The Ringer NFL Show - Power-Ranking the Most Frustrating Players to Deal With in December

Episode Date: December 1, 2021

With only two weeks left before the fantasy playoffs, we power-rank the biggest question marks in the league and help you figure out what to do with them. Then we hold Fantasy Court and read some listener emails. Sign up to play against us in our new FanDuel daily fantasy contest HERE! Power Hour (2:53) Fantasy Court (37:07) Listener Emails (48:27) Sign up and compete against us in the Bad QB League on FanDuel here. Email us at [e-mail]. Hosts: Danny Heifetz, Danny Kelly, and Craig Horlbeck Producer: Craig Horlbeck Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I'm Derek Thompson, long-time writer with the Atlantic magazine on tech culture and politics. There is a lot of noise out there, and my goal is to cut through the headlines, loud tweets, and hot takes in my new podcast, Plain English. I'll talk to some of the smartest people I know to give you clear viewpoints and memorable takeaways. Plain English starts November 16th. Listen for free on Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. To the Ringer Fantasy Football Show. My name is Danny Heifens.

I am joined by Danny Kelly. And Craig Horlebeck, who spent three episodes on injured reserve, but we've activated him he's back at practice. Craig, how are you feeling? I feel refreshed. I feel ready to go. My muscles have been lubricated. Wow.

He also didn't actually break his toe for people that were worried. We were just making an Aaron Rogers joke. Full disclosure, I was traveling. I was on vacation. I was on the East Coast. I did not listen to the Sunday Monday. Oh, yeah. Who listens to pods while you're traveling?

And there must have been no opportunities while you're on a plane or in cars. I was watching the horrible Seahawks Washington game on the plane. However, I started to get tweets about people saying, like, show me your toe. Craig, how's your toe? And I was like, did they say I had COVID toe? Like, what are these guys saying about? You'll have to go back and listen.

I'm not going to. I'm not going to. I'm just mildly insulted. You don't listen to our podcast while you were gone. It's fine. It's just all about you. It's okay. All right, this is Wednesday.

Every week we will be power ranking something on Wednesdays. Today we're power ranking all the episodes Craig didn't listen to. No, we're power ranking the biggest wildcard players for the rest of the season. The X Factor's. I hope everyone listening, every single person, seeing the It's Always Sunny episode where Charlie's the wildcard. If not, I recommend it. But I forgot that that was also the gas arbitrage episode where they were, like they found a $3

gas station and well, gas was five, so they were trying to do it. Anyway, Charlie becomes wildcard and he's like, wildcar bitches and cuts the brakes to the van. That's kind of what we're rolling with here today. Yeah, we're two weeks away from the fantasy playoffs. We have week 13 coming up, week 14, and then typically in most leagues, 15, 16, and 17 are your fantasy playoffs. And there's a lot of guys, a lot of guys who are question marks. right now, who you don't know what to do with.

You can't cut them, but they're not for sure starters, and we're going to try and help you figure out what to do with these guys. There's a big range of outcomes. They could give you three. They could give you 18. They could give you 20. It's like they're wild cards. It's like they could cut your brakes.

Wild card. Also, I just, again, they're like having Charlie swallow the gas to get it to a different gas station. Charlie, you're like, Charlie, you're swallowing the gas. He's like, of course I'm swallowing the gas. You're eating our profit margins, Charlie. All right. Let's just get to it.

First of all, you will hear, we're going to go these couple minutes at a time. It's power hour. If you know power hours, you'll hear this sound. Tom, Tom, Club. Hell yeah. Shout out Tom, Tom, Club. D.K., say something. What's up? I was just waiting to get into this. Have you not seen it? It's always sunny. Is that the problem? I forgot to watch the clip, and I had not seen that episode. You guys told me about it. So I didn't have anything to add. I was like, you know, in Major League when it's like, got anything to add to that, Charlie? No, not really. Perfect. Not the best color man in the league for nothing, folks.

That's me. This is golden. All right, well, you can start us off right, DK. Give us the number one wild card for the rest of the season. So wait,

I'm supposed to talk on this podcast? Okay. Speaking of the Washington versus Seattle game that Craig was watching on the airplane, uh, yeah, Russell Wilson,

he sucks now, apparently. He, or he's really just not playing well currently. Um, since coming back from his finger injury, which apparently he came back from too quickly, he has scored 5.6 points,

8.5 points. And then on Sun, on Monday he scored 19.4, which is, I guess, fine. Yeah, but the 19.4, I mean, can we say that, like, what we do, the deceiving yards category every once in a while? The 19.4 is the fakesest 19.4 I've ever seen. It's like Tim Tebow level fake fantasy points.

It was. There's garbage time, and then there's Russell Wilson driving down for that, that ending game drive. The Seahawks got the freaking onside kick. They were going to have a chance to, like, do a Hail Mary, and then it was, like, illegal procedure, which is just like, I did not know that that was Of course.

I knew they changed vaguely kickoff rules. I had no idea a guy had to be like inside the hash. If you don't watch this game, I don't know. I don't know. I never. High fits, there's 88 pages in the NFL rule book. Pete Carroll did not know that for sure.

Yeah, it's ridiculous. Anyways, so the problem with Russell Wilson is, the Seahawks offense like genuinely sucks right now. They can't move the chains. That means they don't have enough plays. Like obviously you need plays in order to get yards in order to get fantasy points.

Russell's just not doing it. There was a point in this game where the Seahawks got five straight three and outs. That's not ideal. They've done that now in two different games. But they tied the season high of five straight three and outs with the Seahawks. Oh my God. Are you kidding me?

They've done it twice this year, which I think no other team is done. It is pathetic. But that's like of design. That's crazy. Yeah, it's not good. The Seahawks have run the fewest plays in the NFL this year by over 50, which is almost a whole game's worth for what Seattle is doing. Seattle's averaging 54 plays per game.

So Seattle's averaging 54 plays a game. Take that compared to the Ravens who are averaging 71 plays per game. And then just like apply that to the fantasy realm. Obviously, the opportunity there for like fantasy points for all the different people in this fantasy on the team that we use in fantasy is just not there. It's a wasteland for fantasy at this point.

Can you play Russell though in the playoffs? Yeah, let's cut to brass tacks here. I mean, they're playing it. They're playing. Francisco this week in Houston next week. If you have two crucial weeks in fantasy, Tom Tom's playing right now, but we're going to blow past it because the next guy's D.K. Meckoff. We're making this like a whole Seahawks thing here.

What do I do? Do we think the finger is an issue or is this Russ mentally or is this the whole team is out of sync? Pete Carroll says that it's not the finger. I think there's probably, maybe there is something to do with the finger. Like he's definitely airmailed a few passes in the games where it's like, what the hell is going on? But then he's also made really nice passes like deep down the field. like he looks normal at times.

Someone, one of my friends on Twitter brought this up. It's like, and it's kind of like, I forgot about this, but like it's really true. Like Russell Wilson does this. He has a slump every single year almost,

where it looks like he doesn't know what he's doing. And you can tell almost immediately from the start of the game. Like he's just off today. It's just not happening today. Like the Seahawks offense is going to be terrible. And the fact that this is happening again is worrisome. However, obviously there's this like siren song.

where, like, it's Russell Wilson. Like, he could still easily bounce out of this. He's got D.K. McCaff. He's got Tyler Lockett. You know, their backs are against the wall. Maybe they finally start to put it together here. Well, that's what you tell yourself. But, like, dude, you mentioned D.K. Metcalf.

