The Rising’s Growing Together Podcast - Travel, Tech & Teamwork: Finding Balance in Spain & Real Life Growing Together Ep 17

Episode Date: May 24, 2025

Can We REALLY Have It All? Parenting, Work & Being PresentIn this episode of Growing Together, Billie and Charlotte catch up after a whirlwind few weeks of travel, training, parenting and real-life chaos. From team-building sessions in Spain and Portugal to finding balance between career and motherhood, they unpack the highs, the challenges, and the small moments that make it all worth it.They also dive into how technology is shaping the way we communicate with our kids, the emotional labour of staying present, and why building genuine connections at work and at home matters more than ever.

Welcome back to another episode of The Rise and Growing Together with me, Billy, and me, Charlotte. Welcome back. Hello, everyone. How are we? It's good. I'm good. Are you good? I'm great, but not going to lie.

I wonder that you were going to answer that then. I'm great, but I am flagging a little bit. Not going to lie. I am, yes. But, however. Pick your shoes. Sorry, I am just going to send my shoes off. Get it.

Carrie Buffy. That's me. Yeah. No, I'm good. I'm good. I've just come off a heavy non-stop week. So, yeah, I'm kind of like, ooh, proud as the weekend. Work-wise, obviously. Work-wise. Well, it started off, actually, with a bit of a personal trip. So me and Liam went to Barcelona or north of Barcelona. So we flew Alicante to Barcelona and got a high car.

We drove about an hour and a half, nearly two hours north of Barcelona. Wow, that's been every night. So, you're a trip, isn't it? Yeah, well, like you say, It ends up being because a friend of mine that I went to college with, her husband's got an Airbnb property up there. Oh, wow. And we met, obviously, at college in Portsmouth,

but the last couple of years she's lived in the Cayman Islands. So obviously, we don't see each other a lot. And they planned to come to, obviously, his property and when his family were visiting. So she was like, oh, do you guys want to come and try and line up and catch? So, yeah, we had it planned for about six months, which is really nice. It looked, it looked really nice. It looked, you know, like just a nice little coupley weekend stroll around the place, if you know what I mean.

Yeah, because we were actually decided, do we take the boys? Do we not take the boys? Because they were like, bring the family, don't bring family. You know, there's spades, whatever you guys want. And for a while, I was like, we'll take the boys, we'll take the boys. And then it was like, right, how are we actually going to get there? Right. Are we going to train it, which is like, I think, two, three trains.

Or are we going to fly and then hire car it or train it? or are we going to dry so then that's quite long so yeah by the time we decided I was like it's more of an ad it's more of an ad

it's not as fun for them it was yeah in the end I'm so glad we didn't I know that we would have probably adjusted what we did there and our boys had been there but it was really nice to do what we ended up doing

and obviously we just done that big holiday figure all together so it was nice for me to have a couple of nights and we had for three nights as well I nearly done two but I was like do know what we'll do three we'll get there

in the evening after work on Thursday and then we'll have all of Friday all of Saturday and then we knew that we were coming back quite early and we didn't really have the Sunday. So yeah it was really, really nice. Really like it's quite Frenchy up there, you know, because it's really close

to the border. Oh yeah. So it's I'm going to put it, Catalam, I think where it was quite French-Spanish. So all the words on all the signposts have like funny symbols on you know, like Frenchy. They don't speak the same Spanish that we speak. Wow. So, yeah, like you go to a restaurant. Some people understand you're no problem,

but some people don't. It's like, I'm in Spain, but I don't know what I don't get. And I've never heard of this place. A few people I've spoke to have like, oh, I've heard of that place. It's lovely. But it was really authentic, like, Mediterranean. It looked. Yeah, we were like on a bit of like the sign of a mountain. His house was like on a cliff. The views were like done in. Yeah, just like across the whole mountain live like down to the beach and then we drove and we were in like a little proper Spanishy little town by the port and like all cobble streets up hills and it was really like he'd been just walking around I still need to just look at little shops and like I got a little necklace and I um funny enough the next day she was like because it's really hard to shop

in the caven islands she's like we have to fly to like Miami to go like clothes shopping oh wow they do some stuff on the island but not everything so um She was like, there's this little shop, and last time I come, I bought the whole shop. I really want to go before. So we ended up, we went for a massive hike, like a two, three hour hike and lunch and stuff. So we like that, yeah, it was great. We never really get to do that proper up. Yeah, tread up in the side of the mountain thing.

And we went for like a nice big luncheon back. So it's really good. Then we're like, right, we need to crack on before the shop's closed. Yeah. So we rushed down, literally 15 minutes before the shop closed. We found it. They stay open for us. It was like this tiny little boutique place.

but we did we bought and it's funny I picked up a pair of trousers I picked up the top she went they're the exact same clothes that I bought the last time but like a different shade of trousers and a different shade top of the same so yeah we bought like sandals trousers top and it was funny because I had three things that I bought

and she kept looking and as she kept looking I kept looking and then I was like oh um just buy that again so I think we have like three different bills because I just kept as in things on and I like that's like I just need to not check out yet Like, because I was like, just add this. I'd be like with a dress, a jacket, sandals, trousers on the top.

It was great. I know. Really nice. Yeah. Really, really nice. Not only getting that much stuff in one shop nowadays. No, not even if I go to like the high street shop. So, it's a little boutique one. And I would have blinked to more straight past a shop.

