The Rising’s Growing Together Podcast - Balancing Ambition, Career & Mum Life | Honest Talk on Growth & Fulfilment | @TheRising1111 Ep.11

Episode Date: May 12, 2025

How do you balance big dreams, motherhood, and a career? In this episode of Growing Together, Billie and Charlotte get real about what it truly takes to grow professionally and personally while juggling all the roles life throws at you. They dive into: • Navigating career transitions • Building strong team dynamics • Creating a growth-driven company culture • Aging with confidence and energy • Finding fulfilment and support in every season of lifeWhether you’re chasing big goals, pivoting in your career, or searching for more balance, this honest convo will leave you inspired and grounded. Final thoughts and appreciation New episodes every Friday Subscribe for more real talk on motherhood, career, and personal growth. Hosted by Billie & Charlotte best friends, ambitious mums, and career women sharing what it’s really like behind the scenes. Connect with us: www.linktr.ee/therising1111

welcome back hey welcome back everyone thanks for joining us for another episode yes we're still here yeah we're still going strong and i actually had someone tell me that they've been watching this week you know i said the other week that no one's told me that they've been watching it but no i've had a couple people tell me good it is it is and i'm surprised that actually that how many people have said it to me that's what I mean I kind of forget about it we do we do these we have a chat and then I carry on with the week that's exactly what I said to the person who said to me I was like I forget it even goes live because we just click play yeah we have a chat Liam does all the editing and the posting and then I forget it even goes out into the

atmosphere I should be in my mind that oh yeah I do do that thank you I enjoy it too no it's nice when they say like they find it interesting yeah it is it's good I do too yeah have you had a nice week Yeah, so I've been quite busy with work this week. We've had an opening of a new office. So companies grow. We've opened a new office in Casada near the petrol station. So, yeah, we've had lots of people over from our London office, like the CEO, the CFO, the head of marketing, all really important people come over.

And obviously, loads of the local guys, everyone that kind of worked in the Costa Blanca kind of all came. down to the office opening as well and then we invited partners so for obviously my company as a as a currency company our partners are generally estate agents and lawyers and we collaborate together because we all kind of work with the same client so we help their clients move money for kind of buying and selling property yeah so it was good so um we had uh like partners come we had like uh someone slicing like the sarano ham and like canopays and drinks and stuff and out big Events. Balloons, yeah.

It's a big event, important event. Yeah, well, like I say, it's a great company. We're growing and, yeah, it was nice to kind of celebrate with everyone. And it kind of just shows the hard work that we've been putting in. Yeah, especially when you all get together and you know, you're all talking and seeing it's coming to life in a way, you know. Yeah. So, you know, I've worked really hard, obviously since joining. I always work hard.

But specifically in these, like, last two years, we've had like a lot of focus on. on this area and I had a lot of responsibility to grow it. So the only reason we've opened an office is because we have been growing. We've been seeing the results of all the hard work and having people come over from London and, you know, they've heard about certain partners that we're now working with or they've heard about things that I've done and yeah, it's nice. It's rewarding. Yeah, rewarding and it feels good.

Yeah, yeah. Hard work does pay. Yeah, definitely. But you've been living too, so. Good balance, girl. Yeah, exactly, all with a Friday's off. So a lot of this work was obviously previous to having Hayden. But again, the kind of biggest jump and growth we had was I was doing it all while I was pregnant.

So, you know, that can be quite challenging in itself when, you know, you've worked, same as me, pretty much up until you're about to pop. Yeah. Because in the moment, you feel like that sometimes you're not going to get out of it or you're not going to get the results that you're, you know you want from yourself you expect from yourself yeah but you know when it does come to the end and you think I did it or we did it you know and especially for my work because we work in financial years so you know there's so much like investment and then there's like monthly targets and quarterly targets and yearly targets so there's like projection that you're hoping to get yeah exactly yeah so when you fall pregnant halfway through yeah and before going off it's like a

chase the end. How much can I get done? Yeah. But, you know, I kind of went off a couple months before the end of our financial year and I managed to, I think, deliver everything that we kind of wanted before going off that was kind of, we had a year to do. So, no, it was good. It was, it was nice to not go off feeling like, oh, there was still so much more I needed to do. You reached your personal targets before you. Yeah. So that felt good. Yeah. And now, and now coming back after it and, you know, get to this point. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, exactly. seeing that it continued, that momentum that we created before, you know, maternity leave. Because it is hard when you, like, have a career and you really care about it to come away from it.

But then also you want to enjoy that time with your baby as well. And, you know, family's important. So it's like, I think I've realised that I went up with Lexi. I went back to work when she was a couple of months, you know, I'd be in. in treatments and I'd be leaking because I'd need to be feeding her really, you know? Yeah, yeah. And looking back, I wish I didn't rush so much going back. Yeah.

But I think because I would just, I cared so much about about my work and about the team, you know. We are team players. It was difficult if I wasn't there and, you know, I just thought, well, I can go in, you know, I'm all right. But at the same time, you know, Alex is fine, I'm fine. But really, you know, that was the time that I should have made the most of being there. and doing it and it didn't, I mean, it didn't really benefit the, I mean, it helped to help the company, the clinic, obviously. But, yeah, looking back, I think I should have just focused more on that, you know.

It is hard because sometimes I care too much. Well, we do. But some people don't. So when you rely on a team that don't, or not all of them, some people in a team don't, that feels a bit, you know, like a kicking the teeth as well, you know, you think, why don't everybody feel like that about their workplace? Even if it's your own company or not, you know? Yeah, like you say, for for us,

I think you can stick us anywhere and we'll work equally as hard, equally as much. But yeah, not everyone does. And when you are in like a team or, you know, you're all working together, when you have them differences, that's really frustrating for people like us that really care. Yeah. It's very hard to understand how some people don't. But then at the same time, I think, you know, it's a little bit different for you now.