Okay, the last three games for D.K. McCaffee's at, like, 6.7 and then two. He went 59 minutes without a catch last, last night or last, whatever day it is. He's doubling his fantasy points with Gino Smith per game. Then he's with Russ. He averts 17 with Gino 9 with Russ this year. We got a couple emails from people that sum it up. One, we got an email from John that said, league context. I just got a hard no

on a trade offer where I offered D.K. McCaff for Hunter Renfro. That's John. Oh my God. It's come to this. That's tough. And they were the same, those guys are the same draft class, right? Yeah, I think so, with A.J. Brown.

Sawyer wrote into us that said, basically, he only needed tonight's money in football three points from DK Metcalf and he couldn't get, couldn't get it. He's like, Treyquan Smith hit that, Quis Watkins hit that. Tavon Austin hit that. He's not even owned. Tavon Austin. He's rostering 0% of leagues.

Tavon Austin hit it. So, Sawyer is like, the DB Cooper Award for the biggest disappearance needs to go to Metcalfe, who hasn't had double digits since week eight. And then also, Sawyer wants Danny Kelly, D.K., to stop rooting for the Seahawks because he's worried about distress on D.K.'s life. I appreciate that. And how that affects Calvin's childhood. And then Sawyer also wants Pete Carroll in the Burnbook. I think all that's accurate. Soyer is worried about the next generation.

He's worried about Calvin. He doesn't want the Seahawks negativity to, like, affect Calvin. and I appreciate that very much. Also, Hyphids, to be clear, he wants the D.B. Cooper Award

to be renamed the D.K. Metcalf Award. Oh, which is brilliant. Wait, also, give us another two minutes. We got to go.

This is the end of the Seahawks era. Like, Tom Tom will understand. Like, I felt like the Seahawks died on what, like the Pete Carroll, Russell Wilson Seahawks died. The first half was the Legion of Boom. The second half was the Russ Seahawks.

And like, I felt like this era died. It has to be Russ or Pete. They cannot run this team back next year. Well, do you guys believe in like, So in terms of fantasy, so the Seahawks are now 3 and 8, they're practically out of the playoff picture. I guess theoretically maybe they're not.

D.K., does that, like, affect the way that the Seahawks will play football? Like, do you trust Russell Wilson in this offense now that they're essentially aimless and have no purpose? Or do you think they're still going to play, you know, hard and try and... I think they're going to do the same shit. It's like... This is Pete Carroll. Like, he's like, I'm going to do things my way. Like, he said this coming into the...

Coming back into the NFL, because obviously he was at USC for a long time. and I read his book. He says in his book, like, the biggest problem I had in previous sense in the NFL was like, I didn't have enough power, number one, like,

you know, I didn't have control over the roster or whatever. But also, like, he just allowed outside influences to affect what they were doing. And he's spoken about this many times, like, stick to your guns. Like,

you have to do what you think is right. You have to do it the way that you want. It's like, do things my way, you know, like the song. He just really believes that. And so,

no, I don't think they're going to change. Like, this is their DNA. This is who they are. And also, like, frankly, with the way Russell Wilson's playing, like, why would we expect them to all of a sudden just, like, start lighting it up, I guess?

You know what I mean? I'm just not confident with this team right now, and I think that they have terrible vibes. Like, the vibes are off, really, really off. Everybody's mad at each other. It's just... Speaking of vibes, though, in terms of playing people, I don't think you want to play Russell Wilson right now.

But, DK Metcalf's a harder question. But do you guys know about the D.K. Metcalfe, when this streak started from of him having single digit games. The foursome, baby. The foursum. Did you hear about this, Craig? Did you hear about the fours something with D.K. McHav?

I don't think so. Okay. So this story. Basically, a, uh, an only fan's model posted, Tom Tom's perfect background for this.

Uh, an only fan's model put on a, I think an Instagram video or a story where she basically explained that she had, you know, D.K. Metcalf had messaged her and he had like, you know, she had gone over to his house a couple times and, um,

he messaged her late one night. Yeah. And she's driving. over. And then he messaged her on Snapchat that's like, actually just turn around. She's like, what? He's like, actually can come over. I'm trying to have a forcum. Like apparently he was at a bar. Here's what I think if it's, you messed up the story a little bit. Number one, she was like several hours away from D.K. Metcalf and he was like, hey, come over. Let's hook up.

And so she started driving. And then like an hour or two into the drive, he texted her and said, actually, don't come over. I've already got two other girls here and there's no room for you. I mean, there's no room for you. And then he changed his mind. He's like, what if she did? So she turned around and left. Like, because he didn't have room for her in his threesome that was already happening. And actually, uh, Adam Levitton from Estabash Rund was pointing this out.

This is like the reverse Bible narrative. Like maybe Russell Wilson's punishing him because he's a sinner. Oh my God. I think that then he did want her to come back. And then she was like, no. it's good to have a foursome. But here's the important part. Since this happened,

he's only averaging 28 yards per game. But most importantly, since this happened, since he failed to get a foursome, he's averaging three and a half catches per game. Wow. Which is just under four. How did it become public?

She posted about it online. Yeah, she had like a video. He never explicitly denied it. He did, it's funny because like that day or the next day, he posted a screenshot of his like Netflix account and he was watching. And he goes, I guess it's as good of a day as I need to watch this

and it was all dogs go to heaven. Yeah. Also, like, if you look at his comments, a lot of teammates have commented like, I forget who someone was like, hey, you want to play on our foursome this weekend? We're going, we're heading like this golf course and it's like, it's, I think people are making fun of him for it.

Anyway, so the bottom line is, I think we should move on from the seal. We're not playing either of these guys, I guess. Well, yeah, we didn't even get to the actual question. Is Russell Wilson even, is he a top 12 quarterback regardless of opponent? I don't think you can plan him until this offense doesn't run the fewest plays in the NFL. I agree.

So even against, they play Houston in two weeks. No? They played Washington this week. You want to see him play well. I mean, you probably have a better option. There's a lot of quarterbacks. And then what about D.K. Metcalfe. Yeah.

I understand if you want to bench him. Again, it's what D.K said. They run the fewest offensive plays in the NFL and they have the most three and outs. Like, doesn't that answer the question? Take the names out of it. I think in the past, like, here's the context I think is important. In the past, like, the Seahawks have always been kind of like a low volume offense, or apart from like the let Russ Cook era where they wear high volume,

but like mostly in the last few years, it's like you're relying 100% on Wilson having outrageous efficiency because that's who he is. It worked because it's Wilson. But now that efficiency is out the window. So you neither have volume nor efficiency. You can't count on it. There's always a chance that he's going to go off.

But I'm just not willing to take that risk right now. The argument for D.K. McCaff is that we're talking about D.K. McHuff not getting the ball, so Russell probably fix that next week of forcing it. Anyway, but it's the same thing to me about names. I'm going number three. It's appropriate that we took like four rounds of Tom Tom for the foursome conversation. Yeah, we're drunk now. Yeah. Number three, fantasy wildcard for the rest of the season. I think it's Sequin Barclay. And I think it's kind of related to the D.K. Metcalf thing of he's not producing, but he's got a big name and he's really talented and physically gifted. So you feel crazy for benching him, but like he's not produced. And like,

the Giants are infuriating. The Giants like Seattle, this is an awful offense. And Sequin hasn't had double digits since October 3rd. Obviously he was hurting that, but he hasn't looked great since he got back. But really, Sequin's like Joey Gallo for the Yankees.

I know I'm not talking to like the most baseball-heavy people here, but it's like if you follow baseball, everything's trending toward three-true outcomes. It's like home runs and walks and strikeouts. That's Sequin is a runner. Like he just looks for home runs. But like the- I found this stat and it kind of blew my mind.

