The Ringer NFL Show - Week 16 Weather Disasters, Must-Starts, and Must-Benches

Episode Date: December 23, 2022

We kick off our NFL Week 16 preview by discussing what could be the worst weather weekend in NFL history, with windchill temperatures forecasted to drop below zero in multiple cities. We talk about the players you should think about benching because of the weather, and how you should handle the abundance of backup quarterbacks starting this week. We finish the show by answering listener emails. Check out our Week 16 Fantasy Football Rankings for this week's positional rankings, and more! Email us! [e-mail] Hosts: Danny Heifetz, Danny Kelly, and Craig Horlbeck Producers: Craig Horlbeck Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I'm Matt Bellany, founding partner of Puck News, and I'm covering the inside conversation about money and power in Hollywood. With my new show, The Town, I'm going to take you inside Hollywood with exclusive insight on what people in show business are actually talking about. Multiple times a week, I'll talk to some of the smartest people I know, journalists, insiders, all of whom can break down the hottest topics in entertainment to tell you what's really going on. Listen now. Listen to the Ringer Fantasy Football Show. My name is Dana Hypatty. I am joined by Danny Hibatai. Kelly and Craig Coralbeck, if you're wondering who to start, who to sit.

We have our rankings up at Fantasyfootball.com. So go to Fantasyfurtle.com. Our rankings are there. My Twitter's at Danny B. Kelly everywhere. Craig is at Craig Coralbeck. And then if that collapses, I'm also Danny Hyfitz on Instagram. Super easy to spell. But we put it in the episode description, but, you know, just in case you don't

to spell that. We didn't have a Friday episode last week. Yeah, I don't know. We're rectifying that today. We're talking about our vibes heading into week 16. We weren't going to do a Friday episode, but then there was like a bomb cyclone. I love all the adjectives describing what,

what like winter storm is coming to hit, like the Midwest and the East Coast. It's just like this giant storm coming from the Arctic, sweeping down the plains. It's going to affect literally like every American, except for people in L.A. maybe. You know what's funny is there's like a little bit of a heat wave in L.A.? Christmas Day is going to be 75.

Well, right now, I live in both. Wellington, there's like a foot and a half of snow. This doesn't happen here. It's a big deal. It's basically shut down the city. It's been a cluster of a week for me in terms of like getting around and everything. I can't even imagine what's like on the West, on the East Coast where it's like much worse, much colder. And it's going to be super windy. All these games are going to be affected. All the games are outdoor are going to be affected this week. So we're going to go through all these because it's just crazy. Yeah, I'm in Pittsburgh. If you hear a corgi barking, it's because I'm at my, my girlfriend's brother's place. And honestly, I don't think I would have been able to make it.

Oh, shut that. You're getting married next year, bro. Yeah, you don't hear me talking about it. Fuck, dive into that too much. You want you to talk about the weather first? I'm just go through all this. I think the weather is the big story. 100% of the story of the weekend.

I mean, let's just zoom out here for a second. I read this in CNN and like this sentence like rocked me. An incredible 60 million Americans or nearly 20% of the U.S. population will experience a below zero temperature with this Arctic blast. Yeah. Dude, it's crazy. The stat in that article that blew me away, the Denver airport dropped 37 degrees in one hour, which is a record.

What? Dude, Cheyenne, Wyoming had a 30-degree temperature drop in 10 minutes. Can you imagine, like, being outside and it's 50, and then it's just 20 in 10 minutes? Ugh. The real feel, so, like, obviously, the temperature is going to be really cold. It's going to be, like, in the single digits for many of these games. There's several games this weekend, and this, I saw this.

from Fieldy-Aid's. Several of these games are going to be, like, in terms of wind chill, bills at Bears, negative 11 degrees. Also, wait, hold up, hold up, hold up. You just used real feel. I've never heard that before, and that should immediately replace wind chill. That is a great term. Is that even a term? Did I just make that up? That's so much better than like the feels like. Real feel. Yeah. Real feel, we just, the weather, the weather people love the names for things. Bombs cycle. Real feel, we just, that's, that's, like a great. Bomb cyclone sounds like an action movie from the 80s. Yeah. Like, how was that?

not a movie of Sylvester Stallone in like 1983. Bomb Cyclone. Wait, so what temperature did you say was a negative 11 real-field? So in Chicago, bills at bears, negative 11. Oh, my God. Makes sense. The lake effect, if you will, maybe. I don't even know.

Saints at Browns, Cleveland, this game is going to be crazy. It's supposed to be like negative 9 degrees on game day. Raiders at Steelers in Pittsburgh. High Fitz, you're in Pittsburgh. Negative four degrees. Hyford, do you go into that game? I have to tell you guys something. I am going to that game.

Oh my. I am. I haven't told you guys. So my girlfriend's birthday is Christmas Eve and like nothing ever happens on her birthday. You know, it's like you grow up at school and like they just do all the birthdays over holiday. You know, it's Christmas. None of your friends are ever around. It's our whole life.

Like it's nothing doing your birthday. There's no events going on. So like the Steelers is like the 50th anniversary of the Immaculate Reception. And it's like, all right, let's go to the Steelers. Franko Harris just passed away. Yeah. Well, yesterday it's negative four degrees basically. And we're like, oh, do we want to do this?

And then Franco Harris passes away. And we like, well, we have to go now. now this is like a crazy moment. But like, it's, we're all, I'm literally going to wear like four layers of socks. Like, we're all cut. Like, I feel like I'm the, what's that movie the day after tomorrow where they go out? Yeah. That's how I feel.

There's going to be wolves on the field and whatnot. So shouts to Kevin Roth from Roto Grinders, because he put together an article about this. And it was really useful and informative. He's a meteorologist by trade, I believe. But this quote, how he starts it out is ominous. He says, this is without a tout, one of the worst, if not the single. worst week of weather I've ever seen in the NFL. That's cool.

I love a sentence that begins with without a doubt. I love those statistics or opinions. This is without a doubt. Something heavy is happening in those sentences. Eight games with total with degrees below 40 degrees. No, no, sorry. That's eight games with like game totals below 40. Yes.

So there are eight games whose totals are in the 30s. That's half the league. There's going to be no scoring. We also need a word for the. that for the winter when the temperatures drop below like team totals. Right, right. It's like one thing for the temperature to be 30 and the, but when the team total is like 17, but it's like going to be like 10 degrees.

When I was reading that, I was like 40 is not that cold actually. So why are we putting this here? That makes a lot more sense. The Saints, the Saints Browns game, the game total is 32 and a half, which is the lowest game total in the NFL since 2007. Oh my God. Cool. That was two recessions ago.

do you want to talk let's talk about the two biggest weather games i think for this weekend then we can talk about the other ones that are going to be bad so like first off that that one they mentioned saints at browns um in addition to it being very cold around 10 degrees but the real feel much colder there's supposed to be 20 to 30 mile an hour wind with gusts over 40 and so that is really important obviously it's just going to suck for all the players but like the passing games when you get when you get wind gusts over like 25 miles an hour that's when it actually starts starts to affect really like people's players ability to or quarterback's ability to throw, receiver's ability to catch the ball. That's when team starts to just go into run mode probably and just survive mode. Well, that win game, the Bill's Patriots win game that was like same gusts, that goes to like up to 50. But also, it's not like they can totally predict how strong the gust will be. That was the game where Mack Jones literally through three passes in the entire game.

