The Ringer-Verse - Into the Ringer-Verse Live Show! | The Ringer-Verse
Episode Date: July 23, 2024Did you miss our live show in L.A. this summer? We got you! Here is all of the fun 'The Midnight Boys' (00:00) and 'House of R' (30:12) had with the Bad Babies and the Midnight Mafia. Learn more about... your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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We had no idea who was going to do that.
Oh, yeah, we did.
I was not prepared.
He wouldn't tell us the song.
That was awesome.
Shout out, shout out Chris Ryan for that V-O.
That was pretty cool.
Oh, hell yeah.
Wait, he wrapped him with that?
Chris Ryan, yeah.
Chris Ryan, yeah.
Rapped it?
No.
Oh, that was you.
Okay, sorry.
Yeah, no, that was me in the intro.
It was coming at the beginning.
Chris Ryan did my fellow Americans bit.
Oh, that's classic.
Yeah.
Yeah, interesting.
All right, look, we got something special for y'all tonight.
Yeah, we got to get to it.
Chuck, let him know.
All right, so we wanted to do something very special.
Thank you guys all for coming out.
Would you guys say our most controversial bit is midnight court, right?
It's been the discussion of many, many a debate.
So today, we're doing a mini midnight court,
and all of us are going to be on the stand for some of our worst takes,
embarrassing stories.
And if we get through this fast enough,
we want you guys to be involved as well.
So we're calling this, beat the allegations.
All right.
Now, the first person in the hot seat tonight is you, then.
Whoa.
And the allegations that Steve, the Mint Boys, Jomi, and I have come up with is
you are by far the most problematic Midnight Boy.
I am.
It's not even close.
Steve, if you had to judge who had the most shit taken out of a pause,
I have not, I have like three years worth of pods just on that alone.
But, but here's a problem though.
This is what I'll say.
So, wait, are you, are you officially taking the stand?
I'm taking the stand right now.
All right.
So this is the first thing I'll say.
Number one, if it was up to me, none of it would be taken out.
Right.
That's true.
It's part of me to be like, okay, we should probably take that out.
How do we feel?
Actually, that's not true.
The first fight that Midnight Boys ever got.
into, it's because they took something out without me knowing.
Yes.
And I'm listening to the pod like, oh shit, where's my shit?
I was talking about my grandmother and my grandfather having sex.
And they took out the pot.
To me, see, the deal is this.
I'm a very, look, you guys.
Oh, please.
I'm very woke.
Oh, what?
I'm sex positive.
Don't do that.
Okay.
Don't do that.
I'm very sex positive.
I like to talk about love making.
between people sweat, dripping on each other,
huffing and puffing, moving.
This leads right into our perfect question.
And you guys are from a different generation,
and so you always get bashful about it.
Just let it out.
All right, you know what?
Before you finish this, 30 seconds,
can you name me 25 porn stars?
Definitely.
So, Asian.
So let's go Asian.
That's not.
That's not.
Charles, this is about making your bed and sleeping.
Now, why did you do this?
Nautical.
Ayesha Carrera
Katsumi
Alright then Latin
Lexa Silver
Sophia Costello
Keep going
Stop
You won't stop
My mother is here
Isis Taylor
Who did you say was here?
My mother is here
Oh your mom is here?
Yes
Okay so then we'll go black
So
Reset the list
Dines de Beau
Cinnamon Love
Heather Hunter
All right
All right
Jack meat
Now I have to ask you, is this, you're supposed to be beating the allegations.
Is this?
Are you done?
Do you have anything else to say?
Well, first of all, the allegations is that, okay, let me ask you a question.
This is how I'm going to beat the allegations, okay?
So if we said here, I could probably name 200 four stars.
Now, look, the problem is this.
Why is that problematic?
This is how I would beat the allegations.
What's problematic about that?
Midnight Boys is a family show.
Well, it's, no, it's not.
It's actually.
It's definitely a family show.
It's rated explicit on the Apple store.
Facts, number one.
And I would say secondly, everybody has to have a hobby.
People do different things to, like, have a good time.
And I personally think that-
Koothing is your hobby.
Oh, that's too far.
So, look at, but, hey, that's good.
Before we move on.
That's the law.
Right.
When I actually innovated it, it didn't have a name.
And so I wouldn't have said that before,
but I'm saying the only way I'm going to,
to beat the allegations is do I say anything you say I'm problematic do I say anything to bring
people down do I say anything that doesn't bring people you know I say do I say anything that makes
people feel bad no I try to free people I try to make people you know all right sure is that problematic
guys this is audience participation time sure if you think van beat the allegations can you make some
noise? Now,
if Van didn't beat the allegations,
can y'all make some noise?
Oh, damn.
That's a wrong jury to me.
Wait a minute. To me, that was a time.
Okay.
One more time.
We're close to a mistrial here.
Jury, go back and be unanimous.
Come on, man. Did I beat
the allegations?
All right. All right. Let's move on.
All right. Please.
Steve. Oh, Lord. You're up next.
Ooh.
All right, Steve.
Which one did we come up with him for?
So here's the thing about Steve.
Okay.
Oh, yeah, I remember now.
Yeah.
I don't know if you guys can tell, but Steve is what?
What?
Extra.
Extra white.
Nobody told me.
And when we obviously first started doing this podcast,
we asked Steve if he ever dated a black girl before and he told us yes.
And he told us that he took this girl back to his room and he put on Selma.
No, that's not what happened.
It was the movie theater.
That's not what happened.
Objection.
Let's get the facts correct.
Objection, Your Honor.
The allegations that you need to beat, Steve,
is that, not that you're a sacked,
we know you're a sactivist.
Yeah, sure.
But are you the number one panderer?
Ooh.
Oh, right.
Dog, they are already not on your side, Steve.
They are already...
This is an away game for me.
Okay, listen, half the time
I find myself on this podcast,
I say everything that I say, and I mean it,
and then I keep saying that, like, oh, no, you're pandering.
You don't actually think that, you're pandering.
Now, what I asked to you,
why do you think that I can't actually believe these things?
Nica, what are you talking about?
Yeah, I don't know.
That was, like, the worst.
So you're having a fucking Willem DeFoehlum
DeFoe Green Goblin conversation with yourself
about whether or not you're pandering, Steve.
I'm going to be honest, Steve.
You used to be somebody.
Not to, you know, cause beef or anything, you don't be acting like this on the House of Ar.
No, you don't.
I'm not on.
Okay, first of all, I'm not on House of War.
With them, y'all be talking about bagels and cottage cheese and shit.
And you're right at home.
You know what?
Charles.
Cheese.
No, you know what, Steve?
I'm going to help you out right now.
Okay, fine.
Yeah. Beat allegations.
One of our greatest moments on the podcast happened at your expense.
So I'm going to give you.
Oh, man.
I'm going to give you 30 seconds right now.
Name me 10 civil rights leaders.
Oh, wow.
All right.
Come on, Steve.
Steve, I believe of you.
Y'all can help you.
I believe in me last time.
Come on.
30 seconds.
All right, hold my hand, Van.
No.
That's crazy.
That's the problem.
With your people now?
We've always got to hold your hand through everything.
Just do it, y'all to know.
He's trying to absorb the information through osmosis.
Yes, yes.
He's trying to.
I'm getting, I'm getting.
Okay.
Go?
Okay.
30 seconds, go.
All right.
I'm okay.
All right.
That's a layup.
Why is that funny?
Why is that funny?
Because they know, they know, they know, that's y'all one.
All right, that's number one.
That's y'all one.
Y'all got a day off of everything.
What would MLK do?
If I, you want me to get you mad and say, Sean King or something?
Just keep fucking go.
Okay, that counts.
Okay.
Shout out to him.
All right.
We said black, but go ahead.
It's a joke, Sean.
All right.
It's a joke.
Malcolm X.
Yes, he counts.
Yes.
Jesse Jackson.
Yes.
Okay.
Al Sharpe.
Yeah.
Okay.
Rosa Parks.
Okay.
Come on.
John Lewis, John Lewis, John Lewis, John Lewis.
Okay, okay, okay, keep going.
Help him out, guys.
Help him out.
Derey.
Doree.
Doree.
Okay.
Doree.
Come on, come on, come on.
Keep going.
Help him out.
All right.
Harriet Tubbin.
Harry Tup.
Civil rights.
Yeah.
Civil rights?
That was a little past.
No, no, no, no.
I'll allow it.
I'm not going to relitigate it.
I'll allow it.
Okay, come on, come on, come on.
Let's go.
One more.
Fred Hapton.
Fred Hapton.
All right, guys, before we move on to Jomey, but yeah.
