's like two hours sort of playtime for me. It's like you know the study period when you're meant to read a book but you actually can't afford to run around and draw pictures. I think that's even though I'm getting paid for this and I'm meant to be working it's nice it's cool isn't it? Not for the listener but for me. But the problem is the only way we can make this good is if the three of us resign and they replace th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their the the thr-I the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thin the the. the the the the is the is the is the is the is the is the is the is the is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to toeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. the. can make this good is if the three of us resign and they replace it with someone else. Yeah, but Carl, you're getting flustered and you're getting stressed because you're, you know, I don't know what, I was saying, answer the phone, you're letting them ring, you're still letting it ring.

You're still letting people phone, you go, leave that. And people have phoned in, good enough to phone, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, to, and, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, they. And, they. And, they. And, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you. And, you. And, you. And, you. And, to, to, to, th. And, th. And, tha, thr. And, you're, thr. to be, try. to, to, try. to, to, try, to, to, to, whilst I'm doing all the other stuff maybe you can do that. No way. Right then. No way. But to be fair Rick I'm not I'm not accusing you of being lazy but you're sat on a chair and yet you're almost vertical. I don't know how you've done it. It's like you're almost asleep but you're sat on an outright chair. I don't know how you've actually angled. I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm to to an the the to an to an to an to an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an a th. I'm th. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not th. I'm not th. I'm not th. I'm not th. I'm not th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I've th. I'm not th. I'm not th. I'm not th. I'm not thee. I'm not theateat. I'm not th. I'm not theeateat. I'm not th. I'm not the. I'm not the. I'm not the. I'm not th. I'm not back when I'm in old age, I'm just going to be bent double. So come on now, pretend we're starting now. Okay, we've just started the show now. Yeah, it's 2 o'clock. It's XFM. It's the Ricky Gerva show with Steve Merchant and Carl Pilkington or our show. It's our show. know? Funny thing happened to me on the way here. Okay. Actually it was about Wednesday or Thursday I was walking along, I was walking on

a chair and I was on my way here actually to meet Carl for a drink and this little fellow came up to him. I think it was an overseas student he sort of like a student type but he had an accent and he came up to me and excuse me I used to use one I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to go. I was to to go. I was walking. I was walking. I was walking. I was walking. I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was was I was I was was was I was I was I was I was I was was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was to. the the the the the the the the the the the yeah he went, would you sign the script book of the office for me? I went, yep by all means yeah he went, can you come to the bookshop? And I went, what are you haven't got on you? He went, no but if you come I will buy one for you to sign and I went I can't really, were you going you going to pass one? I went, I'm not known, I can't. He went, and he went, and he went, and he went, oh, I was just doing waterstones earlier, I didn't, I didn't buy, I went, oh sorry, he went, you could just, I can't, he went, okay. I went, I'll sign something else. If you got something else I can tie and he he he he he he he he he he he he he he to to to to to to sign, he to sign, he to sign, he to sign, he to sign, he to sign, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I'll to to to to th. He to to to to to to to to, I'll to to to to to th. I'll to th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll to, I'll to, I'll to, I'll to th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll thin, I'll thin, I'll thoo, I'll thoooooooooooo. I'll to the. I'll thooooooo. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th, okay. I went, I'll sign something else, if you've got something else I can tie and he went, of course. And I signed a pamphlet or a brochure or something for him. But I love the idea, imagine me going with him, I'm queuing up and I'm in the cue,

he's going, uh, you're going, yeah, fine, can you just hurry up and he goes can you let me 10 pounds? I mean imagine that. I'm a little bit annoyed you didn't go with him frankly because that would have been a sale of our book and I get a little cut from that. Well behind him was Salman Rushdie going can we hurry up because I've read I shouldn't be out. I'm getting a lot of funny looks and I really, you know I don't feel comfortable comfortable. I thought it was very odd the day we were walking along and I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm th, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th... th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, th. th. th. thi, thi, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th't feel comfortable. But I thought it was very odd the other day, we were walking along and Ricky often gets bothered for an autograph and some Japanese people who I think were tourists, kind of, they appeared from behind the corner and I thought, this is odd that, you know, they seemed like, you know, they seemed like, you know, they seemed like, you know, they thinking, right. So now Ricky stood in the street, people are recognising him as he's taking a photo of

