The Ringer NFL Show - Week 13 Winners and Losers, and Joe Burrow Needs a Nickname

Episode Date: December 5, 2022

We recap Week 13 by giving out awards for the biggest winners and losers of the weekend, including big days for all the star players who were traded in the offseason, Tua’s struggle in San Francisco, the defensive fantasy explosions in Cleveland and Dallas, the rookie WR boom, and stat lines we are ignoring. We end by inducting our next player into the 2022 Fantasy Burn Book. Check out our Weekly Fantasy Football Rankings for positional rankings and more! Email us! [e-mail] Hosts: Danny Heifetz, Danny Kelly, and Craig Horlbeck Producers: Craig Horlbeck and Kai Grady Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The time has come to get ready for the 2022 World Cup. And what better way to prepare than by revisiting the World Cup's most amazing goals? I'm Brian Phillips. I'm making a podcast about the history of the men's World Cup told through the stories of 22 iconic goals. The show's called 22 Goals. It's out now on the Ringer Podcast Network, and we're having so much fun. Welcome to the Ringer Fantasy Football Show. My name is Danny Hyfitz.

I am joined by Danny Kelly and Craig Horlebeck. Sunday of Week 13 is over. It's time to give out some awards. We're going to go based on vibes. The Sunday Night Football game just ended. The Cowboys won 54-19? I feel... Whenever the NFL, like, you see 50 in the NFL game,

you're like, it's crazy. But did you guys see the Dallas drop 33 points in the fourth quarter? I literally. didn't because I turned off the game when it was 40 to 19 to get ready for this show. And he scored 14 more points. 33 points. It is the second most points of the fourth quarter in the history of the NFL. Wow.

Is you serious? Yeah. Isn't that crazy? 33 points in one quarter. 33 is an extremely high number. There's only 15 minutes at a quarter. How many into the defense score of those points? Because I'm the same as Craig.

I kind of stuff. I tuned out a little bit as the game was just out. Literally, they strip sack Matt Ryan again to end the game and they returned it. Why wasn't Matt Ryan in the game? I don't know. But what else is it going to do? And then they were like, it doesn't have that much going on. And then they were like, you're down.

And then the Cowboys' offense went out. They just recovered the fumble. And then they just immediately ran for a touchdown. It was wild. Anyway. It was at the point when like Malik Davis was running in 20-yard touchdowns like Tony Pollard. So there go.

Cowboys big winner. I want to get to fantasy defenses and stuff later in the show. but for right now, Craig, who's your first winner of the day other than 54 points for Dallas? It's Joe Burrow. Joe Cool. Joe Burr. What is his official nickname?

Does he have one? Has he officially cemented his nickname or not yet? Is it Burr? Like, he's icy cold? I feel like Joe Burrow is a good name. And like nicknames are for people that, like, don't have good names. Like Joe Montana never had a nickname because, like, he's Joe Montana. That doesn't require any name.

I kind of like Joey B. But you're not going to call him that. Oh, I don't talk to him. Like Jerome Bettis was the bus. He was good, you know? Jerome Bettis is a good name. Four syllables, though. Four syllables.

Who's the best player to have a nickname? Like, Sequin. I'm just saying, I think that if your name is three syllables, it's hard to give you a nickname. Perhaps. Anyway, Joe Burrow. Joe Marlboro is three and O against the Kansas City Chiefs. Three and O, he is the only quarterback to beat Mahomes three straight times. He's the only quarterback to be undefeated against Mahomes in multiple games.

this is crazy. Like I also would like, Hi Fitz, I'm coming right at you. You and Stephen Ruiz, and I don't know if it was Ben-Sulloch, but a lot of other people were very out on the Bengals this year.

And all the Norm core fantasy and real football fans, the Bill Simmons types, the like, we listen to analytics, but it's not our whole life. We were like, why are people like,

we're overthinking the Bengals thing? The Bengals into the Super Bowl, Joe Burroughs are really fucking good, and the Bengals improve their offensive line. Why are we overthinking this? And what has happened? The Bengals are really fucking good. Well, I mean, honestly, yeah.

I mean, I think that the, they're absolutely crushing it. And, like, I mean, I thought that the Ravens were going to win the division and the first of all, we should like have a college football playoff committee because the fact that the Ravens are technically in the lead in the AFC North, even though they won like 10 to 9 or whatever against the Broncos. The Broncos and then the Bengals that come out like kind of wallop the Chiefs. But no, I was completely wrong about the Bengals to begin because I kind of didn't think they could win games like this.

They looked like an actual complete-ass team. But what do you mean? You didn't think they could win games like this. They went to the Super Bowl doing that. People thought they were lucky, though. They were fucking, I'm sorry. No, no, two things can be true. They were fucking lucky.

They gave up nine sacks in a playoff game and one. Like, that's ridiculous. And then completely revamped their offensive line. Yeah, it didn't work till like two weeks ago. Yeah, I was going to say, their offensive line hasn't been all that great all year round. I think they're just like hitting their stride at the right time again. Yes.

Yes, that's exactly it. They were hitting their stride again. And again, a lot of what I was worried about with the Bengals was that, Basically, you look at a Super Bowl season backwards sometimes and you're like, honestly, a lot of Super Bowls are just like the two healthiest teams in each conference meet in the Super Bowl. And like, I just looked at the Bengals. My thinking coming to the year was Ravens were the least healthy team. Bengals were like the most healthy team in the AFC. What if that doesn't happen again?

A lot of that did play out. Like they have injuries. Jamar Chase has a hip injury, all this. What's impressive is they're overcoming it. What's impressive is that Joe Mixing's out with a concussion for two weeks. And then Samajai Pryne, just like actually checking down to Samajie. Pryne was like essential for the Bengals in this game. It is like,

there was one play where I remember thinking like the Bengals have so many things. Like obviously get the ball to Jamar Chase in third and seven or whatever. But when there's a third and seven where like Joe Burrow checked it down to Pryan and there were three Chiefs defenders at the sticks. And Samajah kind of ran at them and then like dove really kind of dove. Like he got down and like extended all the way and he got every inch of it. And I just remember thinking like they don't have all those little ways to win. It was kind of like they were chucking it up.

like Ho-Chamar Chase, like, breaks and tackles and stuff. And now it's that that they can play run defense. They can run the ball. Like, they're running at the middle. And they, yeah. Yeah, their power game is there. They can do. I feel like Burrow wasn't checking down in a way that was actually helpful.

I think we're kind of also over it. We're like gobbledygooking this. I think here's what happened. The team has an identity. The team has experienced now. And the team is matching Joe Burroughs personality. Yeah. They're clutch.

Also, yeah. But, yeah. Like, you nailed it. The clutch thing, too. like Joe Burrow is, the reason he has all these nicknames, Joey, you know, Joe cool, whatever,

all these things. Like that play, the play that basically sealed the game for the Bengals, it was, I think third and 10, third and 11. And to me,

I was like watching the game, I was watching multiple games at the time, so I didn't have the sound on for the Bengals. I thought at one point, they called the play dead because he had like two guys rushing at him with no one blocking him.

