The Ringer NFL Show - Mega Mailbag: Tush Push Ban, Best Draft Fits, Purdy in Pittsburgh, and Torpedo Bats

Episode Date: March 31, 2025

The guys start by reacting to the news that the tush push might be banned and why it would be a soft rule change (1:19). Next, they open up the mailbag to answer the most burning draft-related (and non-draft-related) listener questions on everything from the most intriguing team and player fit to why the Cowboys should entertain trading Dak Prescott (13:52). Check out our 2025 Ringer NFL Draft Guide here! Email us! [e-mail] The Ringer is committed to responsible gaming. Please visit www.rg-help.com to learn more about the resources and helplines available. Hosts: Danny Heifetz, Danny Kelly, and Craig Horlbeck Producers: Kai Grady and Carlos Chiriboga Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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or wherever you get your podcasts. Worldwide. The Ringer NFL Draft show. My name is Danny Hyphenson. I'm joined by Danny Kellyn Craig Krollbeck, and we were doing a mail bag today. We were under one month from the NFL draft, so we're going to go through a bunch of questions.

People emailed in, posted on Blue Sky, because I'm not going to use the word that D.K. does for Blue Sky. Shout out to everyone's emailed us. Oh, my, why? We don't have to do that, man. It's just, you know. Yeah, we do. Okay.

We really do. All right. It's early in the morning. Thank you to D.K. and Craig for accommodating me. so I am over-energized. Craig's under-energized. D.K., just general dad nihilism. I don't know if he sleeps anymore anyway. So we're going to go through all these emails.

First, I have to start with the league meetings. All the owners have a meeting in West Palm Beach or whatever in Florida. And then the GMs and coaches go down. And the coaches take their weird little photo and the gyms do the rules and everything and all the stuff. They're talking about banning the tush push. Craig, is this the first rule change that makes you feel like an old head instead of a young head? I feel like every time there's a sport rule, I'm like, yeah, down with the olds. And this is the first one where I'm like, these freaking kids ruining the sport.

It aligns nicely with us turning 30, doesn't it? And we're like, man, these kids don't know what we used to go through. It's a good time to talk about this, too, because we're going to get into the torpedo bat later in the episode. Oh, yeah. But I think the thing that bothers me the most about this, so this is basically the Packers doing. It's all these NFC teams are jealous, like the Giants and the Cowboys are behind it. The Packers are behind it. All the teams the Eagles beat.

And I think my biggest issue with it is, like, no one has even really tried to perfect it other than the Eagles. the Bills and the Eagles are the only teams who ran it more than five times last year. So it's like maybe try it first. Don't knock it before you try it. There's like one really funny clip going around of Jordan loved trying it on the Packers. And he like fucking stumbles forward and falls.

And then they were like from that day, the Packers were like, we need to ban this. But this is incredibly soft. I think this is super lame. Are they going to start giving out participation trophies and everything? Are we going to put up banners if you sell out your stadium or something? Yeah, they're going to give an award. for non-tush-push-push first downs.

That'll be a new stat because it's soft to get a first down. I agree with Craig and I agree that I hate that teams, frankly, who didn't try to even implement it, like teams tried, but they didn't actually try on offense. You don't count as trying if you try it twice and give up. So, like, it's like they sat down to play a board game for the first time, lost, and they just wiped all the pieces off the board. Yeah.

And they're like, we're not playing Caton anymore. Dika, do you think this is soft too? Oh, yeah, I definitely do. I think it's really fun that the Eagles have this really cool competitive advantage. And again, it's like Craig said, all the other teams could try this. All the other teams are, it's legal for them to continue to try this. So go ahead and do it. I just think it is funny that, you know, like it, I just feel like it's such a successful play that.

And it's such a part of their identity that you have to keep it. I don't know. Especially because they're, you know, the Super Bowl winners and everything. It's like it feels like you're just like gutting for the team. Oh, they won. It wasn't fair. So we got to eliminate one of their biggest advantages. So can I read the official rule proposal?

This is the language. It says no offensive player may immediately at the snap push or throw his body against a teammate who was lined up directly behind the snapper and received the snap to aid him in an attempt to gain yard. So the issue is that you're getting pushed, right? It's not the QB sneak. It's pushing the QB sneaker. But what's dumb about, so it's like you can push a player, though. Like if a running back or a receiver is on the outside and gets caught up in a scrum,

the offensive lineman can get behind that guy and push them. That's fine. But you then can't push a quarterback who snaps the ball because that's unfair and Jalen Hertz is really strong. And to be clear, not to get to the nitty gritty of it, but it's weird because there was basically a rule clarification like almost 20 years ago that you can push guys. And no team has really understood the implication to that. So the Eagles called the league office about it like a few years ago and they figured all this

out that it was legal. Because honestly, I think the only team that's been the only coach I've heard actually give a real take about this was Rahim Morris at the Combine, the Atlanta Falcons head coach. Because Rahim Morris was like, you know what? You shouldn't be able to push a player. Like that's ridiculous. And I'm like, that's the only argument that

I will accept is like, you know what? The premise of it is bullshit because the player safety thing is fake. I think the player safety argument of like, oh, someone's going to get hurt. There's no data behind it. There's no players got hurt. It's all theoretical projected data. That's coming in the future. There hasn't been more

injuries because of the push. It's also, Deky, you've been covering longer than me. What do coaches say about any other conversation about player safety? They're like, it's football. People can get hurt on any play. It can hurt across the street. Then the tush push and they're like, well, we care about player safety. I'm like, no, you don't.

You're upset that it's impossible to stop. This reminds me a lot of in the early 2010s when the read option was becoming popular and coaches were like, yeah. Tomlin was famously quoted as saying, like, we look forward to eliminating it or something. It's like 10 years

later, it's still massive part of the game. It just reminds me of that where, you know, a few teams who were really good at the Redoption at the time were changing the way teams had to play defense, were changing the game of football in a lot of ways. Obviously, the Redoption wasn't new, but it was coming back in vogue. And I just remember there was all these rule changes and rule proposals around that. There was like this rule where if a player was in run posture, you could hit him. Do you remember this with the quarterbacks?

I forgot about Run posture. I don't know. It's just silly to me. Triple threat position. Yeah. Shoot pass, drive. Yeah.

I was like, but this is what football is all about. This is what coaching is all about. You adapt to the things that are happening in the league and you get better at defending them or you get better at doing them on offense and use little different, you know, wrinkles to make it more effective or try and change it. I don't know. This is like, I think this is just, it's kind of silly. My other favorite argument that they made. So the one, they use the player health, player safety. thing is an excuse. And then they said game pace, pace of play. It's boring.

That it's slowing down the game and they're basically just siding that one moment in the Washington Philly playoff game. Right. Where they kept trying to push and then Frankie Louvo kept Troy Paul Mollowing over the line to stop him. And there was like four straight palpable unfair. Palpable unfair. Pallpable unfair. It took like 90 seconds off the clock. It's probably unfair. This is palpably unfair. It's great. Did you guys see the Siriani quote? He was like, talking about this issue. He said,

if Jonathan Gannon and Shane Steichen and Kellanmore don't vote for the tush push, I'm going to be, he's basically, I'm going to be pissed. Those guys are only, he said, this is what he said.

They are in the head coach position right now because of that play. Wow. So all three, I better have those three votes right there and the Eagles vote. I know we at least have four. That's sick.

He's whipping us. I love this. He's whipped Frank Underwood over here. Did you never hear coaches talk like that either? You know what? I hate to say this. Siriani's growing on me. I like him.

Oh, 100%. That's awesome. Assyriani type is great when they're winning. There's nobody better. Dude, when they're winning, dude, oh my God. Yeah, it's the torpedo bad of football. Oh, my God. Do you buy the, it makes the play, it makes the game more boring because there's a lot

of like tush pushing inside the red zone. It is kind of boring, honestly, but that to me doesn't like move the needle enough to That's where I was going to go with this is that while I disagree with banning this play, I do think it's not that fun to watch because it is. But the problem, look, I think of every team. had mastered it, maybe it would become less fun. But it's right now, because it's pretty much just the Eagles and kind of the bills who can do it, it's still like this cool specialty thing where it's like, I don't know,

it's like Shaquille O'Neal in the early 2000s. He was kind of the only guy doing that thing. And so if there was 32 Shaquille O'Neal's, maybe it wouldn't have been as fun. But right now, it doesn't bother me. You know what else is boring? You know what else is boring to me? When they throw a pass out to the wing on a screen pass and the guy gets tackled after one yard. This is like when they ban dunking.

