The Ringer NFL Show - The Best Players Nobody’s Talking About, Biggest Discounts, and the Injury Draft (LIVE!)
Episode Date: August 23, 2024The guys talk all things fantasy football in front of a sold-out crowd in Seattle! They open by looking back at the Pete Carroll era and unpacking why this year’s Seahawks team is full of Steven Gla...nsbergs (a.k.a. players that nobody’s talking about) (3:32). Next, they revisit one of the show’s most popular segments: Name Brand, Off Brand (28:04). Later, they unveil the Injury Draft, where they put together teams with some of the most injury-prone fantasy players to avoid in upcoming drafts (41:36). Finally, DK pours one out for a few of his old go-to spots around Seattle, and they close it out with a special (in-person) edition of emails (59:14). Check out our 2024 Ringer Fantasy Football Rankings here! Email us! ringerfantasyfootball@gmail.com The Ringer is committed to responsible gaming. Please visit www.rg-help.com to learn more about the resources and helplines available. Hosts: Danny Heifetz, Danny Kelly, and Craig Horlbeck Social: Kiera Givens and Jack Sanders Producer: Kai Grady Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
In the summer of 1999, thousands attended what would be the final iteration of the Woodstock Music Festivals.
But unlike its namesake, Woodstock 99 was not about peace and love.
Joining me as I dive deep into this story about music, mud, violence, and tragedy.
From Spotify and the Ringar Podcast Network, I'm Stephen Hayden.
And this is Breakstuff, the story of Woodstock 99.
Available Tuesday, August 27th.
Craig Holbeck and Seattle legend Danny K.
You're like Pat Friermuth.
Everyone's like, moo.
Right, right.
Yeah, that's what they're doing.
Honestly, thank you so much to everyone for.
Please give yourselves a round of applause for coming out tonight.
I really like, thank you everyone for coming.
Like, this never gets old.
Thank you to everyone working here at the Crocodile.
Thank you everyone who came out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And also just right off the top, Helen, Charlie, Kira, Jack,
I. Thank you to everyone who takes a ton of people
to get something like this together.
Yeah, Kai's here, baby.
Kai's here.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We're going to get him to eat something.
Also, thank you to nationwide.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Sponsors, baby.
How many things are you going to make them clap for?
I don't know.
Well, they just clap.
They should work!
They insure my cat.
Also, wait, actually, Craig, this is not the first time
you've been involved in Nationwide.
advertising, is it?
That's correct.
I did a nationwide commercial in 2017.
Normal thing.
Okay.
Yeah, like a Monday night football nationwide commercial.
Do people know this story?
Have we told this on the show?
Craig literally was in a Monday Night Football nationwide commercial.
Tell us about who you stabbed your friend in the back.
I didn't stab my friend in the back.
My friend was trying to be an actor at the time and still is and is relatively successful.
He's in commercials.
Okay.
But we both auditioned and I kind of did it with him in solidarity.
I ended up booking it.
and it was a very small commercial
I was not paid a lot
but it was for a nationwide bit
that came on before
before like the final segment
at the end of every Monday night football game
yeah
yeah do it no big deal
it was non-union I got paid like a thousand dollars
do it is like the nationwide
is on your side
I'm telling that I actually had to speak in the jingle
I had to like everything I said I was like
let's just see who's winning tonight
it was terrible
do you guys remember that commercial like that
was him. No, no one remembers that. Why would you?
All right. So, yeah, shout out nationwide for, here we go, full circle with you.
And then, um, we're back. It's been a seven-year story.
There we go. All right. We're going to circle. We want to see full circle. We want to start out
with something we do every August that we love, which is the players nobody is talking about
right now, aka the Stephen Glansbergs. Yeah. Dooline.
I got to eat dessert alone
I'm like a fucking Stephen Glansberg
who by the way is from Vancouver
and lives there and like
who's from anyone come from Canada tonight?
Yeah
Wow
We've corresponded with Stephen Glansberg
The real Stephen Glansberg
The first guest we ever tried to get on the show
was Left Shark
Yeah
And we like almost real
He big-timed us
Yeah he did
He's a hairdresser in L.A.
We all so close
And then the second guest we ever tried to get
with Stephen Glansberg
who is like a very
very successful lawyer, like, doing...
Law?
Yeah, law.
Yeah.
Like, does, like, child law and was defending children.
It was like, I'm too busy to come on your little show.
It's a one-man firm.
We were like, do you want to come on our show?
And he was like, what, what's it about?
What am I going to say?
We're like, yeah, good point.
We should have invited him tonight.
But, you know, we were talking about who are the Glansbergs of the season?
And, like, who are the players, the teams nobody's talking about enough?
And we realized the team that nobody's talking about.
about enough.
Is the Seattle fucking Seahawks?
We would never, we would never pander.
We would never pander to the crowd.
No, I would never pander to the audience
wearing a Sonics jersey shirt I got today.
Lifelong Sonics fan since this morning.
I got it, yeah.
We got it in Fremont today at that store.
Yeah.
Shout out, yeah.
But, but for real though,
I did, I feel like this is where we had to start
because D.K., so obviously,
Seahawks fan. And so this is
the last time
the Seahawks entered a season
without Pete Carroll as the head coach
was 2009.
Yeah, I wasn't covering football at the time.
That's great. What were? Paralegal
software? Sort of.
I don't know. Not paralegal.
I was in sales
technically for a legal firm.
We don't have to talk about it.
But I wanted to just check in
like a little, honestly, fantasy therapy
emotionally check in right now. Where are you
at emotionally just after a decade
and a half, no Pete Carroll in your life.
It's weird. It's very weird. It's like,
Pete Carroll is almost like a father figure, but not really.
I mean, especially because he's like
around the same age as my parents.
I thought you were going to say you. A little bit older, but.
Just a joke.
Craig's 30 now. He can make a...
I know. Fuck.
But yeah, I kind
of like, him being gone, I've
made this analogy, it's like a little bit like
you break up with a girl, but you still like
their dad and you like want to talk to the...
It's like, it's for the best, but like,
you know, I'm never going to see my dad, like, my fake dad anymore, you know.
It's like, you know, and he's like gone.
He went back to L.A. I don't know.
What are you going to miss about him the most?
Oh, the one thing that, like, I loved
and also hate about the P. Carroll era was like every game
was just fucking stressful
till the very end.
And like, yeah, like, every single game
for like a decade came down to the last
quarter or last play.
But was that a Pete Carroll thing or was that a Russell Wilson thing?
No, it was a Pete Carroll.
All right, all right.
I feel like biologically, he had to have taken years off of all of your lives.
Yes.
Like, yes.
Which is exactly what I was getting to.
I remember very vividly one time on a radio interview, he was like, people, like, I don't know,
the host was asking him, like, why can't you just like win by more?
Why?
And essentially, Pete was like, I don't know, toughen up.
And I was like, fuck.
Like hit.
You know, like cut me deep.
So I appreciate that about Pete.
Love Pete.
Okay, well then, so now Mike McDonald's in.
What are you most excited about with Mike McDonald's?
Do you think you need to have a defensive-minded coach, head coach in Seattle?
Does that fit the brand more?
I don't know.
Like, for the region?
For the fans, for the culture, is it better if there's a defensive-minded head coach in Seattle?
Pittsburgh is like the steel town.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, I don't know.
I think I would say.
How's a layup for you to be like, absolutely.
Hell yeah.
Hell yeah.
No, like the defense has been bad for a long time, so it's important.
It's fine when they,
with 24 to three Giants, but in football, it looked pretty freaking good.
I guess that was Daniel Jones.
Well, actually, wait, before we, I want to talk about the sixth season, but before we move on,
I, you did a season of flying coach.
With Pete.
With Pete Carroll's, yeah.
and you...
Great guy, honestly.
Consumid, professional, super nice guy.
We always tell the stories of how...
But we always talk about how, like,
you went to Sean McVe's house and set up his audio.
We never actually tell the story
of how you had to deal with Pete Carroll over Zoom.
They did not fly me to Seattle
to set up Pete Carroll's situation,
but love the guy, super nice,
inept, technologically.
Yeah.
It was rough.
But again, though,
nicest guy in the world.
But, like, I was like,
hey, all you got to do is email me the audio,
and he's like...
Start from the beginning
I was like all right
open up your internet browser
and he was like back up
DK's dad's age
his wife was involved
he would FaceTime me at like 7 p.m.
on a Wednesday and he's like
hey I'm trying to record something for a different interview
how do I turn this thing on
I was like at dinner
I'm like ah let me step outside
so great
yeah Steve Kerr wasn't that much better to be honest
But Pete struggled.
He'd be tech savvy. I don't know why.
Luckily, his kids were young and were living with him so they could help him.
But yeah.
Was he just doing the bubble bath, like that radio interview?
Who? Pete?
No, Steve.
You know, no, this?
Steve Kerr took a radio interview and then, like, he made a sound.
And the guy, the radio host was like, are you in a bath right now?
He's like, yeah.
What?
That's awesome.
That'll be our next live show.
It'll be like a Seattleist commercial.
We can be in the tubs, holding hands.
We got it.
Fuck.
Right, no one
The advertising rights itself.
Yeah.
That doesn't leave this room.
Can you imagine if our show is sponsored by Cialis?
There's something there.
You're 30.
We're getting there.
Hey, thank you for saying him.
Yeah.
He's got a kid.
He's virile.
Something's not needed to be said.
V-rile.
V-Rile.
Proven for real.
Anyway, C-Hawks.
Yeah.
So the C-Ox, so the other staple of the Pete Carroll teams
was the offense just the lid on it,
the neutered offenses.
And now you have Ryan Grubb,
coordinator from, yeah.
U-Dub.
You dub.
What is the demographic breakdown here?
You went to Washington
or just to support the Huskies.
Like, give it.
Oh.
Okay.
You got to give them something to say.
That was like a mixed, like, smattering of booze and applause.
Well, the booze came in and then everyone was like,
All right, now I got to do something, but...
This is like a soccer game.
We need, like, the plexiglass around this section.
So it's more even split than I thought, U-Dub and Wazoo.
Yeah.
No?
No, it's not.
All right, all right.
I'm not.
So, Deke, how excited do you for Ryan Grub to run the Seahawks offense?
Is this a six-to-midnight situation?