And I was like, and he just wasn't moving. And he just like, didn't care. He just threw the ball. And I was like, wait, that wasn't a dead play.

I thought that was, I thought they'd called it dead because no one was blocking these guys. And he just like, without, you know, just like not phased whatsoever, just a laser to T. Higgins, I think over the middle of field to like get a first down, seal the game, then they kneeled it out from there.

And to me, that's just like so, emblematic of kind of like who Joe Burrow is and who this team, the identity they have. They're just, they have so much swag going in there. And now, you know, obviously they've been the Chiefs three times a row. Like, they've assumed the personality of Burrow now. Like, I don't know. They're not afraid of anything.

Yeah. No, to your point, what's that Twitter joke where it's like, I'm not wrong, I'm not wrong as you shrink into a corn cop. And I know I'm at risk of being like, I'm not wrong, I'm not wrong. Basically, I think that sometimes when, first, remember how bad the Bengals were like 14 months ago and how the whole thing was, oh my God, like, we hope they don't get Joe Burrow hurt. And I kind of was like, look, I know last year was like cool, but they won't do that again. I think it's such a on the nose metaphor that the score was literally the same as the AFC championship game. They just did it again. It was 27 and 24.

Like it's just so funny where you come back and you're like, ah, it can't happen. It's like, yeah. They're just, they, I think they just looked better.

And also they were dropping eight into coverage again. And it flummoxed homes again, which was also wild. How they had a year to get ready for that? How is that still a problem for the guy? They still got Joe Burrow. They still got two elite receivers. It was,

no, but yeah, shout out of Burrow, RIP to Stephen and I. I didn't, I didn't mean to like, I'm not actually clear. We still said we'd be the playoffs.

I just said I didn't think they win the division. And they are technically not winning the division. Do not try and get off on a technicality here? You guys did not think the Bengals are going to be a solid team. All I ask you, who's winning the Eagles? Right now is the Bengals. All right. Who is more impressive today, really?

The Ravens are the Bengals. Speaking of impressive, dude, Jalen Hertz. But like, not just Jalen Hertz. Jalen hurts in the first half. Because you know what? I think we overrate sometimes, you know, fantasy points and them being scored. underrate when they're scored

because when the like your player's scoring in the fourth quarter yeah yeah it's like you know what's the best thing ever when your player is good immediately and Jalen Hertz is just it's all gravy from there yes how much less stressful is your life your whole like I'm not to be dramatic

it kind of changes your whole Sunday totally yes I mean I completely agree it's like when so this is of course a terribly homer thing to say but like it reminds me of the CX Super Bowl when they just absolutely annihilated the Broncos. I enjoyed the fuck at that game. Number one, because they won. But number two, it was a fucking blowout and I could just have fun the whole time. I didn't have to

really worry about them, like, losing at the end or whatever. It's just, this is so much fun. That's like what happens when you get up big earlier. Like, you have several guys that go off in the first half. You're like, everything after this is just house money. Like, I'm good. Because let's be honest, like, most of how we base our feelings on a player's performance is whether or not they reach the Yahoo projection. And there is no better feeling than your quarterback hitting the Yahoo projection at half time. Everything is just gravy at that point. And so on that note, Jalen Hertz,

25 fantasy points today at half time. It's beautiful. Last week, he had like that again at half time. Last week he had 120 rushing yards, like three minutes and in the second quarter. Isn't this the opposite of last year too? Because last year he was the garbage time, or I don't know about garbage time,

but in the fourth quarter he was like racking up tons and tons of points. Now you're like lighting a cigarette at halftime hanging out. Jaylen Hertz hasn't even played in the single ditches of the fourth quarter. I met it. Also, by the way, so on the whole season, all the quarters, all the games, Jalen Hertz is just straight up the number one quarterback in fantasy. Just in the first half, only six quarterbacks have more fantasy points than Jailen Hertz. That's crazy.

Just in the first half. The Eagles are the team, especially in the NFC, that like they can just look like a total buzzsaw at any given time. Like, they just look so freaking good sometimes. unbelievable. I think it's fun that Jalen, like it makes you calm when he's up, but also Jalen Hertz is like the most calm quarterback. And so his demeanor.

He makes you into him, which is nice. But the Eagles are a buzzsaw. And then it started with A.J. Brown, who had the revenge game against the Titans. Mm-hmm. So Titans traded A.J. Brown or the Eagles during the NFL draft. Today, A.J. Brown, eight catches. 119 yards, two touchdowns. He had twice as many catches and three times as many yards as the entire Titans receiving

Corps combined. Like all their wide receivers. Hyvitz loves these type of stats. I do. It's funny. You'd be great on sports science. You really would. You like these like random comparison stats.

It's not random. It's they gave it. That's not, don't even get me started. Anyway, all the guys who were traded did well. The, I'm just saying,

everybody who was traded did well. AJ Brown did, like, sports science? I thought that was good. He's got twice as many cats. No, no, no. It's always fun.

But like, that has nothing to do with like, like, like, I don't know. You always do stuff like that where it's like Jalen Hertz in the first half had more points than all four Cowboys running backs.

And it's like, all right, that's fun, I guess. One team traded him to the other team and then against the... Whatever. You're right, but that wasn't one of them. Fine. You know what's one cool thing about A.J. Brown? So Jalen Waddle has my favorite touchdown dance.

He literally does the Waddle. A.J. Brown, a couple other guys do this too. He does the too small. Yes. That is the most insulting, simple touchdown dance you could ever do. and he does it so quickly. He's like on the way down,

catching the touchdown, and he already is starting to, like, put his hand next to him. His legs going too small. It's the best. And also remember when he did the little finger point of the, like, oh yeah.

That was really good. Does he count like the numbers of guys that are like around him or whatever? Yeah. Well, because he was like double or tripletine and they all fell down. So disrespectful. Two, three.

So good. I love too small. So other people who were traded and then did really well. Devante Adams, number one fantasy wide receiver today. by a lot. Christian McCaffrey,

eight catches for 80 yards in a touchdown just as a receiver. He's the number one running back. And the Tyree Kill, nine catches, 146 yards. And he's now the third fantasy wide receiver overall.

Yeah, three out of the top four were traded in the off season. Crazy. Love it. Wild. Speaking of Devonte Adams, I feel like just so like, Craig,

you were just mentioning AJ Brown. Like, AJ Brown to me is just like, he overpowers people with his size, his speed combination. Like, he's just stronger and bigger than like the guys trying to guard him.

when I'm watching Devante Adams I mean it's not like he's a small player but he sort of lives in I guess like the Andre Hopkins zone where it's like how is this guy open every fucking play how is he catching every pass he's not like the fastest guy on the field

he's not the biggest guy he's not small but he's not the biggest guy on the field but yet he just like dominates every freaking play like to me it's just like he's got that knack he's just so good he's just so good at getting open so his footwork is immaculate But, and I think he also kind of exists in this plane where he just sikes people out before they even like start to play kind of deal.

