The Rising’s Growing Together Podcast - When a Small Mistake Breaks You… and Makes You

Episode Date: November 18, 2025

As the seasons change, A raw and honest episode where the girls open up about the small mistakes, emotional spirals and unexpected breakthroughs that shaped their week.Winter brings a shift in mood, energy and priorities, and in this episode of Growing Together, the girls get real about the moments that hit harder than expected. From event planning stress to navigating babysitting and celebrating family milestones, they explore the chaos and beauty of this season.The girls share parenting moments that triggered emotional reactions, the guilt that comes with forgetting things and the way overthinking can turn small mistakes into overwhelming spirals. They also talk about failures that led to surprising positive changes and the generational patterns they are consciously working to break.Balancing ambition with the need for peace becomes a central theme, along with the importance of traditions and creating memorable moments with the people they love. The episode ends in a nostalgic reflection on the moments they wish they could relive all over again.Let's talk staying warm and embracing the season. ☕

Hi guys, welcome back to another episode of the pod. We are here. The pod pod pod. It feels like proper winter pod again. I know we are. I feel it's just literally gone a bit dark and grey. Well, we are recording an evening today. Yeah, it feels a bit wintry.

So it's like I can't go out like. No. Like I do in the day. It's coming up to, I think maybe this weekend's going to be my change over. I get all my winter stuff out of the underneath of my bed. I put all my summer stuff away. Yeah.

I grabbed all Liam's stuff yesterday because he was, I've got one jumper. I was like, you don't have one jumper, you have one jumper out. The rest is still under the bed. So I got all of his stuff out, all his like pajamas and dressing gown and stuff. Because I keep mine out because I've been using my dressing gown. I keep mine out. Well, I didn't have a dressing gown. Oh, yeah, you had to replace it.

Yeah. Mitch brought me one after our first of been. Oh, nice. Yeah, I've got a new dressing gown. But it's in that middle bit. It's still like you put it on and I'm like hot. I've had this jumper on. enough at least three times today.

Yeah, so it was just went a bit grey and that's like, because I was coming out, felt even weird driving in the dark and it sounds weird. Yeah, I've done a few Pilates classes in the evening. Yeah. I was doing like a Friday morning. Yeah, yeah, but I've done a couple in the evening now and I'm like, it is, it's weird. It's dark isn't me?

Because even in summer, it's not dark, it's all 10, is it? No. It's just, yeah, yeah. So we are in changeover. We've had a fab week. I've had a busy week. We had our second event. Yeah, we did.

Second the rising event. It was so good. God, it's mad. We've been speaking about doing an event for months. Yeah. And now we've done two. We've done two. It was great again.

A great group of ladies. Yeah. Initially we had a bit of a... A bit of a... Yeah, when we got there. So we had a lovely area the last time we did it. It was... We had all of ones...

Well, we got there actually the first time. I was like, where are we going to set up? This just doesn't feel right to be where we thought we were going to be. where we thought we were going to be. Yeah, we didn't feel it right. So, yeah, we moved. We moved. We took a whole kind of one area of this, of this venue, which ended up being perfect.

So in our head, when we booked it with the venue for the second time, we just assumed we're going to be in the same place. The owner told me I'm not going to be there, but obviously we'll tell people to expect us, had it booked pretty soon after the first event. So we actually had a couple of weeks notice this time. And, yeah, got there. And the whole side of where we were, we were. fill up with tables and people eating.

Yeah, we just got there. I was like, uh, okay. And we, last time we got there, I think, an hour and a half early. This time we only got there about an hour early. So it was like, what are we going to do? What we're going to do? We didn't have no sort of. The guys, one guy came over that was quite helpful and was like, okay.

And in the end, we ended up taking the inside of the other side of the venue. Which turned out better. But like you say, I think in a way, it changes that, um, the dynamic, I suppose, of what we had in the first event, although it was different, it was still just as good. You know, it worked for what we had with the weather and the people. It was quite windy that day. And the area, you know, so it was still very secluded and just us,

which is nice and needed in that sort of event that we did. Yeah, yeah. Like you say, we're getting deep into stuff and people are being vulnerable and sharing in and you don't want to do that across a massive restaurant. Yeah, I just think you can have a nice private area. Yeah, with yourself and others and, you know, use tips and tricks that we're doing, especially in that event. Yeah.

Yeah, it was needed. But it was great, a lot of fun again, meeting new people. So, yeah, brilliant. And we went out afterwards. We had a nice meal after, a little couple's meal to celebrate. And, yeah, my sister babysat. Yeah. my younger sister baby sat for the first time properly on her own

with both boys and she even put him to bed she did and we was even obviously we didn't really have a plan because of the youngest one like teething and yeah he didn't have the best week I'm not sure how it's going to go so it was like right let's not actually make a plan plan yeah let's just kind of try and go with it but at least try to get kind of a celebration thing after because we can and then go home um but it was it was kind of She smashed it, so I've already booked her in for my birthday. I'm like, yeah, you can come back. Brilliant, brilliant.