You're self-employed because the more you put it, the more you get out, you can kind of see that. Whereas when you work for a company, you can continually push and push and push and push yourself. And you don't necessarily always get rewarded for that because it's not really your decision. So I do feel like there needs to be that balance. And I kind of learned that from one from Kasen to Hayden because, yeah, the same with Kasem. And I think by the time I took the four months maternity leave and then a last bit of holiday, I was back within like four and a half, five months. But then I felt a little bit of pressure because from myself, like we just said,

like wanted to get back knowing that, you know, I left like people and targets and they needed me and, you know, I'm good at my job. But then also a little bit from them, you know, there was a little bit of like, you know, what are your plans? Because if you're not coming back soon, then we might have to change things. And then I was a bit of pressure without meaning maybe to, but it feels like your pressure. In the moment, I wasn't sure if they were doing it on purpose or not. Looking back, again, there's still a bit of a question mark.

But, yeah, that was quite quick. Whereas this time round, I had zero pressure. It was tell us what you want to do when you want to do it. I took a little bit longer. So I had the standard four months. Then I had like my holiday. And then I took a month unpaid or so. So I didn't go back till Hayden was about seven months.

So just those extra couple, that's still small. That extra couple of months really helped. But some people, some owners of companies or bosses I've had don't care about your mental health, physical health, home life. All they care about is that, well, you're working for me and this is that. I expect this and, you know, you make me money. Yeah, basically. They don't care about anything else. No.

It's a shame when you work for companies like that. And actually, I think that that completely counteracts the result that they want. They want you to work hard. They want you to make their money. But when you literally feel like a piece of a machine and you don't feel like you're cared for, you resent that. And I don't feel like you get the best out of people. Whereas when you make you not want to, it literally makes you, you know, it does make. It's a bit reluctant to like push yourself or stay a bit later or try harder.

And although I work, I'm self-employed, I do rely. on a lot of the team in the clinic for the benefit of my patients too because at the end of the day when they're walking through the clinic the first people they see is a receptionist so if that receptionist doesn't give them a warm welcome or you know that first feeling

you have a little bit reliant as well not against me but you know that it's kind of it's an impression of they're judging you and your whole service the whole everything on top of that you know so as much as I am I do also rely on everyone in that clinic to pull together as a team to have that level of a standard and, you know, a passion that we have for our job, whether it's, you know, wherever, whatever field you were in, you know.

Yeah. And you get a lot more out of people when you care about them as people. Yeah. And especially people like me and you where we've got it in us to, you know, push and work hard and deliver and all of that. Like you don't have to, like, micromanage me. You don't have to, you know, like run it like that. All you literally have to do is just be a nice person, be there as a support,

and then we'll deliver, we'll do what's necessary. But when you sometimes feel that you're the only person that's put in that effort, yeah, team, sometimes you can, sometimes you lose your own standards, I think. Yeah. You know, and think, well, I'm not, yeah, yeah, yeah, not when you would never do that usually. Well, it's like, I keep seeing a thing and it's like, oh, I got good at my job and it's ruined my life because now I've got to do my job and everybody else's job. And that's what happens when you're in the environment of you really care about what you do and you work hard and you are good at what you do.

Like if you call them like A players, for example, they don't need much, you know, pushing and anything like that because they naturally have it in them to drive and work hard, which we do. But if you put an A player in amongst a team that has like B and C players, they leave. because like you say they get brought down whereas like it works differently if you're a C player or a B player and you work with an A player sometimes that can help you come up but yeah it's and I think you've got to try

it comes from the top down and I think it depends on kind of the culture that's been created in the company well yeah even with for example me and before me and the team that we had in a previous clinic as a team we smashed it

We all know what we had to do, where we had to be, how we had to do it, and we smashed it. We was great as friends, as colleagues, professionally, everything, everything. But above us was quite restrictive. So then that sometimes changed the work dynamics because it felt us a bit like, oh, you know, we're doing it all and we don't really feel appreciated. We feel appreciated within each other. But actually, we're doing it for this person and this person doesn't really care. Yeah. And it then makes you feel, like you say, a bit resentful of doing that job as well as you usually would

because you just think, but at the same time, my patient care, you know, and obviously, yeah, so it's, that was a hard, hard thing to work with. But then in the end, you just, you've got to make that decision of do I continue doing this? Yeah. Or do I, do I go? Yeah. And I think, like you say, it can either be you love your team and it's like management, or owners that you're kind of fighting against or it can be like in and amongst the team

it's like dysfunctional and it's not working and it could just be one person yeah or obviously a few but either way I think you you have to address it from my experience you can't just let it go and go and go no and I think that's what causes the problem because like I say yours was more kind of the owner of the company and that kind of was more difficult but at least you had the people around you so yeah it was luckily we had our team like us together we had to

through it but it definitely affected us all hugely mentally you know because it especially when you enjoy your work

there's nothing worse than I love my job I'm good at my job and people are making it hard well I'm saying I'm caring too much I think it's

well I suppose you can't it's good to care I think if you get in that if you get in that appreciation and acknowledgement and support back you know I think that's otherwise it does

it gets draining and you just wears you down well that's the difference like i read it and it's absolutely true because i've witnessed it the good people leave their jobs because they're not appreciated they don't feel fulfilled they don't feel like they're involved in decision making they don't feel like they're financially rewarded for the work that they do um and like yeah the company dynamic like you have to be able to feel a little bit in control of what you do or at least collaborating with decisions and growth and like that you're moving as well yeah as well as financially rewarded appreciated supported all those things and if if someone doesn't feel like that then that's generally when companies lose good people which is why I think it is important to have

regular team meetings or um what's it like building team building team building thing yeah I do think that makes a huge difference yeah I'm in the middle of organising that at the moment for May I do really think, you know, because even things like Christmas parties, look how it changes. It makes you feel so much more together as a, I think, you know, as a team and you do these different things together rather than just walking in and walking out of work. And sometimes, like, you can get to know each other a bit, especially if you've worked in a place for a while. But again, it's, you know, you might not always be in the same office together.