Yes, yes. You know what I mean? Like, he just knows, like, they just know he's going to win for whatever reason. The real answer is I think Devante Adams is like the smartest wide receiver because like you're right, he doesn't have like the physical skill set. It's he has or whatever you want to call fundamentals. There's a really good ESPN profile of him like Tim Kian where he like explains his routes and he's talked to Mays about how. he runs his routes and stuff and Marin Fader at the ringer. But basically, you really think of him like a point guard or a shooting guard.

I'm bad on the NBA these days, Craig. But who's like the best person is just getting to the rim? Is it Steph? Steph is, Steph around the rim this season? He has his highest shooting percentage around the rim is Nicola Yokic. Steph Curry. I like loading up, Craig, to talk about the warriors. I can talk for hours.

Yeah, but it's true. It's the same thing where it's just like... It's like his body control and his brains and knowing where to go and how to contort his body. It is similar. But it's also like they can't, like an NBA player kind of can't explain to you what they were thinking when they make a move, like when they do all this stuff. It's just like you read and react and instinct and you have ideas going into it.

Like the release off the line of scrimmage, that's Devante Adams superpower. He's just better at that than everyone. But it's all happening within a second. It's extra leverage and like gets you off balance and then he just absolutely annihilates you. It's just so, it's cool to watch. But you're so right, D.K., like Dandre Hopkins is a great comp because if somebody asked me why is Tyree Kill so good? I'd say, well, he's the fastest player in the league. Why is Justin Jefferson so good? I'm like, well, he's so quick and can get in and out of routes and

he's so electric. A.J. Brown, he's so strong. D.K. Meck after, he's enormous. He's enormous. Just explosive. Somebody asked me, why, why is Devante Adams so good? I'd be like, I don't know, he's just really good. It's the opposite. All of Hopkins's cool catches are, he's contested. Adams, is, Devante's always open. But I'm not, well, I, but I understand what D. saying because there is no one thing that I think of when I talk about Devante Adams or DeAndre Hopkins. They're both just kind of good. It's like

it's why both of their games are going at least in theory I think, going to last, they're going to last longer into their careers. Like they're going to still be good 33, 34 years old, I think, just because they are so good. Yeah. If I asked you, if it's just off the top of your head, how big is DeAndre Hopkins?

What would you say? I know this because I've seen him in person. I don't think he's six. I think he's five eleven. He's six. He's six. He's six. He's six one according to... I have seen him in person and like, I think he's six feet. And so is Devante Adams. Devante Adams is six one.

I think when I picture these guys, they're way bigger. Yeah. I thought Devante was like six three. All right. Losers. Quarterbacks and injuries. Today was a really tough day out there. And Highfitz, your turf thing was a factor today.

Trevor Lawrence went down and looked bad on turf. I thought he tore his ACL or Taurus or something. Of course. And our theory that we live off of, if it looks bad, it's fine, and if it looks fine, it's bad. Looked really bad. Came back and played in the second half. Don't know why.

They were down like 20 to the Lions, but he came back and played. Lamar, Lamar heard his knee, ruled out for the game, says he's going to be out days or weeks. So essentially, we have no idea. Big. Thanks, Harbaugh. And then Jimmy G.

This is so brutal for the Niners, man. The Niners are good. Jimmy G broke his vote. He's likely out for the year. They have Brock Purdy, who came in and did a good job. and won the game. DK, who's Brock Purdy?

I don't really know. He was Mr. Irrelevant in the draft. He was the last guy taken in the draft. Pass that. Not much. I didn't study him, to be honest. I mean, Shanahan is really good at making mediocre quarterbacks work in the system.

You know, one of my favorite stats that Haifitz has ever given is that the most passing yards in the first 16 games of their career. Number one is Mahomes. Number two is Nick Mullins. That it's like Romo, Kurt Warner, Andrew Locke,

just all these like incredible people. I just like Googled Brock Purdy. Brock Purdy, he played for Iowa State. He has a sibling named Chubba or Chuba. I'm not sure. Chubba Purdy and Brock Purdy. What a, it's an all name team here, speaking of names. It's not exactly a Cloice box.

No, it's not Cloyce box, but it's like up there. Cloyce and Bois, Brock and Chubba. But Niners fans are dejected. I'm from the Bay. I have a ton of Niners fans. My dad is a diehard Niners fan, and they're just broken. Like this team is so good. could have made a real run.

And now it's like, you know, who knows what they can do with Brock Purdy? But this is a really shitty blow for the Niners. Yeah, and this combined with, again, Cowboys, 54 points. I know it's the Colts, but still 54. And then the way the Eagles just absolutely throttle the Titans today, which are actually a good team. And it's just, I think it's for fantasy. It's good if you have Christian McCaffrey and just get all these Brock Party dumpoffs.

But yeah, in real life, it's pretty tough. Speaking of that game, though, other, we mentioned Lamar in days and weeks. They already got the day to day the week to week. I can't play days weeks, come. Days or weeks. They just merged him, day to week. It won't be months. Well, he said it wasn't season ending, so I guess we got that going for us.

Speaking of the diners game, though, another lose, I mean, just Tua. Wasn't his best game. Nope. Did this vindicate all the stat heads, all the analytics heads out there? Yeah, maybe could Stephen and I be revived from the Bengals thing right into the backfuss? I mean, we didn't kind of down on Tua all year. I mean, all Haifitz and I do is tell D.K. how he underthrows every single pass. I was going to say, I kind of like.

Tua. What was weird? Here's the thing. We've been talking about underthrowing the long passes. What was weird was overthrowing all the short passes. He was sailing passes today.

Everything. For whatever. Well, we also were talking about how Tua hasn't exactly played the most elite set of defenses over the past five weeks and coming up against the Niners here, it made a difference.

It's almost like if you don't have your best or your top two starting tackles against the best defense in the NFL. It's not good. Sorry, Tua. Yeah, RIP. He's dead.

RIP, it's over the same. We might see it, not see it, days, weeks. No, it'll be, I think, are they Sunday day football next week? Dolphins Chargers? It'll be Herbert to it. Oh, God. Two teams behind destroyed offensive lines. Great.

I hate the Chargers. All right. Next up. Well, actually, speaking of the Chargers, just analytics in general is just kind of on the line between Mike McDaniel going front and fourth and two. And then it being overturned with the Gisichanas helmet ball. He should have caught that, though, right? He should have.

He just didn't. No one cares. when the analytics work. People only care when the analytics fail. Like Brandon Staley going for two last week, winning. No, no one cares about that. Didn't work. This is a prisoner of the moment, but that's cool. I'm just saying.

It's real. No, who, no one cares. I'm not saying that's right or good. Wait, why is Staley on this list? I don't get it. What did he do? Because he's an analytics guy. Dance, monkey. Oh, and he lost. He just lost.

So anytime they lose. The charge lost, analyst, analyst guy lost. That's it. Doesn't matter if he's the analytics. He's an analytics. This is a bite. The binary world we live in. If you're an analytics guy, you lose.

Analytics suck. Is analytics not based on binary, D.K? It's the whole point. Oh, man. All right. There. I'm mad about that. Now, I'll go to Not Mad.

