The Rising’s Growing Together Podcast - Birthday Parties, Sleepovers & Gift vs Experience What Really Matters in Childhood? Ep.07

Episode Date: May 12, 2025

Are big birthday parties really worth it? Are sleepovers a parenting rite of passage or just a logistical nightmare? In this episode of Growing Together, Billie and Charlotte share personal stories and honest opinions on how childhood celebrations have evolved and what truly leaves a lasting impact on kids. What We Cover in This Episode: • The magic and pressure of 1st birthday celebrations • Are sleepovers still a thing or are they too risky now? • Why intentional celebrations may mean more than big, flashy parties • The big debate: Are experiences more meaningful than gifts? • Nostalgia talk: Carnival week at school and how school traditions shape usIf you’ve ever felt overwhelmed planning a birthday or wondered how to make moments more meaningful for your kids this one’s for you. Don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT & SUBSCRIBE for more honest conversations on parenting, life, and growing together. Follow us: www.linktr.ee/therising1111New episodes every Friday Hosted by Billie & Charlotte best friends, ambitious mums, and career women sharing real-life moments and meaningful discussions.#parentingpodcast #birthdayparties #SleepoverDebate #GiftVsExperience #modernparenting #mumlife #growingtogetherpodcast #parentingrealtalk #childhoodmemories #intentionalparenting

Hi guys. Hey, welcome back for another episode. They're back, we're back. So, tell us what have you been up to this week? Me. Oh, okay. So, well, it's been carnival week. True, true.

Took a lot of time up at home, especially in the morning. I just missed that, to be honest. And I was a little bit gutted because I do enjoy carnival week for the kids. But, yeah, we get away with that. So what we did have to do? That was it. So every day you have to do something. So first day they had to have something around their neck.

The second day they had to have like crazy hair. Third day, pajamas. So by the end of it they're doing all three. Yeah, because they add one each day. That's it. And then at the end of the week they did like a parade around the streets of the school with all music. The final fancy. Well, no, they did a theme during, through the whole school of like a circus theme.

So for example, Morgan was like a weightlifter and let me. He was the ring master in her class. Yeah. Not just her, like her whole class and then Morgan's whole class. So each class was a different thing to do with the surface. Yeah. And then they was obviously making all that during the week, which was nice. And then they did a parade and showed us all with music and whatever else.

So yeah. It is nice that they do that and they get involved and they make like a whole week of it. Yeah, it is. It's fun. It's just something fun and why not? So yeah. I don't actually know anything about it and why. like the reason of it but no I'm not sure just go with it because it's fun and the kids have

fun and yeah it's no harm 21 yeah so that was my week normally that hard even they're like obviously the final costume is specific but like throughout the week normally it's stuff at home like say you know Kaysen's never done the mad hair one yeah but he's done like um yeah wear something on your head wear something around your neck and obviously it's whatever you've got so we've been had similar ones like every year and this was the first year for in a while that they kind of changed it up a little bit with them like that. Yeah. Which is quite nice. Or like odd socks and shoes and that being like that.

Yeah. Which I hate the odd socks. One because it messes my drawers up. Much it drives me mad. I'm like, no, if you wear these odd socks, they wear these odd socks tomorrow, but they don't. They change them to a different pair. And then you've got four pairs that are all muddled up. So yeah, I was glad to not have that one in that.

In the itinerary of this week's carnival. But yeah, no, it was fun, fun week. Yeah. It's funny because I don't think in England, like, I used to get so excited for a non-school uniform day and like plan it. Like, especially when you get to like 11, well, just before 11, because I come here at 11. So, yeah, like 10 and it's like such a big thing. But I don't really notice that they do any of that anymore. I think England got quite strict and boring with as that.

I wouldn't know what they do. Apart from the book one. Yeah, I like that. Well, Book Day. Yeah, that's quite a thing. Yeah, I like that. Yeah. I do like that.

And I'm surprised that they don't do that here, actually. Yeah. But I suppose it falls in Carnival Week or around that time, doesn't it? In public schools here, they don't wear uniform, so that's... Yeah. Non-uniform day every day, isn't it? Which for them, they don't think about. So it's not a thing, you know?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's true. I completely forgot. Yeah, of course. It's great for them, but for us, I mean, parents, it's, I think it's... As a mum of a boy, it's really don't bother me, Casey, like, trousers, t-shirt, jumper, all similar colours, similar palettes because it's the colours. It's just for me, then you're...

It's very easy to throw it together. It just minimises, for me, the wardrobe. And then I'm like, well, they're school clothes. Yeah. They're not because they just wear the... But you know what I mean? They just had a uniform. I know I used to try it with Mason when he started

to put him in like grey trousers or grey shorts and just a white polo. Just to have some kind of, you know, that's for school and then you've got all your clothes then, do you know what I mean? But it don't work like that here, so it is what it is. To be fair, whatever's in his wardrobe he wears. He's got the odd one where it's like a nice, like, top or jumper

that, yeah, I don't tend to put him in that just in case it gets ruined and up till now it's been absolutely fine but he has started to slide on his knees and get knee holes in his trousers which have told him multiple times to stop doing um but apart from that he doesn't actually get that dirty or wrecked you know where it's like as bad as it sounds as in oh you know that but it is it is still long but i've got used to it now as it's just how it is it's the norm now isn't it for us it was just the initial thing of getting used to because we were used, even for us, they were used to go to school with a uniform.