This is like when Kareem Abdul-Jabbar was so good, they banned dunking and then like three years later brought it back. He's just bad. They're just bad. They're just bad they're just fucking mad. Don't put it on the internet. Don't put it in the newspaper that I'm mad. I'm going to just read from... Is it going to get passed? It's 20 or not. It needs 24 out of 32 votes to get passed.

It's better not. I think it's so pathetic. That's fucking embarrassing. It's so embarrassing. You should know why. And again, we don't have to linger on this much longer. But the last thing I want to say, if it's so goddamn impossible to stop, I cannot believe how few teams have taken seriously the prospect of doing it. Not like watching some tape and trying it.

Do what the Eagles did. They brought in some Scottish rugby coach or whatever and tried it for years to perfect it because when it's done perfectly, it's really hard to stop. And I'm like, I don't know. I'm so embarrassed for everyone involved. Do you think Jalen Milro will become a more popular prospect

because they can just put him in on fourth and ones and they can just tush push with him on any team? I don't know how much he can squat. I don't know. We'll say he's got to get in the gym. Can he squat like five-undi? Yeah. Honestly,

sake won't you just do it. Yeah. Wait, other things for the owner's meetings, I'm going to just read a bunch of headlines. And if you want me to click on him, tell me. And if not, we'll get to the emails.

I like this. Titans GM, Mike Borganzi. If you have a chance to draft a franchise quarterback, you don't pass on him. Okay. Okay. Stanford hiring Frank Reich as in term head coach for 2025.

No, no. Demico, this one's funny. Domeico Ryan's denies the Texans' Offensive Line Room had become toxic. Don't put it out there that I killed that man. I feel like it probably became toxic. My shirt that said my offensive line isn't toxic is not explaining this enough to you.

Going back, do we think the Titans are bluffing a little bit? That quote seemed a little tryhard to me. It seemed a little bit too on the nose. We're really excited about a franchise quarterback. You have to take them. We're so happy with this pick and we love Cam Ward. I don't know. I think in the in the, from the angle that like everything that you hear right now is a lie and it's all smoke, Craig, like everyone agreeing that the Titans are going to take Cam Ward right now.

Like that is basically everyone, I think Adam Schaftier even said lock it in. That to me is like a little bit of a red flag where I'm like, okay, if everyone agrees on this thing. Shefty doing the work for poor guns. I think the Browns and Titans could have a deal. I don't think the Giants are involved. I think the Titans either want Carter and want to charge the Browns that swap for Ward it. And I think, put it this way, I think Cam Ward will be the first pick. I think either the Titans take it with the Browns move up one spot and take Cam Ward or the Titans.

And the Titans would take Abdul Carter. But yeah, I agree. It's weird that everyone just totally agrees. The quote just seemed a little too obvious. It's like, you know, everyone's life on Instagram is perfect. It's like, okay. Yeah. There's something up here about this post.

Titans just on their Instagram stories like, we love Cam Ward. Another great day watching Cam Ward tape. It's like, eh. You guys hear about this Cam Ward guy? Man, this guy's good. The water cooler talk. We are happy. But yeah, you're right.

Hyattitz, actually, to be clear, Schepter said he's locked in as the number one pick, not necessarily to the Titans, I think. Yeah. I think the Browns move up. And I think the Giants. You don't think the Giants are out now because of Russ and James.

I think if the, I think, I think when, to me, it's, I don't know anything. Like, all this could, you know, anything can happen. But that said, when you look at the Giants, bringing back Tommy DeVito, Russell Wilson and James Winston, three quarterbacks in like eight days, which again, they're not going to, they're not going to take a rookie quarterback and bring four of those guys in.

That's just not team studio. I don't know, maybe. And you, maybe, but like you combine that with Miles Garrett saying, the Browns told me their quarterback plan and I returned because I liked what I heard. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you combine that with Schefter saying Cammore, it'll be the first pick, but not saying the team. And I'm like, I feel like the Titans put out out there that they're enamored with Camber. award and the Browns are going to trade like look I think the biggest comp to this is probably

seven years ago forget the name but it's Mitchell Trubisky in that 2017 NFL draft where the nineers had the second pick and the Bears had the third pick and the and the Niners basically extorted the Bears for like a third rounder to move up and they were never going to take Trubisky and so the Bears paid a third rounder I think it's going to be like that the Browns are probably offering a somewhat high pick relatively to move up the one spot and the Giants are like you want us to beat that no way and I think that's kind of where it's at. So I think the Giants decided to just do Russell Wilson and James and the Browns are going to do something.

Or they won't. I don't know. But then it's like, who's the Titans taking? And maybe the Titans want Rogers, maybe the Titans get Kirk cousins. I don't really know. So we'll see. With that said,

anything else on that? Do you have any thoughts on that? Because that's actually my question is who's the Titans quarterback if the Titans trade down to do? Yeah. Will Levis, maybe, I guess. Kirk? Yeah.

I would be, that actually would be the most surprising outcome of all the possible outcomes that the Titans just go with Will Levis and no real competition for him. That would be shocking. That seems unlikely to me based on the last two years of Will Levis. I'm reading what Schaefter said in this segment, and he mentioned even the Saints could come up and take it. It's like the idea of the Saints trading up to what number one is now one of my favorite things.

That would be incredible. Also, those picks in the future, oh my God. All right, let's get to some emails. And I think this is a good one to start with. And again, thank you to everyone emails, like ring your fancy football at e-gmail. This email is from Gideon. Good. Good.

Gid. Dian. Who are the... What'd you call? Gideon. Gideon. Gideon. Dian.

Gideon Sanders. It's like in Australia. Good day on? Okay. Who are the better on your life prospects in this draft? Ooh. I don't believe in this because even the, even the generational, even the generational can't miss prospects, it's like 50%. It does feel like if you include health, it's like 250.

Wait, D.K. Who were the can't miss? miss prospects? Who were the bet your life prospects like in each of the last two years for you? I don't know. Was Caleb Williams counted in that? I feel like he was generational. I don't know if he was Can't miss. There's a clear distinction there. He was much worse than everyone expected, I would say. Bejohn was up there. It feels like he's definitely going to hit. Does Jamar Chase can't miss? Yes. Jamar Chase. Although, Chase. People did talk themselves into Chase not being as good as he was because he didn't play

that year, like the final year or whatever. What about like Joe Alt? Was Joe Alt? Can't miss? Okay. He was not Can't Miss. I think Quentin Nelson. Marvin Harrison?

Quentin Nelson? Why, Marvin Harrison? It's like I remember last year. So like Marvin Harrison, Caleb Williams last year, too, I felt like we're both sort of the quote unquote generational players. And that didn't go great year one. I still believe in both of them. But if we were basing like this bet your life on it thing on year one, I would be very nervous about that. I don't think there are.

any bet your life guys in this draft. And here's why. The bet your life guy to me is Travis Hunter. But Travis Hunter's not a give-it-to-me solely because it's complicated. Like if Travis Hunter really wants to play receiver and cornerback, and they're like, yeah, his team is like, yeah, we'll like let you do that, but they don't really believe it. Like I could see that going wrong where he's upset or someone like the development.

Like it's just complicated, right? Like, it's just a complicated thing to make that work. I wouldn't bet my life that he could definitely be the first person to do this thing that hasn't been done it 100 years. And you take Travis Hunter out of it. I mean, I know Abdul Carter has a I learned to

I read too much of Drew Rosenhaus explaining Abdul Carter's foot to me in February You're giving me too much information here. I know way too much about the stress reaction to Abdul Carter's foot

to put my life on the line. So I don't think there is anyone, D.K. You know, so I mean, the other person I would throw out I had Abdul Carter written down just because

he's my number one player in this draft. I think when you watch him, I'm like, the floor is just so high with this guy because he's so explosive, so flexible, so bendy.

I just feel like there's going to be a role for him in the NFL. The other guy I wrote down as Ash and Gentie, but I mean, you remember Trent Richardson? Like, I don't think Gentie is going to turn out like Richardson. But man, the Browns traded up for Richardson at like number two or something like that. It's like he felt like a no miss or a can't miss prospect. And he just couldn't, he just had no vision.

He couldn't see where he's running. I don't think a can't miss prospect can be in the Mountain West. I mean, and there you go. I think that's fair. As, as conferences as that is to say, I think that's accurate. Look, I went to a school. in the mountain west, you know? I think that's accurate.

There are no, there are no, can't miss. So I'm just going to go down my big board. And also, Camus prospect, I mean, potential means you ain't done shit yet. Like the whole point is that they all miss. Even Andrew Luck, would you count Andrew Luck as a hit? Because it's like, obviously he was good enough. That dude played five seasons, basically. And then he retired.