You might not always sit next to each other. You're doing your job. You're doing your job. So it's like you get to know each other a little bit through conversations and things. but it's when you are taken out of that work environment for like a dinner or for an evening or for a team building exercise, that's when you can really sometimes get to know each other more and that creates a really good dynamic. And I think that the company I work for now is kind of head and shoulders above previous companies I've worked for

because they put so much emphasis on their people because they understand that the more we focus on the people and keeping the people happy, the better everyone is actually going to do. And, yeah, exactly that. So they're more that they're getting what the people working, the workers are getting what they want, the more they're giving out and the better the results that they're going. And the better, like you say, all the customers that come in contact with us or the partners that we collaborate with.

They're happy to be there. Yeah. They're happy to be doing their job. They love it. They're rewarding by doing what they do, but they're getting rewarded from the above them as well. Yeah. Yeah.

And I think that makes, I do. I do think that makes a huge difference. I get a lot of thought in my way, even I'm self-employed, but any ideas or. anything I've got to say or do. They're like, yep, great. Everyone's behind me as much as I am for them. Just because I'm self-in-blood,

doesn't mind I don't ask, do you need help with anything? Yeah. You know, and I do, I think that. Yeah, you're kind of sat in the middle, aren't you? So you've got self-employed, so you've got kind of that side of it, but then you're also part of a company, part of a team as well. Yeah. So you kind of have that both.

Yeah. And it is important that we're both, you know, care. There's nothing worse than being around people where you don't feel like they're rooting for, you. Yeah. Yeah. Like I've had colleagues in the past and it's like if something good happens, like if I've won, you know, a really good partner or we've like, you know, helped a client and we've, you know, closed a really good deal or something like that to kind of just get the feeling and you know deep down when someone's not rooting for you. I mean, it doesn't feel good, but I think over the years I've got to a point where I just feel sorry for you.

Yeah. I've had that where I've thought I was, I was being rooted for. And then you find that actually you're not. You're like, that's worse because it's like, it's all fake. Yeah. Oh, I was like, oh, okay. I thought, I thought it was okay. But fine. That's fine. Because if I'm your friend and your best, funny, if you're me, I'm your worst. So, watch out. Someone said that to me. One of my partners that I work with, she's quite a spiritual lady. And she reads Oras. And the first time I met her, she was like, like, you've got a really, like, bright aura and, you know, I can see it. It's really good.

But she was like, I wouldn't want to cross you. Yeah. And I was like, do I give that off? She was like, well, I can see it. I was like, oh, okay. How'd you had the glass of wine by then, miss? It's ambly. But no, she's lovely.

But, yeah, I think that it, yeah, just sitting around after we did the office opening, then we all went for a drink and then a lot of them carried on and went for dinner, but I come home. and I was just sat around looking around bearing in mind we had people from the CEO down to you know essentially lower in the hierarchy we had heads of all different departments

but then you know all different levels within the company everyone was interacting everyone was I just was looking around I was like I like everybody here yeah I love where I am I love it's part of this yeah and I'm three years deep now into this company

haven't come across one person that isn't just genuinely willing to help and that's all different whether they're in management whether they're not in management you know whatever their job role is they're literally trying and doing it

to the best of their ability and everyone is enjoying it and getting together and getting the results and I think it shows and like even with the birthday was it the birthday thing is your come was that

do you say your birthday give you your birthday off yeah we get our birthday off there's little things like that I'm showing you know you you know yeah or even i'm they've been quite good with you with your maternity haven't they really great you know it was we'll support you and whatever you want to do whenever you want to come back when you come back obviously i went back and changed my job role that was you know a conversation that we had my decision it's all kind of just worked out and i'm just you know

really really happy that i made the decision when i was in a company that i wasn't happy with to actually leave because you know i'm i'm i'm very loyal and I will you know push and work hard and you know I don't ever really like envision like leaving I know that statistically if you job hop every two to three years then you actually earn more money because you obviously get companies that a bid for you and you up your you're able to up your package every time you move along but that's just not really me I'm not really in it to jump I'd much rather like get deep in a company and just stay there and work there and actually it just goes to show because the majority, not the majority, because we're a big company and we're

growing and growing. So obviously we're, the team's getting bigger and bigger. But there's a lot of people in the company that have been there since day one. That says a lot. Like two guys have worked there for 23 years. The company's 25 years old. They've worked there for 23 years. Never left. And have no. No desire to leave. And then, you know, a couple of the other, like my boss is his first job out of university and he's been there he's like 16 17 years however long it is there's there's a lot of people that have been there for 15 16 17 years and for a company that started small and has grown and has had a lot of change that's really unusual that everyone's stuck but i think but it says a lot it says a lot because i think that just genuinely as they move through growth and

changes i mean that's really hard because it's hard enough to keep people happy in and environment when things are steady but to actually keep people happy when everything's up in the air and changing i think that's you know you know really great that they've been able to do that i've done it very well but they've got um you know and i've worked for other companies that are just as big just as established just as many years in the business but it's a completely different environment and i'm in set on yeah on their well i nearly didn't go back into currency when i when i I left and I went into property, I was really reluctant to get back into currency because of my experience. And I just thought every company's the same. Every corporate company would