And she had him for a long time. She had them from, obviously, us to get to the venue beforehand. Yeah. Throughout the whole venue for the event. And then we went out afterwards. And she had him from about, I think, 2 o'clock till about 10. I think it's nice knowing, you know, you've got someone who you can just relax having your kids. Does that make sense?

I definitely wasn't relaxed at the start. I'm not going to lie. No, but I know, you know, now you can, you know. Yeah, it is. Not that you had any worries about it, but it's actually just the proofs in the thing, isn't it? Well, like I said, it's her first time having both boys. Hayden is a harmful.

He's a toddler and he had a tough weak teet in, so he's not been in the best moods. So I did think like, oh, we might nip back, put him to bed enough to go back out or whatever it was. But no, like I say, she smashed it. She said he was really well behaved and turned to bed. And she's willing to do it again. So it's not just the fact of the boys.

She's put herself forward again. She will actually do it again. I think it makes a huge difference, like you say, having people that you can relax knowing that they're okay, people that are happy to actually babysit that you don't feel like you're really asking a proper favour. It makes all the difference for how you enjoy yourself when you're out. I agree. Because otherwise, if you know that they're like, oh, they're doing it but they're not really happy to, then you're rushing. If you're not that confident that they are good with them or the kids aren't comfortable with them, then again, you're rushing. So it makes all the

different so yeah well done Sean yeah I'll see you again next week yeah I love it you may regret it so what about you what have you been up to so my week um it was my dad's birthday big 75 wow I know um and my mom had organized him a big surprise party where they live with all his friends and everyone so how was we when we did the other surprise birthday I don't know. 75, he might have been... That might have been a 60th maybe. Maybe, yeah.

Yeah, it must have been. Yeah, I think so. Mad, isn't it? Yeah. We can say it like that, that's mad, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah, so we just always like a little pie, don't we? Yeah.

So, yeah, so my mum had organised a big surprise party. So that was really nice for him and just, you know, to see all his friends and, you know, whatever. Lovely night. But I had an experience before that. Oh, dear. So, do share. An awful one. Like, I, so Morgan has football on, on that day usually.

But because of, obviously, my dad's party, or the fact that it was his just birthday anyway, he wasn't going. But I had known this anyway, obviously, because it's the same day every year, my dad's birthday. And it was one of those things I've thought, and sorry, I'm kind of half explaining it. And we take Morgan's friend. with us. We drop them to football and basically his mom drops off. So it's just, you know, share the drive. Yeah. So we, we drop, we drop them there to the football and then she drops them back. And, um, so all week I'd been meaning to tell the mom that Morgan wasn't going to football. But for whatever reason, and I'm not going to make an excuse because honestly

there's no excuse. You blanked out. I'm going to make, I'm going to just say why it probably didn't happen because I feel like I have to. Um, probably because most of the time I probably couldn't get into my WhatsApp because my memory is so far. I can never really get into it. Um, or that I didn't really have my phone on me. Because if I ever go to do something, I'm like, oh, that's the time.

One of those things like, oh, when I have a minute, when I get my phone, I'll do it. Yeah. Or yeah, or whatever. You know what? My phone's not great anyway. So I'm not great on my phone. But I had to thought about it. But again, it's no excuse.

And, um, yeah. So we just carried on with the evening, got ready. just about to leave and then my I had it in my hand really enough because I don't really obviously have it and I had it in my phone because we were walking out and it just vibrated but obviously because I can't get into my WhatsApp it didn't ring and I couldn't get into it

and then Mitch's phone rang and he said oh it's so-and-so's mum the boy's mum and I was like it hit you you realise it hit me I haven't told her that poor boy is sitting at home in his football kit waiting to me picks up to take into football training And I was just like, I literally just start crying.

I just started literally first out crying. So Mitch obviously explained obviously what had happened kind of thing. The mom was more worried that Samin had happened to us. Yeah, because you didn't tell her and you didn't turn out. Because obviously you haven't said anything and no one had picked him up. She was like, it's fine. You know, no worries as long as you're okay. But the whole way then I'd got in the car.

I was on the way. You know, it was traffic. So it took a bit longer. and I was just, my eyes were just watering and streaming and the kids were just quiet in the car just like obviously knowing how bad I felt and Morgan just kept going to me, it's okay, it's okay and I was like, I know, but it's not, it's not.