And I'm like, I know that's like there were injuries, but that's kind of the point. Even the guys who hit the, who hit the ceiling. I think let's take the potential for injuries out of this. Even just looking at my big board, Abdul Carter, I think is my, who I would bet the most on. And even he's not a sure thing. Travis Hunter, like everything you said, Ashton Jenty, Ted McMillan,

who people are all over the board on him. Will Campbell. Is he a guard? Is he a tackle? Is he even the top tackle in this class? Mason Graham, another T-Rex guy. A white interior defensive lineman,

which was last time one of those, like turned out to be a superstar based on where he was picked. Cam Ward, Jalen Walker, Twainer. Armand Membu. Same deal, like not as long as a normal tackle. Will Johnson coming off injuries

hasn't tested or anything in this process there's just like huge question marks with all these guys. So with that said, a related email. So none. I refuse. I refuse to answer this question. So this one's from Ben.

Ben, Benny. In a draft class like this where there's a few blue chip talents and the talent between like Pick 10 and Pick 40 are more similar. Are the guys outside of the consensus top two talents? Like Cam Ward, like, well, I don't know, he's included Cam Ward,

but Abdul Carter, Travis Hunter, Will Camel, Mason, Graham, Ash and Gentie. Are you more willing to trade up for those top-tier talents in this year's class than in other years because of the flattening from like 10 to 40? No. I think. All right, cool. All right. You know what? Don't question, Ben.

I don't think I don't think. No, no, no. That's not a dumb question. I just don't think, based on everything we just said, you want to trade up for these guys. I'm kind of of the opinion and I've held this for a while. I don't know if I necessarily, I think I'm starting to soften on it a little bit, but like, don't trade a future first rounder for anything but a quarterback is kind of my philosophy in the draft. Just because those guys, it's so hard to live up to that and be that type of big impact player that were you trading a future first,

which could end up being the first overall pick, right, if it all goes wrong. But I will say, I think I heard, I can't remember who I heard say this. Maybe it's Daniel Jeremiah that he thinks there's going to be a discount on trading up this year based on just the fact that there are not as many blue chip players in this draft. Like, teams are just not going to be willing to shell out as much. You'd expect to trade into the first round. Like, you get an extra 25, 30% on top of it based on that pick. In terms of, like, what we're looking at the JJ, the Jimmy Johnson trade chart,

there's like, this is something that teams have used pretty closely over the years. There's a couple other trade charts. It's not that different than like a fantasy football trade calculator. Totally. You type in the pick and the pick. And they're like, I don't want to look stupid. It's like, 3,400 points. and like, you owe us this now.

That should have the bane of my existence. Anytime you submit a trade request, if they see that their team is in the red and not the green on Yahoo, you're screwed. Dude, literally. Teams and people just don't want to be viewed as getting, you know, whatever, like getting worked in a trade. And so I think, but this year in particular,

just because of the lack of true blue chip talent at the top, that, you know, that tax or whatever in the top three picks or whatever it is, is not going to be quite as much. So that being said, like, if you really feel great about, you know, Travis Hunter or whatever, you want to come up to three or four and get him if he's still there. I totally get that. And I don't think it's like a bad move necessarily. But I think because of all the question marks around all these guys, I probably would not be trading up unless it was like really discounted.

I think overall I agree like you want more picks. Like more picks are good. I mean, that's just kind of how I've always looked at it is. More bites at the apple. Exactly. More darts to throw out the dartboard. No one knows anything. And, you know, unless it's a truly can't miss guy, which, again, like we just said, there aren't really none of those in this class.

All right. This next email is from mediocre Josh. Joshy. Some blue sky. Shut up. Follow some blue sky. You're not mediocre. Thanks for the skeet, Josh.

Josh says, I don't have a question, but please read the lyrics to Fox Trot Uniform by Charlie Kilo the Bloodhound on air. Fox Trot Uniform Charlie Kilo. What do any of those words mean? Spelling fuck. He's spelling fuck in the Oh, he is. Fox shot. Oh, and in the like, whatever. What is it called the code for what, like it's what, how pilots and stuff.

Military. Unicate military. So you don't fuck up the letters. Right. Vulcanize the whoopee stick in the ham wallet. Cattle prod the oyster ditch with the lap rocket. Batter dip the cranny axe in the gut locker. Retrofit the pudding hatch. Ulala with the blank swatter.

Some of these all sex euphemisms? Yeah. Oh, yeah, I think they are. Yeah. If it's just fair. Yeah. Well, that's been pretty wordy. That makes sense.

Well, I was like, oyster ditch. Should I keep going or am I trapped now? Say them again. Now that I know I want to hear him again. Vulcanized, this is the beginning of the song. Vulcanize the whoopee stick in the ham wallet. Cattle prod the oyster ditch with the lap rock. Oh, I see.

The oyster ditch. Jesus. Batter dip the cranny axe in the gut locker, retrofit the pudding hatch, uh-la-la-la with the point swatter. I got to say batter dip is very, I don't like that one book. If I get you in the loop. I like gut locker.

I've got a lot of I've heard that would be full. God, damn. Why is this the third question we're reading today? What's happening? How did this sneak its way in here? Oh, my God. I don't know. When I make a point to be...

What is this apropos of? What is this referencing? Like, why is this about... Because we were talking about this band the other day. Oh, the Bloodhound? Yeah. And also because we read the lyrics to the My Dick guy. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, that was a while ago. Fresher washed the quiver bone. Mickey Avalon would be proud of the Bloodhound gang. He's got the words pork steeple in here, and I think that's going to be where I ended. All right, well, we did it. Okay. That guy is.

Lost my nerve. All right, back to the draft. Well, that was great. Calvin. Cal. What do you call Calvin? You call him Cal? I call him Calvin.

Okay. We thought when we named him, we're like, yeah, he has, he has all these different options. Cal, Vinny, Vin, all these other things. You know, when you're... Is that where Vin comes from? No, no, no, no, I'm just saying, but Cal Vin. He could be, like, we just wanted to give him options if he wanted to change his name. Right.

Vinny Kelly. Yeah, Vinny. Are you, is he at an age now where for Halloween, he could be Cal Notton Jr. And you could be Ricky Bobby. Yeah. He'd be pretty sweet. No, he's the baby Jesus. Oh, he's a baby Jesus.

Sweet. He's too old for that now. Six pound, eight ounce baby Jesus. How did you not do that in the first year he was born? Damn. Wait, I was a man. He had a beard. I actually went to a dress-up party this weekend, Craig, and there was two guys dressed up as Caldott and then Vicki Bobby.

It's pretty good. What dress-up weekend in March are you going to? It was just someone's birthday party. Oh. It was the theme was Spice Girls. And so everyone, like I'd say like 70. percent of people there just dressed up in like athletic gear, leisure, you know? Yeah.

I was just wearing like Skippy and I both just wore Adidas track suits. So everybody went as sporty spots. And bucket hats. Yeah, pretty much. Sporty spice. There was a few people that went as like baby spice. I think that was bait. Was that one of them?

Baby spice, sporty spice, posh spice. Baby spice had like the big ass boots and like the pig tails and everything. My God, that was such a weird era of the world. to have grown up in. I didn't know there was a baby spice. Yeah, the big, like, platform shoes. Anyway, it was fun. All right.

Well, sporty, sporty, baby, posh, ginger, and scary. Oh, ginger. How did we forget, ginger spice? Who was scary spice? Scary spice was Mel B. Oh, yeah, okay. Well, actually, that actually, that was Calvin's question. Which one was sporty was scary spice?

That was his question. Do you think they ever approached the spice girls for a snow white remake? So the Snowway remake bombed They're blaming it on the actress Even though who wants to go see You know what, whatever I'll read Calvin's question Cal

They are blaming it on the actress Yeah, you're right How do you weigh drafting for need Versus taking the best player available Which I like this question Because we Oh, and I do I'm so guilty of this too

Everyone does this but I'm guilty of it Where I'm like, you know You gotta just take the best player available Don't worry about like what you need in your team And then we're like Well I think they're gonna take alignment Because they need one So like

What actually was the way team should be thinking about like need versus where does team need factor into taking players? I mean, it depends. That's the hard part to answer this question. This is like the age old question when it comes to the draft. If you're just going to take the best player available, where does Aston Gentie fit in? You know what I mean? Like is he going to be the third pick in the draft because he's the third best player? I think most teams to say no because of the surplus value that you get from a player on a

rookie contract relative to the guys being paid big money at those positions. So like for instance, Ashton Genty, if he's taken in the, you know, the top five or whatever, he's probably going to be making top 10 money at the running back position. And that's not a great, that doesn't provide you a ton of value relative to the other positions. You know what I mean? So like if you're like, if you take a receiver, you get a ton of value for the first four or five years of that player's career relative to what the other receivers in the NFL are making. That allows you to build a better roster around you.

