The Ringer NFL Show - Week 16 Awards

Episode Date: December 27, 2021

We recap the Week 16 slate by giving out brand new awards like The Dominate the Consolation Bracket Award, The Dominating the Toilet Bowl Award, The “Ned Stark” Award, The Sad Tissues or Happy Tissues Award, and more. Email us at [e-mail]. Hosts: Danny Heifetz, Danny Kelly, and Craig Horlbeck Producers: Craig Horlbeck and Mike Wargon Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What's up, everybody. I'm JJ John D. Stramski. And I'm Jason Gough, and if you haven't heard, the ringer has gone local. I'm bringing the fire. I'm bringing the rain from the Big Apple with my show, New York, New York. And I'm reping Shy Town with my new show The Full Go on All Things Chicago. We've got episodes three nights a week with all the reaction to the local teams and guests. Plus bonus episodes around all the big games and storylines.

So whether you're uptown, downtown, downtown, in the burbs, or a transplant. Make sure you follow New York, New York, and the full go on Spotify or wherever you get your podcast. Welcome to the Ringer Fantasy Football Show. My name is Danny Heifitz. I am here with Danny Kelly and Craig Horlebeck. Christmas is over. Week 16 is almost over. The fantasy semis are almost over.

Hopefully you're not waiting on any Saints or Dolphins. It is almost time for the fantasy championships. We're giving out awards. We're getting right into it. D.K., kick us off. Yeah. All right. So last week, you may remember the Bengals freaking ghosted everyone.

T. Higgins, Jamar Chase, even Joe Burrow, to an extent Joe Mixen, this week, and I'm giving this award, I'm calling this award,

the Dominate the Consolation Bracket Award, because it probably came a little bit late, but the Bengals just went ham, hard as a motherfucker this week. Wow. What about all the children?

Sorry for this one. Starting off explicit and minute in. They went freaking ham, you guys. T. Higgins, let's start off T. Higgins, let's start off T. Higgins, because he just,

I mean, this was a career day, 13 targets, 12 catches, 194 yards, two touchdowns, 43 points in PPR. This follows up a four-point performance from week 15. What week are we in?

16. 10x in a week is like an alt-coin. That's decent. Yeah, seriously. Yeah. If we want to give him a subcategory, I was going to give him the, that's not even why I drafted you,

but wow, thank you, award. He didn't have to do that. You made a whole wheel of cheese. Wow, I'm impressed. T, I just need like 12 to 15 out of you. I don't need 40. I don't have it in front of me, but I feel like he had 30 points in the first half, too.

This was one of those games where he was just like, okay, everything that happened after the half was like, okay, enough. Like, he's already dead. Like, stop doing this. You know that point in fantasy where you know in your head what you want your player to get and when he gets it, you're like, oh, this is great. He got 20?

Everything else is gravy. And then it just keeps coming. And then he got another 20. Playing with house money. Joe Burrow did that too. I was like, oh, wow, Joe Burrow. that's cool 250 yards

three touchdowns and then he like did that again yeah Joe Burrow he finished with 525 yards four touchdowns

38 points in fantasy last week 13 points so obviously that was a good good little

like mushroom power up type move uh wait can I give you wait hold up wait can we stay in Burrow for a second yeah yeah

we have to linger here so most passing yards in Bengals history this was the fourth most passing yards in NFL history like 525 is the fourth most passing arts

in a single game in the history of the NFL. Love it. Can you name the three people who've had more passing yards in a game than Joe Burrow? Oh, God. No, but Ben has cracked 500 twice somehow. He had like two fewer yards, like last year or something. A lot of modern quarterbacks,

like quarterbacks who are playing now have hit 500, but none of them actually really have cracked. Drew Breeze? Breeze has done it two or three times, but not beaten 525. Brady? Brady's done it, but between 500 and 525. All the active quarterbacks who've done it. Like Matt Ryan's done it.

Jack has done it, but between 500 and 525. Like, all your guesses are going to be between under 525. Is it, are these obvious or are they like? They're the least obvious things I've ever seen. Is it like Randall Cunningham or some random stuff? So the guy you did it, if you ever played Madden, you would have beaten this. You know this as you played Madden because your guy will break the record and you check the record. But Norm Van Brockland did it like 70 years ago.

Okay. Okay. Warren Moon. Do you know the other person? You'll never, you're going to shit your phone. Obviously, we don't. Matt shop. Oh my God.

Matt shop. Wow. If it's sitting here listening to us play the hits, like Tom Brady, Drew Brees. I know. Just letting us do it. But the other thing, but I wanted to note that because that's crazy. Also, this is the most passing yards Joe Burroughs ever thrown in a game. Like, including LSU, including high school.

Remember that game where he had eight touchdowns against Oklahoma? He did not have as many yards in that game as he did in this game. Like this 525 against the NFL. I know the Ravens are banged up, but like, I think that's insane. And I just want to say that to highlight the Rams playing the Ravens next week with the secondary, holy crap. Ooh, that's going to be fun.

I think that's a great stat, by the way, I have a say he's never thrown for more than this in his entire life. Like, he had, he was on a team where his top of receivers were Justin Jefferson and Jamar Chase. Like, picture that. It's running back in college. With Clyde, the words, Hilaire there and Terrace Marshall, right? Yeah, and Terris Marshall was the second.

Justin Jefferson, meanwhile, is going to become maybe the player with the most receiving yards under 23 ever. Also, speaking of 23, there are so many numbers from this game. T. Higgins and Jemar Chase went over 1,000 yards. They were the first teammates in NFL history both at 1,000 yards before turning 23 years old. Wow. Oh, wow. Yeah, they're going to be good for a really long time. T. Higgins, I think, is really underrated already.

He actually is almost having the same year as Chase at this point, because T. Higgins, has missed two games, Chase hasn't missed any. They're both pretty much averaging 75 yards a game. Higgins is interesting. He and C.D. Lamb, I think, are both in the unique body style category. Like, T. Higgins is really tall and really skinny. I'd say CD Lamb is kind of in that...

Yeah, Higgins. I think... Skinny isn't maybe the right word. He looks big because he wears 85, and he looks like a tight end because he's the only receiver wears 85 anymore. And Tyler Boy does, too. tall for a guy that tall to be able to run that precise of routes and shake guys like that,

I think it's really impressive. I don't know. Higgins is just really awesome. The Bengals went absolutely ham today, as I said. And I don't know, hopefully that won you, your consolation bracket. If you're going for fifth place, congrats. You got it. Son of a bitch.

I am going for fifth place because of him this week. Never wrong just early on all the Bengals. Oh, my God. All right. Well, if the Bengals are going to help you get fifth place, I'm going to give another word out here to someone who's going to help you avoid last place, which is AJ Brown, who's helping you dominate the toilet bowl. If you're in your little concert, if you're like trying not to come in last,

AJ Brown really helped you because he literally had not played since, was it, week 11? And also, if you drafted him as one of your top receivers, your team probably wasn't very good. It's a miserable year for you. So sorry. Yeah. I, he was activated off injured reserve for Thursdays and football. Season high 16 targets.

Season high 11 catches. 145 yards in a touchdown is like 30 plus ppr points. This is the dream, you guys. Just give him 16 targets every week. I don't even care. Like force feed him the ball. You know what I realized during this? There's a thousand things about this.

