The Ringer-Verse - Minecraft, ‘The Last of Us’ and The Game Adaptations We Want | Mint Edition

Episode Date: April 7, 2025

Jomi and Steve are joined by Jessica Clemons for another addition of here comes the pitch! In celebration of 'The Last of Us' season 2 and 'A Minecraft Movie,' the squad is pitching their best video game adaptations. Host: Jomi Adeniran and Steve Ahlman Guest: Jessica Clemons Producer: Jonathan Kermah Additional Production Support: Arjuna Ramgopal Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to the brand new Zach Lowe show. That's right. I'm back to have the same in-depth NBA conversations you're used to. We're going to talk about the games, the X's and O's, the drama, the playoffs are coming up. And now you get to see every episode in full on video on Spotify and on my own YouTube channel. Episodes drop every Monday and Thursday with a collection of guests you're going to love. So make sure you follow and subscribe to the brand new Zach Lowe show on Spotify. or wherever you watch or listen to your podcast. Let's go!

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Visit spectrum.com slash business to learn more. Restrictions apply. Services not available in all areas. Hello and welcome into the ringerverse. Your Nexus feed for all things. Fandom, I'm Steve Alman. I'm Jimmy Dineran. And cutting it, we're cutting right into it.

We're joined by the wonderful, the Immaculate, the lovely. Jessica Clemens. I'm here for chaos. Chaos. Chaos. Is that all you're here for? You're not here to free. order a switch thinking that we have the hookup?

Wait, do you guys got the hook up? No, we don't. That'd be crazy. I was like, wait, y'all got the hook up. I'm going to buy it. And then it's going to be bad. Not bad, but it's going to be like, oh, the Switch 2 is, Switch 2 part 2 is going to come out not long after.

Oleg Switch 2. And I'm going to be like, damn. See, here's the, I like, I tried to justify myself. This is a Mitch edition, by the way. Oh. You sure? Yeah, yeah. Is the House of R?

No, no, no, no. We're absolutely not. Thankfully, we're not. No, no, no. What's wrong with Al-O-R? Well, no, no, it's more of being like, man, House of R really, really backpedaled. Jesus Christ.

Damn. Tough. Tough. Oh, no. But thank you for listening to Mint Edition. Once again, we're here with Jessica Clemens and Jomey. We're going to be talking about video games, video game adaptations,

and the wonderful things that are going to be coming out to you this week. We're going to be giving you a great game of Here Comes the Pitch, one of our favorite games ever, because, in honor, of Minecraft, only Minecraft, not the last of us. Not last of us. The real cinema coming out this April.

Yeah. We're going to be giving you some of the more unconventional things that we would love to see a big or small screen adaptation for in the world of video games. It's the new frontier. It's not going away.

There have been a lot. There have been a lot of video game adaptations that I forgot about that we did. Yeah, man. And you're in your research for this, Jess or Jomey, have you seen anything? We're like, oh my God, we actually did put the rock in a Doom movie.

Well, it's not that. It's less that. It's more of like all the stuff I thought didn't have an adaptation or, but then it turns out they were working on one that just never got made. Right. We've been working out of God of War for a while. There's going to be a mass effect. Like, they're just like, oh, we've got a director attached.

We've got writers attached. That was 400 years ago. Right. The movie has never seen the lot of day. Amazon bought the rights and we're like, let's sit on this for a second. Right. They did it like the studio. when Seth Rogen's character bought the Jonestown movie

for Martin Scorsese, he was like, I own it now, you can't make it. Basically what I found out. Just to make him cry. Just to make Martin Scorsese cry. How dare you. And even that went on for two hours too long. Well, oh, okay.

Jesus Christ. Watch the Irishman of crying. Jess, anything in your world that you're like looking forward to seeing? I know we've got the last of us on the horizon. We've got Minecraft coming out. As we're looking to play this game, anything that we're just like, oh, man, if the Netflix Bioshock thing actually happens,

is that going to be cinema or is that going to be terrible? I don't know if I trust Netflix doing a Bioshock, just based off the cameras that they're only allowed to use their own. Isn't that a weird thing? They banned certain cameras? They only use their own camera, or not their own, but these specific cameras, which I think are fine cameras.

I'm just not looking for that look on Bioshock. You're underground. but otherwise, or just dark and muddled and gross and there's a bunch of spirits everywhere. I don't need it to look like Emily and Paris. What's wrong with looking like Emily and Paris? You don't like that show for a recent. Everything is wrong with being like Emily and Paris. Why are you defending this now?

You hate that show now. I mean, I've always hated the show. Then why would you ever defend Emily and Paris? That was the entire point of the exercise. You were like, I was just joking. It's not joke. I mean, the least thing it looks great because I've been to Paris. It does not look like that on TV

Or in real life It does not look like that in real life You're like man Paris look nice man We have been lied to about Paris Oh yeah Paris is a literal rat hole You know what I mean

Like it's not the worst It's not ever been to You know what I mean But they clean it up The streets is clean Emily of Paris It's not that clean in real life You're like I want to see

Where they put in the food In the sewers And getting out and beating it to people Look if teenage me and Ninja Turtles They would exist in Paris Oh 100% Yeah try to put them in New York Is insane

They definitely are for Paris. They're real in Paris. No, I haven't, but going back to like if I'm looking for it. It's mainly just the Last of Us right now because there's not really like, that's like asking me like if Last of Us wasn't here, why I'd be excited for Borderlands? Like I'm like, there's not really a lot of adaptations coming out that I'm as stoked for as Last of Us, if that makes sense. Last Was is just always going to be my top one right now. Not only is it the best one, it's kind of been the exception that kind of starts off the idea that video video game adaptations actually can be good. and it's not only are they commercially viable,

but they're awards and critical darlings. And I think that we've got a couple of hits on our hands here, but before we get to that, I want to get you some programming reminders. It's coming up on the Ringiverse feed. We're about to go into Last of Us land, but before that, tomorrow, ButtonMash is back with their reactions to the Minecraft movie.

Jomi and I will be a part of that, as well as Jess. I've only heard good things. Yes. I've only heard immaculate things. I've actually heard okay things. Like, it's surprisingly not as terrible as, we thought it was going to be. No, people are telling me that this is the movie of the summer. Um, yeah. Wow.

That's great. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, what? Mike, people are telling me the Minecraft. Is the movie of the summer? It's the movie of the summer. And it's only in April. I'm gonna take your water and dash it in your water. What's in that, what is in that water? Yeah, what's in that water? He was on crack. That's a little Stephen A. Smith for you.

I had to stop. I had to stop. On Wednesday, Midnight Boys are going to be back, giving you their daredevil reactions once again and on Thursday House of R has their daredevil deep dives as well where can people find more of that to keep all the updates in their news feeds in their nerves feeds as

glowerlla would say what's up what's up we're speedy at no they can find us at Instagram at Twitter at TikTok and on Facebook at Ring averse

make sure to follow again If you're listening on Monday, that means that the first Mission of Possible Monday has dropped on social. Yeah, we're going through every single Mission Impossible leading up to Mission Impossible, the Final Reckoning. Hell yeah, dude. I'm doing the rewatch, and so I'm going to give my rankings of every single Mission Impossible movie on Mondays. It's out of five cruises. Okay. So, you know.

Is it sprinting legs? No, no, no. It's just I'm going to rewatch it, and then I'm going to rank it like, I'm, I'm, how much did I enjoy the movie out of five cruises. Okay. So I don't want to spoil nothing, but we're doing the first one. We're listening to The First Ones out today.