So that's like, in theory, why you have to take, and this is not even necessarily need. It's just value of certain players. So I should pull these numbers because I think that we always say, oh, the value. And I'm like, you don't explain it well enough. Or this I feel like I don't. There's team need. There's best player available, but there's most valuable player available. And I think that's the thing that's important, remember is the game within the game is what's the, how can you, basically, if the salary cap's $280 million, how you need, we want to build a $500 million team.

Like that's the point. Right. Jalen Carter is worth like 10 times more than he's making it. The Eagles have a $500 million roster and you, that's the, that's the goal. Right. They're paying him $250. So an example, Justin Herbert's first contract over the four or five years or the four-year deal was $26 million total. Justin Herbert's second contract was $260 million.

Literally went from $26 million to $2.60 million. It was 10x. he was playing just as well on the first as he was on the second. And like all these are like the CD Lam's first contract was 14 million. His CD Lam's second contract was 140 million. Like Miles Garrett's first contract was 30 million. His next one was 130 million. And so that's over there.

Hold that in your head. Sequin Barclay's first contract was for $31 million. Sequin Barclay's second contract was for $37 million. So all that's to say, that's the real. reason, and I don't think we put it in those terms enough, but that's what we're talking about, is the value the Cowboys just got was they were getting Citi Lamb at a $140 million level of play, and they were getting the $140 for $14 million for Dallas. Justin Herbert was a $260 million player playing for 26, and if you take Ashton Genti, this is why I don't

think a team should take Ashton Genti, is that you can take Ashton Genti, and he's not actually, if he hits his ceiling, he's not actually delivering you surplice. plus value. So just take one in the third round who might be 80% as good because the defensive lineman you get in the top 10 is like going to be playing for you a 10th of the price of what they're worth if they hit. It's a, it's the force multiplier theory or whatever. You know what I mean? Like having a guy on having a Jamar Chase on a rookie contract is a force multiplier for the rest of your team. Having a Russell Wilson on a rookie contract, force multiplier for the rest of your team. It means you can spend so much more money on other players that are really important.

And like you said, Haif, it's like, if you draft Gentie, he hits his ceiling, that's great because you have a good player. But and everything else being equal, you know, like you want good players. But you have to be thinking where like how much extra surplus value am I going to be getting from this player if he hits? You know what I mean? Yeah, not all needs are created equally, I would say. It's like if you need a quarterback wide receiver tackle or edge rusher, you should probably address those. But if you need a safety or a linebacker or something or a running back, you could. probably still take the best player available

over those positions because like Hyfit said, the value of those positions is much lower financially in terms of where the upside is. Also, to address this question if we're not really answering the correct question here, like drafting for need versus best player available, I guess that would assume, like, you don't

really need a left tackle, so you take something else, even though you have the left tackled graded highest on your board. I personally believe you cannot have too many defensive linemen or offensive linemen. Like, take those guys and figure out the best five or the best four, whatever have you on whatever side of the ball. It does, like, there's no such thing as too much like redundancy on an offensive line or a

defense line to me personally. I think you could probably say the same of, you know, maybe a receiver. Like the more good receivers you have on team, that's almost always going to be a good thing. The guys who signed the biggest contracts in their second deal, those are probably the guys you should try to target because they're the most affordable for the first. Don't pass them because you've already got a guy at some position. You know what I mean? And the flip side also, this is why you also want to be able to look ahead and see things coming. So, for example, a really annoying thing the Eagles did really well was when they lost that previous Super Bowl two years ago to the Chiefs. They needed two things.

They needed edge rushers and they needed secondary. And what really annoying thing they did well was they attacked defense in the draft that had a ton of defensive linemen. They got Jalen Carter and Nolan Smith. And they didn't really address the secondary. the next year was had a ton of cornerbacks and they went and got Cooper DeGine and Quinnian Mitchell who again in a free market probably

at this point north of 20 million a year Quinnian Mitchell might be worth 30 million a year if he keeps playing as well as he is and like those guys are probably getting combined 10 or whatever so you want your overall strategy to align with is this a class that's deep for this so this year is the defensive line class it's a good year to get defensive linemen

so last year it wasn't a good running back class in the draft so Sequin and Derek Henry and all Aaron Jones Joe Mix and all these guys did get contracts because it was a foul year at running back. This year at running back, there's so many in the draft. And so what they do is teams use free agency to balance out the needs so they feel confident

they can get something in the draft. So good teams are using free agency to make sure they're not super desperate to get something in the draft. That's why the Falcons drove me so crazy by signing Kirk Cousins because they should have known they could get Michael Pennix in a draft where you had the eighth pick and there was six quarterbacks in their top 12.

Why are you signing Kirk Cucs? cousins the odds you get a quarterback are so fucking high anyway that's not the point well they fell in love with him later i think is the answer which is just like know what you're whatever did you i heard this sean peyton was talking about this he they didn't know that bo necks was going to be their guy until like a couple weeks before the draft even at the combine they're like he didn't even have that good of a combine we just fell in love with him later which i think they do the visits they do the private but uh it is kind of what happens i think that's the thing with the borgonzi and the titans and taking camp ward i'm like i think teams are teams figure this stuff out in march enough

February. So it's because then you get all these coaches involved. Coaches aren't involved in the draft stuff for most of the year. And then late in the process, they get involved. They have their agendas. They think, you know, this is a guy we can really coach up. This is a guy fits perfect in our system or whatever. And I think grades change, opinions change and decisions change.

Yeah. The short answer is need is a tiebreaker and value is more than a tiebreaker. Right. I guess the best way. So this question was specifically about the Patriots. And is Hunter and Carter, too good to pass up for a team that needs an offensive line. And I would say, yes.

They are too good to pass up. Don't pass them up. Also, those are two other premium positions that we just talked about. That's an edge rusher and a crazy, never seen before, receiver quarterback. Yeah. So I think in this particular question, I would absolutely take Hunter and Carter over Will Johnson or whoever you have as your time. You know what I was?

Sorry, yeah, yeah, yeah. Ben also emailed then, like, what is the team or player in the draft? Like, the fit you're most intrigued by? And I'm actually kind of intrigued if you're, you're the Patriots at four and you kind of want Will Campbell. And you do want an offensive line, which would make sense because they like have Morgan Moses right tackle. But they kind of need offensive linemen.

We got a lot of defense alignment. If you don't want Travis Hunter, you could trade down. I'm like, who's going to trade up? I would kind of love to see the Raiders move up from six to four. If the Raiders took Travis Hunter and put him with Pete Carroll as a cornerback, he could learn for Pete Carroll as a cornerback. And then Travis Hunter was the number one receiver in,

And for the Raiders, I would kind of love that. And that's the fit I'm kind of, that would be a cool fit to me. I don't know if you guys. I would love that. So that's another thing. I think I personally think Hunter would be an awesome fit in New England because they need more receiving help. And they would probably play him on offense. Like, I think the thing that most, one of the more interesting talking points in this draft right now is where Travis Hunter ends up landing.

Because if he lands with the Browns, for instance, I think people think more likely he's going to play on defense. If he lands with the Patriots, more likely he plays on offense. They already have Christian Gonzalez a shutdown corner. I think they really need a receiver. They've just struck out on every receiver they've ever taken the Patriots. Like going back, for whatever reason, the Patriots has just been at at evaluating receiver talent. But that would give them a quote unquote number one,

a potential to be a number one guy in the future. Definitely add depth their thing to the receiver core. They would also probably sprinkle him in on defense in certain sets, certain situations, third downs, you know, things like that, red zone. I started out this draft season thinking he's a corner who will moonlight at receiver. And I'm like flipping it now, I think. I'm like, I want him to play receiver and moonlight at corner, however that works. And if you look at like what receivers are making, it's like it makes sense for him to want to be receiver.

So I like Hunter to the Raiders. You like Hunter of the Patriots. Craig, is there a fit? It doesn't have to be Travis Hunter, but is there a fit with a player that you kind of like, you kind of want it to happen. There's a couple of receiver fits I want to see. Like I think the Panthers taking Tet McMillan would be really cool. I think that's kind of exactly what Bryce Young needs.

It's like a big body that he can trust over the middle of the field and complete passes to. Year two with Dave Canales, it's like Tet McMillan is kind of getting those Mike Evans, T. Higgins comps. Canales was just with Mike Williams and Tampa. The Panthers, I mean, the Panthers wide receiver situation right now is they have Xavier Leggett going into a second year. they have Adam Thielen, who's 47 years old. They have Jalen Koker, who kind of popped as a rookie last year. And that's it.