But the Titans are five and one with Julio and Julio and Hulio and A.G. Brown together. And that Julio, A.J. Brown and Derek Henry could be back for the playoffs? Oh, wow. Can you imagine if the Titans actually have all three of them in the playoffs? Anyway, I just A.J. Brown coming back was hilarious. I feel like, so you know that, you know that drawing where it's like the two dragons than the third dragon is like sticking its tongue out and it's like yes oh yeah like the fact that you're adding Julio Jones into this category like almost makes me want

to reference that because like Julio Jones has done nothing it's such a better name why are you including Julio Jones in this group there it's really just AJ Brown and Derek Henry who he was a fringe guy at this point uh well speaking of dragon I'm doing another word which is people dragging you to your championship oh that's maybe your best segue of all time. The Cooper Cup of Segways. Cooper Cup. Cooper Cup.

It's really smooth. You didn't even really like lean into that. I'm actually proud of you. I'm grown up. Humble. You got humble. Can I talk about Cooper Cup guys? Yeah.

Okay. I'm ready to marveling over your pun. Yeah. I'm not quite ready. Let's talk about it for a little longer. Let's linger. Let's linger on this. Let's linger on this.

Let's sit here for a month. Cooper Cup had his second worst game of the last two months. basically his second worst game of the half of the season, except the second worst game of this half of the season for him is 10 catches for 109 yards. Cooper Cup is freaking incredible. Cooper Cup is the first player in NFL history with 90 yards in 14 different games,

which is astonishing. Incredible consistency in addition to just massive, massive numbers. He leads the league, obviously, like receiving yards and catches and touchdowns. Craig and I were talking earlier today. I want to go through this actually. basically like I kind of want to walk through the math here of like how close he is to breaking the

catches record and like flirting with the receiving yards record and I know it's like an 18 game season here's the thing forget the 18th game like throw it out let's pretend the 18th week's not happening he has another week Cooper Cup has a hundred and thirty two catches that's already fifth he's fifth ever he is like with two games left forget the 18th game he has five more catches away from third. Yeah. Holy cow. He's almost definitely not going to break Michael Thomas's record. He's 17 away. He could do it in the 17th game. He'll need the 18th game. He firstly

could have the record. He'll need the 18th game to break Michael Thomas. But he only needs 11 catches to beat Marvin Harrison for number two all time. But the fact he's already, like the point is he's already there. That's the point. Like he's the only people ahead of him are Michael Thomas a couple years ago. Marvin Harrison 02. Antonio Brown five years going into or six years going at Holy Jones six years ago. Those are the only people with more catches in a season than Cooper Cup has right now with a game to go. That's crazy.

He feels like Larry Fitzgerald level of sure-handed. We should give out, there should be NFL gold glove awards. They should do that. Wow. That is good. Yeah. There's, I do think that there's like three things the NFL needs to steal for baseball. They need to steal errors.

Except the opposite. Like there are earned runs. Yeah. They're earned runs in baseball. We need earned passing yards, like a screen for 10 yards. And then like, you know, when Tyree Kill breaks like three tackles to get 80 yards for a touchdown, like Patrick Mums doesn't earn those 80 yards. Totally agree. And then also like if you, you know, if you're trying to throw a pass and somebody

at the line of scrimmage tips in it, no, your receiver tips in the air and it's a perfect pass. Shouldn't count as an interception. Yeah, we need to go towards your ERA. And they're like, oh, who's going to do that? The scorer, like baseball has. No one complains. Any higher that guy.

I just get that guy. I mean, it's like a how many billion dollar industry? Like, we'll figure. it out. I think we can do that. We could find kids in 10 minutes who would do that. Except if, but that would require someone watching every NFL game. How are we going to do that? Anyway, we really need errors. But the point is we also need gold gloves. But not just the catches though, we know I hate PPR. I also want to show out the receiving yards thing. Cooper Cup already has 1,700 receiving yards. Like that's already the most in six yards in six

years, he needs like 80 yards. 80's pretty fine for him. And again, just next week, forget week 18. If he gets 80 yards, he'll have the fifth most receiving yards ever in a single season. He's only going to be the fifth receiver to break 1,800 with 80 more. 120 next week. He'll have the third most. It'll be Calvin Johnson, Julio, and the Cooper Cup. He'll be Jerry Rice. He'll go, he'll move past Jerry Rice from night. And then if he gets the two weeks, he'll probably, he could get to 2,000 receiving yards. It's possible. This is crazy. How close is he to breaking the fantasy record for most points by a wide receiver.

He's got to be hanging around there. I didn't check that one. I can't believe to check that. You know, it's funny though. You're right, though. Because Calvin Johnson, the year he had that record

with the yardage, had like five touchdowns. And Cooper Cup is like 15 or 14. Can we also mention that Matt Stafford is a connecting tissue here? Oh, shit. You're right.

I'm just terrible today. It's seven points. Anyway, he was a big huge dud this week, but overall this season, he's been awesome. All right. I'll end my rant on Cooper Cup, but I just want to say this, like, legit is one of the best receiving seasons of our lifetime. So it's pretty crazy? Wasn't it Devante Adams, like last year or no, two years ago who set the all-time record for fantasy points by a wide receiver? All right. You know what, D.K, I'm going to throw to you for the next person.

I'm going to look all this up as we go here. All right. I don't know off the top of my head, to be honest. All right, the other person I want to put in this category, and again, going back to Hyfitz's pun, dragging you, dragging you to the championship award. Mark Andrews from the Ravens absolutely just went off again today. The last three weeks, he's now scored 27 points, 36 points, 29 points. He has 29 receptions, 3706 yards and four touchdowns in that stretch. It hasn't mattered who the quarterback has been over the last three weeks. or sorry, the last four,

three or four weeks. And he's just been really, really consistent, big time gamer. And for people that had him, like he's... Big time gamer. The type of, like,

the distance between him and like all the other tight ends, it feels like, too, is just absolutely absurd. Maybe, like, Kelsey didn't play this week, but Kelsey was close last week.

But like, other than that, like, he's just been lapping to feel that tight end. Well, I mean, what's crazy is he had more, Mark,

Mark, Andrews has more fantasy points this week than like, George Kittle, Gronk. Dawson Knox, Hunter Henry, like combined. And that doesn't include Travis, Kelsey, Darren Waller, and Tadja Hawkinson not playing. I mean, tight end is waste land. And Mark Andrews literally is better than just about everyone at the position you even consider starting other than Kyle Pits combined.

He's been good. I wonder, I'll be curious to see, like, what percentage of teams that win every, like, win at all this year have Mark Andrews on their team. Because like, obviously we talk about that, the percentage of like playoff teams that have X player or whatever. Mark Andrews does feel like a legit league winner. I found up the Cooper Cup stats. Holy cow. All right. This is wild.

So he had, I'm looking at PPR right now. And this is every receiver ever in NFL history despite PPR points. Cooper Cup had 20 today, right? 109 plus 10. So he had 21 points basically. So Cooper Cup, with one week to go. Is he already in first? is in second.

Jerry Rice 95 is number one with 414. Now, we're including 16 games here, which usually kind of week 17, whatever, like we got to, just including the full season. He's already in second place with a game to go with 390.