But it makes sense if you watch the Giants. Sequin is 39th in carries over the last three years, but he's second in carries that lost two or more yards, which is crazy. Like he almost has as many negative, like, two-yard carries or more as Derek Henry, who has three times as many carries as Sequin over the last three years. Like, he's just looked, so, but here's the thing. He doesn't hit the big home run plays anymore.

He did it as a rookie, and he had a high ankle sprain in 2019, and he has not had the home runs. He's like a home run hitter or doesn't home runs anymore and he's kind of just not the guy. Yeah, I mean, this is kind of the perfect example. He's like the sunk cost fallacy as a fantasy football player

where he's the most difficult player to probably sit, even though you maybe should. If you have two decent running backs ahead of him, probably a guy that you can sit because he gets like six, seven, eight points a game now but because you drafted him like, you know, ninth, 12th, 13th overall,

it's really hard mentally to get over that hurdle. I'm still, yeah, this is the end of the day like you have to play him. I'm going down with the ship I guess because I'm still playing him. Like that I just can't sit him at this point. And it's hard for us when people ask us to start sit questions. It's hard for us to be like yeah, Bench Sequin

he goes off. We look like fucking idiots. But like we're getting to the point. You need to see it soon because if you don't, you start to feel like when is the good games? Ugh. Anyway. All right. Yeah. Number four fantasy wild card Craig Harris. Yeah. Speaking of when when is the good game coming,

it's Jerry Judy's number four. Jerry Judy since coming back from his ankle injury has posted, here are the fantasy points he's posted since coming back. Five, nine, eight, and three. I mean, this guy's not a starter. He has zero touchdowns on the year. And it's probably not Jerry Judy's fault. I think we can all agree on that.

Jerry Judy's really good. It's the Broncos' anemic offense. It's Teddy Bridgewater, who's, they're just not throwing a lot. They're super balanced. They run the ball a ton. They play good defense, low-scoring games. Bridgewater's 20th in completions per game in the league. and Jerry Judy's like catching seven-yard passes now.

He's a possession receiver. He's like a four-catch, 40-yards, every game type guy. And I'm not sure what his ceiling is at this point next to Sutton and Patrick and Fant and the two running backs with how spread out and balance this offense is. That it's a bummer because I really want Jerry Judy to be a thing. But I'm actually not so sure that he's not just Tyler Boyd now.

Well, Dika, is Judy Jarvis Landry or is Judy Keenan Allen? Well, I think I want him to be, Keenan Allen, but I don't think that they have the offensive firepower to be Keenan Allen. Yeah. You think you could get Hunter Renfro for Judy straight up? We're just going to ask, can you trade this guy for Hunter Renfro? The Hunter Renfro line? Click the Mendoza line for Fais and trades.

Oh, my God. I think, dude, this is that, I think this is an interesting one because, again, it's like Judy, he's been this high, highly thought of prospect back to Alabama. Then obviously he was the first round pick. He had a pretty good start of the season before he got hurt. he's back. I can't, I've come to the point where I can't trust anybody in the Broncos offense. Like, I don't feel good starting literally any of these players. Obviously, I'm out on Sutton.

He's in the burn book. Craig, if you didn't listen. Oh, yeah, we burned him while you were gone, Craig. Good. He was 95 yards since Jerry Judy's been back. I do, I do not trust. Barely more than Jerry Judy has. Or barely less than Jerry Judy. I don't trust Sutton. He's out. I don't trust Judy. I don't trust either Melvin Gordon or Giovante Williams because they're splitting work too much. I definitely don't trust Bridgewater, and I don't trust Fant. And I don't even, the hardest part, this part kills me. I don't even trust Tim Patrick anymore, guys. This is tough.

Well, the weird thing about the Broncos is that they might be a good team and even a decent offense, but I hate every single player in their team from fantasy. They just spread it out. Yeah, it's true. It's like the whole team is kind of wasted fantasy entropy. It's like. So I think Judy's honestly, I mean, hop in the green room on Sundays, download the green room app, Spotify Green Room, and ask us if you should start Judy versus whoever else you're considering.

but right now I don't, I really don't think he's startable because he has no upside. He's a flex consideration, but he's not what you drafted him for, for sure. It's been frustrating. All right.

Number five, look at me, I got there early. Number five, fantasy wild card. The rest of the season, dude, it's Miles Sanders, man. Let me just pour one out for the Miles Sanders managers this year. If you drafted Mel Sanders,

I am here for you. It's not your fault. Like, he had a double-digit game in week one. He has not had double digits at least in half PPR since week one. And we're talking about

the Eagles were not running the ball when Miles Sanders was the running back. Like the Eagles had a game where they gave their running backs three carries, which I believe was the fewest amount in the 21st century. Yeah, that was like an all-timer. Then Miles Sanders got hurt and Eagles became the

number one run heaviest team in the entire league while he was freaking hurt and Boston Scott was getting carries and Jordan Howard was good in fantasy. Now Miles Sanders is back on all these defenses are like, no, you have to pass on us now. We're not going to let you run. Let's see if Jalen Hurts can throw. And Miles Sanders

once again is still not a double-digit points. This is like if I got hurt and I had to take some time off and you guys started a bluey podcast without me. And then you came back. We're like, you know what? You know what? It ran its course. We're not. It was a limited series. Yeah, it's like if D.K. leaves the ringer

and then goes and starts a SpongeBob podcast without high-exam. That's exactly what it's like. So yeah, Sanders is a great one because I think there is a certain thing where I'm like he could have a massive like finish down the stretch here. He could be like a low end wide race or running back one and like it wouldn't surprise me at all because they run so much.

I think he's talented. The Eagles offensive line beats up on people like they're big physical. They have the run element with Jalen Hertz that definitely opens things up. But it also just wouldn't surprise me whatsoever if he continued to just be like kind of worthless. It's like this is the definition of a wild card. I don't know what to expect from this. I think I'd lean. to cut the brakes.

I lean very slightly that I think he's going to have a big finish. So I'm going to be starting. It does suck that he has a buy in week 14, which feels weird mentally to look at. There's a buy in week 14, but he does have that. All right. Number six, fantasy wildcard rest of the season, DK. sticking with the Eagles, Devonte Smith. I think it's kind of the same deal.

It's, you know, as we were talking about with the Seahawks, where I trust the talent. I think he's a very talented player. But the offense is just so low volume in terms of. passing that it's very difficult for me to put Devante Smith in the starting lineup. Even when he has big games, even the day after, the next couple days after, I'm still like, I just don't, because I have him on a few teams. I'm like, I just don't think I can put him in the lineup, unless I absolutely have to. Um, you know, again, like the underlying usage is strong. He has a big target share. It's like 20 something percent target share. That's all what you're looking

for. But at the end of the day, like, Jalen Hertz is erratic as a passer. The team is extremely run heavy. They're going to have opportunities down the stretch with their schedule to be in leading scripts, I think, so they don't have to necessarily lean on their passing game. So it's just baked in. There's just so much volatility with DeMonte Smith. Plus, he's a rookie, which is more volatility. So, like, if I had to guess big finish versus sort of disappointing finish, I lean on

disappointing finish. But I do think he has it in him to finish great. Like, we've talked about how rookies finished strong. And I think he's a good player, really good player, but it just worries me. Again, so, Craig, I don't know if you got to see the Giants' Eagles game. It was disgusting. And, like, but the Giants held the Eagles really, I mean, in check the entire game. And at the end of it, Julian Love was one of the defensive backs of the Giants said their game plan was to make Jalen Hertz throw.