Before we move on to Jomey, if you think that Steve beat the allegations, can you make some noise for me?
If Steve didn't beat the allegations, can you make some noise for me?
Oh.
Steve, I think you beat the allegations.
Steve?
I think I might have.
All right.
Thank you.
Jomey.
It's my term.
In honor of your birthday, in honor of your beautiful parents,
your beautiful family being here,
we wanted to prepare a very, very special question for you.
Yes.
Can you beat the allegations that you were the biggest milk merchant at the ringer?
Man.
So where's Jomey's family at?
They're in the back.
You're in a big piece of you.
They're out there.
You're up there.
Round of applause, Jomey's family.
Okay.
Have y'all seen Adonis?
Drake's kid.
That's y'all future.
Jome...
That's nuts.
We're just trying to get you guys used to the fact that, you know,
Jomey loves him a white woman.
And so if that's not true, Jomey,
you have the opportunity to beat the allegations right now
and from your beautiful family who I've met before, okay?
By the way, anybody new to the show,
this is a fandom and pop culture poplots.
Stay tuned for more.
Speaking of fandom, the reason this started
is an episode of Hawkeye, right?
I want to say it's episode four.
You hear the groans because we already know what he's about to say.
You know exactly what I'm talking about.
It's Haley Steinfeld and Florence Plyuze here is seen.
I was like, hey, that's good work.
And y'all was like, ah.
Y'all went, ah.
It's true, but I'll tell a quick story.
Quick story.
Please don't.
So we go, so we have something called
the late-night movies.
society. And yeah. So we go there
on Wednesday nights at the AMC. Shout out to my boy Otto.
We watch movies before the movies come out and stuff. And me and Jomi
are a part of this and we went to see Mission Impossible, the latest mission
impossible. So we in there, y'all already know. Yeah, I heard that. We
in there watching the movie and remember, it's late. By the time we start the movie,
it's 12, 12, 15, it's late. So we all sleep. Jomey is
literally falling asleep because he falls asleep
without the drop of a dime you look over and he's
snoring.
Chopping with
like gone. Gone instantly.
Jomey is sleep. Haley Atwell
pops up on the screen.
That's probably true.
That happened.
Here's what I will say.
Who among us?
You're supposed to be
being out of days.
Jomey doesn't care if he beat jollations.
I want every single person right now.
Okay.
If Haley Hatwell hits your line, y'all at the bar,
and she's like, hey, what's good?
Y'all, y'all going to tell me, y'all are saying something.
Scarlett Johnson, Margot Robby,
Alexander Dodario in that,
true detective.
Where are you all at?
No, let's be serious.
This is my name to civil rights.
Let's be for real.
Let's be for real.
20, let's go.
No.
I need you to get to five.
Honestly, Jomey, you're doing a terrible job, so.
No, no, no, no.
I just want to ask you really quick.
Can you give me the 15 greatest black women in 30 seconds ago?
15 graded.
Actually, just named 10 black women, period.
If you know 10,
uh,
Serena Williams.
Oh, boy.
He's actually doing it.
The fact of, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, hold on.
Is this content?
We have to get down.
Yes, and?
Young Buck, I'm going to help you.
This is supposed to be the answer to this question.
Man, I'm like, I ain't got to do that, man.
That's in my soul.
The moment you start to do it, you fell.
Like, he's actually doing it.
But, okay.
Let me ask. Okay, let's ask a more
Pearson question. Yes. Why white
women? So here's the thing.
Okay. Here's the thing. Here's the thing.
You know what I'm saying? Let me be very
I'm not being the allegations. I lost.
It's over. It's over. Right?
Honestly, take a plea deal at this point.
I'm like, I'm talking about Laura. Like, look, man,
let me take the 15, bread.
Here's what it is. Okay. All women
are beautiful. Okay. All colors.
All women are queens, Anakin.
All women are queens.
Oh, man, let's move on, bro.
And I did, and I could beat the pandering allegations.
Okay, don't do that.
Boom.
Don't pigeonhole me.
I know.
I won't.
All right.
Yeah.
So did I beat it?
No, let's move on.
Okay.
All right, let's skip me.
Let's go to the crowd.
No, we're not skipping you.
No, wrong answer.
Obviously, if you guys have listened to the podcast at all, you know that Charles sometimes can be a smit negative?
Just a little bit.
Just a little bit.
I'm the most positive midnight boy.
You think you're the most positive midnight boy?
So what allegation do we have for Charles to be?
Oh.
Oh. Who said that?
Who said that?
I want to know.
Wait, what happened?
Who said that?
Who said that?
Do we have a mic?
Do we have a mic?
Let's shine a light.
Let's get the mic.
Let's give a mic.
Let's give a mic to this brother right here.
Where's the house?
It's right over here.
Raise your hand.
Stand up.
Say it now.
Because we want to hear from the people.
Tell us who you are.
You're from LA, so tell us which gang you're in.
Oh, damn.
Oh, because he got a hat.
It's the thing.
No, no, no, no.
I'm from D.C.
Okay.
Even worse.
I ain't from how many people you've killed.
So why do you feel like Charles is a hater?
Now, I watch a little review y'all did,
and y'all brought the direct in from last season to X-Man,
and he stood on hate.
Okay.
Okay.
I stand on everything I've said about X-Men.
He did flex the Rotten Tomatoes score on us.
He did.
In front of Trump.
So you felt like in that interview that Charles, who hated X-Men 97, which everyone loved.
Yes.
You hated it, okay?
You felt like in that that was pure haterdom?
Amongst other things, yes.
Oh.
Wait, wait, wait.
Hey, y'all can just see each other outside after the show, baby?
I saw that.
Okay. So, Charles, here you have
a member of the audience.
Yeah. Thank you so much.
A listener. Appreciate you.
What's your name, brother?
Doug P.
What?
Doug P.
Doug T.
Doug T. Okay.
Doug Pee.
Douglas Pee.
Douglas Paiton.
Okay.
Douglas Peyton says that you are a hater.
You hated on X-Men 97.
Yes.
Convince these people you're not a hater.
Thank you, Doug.
You know, the way
I realize this.
X-M-97 to me
is kind of like when white people are like...
All right.
What are your feelings on Eminem?
And I'm like...
And I'm like, here's the thing.
Here's a thing.
Every single time, they're like,
yo, who's your time?
You don't got Eminem?
You don't like Taylor Swift?
You don't like this and that?
And I'm like, you know, as Gucci said,
like, I'm not playing that in the car
with my old lady.
And it's just like, I'll go outside.
So it's like, I'm not watching X-Men 97
on my free time.
It just doesn't work for me.
Okay?
It could be great.
it could be popular.
I don't give a fuck.
Y'all can pull me.
It don't matter.
It's fine.
Yeah.
You guys don't understand.
This is like a wet dream for me.
Hearing audible booze.
This is charging me up.
That's crazy.
If you're gonna feed it for weeks.
We got an entire season left the House of the Dragon.
I will stomp on that shit.
I don't do.
If they didn't put Cisco on a dragon.
Okay.
Okay.
is a deal. All right. So,
you've heard
the audience's opinion.
We've heard your
less than adequate response.
We've covered
dozens and dozens and dozens,
maybe hundreds of different properties
in the last three years of the
Midnight Boys that we've been doing this.
Name 10.
Oh, God, don't do this.
That you enjoyed.
Since we started?
Since we started.
Name 10 that you enjoyed
So from Falcon and the Winter Soldier down.
From Falcon and the Winter Soldier, which is the first show that we covered, right?
This is 2020.
Oh, God.
All the way up to nine, name 10 that you like.
All right, no, I can do this.
I'll be, I'll be shocked.
I can do this.
Okay, I'm with it.
Doom two.
Dune two.
All right.
Loki.
Yeah.
Which season?
Loki season one.
Okay.
Oh, it's getting bad.
Come on, too, ready.
Do you two down?
The Batman?
I like the Batman.
Did you?
I did.
Okay.
I liked it.
You didn't say love.
You said liked.
Like this fine.
Like this fine.
Can't love them all.
No way home?
I did like No Way Home when it came out.
Didn't age.
When it came out.
When it came out.
What?
That's a bubble chip.
That's a bubble chip.
You did some retroactive hating so I can't let you have out.
Yeah.
We all be.
You can't count that one.
And, and.
Andor.
And, and that's five.
That's five.
That's five.
I get no way home.
No, you don't get no.
No, you can't count that.
No, you don't get no.
Season with 66 games.
You can't count that.
Yeah.
Oh, fuck.
I'm really...
All right, let's go through.
What did Marvel release?
Damn, it's been bad.