So if you were to get 24 points next week, he would have the most ever in his 16 game span. Wow. That's crazy. And to be clear, he's already passed 07 Randy Moss, already passed 02 Marvin Harrison, already passed 2019 Michael Thomas

and already passed all of Antonio Browns-Bus seasons. Yeah, so it's an all-time season, in other words. It feels like it, and it actually is. Yeah, that's insane. Okay, not quite an all-time

waiver ad for the playoffs. Justin Jackson today. Yeah. He went off. So I was like expecting 60% ecular or whatever. You know, he was just like 100% ecular. He looked really good. Justin Jackson did.

11 rushes, 64-yard. two touchdowns. He added eight catches for 98 yards, 34 ppr points. He paced the chargers in receiving yards and rushing yards. Like he was their offense today. Yeah, and we thought that they were just going to kill Houston and run them all the time. It turns out that didn't really happen, but it still worked out. I mean, it's actually probably better for him that they didn't because then he got all those receiving yards. And so, yeah, I mean, Justin Jackson, big time ad. I'm glad that we were pushing him this morning on the green room because he really,

really delivered. And I don't know. It might just be one of those one-week things because Echler could come back for next week. I didn't get to see a ton of escape. How did the Chargers lose to the Texans? Like I saw Herbert a couple of bad picks, but what happened?

Davis Mills. The Texans are better than... You can't explain Davis Mills. The only thing I ever think about the Texans is any time they're beating a team like the Chargers, it cuts to Lovie Smith with his like Santa Claus beard on the side. And I'm like, oh, right. Yeah, he's doing that.

Here's how they won. Rex Burkhead, you guys. Oh my God. Talk about the weird flex, but okay. Rex Burkhead is the running back three today. Yeah, we're doing the fabulous award, right? F-A-A-A-B. The thing about Rex is he ain't on this list because nobody picked him up.

No one's starting Rex Burkhead this week. And unfortunately, he was like the RB3, which usually happens every once in a while, miserable that it happens in the semifinals of fantasy playoffs. Can you imagine if you lost your fantasy semis to the guy, picked up Rex Burkhead. Well, what sucks is if you do have Rex Burkhead, he's probably just sitting on your bench,

and that's even a worse feeling. When you're like, ah, I started Sequin. Yeah, idiot. You started Sequin over Rex Perkin. What a loser. This is the one fatal flaw, though, fantasy. Wouldn't you say the free agent, random pickup in week 16,

and it wins you your week, and now you're under the Fantasy Championship when you're playing the guy who drafted smart, his guys have been healthy all year. He did the right thing, and then a couple of his guys get COVID. you're the shitty friend you're playing picks up Justin Jackson and now he's in the championship.

That's the one flaw of fantasy. Let's be real. The wrong teams are winning this year. 100%. Like I am in the championship. I'm in a championship this year with the team that I basically started almost wholly of people I picked up off of waivers. Like I don't know what, maybe like waivers should only get half of the points they actually score. Because it's just not fair.

What are we to talk about for this season? So here's the deal. I don't think we're going to have to... The thing is, though, we won't have to worry about this every year because this is certainly a very unique season with the COVID outbreaks that have been happening. Obviously, this is... And the amount of guys, the amount of players

that have gone on the COVID list over the last week, week, two weeks is way actually higher than it was last year, even with this Amokron variant. So, you know, hopefully we won't have to deal with this again next year. You know, obviously can't see the future. but I do think this is a outlier season in that sense because look, typically injuries make for a lot of variants in the playoffs.

There's always a lot of playoff variance. The best team doesn't always win. When you go into your league's playoffs, you have like a worse, you have a bad chance of winning, honestly. I get what you're saying, but the NFL. But like this year especially, man. I get what you're saying because the NFL has decided

to treat COVID like an injury. The problem is this year the injuries are contagious and that's not normal. And so we have to have this conversation. Eventually we're going to do it right now because this week was crazy. We're talking about Rex Perkins that are running back three and like Justin Jackson's replacing Echler. Travis Kelsey isn't playing. Is there an asterisk if you win this year?

Like we have to talk about this. Like if you win your league, it's because of your grit and your determination and you persevered whenever else could not. If you lost, you kind of put an asterisk in this season. I think you could you could put an asterisk in like your your ego. no like if you win no you're not doing that but everyone else is putting it like in real sports i actually think the champion the covid championships are more impressive like the NBA bubble and like all those things i think they're more impressive the fantasy ones are like undeniably less impressive to me i mean like half your team and weed 16 is like a bunch of randos you picked up

last week and now you're in the championships it's not how it should be this is wrong it's weird it's Weird, man. And, like, I'm benefiting for, like, it's just, we have to, I don't know, we just, it's, we have to be honest with ourselves. This is kind of messed up. Also, there's a lot of chicanery going on now because there's, the waiver wire is so important. And then a lot of guys who aren't in the playoffs are still adding guys because they don't want to, they want to, like, you know, affect the playoff team. So they're just like randomly adding Justin Jackson when they don't have to. Trying to fuck people over.

Yeah, just a lot more chicanery. Sounds like a personal problem, Craig. You wanted Justin Jackson and someone else got them. Yeah. Craig's called shenanigans. Burrough screwed me last week so it doesn't matter. I want to just shout out while we're talking about waiver ads that just shift the playoffs. Dude, the Cowboys defense.

We're recording this in the middle of the Cowboys-Wash-in game. We were like, honestly, fuck this game. We're going to start recording. It was like, we decided that when it was like 42 to 7. Now it's 56 or whatever. I stopped checking the score. The game is over. It was 56 to 14.

Goodness. That's so sad. Dak had 320 yards and four touchdowns at half, I think. That's crazy. I put it this way with the Cowboys Washington game. The Washington defensive tackles or the defensive lineman got in a fight argument because they gave up too many touchdowns and then gave up like two more touchdowns before halftime.

Can you imagine giving up two touchdowns after your argument about too many touchdowns? Those are college teammates and they threw a punch. Oh, dude, you spend that much time with anyone from college. If you spend that much time with your like your college roommate, And then you go and work with them, like, for like, come on, something's going to happen. Yeah, right. You can't work with somebody you also are friends with. Doesn't work like that.

That's why none of us are friends. It works out really well. Anyway, Cowboys D, number one defense this week. Number two, depending on your scoring, but, well, no, this week is number one. Number two last week. Number two, the week before that, number three, the week before that. They're literally our top three defense each week in December. Not only that, I'd like to look up, I should have, I just thought of this now,

but I just want to look up how they did just overall against any position in the last four weeks. I bet you they're just, they're like Alvin Camara, Cooper Cup in the last four weeks. Seriously. They're averaging like 20 a game. Are you going to do that? It's actually really funny to look up. Let me give it a shot here. Do they include defenses, though?

I don't know if they do. I'm doing all, but I think all is only offense. Well, I can do this quick. We have the technology. I'm going to let you know right now that this is possible. We have technology. That's a SpongeBob. How did you remember that episode?

Yeah. And they bang the computer on the piece of paper. Oh, I can tell you right now. The Cowboys, like not counting this week were, wow. Not counting this week, Dallas was like the 15th player. But now that if you, but that includes like Rathusburgers ahead of them. And Jonathan Taylor, wow. So you give them 20 points.

