The Royals of Malibu - 2. My Wicked Stepbrothers

Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi guys! Thanks for joining my live and for being so patient while I got warmed up for you all. I'm Kalim Royle. I was a friend of your fathers. I'm so sorry, Ella, but I'm here because you're done passed away recently. You'll stay with me and my kids in Los Angeles. Malibu, technically. Oh, my fucking god. That's $10,000 cash.

Starting point is 00:00:36 Each month you stay in the house and refrain from sex work of any kind that will give you another $10,000. What's the catch? There's always a catch. Ella meet the boys. This is my oldest Reed. He's a senior. Like what you see?

Starting point is 00:00:51 Oh, sorry. I mean, usually I'm the one with my close-up. And this is Easton. He's a junior, same as you. Are all of the royal boys as deranged as you are? Ha-ha! No way, babe. I'm one of a kind.

Starting point is 00:01:04 In a dorm with 15 other porn stars. She's probably scamming Dad. What have I gotten myself into? One note we should mention. This episode contains adult language and subject matter that may not be appropriate for younger audiences. Please take care in the sing. [♪ Music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing the background, music playing in the background, music playing the background, music playing in the background, music playing the background, music playing the background, music playing the background, music playing Don't you want me here? I mean, I don't know.

Starting point is 00:01:45 You were tossing in your sleep. You seemed stressed. Yeah, things have been really hard lately. Why don't I help you relax? Hmm. Hmm. What are we doing? Take this off. Hmm. What are we doing? Take this off.

Starting point is 00:02:10 When I wake up the morning after my flight to Malibu, for a minute, I forget where I am. It's less than 24 hours in and I'm already having a wet dream about my stepbrother. Perfect. But then I look around at my new millennial pink, girly-ass bedroom, and I remember everything. It looks like a love-shock fancy throw up in here, but I don't hate it. Wow. I can't believe I live here. And then I snap myself out of it and go into survival mode.

Starting point is 00:03:00 I don't know how long this is going to last, so... I need to play this right and make it count. I hide the 10 grand calum gave me a my deposit under the loose floorboards eastern showed me last night. It's actually a great hiding spot now that eastern has moved to drugs. I do some quick math if calum gives me another 10k per month for the rest of the school year, I'll have enough to move anywhere I want in no time. Then I won't have to depend on anyone. move anywhere I want in no time. Then I won't have to depend on anyone. Then it takes me about 10 seconds to impact the rest of my things. Now, where do I put your photo, Mom?

Starting point is 00:03:38 Look at this ridiculous bedroom. You would have loved this. It's so girly. Rita, what are you doing in here? Does no one knock in this house? You would have loved this. It's so girly Rita! What are you doing in here? Does no one knock in this house? You feeling okay? You're bright red and makes your freckles stand out. I'm fine. It's probably just stress-hives from strangers barging into my room. Look, I need to...

Starting point is 00:03:59 Are you gonna tell my dad what you saw last night? Oh, you mean you sneaking back into the house last night with literal blood on your hands? I haven't decided yet. For real, I need you to keep your mouth shut about this. I don't need to do anything. I don't answer to you. I'm serious. If you were serious, you'd be less of an asshole when you ask for a favor.

Starting point is 00:04:19 What do I get out of it if I help you out anyway? You want to see my abs again? You know, you are not as hot as you think you are. If I could out of it if I help you out anyway. Hmm? You want to see my abs again? You know, you are not as hot as you think you are. Confidence and cocky are two totally different things, and you are on the wrong side of it. Look, just keep this to yourself, or you'll be sorry. Starting a new school will be hard enough.

Starting point is 00:04:38 It'd be awful if someone started a rumor about you on day one. Okay, bye. Read for the love of God. I'm not going to tell. Oh, hi, Calum. I'm sorry, I should have knocked. It's been a while since we've had a lady in the house. I suppose we've picked up some bad habits.

Starting point is 00:05:03 It's fine, Calum. I'm just joking. Joking means good. I take it you're settling in well. Have the boys been bothering you? No, breed was just welcoming me to Malibu. What's up? I want to make sure you're ready for school today. Already? I literally just got here. Academics are extremely important, and the Kovacademy is expecting you. I pulled some strings to get you in mid semester. I'm not going to be able to do that.