It don't have to be Marvel.
Just anything that we covered.
You're making...
I'm going to give you one.
I'm going to try out.
I'm sweating right now.
Did we cover Blue Eye Samurai?
We did.
I love Blue Eye Samurai.
We covered Shogun?
Godzilla.
We cover Shogun?
My adventures with Superman.
My adventures with Superman.
Okay, Chuck.
Wait, what am I at right now?
Shogun?
You had seven.
I love Shogun.
Okay.
I love House of the Dragon, season two.
Did we cover Shogun?
We did.
We did.
We did.
We did.
We did.
Yes.
Yes.
We did.
God damn.
They remember.
I'm at eight, right?
44, man.
You're at eight.
Come on, Charles.
You can get two more.
Come on, now.
One more.
We're not going to help you no more.
The Snyder cut?
Yeah.
You didn't like the Sni-Cut.
Capp.
Cap.
Oh, Black Adam.
Hell yeah.
Oh, fuck.
Adam.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Hold on.
Oh, hold on.
No.
No.
No.
Jips in the books.
His Vagum Opus.
Yeah.
Really, really, really whack, bro.
Go ahead.
Okay, one more, though.
I'll give you Black Adam
because of your weeks-long bit.
No, it wasn't a bit.
It was a fucking bit.
You turned to a fucking bit.
One more.
Come on.
Hurry up.
He already...
I said Antwer.
What about She-Holt?
You like She-Holt.
Fuck, She-Holt.
Anyway, damn.
We didn't do Wanda Vision.
We didn't do Wanda Vision.
You did Wanda Vision.
The Bear.
The Bear.
The bear.
The bear.
The bear.
That doesn't count.
It don't count.
The bear is not midnight boys.
The bear is not midnight boys.
Oh, Spider-Verse.
Let's go.
Oh, Spider-Refers.
Why are we disappointed that we found 10?
Why are we sad?
Because we know it's bullshit.
All right.
Now, because we got a couple more minutes.
We want to open it up to y'all.
What allegations do you want to see us be?
If you got a question for us, raise your hand.
Make some noise.
Anybody's got a question right now.
The house lights are up.
See how you like it
Wow we're a perfect podcast
I heard y'all booing
So I know y'all got shit
Oh wow
We got a question right up here in the front
Let's go
That's me
That's me
The question is who is the bigger prude
Who is the bigger prude?
Oh it's Jomey definitely
It's for sure me
Yes
Let's explore this for a second
Do we want to
It doesn't take anything
It doesn't take anything
To make Jomi bashful
Yeah
Yeah
Does anybody have another allegation
Oh we got one
One year?
We have one year?
All right, Steve, here's my allegation.
Oh, no.
Do you take every draft seriously, or are you just trolling?
Oh, that's a great question.
Stand up.
Stand up.
Thank you, sir.
Thank you.
I do.
A hundred percent I do.
That's embarrassing for you.
Don't admit that.
I don't care.
That's, I love it.
No, you started playing to the crowd now.
No, no.
Yes, you have.
This is all for me.
100% for me.
I play for me every time we draft.
So you're not being serious then?
Yes.
That's not serious behavior.
I'm dead serious about not serious behavior.
I'm committing to bits you couldn't possibly imagine.
If Steve had the number one,
if Steve had the number one pick in a draft this year,
he would have picked Bronny James.
Maybe second.
He absolutely would have done it.
I think what really happened was this.
So when Steve made the Jordy LaForge pick...
I discovered my power.
I think what happened was you thought it was a great pick
because...
And I stand on that.
Like when you...
Guys go back and you watch that again.
If you watch the draft again,
a nigga Steve thought he was...
I'm so happy. I'm like, oh, I'm going to break him off
with some real shit with this.
Yeah, so this guy...
On the Enterprise.
Like, from the Enterprise, played with a plume by Lamar Burton.
He's weird with girls.
Your friend, my friend,
Johnny LaForge.
Wait, was that his first pick?
No, second pick.
No, second big.
We were like, yo, we were.
We looked at the zoo crazy.
He was like...
He was so into it.
That broke Steve.
Yeah.
Now Steve, like, that was it.
What did you have over here?
All right.
I'm Tejj.
I apologize for my voice.
I've been playing in Cibolet for three days straight.
That's fair.
I need Van to prove he's not the ops.
Short story to answer this.
So I was at brunch about a month ago when I bought my Ringiverse ticket.
I bought it at brunch.
Yeah.
I was sitting next to a friend of mine.
My friend said, what are you doing?
I said, I'm buying my tickets to the Ring ofverse.
It's great.
be there. She said, is that fan
Lathor's podcast? I said,
it is, it is his podcast.
She says, me and him are beefing
right now because he dissed me on his podcast.
Oh, man. Oh, my.
Wait, who's your friend? Who did he?
Who is your friend? I'm going to get there. I'm going to get there.
Okay. Oh, boy.
I'm confused. I don't know what's happening. So I'm like,
what are you talking about? So she
was at a birthday party
with your co-hosts of your other
podcast, and it was also your birthday, right?
Yes.
Okay, so my friend
was at this birthday party
as well.
We were all there.
Everybody was there.
Are you protecting this person's name?
You can.
I'm just making sure.
You don't want to say their name, that's fine.
Oh, hell us more.
So, Van did a bit about
an interaction at the party
with someone who
asked him to take a picture
or something weird happened,
and he did a bit about it,
which was probably hilarious,
but I didn't hear it.
And she was like,
I was offended by the bit
and I was like, oh, I'm sorry.
I'm not going to say her name, but that was it.
So, okay.
Do you remember the story?
No, I don't.
You don't.
There's no way.
There's no way.
Not a good start.
Let's get some clarification here.
The bit was about her?
Give them the mic again.
I'm sure she took it as the bit was about her,
but it seemed like from the story,
the bit was about the interaction that you and her had.
based on whatever happened at the party.
Okay, so let me tell you something,
and I say this with love.
Oh, no.
All right.
So this, with love.
Do you remember the bit now?
I don't.
Oh.
So when you talk to her again,
tell her that Van Lathen said
from the deepest pits of his heart
that she has the worst fucking case
of main character syndrome
I ever heard of before my life.
I wasn't talking about her.
I don't remember that.
I say hello to 15,000 how thousand people are dead,
I'm living these motherfucking streets.
You want to op, you gotta op.
Tell her to call me so I can tell her how much I don't give a fuck about that shit.
With love.
All right.
Does anyone have another allegation, please?
Possibly without a very specific story about an interaction.
I like that, though.
Don't give her the microphone.
I have a question.
Oh, yeah.
Who is that?
Who's that?
This question is for Steve.
Uh-oh.
Well, first of all, what's your name?
My name is Bala.
Tell him your last name.
Danny Rob.
Oh.
Hold on, Jomey.
That's your sister?
Out there!
There!
Stop, stop, stop.
What you're trying to do?
No, I'd say what you want to say.
We could go backstage right now.
No, no.
What is your point?
Mrs. Deneron, what is your question for Steve?
Before you ask Steve his question,
why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself?
I gotta stop a body on these things
Okay, go ahead, Steve
Okay, this is a question for Steve
So Steve, you've talked a little bit
about what you've done in the past
So question is, would you date a black woman
in your free school?
Steve, the floor is yours?
With respect to my girlfriend
in the audience right now
Nah, come
I would like to say no comments
but thank you very much for that question
Get the fuck out of you, man, Steve.
Is that 21?
What?
What are you want me to do?
Hold on, wait, wait, wait, watch this.
I'm getting in trouble either way.
Watch this.
Watch this.
Where's Lauren at?
Where's here?
She's up there.
Lauren.
Hey, hey.
I love to the girl with Lauren.
How about this?
Up here.
Shout out to Lauren.
Lauren, is it okay if Steve answers the question?
It's not.
Hey, she's looking out.
She got your back, Steve.
That's real love.
She's still 10 toes down for you, Steve.
Go put her rig on a figure right now.
Oh.
Yeah, you shouldn't have said that.
The next podcast is going to be
very fun as Steve's experience.
Who else? What else we got?
Oh, boy.
You got any more allegations?
Thank you for that question.
Hold on.
Did we bury the lead?
Hold on for a second.
Did we bury the lead right there?
Yes.
We talked about whether or not Steve
with date a black woman,
which we obviously know the answer to that is yes.
I took him the hot water corn,
Red downtown
Oh, hot water corn bread
was...
You can't tell none of those stories.
The Hennessy came out
and Steve changed.
Can't tell none of those stories,
nah.
The lead there
was actually that
Jomey's sister asked that question.
Mm-hmm.