They passed Rathusberger. They passed Taylor. They passed Tassam Hill. Oh my God. They passed Kittle. So borderline. top 10 player. No, holy shit. They passed a lot of people.

One, two, three, four. This is riveting. They're a top 10, maybe. They're probably like a top 11 player over the last four weeks. The Cowboys defense. That seems to always happen too every year in fantasy. There's one guy who gets real lucky with the defense that just rips off four back to back, 20-point runs. Yeah, I think so. That's, that's, that's, anyway, the Cowboys defense has just has been insane. Speaking of like the opposite of this, which is, was one thing to get. or go against the guy who just picked up Justin Jackson and the Cowboys D

and just those two people dropped like 65 points in you. But then if you have like James Robinson who gets one point and then gets an Achilles injury and then boom, they're gone. It's the first quarter. You have to go like 45 minutes with no chance that they're coming back. No chance. They're out, out 53 minutes. It's like the Ned Stark Award.

It's like that's Ned Stark. Like I thought we were going to be together for a while here. get attached. Way too much time on my hands, like, and you're just not coming back. Like, 50,

I have 51 minutes left in this game with James Robinson just not going to move from that 1.0. Yeah, there's probably nothing worse in fantasy than your guy getting hurt in the first quarter.

Can I ask you serious? Well, I just want to throw also, Miles Sanders had like another kind of branch of this where he had five points and left, but James Robinson was worse. Here's my question,

and I mean this earnestly. If they can sub in a real life football, why can't we sub in fantasy football? It's an interesting question. Because here's my real answer. Like, I know people are going to jump down my throat and go, here's the real answer. When Bill Simmons and all the olds

started playing fantasy football like 35 years ago, that was not possible because they mailed each other their freaking rosters. You did it over the mail and then you add up the box scores the next day. Yeah, but just because it wasn't possible, doesn't mean that's what they wanted to do. That's my point.

It's like that's how it was. But now that we're in this evolved game, if James Robbins gets hurt, does it really make sense that you're not allowed to sub him out? Well, aren't you just describing bestball? Yeah. No, it's not quite.

It's pretty much, though. No, but there has to be a mechanism. You want to add his points together with the backup? I don't know. I don't know the system. I'm not at all pretending to have this totally flushed out. It sounds like an off-season episode for us. We have to figure this out. I would say so.

Email us at Ringer Fan. Fantasy Football at Gmail.com, if you have a solution to this, whether funny or serious, but there has to be some way that you can let, like it's stupid, quite honestly,

that the real Jaguars can sub in for James Robinson and your fantasy football team cannot. It's kind of stupid. I mean, it's not a terrible idea that, you know, if your player actually gets ruled out

for the game, that should be allowed. Yes, then you should be able to sub somebody in at the same position. Maybe it's not terrible idea. Let's hit up Yahoo. Yeah, okay.

Email so ringer fantasy football at gmail. com, if you've an idea for that. Remember, the idea has the scale. Okay. But yeah, Ned Stark, James Robinson. Sorry about that. Okay.

Staying in the same vein of Game of Thrones here. My next award is called the Game of Thrones Season 8 award. And I'm giving this to Melvin Gordon and Javante Williams, the Denver running backs. So it was all going real smooth. First seven seasons. I did the last seven weeks of the season. They've been averaging 14 and 15 points a game. Week 15 and 16, playoff time, nut crunch time.

Three points per game for Melvin. for Giovante. They torched us. They screwed us. Especially Melvin. Melvin is the episode of season eight where the guy literally runs back from like beyond the wall in like the period of one episode or like even less than that. He like literally runs like 100 miles or whatever it is like saves everyone.

No, no, no. This is ridiculous. No, here we go. Here we go. He had zero yards today. Negative zero? Four rushing. Four receipts.

He had zero total yards. That's the coffee cup. The Starbucks cup they left in the studio. That's Melvin Gordon today. I forgot about that. Between the two of them today, they had eight rushing yards. That's crazy. The team had 18 and 10 of them were Drew Locke.

Couldn't have killed you more in the two most important weeks of the year. 15 points of gain, the last seven weeks. Speaking of that, you guys, I saw this stat. This is from Mike Clay. The Broncos had 40 offensive plays today. That's the fewest by any offense in a single game this season. It's tied

for the ninth fewest in any game since 2010. They ran 40 plays. That's like, probably, I would guess the Cowboys ran at least 40 plays in the first half in the game against Washington. Probably said 49 points in the second half in the first time. Forty nine points.

Can I give you another stat? That's crazy, actually. Can I give you another stat? This one's from ESPN. So he's from ESPN stats and info. Denver's ball carriers were hit at or behind the line of scrimmage on 13 of their 16 run plays.

That means basically the three of us could have accomplished the same thing as Melvin Gordon today. Well, you probably would have had more yards because we probably would not have lost negative 4 on the first one, and then we would have just gotten hurt on the first play.

Right. Yeah, one rush, zero yards, a couple broken ribs. No, no, I wouldn't get back to the line of scrimmage. I could get negative. I could lose two yards on a... Listen, I just want to say it right now. There's a hole.

I could get there, get a yard or two. There's a hole? Zero fucking chance. If there's a hole, I'm just running. No, you need a gaping hole. I don't think you have to set up a hole. I would tear my hamstring, like, you have to set.

Yeah, first of all, let me tell you something. I did a Peloton thing too hard today and like my foot hurts right by the balls of my feet because I was, oh my God. Oh, wow. Okay. I thought I had Planner fasciitis. And then I flashed back to when Tony Pollard had it. I thought it was Planner fascist.

And I was like, oh, man, what's with him? I don't think I said that on the pot. I think that was between us. Anyway, all right. Come up with a transition for this. I have no transition from plan or fascists. High Fitz and I did this last week, Fad. This is the Cal Mountain Jr.

You're wrecking my life award. And also, by the way, that's what Ricky Bobby says that. We have to explain this to Craig. Because remember the scene where last week when you were God, Craig. Remember the scene in Ricky Bobby? When Ricky Bobby comes home to Cal has his wife? and Cal has a kid and Cal is living in his house.

He's like, moved into his house. He's like, I've been gone for four hours. We were like, that was Duke Johnson with Miles Gasco. Like, Miles Gasca is this great game against the Jets set up. And then Duke Johnson has like, literally the best game of his career.

And we're like, you stole my laugh, Cal? You're wrecking my laugh. This is this week. So obviously, Duke Johnson's hand in over the torch here to Sony Michelle. And actually, Sony Michelle kind of did this before Duke Johnson. He's done it over the last like three,

three, four weeks. Sony Michelle is basically just taking over for Daryl Henderson. He has more or less while he pipped him at this point. Henderson did get hurt a little bit today, but before that, Sony Michelle was dominating carries. He was dominating snaps, all that. 27 carries, 131 yards, one touchdown, 20 points in PPR. And I think Michelle, from a fantasy football point of view, like he just,

sorry, from a real football point of view, he just brings like a different element. He is like a grinder. He's better as. what I think, you know, Sean McVeigh wants him to be, what's this wants his offense to be, where he can grind out yards, he can break tackles,

he can turn what should be like a one-yard loss into like a three-yard game kind of thing. Sean McVeigh's offense wants running backs to be better, and Sony's better. Yes. Sean McVeigh's offense wants...