And like, we're approaching that and it's colder. So in addition, the Saints just. put Jarvis on injured reserve. They declared Crystal Lavi out for this game. They're going to just run the hell out of the ball, I feel like. This is going to be like all run game. Dude, I got to tell you right now, this is Taseom Hill week.

Like, this is taste. Like if you, I don't know where he is. We need something better than like the Amendoza line, but like somewhere in the tight end streamer buffer rankings, you're like, oh, whatever. Like, I'll just go Taseem Hill, which for me has been whenever you get to like Noah Fant and he's gone like,

do him. I think we've been talking about Juan Johnson has seven touchdowns, the last seven games. At this point, would you just rather have Tayson Hill than Joanne Johnson? Like, Tayson Hill than Cole Comette in this Bears Bills game with the wind in Chicago and the temperature? Like, I kind of think Taysam Hill's a top 10 tight end play this week because

I feel like Taysam Hill's going to get eight carries at least in this game. I know. He's going to be like lining up at quarterback and whatnot. This makes me very nervous for Andy Dalton, not that he's necessarily a big deal this week, but in Superflex leagues. But yes, I think Taysam Hill is probably going to be a big part of his game plan. So I don't know, man, that's kind of freaky.

We can just skip right to it because I was going to bring this up too, but this is a potential Mario Kart situation for Alvin Camara. Not only is the weather a massive, massive variable here, but the Browns, their run defense has absolutely imploded over the last month plus. I'm going to go through a couple of the last couple games that they've played. Week 15, Dobbins and Edwards for the Ravens combined for 20 rushes of 20-10 yards. Week 14, Mixon and Pyrine, 18 carries 118 yards in the touchdown.

Week 13, Damien Pierce had 18 carries for 73 yards. And then week 11, Singletarian Cook for the Bills, had 29 carries 172 yards. And the week before that, the Dolphins, Wilson and Mostert, Mostert combined for 184 yards rushing. So, like, they've just been absolutely giving up incredible amounts of yardage on the ground in addition to the fact, like, this is giving me super windy, rainy, or not rainy, but like, potentially snowy. very, very cold. It's good for Alvin Camara, who's been pretty atrocious the last like six weeks. So is this the actual Alvin Camara blowup game or is that just wishful thing being? It's the Tase of Hill blow up game. I do think, I do think Camara is worth, like I think Camara is going to have a good game though. You have to play Camara. I think you're totally right. Taston Hill's a good call. I mean, I think this week specifically, if you want to focus in on this Brown Saints game, there are a lot of guys who are kind of typical plug. and play players that I really think you might have to reconsider this week. David and Joku is another one. You know, like, I might want to just start Tassam Hill over David and Joku straight up. I mean,

he hasn't been great with, uh, in his last five weeks since coming back from the injury anyway. He basically said one decent game where he got a touchdown. But man, in this game, I think you have to reconsider starting guys like David and Joku. Amari Cooper has been banged up for two weeks. He's been really bad with, with Dishon Watson. He's put up six, five and seven points with Dishon. The Saints, Not only are, is this game going to be played in sub-zero temperatures? Saints are great against the pass. You know, we'll get to this later because I have some options I want to ask you guys about. But if you're an Amari Cooper manager, I think you could start to kind of dig deep into your bench and consider guys to start over him.

I totally agree. I texted you guys a couple days ago saying that I thought this was the hardest week to rank receivers in the entire year because, again, we don't want to overreact to the temperature too much. Like, it's cold. Like, don't overthink it. Like, you don't want to play a bad player instead of a good player. player because you're like afraid vaguely of the cold. It's going to be cold everywhere, mostly. But the two games where the wind is going to be insane, like the, you're so right.

Like this Brown Saints game, I think you're like you can bench your market. Because again, Deshawn's been terrible. This is a field. And also it's like the coach is huddled onto when coaches, when the quarterback can't control where the ball is thrown, they won't throw the ball. and so like Deshawn's already been bad for the Browns and it's like both teams are going to be like bunker down and be like

the Saints are going to think us Camara Tayson Hill we can outrun them the Browns D sucks and the Browns are probably thinking we have Nick Chubb we're going to bully them they're both going to try to win the time position it's like yeah you can benchamari Cooper for like players that might be on waivers because Sean Watts is going to throw 12 passes

in this game like I don't know yeah man and Joku the same thing I completely agree this is some of the toughest decisions I've seen. Like, Olaavi being out almost helps because I think Olave would be benched too. Right. Totally.

Totally. Just save you from yourself kind of deal. Yeah. Do you guys want to move on to the Bill's Bears game? Because there's a very similar vibe going on with this Bears game. It's supposed to be around 10 degrees. There may be some snow during the game. Winds 20 to 25 miles an hour with gusts up to 35 miles an hour.

So this, again, is like... Gus up to what? Gusts up to 30 to 35 miles an hour. It's going to be very windy. very cold, potentially snowy. Obviously for the Bears, we don't rely too much on the Bears passing game anyway, so it's not that big of a deal.

But with the bills, like, this is a team that we need this week. Like, what does this mean for Stefan Diggs? Does this make Gabe Dave unplayable? Yes. I think it might agree. I look, obviously I'm opening myself up to like Gabe Davis just having another six catches for like 300 yards.

Like literally breaks the NFL record for receiving and has five touchdowns. and is like the skeleton key to winning. I am not going down with my ship. With Gabe Dave, I have already made the decision. I'm not playing him because, again, he could be great.

He's basically been, I mean, significantly worse than like Donovan People's Jones for basically two months. Yeah. And like, it went from comparing Gabe to Zay Jones to actually Zay Jones is like 10 times better

than Gabe Dave at this point. And it's, I just can't, you can't go down with your ship with this guy. It's like we always say like dance with who brung you. It's like, oh, should I bench Camero or whatever? It's like, play the people who got you to the playoffs. The opposite is I can't lose because I played this guy that I already kind of hate.

Right, right. You know, this is probably overthinking it, but somebody like Stefan Diggs, who I drafted this year, I love Stefan Diggs. Should I start factoring in the fact that he plays in Buffalo and just like knock him down a tick? Because every year he's going to have to play games in Zee's. degree temperatures in Buffalo. I mean, he's had his last two weeks, he's had eight points and five points because he's played at home in Buffalo against the jets and the dolphins. And the weather was terrible.

And it just completely takes him out of the game. And he's going to have to do it again in Chicago this week. Like, shut his draft guys who play in domes? No, I think the answer. Warm weather. No, the answer is no. And here's why. First of the bills are in Chicago this week, which sucks.

But Josh Allen, his arm strength, he's actually one of the few quarterbacks where the wind affects him less. Like he can literally just throw the ball harder. I'm not talking about necessarily this. I'm saying like in general, like should you avoid players who are playing in bomb cyclones every December? Probably. No, the thing was last week,

it was like the bills just, digs didn't do it well because they threw like three touchdowns to their tight ends. And it was just like the matchup that kept winning. And like, but the bill still dropped a bunch of points last week in my like on Miami. Like Josh Allen throwing the ball wasn't the problem last week. Yeah. But I see what you're saying.