Just disappointed. The Father Award. Hmm. I'm not mad at Mark Andrews. I'm not mad at him. I'm not going to be mad at Mark Andrews. Four catches, 53 yards. It's fine.

I'm just disappointed because since week seven, Mark Andrews has fewer fantasy points to come. Calipitz. Oh. Holy crap. How's that possible? You didn't see that coming. Doesn't matter.

Same amount of games. Five games each. Fewer points to Calipitz. Wow. That's crazy. Mark Andrews has fewer since week seven. He has fewer fantasy points in Zach Earths,

who is on injured reserve. He's fewer fantasy points to Dallas Goddard. Who's been on injured reserve? Like Mark Andrews, like since week, basically just like worst Gerald Everett. Oh, God. Mark Andrews, he could have, like,

he could rattle off whatever, six straight 100-yard games to end the season, and I still never get out of my mind. Him, like, volleyball setting a touchdown pass last week. Well, just, what are you doing? He didn't, it wasn't like a drop.

He, like, literally set it. It, like, went up in the air, perfectly lofted with both hands. Like, someone was going to come in and fucking spike it through like the uprights or something. I'll never get that out of my brain. I don't think I'll ever draft him because of that. Here's that market.

It's because he just doesn't have a touchdown. Like that's literally it. If he just wasn't volleyball spiking the touchdowns, it'd be fine. But he does. So he's Kate Otten. I feel so bad about the Ravens offense. Like they're so gross in my mind. The team, like I have no confidence in them.

They're five and one in their last six games. I love fantasy. It's just poisons our brains. See, that's why I'm out on the Bengals. Bengals? Dude, come on. Ravens are the Ravens the first place team in the AFC North. Did you guys? Yeah,

six or five and one, last six games. Greg Roman came out this weekend or whatever. I forget like a couple days ago that he's interviewing, potentially interviewing for the Stanford head coaching job. And everyone is just rejoicing about this. Like get him the fuck out of the NFL. We don't want him around Lamar. Like all the fantasy people are like, get him out of here.

They've like never won less than 12 games with him and Lamar. Get him the fuck out. out of here. Speaking of disappointing tight ends, I want to throw another name on the pile here. George Kittle, I could ever be mad at George Kittle. The way he plays is just awesome.

Like he runs through people's faces. You know, he just is a really fun player to watch. But he has two catches for 22 yards today. The 49ers threw the ball 41 times. Two catches. You're not going to see the 49ers throw 41 times all that often, I feel like.

My girlfriend needed George Kittle to score today. And she just kind of turning me. He was like, Why don't they throw the ball to George Kittle? And I was like, what, uh-huh, hmm. It's a great question.

I don't know. Excellent query. I don't know the answer to that. Couldn't tell you. Here's his last four weeks in a half PBR. This week, 3.2. The week before, 4.1. The week before that, 22.4.

That was fun. The week before that, 2.6. Do you want to know the most annoying part about those numbers? So 3, 4, 22, 2. He's the tight end 4 in that stretch. The tight end situation. The tight-ed position is just a, like, I know that I've probably said this over the years,

much times, it's a wasteland. It sucks. Worse than ever before, I feel like right now. Niners are four in that stretch. Oh, my God. Too busy winning! You're right, though, D.K. I think George Kittle is,

we should do a power hour towards the end of the year about the most frustrating players in all fantasy. George Kittles up there this year. He was the 37th overall pick, according to ADP. Yeah. 37th. Okay. Moving on here.

I'm not mad at Jalen Waddle. He was banged up today. I know that. I'm not mad at him. I'm a little disappointed. I'm not going to lie. I think I was sold a fraudulent product, maybe. The Shaken Bake and Bake.

A bill of goods. The Shake and Bake. Of Waddle and Tyree Kill. It's no longer Shake and Bake. It's just Shake and that's Tyree Kill. Jalen Waddle has kind of disappeared like in the last five, six weeks since Tua came back from the concussion. Jalen Waddle has not been the guy that I thought he would be.

Weeks 1 to 6, they were both top 10 wide receivers. Hill and Waddle. Last four weeks, Waddle's the 57th wide receiver in fantasy in the last four weeks. The guy's doing nothing. It's like the Talladega Nights. It's like, you're wrecking my life.

Tyree Kill. It's like, you're wrecking my life. Living in his house. Can I win for once? But if you win, how am I win? Yeah, I get it. you're right.

Okay, yeah. Yeah, okay, what you say like that? That makes it. Well, speaking of shake and bake, there's a new, it's okay, it's a new shake and bake. It's just D.K.

McCaff and Tyler Lockett. I was going to give them the identical. Is that, they're a new duo? Well, well, I was, not even fraternal twin,

just like identical because they literally like had identical almost lines, just almost the same. Mechaf had eight catches, Lockett at nine. Metcalf had 127, lock it at 128.

They both had a touchdown. Oh, I don't know, but Craig, is that too weird of a stat for you? Gino's like the perfect parent. He's just like helping each kid equally, he's not playing favorites. Oh my God, I love this. The best part about this is like the contrast between Lockett and Metcalf in like almost every single way could not be more different.

It's just like the movie Twins, you know, famous with Arnold Schwarzenegger, Danny DeVito. I don't know. You guys might be too young, haven't seen it, whatever. I know of it solely for you explaining it to me. Okay. In this podcast. Here's the breakdown. D.K. Metcalf, obviously.

is Arnold Schwarzenegger in this metaphor. He's massive, beautiful, Greek god-built mofo. One of the coolest guys in the NFL. He has green hair. He has a cross-hearing. It's just a badass. Meanwhile, Lockett, the Danny DeVito won this analogy.

Small, balding, and I can say that because I'm balding also. He's just a dork. He writes poetry. D.K. Meck-F. once told an only fan's model in which he had booty called, to turn around and go home halfway through the trip

because he was too busy having a threesome. I don't know if he is too many. I respect that. Lockett is a virgin, or at least he was as of a couple years ago because he had told, you know, I don't even know what the story was, but he basically had talked about

how it's a big part of his faith. He's a real idea. He's abstinent. He's waiting for marriage. I think he did just get engaged. So that's going to be over pretty soon, I think, for him. Hell yeah. Have that it.

So that's great. You're right. The idea of D.K. Metcalfe. Just like soliciting. D.K. Metcalf is a sex god. Like, what are they talking about? And Tyler Locke is like actually a virgin. Like, do you think that D.K.

Metcalf like shows Tyler Lockett his phone? I don't think they talk about that stuff, probably. All time blue balls on Tyler Lockett. You know what they? Because I also think it's just the play style. DK. Metcalf, every time it gets the ball, is trying to kill people. It just tries to run through you. And it's like, duck down.

Grenade. Like, it just goes down. Diff and duck. At the end of the day, though, here's the thing. They're both fucking good at football. On the year,

D.K. McCaff, 67 catches, 798 yards, five touchdowns, 172 points of PPR, Lockett almost identical 90, or 66 catches, sorry, 836 yards

and seven catches. This is the best. This is the greatest duo of all time. Well, since movie twins. So, D.K., you want to help finance the DK. McCaff,

Tyler Lockett, Buddycott movie? Absolutely. Can we get that made? We'll talk to Bill about it, see what ringer films. This is like a real tangent to this, but it's related. And honestly, we might just cut this entire thing.

