The Rising’s Growing Together Podcast - Why January Makes You Feel Behind (And How To Reset Your Mindset)

Episode Date: January 18, 2026

January has a way of making so many of us feel behind, overwhelmed and questioning ourselves. In this episode of Growing Together, we talk honestly about motherhood chaos, comparison culture, social media pressure, the “rest vs lazy” mindset, and how to stop spiralling when life feels messy.From dealing with a stressful parenting emergency mid-workday, to feeling emotionally drained after the holidays, to navigating unrealistic expectations around success this episode is real, raw and relatable.If you’ve been feeling behind in life, burnt out, unmotivated or stuck in comparison mode… this one’s for you 🤍👇 Let us know in the comments Have you been feeling this January slump too?Don’t forget to like, subscribe and join our Growing Together community 💫

Hi, we got, hi, little, blah, blah. Hi, everybody. Bloopers. I got all tongue-tide then. Hi, everyone. Compose, right. We're not perfect. Hi, everyone.

Hey. Welcome to another episode of the Rising, Growing Together. Um, oh, God, yeah, that's all flustered to be there. Hi, guys. Cool. Um, have you been? I'm good. First week back.

Yeah. Full week back. Yeah. It started off nice and slow. And then we had an accident in the week. Oh. Yeah, like child related accident. So I'm doing a workshop.

I've got four or five people on the call. It's five minutes to spare before, straight back to back into another workshop with another four or five people training. And Liam runs up to the door, which is obviously glass, so I can see straight through it, flapping, Hayden in his arms,

a teetail and like shouting at me. and then like run away again. So I was like, oh, just give me a second, guys, jumped up and ran out. And he was like, we've got to go to the hospital. I was like, run back in. I was like, guys, I've got to go. Ended the call. Sent a quick message to the other one.

Like, guys, I have to rearrange the next call. Ran into the house, blood everywhere. Oh, my God. He's tripped, smashed his mouth on the table that he cut his chin on like a week ago. So I'm definitely going to have to get rid of this table. But obviously, without putting his hands down, so his whole face has gone in, but it's smashed the outside,

but his tooth has gone through his lip on the inside. So it's just, like, blood all over the floor. This teetail's covered in blood. So Liam's that holding down the, I'm glad I wasn't there when it actually happened. By the time I'd got there, we were like, I was grabbing the bag, put my shoes on, run into the car. Kaysen's like, oh, like run with Liam,

and then we're by the car. And I was like, right, how bad is it? Because I hadn't even seen it. And he was trying to look and Hayden's crying. and, you know, but... Chaos. Chaos for five minutes, but then... It feels like forever.

Yeah. But there's not really... Like, I knew straight away and even Liam said it, there's not much they can do. Like, unless his lip is completely, like, flapping. There's... There won't you see it? You just see, basically, it was more just like a pierce...

Yeah. Than anything to be treated. I mean, it was a massive lump. It's all purple. It's blood. But the blood slowed down now because he's held pressure on it. And like I say, there's not much they can. can do about it unless if it's gaping they will stitch it but if not it's it's fine um so we ended up

just like you say consoling him and he had not long um was that that day oh yeah no it was the day after so the day after then he went to nursery and then they gave me a phone call saying he's got a temperature so i had to pick him up so he's like i've got a boshed up lit he'd know that was it he'd hit his head at nursery earlier that day so he had a bruise on his head come home and smash his mouth The next day he's got a temperature. He's like full of cold and he's all ill. But yeah, that was a bit frantic and chaotic like, ah! But then I didn't realize like there was blood all over the floor and I'm trying to lock the patio door to like run out the house.

And then Kaysen's like, like he's going to die. And I was like, Kaysen, don't say that, like thinking that he's exaggerating or something. And then it was like I realized after talking to him, like he was really panicky. He saw blood out. I think he actually genuinely thought he was going to die. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He was like, I thought, you know, one and a half he was going to die. It's not a nice experience.