I remember like, 15 years ago, it was like, should you even take Peyton Manning and Marvin Harrison? Because the Colts might get a buy in the playoffs like two weeks early and not even get to play in the championship. I don't know. Like, I guess if I'm deciding between like Devonte Adams and Stefan Deggs next year, it's like, well, Devonte Adams gets to play in a dome in December. That's kind of nice. I was going to say, maybe it has like a tie-rigger, Craig. I think if you're just completely eliminating him from, you know, like your potential to be picked, that to me is, it's just like one too many variables.

There's so many variables in football. There's so many variables in fantasy. I just hate this. I hate that I have to deal with Stefan Diggs turning into like a middling wide receiver in December because he's playing in the fucking snow every week. Especially in the semifinals of the fantasy playoffs right now. It's miserable.

It's nice that Josh Allen and Fields are still like honestly like top guys just because they're running. And like there's not really a temperature that will take them out of it. But yeah, it's like everyone else. I mean, it's good for David Montgomery though. Yeah, David Montgomery. Devin Singletary is probably more playable than he normally is.

Maybe James Cook. Maybe James Cook. It's funny that the Bears, there's no, again, bench Cole commit. Like, you can't, I don't think you want to play. Like, what do you do with Tasson Knox? What do you do with Dawson Knox? I think it affects the Bills and Josh Allen less than any team because I don't think that they're the team that, first of all, mentally, so many teams are like, well, the wind, we can't

control it. Like, we're going to run the ball. And like, the Bills don't do that. Even the win game, the bills were trying to throw. So, at least more than the Patriots were. But I think that the Bills won't change their mentality. and also Josh Hunt can do it. I will say,

we keep talking about this abstractly. Every like five minutes, I keep remembering like, I'm doing this. Like, I'm going to this. Like an idiot. My girlfriend heard that. I love you.

But I read this thing. Kevin Roth, who wrote the meteorologist, who wrote about the fantasy football thing, without a doubt, worst weather weekend. Did you read what he wrote about the Steelers Raiders game

that I'm going to? No, what he said. He was like, well, the players, you know, they'll be on the sideline. they have coats, they have heatwaters, they'll be fine. And he says, just brutal weather, though, for the average fan.

I'm like, God damn it, what am I doing? This isn't even your team, Hyfitz. You're just going, you're just going to be out there for four hours. Watching two six and eight teams who have no hopes of anything in the playoffs battling on a frozen tundra. You ever watch a game with terrible weather and you're like, why did people even go to this? I'm like, oh, that's me. Then you got to deal with traffic.

Then you got to freaking deal with lines. Oh, my gosh. Can you imagine it? Imagine how steamy it's going to be in the bathrooms? That's going to be disgusting. Just bring a water bottle and be in it. I had not thought about that till now. You're just going to be inhaling piss.

I can't be outside because it literally might freeze. Jesus, deacon. Well, that's the first thing I think of when I go into the stevie-ass bathrooms. Inhaling piss? Well, it's like all the pisses like vaporizing into like the mist and stuff. I've never thought about this in my life. This is a real thing? You're never going to not think about it now.

Wow. I think I'm really quickly. All the first. mentally. It's just water, though. Don't worry. It's sterile. You're fine.

The urea can't become into the air. Well, I don't know. The urea? Is that a word? That's the, that's what the, what pisses. It's urea plus water, right?

Like, that's the actual stuff your body makes. I don't know. I mean, this sounds like a good trivia question. I do not know. Hi Fitz. Yeah.

Okay, let's pivot out of this weird bathroom conversation. You didn't want to like linger on the water. Sorry. I want to leave the bathroom at Hinesfield and go onto the football field. No, it's not.

Other players, so speaking of guys, we talked about Amari Cooper and David and Joku guys that maybe you could sit. Man, like George Pickens and Deonti Johnson, if you have other options that are decent, I might go for them. In addition to the freezing cold temperatures and the wind and whatnot,

George Pickens has been really disappointing. Yeah. With this weather, like one, Kenny Pickett doesn't take deep shots anyway, and that's kind of George Pickens' bread and butter. Like, with this weather, with the wind, I really don't see that being a factor. I think the Steelers are going to try to run the shit out of the ball because the Raiders are vulnerable against the run. And then Deonté, the best games Deonté has all season are with Mitch Trubisky.

Like, you know, you could probably pencil Deonti in for like six, seven catches, but I can't guarantee it'd be for more than like 40 yards. I think Deontes is super playable in full PPR because you can get the eight catches and just have the eight points if we gets nothing. Right. Half PPR, I mean,

if you don't get any points per reception, I don't even know if I would have theontam my team at this point anymore. Half PPR, you're stuck in no man's land.

Yeah. So isn't he on pace to, maybe you said this already, sorry. Isn't he on pace to set the record for most catches

without a touchdown ever? Oh, is he? I believe so. I could be wrong. But it's, it's going to be, targets, yes.

Like, if you have something like Corey Davis, like, I don't know, I'd really think about that. I don't want Other than here

Well it's Thursday night They're playing tonight Yeah exactly Oh you're right Okay well then If you have somebody like Adam Thielen Yeah

Well again That's Giant's Vikings are in a dome And on that point Craig Like at some point Again I don't want to Overstate all of this When you're talking

Before Craig You're like Should I should not take digs It's like DK said it right It's like it's a tiebreaker If you're literally 50-50 Diggs your Cooper Cup

It's like all right sure Take Cooper Cup If you're 50-50 because of the weather, but it's a tiebreaker. I don't want the weather to be like, you should bench

Justin Fields for like, you know, Kirk Cousins because Justin Fields is in the cold. That's not what I'm saying. But there is something

in the middle where the weather's more than a tiebreaker. You know what I mean? Like the weather's like more, like Kirk Cousins certainly over Lawrence because of the weather.

You know what I mean? Like it's not even close. Like maybe even Daniel Jones over Trevor Lawrence tonight. I know that he's playing Thursday, but like that's probably where I'm at. And I think the most glaring honestly is with the kickers. Like, I think that's where it's kind of black-white to me. Like, Cairo Santos on the Bears,

if you have him, goodbye. Like Will Lutz, the Saints guy. Like they're not in a dome this week. Goodbye. Tyler Bass, on the Bills. Dude, with the wind. Like, Graham Ganoe on the Giants, Greg Joseph for the Vikings, Cam Dicker for the Chargers, Chase McLaughlin. Any kicker in a dome, I'm like, throw out the matchups. I don't care. Like, give me the guys where the coaches are going to be like,

field goal begins, you know, with the 55-yard field goal. Because when it's cold, obviously the bar, the ball travels like less when it's cold than when it's hot. Like, that's fair.

This is really annoying. This is terrible. This is during the freaking fantasy playoffs. Like if this was in week nine or something, it'd be like, okay, whatever. We just have to get back. I don't know how to fix this.

There's no fix, but. Well, we're on at global warming. We're, look, we were on the stop recycling train like a month ago.