Check it out. Are you going to give Mission Impossible One the respect that it deserves and put it in the top half of Mission Impossible? Well, it's a little difficult to do that at this point. But I'm probably not. That's so wrong. Again, I don't want to follow it. I like it.

All right. There's some hits. If you want to fight with Jome, you can do it on IG. And anywhere socials are found for the Ring Reverse. But for now, we're going to be coming at you with a friendly neighborhood spoiler warning. Just for some light spoilers about the plot of some of your favorite video games, we're kind of going to go all over the board here. But if you kind of want to not be spoiled on some of the broader stroke plot lines of maybe some of these games,

we've got a couple of ideas that are more story-rich. A couple of it aren't, but still, be warned. and we're going to get right into it with here comes the pitch. So with April coming around the corner with some of the most successful video game adaptations that we're going to have, we know Minecraft is going to make a lot of money.

We know The Last of Us is going to do gangbusters at the box office and at the Emmys, probably. We would assume. Maybe. Pedro's going to get his gold somewhere. It's a tough year, man. It's going to be a tough year. I don't know if you're watching this little show called Severance.

You know. Or the pit. Or the pit. The pit. Which you refuse to watch. I'm not watching the pit. The pit is too, it's not that is dramatic. I just can't watch it because I'm like, oh yeah, this can actually happen.

Yeah. It's gnarly. It's real. When they have to, there's an episode where they have to immediately quick change up everything because a mass shooting happens at a festival and they have to bring everyone in. And I went. That happened in real life. I don't like that.

I'm like, it's drama. You know what? I'm just going to watch Futurama again. Nah. Is it watched you drunk? I'm sad. I don't want to be. It was, it's so scary.

It's so scary. I can't watch the pit. For coverage of the pit, check out Prestige TV podcast. There you go, there you go. Joe's doing some great work over there. Rob Mahoney, too, yeah. Oh, yeah. Prestige TV.

But we are going to be coming at you with our, here comes the pitch version of games that we would love to see adapted for the big or small screen. So we have a couple of rules here. Every pick is known to each, every one of us, because we don't want to have any overlap here. The pick has not. has to have never had or be in development for a major TV or television adaptation. So there's been word of a god of war thing in development at Amazon. There's a mass effect going on. There's a Bioshock that we mentioned before in Netflix.

Anything that we've gotten like remote word of stuff like that, that's going to be off the table just for the sake of us having a fresh and new perspective of what an idea that we can bring to the table is. We've got to specify whether or not it's a TV or movie adaptation. We're going to give us the property. We're going to say a general cast list of who it could star, as well as kind of a general plot synopsis, why we think it works and who might direct this?

Where might it live? Is this an HBO joint? Is Warner Brothers picking this up? Is it going to dismantle all of Looney Tunes in order to pick this up? I was going to say, actually, Warner Brothers will pick it up because it's IP. Will it drop an anvil on the animation studios for Looney Tunes in order to make way for, say,

an overcooked adaptation. Yeah, probably not. Maybe not, but we'll see. We're the studio heads. Jess, being our guest of honor, are you ready to present your first fit? Wait, I'm going first. Don't make me go first.

Okay, okay, Jomey. No, Steve, it's your birthday. Mine is so dense. It involves too many questions, and I'm not ready to take upon these questions. Okay. You go first. Oh, so happy birthday.

Well, thank you. Thank you so much. Wait, I didn't mean it like that. Stankman is crazy. Listen, I know I'm over 30 and Jomi's not equipped to love me, but I can't... No, I didn't mean it. I mean, I always call them stinky boys,

but sometimes I call that my dog, so it became too big. I'm just imagining like a shaking, sickly dog, and that's me on my birthday. You give me a little brownie with a candle in it. Oh, what do you mean? Okay, we'll talk about what you're going to do later. Great. All right, well, then I'll kick it off then.

My first pick for a game that I love, that I've always wanted to see adapted, is the game Dishonored. Dishonnered. Dishonored is probably one of my favorite video games ever. It's what we call it a stealth-based immersive sim. It's basically where you pretend to, think of the games like Thief,

think of games like cyberpunk or Dio-X. It's a lot of stealth-driven, world-based narrative while being very action-oriented with having a lot of world-building. What I loved about Dishonered, is that it's very steampunky as well as very grounded in its drama. I've liked a lot of the story elements that it's introduced, like a sort of like lore-based religion, a massive city,

a lot of political intrigue as well as a lot of drama, like I've said before. It came out on the Xbox and PS3, I believe, and it's been one of my favorite games ever. I've loved it all. Has anybody played dishonored? No. Nope. Heard of it? I heard of it, yeah.

Okay. So, it's a bit of an acquired taste of a game, but I think the story that if you look it up, it's really, really fun. Think Assassin's Creed with a bit more narrative-driven. It's about a, basically, like, the Empress of a city has a really hot young boo-thang named Corvo, who they have a daughter with that may or may not actually be your legitimate daughter. Oh. Uh-oh.

Uh-oh. You return back from a long trip, and you, the player character, witness your empress slash, you know, like, lover, get murdered by a group of assassins, and you were framed for their murder. Can't have that. Then you find out that this was basically a coup by her inner circle to overthrow her government, and you got to get revenge. So you hide yourself in. in the deep underbelly of the city. He finds all of the big major players that made this plot. And where the game choices comes into this

is that a lot of his choices, whether or not to deal with his targets lethally or non-lethally, via, you know, deadly superpower means or by ways of, like, exiling them, or getting them sick with the plague, or finding different ways to cast them out of their society, kind of is reflected in the world,

in the city around him. So what I've liked about this is to give the sort of like video game, video game element of your superpowers, this like terrible event basically gets the attention of this like benevolent god that gives you powers. And he intervenes every once in a while, not to sort of like guide you along your path of like, this is the right thing that you should do.

But like he's just kind of like, not really taunts you, but kind of like asks you these interesting questions about like fate and the choices that you'll make and stuff. like that. And I'm like, that's what I like the idea of like, you know, fantasy storytelling of benevolent gods and fate and choice

and all these things. And I think that that makes a pretty good movie. So I want to pitch this as a movie. I kind of want to make this a bit more... It's a very like kind of like bleak and dower game. I kind of want to turn the fun up a little bit. And I want to make it like a little like

swashbuckily, a tiny bit. If we want to think about like the Robert Downey Jr. Sherlock Holmes. We want to think Pirates of the Caribbean. Like, kind of, you know, fun, not as entirely joyful, but like a little, it's got like a little edge to it. Are you with me so far? I'm here. I see it.

Okay. So, for cast members, this game is actually, like, rather star-studded in its voice cast, surprisingly, for, like, no reason. Like, it didn't make that big of a splash when it came out for the fact that it was, like, a very well-regarded game, but nobody talked about the fact that there was a lot of star power in the, like, principal voice cast. the original voice cast for this game playing like random bit parts

and not like the main cast was, just to start off, Susan Sarandon, Rosario Dawson. Oh my God. Sam Rockwell. Oh, hell yeah. Vincent Dinoffreo.

Unnecess. What, this is unnecessary. Why is it so? And Pedro Pascal. No big fucking deal. Well, these, and that was during, this is during like Game of Thrones time. So this is Pedro being like, probably expensive.

I mean, not like, not expensive. expensive. Not expensive as he is now. You already got students to Rand and Sam Rockwell. And then you're like, you know what? Our least billed person is in Game of Thrones. I swear to you, like he was like the least important person in this game to voice somebody for no reason. So now you can't get any of those people at least not even for the same rate, God forbid, but not even. Exactly.