Potentially.
Is this a Cialis situation?
Seales.
Well, hold on.
How long ago did I take the pill?
Yeah.
No, yeah.
I'm very, I'm cautiously optimistic about it.
Obviously, anytime you have a college coach go to the pros,
and he hasn't been an offensive coordinator in the pros,
there's a big question of mark of whether it will work.
But, you know, there's some really good signals
what we've seen so far in the preseason.
I saw this actually from Hayden Winks.
The Seahawks of Use Motion at the second highest rate
of the preseason behind only the Dolphins.
This is like the dream for football nerds.
Like, just use motion.
It's like you guys went from like a flip phone to an iPhone.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like, pull up an email.
Hold on.
Yeah, I saw that last year they were dead last in plays per game, Seattle, 58 plays a game.
And then in week one of the preseason, they had 79 plays.
God, got, that's good.
Literally 30% more plays per game.
Yeah, and that's actually sort of the crux of why I'm most excited about the CX.
It's not even necessarily grub.
It's what Mike McDonald's defense can do for the offense, because like you said,
the Cioxx ran the fewest plays in the NFL last year.
You need plays to score more points.
And so, yeah, like last year, actually the time of possession margin,
so the difference between how long the Seahawks had it versus the other team was six minutes.
No other team was worse than like three minutes.
It was like doubly worse than the 31st team.
And it was just because their defense was atrocious.
They basically could not stop the run.
Or Pete just loved defense so much.
Yeah.
It's more fun when the defense is out there.
So they couldn't stop the run.
run. The defense couldn't get off the field and the offense couldn't get on the field.
And I think that's like where McDonald could really make a big difference here.
If you look at like the efficiency of the offense, the efficiency of Gino Smith last year,
going from 2022 to 2023, there's not like huge differences.
It's literally just we need more plays.
Like get off the field defense and let the offense go do their thing.
And I think that's what they can do.
Just another stat to that that I couldn't believe.
Warren Sharpe's book, which is so fucking thick, I threw my back out at L.AX,
carrying that goddamn book around me.
my backpack, but he had this incredible stat that in the second half of games last season,
the Seahawks went three and out on 42% of their drives, which only the Panthers were worse,
which is, that was horrifying.
But who is the Wu?
Are you the person who wrote us an email saying, my boyfriend dragged me to the show?
That's the other girl here.
It's funny because it's true.
Yeah, we got the Rissilo demographic here.
So, where were we?
Okay, so I think in terms of fantasy,
I feel like unless you're in a two-quarterback league,
you're not doing G&L.
Right, as a starting quarterback.
Maybe.
Maybe.
He's a top-10 guy in 2022, but yeah.
Yeah.
We can't pander that much.
I already have the sonics thing on.
We need more plays.
Yeah, need more plays.
But so in terms of the Seahawks office,
because they really are Glansburgs for Fantasy, too,
Yeah, I do think a lot of players on Seattle are Glansburgs in fantasy.
Like, D.K. Metcalf, I do feel like D.K. Metcalfe is underrated every year in fantasy,
even maybe in real life. I'm from the West Coast, so I feel like there is a strong West Coast
bias for good players in the NFL. Like, I'm like, if Keenan Allen played for the Giants,
he would be 10 times more famous. And I feel the same way about D.K. Metcalfe,
we're like, like, this dude has like the personality, body, and stats of like Terrell Owens.
And he's like 150th as famous. If D.K. Metcalf was on the count.
Howboys.
Oh, yeah.
He'd be like the most famous receiver of the century.
Yeah.
And if you look at them, I mean, they're not even that different statistically, really.
In the first five years of each of their careers, they have the exact same number of touchdowns.
43.
D.K. MacK. McHaf and T.L.
It's crazy.
So it's like every year I think he's underrated.
And now this year, if they're going to have 30% more plays,
DKMACF is only 26 years old.
I mean, I would go for that 30.
I didn't say 30% more plays.
All right.
Even if you, whatever, be 20% more plays.
That's for.
So, for.
First of all, another thing I don't think we've said on the show,
but it's hard to talk to D.K.,
like this D.K., about D.K. Metcalf.
Yeah, yeah.
So I think...
It's like a trigger.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
So, yeah.
So I texted...
D.K.'s dad is here. Come on out.
Yeah.
He's not really.
No, there's too much traffic.
He didn't come.
Yeah.
But the...
But the...
I texted D.K. once, honestly, to troll...
Because he compared him to Odell Beckham.
And I was just like, get the fuck out of here.
And I just was like, D.K. Metcalf, I just honestly, to trigger him, I was like, he's overrated.
And I kind of put my phone down.
And now we just wind D.K. up once above it.
And I came back.
My response was like just like a wall.
It was like, it was like the eye reading.
I had 11 text from him.
He was doing like pro football reference searches.
He was like on his computer doing.
He is top 20 all time in yards in the first foot.
Oh, you want me to do that one?
Yeah.
Hold on.
Among all receivers, first five seasons, all time, all time.
First five seasons,
20th and touchdowns,
25th in yards.
By the way,
more than A.J. Brown
in both those stats.
You know,
and A.J. Brown was drafted
a little bit before him,
but...
Like two picks?
Yeah, something like that.
They were teammates, yeah.
But I feel like...
Love AJ Brown, but D.K. McCaff.
But this is very deep cut for you, though,
because I feel like I just sound like your dad
because your dad doesn't like D.K.
He's just like...
He's like,
I can't even talk to him about it anymore
because it's just like, you know,
pointless.
It's like politics.
Yeah, it's kind of.
But like he,
well, wait,
what is his exact take?
Like, he just,
he just thinks he's a little overrated,
and I think also just like the showboating
and then the penalties
just, like, drive him insane.
And like, by the way,
I've had,
I had this argument with him
a couple years ago,
and I kind of feel like I lost a little bit last year.
Like, even D.K.
Beck-F was, like,
losing a lot of Seahawk fans last year
just because he kept having
these, like, really annoying,
stupid penalties.
He's taken,
he actually, ironically,
after we had that argument,
he took over the O'Dell Beckham role in that he's now the really famous receiver
that all the defenders know where is very easily triggered on the field.
And if you just talk to him, he's going to lose his mind,
which is what happened to O'Dell and like anyone could start a fight with him.
And now it's just McHaff.
Yeah.
So that's the crux of the argument.
But back to you.
D.K. McHaff, I think, insanely underrated this year,
especially if they run more plays.
Yeah.
I think the market's a little down on him because touchdowns have been his thing.
In the last two years, he hasn't had as many touchdowns as he normally has.
And I think that's honestly more just a product of him being kind of unlucky
because over the last two years he's number one in end zone targets by a ton in the entire league.
He has 10 more than any other receiver and he's only had seven touchdowns per year the last two years.
So more plays kind of regresses back.
Luckwise TD in the TD category.
I'm like, D.K. Meccaf is kind of a screaming Glansberg.
This is our expert analysis.
They're going to run more plays.
It's actually, I did feel it when I was looking up the stats, I felt like.
So facto, I'm your boss.
This is like the fucking, like, skeleton key.
I found it.
They got, they just got to roll more plays.
But I also, but the, the dad thing got me thinking because I was thinking,
dad, I feel like dads just, like, dads have incredible takes sometimes.
Incredible is a word.
Incredible is like, literally unbelievable.
Yeah, yeah.
And I wanted to play a game of the guys called Dad Takes Exposed.
Yeah.
Which is basically just our version of Parent Corner, but it's like about our parents.
We talk about our parents.
Yeah.
But I like I my friend's dad has this great take that
My friends, he's like 65
He's like Michael Jordan's not the greatest player
Basketball player ever
And I couldn't believe that because it was like you think it's LeBron
He's like no it's Karit what are you talking about
And I'm like but every now and then there's just an incredible dad take
To run off that my dad's big take my dad is not a LeBron fan
And he's like LeBron's not the goat
And I'm like okay
Well you think it's MJ and he's like yeah but LeBron's not even two
Can't be the goat and I'm like why can't he be the goat
he's like, can't shoot free throws.
If he's the greatest player of all time,
how can you be nervous when he's at the line
with a second left?
You need two in a row.
Like if the alien race invaded Earth
and then we're like, send us your best basketball player
to make a free throw?
You're like, we can't send LeBron.
He's the most points ever, and you're still like, eh, I don't know.
Not for me.
Yeah, but we argue about that all the time.
Is Steph the best then?
At free throw shooting, definitely.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah.
The other take that, so my dad has this take.
This is actually about our show, specifically the draft show and the offseason.
We cover a lot of offseason stuff.
We have these opinions on the players and my dad, who's from Queens.
And, wow, hell yeah.
Queens, all right.
Forest Hills, baby.
By the Seattle standards, no forests in Queens.
It's not.
It's very different.
What about Hills?
Well, no.
That's not super different.
Forest Hills.
It's just to upbill both ways.
All right.
But my dad calls me, this is the third year in a row he's called me.
And he's like, Danny, Danny, I'm very serious about this.
Danny, you guys know so much.
You should call these teams and you should help them.
That's like my mom.
My mom's always like, my mom's like, you should create an app.
I'm like, yeah, mom.
Yeah, we all should, really.
People are super stoked on apps these days.
Make one of those apps.
Yeah.
Every year that my dad is like, you guys, you, Danny, Ben, Craig, Connie, you guys all know so much.
Like, these teams, they never make the right picks.
You should really, you could help them.
You could consult.
They could pay you.
And I'm like, they got it.
They're not going to do that, man.
Maybe Ben, maybe Ben.
Not with that attitude.
They're not going to do that, man.
Jesus.
I could be a GM.
That's true.
I could.
Just first move.
Hire Bill Belichick.
Here we go.
Like, what about the?
the guy who won
eight Super Bowls.
Jesus.
He's a podcaster now.
He's a, yeah.
So he has our job.
Yeah.
I could do his fucking job.
Yeah.
Would it have taken Tyquan Thornton.
I could tell you that much.
Oh my God.
Wow.
Thornton's just catching strays over here.
But back to the Syorks real quick.
The other thing,
so Metcalf, I think Lockett,
ah,
here's my thing with Tyler Lockett.
So, you know, probably the worst season
since he became a start
or he didn't even know, like,
900 years.
I think it's really simple.