treat you the same. It's going to be the same thing there. And then obviously I met with a few people. I spoke to them and I just had a completely different vibe. And I thought, well, I'll give it a go. The package that they were offering was, you know, really good. And then, yeah, it's just been nice that they didn't reel me in with, you know, fake things that they were like. false promises. Exactly. It's great. It's great. And then you get there and actually it's the same and everyone hates each other. It's like it's really genuinely not. And, you know, we've had a few people join us recently and they said the same thing. Like, you know, it's just so nice to be around people that care. And we've got like a whole people department specifically hired to make sure that the employees are happy and what can we do and things that we can implement. And yeah, it's just really, really nice and I'm just really happy with where I'm at. I think either as well as, um, Well, obviously, you just coming back, going back from maternity and that, even with the, the, being a mom, I think, working, you know, with, with different things you need to do. I mean, obviously maternity is maternity, but, you know, whatever else that might be, whether it's appointments or illnesses or da-da-da. And some people take the mix with that.

Yeah. And some people obviously don't. And sometimes I feel that, from my experience, sometimes I felt a little bit like people would get the aunt with me for it when, what am I supposed to do? I've got to go to this appointment. There's nothing worse. If you're feeling pulled because of a sick child, you know. Ultimately, I wouldn't just go, okay, I'm not going to work. I would try to manage that somewhere along the line that we would manage that I can work.

You know what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And whereas some people would go, oh, no, get it, I can't do it. Whereas I would always try not to, you know, and then sometimes getting that feeling, especially from your bosses that actually, well, actually you should be here. Well, I know I should be there. I know that. Yeah. I'm not doing it on purpose.

Yeah. But my priority at this time is this because that has to be. Again, I would always try to manage it in another way. Yeah. Whether it grandparents or obviously Mitch instead, because we are both self-employed. Yeah, yeah. But yeah, sometimes, no, I can't, I can't go in. And I have got better at that, I think.

Now, I'm in a different position, but I did get better at it. Sometimes I would literally put my work first. I think I've been guilty of that. Yeah. I've definitely multiple times, whenever the kids have been sick, it's like, well, I've got to go to work, glim, so you're going to have to deal with it. And I know they're okay. They're going to be okay with whoever I'm leaving, but sometimes, no, you're in my head now.

You know, I Not should have been Because it's a hard Yeah, but I think And I don't think every time But I think there's been times where You know like Oh, they're just a little bit ill

So like yeah, they're too ill to go to school But you know They're all right They just have to get through it It's better for the others Rather than them They stay at home in a way But then there's been times where

You know like they've had fevers And you know Favors can turn into seizures And like they're breathing a bit funny And they've got a rash And it's like Okay right This could go either way

They're either dealing with it And it's normal or actually this is not normal and this could turn very badly very quickly and even in them moments I'm like I've gone to work I think only once or twice in the nearly seven years

I've had one and two kids I've ever called in sick to work because again I just I think because Liam is flexible it's very easy for me to turn around but then he's got clients dependent on him as well same with us but I think I just really struggle with

sorry I can't come in today I just I find it really difficult and that's why any time I'm ill I go to work yeah um so I've been I've been guilty of that and I think there needs to be a balance because some people do take the myth I think that's the difference and I was even having this conversation with um a guy in my company yesterday like it's very easy to tell the because you know he runs a team and he was saying look I'm flexible you know I don't micromanage I don't, you know, set standards. I'm very flexible.

Like if you've got something that's cropped up, cool. If you need to leave a bit earlier, cool. But for the people, because he's got a team full of great people that don't take the mix and they make up the time and they work really hard anyway and you've already worked probably 10 hours over. So if you need to leave half an hour early, no problem. So he's very flexible because he's got good people. And that's a great environment to be in.

But you unfortunately have people that don't. put in the extra work don't put in that you know extra time and effort and whenever they can they take the mick and then they yeah they just take it sometimes sometimes then the rest of the team who are working hard can get kind of yeah yeah not punished but you know like yeah yeah for that you know for that you know things might become more restrictive because something hasn't been yeah that will that will absolutely happen and you know there's been times where you know I'm part of the recruitment process as well and people that I've crossed in the industry or I know a little bit about, you know, I've been very hesitant for them to join us because I know your

work ethic. I know what kind of person you are. I know, you know, your kind of morals and things. And yeah, we've got a great team and we've got a lot of A players and they bring it. And potentially I'm worried about you joining and kind of showing them certain things that you really, you know, that bring the, that bring the team on in a way. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So that's, but I think it was, it was really hard to make the decision to leave because, like you say, in the previous company that I was in, I was great in my job.

I was working well. I was progressing. And I liked the company and some of the people to a degree, but there was a lot of internal politics happening and it was ruining it. And it was really the nail in the coffin was coming back from maternity leave a case. Yeah. One feeling a little bit pushed into it. but also like I was just coming home and complaining like oh this happened today or this happened this person did and then Liam's like you know it's not even the job that's stressful it's the people that you're working with and then I was like I like casein doesn't deserve to have me work all day to then come home to come home you know gone six o'clock have an hour with him before he goes to bed and actually just be moaning all the time getting you down yeah so at that point I'd done for really Reasons that shouldn't be in a way.

Exactly. A lot of things just got brushed under the carpet and it was getting worse and worse and worse. And it was like, I can see that nothing's, I've given time, things aren't getting better, it's been noted, it's been flagged, things are still the same. So yeah, it was. And enough is enough?

It was a shame. How did you, did you just, like, go? Like, did you just not, how did you do it? Like, I don't know, because I've never actually kind of, I've left one job, I think, where I literally was in a restaurant when I used to work as a waitress. and we had an argument something and I've just literally just walked out the restaurant

and two of my friends when you didn't have contracts you just got cash in hand so you can walk out and the two of my friends who I walked with followed behind and we literally left this restaurant they had no wages to serve food or nothing but that's the only way I've ever

what I can think of anyway that I've left a job but obviously yeah but your previous clinic you would have had to have like handed in notice or done it officially because you're on contract No, that was more of like a, how did it end?