Yeah. But then we only had a little bit of time and then we had the fabulous uniform of our liminald. That's what I mean, that's what I mean. We still always had a uniform. God, that was pure Fresh Prince of Bel Air track suit. Shell suit. On it, it was.

That material. Oh my God. Yeah. It's a lot better now. I see. Yeah, the material was a lot better. The colours are a lot better. Ours was like 90s with a big green and yellow V on like a proper.

We definitely wouldn't get lost. No. And it's a good publicity thing, like advertisement thing of, oh, where have they come from? Yeah, and they were so expensive. And I remember at the start of the year, I burnt a whole iron in the trousers because it was that horrible material that just catches fire. Like, very not safe. And I had a hole like that in the bum of my taxi bottoms. And my mum was like, I was like, I was like, 70 weeks.

Like, yeah, I ain't mind you knew it. It's the start of the year and you fucked up. So, yeah, I ended up. up having my jumper tied around my waist for the year just felt like it felt like a year probably wasn't she probably caved in and got me that but i felt like forever but they didn't let you tie your jump around the waist never and i was like what do you expect me to do it was right i mean it had the lining of the trousers on the underneath yeah it wasn't like a see-through hole you couldn't see my my bum but it had like the white lining of the inside of the trackwood but all the

blue yeah there was a hole and i say it was that big it was probably that big but still no that was awful track soup that was that was like that was like that was that was like that was But yeah, no, talking about like celebrations and fancy dress and all that has got me thinking, I've got to soon to be have a one-year-old. So, shit. Yeah. I mean, he's nine months old, but still got a couple of months. Yeah, you do have to.

But the first year after, well, that's my question. That's my question. Because first birthday is like, oh my God, first birthday. And for Kaysen, I had a big party at my mom's house. I had a big barbecue. I had all my friends, their kids. I mean, he was at nurse, no, he wasn't at nurse. We started a nursery just after.

So, yeah, it was literally my friends and their kids. But I had a character come dressed as Marshall from Paul Patrol. I had a big cake made. Yeah, there was probably 20, 30 people. What do you not think you're going to do the same? No, I think that was well over the top. Yeah, yeah. I think what happens is you, well, for me, it would be the same in that kind of experience.

I probably did. You know it initially, you do. all the big things and then I was experienced girls on you're like I don't really need to do it although I don't know what I'm doing I don't even dress Hayden he stays in his onesie pyjamas like and then he just gets a fresh pair every day like at night time bath new pyjamas bed and then he wears them yeah I don't even dress him casein had a whole River Island wardrobe exactly that's comparison of your first second you do learn it is so yeah that's my thought process what am I going to do is it I do think they deserve a celebrate

I know that sounds like he's being punished, he deserves the celebration. Yeah. He deserves to have a celebration because it is his first birthday and not just for use to celebrate that with him, but maybe, you know, his family and, you know, you're close people who want to celebrate him becoming one. Do you know what I mean? Yeah.

And it is for the memories as well for you. I know that's it. I know a lot of people go, well, they're not going to remember. They're not going to remember. And it's like, yeah, but if you wait till they remember, then you've lost four or five years of your own. memories as parents. Yeah.

So it's not just for their memories. It's your own memories. You're going to remember their first birthday and they're going to ask them at some point. Even that, you saying that, I've been going through all my, sorting all my memory boxes out and going, I was actually quite surprised at the reaction from my children, even now at their age. Yeah. At how excited they was to go through everything.

Yeah. And obviously, with Mason, I keep everything. So he's got his bits and he's got his invite of his first birthday. part three what he was given out to everyone yeah um and that then brings back memories because obviously it says where it was what time it was um jammie's got the picture of him on you know how to do them them ones because it's my first i don't think i ever did any none of the bell was got a text are you coming or not yeah um so yeah so going going through that it was nice that their reaction was like oh it's lovely going seeing all you know what what you did for me

because obviously they don't know and if you don't come a memory in the memory box. Yes. How do you remember what has happened? Because you think you're, I would never forget. But it's like, think back to what did you like to do for a fourth birthday? What did you do for a seventh birthday? You can't remember. So you have to put these

like memories away. I finally remember what I did this week. I have to go on my phone to check. Yeah. I can't even remember what I did for my birthday and I'm an adult. And things, it kind of wears off as you get older. But yeah, I think I want to do something. I want to celebrate it. It's the memories, I think. But yeah, I'm not going to do a big

thing and invite lots of people it's whoever wants to come they's got to be hated to you and what you know you know i mean like i don't i wouldn't say don't ever do the big celebrations yeah big things like that um but like you say you've kind of learned from your your your your experience of doing that elshabang with with case and that i don't think i'm going to do so much for hayden it's not really exactly the the people that came would be the same people it's not like i invited loads of people that i didn't want to i just like you say it was more paying 100 odd quid for a car or 50 quid whatever it was so yeah for a guy to come dressed in a suit for 10 minutes that he cried out i'm trying to eat his arms me he probably did i mean

all the other kids enjoyed it so it wasn't a waste but yeah just a couple of those extras that you know it doesn't necessarily need the balloons and the decorations and and a big cake obviously every i say everyone ate the cake they didn't they maybe ate half yeah and then i took half of it home to getting to, you know, play with it and take some photo. And I got a few photos of it. Yeah, absolutely hating and screaming that he's got cake on his hands. So that was, again, funny memory. So, yeah, I think I'll do something similar

because that was at my mum's house. So it wasn't like I paid for a big event space. I paid, you know, these party planners, loads of money for all these balloon art and shit. I didn't do any of that. And I know people do that. And if they enjoy that and that's what they want to do to celebrate, then. Yeah, I've got nothing against people.