We're really at the heart of fixing this with the global warming stuff. Good for us. Good for us. Here's the question. Let me ask you this. As a pure fan, do you like this weather stuff? No. Yes. I love it. It's awesome. High fist is going to be, you're not going to like it on Sunday. No. I'm there or no. Did you say no, D.K.? You said no? I don't like the weather is a variable. No. I'm like of that ilk who thinks that every

team should just have a stadium. So we're not like having to deal with this bullshit every week. I do like, like, I'm kind of a sap for like the, you know, it's very American and old school to kind of like have the gritty snow game in December. There is something about like even just it being on your TV when you're like making dinner and you like see the snow and people walk in, look at the screen. Oh my God, it's snowing in New York. But it's brutal now that everyone is betting way more, playing fantasy way more and cares about like the statistics way more. It actually just makes everything terrible. I agree that it's bad for fantasy football. I think it's awesome to watch because it's the only sport where weather is so important.

I know hockey's on ice, but it's like hockey's indoors. Basketball's indoors. Like they don't play golf really if it's like freaking raining. It gets dark in golf and they're done with it. You know, tennis, baseball, like there's rain delays. There's rain outs. Football, it's like, yeah. Snowing might get a foot.

It doesn't matter. It's funny to me that. The NHL is literally played on ice and all of their state, all they all they, they all play in stadiums. Well, they do one thing outdoors a year.

It's like, and they're like, oh my God, look how cool this is. I just think it's really, as Craig said, like it's, it's just awesome that the element,

it's raining. And it's like, yeah, well, yeah, good luck with that. I just, it's kind of incredible. It's just like, it's like the meet you in the parking lot.

It's like, you don't be there. Like, just show up. And it doesn't matter what's going on. But it feels very primal. Yes. It's extreme. But this is an extreme weekend.

Again, as you said at the top, 20 million people will experience negative real feel this weekend. Like, that's crazy. Yeah, I mean, it's fun and all. But then when you spent $57 on Stefan Diggs in an auction draft and he has three straight weeks putting up six points, it's not going to be that awesome. That's the thing where I think when we, another memento tattoo,

which we did on Wednesday, we did all the things we'll tattooing ourselves so we don't forget ahead of next season. One of them should be like, you can literally draft the best draft. like if you could do a time machine from like week 11 and go back to the beginning of the season and just do your draft knowing what you knew

for the first 11 weeks this season you could still just get crushed in the fantasy playoffs because like the Jerich McKinn's and the Zay Jones and like so much random stuff like this happens it's a brutal game I don't know why we play it not to mention the fact there's like

just games on Christmas Eve and Christmas this year like just yeah there's like a full slate on Saturday. There's like 12 games on Saturday and then three on Sunday and then a game on Monday. Oh yeah. They want four days. Oh, so yeah. I meant to say that at the top that the most basic part of all this is you need to set your lineups like today. You're listening to this on Friday. You need to set your lineups today because it's, you know, you might forget that Saturday, Christmas Eve like all the games are kicking off minus like four. We didn't talk about this, but all this weather is going to make travel just a God. dang cluster fuck for everybody this week. Are you guys traveling or are you guys stay? I have a majority there.

Yeah. So Craig, you don't have to fly into the Arctic, do you? I'm not traveling at all and it's going to be 77 on Sunday. I literally hate you so much and I hope everyone to listen to us too. I just got a text from my mom that my sister's flight got canceled. Oh.

It's like this is what we're, this is why I bring it up. But like it's just going to be such a massive CF for everybody trying to like get anywhere this weekend. It's going to be fun. Great times. we didn't even mention the other prong of all this, which is not only as all the weather terrible,

a quarter of the league is just on their backup quarterback. It is unbelievable. The quarterbacks, we'll have to watch this weekend. Malik Willis is starting for the Titans against Houston. And Ryan Tannel is probably done for the season. He might be done just as a Titan period. So Malik Willis is just the Titans started going forward.

Lamar Jackson's out for Baltimore, so it's going to be either like Tyler Huntley or like Anthony Brown for the Ravens. They said it's Tyler. Okay, it'll be Huntley against Desmond Ritter in the Falcons. The Colts have already, the Colts coach Jeff any given Saturday is benching Matt Ryan for Nick Foles

to play against the Chargers. I forgot it earlier. Foles has not, he came out this week and said he hasn't really played at all. He hasn't gotten any reps with like the starters this year. Yeah, he's been the scout team. He's not even the backup.

He's been the scout team guy. That's the other, the quarterback, like he'll just be the quarterback for the other offense. His job has been to mimic the Colts opponents every week. He has not run the Colts offense,

which is crazy. So that Kyler Murray's after the season Colt McCoy is a concussion So the Cardinals are going to start Trace McSorley Against the Buccaneers This makes me literally one of

I'm thinking I'm actually considering Benching D'Andre Hopkins this weekend Like that's This is what kind of week we're in What are we doing here? McSorley is he has like 40 passes Basically as a pro

But he's completion percentage It's under 500 Cool It's crazy that Tom Brady's going to lose to trace McSorley But he is I know I was thinking that Oh my God

The Bucks are going to to just find some like, plumbing the depths of how depressing loss they can be this week. Well, you go through the games this weekend, you're like, Taylor Heineke, Brock Purdy, and you're like, oh, that's like Brady versus Manning. It's incredible.

Yeah. But the big one of the weekend, obviously, so Jalen Hertz has a shoulder sprain. So then Jalen Hertz, who has picked up everybody. He's basically got the shoulder sprain from carrying all of your dead weight to the playoffs this season. And now when you need him most, he's gone. So Gardner Minshu is starting for the Eagles against the Cowboys. on Christmas Eve, Merry Christmas.

I had to choose, I have, I have Hertz in a semifinals this weekend. I had to choose between Russell Wilson and Kenny Pickett as my starter in a one QB league. Well, that's what I wanted to ask you. Where's the point where you would play Minchew? Like Minchew or Russell Wilson, who would try?

Oh, I think I would choose Minchew over like all of those guys. Yeah, just because of the surrounding cast. 100%. What about Minchu and, I was going to say Andy Dalton, that's just a joke. What about Minchew and Aaron Rogers? And they're playing in Miami, right?

Probably Rogers. I think it's Minchu just because like Rogers it's so hard for him to get over 17 points. We get 10 last week you should have at 17 because Christian Watson should have had a Minchus also in a dome which is nice. Also Minchu might be good. So you'd take Jared Goff over Minchu, right?

Yeah, were they in Carolina? Yeah, I would go golf. You would take Tom Brady or Gardner Minchew. Minchu, dude. Minchu. Trevor Lawrence, in the bat who's been playing amazing against the good defense in the Jets and terrible weather on Thursday

football. It's Thursday. This is a moot question because it's Thursday. I know, I'm just saying. But like that's the thing is, like that's a question people have to ask. Gardner Minchew or I would take Minchew over Watson and the wind. I would take Minchew over. Oh, easy. Certainly. I mean, Minchew or Brock Purdy? It's close.