But I just got to ask you this. I was thinking about this a couple weeks ago. A thing that's like never discussed in football these days is, you know, like, this was, this was 100% a thing for like decades and decades is that like boxers, but also football players. You're going to say they wouldn't ejaculate for weeks. Yeah, they wouldn't like like this is a thing. Like Muhammad, like all the prize fighters and boxes believe this. You can't have sex.

the run up to a prize fight or any kind of fight. And football players is the same thing. There's a rule. Like a lot of football coaches subscribe to that like, you know, none of the players really should be doing anything until the game is over. And I have long wondered. Coaches think that? I haven't really heard that.

Yes. You've never heard of coaches being like basically saying. I've heard of the boxing thing. I haven't really heard it. I feel like Jim Harbaugh is the captain of this theory. The guy who thinks that chickens are a afraid or a cowardly bird. That's right. Nervous.

So I've been wondering like, you know, it's like, how does some teams get in college a recruiting advantage where you go to some places and they're preaching, you know, faith, you know, maybe perhaps, you know, abstinence or maybe at least in some way abstaining from participating. And maybe I don't know. How is Georgia like getting all this recruiting? Well, have you ever seen he got game? Well, close, exactly. Clos the recruiting gap. And I'm like, other coaches are kind of like, actually, you should be going at it as much as possible. I mean, Philip Rivers had a long successful career.

True. And he was obviously having sex a lot. Because, but that's the Metcalf Lockett thing, isn't it? It's like the two, they both work. You have to just be at one of the extremes. You just can't be in the middle. Different strokes for different folks, literally, you know? Oh.

Anyway, they're both awesome. They're both awesome to be clear. Not making fun of Lockett. He's incredibly good, actually. Just don't be in the middle. that's the thing. Tyler Lockett, like, every year I feel like I thought the year prior was kind of a fluke, and then he just does it again. Well, they resigned him to like a

multi-year deal. I think if it was not last off season the year before, and everybody in Seahawks Sturtt was like, really? Like, he's getting kind of old. Yeah, but he's just consistent. He's just to maintain. He's been awesome. And everybody was like, oh, Lockett and Russell Wilson, they have the mind-meld connection. He's fine, which, you know, Smith. Works out just fine. Turns out he's just really good at football. We did the all-boring team entering the season, Tyler Lock, it was like the biggest whiff that we did not put on the all boring team, but was boring to draft.

And I guess part of it, to be fair, is we did not foresee Gino Smith just being like an actual top 10 quarterback. The Seahawks included. Yeah. Exactly. The team who wanted your lock and did Russell. Right. All right. Next award here, D.K.

All right. This is the Finding Money in the Venmo Account Award, which was previously known as the finding money in the Couchons Award. But we modernized it because people don't really carry cash anymore. or now you're just like, you go out to dinner and you're like, hey, someone, will you Venmo me for the dinner? I'll just buy this or whatever. And then you go in there and you have $100 in your Venmo count. It's the best day ever.

That's the equivalent of what rookie receivers are going to give us down the stretch. They're already doing it. Christian Watson for the Packers. This guy, what the hell is this guy's deal? Every time he touches his ball, it's a frickin touchdown. All he does is score touchdowns. He has eight touchdowns and that's 17 touches. Garrett Wilson, I think, is a certified baller.

he had 162 yards today receiving. Alec Pierce had a good game. Johan Dotson had a touchdown today. Drake London 12 targets. John Dotson had a touchdown DK. I saw, thank you. It was sweet. Spin move,

minute left. Ooh, that was a really good move. Yeah. Even Traylen Berks had a touchdown. Unfortunately, he got hit really hard and left with a concussion. But like the bottom line is what we've been telling you guys for the last like

couple weeks is that rookies, their production just absolutely explodes typically in the second half of year. It's just for whatever reason going back last, last 12, 13 years, you can look at the numbers. It's like 50% more production in the second half of the year for rookie receivers.

So just another good day for the rookie receivers. I want to point that out. Christian Watson is having like a Robert Tonian level year. What's up with these guys on the Packers having incredibly efficient touchdown heavy seasons?

Maybe it's Aaron Rogers, I guess. Probably. Probably that Craig solved. Yeah, but what he's doing is pretty damn impressive too. Like you guys remember a couple weeks ago, I compared him to D.K. McCaff stylistically a little bit just because he's so explosively fast.

And he has all the threesomes. Right, that too. But man, like he just runs away from people. He had like a 45-yard touchdown run today. It doesn't get crazy to this. The last four weeks, the number one receiver in fantasy is Devante and the number two fantasy receiver is Christian Watson. Jesus.

Just straight up second. He's ahead of Justin. Do you think he can keep this up or is this like absolute fluke? Can he keep up literally? Well, he can't keep up what he's doing. Half of his touches or touchdowns? No, no, he cannot. I guess that was a rhetorical question.

All times sell high. Christian Watson. To answer your question, because I was just curious, he has eight touchdowns, less 17 touches. Julio Jones had more than eight touchdowns in his season, like one time in his career. Jeez. Deonti Johnson might not have eight touchdowns in his career.

I'd have to go back and check. He had another really frustrating day today. He's got to be the most frustrating receiver. I know I'm getting off topic here, but yeah. It's the opposite. of like, if the rookie receivers get better, we need a word for the Deonti Johnson's, the veterans who just kind of get worse.

Just kind of like teeter off. I'm trying to think of a guy who's done that. Keenan Allen. Okay, speaking of found money, speaking of the Venmo analogy, I don't know how far we want to stretch it. But defense is, anytime your defense goes off,

it feels like, you know, you checked your Venmo on Sunday morning and somehow you have 100 more dollars than you started with. Cleveland's defense, three touchdowns. The Deshawn Watson Day was not good. He didn't,

he looked extremely rust, yet they still beat the Texans handily. Because freaking Cleveland's, they scored two defensive touchdowns and they scored a special team's touchdown. 30 points in fantasy. I was going up against Cleveland in one fantasy league,

and I looked at that halfway through the day. I was like, fuck! And then I have Dallas. And so I almost cut up. It was amazing. So considering that Dallas, the defense plays the Texans next week, and I told you over under

like 20 fantasy points for the Cowboys, what would you even take? over under 20 that's that's pretty steep yahu never really gets like risky with the defense projections like they never go higher than like nine they need to step that up start getting frisky

on this so I have I have two thoughts for you off this thing one just generally we need a word for when you have like a regular score in your fantasy lineup but for abnormal reasons like if I told you hey Lamar Jackson and the Brown's defense gonna get you like 35 points today. I had both those guys on my team this week.