And he didn't say it like, cockily. He just was like, yeah, that was the game plan. It was like, you know, Hurts had a throw out to beat us. And like, it worked. And it made me really worried for the Eagles the rest of the season. Like, this is an important week for them, I think, because, I mean, they're playing the Jets, right? I mean, if they can't beat the Jets, I'm worried for the Eagles' rest of the season. Yeah, I mean, it's like the Eagles that started out the season, there's like one of those teams

were like, oh, this team's not good. And then they kind of changed their identity and they started get real frisky. but I'm like, maybe they're actually not that good. I don't know. It's hard to tell. But ultimately, I do think they're going to run a lot down the stretch.

And so, DeMonte Smith, I'm just worried about. All right. Number seven, Fantasy Wildcar rest of the season. Craig. Pains me to say this, but it's Mike Williams. Mike, old Mike here, first five weeks of the season, he was the number one overall wide receiver in fantasy.

First five weeks, number one guy. Yeah, he looks like a legit league winner. Yeah. Since then, he's been the wide receiver, 62. brutal. Not been great. I don't think it's Mike's fault. There's a lot of factors that kind of go into this. Honestly, it's the charge's offensive line isn't giving Herbert enough time to throw deep anymore. They're conservative. They're erratic. Herbert's like average depth of target or, you know, the average pass the season has traveled seven yards past line of scrimmage for Herbert. That's 33 out of 39 quarterbacks this year. I mean, he's just not throwing the ball deep anymore. And it's mainly a product of the line. So if the line can get healthier and everything can kind of come back together as they head towards a playoff, run. Like, I do feel, I feel more confident that Mike Williams can bounce back than I do like Jerry Judy because I like the volume that the Chargers throw with. Mike Williams is still the deep play threat, the big play threat, not Judy. So I still think there's hope with this,

but there's going to be highs and lows. It's basically how comfortable are you with a three-point performance from Mike Williams if you can potentially get a 25-point performance the week after? and I honestly think that's what it's going to be like for Mike. I have real struggle starting Mike Williams in your important games. It's really hard for me to tell someone to do that. He's probably, when we do start sit the single hardest person to put a ranking on, obviously it's nice to have your weekly rankings. Like, we don't need, we need a range.

Because there are so many players that I think really just genuinely will outscore him every week. And I think we're at the point we're expecting the explosive game is, more wishing than worth expecting. Yeah, I'm definitely hoping for the charges to turn it around. Like, I wanted to happen more than I think it's going to happen. Who's been the more disappointing Mike? Mike Williams or Mike Davis? Okay, it's obviously Mike Davis.

Obviously, Mike Davis, but is it worth to, like, have Mike Davis flatline on you immediately or Mike Williams to, like, spike and, like, give shit, like, the Aladdin, fly you up in his magic carpet and show you the world? And then, like, actually, like, what a loser. I can't believe that. Well, when we look back at Mike Williams, Statlin at the end of the year, he's going to have like 70 catches, 1100 yards and like nine touchdowns. He'll be like, Mike was great

last year. Yeah, it's going to average out to a regular season. There was a month here. There was a month plus here where Mike Williams looked like the best player in fantasy. Well, we're like, oh, he's Michael Thomas. And he wasn't. But I think what it comes down really is the coaching staff

and the young quarterback and just not adjusting to whatever defense has changed. I think they were like, you can't have the deep routes for Mike Thomas. And they just never figured it out. And I don't think Herbert I doesn't need time anymore. The offensive line's not that as well. Okay, number eight, fantasy wildcard rest of the season. I'm giving an Odell back on man.

This is crazy. I mean, he was irrelevant, as irrelevant as Odell can be. The most relevant thing he did the whole year was inadvertently his dad Instagramming, and then everyone did suddenly LeBron James is like, free O'Dell. And I'm like, I didn't know he needed to be freed. Like, he, okay.

And then... Yeah, he's on a playoff team. Like, what's the problem? That team went to the division around like last year, but okay. and it was closer than whatever the Rams did, but anyway, he goes to the Rams, and he did have like this big play last week, and he did have a long touchdown, and suddenly it's like, dude, is Odell like, could O'Dell be like some incredible fantasy player down the stretch in December? I think so, honestly.

I weirdly trust him. I said this a couple weeks ago. With Robert Woods out, the Rams don't have a ton of options. Higby's not really doing a lot, at least the way they're playing offense. And he and Jefferson's always finds a way to screw up whatever's happening. It's crazy how, if you watch the Rams, how frequently, something always goes wrong on a Tyler Higbee play. Yeah.

I don't know. I think Odell, I mean, teams are going to be focusing on Cup. I think Odell's going to be serviceable, honestly. It's wild that Cooper Cup is going to absorb that for O'Dell, yeah. I think here's what O'Dell has going for him down the stretch. Number one, I do think that the Rams' offense is going to bounce back, at least a little bit. Maybe not to see to the point where we saw them in the early part of the season, but they're not going to be as bad as they have been last three weeks or so.

Number two. It's a very concentrated offense where O'Dell Beckham, Cooper Cup, and now Van Jefferson are basically running all the routes. It's like they're playing a lot of three receiver formations. And Odell's target rate is going to be strong. Like in this last game, when he played a full game, 24% target rate. I mean, that's like top tier. That's top.

That's high end. Like the best receivers in the NFL are like 30 plus. But like 24%, that's really good. In an offense that's going to pass a lot and score a lot of points, they have been over the season, a past heavy team. And he's good, deep. I don't know. I just think that the situation is actually lining up pretty well for him. And we have all this history of the last two years of doubting him.

But I do think the situation, it's going to work out for him. So I'm bullish on O'Dell, actually, to have that high end of the wild card side. All right. Number nine, wild card player rest of the season, D.K. Chase Claypool is an interesting one. He's kind of in the Jerry Judy. mold where if I have them on my teams, I'm like, God, do I want to start this guy? Like, he hasn't been, he hasn't been as bad.

He's not been like super disappointing, I'll put it that way. Like, he's been fine. But he had been last year particularly, like this really high upside, exciting. Like, you can have these spike games. I think he scored 10 touchdowns last year. He has one touchdown this season. Did you realize that? If you showed me Mike Williams' 2021 statline and Chase Claypool's 2021 stateless,

that line and said, guess who's going to do what this year? I would have picked Claypool to be Mike Williams. Right. The guy going for 160 yards on eight catches. I was like, oh, it happened. Like, he broke out. Michael Williams is 28, and it's not going to happen. Claypool puts up eight points every single game, despite being one of the most, like, unique, deep threat guys.

But he's oddly the most consistent, like Hunter Renfrowee nine points a game, but who knows how he gets it. But he always ends up right in that range. And it kind of, it's boring. Honestly, I'm not surprised by this at all. I'm going to be contrarian. I didn't like Claypool before the season. season. I said this and like...

It is not Claypool's fault to be... Last year... No, I get that. I'm not saying, like, he's really good. I'm just saying that, like, this Steelers' offense is not... Like, he'd be great with a quarterback, throws the ball up. But, like, this is, like, not a good offense for him to play in. And, like, again, the stateline last year was totally ignored by the fact that had four touchdowns in one game in a ridiculous cornerback matchup against the

Bengals, I think it was, where he just was a lot taller than the good dude guarding him. It had four catches for four touchdowns. And, like, you had nine on the season, but, like, you didn't have him starting in that four touchdown games. So I, this, I'm not surprised, to be honest. I would love for him to do good, but like,

I think he would thrive with a different quarterback than Ben. Like Herbert and Claypool would be dope. But like, that's not a thing. Catch totals in the last five games. Three, five, three, four, two, five. He's like, he's kind of Deshawn Jackson.