He told Adam Schaefter a few years ago
that he was a virgin, he was saving himself for marriage.
All I'm saying is he got married last year
in the summer, didn't play that well.
I feel like
the sex took away from his game.
It's like a boxer.
Yeah, he's like a boxer.
Low T now. He has low T.
He's low T.
Like Tyler Lott.
Is that what his nickname is? Tyler, a little low.
He was the highest T guy in the NFL.
So I'm out on Tyler Lockett.
Wow, that's good.
That was good.
That was good.
That was good.
By the way, he actually had the most targets on the team last year.
Ah!
Just FYI.
But it's high in T, but low in T.
DK, rank the Seahawks wide receivers for fantasy.
I mean, I think it has to be DK and then JSN is going to lead Prague.
And then...
You do?
You think JSN's two?
Yeah.
Oh.
Yeah.
Well, JSA, he was the Bo Nix of receivers last year.
A third of his targets were out of his targets.
we're at her behind the line of scrimmage.
Yeah, definitely, definitely not his fault.
He was, no, but he, I think he's really,
I mean, he's not the fastest player in the world,
but like, I think that he's just such a,
it's not even a smart way to use him.
I don't really get why they did that.
And ironically, so Waldron, Shane Wald,
and again, the best quote of the whole off season
was Shane Waldron left to see Ox Offense
coordinator job to go to Chicago.
And then,
and then, you know, this was the best quote.
This was the best quote ever.
Wait, first of all, Kyle, we need that video later
of me just saying Shane Waldron left
and everyone applauding unprompted.
But then they asked...
He's here.
He's like, yeah.
And it was at the Super Bowl
where they had just...
Players going through the car wash
during his interviews.
And they just...
Chicago Radio just asks layup question to J.S.N.
They're like, hey, so what would you say
to Chicago fans about...
Her receivers?
What can they can expect about Shane Waldron?
And J.S.N. was just like, yeah.
No, he goes, are we live?
Are we live?
It took him 10 seconds
and that's the first thing he could think of.
Are we live?
Bad sign.
And then they're like, yes.
And he's like,
Oh.
Good luck with that.
Holy cow.
But yeah, I think he'll be good.
And also shout out Noah Fant,
who is somehow only 26 years old
and now actually gets.
So I think, I think, yeah, more plays.
But really, though, there is as dumb as it is.
Sometimes we make this shit complicated
for fantasy and then also for the real NFL.
There is no bigger jump you can make
than last in place to top five.
Like, there isn't actually a larger jump you can make.
Yeah, it's why Walker, Kenneth Walker's another interesting guy
because there's kind of like,
There's some Sequin Barclay, Bill Simmons.
That's the best running back I've ever seen in my life.
Energy to Kenneth Walker.
There are certain runs where you're like, this guy just moves different.
Just ignore the other ones.
Yeah, like his highlight reel is the best in the league.
Kenneth Walker.
But then they draft Charbonnet.
He mixed in a little bit last year.
The first half of the season, Walker was like a top 10, top 12 guy.
Then Charbonnet mixes in a little bit more.
And he's like a top 30 guy now, Kenneth Walker.
And so it's hard with the new coaching staff coming in.
Walker's not cheap in drafts right now.
But like we said, more plays, better offense, better offensive line.
Walker's a guy who I think is potentially, and the way that they're talking about him is that they love Walker much more than Charbonnet right now.
And so it's like maybe he is one of the biggest Klanenbergs at the running back position.
And Craig's best take is that Zach Sharbany and Ken Walker have the wrong names.
They should switch.
100%.
But Ken Walker is the plotting.
More like a runner.
Fuck, man.
Yeah, nice.
We're better than that.
Ken Runner.
The wazoo guys.
love that.
So, D.Ks, just to put a button in the Seahawks stuff, what is keeping you up at night about
this, like, if the Seahawks don't make the playoffs, it is because of what?
The linebackers, I guess, and the offensive line.
So two important things.
There's a little bit of projection here.
So you're still worried about the personnel at the linebacker position in particular.
There's, like, not much proven there in terms of, especially in the scheme and what Mike
McDonald's going to do.
And then the offensive line, honestly, like, I think maybe I'm too close to it.
I came into the offseason like, oh, yeah, the offensive line, it's like fine.
And then everywhere you read now, it's like the worst in the NFL.
And it's like lowest habit of any NFL team is the Seahawks on their line.
It's because you have the rookie contracts to tackle, but.
Yeah.
And I don't know.
It doesn't sound like they're like the most healthy group right now.
And so that's a huge worry.
And that's where all this could kind of fall apart.
But I don't know, weird stuff happens every year.
Like maybe this offense line will just be average and that'll be good enough to
get this offense to be top 10 again.
And I also think it'll be really exciting for you to have Mike McDonald and running this
defense and everything.
And it's going to be, I think there's going to be a gap in just the Pete Carroll line them
up and play and like, you know what we're going to do, but we're going to be better
at it than you versus Mike McDonald where, as I've said before, the hot dogs and buns, like
it's just having, they're going to make them keep in too many blocks.
Do that one again.
Fuck.
No, people are like, no, don't do it.
The point is just.
I just heard the crowd roll their eyes.
Yeah, exactly.
You heard an eye roll.
But I will say, I think it's going to take time for them to really implement.
meant that system, like even Baltimore is an update.
I will, the other, just while we're on the plays thing, the flip side is, we can talk
all the complexities and scheme and everything.
The Seahawks missed the most tackles last year.
Yeah.
And I think that's the first thing you want to see is forget the scheme, forget all the weird,
exotic non-blitz blitzes, just like what you want to see in the beginning from a team with
the new coach and an offensive coach is like, are they going to not fucking miss?
They missed 154 tackles last year.
Like, that's just, I think that's the easiest thing you can see with the new coaching
staff. This episode is brought to you by Nationwide. Did you know, Nationwide is so much more than a
great insurance company. They're also one of America's largest financial services companies. It's like
how the best fantasy players are more than just one thing too, like the quarterback who can go for
100 rushing yards or the running back, who's also a PPR monster. So when it comes to protecting
your belongings and financial future, you'll definitely want nationwide on your team. For your
insurance and financial needs, nationwide is on your side. Learn
more at nationwide.com.
Nationwide Investment Services Corporation,
member FINRA, Columbus, Ohio.
Next up here, I want to do
another favorite
segment of ours, which is
name brand, off brand. And
again, I mean, you can kind of figure it out,
but they're fantasy rankings. We have our rankings
at fantasyfoball.com.
Wow, I'm going to clap for that.
URLs. People clap
for the URL.
Earl.
I'm not saying.
Raise your hand if you've ever typed in a URL after listening to our podcast into your search browser.
One, two, three, four.
Oh,
several.
It worked.
I'm not saying you went to the hyperlink.
I'm saying you typed it in physically.
Okay.
Raise your hand if you, before listening to our show, ever pronounced it Earl.
Yeah.
Fucking.
It's just.
None.
One person.
Is that what I did?
Did I do that?
You did.
Tiny Earl.
He called it Earl for a year.
I didn't know.
I didn't know what it was called.
Anyway, we do name brand and off brand.
Obviously, there are just some players that we kind of scroll down 40 spots.
And you're like, damn, that guy's kind of like that guy.
But I wanted to start with Anthony Richardson, the Colts quarterback.
And he kind of just, let's be real.
Kind of came up out of nowhere, right?
Like he was just like randomly just, oh, going to be the fourth pick of the draft.
And you're like, now he's like, oh, he's just going to be a top 60 pick.
And you're like, damn, it's got played 11 quarters last year.
I barely know anything about this guy?
And I'm like, you know how everyone kind of just started going to, like, Portugal this year?
Like, everyone you know, just like, oh, Tokyo or Tuskegee or I'm like Portugal.
I mean, I don't even know that many cities in Portugal.
Lisbon.
Is that how you say it?
Uh, not when you're there.
Lisbon.
Lisbon.
They don't call it that.
About the pronunciation guy.
In Portuguese, it's not Lisbon.
What is it?
Like Lisboa or something.
Lisboa.
Who's Boa?
Oh, Assassin's Creed, right.
That's where, okay, got it.
Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I learned all my history from that.
But I just feel like it's very similar to me
where it's just like Anthony Richardson's like this big expensive trip to Portugal.
And I'm like, that looks so awesome,
but I kind of want to let someone else do that.
And then I look at Jaden Daniels,
who's the quarterback for Washington.
And I'm like, damn, you want like this crazy rushing upside
and a guy 50 spots later?
It kind of reminds me of, like, you know, you could do this crazy Tuscan vacation,
like Anthony Richardson and go to Italy or in Tuscany.
You know what?
You could just go to, like, fucking Temecula.
And, like, that's Jaden Daniels.
Temecula is north of San Diego, and it's like these vineyards.
It looks exactly like Tuscany.
It's the same thing.
Like, Google image it.
It's identical.
And I'm like, just, you know, it's so much cheaper.
Oh, no, what did you yell about Temecula?
The food's not the same, but it's close.
Right, right.
I don't know what that word meant.
But I just think Temecula, is there a Washington comp for Temecula?
There was a meme like Meet Me and Temecula.
Oh, yeah, the Meet Me and Temecula.
Yeah.
A fight happened.
I don't know.
Or didn't.
I don't know.
There's a lot of cities like that, though, especially in California.
Like Solvang looks like Denmark.
It's like, just go to Solvang.
It looks like...
Yeah, I was going to do one for...
Catalina Island honestly looks like Italy in certain areas.
Sure.
You stole my answer.
Yeah.
I was going to say...
If you don't want to go to Munich for October Fest,
just go to Leavenworth for October.
Yeah.
For those who don't know, Craig,
it's a little German village in the mountains.
Wonderful.
For some reason.
We were just saying,
that Seattle kind of looked like Stockholm.
Yeah, it did.
Wait, what do you mean?
Do you eat German village in the mountains here?
Yeah, in Washington.
This place is awesome.
It really is.
But really, the Jane Daniels thing, really,
it's like Anthony Richardson.
I'm like, number one in fancy points per dropback,
had 18 points in like,
minutes, which I'm obsessed with.
But also, then Jane Daniels, I'm like,
is the only quarterback in the history of Division I
College football to have 350 passing yards
and 200 rushing yards in a game.
He's like a hundredth.
