The Ryan Leak Podcast - Career Dysmorphia

Episode Date: May 11, 2026

You can be world-class at one thing and completely obsessed with another. I’ve got a friend who is the best speaker I know — the kind of communicator who stops rooms — but what he really wants to do is sing. He’s an okay singer. And that gap between what he sees in the mirror and what the world actually sees? That’s career dysmorphia. It’s the professional version of looking at your reflection and seeing something that doesn’t match reality.In this episode, I’ll unpack why so many of us chase the wrong gift while ignoring the right one, and I’ll walk you through five filters to help you find your sweet spot — where what you’re good at, what you love, what you’re called to, what the world needs, and what can sustain you all overlap. Because the world doesn’t need you to be good at everything. It just needs you to be great at your thing.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Hello, my friends. Welcome back to the Ryan League podcast where we love to keep things short and sweet for you each and every week. Always want to just be able to give you just a nugget of inspiration that we believe will add value to the way that you show for your world each and every day. Today, I want to talk to you about this idea called career dysmorphia. Okay, career dysmorphia. I think we all know what body dysmorphia is. It's when someone looks in the mirror and sees something that is not there. They can be in an incredible shape, but all they see is flaws. Or they could be struggling, but they see perfection. The mirror somehow lies to them each and every day, and because the mirror lies,

they make decisions based on a distorted image. But what would you do if I told you the same thing could happen with your career? I'm calling it career dysmorphia. And I think more people have it than we realize. Career dysmorphia is when you look at your professional life and see something that doesn't match reality. Maybe you think you're crushing it in one area where you're actually average. Or maybe you're pouring yourself into a dream that was never really yours to begin with.

Or maybe, and this is the one that really gets me, you're genuinely world class at something, but you can't see it. because you're too busy chasing something else. It's the mirror lying to you about your career. I've got a friend who I think is the best communicator and speaker that I know. Remarkable. I'm talking elite. When this man steps on the stage, it's like the room stops breathing. He commands attention.

He moves people, his timing, his pace, his presence, his depth, everything that you would want in a dynamic communication. But you want to know what he wants to do the most. Sing. Yep. He wants to sing. And listen, he can sing. I mean, he's okay.

He's not terrible. I mean, he can carry a tune. He's probably better than most people at, like, karaoke. But he's not a world-class singer. Okay, he's a world-class speaker who happens to be an okay singer. And so here's where career dysmorphia kicks in. Because he looks in the mirror and sees a singer, the world looks at him and sees a speaker,

and he's frustrated because the applause he's getting isn't for the thing he wants to be applauded for. And I just wonder, have you ever been there? Like, have you ever been celebrated for something you didn't want to be known for, recognized in an area that wasn't actually your dream. It's a bizarre and strange kind of success. Because, I mean, you're winning, but it doesn't feel like you're winning because it's not the game you actually want it to play.

That's what I believe is career dysmorphia. And it's more common than you think. I see it all the time in corporate America. the brilliant engineer who wants to be in sales, the incredible salesperson who wants to be in leadership, the gifted leader who secretly just wants to be a creative. Everybody's looking across the hall, wishing they were in a different room,

while the room they're already in, is begging for more of what they've already got. I see it on social media too. People grinding to become influencers when they're actually incredible teachers, people trying to be comedians, when they're actually phenomenal writers, people chasing virality,

when their real gift is intimacy, and small rooms, and deep conversations, and one-on-one impact. It's like the mirror is lying to them. And because the mirror is lying, they're making career decisions based on a distorted image.

I remember years ago, over a decade ago now, I was a videographer. I was behind the camera. I was editing, I was producing, I was helping everyone else look good on screen. And I was good at it, really good. But every time I was behind that camera,

filming somebody else speak, there was this voice in me that said, I think I'm supposed to be on the other side of the lens. And people were genuinely confused when I started making that transition. You speak? Yeah, I actually, yeah, I actually kind of. I'd enjoy it.

But I thought you were the video guy. I know. I mean, I can, I actually can do both, but I actually think I could be better at the other. And here's what I want you to hear today. My journey from behind the camera to in front of one was not overnight. It wasn't some dramatic leap. It was a slow, honest process of evaluating what I was actually built for versus what I had settled into. I had to look in the mirror and ask some hard questions. Not just what do I want,

but what am I actually made for? Because wanting something doesn't mean you're wired for it and being comfortable with something doesn't mean it's your ceiling. So what do you do if you have career dysmorphia? What do you do if you are passionate about something but you may not be that good or if you're really good at something and you've really just lost heart? I'm going to give you five boxes to check, so to speak. If the thing that you're doing, checked us all five of these boxes, I promise you, you are definitely in a sweet spot. Now, full transparency. It used to be four boxes, and in my book, Chasing Failure, I have a whole chapter on discovering your sweet spot, and I talk about four things, but as I've gotten older, I think there's a fifth. Yeah, I'm mad and stuff.

I wish I could write a book called Hindsight, where I just go back and just fix all the stuff that I've put in previous books, but oh well, it's out there. So today, we write those wrongs. Today, I'm going to give you five boxes to check on if the thing that you're pursuing, if the thing that you're currently doing, checks these five boxes. I promise you, you're going to find yourself in a sweet spot. So here's the first box. You got to ask yourself, what are you good at? And this is important. This is very, very important. What are you good at that has been very very very? verified by others. Because here's what all of us, all of us have to understand.