Starting point is 00:05:23 I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. Already? I literally just got here. Academics are extremely important, and the COVID Academy is expecting you. I pulled some strings to get you in mid semester. Look, I know you had this deal with my dad or whatever, and I really appreciate you putting me up. I mean, this house is insane, but you aren't actually my parent-calum. I'll check out the school, but only because I'm going to look great in that uniform. I'll take that. I also wanted to give you this. Wow, evicting me already. It's the letter your mother sensed to you before she...

Starting point is 00:05:57 I thought you might want to have it. Oh, thank you. We're meeting with the headmaster at 8.30. Yeah, okay, be down soon. Steve, my name is Margaret Sinclair. And 15 years ago, we had a weakened fling that left me pregnant. I've tried to contact you over the years and never received a response,

Starting point is 00:06:30 but I hope you'll reconsider this time around. You have a daughter. Her name is Ella. She has your eyes and your laugh. I think if you just met her, you would love her just as much as I do. Steve, I'm dying. I was diagnosed with cancer and the doctors believe I have six months left.

Starting point is 00:06:57 Maybe less. I'm not scared of death, but I am afraid of leaving Ella alone in the world. We don't have any family, and I need to know that you'll have somewhere to go when I'm gone. I hope you find it in your heart to take care of our girl. If you do, I promise she'll be the best thing that's ever happened to you, because she's the best thing that's ever happened to you, because she's the best thing that ever happened to me. Margaret.

Starting point is 00:07:32 G's mom, you had to make me cry on my first day of school. At least I cried before I put on my makeup, right? OK, enough with the water works. Time to make myself look human. After two years of top ramen for dinner, seeing the amount of food in this house is insane. It's like a Costco in here. Are you making us breakfast? Hmm. I think this new sister thing isn't such a bad idea. Ella, we can get Starbucks on the way to school. You really don't have to cook. Oh, I like cooking. Anyway, it's just eggs. Yeah, Dad, let Elizabeth...

Starting point is 00:08:32 Ella. Let Ella make us breakfast. Ella is not your employee. It's okay. Really? I'll just add some more eggs. That's very generous of you. None for me, thanks. I'm employee. It's okay. Really? I'll just add some more eggs. That's very generous of you.

Starting point is 00:08:49 None for me, thanks. I only have green juice before noon. Eastern, where's your brother? I don't know upstairs, I guess. We'll go get him. Now, if Ella's cooking for us, we'll have a family breakfast. You know, Kellum, I'm trying bit hungry breakfast. You know, Calum, I'm trying to make a good impression and you're kind of killing the vibe.

Starting point is 00:09:11 You know, their mom also used to cook when they were little. What a soul when they got older. Why not? You never asked her? My business was struggling back then and it consumed me. I thought I was being a good provider, but I can admit that I wasn't particularly present with my family. I should have been a better father, better husband. I'm trying to make up for it now, but maybe it's too late. I mean, yeah, I've only been here a day and I can already tell this whole house needs

Starting point is 00:09:48 some serious therapy. Fine, me included. But don't rich guys get like 8,000 chances? I wouldn't count you out just yet. Well, anyways, enough about my shortcomings as a father. Hey, at least you gave them all this. It's a lot more than mine ever did. Steve wanted to be a dad.

Starting point is 00:10:14 If my mom reached out to him, how come you just learned about me? Why didn't he tell you that he had a daughter? I don't know. It's fine. We didn't need him anyway. Mom and I did just fine on our own. Fine. Steve told me your mother was a stripper when he met her.

Starting point is 00:10:34 Yeah, so what? So she's a bad mom just because you don't respect the way she kept her roof over her heads? You're right, I misspoke. I just meant that she seemed to be struggling financially. I came out wrong. Whatever. Now I know what you really think of me

Starting point is 00:10:49 and where I come from. Whoa, trouble and paradise? Read. Nice of you to join us. Smells like a school cafeteria near. Last time I cook you breakfast. Oh, don't worry, I'm sure you'll find other ways to be useful. Now that you're on Dad's payroll. Okay, that's enough.

Starting point is 00:11:08 Ella and I are meeting with the headmaster, so I'll take her to school today. But starting tomorrow, she'll be writing with you boys. So plan accordingly. Hope you like driving fast. It's basically enough one race every morning. Hmm. I have a feeling I know a little bit more about living dangerously than you. We'll see about that.