This ended very bad, didn't it? So it ended up, it was more that she, I was pushed out. Yeah. In that way. Right. And then it went into loads of legal battles and, yeah, yeah, yeah. But no, I didn't even have to sit down and I sat down a few times and told people, my, I wasn't happy and that the team wasn't happy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, and try, like you say, try and flag it. Try and fix it. Yeah. but at that time it just gone too far basically so but how did did you just think now I'm not saying that today and they just kept ringing your phone or?

No you can't do that not in corporate companies in contract no I think I'd made the decision and I mean I was forward and backwards because you know like it's just I just felt like I was giving up or quitting and it's not me like I would just keep going but then I was like it's pushed me

to the breaking point and I'd already, it wasn't just the people, but I'd worked my ass off and I'd put in so much time and effort, so many over hours because, you know, at one point I was working in an area and other people had left and it's like, I still delivered the target that three people were given by myself. You know, I really, really went above and beyond. So it was little things like not feeling that appreciated. And then on top of it, all the, you know, people politics and stuff. So I'd made the decision. I hadn't decided where I was going or what I was doing,

but I just made the decision like, I'm done. Like, I have nothing left to give. So there was a little bit of like forward and backwards of trying to think of ways that they could get me to stay. Because like I say, I've got on with like my managers and, you know, even the head of Spain and things. So, you know, oh, can we do this? Can we do that?

And I was like, I just don't see a good. future because you know of the people that you have it's just not going to get it's just gone too far now and now because i've made that decision yeah now you want to say that yeah we can do anything yeah and it's too late i've already tried that yeah yeah yeah but it wasn't even to do anything it was how can we put a band-aid on it and like move things and try and make it work but you're still not dealing with the the culture issue that you have in the company so yeah even with that i'd made the decision but you know it was amicable to a degree agree they understood um i was one of the only ones that actually while i was at the people that

had left that actually worked their notice period so you have um or my contract was four weeks or a month notice period so normally in a company like that because of a lot of sensitive data and stuff like that normally if you say you're leaving they just take it all and you go on what they call garden leave so they pay you for the month but they don't want you in the company right um because obviously you've got access to to data and stuff but you know they knew what type of person I am. They knew that, you know, there was nothing malicious there. So I worked my notice period. And, and then I left. But yeah, that was a, that was, it's hard. Going into it. I don't really remember the conversation of how I said I was late. Oh, actually, I wrote out a

resignation letter. I had to Google how to do it because I'd never resign from a job before. So I mean, I don't. So I mean, I don't. So I copy and pasted this resignation letter that was like, you know, please take this as my resignation. Yes, there's copy work. and then I had to like put the date of you know and everything and then I put a you know a few sentences of you know unfortunately whatever you know maybe we'll work together in the future kind of I kind of kept it nice but like this is my resignation letter so I remember going in and handing it over I don't think he even opened it there and then because I kind of handed it and I had to say what it was so it's weird because I barely remember that conversation but I just

remember being so nervous even though I shouldn't have been but I just take all these things really to heart and passionately. Yeah. I remember more how I told him that I was pregnant. Yeah, well, that conversation I remember more than I do actually resign him. Yeah, I was. Oh, it's horrible. Yeah, that feet. It shouldn't be horrible.

You should be absolutely happy. I cried. I cried telling my boss I was pregnant. I was, oh, I will work and I was, oh, I promise you, I will be here. It was just like, why don't you just go, yay, I'm pregnant, and it's a good thing, you know? Yeah, no, I was the same. And like the first time, I'd worked at the company for like six years. I paid my dues.

I'd blood, sweat and tears. Like, I deserve this break. Not that it's a break, but you know what I mean? I remember I told one, a colleague of mine just before. And then I was like, walked in and, yeah, I was sweating. My heart was going. And I was like, oh, my God. And I kind of just blurted it out.

And to be fair, he was happy for me. Like, obviously, he'd seen me grow from when I joined, you know, from 21 to, like 27, I was there. I should expect it. Not should expect it, but as, you know. Yeah, exactly. At some point they knew, but it was going to happen. And obviously, like, he, he'd met Liam stuff.

So, like, he knew me a little bit on a person. We weren't friends outside of work, but he knew me on a bit on a personal level. So, yeah, like, from what he expressed, he was happy. So I was like, oh, felt better. But that conversation was horrible. And then with my boss and my company this time, I felt almost work because last time I felt like no I paid my dues I've put in a lot of work whereas this time I mean I'd still been there a couple of years and I'd obviously done the same

worked really really hard and you know grown and made the company you know a lot of money but I was right in this period of you know we're investing a lot into you and you know you're in charge of it all and you know we're the results are all kind of on your shoulders even though I had a team like obviously supporting me in that I was looking after but it was like yeah again i know that but can i just say something well i rambled and i couldn't get it out and i was like oh you know i'm just waffling um and then when i actually said it he was like i thought you were about to tell me you were quitting like this is a he was relieved yeah yeah yeah obviously he was again not a company that i've ever felt you know look like annoyed at things

like oh kids and oh off sick and oh you know i genuinely could feel that they were happy for me um which is nice but yeah again just I went and spoke to another colleague and I was I don't know what to say how do I do this oh my god and I'd waited a little bit longer um to tell them I think I was I think I told my company when I was four months I didn't actually announce it to everybody the second time until I was five months so it's a lot further than yeah than I was when I was casing because we we went through some things before getting pregnant this time and but yeah once I kind of said it I was like really but yeah he was thought you were going to quit on me like thank god you're not kind of relieved at the same time so yeah no

i don't know it's just and obviously to to join this company i had to to kind of resign from the estate agent i was working for as well and that was horrible as well and i put that off for like a week um to yeah and again once i kind of sat down and got it out they were happy for me you know we talked and it was like look this amazing opportunities come along i kind of been head hunted they put a really great package together for me and he was like, look, you know, I've worked in London I get how, you know, like I'm happy for you it was all fine. I was like

Oh, but again I think it's how Just get myself so worked up and I'm like, why do you care so much? And I'm like, I don't know, I'm stressed. Yeah, it is that. It is, I think, and some people don't. Some people wouldn't like I say. Some people don't just turn up and you're thinking of. Well, some people, you know, sign off sick.