When you think about it, it's like, you're going to get two or three catches a game. Hopefully he does something with it. Yep. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah, which is what Mike Williams used to be. Maybe they're the same player.

Yeah. So it's just like he's the type of guy. I think the upside's there. But it makes me nervous starting him. I'll put that way. Number 10, wild card player rest of the season, D.K. Round us out here. DJ Moore from Panthers.

I think it's actually kind of in a similar vein to a lot of these guys in the sense that like, I trust the talent. I think he's an awesome player. It wouldn't really surprise me that much if he has like a really strong like last few weeks of the season or whatever and like propels people in the playoffs. He's also a guy who I'm very. nervous to plug into my starting lineup at this point. Cam Newton completed five passes last week.

Five. I don't know for sure what the plan is here in Carolina. Like, I haven't read into it deeply or whatever, but like, obviously, there's Ben talk that Sam Darnold is getting closer to coming back. I don't know if they're ever going to bring Sam Darnold back in or a role with Cam the rest of the season. Obviously, they gave Cam a pretty good amount of money. So I imagine they'll just keep Cam out there.

But I just think this offense is enough of a huge massive question mark going into the second, or like the, the home stretch here, that it just becomes very tough to trust what DJ Moore is doing. Again, like, we saw him in the year. This guy has an elite ceiling. But it's just like, that floor is very scary, too. He's averaging 14.7 points per game. Like, that's pretty good.

But I also just don't want to put him in my lineup. But the average feels irrelevant because, like, it's Cam Newton now who got benched for PJ Walker. So it's Cam Newton or PJ Walker. And if this is the Cam Newton. We saw it when he was like, I'm back. Like, this is Cam being back. Like, five passes.

I'm sorry. Cam can't really throw the ball very well at this stage of his career because of injuries. It's just a target. It's hard to bench the number one receiver on any team, to be honest. Like even Brandon Cooks is doing well.

And with Cam, DJ Morris had 100 yards and then he's had 50 yards in a touchdown. So with 10 targets and 7 targets. So I think it's still there. It sucks. It's not as pretty. But it is still there.

Yeah. I don't know. I think I lean slightly that he's going to have a good stretch, home stretch. They're also on by next week. which is a bite me worried. I just think it's funny

that you would love to see your receiver get like, oh, five catches for 100 yards, and it's like Cam Newton. That was like Cam Newton's stat line. As a passer, so, you know, that's never what you want. All right. A couple more, we're going to attend today instead of 12.

I'm going to give you a couple bonus ones right here. Ooh. Which I don't want to put his wild cards because they're weird situations. First of it was just A.J. Brown, who is not, like, playing. He's uninjured reserve and they're on by, but like, if you don't have IR spots in your league,

like, do you cut him? He's coming back, like, a little. the Christmas Eve Eve, I think, is when he's eligible. Like, has A.G. Brown been good enough to even warrant holding onto him for a bench spot if you're competing for a playoff spot to maybe make like the semifinals, like three weeks from now?

Yeah, I mean, is he a guy that once he gets healthy, you're actually gonna want in your lineup anyway? Like, that's the question here. Yeah, I don't know. You have to, but like, because he's A.J. Brown, but like, do you? Because he's, like, do you really? You don't have to do anything.

I think he's in the running. We got, the fantasy rewatchables are starting to loom, you know, that list. I think he's in the running for most frustrating fantasy player in 2021, man. Yeah. For sure. For sure. In all serious, it's just like, if you had AJ Brown, if you have an introdeserved spot, it's very easy, you put him on IR and you activate him. If you guys had a bench spot and you're thinking about cutting him or like, I'm trying to think of who's like another guy you might cut on like a competitive team. Um, I was just like

Jamal Williams, but now, DeAndre Swift's out. So that's a bad example. Are you talking about potential cut candidate? Yeah, like if you have to cut someone to make an ad. and I'm wondering if you would you cut A.J. Brown or let's play a name game here. Rex Burkhead. What? Burkhead. Okay. I'm just going to go up the list. Okay. A.J. Brown or Sony Michelle. Michelle. Okay. Okay. A.J. Brown or Boston Scott. I would cut Scott. Okay. I don't think I'm cutting AJ Brown still. You can't. Okay. Yeah. Those are the easy ones, but I'm saying, what if you had to cut Jacoby Myers? Versus A.J. Brown? Oh, that's a good question. because Jacobi Myers is like guaranteed it's going to get you 10 points.

But you're not starting AJ Brown currently, right? Like he's just a guy on your bench? He's on your bench and he's on your bench. He's on your bench and you don't have an iron spot. Like I want to go, where's the number? Where's the point of who you have to cut that you would cut AJ Brown instead of the person? Honestly, the real, it's a case-by-case basis here

because if your team is good, then you hang on to him because he's not eligible to come back until what, week 16? That's the fantasy semis. So if your team is really good, hold on to them. But if you suck and you need wins, then you got to probably cut it.

That's kind of what I'm saying. All right. Next fantasy wild card rest of the season. It's Amari Cooper. I don't, I feel weird putting him here because like he has COVID and, you know, it's like we are in a freaking pandemic. I'm not judging him for that. But like, first of all, his play was pretty inconsistent before the season. But now it's like, look, obviously the first, I hope he's okay. Apparently he's going to play on Thursday, which is a, actually shocks me because he's traveling with the team.

I mean, Mike McCarthy said, so today's Wednesday. Mike McCarthy said Tuesday that Amari Cooper was. still not feeling the best and has a cough. Why is he in the building? This is so bizarre to you. I don't really understand why he's traveling with the team. And like, he's testing his cardio on Wednesday to see if he'll play Thursday.

If he plays, like, do you play him? Firstly, single digit fantasy points three of the last four weeks. You don't know how if he's, you know, where his cardio levels at heart he's going to be able to play. Like,

this is the number one receiver on one of the best offenses in the entire league. And you're like, is he even a fantasy starter for you in the most important part of your season? I think he's kind of like, I'm like a wait-and-see mode here. As soon as AJ Brown comes back, I might not even start him that week because it's so risky.

And if you're in the semis, because I think it would be the semifinals week, right? You've probably gotten there without him. And frankly, you don't like need him in your lineup. So it's like, I think with the deal with Amari Cooper is, like, I need to wait and see how they use him, how much he get, how much playtime he gets, how this offense looks, because it's been up and down.

So he's the type of guy that I probably just wait and see how it goes. I'm not dropping him. I'm not going to drop AJ Brown, but I don't trust him either, and I'm not starting either of these guys. Until we see, until we see. And even when he's on the field, like you said, Hife, it's like it hasn't really been there. He's kind of honestly been touchdown or bust. There hasn't been a single game this year where he's had double-digit fantasy points without having a touchdown. Like, he's not racking up catches and yards like we're kind of used to seeing him do. He's just the lowest volume number one receiver on like a good team. It's like he's not in this Devante class. He's not in the Cooper Cup. Like, he's not even close to

that guys. And honestly, there's probably another tier of number one receivers above that, too, that he's not, he just doesn't get a lot of the offense. So it's a lot of questions. Okay. There's your power hour. You guys want to get to some emails? Yeah. Yeah. We have good emails this week. Emails at ring your fantasy football at gmail.com. If you've got fantasy courts, bad beats, fun facts, medical advice, but only if you're actually a doctor, but we'll take medical

soul students to. Um, Australians, all Australians can send us emails. Lots of Ozzy comments. A lot of, if you're on, yeah, fantasy parent corner, whatever you got. Okay. We're going to power rank where our listeners are from next episode. We're going to do countries. Right now, Australia's number one. Okay. Craig, you missed it in the Green Room on Sunday.