So, yeah, Temecula.
Temecula's great.
And even if you don't want to go to Temecula,
shit, you could get Justin Fields off waivers.
He's like Olive Garden.
Just Google image.
Yeah.
Capri.
Literally.
When you're here, your family.
Yeah, sure.
Anyway.
You guys, any name brand off, brands?
I think that honestly, like, the off-brand version of Devon A-chan is just Rahim Mosterd.
This switched.
Yeah, it's like, you know how Lisa Bonnet is Zoe Kravitz's mom?
Where are you going with this?
But if you squint, it kind of look the same.
They do look alike.
And I'm like, Rahim Moster, he's a little older.
You squint, it's like, you're kind of just getting all the A-chan stuff.
fucking five rounds later.
You know what I mean?
It's like types of plays.
Yeah.
I mean, he's the starter in Miami.
He led the league in touchdowns last year.
He's in the exact same situation.
And you can get him 75th overall.
Like, what is, what's going on?
I'm sure.
A. Chan led the league in yards per carry.
Like, were he most like seventh?
Should we change his, like,
our rankings, we have a bottom line for every player.
Should we just call him Lisa Bonnet?
Lisa Bonnet.
Yeah.
Jason Mom was married to her.
squinted to be sorry.
I just think you could also draft both.
Like if you get A. Chan in the second or third round and then Moster in the seventh or eighth round or whatever he's going,
you could honestly start them both and get enough points out of both of them when they're healthy.
The Dolphins or Zoe Kravitz and Bonnet?
Well, if you're lucky enough, both.
But yeah, I'm just like, and then if one of them gets hurt, then the other one gets even better.
You can start them both and they almost act as each other's handcuff.
It's crazy.
He's going 75th overall, Rahim Moster.
He's the best running back in the league.
last year. Nothing's changed. He's still the starter on the team.
I also think, despite everything that happened with the dolphins last year,
we're underrating that all the motion shit they do.
It's for the running game, honestly.
Like all the cool motions and everything,
they just play Canadian football. Shout out to the Canadians.
Like, all the...
Oh, he's pointing like, not me.
I got the Bears hat on.
But, like, all the dolphins, all the stuff they're doing,
they're just doing Canadian football where you can run forward at the snap.
And Mike McDaniel's like, let's just not turn and then, like, do that.
But it's all the block.
It's to create different blocking angles.
And it's like, yeah, it's like just take the weird smart running guy.
Yeah, I mean, for any worries that you have about him, it's all baked in.
This guy's going 75th overall.
That's a good call.
Also, I can't, Mike McDaniel was Kyle Shannon's run game coordinator.
Yeah.
I think, yeah, Lisa Bonnet.
Still got it.
Zoe Kravitz was great in Big Little Lies, Season 2.
Yeah.
That was really good.
And the Batman.
She was in that?
Yeah.
With Affleck?
No, the newest one.
Oh, my God.
The Matt Reeves one with Robert Pattinson.
Did he not just make a Batman movie?
What the fuck?
There are a lot.
You didn't know there was a Batman movie?
A more recent one with Robert Pattinson?
You didn't know that?
Oh, I thought, did that come out?
Yes, two years ago.
It made a ton of money.
When did the Affleck one come out?
A long time ago.
A long time.
Eight years ago.
The Patton's, all right, whatever.
Was it good?
It was really good.
Oh, it was sick.
Yeah.
All right, whatever, man.
But if you squint, it feels like Lisa Bonnet's in it.
Which is fine.
Just wake me up with Danny.
It is like a very, it's like a dark and like moody movie.
Yeah, it is.
There's a lot of like really fast cuts.
Yeah.
You might not be able to tell.
Yeah.
All right.
Should we move on from that one?
Oh, yeah.
I was nervous about that one.
I was like, do people know who Lisa Bonnet?
It worked.
That went over well.
They went along with it.
Yeah.
All right.
I'm going to do a four-person tight end one.
Okay.
Just got kind of boasts of the tight end.
Okay, so name brand offrand.
Dalton Kincaid.
He's like a Pappy Van Winkle, very expensive.
Whiskey.
Okay.
For those who know, it's like $1,000 a bottle.
My cousin, when he met his father-in-law, he was at his house,
and his now wife just said, make whatever for my dad's thing.
And my cousin just grabbed the pappy, not knowing what it was.
Mixed it with Diet Coke.
Oh.
Tough.
And that's how they met.
His father-in-law came out to the pool and was like,
what the fuck is this?
And he put an empty bottle of pappy.
All right.
Anyway, so and then from there.
All right.
Cool story.
So Dalton Kikade.
So the off-brand version of that would be Brock Bowers,
who another young on the come-up tight end,
very versatile, moves around.
He's more of a receiver than a tight end.
Competing against another tight end on his team.
All these guys, Craig, have other tight ends on the team.
You've done your research.
Kind of getting away or getting in the way.
Bowers is like a basil hating.
like, you know, right in the middle.
Okay.
I don't know, maybe.
You're a big whiskey guy.
Well, kind of.
I don't know.
Okay.
And then we got Isaiah likely from the Ravens.
Skip over.
Wait, what did you say?
Basil or basal?
Basil?
Basil?
How do you say it?
Just keep going.
I said basil.
Yeah.
I don't know.
It's a question.
I just, I don't know.
You say it differently at all.
Bring us on home.
Four is too many.
I've just said.
No.
Land it.
Keep going.
Who's the other one?
We're doing this.
Isaiah likely.
The next one up, Ravens,
tight end.
Stuck it behind Mark Andrews.
It's like a wild turkey.
All right.
And then Taysome Hill last.
You could just go from Dalton Kincaid straight to Taysam Hill,
which I would compare it to like a rich and rare.
I've never even heard of that.
Craig, Craig didn't know.
Craig didn't know what a rich and rare was.
Rich and rare?
That sounds like a daytime soap opera.
The way that I would.
describe a rich and rare is that it comes in a plastic bottle.
Nice.
The one time I bought it, the...
How much is it? Can I Google it? The label was...
Well, one of the times I bought it, the label
was, like, just, like, slapped on sideways.
So anyways, that's Taseom Hill.
He's being... He's, like, actually going to be...
I know we say this every year. I recognize that.
He's going to be, like, a running back for the Saints.
Like, in the Red Zone, he's, like, one of their main weapons.
He's going to score, like, 10 touches.
Dennis Allen, the Saints head coach today
was just like, asked about Kendry
Miller again, and he just basically was like,
fuck that guy.
He's, after the Brian Flores thing
came out, where to us said he's like a terrible
person, Dennis Allen's like, hold my beer.
He's like, I race.
He's like, I'm going to sell that shit publicly.
He didn't, like, no one even asked about Kendry Miller.
He's just like, this fucking guy can't stay healthy.
I'm sick of it.
Rich and rare, by the way,
anywhere between $5 to $9.
Any size, five to nine dollars.
It's like a happy meal, but cheaper.
They pay you five to nine dollars and take it.
It's rich and rare.
All right.
Any, uh...
That kind of landed with the rich and rare.
Craig, any other name brand off-prints?
I think off-brand Nico Collins is Christian Watson for the Packers.
Again, much, much cheaper.
To me, that's like when you go to a store and you try and a pair of pants.
And you're like, oh, I like these.
but one leg looks to be longer than the other.
There's like a tailoring issue.
So you take it to the cashier and you show them.
And he's like, all right, we'll give you these 50% off.
Christian Watson's leg is literally,
one leg is heavier than the other leg.
That is literally what Christian Watson is.
And to me, I'm like, these two offenses,
Texans and Packers are probably going to be two of the top five offenses in the league
with two elite quarterbacks,
Jordan Love and C.J. Stroud.
And I'm like, why don't I just go after,
you can still get Nico Collins in the second or third round,
but why don't go after the number one wide receiver
in an ambiguous wide receiving group,
like Green Bay, same with in Houston,
and he has the potential to be
one of the best values in the league.
We forget, two years ago was a rookie.
He had eight touchdowns in four games,
and he was a top five wide receiver
to finish the second half of his year.
And then last year, he had hamstring issues,
and everyone was just like, we're over it.
And I'm like, he's addressed that.
His legs weigh pretty much the same now.
And when he's been on the field,
all of the statistics show that he's the number one guy.
He leads the team in Target share.
His yards per route run is the best.
I just feel like we've all given up on him way too quickly.
And all the receivers in that draft, like fantasy points per game,
it's a little different because all the touchdowns,
but just fantasy points per game for that draft class of their careers,
it's like Christian Watson.
And then it's like Garrett Wilson, who's in the first round of drafts.
Chris Halaave, who's like in the second or third round of drafts,
I'm forgetting a third guy, but also like another first round player, shit.
Waddle?
Yeah, Waddle.
Yeah.
It's just all the guys in that draft are like 50 spots ahead of Christian Wals.
To me, it's just like if you love the Texans' offense,
that's great.
But there's three wide receivers going in the top 65.
And if you love the Packers offense,
there's zero wide receivers going in the top 75.
Doesn't make sense.
Yeah.
I like it.
He's going 101 overall in drafts.
Like, that's nothing.
He's huge and he runs a 4-3.
What else do you want?
I'll keep going.
Nico Collins is competing with Stefan Diggs.
He's one of the best wide receivers in the last five years.
Also Tank Dell, who's like CJ Stroud's best friend.
And then, Nico, Kristen Watson's competing against,
I don't know, a bunch of late.
guys and their second year in the league.
You see Nuka Collins' legs?
They're like identical.
Don't notice a thing.
Twins, Basil.
Twins!
All right.
You guys want to go to the next thing we got here?
Yeah.
Yeah.
So...
This is my favorite part of the show right here.
All right, let's be real.
I think...
So predicting injuries and just dealing with injuries, frankly,
honestly, is the hardest part of this job.
Like, it just...
It's HIPAA and it's like, we're not doctors,
and you're tracking all these people's injuries.
and Aaron Jones sprains his ankle in week nine,
and people are like, do you think he's going to play,
how healthy is?
And I'm like, I don't know.
I don't know if Aaron Jones knows about his ankle.
How should I know, man?
It's the hardest part.
Puka Nakua hurts his knee in the preseason,
and it's like, I don't know.
Googling what a burst of sack is.
I don't know how he's feeling?
It's the hardest part.