Don't just for me and my experience. It's not. If that's what you really want. Not for the Instagram likes. Yeah. Or for the Instagram show off. Yeah, I suppose. Mine prefer the them kind of a, you know, things.

Yeah. Celebration should do. Well, I think, well, Kaysen's coming up to seven. And I think out of six birthdays we've done, I did the first one at my mum's house, the second one at my nan's house. Third, fourth, maybe fifth here. there was one where I invited some of his class friends and we went to street jump

but everything else was just in a like a home barbecue kind of thing and then like yeah one year when I think when he was four we had a magician that was quite good he enjoyed that and his friends enjoyed that I did one year with yeah you can't you can't know well yeah that's probably old school that reminds me of like kids birthdays and camping and stuff like that growing up yeah yeah yeah so yeah I think have a balance yeah and well I was just thinking about then with with when you were saying

about what case and done for his birthday. I remember once Morgan had a was it last year before he had a birthday and it was a big multi-adventure place and it was brilliant they did quad biking they did zip wire they did kayak they did I don't know everything you could imagine

what were they happy doing they made a little area wasn't even a pitch they made a little pitch and just played football on a little bit of concrete that was it there was a pool so they got jumping and cool down but generally they were playing football which they could dance anywhere And he took him in the street, you know?

So that just shows, you know, yeah. Yeah, I think one year before one of Kayson's birthdays we did hit, I took him, quad biking, horse riding and paddle boarding. He actually did it, to be fair. I was a bit worried that he wouldn't get on the horse and stuff. But yeah, sometimes it's, you feel like you need to end. Like, presents-wise, when they're little, you feel like you have to get lots of presents and you have to do these big things.

Yeah, I'm guilty of that. Yeah, you're, you find it hard to stop and draw the line. My mum definitely, as we grew up, just had to do big things and it had to all be equal. The kids all have the same thing. Not like one's expensive this year, one's not so much. So it will all balance out because they'll want it another, you know, like if she spent that on that one, they had to have that. And she's very equal and fair like that. But yeah, she's not sure I'm the same.

She struggles to, she feels like she has to do so much. Yeah. So it's like the big presents and then the small presents and then loads of little presents. Well, yeah, because if you think of what Mason would get to what Lexi would get, but cost-wise, if anything, I'm going to put it that way, there's a huge difference. His one thing would, probably wouldn't even fill Lexi's hold. Do you know what I mean?

But then one day, she's going to be his age and she's going to have that money then. Yeah. It doesn't have to be in the same. No, yeah, yeah. So, yeah, I don't think I'd feel like the money, monetary value. I'd have to spend the same because they're going to get the same. as they grow up anyway it's just going to you know not like you're treating them differently they're just different ages yeah yeah um I know I know I know that I tell me yeah I still get that

but I do the same thing I'm like right I'm gonna be good this year I'm gonna get him a couple of things he's asked for and I'm not just gonna you know get things for the sake of getting things and then I will last minute grab a couple of extra things and they generally tend to go to waste because yeah he's appreciative but yeah not things he's asked for or anything like that but oh he's only got three or four I need to give five or six or seven yeah yeah yeah it's a weird. Yeah. It's fun from how we think, isn't it?

And as, for party-wise, mine are all summer. So, you. Yeah. June and August. Yeah. So it's thinking, especially here, it's very hot. That's it. I always wanted a summer very, because I'm November.

So I always wanted it. But then actually now, especially because we've done some things at home, I'm like, oh, I need a gazebo. Yeah. I need a shade. A case of art. So it'll be outside because it'll be nice and warm. Yeah. A lot of the time.

Yeah. And a lot of the time. the kids aren't even in the pool I think maybe one year they were in the pool but the rest of the time they're all just playing in the garden and stuff so yeah it's um having some shade which we didn't have in our garden so now we've got a gazebo yeah well it's when so as mine have grown up they've obviously it's a bit easier because then they they more or less tell you what they want and who they want to come yeah you know because i think well for me when they're younger you invite the whole class and then you've got all your group of friends and then you've got your family and da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da do you know what yeah Well, Kaysen's this last year. I separated because I was like, I can't have 40 people in my house. So we did like a family day and then I did like our friends and the kids. And luckily Kaysen is August, so they're not at school. So if I want to invite people from school, I can reach out to people.

But if it's easy to just keep it as our friendship group, because there's a lot of us as it is. Then, you know, I can do that. Hayden's falls just before they break up for school when he joined, when he eventually goes. it would be June handy um so yeah i mean a lot of the spanish tenders just do like a cast thing but then the last party case and went to was just at the park in san miguel and they put on like buffet like nibbles and drinks and the kids just pay that's the best thing that's probably they're not paying 25 30 euros per child to go i mean some people do but that's what i've seen anyway that's what the kids love them right yeah you know he loved he didn't want to go home he's there for

hours yeah i think we were literally there for about three hours yeah um and like you say street jumping these places are good but kids just like to hang out yeah just be around each other don't they so when it when it really comes down to it yeah yeah sometimes they think they know what they want as well yeah but even with with that with the class i mean as they've got older that you know they don't want to invite their whole class because they're not friends with their whole class do you know what i mean so and that's and they only might want three or four yeah i mean i don't agree with you've got 10 boys in the class you invite eight or nine no that's leaving people no no no but if you generally have a class of 20 kids and you're playing with three i don't see a

problem with inviting three or four or five like you either invite all of them or you invite a couple i don't agree with inviting the majority and leaving a couple no that that's nasty yeah but you know at the end of the day what what they want to do and yeah let them celebrate how they one, which as good easier as they get older, but when they're one, I need to make that to the show. Let's try planning hers like the year before. And I'm like, right, let's just get closer to the time because you might change on actually what you run by then, you know what I mean? So Kaysen doesn't necessarily know what he wants to do, but he knows the theme.