We had Hamish. We had an Australian guy come on and tell us how to say Blue Stone. He did it better than you. Oh, damn. It's saying a lot because you do it really well. Green Room starts sets at noon Eastern on Sunday. So if you need starts the device, we do it at noon Eastern an hour before the games kick off. Join Green Room.

Follow any of us on Twitter. We'll have a link for you on noon Eastern. Okay. emails we're starting the fantasy court today all right this is from I have lost who this is from I'm so sorry what a terrible start to this fantasy court

let me pull this up high fits oh my god how good was the blue stone did he mention my blue stone did he say it was decent I can't remember his was better I'll say that I think the thing that you need to get Craig

we talked about this on the thing is Australian accent, it's like you have like an intonation like you're asking a question so when you say it's like Blue Stone, like I'm Ron Burgundy? It should be like that or it should not be like that? Yeah, Ron Burgundy is Australian. Say it

but you have to ask the question. Yeah. Blue Stone? Yeah, it is like a question. Okay, the email was from Caleb. Caleb. Caleb. Sorry, I didn't hear you have it. Go ahead. It could sound like if you say Caleb like a question it would be like you're Australian

I'm not doing it I'm not Craig Ken Craig Ken I'm always thinking about it okay anyway Caleb Caleb seeks the fantasy court justice all right Caleb says I lost my game tonight by half a point

and I was playing against Russell Wilson and on the final two point conversion play he threw an interception in which my league is negative two points but it's on a two point conversion so it doesn't count and with like seven question marks should this be counted as negative two points

or should I shut up your decision will be the final So he's saying it did get counted as negative two. It did not and he would have won the other guy at Russell Wilson. So if the pick got counted, this is weird. This is like a weird middle ground because like two point tribes don't have stats. Right.

Which is like this weird loophole. But the only like the yards aren't counted. I don't think it's even a completion's counted. But if there's a two point conversion that's successful, that gets you fantasy points just the two points. Yeah. Yeah. Which is sucks because you're suddenly you have a play

where only the guy can get positive, but if he screws up, he can't, there's no pounty. So I get why Caleb's upset. I think, unfortunately, even though I would love it if Caleb had won on that play, because something good has to come out of that.

I don't think it should count as an interception, because it's not an interception, frankly. Officially, it's not an interception. It just isn't. And I think the standard in leagues, which is not super obscure, is that two-point conversions count for two,

and that's it. Yeah. You only get a PPR catch. Right. So I just think, yeah. If it doesn't penalize the Seahawks, it probably shouldn't penalize your fantasy team. That's,

that's, all right. Court. I got that, the ending to that game. I just kept posting, I just kept posting that, you know,

that gif of the guy going, of course. Of course. Like everything that happened. They finally score a fucking touchdown. Of course. I can't wait for D.K. to be nostalgic for this era when the Seahawks are awful.

And then they miss the two-pointer. of course. Who the hell is the next Seahawks quarterback going to be? Is it going to be the, what's his name? Matt Corral? How do you say his name? The old Miss kid?

He's just going to suck and D.K. is going to be like, this is actually way worse than Russ. Look, they have no shot at Matt Corral because their number four overall pick is going to the Jets this year. So it's not even going to happen. So thanks for bringing it up.

It's best for everyone involved in my opinion. Oh, Baker. Who's the worst? Who's the worst quarterback that could end up being the CX quarterback next year? Big Ben? Two. Like realistically?

Big Ben. well, Rathusburg in Seattle Pete, who's the most Pete Carroll quarterback that could be the Seahawks next year? Wait, I would love a year with Ross in Pittsburgh and like Ben and Seattle

and you two have to just live with this to be incredible. Are the C, oh God, Russ and Pitt would be like, I love that. Yeah. Are the Seahawks gonna like do that thing where they try and have like a gap year where they still try and compete

and go get like a Bridgewater? Oh, I'm sure. I am sure. Actually, it's probably going to be Bridgewater, honestly. I love you call it a bridge quarterback, but Bridgewater's just become the bridge quarterback. Yeah, you know one of those guys and you're like, talk about nominative determinism.

Teddy Bridgewater becomes the bridge quarterback, for sure. We have another fantasy court. This from Steve. Steve. Steve. Steve. Love the show.

My league has been around for a while, but this year we decided to switch it up and start a Dynasty League. It has been great so far. We didn't have to add a new guy who wasn't in the league for the years before. The new manager that we added got drunk at the beginning of the MLB playoffs

and bet his first first, round pick for next season. That's all, that's like a ballsy fucking. And he's at 11th place, so this is going to be like the second pick in the job. So he bet his first round pick to another manager that the Braves would win the World Series. And he bet this before the playoffs.

And he said if the Braves did not win, the other manager would get the seventh round pick. That's the whole bet. He didn't take any odds with that. The Braves win. He's like, if the Braves win, uh,

what did he say? You get my first. Sorry, I'm screen this up. No, yeah. the other way around. If the Braves win, this guy gets someone else's seventh round pick.

And if the Braves don't win the World Series, he had to give away his first round pick. So this man was so drunkenly confident that Atlanta would win the World Series. Good for you, Steve. And then, of course, the Braves freaking win. So this guy just picks up a seventh round pick somehow, like, like just, I don't know, like Russian roulette with five bullets and hits the one that's empty chamber. And then so Steve writes, my question is, is it fair to gamble picks within the league without the rest of the league being okay with it.

They're essentially gambling our money by giving a free first round pick. Hope to hear your thoughts. Yeah, I had no problem with this way. So he gave up his first round pick. That's what happened here. No, no, no, he's got a seventh. But they're like, if the, like,

if any other team won the World Series, this guy would have had to give up a first rounder. Is that okay? I'm confused. How many picks are there in a dynasty draft each year? Because it's not a startup drafts. Are there seven rounds? I think sometimes Dynasty and Keeper gets conflated.

I think that, like, Dynasty is, more like you have every player on your roster for, like forever. But sometimes keepers more like there's an inflation cost. I think sometimes though the terms get conflated, so it's probably that. Okay. So this is more of like a redraft keeper. Okay. So my gut is obviously probably

should not be able to bet picks with each other. Why? It's your own pick. I'm kind of like, yeah. No, no, no, no, no. We've had this discussion before that the league has to agree that you can, that you can trade material objects for trap. Remember when we had the

the discussion someone, one of my buddies traded a car for a player. Yeah, but there's nothing material on the line here. But that's not like a bribe. That's like you are betting on like you can do something and the winner, this comes down to faith, right? Like whether it's good faith or bad faith. And like, I define that as do you think this will make your team better or not? And so if I'm like, oh, I'll run with Craig in a race, I probably would lose.

But like if I'll run Craig in a race and whoever loses gets each other's first round pick, like if I think I can win and I make this bet it's because I'm trying to make my team better You can be an idiot and make a bad bet But if I mean he thinks He thought the Braves are going to win So he's like fuck it I'm so confident

I don't know why that would be a problem There's no collusion There's no bad faith involved It's a shitty bet It's not collusion like the car situation But I also see why gambling picks Is kind of like fucked up for the rest of the league Because if someone thinks it's funnier

To gamble picks than care about the league Then like suddenly you just Like what if someone gambles all their picks and loses and someone just has two picks in every round. Yeah, yeah, it's upsetting. So I guess the reason that I brought up the car thing is because that's not, like one guy's not getting anything. He's getting a car that has nothing to do with the fucking league.