But having said, it's also like one of the most important things
there is in fantasy.
It's just like, who's going to get hurt, who's not?
And so...
It's also probably the number one reason why most people
don't draft certain players in drafts.
It's like, uh, Christian Watson, injury prone.
I'm good.
Yeah.
So we were thinking, like, let's just say hypothetically,
we were in like a saw movie-esque contraption.
And the only way to get out was to win a fantasy league
where the only way you got points was the guys who got injured.
Miss games.
And we would never, ever, ever want players to get hurt.
No, we would never.
No, we're not rooting for that.
That would be terrible.
Routing for injuries would be in a horrible taste.
Yeah.
But.
If you were in a league where the most missed games won you the league,
who would you draft?
And you wouldn't die.
And we would get injured if we didn't win the league.
Saw would kill us, yeah.
Yeah.
So we're going to do a little draft
with players who are going to get injured.
We're going to draft players who we truly think
will miss the most games this year.
Don't put it in the newspaper or we're rooting for injuries.
Yeah.
We're not rooting for anyone to get hurt.
Don't make it seem like I said, I killed Batman.
And then on the news that night, it's like,
I kill Batman.
Man.
Don't edit this for your broadcast
and make it seem like I said,
I killed Earl Milford.
So we wanted to just do a quick trivia thing
to kind of like,
quick trivia on deciding who's going to go first here.
This is big.
Do you think there's a clear 101 in this draft?
There's a bit 101.
Yeah.
Okay.
So.
No, but the caveat is you want them to play games.
If they don't play games because they're not good enough to start,
this doesn't count.
You need guys who are starting the game
and then getting injured, which unfortunately.
So is Ken-Dre's out?
Yeah, Kendra's out.
These guys need to be started.
So we have to do a trivia question right now just to figure who goes first.
And I already give me, I know the answer, but I already gave my answer.
So the trivia question is, this might require a whole story in itself.
But so, well, first of just the caveat to this question, we debated doing, we came here and we were like, oh, we should probably make a video over here in Seattle.
And I didn't know about this.
But our, what Austin Gale, who we work with was like, oh, you guys should go down a Pike Place and do the fish throw.
thing.
How do you guys feel about that?
Yeah, do you guys...
Are you pro-fish toss or anti-fish toss?
The look of disgust on D.K.'s face
when we said we wanted to do this.
No, well, first of all, it was more like...
High Fitz was like, have you guys heard about this fish toss thing?
I'm like, how have you not fucking heard about the fish toss?
To be it, never heard about it.
I hadn't heard about it either.
I didn't know about it.
It's on literally every sports program that's ever
happened in Seattle.
They do a fish toss.
Just like before MacClemore?
Do you watch sports?
Dude.
But like I think I think honestly what happened is that like they're watching
money in football and it's like Sealks Bears or something horrendous.
And like the, not you.
Hey, hey.
I'm there doing a nationwide jingle.
And like they do the fish toss.
And I think the answer is it never occurred to me for a moment that they didn't just do
that for NBC.
that that place tosses fish all the time.
Yeah, I probably thought it was like a one-off.
Yeah, I'm like, Mike Tariko was like, throw us a fish.
And they're like, okay.
I'm like, oh, yeah, that place throws fish constantly.
Like, I'm not remembering the two Seattle broadcasts a year.
Hey.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
How much?
Hey.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm just saying that's probably the average amount.
But, so anyway.
It's like, if we did a show in London and Hyphitz was like,
who's this?
Big Ben guy.
We go to New York.
Who's that lady statue?
Yo, but it's like...
It's like somebody being like,
Temecula is the same as Italy, right?
So anyway...
Buga to Beppo, you're good.
If we... D.K. literally said,
if you guys do that, I will not come.
That was...
Which I respect, because it's kind of like Times Square, New York,
which I just, I would never.
It's like Hollywood Boulevard.
Yeah, it's disgusting. Anyway...
Let's go take our picture next to the Hollywood star.
Yeah.
So the trivia question, people
travel from all over to see the famous
Pike Place fish throwers play their
slippery game of catch.
Flowering.
I copy and paste it from National
Geographic. I copy and paste it from National Geographic.
But it says actually
with accompanying hollers, which
all right, whatever. Anyway,
up to how many times a day
did they throw the fish?
I guess 50.
Up to? How many times a day? So it's like not the most they've ever
done, but generally speaking, up to how many times a day?
Okay, wait, we got to answer at the same time.
I said 15. I know the answer to that. You shouldn't have told us that.
Oh, well, sorry. Well, now we're anchored to that.
Everyone would have said I was fucking cheating.
Okay, I have a number.
Yeah. Ready?
One, two, three.
35. 45. All right, 35, 35.
Did you both say 35?
I said 45.
The answer is 200.
What the fuck?
That's a lot.
That's a lot of.
Are there more, is there more than one area where you can do it, or is
Is it single file line?
Is there one fish throwing lane?
I don't know.
He's the one who says he's over it.
Or is it kind of like chaos?
So they do have decoy fish.
Apparently they let you throw the bad fish, which makes sense.
They like...
I thought you throw the fish you buy.
I think they let you throw a fish, not the one you, but which makes more sense.
Okay.
You'll buy a fish.
Can you enlighten us?
How does this work?
What?
There's a designated throwing fish.
Is that right?
I don't know.
There's just one dead fish.
They toss back and forward all the way?
Designated survivor.
It's like the fish is turned.
use this one to throw.
Yeah, anyway.
How much, do you have to buy the whole fish?
We thought about doing it and we're like, this is going to be a lot of money.
You didn't, you never considered it.
Anyway, so.
So you have first picked.
I was going to stand way away.
This is actually the exact order, which is very convenient.
But like, yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
So we're going to, and we're going to get one quarterback, one running back, one receiver, one 10.
You can go in any order you want.
You can go after any position you want.
Guy you think we'll miss the most games.
I mean, the one-on-one is Deonté Johnson.
Oh.
Oh, that's good.
He's always hurt.
He's always rolling around.
He's hurt multiple times a game.
I feel like that should be...
He's milking it.
A bonus.
But he doesn't really miss games.
He just leaves games.
He misses games.
That's worse.
At least when you miss a game, I can replace you.
All right.
He was low on my list, so embarrassing for you.
Damn it.
Fuck off.
I'm taken at the running back position, I'm going Kiron Williams.
Wow.
Why?
Is it because of the foot ankle, foot ankle,
injuries?
Yeah, foot ankle, foot ankle.
He's missed 12 games.
in two seasons.
He's only been here for two years.
He's missed 12 games.
He's like 5-9 under 200 pounds,
and they drafted another running back
because he always gets hurt.
Yeah, Kairns, I,
that's honestly the sneaky thing.
It's not to play quorum stuff,
it's the injuries.
That's a solid pick.
Yeah.
Did he play all last year, though?
How many games did he miss?
I think five?
Like a month.
I'm,
I think I'm going to take Marquis Brown
who literally played one snap
in the preseason and broke his shoulder.
It's kind of cheating
I'm not thinking to get the guy who's already hurt, but I respect it.
A clavicular.
I do stand by that, the more complicated it is to pronounce the word that the heart, the worst
the injury is.
Yeah.
First snap.
The clivoc.
Oh, wait, I go twice now, I guess.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, we're not going to snake.
All right.
All right.
Okay.
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah.
I'll take Rahim Mostert, aka Lisa Bonette.
Bonnet?
Bonnet.
Bonay.
How dare you?
I'll take Lisa Lisa Bonnet.
Okay.
Basil Hayden.
Basil Hadesel.
Basel Hayden.
All right.
So you have your wide receiver and your running back.
Hollywood Brown and Rooms.
All right.
So I have Kai Wren Williams.
Khyrin Williams.
I'm going to go with Anthony Richardson.
Yeah.
You got to.
Why?
Because he played 10 quarters last year.
Look, we would never root for injuries.
Yeah, no.
We're not rooting for it.
I'm trying to save my life here, all right?
Yeah, he'd have to go with Richardson.
Yep.
I mean, he played in five games and was injured four times.
Yeah, he's like treats his body like a battering ram.
That is the real reason it's worth going to Temecula.
Is it's like maybe just get.
Jade and Daniels. You got to get off Temecula. It's worse
in Italy. Yeah. It's not better
than Italy. Have you
been to Temecula? Yeah,
it was great.
Have you been to Italy? Yeah.
And you think they're similar?
Yeah. They look really similar.
Okay. All right. All right. All right. All right.
Google it, man.
I wonder how many people in... D.K., you double-tapper.
I got the top two guys on my big board, so
are you guys shaking in your boots right now?
This is tough. Let's see.
I got to go with, I mean, I hate to do this,
but I got to go with Lamar Jackson.
Fuck.
Oh, yeah.
And he's not even going to get hurt.
He's just going to get sick.
He's just going to have to take a shit.
Just going to get the runs.
Which is kind of like the best of both worlds.
He's not hurt.
He's just got the,
he has the constitution of a five-year-old.
Yeah.
You know what's crazy?
As Lamar said the other day,
he said he never got sick in college
just as an adult.
I'm like, that's wild to me.
It's like when a little kid goes to daycare.
Yeah.
He's in a locker room.
There's all kinds of,
they're playing together and there's all kinds of
germs. He's the incontent spaniel.
Doesn't know how to bark.
Asha.
I'm surprised you took him over Jaden Daniels.
Oh yeah, that was a good.
Jaden Daniels kind of runs like
where she rice drives.
Too soon?
Too soon?
Really fucking fast?
No regard for people around him.
Oh, that's, yeah.
Yeah.
Really fucking fast.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right,
DK, you're on the clock.
Oh, I'm again?
Yeah.
Jake Dobbins.
Yeah.
I mean, it's...
Sorry.
Geez.
He tore his ACL and his Achilles.
Yeah.
The Clay Thompson.
Yeah, that's tough.
That's a good one.
But I didn't say that.
No one tagged JK Dobbins.
Yeah, because he'll come after you.
He will.
Yeah.
All right.
I feel like the tight ends.
I'm going to block.
him.
There's not many tight ends on this list.
I don't have that big of a deal.
I feel like it's all running backs,
wide receivers,
and quarterbacks.
All right,
so I need a wide receiver in a tight end.
Cadarius just won't.
He's not starting it.