Oh, like literally it just stuck with me for so long. Then I got to, then I got to, bear in mind I didn't speak to the mum, Mitch spoke to the mum. So I've got outside my dad's house and I was like, I need to talk myself out, but I need to speak to the mum because I just feel awful, you know, and so I tried ringing her and she didn't answer so then I've just made this big thing up

that in my head that she's oh my god she doesn't want to talk to me she's mad at me so then I've gone into my dad's house you know trying to be all happy birthday kind of thing and you got that like hitting your stomach yeah but she did obviously call me back and was like oh I just wasn't next to my phone I'm really sorry as long as you're okay everything's fine with my son obviously I just wanted to check you was okay but yeah it was that awful, awful feeling and I was just, I've never probably experienced anything like that because I'm not, you know, usually I'm quite good at that sort of thing as well and I was just like, oh my God, that is awful. I couldn't believe I forgot something like that. That poor child,

da-da-da-da, you know, you know, and I'm, yeah, just as anyone ever experienced anything like that before because that was, it's not even that bad. That's the thing. It's not even really that bad. It's not like I left him like in the middle of, like never got picked up or something that would have been worse like if you forgot to pick him up he was with a family member everything was safe and fine you know it was just oh this kid wanted to go football and that wasn't there to take him sort of thing you know what I mean um but yeah just fully accidental and I know if it was the other way around I wouldn't have been angry or anything like that it would have been exactly say are you okay he's fine don't worry

whatever yeah yeah but that feeling because I didn't allow yourself because I was the one who made that awful mistake it was just like oh Oh, my God. Like I say, it wasn't an awful mistake. It was a mistake. It's terrible. Horrible. So that happened to me this week and it was a bit of a, oh, again, it was fine.

But at the time for that, it was more that 10, 20 seconds of that, oh, that realization of, oh my God. Yeah. You know that. When your stomach actually falls out your ass. I feel like I'm probably crying now. It literally is that. It was literally that.

And then my eyes just couldn't stop then. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so I just... When you say that I'm like, you really don't need to feel that bad. But I know for a fact that in those situations, I'm massively overthinking. I massively overplay it in my head and I would make myself feel bad. That's what I mean.

If it was my child that hadn't been, I wouldn't have been, I would have been exactly the same reaction. But obviously, because I was the one who didn't do it, I was just like, that is awful. I think we definitely need to get better at that because I think we're both quite bad for that. And I think there's been times where, like, yeah, I'm talking you out. of like not feeling bad. Or you're saying, don't feel bad for something. Yes, you know. And we are very bad at that.

I think it's because I'll either go one or the other. I'll be like that, like something about this. Or I'll be a complete bitch. You know, like I'm like one or the other. It's like there's no in between. There's no in between. It's just like you'll either think of me as, oh my God, she's horrible. Or, oh, yeah, she's so lovely.

She's just anything. She's so over the top. You know what I mean? So that happened to me that week And again, it wasn't a big thing But it definitely happened to me And it wasn't a nice feeling And I thought

I hate that Has that ever happened to anybody else? That is the worst feeling Is that pit in your stomach? Yeah And it takes even when you're then Eventually over it Because like you've got to be at someone's birthday

So you've got to get over it It's really hard to get rid of that feeling That's not in your stomach It's so hard to clear it Sometimes like if that Those things happen to me And like an hour's past And I have told myself

It's fine like I'm over it, don't feel bad anymore. It's so hard to get rid of that feeling in your stomach. Sometimes you have to just sleep off. It's like it's, I think it's probably the forgetting, isn't it? It's that forgetting thing, feet that, what you say. But I, yeah, it's a bit like when you've been proper crying and you just, you either feel great after, you feel really tired and just like, like, yeah, drained.

Yeah, yeah. That happens all the time. That even happened to me last week as well. I had, um, my grandparents are selling a house here and my dad had told me a couple of weeks before like, oh, they need, you know, your help with the money side of things. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no worries. So message them. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a week or two later. Um, so you need to message it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'll message them. So then I did message them. But it was in the evening. Um, so I was like, oh, I'll pass your details on. Expect to call tomorrow. Oh, can they

call me after this time? Yeah, no worries. Didn't pass the details on Because it was the next step I mean I should have just sent the email that night I do that's what I do I think of hours And then I don't do it And then it's even work

I do it all the time To send it out of hours Yeah and especially with my birthday I've booked in like my eyebrows My hair my teeth And I'm like Oh I needed to change the times And I'm like

I've gone to do it two three times Late in the evening Because it's when I remember And then I'm like No I don't want to get a late message Because like Liam will get late messages From clients and stuff

So I'm like No I'll wait in the morning And then you forget So I forgot to send the details over. They messaged me like a day and a half later. No, I'm not heard anything from your company. So then I was like, it's not my company. It's totally me.

I completely forgot. Sorry, I'll send it now. And then even when I said that, I still forgot to do it until the next day. So it took about two, three days for them to get contacted. But even worse than that, I'd book tickets to go to Tobiaka on Sunday for Moana on stage. I'd seen it, I'd booked tickets, I don't even know how much I paid for it, maybe 40, 50 quid for all of us to go. I remember you messaging.

Yeah, I think I messaged and was like, oh yeah, and it was like a Sunday, which isn't ideal, but whatever. But with, I actually forgot to ask for next to you on. There you go, didn't even ask her. So anyway, I'd put these tickets and I'd put notification, because everything I put on my phone, I'd put a notification for like the day before, an hour before. Same. Two notifications.