Yeah. I would have looked and thought there's nothing in that shop for me. I love that though. Obviously, they're not the locals, but they know the local area with her property there. So having someone who's knowledgeable of somewhere like that. Yeah. I know it's just a shop, but still, it's nice. And do you know what I mean?

Like the height, doing the height. Exactly. Yeah, we got, took to like, yeah, really nice restaurants and it was just easy, you know, yeah, we just kind of rocked on and stuff. But no, it was really, really nice, really nice to catch up with them and get to know her husband more because we've not really had the opportunity to get to know well. So, yeah, it was a really nice kind of little foursome holiday. So that was planned well in advance.

Yes. And it was Liam's mom's birthday just before we left. her 60th so it was like right just before we lead it's a big family there yeah so we did that the two before go in and then um with work it was coming up to the time when we get um the Spain team together and and do like an in-person team training for like one to two days um so about a month ago we we chose those dates because we only had a couple of dates available for when people aren't on holiday and stuff so it came up once so they was like right I'm in Barcelona to come back on the Sunday, then the following Thursday, I've got Spain team training. And then I was

speaking to one of the guys from London that was coming over. And he was like, right, well, I need to go to Portugal to see the Portugal team. I think you should come to Portugal, and then I'll come from Portugal straight to Spain. So we'll do Portugal and Spain back to back. So I was like, okay. And then I was like, hold on the minute. Well, at the time, I was like, oh, yeah, sounds good. And then I was like, right, So I'm going Thursday to Sunday. I'll get back from, literally flying into the airport on Sunday, go back on Monday to get another flight out to Portugal for two nights, come straight back.

I got home about 7 o'clock in the evening. Edited slides, finalised things, went to bed at like 11, 12 o'clock. Then I was up and going to the Spain team training for a whole day. Then the evening meal that we have. Then the following day we did team activity, which was really fun and lunch. Which is all right. Well, you know, you've got stuff coming. But at the same time, you know what I mean?

You know, if you've got to do it and do it together. Obviously, today, you know, that it's like, right. Now we're done. It's done and I smash you out. Yeah. You know you've got it's coming. You know, you've got to smash it out. But obviously, usually I wouldn't have done a personal trick right before.

Yeah. Now, that was nice because, like, you recharge a little bit. And I wouldn't necessarily have chosen two intense training sessions back to back, especially traveling. It's just the way everything unfold in, which. all worked out and it was really great and Portugal, first time, I've been to Portugal. Yeah. I've never been to Portugal before. And they're so close. It's actually not that easy to fly. So luckily,

most of our teams in the Algarv, but we have recently acquired another company into the business and they have a corporate office in Lisbon. So we made the Albaugh guys drive to Lisbon and I flew into Lisbon. Because that was easier. Because you can fly to it. But if they just say go to the Albao, I can't fight to the Albao. I would have had to have to drove, either drove there, or horse drove to an airport faraway. So that worked out.

But that was lovely. That's a cool vibe city. Really nice. Yeah. And the team there, had you met before? Yeah. Obviously, you met most of the teams. Some of them are online.

Yeah. So the corporate guys aren't really in my division anyway. So it was nice to meet them. And then the Portugal team, there's four of them. The regional manager for Portugal actually came from my old company, but I think we may or may not have crossed. I don't think we did. But he's been with us for probably about a year and a bit.

So I've met him at one of our other team trainings. But I had never met his team who I've been training online. It's weird, didn't it? Yeah. So I actually got to meet the three of them in person. Which is nice. Which is nice because you get a completely different vibe from someone when you actually meet them and you get talking to them.

So that was really nice. And like I say, we had a whole day team. team training, went out for a lovely evening meal. I tried lots of Portuguese things, which is always nice. I'm quite open to try things, but I'm rubbish at ordering. So I was like, right, guys, what shall I order? Help me. Yeah.

So that was really nice in that. And then the next day, we had obviously a few drinks in the evening, a few wines. I don't really drink wine. So I woke up with a headache, not hungover because I didn't have loads. Maybe just that feeling of having wine. Feeling of dehydrating, knowing that I drank a bit. And then obviously we had training that morning before heading to the airport. Morning.

Morning. Yeah. But, no, that was really good. And then, yeah, straight into Spain team training, which was another full day. But that was 21 of us. Wow. And there was a lot of us there. So a full day team training, which I ran the whole day's sessions.

And obviously, I know that has to be called our hotels, with reservations, booked a dinner. It's not just telling me. Luckily, someone helps me with Portugal. But Spain, I had to organise that where are we going to have, lunch, where we're going to have dinner, where we're going to have much the next day. And the teen activity, which is always really difficult because I've got a complete variety in ages, of abilities of interest.

Yes, I can imagine. And it's like the pressures I believe. I believe the friends who are not more relaxed like how to say. Exactly. It would be hard for us to pick a girl's thing activity to do. So to pick one for work. And it's like, I want everyone to enjoy. I want everyone to have fun.

So, yeah, the pressure was a bit like leading up to these things. It was like loads of nervous energy. But, no, it ended up being so much fun. I found this company that I think they go all over Spain. So you can use them to like corporate dues or even like friends, Hindu, stagdos, whatever it is. So the woman actually flew down from Barcelona with all the equipment. So you basically have, you break up into teams.