I mean, there is not a lot of like size or anything like that on the outside. So I think Tet for the Panthers would be awesome, even though they need a million things. And then the other guy I was kind of thinking about was for Baltimore. Ameca and Buka, the wide receiver out of Ohio State. I don't know. The two things, reading DK's draft guide, which everybody should check out. NFLDraft.com. Thank you.

NFLJraft. at the ringer.com. He pointed out that Emeka does two things really well. He's got great hands and he can block. And thinking about what the Ravens need is people who can catch the ball because they have Mark Andrews and Safe Flores. Two people who, you know, historically have had a little trouble holding on to the football. And the Ravens are a team who like to run the ball.

So getting a wide receiver who can block and who has sure hands seems important to me. And outside of Save Flowers, they haven't really had a second guy ever in the Lamar Jackson era. So I would really like to see that. I think that makes a lot of sense. He's good after the catch, too. He's just a really solid receiver all around. A couple of team fits that I think make a lot of sense and would, I think, be cool. A lot of people are giving Ash and Genty to the Raiders in terms of mock drafts and everything.

But if they wait and take another position there in the second round, Quintan Judkins from Ohio State, who was with Chip Kelly last year. I think Chip Kelly's going to want to run a really run heavy offense with the Raiders this year. like I think that's why Pete Carroll brought him in. It's like philosophically they align in terms of like, let's be balanced, let's run the ball. Let's have a ton of different run styles that we can do. And so, you know, and then obviously Will Howard might maybe like a later round,

like third or fourth round or whatever for the quarterback out of Ohio State. Right. For the Buckeyes. I think he would make a lot of sense to reunite with Chip Kelly. They could develop him that way. We met Will Howard in Indianapolis on the street. It's like somebody how easily convinced I. am of a player. I met him and he was very nice for like

eight seconds. And I'm like, Will Howard. He was really nice. Look just for the eyes, handshake. You know, he has a lot going on. He gave us the time of day. And we were like, wow, well, nice to meet you. And we're like, you know, he's going to make it. He's like, hey care, guys, great to meet you. And I'm like, you're a first rounder now. Sold. Yeah. Damn it. I'm in.

You son of a bitch. I'm in. It doesn't take much. The other thing I think that is fun. And, you know, this kind of goes against everything we were just talking about in terms of value and everything. But man, if the bears do take Ashton Genty, I feel like that's a really fun pairing and a potentially good pairing. Because I just trust Ben Johnson to get the most out of him,

both as a runner and in the passing game. You know, Gentie, I think, is underrated as a past catcher. Like, he didn't do a ton of it this last year because they were just running the rock so much. But he's a good past catcher. I think he's the type of guy. Ben Johnson is the type of guy who could get him involved in the screen game. Just be a valuable chip for them.

Obviously, you know, what we saw last year with Montgomery and Gibbs. Obviously, they had a much better offensive line. I think the Bears are looking to build their offensive line, and hopefully they do get that together. But I don't know, that just seems like a really fun pairing. Well,

you're also dancing around it. Bears fans would freak out. I mean, that would be Walter Payton 2.0. No, I'm not being hyperbolic. I mean, obviously, I don't know Ashton Chipties can be Walter Payton. But if you're a Bears fan,

and you have Ashton Genty and Caleb Williams, I mean, I mean, that, That's like, I mean, I mean, look, should you take a running back in the first round, everything we just talked about? I don't know. But if you're a Bears fan, holy shit, you get Ashton Gentie in a redone, in a redone offensive line. Like, Bears fans are going to freak out. And then we can say again for year two of Caleb Williams, hey, no second year your quarterback has ever had this good of a supporting cast.

Yeah, we kind of can't fail. But for real this time, we actually meet it now. We were idiots last year. Yeah, we didn't know what we were doing last year. We got kind of too distracted by the wide receivers, didn't really focus on the offensive line. this year though. Joe Tuny and Jonah Jackson who was on play for last year

but now he's in Chicago so it's fixed. It's gonna be fine. Anyway. Yeah. I just think that would be a lot of fun. My only other fit I like on the running back thing is Trevian Henderson to the Chiefs. I know our bit is that like

just given running backs to the Chiefs, but I think that's over now because the Chiefs kind of ick. In my experience, Chiefs fans were not happy with the idea of taking a running back in the first round in one of the deepest running back classes in recent history.

But I do love that fit a lot because he's so good in the passing game. He could come in right away, be trusted as a pass protector, be really explosive in the offense, really explosive in the screen game. Yeah, it just makes a lot of sense. Okay.

All right. Moving on here. They need to relax. It's the 30th pick of the first round. Yeah, everyone calmed down. Dude, just take a good player. Yeah. You want an interior of defensive line

that you never heard of? This one's from Nicholas. Nikki. If you guys could go to any of the games internationally, where would you go? The game, there's London,

Brazil, Berlin, Madrid, and Dublin. I would want to split the G with my pals in Dublin, baby. Also, they haven't announced yet, but I think that game is going to be Steelers Packers, which if Aaron Rogers goes to the Steelers, that would be incredible. Oh, my God. Yeah, we got to go to that. Would they let him in?

To Ireland? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know either. D.K., you're Irish, right? We can get in touch with your heritage. You can take us around. Sure. Should we do the It's Always Sunny episode where Charlie Kelly tries to find his dad?

I've heard Irish people love when you tell them that you're Irish, an American person. They love that. Yeah, they're the coolest. They just want to hear all about your history and everything. That's usually what they say. I was recently in a bar in Boston and we ordered Guinness and the waitress was from

Ireland and we were asking her, you know, is the difference, is the quality of Guinness really that different from Ireland to anywhere in America? And she said, yes, completely. They are different drinks. And I was like, okay, I got to go to Dublin then. All right. Well, it's to figure it out. I would do Brazil.

My brother had an opportunity to go to Brazil last year because his wife at work. And then he was like not going to go. And then he turned on an episode of Anthony Bourdain. Oh, yeah. And the episode literally starts. Like literally the opening narration is Anthony Bordane being like, imagine having the chance to go to Brazil and not how stupid you would feel. And my brother's like, all right, I'll come to Brazil with you. And he was like he had the best time.

And I'm like, so I think I would do the Brazil game. I don't know. This is tough. I think I've been to London a couple times, so maybe that wouldn't be the top of my list. I have been to Dublin, but I love Dublin and I love Ireland. So I definitely want to go to that. You haven't been to Dublin, but you love Dublin? No, I have been to Dublin. Okay. I mean, I don't go to Madrid. I've never been to Madrid because I, and I think that would be really interesting. And I've heard the, you know, like the food there is insane and good. Berlin, though, I think I might choose here. I would go Brazil. I was only in Berlin for one day. And I honestly like, I don't know. I don't say like, like, I. it would just be cool to... Well, that's not great planning from this show. If it's just Hyphids in Brazil, I'm in Dublin. Yeah, we probably should figure that out. I'm probably choosing Dublin here.

Yeah. Just because I want to tell the Irish people how I have Irish heritage and, you know, just regale them with stories of my history. Yeah. I'm going to... This Guinness tastes the same as the one I had in Los Angeles. Just, just, they just beat you up. I heard it's all about the poor. Do they split the G in Ireland?

If we have any Irish listeners, it... Tell us if you know what that is. What are the G is relatively new, at least in terms of like being an internet sensation. It's probably a dumb American thing. I watched someone email like my great-grandfather. Split the G. My father before him and they were to freak out what Kurt just said. All right.

This one's from Steve. Steve. If you're the Steelers general manager, how much would you be willing to offer San Francisco for Brock Bertie? If you're the 49ers, what would it take for you to admit that you're rebuilding and trade him? So I was looking at kind of other. comparable trade packages for quarterbacks in the last like three, four years. Russell Wilson went for two first, two seconds and a fifth. Jeez.

I would give up three firsts right now for Brock Bernie. Would you really? Yeah. But you have to pay him $250 million a year. Yeah. Yeah, I don't care. I would give up three firsts. I would not.

I would give them $50 million a year. 55 million. Well, maybe hopefully. I would hesitate at two firsts. Maybe it's $43 million a year. You would? Here's my thinking. One, the Steelers are the most competent,

competent team in the league and that they're always 500, no matter how good or bad their roster is. So it's like these first round picks when you get Brock Purdy are like going to be in the early 20s. To me, not a big deal. You're not giving up top five, top 10 picks. And you're getting a guy who I believe is competent and a floor razor to the point where like, we are now good for four to five years, which I haven't felt since like 2015 for the Steelers. So I would 100% give up three first round picks in the 20s for Brock Bernie. I would. Okay. supposed to what? We're going to take Jackson Dart 21.

We're going to have Aaron Rogers for a year. What the fucker? What else are we going to do? If those are your only choices, I guess, sure. I would not do that. Hell yeah. I would not endorse three firsts for Brock Purdy. I said I'd give up 10 first for Mahomes. I got flack and now I'm getting three first for Purdy.