Right.
Jomey.
Mip boys, do you guys
have anything to discuss?
Yeah, like what, is there,
if that would have happened
in another world.
Okay.
How does that?
You know what I'm saying?
I almost said something crazy.
Because the two mixed babies
could be cousins then.
Ooh.
That mixed baby
and then your inevitable mixed baby
I got to be honest with you
Jomi's family
something's going on
There's a lot to figure out
There's a lot to figure out here
Car right home is going to be crazy
Would you be okay if Steve
Don't fucking rough a question
If Steve, my sister
We'd have to have a long conversation about it
Like a very long conversation
Like a very, very long conversation about it
Yeah
That's your man's though
That is my man's but you got to understand
The best guy.
The best guy.
That doesn't matter.
None of that matter.
All that goes out to work.
None of that, okay.
When family comes involved.
You understand.
If I, okay.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
If you know what.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Whoa.
You don't even know what I'm saying right now.
It didn't start well, buddy.
Let's get to the finish line.
Land that plane.
No, it's just like, would I be allowed?
Would you be allowed?
Would you be allowed?
What do you mean by that?
No, am I coming for the Super Bowl parties?
Super Bowl parties.
You can come to zero parties, but you got to stay six feet.
No, social distance.
Social Disney.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, no.
Surge right now.
At all times.
Like Steve right now is firing up Selma.
He's thinking about it.
It's going to be a tough situation.
Right.
Look, guys, we gave you absolutely no nerd content.
Because if you've ever listened to our podcast,
is kind of not what we do.
But I'll tell you this.
If you guys are ready for the adults
in this entire ring of our situation
to come to the stage,
make some noise for the House of R.
The Midnight Boys are out.
We will see you guys in a second.
Joe and Mal, the floor is yours.
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I'm Joanne Robinson
I'm Mallory
What's up?
Welcome to House of R
Hello
We're about to play a couple games
That are a little different
From what the Midnight Boys just did
And
Because I love a competition
Mallory is actually
genuinely being very chill about this
I'm not here to compete
She's not in the head in mode
She's in chill mode
She's like why do we need to have points to run out?
I was like, because I like winning.
Vives only.
So I've come up with a prize that I'm hoping will tempt competitive Mallory out of hiding.
Is it Damon Targaryen's tongue?
It's Grogu.
Wow.
Our namesick.
It's a bad baby Grogu.
The bad baby.
This is how the bad babies got their name.
We're going to call this, huh?
We're going to call this the bad baby.
Okay.
And this is the prize.
I love it. I love a funco pop. I love a little bobblehead.
It's going to go back and forth between us in future competitions and live shows.
Fantastic.
And maybe at some point I'll spray painted gold. But for right now, it's a lovely minty green.
Delightful. I love it. thrilling. I love you, though, so it'll make me happy when I lose tonight that it's in your possession.
Okay.
Vibes only. I feel like... Here for a good time.
Part of my goal is to lure competitive Mallory out of her hiding.
We've got a couple of games, a couple of which we are going to ask for your participation in.
The first one, though, I know, it's so lovely to see you guys.
Thank you all for coming out.
Yeah.
Delightful to be here in this, like, crisp 87 degree room.
As opposed to the 62 degrees that Mallory usually keeps our room.
I think it feels great in the studio.
I drank a hot latte yesterday.
What are those lights for like, in the dead of summer?
Anywhere from an hour, 20 minutes to five and a half hours, depending on the day.
Who can say?
Were any of you here for the Talk of Thrones Live show?
A couple of you.
Ed was.
You might recall that a game that we played on that show that we did here for Chris Ryan was,
Name That Dragon.
He did wonderfully.
He did.
He tried.
So an idea we had, and we might do in the future, I just want to, like, spoil for you.
We're not going to do it right now.
But an idea we had.
to sort of lean into our brand.
Yeah.
Was, name that body part.
And then, here's the problem.
Yeah.
We got so specific with it.
We did.
As is our want that we realized we had each zoomed in.
So far.
Too close.
That we could not then get the images to be high res enough.
It was just going to be a bore of pixels and you guys wouldn't have enjoyed it.
And then also,
This is not why, but it's not not why.
I got an email for my high school English teacher, Phil Goodyear's, who is here with his lovely wife.
And I was like, I can't play that in front of Mr. Goodyear's.
And then I got a text from Joe and said, my high school English teacher is coming to the show.
And I said, at least two of my five selections involved the torso and nothing below the belt.
It should be fine.
She said, send me his jaw line.
And I was like, we're not doing that.
So we're going to do something else.
We're a part of our podcasting journey together.
It's coming up on three years.
Wow.
Right.
Oh, my October.
First week of October.
Yeah.
Holy shit.
I know.
So part of our journey through this journey together, this adventure is getting
to know each other and each other's loves and each other's passions.
So we thought we would challenge each other in a game we're calling bat v. bat or bat country.
where Mallory will be giving me some names,
and they might be Orioles players,
players for the Baltimore Orioles,
or they might be something else.
And I will be giving her the names of vampire characters,
and they might be vampire characters,
or they might be permanent members of the UN,
is who I've mixed in with my vampire characters.
We're going to go back and forth
We're keeping score
Because again, there is a prize to be won.
I will not be keeping score
For the first time ever on a podcast.
I am prepared to go over 10 or however me.
What is this?
It's okay.
It's just a thrill to be here with you.
The scroll, maybe?
Secret scroll.
Could be. It's possible.
Could be.
I love it.
I do want to ask you before we start,
did the only vampire I know,
Count Chocula, make the list?
The count did not make the list.
That I'm going over however many years.
I believe in you.
I believe in you.
Is Dracula on the list?
Dracula.
For all you vampire enthusiasts out there, I will say a lot of your faves didn't make the list
because they all have names like Angelus and Spike.
And it's just like, that's not going on the list.
You could have thrown on the other than.
Vlad the Impaler.
I might have got it.
All right.
Okay.
Do you want to start?
Sure.
Tammy.
Okay.
I'm giving you either Orioles or television characters.
Okay.
Here's your first one.
Slightly easier than members of the UN.
Okay, got it, got it.
Again, one of us entered this arena tonight with a generous heart
and the spirit of collaboration.
And one of us knows which body part of a friend we would eat if we had to.
Oh, so this is all payback.
Still, for saying if it were me, I would just simply not eat a part of my friend.
Not in that way.
The worst podcast thing you've ever done to me.
Okay.
Okay, here's your first one.
You ready?
Yeah.
Kobe Mayo.
That's an Oriole.
It is an Oriole.
Prize prospect.
Well, not yet an Oriole.
It would be great if they called him up, actually.
We could use his bat in the lineup.
I wasn't sure if you might think he was a character from Doug, you know, relative of Patty.
Patty.
Patty mayonnaise.
All right, hit me.
So Joe has won.
So she's already won.
She's beating me.
You are keeping score.
Look at you.
All right.
I won't need to be keeping score for me.
Stefan Salvatore.
Can you use it in a sentence?
Oh my stars and garros, it's Stefan Salvatore.
Okay, so it's a vampire or a member of the UN?
Christ.
Vampire.
That is a vampire.
Fuck yeah!
They said it couldn't be...
I've decided on my strategy, actually, in real time.
Great.
Do you want to share with the class?
Nope.
Okay.
Okay.
Here is your second name.
Heston Kirstat.
Trying to read the scoffs in the room.
Let me know if you'd like the television show thrown out there.
Or if you want that after.
Oh, I made scenarios for all of these,
whether or not they're actually Orioles or television characters.
Okay, do you want to, if this person is a television character,
do you want to tell me what the show they're on?
Is Heston Kirstap?
Yeah, an Oriole.
A Baltimore Oriole or a member of Welcome to Rexum.
Yeah, I know.
It's not fair, right?
Double sports?
What are we doing?
Okay.
That's an Oriole.
Correct.
Okay.
Valentin Rybuck.
Country of origin.
Vampire.
That is the UN designation from Belarus.
I almost went with UN on that one, but that would violate my strategy.
Okay.
I'm guessing vampire for every single one.
This was Chris's crucial mistake.
He didn't just guess after saying, well, isn't that Mali?
just keep guessing mailees.
And when the mailes came up,
he wasn't prepared to say meleys.
Disaster.
We all remember it still.
Okay.
Your next one.
Blip Sanders.
Do you want to tell me what TV show
Blip Sanders is on?
Is Blip Sanders?
You know, I'm giving you more information,
I'm realizing.
You don't have to.
I came here to share an experience together,
so I'm happy to.
Is Blip Sanders a Baltimore Oriole?
Yeah.
Or a character on the television show.