He wants the most yards he can get. What a genius. Jesus. Just an offensive genius. He wants better players in his offense. When Craig went to McVeigh's house, that was like the grand thing he revealed. McVeigh was like,

you know what the secret is, more yards. How do you? you do it? Like, well, how do you really, really do it? He's like, you want to know the secret, Craig? He's like, yards. As many as you can get. We're fucking, we're fucking around and we're joking around, but like, coaches

playing their best players, I'm being like 100% serious is like an edge for a coach. Like, playing your best players is something that, like, the best coaches do. And the worst coaches actually don't. I'm not kidding. I'm not kidding. LeBardi said that all the time, like, sometimes some teams are a couple injuries away from a really good team. It's true. Dude, I'm not, I'm not, I'm being 100% serious.

Like, you can get an edge by actually playing your best players as a coach. Dude, the Giants were playing Nate Solder at left tackle for like months because they paid him money or what? It's kind of the same way in fantasy. Like, if you have Sequin Barclay every week and you have Tony Pollard on your bench, you're like, I'm not starting Tony Pollard. That's so true. It is like that in fantasy. And eventually you've got to be like, fuck it. Tony Pollar is bettered.

Like, what am I to do? Play Chase Edmonds over Seekone? you should. Anyway, Sony Michelle. Darry Henderson had one carry today. I know he got hurt, but like, this is Sony's job, but I think the interesting, the real Cal Norton, like, you're wrecking my life. All the, this happened.

This wasn't just Sony, though. It was like all the running backs who used to share, like, they all have to slingshot, shake and bake for someone else. And then they got to be number one. They're like, I like going fast. Like, Sony Michelle out Daryl Henderson. Devin Singletary, who is no longer sharing anything with Zach Morris and Matt Breda did it. Devin Singletary is good.

Damien Harris, without Romandre. Chase Edmonds without James Connor, Nick Chubb without Cream Hunt, Alex Madison, the Alvin Cook, all of those guys were like top 12 running backs. I mean, we're not breaking any ground by saying that giving one running back all the carries is better for fantasy.

But like, it did all happen in one week. It just was the theme that it just was like, if you look at the top 12, two thirds of it are guys that usually were splitting with someone and it did not have to this week. Yeah, I mean, the longest lasting theory in fantasy football, at least in the modern age,

just like running backs don't matter. It's like pretty true. It is true. Honestly, I hate to say this because Austin Echler is one of the more likable people in the entire league, including fantasy because he literally said pick up Justin Jackson. Yeah, he told us. Yeah.

Like Austin Neckler literally like said, told Dawson Knox on a video was like, hey, pick up Justin Jackson. And he was right. And that's actually the whole problem. Anyway. My God. I was gone for three hours, except the game's like three hours. He's calling him up.

It's Todd Gurley to C.J. Anderson. I reckon my laugh. Three hours. Oh, my God. Okay, wait, keeping up with this, I do want to mention Tyree Kill and Byron Pringle. Oh, my God. Okay, Tyree Kill, without Travis Kelsey, in the semifinals of the fantasy playoffs, going up against Pittsburgh, who's been getting torched, puts up 2.9 points.

Pringle has 75 yards in a touchdown. McCle Hardman has a touchdown. Tyree Kill, I went back and looked, had the single worst fantasy game of his entire career where he started a game and played the full game without getting hurt. The single worst game of his career. He's serious? Yep, as a starter. 2.9. Just ruined it. Just ruined it.

You know what the funny thing about this game is other than the Steelers having, I would say the worst, I thought it was the first worst half of the 20 years. I'm in Pittsburgh right now. I'm doing this for Christmas. I'm in Pittsburgh for the Christmas time and I asked, like, is this the worst first half of like your lifetime

for the Steelers? And they were like, No, do you remember like a month ago when they tied the lines? Also, this feels like, also, how about the playoffs last year against the Browns? Yeah, exactly. Oh, yeah, actually, yeah, that one too. Wow, the Steelers just suck. But other than that, the funny thing about this Chief Steelers game was, I feel like we have all been waiting for some combo of Byron Pringle to Marcus Robinson,

meekle Hardman to do like anything in a game together. Not like two catches for 80 yards and a touchdown. Like, actually have a game. And we'd all just been like, well, that'll never happen. And then they finally did. I was, when I was watching that game, I was like, obviously, you know, in the fantasy community, I think everyone's wanted Nicole Hardman to be a thing ever since he was drafting the second round.

Like, and he caught a pass and he took off. And I was like, this guy's acceleration is like 0.01. Like, he's like the 99th percentile accelerator in the world, probably. And I'm just like, this guy's so fast. I completely kind of get why the chiefs took him so high. it just it doesn't help that he's like generally not a very good receiver like he's just too raw or whatever and so maybe that's never going to happen but like I do I did find myself thinking like God I'm still sort of like hooked on like the what if what could be with me Cole Hardman I'm not going to lie I still shout out hated winks at underdog who suggested this I still for the life of me don't know why the chiefs couldn't throw a fifth rounder the jets for James and Crowder because Jamesing like that's what they made sense they have all these fast people built for this offense that's big plays. And once these defenses limit the chiefs to these dink and dunk plays,

they don't have the personnel anymore to do these underneath things. They need someone like a crowder to like get open immediately. Like Steelers at Deontay Johnson, except if Rothesburg or weren't like a walking corpse. But anyway, that's neither here nor there. Hill having the worst game of his career that he finished is pretty wild.

So, especially the kids say, don't the kids in Talldegan Heights go two Christmases! I love the way my kids are talking to you, Chip. Throwing more medals off the bridge. I love the way my kids are talking to you. Next category here. Next award.

This is called Are Those Sad Tissues or Happy Tissues Award? This is from forgetting Sarah Marshall. This is for Sequin Barclay. So listen, the reason why I'm assigning it this quote from this movie is you might be sad because you likely didn't make the playoffs. if you did, you certainly lost this week if you have Sequin on your team. So you may be sad, but you know what? They should be happy tissues because it's over.

It's finally over. You never have to go through this again, okay? This is the final year. Go on a vacation. Forget Sarah Marshall. Forget Sequin Barclay. Like, we're done. I don't think there were many happy tissues in that movie.

So want to throw that out. That's true. Well, you know, finished happy. So to speak. It just never again, you know? I think we're done. If, you know, it's reportedly Joe Judge and Daniel Jones are coming back next year. It's just, it's over.

Find a new show. I got to admit, I'm like, I'm pretty sad about Sequin Barclay still. I got to admit it. Dude, Seek-Wan, okay. I know that I was like really wrong about Mike Davis. Can I just like get one, one bone here for being right on Seqwan? I flagellate myself every week about Mike Davis. Sequin was like a disaster.

And it's awful. Like his career has been a disaster. The Giants are disaster. Everything about this is awful. And here's the thing. It's easy to blame Gettleman. It's easy to blame the Giants. We're doing that.

They hired Jason Garrett. This franchise is pathetic. They are genuinely one of the three worst teams in the entire NFL every week. I actually don't think they'd be favored against any team in the NFL the rest of the season. They might be the worst team in the league. You're 100% right. I think they are because even the lions of the Jaguars like, Like Mike Glenn and Jake Farm Giants are not being favored.

