The Ryen Russillo Podcast - An Argument Against CFB Expansion. Plus, Josh Duhamel.

Episode Date: November 25, 2020

Russillo shares his thoughts on why expanding the College Football Playoff isn’t a great idea (2:00) before talking with actor-director Josh Duhamel about his new movie ‘Buddy Games’, his directorial debut, the real-life inspiration behind the film, maintaining relationships with childhood friends, Josh’s career, playing around with construction equipment, and more (15:00). Finally Ryen answers some listener-submitted Life Advice questions (59:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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It always brings its A game. When you want the real deal, like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Here is the plan for today on a Thanksgiving Wednesday. Josh Duhamel. 40-plus minute conversation. Excited about that one. Met him a couple times on different promotional things,

and so we're just going to talk about his new movie, The Buddy Games, out now. He's excited about that one met him a couple times on different promotional things and so we're just going to talk about his new movie the buddy games out now uh he's excited about it wrote directed starting it nick swartzen always a good time so that's coming up yeah we're going to take a little time off here from from all the other stuff and then life advice at the end but the college football playoff rankings are out and that's where today's open is. That's where I start. Rankings are out. Get mad, folks. Those are the rules. I've gotten mad at rankings. You've gotten mad at rankings. We all get mad at rankings. That's kind of why they're there for us to be mad at them. And you know, that's what it is. But the big one was BYU coming in at 14, right? As you're thinking, does BYU have a chance to maybe crash the playoff party? And the rankings come out and you're thinking, does BYU have a chance to maybe crash the playoff party?

And the rankings come out and you're like, wait, we're behind Iowa State, Oklahoma, Miami, and Georgia? How did that happen? And wait, Cincinnati's 7th and we're 14th? We're 9-0. So, BYU fans, I get it. You're upset. I know your arguments. I've heard them all.

Not specific to you, but I've heard them every year I've done this. I know everybody's arguments, even if it's not specific to the program, you're going to give me your arguments. And then there's the national argument of Washington offering you a game. And, um, I'd, I'd read a bunch of different things. I don't really know who to believe on this one. Um, it was basically Washington was going to ask for all these parameters. It was going to cost BYU money to follow the Pac-12 protocols. It wasn't really going to make a ton of sense. Then there was a part of it where BYU was like, why don't we just see where we are in the rankings first? Because if we're really high, then we definitely don't want to play you.

We'll just have other teams lose in front of us, perhaps. And then we'll be able to get in. And we called this weeks ago, even though I try to have an open mind about everything, because we were constantly surprised in sports and even more so. Well, actually, we haven't been surprised in college football a lot lately, but that's the point. Don't sit here and ever say, hey, these are all the things that are going to happen and none of it's going to change because it always does change. So I try to have that open mind about it. But when you started going through and looking at schedules and just looking at the math of less

games and weird starts and no non-conferences. It was going to be even harder to crash this playoff party, considering I think a couple weeks ago we felt it was seven, maybe eight teams tops that were still even alive for this. And now BYU doesn't feel alive at all because their schedule isn't any good. Their argument would be, yeah, so what, we're in the 70s, Cincinnati's in the 60s. Depending, we can find straight schedules all over the place. But I'll tell you this, It's 2020. Nobody cares anymore. Figure it out.

You may not want to follow certain protocols. Get a game. Find a game. Call up Cincinnati. Make it happen. You're the ones wearing the shirts and the headbands that say any place, any time, any team. Okay, let's go because it's the only way it's going to happen. What do you have to lose?

Losing out on a playoff spot that you're not going to get anyway? So go ahead and play somebody else because I know how mad you are about those 14 rankings. SEC guys. That's what I'll always ask too, is whenever I hear these arguments, I go, are you rooting for your thing? Are you rooting against geography? Because a lot of times you're just rooting against geography back in the day, going to the South, talking PAC 12. They think the PAC 12 is the big East with a bigger ocean. Whenever I'd look at like Michigan man right now, you're losing your mind. What are you rooting for?

Do you want Ohio State out or do you just hate the SEC or the fact that enough people haven't figured out you haven't won that many national titles, but you carry yourself like you're, I don't know, anyone, anyone good. And that's what happens a lot. You're like, oh, wait, wait, wait. Are you rooting? Like, what's your problem with the rankings?

Is it because your team isn't in it? Or is it because some other teams are in it and you're just mad about the whole thing? And that's the whole point. We just get mad. We get mad all the time. What's your philosophy of government when it comes to the college football system? I'm for a dictatorship. Okay.

I'm not down with an isocracy. I do not want everyone to feel like they have a chance when this is just different. Like we don't have balanced schedules or anything any close to it. And I've used this argument in the past, even with some power five schools. And we could sit here and say, it should just be the power five this way, the way it's going to be. I'd actually be okay with that. I just would be. I wouldn't have to hear from UCF all the time, making up shirts and acting like they won something because your path is easier. And if your path is really easy, but then you're put into this group for a chance to win a national championship, it should be hard. This is supposed to matter. Okay. This is supposed to be really hard to do. And, you know, even the Iowa example, I've always used the path, like their regular season. And when you watch them play through the course of that season, you're like, wait, you want me to argue that they're supposed to have a chance to play for a national championship? And hell, they almost did because they played Michigan State pretty well at the end of that season in the Big Ten. So I'm not even beating up on Iowa. mad lib the team. What's the resume? How have you looked? What's your strength of schedule? Where's your good win? What was your non-conference? And if all of those things are bad, then I don't want you in the playoff competing for a chance for a national championship. This shouldn't be sneaking in the back door to a party you weren't invited to. So this always leads to

when we have this problem, they got to expand this. You know what? We got to go to eight teams. Now, it does surprise me a little bit. Maybe it shouldn't that the conference commissioners, school presidents, everybody that was involved in these decisions just said, Hey, is there a way we can be kind of progressive, but also kind of fuck it up? Is there a way we could do that? So let's, instead of guaranteeing all five power five conferences here, redundant, a place at the table with a conference champion in the group, which I'm not even sure I'm for either. Because if you did this over 20, 30 years, we're going to start having NFC East type teams, maybe win a college conference where now all of a sudden they have an automatic birth. And, you know, I don't know.

I'm okay with it. But again, it kind of gets in the way of my dictatorship philosophy on college football. It's actually very classic college football that they would do that, that they would go, hey, we're sick of everybody, and this is exactly what happened. You go back and read all this stuff, and I remember while it was happening, the commissioner was just so sick of getting crushed by everybody for the BCS system and saying, oh, we only have two teams, and we're always leaving somebody out. We're doing this. All right, we need to expand it, but let's not expand it too much.

Let's make sure one of us gets screwed over in this room. Potentially two, if we have two teams from the same conference. Yeah. Yeah. Let's do that. Let's not be too progressive. And then Larry Scott's in the back going, is there any way we could have a eight team playoff office space in Manhattan, where it's just, that's the college playoff committee office, you know, I don't know, financial district. And if we could just kind of have a place to zone out West upper West side apartment, I've already found a place on Zillow. So just let me know who I should ask for the check. Okay. So people want eight because that's all we've seen now in sports is we just have more and more expansion. And by the way, I know very few people agree with me.