I mean, yeah, like I say, I don't know if I would give up two first for Perry. I think that you could easily I would give up two first for Brockford. Could the not just get a first? Yeah. The Saints have the ninth pick. Yeah, they could give them. the ninth pick for Well, nine's too high.

Wouldn't you give up 22, pick 22, two years in a row for Brock Purdy? I would easily. Yeah. I would give up the 21st pick this year for Brock Purdy. Sure. Oh, I would do it twice over, three times over.

We're underestimated how nice it is to have a quarterback. Yeah. I don't know if it's more insulted right now. I would do the same for Dak Prescott too. I would trade two first for Dak Prescott right now. Someone else, yes, wait, let me find that. I think that's fine. How is that fine?

And Dak Prescott's like six years older, injury riddle. Procordy's like young and good. Shane says as a Cowboys fan, I'm more hopeless than I've ever been with the hiring of Brant Schaimer. Schottenheimer declared I'm taking a gap here from the team, but I'm still wondering the same question I asked you guys last year during the TickBurge. Why shouldn't the Cowboys just trade Dak Prescott get whatever draft capital they can from him? I mean, the real answer to that's because they have to sell tickets.

And if you trade Dak, you can't convince people to put butts in seats and watch the games. And Jerry Jones is not in the business of like starting over. No, it's not a start. an over guy. But one season, I'd rather have tacked than Purdy. I mean, I feel pretty confident about that. I think I'm, I guess I'm higher on Purdy than you guys. I think Purdy's really good. And I know the whole Shanahan thing is maybe like once he's separated from Shanahan, he'll turn back into a seventh run pick. But I think, I mean, I don't know, maybe the last year is clouding our judgment too much. Purdy was like, there were moments there where we were like, this guy is

a top five, top seven quarterback in the league. I'm saying right now that the Browns, We're the first team to trade three first for a quarterback in 55 years. And that was the Sean Watson trade. And that was bad when we thought Watson was going to be. Whatever. Two first and in a second, two first and two thirds. I would get a big old package up for Brock Purdy. The Steelers have done an insane thing. And they're at the point where you need Aaron Rogers,

which is a crazy place to put yourself. Three years from now when the Steelers have had one year of Aaron Rogers, that goes terribly. And then, but we won eight, seven, eight games. And then once again, we have the 23rd. pick and then we take whatever fourth quarterback off the board in 2026 and then we have him for two years and he sucks and then it's 2028 and tj wats off the team and we're completely rebuilding would i then look back and go man i i wish i spent a bunch of money and gave up a lot for brock purdy because

maybe we could have gone 12 and 5 and been a two seed i think in 2028 i will feel that way so i might as well get ahead of it now. I will say, I think this game is always so funny because when you say two firsts, you're like, no. And then you go back and look at any teams firsts. Steelers had a stretch of, okay, Troy Fautonu, Roger Jones. Then you had Kenny Pickett, Naji Harris,

Chase Claypool. Yeah. Then you say the names and you're kind of like, Roger Jones. It's like... Chase Claypool was a first? He was the 32nd pick. Yeah. So I'm counting it. But he was... I don't know. Because the Dolphins... I'm just like, I think three years from now, whatever three picks we take in the first round,

I will look back and be like, I wish I had Brock Bertie. I think Craig's right about that in that you shouldn't do it, but you would look back and be like, yeah, I kind of wish we had. Would I give up the last three first round picks we had for a good quarterback right now immediately? Yeah.

So this is assuming that those are bad players. Well, if those picks are even higher. If those picks are bad players, I would trade three of them for Brock Pretty, of course. What is the hit rate? What is the hit rate of first round picks past 20? So the real answer to this, It's always 50-50.

It's 50. The judgment is, and teams carry themselves, do you pick up the fifth-year option in the first-run contract? Which just remind people, all these draft picks get four-year deals. It's uniform. It's in the collective bargaining agreement. First-run picks, the team gets to add a fifth-year option for a preset amount of money. That's pretty decent chunk of change.

Half of them get picked up. And I would say two-thirds of the guys, if everyone was healthy, might get picked up. If you include injuries, there's about 16 guys that get, sometimes it's 13. Like sometimes it's like less than half the guys. The team even wants the fifth year of the guy. So it is low. Even first round picks five years later, it's like usually like 14 dudes end up doing it.

So to Craig's point, yeah, you never know. Maybe I'm a little bit overzealous and desperate here, but. Maybe. I'm telling you. The real NFL draft show where the draft is stupid.

Don't even worry about the picks. I just like, I mean, yes, if it was three bad players, I would also trade three bad players. Picks are useless. Well,

so the odds are it's going to be one. and a half good players, right? If it's 50-50 and three first rounds, you're going to get one and a half good players. Would you give up one and a half good players for Brock Purdy? I would. All right. Sure. Yeah. Honestly, fuck it. Whatever. I get it. Life has no meaning. Eat our best. Here's the thing. You're wrong in the sense of like a logical approach to it. But having watched the Giants take like Cadarius Tony and Deonti Banks and you look at these people and you're like, you might get cut if you were in a first round pick. I get. I get. what he's saying.

You're trading like, roster building. I mean like roster building theory or whatever, it's an atrocious trade. If you're trading three first round picks plus giving them $250 million.

That's atrocious. That's like you're going to set your team back a decade. Let me win the super bowl. But also, it just might work. We've got an email from Glebes. Glebes. I don't want to send a whole email over,

but my favorite kitchen gadget is my cherry pitter. How's that work? What's a cherry? How do you pit it? You have a cherry. Is this another bloodhound gang thing? Oh, it's like a garlic press. She's a cherry.

Is that like, that's an all-time sexual innuendo you just made. Oh, wow. A cherry pitter? Was that the point or no? Yes. Okay. Oh, wait, did this guy get me? It was just sitting right there.

Did I get got? Oh, this is cool. No, there's a cherry pitter. This is cool looking at it. It's just basically like, it's almost like a garlic smasher, but it's like a thin rod that goes through the cherry. So what happens to the cherry? It just has like a huge hole in the middle of it.

So you guys didn't jump at thin rod that goes through the cherry. Thank God. If you think about it, everything is sexual, Craig. That is true. If you really try. A thin rod that pierces the pit of the cherry. This is cool, though. I get this.

It sucks eating a cherry with a pit. Yeah. You know? It sucks. I'm not a big cherry guy. I like dates a lot. and, you know, you work the way around the date. Dates are good.

I like dates now. So I know I'm old. Dates are very good for you. That's good to know. This is old people talk about dates. Old people talk about various fruits they like. This is like, things that happen when you get old. You talk about dates.

You start talking about real estate, like, but by a square foot. You know what I mean? Like, just things happen. You start going to venues and looking around and being like, it must have cost a lot. Yeah. Yeah. I just had a whole Twitter back in front.

about bananas the other day. I mean, what? I'm old now, yeah. Someone, someone agree with your take that bananas are the best fuel? Yeah,

the Titans beat reporter Easton Freeze was tweeting about how much of a secret superpower bananas are because they're the perfect food. They're like already pre-packaged. They taste good. You know,

they're really good for you, all this great stuff. And I was like, yeah, but have you ever had two bananas? You can fucking conquer the world after two bananas. And then there was like me

and seven people going back and forth about how great bananas are. as a source of energy. That sounds like a really positive interaction on the internet. Yeah, it was. I'm bringing Twitter back. Maybe Twitter isn't a tonic

after all. No, no, no, fuck that. Go to Bluske. What's the most fun trade fantasy-wise you can realistically see happening during the draft

before the, during the draft? To which I kind of thought George Pickens to the Raiders. Like I still, there was like Omar Khan, the GM of the Steelers was asked like, oh, well,

D.K. Metcalfeckins. And he was like, well, you need multiple receivers. We like George. we like Calvin Austin. We like Roman Wilson. And I'm like, yeah,

I don't think George Pickens is on this football team in 2026. And so maybe they keep Pickens this year, but I also think Pickens could totally get traded. And Pickens just feels like a raider. He is built to be a raider. Perfect Raider. Perfect Raider.

I saw him. Shouts out Bill Barnow, I was reading his latest mock. And he thought about a, Brandon Ayyuk and the 11th pick to New England for 104, a little swap, basically 11 for 4 plus. Brandon Ayyuk to the Patriots.

And that kind of wet my beak a little bit. That puts the Patriots... Multiple ACL injury boys. Yeah. And that gives the Niners a chance. If the Niners are up to four, Travis Hunter on the Niners, it's kind of fun. Please don't let this happen.