Don't have a second thing. And obviously sick is there for a reason and you can't sign yourself of sick. Doctors are involved. Like I get it. And there's absolutely. cases for that and I am behind when you know when it's necessary absolutely take it but there's a lot of people that play the system and stuff and the same don't feel bad

for it the children thing like having the I think some people like I've said it take the take the make with that and then sometimes people do become a bit more um I can't think the word but against the having the the mum to do the mum things because someone has taken the mit with it all you know what I mean it makes you all feel a bit against it doesn't. Yeah. But if you all are all in it together and have that balance and respect and appreciate, then the results where you've said it with your company

is amazing. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, I've, I haven't had to say that I've leaving really, so that's, I've just walked out one place, but that's when I was young and it's different. Yeah. Yeah, I've never just walked out my job and left a place in a chair. But telling them,

obviously being pregnant, I remember Morgan I cried I think I just cried I've more worried it was such like as I was worried it was such a strange feeling you feel guilty and bad for like oh my god I'm pregnant it's like well Morgan you plan yeah exactly yeah

so it's like I want this for me but I feel really bad and like I'm letting everyone down and I'm so sorry although obviously initially all the years I worked there they was good they was they was relaxed with that kind of thing but I was just more thing like

yeah i will be here i'll come back and didn't you know rather than no this is my time i'm i'm growing a baby my baby and yeah you know whatever yeah again i'm not one to take the mic i'd obviously yeah it's probably frustrating for them halfway through the treatment i had terrible morning sickness well not even mourning just pregnancy all day sickness yeah exactly so just leaving treatments that's just go and be sick um but with lexie i think i was a bit more relaxed in saying it to be honest of i think you were all right any experiencing problems at that point. Yeah, maybe. Maybe, yeah, I was just a bit more like, yeah, this is me, this is, you know,

I am. Or maybe third time round, like, this is important. Yeah. I don't feel as bad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're looking like Heinz. I was like, no, I'm going to, this is my time and I'm going to try to do. Although, again, I still went back to work, like two, when she was two months or something. She was crazy. So young, because I remember being in treatments and literally leaking for one in she needed to be fed. I'm sitting there, you know, like in that feeling of, I know, I know, she's got milk because of obviously I've expressed it but you know just that well I should be at home shouldn't I yeah I didn't really think like that at the time you know it was just more oh no I'm leaking

yeah yeah and I think like you say for us when we jump back in we can like jump back in and that was part of my worry of going back after maternity leave because I know how hard I work and how much I put in like this is going to be a lot sometimes you're ready for it it's worked out really really yeah of the time so I mean where you had that bit of like just a little bit of extra time going back changing my role a little bit it's just as much if not more responsibility but like just less demanding in terms of you know the amount of people that need me on a daily like contacting like that's gone down a little bit uh which feels like less intense but you're still getting the results from the but the level of responsibility the amount of people that i'm actually like

responsible for as well is is actually more but i'm just not being contacted and pulled in as many directions i feel like as i used to be but people some parents don't go back to work yeah and and although i think that's great sometimes i think then they can feel that they're falling into just being you know yeah mom yeah and not not who they are whether it's who they are or their work work yeah um position you know you know that well i think there's always that joke of like uh like oh if my husband was rich i wouldn't work. I don't think that would be me. No. No. Like there was never a conversation that I've had with how could how can we make it work that I don't have to go back to work? Like it's just I just it's just not for me. I think it's really important for the mind. I've noticed I've along the years

and stuff that I've seen that that people who retire when they kind of retire and don't do nothing. They do deteriorate a lot faster. Whereas when they start actually living their life and actually doing stuff and no restrictions because they haven't got work hours or, you know, thinking about money because then they get the pension or whatever it is. You know what I mean? That they're a bit more free. I do find that they seem to look a lot more healthier and happier and you know what I mean. So I think that that plays a big part. Yeah. Whereas if you're just, I don't mean this is like stuck at home and life. Yeah. If you don't go and do stuff for yourselves, whether it's, I don't know,

a run or a jog or a paddle lesser. Well, I think that can happen even if you're working. If you're in a very kind of repetitive job where you're not thinking very much. Or like you say, you're staying at home and you're just in the flow of every day is the same. Like, was it, Grand Hogdale where it's just repetitive? Then, yeah, you don't exercise your mind. You don't feel the best that you can feel. You don't feel great in yourself.

And yeah, I don't think it's never been something for me, you know. And I know some people, they stay at home for however many years till the kids like go to school and then they go back into the workplace or they just stay at home the entire time their kids are, you know, basically until they're adults and they move out and, you know, each to their own. Which is great if you've got, as what I'm saying, if you've got a good balance of what you do. But yeah, I think if you are a stay at home parent, then you need to have a little bit of something going on as well. To keep your mind healthy. Whether that's, you know, I really enjoy cooking. So I'm going to, you know, have new recipes and, you know, something different. If you're always making the same food and there's no creativity, there's no thought process, there's nothing to kind of excite you, then, yeah, I think that's just going to get anyone down, isn't it?