Well, it's the first time Casey's really seen, like, a lot of blood. And didn't realize, like, a cup can bleed like that. But in this area as well, it was more. So we ended up having to, like, console Kaysen, console Hayton, stop them both crying. And, oh, God, yeah. But, no, that was a bit of a, oh. Yeah, taking it from someone who's had all my three. This is the first big accident.

Kaysen never had any of those. Your one is very much like all my three. Like Hayson's quite chilling, he's never really took it that far. The odd bump, but not actually, had a panic. Already you can see in Hayden that he's like my not. Yeah. My've been to A&E, all for him. Not in my presence, it didn't happen. However, the same thing, other children cry in, soul in them, and da-da-da-da-da-da.

Yeah. Especially like mid-like meeting. Well, our first full week. Yeah. We made it. We made it. We made it through the week. Children are still alive.

Yeah. Back to hobbies, all that chaos. And yeah, we've got a big lip, but we made it through. Bless it. Blessing. Release is cheap. Yeah. Yeah.

They look okay. Yeah. Yeah. That was the next thing because, like, they sometimes they die, don't there? They go grey and stuff. So we'll see. But no, touch wood. He was all right.

Another experience to the bag. Yeah. Of motherhood. Her and hood. Yeah. Yeah. Siblinghood. Yeah.

Oh God. But no, he's all good. He's all good. But yeah. I, yeah. Nothing's really happened. I, that's basically probably my problem. Nothing's really happened.

I was feeling. I say was feeling. I get moments anyway, but you know, like the first like full week back, I felt like I was behind. I don't know what in, by the way. So like it was a bit like,

I don't know if it's just, I'm not on much, but just society, you know, social media or whatever, just the way January is, New Year and all that, I felt like, oh, I'm missing something. I need to be doing this, I need to be doing that. Yeah. As much as I, like I said, I didn't have resolutions. I had, you know, shit to get done kind of listing and thinking I should have had it all done and I haven't done anything and, you know, putting this pressure on myself. Until I see you, until I see you didn't even have a diary for this year yet. Exactly.

So I was, oh, I'm sweet. I'm absolutely fine. I got my list. Yeah, I've got my diary. I got my 226 diary last year. I'm all right. But yeah, just having that feeling, I felt, you know, just for a moment, I felt like, oh, God, you know, what's happening? No, I think that's really typical this time again.

I think a lot of people could probably relate to that. I even saw Kate Ferdinand come on and go like, this is, you know, wasn't sure whether to post this. but I just feel like I've got a really bad January or December hangover in January and it's not through like the drinking and the eating and the socialising, but just emotionally drained from it all. Yeah. Had a lovely time. So they've moved to Dubai and I think they went back to the UK.

So just emotionally drained from just socialising, being around people, probably then having to say bye and go. And it's just a lot of pressure comes with December. Even though it's lovely and even though we have lots of family times, and there's still just a lot of pressure. And like I say, for a lot of stress, it's either the really busy time in work, you know, if you're in retail,

whatever that sort of thing, to that it's probably one of the longest times we all kind of get off together. Yeah. In like a block, you know what I mean? I think so anyway. I was thinking this. Most people, yeah.

So then to then go back and this pressure, you know, of 1st of January, go, go, go, go. kind of thing. And it's not bad. I'm not saying it's not a bad thing and it's a good incentive for some people to keep up the bum. But at the same time, I feel... Good in my pajamas for three weeks.

Yeah, just chill out on me. I said this one, just chill out on me a bit, you know? Like, you just want to... But it's good to have it, but don't also feel like... It's the comparing, probably. It's the comparing of what they're there or these, they're doing that, and they've already achieve this. That's the only place that that negative feeling comes.