All of this extra expansion sucks. I don't want eight teams in the college football playoff. And I'll get to that in a second. Baseball, yes, 2020 applies. So we have to remind ourselves of that. They had 16 playoff teams this year. Did you know that? Now, growing up, yes, 2020 applies, so we have to remind ourselves of that. They had 16 playoff teams this year. Did you know that?

Now, growing up, yes, four from each league was probably low. We had 10 teams in 2019. I don't like the extra wild card game. I don't like when a team's like, well, we made the playoffs. I'm like, did you? The Twins in 2017 went 85 and 77 and make that second wild card slot. And now they're playing like technically in a playoff game. And I don't like that. You know, it's almost like the coach in college basketball that says, well, I made the tournament.

You're like, well, you were in one of the playoff games that I'm supposed to call the first round, but you know what the first round is to me? The first day of the actual tournament. That one I can't even keep track of. So we have 16 teams in the MLB this year. And again, COVID rules apply. We had two teams, the Astros and Brewers that were 29 and 31. So after 60 games, like, oh, by the way, you weren't even 500, but here's your playoff berth. Now they were trying to do this to salvage television money, salvage a product. That's what a lot of this stuff is, the motivating factor, but here's your playoff berth. Now they were trying to do this to salvage television money, salvage the product. That's what a lot of this stuff is, the motivating factor, but it's probably not going to go anywhere because even Manfred said, and I don't know what the latest latest on this is that we're probably going to have 14 teams in baseball.

So almost half of baseball. So we're going to go from 10 to 14 in just two years. And as much as I don't like the wildcard game, because you could win 90 games, be in the wildcard game. And then out after one game, after you just played 162, that seems to be kind of ridiculous. And again, I know that no one's with me on this. The NFL, we got an extra team now, of course, because of 2020. With 12 teams, we've had four times where a team had a losing record that made the playoffs. Two were from a very short season, so it hasn't happened a ton, but we may have it happen this year with the NFC East. Whether it's the division thing, that's fine, but why would we need to expand this to have an 8-8 team in there, a 9-7 wildcard tiebreaker team? You just played 16 games, you're a 500 team, and now you have a chance to play for a Super Bowl?

Maybe that's what you like. Maybe you like the single elimination part of that. Maybe you like that from the NCAA tournament. But the basketball example, I think, is a good one because now we're expanding that for the play-in tournament that everybody likes. But if I'm Dallas last year, I'm going, let me get this straight. I'm the seventh seed in the West. In a shortened season, I go 43 and 32. I'm seven and a half games ahead of Portland, the eighth seed, but I have to play an extra game or two to prove I'm in the playoffs. Why? Why am I doing that? Do you realize in the East, if you had had this expanded playoff thing, you would have a sub 30 win wizards still alive for a chance at the playoffs. To what?

Have your brains beat in by the one seed? Like, why don't we just play the 80 games? And that's what leads me back to the lack of expansion for college football. Yes, it's going to happen. Yes, it's about the money, stupid. All of this stuff is about the money. That's fine.

That's cool. Whatever. Because all advancements all work out. Instant replay has been fun as I'm hour four of an Auburn game on a Saturday going, look, I like Auburn skill guys, but I don't want to watch this for four and a half hours. Can we get it moving here a little bit on these replays? If you look at the college football playoff and the lack of parity that we've had, this is actually pretty remarkable because I was like, man, it seems like the same teams.

It has been. Six years of the college football playoff. We're on year seven now. Bama's been in five times. Oregon won. Florida State won. Ohio State three. Clemson five.

Michigan State won. Oklahoma four. But they never get shit on like Notre Dame does, who lost once. Washington, Georgia, and LSU. That's 11 teams in six years. I went back and looked at the last six BCS title games. Nine teams. Nine teams played for a national championship. Nine different programs, right? 12 slots, nine programs. 24 slots with the playoffs, 11 programs.

The reason I don't want expansion is simple. Let's just go back. I could do this every single year. Let's go back one year. I mean, hell, Seth Greenberg used to lose his mind after Virginia Tech would go 18 and 17 and not beat anybody good. He'd be like, I can't believe I didn't make it.

I can't believe I didn't get into the tournament. Maybe we did that three years in a row. We're like, get Seth up. Last season, if you go to the conference championship rankings, so that's week 16, everybody's got a conference championship under their belt. LSU's the one seed, Ohio State, Clemson, and then Oklahoma at 12-1. If we go to eight, that means we're going to start talking about teams like 8, 9, 10, and 11. No thanks to Utah.

Penn State, no. Florida, no. This is a perfect one. Wisconsin. Wisconsin would have been the eighth seed in an expanded playoff in 2019. So you're telling me Wisconsin, who's 10-3, hey, you know what? Nice season. Things worked out. It didn't quite go the way we wanted. Had Ohio State there in the first half. They're supposed to play LSU, who's put together one of the greatest single seasons in the history of college football.

LSU has to play another game against a team that lost three times and have an equal shot at getting to the final four, say, of college football. Everybody's down with that? You want that to happen? everybody's down with that? You want that to happen? Now, do you want it to happen because it gives you, selfishly, it gives you and your team a better chance to get in or because you think that's actually a better product? Because let's not kid ourselves. We both know what the answer to that is. Been looking forward to this for a while. Josh Duhamel joins us.

I've got to meet him a few times over the years. And the Bill Lee movie was really cool, getting a chance to go up to the premiere of that small little theater in LA. And we just started talking about this because I know you're friendly with Van Pelt as well, correct? Oh, yeah. I've known SVP for a while. He's one of my favorite people.

Yeah, he's a good guy. I think I have a good read on that with all of you. But you learned, I think you knew or maybe I just moved to L.A. when I first saw you. And then you're like, hey, you moved here. What's the deal? I think there's always this level where I know there's a certain person that if he reaches out to me, I'll be like, all right, what's his motivation here? And that's probably why I've hesitated to follow up with mutual friends and be like, what's Josh doing this weekend? So I'm being respectful of it, but I don't want you to think

that I, because there's like Vince Vaughn's a neighbor and we have a couple of mutual friends and guys like, if you run into him, I'm like, yeah, I've seen him, but I didn't run after him to go, hey, remember me from LSU? What's what's up man like remember remember the car wash go ahead did he go to lsu no he didn't but he's got a friend a friend of mine that i've known from the lsu stuff for over 10 years and it's it's like vince's right hand guy and so he'll the one weekend they were together he sent me a text he's like are you in you in Manhattan beach? I go, well, yeah, but I'm not there this weekend. He's like, Oh, I'm over Vince's. And it was like, that was tough. Cause you, well, I didn't, I didn't know that you had moved to LA. So that's good to know. We got to watch some football or something and I'm done now. So seriously,

we got to do that. All right. Sounds good. Sounds good. Yeah. So that's, um, that's the movie that's out. There's a lot of different stuff that I want to talk about, but Buddy Games comes out this week. This is great because it's like you became famous enough and powerful enough to just make a movie about you and your friends. Is that essentially what this is? Well, I wish I could frame it that way, but no, that's not the... I had to go through... You don't even know how many hoops we had to jump through

to get this thing even off the ground. The fact that we're here right now talking about the movie Out is nothing short of a miracle because, man, I mean, I've been doing this for a while now and I knew that it was a lot of work, but to have to go through it from the inception all the way through now

through the promotion has been one of the most difficult things I've ever done, but also one of the most, you know, it's been a huge learning experience and also one of the most fun things I've ever done, but also one of the most, you know, it's been a huge learning experience and also one of the most fun things I've ever done. And I'm proud of this movie as crazy as it is. I really am. I can't wait for people to see it. All right.