Well, yeah, would it be live action? Turn the price all to lay up. And if you've done any sort of tertiary Googling, this is a very like costume heavy and setting. You got to think a lot of old-timey practical sets with a lot of steam punky little technologies built into it. So this is already going to be pretty expensive. I'm thinking like a bit more of a visual blockbuster here. But I think my cast is going to be a little bit cheaper than A-list.

Okay. If you find me, I don't want to undercut anybody. But again, I'm thinking like a bit of a reasonable blockbuster budget here. All right? B-list can still be expensive. Very true. Very true. But so for my main cast, playing Corvo Otano,

our main hero. The hot one? The hot one. Okay. Anson Mount. Let me look this person out. You know him. You know Hanson Mount.

You know Anson Mout. Star Trek, baby. Yeah. Oh. Mr. Hare. Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm. Okay. Continue.

The numbing sounds that Jess just made means that she approved. I approve. Playing the role of the benevolent god, the outsider, Bill Scarsgard. Oh, fun. He can be creepy. He can be goofy.

He can be all together. The rookie. Is he the Adams family? Basically, Bill actually would make a pretty good Gomez Adams. He could do any part. He really can't do anything. Even Wednesday? Yeah, I think he made a great Wednesday.

That's the real role that we're missing out. Put him in details. It's a little dark black little pink tues. It's Wednesday Adams, but he's dressed exactly like he did. He was in John Wick 4 with all those crazy suits. And that blue suit was crazy. He had that thing. I was with the red suit.

He had that thing. Oh, man. Guys, you need to Google Red suit Bill Scars Guard, John Wick 4. He had those fits on, man. A true visual feast. To play Emily Caldwin, our daughter, I'll be honest, I don't know who this person is. Brooklyn Price.

She's been in a couple of Netflix things. She seems very good. I saw her acting reel. It's pretty nice. You literally looked up her acting room? Yeah. Well, I just saw like a sizzle of things that she was in. I was like, all right, she looks pretty good.

Playing Hiram Burroughs, an ally of Corvo, Charles Dance. Oh. Dowd, the villain that. kills the Empress and the guy that you're like mainly hunting for most of the game and movie, Carl Urban. Ah, okay, I'm in it.

Carl Urban, I think a great kind of foil for Anson Mount. Does it keep the accent? The O'I Huey accent. I mean, that's a little bit more cocky. I mean, I was talking about his Australian accent. Oh, yeah. See, sure, he could,

but I could also think of it as kind of doing like one of those like brash American accents, like he was doing in Star Trek. I mean, he's not brash, though. It wasn't... Damn it, I'm a doctor, Jim. Yeah, it wasn't brash.

I think he can do it. I definitely think he can do it. But the only reprising role playing Granny Rags. Granny Rags is like an old witch that Corvo encounters on the city streets that, like, actually kind of fucks with him

in a really interesting way, is going to be played by Susan Sarandon. Oh, bring her back. Yes, bringing her back. And then, so like, one of the... highlighted pieces of the movie that I wanted to is like a recurring, not a recurring,

but like it's one of my favorite missions in this entire game and one of the favorite things I've ever done in a video game. It's basically you are, you get this in, like you sneak into this fancy nobles party hosted by one of these like fancy women called, oh my God, by Lady Boyle. Lady Boyle.

Susan Boyle. No, not by Susan Boyle. But she's basically like hosting. a murder mystery party, and she has two twin sisters, so triplets, and all three of them are dressed in like these red, white, and black outfits, and you have to guess which one is the real Lady Boyle, and they have like these elegant masks and stuff, and it's like been this excellent thing of like kind of following clues around the house to figure out which one is which. And the cool thing about the game is that it changes.

I digress here. But the person playing that will be Rebecca Ferguson. Oh, I love her. Great, great fan Fatal foil. Great cast. I love this cast. So why I think this movie works, I want it to be visually stunning, a lot of action, murder mystery intrigue.

I think the great directors for these. I'm stuck between two, and I want you to help me with this. Guillermo del Toro. It'll be too freaky. It'll be too freaky. It's a bit too macab. a bit too... Who's the other one?

Who's the other one? Yeah, who's the other one? Park Chan-Wook. From... Director of Old Boy? Oh, yes. Oh, yes, yes, yes. And a bunch of other great Korean dramas.

If you could have split those two. But it's really between... Like, if I could mend that into one person... Yeah, that is that person. That is the perfect person for what you want. I think I want to pick Park Chen Wook. Yeah, I would. He's done a couple of English films as well.

He's very good. I don't know, man. GDT... You could... Because, I mean, you could do like a shape of water, right? But you mentioned you want a movie to be a little bit more light, a little more goofy. You can do Pacific Rim. You know what I mean?

That's true. Just take it, just, you know, notch it up. I mean, notch it down like 10 knots. I don't want to be fighting next in the streets. Yeah, of course not. But you want it to be silly. You want to bright lights. We're having a good time, you know?

Right. I think if you want to, if you want to like get that kind of vibe, GDT, I've seen it. I've seen it. He can do it for sure. I'm just afraid that he might just put. a bit too cute of like a Pinocchio spin on it. And not to say that that's not welcome

but it's not exactly part of my vision. You know, I'm not trying to go all in that way. Right. But yeah, it's one of my favorite games. I think it could be making a great movie. That's my pitch. Who's up next? I can go.

I can go now. We'll go serious with our first pitches. I mean, I could be serious. My second one is a little... This is the point where you're like, all right, now we do a silly one. No, I'm going to do a serious one. I'm going to do a serious one, that I am 100% sure

is actually going to become a series soon. So I'm so sorry for pitching this. I just don't know. We don't know, though. We don't know. So my video game that I chose is Valeran. I've been playing Valoran night and day for a very long time in my life. That's why you can't hop on Marlboro with this.

No, okay. I got home at 8.30 last night and I couldn't jump on. We were super. I've been mating as Spider-Man, so I can't help. Me, Isaiah, Kai, and Kerm went crazy. Oh, Kerm, I'm sorry. We went A-A-O. The fact that Jess

Mains Spider-Man and Marvel rivals is very problematic. No, no, no, now. I did it because I'm tired. I'm tired of getting my ass beat by Spider-Man. I'm so done with it that I'm like, no. The tickle monster, Spider-Man? You had to become the enemy.

To defeat the enemy. I'm doomed to use the tools of my enemy to defeat them. What is that quote? What is that quote where they're like, oh, keep your friends, your enemy, keep them closer? I'm like, no, no, no, I just got to become it. I got to live it. You became what you swore to destroy.

And let me tell you, I hate him. Even though I'm main as him now, I hate him. I hate it. I hate it so much. Okay, sorry. Valerant. On the other side. Valerant. If you play Valerant the game nine times out of ten, and there's a broad statement.

I'll say that before I even say what I'm about to say. You probably don't know that there's an actual lore to the game because when you jump in and play, you're mainly just choosing a character that you really like and just play in the game. But there is actually a linear storyline that goes through every update of the game and every character. And that's basically what I want a series for Ballarin to look like. So at Valoran made by Riot games, same people that made League of Legends that also adapted that into Arcane. Yeah, and this is what I think they're going to do for the next series after Arcane because they're done with Arcane now. I think they're going to make a Valoran game.