The Niners are humming. man probably brock i think purdy that's thing minchu or sam darnold perthers are playing minchew minchew that's the thing though like minchu is playing for people it's crazy yeah i kind of love that also low key the other one is the cowboy's defense are kind of a weird thing because the cowboy's defense has been like getting you like 15 or 20 points or like two but they they don't have an in-between anymore and you kind of have to play them against guarder it's a backup quarterback but on the flip side like, dude, the Eagles could shred the Cowboys defense. I like, I like Philly plus

five. They're getting five this week. I like that. I took it. How much you want about that? Minchu throws like six touchdowns this week and then earns like a Matt Flynn contract next year from somebody. Give it to him. Low. Unless Bill gets a job running the Patriots. I don't think that's going to have. Actually, I don't know if he's even a free agent or not, but

still, I want it to happen. We didn't even mention this with all the weather stuff. But between the weather and the quarterbacks, the backups playing. Dude, there's also some like real Galaxy Brain defense potential. Because like, I mean, between obvious ones, you know, if you have like, you know, the Broncos, you know, and you kind of have backed into like a great quarterback matchup.

Tampa Bay or something. Yeah. But two weeks ago, three weeks ago, I was like, you should pick up the Titans because they'll be playing the Texans in week 16. And now it's like, you know what's a great matchup? The Texans defense against the Malik Willis and the Titans. And I'm like, is that what's going on now? It's like there's some real galaxy brain defense.

stuff. Well, Texans are like a fringe playoff team now, so no one knows what to believe with them. Well, on that note, I actually have an award for this Texans' Titans game. Oh. Do we have, is there any other weather stuff, quarterback stuff? We want to get off our chest, though?

No, I think we've hit the Winter Wonderland of this week. So I would like to give Derek Henry in this Titans game. I would like to give him the Robert Oppenheimer Award. okay you guys have been seeing the trailers for oppenheimer oh yeah and i it's and like one of i think the first trailer they released they have like oh two christopher nolan movies for us this week

but they have a they have opanheimer reading also this is a real thing there's a video of it's crazy and he reads like the like hindu scripture and he's like now i am become death the destroyer of worlds like that's derrick header against the texans he's four straight games of two edjid yards against the Texans, which I think is the single craziest active football stat. I had to look this up because I was very nervous that you've been saying this for months and it's not actually true, but legit true. He had 219, 250, 21212, 211 in the last four games against the Texans. He's my number one running back of the week in fantasy.

He's going to get 30 carries. Well, what's crazy is like there were only eight running backs who've had 200 yards in a game four times in their entire careers. And Derek Henry is on a four-game streak against one- By the way, he has nine touchdowns in those four games, too. So crazy. But again, I just keep thinking about how he did it to them this season, and they were just surprised.

But here's the problem. It's Malik Willis a quarterback, which he did it earlier. But all five of the Titans offensive linemen are on the injury report. So they're banged up. Like, they're really, really banged up. But what are you going to do playing? But I just, if Derek Henry gets another two-indud yards, I think I'm willing to be.

like, okay, this is one of the most dominant. This is like, I don't know. Are you nervous that this is going to be like the week or whatever, the time that it just absolutely goes in the tank? He just does, he has like 50 yards on 25 carries. Well, at least you know he's getting 25 carries. Like, that is a lock. True.

All right. Next award here. Can I ask, my next award here is an award pertaining to me and only me? I would like to run through a few of my fantasy quandaries and ask you guys. Oh, you just ask. asking us what you think for your own questions. Yeah, I'm just trying to get some advice for my team. So, the running back struggle is real.

I got, like, a bunch of, like, these guys who are like, I don't know who to start. J.K. Dobbins or Miles Sanders? Is it, am I galaxy braining it by telling myself, should I start J.K. Dobbins over Miles Sanders. Miles Sanders basically scores 25 points or five points every week. That's it. And they're playing the Cowboys who are a good deed, but they've been kind of vulnerable to the run. And J.K. Dobbins is back-to-back week.

with a hundred yards, they're playing the Falcons who suck. And they've got the Minchew situation now in Philly. Am I galaxy braining it that I'm thinking Dobbins over Miles Sanders? Don't you feel like the Eagles will probably run a little bit more than average because they've got their backup quarterback in there, though? Yeah, but now defenses, there's no, like, read option worries anymore and all that crap. That's true. It does feel a little galaxy brain to me, though.

Would you be asking us this if Miles Sanders had had, like, even, nine points last week instead of like one and a half or whatever he had. Maybe not. Yeah, he literally had one point last week. That's my worry.

He had one point. Like sometimes he just gets like 20 yards and no touchdowns. And I feel like Dobbins is kind of a lock to get 15 carries 80 yards. Minimum. I don't know. He's been like really good.

He's been, yeah, he's been really good lately. The problem is, do you guys still think like, don't be stupid start Miles Sanders? I don't know. This is tough stuff.

I think we're all going to have Milesonters ranked above Jackie Dobbins. If you go to fantasy football dot the room. com and so you should follow our rankings but it's not a dumb question because jkidobbins is going to get the volume and then you don't know that about miles sanders which is kind of the opposite of a lot of honestly the way we look at this is like what we're just saying about mary he's going to get the 25 carries like we don't know that like mild sanders can get six

carries a game he's probably the highest rank running back we have where we don't we're not sure but it's like even with minchu i feel like the eagle's offense will work in a way that man the Tyler Hunt. I see what you're saying but the Falcons defense sucks but it's like the Tyler Huntley Ravens

they're so one dimensional I it's not a dumb question but I would go Sanders still but it's not a directive sometimes people ask me questions I'm like do this don't think about it and sometimes I'm like

I would play Sanders but I actually get if you want to play Dobbins all right next one Amari Cooper in the bomb cyclone I would like to sit him and start either Jahan Dotson

Richie James is that just moronic Honestly it's not It's not like There's a world where Amari Cooper just has like Nine catches for 120 yards And you think about it for six months But I have to say this is one where I would check the weather

Because wind is like Even Thursday we're recording this Like wind can change a lot And honestly even like It's hard to predict If they are still saying that this game is going to have gust in the 30s on game day. I, it's not, this is insane to say out loud.

Like, Richard James was literally the Giants punt returner. But like, I can't even say the words. The problem is John Dotson, who I love, they're playing the nineers. The nine defense is incredible. That's the problem. It's like, that's not a good matchup either. So you're going to play a rookie against the nine is defense. Like that's, I'm like having to decide whether or not I want to start Brian Robinson

against the Niners. The Niners have absolutely shut down opposing running backs this year. I would still play Ryan Robinson because they, the offense, they have to give him the ball. I know,

and he looks so good last week. It's just, man, this is why this week is so annoying. It's like not only are there all the weather things and all the backup quarterback things, but some of the matchups are really tough too. It's true. It's the matchups.

It's the quarterback screw up the offenses, but again, you don't know how to predict it because it's like sometimes they turtle, sometimes they go for it. But I would, I think in those I'd probably still play Cooper, but honestly you could play Richard James.

It's not crazy. because Richie James has been way more important this offense. That Washington game in Sunday football like he was, the Giantsons have been like, like, it's such a like hate relationship with Rich James

because he's fumbled punts. He's been like unreliable. He screwed up the first Washington game with like doing the wrong thing on like a key third down. But like his timing with Daniel Jones was so much better this week on Sunday football that he actually,

if you didn't tell me he was our punt returner, I kind of wouldn't have known. Like he actually just looked almost competent. So yeah, I actually gunned in my head I could see him beating Mari Cooper but my body physically won't put those words out. I like that you called it

a like hate relationship but like there's no possibility that you could ever love Ricky James. No, Richie James. That's just Dick James. Yeah. Richard James is my father. This is how fantasy goes and it's so annoying. Like you always try to plan for the worst, right? Like

you have all your backups. You always think you're set and then a bunch of weird shit happens and I'm in the semifinals of a fantasy league and I'm like, man, am I going to start Richie James? Honestly, I'm the two seed in this league and I'm starting Richie James. I think you still should play Murray Cooper.