He's not playing in enough games.
It doesn't count.
I got to get somebody who's going to be on the field.
Dude,
Jerry Judy.
I'm taking Jerry Judy.
Jerry Judy's,
oh yeah,
that's good.
Goes down like a sack of thornobes every two weeks.
That guy sprained his ankle getting out of bed.
Jerry Judy is the reason we invented the,
well,
if, like, if the injury looks bad,
he's fine.
Yeah.
And if the injury looks fine, it's really bad.
Like, that's like a pretty good rule of thumb.
Yeah, yeah, that's also Deontay.
But, dude, Jerry Judy's had like seven injuries
in the first four years of his career.
Did you hear that Cadarius, Tony,
in the first preseason game, got two penalties
before, like, the game even started?
Yeah.
He's trying something out.
He's experimenting.
I'm pretty sure that he got, like, two penalties,
and then they're like, okay.
On the same play on the sideline.
The announcers are like,
oh, there's two flags.
That's so weird.
One's on Tony, and then there's, like,
I can applaud, like, I think both are on Tony.
Is it my turn again?
No, it's high fits.
He's got two.
So you have who?
You have Moser in Hollywood Brown?
Oh, and I'm going to take Jaden Daniels.
Yeah, that's right.
I can't believe that just happened.
That's right.
Wow.
Okay.
Anytime you have a rookie quarterback come in,
who has like a highlight reel of all the times,
he just got like the shit kicked out of him.
Like running?
It's maybe a bad side.
Do you guys, are there any bars here who play like Pluto TV
with just like the montage?
of people like skateboarding and just falling and stuff.
Oh, no, we're thinking of chive TV.
Chive.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's just the chive,
Chive TV, yeah.
What's with that?
Don't know.
And then like,
it's just like,
I actually don't think anybody knows who runs that company.
Dude,
I think Rob Deerdeck runs that company.
It's like a ghost ship.
It's just still going.
It's just ridiculousness for 24 hours.
But it's like,
Jadenynolds would fit right onto Chive TV.
Like, it's just like,
oh, he tried to jump over a guy.
who wasn't going low.
It's like, okay, I don't know what you do.
It's like you hit the wrong button playing maddened.
Like he like, you go for a fullback dive and hit the jump button.
He just gets it stick.
Anyway, yeah, I'll take J.N.
I mean, George Kittle, who lost 30 pounds this offseason surgery.
Oh, yeah.
And then added 30 pounds, snip, snap.
And I'm kind of like, I don't know.
That's going to get.
Yeah, I don't know if his, like, frame can handle that kind of change.
Yeah.
That's good.
That's really good.
For tight end, I'll probably go with Mark Andrew.
Andrews.
I'm glad I didn't have to say it.
I mean, he fractured his leg last year.
He was in a car crash this week.
Yeah, he's fine, though.
But yeah.
That was weird because John Harbaugh literally used the freight.
John Harbaugh, so Mark Hange is driving to the Ravens facility, and he was in a car crash.
And he was apparently pretty serious, but he was fine.
And John Harba literally used the phrase.
He walked away without a scratch.
And then, like, he went to the team meetings.
He was like, oh, Mark Andrews is fine.
And then he hasn't practiced since.
And I'm like, what a weird phrase to use.
Like, not a scratch.
And then he's on the injury report?
Like, makes me feel worse?
Just me, okay, all right.
The Harbaugh's lie a lot about...
They're super weird about injuries.
What does Jim Harbaugh say about injuries?
He says, like, they're not doing well right now.
He says, like, some ambiguous catch-all phrase.
Andy Reads is, we'll see.
He's in a tough spot.
Yeah.
He's like, Andy Reid says, we'll see.
That guy's, like, cooked.
We'll see.
So you're at, you have a time to closing.
I can't choose Hawkinson, right?
Because he's already hurt.
Correct.
Well, you can, but if he misses the first eight games of the season, you don't get any of those.
Oh, right.
What rules are these?
Because then you would just pick a guy who's out for the whole year.
So specific.
I'll be like first pick the guy who retired.
How is that fun?
All take guys who just tore their ACLs.
It's like not that great of content.
No.
You need to pick guys who are going to play that worry you when you draft them.
I mean, Greg Dulcich, who hasn't.
Oh.
He hasn't, his hamstrings are fucked up.
Spaghetti hamstrings.
He's another guy.
I think they did the last.
leg measurement thing, the leg weight,
which is now becoming insanely popular.
We should measure our legs as a bit.
We should measure our legs.
We should do that. We should figure that out.
We got to measure our legs.
Anybody has a medical practice in Seattle and wants to help us with that.
We will talk.
We have any scientists who have figured out.
Anyone want to give us free MRIs?
Yeah, we kept getting emails about like, well,
our comedies figured this out like 2,000 years ago.
And I'm like, I don't know.
But yeah, we should measure our legs.
Okay, so I do think from all that, though,
I'm a little nervous about a lot of these people getting hurt.
Yeah, man, it's actually the hardest part of fantasy.
So we'll have to keep track and root for all these guys to get hurt.
So.
Or sick.
None of us picked Devon H.N.
Yeah.
What a leap of faith we're all taking.
185 pounds, what could go wrong?
Also not mentioned Pooka Nukua.
Oh, yeah.
Deshawn Watson, whose shoulder doesn't work.
Or cup.
Cooper Cup, Mike Williams.
Burrow.
James Connor, Aaron Jones.
Yeah.
Tony Pollard.
Mike Williams.
Yeah.
Tajey Spears has got like no...
He doesn't even have an ACL.
Yeah.
Can't tear it if you don't have it.
Football is back and there's no better place to get in on the NFL action.
Then Fandle America's number one sports book because right now all customers can bet
$5 and get a three-week free trial of NFL Sunday ticket from YouTube and YouTube TV.
Then you'll be able to watch every regular season Sunday afternoon out of March.
market game, my favorite bets for this season.
As I've mentioned, you could do the Giants to win the Super Bowl.
It's like 150 to 1.
Just throwing it out there.
You never know.
Or you can just bet the Giants under, which I guess will probably win is the Giants won't win
that many games.
But you never know.
So 150 to 1 for the Giants to win the Super Bowl.
Also, not to be Debbie Downer.
Bengals to miss the playoffs.
Still like two to one odds.
Just throwing it out there.
Plus, with Fandle, you don't even have to leave the app to access real-time stats and
data to help you make even more winning bets.
Just visit fandle.
slash ringer fantasy to download America's number one sports book.
Must be 21 plus, 18 plus in D.C. and present and select states.
Offer ends September 22nd, 2024, after three-week free trial, the full price of NFL Sunday
ticket will be automatically charged seasonally.
Cancel any time.
No refunds, terms, restrictions, and embargoes apply.
YouTube TV base plan required to watch YouTube TV.
Redemption requires a Google account and current form of payment.
Gambling problem.
Call 1-800 gambler or visit RG-help.
There were a couple other, I think just general Seattle things we had to hit just from being here for a couple days.
The first of all, like, D.K., do you want to, should we have D.K. give us a theory of how you can tell everything you need to know about a person from boarding a plane or.
Oh, yeah.
This is something I came up with.
I don't even know, remember when, but like basically my thesis is you can basically tell everything about a person by the way they board an airplane.
So, like, are they.
It's so good.
Are they, like, one of those people that lines up 30 minutes before,
they're even starting the boarding,
is just like to mill about.
They're trying to sneak into the group ahead of them.
Do they have, like, yeah, exactly.
That's Hyphitz is like, yeah.
He's like, I'm going to get in the end of the group before me.
And then if they check, I'll just be like, whoa, that's next.
Yeah.
They only check, they check for a group, like, you know,
it's like they let the soldiers and people with elderly and the people with children go.
And I don't, I don't do that.
Hyphitz is in uniform.
Yeah. Stolen valor.
But I'm like, those people go, and then there are the people who paid a lot of money.
Tolent Valor.
Yeah.
Stolen Valor.
The Stolen Valor method.
Purple Hearts.
In a nutshell, stolen valor.
But like, those people go, and then it's group one and two who paid a lot of money.
And they don't give a fuck after those people.
Like, once the people paid money, three, four, five, it's all the same.
Anyway, and then there's, once you get on the plane, there's a whole other subset of people.
Like, you know, you got the neck roll.
They're holding their cell phone and their laptop.
Got the giant headphones on, can't hear anything.
They're not paying attention to anything.
You know, they take their bag all the way back
and there's no room for a bag,
so then they got to, like, go back to the front.
It's just pure chaos.
Yeah.
Anyways, I was on a plane.
Can you switch with me?
I get claustrophobic.
I have to pee a lot.
Hold my dog.
Yeah.
That, yeah.
Fuck.
Anyway, I found another one.
I figured out another one that was like,
maybe the, like, the biggest one
that I've ever seen is
when you get on an airplane
with a full box
of pizza.
So specific.
I've seen this like multiple times.
Apparently there's pizzerias in airports.
Yeah, of course.
You just get a whole pizza and bring it on a plane.
If the food is bigger than your seat,
you shouldn't be able to bring it on the plane.
Like if you can barely open the box of pizza,
you shouldn't be carrying.
That's not a carry-on.
Yeah.
How do they allow that?
I thought you only allowed one bag,
like one extra bag.
So in your mind, what is the perfect way
to board a plane?
Oh, there's no,
There's no such thing as perfect.
Okay.
Sure.
Always ways to improve.
I don't know.
Put things in your pocket.
Put something in your pocket.
Okay.
Or your bag.
So do you think somebody should walk in, no headphones on, aware of the surroundings,
listening to anything, willing to help others?
What's, you know, is that what you do?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You don't have headphones on when you board a plane?
Well, I might wear headphones.
You fucking liar.
Yeah.
Just raw dogging, boarding the plane?
No way.
Just stare at here at that.
I basically had to raw dog my flight here.
No Wi-Fi.
What a shame.
It's 2024.
Set a new record.
Two and a half hours.
I did fly Alaska.
It was supposed to be free Wi-Fi.
Didn't work.
Tried to pay for it.
Didn't work.
By the way, we love Alaska.
We love Boeing.
Love Boeing.
Let the record state.
We love Boeing.
Boeing is good.
Love Boas.
Is anyone your work for Boeing?
No qualms with anything they're up to.