So give us the back story and then ultimately what the movie's about. So I have a group of friends, some of which I've known since kindergarten uh like we go that far back a lot of us you know grade school and then seventh eighth grade but we go way way back so these guys know everything about me and every year for the last 20 years or so we've done this buddy games this this weekend the third weekend of August where we get together and we play uh everything from ping pong to wiffle ball to golf to, you know, shooting each other with paintballs in our underwear and helmets. And, and, you know, we were 40 mid forties now and, and still, you know, revert back to that, that, that 15 year old self. And I think that's great. You know,

we're all still kids at heart and I think it's okay to let that, let that loose once in a while. Yeah. I probably shouldn't have said powerful enough because I think the one joke that I've learned out here is that once you understand the movie and television industry, you can't believe anything ever gets made. Yeah. From inception to like sales to, oh, we love this and all the bullshit of like, oh, this guy's attached,

this guy's interested. Once you're in it, you go, oh my, like how does, I can't believe any movies ever get made. Like it's crazy how hard it is. Yeah. The amount of horse trading and I had to do, you know, and you know, every, and every day, even, you know, before shooting during shooting and now after you're constantly, you know, you want something, but you can't get it. So you got to find a different way to get something similar. You know, it's like a, it's an, it's an ever moving target and you to make a good movie is so hard because there's so many things that have to come together.

You have to have a script, you gotta have a great cast. And then even afterwards, you gotta make sure that it's edited correctly and marketed. You know, there's just so many things. If one of those things falls off, you know,

the movie fails. So, uh, I understood that and I knew how hard it was going to be, but I didn't really quite understand the extent that I would have to go to get this thing done.

What was directing it like? That was the fun part. The directing was fun because even the prep, I love the prep. What I was scared of was, do I know what lens to put on the camera to get this kind of shot? I didn't know all that stuff. I wish I had paid more attention as I, you know,

as I came up and I do pay a lot more attention to that stuff now, but you know, I just made sure that I had a good group around me. I had a DP that I could, you know, tell him what I wanted and how he would help me figure out all the lens and whatever, you know, it was just, yeah, I knew enough to know that I didn't have to know everything. And so, yeah, the worst, the hardest part was the acting because there's so many other things going on that I'd forget that I had to go on camera next and I'd be like, Oh, okay. Uh, okay. Let's go. And so it's just a

completely different experience as far as being an actor for sure. Is it easy to remember your lines when you write it? Yeah. Yeah. And, and also I didn't, I didn't hold these guys. I mean, I didn't write scripture here. This was, this was, uh, I had guys that I knew could improvise and could, could, you know, play real and could also play comedy. And so I just gave them parameters,

just this is what we need to accomplish in this scene. Say the words or say something better. I don't care. Best idea wins. And that's really how my approach to it was, because that's what I love to be able to do. I follow the script, but I also like to be able to, if I have an idea, to be able to go for it. And that's what these guys did. Soartzen's in it who i've always loved i've loved his stand-up every time he's a character in something it's like a rewindable scene he just like i want to watch it again um we have a very limited dm relationship we were dming about i think a t wolves game one night so that was you know my did he ever pull you aside and go josh like this is cool and all you know my not but you know sandler usually like we're in hawaii and stuff

yeah he nick is the most fearless dude i've ever met you know this guy has zero shame and that's what we needed to play this the character he plays in this movie he's just absolutely fearless and shameless um but yeah i mean the guys worked with you know he's been doing this a long time too and he was actually the first one that came on board and and would champion this thing from the beginning so uh he's fantastic in this movie yeah he's just he's just great you know it's it's easy to say oh he's he's this crazy guy or he's wild but i mean there's some comedic beats that he'll have and all the stuff that he does you'd be like wait what did he just say like there was a stupid line i was watching the other day because

when i was prepping for this i got caught in a swartz and wormhole and he just had this dumb line and these people were like how are you feeling and he's like oh a plus and it was so stupid but he just thought of it and i I'm like, that's just funny. It's just funny to say, like, how are you? Oh, I'm A plus. And of course, it's him. But if you or I said that, we'd be different. Yeah, it'd be terrible. Some people get like this pass. He can say some stuff. You're like, I can't believe he just said that. If I said that, I'd get sued. But not Nick Swartzen. I don't know how he gets

away with it. I think you just have to be you. I have this theory about just anybody that's public and it's called the Charles Barkley theory where if you're Barkley long enough then it doesn't really matter what you say. They just accept it. So Barkley can say whatever he wants and everybody applauds him

because he was fearless enough to keep saying whatever he thought, but you just keep being you long enough. It's almost like everybody has to adjust to you eventually and some people actually find a way to do that. And I think it's very few people. Yeah, that's, that's very true. That's very true. I know a few people like that. And it's just like, wow, that take the balls it takes to say some of the things that comes out of your mouth. But you know what? You're right. Barkley, Swartzen is one of those guys. It's like, wow. I never realized Swartzen and Barkley had so much in common.

So for going home for you, I mean, you talk about where you're from. And I think it's always one of those things when you're from an area like the Dakotas and your connection to it and college and everything else. And I love the backstory of working. You were working for your father or you were working construction? I think it could have been. My stepdad, yeah. Stepdad, okay. My stepdad had a construction company, but I didn't really work for it. I mean, I did a few things, mostly sweeping

up the shop and stuff, but you know, from the time I, he married my mom in 88 and you know, all the way through high school, I never really worked for him, but it wasn't until I moved to California that I started learning how to run like equipment and doing actual construction work. Cause like I could have been really good at this by the time I came out here and probably made a lot more money, but, uh, yeah. But there's a pride there that is, I think whenever you're from somewhere that's small, there's just this different connection. Um, and it's constant for you and I know you have businesses back there and everything, but is there a part of that that made you more normal for this transition to something that's very, very challenging?

Like I always have this feeling that sometimes people from different parts of the country, even though they're not wired for the fast speed of an LA or a New York City in a way can be more successful because people are thrown off on just how, I don't want to say simple is the wrong word because it sounds insulting, but just kind of a real easiness to them that a lot of people in these industries don't have. Yeah, I think there is a lot of truth to that. I do give a lot of credit to my friends. I got this close-knit group of friends who keep you firmly planted on the ground. And if you go any wayward, you hear it. But, yeah, they're all supportive.