three complete Japanese strangers. And I imagine them getting home and Sarah will say, and here's the one we had taken by Ricky Javais, taken with Ricky Javais, no taken by Ricky Javais. From the office? Isn't that brilliant? Would you come to the bookshop with me? A life of a minor celebrity. Not really. Times like these, Foo Fighters and XFM, 104. 9.9. Carl, this build-up to Monkey News. Do you want to give the competition answer and winner? Yeah, we did the bit on the

shining, me acting out in that. And the question was, the kid in the film, the shining, yeah, after like the devil had gotten him and that. This isn't written out, is it? You're just winning this, aren't you? No, but I remember it. But you haven't seen the film, though, have you? But you've seen the film, though, have you've seen, though, the thrown, the film, the thinne.

. How are you presenting the competition? It's just like Jonathan Ross on film 2003. Well I'm just just saying right so the kids there in the bedroom and he's got his man's lipstick and he's saying... It doesn't run a mobile deed? Nope. And he said that he wrote down red rum on the back of the door and his man wakes up and thinks what's he doing? And she looks at him she goes oh and then she looks in the mirror and sees red rum in the mirror. Right. Which is sort of... He's offering racing tips. It says murder in the mirror. So Kelly in Omslow got that right so... Excellent. After I've watched the film I'll be whizzing that over it's a brilliant. I mean the one thing I do like about this show for all its faults is the... Honesty?

Yeah. I mean that can be good and bad. I mean it's... I mean some people would think it's sloppy, arrogance, laziness, you know. You know, thoughtless. Yeah. But I like to think it's honesty. It's like a peek into the mind and workings of Carl Pilkinton. He just said to me because he was shaking because he said to me, I quote, he said, oh, he's just a wintering to himself. I must remember

to eat next time Suzanne's away. I know. I must remember to eat next time Suzanne's away. No, but you do, I mean, I wonder if I lived on my own if I'd still be about. Because I just neglect myself. So I mean all I've eaten... A lot of self-abuse is that what I said I had lasagna last night that I messed up right? Why did you mess up? I cut it for too long. It was like a brick right? And she called up and said have you eaten no hint yet? Was it nice? Was it nice? I thought, I don't want her to worry, because she's probably been out and had a good meal with all the work people. I didn't want to say, well, you know. And she went, okay, bye, and I go to that car, I'm

I bet he cooked it like a brick. I bet you threw it away. Anyway, do it and the scotch pancakes for breakfast that is all I've had. So I'm starving I'm shaky. Plus I've got that restless leg syndrome still going on which I can't get rid of. What's restless leg syndrome? I find if I go to bed right my body's tired but my legs aren't. Are you like Michael Flatley? You have to get him do a bit of tap dancing? Do they just keep going even when you're asleep? You just keep moving about so I have to get up and stretch that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if that if I that if I the their their their their their their their their their their their their th. their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I' th. I's th. I th. I their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. I's th. I' to to to the. I' to to theei tea. I'm tea. I'm tea. I's te. I's te. I's the. I's the. I's th. I'm to get him do a bit of tap dancing. Do they just keep going even when you're asleep? Just keep moving about so I have to get up and stretch him or something. Or I've worked out that if I put a pillar on like the bedpost down at the other end, if I have my legs higher than my heart, it calms it down a bit. Is this why Suzanne works away so often? I don't I don't. It's that's why. It's why. It's why. It's why. It's why. It's why. It's thu thus thus thus th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thus thus th th thus to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I' the. I' the. I' the. the. the. the. the. the. the the the. the. the. the. I the. I' to to to to to the. I's down to Smarty's and that it's like a sugar thing but stuff eating him. Apparently Bob Morton has got it as well. Now he's got arthritis. was he? You told me the week that you've mastered moon walking? Yeah yeah I can

do that. Is that one of the things you did like in the middle of the night? It's this it's moon sleep walking yeah he just gets out he finds out he finds and wakes up and goes, oh God, I'm brilliant. I'm brilliant at this. Right, so, listen what we're doing now, are we getting a debate going about, actually right? Go on. Go on. No, no. You can help me out here, Carl.