from because you can have the feeling of oh i've not got quite got through my to do list and stuff but it's when you're then comparing where she looks like she's got her shit together and how can she be you know at work and doing all these things and then run a house and make the kids very healthy breakfast and like it's the comparing that then gives you that really shitty feeling that you end up with and i think i think actually the December and january of all the months in the is probably the worst for that because you've got the pressure of new year, new me, whilst also having the highlight reel of everyone having these fantastic Christmases and presents and, you know, immaculately dressed or like matching bejam, you know,

like there's a lot of pressure for Christmas. There is. With like the money that you spend and how you look and like I said, this highlight reel of how everyone's doing so amazing and time off and spending it doing this at the other. But that's what the highlight real. a clip. Yeah. It's literally that, you know. And okay, what's what's done in between. Yeah. That would help that. But it's not always like that. People don't, it's not always what you see. Yeah. You know what I mean? You can, you can be like that. I'm not saying you can't. But don't put

yourself, don't put that pressure on yourself. Yeah. For looking at that and thinking, oh my God, yeah. I'm not there. Yeah. No, I think it's natural that we all get that feeling and it's when you're in that is sometimes hard to snap out of it. And I think sitting with that for too long isn't great because you then just spiral into telling yourself everything about your life is shit. When actually it could just be this one little thing and actually then it's like, this is shit and that shit and everything's rubbish. And I'm like so behind and I want this, this and this and then you just don't actually

appreciate anything in your life. I'm probably negative negative. Yeah, you do. You end up spiraling and it can put you in a right funk if you sit there for too long. Well, that was it. I'm, this is where I was at, I think, of the balance of, um, I know we should spoke on it before of am I being lazy? Am I being lazy here?

I think that's one thing that I think it's millennials like our generation struggle with because I see it all the time maybe because I'm feeling it and it comes up on my algorithm. But like, am I resting or am I lazy? And I think we struggle as a generation with resting. And I think that is the biggest comparison with the next. Was it Gen Z is the next or something or whatever. And they're all very much about their. mental health and like, oh, yeah, no, and peace and boundaries.

Because where our Fridays off came from. Thank you. Thanks, Jenzy. But we aren't like that. They do say that actually the worst generation is our generation because our parents were in a slightly different like economic time where, yeah, they could have one parent in the household working and still manage to do a lot of things. Whereas we don't have and we also don't have the village that surrounds like bringing

kids up like our parents did. We do try to do it all ourselves. And I think that is the, we spoke about that work, like mother load, of carrying everything yourself. But no, I think the comparing is comparison

steals today's joy because you, you completely forget about appreciating anything that you've got going on. So I think, and I definitely do it, I'm definitely, you know, not preaching that it doesn't affect me

because it absolutely does. Like you say, I'll go through waves of, I really appreciate my life. I'm very happy with everything. I'm going at my own pace. And then the next week you can be like, I should be having this right now and this and why haven't this happened? And so I'm very much, like you say, it's a roller coaster.

But I think there's definitely things we can do to help ourselves in those situations because it's going to happen to all of us. I don't think you can avoid it. No. But you can help it. Well, I know for me when I feel like generally, I can't, to be honest, it's a general thing is a list, right in a list of what, what, what's going on? What do you, what do you need to get done?

Yeah. In a priority kind of thing. And what's, what do you need to sort out first? Yeah. So then just breathe again to carry on again. Because it's not, you're not going to get all that done in one day. Yeah. But as you go through it, I also like just ticking it off.

Yeah. It's nice, just a little accomplishment. Yeah, I'm a, like you said, with your diary, because you're a pen and paper diary. That's me. I'm everything to pen and paper. Even when I go to the shop. My little list is on a little recycled, ripped up bit of paper, you know what I mean, going to the shop. But yeah, mine's lists just to get it out on paper.

Yeah. And then go through it. And then it doesn't always feel so bad, you know, because some of it can't even deal with it anyway. But it's in your mind. So I think that is definitely a very big tip if you're not doing that already. Get it out your mind into paper. And like you say, prioritise it. It's exactly how I do it at work.

Like there's a million and one things I want to do at work. We've got, you know, loads of things that we have to do in order to hit numbers and do all of that. So we literally break it down, right? Here's everything. What needs to be done in January? What can I put off till February? What am I not even going to look at till March? Because I have to wait for another team to be available.