But they all, you know, they don't treat me any different than anybody else would. We get together, and I'm just one of them, you know. And so I love that because it does keep me accountable, and it does keep me grounded. And my family, you know. accountable and it does keep me grounded and my family, you know, and the people from North Dakota are very, um, sturdy, you know, there's, there's nothing, there's nothing fancy about it. They don't, they don't brag. They don't, you know, they don't get too high or too low.

And that's what I love about the people from where I'm from is that there's just, you know, there's an ease to them and they don't, they don't, uh, they don't make things more difficult or, or, or fantasize than they need to be. So the friend part of this, give me the break. Cause I know, and you've explained this before, there's stuff in the movie with the buddy games. That is not, there's some creative license here. Uh, I think you explained it once. It's like, look, we can't do two hours of go-kart footage to keep it realistic.

You know, like people forget like, Hey, write some stuff in there that actually is going to be worth watching for two hours so um give us a sense of some of the stuff that's real and then the extremes you take it to to make it a movie well the stuff that's real is is what we actually do is it's it's some years are more competitive than others we like it when it is because there's, there's actual brackets and you know, okay. You're on. How many guys is it? 20 every year.

It's 20. And you're that close with 20 guys from home. Yes. That's incredible. There's other guys that want to come, but you know, we have like a, there's like a,

there's like a, there's like a velvet rope, you know, not really, but you know, there are other guys that we could come, but there's just, you know,

there's, there's a core group that we've had. There's actually about 12 or 13 of us that are, that grew up together. And then there's a couple that have come on through the years, but, um, yeah, it's just, it's, it's game, it's regular games. And then there's always one or two really ridiculous ones. Like this year we had this paintball thing where you'd stand 20 yards back from a guy you had to stand there in his underwear with a helmet and his in his underwear in a nut cup and if you could hear the the of the paintball gun and if you flinched you lose a point and and depending on where you got hit in the body it you got points for shooting so i mean it's not

you know we're not we're not we're not going to win any Nobel Peace Prizes over here for, for, you know, anything we're doing for the world. But it is, it is, it is good. Conflict resolution, I bet. No, maybe. Who's keeping track of this while you guys are getting shit faced? so there's there is a point system um and we do we do reflect that in the movie there now the movie version of this is much more heightened we did take creative license for sure but the spirit of it is still there so it's like uh what do we have that did come out did you see the movie yet no no i'm just you gotta watch it tonight i'm gonna watch it don't worry it's really fun um it you know there's there's one there's one in particular it was probably the hardest You got to watch it tonight. I'm going to watch it. Don't worry. It's really fun. Um,

it, you know, there's, there's one, there's one in particular. It was probably the hardest thing in the movie to shoot too, is there's this, I saw this Japanese game show and they had this, this thing that was similar to this.

And so what we did is we put, we built this dome and inside the dome were six holes big enough for your head to fit through. And so these guys would, I've seen this clip yeah go ahead we have the socks strapped to the head and and i and i released this komodo dragon and the last one to keep their head above board wins and that's that's as good but it's hilarious because you know anybody watching that would be like i would never i could never no way

i would never do that and so there's that and there's just all kinds of crazy other antics that we did. There's a whole laxative scene where you got to pound a little bottle of laxative and get a girl to buy you a drink, get her on the dance floor and get her to kiss you on the lips. And if you can do that before you let loose, you win that competition. It's highbrow stuff, Ryan. it's highbrow stuff ryan right well see this is the thing that i did read some reviews i read a couple reviews and you know you're like did the person does it bother you when you read the review and you're like look does this person not get that what we were trying to do like we we weren't we weren't trying to go for you know like the oscar this year i didn't make this for some crotchety critic in new York City. I made it for normal people. I don't think I've ever had anything reviewed well my entire career. So I try not to listen. It does sting a little bit. But for me, I don't even watch it. If I see

something that wasn't reviewed well, I usually like it.'d like the inverse sort of reaction to what they did and so um yeah yeah and i knew going in that when when we wrote this thing we're gonna okay we're gonna get beat up but who cares it's a good time by the way that's that's not accurate because think like a dog was was highly regarded and i'm not i'm not being an asshole about it i was i was actually yeah i watched a couple clips of that and then i go how did people it did all right well that's their type of movie. People love dogs. You can't really lose with dogs.

It's like a mob mentality. They're all like a little clique, and they've never created anything. So they're angry. That's why they write. That's why they critique movies. And so I don't pay much attention to it. Hey, trust me. There's days where I'm't pay much attention to it. Hey, trust me, there's days.

All right. So go on Rotten Tomatoes folks and start voting away. We get, we got to get this up. I want to go back to, to what's, what you'd said, because, you know, I am very close. We're still a very big group of friends from college. I think it's pretty rare. You know on a 25-year run of normally we would get together. And it's a pretty incredible thing. And it makes me miss them at times because I've pursued so many other things. So for you, your buddies have probably invited you to all sorts of stuff. And then you're like, I actually have to get the Grammys. Sorry. There's probably been times where you've had to maybe work a little bit harder with your position to, to make sure that that relationship is still the same. I mean, how tough has that been? Yeah, I, there, there are things that come up, but they all understand. But at the same time,

I work hard to go see them because those guys truly keep me grounded. You know, that, that, that's sort of my compass in a lot of ways, because they're all great dudes. They're, they're, they're family're family guys they're you know there's most of them are successful some of them not as much but you know what they're all we're all just you know friends at the end of the day and i think that if you can have a group like that that sort of looks out for each other and that's really what this movie is about too is that you know everybody's had everybody has their ups and downs every you know and when one of us falls there the rest of us pick them up, you know?

And I think that that's what this movie really is about. That's the main underlying theme. And then all the hijinks that happened from that are just for fun. So when it first starts blowing up for you though, you go out to California and I know you've told this story a million times. So feel free to make it not as boring as you want to as a, you know, unfortunately I know everybody's fascinated with this. Oh, he played college quarterback and then he decides, you know,

I'm going to chase an ex-girlfriend out to California. I'm going to work. I'm going to do all these different things. But when it first starts to kind of take off, the first thing I would do is I'd want to come out and visit you and be like, is this amazing? Like, where are we going? Like, what are we doing? Are we going to the Vika room with Josh Duhamel? Cause he's on a soap opera. What were those early years? Like when you're like, Oh my,

like this is actually working out here. You mean as far as them coming to visit and stuff like that? Just, just you in that. Cause I don't care who you are when it's, it's not new money, but it's new fame. Yeah.

It's, it's going to fuck with you a little bit. Right. But it's also fun. We're all sort of in the, you know, on the joke together. They all know that I'm like, I don't know how I got here, but let's go, you know.