Yeah. And same with work. If you do the same job every day, there's no creativity, there's no thinking, there's no, you know, growth development, then, yeah, you just kind of whittle away. Because I have days where, you know, when you just can't get motivated. Yeah. You know, where you just... Which is normal. Whether if it's just a normal day and you've just, your diary is full and you're doing what you do it.

But you just don't feel like you're kind of rolling through the day. Then some days you feel like, right, ready, you know, like that kind of a thing. Sometimes I don't know where to start. Yeah, no. Some days I've already done it before I've started. Exactly. I'm not saying that every day is fantastic. Yeah, there's days that I'm super overwhelmed and I'm.

I, like I say, don't know even where to start because I've got so much to do or, you know, trying to do something is not quite working or I'm struggling with something or, you know, other days where everything's landing great and it's fantastic and, you know, I'm in a flow and I get loads done. Like, it's very up and down, but as a whole, when you have a little bit of something different each day, it doesn't have to be completely different because some jobs and some home life, you can't do something different every day. But just like little changes.

I do. I think it makes a big difference. Yeah. I really do to everything. Keeps you. Mental. Yeah. Yeah.

I think as well for like our grandparents, like yeah, when you retire, you do do nothing. And like that, like our grandparents and great grandparents, like they look, no offense, but they looked like old people. They looked more their age. Whereas I feel like. Frail and I feel like the, the generations like coming like it's harder to. to see how old a man is, how a woman is, because they do take, I think it's more education

as well. Like there's more education with like taking care of yourself. Health is more of a priority now. But yeah, I think I just, you have to push yourself even when you've retired. Even, well, for example, my nanny cook, bless her, I felt that, you know, let's just say she would have a week in because the weather was rubbish, for example. She hadn't got to her bingo and knew she was going to go and see and they're standing there. You know, you're going to see a bit of a, you know, whereas obviously when I couldn't catch her at home because she was always out, which is why we had to get her a mobile, 90 old years old, that you just see a better kind of, you know, obviously then age is a thing and obviously the body

can't, you know, and that was another factor. But I did see that difference of when she was more doing stuff out and about and doing a bingo and meeting people, meeting all, you know, and bingo is great for the mind. Yeah, for sure. When I went with her, I was, literally, I could not keep her. I mean, obviously, as the older she got she couldn't hear. She couldn't hear him so she obviously missed them but honestly I'd be like what we want? Let me do you on your pad to see if I'm missing. How are you going so fast? Yeah it was thinking about it. And like you say age is a thing so I'm not saying you age can't affect you but yeah like I think there's like my granddad's in his 60s approaching his 70s he still

works out he's still like weight trained. He's always like been into his fitness and the way he looks and he does not look his age and he's still capable. You're not always going to be. as capable as you are as you get older. I'm not as capable of things that I was, you know. Sometimes I think I can and I'm like, actually, no, no. Exactly, you know. So age does get you, but I think, yeah, we can continue to challenge ourselves the older we get.

And I think that is going to keep you going longer, whether it's mentally, mental stimulation, physical. Don't get me wrong. Sometimes I do look at some people, like maybe, my dad, my, who's literally like double my age. And I'm just like, how do you do it? Because I feel like I cannot get there. now so you know like you just think i've got the energy to do that yeah like yeah if i'm like you

at your age i'll be happy you know um so yeah it is uh i just see that difference of people who keep more of an active yeah mentally or physically you know it does make a difference i think when i think when you really slow down which you're going to slow down anyway i'm not saying that people in the 80s and 90 you should be like running marathons no absolutely not i'm not saying that but I think couldn't even do it now let alone exactly that's what I mean like there there needs to be like that balance but I think when people really slow down completely stop then you you do age a bit faster or your age catches up with you whereas yeah you need to you know walk go for a walk every now and then play a mental game every now and then like

you need to exercise to keep going yeah I feel that I have to that's why I was glad that we started done not that we've kept up to it but I have my reason for that one we will go back yeah I think it just run away with us we were really good for about four or five months we stuck to it um but then like I say the main thing was I went on holiday so I missed a month's worth of uh of rehearsals the performance we were supposed to do was the day after I got back from America so it was impossible for me to be able to commit to it but then with all the rain we had it kept getting delayed and we obviously hadn't gone to practice to know and my mom has just become it was becoming more of a stress for me than a release of you know because they had a lot of performances coming up so it's like i don't go for it but i just want to relax i don't know any of the stress that i don't want to feel about the stress about the one thing that i relax about it's like case and he's got um his drama and he loves it and they're practicing for a performance and she turned around a couple of weeks ago and was like oh we've changed it because he was his character changes bodies and they were going to have someone back and they were going to have someone back and

backstage keep the voice but be in Kaysen's body so then he was going to mouth the words where she was after you know months she's just said oh that's going to be really too boring for him so we've given loads of lines he's got a lot of lines lesson for a six year old he's his memory is fantastic and he's very capable it's quite a lot pressure but getting him to practice like he he doesn't want to practice yeah and it's a big obviously it's a big responsibility for him yeah and he's got the rest of the cast that are yeah going to do the show and you know what I mean obviously he's only young so it's got to be fun at the same time but well that's it is finding that balance because he loves it and he knows that he's

going to have to do a show and he knows he wants to get there to be able to know the lines to do it but in order to do that you've got six scenes worth of lines and some of them are like five six sentences all back to back together like in order to get their case and you've got to do a little bit each day so it's like trying to get that to sink in and he moans and groan but when we're actually in it he does it for a little bit so I'm trying to us like look, 10, 20 minutes every day will get you when you need to get to by June. Waiting like once a week,

like it's just not going to, it's just not going to hit. But he's, he learnt like a whole scene in about 10, 15 minutes. Like, he's very good and capable. But it's trying to teach him like a little bit every day. So it's not catching up with you the day before. Because I'm the same sometimes. I know I should be doing it, but just to go to do something about, oh. Yeah.