Yeah. And you're like, all right, cool. 25 from Lamar, 10 from the Browns D. Cool. And it's like, actually, you're going to get one from Lamar and 34 from the Browns Day. And you're like, that's just, you know what I mean? We're like, you don't know it's weird until you click on the, and see the whole matchup. It's like in chopped when they have to make like spaghetti, but the ingredients are like quail eggs and like sawdust. Pencil shavings.

Oh, man. That's one of them where it's like, that sentence has never been said. And that he makes ice cream. Sentence has never been said. Dude, Dallas has projected eight points against Houston next week. Come on.

This is my other one. I have a bone to pick with defensive fantasy scoring. I think this is the new hill I'm willing to die on. All the scoring for how defense works is ridiculous. and I've come to feel this way because it started with shutouts because a shutout is the most incredible thing. There's basically one a month. There's only been like four shutouts. And like it's rare. So aside from it's rare, it's also, you know, literally the entire point of defense. I know this is not, I'm not saying people are idiot. I'm just going to spell this out.

You can't lose if the other team doesn't score. It's literally the most valuable thing a defense can do. That is a shutout is worth five points in ESPN. Five, the default. That's it? A fucking, dude, five points on Yahoo, it's worth 10. Even 10, a strip sack touchdown is nine because the sack is one. The fumble recover is two.

And then the touchdown is six. A strip sack touchdown is worth one fewer point than not allowing any points in real life. it should be like 30 points for your defense if you don't give up a fuck way. I agree with this. It should be. I think you have to nail the head. I mean, I don't disagree with you,

but you're very fired up about this. I like it. I think you're right, though. I think the reason why Yahoo and ESPN they don't have this rule is because I think they think the idea of a defense frequently scoring, defense is scoring the same amount as like Patrick Mahomes

every four weeks. They just don't want that. I agree. It's just there's no perfect way to actually spell out all the yardages and things, but I think the short answer, or is like, I mean, you should just basically be about points. Like, I don't know.

No one likes it. It's one of those things where you want to die on the hill. And then people in your group chat are mad about it because people don't like change. And you're like, is this worth my energy? Because like if a defense lets up only three points and they have no sacks, picks nothing, but they win the game 30 to three. They get like seven points. I'm so glad you asked this.

I went back and checked because I was so mad. The Jaguars shut out the cults in week two or three or something. And they had like 19 points. they're like the third highest scoring defense that week. The third highest scoring defense allowed zero real life points. We should, we need to change this. Anyway. All right.

Next award. I'm all fired up. This is the, you're free to go award for the teams acquitted of fraud. And I got to be honest, the Vikings. Yeah. Their last three wins. Jets, Pat, Bills. Put up 27 today on a very good Jets defense.

They held on. close game in one. The Jets D has been really good the last month. They haven't let up 20 points since Halloween. And the Vikings move the ball and his team's 10 and 2. So, kind of still think they might be fronts. I'm just saying. I don't disagree, but I'm starting to be like, all right. I mean, they literally backed up. They just beat the Jets, the Pats, they got killed by Dallas, then they beat Buffalo, they beat Washington, they beat Miami. It's like, all right. I know. It's just, very unfair, but like, again, they've scored 10 more points than they've allowed in the entire season.

The points margin is bad. They are, I mean, I just don't know at what point where they just keep beating good teams in close games where I have to be like, all right, I don't know what else to do. It's easy to sit and say like, oh, well, they're the Jets. But the Jets are, I do think the Jets are good. It's just more like they haven't won by more than eight points since week one. And at some point, that's a characteristic, like, that's a trait, you know? It's like, okay, but.

It's tough. There's always these like ifs ands, you know, or. whatever, like Brex and Berrios, I think, dropped a game-winning touchdown, you know? Exactly. Like, literally, like, they were so close to losing the Mike White. But still, yeah. It's a double-edged sword. Like, I agree with, like, both of you guys at the same time, kind of, you know what I mean? Like, on one hand, they probably should have lost because Barrio should have just caught that ball. But on the other hand, like, they're stacking these wins. They're, like, beating good teams. Like, at some point, you've got to start to respect them.

Let me ask you this. If Joe Burrow were on the Vikings, let's say last year, the Bengals and the Vikings, After last year, they traded just Kirk for Joe Burrow's swap. And the Vikings were 10 and 2 this year with Joe Burrow, and Joe Burrow had the exact same stats as Kirk Cousins. Would we feel the exact same way about the Vikings as we do right now? Or would we think they are way better because Joe Burrow is their quarterback. No, they're better because Joe Burrow has the clutch gene, whereas Kirk Cousins, you know, he, you know, he's, I mean.

But same stats, same record. I'm saying if it was the same thing, just the guy who happens to be wearing the quarterback jersey just isn't as lame as Kirk Cousins. I think it's because their identity is so lame. Yeah, it's because when the Vikings are nine and two in all like one score games, it's because, well, it's the randomness of a small sample that will eventually even out because we're not going to attribute grittiness to Kirk Cousins, but we like Joe Burrow and he's cool. And so we will give him the benefit of the doubt because he's just a winner. Yeah. And we like him.

Well, people, dude, people will hang on to their draft takes for like forever for like 20 years. Like, it's hard to get over that stuff. But it's also just because we've watched the games. you know what I mean? I see what you're saying. I think, you know what actually gives me more confidence. Again, if you're a Vikings fan, you're mad. I'm like half kidding.

Like the Vikings, I'm a Giants fan. Like, they got to seven and two or whatever by just winning games they shouldn't have won. I think that what gives me more confidence, I don't think I would actually even be willing to say or make any of the fraud jokes. If each of the last two years, we'd not seen a team start like this, just collapse in the playoffs. The Titans in the, like, last year. Steelers. We're the number one seat. Yes.

And then the Steelers started 11 and 0. And, like, sucked. What, 57 to the Browns in the playoffs that year? Without Stephansky's best game. Without their coach? In COVID, like this basement. The Vikings are better than those teams. But we just saw it twice.

That kind of bit. It's fresher in my mind, I guess. I think it has everything to do with Kirk Cousins. I really do. Well, yeah. Speaking of the Giants, you just mentioned them. I'm going to do the Kissing Your Sister Award.

For the Giants and commanders, their pivotal first matchup was a tie. Look, I know that we've gone, we've talked about the tie thing before. Like, no, I think American really likes the fact that you can tie. Except that England game. This is just ridiculous, though. Why do we have ties? We can't have ties.

Ties are stupid. This is the worst. What's the Ted Lassow quote? If God wanted ties, then she wouldn't have invented numbers. In this tie, High Fitz, who is the, who is USA and who is England in this tie? Who left feeling good? No, no. there's no England.

Like if the Giants tied like the Cowboys, that would be like USA England. I think this is... Did either team leave this game satisfied or were they both disappointed? Maybe I'm just more of a pessimist. I think the Giants are the America and Washington's England in this scenario

because Giants fans are going to be salty that Darius Slaten had a drop really late in the gate, which I actually would say it was a drop but also Daniel Jones under threw him by like eight yards and put it on the wrong shoulder. And then there's John Feliciano, one of their offensive linemen had like a taunting pouty that like pushed them at a field

range at like the worst possible moment. And then it just there were just a bunch of things that went wrong. They gave up, you guys saw like the final minute to make, like there were just a bunch of things that went wrong. Having said that, dude, the Giants, even though they had so much chance to win this game, kind of had no business winning this game. They had one yard in the final five drives of regulation. Like one yard.