You've got an idea. I can see it in your eyes. He's got a brilliant idea, wait for it go on no no it's something when I was looking on the web yeah found something out gone it's a story about a woman who had a baby who had a baby what are you talking about a what a woman who had a baby a baby it was having a baby. It was no clear when you repeated it. No, Carl, I don't know what to do for the common good, right?

Pursue this line of inquiry, right? Because I don't know where it's going, or play a record. I am actually torn. I don't know what to do. No, I remember seeing it and thinking I've got to tell Ricky about that. It's brilliant. What should we do? Should we go with it? I mean, it's entering into the abyss. It's opening Pandora's box. It's peeking, it's going down to the cellar. I've got a couple of questions, though. Go on then. Well, come down there with. the cell. the cell. the cell. the the the cell. the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho, what tho, what tho, what tho, what tho, what tho, what should thathea. tho, what should th. th. What should th. What should th. What should th. What should th. What should th. What should th. What should th. What should. What should. What should. What should. What should. What should. What, what should. to. What, what, what th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. th. to. the. to thr. to thr. thr. thr. to, what throooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. What. What the. Okay right, Carl. What, what, first of all it was on the web, what do you mean? The baby was what, had another, was it, she didn't give birth, the doctor didn't find one of those set of Chinese dolls up her, Russian dolls, whatever they called. That's what I pictured it like, those, those dolls where you tap the ed off and there's another one in there that all look the same.... the same, but the same, but the same, but the same, but the same, but the same, but the same, but the same, the same, the same, the same, the same, the same, the same, the same, the same, the same, the same, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was their, she was their, she was their, she was their, she was their, she was their, she was their, she was their, she was, she was, she was their, their, she, their, their, their, she was their, their, she was their, their, their, their, their, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their, she didn't, she didn't, she didn't, she was, she was, she who's... Now don't just say it again, that's a headline. That's not a story. There was a woman who had a baby, who had a baby. That's not a story. Imagine handing that in as a thesis to loads of the BMA. There's that, there's a children's

rhyme. Yeah, there was a woman who had a baby, what do you mean? So the baby, she had a baby who had a baby what do you mean so the baby she had a baby yeah yeah that bit is fine we're okay with that's normal that's normal that woman had a child don't need no she gave birth fine yeah next well I don't know that much more apart from the fact that the baby is like roaming about and then 12 months later she's like oh interesting so the gestation period of the that baby was actually three months more than an adult that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's that's normal that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal the the the the the the the the the the tho. that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's normal that's Interesting, so the gestation period of that baby was actually three months more than an adult. Yeah. Excellent.

Weird though, isn't it? So, was the headline, my baby's 12 months pregnant? What are you talking about? What are you talking about? What are you talking about? No, you haven't even finished the story. That was you said, and 12 months later, you didn't even finish the sentence. So what do you mean? No, I didn't, I didn't read any more into it because I just saw that and I thought, what?

That's weird and then I just was thinking, oh, like imagine the kid at school, at parents evening. Ha their kid. Go on. And it's like, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, when, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. th. thi. that, th. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, I, that, I, that, I. that, I. that, I. that, I. that, that, that, I. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's, that's, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, a look at your work sort of thing. Don't you think that'd be weird? But what? Did the child have a baby? Yeah. Because it didn't! Play record!

We shouldn't have gone down in the center. We should have just left the center door and closed. I never learned. That's the zombies and a song called Time of the Season. I've enjoyed that. I think of zombies, Carl? It's all right, yeah. No, not the group, but the, oh, the living dead. Don't worry about them. No? Why? Not about they?