You know, the Niners have a history of those great corners. Robert Salah back with the Niners. It's fun. It's fun, but I don't like it. Mark Andrews to any other team? Buccaneers, maybe, Cowboys, maybe. That's fun fantasy-wise for you? Free up Isaiah likely.

to be the superstar that he is. I think he just hates Mark Andrews. I just hate that Mark Andrews is on the same team as Isaiah likely, who's one of the best players in the NFL. Well, it's funny because Mark Andrews has been one of the best three tight ends in the NFL for five years. You're right. I'm sick of him. I like that you hate him and it has nothing to do with the drop to lose the game versus the bills.

Why do I hate him? I don't hate him. I just got the ick. That's all. Oh, okay. It's not hate. I just also love. Isaiah likely.

You really do. I'm telling you. If Isaiah likely as a start out of TV, he's catching 100 footballs. 100 footballs. A hundred footballs. It sounded like a true NFL expert. He's going to be a big time

bastards he put up the fingers. He's going to catch 100 footballs. Seriously. That is like, that's so true. Yeah. Were you guys watching that? Speaking of the Kings.

Were you guys watching that game last night? Quite a slam dunk there by Shea Gilgis Alexander. Yeah. Speaking of which the torpedo bats with baseball this week was... Hell yeah. I don't know what this is. You guys have to fill me in. I was not on the internets during the weekend.

What's a torpedo bat? So the Yankees hired a physicist who designed a new bat. And basically, it's the same amount of wood on the bat. He just shaped the bat differently so that the barrel of the bat is bigger. And if you look at it, it looks kind of weird. It looks like a snake swallowed a bat. mouse. Yeah.

Bulbis. And there's like, and it's basically so when guys get jammed up, usually, you know, it doesn't go well when you hit the ball, like kind of below the barrel. But they basically extended the barrel down and kind of bloated it down closer towards the handle. So now these guys are essentially just like, there's just more sweet spot on the bat. Right. And everyone's all upset. But this still falls under the MLB regulations.

You know, it has to be like 2.61 inches in diameter or whatever. And it still is. And to be clear, they did this. Seven players hit nine home runs versus the Brewers. They're tied with a record for 15 home runs in the first three games of the season. Yes, they also set the record, I believe, for most home runs through any game in three innings ever with these torpedo bats. But once again, like the tush push, everybody can use this bat. Yeah, but the torpedo bats are going to catch on.

I love the idea that the sweet spot is bigger. I was thinking about this recently. Like, there are two types of people in the world. people who know what the sweet spot feels like and people that don't. It's like knowing what sex feels like really versus not. Hitting a ball in the sweet spot,

there's nothing like it. I don't know how you can explain it. Can you explain it? Do you know what it's like? Have you guys done that? It's like a cherry-pitter. I played based on my whole life. It's amazing.

So here's my question with all this. I didn't like that as much as I did. I think it's not. I didn't know if you were once again going down the cherry-pitter thing or not. Sherry-itter. I'm talking about the actual sweet spot on an baseball bat. When you hit a ball and it hits the sweet spot and it jumps off the bat like it was electrocuted,

there's that for High Fitz right there. It's just there's no feeling like that hitting a ball in the sweet spot of the bat. That's very true. It almost feels like nothing. Like it almost feels like you barely even hit the ball. And it's the exact opposite of when you get a stinger on like the edge of the bat where it like rattles your whole hand. Your whole body. So you know what it feels like it's kind of like when you vulcanize the whoopie stick?

Totally. the hand wallet, cattle prod the oyster ditch. I'm sure that there's a... You torpedo the cherry pitter. There's something like that in golf, I'm sure, too, right? Like if you're hitting a driver and you just barely feel it when you hit it. You can tell by the sound. But here's my question, though, for this torpedo bad thing.

Take this long to make the sweet spot bigger. What am I missing? I know. Here's the idea. If you make the sweet spot bigger. It's one of those things where if you're not following baseball that closely, And I love fantasy baseball when I do these things, but I'm not watching

as many Yankees games as I used to. And so you just read it and you're like, so someone just, some physicist was like, make the part you want to hit larger. It fits within the rules.

And I'm like, what the fuck do you mean? You could have done this the whole time? This is insane. Like the family guy joke? How was nobody funding this? The bat, you know those old yellow wiffleball bats

you used to play with as a kid and they're just like, it looks like a giant blimp, essentially. Yeah. That's basically what the torpedo bats are now. I'm fully into this, right? This makes baseball so much more fun.

This is like legal steroids. Hell yes. I think we'll say it's funny because like, I don't know, maybe the Yankees just crushed it off this guy. But it's kind of like the tush push where you're like, so you could just shove the guy forward? Like, how is knowing this for a hundred years? Like, I just, the idea that the bat could have just been shaped differently

and it's legal is mind-blowing. There's a great, I just looked this up. There's a great quote from, I don't know if this is real. You guys can tell me if this is real. Brewer's manager, Pat Murphy on the Yankees, torpedo bats. My old ass will tell you this for sure. It ain't the wand. It's the magician.

That hits. And it's also very sexual as well. All of this is sexual. It ain't the wand. It's the magician. I love everything about this. It ain't the wand. It's the magician.

That sounds like a Tomlin quote. That does sound like a Mike Talman quote. Someone get that to Tomlin's stat. Get that to him right now. I will say it's funny. Anthony Volpe is the shortstop for the Yankees was asked about it. And again, they all hit home run.

Again, the Yankees tied the franchise record for most home runs in the game. And also, Judge is not using it, though. Aaron Judge is not using it, even though he has like four home runs already. Volpe was like, yeah, to be honest, I think it's the placebo effect because it just kind of looks cooler.

And then we did well with it, so we think it works. And someone told me that the placebo effect works even if you know about it. So I think we're just kind of vibe it. He was like, I think it's all fake. We're just going to keep doing this.

But his actual answer was, I think half a percent of an edge mentally at this level is like really makes a difference. Which I actually think is actually kind of profound. But I also think it's funny that they're like, yeah, probably is nothing, but we're going to keep hitting this. I want this to be a thing.

I want this to be very important shift in the history of baseball. I sent you guys. I sent you guys a baseball clip the other day. Ichiro threw out the first pitch in Mariners' opening day. Dude, 84 miles an hour. He's 51. And he weighs probably like, 160. How fast do you think you can throw, Craig? You were a pitcher in high school.

Not in high school. Not in high school. Oh, in elementary school. I was, unfortunately too small. I was, I was actually very, Craig was all state. I was a I was a little mentry school. I'll have you fucking know that I was a really good pitcher when I was like 10, 11, 12. Yeah. And then everybody hit puberty and I didn't. And I was the only kid who didn't have hair under his arms freshman year high school. Couldn't play baseball. no cherry bidding So I was a real like Greg Maddox type

Like painting corners Speed was never my game Okay Um Okay so is that Can I throw basketball Or throw baseball right now You can throw those baseballs real fast

A hundred baseballs probably Could you give me a month to kind of warm up And not throw my arm out of my shoulder And you can ruin my life You get 20 minutes to warm up 20 minutes Well that's what he's asking you right You think you could break 80

No I don't think so either I think I could throw maybe like mid-70. Echi rode through an 84-mile-an-hour ball today. High heat. You think you could throw 80s? The best. My point was mainly just that.

It was way out of the zone, but yeah. Well, he was, dude, he was, it was, it was chid music. Theoretical chid music for the battery. He's set the tone. Chim music for Victor Wenbina only. Yeah, yeah. Dan Wilson is the Mariners, uh, manager and he was, he was, he caught the first pitch. And even he was like, and I think each row did like the, you know, how like when you're

warming up the, the, in between, innings and stuff. The pitcher has like the signal for I'm throwing an off speed pitch, curb ball or whatever versus like a fastball. Ichiro like went up there. He's like, this thing's coming in hot. And Dan Wilson even almost like didn't catch it because it was going so high and so fast. Do you think the team should like maybe the A's should start moneyballing player height? Like they should only get guys who are like under five seven. The smallest strike zone. Yes. Just just like nine Jose Altuvays. Wait, have you guys seen the strike zone rules? Yeah. Yeah, maybe it would work.

Have you guys seen the baseball rules now? It's so funny to learn the new baseball rules of like what the strike zone is. Needs to be like you eyeball it. Well, no, it used to be. But now there's like because of the Roboam, wait, let me find it. The Roboam dimensions, it's like a percentage. It actually is bizarre. Like the, you read it because it used to be, yeah, just you eyeball what the strike zone is.

The actual strike zone, for real, is, says Google Gemini. Uh-oh. So it's probably wrong. The strike zone is a rectangle. Thanks, Google, Gem and I. 17 inches wide. And it is from 27% of your height to 53.5% of the batter's height. That is the strike zone now.