Oh, okay. He picks his theme. So every Thursday, it's been like a theme of like a character or like a show or whatever. So he knows his themes well in advance. So, yeah, he picks that out. And he never changes. There doesn't, that change. Very rarely changes in that year, to be honest.

honest, because it's normally whatever he's into and he's into it for normally quite a while. So, yeah, there's always like a character. So it's, you know, it's easy when it's a popular show, because then I can buy a decoration. But then sometimes he'll pick his theme, could you change that one? Yeah, random YouTube. They don't make decorations for that show. Yeah, there was a show that used to watch. What was it called?

The Fixies. It's on YouTube, and it's in. English but I think originally it's Russian and it was all about these little tiny it was these little tiny things that when people looked they turned into screws but only one boy knew that they were like little characters and they would go inside electronical things and it would teach you like they'd fix them and then it would teach them like the microwave works by this and this is broke I mean he used to watch us at like that case and all that yeah so he loved that show but yeah absolutely

Absolutely no characters, decorations, nothing even. I can't get that on the internet. So he had to change that. Saying about presents as well though, that changes because with mine, they used to, from one of their nan and grandads, they used to get gifts, obviously, what do you want kind of thing. And now what they absolutely love is they get picked up, they go shopping, have a look for something. they go for dinner, maybe get like a dessert, like an ice cream or whatever else, and have a couple of hours with their grandparents and then come home.

And that, for them, is the favourite, rather than just having the gear and going like that, I love that. Sometimes they don't even buy anything. Sometimes they don't see anything that they like and they just have the dinner and then she's, okay, well, here's a fraction of the prize. Honestly, they have the day and the experience. And the memory. Yeah, that's it.

That's the thing that I think they'll remember. more of what they did. But if I asked you, name me five presents that you had in my childhood. Do this to me? It's going to be hard. But if I say, like, name your favourite party that you had. Yeah. You can remember that more than you can remember the actual gift.

And it's the same as Christmas. Like, obviously, sometimes you remember the gift because you just wanted it so bad as a kid. That's the memory. Exactly. But, no, that's great. I think I looked at a thing even at give you a help on getting stuff. for kids for Christmas but it applies for any gifts and it was like you know an experience or something that they can wear something that they can play with like all different things

so that it's not just it's not just stuff and you know it happens every time it's one of their birthdays you've got my mum and dad leon's mom and dad aunties brothers uncles and cousins and friends and everyone what do they want and i don't want more plastic crap in my house like and anything main he wanted I've probably got so I find it really hard to and I want to be helpful because there's nothing worse than when you want to buy gifts someone yeah exactly that is true when what do you say what do you get someone yeah what do you get someone yeah and kids nowadays have everything yeah so it is hard to buy gifts and yeah I love that idea I think that becomes that's great yeah I think yeah whether you as parents do that whether the grandparents yeah

do it um i think that's that's a lovely idea or even a yes day yeah for example that whole for then now thinking that they just can do anything they want what they can they are yeah really what we think within reason within reason um before anyone wants to jump on it with next birthday um but uh really when it comes down to it ends up just the memory of the day yeah do you know what i mean and yeah i think that not from what you got thought yeah you know and i think that you Yeah, that because they don't actually know it's happening, but really, that is. No, I think that's great. I think building in like an experience as part of a gift is really good.

Because sometimes, like you say, the weeks go by, the months go by. And it's like, when was the last time you all actually did something different that you've never done before? Yeah, yeah. You know, or gone somewhere that you've never been before. And that is what the memory sticks in. Oh, we ended up finding this random little place or this weird restaurant or, you know, we found this shop. and do you remember that person walking down the street it all turns into stories doesn't it

and even well here in Spain they don't do birthday carts do it it's not a thing to on your birthdays to give a birthday it is for us really I know Spanish kids they normally they bring like sweets into school don't they for everybody else oh that was it I was going to say about the card thing

so Spanish don't do cards as a thing and we do but this so we've changed this with hours as well for me and Mitch what we've found and my my mum and dad always said it anyway they prefer to make one they want to receive a maid card

yeah rather than just any card to so and so from so and so yeah you know what I mean so now we literally don't buy yeah cards and we try to well for obviously family and yeah to be honest I've stopped buying cards um I know it's

nice in a way I do still have all yours I keep cards that have like a nice long message in it all yours do all yours have got look no I am 30 and

then I'm very good at writing messages and cards but yeah if like say if it's just two so and so then then yeah unfortunately it's going to get bit of the end of the day and it feels like a reason I hate doing it but I can't keep every card but then when they make one and it's

got a picture of me and them and then that goes in the number of us yeah exactly that yeah but from that side of it yeah things have changed you know, you used to, you know, don't get me wrong, I still, yeah, I still go for it on birthdays and stuff for them because it's once a year. Yeah. You should celebrate it. Yeah. But the truth of the matter, it isn't once a year because they end up getting stuff