Like in this case, it's upsetting, it's upsetting the balance of power in the league so much because one guy's getting a first round pick, the other guy's getting nothing. And typically when you have trades in dinosaur, or whatever, at least one guy is getting a player that they can use now. So it's like, you know what I mean? It's like it's the balance of

power isn't being completely like just one guy's getting all the power. I think this should not be allowed to stand and the guy should not get the seventh round pick and if he bitches about it, he should know that if they braves lost, he would have to have to give away his first rounder either. Yeah, to me though,

this is no different than a bad trade. This is no different than somebody just trading Jonathan Taylor because they think he's going to decline for Giovante Williams and everybody in the league is like, what the fuck, man? You're trading the best guy in the league for a middling running back And the guy's like, hey, this is what I think is best.

I think Javante's going to take off. I think it's different, though, because what we always say is like, you have a right to be stupid. Like, that's really what freedom comes down to. You have the right to make your own decisions, even if they're really bad decisions. If, and in fantasy, you have a right to make a trade, no matter how much you disagree,

as long as this person genuinely believes it'll make your team better. But that's within the context, I think I agree with D.K., that's within the context of football, like the NFL, and fantasy football performance. If you're like, I see where DK is coming from that, like, the idea of like, oh, like suddenly if you start to be like, oh, I think this is in the best interest of my team

because I really know what's going to happen to the price of Bitcoin tomorrow. Suddenly, like, what are we even doing here? I don't like the idea of people betting on draft picks. I think for this to have, for this to be legal, for this to go through, I think the league should have agreed on it beforehand. Yeah, you have to get the league approved. The brave won the fucking important series. Because it could be funny.

Like, like, I think there's a way to do it. Like, imagine if your beer mile punishment isn't just for the last place. It's for, like, the two last people in the matchup. And maybe, like, the person comes at 11th gets, like, a certain amount head start. And then whoever wins the beer mile gets, like, a better first round. Like, there's a way you can make a bet that's funny. It's just everyone kind of needs to agree before you just start throwing first round picks all the place.

The Dynasty League is, it's a zero-summer. game because whatever. But then when you like bring in this outside thing that doesn't matter, it like fucks up the balance I feel like personally. Also the reality is you're going to have a couple people in your, the real, like we're sitting here talking theoretically. The real answer is you're going to have people

in your league who get bored and think this is really funny. Or start fucking up the league. Or they do a power hour. Or they do a power hour. Okay. All right. You guys have convinced me. I think this, you can't, we're rejecting this Steve. You're not allowed to approve this trade. everyone keep their picks.

All right. Court dismissed. Bring in the dance and lobstas. Bring in the dancing lobstas. All right. Let's get to things that matter. Australian accents. It's an email from Jake.

Jake. Jake says, I changed my iPhone Siri voice to the Australian woman a few months ago. I have not regretted since time of 10. I'm going to do this. I don't even use Siri, but I'm really excited about Davis.

I did this. As soon as I opened this email, let me see if I can summon her. I don't really do the Hey Siri thing. I'm getting a phone call right now. It's not my dad though. All right. Hey Siri.

Calls every person. podcast. They sort of got... How are you doing? I'm fine. Thanks. Get her to say Blue Stone. Yeah, can you say, hey, Siri, say Bluestone or something? Hey, Siri. Can you read me the Wikipedia page for Blue Stone? Blue Stone is a cult?

Yeah. Oh, my God. I'm definitely doing this. My girlfriend has said as the British guy. And it's pretty delightful. Yeah. A little trouble in Paradise, our DK? Hey, look, I, you know, it's just like,

it's like, on the other side of the tracks or whatever, like just, it's her deliance over there. Like, you know, I don't, I can't do a British accent.

It's her little vacation to someone who does a British accent. I had a British accent too. Totally fine. Totally all right. I'm not mad about it. Don't write in the newspaper that I'm mad about it.

You get home and she's watching the crown. You're like, again? Oh my God. You Grant again? My brother had, and it was in the, he proposed,

earlier this year and in the middle of the while he was ring shopping they watched the episode of the Crown where they like take out the royal jewels and his now

fiancee was like her eyes wide and he was like oh shit I gotta get it bigger and go poorly he's like I don't think

my price range is correct all right I'm changing it to the Australian woman thanks for that tip Jake I like it hell yeah Jake all right lastly

a fun fact from Matthew Matt Matthew this is in all caps he writes all caps this is the entire email no one knows

concretely where eels come from or how they reproduce to this day it is still a mystery I thought this was a great one and it did send me down like the rabbit hole

or whatever because so basically it all started and I guess this was like a thing on the internet or TikTok or whatever a while I'm talking about eels here

like sea snakes eels there's a specific kind of eels that they were talking about basically this guy on TikTok was like I heard about this a while ago I thought this

was debunked. So let me go through it and I'll tell you exactly what happens. Basically this guy was saying like, we don't know how eels reproduce. We've never seen it before. When you dissect an eel, they don't have reproductive organs, blah, blah, blah. Like basically just like don't know where eels come from. They've never

observed eels reproducing or like hatching or whatever it is that they do. They just, the eels are there. Like, there's just eels and they don't know where they come from. And so it was like this totally mind-bogg thing. Because basically, like, the eels, number one, not only do they live in both freshwater

and saltwater, which is like the other thing that was blowing this guy's mind on TikTok, he was like, I wake up and the first thing I think about is how they live in both saltwater and fresh water. I don't get it. But also... It's like if you live in L.A. and you like spend your time on the west side and it's over like, like, wait for the same day. I have this an L.A. joke I don't really get, but you laugh. That was polite. I was being polite. But basically, so the eels What this guy says is the eels, they go to the Bermuda Triangle, no joke. They all go to the Bermuda Triangle. And then they don't know where exactly they go in the Bermuda Triangle.

And then all of a sudden, the new eels show up. Like, then the new eels are kind of like D.K. Metcalf. They're all just having foursums. Yeah, some of the eels get sent home, but most of them join it. However, I will say, so yes, Craig, you were right. It was somewhat debunked. It wasn't necessarily completely. No, I looked into this because this seemed ridiculous.

And the scientists, the scientists, the scientific community waited because they don't have anything bigger going on right now. And they said, this TikTok is really upsetting to our profession. And I can't believe we're going to have to do this forever. But this is ridiculous. We obviously know what parts of the eels produce sexually. We literally have eels in captivity. And we get them to reproduce. So we know that.

However, they admitted that part of the TikTok was true in that they don't have any clue where this type of eel reproduces in the wild. they can't find them and they're breeding ground, which if you think about it, is really just like banging through the door while someone's having sex, which is like the first scene, Tarians in a Game of Thrones that is like, you know,

you know, a door in a whorehouse is four brother. Like, that's really what we're trying to do, the eels. We're trying to find where they're at. I don't know if you guys remember this. I said this. One of my favorite things about nature. Like, my favorite genre of nature shows

is where the scientists are trying to find, like, where all these animals show up in the same spot every fourth year. And like, no one can figure out why the fuck they, why they do this, how they do here. It's like how cicadas. Cicadas come out every 13 or 17 years. How do they know to show up to this spot? Did we talk about the cicada thing here? Because I'm in D.C. Now, and the cicadas are crazy.

Is it over now? This is a cicada year, yeah. Well, in D.C.C. The city proper was fine. The suburbs, it was actually like a noise issue. Like, it was crazy. Like, harmful to your ears. It was louder than like a lawnmower. But here's the thing with the cicadas. It's 13 and 17-year cycles because a theory is that it's prime numbers and that it's evolution. And basically, all the cicadas that were on other number cycles died out because other predators evolved to come out with them and chase them down. But prime numbers are just prime numbers. Like they don't, you know what I mean?