And if I got a Valoran game series, this is what I wanted to look like. In the near future, you know, the world that we know it, the global world as we know it is hit with an EMP. And the light from this EMP blinds the world, but it makes the world go. dark for a few hours. Everyone is in pure darkness. Okay. When that first light hit, it came back on, all the lights came back on, everyone's like, oh, we're fine, but left on earth was the substance known as radiant, which is basically like... I thought you just meant substance with to me more. The substance, and she's old, but she's beautiful, and she doesn't see it, and so she's going to start

cutting off her fingers. And she makes nasty milkshakes in the kitchen. She eats chicken like a crazy person. No, they find the substance called Radiance, what basically kind of works like Wakanda's the name. Oh, the magic fruit? No, the material. Unobanium? Vibranium.

Unobtainium. Oh, right. What's up-uptenium? You're too avatar pill. This guy. What's going on here? What's going on here? He's absolutely cooked.

Oh, my God. I knew it was vibranium, but that was funny. Well, it works like vibranium because this material leads to transformations within their government because they're all trying to take control of it, but it also furthers their technology and their weapons. And while they're making, while they're trying to monetize, but also make sure it's not in the wrong hands of people, they make a team called the Ballaratant Protocol,

which are all of the team members of Valerant the game. Okay. And they have to monitor all of the Radiant in the world globally, and they're also realizing, hmm, who actually sent the Radiant? And also, who's hiring us to make sure that normal people don't get to use

this free substance? Interesting. Okay. It becomes a large process. This is the first episode. The linear arc will be realizing that it's owned by a corporation, or they're a corporation, the corporation is known as Kingdom

that gave like three quarters of the globe the power of Radiant which built their houses, give them food, give them power, give them clothes, give them everything, but they're not giving it to every part of the globe. Okay. And Kingdom is making sure no one else gets to use it. They're basically the Hershey Company.

Oh, wow. Yeah, wow. With rain. Pretty dubious stuff there. So, correct me if I'm wrong, this is a television show. Yeah. If I'm going to go the Valerent route

from Arcane. We're thinking Netflix, we're thinking high production budget for animation. Is it live action animation? No, it's got to be Netflix. And it's got to be Arcane level. It's the same animation.

The same art is going to cost a lot of money. And they will. Because this is a billion dollars. The fans of Valerite will tune in and they will watch this. Because the best part about Valorin is every character has a different nationality and comes from a different part of the globe.

Okay, so I don't doubt that Netflix has got the money to spend for this. It's just that we're going to get 18 episodes over the course of five years. Yeah. And it will be a hit. It'll look great. It'll look great.

It'll be a hit. We'll love it. Everybody will scream about it. Cospheres will dress up as it and they will get the greatest voice actors for it. I think you just kind of opened up a little like trauma bond for me and Jomey where we're just like, oh no, we're going to wait like seven years for this season two. We're all going to eat it up. Great. So we're going to love this.

I'm not that woke. And then forget about it for four years. And then they'll finish it very quickly in the second season. then we'll get into it again. And then we'll be like, yeah, this was really fun. And it's not going to make me want to play Valoran. Maybe not. Guess what?

Doesn't have to. Doesn't have to. To be fair, league's a lot more harder and confusing than Valoran. Valoran's very easy. It's a five-minute game where you just run in with five people. It's basically overwhelmed. I love Arcane. I will never touch League of Legends.

I touch League of Legends for a long time in my life in college and I went, wait, why am I doing this? Exactly. I said, wait, why am I doing this? Yeah, I said, I could just turn this off. I could just turn this off. I could just turn this. this game off and I didn't.

Because I'm so crazy and I think we're spending already an arm and a leg. Netflix is basically taking out a mortgage on their entire house. We could just get Hideo could you direct it. Oh God. Why not? No, no, no, no, no, no. Why not? Okay, because I'll tell you why.

He will make that over budget. He will make that $500 million. Why not? There's going to be a lot of, like, feet stuff that's going to like kind of creep us out. Perfect for Valerin. I think that's great. It will be meandering. Maybe like 20% of the people will actually understand it. Wait, Kajima, he, Tarantino like that?

You're a freak? Yeah, I, you really need to, like, look a little bit closer at Hideo Kajima's games. Go watch Death Stranding. Nah, man. But it's okay. I know, I look at any, like, blooper reel from Metal Gear Solid games, and you'd be like, oh, this guy, like. I'm not that. But Hideo, Kajima is always cooking with his stuff.

And watch his reviews on any movie, on every movie and television show. I love the Kajima scale on reviews. because if it's like a big paragraph, like, man, I went to go see across the Spadaverse and it was like dancing, it was great. And I saw this and you're like, oh man, this movie spin.

Then I don't have a 10. No, no, no, I'd be like, this was fantastic. I had a great time. They'd be like, South Captain America Brave New World the other day. It's like, oh, no, it's trash. Oh, no. I was there.

It's cooked. See, here's the thing, like, if you didn't know that this guy made video games, like, pivotal and, like, amazing video games. If you didn't know that about him, you'd have thought that he is Japan's most

prominent influencer. Yeah, like, Crotty Gray. He gets sent merch, he gets sent to every premiere, he has every famous person scanned at his house. Well, it's, well, he'd be like, man, I wish I could meet so-and-so famous person. And then by the next week, they're posted up on IG together. And it's like, bro. Why are you just chilling with Ella Pernell for no reason? He posted, when he posted after watching Moon Night, he was like, I like that Oscar Isaac. He's really nice guy. And then I did see a photo.

I might scan him later. I love it. All right. So we'll be casting in this show. If it's a billion, well, that's the thing. A billion dollars. To make.

Not the, I'm not going to get back. I was saying that's how much it's going to cost to make. Because Valorant has like 16 players, I did not choose. And they're all different. Like, there's the German tech, the Moroccan spy.

Like the Phoenix is a British, like, pyrotechnic. And so. So there's so many different nationalities. And I just think we should just hire voice actors for this. I don't think it needs to be anyone crazy. I don't think we need to go to Ella Pernell and be like, can you do that? Well, she didn't do jinx. But I'm like, I don't think we need her to come play the black male Phoenix, who's a pyrotechnic.

I just think we should just give voice actors that are really convincing and good in these roles. Okay. I do love that. That also follows their nationalities because it would be fun to get like an Australian plant person. You mean you don't want Ella Pernell playing somebody that doesn't look exactly? A black male? Right? A black man?

Hey, it's 2025. He walks up and just like, hey. It's the unwokening. It's the unwokening, yeah. I mean, she can do whatever she wants. Doesn't mean I'll like it. Sure. Doesn't mean I don't like it.

All right. So very action heavy, a lot of gun play. I like it. Yeah. Is it going to ever be made for what I want? Absolutely not. It's $3 billion. I mean, I wouldn't put it past Netflix.

They will spend money on... They would have to literally cut a third. They would have to take a chunk out to do this. They would have to start right now for it to come out in 2045. Yeah. Takes a minute. Well, it was also arcane's doing. They even said that behind the scenes.

They were like, yeah, we were writing a lot and it took a long time. Things you got a sacrifice for art. This episode is brought to you by WeatherTech. Everyone knows winter is the MVP and making a mess. You don't need WeatherTech floor liners in the summer unless you hit the beach or go camping. Then you'd want a cargo liner or a road trip go side. ways, ketchup goes rogue, ice cream drips. Yeah, you'd be pretty happy about those weather tech seat protectors.

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My turn. All right, I'm going to follow in Jess's footsteps. I'm going to start with the serious one. Guys play Titanfall 2? Yes! The story mode of Titanfall 2 is some of the most electric... A man after my own heart. Electric gameplay that I've ever experienced.