You have an iPad and you get a box of stuff. so there's like questions which you answer so all different topics yeah and that gives you money okay um or you can do these exercises in this box which is like sudoku word search those kind of things to get to get money then when you with money you pay for a challenge and the challenge gets you points and the people the most points win so like we're doing all this thing getting the money then it's like right book a challenge right we did a tic-top challenge or what's thinking of Lexi. I had to do this like dance movie with the gas

is out to fall down and then we had to sing a Christmas carol for 20 seconds and dance to a video or we had to make like a jumping frog origami out of paper with like the instructions and stuff. Yeah so my team lost

which I'm... You me, ma'am out. You me, I know. I am not a good loser. I was gutted. But we didn't strategize, Mary Ann. But next time, that was actually really fun activity because we've done a couple of escape rooms in the past.

Yeah. And, you know, escape rooms are okay. But the trouble with that is like, if you don't know or if you can't figure out the next step, you can't really progress. Yeah. It's like everyone starts stressing. Then some people give up and then you have to rely on other people.

But this was like, right, we could all be doing stuff that they had together differently at the same time. And it's like, right, can't do that one, fuck that. Let's move on to the next one. try and like do things. Yeah, yeah, make a plan of how to get caught. And then I was like, right, I can stack cups in 15 seconds, video me. I was like, next one.

So it was like it was really, really fun. Like something I think we would all enjoy as well. But at the same time like you say, every age, you know, interest, whatever can get involved and have fun unless you really are. Unless you're boring. Yeah, unless you're boring. But no, we actually had a really good bunch of people and everyone said they really, really enjoy. So, yeah, like I say, at the end of the day, at the end of the week, it's like, pressure's off, everyone had good time.

Everyone learned a lot as well, which is the main thing we do these things for. But no, that is like, now I'm... Yeah, and it's not only done, like I say, it's not done. You've also, you feel it was good and you've heard off others that they felt it was which is a win-win because this is your work and this is what... What you care about. And I see, the role's still quite new to me. and one activity that I did, which I didn't know if it would be really choosy or not,

but I was like, Spain team are all over Spain, you know, we've got lots of different teams. We don't always come together a lot. So the whole emphasis for the training was let's learn how to be better at our jobs, but also let's really like connect with each other. Yeah. So I was like, I didn't know how this was going to go, but I was like, right, let's do compliment a colleague exercise at the very end of the day. And then Nishdale was like just going to do a couple of.

compliment for someone but then I knew some people would get some some people wouldn't yeah that's not really fair so you have to compliment the person to the right of you yeah so everybody had a compliment yeah um and if you wanted to write an additional one for someone you can yeah so I did it and I made everyone read out their own compliment yeah which was good so everyone like got to not only read it themselves but share with a group that's nice there was some really nice ones and there were some funny ones as well like oh love your suit looking fly kind of thing or whatever. But it's nice that your team can be like that between each other.

I think it's so important that if you haven't got them good dynamics and bond or connection, I'm not saying you have to be best, best, best, mate. No. You know what I mean? Just to get, like you said, to get to know each other, it helps. It's your everyday thing, isn't it? You know, yeah. And especially in a sales environment.

Now, in some companies, like you're all working together, you're supporting each other for the good of the company, so it's easier to get love. Sales teams can be quite difficult because, because there's targets, there's pressure, there's things that overlap with each other. People can rubble each other up the wrong way. Those kind of things happen in sales.

It's just natural and especially a company the size of ours. But it's nice to kind of bring that together and realize that everyone is good people. Like even if something's pissed you off, there's a way to just deal with it or move on from it. Or if you found that maybe you've put them in that position and everyone in the team in that position, that if they don't feel, they can approach and say something.

Exactly. Do you know what I mean? I think the worst thing comes is when people stop talking and they talk about things to other people and then things get worse or it gets more negative. Whereas if you were just to come straight up and be like, look, this is really annoyed me. Can we just squash it and figure it out?

And it makes it better. And I think bringing everyone together really helps that, doing fun activity together. And, you know, a lot of the, even the training and the knowledge was like, right, so you're really good at the. this this is something that you want to work on you now know people in the room that you can reach out to it's not just me it's not just your manager there's no a whole room for the people that are really good at what they do so share and and work out but yeah the the compliment one was nice

because i actually was a little bit out of it because obviously i'm presenting yeah yeah yeah so i kind of got missed in the compliment the person to your right yeah yeah but then one lady clocked and was like i'm going to do one for you she's like i love your hair um and then uh thank you so thank you And then another guy wrote one for me as well, and he said, you're very knowledgeable and you are absolutely the right person to take this team and the company to the next. I was like, oh, that's really mad. I would have literally been like, yes, like that's. Yeah.

Because everyone, how do you feel like that? Yeah. That's how I want to see. A bit of reassuring, well, a bit of nice feedback. And obviously, you know, I asked people, how did you find it? Did you enjoy it? And everyone's going to say it in my face. Yeah, that was great.

Yeah, I really liked it. Yeah, great. It's like, what do they really think? And no one's really going to have said that, probably, that comment to my face, even if they were thinking it, because there's not something to be a bit... You're the right person to take the... Yeah, be a bit free time.