Pitch.
Oh, no.
and I've watched pitch.
Okay.
Oh, should I use the same
strategy and just say Orioles every single
time? You could? This will be a fun game
if you say Orioles the whole time
and I say vampires.
The problem is, Mal
said it was like present-day Orioles
but also Orioles,
latter-day Orioles. Correct. There are some
historical figures. And so
a blip feels like
he could be like a
1950s Orioles or something like that.
It's entirely possible.
I think that's not a baseball player.
Correct?
It's a character on pitch.
Outfielder.
I feel like if you had said the word blip around me at some point in the last couple years, I would have noticed.
My goal was for you to get all ten of these and then to be really invested in the 2004 quest for the World Series.
That's what I want.
Constantly intercepting me, always working.
Colin Robinson, no relation.
Oh, I know this.
He's an energy vampire.
That's right.
I watch what we do in the show.
I know you do.
I know you do.
I put that one in there because I know you know that.
Because you have three.
You're three for three here.
You're two.
I've got two.
You're very close.
Okay.
Here's your next one.
Okay.
Competent Mallory is here.
I'm glad.
I'm glad to announce.
No, no, no, no.
I'm glad to announce.
Vinnie Natoli.
Is Vinnie Natoli a Baltimore Oriale or a character on the Sopranos?
I knew you're going to, I knew you're going to soprano me.
I, Vinny Natalia.
Oh, no.
Natoli sounds like a baseball player name Vinny Lessso
I feel like that's a baseball player
Correct
Relief pitcher for the Baltimore Orioles
This is going to be so great when we go to the ALCS together
You can't
You're like I need to see Vinnie pitch the sixth
I have to
I have a lot of baseball opinions that are all plagiarized from you
Okay
Louis de Pontellac
Vampire
That is a vampire.
Oh, man.
All right, here's your next one.
I'm taking it, honestly, I'm taking it a little easy on you.
Louis de Pontalach.
Mine are all pretty easy.
Are they?
Okay.
You have gotten them all correct.
Okay, here's your next one.
Rip Wheeler.
A TV show of origin.
Is Rip Wheeler?
A Baltimore Oriole or a character on Yellowstone.
I just don't say you got to get this?
Oh, no.
tell Chris Ryan.
I don't watch Yellowstone.
I'm going to say that's the character
from Yellowstone. You gave it away.
You did. Unbelievable. You have to help me
with one of them now. Okay.
Five and O.
All right. Crushing it.
That's Cole Houser.
Rip Wheeler. He's the best.
I love Cole Houser. I know. Okay.
Dame Barbara Woodward.
Did you say Dame?
How many people with titles become vampires?
This is tough because I really am committed to saying vampire for all of them
and then hopefully getting at least four right.
Just to avoid complete embarrassment?
But how sick would a vampire who's a dame?
If you're a dame, do you commit yourself to public service?
I don't know.
Don't you just suck people's blood for fun after sex?
In sport?
vampire.
That is a UN appointee.
So I have I own the two UN ones,
but then I was just like,
I landed on just saying vampire
at all of them.
Okay, here's your next one.
So maybe not the strategy.
Probably not.
Chris was right, as always.
Okay, here's your next one.
Rafe Cameron.
Is Rafe Cameron
a Baltimore Oriol
or a character on Outer Banks?
Mallory made me watch
a season of Outer Banks
as like a hazing ritual
when I enjoyed the ringer.
Literally three days before you started at the company.
You had a lot going on and I was like, this isn't an important thing that we
are going to talk about.
And you were like, this is required.
We have not discussed it since.
No.
Until right now.
Can you give you the name again?
Rafe.
Rave Cameron.
Is Rave Cameron a Baltimore Oriole or a character on the Outer Banks?
That sounds like an Oriole to me.
She finally missed.
Oh, nice.
Oh, man.
Bill Compton.
Vampire.
Yeah.
Yeah. You're right.
Your poker face is bad, audience.
All right, here's one. Ready for this one?
Yeah.
George Russell.
Is George Russell an Oriole?
Yeah.
Or a character on the Gilded Age.
Oh. Or an F1 driver.
Don't worry. I know that he's a character on the Gilded Age.
I do send you a lot of pictures of him.
Yeah, you do.
It's like so handsome. It's insane.
Also an F1 driver.
Also, there was like a literal swoon.
from the middle of the audience.
I know.
I shouldn't have picked someone so, like, unbelievably handsome.
Okay.
Also, I probably shouldn't have picked that one on Emmy Nam Day.
Gilded Age.
Best drama.
Let's go.
Wild.
You do know all the shows I don't watch.
I feel really seen and unknown.
She's like, I'm picking TV characters.
I was like, I watch a lot of television, Mallory.
I don't watch Gilded Age.
Okay.
Jasper Hale.
Jasper Hale?
Vampire.
That's a vampire.
That is a vampire.
That is a.
baseball playing vampire.
That is a Confederate soldier
baseball playing vampire.
I remember that baseball scene.
I remember that baseball scene.
Okay.
Here's your next one.
Hoyt Wilhelm.
Is Hoyt Wilhelm
a Baltimore Oriole or a character
on hell on wheels?
I'm just going to guess
baseball player because if your name is Hoyt
and you're not a baseball player,
I don't feel like you're living your life right.
It's a knuckle baller.
Way back when.
Of course he is.
Last one, last round?
I have two left.
Okay.
But I could just give you one if you want to have fewer total points at the end.
That's up to you.
Since you've gotten almost all of them.
All right, what's your next one?
Hit me.
Klaus Miklson.
U.N.
That's a vampire.
Damn it!
See, this is why you never, ever move away from the game script.
Ever.
He's one of the original vampires.
If you say so.
Yeah, damn it.
All right.
Last one.
You know, some offensive coordinators, they have like 15 plays to open the game, but then they wing it, and I tried.
No.
No.
Lesson learned.
All right.
Your next one.
Boog Powell is Boog Powell, a Baltimore Oriole or a Boardwalk Empire character.
Okay, but I have watched Boardwalk Empire.
But it was a long time ago.
But do I remember Boardwark Empire?
Boog, what a great name.
that feels like an orio
correct great
not only a famous orio but now
the proprietor of booge's barbecue
which you've definitely heard me mention before
you mentioned that a million times
I talk about it a lot okay I'm sorry
I talk about it a lot it's delicious
love a pit beef sandwich all right I have one more for you
do you have one more
yeah let's do it
do I say Russell Edgington
no
vampire that's a vampire
Tiffany the weather
Yeah. Here's your last one.
Yep.
Harry Selden. Is Harry Selden a Baltimore Oriol or a character on Foundation?
That's so mean.
That's for you and the three people who tweeted us a lot about foundation.
All from Ben Lindberg's burners.
I'd say that's a foundation character.
I think I gave it away by saying that it's for the people who tweeted us.
very specifically about foundation.
Okay, great stuff.
You only miss one.
Love that for me.
You missed more than that, but you have six points.
Okay, I thought it would get zero.
I'm thrilled.
All right, the next game is where we're going to ask you guys for some help.
We're calling this, I'm calling this Red Light, Green Light.
We're about to pitch three spinoffs based on characters from IP that we love.
We'll each pick one of each other's.
and at good faith picking the best one.
And then you guys are going to vote on what the best of those two are.
Mallory, want to hit me with your first spinoff?
Sure.
So I have designed all of mine specifically for one purpose,
and it is to make Joanna happy.
I am calling these sidepiece spinoffs,
and they're all about Joanna's personal faves.
Okay.
There's like when we were South By and you made a musical out of all of my personal faves.
I'm just unused to this.
You're like leaving L.A. in a few weeks I have like separation anxiety already,
and I just love you so much.
Okay, here's the first one.
Yeah.
Kitchen Confidential Heron Hall.
This is, yeah, basically a way to give you a television show
that is centered around your favorite characters and your favorite things,
specifically Sir Simon Strong, Alice Rivers,
and just weird heron haul shit and, like, mashed up where wood leaves.
So you would have, like, the flavor lab where Alice is in the stores,
and she's mixing things and making new, like, garnishes.
would have the menu setting where like the poor chef who had to sit there in the shadows and listen
to the no red currents line we would see how the shame consumed him and warped his life we would get
to see what it was like for the servers who have to like just pour wine as damon targaryen is
ogling them envisioning his dead wife second dead wife the dining experience right aged venison
black cabbage
possibly poisoned peas
you can decide whether or not you want to be
felled by them this is my first pitch what do you think
I love it I have a counter for you
okay is it about home repairs
because fixer upper her hair and hall was in the running for me
I'm calling this
ghost therapy
heron hall
um
Alice Rivers we don't know how old she is
and frankly
we're unclear as
to how long she will be around.