We don't get to determine if we're good. We don't get to determine if we're good. And I know that sounds harsh, but it's true. Like you can think you're an incredible singer. You can feel it in your bones. You can sing in the shower and get goosebumps from your own voice. But if every audience you sing for checks their phone half, way through your second verse, the market is telling you something. Your talent is not defined by your

passion for it. It's defined by the impact it creates. Now, that doesn't mean you can't enjoy things that you're average at. You can sing all day long. You can play basketball at LA Fitness if you want. You could write poetry in your journal. But that doesn't mean you should build a career around something that the market hasn't validated. it. One of the most sobering realities that all of us have to come to grips with is we don't get to decide what we're good at. Other people do. We don't get to decide if we're good parents. Our kids decide that. We don't get to decide if we're good leaders, the people who follow us make that decision. So you have to be able to ask the people around you, not just the nice ones,

the honest ones. What am I actually good at? What do you come to me for? When do you see me me come alive in a way that also adds value to others because sometimes the thing that your best at is so natural to you that you don't even recognize it as a gift. You think everyone can do it, but they can't. That's why we need somebody from the outside to verify what we are good at. Box number two, what are you passionate about? And this is where it gets tricky, because you can be good at something and not love it. Trust me, I know plenty of professional athletes who are elite. physically gifted, top of their game.

But they have lost their love for their sport. They're in a good spot, but they're not in their sweet spot. Good spot means the numbers work. Sweet spot means the soul works too. If you're talented at accounting but you dread Monday mornings, you might be in a good spot, but not your sweet spot.

If you're a great manager, but leading people actually drains you instead of fueling you, you're performing well, perhaps in the wrong category. Passion matters because it's what sustains you when the work gets hard. Skill might get you the job, but passion keeps you in it. Skill can certainly not be getting a paycheck, but passion really is the thing that's going to protect your joy after you get paid.

So what lights you up? What would you do for free? What conversations make you lose track of time? What problems do you love solving? Not because you have to, but because but you just can't help yourself. That's passion. And if it's a sweet spot,

it absolutely has to be a part of the equation. Box. Number three, do you have the opportunity to live out what you love and you're good at? So first, we've got, we've figured out that we're good at it. Number two, we actually love doing it. And number three, we actually have an opportunity

to do something about it. Because here's the reality. Some people are gifted and passionate, but they're just stuck in an environment that doesn't give them a shot. They're in the wrong company, maybe in the wrong industry, maybe the wrong city.

They find themselves consistently in the wrong room. So you've got to evaluate the opportunities in front of you. Do you need to maximize what you currently have, or do you need to create an opportunity? I believe some of us are sitting on a gift, waiting for permission to use it. But I just, I got news for you. Nobody's going to tap you on the shoulder and say,

hey, I noticed you're incredible at this. Here's a stage. No, sometimes you've got to go build the stage yourself and start the podcast and launch the business and volunteer for the project that nobody wants and raise your hand in a meeting. And sometimes, well, it's the opposite. Sometimes the opportunity is already in front of you,

but you're so busy looking for a different door that you're ignoring the one that's already open. You're so focused on where you want to be that you're underperforming where you already are. My friend, evaluate the opportunities and either maximize them or create them, but don't just wait for them to come to you. Box number four, okay?

Do you feel like God put you on the planet to do it? Yeah, not just are you good, not just are you passionate, not do you just have opportunities to do it, but do you feel like it's a God thing? It's one thing to be in a sweet spot. It's another thing to be in a God spot. I believe everybody was created on purpose for a purpose. And there's a difference between something you can do and something you were called to do. One pays the bills.

The other one fulfills the mission that is living on the inside of you. Now, here's the fifth box that I've added. That's not in chasing failure, but it's here today. Can you get paid to do it? Yeah, I know that sounds unspiritual after what I just said, but it's practical because purpose without provision is just a hobby. And guess what? I know some people who are in a sweet spot and they do it as a volunteer. And that's okay.

But let's just let's just. let's just keep it a hundred today. All right, listen, that's, you can be in a godspot and sweet spot. I know I'm using the word spot a lot on this episode, and that's fine. But if your sweet godspot

can also help you retire, I mean, we are really checking, checking the boxes, you know, and here's the deal. I think that if you can find something, that you love that you're good at, that you have the opportunity to do, that you feel like I'll push on the planet to do, and you can have any kind of income from it.

It doesn't mean you become a millionaire. It doesn't mean that it has to even pay you right away. Almost nothing does at the beginning. I used to speak for free. But you do have to wonder, is there a path here, is there a model here, is there someone out there doing what you want to do and is making a living? If so, study that person. Study those people.

learn the business side of your gift, and that's what most people never get to. They're gifted, but they don't understand the economic side of their gifting. Because talent without a business model is just potential. And let's just be honest, potential doesn't exactly pay mortgages. So let me put this all together. Your sweet spot, your actual sweet spot is where all five of those boxes are checked. you're good at it and others agree you're passionate about it and it fuels you it doesn't drain you

you have or can create the opportunity to do it you feel called to do it like you were put on this planet for it and you can build a sustainable life doing it if you've got four out of those five listen you're doing really well

if you've got three I mean you got some work to do but I mean you're doing all right if you've only got one or two of those you might be living with career dysmorphia. Seeing something in the mirror that doesn't really match reality. So, my friend, I'm going to encourage you to do whatever you can to find your sweet spot, live in it, and stop apologizing for not being someone you were never meant to be. Hey, thanks for listening to the Ryan League podcast.

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