And they knew that I was just faking my way through it. So we all were kind of in on the joke together. And I did. I get to do a lot of really fun things, whether it's, you know, an NBA basketball game or, you know, a concert, whatever it is. You get a chance to do some really fun stuff. you know a concert whatever it is you get you get a chance to do some really fun stuff and i love to take them with me because it is that's part of the fun for me is to let you know my friends or family come in and enjoy with me so when you first like is is it the soap opera is it is it tad hamilton what's the first thing where you felt like okay like this is real and even though

these careers can be very delicate like this feels like it's really going to take off and this is who i'm going to be uh well i still haven't quite got to that point where i'm comfortable you still have it oh no man i still have to hustle hard uh because you're right it is a very delicate you know it can it can go as come as it can leave as quickly as it comes and and you got to keep pushing and but i do remember i mean i remember going walking down it was on all my children in new york city and i think bob was with me i forget who was with me but it was a couple of my friends and somebody asked for a photo and i was like what yeah i can take a photo with you they recognized me from this show and i I was just like, holy shit.

They, they, they, they, they see me on the, you know, it was just a complete, I'll never forget that. I think I still even have, it was like a Polaroid. I think some, I think one of us had a photo of it too, or something I forget. But, um, that was when it, I guess, first started. I had some success on all my children and then left that three years after three years and went to Las Vegas and, and then, uh, you know, started doing some movies and, you know, it's been, it's been good. I've been very blessed and I've been able to continue working. Um, and, and, you know, again, it's, you just never know. I just want to keep pushing. I would guess. And my thing is not nearly as cool as yours, but

if I take the big view, whatever cliche you want to use and step back and go, hey, look what you've accomplished. This is pretty incredible. The odds of this are extremely low, but I don't ever think that way. I'll always look at like, yeah, but look what this guy's got, or I heard about this new deal, or look at this opportunity way. Like I'll always look at like, yeah, but look what this guy's got. Or I heard about this new deal or look at this opportunity. And sometimes I'll think, well, you should just chill the fuck out. Or you go like,

if I did, then I wouldn't even be where I'm at now because I thought that way the entire way through. I think from the outside, people could look at Josh and say, Oh, you know, he,

why would, but do you look at other, you know, leading men and think, Hey, when am I going to get one of those roles? Yeah. I hate Ryan Reynolds, man. That guy just, no, I'm kidding.

I love him. I love him. And if I could trade with anybody, it'd probably be him. I just love that dude. Is this a tough question? I'm not trying to like... No, no, I'm trying to think. There are certain guys that are always, that you're trying, that's what I mean.

I'm always hustling. Right, because I don't mean it as like, oh, I'm trying to think of, there are certain guys that are always, that you're trying, that's what I mean, I'm always hustling. Right, because I don't mean it as like, oh, that guy deserves, but I'd imagine that's kind of how you're wired. Like, I think you have to almost be to even get to this point where, you know, I don't know if you go, I can't believe DiCaprio got that role. But, you know, I'm just wondering, like, do you have a ceiling for yourself? Do you feel like, okay, we're getting there or, you know? Yeah, and that's the beauty of being able to do this is it's not like a sporting career where after your mid thirties you're done and you got to sort of reinvent what your life is going to be. This is something that you can continue to, to work at and get better and better. Um, and that's what I'm trying to,

truly, I believe that if the work is good, you'll continue working. And if you show up for people, and if you, you know, you're not a dick, uh, that keeps you in the game. But then it's about like, you know, bettering your game. For me, I'm just constantly trying to get better at it. Uh, the, the other thing that I would say is that coming out, I didn't, if you have a backdrop, if you have a plan B, I wouldn't necessarily recommend that if you're, if you're trying to pursue a career in this business, you have a plan B, I wouldn't necessarily recommend that if you're trying to pursue a career in this business. You have to be all in with no safety net. Otherwise, you'll probably end up taking that safety net. So for me, I left, I was going to go to dental school. I got my degree in biology. I was going to go to dental school. That's what I told my mom

I was coming to California to do. But I was really just sort of coming out here to see if I could, you know, dip my toes in the water and see what happened. And, you know, secretly sort of pursued this career. And then, and then sort of the whole, I just kind of forgot that let the whole dental school thing go. So then I had nothing else. It was like, what am I going to do? I can't, you know, I can barely log onto my computer. I'm not going to get a job doing anything, you know, where it takes, you know, any kind of talent. I need to go do something else. So this was it. This was it. And it's still it. So I still have that same mentality that I have to

keep pushing and keep, you know, making opportunities for myself. And that's, I think the mentality that you kind of have to have if you're going to try to go all the way. Yeah. The safety net thing I hear all the time. It's like the only way it's going to work is if it's the only way it's it, it's just, it's just not going to work. And if you're sitting there, you know, checking up on dental school applications, then maybe, was there a moment early on where you go, Hey, this isn't going to work. Like, what am I doing? I'm out. Yeah, of course. Of course. I did some modeling early on and I was so bad at it. I was like about a year of that. And, and I was like, what am I doing? This is a dead end, man. I'm not. Is it because in person you're not as good looking?

Huh? Is it because in person you're not as good? I'm wearing a lot of makeup right now. Uh, no, but it was, you know, it was just something that I was never comfortable with. I wanted to go. I needed to have something to do. And how I sort of transitioned from that quickly, I needed to, or I was going to definitely have to go another route, was I started taking these commercial acting classes

and had to convince the agent that I was with, the modeling agent that I was with, I was like, let me go audition for this. Like, no, no, that's for actors. I was like, okay. Now I've this. Like, no, no, that's for actors. I was like, okay. Now I've had this, that fire, I'll show you. And so they were typecasting you as a model who wasn't even good enough to be in commercials. Right. Right. At first. And then, so then I, you know, I, I'm a bit of a,

I'm not much of a rule follower. Uh, and so I like to, you know, and I've always sort of had a chip on my shoulder and I think that that's, that's sort of fueled me to prove that I wasn't just that. And as you know, it's kind of been my whole mantra all the way through is just to, there's the people that I, you know, I would need to prove things to, you know, I don't know how healthy that is. I should probably talk through that with some therapists, but, um, but yeah, it's just that, you know, there's um, but yeah, it's, it's

just that, you know, there's a, there's a competitive fire for sure that you have to have. Hey man, I look, I, I get it. And I think it's probably why you're sitting here now. I mean, I don't, I don't think there's any way you get to this part of your story without having that where you're like, I can't, I'm only a model. Like, give me a break. Yeah.