Not about they? that, it's not happen. You don't believe in that. theyl happen? Yes. Right, well I'll find the thing again, I'll print it off and you're reading. Well, all I'm saying is there's more information that we need. Yeah. But it always annoys me that when I do get the information, you'll go, yeah, but it's named Sally, you didn't say that and make out... No? As if... No, no, no, no, don't make it look like we're we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that we're that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that that that. that that that. that that that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. We that. that. that. that that. We that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. the most abominable things man has ever uttered and you expect us to accept them.

Usually headlines, usually illogical, not just probably wrong. So fleas are born pregnant. Are they? Okay. On we go. See that's true and you're not impressed because it doesn't involve a little werewarf child or half-man half shark. you're just not, it's just not, it's the, them. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. It's. It's. It's. Usually. It's, it. Usually. It's, it. Usually. Usually. It's, it. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. Usually. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. to. the. to. to. the. to. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. Usually. the. the. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. the, the, usually, you.'t involve a little werewolf child or half man half shark. You're just not it's not good enough for you. No but why I if I read the first line or something and it's not not

that interesting to go next right and I move on. Now when I saw a woman had a baby and it had a baby I go... but you still didn't read on. No but all right I didn't read on but it got me thinking. Like I said it's you wonder about the parents evening I was thinking about you know is it a good thing because you're going to spend more time with the kid. Do you know what I mean? There's a lot of moms have to go out of work and that she's going to be a great man. Grue to thrown thatthe their thu. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. their their their their their their their their their their their their thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. their thi. thi. thi. thi. to to the. to to to thee. the. thee. the. the. their their their their their're not going to be a great mom. I just wonder if, I know it sounds weird, but if it was it, was it, you know the baby that woman had, was that a girl or a boy? It would have been a girl, wouldn't it? Of course it would be mental wouldn't it? It would have been a weird story, wouldn't it? So anyway, that reminded me because we were talking about other amazing stuff that Ricky Ricky, Ricky me to find out about. Steve, are you aware of bonobos?

We mentioned them earlier, I'm not particularly familiar with bonobos. It sounds like a cream cake. Now they're a sort of a chimpanzee, but more advanced than the traditional chimpanzee, they live in one sort of particular area. And, you know, it's the sort of closest animal, to the missing, to, to, their, their, their, their, their, think, think, thi, thi, they's a they's a they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, thi, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, they're, thi, they're, they're, thi, they're, thi. It's, thi. It's, thi, thi. It's, thi, thi, thin, their, thin, their, their, their, to, to, to, to, tooomomoomorrow, tooomorrow, tooomorrow, tooomorrow, tooomorrow, tooomorrow, to, that, that, that's the sort of closest animal to the missing link. They're very intelligent. They take on a lot of social aspects of human. They have sex for pleasure and no other. Steve's looking annoyed. He's done ya.

So what did you find out about? Apparently I found out it's 98% not human, it's nearly human thing, it's nearly human but it's not. We share 98% of DNA with it. Yeah, 98%. It's a higher percentage than you. They have sex or pleasure. They do look a bit like him though. They've got a little round head, haven't they? And they're much more upright than the, you know, got a more flexible.

I sort of get bored with animals that I like class as being intelligent right so when you turn up... I thought they're not doing enough they're not playing Nintendo. Do you know like that people always rave on about dolphins? Oh they're really bright and that you know I was having an argument with Susan about it and she goes oh yeah dolphins are really intelligent and I said but what what what have they done? So she said, well, they use them in wars, they strap bombs to the back to go out to boats, so they blow up the boat. Yeah. Yeah, they're trained, yeah. Well, isn't that bright? If it was really bright, I'm not doing that. Well, now they leave them. They don't blow them, they're angry. Anyway, so, so Benobos and really bright in that now I

was looking at them and they are you know they're just like humans basically right what I was thinking is I don't have a chance to ask you if you got a mentalist right an and put the bonobo in a exam what if you got okay okay to the the the the the the the the the the the the and put the bonobo in an exam. Okay, right, okay, what do you mean a mentalist? What do you mean? Well, you know, someone who's, you know, a little bit, just a little bit slower than me, and put him in an exam, what would happen? Right, okay, you've got to be clearer here, Carl. What are you you saying? Are you saying pit the wits of a bonobo against someone who's educationally

subnormal? Yeah, what do you reckon? I don't know where to start. No, but if they're that good why aren't they being used in labour and stuff? Do you know what I mean? What's it? What do you mean? In the government? No, like, you know, like some jobs that they could do. Why haven't someone caught onto it and thought, well, hang on a minute.