Oh, you had the notifications on? I don't know. what happened because I do not remember seeing these notifications but I don't know if I'd normally I always do like at least the day before and like that day but a couple of hours before I think I'd maybe done a week before because I'd booked it so far in advance and then a day before but not on the day. And the day before was our event. So obviously I must have got the last notification while we're at the event. Liam had my phone probably deleted it or whatever. So yeah all the focus on the event, I was putting

Cason to bed Sunday night, sat there and I went, Sunday the night, I'm sure we had something to say, I went into my phone, I was like, fuck, how annoying. I forgot the bloody event, the bloody show. Yeah, that's brilliant. And it's so annoying as well, because my mum was looking at things for us to do for Christmas

while we're in England, and she mentioned about a show and she was like, oh, should we get a Hayden ticket as well, or should some of us take Cason? And I was like, Don't worry. I've got a show. So I'll see how he is. And if he sits through it because it's like maybe he's getting to the thing where he can pay attention, I'll let you know. Everything based around this show.

Now I can't let her know. You didn't even go to. I love that. I love that. It's brilliant. So, yeah, mentioning about forgetting things twice this week after I've got things like that. Yeah. And I did like, when I got that, that was it. I was in a lawyer meeting because I had to go try and sort out my illegal immigrant son who doesn't have his residency yet.

I had an appointment with the lawyer and it was my grandparents called me in the morning and I got the so I couldn't answer the phone because I was with the lawyer but then the feeling oh I forgot to send the details so the exact same thing

exactly and obviously my company's about to help them move a lot of money so I was like it's not the company don't judge us it's me and if it was anyone else

you probably would have done it maybe straight away I don't know Maybe, maybe not. Maybe not. But yeah, it's that, oh, it is, that realization. Yeah. Yeah.

So I've had that feeling this week. Yeah, I don't want to. I'm really, after that, I'm really trying to, you know, like, oh, trying to be better. Well, Liam's told you you need a new phone plenty of times. So maybe you put it on your wish list from Santa. That's shit. Cool.

So that's what we've been up to. So I've got a few questions. So, yeah. I'll just get your opinion on a couple of things. So, question time. Question time. What is a failure that turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to you? A failure.

Something that in the moment you were like, oh, I feel so crap that that didn't work out the way I wanted. But in the end, actually being something really good. Oh. Anything come to mind? No, what about you? I've got one. Yeah, yeah, that's quite, yeah, go on. So straight out of uni,

I applied for loads of graduate jobs. So there's a lot of companies and big companies in England that do graduate schemes for like fresh out of university. You've got your degree. You can come into like a program. So I applied for loads of different like managerial ones where like we'll take you fresh from uni but we'll put you through a program

and you can work your way up to be in a manager in big companies. So I think which one did I get? I think it was I applied for loads of different ones. It was either Liddle or Audi. I think it was Liddle. We're doing one at the time. And I thought like, oh, little. But the management scheme was actually rated really well.

And I thought, well, if it's experience, it's experienced. And I could take it on and do something. So it was a real grueling, like, process. So I had to go on lot. Well, first of I had to send off my CV. Yeah. So like I say, worked since I was young. So I had like a working CV.

And I worked all through college and university. So it was CV qualifications. I sent that off. Right. okay now you get picked up you get sent an online assessment so I had to answer like a hundred questions I don't I don't really remember what the questions were like I think it was more like personality thing so it's like no real right answer and I think like you just had to I think some of it were multiple choice some of it I might have had to write an answer so it's like proper

long assessment I think it took me like two three hours to sit this assessment and once you enter it you can't come out of it so you can't like take answers Google things that we didn't have we didn't have AI back then. So, like, once you're in it, you have to kind of finish it. So I did that. And, well, I think part of it is to wean out people that give up halfway through. So I did that, got through to the next stage. The next stage was a group interview in an assessment centre in London.

I actually, I went and stayed at Sharns, actually. I stayed at hers the night before because it was quite early and it was in, like, London. So, and I borrowed a suit from Tony because I, I didn't have like proper work clothes. I was like, borrowed a suit, stayed a chance, right, ready for this assessment day. My God, it's got me. Never done anything like that before. So I didn't really know what to expect.

So I was in a room, I think there was like 20 of us. And there's like, I think we were there for like six hours. So you go and you do like different things and like you're in a room. People talk through like a bit more about the job and they ask questions and it's to see how you perform in a group and who sticks, puts their self. forward to answer questions and so they're like they're evaluating you all day I think there's someone stood but there's also people like watching you so they're really like watching how you the big little house yeah I know I was like wow this is like intense yeah I was like I'm not

auditioning for like Porsche or BMW or someone it's like it's little but no like it was proper I think actually they had I think they even said it maybe 2,000 people applied oh wow so then we got down to like the final like I think there was maybe even 50 of us 30 to 50 of us then at the end of the day we then went into like a smaller room and then then it was whether you made it to the final stage so it was a callback so obviously I did that bit then I got called back to the final three or five people where you have three interview people ask you questions and fully interview you so that was quite intimidating and intense. It's how you imagine it, isn't it?