She is just sort of that kind of person.
We don't know.
And so what if Alice and her ghost therapy survive to the Game of Thrones era?
Okay.
Love it.
And what if some of your favorite characters just swing by Harren Hall to be like,
maybe I can run Harren Hall?
Great.
What if John Snow swings by Harren Hall and he's haunted by Ghost who can talk and say,
why did you kind of forget about me, John?
What was that about?
Dyerwolf-based therapy.
Oh, boy.
That would be a lot for me.
What if Brienne swings by
and the Ghost of Jamie Linister is there?
We could bring back all,
in the most, in the crassest
IP grab of all time,
we could bring back all of your favorite,
preferably dead Game of Thrones character
for ghost therapy.
Would John see Eagret
specifically by a water feature?
I think,
I think Eagret and Dineris...
Like, what rating does this show up?
I think,
Oh, Lord's kissing all day long if you prefer.
Egrat and Dineris at the same time, though.
Like, what's that about?
I mean, it's Thrones.
Feels like it could work.
My English teachers are just here.
Next.
Okay, here's my second pitch for you.
It is called Pitch Perfect Middle Earth.
And it is a musical competition show set in Middle Earth,
where we will see a number of different acts performed head to head.
So, for example, our beloved Poppy would sing this wandering day,
but she wouldn't do it just sheerly for our pleasure and our enjoyment.
She would be going head to head with Mary and Pip,
singing about the Green Dragon.
Perhaps Thor and Oaken Shield would make an appearance to sing about the Misty Mountains.
The size of the cast and the competition set is really up to you.
Pitch perfect, Middle Earth.
Absolutely love it.
I love that you make everything a musical for me if you'll know and seen and loved.
Sylvie on Loki
comes back and fixes the TVA
and we get to do all the fun of the TVA
we're leaving Loki where he is
and Sylvie and all of your favorites
from Loki are here to travel through time
and have adventures and multiverses
and fix everything. Okay.
Okay. Are the Russo Brothers inter-direct?
I don't know. It depends how poorly
their next Netflix movie does.
God. Okay. I like it. I like it.
Here's your third and final.
Yeah.
Consideration.
Bachelor in Paradise, Brenda.
Let's let the Hot Star Wars characters fuck.
Yeah.
Let's put a winner here.
I think I'm a winner here.
Why settle for just one hookup?
I was thinking should this be a more traditional Bachelor or Bachelor,
but the great thing about Bachelor in Paradise is they all fuck each other, right?
So, yeah.
Some might say in terms of the mics
and the ability to hear what any of them are saying
too many water features,
but I like where you're going with that.
Let's get Chimer and OSHA
on Bachelor and Paradise, Brendock.
Let's get OSHA and Jackie
to also have a date
Bachelor and Paradise Brendoc.
Let's get Yord out there to fuck everyone.
Yordhoard!
Come on down to the forest.
Wow, I didn't know the Yord horde came out
on a Wednesday night.
I love that.
I want Mog.
Oh, the space twink?
Yes.
Mag is invited.
To Bachelor or Paradise, Brenda, Brenda.
Is Basel invited?
Thank you.
A bridge too far.
Thank you.
Even we have limits.
Basil can, like, he can be there for the comic relief of, because they're all going
to fuck each other, and then there's going to be a lot of love triangles and jealousy.
And if somebody is suspicious and is, like, where is OSHA?
they can use Basel that way.
You find him in the boom boom room.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And it's like, is that ocean or is that May only Khymir knows?
Who can say?
Great.
I had a similar plan, but it's, I think, just blatantly worse than yours,
which is bear girls but make it Kimer.
And it's just him outdoors, largely shirtless, doing things.
That's it.
That's just it.
the pitch. I'm enthusiastic about
the idea. I'm enthusiastic
about the idea. I don't even want to put this to a vote because I
think you already won, so let's just give a round
applause for... Bachelor Paradox,
Braddock. I would watch all of these shows.
All of them. Guess what? I have
hot news for you. Tell me. Running long, who could have guess?
Who could have possibly
a effing guess? We only have one bit left.
Just one round.
Okay. We've got a round of
two truths in the line. It's hot take edition.
Oh boy.
Okay.
Do you have your hottest spicy as take?
Now I have to pick.
Let's see.
Only one.
What is spiciest?
I told Joanna earlier when we were prepping.
She asked me how spicy my picks were and I said,
I just genuinely don't know if I, like, have the barometer for knowing what, like,
a weird thing to say out loud into a microphone is.
Just give it how I spend the bulk of my time.
It's true.
Okay, let's just, I have a few different vibes here,
but let's just build off Bachelor and Paradigms.
I'm going to give you two truths and a lie, sex and ships edition.
Yep.
Okay.
Yep.
Do you want me to not do this because your English teacher is here?
I think Phil's doing fine.
Go ahead.
Phil, how are you?
You're hanging in?
Yeah.
Oh, boy.
Tough night for Phil.
Okay.
Tough night for Phil.
Okay.
Here they are.
My two truths and a lie.
All of my favorite game of Thrones couples.
involve
incest
this is a safe space right
sharing among friends
okay
spoiler for Battlestar
galactica
I believe
that Rosalin
and Adama's sex scene
is the best and most important
sex scene
in the history of story
and I should be clear
Rosalin and Adama's
geriatric sex scene
is the best and most important
sex scene in the history of story
Correct.
And I believe,
this is my last one,
I believe that Winter Soldier,
a shared favorite of ours,
is a genuinely,
actually, truly,
not hyperbolicly,
perfect movie,
save for one missing scene.
A roadside blowjup.
On the way to camp play.
Okay, Mallor is like,
we can't play this game
because you know everything about me
and now I'm saying that's true
because it's easily one.
I know that your favorite Game of Thrones couples are not all incest couples.
They could be.
A lot of them are.
A lot of them are.
I was like, maybe she'll get tripped up on the difference between a lot and all.
Most in all.
Guess what?
Several many?
Yeah, correct.
I would say it's like a healthy 70%.
Right.
But like Jorrah, Brian and Jamie.
Yeah, Brian and Jamie are they might be the only non-incest couple to make the top five, honestly.
Last thing we're to do.
What's yours?
I'm going to do overrated.
Three overrated.
Okay.
Exciting.
I think Deadpool is overrated.
As a character or a film?
Property.
This is the response that you were hoping to.
I said spicy hot takes and Mallory's like,
I like it when people are related, fuck.
All right.
Is that in any other room, maybe?
Hundreds of strangers.
Okay.
I think.
My pal.
Okay.
I think Dune is overrated.
The first film?
Or the property?
Property.
I think Grogo is overrated.
I actually, I think I know this one.
What is it?
Because I do believe that you think,
I know you think Grogu was overrated.
You once asked on a podcast that people could hear
if he was a character or a prop,
hard by it.
And also unsure of the answer.
I was like in shock.
Like my face, I'm actually like having a heart palpitation right now.
remembering it.
So that's a true thing
that you astonishingly believe
and I think you believe
the Deadpool is overrated.
But I know you do not think
Dune is overrated.
I do think Dool is overrated.
I like Deadpool.
I think Deadpool is overrated.
Make sure you tune in
for our coverage of Deadpool in two weeks.
Well, I don't think Rulverine is overrated.
Okay, that answers my question.
Who had the spiciest take?
Boy.
Mallory?
Round of applause.
I get awesome.
things.
Wasn't going to be able to shock them.
Deadpool is overrated
is a brave thing to say.
Thank you.
Or me.
Did I have the slices?
I think.
But here's the fucked up
part of this.
You get to keep Grogo
you just admitted
you think is horseshit.
Maybe you'll be more
competitive next time.
And did I say horseshit?
No, I said mildly overrated.
Let's bring out the Midnight Boys.
Pugh!
So we're going to do Q&A,
questions from the audience.
And if you want to raise your hand,
we've got a couple
mic runners.
running around, incredible folks, and we will point you out.
We've got someone right here in the front row if we have a mic close enough to the front
row.
Are you wearing a hoth t-shirt, but like an icy?
Hell yeah.
That's a great shirt.
What flavor?
Cherry, blue raspberry.
Good stuff.
Good stuff.
I mean, there was no wrong answer.
Okay.
Okay.
Oh.
Okay.
My question pertains to small balls.
Yeah.
Yep.
If your small ball for the small council could be made of any fictional or real substance in the universe, what would your personal small ball be made of?
What a great question.
That's a great question.
Oh my God.
I love this.
This is actually really hard.