Oh, it's out to me.
Boeing.
I feel, yeah.
Feel sick.
I personally don't care about doors on planes.
Could take him or leave them.
Plug them, don't plug them, whatever.
Yeah.
I don't need to text my loved ones on a flight.
Don't care.
Wait, where were we going with this?
I forgot.
Hyva's wanted to hear your new plane carry.
I don't know what it means if you carry a whole pizza on, but it's not good.
On the way to L.A. three weeks ago, did you see somebody?
Someone got on with a whole fucking pizza.
I was just like, you've got to be kidding me.
They can't let a guy on with a whole pizza.
Yeah.
Was he with a family?
Was he feeding himself?
Okay.
Okay, that is weird, yeah.
The audacity.
I don't know.
I didn't check in.
But I assumed so.
I didn't see him get off with the box of pizza.
All right.
TK., did you want to talk about some of your old haunts or gone?
Oh, yeah.
So I actually moved away from Seattle.
I think the last time I lived here was like 2017, 2016.
And all the bars I used to go to are like,
gone or burned down.
And or, so Dantes, anybody?
RIP, can we pour some out for Dantes?
I mean, let's be honest.
If you would have asked me,
what would be the end of Dantes?
Burning down probably would be like a logical.
That's the coolest way for a bar to go.
Burned down.
Burn it.
I bet there was a lot of firefighters making that joke that night.
And then Eastlake Bar and Grill.
Burned down.
Another one burned down.
That burned down too?
It also burned down.
Damn.
Isn't it rain all the time here?
I was literally thinking it.
Hold on.
Let me pull this up.
Okay, so the other ones that I used to go to, Belltown Billiards.
Closed?
Gone.
Gone.
Gone.
Red Door.
Gone.
Dad Watson.
It's like more of like a brewery.
Gone.
And then the other, like some of my other favorites, Norms.
the ballroom in Fremont, which we went to.
And then my all-time favorite, A. Pizza Mart, which is the greatest, the greatest restaurant
name of all time.
Remember when A's Pizza Mart?
Phone books existed.
A pizza mart.
So, or I guess it could have been a pizza mart.
I don't know.
Oh, I assumed A was like a proper, proper noun for like a guy's name or something.
A pizza mart.
Just a pizza mart.
There's three others?
Nice.
Okay.
New location.
We'll check them out.
All right.
You guys,
you guys ready for some emails?
Thank you all for writing in.
Thank you very much.
Shout out of everyone to wrote a minute.
We've got a lot of great emails.
It was hard to choose from.
And also, just so you guys know,
we're going to be doing, after the show,
we're going to be doing a little meat and grieve.
You guys line up in the back left over there.
There's like a banner or something.
I think we got back there.
So just line up.
Look at banner, Michael.
What'd you say?
Nothing.
No, actually, I didn't know any.
Look at Banner as a quote.
Look at Bannon?
Banner.
Come on, man.
Is that from the Batman movie?
Family love Michael.
Nothing?
Okay.
All right.
All right, this one's from Logan.
Logan.
Log.
Would you rather get a dime-sized tattoo of your choosing on your face
or a tattoo of your two co-hosts on your entire back?
Oh, the Affleck.
The Affleck.
The giant Phoenix
The Stevo
The Batman
I'd rather get you two on my back
Yeah
Me too
Yeah
The dime is a lot of face
I would put you in a Mike Davis
jersey
Yeah
On my back
I would put
I don't know
Oh yeah
What would it mine be
Caderius Tony probably
That'd be cool
You'd be just hugging
At the Super Bowl
When Cadarius Tony
Almost scored a touchdown
Yeah
A second touchdown
Truly one of my favorite
memories
Yeah
That punt return
You and I were like
Yeah
It's like you, me, and Kadaria sonny's parents.
I hate that guy.
This email's from Paul.
Paul.
Paulie.
High Fitz, will you please pronounce the names of these Washington?
Oh, yes.
First of all, these are fucking made up.
This is, all right.
Wait, is this two truths and a liar?
Are these all real?
No, they're all real.
Okay.
P-U-Y-A-L-L-U-P.
Do not spoil it.
Don't spoil it.
Yeah, don't spoil it.
Don't spoil it.
Pull y'all up?
What the fuck?
It's actually like not as far off as I thought.
Nice.
What is it?
Puyallup.
What?
Puyallup.
Puyallup.
Puyallup.
Oh, wait.
I still couldn't do it.
All right.
I literally kind of live there.
The next one here, we have S-E-Q-U-I-M.
Requiem.
This one's that.
Squam.
Get the fuck out.
Squam.
S-E-Q?
Why is it S-E-Q?
Q, squim, like,
I didn't name it, I don't know.
Silent E.
One of those classic silent E's.
Silent E, the second letter of the fucking word.
Next time we got,
N-C-H-E-S.
Oh, that's hard.
Oh, man, this is.
I don't even know this one.
Is it like nachos, but with any
notches, notches?
Natchis.
Notches.
Natchez?
Natchee.
Not cheese?
Cheese. I didn't know that.
Wow.
That's cool.
All right.
Next one we got T-O-P-P-E-N-I-S-H.
Topin-ish.
Oh, you don't even know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
H-O-Q-U-I-A-M.
Hock-E-A-M.
Hoquium.
Hoquium.
Yeah.
Not hard to pronounce, but funny.
Hump tulips?
What the fuck is that?
That's a real place?
I think that's just, yeah.
Is that where the old German town that like a Cobra fest?
No, it's D-D-N-H-H-H-Haland?
Or it's Holland?
They loved tulips over that.
Holland.
All right.
This is like a...
That one guy loved that joke.
At least someone knew where I was going with that.
They love to hump the tulips.
We got, uh, okay, we have one here.
That's, okay, this is from...
Not Dave.
It's from, Gino?
Gino.
Smith?
Gene.
Not Dave, Gino?
And Gene, no, just trust me.
What?
Gene wrote, is it okay?
to be a fan of an out-of-state team
when your state has a team.
P.S. Fuck you, Dave.
And then Dave wrote, Dave.
Dave, right. Dave writes,
is it okay to be a fan of an out-of-state team
if you were born in the state
and your state has teams? This is an
argument I have with my friend, P.S.
Fuck you, Gene.
So, I guess,
can you root for a team outside of your state?
Dave says, I, Dave,
basically, it sounds like Dave's a Bucks fan,
a Tampa.
Bay Bucks fan.
Oh, he's...
Gene's the Bucks fan.
Oh, he's wearing the gear.
Very important.
First of all, is Tampa not literally as far
as you could possibly get from the state?
This is 4,000 miles away.
Yeah, yeah, it's close.
Gene, did you have, like, a family member?
But you're from Seattle?
Oh, that's good.
That's cool.
I don't like that. I respect that.
I mean, it's like America.
You just like spun a globe?
Yes.
Do you remember when the Seahawks played the Bucks in Germany
and we all realized live on air that Seattle,
Tampa is closer to Germany.
Seattle's closer to Germany than Tampa Bay, yeah.
Because of the earth being circle?
Allegedly.
Sphere.
Whatever.
You know, because of the earth being a circle.
Allegedly.
Time is a flat sphere.
Obama at the DNC and his speech yesterday said all four corners of the earth.
And I was like,
what's he been watching?
He does not.
actually he has the documents what does he know he gets to see that shit uh this is Sean
Seanie what old school NFL player name should I tell my wife I want to add to our baby
name list oh yeah cloice close he's boy I I googled funny NFL names after I saw this by the way
Bob Margarita there's a guy named Bob Margarita sloppy sloppy firstin
Sloppy.
Sloppy.
Sloply,
We all know about it.
Do you remember Whizor White?
We talked about him.
Wizard, that's actually cool.
There's also a guy named Buzz Nutter.
Buzz Nutter.
I'll take the first half.
What happened to name?
Decaprio Boodle.
Decaprio?
He got drafted like a couple years ago.
This is like a new guy.
Decaprio, what was his last name?
Boodle.
Decaprio Boodle.
One name.
All right.
He'd probably switch it.
Bootle Decaprio.
This is from Mikey.
Mikey.
Craig, can you say anything other than Blue Stone
in the Australian accent?
Not really, not really.
Give him the same.
Blue Stone?
No.
I just need something with like that exactly.
As long as it exactly rhymes a stone, I could nail it.
Other than that, it's kind of tough.
Game of Thrones.
Thrones?
I have to think about the Australian accent,
and then I can kind of do it,
but you can't just like do it off the cuff.
That's tough.
It's a tough one.
In the house?
Okay.
No.
They would have all booed me if they heard me do Stone.
Yeah.
All right.
This is from Michaela and Sean.
McHale and Sean.
My boyfriend dragged me here.
So my question for you guys is,
fuck Mary Kill.
And she said we could,
I'm going to combine this with someone else's
a fucking Mary Kill.
A cuisine based fuck Mary Kill,
but somebody else sent us a cuisine based.
I'm already nervous.
Fuck Mary Kill, French toast,
waffles, and pancakes.
Easy.
Easy.
I think this is easy too.
I'm shooting waffle right in the dumb.
Yeah.
And then, I mean, look, I like waffles.
I like waffles, but if I had to pick.
And then, and then.
And then.
I'm with you, Craig.
No, you guys are fucking.
Look, I have to kill one of them.
They're all very good.
Respect so you guys are idiot.
Wait.
You, yo, you fuck pancakes.
I fuck all due respect.
Fuck you.
With all due respect.
Pancakes are the epitome of like a one-night
understand because like you can't finish a plate of pancakes.
It's like the Mitch Edward joke.
It's like.
So you're fucking pancakes.
I'm fucking pancakes because it's like you know how to,
eventually you love pancakes.
You all go to the beginning and then you're fucking sick of them.
Yeah.
That's just the,
logistically speaking,
it makes sense too.
Imagine being stuck with pancakes your whole life.
You'd be miserable.
I don't know if it's because like places serve more pancakes more than the other two,
but I feel like I crave pancakes more.
Maybe I've been programmed to do that.
But I feel like when I'm hung over,
I'm going to a diner.
I'm like,
I want pancakes.
Wait, but do I really want to marry French toast?
No, it's too sweet.
It's too decadent.
I would rather marry pancakes, fuck French toast.
Merry waffles.
Shrek, we're making waffles.