Starting point is 00:11:44 The Kov Academy is on a bluff in Malibu overlooking the Pacific. It looks more like a four seasons than a high school. The Cova Academy is the most elite prep school on the West Coast. With your excellent grades, I'm sure you'll have no trouble fitting in. Literally nothing about me screams elite prep school, but sure, Calam. It's usually impossible to enroll a student after the semester begins, but I manage to work it out. Made a big donation?

Starting point is 00:12:13 Something like that. But it will be worth it. If you do well here, you'll be set up for life. When we get to the Headmaster's office, Calum and the Headmaster chat like old friends, basically ignoring me in favor of discussing their golf swing. After listening to them drone on about something with a carbon twist face, which sounds painful, a very peppy student arrives to give me a tour. Are you Ella?

Starting point is 00:12:52 Savannah Gonzalez. So nice to meet you. Hi. Is there a church nearby? No. Those are our school bells. They play the Westminster Chimes between classes. Wild.

Starting point is 00:13:06 My old school bell sounded like the world's most aggro alarm clock. Or a prison siren. Oh no. The Chimes are meant to be soothing. Big Ben plays them as well. Big Ben is a really big clock tower in London. I know what Big Ben is. Totally.

Starting point is 00:13:23 Anyway, I'm supposed to give you a campus tour. The gems right over there are... Our gymnasium is the largest school gym in all of Southern California. That's a lot of awards! I know, right? I'm on the varsity swim team and I run a beach volleyball club for fun. Just something extra for my college applications. Do you play any sports?

Starting point is 00:13:48 Callum, my guardian, I guess, is pushing me to try out for the swim team. He says extra curriculars are an integral part of the high school experience. Exactly. I'm an athlete. I'm in all the school plays and I have a 4.5-way to GPA.

Starting point is 00:14:04 But my life coach says, if I don't start my own'm in all the school plays and I have a 4.5-way to GPA, but my life coach says, if I don't start my own nonprofit in the next six months, my dad's gonna have to shell out a ton of cash to get me into Harvard. Legally, of course. Hey, I heard it helps to pretend you're on a rowing team. Just something that you might wanna start thinking about for your future.

Starting point is 00:14:21 Yeah, I'm taking it all one day at a time for now. We totally living in the moment is so in right now. Do you meditate? My gratitude journal has been a total game changer. This is our dining hall. The chefs here are all amazing. And there are always phenomenal vegan and low-carb options.

Starting point is 00:14:48 How many teenagers are low-carb? Most of us. The keto and intermittent fasting combo is so legit. I haven't had bread in years, but I'm pretty sure there are like methods somewhere if you're into that. Here's the grassy knoll. A lot of students hang out here during lunch or during free period. The Rose Garden is behind the Archway. It was donated by the Stooshy Movie Producer

Starting point is 00:15:16 so as kids could get on. Everyone here is like shockingly good looking. Yeah, a few people already have modeling hot trucks, but most of us are just influencers. Oh, for real. Well, added to their extracurriculars. Exactly. Where are you transferring from anyway? Fresno. It was a different vibe for sure. I gathered that from your skinny jeans. They're thrifted.

Starting point is 00:15:47 Totally. I wish I could pull off something so out of style. Look, Ella, the Cove is a very special place, and every student here was admitted because they're exceptional. Most of us have been going to school together since the first grade, and unless someone books a pilot or takes a gap year in Europe,

Starting point is 00:16:04 we're making the most of our opportunity here. It's a rich kid paradise. I guess I'm wondering, how did you get here? What is that supposed to mean? You're staying with the royals, right? They're so mysterious. Especially, Reed. No one can get close to him and suddenly you drop out of nowhere and you're living Especially, Reed. Wow, I thought girls were supposed to stick together! Look, Ella, I'm going to be super helpful and give you some advice.

Starting point is 00:16:51 It's not easy being rich and successful at such a young age. It's actually very hard, and the two things every student at the Cove hates. Is it gold digger? And a wannabe. I sincerely hope that's not you. Thanks for the hot tip. I gotta run, but the main hall is back that way. See you in class, Ella.

Starting point is 00:17:13 Good luck. I'm not a bad guy. Cross at the crosswalk. Fuck, Calum, where are you? You're a man to bandage you too, huh? See, you're part of the family already. Eason, shouldn't you be in class? I'm Dijon, gotta think. By thing, do you mean a fat blunt? Yeah, I do.