Like, I want to say Valerian Steel, but I think my answer is like jumbo lump crab meat.
With the dusting of old base seasoning, because then I would always, I would have like the thing that we're up.
presented my soul and identity.
Also a snack.
But can you...
Those are long meetings.
Okay, can you now do an impression
of what it would sound like for you to put your
lump of crab meat into
the holder to start the meeting?
What does that sound like, Mallory?
Great.
Great, great stuff.
I know it's smell crazy in there.
Jomey. What's yours?
Tungsten.
Super heavy.
It'd be like a little workout every time...
Right there.
Van, are you ready?
Flesh light.
What's getting done at this small council meeting?
Anything I want, bro.
I want an everlasting gobstopper.
Ooh.
You know, just...
See what I'm saying?
I didn't...
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, wait.
See what I'm saying?
I didn't.
See how much worse that was?
I didn't like it, Charles.
Oh, my answer is boring.
I think some vibranium.
I think I could fuck some shit up.
Vibranium?
Yeah.
Great pick.
Yeah, I'm going to go with Unubtanean.
Hell yes.
Yeah, yeah.
Nice.
Great picks.
All right.
We've got a hand up right over there.
Grab a mic, sort of third row towards the edge there.
You got it.
He's coming to you.
My question is, if you were to start a house in Westeros, what would your sigil be?
Easy.
This is easy.
It would be my cat.
It would be Halo.
Oh, yeah.
Without question.
Would yours be Bozeman?
Would yours be sushi?
Would yours be bug? Would yours be Finn?
Nah, I love Bozeman, but Bozeman kind of
a bitch. Don't do that.
Don't do that. Okay, so now we know that Vann just
says things. Don't do that. No.
Van just literally says things because that's not true.
I know it's not true. Oh, you guys.
If somebody
walks into the house to try to steal the TV,
Bozeman will make a new friend.
He's a doodle. They're not the best guard. So it wouldn't be
Boseman. Bozeman would be a part
of my, you know,
house, but he couldn't be on the
sigil, everybody would be fucking over.
I'm trying to think of what it would be.
What would be good, man?
Maybe like a picture of Gucci Man?
Okay, okay.
Honestly, I'd be the Cisco
house.
Come on, man.
I heard a rumor that the Midnight Boys are going full
targ for the finale,
right? That's what I heard.
Full wigs? What?
Targaryen wigs? We're going to...
That's what I heard. But I feel like you should go full
Cisco.
me?
Yeah.
Here's a thing.
Yeah.
You know, I'm single,
that ladies of L.A. would love it.
They would love it.
Silver hair?
Yes.
All right, damn.
I'm doing it for you, Joe.
Okay, thanks.
Hell yeah.
I love you, Charles.
Steve.
Okay, it's my cat fin.
I would bend the need of house,
Cisco, though.
I would do that.
What?
I knew you were a problem.
I knew it.
Wow.
This is the type of shit I like.
That's true.
It would be that and a four-ounce cup of the gummy bears that we have at the office.
Those are delicious.
They are good.
They are really good.
Yeah.
We have free gummy bears at the office.
We have no actual food, to be clear.
But we don't eat it.
It's gummy bears all day.
You said it like it was so naughty.
I know.
Yeah.
We have free gummy bears.
I'd say that.
Hmm.
Look at me.
It's a secret.
Joe.
Uh, polybola jelof rice.
Oh, you know.
Yeah, but not, it's Nigerian Jalov.
Not that Ghanian or whatever y'all be eating out there.
Okay?
Yeah, yeah, Kerm, I'm looking at you.
In the eyes.
Come up here really quick.
Kerm, run up here really quick.
None of that, none of that nastiness.
I know y'all be putting peas and keros in y'alls.
Gross.
Dach yourself.
Ew.
Kerm, catching strays while working hard.
Nigerian Jolof only.
Do we have any other Africans in the house?
Hey, we need to settle the Joloff thing.
Like, where are you from, my friend?
Liberian Jolov.
Y'all got the worst Joloff Rice.
That's the worst one.
Nigeria's can't cut.
Let me see you outside.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm the guy dressed like this outside.
Let's talk about it.
Nigerians are very loud.
They're very colorful.
They're very appealing.
Now you know what else they are?
And you know what else they are?
Seriously, by my Nigerians, they're also very giving.
Because I got this email one time.
And it said,
you fell for the full one-nine
you fell for the four one-night
you said he had 30 million for me
I mean to be fair
I do think Liberian Joluff is the best Jalov
I mean you're wrong but that's okay
I mean it's all good but I have a question
in regards to obviously the much malign
kind of D.C.E.U. whoever they're calling it these days
is there a particular movie
that's coming out that you have complete confidence
that you think it's going to be great
And is there a movie in the slate that you know?
Joker Fahlia Jia is going to be amazing.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Get out of here.
What do you guys think about the idea of singing our podcasts, like musical podcasts about that film?
I'll put in my two weeks tomorrow.
I tried to get Joe to talk about Aquaman 2 from a yacht.
I really want to do some like bit-based podcasting around D.C.
A yacht?
Wait, why weren't we invited to the yacht?
Everyone would do a yacht.
You didn't say a yacht, you said a body of water.
Body water, but I thought yacht was like, I believe I said like on succession, you were like, let's go to a puddle and talk about Othoman.
To be clear, I have no connections to yachts of any sort, but I think we could have figured it out.
Honestly, to answer your question, though, Van, you've been very, very negative about Superman, James Gunn.
I'm pro. I think he's going to pull it off. Do you want to defend how angry you've been about these leaks?
Well, first of all, I haven't been angry or negative.
What I've said is, it looked like they got the shit at Party City, and that's facts.
And look, and look, he might make Party City Superman, and it might be off the meat rat.
But as far as right now, I'm just a little bit taken aback by what I've seen so far.
Audience, please remember, this is the guy that defends the Power Rangers Star Wars show Book of Boba Fett.
So do you want, like, why is that okay?
We haven't even seen James Gunn Superman yet.
I'm not going.
I want to get into a whole big thing.
but what I'll say is
the shit looks whack and if it's good
it's good to answer your question
I think that Deadpool and Wolverine
is pretty much a
layup and let me tell you why
there's nothing to do what we're talking about
that's what the question that was asked
DC
Oh DC oh I don't have nothing for you
I got nothing for you
Joe me
I got nothing though
Well they canceled every single good
animated DC
show that ever existed for
uh
see my people are with me come on
so I mean we're gonna have to watch
Creature Commandos so might as well
you know what I mean let's get into Frank Grillo
what? No you guys aren't excited
Wow absolutely crickets I love Frankrylo
I prefer to be food personally
fucking we've all at what cost Joe me come on
Creature Commandos could be serious
I'm not excited either clearly I gave it like
F plus plus or F minus minus
yeah we did yeah you did do that
Stephen
I am very pro-superman.
Apparently, according to these leaks,
it's entirely shot outdoors
and in broad daylight,
because we get a picture every day.
I don't know.
Nathan Philly and his Green Lantern sounds incredible to me,
and I'm with it 100%.
I don't know if he's getting a movie.
I hope he does.
Molly Rubin.
Also Superman for me.
I just have no doubt that movie will be great.
Thank you, Mel.
Hands up.
If you have a question.
right in the back there towards the side.
Thank you so much.
Mike, right behind you.
We have some costumes here.
I know.
You're wearing a crown.
I know.
It's Jay Harris' crown.
Hello.
My name's Sebastian.
I wanted to ask, I wanted to ask Van for some relationship advice.
Wow.
Wow.
I wouldn't have done that.
Okay, so I kind of made a cardinal sin in which
I started a show
without my girlfriend.
Stand up.
Stand up.
We needed to stand up.
How you doing?
Look at you.
Good job, brother.
We started it together.
Okay.
And then it is.
He started to watch it.
We started it together
and then he watched
all the seasons without me.
Can I ask what show this is?
What show was this?
The boys.
Oh.
Okay.
Well.
So what you?
Let them finish.
What you got?
What you're...
I was just saying,
what can I say?
What can I do?
All right.
Now, let me ask you this.
Because this is obviously happened to me before.
So do you have...
Do you guys share all of your shows?
Mostly, mostly.
Okay, what show does she watch that you don't watch?
Sex and the City.
Bridgeton.
Okay, guess what you're doing now, my friend.
Bridgetton.
I mean, it's for a great time.
All right. You're picking one. You're going
Queen Charlotte. What's the hot
Nick? What's the light skin do name?
White skinned. No, no. Reddishon page.
Ray Gay, Raygate. No, it's
not reggae. What's his name?
Ray J. Ray J. You're making me
mess it up. That's how you get back.