A bad waffle is dry as shit.
We have a good waffle.
You marry a good waffle.
So it's the best version of each one?
That's hard.
That changes things.
You're from L.A.
What do you fucking know?
What kind of syrup they got in L.A.
Do you ever think like there's too much syrup involved with waffles?
Like the syrup like in the holes?
You think they should be,
waffles should be flat and have no.
pockets.
The Mitch
Headberg, it's like their little syrup traps.
This is what it's like when people
are listening to our podcasts, they're just screaming
in the way. No!
Apparently, I've heard four people say that's what
they're for with the waffles.
Fuck the French. Freedom fries.
People who are intolerant of other people's culture
and the Dutch.
And the French.
All right.
American toast.
This is from Thomas.
Tommy.
Which NFL player or coach?
would look better with the Joe Borough haircut.
I got to admit, as it's starting to grow on Joe,
it looks kind of nice now.
It looked like a midlife crisis before, but I'm not alike.
Mike McDaniel, I would have threw it him out,
but you see the memes where it's like he went from looking like a Best Buy,
like assistant manager until now, like, two years in Miami,
it looks like a Coke dealer.
Yeah.
I'm like, he's two years away from the borough.
Yeah, he dresses like Frato and from the Godfather now.
He does.
Who else would look good with the blonde?
Tomlin's not a
coach anymore.
Mike Toma could do it.
With the dark beer?
Yeah, Toma could do it.
That would work.
What about Jim Harbaugh?
Jim or John?
Maybe both.
Harbaugh?
Harbaugh?
Harbaugh, I believe anything.
All right.
I'd be horrible.
Mike McCarthy.
Mike McCarthy would be unbelievable.
What are you going here?
Going for here, Mike.
Just getting to Cloy's box.
No plum.
With a burrow.
All right, this is my favorite email
that we got all night.
All your other ones were good, too, don't worry.
Someone just put their email.
I think they were going around asking for emails
and shout out to, I'm not going to read your whole one,
but Corey T2, blank, blank, blank at yahoo.
We respect you, we acknowledge you.
Actually just put down your email?
Yeah.
That's all right.
That's all right.
I panic.
I'll email you tonight.
Yeah, that's the best one.
You're on the special mailing order now.
Unbelievable.
Pen pals.
Should Steve Baum
should Steve Bomber
have put a gentleman's piss club
inside the new LA Clippers Arena?
I mean, he
kind of did.
There's like more bathrooms
in the new stadium
than any stadium in America.
Well,
are they selling stuff to you in the bathroom?
Because that's like a good news.
No, they got to get TVs in there.
They need to bring the TVs out
to the seats.
In the journals.
You don't have to get up.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's smart.
That's right.
That's right.
Holy shit.
He just explained it better
than I've ever understood.
I still can't get over that double a baseball game
that had the toilets in the stands.
I know.
They didn't work, though.
No.
Do you think somebody tried?
It's like the only thing you need from a toilet
is that has to work.
Yeah.
It's like essential.
Yeah.
It's probably...
Priority number one
with a toilet for them to work.
Remember that guy who emailed us
who said that his boss had a private bathroom
and then everyone was off but him,
so he took a shit in it,
and then it wasn't plugged in.
There was no water.
and then he spent three hours cleaning the toilet.
Jesus.
Sorry, I guess that was kind of graphic.
All right.
I love podcast that go.
Remember the time that guy emailed us?
Sorry.
Anyway.
All right, this was from Tim and Andrews.
It was like the Chris Farley.
Do you remember when you were on the Beatles?
Yeah.
That was awesome.
Did you remember when?
This was from Tim and Andrew.
Tim and Andrew.
Tim and Andrew.
Tim and Andrew.
You guys have done Oreos, but have you heard of all the Kit Kat
flavors.
Oh, yeah, they have some weird ones.
They got normal ones, but they also have soy sauce.
Kola and lemon squash?
Wait, what was that?
Soy sauce and then what?
Soy sauce.
Cola and lemon squash?
And they have potato.
That's all one?
Potato.
Cola and lemon and also squash.
Potato KitKet.
Or is it saying like that's a plan.
Wait, it's on the card.
Cola and lemon squash is one.
Is it where?
I don't get the.
squash part.
Are they squashed together, the cola and the lemon?
I don't know.
Or is squash involved?
Was there a comma between cola and lemon squash?
He didn't write a comma.
Okay.
That's crazy.
Potato?
Potato.
Potato is the best one.
They got macha kick cats.
There's like potatoes don't even really taste like anything.
Potato.
Imagine eating a Kit Kat.
Be like, potato.
Just like potato.
This is what I wanted.
I think this will have to be next.
We'll have to try this.
Oh, my God.
Kai, where are you?
We're going to get you a potato kit cat.
Kai would do that.
I'm down.
Oh, he has a mic.
Yeah, what's up?
Whoa.
Hey, Kai.
You know, Kai explored some foods this week in Seattle, a little bit.
He had some onions on his sandwich.
That was really good.
No lettuce.
No lettuce.
You guys have to see the receipt that we got.
Oh, I'll tweet it out.
He went to Mendocino Farms.
And Kai got a steak sandwich, and it just said the receipt was just like, no cheese, no onions.
No thing.
And it was like, I've never seen so many, like, removals.
We went to Un Bien to get a sandwich, which was fucking great.
So good.
Actually, it was Paseo.
Oh, it wasn't Umbien?
Same.
Same.
Well, we went to Paseo.
Pseo was very good.
Anyway, Kai, his sweet soul, just kind of got meat, meat and bread.
I got onions.
He did get onions.
He devoured it.
Oh, my God.
All right.
Well.
Honestly, thank you guys so much for coming out tonight.
This was an unbelievable amount of fun,
and we've done four of these live shows,
one in the draft,
but the other three have all been like where we're from.
We did one in D.C. with me, one in L.A.
I'd be lying of it and say I feel like I was most excited,
honestly, for like this one here
because we knew it would be like an incredible group of people
with all you guys here.
So, thank you so much from the bottom of our heart.
Like this was so amazing.
Thank you very much. Thank you.
And again, shout out to everyone here.
Works at the Crocodile.
We had a long argument, Craig and I about this crocodile up here.
It wasn't that long.
Not an argument.
Thank you to everyone.
Miscommunication.
Thank you to everyone.
Works for the Crocodile.
Thank you to Nationwide.
Yeah.
Nationwide is on your side.
Do they still, is that still the jingle?
Well, I hope.
Yeah.
If not, we'll have to send this back.
Yeah.
Thank you.
And again, thank you.
Elizabeth Fehrman.
Thank you, Hannah.
Thank you.
Just thank you every, like Kira, Jack.
Thank you.
Everybody takes so many people to put this on.
And of course, Kai.
He knows.
We fed him.
I don't know.
But most of all,
thank you Lord.
Lord.
Lord.
Thank you, Nirvana.
Yeah.
We're going to throw fish.
We got to fucking say Nirvana.
Nirvana and Pearl Jim
played just opening acts for the ringer
fantasy football show, basically.
Yeah.
Played here, right?
Is that right?
They both played here?
I think this is a new location.
Yeah, I think they'll...
Well, new location.
Yeah, okay.
Did they play?
Did they both play?
Yeah.
I don't know.
Did you just make that up?
No, no, really.
I mean, at the old location, they played.
Nice.
And now it's us.
What's your relationship with Nirvana?
I mean, we were born in 95.
No problems with them?
I listened to them growing up a little bit, enjoy their work.
I don't know.
I respect that they're making it.
They make music, and I respect that they're doing that.
Sting.
Sting, hear of mine.
Oh, God, I don't know.
You know who I used to like a lot in high school?
Craig brought this up.
I used to love Blue Scholars.
I listened them all the time.
time growing up. They were dope. Super good.
Yeah. Modest mouse.
They're up there. Oh.
I mean, they're like Issaquah or something, but yeah.
Same same.
Death Cab, that's a good one.
Yeah, yeah, Bellingham.
Odessa from Bellingham? You name it Seattle.
With Death Cat? Oh, one of the last things
we did in the ringer before the pandemic was we made a video with Death Cab for Cutie.
That was there. Oh, yeah. We did a live show in the office.
That was really cool. It was one of the last things we did.
Yeah.
You're saying me, but I was not.
not there. Well, I was
Royal Week. Right. Yeah.
Dang, that was fun. Oh, yeah, Alice and Chains.
Another one. Okay. Let's keep going. How many? We'll just keep doing this.
Keep it going. Keep it going. Macomar.
Yeah. Yeah. Soundgarden.
Yeah. Oh, yeah. SoundGard.
Yeah.
Oh, yes, or mix a lot. Yeah.
Tacoma.
Do you guys think somebody else should name the band?
D.K.'s getting tired of it, he told us.
You think it should be...
People are sick of me. Yeah.
Because he said the Beatles like five times at this point.
That was brutal.
We're like, all right.
Just fucking mailing it in now.
He's like, I don't know, man, Eminem again.
I feel like I have to ask because, like, we joked about the fish thing, but I have to
do you guys like like like MacLamore or what?
What's the, is it like, is it like, he's your friend that you have to defend?
And it's like, because he's your guy.
But it's your friend who gets in the fights at the bars and you're like, shit, I get, you know.
Yeah.
He's fine.
He's fine.
The best answer.
He seems so happy.
You know what?
And he reps Seattle's so hard, too.
It's so funny that everyone's like, we're good.
He's like, I love this city.
You guys are the best.
He's like, man.
C-Tor!
He's like, yeah, we're all right.
All right.
Oh, fame.
Wow.
Look at what it'll do.
He probably didn't have that haircut, did he, when he was younger?
Give him the borough.
Yeah.
Here we go.
Yeah.
Goodbye, everyone.
Thank you, everybody.
Thank you so much.
Must be 21 plus and present in select states for Kansas
and affiliation.
with Kansas Star Casino or 18 plus and present in D.C. Gambling problem. Call 1-800 gambler or visit
RG-RG-Helpshelp.com. Call 1-88-88-8-9-7777 or visit ccpg.gatig.org and
Maryland. Hope is here. Visit gambling helpline, MA.org or call 800-327-50-50-50 for 24-7
support in Massachusetts or call 18778-Hope-N-N-Y or text Hope N.N.Y in New York.