Yeah, in a way, like an interview. And it felt like a proper boardroom, you know, where like they're trying to trip. It wasn't a nice interview. It was, I'm trying to trip you up. I'm asking you. So if you come in as a manager and there's someone that's worked there for 20 years and they're in their 50s and they're not listening to you,

how are you going to react? Yeah, it was proper, like, situational, really hard questions. So I did well, but there was one guy who was being really like hard and tough on because he was like, oh, I can see you're engaged. How would your husband feel about, or future husband feel about relocating from Portsmouth to London? And they're actually, I didn't realize this until after when I started speaking to people. They shouldn't, they're not allowed to ask you personal questions like that.

Yeah. It should be all work related and skill based and it's got nothing to do with them. Yeah. So anyway, did that, got obviously like down to the final couple and then I didn't get it. And I was like, oh, like I've got every interview I've ever gone for. they said no they said no even the job that I had at the time I've got like a summer job through uni she I did the interview and she went oh we've got about three or four other people to see so we'll probably make a decision in the next couple of days in two hours she called me

you got the job I was like well okay yeah yeah yeah I felt quite confident like I'm good at interviews I'm good at this kind of stuff and I didn't get it and I was like I felt really shit then like oh I can't believe we didn't get it but because I didn't get it meaning Liam ended up deciding to come back to Spain. Yeah. So we could have ended up moving to London. We could have ended up maybe not even staying together and I would have had a whole completely different life.

So that's something that in the moment I felt really shit that I like judged myself for not getting it. But I'm totally glad that I didn't get it. Oh, I can't think now, to be fair. That was a good story. I like that story. I might think of saying after. We'll come back.

That's a good story. Yeah. That came to mind actually. Yeah. When that question came up. what's a generational pattern you're consciously trying to break or keep oh generational pattern pattern pattern like like what like well one that comes to mind for me like a funny one was one that I tried to break was not having a baby at 18 because my nan had my mom at 18 my mom

had me at 18 so when I got to like 19 I was like yes I done it I broke it. Yeah. So that's like a funny one. I think... I used to joke around that with Mason, to be fair. Did you? Yeah.

Getting him past that stage. Yes. It needs to go way past the stage. Way, way past the stage. Yeah. He's past it. He's broke that. I think one thing that I want to keep is...

I think we're all pretty good at, like, thoughtful, like, gifts and a bit of like getting together and like memories and holidays and things that's definitely something i want to try and keep up with like traditions you know like getting your christmas pajamas the day before you know all those kind of yeah i think to be honest i think i do a lot in my daily life you are very um you've got a lot of things that you and your family do yeah like it sounds like a lot like to me i feel like i don't do sometimes i doubt myself that i even do any of those things but then I'm like, no, that's what I mean. You do a lot. Well, I think that's why

I can't think of them because they are just generally my just day-to-day thing. So anything, well, a lot of what I do is just from how we've been bought up and I just love that. So I try. I know the world's different, but you try to incorporate

and that. I mean, camping's a good one. I grew up going camping every summer and that was such a, I just such good memories for me. And I remember the first going here thinking, oh it's not the same yeah you know i mean but now it's the most amazing place it's close enough to that feeling yeah it's it's the it's the basic of what it what camping brings that's the base is that it's it's it's the no quality time yeah that kind of thing but in the general scheme

of things i think yeah day to day i try and that like you say togetherness the i'm sitting at the table having dinner together yeah we've always done that as well it slips a lot with hobbies and your kids getting older. Sometimes Mason's not even home from work or college before Lex is in bed. You know what I mean? So sometimes... Can't be every day.

No, it changes from them being little and they're always together to everyone's in and out but you've just got to try and make that effort to make sure you're always, you know, at least once or twice a week that you can and get together. You know what I mean?

Rather than just fall on the excuses, we're all busy, like, oh, we just can't do that anymore. Yeah. That's quite a big one for me. and I notice it when we're not doing it. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like I just feel like everyone's so apart.

Yeah. Because it's that one time of the day, we all just sit together at the table. Well, I even noticed that recently with Kaysen, I feel like I don't have as close. I'm probably way over thinking it. Yeah. As close of a relationship with him now.

I'm a bit sad. One, because my hands are full with the baby. So I'm not as doing as many things with him as what I used to. But it's also his age where like he's less interested, in talking to me and just wants to be playing his switch or whatever so I feel like what we've done actually the last couple of days um is I've got my I've put the baby to bed and I've got Pinterest on my phone and interesting because sometimes I feel like I don't even know what to talk you about yeah so actually I I Pinterest interesting questions to ask

your kids yeah so I sat down and I was like case it so we've done like some funny ones and we've done some deep ones but we did it one night I was like right I don't know what to say to write that now I've got some prompts. So I basically pod interviewed him like this and he said he really enjoyed it. So then the next day I was like, oh do you want to do questions again? He was like yeah and then Lee was like you need to have a bath

so he was like okay and I went do you want me to ask you questions in the bath and he went yeah normally I've got to the stage where I don't even go in there with him anymore. It brings you of that time. It doesn't have to be like you like something Finding extra time.

Actually no just sitting in the bathroom with him and asking him questions. Like you're so connecting and just doing something. This, that's, and I think because we do that every day and I'm not, we're just used to it now, maybe it's, do you know what I mean? But yeah, there are things every day, every day they finish school. How was your dad? You have a good, like them conversation.