Yeah, it's just not something that comes out naturally in a conversation. So, no, that touched me. I was happy with that. So how did you find, obviously, what, is it a week? Is it a week from home, in a way? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I think I've stayed at home two nights out of the entire week. Yeah, which is quite a lot when we used to be in a, not being a home, should be say,

but I suppose we are, aren't we? We've worked, well, I say again, we're not lucky and we are lucky, but we've worked hard to be put in the positions that we are, that we can be more present at home and choose and pick, you know, these things in a way. Yeah, other than. So obviously, when it comes to these times when, you know, you've just got to do the grind a little bit more for that big time. Like sometimes I've got to extend my diary, you know, and work in all hours.

It is what it is. Nothing else, you know. But I know that me personally, sometimes, there's nothing wrong with them. They're absolutely fine. It's just sometimes I feel like, oh, like, I'm not going to be able to have to have lunch with them. Yeah. So, they're fine. I had lunch with them 300 days this year.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And sometimes they don't even care or sometimes, don't you say they might make a little comment like at what time you work into today and I'll maybe say just a little bit a few hours later than I normally would they could just go oh they don't really mean anything by it they're just because they used to that I'm home I've got this morning oh yeah so casein's so easy going yeah loves being at home and like I said he's really not bothered um you know if I'm going away it's like cool I'm with nanny whatever yeah he's off that's a surprise yeah exactly well he never said a comment like this before so I was a bit like oh but um obviously

he was with my mom for three nights and we were in Barcelona and then obviously I come home for one night and I went straight to Portugal and then Liam's been with them the whole time like Portugal and even though I was at home for the last two nights with Spain

I mean I was up and out even at the hotel setting things up from half eight in the morning and then I come home I got changed and then I went back out for the team dinner so I literally haven't really even seen them in the evenings

and had given that time that they used to or you're used to Exactly. Usually when you've... When you finished work, of course. But you knew that this wasn't switching off yet. This wasn't a week that I could do that. And like you say, you know, if you overthink it, it can make you feel bad.

But they dropped me to the hotel where we were hosting everything on his way to school the last two morning. So he dropped me yesterday, no problem. And then we went this morning. And we were literally just pulling up. And he was like, why are you working so much? I haven't seen you. I don't get to spend any time with you. I was like,

oh, you just stab me in the heart. I would have to go out into that ball. You know, like that, I did. I actually got a lump in my throat. And I said, I went, it's Friday. I went, I'll be done when you finish school and we can spend the whole weekend together. I mean, like they go without.

Like he bought him from school, mom can I play play play play play soon. Yeah, exactly. In that moment. It's like stab me in the heart. You can get you put your job forever kind of thing. Like, that's it. I'm never doing it again.

I'm never working again. I'm never being away from you. They don't need to you get that feeling, thank you. Oh, that's surprised. Yeah, it shocked me. I think that's probably where it come from. And I was like, that was like, yeah, like, gutting.

But like you say, you know, we're fortunate that I'm loving the work that I'm doing that I have the four-day week now, like I say, because I grinded for 50 years to get to this point. But also... He's still passionate about being successful. And that doesn't mean that because we're where we are. as me that we stop i still want to be on new courses and learning new different ways and stuff the way that you still want to bring in different ways of getting your team now or training

them in different ways yeah you know coaching them in how to be better at their job or better people or you know or you know taking on the task of whatever they've got in the company do you know what i mean so you know just because we have got to where we've got let's just say that's for i'm not at the top no we're not or we're not where we want to believe yeah even if you are you're you've never really stop in a way. But I think it's just the balance of sometimes, yeah, we're going to have to not do where, you know. Yeah.

Well, like you saying, we're very happy with where we're at. It's not like I'm really striving to the next thing like I was maybe like five, 10 years ago. Yeah. I'm very happy with it now. But yeah, like there's still loads of things that I want to do. There's still more like opportunities, even within this role, like what I want to do. By all means, I mean, there's, yeah, just loving.

In any, definitely just the beginning. Yeah, I think with us, I'm always going to want to grow. Yeah, at times, you know, and for the kids, for me, it's for the kids to understand that sometimes I have to go away and do this work. Yeah. You know, or be there longer or whatever, whatever, or be out of the, you know, to go sit in my room for an hour or just to organize different stuff because that's what you have to do.

You know what I mean? And I have started to stay to case, and I've got a photo app. I want to buy money. But then I actually corrected myself because I was like, that's important, like he knows that, but I enjoy my work. Yeah, it's for me. And I've never really heard people say that.

It's like, oh, mommy's got to work for money. Yeah, it's like a track. It's like an exchange, you know, got to work to get money. And it's like, that's not the only reason that you should work. So I caught myself in that and like, it's for money. We can't do all these things and live where we live and all the, you know, if we didn't work.

But it's also about like having something that you enjoy doing. Exactly. And what, you know, and there's this Lego thing at the moment he wants to buy because Leon's auntie recently visited and gave him a bit of money. But it's half the amount that he needs. Then normally I only just ordered it for him. Yeah. And it is what it is.

But I was like, you've only got half the money. You need to figure out a way to get the other half. And I said, look, we don't give him pocket money at the moment. We've not only got to that point. But I did see a guy that said, I don't give my kids pocket money because that makes them kind of think like an employee. I do this, I get paid this, which there's nothing wrong with that.

But he said the way in which he's doing it slightly differently, which he thinks is better for their development, is here's a list of things that bring value to me as a parent into our household. There's a list of value and things that that equals money-wise. Do as many as it as you want? Yeah. So it's like, do you want the money?