It's like there's not like an easily replicable cycle. It has to be 13 or 17. There's no overlap. You know what I'm saying? Wow. Which is crazy. See, you know, so these, these speeches. are just operating on a higher plane than us sometimes.

Yeah, I don't think we're very smart, to be honest. Like, like, there's an incredible, like, you know, Chipp, Prairie dogs? Mm-hmm. Like, have a language. Like, they have words. Like, we just hear like, oh, that's nice. It's barking.

It's like, they have words. Like, eagle, fucking get down. Duck, duck, eagle, eagle, eagle. And, like, they tested this, and they have a word for black or white. So, like, it's a black, which is like a hawk. So black bird, sky monster means hawk. means hawk or like white one means like eagle and it's like wolf

they have different tones different pitches they have words the older ones teach the younger ones like we're like holy shit we're not having the only species with the language dude my god maybe they have fantasy leagues you think they have fantasy prayer dog leagues do you think they have podcasts? Did you guys know that Lisa Ann

the former porn star maybe current porn star I'm not actually sure? Do you know she has a fantasy football radio show? You could Google it, Craig? Yeah, Craig. Do you guys knew that? I just found I did not know that. I did not know that. She, like, calls fantasy football, like her new life passion. Wow.

Cool. Should we bring her on the pod? If we get her, that'd be great. We don't do guests a lot. That would be pretty good. We have one guest on our entire show's history, and it's Lisa Ann. Cross over. Yeah.

So anyways, I thought the eel story was interesting. Yeah. I think the important thing to remember here, Hyphitz, is not that it was necessarily completely debunk, but they don't know, they can't find where these eels are coming from. Well, this is what's funny. Craig, are we allowed to reveal what the next rewatchables is? Because I've got to be honest, what happened with the scientists debunking the TikTok,

kind of like the next rewatchables, as we were discussing. I don't think anyone said it yet, so no, you can't. But you know what I'm saying, though? Like, the next rewatchables, the conversation, like, oh, wow, interesting. Like, some of this is true and some is very false. But, like, what's it supposed to be? That's TikTok. It's an entertaining TikTok, and is that not the point that you were entertained?

I was definitely entertained. I read about... He was very upset that they have to spend the rest of their lives to bunking TikToks instead of like doing science. Well, unlike the movie, you can figure out what, how these eels reproduce. You probably can't figure out for sure, you know, what happened in this movie. Are we able to talk about this, or are we going to get fired if we post this conversation with the rewatchables?

Well, we haven't said what the movie is. Just don't say the name of the movie. Okay. Can I reveal that it's about the Great Eel sex migration or will that give it away? No, you can't. The Great Eel Orgy. in the Bermuda Triangle. All right.

Wow. Well, D.K. Metcalf being in Eels, really, like, I didn't see that coming back. I don't know how we got there. I didn't think that would happen when we started this podcast, but here we are. All right. That's definitely all we got.

Thank you, D.K. Thank you, D.K. McCaf. Thank you to that Only Fans model who put that on Instagram. Thank you, Eel, scientists. And, of course, thank you to the Eels themselves. Thank you, Lorne. Lord.

Lord. Thank you, Electric Light Orchestra. Oh, YOLO. Excellent. Yeah. I was thinking like Electric Eels Orchestra? What's your Spotify? that? What was your Spotify Rap DK? Was that an...

Everybody has to name the top band they listen to. Hold on. Let me pull it up. Also, if you had our podcast on Spotify Rapped, you have earned our eternal love. Yeah. That was really cool. People were tweeting at us. It's super cool. And also, that's actually awesome.

Like, I actually really truly appreciate it if we were on your Spotify wrapped. Yeah, we should have a competition to see who listened to the most episodes because there was one guy who was like 100-something. I believe it gives you a minute. listen to whoever's the leader in minutes we'll send you something we will, we'll send you something if you're number one in minutes My number one song was Ferris wheel

by Sylvan S.O. No, I was going to say, who's your number one artist? What's your number one artist? I'm boring, I think of mine was Drake. It was boring. Although honestly, I think it was Duolipa because I listened to a lot of music in the car with my girlfriend's phone. So the real answer is Duolipa, 100%. TK, you'll love mine. What was yours?

Krungbin. Yeah, me too, actually, Craig. You both had Craig? I tweeted this. I was in the top 1% of their listeners this year. Me too. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. Let's go. You both in the 1% for Cranvent? I don't have pronounce it. We're Craig and I are going on like a Mormon mission to like spread the word about this band. Yeah, we're Crombin evangelist. I love the Texas Suns song. Oh yeah, with Leon Bridges. I like their more instrumental stuff. I, they're honestly, it's the best

cook. I love the cook and it's the best cooking music I've ever come upon. It's great. So relaxing. I was going to say that so. You're both in the 1%? Wait, D.K., can we compare minutes? How many minutes are you at? Yeah, yeah, hold on. Let me pull it up. I don't know how to find this. How are you guys finding this? It's on the Spotify app. Dick, we work for Spotify. You can't admit it's hard to use.

Here's wrapped. Okay. Look, DK., just conveniently open that up super easily. Oh, yeah, this is so easy. I love this. It's like a little video. Okay, I spent a total of 1,082 minutes. Oh, you beat me. Ha! No wonder it took him. It took him so long to use the thing.

No wonder he spent all the time. doing it. Listen, I didn't know exactly which slide it was on. I'm sorry. I was having to freaking go through these slides. Yo, you want to create a blend? I didn't memorize the slides for my 2021 wrapped, okay? They have that this year. We can create a blend.

Oh, it'll make a playlist out of our favorite songs collectively. And we can share it with actually the listeners who made it this far as a reward. I like this idea. Or we should share them separately and then people can vote who has the best. I will lose. I'm disappointed with mine. I'm disappointed with mine. I don't even like my other number one song this year for the third straight year, by the way, was the Misty Mountains,

which is from the Hobbit song. Sorry, from the Hobbit soundtrack. And it's because for all you parents out there that haven't heard this before, because I've talked about this several times, and I've actually gotten emails that confirm what I discovered, Misty Mountains, and it's by Richard Armitage in the dwarf cast, is the best thing. It is like batting a thousand at getting a crying baby to stop crying. Babies are so weird.

It's like that's worth its weight in gold. That's worth a Spotify at whatever subscription in its own. That is nothing more valuable than getting a baby to stop crying. Why does it put your kid to sleep? If you listen to it, it's very, like, rhythmic and hypnotic. It's them basically doing, like, really deep guttural chanting in harmony. And, like, every time I turn it on, Calvin would just, like, he'd snap out of it and start listening to the song. And he'd be like, oh.

And then he'd, like, just, like, listen to it. And I listened to it on repeat for literally hours and hours and hours. I'm kind of surprised it's like third straight year because I haven't listened to it as much this year because he's like he's a toddler now. But apparently it's still up there. What's your favorite ELO song? What's this? It's like, don't stop me. Or don't, don't, don't bring me down.

Yeah. Don't bring me down. That's probably mine too. I also love evil woman. Oh, that's a good one. So. I celebrate their entire catalog. I like Mr. Blue Sky.

Mr. Blue Sky's great. Oh, actually, I'm going to change my answer. That's my favorite. I like that one. Shout out of Elo. Okay. I think that's all we got You know what ELO's kind of like

Eal-O Which is really what we're talking about ELEOs That's what EILs say when they have sex They go, oh Yeah Eal O's getting some O's Goodbye everyone

ELE orgasat Eal O-Face Yeah thanks It was better when people Could have figured it out It's probably more rewarding that way