Even against the Jaguars, having said that, I'm not going to, I'm not going to. Just Sequins disappointed. I'm not going to, I'm going to go into a whole brain right now. Can I read to you guys the Sequin experience? This has been his year. I'm going to read little notes from his year. Six games with eight or less points.

Five games missed due to injury. Three games with 17 or more. That is exactly who Seekwin is on this giant scene. He's like the damn Christmas Carol song. The four shitty weeks, three weeks, hurt two decent games. Like that is Sequin Barclan. Sequin has been outplayed by Devante Booker.

This year, he's been outplayed by Wayne Goulman two years ago, like last year. And like here's the reality. For what, like, Sequan, he's a three true outcome player. He's like Joey Gallo. He just home runs, strikeouts, and walks. And he has no home runs after that. Not even the ACL.

He has not hit home runs since his high ankle sprain two years ago. He doesn't hit. There are no 40-yard. runs anymore from Sequin. And he does, he's like a home run hitter without power. He just walks and strike out and every ball gets caught at the warning track. And he's just not a great player anymore. And if he goes to another team and if he finds like the Saints or someone, it goes

somewhere else and he's incredible good for him. He's just not a good giant right now. He's a great giant, but he's not a good player. This team sucks. And in fantasy, he has been one of the most disappointing players in recent memory. Don't you guys think that the last few weeks of a fantasy season decided? how you think about a player going into next season? 100%. You have that recency bias that sits with you.

Sequin the last two weeks has seven and three points. Ruined your year. No one who has him this year is going to have any interest in getting him next year. He's going to be like a fourth or fifth rounder. I don't know what it's going to be. Here's the thing. This is the real award for him. I think we got to put Sequin in the Burnbook.

You're right. You have to. Did he have three points there or four in the playoffs? Three points against the Eagles. And it's seven the week before. I mean, I think he has to go in the Burnbook. Like I know it's like Mike Lennon, it's from whatever There's a lot of other players playing with shitty people

Who are doing just fine He's being outplayed by other people in his team Like multiple other people Yes I wish I wasn't wearing this fucking shirt That's how every Sacon owner feels I mean I wish I wasn't starting this fucking running back

Should we just read the list of running backs We had more points than Sequin today No it's like gonna be 50 people No no no like the ones who like you know which ones I'm talking about. Oh, like the randos? Yeah, the randos. The most, read the most random ones that had more points in sync.

Oh my God. Mirabdala. Oh, my God. Mierbdox. Brandon Bolden. Oh, my God. Jamichael Hasty. Oh, my God.

Elijah Penny, who's the Giants fullback? Come on. Are you serious? Kyle Eusecheck. Who's the Niners fullback? Craig Reynolds. God damn it. Devante Booker.

Craig Reynolds. Craig Reynolds, who hosts this podcast. and then the worst one of all, Mike Davis. Yes, I was actually going to ask you that, Hyphitz, while you were talking, I was like,

Mike Davis might have scored more points than Seekwon over the last month. He did, man. Oh, my God. Oh, like, anyway, okay, Sequon's in the bird book. One note about Mike Davis and Sequin. Mike Davis, I know he's been healthier than Sequin,

but he only has eight less points than him this year. Jesus. That's how bad Sequins, but... It makes me sad. It makes me very sad. I, I, I, that's the most, that's the most, God. Which one of us three is going to zag next year and talk themselves into Sequin?

Because it's going to be me. It's going to be me for sure. I already, I can already tell you. You know why? Because D.K. is a draft guy. And the draft guys watch the college tape and then don't forget to watch them in the freaking NFL. Yeah.

And I've watched. Well, I don't forget to watch them. I'm just, I just think the Giants are shitty. I have watched Wade on. No, while we're here, we're joking. about the real issue is Sequin DK, in one sentence, why is Sequin like this generational

prospect? Rare athleticism, rare explosion. He's big and he's fast and agile, right? Right. He's everything. He doesn't play big. That's the real thing. Like he doesn't do what Zeeke does, which is Zique.

Muscles up and just hits you. He doesn't lower his shoulder to get five yards, like ever. Like up the middle, the dirty run. If there's a chance to bounce the run, he does. He doesn't just take the three yards and be like, I want something positive. And the Giants line being bad, like, exacerbates that because he's like, oh, I got to hit home runs because we need plays. But like he thinks like a quarterback, he's like a quarterback who's trying to throw like 60-yard touchdowns, but as a running back.

Or, you know, he's like a quarterback who never slide. But I bet you his entire life, he's been able to juke everybody and break off those runs. Exactly. It's like the running back version of what Josh Allen was, the first couple of. couple years where he's trying to do too much. Like that Texan's game in the playoffs, Josh Allen's like making all these crazy plays. It's like his whole life, his teams needed him to do this.

That's sake one. And as a rookie, it worked. That's why he does crazy stuff now. Same with Carson Wentz. What happened to Carson Wentz? That second year, third down,

he's doing all these crazy stuff. And it works. And they almost, and he's like going to win MVP. Terres his ACL. We don't talk about this. The emailer pointed out. Wentz loses some athleticism

with the ACL. and then also got lucky that year and then regresses and also has some injury. And then he did, but the mentality that got him there of do a lot all the time doesn't work and they don't know how to adjust.

You're doing too much. You're doing too much. Just do less. No, now you're not doing anything at all. It all comes back. Here's a question that. Do you think he can learn to just be like a more

of a north-south runner? Well, the problem is he probably needs coaching. Like, it's not like he's some lost cause. He's an awesome dude. Like, Giants fans love Sequin as a human being. It's just like Jason, Garrett was his freaking coach.

And like, Jason Garrett, what is his qualification? He inherited, like, he is the best offensive line. He had Zeke. He had Dak. He had Roma. Like, I don't think necessarily Saquan was getting the best coaching points. And also, he did have a terrible offensive line. So that was probably reinforcing his need to look for things.

I think if Sequin went somewhere else, he'd look incredible. My theory is that the Giants are going to be like the new Adam Gase team, where anybody that gets off the Giants is going to be, like, incredible. It's going to be awesome. Evan Ingram is going to go to some other team next year and put up a thousand years. They're all misused. No, you're right. Cadarius Tony's the best receiver in the league.

Like, look at what Ghaladay is done. Like, Goladay went from the Lions, and now he is literally like, he's had, I don't know, who catches a game or something like that. Like, it's been absolutely terrible. Our left tackle has more touchdowns than Kenny Gala. It's kind of like,

the thing that we're worse at is picturing what would have been if they went somewhere else. Like if Jonathan Taylor and Seekwon would switch, I think Seekwon would be really freaking good in Indianapolis. That's what the Giants did wrong in the nutshell. They chose Sequin and Will her, running back first round,

Will Hernandez in the second. They could have had Quentin Nelson in the first round and Nick Chubb in the second. What would you rather have? I'm going to jump off a bridge. Anyway, let's get to, now that I'm soul crushed, can we get to,

I'm not mad, just disappointed? Yeah. Which really in the semis, when you lose, it's like more of a soul crushing loss, right? It's not just disappointed. It's not only am I mad.

I'm soul-crushingly disappointed. I think generally the city of Los Angeles is known for soul-crushingness. I think Stafford and Herbert being bad this week. We're soul-crushing. Keenan Allen is bad, but really it's the charge of defense. Like we recommended them.