Go and do all those things. Yeah. If you don't, or you just want to do the one or two to get your money, then that's what you choose to do. Because you're then thinking about the value that I bring is what I'm worth. Not the time I put in is what I'm worth. So now I said that to him, I was like, look, go do some chores and then you can get it. And then he's like, yeah, but I should do my Bitcoin.

Mom, I'm rich. I've got Bitcoin. Just do the Bitcoin. I was like, no. I said, you can't. I said, that's the easy way. You went, why can't I do it the easy way? like, God, I'm digging a hole for myself, like, trying to think, like, here's a great time to do some real parenting.

He's got the best example of it, you know, but like a standard book child, you know, like, that he's definitely, yeah, he's quite smart. And I'm like, right, I need to answer that, you know, like, when you watch things, you're like, that's a great parenting lesson. Yeah, like, I'm trying to think of the good, and I was like, peason, sometimes you have to do things the hard way, and you're going to be so much proud of yourself once you've earn it and you've worked hard for it, you're going to enjoy it so much more.

And he was like, OK. I do that sometimes. You know, what I over-explain, should I say. I sometimes start explaining something, you know, or whatever. And then I'm like, oh, but what about this been? Then there's this been? And, you know, like, over-

I mean, you've gained something. And then I'll be even confuse. And I'm just like, oh, my God, I'll just read. I shouldn't just show out about it. I'm trying to pair and not confuse myself. Yeah, because you try and think and be the alternative and cover every explanation. they have questions right especially like your kids age casein's age like you explain something to me that it's yeah but what about that

yeah and what if this happens and what about it as it's like you have to have answers for all of it well I think because I just go on so much by the end of it and then I'll just shut up now so you're boring together they don't even know what the first thing they're said I don't even know the fact thing they've said but then later on they'd probably come back to me you know but they've obviously thought out yeah and then they'd come back and probably question me I think that's the most thing the best thing for them is like yeah get thinking and I found but then I started it all off again my explanation of going from this to me even with the team training like I was like

these are things that can help you know perform better do better you know some habits you know whatever but then I found myself saying a little of the time you know this is to help you start thinking about things yeah you know like start analyzing what it is that you're doing and then you can see areas that you can improve like and it's all about thinking and reflecting rather than just always doing doing doing so I think parents is like that sometimes as well and coaching and there's difference I think between managers and leaders and like having a good coach and a leader is that like managers just say this is what you need to do go and do this so you're just like creating like little robots and there's no kind of thought and care behind it

It's just you're a number, you're a person, you're going to deliver for me. But the difference with, like, amazing coaches and leaders is that you give the person the confidence to think that they, and help guide them for them to come to the realization of, right, how do you think it's the best way forward to achieve that? No, I've got to do this. Yeah, but, or this is the way you should do it.

I want to do this and how are going to do it the best way possible in a way. But managers just tell you this is the way to do it. it, go and do it. Which you've got that feeling of, yeah, it's hard to show you a lady and really cares. Yeah, it's a tabalic and, you know, but coaches are like, they get you to think, they ask you questions, you come up with, right, I think the best way is if I did this, then maybe that, okay, do you think that's the best way forward or is there, you know, it's like you get them to think for themselves, then it gives them the confidence and they've come up with the answers.

So that boosts their confidence anyway. and if someone, you know, if you're part of a collection and you all come together with a decision, you're all going to be much more likely to do it because you've been part of that process. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. If you just get told, go do that, well, no, that's not the way I would do it. And nobody cares about that. So, you know, you're not as invested. No, like you saying, rather than it be like a to-do list, it becomes more of like a, like a, like a, not a challenge,

but, you know, like a self, in the end, a self-achievement as well as, you know, your own, you know, you're in time or from the grapity or whatever, whatever, you know. And then it snowballs because you've challenged yourself, you feel good about it. You feel confident because, you know, my coach, I've come up with the solution and my coach believes in me. And then, yeah, I either achieve it or because I've tried, you know, on that step further. And then you get more confidence and it just snowballs and heads up from there. And I think the more I've got into coaching and learning about coaching and my qualifications are coaching, It's so well aligned of parenting.

It's scary. And like I'm starting to actually try and use that in parenting as well because it's almost like being a coach and a leader to a little person. Yeah. Like we have to teach them like the, you know, values and morals and lessons. But getting them to like think for themselves. Which I think we've lost over the years. Yeah.

Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I feel like we've lost. Yeah. Okay. Back in the day it was completely like opposite. I know that we just hit. You know what I mean?

Or, no, what I mean is like, you kind of, as a year's, I mean, before us, like you kind of, you'd be left to do stuff. So you'd then learn better that way, you know what I mean? But then it went to me. You got no support, but you figured it out. Yeah, it came to the opposite of that of literally you've got grown men having their asswives still with their parents. Like, let, you know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's literally from that to that. Everyone knows one of them. Yeah. You know, and I think, I'm right, going that far back, maybe not. But like you say, getting them to actually think for themselves, being more of Manchester 2.4 years. You know, because of, again, the days of change and stuff.

But as well, I think you can see, personally, I think you can see the effects of that. Do you know what I mean? Well, a great example. Morgan's gone away this week. Yeah. That was a bit of a thing for me. Do you know what I mean?