And then all of a sudden it's like, okay. So, yeah, even like saying, feeling pressure at work. But I've actually only got four things I need to focus on for the next week or two. And the rest of it's written down. so I don't have to now keep it in my mind. And they do say that for people that struggle to fall asleep because of worrying and overthinking and, you know, your mind.

So I've got the doctor's mind. I've got to do this next weekend by actually just having pen and paper by your bed and just brain dumping whatever you're thinking about on paper, it allows you to them relax because you're not worried about forgetting it. Yeah. Because a lot of the time we do keep it in our mind. There's nothing you can do with it. You go in bed.

Exactly. Just get it out. Yeah. Then you, you, they say. say that you can have a better sleep. I know that has that helps. So that's definitely something that I would, I would do. Yeah.

You know what I mean? To help me feel just, again, a little bit more on top and I'm not pressured and I'm all right. You know, I am, I am going to, you know, go do that. I think what's hard is a lot of it is like just society pressure of like, oh, I should do things in this order. And by this age, I should have had that by now. And I should have bought a house and I should have met someone.

I should be having kids. And all of those should have would have could of things. You were saying that about the generation. Of the generation because we were brought up. Yep, you meet someone, you get married, you buy a house, you then have kids and you do it by your 30 and then you have this little white picket fence life. And like that may be suited the generation before. But we have so much more at our fingertips in terms of the internet in terms of traveling.

Like we're in a different world. Yeah. Like a different economy. Like you can't. And actually I think what we need to do is. Do I actually want that and actually ask yourself? Because a lot of the time, and I grew up doing this, like putting so much pressure on myself of I have to pick the right, you know, A levels

and I have to pick the right university and then I have to do this. And like I've spent so many hours, wasted hours, probably have added up to weeks of my life wasted in stressing and worrying about stuff. Yeah. But actually a lot of the time, it's people pleasing things that I don't even care about. Yes. Or that I've grown to realize aren't my priority. but they feel like I should do.

Well, what I find funny is that we usually end up comparing to people, like even if it's in a reel of this short clip or someone else's life, we usually compare it to something that's not even relevant to us. Yeah, I think getting, peeling back and actually ask yourself, what do you really care about? If you only want this thing to please your parents, scrap it. If you only want this thing so that you have status against other people, then, you know, by the time you actually get it done, it's going to be an empty feeling because it's not really what you want.

Exactly. So really get clear on, I think, what you want is the first place because sometimes we think we want it. Yeah. So many times I think I've wanted something and then I've got it and I'm like, well, I was a bit of a waste. So get clear. But sometimes also there can be experiences, like you say, a lesson learned kind of thing. Sometimes you have to learn it the hard way. It has to go that way.

Yeah. Like you said, I said, writing it down and then you say actually looking and going, right, what is it that I want of this and what's priority? Yeah. And what's important. And I think you need to. And what's relevant to me. Yeah.

And exactly. But also, I think don't be hard on yourself. Yeah. You know, we're all in our own journey, our own time. We've all, there's nobody, even if they look like they've got the same situation as you, do not have the same situation as you. So be real. And don't compare your day one to somebody's 10 year in business. I do that a lot. Like, you know, looking at coaches. Well, why haven't I got that? Well, yeah, because they've done it for 15 years and I'm starting out.

So, like, rather, and this is a bit of a mindset shift, which I think is another thing that can really help. Rather than look and be envious, like it's not a very nice feeling to sit in like jealousy and envy. switch that to be inspired. So if they've got that, what do they have that I actually want? And what can I replicate that they're doing? Right, well, I know that they post weekly on social media, right? Well, I should probably start doing that then, shouldn't I?

So you pick your positives and that gives you a positive back. And be inspired by it rather than have that horrible energy of like, oh, and just because somebody else has it doesn't mean you can't have it. And I think we definitely live in a world like that. And this is why I'm so glad we've done. these women events because the women that we are surrounding ourselves with are women who, you know, push each other and inspire each other. And just because you've had success doesn't mean I'm not going to. There's no shortage in success in money, in, you know, abundance and whatever.