I threw the charges out. They had Texans, Davis-Mills, good match-up. They had negative points. The charges did negative points. This is up there. This is up there with like Tyree Kill getting 2.9. Especially if you were between the Chargers and the Eagles and the Eagles had like 18 or 13 whatever. It's basically an 18 point swing if you chose the Chargers over the Eagles. That's soul crushing.

There's something up with Houston, man. There's something up with this team. I'm not mad. They're the weirdest team in the league. I'm not mad at the Chargers. Actually, you know what I am mad? That's awful. Why did you do that?

Anyway, what happened to your umbrella? Got flipped turn upside down. God damn it. All right. I'm not mad at George Kittle. I know George Kittles is one of the best side of it. ends in the league, perhaps ever. But I'm soul-crushingly disappointed in his performance this week.

He played a little bit earlier. He played Thursdays when people might not remember. But he had 21 yards, 3.1 points. He's been averaging 17 a game since coming back from his injury, lighting the world on fire. And this week, guys named John Bates and Tommy Trembal outscored him. Tommy Trembal outscored him. You made up those names. I did.

I didn't. or did I didn't. No, those are real goddamn people. John Bates and Tommy Tremble. It sounds like kids I went to elementary school with. It's like Rugrats. Not Austin Hooper. A way to make fun of Tommy Pickles.

Yeah, so George Kittle and Tyreek are kind of up there in that elite category of just guys who totally disappointed you when it mattered the most. You know, hats off to you if you made it through the semis with this Kittle week. I need to issue an apology. I told some people to bench him on Ross St. Brown. I'm going to instead issue the Alan Robinson Memorial Quarterback Proof Award for Amon Ross St. Brown.

I was worried that Tim Boyle was quarterbacking for the Lions because he had, what, 77 yards the last time he started? I think it was a legitimate worry. It was a legitimate worry. Amon Ross St. Brown had 26 fantasy points today. I don't know how that works because Tim Boyle had like nine. Another reason people are stoned. But Amon Rang St.

Nine catches 91 yards in a touchdown. speaking, we were talking about the Cowboys over the last month. Here's Amman Rae St. Brown over last month. Here are the players who have, the receivers who have more fantasy points than Amon Rae St. Brown in last four weeks. It's Cooper Cup,

Devante Adams, and Justin Jefferson. Wow. Those are the only receivers who have more fantasy points than Amon Ra St. Brown. That's a great poll. Man. Legitimate league winner for Armandrisset, St. Brown. Like, when we say league winner, that's what we mean. You just pull a Devante Adams out of

your ass. Sometimes being kind of a half-ass fantasy football player actually works because the guy who just checks in the day before and he doesn't even know who's starting for the alliance probably started a Monro. He's like, oh, he's been good. I'm going to play him. Look, you had a lot that week. You'll lot that week a lot the week before. And then you got the guy who's listening to our show and everybody else's show and they're overthinking. And they're like, oh, it's Tim Boyle. I can't start a Monra. And of course, you got to stand. The other person's like, well, Tim Boyle sucks, but Jared Goff sucks too. So who cares. I mean, that's valid, actually.

Amon Ra. He's doing really well. For whatever reason, well, I know the reason. I was just thinking about the Bass Pro Shop in Memphis again. Yes. Yes. When we're getting a lot of tweets about that, you're doing. Well, there was a couple tweets that went viral or whatever that were, this is like

someone was talking about the skyline of Cairo or whatever. Like, I know that Cairo is big or whatever, but the fact they have two Bass Pro, Why do you have it's like the pyramids the real pyramids the real pyramids they say did I say Cairo right

Cairo I feel like I said it wrong You did a thing Anyway Ammanra I was speaking of Sun God St. Brown Is it going to be boring if I go back to football

stats from Monra because I actually want to throw two other things of you Yeah In the history of the Detroit Lions Players with eight catches and four consecutive games are Amonra St. Brown

and Calvin Johnson Come on Jesus That's awesome. Another one. Monastery St. Brown, four straight games with 14 and a half

PPR points. The rookie receivers who've done that, four straight games of 14 and a half PPR points. The only rookies who've done that in 10 years. Odell,

Brandon Ayuk, Justin Jefferson, AJ Brown, Stefan Deggs, Keenan Allen. It's a good list. That's a good group to be with. Like,

there's a lot of lists. Anyway, he's just crazy stuff. He's, I think he's like legit good. He is, he's outplaying his dress position. I think he was like a fourth rounder,

which was a bit of a surprise to people. But he's kind of got that, I don't know how to explain it. He's just like a physical good route around. He's almost like Cooper Cup. Like he's just big physical and catches everything. I mean, I'm not comparing him to Cooper Cup quite yet, obviously.

But like stylistically, I'm trying to figure out who he reminds me of. We need a stylistically, oh, man. Because he's not overly, big, but he's physical. Is it like an Edelman? He's, he's bigger.

But he can play outside. That's like one of the reasons that he's, that he's been so good over the last, like, however long, a month and a half or whatever, is that he's been playing outside too. Like, he started on the season. He was playing like 60% of snaps because he was only slot. And now they've just been, they've decided, well, he's a very good player. Again, this goes back to the edge coaches can have just by playing their best players. Now they're just like, well, we're going to play him outside also because he's very good

at everything. And he's better than I don't even God, I don't even know who the freaking other lions or receivers are at this

point. We also need a word for like when the announcers have a cliche about a guy, but the cliche is just a lovable story and like I don't want

people to make fun of it. The Amon Rock St. Brown cliche, which is astonishing is he took the SAT in three languages. Yeah, he's English,

German and French. His mother is German. And he took the SAT in all three? Yes. His mother's German. His dad was a Mr. Universe in the 1980s. Wow.

He went to French school growing up. So he speaks German and French fluently in addition to English. And his brother's name is equanimous. Also, by the way, his dad's name is John Brown, I believe. And I think maybe part of the reason that his kids all have really cool names is that he just didn't like the fact that his name was John Brown. And he just added the saint to his last name because he thought, sounded cool. I actually love that.

That's awesome. That is really cool. I'm all for people just like doing whatever they want with their names. That's fantastic. Spice it up. It's fake. Who cares? Well, all right. All right. Can we, I want to come all the way back around a DK back half. Remember how we all decided he was great and he's been great? And now this year he's only really, like

he's just back to running three routes and he's not that great. Like, it's weird that he doesn't have this full NFL route tree, right? Like, it's strange. Well, I think what you're saying, I think there's a I'm kind of, my initial reaction is like, okay, let's pump the brakes a little bit here. I'm just asking questions here.

I think you're right. I think you're, I'm just asking questions. Hyvich is getting hyperbolic here. I guess let me rephrase. It's never been explained to me how he just runs three routes and that's like, is that actually right, DK? He's still running just three routes? No, no, no. They've expanded, they've expanded his route tree quite a bit from where they started

because basically Hyvitz is right. When they first started out and when he played at Ole Miss, they were basically like, hey, run down the field on the left side and do that. because you're a 4-3 guy who's 230 pounds and you can beat anybody that way. But no, you're right. He is, I think, limited relative to some of the other elite receivers in the NFL right now in the sense that it's not like he's utilized all over the field on a vast, like, variety of different routes.