more throughout the year nowadays. You know, I think when we were kids, it was that you didn't get toys every time you went to the shop or whenever people come over to see you and it wasn't as often. Because you laid your bed. Yeah. Woo. You know what I mean? You know, it is. Or, you know, you've just tagged along because we're going shopping, whatever and see something in the shops, you know. we didn't get as many treats, I don't think, on a, like on a daily, weekly, monthly basis that our kids do, you know. Then just comes home, like, oh, I saw this and thought you'd like it, you know,

which is lovely and it's exciting because it's a random day and you just got me something. It is great. So I don't want to snub it. No. But then at the same time, you know, it's nice to try and make a big point of their birthday, make them feel special. But it doesn't necessarily have to be through a massive parties and loads of presents. I saw something that was, um, they put,

like something up against their door and fill it with balloons so that when they open the door balloons fall on them. You know, just like little things of like whatever you want for breakfast is something different or special or like I say picking where you want to go for the day.

I think yeah, I think there's ways that we can put that more into like their birthday. That's what I've just with experience just realised that and other people's what they've done. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. That's a good idea.

I'll try that. Yeah. Yeah, you know. Definitely. I mean, like I say, with all people asking what they want, a lot of the time, and I don't want to take the money for, like, casing and stuff either, because, you know, having to, like, put it aside. And then you've got something.

That was from so-and-so. Yeah, exactly. So he has started to get himself Bitcoin, so he does have his own little Bitcoin wallet. So he's investing. What did you have a birthday? He does. Yeah, literally. From Leon's mom and dad.

they always ask what can we get them and I'm like right well he's got presents from everybody else you know find Bitcoin well I used that was a thing that my mum and dad did for mine and I think me when I was younger

you know set up a yeah trust fund or whatever they were called back then do you get what I make accounts yeah whatever they called yeah that kind of a thing it was like that to yeah not donate but yeah put it in yeah exactly if you've got like a save in a cabin yeah start putting things

Like you say, as they're younger, like if they're, oh, just put it in there, then... Rather than feel the need to have to go buy presents with it, because sometimes I'll go, I'll give you the money, get my present. And then I'm like, right, well, I don't want to just buy a present for the sake of it. So, yeah, maybe put money in a savings account, get some crypto for them. Whatever you fancy is. Whatever your fancy is. But, yeah, no, I think there's so many things we can do now.

So, yeah, the thoughts of that, really, of what to do for his first. but I think I'll do something low-key, just like close friends and family, maybe just to barbecue, even just to get us all together and have, yeah, celebrate it. Play, yeah, a little small cake, something. I can dress up as Spider-Man. Well, I was thinking I might dress up as Miss Rachel. That's what I'm. He's a good one. He'll be, it'll love it.

So, yeah, so that's the thoughts. And then, yeah, Katen's, he's having a Minecraft theme, obviously. That's his theme. That's his theme, this thing. because he's massively into Minecraft. Yeah, I asked him again, what do you want to do? And I said, I might just, I said, do you want to just invite a couple of friends?

And then I'll get maybe them like little teepee sleeper tents just for the lift room. Oh, yeah. Whether they actually sleep over or whether they just come for the day and play in it, whatever. But, yeah, how did she find that? She liked it. Lexi, absolutely loved it. Yeah. Lexi absolutely.

And the kids actually sleep over. All of them slept over. Yeah. There was a couple that hadn't slept out. out before who did really well do you know what I mean you think it's a big big thing isn't it yeah yeah um but for me obviously I think I was obviously panicking more you know because you've got the children who are not your children who don't sleep regularly you want them to feel comfortable and enjoy and you know if they just get to sleep yeah when they wake up in the

morning they're going to be so happy to be with everyone and carry on the jemming because it's not just like they get up and got quite a few sleepovers I've called my mom yeah like come put me out Yeah, I don't know if I did. Mine do. Yeah. But I probably did. Do you know what I mean? Or I just didn't go anywhere.

I just didn't even go and stay out. I had a lot of sleepovers at my house. As a kid, like I did, I had parties and I remember some of those parties really well. And then I had quite a few, as I got a little bit older, like sleepovers, where people would come around and, yeah, we'd have all duvays and we'd have sweets and popcorn and just play. I remember going to a few parties like that. Yeah. sleep over parties for there. But then I've seen a lot lately about not letting your kids sleep out because you've

never know. Yeah. I know. I know. So that freaks me out. Yeah. I don't have girls. It can happen to boys and girls.

Bad things happen. But yeah, obviously you're in much more control when kids come to you. And I know your house is generally the house that kids come to. It is the house where everyone sent. And I think I like the idea that I'd rather, yeah, tend to come to ours. Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah, how do you find is that when kids want to go out to people that you don't know?

Well, you don't plan. You don't let everything. If you don't know the parents, you don't let them. Not necessarily. So I think it's difficult because I think it's changes they get older, obviously. Yeah. If they get older, it becomes a different thing. And children.