You know, who else is highly competitive? Bradley Cooper. I've played, we have, we have some mutual friends,x dax shepherd i met bradley through dax shepherd who's in this movie and i remember playing we were shooting we were shooting when i met dax in a movie called when in rome and with with k bell kristen bell and and bradley came to visit and we were at we're at the director's house when I had this ping pong table. And that dude was so competitive when it came to ping pong. I was like,

that's why he's, he's, you know, he's a Philly kid. He's a tough, he's got, that dude's got edge. And that's to me why he obviously is super talented,

but it's that edge that he has that is making him so successful. In my opinion, I have a friend who wrote a feature and met with him and he's like, you'd be perfect for it. He's like, you're just not, you're just not a leading guy right now. It's before he'd blown up. And apparently Cooper was like, yeah, no, you're right. Like I'm just not at that level. Well, he is now. Yeah. I don't know if you'd call it back. Okay. What, this is kind of funny. i just interviewed cole hauser recently okay and i don't know if you know him at all um but i i watched some of his interviews and i was like man he

doesn't seem to enjoy this process all that much but then i was watching just all between you and him this week i was watching all these different things that you do to promote it. And most of these interviews, I'm not trying to be that, but they're so bad. And, and I get how almost, I would think on your side of the industry, you just go, here we go again. Like, I'll give you an example, right now, granted it's KTLA, which I can't believe now that I live out here, that's a real thing. Um, some of those shows and some of the people on, like I, you constantly think it's a skit, which is why Saturday night live has made fun of it so often. So it's Cole Hauser and then his love interest in Yellowstone played by this actress named Kelly. Um, and in one of the first episodes, it may even be the pilot, you know, she's naked and she gets in a horse trough and, you know, she's, she's just showing

how wild she is. The, you know, clearly the pilot is introducing everybody's characters and they wanted to show all this dramatic part of it because i really like the show and so hauser who probably wasn't that into it to begin with they're doing a side-by-side zoom which makes it even worse with everything that's going on now and then back at ktla studios it's it's an older anchor and he's like okay kelly i'd like to start with you he's like you know brad uh who works on our show is a huge fan of you and that scene in the horse trough and that was it there was no question it was just like hey horny brad really said go so the reason i need to bring that up is how often when you do these promotional things where you go that was worth it and I'm not trying to hope that happens here, but I just, there's, it's just, there's no way it should be consistently as bad as it is.

And it just, I know it's part of it, but it's just weird how bad people are at asking the questions consistently. Well, yeah. And you're, you're, you don't fall into that category by the way. But, uh, but yeah, it often depends on how interested they are in you or the project. You can usually tell pretty quickly if they don't like the movie by how crappy the interview is because they don't really have anything interesting. Like, so what are your plans like for Thanksgiving? And they sort of avoid the elephant in the room. But if they're into it it it makes it much easier you know

and and and you know for me too if i'm into the project it's easy to talk about all day long the problem with these junkets and and this is they they are painful at times because you're doing them all day long every day for a couple to three days it becomes very repetitive and if you feel like they get stale if you feel the actor or the reporters stale it's probably because they've been doing it for six hours straight or something yeah that's the other thing is that the the efficiency of it doesn't make any sense it'd be like asking somebody to play in a football game for like two straight days and then you're just like hey i'm not gonna be all there i don't even know what i just said in my last interview i i gotta imagine too like and i'm i'm not there i don't even know what i just said in my last interview

i i gotta imagine too like and i'm i'm not really even trying to but because of you and and your personal life like how how weird is it because your personal life has been out there so much that people feel comfortable just hey you know joining us now it's josh and you know he's here for this award show so tell us about your personal life. That's going to suck. Well, I learned a lesson with my last relationship. And it wasn't anything that I could really control. We were a very public couple. And before I even knew what was happening, it was just out there. And you're right,

I didn't like it. And I'm in a relationship now and I keep it very private because I don't need people to know. And I don't want to put her through that. And I don't want to put my son through it. I try to keep him out of it as much as I can too. I'm not super strict about that. If there's something funny and I think it's worth showing or whatever, I'm not like, no cameras on my son at all. Yeah, right, yeah, right. Cause that's the other thing is that everybody's it's almost accepted, but I could see how you guys are like, no, I kind of want to keep it private. But then it's like, well, if I just shut off everybody to me, then am I doing this right? You know, like it's a really tough balance when I think you're at a guy like yours level. Yeah. You know, there needs to, you need to maintain some level of privacy

so that they buy you in whatever role you're playing. You know, I don't want them to know everything about it. That's why social media is tough for me. I don't like to post. I always feel like I'm giving a little bit of my soul away every time I post something. Um, but at the same time, it's one of the necessary evils in today's you know world so uh you know it's all about just striking a balance everything in moderation including moderation like bill lee said you were great in that by the way and what i loved about it is because it was independent and you guys really kind of get to flex a little bit more um if you want to give me so i don't get any of this wrong feel free to interrupt but you know i don't know how many people saw it. You were great as him. You were very relaxed, even though he's such an odd character. I have

some odd connection to him because the back when I was bartending in Vermont, before anything happened for me, I lived above a restaurant where the owner of the restaurant was best friends with Bill Lee. So Bill Lee was in Craftsbury, Vermont, and he would hang out with this owner of the restaurant all the time. And the stories were legendary. Yeah, I can imagine. Yeah, and you play him. And I imagine most any actor wants some of those more dramatic roles to kind of show some things off. Like you're great in Transformers looking like an action hero.

But does the actor always kind of want to drift towards, let me do the artsy thing, even though it doesn't pay the bills as well? Yeah, for sure. I mean, it's just fun to, I mean, that's why I do this. You get to make, play make-believe. And, you know, a guy like Bill Lee is such an eccentric character. There's no way I could really do him justice as hard as I tried. But, but yeah, it was a fun character to play because the guy is just a complete free spirit. He lives in Vermont, right? I, yeah. I don't know if he's there year round,

year round, but Craftsbury is actually a really funny story. I don't know that I've ever shared it before, but when I was a senior in college, we'd heard that if there was a sex education class at UVM, right. It was so stupid. Um, but I shouldn't say that because the professor was terrific, but it was basically like, hey, everybody takes this class. But then later on, you could be a TA and you would have these younger groups of students come to your house and you would just kind of talk about. I mean, it's kind of crazy. Like, I can't believe we're saying this now. Talk about what?

Like their sex lives and just, you know, where it's actually, as I say this concept out loud, it's insane. Don't you have to have some kind of a medical license to do that? No, back then you just had to be a senior who had already taken the course. So you would just go through and it was another three credits to be a TA and you really had to fuck it up to like not get a good grade in that. So that's why a bunch of us did it. And so a bunch of us went into the, this, this TA program, but we had to go on a retreat. And so a bunch of us went into this TA program, but we had to go on a retreat.

And for that weekend, we had to sign all these papers that we wouldn't drink or we wouldn't do anything. I think every guy brought his own handle to this lake. And we spent three days in the wilderness of this little hippie compound in Craftsbury, Vermont. And we all learned about each other over these three days. And then one of my friends who's from Boston was making Jack and gingers in the bathroom the entire time. And he was getting so mad because a bunch of the other kids had no idea that like five of us were drinking the entire

weekend. And he was like, I'm going to kill that kid if he keeps taking the ginger ale. So anyway, that's where Bill Lee lives. And it's this beautiful lake. We did the whole canoeing thing. Unfortunately, one guy had the rope swing deal where, you know, sometimes guys that are really heavy and don't do arms do the rope swing. The physics of it don't really work out. So he ate a bunch of canoes. Again, this is a long time ago. I'm not even sure of the story. It might be the lowest point of the podcast at this point.

But I just know where Bill lives. And I know that it was like in the morning people would be walking around kind of these mini Stonehenge things, like pointing up to some spirits. So I think Bill fit in perfectly. And that sounds awesome. Actually. That story went a different direction than I expected it to. Well,

there's, yeah, I love, I love getting out there in the woods and just sort of, I don't know. It's a, it's a bit of a spiritual experience for me. That's why I love going to my cabin.