53% and a half? It is from 53.5% of your height to 27% of your height. So is the Robocop doing those quick calculations every time somebody steps into the plate? I have no idea. but that's the official rule. That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. But only, I mean, if it's a computer doing this and every time somebody sets up to the plate,

it does the calculations and it creates the strike zone based on their height, I guess. But I kind of like needs to nipples. Yeah, needs to nipples. Yeah, that's just, that's America. That's what it's always been about. We were built on knees and nipples, you know. As my father before him.

Okay. I feel bad about the Brock Party thing now. You guys made me so bad. a couple other emails here we gotta get to before we get out of here so wait before we wrap so we are pro torpedo bat

oh yeah yeah it's called a torpedo bat I think here's thing so the torpedo bat very much is the tush push of the NFL right where it's like the tush push

the tush push the quarterback forward I don't understand this how to no and try that is there a basketball version of like how did no one try this you know what the football version is

the tush push deflate gate well they were all Footballs that way or footballs that are softer. Basketball? I will say basketball. I have one. I have one that I...

What if we just travel every time? That's the biggest... That's the biggest like... The biggest boomer... The biggest boomer complaint I have about watching basketball nowadays and I always send stuff to Craig about this. I'm just like, every time you see like a game winning shot, I like, that's a travel. Yeah, that's travel.

Yeah, 100%. Even the yokeet shot the other day. The yokeet shot those... Unbelievable. They took like six steps there. The buzzer be there. I think it was the Colorado State Maryland game and the buzzer beater to the guy in Maryland

had he traveled. Dude, yeah. I run to the comment section every time I see like a clip of like a buzzer beater in basketball. And every time the first one is like travel. Dude, send me travel compilations on Instagram of like Russell Westbrook getting the ball out of the inbound and just walking with it in his arms for like four steps

before dripping. And the other players like, what the fuck? I had these texts with Kevin O'Connor a few years ago or who's at Yahoo. used to cover the NBA for us. And I just had these texts that you could just scroll, scroll, scroll. And the whole thing was him trying to explain gather steps to me.

Yeah, yeah. I was just like, I don't, but why? I don't, it's insane, bad. These are some of the best players in the world.

How can they not know what to travel? Like, how can Russell Westbrook not know that he needs to start dribbling? And it's like sometimes they're so blatant. That's why the refs miss it because it, like, this couldn't possibly be real life what I'm witnessing right now. Yeah,

email is for Ringerman Fantasy Football at Gmail.com if you have issues with players. I think that, I think basketball teams, I want to tax substituting more. I think that I'm thinking about this more because of Tom Tibido and the Knicks. But like, I just keep thinking about we have two problems. All these players are taking rest days. And I'm like, why when Steph Curry takes the day off? Why doesn't he just play like the final five minutes of the game if it's close?

Because you're coming in cold? Yeah. It's dangerous for your body to come in cold after not playing the entire game. Yeah. So he sits for two hours and then plays five minutes. Unless he's like riding an exercise bike. So it's like close at halftime. He can't warm up.

So you basically want to have NBA relievers. Yes. Literally, yes, NBA relievers. Or even more realistically, maybe it's like elite defenders. You know what, whatever, it's a dumb idea. I'll read the stupid email from Canada. I don't hate it. It's not that dumb.

It's not that dumb, but I think you can explain why. What really fascinates me is that we have all these sports and then there's hockey where even the best players in the world are just on the ice for 90 seconds at a time in shifts. And I just think it's amazing to me that we don't quite have that in these other sports. of like a unit that plays together really well but for small bursts of time and I think we need that more like in football they have a little more of it

with defensive line sometimes but I don't know but if players are good enough and capable enough to play the entire game why would you want to be sending them out a lot because I was like a 40 minutes and we were playing basketball and we played for like an hour and then our friend Brian came in who's good

and then the combo of being good and having not played for the previous hour he just fucking rocked us because he was like not tired. And I was like, they should do this in the NBA. I'm tired. I can't guard him. But aren't the line changes because hockey's really fucking hard and tiring and taxing?

Yes. You can't be out there for more than 10 minutes. You're ice skating and playing a sport. It's insane. It's crazy. Some of the like cutups of just watching these guys. Yeah. It's like imagine if they played football on the ice.

Some of the guys in terms of like, skating skill is pretty hilarious and cool. Like it makes the whole Happy Gilmore thing like, wait, you're a hockey player. Like you can't even skate, you know? Like watching the guys go backwards where they like, you know, they do like the, I can't explain it with their feet where it's like you're waving them back and forth to like get going backwards really fast and still be under control. Like some of the skating stuff they do is like actually super impressive.

But the idea of just halfway through a play, somebody like shoots the puck to their side and then everybody just goes to the sideline and a bunch of other guys jump on the court like it's just so weird to watch it's crazy it's insane especially when you don't like really understand the sport that much i recently gathered i now know the rules of icing i get it now good job like ted lasso good work oh fuck i did in the jar shit all right all right so i just talked about stuff no hyphus brought up stuff i did i'm trying to get craig on board on my best behavior It's emails from Kenny. Ken. Fellow's good day.

I'm an executive chef in Wake Forest, North Carolina. The vast majority of my background is in New York City sushi restaurants. Craig and I were talking about suci avocados the other day. He says, Kenny says, we plow through cases of avocados every day.

Yeah. The quarter method is correct. Unless you're doing something fucking stupid like subbing avocado halves for bread at 240 calories of pop because carbs are some noise. Anyway, you quarter that bad boy first, then you twist it gently

and the pit just drops out. And if the peel is being bitchy, invert a soup spoon and run up between the flesh and the skin like silence of the lambs. Like silence of the lambs? That was unnecessary. Christ. I mean, a lot of the show was unnecessary today. Yeah, I use the spoon. That's good to know. We're at the cutting edge.

Yeah, I feel good about that. I think let's get out of here. Email us more at ringerfancy football at gmail.com. Thank you, D.K. Thank you, Craig. Thank you, Carlos. Thank you, Kai. Thank you, Austin. Thank you everyone for emailing. And thank you to all the gyms who emailed in. I'll gather the gyms. We've heard from gyms.

The adult gyms. The young gyms. Yeah. Young Sheldon's young gyms. Thank you, Lauren. Thank you, Simon and Garfunkel. Hell yeah. Sure.

You know, so Jackie was at an event in New York. A few years, like at her old, an old job of hers. And there was like, and it actually, it was, it's a crazy place. It's like, it's, I won't, there's like a TV show that. you guys know that's like filmed where she used to work. And they were having like this party. And she goes and she's like 24 and she like goes up and people at this cocktail party whatever.

And then she's like, ends up looking at a window with this guy. And she's like, hi, I'm Jackie. Nice to meet you. Like I'm, you know, work here. And he's like, hi, how you doing? Yeah. I'm, you know, I'm like, okay. And she's like, you know, I'm Paul.

He didn't say his name. Okay, weirdo. Paul. was Paul Simon. Did they have a conversation? That's incredible. That's all she remembers from the conversation. Honestly,

you're a musician, huh? That's cool. The balls on this guy, he's 83 years old to think a 24-year-old would know what he looks like. I'm Paul. I respect it. I don't know what Paul Simon looks like.

I don't think I... That's kind of what I thought. I was like, I wouldn't know Paul Simon like off the dome. Also, with all due respect, I mean, when I introduce myself to people, I don't tell them my last. name. I would say, I'm Craig.

Right. But it wasn't like, oh, yeah, Paul, like, nice to continue. He was like, you know, you know, it was like, you know, I'm Paul. She was like, he big-timed her. Cool. Yeah, I'm looking at pictures of Paul Simon. Oh, she didn't know it was Paul Simon. Oh, she thought it later. Not at the moment. It wasn't super when you say the word words Paul Simon, does she, does that clock with her? Oh, of course. Jackie knows 20,000 times the music that I do. Oh, yeah. That's fun. D.K., do you listen to Paul Simon or Simon and Garfunkel ever?

I like Simon and Garfunkel a lot. Grace Land is like one of my all-time favorite albums. Some great harmonies. Or what is it? Yeah, when you're singing together, harmony, that's right. I thought I had the Graceland album behind me. It's somewhere. I thought Graceland was where Elvis lived.

Is that the name of their album? Yeah. It's not, it's just Paul Simon, not Simon and Garfunkel. Do you think that he's mad that Graceland's like an Elvis thing know. I think he made out all right. Better than Elvis. Oh.

No, he's still alive, Craig. Elvis is still alive? Yeah. He's living his best life. Yeah. He looked like it. Too soon? I don't know why I'm going out to Elvis.

He died like 50 years ago. Too soon. All right. Goodbye, everyone.