Like, again, if the wind really is in the 30s, I would bench every brown passing game. But even if it's like low 20s, I would still play Mario Cooper. All right. I'll have to check in with Roker Saturday morning, so what you think.

All right, thanks for doing that. Speaking of the Giants, though, with the Ritchie James stuff, the Giants playing the Vikings this week, which is so funny because those are the two teams we've been giving the SBF fraud watch alert. And, like, if you've been following it, one of them's going to snitch this week. One of them's going to turn on the other.

Well, if either team wins, does that turn them into not frauds? No. Or we just suspend the fraudulent. No, they're getting off. Whichever team wins is still a fraud because they won. Well, right. No, if you win.

And the team that loses is also a fraud, because they lost. No, the winner's like doing the plea deal and the loser's being convicted of being a fraud. Who's going to talk first? The loser is being convicted of being a fraud,

but the winner just extends their fraudulent run for one more week. Yeah, a plea deal. Remains unchanged. Just in case, I'm a Giants fan, so I can say that Giants and Vikings are frauds.

And in case, Rich Rebar, sharp football analysis, has an excellent case for prosecution. of every team, if you just rank every team, just by how many of your snaps have you actually been winning the game? Like,

how many, how much time have you spent winning? The Giants and Vikings are both last among teams of winning records. Vikings have been winning for 30% of their snaps. Giants, like a quarter. 30%? How, I don't understand how this happens.

This is so funny. The other funny one is, again, as everyone knows by now, the Vikings, they're 11 to 3, but they've scored two more points than their opponents. Unbelievable. The Giants is because they got blown the F out. What was the final score that Cowboys came? A lot, but still, it's still 11 to 3.

I know. But the Giants are 8-5-1, but their opponents have outscored them by 25 points. So, yeah. I actually think the Giants kind of will have a good pass rush for this one. I'm actually, I kind of think they could do it. A couple frauds. I hope the Vikings win,

because I want them to continue to not be exposed as frauds just yet because I'm going to bet my entire livelihood on them against them in the playoffs. I think what's funny too, it's like they're average in the way that like if you stick your head in the oven and your feet in the freezer, you're at room temperature. Like they're just this team of like such extreme swings. It's unbelievable. So I don't know. All right.

Probably unanswerable questions of the week. I have a question. Are we nearing the end of this Mac Jones experiment in New England? This is more just like a vibes check, I think, because it feels like Patriots fans are out on Mac Jones. And I don't like, you know, I don't really talk to like, I haven't like done a real poll or anything like that. But like there's, he's getting booed at games.

There's been multiple times during the season where they've been chanting for Bailey Zappy to come in. And I understand that it's impossible to ignore the like Matt Patricia a Joe Judge variable because it's like, what did you think was going to happen? This is the dead dove do not eat bag. Of course, the offense sucks.

But Jones has essentially one good game this season out of 11. He has one game, which I would say he looked pretty good, and that was against the Vikings who Hafeitz has established or frauds. If you take away that game out of his total, he has four touchdowns in 10 games, four touchdown passes in 10 games. I mean this genuinely.

what is the argument that any of this is like Mack Jones's fault and not Patricia or Joe Judge's like Patricia's fault particularly I think well I mean the argument would be like have you watch the games

like he looks bad and he like is constantly yelling at his teammates and just constantly frustrated and like throwing tantrums he really does have the temperament of like 2022 Tom Brady like they're acting the exact same way right now he had to address that this week

but honestly there's a world where it's like good they suck like he should be mad right right right and i kind of like so like and ruse we talk this a little in the nflb show today and just like and this is true like when bailey zappy came in that was uh the monday of football game against the bears and they that was two months ago and fans were cheering billy the zappi then but they changed their offense for billy zappi and they did all the stuff like you put the training wheels in the offense you do all the easy stuff like they were doing play action they were like throwing on earlier downs to like give him better you know defenses to throw

against and like booting him out, you know, throw him out. And then Mack Jones came back and they just didn't change anything. They just went back to all the other stuff. Yeah, but honestly, weird. Stephen Arias has done it. He's talked about this a lot, but it's such an interesting

point of like, well, the quarterback who's good, like Dak Press guy is like, well, he's great. So we should do all these very difficult to accomplish things because in theory it works. But when he gets hurt, the backup's like, well, he's not as good. So we got to do all these easier things because they work. And then DAC comes back in, it's like, they go back to the hearts.

It's like the why don't you just build the play in out of the black box? It's like just all those little tricks that help the backup you can apply to the starter. And it's like some teams do those things. And they like the giants, the simplest way to explain what Brian Dable has done is it's like Brian Dable's like the Madden player who's like, wow, those like six plays work really well. I'm going to call just those things. And they're like, oh, the play action boot to the tight end. We're going to do that.

They've called like 55 plays this year where Gian Jones just boots out and throws to a tight end Yeah, but like the Giants offense isn't good. Like I feel like, no, but I feel like that works to like patch up holes with Band-Aids and it only lasts for so long. Like if you actually want to go far and win like multiple games in the playoffs,

you can't be doing that. I agree. But the Giants have more wins than the Patriots and their specialties punt returners starting for them. And it's like the Patriots have actually spent more money. on this team and their team than the Giants have on theirs. So it's, I don't know. I mean, I don't, I don't have an answer.

That's why I'm saying it's probably unanswerable. But like it feels like we've had a big enough sample now this year where Jones has just really been bad. Like in 90% of, you know, his games this season. I looked at outside, I understand like you're not going to take away the Minnesota game. Like, that's part of his season. That's part of like whatever. But like in all the other games, those 10 games, his EPA is negative 47.

the only player, the only quarterback with a worse EFA in that stretch in those weeks is Matt Ryan who was benched. It's just like he's been awful. To be clear, he has been awful. Did you watch him in the Raiders game? Their whole offense has been awful too.

The Raiders game was a disaster. He missed tons of open throws. I'm not, he's been so awful. And I guess what I'm saying is I think that sometimes we forget that these players and even the quarterbacks are employees and their bosses tell them to do things.

And it's like a cornerback, an offensive guard, whatever. They're not just making shit up. It's like you're doing things that you're told to do by your boss, the coach, in the way that they told you to do it, preferably at the time they told you to do it at.

It's like super specific. And so when Matt Jones actually kind of looked at times more solid than doubters like me thought he would look last year, and then it comes in a guy that we all kind of are like, well, look at this guy who's never coached on that side of the ball schematically and also interpersonally

has been like a disaster with so many people that's coached is now going to run and then Mack Jones looks worse and the offense looks worse. I'm like, I think the boss sucks. I don't think it's there's absolutely no argument. Right. Like 100% that's like a given like obviously this environment

is bad. The environment and the scheme and the coaching like that all I think is objectively bad. Like we've established this is not good. But I'm just curious like if if Jones is going to get swept up in that, you know, if he's going to be, essentially if they're just going to move on from him at this point

because he's been so bad this year, even though it's maybe not all his fault. I don't know. That's what I'll be thinking about during this game. I'm curious, but we'll find out. I'll just be thinking about how I'm going to dress myself and Long John, so like four different sweaters. By the way, they get the Bengals who are really good.