Now the cabins, what Minnesota, Minnesota. Yeah. Yeah. I just don't know that area all that well. I've, I've been lucky enough to be invited to a few compounds there in Montana. Oh yeah. And that's, yeah. I don't know if you spend any time.

Minnesota is very woodsy, very late, a lot of lakes, as you know, land of 10,000 of them. But yeah, that that's that's sort of my sanctuary i love getting out there and just digging in the dirt would you rather live there than la yeah yeah right but for sure probably wouldn't get as many roles no no no but i do plan to spend more and more time there is i actually built a cabin out there this year it's almost done i had these two little spots these two little like shacks basically that sort of made into they're livable now but i never could never have any more than like three or four people out there at a time so i actually built a cabin this year and it's and it's uh it's just the best man i love this sounds like a sequel to

the notebook or something should Should Gosling be worried? It's a great, you know what it is, it's a great respite for COVID. Are you building it or did you design it? God, man. Like I said, I can barely turn on my computer. So what's this rugged construction guy? I'm a good grunt laborer. And I'm good on tractors and excavators and things like that. Bobcats? Are you going to get a bobcat out there?

I've got a couple of bobcats. I've got a bobcat tractor and I had a tool cat that I'm trading in for the little skid steer, the track skid steer. I told my friends if I got to like a real level of fuck you money, I would have a place somewhere and I'd buy a bobcat with every single accessory and I would just have a little stretch of dirt that I just work on and it doesn't nothing I would just I would tear off the top and then just kind of like get it in a little bit and then move around and be like are you

actually doing anything I'm like I'm just working on my area yeah but that's but that's it's addictive man have you ever been in a bobcat oh yeah yeah oh my god I love them I sit there and play on that thing for hours and and just moving stuff that shouldn't be moved no i'm developing i'm like clearing stuff i'm building you know mostly just clearing because i'm building this big grassy area and i'm you know there's there's so many trees and so many rocks and you just can't there's a million things to do and i think that's why i love it as just i go there and i'm never without something to do yeah Yeah. No, I love, I really like where I live now. And I hadn't really done much in Connecticut

because I always thought I was going to move. So I didn't really invest in anything. I didn't really, you know, think about, hey, this is my forever house. But where I live in Manhattan Beach, like you don't even think of having a yard. That's something I definitely miss because growing up,

we were constantly working on that stuff. All right, let me finish up here with a few things. So one of the reasons I brought up that whole dumb ktla story was that what are the things that you're definitely really sick of being asked about one of the things i'm sick of being asked yeah the most and we'll leave the personal stuff out because i don't want to keep going down that road i'm just talking about like whenever anybody does the ashton kutcher thing are you like like, Oh, you read Wikipedia. One question that I hate is when they say, so tell me about all the pranks you guys played on each other on set.

It's like, there's not really that many pranks. I mean, there are, but it's no different than, you know, anybody else. So you got to come up with some like crazy prank.

It almost feels like when you're on set, it's like, okay, we should do a prank here so we can talk about it when we're promoting the movie. That's the one question that always drives me crazy. Cause I never have a real answer. You should just make a fake one up.

That's what you got to do now. I will. Yeah, I will. Trying to think of a good one. I'm not wearing any pants right now. You want to see? I'm kidding. I personally don't care, but that'll end up being the breakout for this.

I meant to tell you too, that's some bad news, at least for one of my friends who is female. She's like, wait, you're interviewing him today. I was like, yeah, she's like, find out his deal. So I think we just found out your deal. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know how to follow up on that with her, but I tell her, thank you. Yeah. I think she's going to be a little disappointed, but I think we can all understand. All right. So let's, let's finish this way. What is the thing that you hope in like a couple of years where you say, all right, this is what I did. This is the kind of movie I was in. This is the kind of person I worked with this kind of role.

Like what's the thing that you want to do that you haven't done yet? Well, this was one of them. I mean, these are my favorite types of movies. These, you know, the fairly brothers, Todd Phillips, Judd Apatow type movies. I just love, I love those movies where they go, they really push the envelope what would I like to do I want to continue directing for sure I really really enjoyed it

I love the idea of being able to sort of craft and shape a story you want to tell but it probably won't be something as crazy as this it'll be something in a different there's, there's a, there's a,

there's a script that I read about this, uh, this female pitcher back in the thirties that struck out murderers row. Uh, well, she was there when she was the one. And after that, she sort of got blackballed and that's what started,

you know, that's where a league of their own came from. There's a great story about that, that I'd, I've been looking at. That would be really fun. I knew about that as a little kid. Cause you always heard about this woman who struck out babe ruth yeah jack mitchell yeah um so you know something like that i'd just like to keep doing this and

just you know i never really know uh by the way ryan that's one of the questions that i can't sound like what do you want to do next like i don't know you just asked one of them i'm kidding no i kind of was like yeah because i really yeah honestly i never really know because you didn't tell you read it and it speaks to you in some way uh i don't know i just i you know i just do you read scripts and it's like less than 10 even remotely interesting to you 10 of% of the scripts? Yeah. Do you spend a lot of time on it? Like, tell me about that part of it. Yeah, I mean, I look closely at all, you know, the ones that come through.

And I would say about one in 10 are something that you are really attracted to. Not the other ones are bad. It's just you may not be feeling, like, I would suck in that role, or that's not for me, or... Yeah, Dr. dre straight out of compton not a good yeah i couldn't i couldn't play dr dre uh i i played uh the detective in

the biggie tupac thing and i tried i love because i read the book too by that that officer well yeah i loved it too it was it was it was good but you know i auditioned for biggie but i ended up getting greg katingading. So you don't win them all. I like that you're challenging your range. I do. But I don't think that that would have gone over well. I think one of my favorite fake social media things was that Brad Pitt was going to play Bob Marley in a biopic. And Twitter, I mean, people thought it was real because there was a picture of Brad Pitt with dreads.

And they're like, are you serious? This is happening. Serious. People were upset. But the picture is incredible. Like, I think it's so the picture is so great because he's dressed like Bob Marley with extensions in. It looks like it's a real promotional photo for this upcoming movie. And then it was it was taken so seriously that people started writing

columns about it and why yeah and you're like whoa um okay buddy games available now josh dumel honestly uh of all the guys over the years he's been the most genuine uh whenever we had him with espn and doing all these different things and the chance to hang out a little bit at that premiere man it meant a lot so it's really cool that you were able to spend the time with us here too. So let's connect again. All right. Of course. Of course. Let's hang. Done. I'm free. I'm free for things. No, I'm just kidding. You want details? Bye. I drive a Ferrari 355 Cabriolet. I drive a Ferrari 355 Cabriolet. What's up?

I have a ridiculous house in the South Fork. I have every toy you could possibly imagine. And best of all, kids, I am liquid. So now you know what's possible. Let me tell you what's required. Kyle, what'd you think of DeMille? You mean DeHammel? Dude, so just so the listeners understand, this is one of my, I can't stop doing it now.