So, you know, Lexi would sleep out anywhere with no question, you know. Whereas I know Morgan wouldn't want to. So it's easier for me to make that decision with Morgan because, you know, He's not actually asking you. He's going to have two people in sleep back and that's fine. Yeah. Leave it at that, you know. So you're going to have more trouble with Lexi, like controlling that because she wants

to be out there and so she wore and around. Yeah. But with Mason, as he got older, it was just more of a thing of okay. So I need the parent's number. Some speak to the parent and the location. Because you've got to think, I mean, older or older, a bit more older often. The location of where that you stay in and everything like that. And obviously speak with the parent.

make sure because are they because of maybe what we used to do or didn't do staying there staying there who'd be staying there

oh we're embedded on what the bass but yeah so it was I think it was more that reason I didn't think

of anything else yeah to be honest but yeah you do have to think about it but it's just just be a straight no

yeah I know I know and not feel bad no I know some parents even you know for whatever the reason

they just say no completely no sleepovers to anyone because I don't have to pick or choose of why... I'm not offending or just trying or... Exactly that. It's just no to everyone and it's easier

apart from your family. You know what I mean? But then again, I've heard most things happen within the closestness of family and friends anyway. So, you know, that's... You can overthink everything. I think you can just...

You know. But then, like you say, there are things you can do to just to make extra protection like I would never have thought growing up about sleepovers and I bet our parents never thought that's what I mean, I'm deep about it

exactly but yeah I think we're just more aware about stuff like that yeah but yeah no to sleepovers unless you know them but then yeah it's do you really know people

but so I mean it's a real funny subject it's anything you just got to go on how you feel as with that child with that person of wherever they're up. Do you know what I mean? It just depends on the situation. But yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, mine, I'm quite different with mine. Mine was so different with the fact that. I mean, I think it'll be in a few years time. I'll have to answer that again with Lexington. Yeah. Depends. Does she sleep out?

She sleeps out. Yeah. She sleeps out. But yeah, so again, yeah, no, she does. She sleeps out. To friend's house. Yeah, she slept like a few different friends to be fair. And they've slept to ours.

Yeah. of but yeah she's she has slept out at theirs as well um yeah yeah see i don't think i'll have to worry that much with case and like even a couple of friends have invited him round after school and he's like uh will you come with me or can they just come to my house and i'm like right he's such a home but i have had to say to one of them like look it's not no offense yeah but he'd be more comfortable if they wanted to come to our house. So, yeah, I don't think I'll have to worry about it.

Exactly, exactly. For me, it'll be, yeah, my next stage, you'll be Lexi. Blesser. And it's harder with girls. I know anything can happen to anyone. It's not a boy-girl thing, but I think you just naturally worry more about those kind of things with girls. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When it comes to things like that, yeah. And Lexi's like very sociable. She's very trusting, as kids should be, kids should be. As well, I know, you don't want him to be a thing. You don't want to explain too much. I don't remember ever knowing anything. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, I don't really want them knowing anything. But obviously... But then you need to explain things to the minute and I just feel like, no, because mum said so because I used to hate that growing up. Yeah, I said so. Like, you do, because I said so.

And I do find, like, with Casey, I do explain a lot. But then I over explain, I feel like I'm just going on and on and on. And I don't even know what we started talking about because I've just gone... You know, like you need to cover everything that you need to explain to someone because of that reason.

and we're like, okay, let me just start. Yeah, I think there's that balance. You don't want to, you don't have to justify while you're making a parenting decision. But I think when I explain things to Kaysen, like he takes it in more, I think the reaction's better. Like, especially if it's something that he doesn't want, when I explain to him the reasons why, and that's the decision,

then I think, yeah, I think sometimes I should. But then you go, right, that's it. Yeah, I've had enough, I've explained it. That's it. Yeah. So finding that balance. I think. Yeah, so...

I've done a sleepover party. Yeah. Sleepy pies. Yeah, so I think that's probably what he'll do. I'll pick a couple of friends. But this year she just wants to go to the trampoline place with friends. And Morgan wants to do like a football match with his mates. Yeah.

Simple. It's even better when they know what they want. Yeah. Yeah. And what about as you get older? Like, I feel like we generally just do dinners. We've done a couple big things for like big parties. So I had a party, you've done my celebration for my surprise 16th.

Yeah. And then I had a joint 21st of my brother at like a social club with friends and family. And then I don't think I've done like another apart. Apart from my 31st because of COVID and 30th and all that. I did like a little kind of thing at our friends club where we did like the naughty. So we all dressed up in like Y2K. That's not what we call it. But, yeah, we basically dressed up like we were 16 again.

Yeah. And that was fun. But that's about it. Apart from that, it's like, we should go for dinner. Yeah. So I feel like this year, 35, I want to do something. Well, I think that's why I had a masquerade for my 25th. And everyone was like, your 25th?

I was like, so why. It's not doing it. Yeah. Doing it. Yeah. Because people go, no, you join you're 21st or you're 30. You know, like a bigger thing. We did like a celebration for you 30th as well.

Yeah. I had, well, I had my 16th, I had a limo. Yeah. That was in Toriaka. We had a limo all round everywhere, didn't we? And then my 21st went to Ibiza. And then my 25th, I had the masquerade. And then my third year, you did, you did a celebration for me, didn't you?