Quick pause. Quick pause. Anybody that doesn't know about Titanfall or Titanfall 2, it's pretty much the biggest crime in the world that EA doesn't make any more of those games. Dude. The single player, I don't want to say change my life because that would be a little bit hyperbolic. Multiplayer just as good.

Multiplayer is fine. Had a great time. But the single player, I don't think up to that point that have ever been locked in on a game that I had playing the Titanfall 2 single player. Right. Like it was, brother, I was Jack Cooper. Right. Dog.

BT was my home boy. Yes. Again, spoilers for Titanfall 2. When BT sacrificed himself at the end of the story mode, brother, tears were falling from my eyes. To help you out here, just a brief synopsis about the world of Titanfall 2. Imagine mega galactic private military corporations. Yeah. fighting for global power and resources throughout the galaxy.

And basically they have these super soldiers called pilots that, like, pilot these gigantic mecks. And they revere pilots like their Jedi, basically. They're, like, amazing super soldiers. And the mecks that they use are, like, basically death machines. So, BT is, like, the automated AI, like, Titan that you kind of befriend. Yeah. and have this like amazing adventure with while encountering all of these other

rogue pilots. It's a wonderful, great story. I think this is a perfect idea for just a great science fiction action film. Right. And so when I'm thinking about this movie, I'm thinking about how do I get the best out of Jack and BT? That relationship is super meaningful. And so when I'm thinking about that, my only choice for director, director of Bumblebee.

Travis Knight. I'm going to kill you. Wow, all right. Okay, okay. Think about it. Well, okay, first of all, don't disrespect bumblebee. Where's the disres...

No, no, no, no, no. No disrespect to bumblebee. The relationship between bumblebee. Why? The relationship between Bumblebee and Charlie in that movie is essential. Travis Knight currently directing He Man Masters of the Universe.

See? You know what I'm saying? IP God. You know what I mean? I mean, you're not wrong. That relationship in that movie between Charlie and Bumblebee means something. And so I want to get the same level of

emotion and affection Oh my gosh, shout out he directed Kubo in the two strings I forgot about that. Yeah, it was funny, huh? It was funny second ago, wasn't it? Tagline. The tagline of the movie.

Yes. No one can hear when a Titan falls. If a Titan falls in the woods, is that kind of that shit like that? Joey, I think it was perfect. Yeah. Again, the story, Jack. Jack Cooper and BT have to fight their way through Typhon to complete Captain Ty Latamosa's mission and defeat the IMC.

They got to defeat the Apex Predators, Kane, Ash, Blix, all these like cool-looking. Yeah, those are basically the boss fights in the game. Yeah, and they're these like cool-looking pilots that are basically, like, they have their own special. One's got a sword. One can is like a lot of bombs and stuff like that. Really, really cool stuff. Really, really fun. And so my cast.

Sure. Right. You want somebody with some charisma. You want somebody very handsome. Oh, no. Go and Glenn Powell is Jack Cooper. Okay. Hell yeah.

Oh, wow. Hell yeah. I'm here for him. You know what I'm saying? Just every man handsome. You know what I mean? I mean, we saw Top Gun Maverick. You know, he can,

has the physicality to be in the suit and do the things that you need him to do. Is he to every man? Nah, unique because the thing about Jack Cooper is you ought to be. Kind of like Master Chief. You want to be able to see yourself, Master Chief. That's why he never takes off the mask. That's why he talks to the way he talks. This is, I think, where we get into the problem of video game adaptations where, like, characters aren't fleshed out enough.

No, I'm a bit of because they're kind of blind. And that works for video games because it's like, okay, well, like, we don't need the protagonist to talk because he's you. Yes. And you're just there. But it's Glenn Powell. He's got the natural charisma. And he's going to be talking mostly to BT. 7-274

who was going to be voiced Remember all caps when you spell his name? All caps when he spell his name It's going to be voiced by none other Than Tom Hanks I don't know about this Tom Hanks Doing like a straight

Like a straight man voice Right But he's I don't need I can't have a death robot Sound like Woody man Nah you don't sound like First of all

Woody is not how Tom Hanks talks He's a little inflection There's a lot of inflection Right there's a lot like he's very I'm gonna... Yeah, what is Tom Hanks' voice? Right, like the wind, bull's eye. But it's like BT, the thing about BT is, right?

He's supposed to sound like, he's super serious, yet somehow gets like affection. And he'll get like a joke off here or there, right? That makes you go like, hey man, like, I'm kind of, we kind of, I thought you was just a robot, but we kind of bonding right now. You know what I'm saying? He's got like, what, the three rules? You know what I mean?

And he does that, like, whole thing protects the pilot. Attack. Exactly, right? Of, uh, accomplished mission on all costs, whatever. I think Tom Hanks doing like, again, very much like a little, like, straight line. Kind of just like, like, it's kind of, like, it is, it will be like a little robotic. But being able to inflect that emotion when it's time to do it, sure. You need a super, super great actor to do that.

Okay. And if we, if we got the bread, come on as well. I mean, sure. I think getting Tom Hanks in the booth is going to cost you a lot less. So that's fair. I just, a quick pushback, I feel like we just need one person that's like a spicy personality to like make this a duo that's actually where. Because right now I think like America's dad and then America's hot neighbor. And that's kind of, yeah, I need something spicy.

Do you have anybody like that in the cast? A spicy person in the cast. Well, for Blix, Blix was like the main, the last person you fight. in the game. You're made antagonists. And I was going through it, right? And I was like, who do I want? Like, who can play the nasty villain, right?

Who can be the guy who in this movie, you're like, I want this guy to die. He has to die because he's been on my, he's been a reneeding for this guy to get it. No, because he's been going crazy. Michael Mando. Michael Mando One moment He was I mean

He was Scorpion In the Scorpion In Spider-Man Oh my guy And Better Call Saul Yeah yeah yeah He was Voss in Far Cry Mm-hmm

Mm-hmm Mm-hmm Like that's the part Like just like a slimy sub bitch You know Man shout out to him though He's great He's really he's really good

And so like If that's like as an op he'd be my number one op, so, or he would be the number one up in the game. So that's where I'm going with Blix as my enemy. Slight pushback, I want these rules reversed. I want Michael, I want Michael,

I want Michael Mando as our main guy. I want Glenn Powell. No. As our shit-talking white man evil. Nah, man, that's not how that goes, man. With Tom Hanks in the, in the booth? Nah, man, that's not how it goes. Okay, okay.

You got it, you know what I'm saying? He's so, because, again, this is the inwokinings, right? We can't have no color people, be good people. Okay. Okay. It's 2025. All right. Herman, did you click that?

Yeah, wait. It's 20, 25. Chat? If it's not white, it's not right. Okay. Okay. Oh, wow. Wow.

Joe Me, I don't like this. I don't like it. I'm not here for it anymore. I'm against this movie. This is a, this is a... Jomey, what's in that water? Is it correct? It's the bravest I've seen you be in a while.

I don't actually mean that. No, but I mean, like, it's the thing, the thing with Jack Cooper is that it's, again, I wanted to project a little bit of not simplicity, that's not the right word, but just very much every man, very, so I don't need it to be any more complex than that, right? Compos the handsome dude with the charisma to talk to the robot,

to make the robot fall in love with him and sacrifice himself to save, to, or that makes Tom Hanks sacrifice himself at the end of the game. Right. And Michael Mando has the energy. as the gravitas, just has the weight of an evil supervillain. And I think people are going to, like, really, like,

when he gets blown up at the ending, I'm like, hell yeah, woo, baby, type stuff. So that's why I made the choice. Also, we got Tamara Morrison as Captain Latisma, like, oh, oh. We got Tamara Morrison as Captain as Captain Ty. He's the one who, like, introduces BT and Jack, and then he dies.

and then they have, they pretty much like avenge him the whole movie. I feel like it's pretty important that he's mentioned in this picture. You kill my father! Yeah.