Sorry, I'm not familiar with the bonobo. Seriously, could it do a job of work? How advanced are these creatures? Lots of animals do job of work. I think Carl wants this bonobo to start going to work with an umbrella and a bowler hat and have sort of like rudimentary language skills like morning. Morning. So I couldn't employ the bonobo to be my PA. It's not, I mean how advanced are they? Could I teach you to go in the shops and collect something and bring it up? Yeah, but you can teach a dog to do that. It depends what you mean

by intelligence, social interaction, also dexterity capability, you know. Could it produce this show? Yes, I thought it could randomly. Just mean what you mean is it kind of could a chimp be a thick human at an intelligence test? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. But it depends on what the problem with the human is, doesn't it? First of all mental illness is nothing to do with intelligence. Let's get that straight. That's one thing. Mental people aren't necessary less or intelligent the people. Now is that the

clinical term? Well exactly. Mentalist. Sometimes I don't know what to do. I don't know whether to start with where he's going wrong with the question to answer it, to find out what he really means. Because it's just that if that did happen right. Did what what could happen? You want the planet age don't you? Here go. Go on. I go to school. the the their. I. I. I their. I. I their. I their. I to to their. I to to their. I their. I their. I their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm the. I'm the the the the the the the the the the t. t. t. t. te. te. Go on. I go to school, I go to a new school, I'll go in the class, this three bonobos sat on the back row. Yeah. Right? I think it would make everybody, everybody would work harder because you go, well I don't want a monkey beating me. Whereas when I was using school. They seem they'd be an incentive. Yeah. they're they're they're to, I'd to, I'd to, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I go, I go, I go, I go, I go, I go, I go, I go, I go, I go, I go, I go, I go, I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the their, go, go, go, go, to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the their, I go, I go, I was you think they'd be an incentive? Yeah. Well I, yeah, I said, okay, they're going to go, go on. What do you mean? No, I would have loved it because I mean one of the reasons I didn't like school is it's like, oh I'm not bothered. You know, I'm not bothering going in today.

I'd love it if I went in and someone you, maybe making you do their homework. Yeah, yeah. Have you been copying the bonobos? Have you been copying the bonobos? Have you been copying the bonobos? Have you been copying Boobo again? I think the good thoughthough, on it. Well, it'd be great. I wish I could live in your mind for just a day. It must be great when you walk around and see things. We were talking before, right, about at school for some... I can't remember why it came up, the frog thing. But they did a... Oh, I tell you what it was, it's the March that's on today, right? And you know if people want to do that, that's fair enough, but I don't like going out

in big crowds and what have you? Sure. He said, he said there's too many people to get anything done. He said I wouldn't do anything with more than five people. Do you know what I mean Sliad to the night? Do you do. the they. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Sli's. Sli's, I, I the their, I their, I th. th. their, I th. thi. Sli. S. I th. I don't th. I don't like, I don't like, I don't like, I don't like, I don't like, I don't like, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I that, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I don't like, I don't like, I don't like, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't their. I don't, I don't their. S. Sot. If. I don't th. Sot. If th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th th thi. I don't th th thi. I don't like, there's more than five of you, you can't talk to everyone, who's in charge of the night, it makes it hard work if you want to nip into a restaurant because you've got to get like a table for six. Yeah. So if you're on that march today and you want to get a table of a the bill afterwards. Yeah, I've never deserved it. Let's just split it a million ways. Should you split it a million ways? Well I didn't have a starter. I need to pay with switch. I didn't have a starter. Can I pay on switch? Before you know, war breaks out? They're fighting amongst themselves. Dubs, there goes the fear. We've got a crack on here. We've got to get in rock busters. We've got to get a rock b. the their their their their their their to get a to get a to get a rock b. to get a rock b. to get a crack. to get a crack. to get a crack. to get a crack. to get a crack. to get a crack. to get to get to get to get to get a crack, to get to get to get to to their. to their. their. their. I've their. I've their. I've to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. I I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I've got to their. I've got their. I've their. S. S. S. the their. the tape. tape. the the the the their. the their. their. their. their. to. to. S. to their. to get in rockbusters and a couple more tracks Ricky Givai, Steve Merchant, Carl Pilkington, Carl Go for it, this is Rockbusters, the last ever rockbusters. Right, yeah, it's a accents special one today.