And now, I was 85. Yeah. I feel like every couple of years, every now and then, you just try. We think, yeah, we'll do, I think it. I do enjoy it. I think we said this before. I do enjoy like the fancy dress things or the theme things

or just like a just a big celebration thing to us just get excited about and go and do it and again the memories but you know I mean when it becomes all the time and you know like imagine if we all did it through the year every year become like for me it would become a more than as much

you know you wouldn't enjoy it as much but I feel like every now and then I do enjoy as nice to market because like you say what have you done between your 30 and your 35th for your birthday I can't remember it's just a dinner and we get dressed up we go for dinner and that's it you end up remembering them once yeah i mean and yeah we generally have dinner maybe a couple drinks and we go home it's it's not like a big thing a long thing or full of actually anything that rememberable yeah so you push me for like

weeks before to say what you're doing what you're doing and before i would have planned it like lexie you're exactly well that's what happened lately isn't it like when there's not a big birthday or something that you feel like you have to do something and it's like where should we have dinner that's it so yeah I feel like this year I want to do something yeah as much as we're talking like don't go over the top with the babies you know I do think because we lose come out of that thing of actually celebrating yeah like big like you have to start making an effort when you get see that you're doing yeah like and it does every now and then you need to do it like you would have done it as a kid like with a theme and with your friends and I think something so yeah I want to do something for this year but then I feel like there's only a couple people that I'd invite so it's like it's not really really pie. Yeah. We haven't got enough friends to make a party.

We only need us. Cool. Bring your mate. You bring your mate. That's what I'm talking about. Oh. We don't need anyone else. Oh, right.

I thought he's not about to bring a friend and make more people. Bring a friend. No, no. I don't want to do. So, yeah, well, I think we should all make a bit of an effort. And yours is August, mine's November. So they are spread out a little bit summer, a bit colder, we'll do something for sure. I'm not just going to say it and just let another year go by where it's just another dinner.

Yeah, we say this though. We just make more of an effort generally, don't you? Again, not all the time, then it becomes an ag, but you do sometimes have to push yourself for us to get together and do, you know, to do stuff. Because otherwise you end up passing by and not doing stuff, you know? So it's good we have birthdays to actually do stuff. even if it's a little get-together or a... Yeah, or I was even thinking

depending how it goes and if we plan it in time maybe we do like a couple's trip or like a girl's trip or something you know. That'll be the next. Yes, that'll be the next little chat. I think we're due.

Yeah, we are sure. Yeah. But not other reason. Why it's just we're going on holiday. Yeah. Not just we're going here for that and we're just going on holiday. I know it's how better, but you know what I mean?

Yeah. Not for someone else. It's actually for Us or you or them or whoever. Yeah, because otherwise we only end up going away because it's, you know, something for somebody else, which is still fun. It's lovely and it's good because it makes you do it.

I'm saying all their memories, but it is you do you have to push yourself for you. Do you? Or because I want to. Yeah. Because I want to. That was Billy Parker. I met her once. Did you?

At Caravan Park. God, yeah. I was at Caravan Park like on a holiday with family as normal. and I think her mum and dad had a caravan in this place that we went to I must have been 8, 9, something like that and obviously she's quite popular time and a couple of singles and stuff and I was walking through the arcade

and my mum was going, Billy! And then she was there because she was trying to get my attention to tell me that she was there and she's like thinking someone shouting at her and then I ran over and I met her, oh you go, sorry. Pang to fame, hey Billy. yeah so um i've got a little uh party edition we'll round it off with the game because we do like our little game i do i like this um and it's all about birthdays so would you rather

a party or a dinner oh now i'm gonna say party this year now now about the conversation i can't sit and go oh dinner and i you know i i like i do like our dinners but that's that could be any weekend it could that's the thing i think we've got to push ourselves to be a bit more Let's have a party. Yes. Take everything that you're going to give them when they're 1, 2, 3 and give it to you when you're like 34, 5, 6. Do I mean? Yeah.

Yeah. Why not? An event space or just at home for like a party? I think now I would prefer it at home because you can just do what you want. Yeah. You know, events they're so like, you can't do this, you can't do this. And then it becomes actually not enjoyable. But then again, it depends on.

under the, how you're celebrating, do you know what I mean, of, I'd prefer a space because it'd be easier. And in England, you've got like the social club, you've got halls that used to just get out to hire. That's it, things like that. Well, here you don't really have a restaurant, isn't it? There isn't. So it becomes just so many rules and so. Yeah. You can't bring food. You can't do this. You have to pay. I'm more relaxed, whereas it doesn't become so relaxed. But then sometimes you need a space, don't you? Depending on how. Yeah. I think if you're going all that, if you, if you, if you're going all that, if you, if you're got quite a bit of a guest list

then yeah have it out yeah make a mess of the place and then leave yeah like if it's if it's just close then yeah I'm happy at home yeah no cues for the toilets no well change the music whenever you want yeah lots of people or intimate

intimate yeah intimate yeah intimate when I was younger lots of people but yeah I'm all about just I think especially because if it is a celebration it's yours yeah it becomes quite usually you haven't got that big of a group that are all one group it ends up becoming a few different you got your work friends you got your friends and you got your child friends be with everyone haven't you in a way so I think yeah realistically everyone would people relax wouldn't it yeah I'd say so um on your actual birthday or you if I just have it

on the weekend me I have to be my birthday and that's same with the kids I'm so weird about it it's Like, no, like, now, today's my birthday. Not Friday, today, okay? Even at your age now. Yeah, it's my birthday today. To be fair, whenever we normally do the dinner, like. But I think it's because I'm August, so I haven't got to really think about anything like that. Like, oh, but it's school tomorrow.