Well, I think that would make me a bit unwilling to me. Yeah, but this is us now. Do you know what I'm saying? I think back in the day, it wouldn't have been a thing because we're just so... Okay. We're exposed to too much info. Yeah, yeah, probably. But at the same time, obviously, we have that...

Every child's got a phone these days, do you know what I mean? Especially their age and upwards. Yeah, yeah. So that communication, that immediate communication is always there, first of all. So as a parent's side, that at first really concerned me. I was just like, oh, I don't know, but it was a rule that there wasn't,

but nobody was allowed to take phones. The teachers were making like a canal on, you know, on an app to be able to send us. So there was communications were in the teachers, but they didn't want any kids. no phone, basically. Oh, okay. And then, like I say, initially, I was freaking.

Because, again, Morgan's not the kind of kid who's on his phone that much anyway. He's got a good balance. Or, you know, export, whatever that is. You still want to be able to contact your time, when they? Jeff is on every morning. He's about three hours away. Yes, as far. I think it's quite far.

So, I don't even get out of my town. I was thinking, I heard my child, Ben. And at the same time, he's probably, the most likely out of three of them to not want to stay out anywhere. Yeah, he's quite more of the home boy. Yeah, he normally has to his friends go to yours. Exactly.

So in being out, or if he does ever go out, we always usually would get a hold at whatever time. Pick him up, which is fine. But then it comes to things like this. And they want to do it. Yeah, of course they do. And then it's their away and they change their mind.

So in a thing of that, at least if he's got a phone, if he ever did get that feeling, I knew or a right. Do you know what I mean? Or just be made. For you. But anyway, so there wasn't allowed to tell you.

As I said, initially it freaked me out. But as obviously the first day went on, I've literally had a realisation that how good is the fact that, I don't know, let's say 100 kids, I don't know how many kids there are, has gone on a trip for three days or whatever, especially these times. Yeah.

And nobody has a phone. I just love that. Yeah. The fact that they're literally just going to be kids. Yeah, because you would have thought they would have maybe said, right, phones in your bags. No one can have them out when we're like, And our kids would be on them all night.

But no. I honestly, I just, I mean, he's not hoping. So I could have bad at him or someone. But I know he, I know, but we did school trips like that. And you are like, you're up talking all night. And we know how it was. I feel like they don't get to it. They don't know any different.

Exactly. And because unless the situations, and I know I'll see on news, the English news, lately that somewhere, Wales or Scotland or somewhere. I saw that. Right. Yeah. So here it is. Here it's a law.

They have to lock it in a bag, don't you? Well, here in Spain, it's actually a law now. It made a law more than a year ago that it's a law that you are not allowed to take your phone. It's not in schools. It's not so much, no. Because the school you're talking about, I've seen pictures where they have to put it in like a lock bag.

Yeah, well, not like, this is reek out the way. Exactly. Yes, physically, like you can't bow on it, you can't sneak it. I know that when Mason was at his last school, when he's before he um one of the classes he had to go into and they all had to put a phone in a box which i like that idea i mean i was quite for it there was some parents and would just be like me but i'll just think if they're in school they shouldn't need them they shouldn't have them get them out like as soon as they finish because yeah for safety for going home if they're

walking well that was only i reason because in that way it's didn't have if you're in school you shouldn't you shouldn't have to have it and i think back to when we was at school and we started to get phones. I remember being distracted quite a bit. Now back then we had no internet on our phones. We were texting, which meant we were paying for those texts. We had to have credit which wasn't always... We had to think about

do I. Yeah, exactly. And, you know, we didn't always have credit. One, these internet things with like WhatsApp themselves. So even then phones were distracted because you're texting each other in part. So imagine how distracting it is now. Yeah. Because like you say, it's just so accessible and

yeah, you know, free and whatever. I mean, it's just going to happen. So that, that side of it, I love. I love, love, love to the fact that they have had. I can't wait to see him. I can't like to hear everything. And just, yeah, just literally reminded me I went on and again. Mine was a PGL thing.

And it was literally very similar, multi-adventure place. You know, you make up songs on the bus on the way. And you know what I mean? It's so many memories. It's like, and I took a disposable camera. Yeah, disposable camera. And obviously, you know, I'm like, I've all got them in a scrapbook from that. And I said to more than I might take him on him.

He was like, you know, the camera, do you but a whine? He didn't have a clue. He didn't have a click on it. A disposal camera. Yeah, and I thought he's not going to matter. Most kids probably haven't even seen a camera. Which I wish now. Because they have them in their own.

That I'd. You've done it. It was only because literally the day of the thing, not it was a thing of, I don't know, the teachers scared them out of it or suddenly. But all of them were like, no, we're not taking our phone. They're not allowed. Which is good because that's respect for the teachers and the rules. Completely love that.

I thought one of them might slip their bone in, do you know what I mean? But it doesn't seem they have. But yeah, I do wish I'd give him that Polaroid, not Polaroid, that's disposable now. Because it would have been just brilliant. Just that process of going. Especially in that age, yeah.

Where they, again, they don't really give a prize. You can't check it back. I can't do another one. I'll filter it. Mitch said what he likes about it and no one can look around taking pictures or videos or, you know, what they're like being in the moment. Yeah.

And I think, you know, there's so many things I see now, like kids, especially Morgan's age and a bit older, like actually dying from doing stupid TikTok challenges. So it's like messing around, you know, I don't know where they are, but yeah, like, oh, jump off that, oh, video, yeah, if you finally do, do it, do it, do it, and then you egg each other on or whatever. Like, yeah, that would worry me. So it's nice that they don't have that because they're in the moment. I have, because phones have pissed me off lately anyway, not just, not that, that's just an example of.