You know? I think of the seven days I'm like, right, I'm already done it. I'm excited. Yeah, let's go. No, no, it's hard. But it's just not, like you say, falling into anything too deep. Yeah. You know?

And having a home and a friendship group and a work group. It's hard to balance everything, you know, to, you know, progress in your career, keep kids healthy, have personal time, be a good wife. Like, there's a bloody lot of things to do. Like, sometimes I'm going to be a great wife one day and other days I'm going to be a good mum. And other days I'm going to smash work and then I'm not going to be able to talk after work. So it's like we can't be all these things all day every day. Like I think I saw

someone say like it comes in seasons and you just have to accept that you can't be everything to everyone in one day. Like you say, I might be a great mum today. But I might not, you know, even have two sentences, conversation with Liam. Yeah. Things happen. Exactly. You know, so it's like not putting your pressure on yourself to be everything to everyone every day. Yeah, not putting that too much pressure on yourself. I think a little bit of pressure to get yourself, you know, to where you want to, what you want to do and wait.

Or to be stuck in one area for too long. To focus so much on work and that everything else drop for a long time is detrimental. But like, yeah, if you've got a deadline coming up, if you've got things to do and work has to take priority for a couple of days or for a week or, you know, a bit longer, then yeah. And then you, you know, come back round, you move things back and then you focus on different areas. I think the bigger problem is when you,

when you try and do it all or where you stay in one area for too long or don't ask for help when you need it yeah I'm not very good at that no no that's probably one of my biggest weaknesses I'll just figure it out but

yeah always ask for help yeah there you go but from the right people does that make sense well yeah I mean it's hard because there's a lot of people that influence your life right whether that's parents friends colleagues

other moms you know people you look up to online whatever but it's very easy to look at other people and even just here people's going to give you their advice whether you ask for it or not people that are close to you and it's very hard sometimes to go hold on a minute I wouldn't trade places with you or you've not achieved what I'm looking to achieve because we're different people we have different goals whatever not to put someone down but like you're not going for the same goals that I'm going for. So respectfully, you know, your opinion is fine, but I'm not going to take it. Yeah.

But it's very hard. I hear it, but it's not, doesn't really resonate anything. Yeah. Well, it's hard because sometimes you like, it might be from a parent. It might be from a best friend. So it's like you, you value them and you value their opinion to an extent. But it's like, and sometimes you just take it for like, oh, well, you know, I trust you, I respect you.

I'll just take your advice. But unless you've been where I'm one of. go or you've experienced what I'm going through, maybe sometimes you should actually seek advice from people that have been there and done what you're trying to achieve. Yeah, completely. Not just people that are in your life. Just because you're my best friend or my brother.

Yeah. It doesn't mean you're entitled. Yeah, that's it. Because it's always unsolicited advice. Sometimes you don't even ask for it, but you get it. And like I say, there's plenty of times where, you know, I've listened to my mom and, you know, you know, yeah, yeah, you're right or whatever.

And nine times out of ten, she is right. That wasn't a very good example, but I'm putting your mum in on it. No, but at the same time, I'm the first one out of my family to go to uni. I'm the first one out of my family to have a corporate job. Like, there's only so much advice you can give me, but you've not been in my situation. You've not gone to where I've gone to. So there's at some point and some situations I have to look to other people. I appreciate it and respectful, however, I'm going to just do it this way.

And yeah, part of the reason why I'm good at what I do is because of what I've learned. from parents from friends from everyone and I can take bits but then at the same time you don't all have the same goals and you're not all going for the same thing and you know what you think successful is is not what I think and you know

so to a degree you actually just have to trust yourself or look for advice in places from people that have achieved what you want to achieve yeah I think that's the best way you can have support from people close to you but yeah just don't take everyone's word is gospel especially people that preach in when they have not done what you want. Usually the louder ones anyway that don't really know what they're talking about.

No, it's true. Like you'll never get criticism from someone who is performing or at a higher place than you, whether that's financially, whether that's spiritually, whether that's, you know, professionally, you know, whatever. Someone who kind of you look up to and is where or has things that you want, they're never going to look down at you. the people that criticize the most are the people that are you know you kind of maybe surpassed in whatever respect or can see you try in like that way of yeah like and it's always hate from people that are jealous or see you as a threat or you know try and put you down because oh

it's easy for you or you know it's basically a reflection they can't do it so they're just going to try and put you down and make you think that you can't do it probably a little less educated, whether that's in life or... Yeah, I saw an experience, an example. Like, if there's someone in the gym who's like really, like, muscley, they take care of themselves, they go regularly, if there's someone that's overweight, that's starting off at the gym, they're not going to look and laugh. Other people that are probably similar size or haven't got off onto their journey

of taking care of themselves, they're the ones that laugh. Someone who's actually been there, done that and grinded and knows what it takes is going of saying it's going to be like you know well done you you might only just be starting but well done you've tried good start exactly yeah good to be thinking oh I think it yeah support yeah exactly so yeah look at look up to people that have actually done what you want to achieve and yeah yeah we'll all take that into line next be a nice person support people and yeah care but not touch you but the people who don't care about you right well uh hopefully that gives you oh no we haven't prepared a game oh damn we'll have to

we'll prepare one for next time yeah we'll give people advice on maybe how to and how not to tell your boy you're pregnant that's true how to resign how not to resign so yeah we've uh we've done a lot of um stories and advice yeah a few experiences thrown in there so but we'll prepare a game for next time because you do like the games. I do. I do. Right. Have a good week. Happy Friday. Adia.