Yeah. You know, not that I need to, but obviously just reminding Mason here and there where his age and obviously he works a lot. He's studying for his car. Yeah. You know, he's 18. Yeah. You know, he's got a lot going on.

But just to remind him, not that he needs it, but just you've got your brother and sister that look up to you, adore you, and I'm lucky for that. He's not like, oh, he's gone and I don't want him around. It's, we miss you. You know, that sort of thing. No, that is really nice, actually. I think that's probably why because we have that.

It's very easy for teenagers to be selfish. And kids in general, like psychologists say it. Like, kids think. they're at the centre of the world. Like, and it's not a bad, it's not a bad trait, but it's actually just the way kids are. They, like, if the parents are fighting, it's my fault. Like, it's just a natural thing of kids think everything's about them.

And as teenagers, this is even more so, like, about me and my friends and stuff. So, like, I mean, I've been with you once and we would, at McDonald's with the kids, and Mason was nearby and he specifically came in with his friends just to come and talk to us and I was like wow yeah yeah at the time he was 17 like what 17 year or does that I would have avoided yeah but but I think that's I think that's what I love you know what I mean because you are very close yeah very close and I'm not saying that I'm not with my mom and dad at all because I am but not as close it's different as I've you know I've consciously made you've consciously wanted it and because you've consciously done it it's even deeper yeah it's worked yeah it's

definitely worked and we're all yeah we all we all love being around him each other you know like that's probably what's nice yeah and i do miss um when when you know one of them's not there yeah and we all notice it yeah or all that i notice more that the dinner thing of you know of we all sit at the table and eat but when we're not all there together it's different it just changes things but it does as they get older and like you say you've got different things going on yeah it you just have to make that more of an effort that's what's probably yeah yeah yeah definitely like my mom's always put so much effort into our like holidays when we go away and it's always full of like activities

and stuff so I feel like and like Christmas you know make it really good and all the stuff and yeah I feel like that's something that I definitely want to keep and when it all comes down to it the base of that is being together yeah like quality time you know what I mean obviously all the fun and the activities are all that great you know brilliant thing in between and all this magical time as well at Christmas or whatever, Easter. You know, all these things that, you know, we do these things for. But when it comes down to it, these are the times. The core memories.

They're the holidays, aren't they? So it's the time when you're off, you're together. Yeah. You know what I mean? Or whatever it is. And I think that's the base and that's what my children love. I think I've said it a million times before. Their favorite time was COVID.

Yeah. That was it. Their favorite of a time. It was mine, actually. I know it wasn't a nice experience for some. But again, the base of that was that we just. just had that quality time of being together. So, yeah, I think I'd just try and do as much as I can

in the daily thing of them sort of. Yeah. Sort of things, yeah. Yeah, definitely. Do you ever feel torn between ambition and peace? You answer that first. Peace. Yeah, so I think, I mean, we've had this conversation before.

I think we both struggle with that. because we both want to continually strive for the next thing and want to grow and feel like we're progressing in life, personally, professionally, all of it. But then at the same time, it's not being hard on yourself. And I feel like I've got better at this since I've had kids. I feel like my ambition outweighed my peace of mind before I had kids. I definitely stressed more than I needed to push hard.

rather than I needed to, like work-wise more than anything. I don't think I really considered my personal life. I mean, lucky Liam came along for the ride because I didn't really put any much thought, maybe because we had quite a strong foundation anyway and he's very easy going. But yeah, I definitely outweighed focusing on professional life. The priorities change, don't they?

Yeah. It's the thing. It's literally that. Different season of life. It does. But I've never known any different. Yes, true. Yeah.

Really? So for me, I haven't. had that kind of change in a way that's true you get what i mean of that yeah that knowing the difference yeah um but at the same time i was trying i think i do it with one as well it's knowing that what it's worth yeah you know you know so is it worth that or actually i'm gonna just yeah you know and i think even when you do have kids and you like your ambitions don't stop but you can maybe pause them you can maybe like I'm still aiming for that but it's just going to take me maybe a bit longer um so it's hard to not go what I found was hard to

not go as full force for the things that I wanted when I'm trying to like do it all well I feel like I'm in that moment now because I feel like I am I'm not but I feel like I'm semi-retired really compared to what people most people are working at this time because they're saving and they're you know that kind of thing of you know to get to that age of having that you know what I mean that's the norm isn't it you work 20s and 30s generally for that kind of grind isn't I'm not I'm using that time to be with my children because I feel like and this isn't a judge by this is just just works for me yeah to try and be with them as much as I can because just of experience and how I feel, when they get to a certain age, they don't need me present so much

or even probably want me as they do now. So, and then when they don't, I will still be, hopefully, healthy for enough to still then pursue more of what I want to do in terms of my hygiene side. because I've done a great. I'm great. You know what I mean? I've achieved loads and I'm so proud of that. And if I just stop there, then why, that's great. And you've got the life that you want. That's perfect. Yeah. But I don't know if it's just because of who we are or, you know, because I've just got, like you say, so many ideas. And, you know, you feel like you've got the ideas. But, well, I'm not. There's no, just wait. Because there's no, because there's no, because I think that takes a lot of strength to be in a position where you,

you could do more hours. Yep. You could do more ideas. Yeah. You know, you've done the hard thing of studying and getting to a point where you've got to. But like you say, you're very, you've set the boundaries of how much you're willing to work right now and how much time you're willing to put into that bucket and how much personal life, like what you want in that bucket.