So good luck. You just want to do an email? Yeah. All right. It's from Riley. Riley. Riley. Oh, this is perfect.

What a segue with. Speaking of bosses. Gentlemen, I need a ruling. Myself and a co-worker manage our boss's fantasy football team. Not because our boss cares about the prize money, but because my boss gets satisfaction from crushing the hopes and dreams of his ears. The league is run by our boss's boss and is filled with various high-level managers and department heads at our company. It's a 14-person league four playoff spots.

So 14 teams. but only four playoff spots. We took the league out behind the woodshed, week after week, finishing the season, 13 and 2, and we clinched our playoff spot in week 11. Nobody else clinched,

clinched until the conclusion of week 15. And amidst week 15, with three playoff spots up for grabs, the commissioner, who again is our boss's boss, spearheaded a brigade to increase the total playoff spots from four to six.

Oh, my God. And the vote. was held and of course because it gave everyone a better chance at making the playoffs two playoffs spots were just magically added in the final week of the regular season since i am mere i am just a mere cog in the machine i was obviously not present for this conversation and now we are forced into a week 16 by and the championship round will now be held in week 18 18 when are we children is this our time playing fantasy football, not only should this be classified as cheating, but also the most reckless, asinine and ignorant decision I've ever seen from anyone in a leadership position,

except for Matt Patricia. Don't buy stock in this company, guys. The decision making is terrible here, but let's go. Continue. This guy work at FTX? Did he just recently get extradited to the United States? The commission. Continue, sorry.

Email us at ringer, Fantasy Football, Gmail.com, if your commissioner has ever been extradited for like any reason. Jesus. Riley continues, a true leader would go down fighting, not lobby the competition to turn things down to easy mode and allow the final round to basically become a game of rock paper, scissors. Please let me know if I'm overreacting

or if somebody should be arrested. No, obviously this is the correct reaction. Yes, this is stupid. This is unacceptable. Yeah. But what do you do? This is the dumbest I've ever heard. Nothing. He can't do anything. Rage against the machine, man. You can't do anything.

Turn towards the bottle. I have no nothing. Well, the one thing I was wondering is this. Do they take the week 18 thing to their advantage and do you start grabbing players who might sit? So like, sorry, play because other players sit. So like, I mean, the Eagles, how do you predict that? Well, the problem is it's ruined because the team that was going to clinch was the Eagles.

And so the guy to grab was freaking Gardner Minshew. But I don't know, I'm looking at like if the chiefs were to sit like Travis Kelsey, then like, I don't know, like Noah Gray is like the starting. But like it's so hard to predict. This muddles everything. This is so annoying. I wonder if the commissioner made the playoffs because of this rule. I assume so.

If the commissioners, the five or six seed, if I ever saw that dude in the little coffee room, I'd give him some words. Catch hands. Can they even acknowledge that they're running their bosses team, or is that ratting them out? Yeah, I think he's not allowed to say that part either. Oh, interesting, interesting.

Dude, 90% of these fantasy course that we get are just commissioners doing shenanigans. Just operating unilaterally. Just cheating, like outright cheating, essentially. But the other half is the commissioners. The rules of the playoffs in week 15. I'm sorry. What else is he doing for this company? You know?

What's going on to those meetings? Money laundering? Anything is on the table. This is all front. Do you imagine if this company went down because they discovered like some financial mismanage? That's actually, maybe that's how FCX went down, the fantasy football league. Just a shady fantasy football commission.

Adding, he's just like stealing waiver funds from all the people in his league and adding it to his own team. The problem is the other half of the cases we get are commissioners dealing with people who are awful people. It's a tough job. It's a thankless job being a commissioner. You either like lose your friends

because you're right and they're wrong or you are basically embezzling money. Well, I feel like every commissioner starts out trying to be like very egalitarian and like, all right, I'm going to, we're going to, we're going to vote on everything, polls left and right. And then when you're in like year three, you're like, I'm so sick of all these fucks. I'm just going to make a decision. Yes. This is why I always say fantasy football is incredible because it is like legit, the smallest form of self-government that exists in modern society. It's like me and 10 people we

know will have this culture governed by our rules. And it's this perfect microcosm for leadership. You go in, as you said, Craig, like, do-eyed and, like, optimistic. This is going to be great. And by the end, you're like, democracy overrated. It's a lie. Like, nobody gets to say, I know best. Like, honestly, like, everyone else is dumb. Plebes.

And I regret ever giving them power. Now I just text like, we're increasing the buy-in this year. You can't dispute it. So leave the league if you don't want to pay $150. That's the rule. Love it or leave it, baby. You start as a democracy and you're like, this is actually a one-party. league down. Yeah.

I don't think I've realized how much people will argue about asinine things in fantasy leagues. I thought like when you start league you're like, yeah, people will probably just like agree and people won't really care that much. People get fucking mad if you like try and change

any little thing. Dude, we started a loser's bracket this year for the first time and the loser because we wanted to give people who didn't make the play have something to do. So there's a loser's bracket and whoever loses then has to be our butler on our draft. trip. Yeah.

They got to wear like an outfit and like, you know, order all the food, make sure, like, book the Airbnb to all that stuff. So I send the rules of what this, we call, we're calling it Maid madness because they have to be our maid. And I was like, all right, here are the matchups. You know, the two worst teams in the league get a buy because the way it's set up is like if you win, you're safe and if you lose, you advance. You don't want to lose, right?

So the two worst teams are on by. So whatever. I set up like the schedule. This is what's going to happen weeks, 15, 16, and 16. 17, here's who's going to play who each week. You know, the 11 and 12 seeds get a buy. The next week they play these people, blah, blah, blah. So the first week goes off perfectly fine, smoothly.

And then I get a text from one friend. And he's like, what the heck? Why am I playing this guy this week? And I'm like, well, that's because that's what the setup was. And he's like, but that doesn't make any sense. Like, shouldn't it, shouldn't we change it to where, like, the worst team, you know, the top seed gets to pick who they play next? Like, why does it make sense that I'm playing this guy?

And my only response was, is I sent the rules a week ago. and you had no fucking problems with it. And now that it affects you personally, now the rules are a problem and we need to vote on everything. And I was like, sorry, this is how it is. Welcome to local government, Craig. Decisions are made by people who show up.

Can you email us at ringer fantasy football at gmail.com, please, if you have stories of just, honestly, commissioners just becoming jaded. Like, just becoming jaded. I'm jaded. Making you more authoritarian. And my buddy listens to this pod. He'll probably text me.

He knows who he is. I get how you get more cynical as you. get older. I remember when I watched Avengers in theaters. The first Avengers like, Loki comes down. I was like, I'm going to Freedom is a burden. And I'm like, oh. And now I watch, I'm like, freedom's a burden. I'm like, yeah, kind of.