I've done it before in the past using Accent, the thanks, so yeah. Three cryptic clues, initials, email then you can win. Do the email address now so then, so then, then,, Ricky dot Jomase at XFM.coat at UK, right? Yeah. Right, first one. The northern lad remembers he had to tell his ma'am's daughter something. God, dearing me. The northern lad remembers he had to tell his ma'am's door to something. That's O, the initial O there. Yeah, I've got it. the northern. the northern. the northern. the northern. the northern. th. th. th. th. That's. th. th. th. th. th. That's. th. That's. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. th. thiol. th. thiol. thiole. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. It's the the the the the the th. the the th. the thooooooo. the the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th.. th initial oh there think of a band yeah yeah yeah

yeah okay that's easy go on that second one the person from Birmingham got a C in their degree right the person from Birmingham got a C in their degree the initial there is T you don't get A B or C with your degree well and the final one the cockney fella isn't happy everything's going wrong that's DH the initials there D H so very quickly the northern the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the northern th th th th th th th that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th's th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the tho-n' the tho-n' tho-n' the the the the 't happy. Everything's going wrong. That's D-H. The initials there, D-H. So very quickly, the Northern lad remembers he had to tell his ma'am's daughter something. God, they're not going to get the second one. Oh.

Second one, the person from Birmingham got a C-in their degree. Initial The. everything's going wrong D-H emailing Ricky Dochervace, XFM.coat at UK and win some stuff. Is it important that they bear in mind the accents? Does the accent help them? Of course it will, yeah, yeah. Well course it will, not necessarily course. Yeah. So, do that. Right, right. A Valentine special, letter to mine, you're one of the greatest love songs ever and you've got a couple of minutes. then then then ththing is we haven't even done monkey news? Oh god, right? There's nudists going about playing bowls

which we didn't get round to. Are they? Yeah. God. Why are they doing that? They got fell up with volleyball? I don't know, it annoyed me when I read it. But we'll leave that, maybe we can come back to? they up to? Um, some, some, some, they've got to be careful when they're smoking a pipe and bowling if they're nude. Do you know how like nudists annoy me? I saw it in the week that, um... Sorry, what was the monkey news? thrown? Sorry, what into the record? What the monkey use is it quick? Yeah. I can tell it to you quick. Quick then? Right. Jingle. Oh chimpanzee that! Go.

Chambles. Hurry up! There's a monkey in India, right? On a railway station, waiting for the train. Don't mess it out because I've got to get through it quick. There's monkeys sat there and this robber knicks somebody's handbag or something goes running off down the platform. The police are chasing them. Monkey steps in, trips the fella up, pins him down, police come and arrest the fella. He tripped over the monkey. He tripped over the monkey. The monkey was waiting for a treeing the the the the the the the treeing the treeing the the the the monkey treeing the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey thin monkey the monkey thin monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey the monkey up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up the monkey the the the the the the monkey the the the the the monkey the the monkey th. tho thin monkey tip. tip. tip. tri- monkey's monkey's trips. trips. tip. tiped the tip. the the the the the the monkey's the monkey's the monkey's the monkey's fella. He tripped over the monkey. Okay, play a record. He didn't. He