Like the final three, they like lost eight yards. I mean, they're like starting Darius Slayton, who was their sixth option entering the season. They literally wanted to cut him before training camp. He's the only player who can catch the ball. Richie James, who's a career special teamer, Isaiah Hodgins, sixth round pick a few years ago. Isaiah Hodgins had four offensive snaps in his career before this season. Never mind to catch. Like he wasn't on this team a month ago.

These are the Giants starters. These aren't even guys rotating in. The starting players of the Giants are like so, sketchy that they have to kind of use all these parlor tricks to just get down the field. And so I'm really worried they have to, Washington gets the two weeks. They get to buy and they just play the Giants again. And it's, I feel like I'm bitching, but it's such a competitive disadvantage, I think, that Washington just got to prep for them a week, play them, and gets two weeks to just effectively

have like almost a playoff play in game against the same team, especially when we're so limited that so much of what we do is kind of schematically game shit that, I don't know. Meanwhile, the Giants have to go play the Eagles next week in between. Yeah, it's brutal. And that's the problem. I don't know if anyone cares, but basically because they went 0 and 2 against the Cowboys. They're going to lose to the Eagles tying this game. If they lose to Washington, they're going to lose the NFC, the divisional tiebreaker.

And they lost to the Seahawks, lost to Washington. O and to the Cowboys, they'll lose the head to head to everybody they're competing with for the wild card. So not to be dramatic, but unless they beat the Eagles, that Washington game is like a effectively the playoffs. So yeah, I'm sad. Just get rid of ties. This is stupid. They did in the playoffs.

Just to, no one remembers this. Like, they did change the playoff rules for equal positions at least. Yeah, which is really smart. Next award here. I just want to be really quick with this. This is the Brandon Cook's award for the player we don't want to admit as good at fantasy. I don't know if it's as much fantasy as it is real-life football. But, man, Corey Davis, no one has given this man credit his entire career because he was a top five pick in a draft and I get it.

But Corey Davis is good at football and Zach Wilson is not and anytime Zach Wilson doesn't play for the Jets Corey Davis is really good he's played four games without Zach Wilson this year he has over 75 yards and three of them like Corey Davis is just a good solid fundamental wide receiver

and nobody gives him credit agree fifth overall pick I think Corey Davis is the Terry McLaurin thing where he's too nice like he's not one of them like give me the ball and he's just like I'll block sure team player yeah he's also sort of been like

overshadowed everywhere he goes because, you know, obviously with the Titans, AJ Brown came in and overshadowed it. It's always some sexy talent, like stealing the limelight from him. And then like last year, Elijah Moore had like a really awesome second half of the year. And then this year, Garrett Wilson's just going off. Meanwhile, Corey Davis just continuing to play well. Helping you win games, Corey Davis. I'd love to have a Corey Davis on my football team.

Just 11 Corey Davises. Yeah. Okay. Glad Corey Davis. That's only four minutes, 40 seconds, really. Team player, we'll never talk about him ever again. Okay. Next award.

All right. This is just getting kind of sad at this point award. The Denver Broncos, Russell Wilson actually played, I mean, just on the eye test, like significantly better than he had in previous weeks. Maybe this was even like his cleanest performance,

17 out of 22, 189 yards. He scored nine fantasy points and his team scored nine points. Their average points per game went down in this game, which is hard to, like hard to, that, considering they're like the worst scoring team in the NFL, yeah, what do

what do we do with this Broncos deal? I just like, it's almost like sad at this point. They're at the point now where if they score nine points a game, their average points per game will go up. Well, the, dude, I was, again, I keep saying this, but I, the Broncos DK gave me so much shit and the Giants so much shit last year because he was like, well, the point of the football scored touchdowns, the

Giants can't. The Giants had 19 touchdowns at this point last year. The Broncos have 14. The Broncos are five, like, That's a large gap. And again, there's only, Craig and I's entire lives, there have only been five teams with fewer touchdowns through like 12 games.

I was going to say, their entire lives. This is getting into historically bad territory. But they're all like historic draft busts in their rookie year. It's like, Jamarcus Russell and like Blaine Gabber. And like teams that were like, wow,

what a huge mistake we made. And then there's Russell Wilson with $200 million. By the way, they lost to a team that had no Lamar Jackson for like three quarters. It's just so funny because the offense has a lot of players that are very good. Like Cortland Sutton is good. Judy's good.

He played today. The rookie tied end, Greg Dolsich is good. The defense is good. All right. I saw this tweet from Andrew Mason. This is unbelievable. Basically, the Broncos defense is great. And the Broncos defense has also only allowed 17 touchdowns.

Wow. And Andrew Mason had this. I know. And Andrew Mason was like, in the Super Bowl era, 70 teams have allowed 17 or fewer touchdowns. Of those 70, the first 69 of them were all 500 or better. All of them were 6 and 6. And the Broncos are 3 and 9. So you said that the Broncos defense has allowed 17 touchdowns this year,

which you said at this point last year was what the Giants had? Yeah. The Broncos defense is making their opponents on average worse than the Giants. So every game, it's just the Denver Broncos versus the 2021 New York Giants and they lose. Remember what D.K said where every week. the Broncos are like playing the Legion of Boom, but the Broncos defense is turning the other side into like a Jason Garrett offense.

And they still lose. Jason Garrett. I'm trying to do the math in my brain of the percentage of seasons Russell Wilson's been in the NFL in which his defense absolutely fucking hates him. All of them. It's incredible. Most of them, I would say.

Because the LOB, at least certain famous people in the LOB, like, I don't know if hate is the right word. I think they grew to hate him over the years. They definitely didn't like him. Does Russ have the best luck in terms of how good his defense is of any quarterback ever? I know, right? Well, I'm looking at this now. And honestly, maybe the defense is like the best way to frame this because you're right, Craig.

I'm thinking about how many quarterbacks, one, would want a defense like this, this good once of their career. Like for one year. Yeah. God, every team the Broncos play is like the Giants last year. You want to move to the tight ends who outscored Russell Wilson and one who didn't? Yes. All right. Here are the tight ends who outscored Russell Wilson.

Noah Fant, Evan Ingram, Greg Dulcich, his own player. Gerald Everett, Cole Comett, Connor Hayward. That's right, Connor Hayward. Steelers. Noah Fant was part of the Russell Wilson trade. Oh, right. So that's great.

Now you couldn't trade Russell Wilson for Noah Fant. Straight up. They're like, yeah, we're good. We like fan. I actually saw it. We have plans for fan. I actually saw this one this week. It's Connor Hayward, but like, that's crazy.

Connor Hayward was close. Russell Wilson had nine points this week. Nine. That's so bad. Connor Hayward caught one pass and he had eight points. It's so bad. I hate this. Also, I know the Connor Hayward thing because I was looking at it.