Now, especially with like, I mean, this is very low stakes, but especially with like entertainment. I'm like, dude, tell me what to watch. Just tell me what to watch. I wish there was four channels. Too many fucking choices. Just tell me, just put it in front of my face. I'll watch it. I was like shopping there. I was at the supermarket

and I was like, you know, I was on this and my girlfriend wanted some specific kind of chips and I had my coffee. I hate you. I had my coffee yet. And I was like looking and I went out and I was like my eyes. I was like oh my like it's so like it physically hurt my brain

to look at all the shades of red. And I was like I wish, why is there sea salt? How are there nine different kinds of sea salt chips? What like weird niche product has expanded to offer way too many varieties? Oh my God. Do sea salt like?

chip that's up there. The first thing that came to mind was like Reese's peanut butter cups. There's like candy's nuts. There's like 12 versions of Reese's Dude, you ever been down the honey aisle? There's like 50 honeies now. Oh my God. Way too many honeys. Olive oil? How many different kinds of olive oil do you need?

Aren't they all made out of olives? Well, I think some are like technically they're mixed with other unrefined oil or refined oils that aren't good. But yes, you're right. Yeah. Mustards. There's like a hundred

mustards now. Barbecue sauce. Now we're just on condiments. We got to get off. Dude, but I seriously, like you walk down and anytime you go into one of those,

I mean, eggs is another one, but like I think of the Pirates of the Caribbean quote when he's fighting him in the blacksmith shop and all the swords carcoring. And Jack Sparer looks like,

who makes all these? I'm going to open a simple store. And you just, go in there and there's just like one mayo. It's just like a can. It can that says beer. This is the Trader Joe's thing where the Trader Joe's one is just like simpler times. And it's just beer or like they have that beer.

And it's like a beer that tastes like beer. And it's like, I want that for everything. That beer is kind of bad for what it's worth. Simple time. So is beer. Beer used to be bad. I don't know if that's a good selling point. My simple store is you walk in. There's like fucking Heinz mustard.

You can go somewhere else if you want boogey. mustard options, but you know what? You get in here, there's one aisle, and we fit everything in one aisle because there's only one option. Maybe that's a Walmart. I don't know. It exists. It's huge company. Massive. You know why you didn't think of it? They don't advertise. Walmart? Well, they do, kind of, but. Yeah, I've seen commercials. Yeah, they do. No, they do. Yeah. Quite a bit. Okay. Well, awesome. We'll omit that. I guess omit that point. Rescended.

That's fine. Take that off the table. All right. Email some of your fantasy football at gmail.com for brands that there's just too many of and we need less of. Jaded fantasy football commissioners, various wind related decisions that just destroyed you. Stupid backup quarterbacks that shifted your fate in the fantasy playoff fortunes. And also we're doing the ringer NFL draft show. So two jargons that a lie is back for the ringer NFL draft show.

Check that out. It's on Thursdays. And I guess you can ask this football questions too and also about prospects. All right. Thank you everyone for listening. Thank you, Dicay.

Thank you, Craig. Thank you, Al Roker. Thank you, Lauren. Lauren. Thank you the Vince Goraldi trio, aka the Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack, which I've been listening to on repeat. I probably have done this in the past,

but this is just like the soundtrack of my life during Christmas time. So the Charlie Brown Christmas music soundtrack. bangs so hard. Is that the guy who does the music for Charlie Brown? Yeah. I love, I mean, my Snoopy is my Twitter avatar.

Oh, yeah. It's got to the point, Craig, where I put that music on and Calvin, who is three, goes Charlie Brown. That's sick. He loves it. He doesn't even know what the hell Charlie Brown is, probably, right? Barely. I think, I mean, this is really lame,

and this contributes to, like, techno music, just ruining all other music, although I would argue that it's improving it in many ways. but like how has no one come out with like a bangor Christmas album? Like why hasn't Kygo just taking the Charlie Brown Christmas music and just woven some masterpiece out of it? Let's, I want that so badly. Now that you said that, I, you're right.

Even like Big Booty should just, two friends should just come out and just make like a Christmas big booty. Yeah, man. Like Canon of the Bell's Kygo version would be nuts. Oh my God. And then you just keep interjecting like the George, George, George, It's a Wonderful Life. By the way, I watched It's a Wonderful Life last night in a theater where I'm my girlfriend's family and like I.

Flex. You went to a theater to watch it. That's very wholesome. Yeah. Craig felt bad. That's why I saved it right there. It's because you're honoring cinema, so I didn't insult you. Cinema.

I got to tell you, I cried even by the standards of It's a Wonderful Life, like an unnerving amount. I had any dog in me at all that's gone. Like, I, I, I think I lost water weight. Jimmy Stewart is one of those people who I think has just been faking the way they speak their entire life. No one sounds like that. That accent's gone. Like that accent died out. It's like accent daddy.

Yeah, it's like transatlantic or mid-Atlantic or whatever. But I, I just can't fathom that a human being spoke like he did. Like, not that long ago. Like 60 years. years ago. He was just like, honey, come on over to the window. And it's just like the most cartoonish voice. Keep doing it more, Craig. I want to hear more. By the way, Jimmy Stewart, another of the World War II generation, went over to Nazi Germany, killed a bunch of fascists, came back, set up a business, one of the most famous actors in the world. Set up a business. I don't know.

You know what I'm talking about. He joined Cloise and who else were you talking about? I can't even remember. Dick. So yeah, Dick. Fuck, what's his name? Dick Bong. Major Dick Bong. Oh, and then who is the Don Strock?

Don Strock, yeah. Man. They don't name them like they used to, boy. Dude, but the whole accent is ridiculous for the movie. But then in the, when they do this part where he'd like never been born, the other bartender takes over the bar. And that got, he is like the Dion Waiters award of. It's a Wonderful Life.

And he comes in and he's like, all right, a couple of funny guys, huh? You know what I mean? And it sounds like a parody. It sounds like a family guy parody of it's a wonderful life. Claire,

get over here. It's like, what are we doing? Am I playing in my Cooper or what? You see all this wind out of you? But dude, the phrases are the phrases they have. I turn my phone off,

which is why I think I cried so much in the movies. This was paying attention. But I wish I'd written them down. They should take your phone when you go into a movie theater. Oh, like, yeah, that's pretty good. Watch the movie. You know that he was a, he reached the rank of Brigadier General. Oh.

He was like a big time movie or sorry, he was a big time war hero. Have you guys seen rear window? That's one of my favorite movies. He's awesome. Old Jim. Oh, Jim. James Maitland Stewart. We need to bring some old lines back to.

So I was thinking like, what's the matter with you, huh? Like, what's gotten into you? you say it like you made it shaking them by the shoulders what's gotten into you like the beginning like when you were like any sentence that begins with

without a doubt that's a good one but like we need more of these like with the emphasis yeah what's gotten into you what's got it snap out of it's also like one of them

like can you imagine if I actually looked you in the eyes Craig like and meant it and was like what's gotten into you I'm like what are you 90 Mr. Mr. Mr.

Mr. Mr. What's got into you? Mr. Like a little kid walking into like a candy store and being like, hey, mister. Like that happened. Oh, that's the problem with the new generation, Craig. No one calls each other Mr.

No. That's that worth of the big. No respect. All right. Goodbye, everyone. Should we just go to DK? Should we just start calling DK Mr. Mr.

Mr. Mr. Mr. Mr. Mr. Tell me about the war.