And it takes a lot of strength to be okay with that in today's world of where we just want more or more and more and more and more. I don't know if it's because I've experienced it. So because I've done the studying and heard the children, it sounds horrible, like Mitch taking the children out, obviously, but they're hearing the children leave me because I was at home studying. I needed quiet. So Mitch would take them out, you know, give me, try and give me that time.

And I'd just feel so upset like I was missing out and I wasn't there. And I wanted to know the part with you. Yeah. But I'm here and I've got a study sort of thing. But it excites me. But it still do work like that and still feel like that. Yeah. So, and I got through it.

Because at that time, that's how I had to do it. Yeah. I had to do it, you know? But now I don't feel like I have to do it. Because that was worth it for you right then. But I had to get to that point of where I wanted it. Do you know what I mean? So it was either right, I either just stay as I am.

Yeah. You know what I mean? And do this or I'm going to have to sacrifice that. Yeah. And I didn't enjoy it, but I did it. Yeah. So now I'm more of a, right, I don't really have to at the moment. Yeah.

I'm happy where I am and I love where I'm because all of that excites me so much. There's so much more I want to, you know, with just little bits and bobs. But I also know that feeling if I did do that, that would also take that away, that time away, the reason why I'm not. Yeah. And then I wouldn't enjoy it. Yeah. And I, and that's not the point of why I've got to because I love my job and I enjoy every minute of being, I'd be there all day if I could, in a way, because I just love it. It's not like, oh, I want to get out. Yeah. I just love being there. Which is really hard because to say that you love it and there's more earning potential were there if you were to do more hours, which you could then argue could be more for your

family, but what you've realised and what you're sticking to is your time and presence is more important than, well, they say presence is more important than presents. Yeah. And I think if you really sat with that and thought about that, everyone would agree that that's true. And you hear so many stories just through life of, oh, you know, the kids who grew up with the parent who was never there because they were working and missed all their, you know, their hobbies and their games and they don't really have a close relationship, but they had the money, but the kids didn't want the money.

They wanted the parents. Like, it's obvious that that is the case, but it's so, so hard to not fall into the trap of, sometimes even feel like you need to earn more money. Well, I think my experience of what I went through with that, what I did with my previous work that, you know, that I did manage to, I could step back and do it and that I'm in a position that luckily, you know, I've, I've, yeah, I can do that. Yeah. But, yeah, so I'd say I'm probably in it now in a way, but I'm fine with that, actually.

It doesn't, I'm, I'm excited for when it comes, you know, I mean, I've even spoke about doing, I don't know, is it a midwifery? That's what you'd call it, yeah. I'd love to do that. Yeah. I've even counted the years. So if I could start this year, at least then if I could do it if Lexi was by, you know,

like, literally in my head. Yeah. It was just... That's amazing. You'd be great at that. And again, it doesn't scare me to... My mum and sister have both said that they've considered that and they would love to do that.

I'd love... I'd really would. So again, that's something that I would also be ambitious to start, you know, because I love it. But yeah, right now it's that. I'm probably in the middle of it. yeah definitely well yeah because like you say you've done that the kids are getting old now I think they're still a little bit on the younger side but they're definitely approaching

they are they're approaching getting into the it's all about my friends and my hobbies yeah I'm just trying to hold on to them yeah and I don't really it sounds bad but I don't actually want to hang out of you and it sounds horrible and I'm going to be heartbroken when I get to that point but when I think back to like me at that age it's like your interest and your priorities do shift. I get it, I do. And I'm lucky mine are like me. You've hung on long.

Mine like us. We're all right. But it's true. I actually saw something the other day and it was like giving my kids the childhood so that they still want to hang out of me when they're adults. Yeah. And not trying to heal from their childhood away from me. Well, I'd love that.

You know, like, oh, we're going away. Oh, it's that. Oh, we're going away. Oh, are we? No, we're going away. You're staying at home sort of thing. You know, like with Mason joking around, that he wants to come with us rather than go, yes, I've got a free house.