Basically, it's kind of like, well, I mean, he's the guy who's captain BC first and then he dies and then he's just like, Jack, you got to go save the world.

Go crazy, my man. Fair enough. So, yeah. I like it. Titanfall 2. Like, one of my, one of my all-time underrated fans. I don't know if it's still on the store

in on the Xbox, but if it is... You could absolutely play it on PlayStation, and you could definitely play it on PC. I bought it for like $5, too. It's the best $5 you will spend. Dude, it was awesome. Made by the people that made like,

OG Call of Duty 2. Well, so the problem is we're never getting Typhal 3 because those same people started making Apex Legends and that was the end of that. And that's done. That was the end of that. Yeah, it's tough. Rest in peace.

What can you do? Did people all paypex? I mean, they did for a minute, like they do all things. Yeah, enough. I think there's people still playing it. Definitely. I'm not watching it. I'm not watching it.

I'm just saying. People play Apex for like two weeks for real. Like, remember it was Overwatch, then it was a player. But people, like, stuck to those, or stuck to Overwatch, I think. Yeah, but it's that, it's that. But yeah, you pass. Marble rivals now. There will be a time when we stop playing Marvel rivals.

We're going to stop soon because these kids are all really good. And I'm not, I'm not playing this game anymore if I keep losing. Yeah. Are you playing comp? No, absolutely not anymore. You know how bad I've gotten? I've gotten to doing competitive, not competitive. It's just practice versus AI.

I'm on a team with normal people playing. against robots. Wow. Because I'm so sick of losing every single game because a Spider-Man comes in and beats my ass. I'm not doing this anymore. I'm losing my mind. I should just turn off the game.

I should uninstall it. Honestly, I should uninstall it because I have a happier life and I live longer. There's that great meme where it's just like you come, it's from Rogue One when Homeboy comes up to Mads Mikkelson and it's just like, a man of your talents missing. And then it's just like, it's all of the multiplayer online games over here. And then he comes like playing single. single player games and it's just like Red Dead and Uncharted.

He's like, it's a peaceful life. That's what I need. It's your turn, Steve-o. It's my turn. I'm going to go with another serious one again because this one's too fun. I loved one of these indie games and I think this could be so, so, so, so, so fun. Who has heard of Return of the Oprah Din? You just made that up.

It is not. The Return of the Oprah Dead? Of the Oprah Den. No. Is she a bear? She got Gail King in there? Yeah, who's in there, Gil King? Stedman's locking it down.

Stedman watching the cave hole? What was going on then? No. The Obra Dinn, D-I-N, not Oprah D-N. I can already feel Kerman the Booth disappointed in me. Now I am, now I'm disappointed in myself because I could have made something special. And I didn't.

I've settled for less. And I won't let you down like that again. No, return of the Obra Dinn is a wonderful, like, people like derogatorily call this like a walking simulator. But it's been. basically a like narrative driven investigation game where you play as stay with me now you play as a insurance claims investigator in the 1860s investigating the disappearance of a ship like a of a trade ship it just like pulls into port like it like it goes missing for months

and then it pulls into port with nobody on it And, like, the long since mystery has to be solved where you're given this, like, basically, like, ghost, like, watch or ghost compass. And you, like, find little bits of clues on the ship and find out that there was, like, a mutiny. There was a mass murder. There was this, like, giant, like, Cthulian monster that attacked the ship. Like, massive amounts of, like, intrigue.

And just basically figuring out what happened to the ship. So we can, so that we can. charge them in insurance. You want us to play State Farm Simulator. Basically. I don't know why they made him an insurance adjuster. I don't know why they made him that. They could have just made him a detective,

but instead it's like, I guess it is you have the right to be there and like you get access to the ship's logs and stuff. But you got to do the jingle. Yeah, yeah, you got to do like a... Like a good neighbor. Oprah Din. Oprah Din is there. Yeah.

Oh my goodness. Shout to them. But no, basically, I love a cool mystery where you're just basically piecing together a story out of order. And this was reflected in gameplay where you find either a body on the ship or a item of clothing or something.

And then like you get this vision and it's all in like still frame where you kind of like walk around this scene that's only a brief moment of like you see somebody attempting to shoot the captain and you got to like walk around and identify people's faces and where they were

and what time frame things were. So I like the idea of a mystery being like kind of like piled to compiled together wholesale by a detective and an investigator, basically drawing together names. Do they fall in love? No, nobody falls in love. There's a love story on the boat. I don't want to spoil that. But many, many people on the ship, lots of people to cast, lots of people to kind of like find scenes that are to be observed while also not. directly interacted with, but sort of like, again, retroactively pieced together to make a compelling story.

Yeah. So I have, there's a lot of like, like themes of greed and unsettling scary visuals and monsters and dread and stuff like that. So I'm going to start with the director. Okay. Just to give you the vibe so then I can bring it, bring it out. I want Mike Flanagan. Okay. Director of Dr. We love him.

Dr. Sleet. Yeah. Midnight Mass. Oh, there's Netflix. stuff. Netflix horror stuff, amazing. Yeah.

He's great for this. I wanted a cast. This isn't exactly like the, like, this is more like East India trading company. Levels of crew, so you can get to have a lot more of a diverse cast. And I'm not exactly trying to look for like, I don't know,

European, like, centrism when it comes to, like a cast when it comes to this. I want my main investigator, Marcus Abbott to be played by Dev Patel. Okay. Every man?

You say no. I said, oh. Oh, you said, oh. Love him. Okay. Is that your... Yeah. Oh, that man is...

No, Dev Patel, love him. Yeah. I think he's a great... First of all, would love to see him play a detective. I think he's great for somebody who's like discovering something who's in over his head,

but also is determined to uncover the truth. Yeah. has a bit of a like can like start off as a bit of like a bit of a working stiff and then loosen up into like can be unhinged can be compelling love that stuff and then we have like different elements

of the crew to be kind of like varying different ages and races which I think is a very good like good interesting dynamic for the captain I want Stellan Scarsguard got to get them Scars guards employed listen I'm writing checks

for those Scarsguards Okay. Give it to them. Mine as well. Mine as well. Ben Witchoff as the first mate. I want Tilda Swinton as the surgeon that is on the ship. I want Stephen Yun as the foremsman.

Big Steve. There might be some like spooky mermaids. Are you sure? I mean, I'm sure. You don't have to be. I want Zendaya as spooky mermaid. Got a cat Zendaya. Got a cast, Zendaya.

Spooky Mermaid. Yeah. And then there's like there's like Bosen's so it would be like Dave Batista, a lot of like muscle bound guys, stuff like that.

This is like perfect Halloween time spooky vibes, rain-drenched ghost ships. I love it. Any yays? Any nays?

Any questions? Concerns? I'm here for you. But also you have me at Mike Flanagan. I will watch every single thing Mike Flanagan touches no matter what he is. Who is Dev Patel

interacting with? thought the entire time. Hedevital, he's not really, like, here's the thing, he's more so reacting to most things. Yes. Because the, like, the investigation on the ship is going to be, like, presented to him as, like, ghostly visions. Right. And he'll have to either interact with his direct boss.