You sent me a big, next week I want to talk about phones on the podcast. I have to tell you because this, obviously, I didn't even, this coming out about Morgan, that was just another experience for me, off of the moment of conversation. But it was that just recently, this isn't even in children, okay? This isn't children.

Right. And I'm not even going to say it's a generation thing because sometimes it's not even a generation thing. Yeah. Isn't more percentage, yeah, that sometimes it's not. It's just, yeah. Fucking rude. And it, it's, I just feel like,

do you really need to pick your phone up by I'm talking to you like hello like that for me is like a one-on-one conversation but just so desperate to and I get sometimes you you might be in a conversation with someone or whatever and for whatever reason especially over here if you wait for a bloody appointment for something you know you've got to think of over again you're because if you know you're like a concert hall or I don't know whatever whatever I can understand but genuinely when people just have a note of case. of bloody Snapchat or something and they have to literally pick their phone up

to see it. It really drives me and say, sorry, this is actually another thing. It's not a rant about people being rude but that is one thing that just made in. So the one thing I want to say to people is just be more attentive to actually life, okay, rather than go. Try and do what Morgan did and put it up.

Be aware of three days. I'm telling you off if you've got to get it out. Was, oh, what was I going to say? I know. I always do this, no. Oh, bloody hell, I'm going to lose it. I don't know. This is happening to me a lot these last two weeks. I mean, mid-conversation. Yeah, mid-conversation.

It's fair. Which isn't very helpful in the middle of a presentation. Oh, no. I would, that would be like, oh. It's happened to me two or three times. And I don't know, like this week, obviously, I've been super busy. So, yeah, I'm a bit more tired, brain fog, maybe. But, yeah, I think, I am mid, mid-point. and I've lost more train of thought.

Yeah. I think sometimes I think ahead of something too much and then I've already lost what I'm going to say. That will have to come back. Oh, that's what I said you at like two in the morning. I know. That's what I was going to say. But no, you're right.

That drives me mad as well. Like if I'm in the middle of a conversation, especially if it's one on one and someone picks up their phone because it beeps. Like, fair enough, if you, like, if your phone's ringing, glance over, oh, it's not important enough on the bag. Yeah. Oh, excuse me, do you mind?

like it's this or whatever, then fair enough. But I literally talking, like, mid-com talking. Talking, talking, obviously, even if it's not allowed, it's obviously gone off in the pocket or something. And then say you're talking, talking, talking. Yeah. Can you imagine? Seriously, if I had all right, sorry, yeah.

It's just... At least address that person. Like, one, you shouldn't check if you're mid-conversation, having a good conversation. But if you do, because you've checked, like, it's ringing or buzz, oh, sorry, I'm just waiting for this. So I'm waiting for that. It's not like...

I mean, between mates is annoying enough, but between mates, it's a little bit... Oh, sorry, do I mean? But I just think... At work. Yeah, I just... Or wherever. You know what I mean?

People in the chair you're talking about. Yeah, I've had occasions, literally, when I've had patients... I'm in the mouth. But no mind, I don't really need to come out of the mouth that much. And if you... So you hear people the odd little quick break. Yeah, just a brief.

Yeah, not like 15 minutes to come to row. No, no, I'm literally just a second. Just swallow or breathe or whatever. or they're going to mop you out. Yeah. And it's literally like a... But not for like... Just a scroll.

It is literally like just a notification off like for a Snapchat or a... Yeah. I don't know. Something like that. Yeah, WhatsApp. You know what I mean? But... I mean, I find it hard as well at work.

Like if I'm having like a one-to-one meeting with someone, which is, you know, important. And their phone rings and they're like, yeah, they're looking at an email or that... And now I know it's work-related. So I know. that they're not just scrolling and ignoring me like super rudely but it's like the world isn't going to stop these people will you'll get back to them like in 20 minutes in half an hour well this is it so you know you're going to be able to to my time and your time together's pressure so let's respect that together you can't deal with that now

and you know you can't do exactly just just like you say if it's just to look and then right that's that kind of yeah well if you're phone key three need you just to check it isn't the soul wrong my head out oh sorry I did only just check that it's not important right what we're saying exactly but when you don't even address the person you're talking to and you're like just look down they even realize it i don't even think i think they would think it's a rude thing but they don't know that they're doing it i honestly do yeah that's true the benefit of the jail i am yeah i am i honestly am yeah and i know that i do it sometimes not not really to people um not really tight friends and stuff maybe to like leum like if we're

set on the sofa or whatever or like to have do find myself doing a lot to casin yeah because if he's busy or like if he's on the playstation for example but he's talking to me because he wants to show me yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and then I'm like what I'm looking at isn't actually that important okay but that's different so I should yeah I've caught myself a couple of times and I'm like or if he comes to talk to me rather than just look up what I started to do is actually just let so he can see me eye contact and put the phone away yeah you're important and you've got my attention yeah yeah yeah and left for me obviously yours is different because i i you've got your your your specs you can take for that kind of thing but if sometimes i just need to do something

on my phone for work then i then for me just because i don't want to be doing it there all night they go just wait a minute because i'm just doing this and i'll be with you yeah you know like i've started to do that as well yet life is important like if i'm in the middle of booking something or I need to respond to like my mum who's I see something you know whatever yeah just for them just stand I will but if I'm literally scrubbing

then I'm like right now put that down or yeah give you a minute I need to do this first I always go give me a sec okay Smith one second oh oh he's not doing it like it comes across cheeky no I'm like you said one second and I'm like you know that one second

doesn't meet one second yeah he's sort of right he is too literal he's just pointing out I get that. That drives me driving that as well. And I'm like I say, I'm the one doing it as well. So I'm starting to catch myself. Yeah, maybe I'd get enough. I know that when I'm my phone. I would never pick it up and like, I ignore you. I would at least go, oh, I just need to go back to someone. I know that I don't do that. But like so when it's more casual, he's like, mom, watch this.