I couldn't believe that only four tiny. end's even caught a touchdown this week, which is insane, because I feel like there's at least four every week that we've never heard of. It was humbling. Every week you try to stream and we're just like, we hope, you know, you tight end just catches a touchdown. Like, well, four caught a touchdown this week, period. There's a, there's a mini Christian Watson on the loose, and it's Michael Pruitt, the tight end for the Falcons. He has seven catches this year and three of them are touchdowns. Oh, my God. You know who's just sad while we're here? Broncos get all the hate. The Rams. pathetic.

Yeah, I mean, not only did they lose. I mean, they almost beat the Seahawks. Credit goes to the Rams who have dominated the Seahawks over the last few years. But they did not win. And then after the game, we found out that Matthew Stafford has a spinal contusion, which is the reason that he went. Well, that wasn't what I meant with the pathetic. I wasn't talking about spine.

No, I know, but it's just like it's just kind of been a very sad season for the Rams. Like, they just obviously did not come back well from winning the Super Bowl last year. But yeah, Stafford has a spinal contusion. He's probably going to be out for the year, which we probably, I mean, we kind of thought that was the case. Cup should, they should pull everybody. Through 13 weeks,

the Rams are the worst team, the worst reigning champ ever. Through 13 weeks. Record-wise. Wow. You know who did well, though? Acres. Yeah, so can we have this award that you,

don't make me look at it. You can't make me look at this stat line. Cam Acres had two tests today. Who's the RB5? That was before Sunday at football. This needs to be the, I'm getting gaslit award. This did not happen.

You have to tape my eyes open for me to look at this stat line. I refuse to see it, acknowledge it, nothing. He's the fifth best running back in fantasy. This is misinformation. The Seahawks defense, I'm telling you. It's not good. It is not good.

It made this run game look pretty solid. It made John Walford look like a freaking, like all pro. Yeah, they're not good. Makers like tried desperately to quit football like a month and a half ago. And the Rams were like, yo, you have to play. We got no one else. Dude, the Seahawks took the lead with, I don't even know, was like 20-something seconds left.

And I was legitimately pretty worried that John Walford was going to lead them on a game-winning touch, or game-winning drive. I was like, their defense can't do shit. John Walford had 178 yards and two picks,

and they almost won. Does that really a stat line? It felt so much worse. It felt so much better. Gino-Smith had nearly 400 yards and three touchdowns, and it was like a tight game. I'm shocked that that's his stat line

because I felt like they kept giving up big plays to him. Yeah, that's hilarious. That's the NFL. baby. Every week I track how many quarterbacks can't throw for 200 yards. It was 12 this week, by the way. Twelve quarterbacks didn't throw over 200 yards. But what's the record of those 12?

Pull up the 12 right now. Five and six. It's always around 500. Dak Prescott, they're for 170. But they won. And they scored like 50 points. I'm just saying I won and they were running the ball. I'm not happy in this new world we're living in. Tyler Huntley, 187. They won. Won the game.

Kirk Cousins, 173. They won. Yeah. Sick of it. sick of it. Rogers, 182. They won. I hate it. Can he pick it?

197. They won. Honestly, the problem is throwing. Yeah, it is. I'm also, I'm looking, I want to do burn book, and I was just realizing Camakers was the first person we burned this season. He's back. Can we do Kittle?

Should we do George Kittle? Oh, you want to burn George Kettle? Dude, the last four weeks, he's torched you. Tight-end four. I mean, listen, if he, If he's been outscored by Kyle Pitts, who is like the captain of the burn book, we have to burn George Kittle. You're still going to play George Kittle, though, right?

Well, you literally have to because there's six teams up by next week. And so, like, I think the best tight end available is like... Michael Pruitt. Basically, toss up, really. Check if Connor Hayward or Michael Pruitt are available, you're obviously starting them over George Kittle. But if not, I guess you're stuck with Kittle. I think we burn them.

I don't know what you guys are. to burn Deanche Swift and then he actually had a good day. He looked fantastic today. I think he's back. Yeah. D.K. Do you have anyone better than George Kittle for Burnbook? No.

Kittle's a good one. Kittle, I have like the gap between like my confidence in him as a player and my confidence in him in my lineup is maybe bigger than any player. Like I just don't trust him. George Kittle. Welcome to the burn book. That's what you get for leading your team to victory over and over the Four and O.

Last four games. Four and O. Last four games. We don't care. Oh my God. We truly don't care at all. Stop blocking for your team, George Kittle. Run routes, catch passes.

It's Corey Davis problem. Team player. Got to be more selfish. All right. Thank you, D.K., thank you, Craig. Thank you to Kai for production help. Thank you, Lorne. Lauren.

Thank you, Bob Dylan. Oh, damn. Wow. Well, that's a big guns. That's such a big gun. You've been saving that? You guys heard of him. That's great.

Barely Nice Bobby D's getting up there 81 years old He's 81 Dude he's still cranking out music They all are Like Mick Jagger performs

Paul McCartney still makes music Elton John's had like 20 farewell tours A lot of yeah a lot of them Old people are like on their last tour But it's like it's not their last tour But like it might be Like Springsteen's doing the big one Elton John

John's been doing farewell tours For like 10 years Gets butts and seats Craig Estate planning Dude I went to Ellen John in September. Saw him in the Pittsburgh. Saw Billy Joel.

She got my mom of Springsteen tickets for her Christmas gift. Is Elton John doing like just tour after tour as he's like well into his 70s and Mick Jagger? Is that like the same

as like Harrison Ford just doing Indiana Jones 5 when he's 80? I think it's like Jerry Rice putting up like an 1100 yard season at like 41 years old for the Raiders just because he can. Is it different for musicians

than it is for actors? Because like some actors like when Robert De Niro's in like some stupid comments, with like Andy Sandberg and you're like, De Niro, what are we doing here? You're in Nottie Boy or whatever that movie was? Like, he was in some ridiculous comedy with like Zach Ephron.

I remember that. Dirty Grandpa, I think it was called. Did you see that? No, I didn't see that. Is there a musical version of that or no? Do you just keep playing the hits until you're 90? It's not, you're not mailing them. That's a good question because...

Well, they always have the hits, though. You know, they could always play those at that concert. But like Harrison Ford doing Indiana Jones 5. People, I feel like, malign that, but they don't malign Elton John going on tour. Yeah. It's because the product is worse. Like Elton John is singing the same great songs, even if he sounds a little worse.

Indiana Jones 5 is going to be bad. Every time you mention Harrison Ford, I just think of all the times he's been like gotten in trouble for like flying his plane. Like he landed on like the place where you taxi or airplane. Like he actually did crash his airplane, which is scary as fun. I think he thinks he is Indiana Jones. That's the problem. Like get him out of the sky, man. We cannot have Han Solo be the freaking pilot anymore.

And he's the one who. in a movie with get off my plane. It's like, buddy, I can tell her the odds of, if you keep flying, I can tell the odds of you surviving are not that high. Like, Harrison, chill. You're so rich. Chill out. Just hang out.

All right, goodbye to me. But not you, Harrison, Ford.