But also, by the way, that could be quarterback-related because Russell Wilson famously does not throw over the middle of the field. Like, if you look at his passing charts, like Russell Wilson just refuses to throw it to the middle of field. So part of that is like... Because he seems the easiest great receiver to completely eliminate from a game. But is that Russ's fault? Yes. Partly.

I think, but also I would say, well, look, it's symbiotic. Part of it is Russell Wilson stylistically, his skill set is not suited to like let D.K. Metcalfe do a whole bunch of stuff over the middle field. D.K. Metcalfe's skill set probably isn't that suited to do stuff over the middle field either. However, Russell Wilson's great. at deep balls down the sideline, which is what D.K. Mekhef is great at. So they make each other great in that area. And then their deficiencies or inefficiencies

or whatever in the middle of the field stuff, all that other stuff kind of compound on each other. So I think there's just, I mean, they're connected to each other. It's like any other receiver quarterback combination. Like, do we think Terry McLaurin is bad because he's having an off season? No, it's because this quarterback situation sucks.

This year with Russell and D.K. McHF., like, Wilson's in a terrible, slump of late. D.K. McCaff should have had probably two touchdowns last week. He probably should have had way more receiving years this week, but just like Wilson's been off, and their Seahawks offense has been terrible, and they've been running like the fewest amount of plays of any team in the NFL by a lot. So there's just all these other variables.

There's a gray area, High Fitz. Who's that you said earlier today that the Seahawks defense has essentially played almost four more games than the offense has played? Yeah. I think it was Brady. I think it was Brady Henderson from ESPN who pointed this out, like the disparity in plays between the Seahawks offense and defense is like dramatic. The Seahawks defense essentially, based on plays, has played like almost four more games

than the Seahawks offense this year. That is unforgivable. It's crazy. That's, I feel. The Seahawks to me, the Seahks are almost as frustrating as the Giants. Like, the Seahawks are bordering on the most annoying team. Our teams are all so bad. It's really true.

Like the Sealk Steelers and Giants are all so pathetic, but you know what the difference is is we think we're better than we are. Like the Jags, the Jets, they know. You know, we enter the season with an air of arrogance about us where we kind of assume, well, this will be the air,

oh, we'll be fine, we're always fine. But in reality, we're no, I'm no better than the Houston, Texas. The most humbling thing for me as Giants fan has been realizing that, yeah, we're on, we're, we're, we would be, we deserve to be underdogs against the lions. Like, that would be good.

you swap Daniel Jones for Davis Mills right now? Yeah, because I don't know if Daniel Jones... Is he playing football again or what, man? What is the... The Giants are lucky that they're so bad that this story went nowhere. But Daniel Jones is getting shut down for neck injury. Like, what? Sorry, what was that?

Yeah. Anyway. Yeah. As much as we hate our teams, you guys, like we hate... I hate the Seahawks. Highfidditch, you hate the Giants. Craig, you hate the Steelers. Like, the Jags are significantly worse.

The Jags are the worst team in it. in the NFL right now, and I don't think it's close. I just hate Ben for the one thing. That's fair. To be clear. I like everybody else. Craig loves Claypool, by the way. I do.

This is basically just the area of grievances. This was a festivist episode. It's just the area of grievances. I do like Claypool. I hate Claypool. I'm done with Claypool. I thought everybody went nuts. Everybody went nuts about him bragging after he like,

they were like in a time crunch and he got up and like did a little thing and everybody freaked out. Listen, I get it. He shouldn't have done that. No, no, no, no. That was bad. Yes, it was bad. It's not the worst thing in the world. He didn't, like, punch his teammate. It was the worst thing in the world. There's going to be a human rights council tribunal on this. It was a mental lapse and he made a dumb young mistake. Okay, it's like how, you know, Odell's like pissing on in the end zone and getting flags. Like, people do this shit all the time. They traded him after he did that. He burned one time. They asked him about that in the meeting.

How about Ben? They traded him after that. How about if Ben doesn't throw him six hospital balls a game, then he won't brag when he finally catches one without getting killed. No, he doesn't throw hospital balls. Claypool just can't catch a pass and then stay on his feet. He has to fall like an action movie. No, I'm team Claypool over Ben. I like Claypool.

Yeah, no, all right, no shit. We'd give away Ben. Ben paid the team $10 million to stay the quarterback. Essentially, he did. So then they kept Juju and then Juju sucked. He got hurt. No, he still sucked. all right.

This is the area of grievances. You want to go? DK, you have any grievances you want to air? No, that's it. I'm tired of it. D.K.'s good. I get aired at all.

Okay. Merry Festivus. Merry Christmas. Happy Kwanza. Thank you, D.K. Thank you, Craig. Thank you. Mike.

I was going to come up with other running backs, but yes, thank you, Mike Wargonne for producing this episode. Thank you, Mike Davis, for outscoring Sequin Barkley, just like I predicted in the preseason would happen. Thank you.

Thank you, Lord. Oh, okay. What you said? I said, thank you, T. Higgins. I figured to say, thank you, context. But yes, thank you, Lorne Michaels. Thank you, Flobots. How long of the streak are we on now

and having no idea who the hell he's talking about? I don't know. You guys, you guys know a few. We talked about Dallie Part, not that long ago. Yeah, no, he did, and he did another themed one the other day. That was like topical. Charlie Brown Christmas.

Whenever he doesn't do themed ones. When we talked about the eel sex, he did the electric light. Oh, and Mike chimes and Mike says last week he did Snoopy. Whenever Hafeits just goes, I mean, whenever D.K.

Just goes kind of stream of consciousness just picks a band from the recesses of his memory. I have no idea who that band is. Well, you know why it's because I think the D.K. I think the D.K. I think the D.K. really truly became comfortable sharing his music taste recently. And since then we've gotten, like, no joke, like, the Daryl Henderson workload.

Like, we've gotten one, one, Gary. Like a year and a half, like a year and a half ago, he was like trying to be mainstream. He's like, one of the kids to listen to the Arianna.

To you youngens. Yeah. You fucking zoomer. Ariana Venty Latte. He's like little oozy vert. You know what? I honestly, I have this thing where

I started, I wanted to like give bands that you guys would know because it's just easier to have that conversation. But also like, that's right. That's good podcast.

I was being like a little bit self-conscious that I was going to mispronounce someone's name and sound like a total fucking boom. I didn't want to do that. You're like, Bill Eilish. Yes, exactly.

Love that guy. Love that guy. Great musician. Great artist. Love that band. Bluegrass. Love it. Is that why you said Beyonce like three times?

I'm just telling you, I don't want to like sound like a boomer. He's like, ah, the beehive. Oh, my God. Wow. So who did you say that? The flowbots? The flowbots is like not even that. I pictured Fembots like Austin Powers.

You know that song, Handlebars? I can ride back by with no handle bars. Oh, that actually. You know that song. No. I think I don't know that. Yeah, you do. Is it on TikTok?

Otherwise, I don't know. Okay. The TikTok? We got to go back to the Sea Shanties. How did we not make the Seashanty some recurring thing this year somehow? I mean, we got, I feel like we got a good run out of the sea shanties. And we've moved on with our lives. Honestly, when the season's over, I'm going to have a C shanties pod.

All right. Yeah. Sure. Cool. Goodbye everyone.