And don't do it again. Because I'll be
honest with you, you're living in a community property
state. It costs you a lot of money.
Yeah. Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you.
Anyone over on this side?
I got a question.
Okay, right there.
I mean, the crown.
Yeah.
The Jiharis crown.
Could you tell it was,
or is your eyes like good enough Mallory?
I mean, I can tell there are people here, so.
That is such a good cost.
Yeah, the eye doctor can wait.
There's a person there.
It's a really good crown.
Great job.
Thanks.
My girlfriend made it.
It's beautiful.
Amazing.
I love it.
So my question's about Hot D,
the most recent episode five.
There's been a lot of discussion from other podcasters and YouTubers I follow
about the sexual tension between Damon and Willem Blackwood.
Oh.
And I want to hear, do you guys think that Damon's flirting with Blackwood,
or do you think he's just murder sexual and turned on by war crimes?
I mean, I mean, the real...
Why not both?
Why not both?
I think is the real question.
But yeah, he got that, like, that Damon smirk on his face that he gets when he's, like,
about to do a murder, and he's like...
I left my hoodie at home.
Can you take care of this?
The way he leaned in specifically to say,
you take my meaning with like the wide eyes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then he comes back like,
babe,
you weren't supposed to do that?
Van,
do you want to weigh in?
I don't know who William Blackwood is.
He's the one he's just like,
hey, yo,
could you commit some war crimes?
There's some things the crown cannot be meant to be seen doing.
After all the motherfuckers walked away from the dragon.
When the Brackens left.
And then Willem is like,
the Brackens are people hatched from this,
deepest.
Do you think, I mean,
oh, he's the guy
that walked away
when the drag...
No, no, no,
the other guy who hates him.
And then Willem was like,
why didn't you kill him?
They made their choice.
Who can remember?
Sorry, to quote Damon,
who can remember?
Do you think that
Damon having,
you know,
a beautiful love affair
with Willem Blackwood,
would that bring peace
to the Riverlands?
Or would the Brackens then get jealous?
I'm just,
I'm not jealous.
If he ordered all of that stuff,
like that...
What do you think Willam would think
of the fact that
Damon dreams he's fucking his mom.
He's got some
explaining to do.
He will never tell
Oh yeah, he won't tell anybody that.
What if you bring a bracken into the thruple?
You know?
Love conquers all.
A dream thruple. Yeah. Okay.
Love it. Love that.
Literally, I hope that happens the next episode.
Great.
Right over there.
Sorry, I should be more specific.
In the middle of the crowd,
stage left,
the mic's coming to you.
right on the end.
Jesse.
Hi, this is a relitigation question.
So three drafts on,
I want to go back to the first
and ask, should Charles have been able
to pick piccolo?
Wait, who? Say that again?
The first...
Should Charles have been able to pick piccolo?
In the first black kind of draft.
All right, yes.
Yes.
All right.
Chuck, go ahead.
No, no, no, Van.
You're already stepping on me.
Go.
It's a good question.
It's a great question.
really good question. I think at the time
you know, I don't live with regret.
The third
black superhero draft taught us
a very important lesson. There are
not enough black people. It's not that
deep. It's not like we got it.
You know, you pick Dark Vader
and we're picking Simba. It got bad.
It got really dark. Towards the end of it,
we started to realize
that, you know, we have a long way to go.
So maybe
if we went back,
we would let Pick a Logo. But at that time,
that was the first drive.
I still don't think you can take Optimus Prime, though.
You definitely can take Optimus Prime.
I don't know.
What do you think?
Yeah, you, white man, is Pickle-O-Black?
Welcome to the club, buddy.
Can you just tell when...
Can you just tell by the voice
when somebody calls you?
I'm going to pass on that one.
Thank you.
Hell yeah.
Good answer.
Any other questions?
We've got one right here in the middle,
front middle.
Is that a Pue Poo shirt?
Oh my God.
Oh, it is?
Wow.
So I'm close to Van's age, so I love the, you know, Van is old bit.
So I want to know what is your all's favorite bit that you guys do during the podcast?
Like, I love when you're schooling all these young pups, you know.
Favorite bit.
Favorite bit.
Honestly, this is going to make me sound very mean.
Anytime we clown on Steve.
It's just like...
My heart gross.
I'm just like, this is the best.
You take it in strides, Steve.
No, yeah, of course.
I really do like...
I tell you what, I loved making
the Van is Old sound drop.
Yes.
Because that is my best friend's son
who was four at the time.
I have recorded consent from his parents,
by the way, from recording his voice.
But, like, he was so enthused
about saying Van is old.
A minor.
A minor.
Thanks for the disclaimer.
buddy you made that really weird
Steve got a weird case
why is he around
you know
yeah yeah
you're like
it's like a weird thing
I'm
um
I think my favorite
my favorite bit is
Jordy Laforge
on a draft
it's just
I mean from that moment
on and every time
we do a draft
there's always one
it's always somebody
who's like
ah yeah
you too much dip on the chip
buddy
I love a Jordy Laforge
you know
my favorite one is
wig watching
let me tell you why
I like, because, yeah, give it up.
But let me tell you why.
Because I would be watching shows with Kalika,
and Kalika, she gets so offended at Wigs.
She's so pissed off.
She, like, used pejoratives.
Like, now that bitch, no, she ain't got no goddamn business on TV with that wig on.
Oh, my God.
This is a mother and a sister.
Like, what are you doing?
So now I notice it every time when you guys start doing it.
Because it's not just with her.
I thought she was mean.
But she's apparently, it's a thing.
Whigwatch is both entertaining
and actual service journalism
I think
I will also say
Steve, you're genius
the call
like
Oh yeah
The mailback cause
Every single time
The call is good
That's good
That's good
Mallory
I'm
I'm afraid to say this
lest I
fan the flames
But genuinely
from the bottom of my heart
Every time I hear
what are we doing here?
That's mine too.
I know I'm in for a treat.
That's mine too.
Every time.
House of our rides for Charles.
We love Charles.
I can't change who I am.
I'm sorry, guys.
Thanks for riding with me.
All right, we have time for one more question.
I think I see one towards the back there.
Right towards the back?
All the way to back there.
Hello, everyone.
Oh.
No, no, no.
Oh, God, why?
You know what?
So I just want to say thank you to Van, Charles, and Steve for looking after Jeremy for us.
He does have a family in you guys.
Let me tell you that, for real.
And Jeremy?
Yes, Mom.
Happy birthday.
Oh.
Oh, it's a whole thing.
It's a whole combats.
Look at the family.
Look at the game.
You came on your dad's
ninth wedding anniversary.
That's true.
And today happens to be our
31st wedding anniversary.
Give it up.
Yeah.
That was the best birthday gift you ever,
the best anniversary gift you ever got.
Absolutely.
No.
Correct.
And we want to let you know
that we truly do love you
from the bottom of our heart.
Thank you so much.
Your sister flew from Dallas
with her business schedule to come and be with you here today.
So you know, that has to be very important for her to do.
Yes.
And your brother too.
And then your friends are came as well.
So do you guys have a question?
Absolutely.
Yes, we do.
Also, I know he's not here, but I wouldn't have been able to do this without Keith.
Shout out Keith.
Keith!
Keith, that's right.
Thank you for putting this together as well, Helen.
Thank you.
Yes, thank you.
So if you could join us and just singing Happy Birthday to Jomey as a group.
Yeah.
Come on.
Okay.
One, two.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Which version of Happy Birthday?
We're going to start with the traditional.
We were doing a whole thing.
You were jumping ahead.
I'm winning.
I'm winning.
Two.
He never been to a family birthday before.
Okay.
Okay.
People have to go home.
Traditional.
One, two, three.
Happy birthday to you.
Whose idea?
Who's idea was this?
Happy birthday, dear Jomi
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to ya
Happy birthday
Happy birthday
to you
Thank you guys.
Love you.
Thank you to Joey's family, including his sister who came from Dallas.
Your time is up, buddy.
Yield your time to the chair, champ.
Love you guys, thank you.
Any last words from anyone you're on the stage before we go?
Brother, you've been trying to, what you got to say, man?
Just say, just saying, I've been looking.
We owe you a deep shout up.
Hey, let me tell you something right now.
I'm promising you, there's a movement starting tonight.
This is the last thing I said.
We've got to go.
The declassification movement is coming.
The answer is no.
The answer is no.
The answer is no.
It is my goal in 2025.
I am.
If you guys vote and support me
to have all the deep shadow protocol files
declassified and aired
for your listing approval.
And you'll see,
I'm not the only degenerate in the midnight
I'm not boys.