Starting point is 00:18:00 Actually, teachers tend to look the other way when you turn a Benjamin in with your homework. So you can waste your amazing opportunity at the Cove, but I can't? One, I don't give a fuck what you do. Two, I am a degenerate, and everyone knows it. My advice is to keep expectations low. And three, let's cut your skinny jeans in a twist. Seriously, this place is like the fashion police. I've been here for like an hour and Savannah Gonzales already called me a gold digger.

Starting point is 00:18:28 I'm pretty sure she'll have spread it to the whole school by lunch. Well, you're currently stranded in a parking lot with no right home, so I think that makes you a pretty bad gold digger. Shut up. Besides, Savannah's petty as hell. That said, I would recommend staying on her good side. She has minions and they could probably make your life miserable. Yeah, I'm already very much not on her good side.

Starting point is 00:18:52 Well, I could tell you how I went her over, but it involved the hot tub and bail in quite a few orgasms. Please stop talking. If my dad does show up, tell him that you saw me studying or something, aching a chem test. Like he would believe me. Hey, too brute? If you're leaving anyway, can you saw me studying or something, as he's in a chem test. Like he would believe me. Hey, too rude? If you're leaving anyway, can you give me your right home?

Starting point is 00:19:09 Sorry, can't be seen with a gold digger. Easton, please. Today is really sucked. Yeah, sorry about that, but hey, if you've already tried being good, maybe you try being really, really bad. Only still have more fun that way. Why do I kind of like you? Well, I'm fun. Ugly hot, like Adam Driver, and I seem like I'm probably good in bed, right? You seem like you have HPV.

Starting point is 00:19:31 Okay, the real reason why girls like me, though, is because I'm simultaneously a bad boy in a sweet art. I didn't mean I liked you like the hat. Not yet. Think about it, Ella. We could be so bad together. As Eastern drives away, I think about his advice. Playing by the rules has gotten me nowhere. Maybe Eastern was right.

Starting point is 00:19:59 Maybe it is time to play dirty. On the next episode of The Royals, Malibu, Ella agrees to look the part. She also attends her first ever cove party. Alright, sis, you're the rules for the night. Don't hang out with us, because I'm trying to get some, and I don't need you crack-blocking. Luckily, she manages to find her first, and possibly only, ally at school.

Starting point is 00:20:35 I'm Valerie, by the way. For what it's worth, you are high-key serving. Are you the new girl? But is that going to be enough to keep the royals at bay? This is my world, and you need to listen to me. When I want your advice, Royal, I'll ask. You won't want to miss it. Listen to episode three of The Royals of Malibu right now.

Starting point is 00:20:57 The Royals of Malibu is a production of diversion audio, an association with pod people, based on the book Paper Princess by Erin Watt, directed by Matt Sav, written by Kiana Katty Blue, produced by Amy Machado, Emma D'Amuth and Jacob Bronsting, production management by Ashton Carter, story editing by Lindsay Plussard,

Starting point is 00:21:21 story development by Emma D'Amuth and Jacob Bronsting. Editorial Direction by Scott Wussard, story development by Emma Demuth, and Jacob Bronstane, editorial direction by Scott Waxman. Casting by Lindsay Plussard, Alex Vickmanis, and Mayang Batter, editing, sound design, and engineering by Morgan Fouce and Michael Aquino, the music by Eric Zyler, featuring the voices of Alyssa McKay as Ella, Zaria as Savannah, Chris

Starting point is 00:21:48 Cafferro as Reed, Nick Cafferro as Eastern, Armin Taylor as Calum, Francesca Agramonte as Valerie, Anna Rubinova as Brooke, Mora Vincent as Steina, Stephanie Sherry, as Lucy, and Margaret Sinclair, and Kieran Reagan, as David. Executive producers for Diversion Audio, Jake Bronstein,

Starting point is 00:22:14 Mark Francis, and Scott Waxman. Executive producers for POD People, Rachel King, and Matt Zav, Special Thanks to Kimberly Brower,

Starting point is 00:22:24 Jen Frederick, and Elle Kennedy. Diversion Audio. Diversion Audio

The Royals of Malibu - 2. My Wicked Stepbrothers

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