Mom, watch that. If he was like, mom, I'd do this or something about school or work, then I would stop. but yeah when it is about showing me this thing on the PlayStation for the fifth time and nobody you're like

yeah obviously that is different but no even that deserves it just about so desperate it's only because obviously it happened

so I think it just happened you know yeah yeah exactly that and it just made me think God do you really need to be

that present on your phone and again I'll get people work I'll get people I get all of that don't get me wrong but yeah

just it was like a bit of like a bad on a bit of a addiction or a habit or I don't know whatever yeah and again that's I've said some probably is actually to again I don't know me but if these people but I think if they was explained to these things in a way why I'd actually pointed it out you know I didn't point it out excuse me I'm still talking to you yeah yeah that they would have actually felt

that rude but again I genuinely don't think that some people no I think some people are just rude some people are rude yeah definitely but I think you're right I think there's we're so used to it now, but there's a lot of times that we don't even realise we're doing this thing. Well, there was this documentary, I don't know what it's called, but where they took, I'm sure it was a programme, where they took phones off kids or two weeks or three weeks in a secondary school. All right. And I haven't watched it, but I would love for them to do that.

Just for a week or two and the adults, just to see. Yeah, I think I've heard something like that and they did say that it really boosted everything up. Yeah, just to see, because three days is nice for them. But obviously, they say, isn't it, like, it's three weeks to kick a habit. Yeah, 21 days to form a habit. But I have heard people where they say that their kids are on it too much and they've actually started to take it away.

It's only the first couple of days that they ask for it because it's a habit. And then they said that they're actually shocked at how quickly they do forget about it because they just get into something else. But, no, one thing that comes to mind is that I've, I've seen and heard and it, yeah, it's one of those things that kind of sticks with you is you have to pay attention to the little things that they want to tell you because if you don't listen to the little thing, they're that I want to tell you the big things.

And then it's like, oh, and it is because to him, that's big for him. I don't care about PlayStation and stuff, but that's something he loves at the moment. So it's like you have to show them that you're interested so that he continues to keep telling me kids. And like you say, at some point, he isn't going to come to me and want to talk to me about those things. No, which is why I know sometimes, I know what I'm like. I know this house office is very tech.

Do you get what I'm trying to say? I'm not so much. And I know I can be a little bit negative about it, especially to my little, maybe, very into it kind of thing. Yeah, yeah. But at the same time, I think it's what I'm trying to say is technology is great if you use it for the right things, you know, like them kind of. That's how I

feel about it. But I think most people don't use it for the right things. You get what I'm just, you know, like in the pairing mode, this is again, you're trying to explain. playing everything, you know, like that people don't use it with intent. It's just habits and it's laziness, like, I just scroll. And we all do it. Same.

I'm not really, I don't know. I think it's just, it's natural. I see. I do. But I think you just need to be a bit more intentional with how you spend your time, how long you're in front of it. Every now I'm just putting it down, you know, speaking to the people in the room, you know, those kind of things.

Or, you know, I'm only going to go on it for the first hour after work and then I'm putting it away. Because some people, as I'm saying, it's their work, it's everything. So any, do you know what I mean? Even if you, you still, in fact, you never switch off, do you in a way? So I do get that. I do get that. But at the same time, you know.

You need to have your own boundaries because otherwise that phone will suck you in. That's just my opinion and that's just my experience over this week. So you see, you've had a phone, don't shout on me in a week. You said people are in time. You said, you do, when you pick it up on the top, you may. Oh, no. Wow, but it was literally, you know, just things popping your heads. Like, obviously, with work, I'd had them through experiences,

and then obviously more than with that, and it all was to do with phone. And I was just like, and then up that thing on the telly as well, or the news or whatever, I've seen it. And, yeah, I just thought, yeah, I'd just rather mention it because literally that's how I felt, how I feel. Yeah, I think that's good. Keep it in mind, don't abuse it. Yeah, spend time as a people, but, you know, use it for good stuff as well.

And if you're going to use it, use it to watch us. Yeah. Watch our episodes, like and subscribe. You watch and listen or just listen. Exactly, yeah. Your visuals or your audio people, whatever you like to catch us and keep up with us. Then, yeah. We just continue.

We've had a couple of extra subscribers. Yes. Which is nice. And, yeah, like I say, continue to message us, comment, feed us your questions. We'll bring them up. And, yeah. Yeah, experiences. Yeah.

Like work and phones. Yeah, let us know. Or share your questions about what you want to know and we can answer them next week. Yeah, we will. Honestly. Exactly. Exactly.

Anyway, have a night weekend.