Like, I can have just as much as you, if not more, and at different times, like, we can celebrate each other because it doesn't take away from me you being successful. Exactly. We're all about growing each other. Yeah. And I think that's, that's exactly, I think, what we should finish with, to be fair, because that is good advice. Bringing the way we bring our community together. Yeah. As well, you know, of picking each other up. It's not about, oh, well, they're being jealous. Like you say, it's about being inspired and helping each other and giving each of the confidence and growing each other. Yeah, for sure. And everything that comes with that. And I think one thing that helped me, because there are people,

out there like that, that will pick you up, that will shout for you, that will celebrate you. And there's a lot of people that don't. Yes. So what I found really helps is we're all on our phones way too much. But, you know, can't help that sometimes. But just digital detox yourself. There's so many accounts I've unfollowed. And I'm so glad I'm not looking at it again.

Like, you know, just, oh, me, flashy in my car. Like, you know, get up and work hard. You're not working hard enough. Right. That doesn't really help me. so I'm going to follow people who are like, you want what I've got. Well, here's some secrets of my success

and this is what I've done. Little voices, aren't they all the way? So they're change their little voices. Yeah. Just change what you follow. Yeah. Like, you know what I mean? Like they end up being them.

Yeah. Voices in your head, don't they? Of what you're scrolling through. So even something as simple as realizing what you are seeing on a day to day thing, whether that's on a screen, whether that's around the people that you hear and talk to.

Yeah. There was a few accounts that I realized that every time I come across them, it annoyed me or it gave me that feeling. Unfollow. Exactly. I like that. I like that. And follow. Bye.

And that really helped. And then I, you know, those accounts don't bother me anymore. And then I'm following more that are inspiring and more that are uplifting and that, you know, promotes stuff. Give you that more of a inspiring feeling. More of a positive, you know, mindset with things and that it feels more. aspirational and the, yeah, like motivational. Like, yeah, I can get that too. Thanks. Yeah. So don't feel, don't feel pressured.

Just, just know where you need to go and get it all out and get yourself. Yeah. And a lot of the, that comes from not being, not taking action. So we can feel behind because I really want that, but I actually haven't done very much to get there. And it might be because you don't have all the answers, but just little tiny steps of, right, If I want to be there at some point in my future, what can I do today? What's one little thing that I can do today this week? And already you'll start to feel better because you're making strives. No matter how small the waves are, you're making your way there.

And that takes a lot of that pressure off you when you feel like you're accomplishing things. Again, I think it's a whole, in a general thing, it literally shifts that negativity mindset to more of a positivity mindset. Yeah. And that's doing all these little micro changes. or whatever help. But the truth is, we're in charge of our emotions. And if something else you're giving power to, to let bother you that much,

then you need to be accountable of you're actually in charge of how you feel and much better to feel positive and take small steps in trying to achieve something no matter what happens and take the pressure of the outcome. Like, you don't have to get it done by next week or next month, but just little things that you can do. And, yeah, distance yourself from whatever puts you in the, moods.

Yeah, agreed. I think helps. Agreed. Well, or just be real and post that you haven't got your this year calendar yet because it made me feel better, anyway. Yeah, exactly. Be honest. No, I think we definitely have got to a point where celebrities are showing a lot more vulnerability.

Like, I feel like shit or this is, look at my role. This is how I actually look in real life or, you know, I'm feeling really crap this January. Like, we're getting better at showing that stuff, but I think a lot of people still hide out. And it's okay to do, to do feel like that. and do those things. Like you say, it's just knowing how to go forward in making sure that you don't stay in those feelings. Yeah.

Yeah. Give yourself time to rest but then kick yourself up the ass and move yourself on. Yeah. Cool. Right. Well, thanks for joining us for another week. As always, please like, subscribe, comment. We love reading the comments.

Any questions you have. We'll be happy to shout you out and answer any questions. And yeah, please subscribe. A Charlotte heart Oh no I forgot I keep up heart Bye guys