Yeah. You know, that mentality and it's so lovely. That is really nice. That's definitely what I want to have with my boys. Yeah. Last one. If you could retire, oh no, not retire, sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, if you could relive one day of your life exactly as it was, us to feel it again what would it be live one day relive one day exactly as it was not to change it but to just have that feeling again oh my god I'd do so many I would do so many do we take giving birth a off the table no not giving fucking birth I wouldn't no but like that feeling of like me yeah the first time yeah I wasn't even thinking that okay that's good then because that's what most people would go to yeah yeah no I was I just think pain things like that I think of like you know just like a Christmas like when maybe I was with my aunt and granddad or yeah you know

like when you were younger and you just like I'd love to know that level of excitement look on look on so I wouldn't I wouldn't like to be me again because I was I wouldn't know so I'd just be taking advantage to the situation no but to go back and relive it oh okay yeah but like yeah yeah so that so that you can take it in as you are now something like that with with me as a child and my mom and dad and my nana-granddad You know as my family now are in a way looking at me

and I know you've got obviously you're old recorded but you know actually it is a normal day-to-day thing really you know just I think and that's a random thing I think that's what I'd like to do

what to do so no specific day comes to mind no specific Christmas no because they're all one of those kind of Christmas I could go on obviously a day with this but I think you know just more intriguing of the whole just my family life yeah you know what I mean I think I think so yeah

yeah yeah that's a nice one yeah um it's hard because I I naturally go back to getting married yeah um because again it's a big day it goes by too fast uh I loved my day like it went fine there was no problems uh well one or two problems that you knew of at the time yeah yeah that you find out a little bit more about afterwards but um yeah no a couple things but not enough that it you know bothered me at all like i i did love and really enjoying my day to the point that like i think we said it i was super relaxed in the morning like i think everyone expected me to be like running around like a headless chicken and being stressed and trying to organise everyone and everything and i just

wasn't no even when they were like you're laying you were like i know i'm not actually late because i told everyone else a different time um yeah i'm actually i built in this half an hour buffer okay um i know what people are like um so you're gonna tell me i'm late i thoroughly enjoyed every bit of it but it it just always goes by too fast um and yeah yeah i think i would do that that probably comes to mind yeah like your day yeah and just yeah take in more yeah i remember saying things like that they reminds me i think i've said this before as well bernard's watch i used to watch program i've i said it do you know what i want about yeah i love bernard's watch and the queen's nose with the 50s so you just stop it i just loved it i really wish i had that

watch yeah i don't know what i'd do because everyone's frozen you'd be on your own wouldn't you this was my thing now as an adult thinking well actually that doesn't really make any sense. Because nothing would work either. It's not like I could wash or do anything else. No. It really helped in the situation. But I used to love that.

Always think, oh, that'd be great. Yeah. Good old Bernard's what. But no, yeah. So there you go. There's a wrap up of some interesting questions. Yeah, they are. They are.

Have you ever forgot anything? As bad as I did. And if you've got any remedies for how to get rid of that pit in your stomach, that would be really helpful. I put music on and it didn't help. I was still in the moment of, no, just turn the music off and sit in silent, Charlotte. Make you feel even worse.

You sit there with your thoughts. I did. Think about what you've done. Not helping myself. Anyway, guys, have a fab weekend. Yes, enjoy the weekend. Put up your Christmas decks. If you haven't already, I've seen so many people that have put on.

Literally took their Halloween decorations down. First of December for me. I do get why they have in a way. Because if I do feel it a bit, but for me, It's the first of us. Again, we've got our own thing that we do. Yeah. So it's like...

Yeah, because Morgan told me about what you drink when you put the tree up. Shh. Don't tell everyone. Oh, sorry. I'm joking. Yeah, so we do. We quickly, we, when we put the tree up, we put Christmas songs on and we have a ginger wine. No one's ever even heard of it, do they?

I've never heard that before. I have to join with lemonade. It's about this much ginger wine. It's just an old thing again that I used to do with my granddad and then my mom. Yeah. And then now I do it of mine. Oh, that's a nice thing. So literally if I go and put my decoration, my mom will go,

have you got your ginger wine. Oh, that's the most important thing about putting the Christmas of this year. I think you'd like it with a bit of lemonade. So is it alcoholic? I think, yeah, I presume so. Yeah, and the kids drink it as well? Yeah, I mean, I've just gripped.

Why not? It's not like a glass of wine. I think you're supposed to drink it. You're supposed to drink it like that. But I, because I've, as a kid, they would have given me a little bit. Yeah. You know, it was like back in the day. Like, oh, God.

They would have given me that. much with lemonade. I still drink it like that now as a paddle. So you could have more alcohol but you don't. So mine drink it the same as me. But yeah, that's our little thing. Oh, very nice. Don't tell me off. Don't come for me. Yeah. No, love it. Love the Christmas tradition. Yeah. Yeah, no, with my birthday being on the 25th of November, we don't do that till after my birthday at least. So yeah, it tends to be around the, so 1st of December whatever day is or on the weekend? Yeah. what me yeah

usually if it's on the first if it's if it's just it can't be before so let's say the so either the first or the weekend of after which if the first

and Monday it's quite a long time to wait yeah so maybe get out one evening you know what I mean it's one of them in it yeah no ours tends to fall around the same time but before we go

actually next week to your birthday celebrations so we'll have lots to talk about yeah doing it a bit early this year because November's a very busy time Yeah, it is.

You're away. I'm away. So, yeah, we've got one weekend. But yeah, we're doing something different. So we save that for the next pod. Wait to hear. See you later. Adios.