That's true. Do you get what I'm, even as a kid? Yeah. So for me, that may be why I am like that. Yeah. But even with the kids, I feel like as a kid, you have to, like, mark the day because that's the day that you're excited for and that's the day you're counted down to

so yeah as kids you have to do something on that day whether it's the actual party for the kid or whether you're just doing something like to treat them and then they have their party on the weekend I don't think for us it doesn't matter but you have to mark the day

but I think I'm sport again in mine because they're all summer so they're not in school yeah Morgan is this year I think it's last day right on the cusp it's his last day of of school

little school you know junior school what's it called in junior school primary primary junior same thing no junior yeah I'm getting confused I'm trying to think no back it's just junior school isn't it

Kaysen's now primary and then he'll go up to junior and then at sea yeah so yeah more than last of that then the last day is on his birthday and that's another thing with like going to school or not school I think if it if I

it was my birthday like now you won't catch me working on my birthday ever since the day I started work I do not work on my birthday it's my birthday i've never ever worked ever on my birthday ever and it's funny because growing up i was always allowed the day off well this is it but this is what i'm just going to say but i think i would want as a kid i probably wanted to go to school that's it like what morgan is like you want the

day off because who wants to go to school on your birthday but then it's like well it's your birthday so you want to go and be a well to be amazed anyway so like Morgan Morgan likes to go to school on his birthday or well obviously the other's a summer but if those in a summer school they'd still want to go to summer school well I was always allowed the day off and I think I took advantage of that most of the time I think I do remember some days going to school because like say it's nice present birthday um working on your birthday I've definitely worked on my birthday um but the company that I work for now they give you your birthday off oh so you get your love them you get your holiday days and then aside from that you get your birthday I love your boss that's the way forward

I'm telling you it should be because you don't have to think why am I going to waste one of my days holidays on my birthday midweek to maybe not do anything as much as I love my job I still don't want to be working on my birthday so yeah that's just luckily enough I can do that and even I think that should be made

for people do you know what I mean should be law yeah I think it should be make it law no working on your birthday we have the red days for every we're the Tom Dick and Harry so why can't I have it for St Mary and St. St. Joseph and all that you know So yeah, I'm fine

I think acknowledge the day But I'm happy to do things on the weekend But yeah I'm on the day I'm on the day And on the weekend it was well But yeah Definitely on the day

I'm just trying to read your writing Oh is it my writing Oh cake or no cake Well I don't really like cake Yeah we don't eat cake Like cake Like cake cake Yeah

Do you know I mean So really So all them years You get the cake Do you know what I mean Unless it depends what cake but usually the standard cakes are not that nice, are they? Well, I've always paid to get Kaysen a cake.

Yes, what I mean? Yeah, especially made one, more so for everybody else because me, Liam and Kaysen, don't eat it. So normally everybody else eats it, and they always say nice things, but that costs me generally 50, 60 euros, whereas I could just go to Mercadona. I've got a now freezer for a tenor. I've told me, don't ever, ever get a cake made because we don't eat it. We only want the Mercodona.

They want the Mercadena. That's all they want. There you go. So that's it. But for me, that's nice. That's what I mean. Anything like that. Just to...

Make things easy. Per stick a candle in a Kit Kat. Actually, do you know what I mean? As long as I'm going to eat it. Yeah. You know what I mean? Then I think that's, well, I like it. Yeah.

I'm cool. No cake. No cake, but something. Yeah. I still want something. Yeah. Like to say... I've always done it for a case,

but I might try to think out of the box and think, what does he enjoy as his tree and can I make some sort of cake thing? So as the... When my mind. younger they used to have and plus it was summer they got a sweet cake yeah they do that a lot yeah yeah and that's quite a good one because then everyone just picks and grabs yeah yeah that's a good idea yeah he eats some sweets um a present or an experience see a bit of both because i think as long as the present is not just to just to get something something thoughtful yeah do you know what i mean

I know, I don't know what I mean, you know exactly what I mean. Yeah. But yeah, I think an experience is a great gift, isn't it? Yeah. You know, you could, you could, and that's not a, that doesn't have to be so expensive. You know what I'm trying? Yeah, I took you for a massage. That's exactly.

So then, them kind of things, I think, is that where we're saying about when I tell the kids, got, that. That, I think they, they, they, you can change you up a thick bit with gifts. And I think. I think presents are nice when there's something you want. Yeah. And you, and someone gets you something that's thoughtful, yeah. Well, I didn't, well, you got me a perfume. You probably didn't overthink it.

But that, it just took me back. Well, no, there was thought behind it. You know what I mean? It really was. Because it wasn't one of our childhood. Yeah, so that, so someone else was, oh, she got your perfume, but it wasn't. It was, you know what I mean? It was memories.

Yeah. So, yeah. Yeah. So I think experience, but sometimes you can do a present that gives something more than just a gift. A surprise or are you the one that wants to plan it? See, Surprises are lovely, aren't they? They're so lovely.

Yeah. But. So no then. But, yeah, I think I'd prefer to plan it. Yeah, I'm a planner. Yeah, I think I'll prefer. I plan my baby showers. Yeah.

Yeah. No, I do love everything that I've had a surprise to me. I have. Um, and there's nothing wrong with it. I just think I prefer to plan it myself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I like to plan. In control. Yes, that sounds good to me. Yeah. Right, guys. Hopefully you've got some inspo for up. coming birthday celebrations and uh yeah i'll try not to go overboard this year for the first one yeah and um and we'll try to go overboard for us yeah we will we are definitely are that yeah

that's that mission yeah we're on it thank you bye guys adieu yeah yeah