And this is going to be a fabrication of the film because in the game, you're just walking around the ship by yourself. Yes. So you can't have him do nothing and just walk around reacting to things. So it probably have to be, like, his boss who may or may not know certain things about the ship. What if... His wife?

What if you make up, like... Because he's the assurance guy. What if you make up like a bad detective? You know, just like a like... Like a Harvey Bullock that's kind of like always drunk or like not really knowing what he's doing. Yeah, just got somebody who's like not really interested in like the seriousness of the thing. Okay.

So I'm with you here. The police are getting in his way because it's like you're out of your jurisdiction. Not really out of a police business. Mostly just like... Maybe not a drunk, but somebody's just like, yo, it's a friggin' ship who cares. Right. Right. Like we do the paperwork, man.

We fill it in, brother. We go home, brother, nine to five. That's all I do. You're doing too much, brother. For an insurance adjuster, this is way too deep, man. You're seeing ghostly visions doing this thing. That's how it starts. Then it starts to get a little interesting.

Uh-huh. Right? You start to get sucked into the story. Like, okay, the doctor was here. But wait, that doesn't make sense because... Because the log of Marsson is there. And then the detector's kind of like, okay, no, wait. I'm actually, I can detect stuff.

look at that little wood over there And then it's kind of like Oh and then kind of like figure it out Not like together Devadale's doing all the imagine stuff But it's kind of like he's not completely helpless You don't want just like dead away The entire time

You gotta like carry your own At some point But then they kind of like Figure it out together Exactly You know okay All right well I'm gonna keep it moving Because I know that we don't have much time

Oh we don't Okay I'll go a little bit quickly But it's gonna be kind of hard Because my kid this game It's gonna blow your mind It's gonna blow your mind I chose Super Smash Bros. Ultimate because we all know Super

Grasper's Ultimate. And what we want is a movie, right? Do we? Shut the hell up. First of all, yes. No, no, it's absolute box off. But it depends on who's doing that movie. And I hate to say it, imagine it's universal.

Because that's the pitch that I have from this movie. Because you're going to hear the cast and be like, Jessica, why would you have that many non-Japanese people in this movie? And that's a universal thing to do. Sure. Okay, so either right, it's a distant future, right? future. What we do it, it's imagine if you will, Ready Player 1. We are living in a

society where we're just living virtual reality. We're building stuff. We're tinkering with technology that is left behind. And there's a group of people that have been creating games for everybody to enjoy on the planet. And they love these games, but at night, they use these like virtual reality costumes, kind of virtual reality costumes. They basically make act. It's like, imagine an Iron Man suit that can be built

out of nanobytes immediately. Okay. Covering your body. And those developers will play as their characters in an underground fight rings. And when they play as those characters, they're testing new skills, seeing how they fight so they can add it to the games. And then one day they all get letters in their inbox that are like, you should come to this mystical island

where you're going to fight to the death. And the tagline for this is the secret contest where the world's greatest warriors fight in a battle to the death. So you're basically making Mortal Kombat with Super Smash. I like that you said that because I stole that tagline from Bloodsport. Which is directly right. That's funny. The characters that I've chosen are characters like,

Sora, Link, Zelda, Samis, Kirby, Fox, Pikachu, Luigi, Ness. I will keep in mind they probably don't want... Universe is like, you cannot touch Peach or Mario, but I'll let you take a lot of the... I don't know. This IP is a pretty... Okay, no, no, no, no, no. It's taking all these characters. And mind you, when they are put into their suits

and they are fighting, it is voice actors. It is not like we are not using the actual actors. But we are using actual actors to be like, okay, so Chris Platte puts on a suit. Yeah, basically. And these people created, in this fictional universe, these people created these characters, their backstories, and their games. Right. So for instance, let me choose a random person. Zelda.

If Zelda's in the game, I want the person that created Zelda, her backstory in the game is cutting on the suit as Anya Taylor Joy. The voice actor person would be someone else completely different when she's fully as Zelda. So Kirby was created by Jason Mamoa. Fox is created by Idris Elba. Pikachu was created by Stanley Tucci. Luigi, I kept Charlie Day because why not? Ness, I want to be made by Ken Wannabi.

Okay, wow. This is a big zag. This is a big zag for what I thought. This is universal, dropping money. Captain Falcon was created by Amanda Sternberg. Dr. Mario is created by Yaya Abdulmanteen. Marth is created by the character from One Piece that plays Zorro.

Ganendorff is Dave Batista. Yanenorff is, okay. Snake is made for William Shander. Stop. Okay, you're not being serious. William Shatter is 95 years old. I told you this is not serious. Also, this universe is they're creating the characters

when they put on their shoes. They can do anything. And Snake is an old game. Of course, an old man that wants to create a stealthy man that can hide under boxes. It would be William Shander. Cloud is created by Zendaya. I see the vision, right?

I feel like you didn't have to do all that. No. You could have just been like, all right, we got Detective Pikachu from the Detective Pikachu movie. We got the Mario, we got Sonic, we got the Zelda movie coming. And then you repopulate that with like, again, Kirby, Snake, like all the other characters. You Steve from Minecraft, right? Sure. And then you just, for whatever reason, there's a.

a hand, disembodied hand that wants them all to fight each other. That's what I wanted to do with the child, but you're also saying exactly what doomsday is going to be to Secret Wars. Kind of, yeah. And I'm not doing that. Universal wants to create their own. Is the hand played by Robert Tony Jr.?

No, the hand was going to be a child, but you know what that is the Nizago movie. Because that's how the Nizago movie ends is with Will Ferrell being like... You mean... You mean the Lego movie? Yeah, the Lego movie where they literally... Wait, we can't use the word...

That's what the title was. No, no, I think the world could use more movies like Nijago. No, but the end of the movie is... the whole time they're like that Will Ferrell the dad can't play with the boy, his son and the son's been playing

with these like a Lego movie but that's what that's what I'm saying I'm not making that I'm not using the hand of the child and I'm not using a multiverse well I just say the hand of the child it could just be like an actual hand yeah just like

I thought about that and I was like that's Star Trek the hand in the sky and I was like I'm not doing that episode of Star Trek I was like I'm just gonna make a literal blood sport I don't know you seem to be doing

everything else in this movie you made as well I was like no I'm making blood sport because that's all I want And that is what Super Smash Bros is. I mean, it's basically Bloodsport. And that's all we do in Smash.

No one's playing the story. We're playing against each other's characters. In college, that's all you do in college is you go to these kind of tournaments. And I'm like, oh, this is a Bloodsport tournament. Just react. Real? Also, again, I made this. I thought we were doing jokes the second round.

I thought we were doing silly pitches. I didn't know we were going to do serious things all the time. You know what? I took this too serious, and Jess, you honored the spirit of the exercise. Yes, thank you. And Haley Joel Osman's also in this. Oh, yes. As what?

Oh, he's doing the voice of Sora. Because he's the original. Of course, of course. We have to keep most of the original voice actors in there if we can. But then when I want, like, Jason Manzuka's as bayoneta, that's going to be fun. That actually, actually, no, perfect. Gold Star. Jason Manzook was great.

He was like, I love this character. I'm not going to fight it. Here's the thing. I either have the most notes or I have no notes. So I have no notes. for you, Jess. Hey, you just put a bunch of celebrities. That's how Universal plays it.

Put a bunch of celebrities on that poster title and they're going to be fun. That's what the post-credited of Minecraft is. Reseracting the Dark Universe. Jack Black is going to his little dirt house. And then he opens his door. He goes to his door. There's a note on the door and it's a smash logo. And it's a-you've been invited to a-turn-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it.