tripped over the monkey. The monkey was waiting for a train. He tripped over the monkey. Did he check the timetable? Okay, leave it. Letter to have a try and he, by David Bowery. Well, we're all getting stressed here. We're going to run out of time again. We haven't we haven't had we haven't the answer the answer their their their their their we haven't their we haven't had we haven't had their. We haven't had to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have train. We haven't had trien. tripe. tripeck. We've tripe. tripick. tripic. tripped. tripped. tripped. tripped. tripped. tripped. tripip. tripip. train. train. train. train. train. train. train. train. train. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. tripe. tripe. tripe. tripe. tripe. tripe. tripe. tripe. triped trip. Hea. tripe. Hea'e. Hea' to pack in. You did it on purpose. What? What do you mean? I did it on purpose. I love Rockbusters. I think it's the highlight of the week. But I remember in the early days of Rockbusters, we used to get reams of emails. Do you know how many we've had today? Two.

Yeah, because we've just done it in the last. about it and do research. They have to guess because it... I don't think XF and family fortunes is going to be a suggest. Don't knock XF family fortunes Carl. It ran on ITV for years. Yeah so has anyone got any white Carl? What we'll have to... just as well we haven't got any prizes to give away anyway because he gave away our next roof. We have coming through now let's's see, just hang on a minute. Well, this isn't radio. You can't just sit here looking at a computer screen going, hold on, hold on, that isn't radio. Right, well it'll have to be the one who got the closest, right?

Okay, what, who got the closest, what are the closest, what are the closest, the last one ever. This is the last, I promise it's the last rockbuster ever. The Northern lad remembers he had to tell his ma'am's daughter something. That was O. Yeah, I know that. What was it? Oasis? Oasis? No, yeah? Oh, yeah. So that was a nigh. Oh, that works though. Go on. Go on. What's the next one?. That was T. Go on. Toto. Toto. Toto. Well, no. Did anyone get that? Toto? A C as well. A C? A C. Toto. Yeah. Yeah. I just saw it on an email. Someone that? I was the last one. I love. Last one. The cockney fellow isn't happy. Everything is going wrong. No. No. Did the initials. thi. the thi. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. th. th. th. the th. the th. the the th. the the the the the the th. the the the th. C. C. C. C. C. th. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. T. T. C. T. T. T. C. T. T. C. T. T. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C.that. That's the last one. Last one. The Cockney fella isn't happy. Everything is going wrong. Going back in time a bit.

The initials D.H. Going back in time a bit? Yeah, for the song. It's not a sort of one. Oh right. I was not a number. Cockney fell. That was Dan Hill. Dan Hill. Right? Darnill. Nobody got that one. That's a tricky one, but Steve, do you want to pick someone who got a couple? I mean, I imagine Dan Hill was

on everyone's lip. I mean, I'm sorry, I think I know about music, but I don't know who Dan Hill is. Sometimes when we toucest. Yeah, the honest is would get downhill. Did anyone get it downhill? Well, I don't know. Steve, you are just... I'm not going to check. I can't be bothered. I'm just want to celebrate that it's over. I'm just pleased that we're finished with rockbusters. What? Right. Did anyone get it? I've got to check. I've got to check. I want to hear that answer again! What? Carl, leave the mouse alone and let me find that one. That is someone's contempt for you. They've put Oasis? Fair enough. Second one, Travis, they've just gone. Third one, Oliver Hardy. They don't care. That's how much contempt people have. That's what's the answer?

NERD? Yeah. Provider. Oh, I hope the ceremonies weren't listening to that. I'm not going to be here next week. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, the. Oh, the. Oh, the. Oh, the. Oh, the. Oh, the. Oh, the. Oh. I'm not going to come in for a couple weeks. Okay, no, no, leave it a couple weeks. Yeah, I think we should just take a break. Everyone should just take a break. Do a special or a best off Carl because this is, well I've got to go away, rethink this whole thing because I think it's actually probably damaging our reputation. Definitely. Definitely. What you do next week? You're going. the next. to to to to to to to to to the next. to to the the the to the the the the the the the the the the the next. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. th. th. the. the. the. 't give the winners the competition we've I mean it's oh see that yeah yeah I'm not gonna be here