It's just a smash logo and it cuts to black. And then Sonic 4 is the same, the same ending. Everybody's just getting invitations. Everybody's just getting invitations. limitations to the tournament. It's going to be crazy. It's going to be crazy. We'll be, brother,

$2 billion. If a Smash Brothers tournament invite happens at the end of one of those movies. $2 billion. I will scream. It's coming. It's coming. They can't help themselves.

They can't help themselves, man. Money. There's money there to be made. All right, Jomi, take us home. So I fall in in justice footsteps. And my movie, and guys, I just want to

be serious right now. Yes. Oh, this is a serious, serious movie. Directed by Bong Juno. Oh, no. Yeah. Starring Bill Hader.

Daniel Day Lewis. Oh, whoa. Anna Sawai. Tom Holland and Timothy Shalami. Movies called Jetpack Joyride. Oh, hell yeah. I'm here.

I'm in it. I'm in it. Jetpack Joyride. I'm in it. For those of you are familiar, Jetpack Joyride was a is a mobile game. I found out you can still download and play today

where you play as Barry Steak Fries. Shut that left. That's his name. Shut that hell up. His name is Barry Steak Fries. His name is Barry Steak Fries. He's a struggling salesman

working for a gramophone making company. One day he comes across legitimate research, a secret laboratory with evil inventions and finds out about their newest invention, the machine gun jetpack. Seeing it as a way to start a new life, Barry breaks it to the laboratory and liberates the jetpack by firing it through the endless laboratory.

Right. Obviously, Barry is played by the guy who played Barry in that one show that we all like. Called Barry. No. Bill Hayden. You just want a Barry playing a Barry? Well, so here's the thing. When I thought about it, I didn't realize that he already played a Barry.

I don't think about it. But there is a little darkness and edge to it. right of Bill Hader that we were familiar with. Dog, I'm looking at this and this is just, this is like Flappy Bird. You didn't play Jetpack Joyride? I used to play. I played the hell out of Jetpack Joyride.

So the reason I chose Bancho Ho is because of snowpiercer. Oh my God. And he goes, you go train car to train car. So you want dystopian like bleak mega corporation. Exactly. And he has to go like level by level. Sure. Right?

With the Jetpack. So the jet pack is like basically being flown around like imagine the ending of Indiana of Jones where it's like it's being handled by top men. Yes. A bunch of crates. Yes. And laboratories and stuff. Bill Hader obviously is Barry steak fries.

Stop saying the full name. That name is so funny. Annasewi as his wife. Shut up. Roxanna steak fries. Daniel Day Lewis as the head of legitimate research. Okay. He's the guy who's like, yo, we got to get Barry out of here.

He's ruining all our inventions. He's going to cause us a problem. We have to kill him, right? And then we have Tom Holland and Timothy Salome as Scientist One and Scientist Two respectfully. Okay, wow, so it's a shortcast. They don't, well, yeah, I mean, it's an intimate film. The game has one character, a jetpack, and a bunch of, like, robots.

And that's why you have to build the world around it, you know what I'm saying? Barry is going through a tough time, right? He just lost his job at the Gramophone Factory, right? Stop it. He wants to propose to his girl, Anna Suwai, but he can't afford to give her the life he feels she deserves. So what does he do? I'm going to steal this jet pack

and I'm going to go make some set on the black market make some bread, but he's not thinking it through. This is an evil corporation. He gets it. Why am I thinking of like Safty Brothers' good time, like uncut gems level, like heist gone wrong? You see it.

You see it. It's just like tension after tension, moment after moment. Tom and Timmy, they're supposed to be ops. They're like, yo, this guy could use our help. Tom is like actually no bro we're supposed to kill this guy because he's still in our research

Timmy's like you know what I'm hearing his story I kind of mess with him bro and they got like it's so it's levels of levels of emotion the tagline okay

is it a joy ride when you're fighting for your life come on three billion dollars three billion dollars I think it's a great idea it being named after that app that went away so quickly

it's got a ridiculous. And might as well being salty because my last pitch was a hat on a hat. Yeah. Yeah, a little bit. This is a habadasher on a habitasher. I'm just saying, is yours ridiculous? 100%.

Is my ridiculous? All I'm saying. Frankly, I look like the stupid one for doing two serious ones. Yeah, I thought we were being silly. But I think it's a great story. It's just so funny that it always has to come back to that one little app on an iPod

at the end of the day. At the end of the day, man. Look, IP could come from anywhere. You know, some of the ones, like, we'll go into some of the honorable mentions I was thinking about, man. I was thinking about bejewels. Oh, I love bejewel. I was like a ridge race runner or something?

What was the one where you're, like, in the tombs and you're running as the temple run. Temple run. Temple run. You know what I mean? I mean, that was basically Tom Holland's uncharted. Yeah, exactly. That was more of that game than it was uncharted. I don't know how you'd make a story out of it.

doodle jump, but you got to make it going out of you know what I mean? You just made a movie with a man called Barry Steak Fries, so... I can't believe his name is Barry Stakebris. Pinball 3D was what I was saying about. Oh my God. I used to do the actual pool table 3D ones. Once I actually put like some actual time and effort in, Team Fortress

2. Counterstrike Go. Plants for zombies? Portal 2. Because I like Wheatley. I just love the Wheatley thing. And one like I had I had pitch, like I had all my notes, but I just realized like it's probably be two niche

dokey dokey literature club oh very good a 12 episode anime and I can't spoil it there's no we don't have the time we don't talk about it go home get on your steam it's free it's go play that

play that for free enjoy cinema you know you know I was only thinking overcooked and geck's the gecko I thought overcooked too but my first time like we watch the bear every year yeah we watch the bear every year and that game turns people into the bear

I haven't played Overcooked just by the views of everyone I was watching it I'm like I'm not fighting It's real stress Because I'll be like Why do you overcook that I would be looking at the people

I need you watch it on All you have to do is You're supposed to put your soaps You have one job I would get too mad at the people I play It would literally be Karmie and cousin Just but like in real life

Cousin It's not what you want It's not what you want Amazing Yeah I had a lot of thoughts But listen Studios if you're hearing us right now Hey.

You know what I'm saying? You know more, you can find me on Twitter. You know what I mean? Slime to my DMs, let's make something happen. Executive producer, that's all I ask. I need 20% up front. I need some back end. But we can make it happen.

Just hate my line. Very steak fries. Yeah, very stick fry, baby. All right, guys. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you so much for hanging out with us. This has been here comes the pitch. This has been Mint Edition.

Before we go, let's remember, on the ring or verse feed. Tomorrow, button mash is going to be back with their Minecraft reactions, and as well as Jess, To talk about what? South of Midnight. That's right. Very, very fun. And on Wednesday, Midnight Boys are going to be back with their Daredevil reactions.

Thursday with House of Our Daredevil reactions. Jess, thank you so much for coming with us. Anything to promote or declare? Go, well, it's not going to come out until next week, but go anticipate me, Ben and Van, talking about South of Midnight. I am very excited. I've already started playing that game, and I have only good things to say. All right.

Wonderful. Jomey, what about you? Minecraft, baby. Minecraft. $3 billion at the box office, baby. Also be sure to check out his Mission Impossible project. On socials.

Thank you so much to Kerm, our wonderful intrepid producer, an additional production from Arjuna, Ramgapal. Jomey, parting words. Ken, gotta give love to our producer, Mr. Number 1 over there. Come on, hit us.

Steve Kerman. Steve, that's not, all right. We'll see you. Guys next time.