I was texting with Van Pelt going, hey, we had Duhamel on. So Kyle was like, hey, Josh Duhamel is going to, and I went, what? I go, wait a minute, do you mean Duhamel? So you didn't, you're super locked in on his career then is what you're telling us. Well, I knew who he was forever and I knew, I kept confusing with Timothy Oliphant. Do I not know how to say that guy's name either? But do you have anybody that you just said their name wrong forever? And I've got a last name that people butcher all the time.

So I'm just wondering if you know at least where I'm coming from. I do. I do. I'm trying to think of who it is. Dude, Oliphant's a good call. I hope we're pronouncing that one right he played the really good salesman in the office that yeah he he was the guy that had to figure it out he's the one that dumped pam was like peace like he thought she was annoying um whoa dude googling oliphant he is a vanderbilt oh must be nice did you ever want to be a vanderbilt or a rockefeller or roosevelt like the guild just the old school no what do you mean like just like one of america's you know

what i'm talking about what do you mean yeah he what do you have a roommate when you say he's a vanderbilt what do you mean like i don't know i just heard it like my i think old people get really excited about that i remember like i used to think we knew the kennedys when i would talk to my grandmother and then i was like oh wait we don't know him i was like oh just irish irish people are obsessed with the kennedys and the Northeast thing is part of it. And my father's family being from Providence. So yeah, growing up and I'm talking like a little kid, like I wasn't an idiot in high school being like, Oh yeah, JFK. Yeah. It was a tough day for us. Um, but yeah, I had a roommate that was a Vanderbilt. That was his middle name. So I, but I don't really know

what it means. Like, I guess people are supposed to be really excited and we could sit there and say like oh it's it means you have access to all this money i don't know like people have been around now for a while you get a few hundred years under belts here i mean so michael creighton's not uh his his family's not returning my calls so i don't know are you related no not at all not at all but see that's that's how you could be a vanderbilt be a nobody at the same time you You know what would be just a move? It's just to start naming your kids with middle names. Because that was the deal. The guy that we knew, his middle name was Vanderbilt.

And guys were like, he's a Vanderbilt. I'm like, okay, but what am I supposed to do now? I'm 18 and I don't care. What's the next thing that's supposed to happen? Again, I think that's an older person deal. Well, you obviously write your whole name on job applications at that point, right? Yeah, how does that come up?

Well, you start going by Ryan V. Russillo, and it's like somebody has to ask you, what's the V for? It's like, oh, it's Vanderbilt. Yeah, because the other thing rich people do is they'll do like family names that don't really make any

sense in the flow of the person's full name. So they'll do a middle name where it's I don't know, like it just it won't make like the Huxtables. It's like another last name. Yeah, Kyle Huxtable Crichton. Yeah, and they'd be like the Huxtables, you know, it's like another Kyle. Yeah. Kyle Huxtable Crichton.

Yeah. And he'd be like, wait a minute. What's, what's that? Like, Oh, it's,

it's a family name. It's a family name. I think everybody should start doing it. Seriously. That way. Just these old school, rich blue blood, uh,

families start watering it down. Yeah. Just everybody. I've changed mine. Flood the market. Ryan Kennedy, Rosillo. Oh my God.

Are you a Kennedy? Yeah. In a way. You just, my grandmother was, was really into him. Okay. Life advice.

You get a couple of good ones here today. People wanted an all life advice you get a couple good ones here today people wanted an all life advice podcast i don't know that's like the christmas cop out well i guess now we have nba that's not the that's not the case but no i mean we could do one but then that would mean you'd have to edit it kyle and i don't you got thanksgiving plans i'm working on Thanksgiving. I'm just paying out. Oh, you are? I've got to do those million-dollar picks, Bill Simmons. Should we just do five life advices and see what the numbers are for Friday? No. I'm going to say no to that one.

We're already off. You know why, though? It's a bad idea is because we don't want to give you too much. Because I think I'll get sick of myself by the third one whenever i do three then i'm it's like medicine you don't take you don't take a tylenol right medicine i'm going to compare it more towards you know what i love is a good coffee cake but i never buy it i just don't want it around the house when you're by yourself you know those kinds of things like in your room i don't know that i don't know that i go to that level but i saw one the other day i was like man that looks great like what the hell are you going to do with that buy it and then you can't be like

the weird single guy in his 40s handing out coffee cake to the neighbors so you know what i did do yesterday though is i sold something online well what was it it was uh i had a squat rack from rogue and i sold it why because you feel like we're coming out of this pandemic it took you like forever to lock that thing down no no it's not because i think we're getting out of this it's because i wanted to upgrade with a different um different deal so rogue this stuff is amazing but it's it's not easy to find so i was looking for a fair price, but I didn't want to negotiate. And the last time I tried to sell anything was when I was moving from Connecticut and I listed all my furniture online.

It's all restoration hardware, all good stuff, no kids, no pets. I'm in one room. I don't think I went in for six years. So that stuff was still up to date. So I put fair but stern prices down and then all of a sudden you got people showing up to your house walking through it critiquing your shit and i'll never forget the asian couple that came in and started speaking to each other in a foreign language i don't want to assume what language it was um but it was pretty offensive you're like hey are you

serious like you guys are sitting there, like, bitching about my furniture while I'm sitting here watching you guys, and now you're doing it? Did they buy? Would you ever? Yeah, imagine if you didn't speak a foreign language and you went to go look at somebody's furniture and then you were in your house

and you were whispering to your wife so that the person who owned the stuff couldn't hear you, but they were doing it right in my face. Incredibly rude. Did they buy it? No, they didn't buy anything. Nothing. So at the end, I was kind of like, all right, you it right in my face. Incredibly rude. Did they buy it? No, they didn't buy anything. Nothing. So at the end, I was kind of like, all right, you know, you guys can get out of here.

You guys can get out of here. Because they just kept walking around arguing with each other. And I was, that was a pretty short fuse because I was like, oh, okay, we're doing this. All right, get out of here. So it didn't work out. I think I sold one piece, one sectional. And then, of course because i'm jacked i have to move everything for everybody uh and so this time i was like i don't know i

don't know if i'm going to be able to do this i don't want people coming to my house all this different stuff i put it on craigslist it sold in like two hours guy drove down i disassembled it for him helped him load it up that was nice and i i kept putting firm don't ask for extra stuff it's not happening there's no there's no extra stuff don't show up here i mean i wasn't like freaking out in the ad and it worked out and then i spent all night building the new one so i'm uh i felt awful last night my body was just going, what, what was, what was today about? What are we going to,

we're going to do this in the future more often. So I don't know. The new one isn't level yet though. I got to figure it out. I got to get in there with a level, maybe some shims. Okay. In case you guys are wondering what I did the last 24 hours,

but I'm really proud of myself for posting something, selling it that quickly, no hassle done and done. Because that stuff scares the hell out of me. Last thing I sold online was a GPS, a Garmin. How'd that go? It was hot.

Got like nothing for it. Wait a minute. You had stolen goods that you were moving? I felt dirty, but one time. When you're 17, how are you going to make money? Oh, I thought this was last week.

No, the only time I ever sold anything online was a Garmin. So it was a while ago. Yeah, I think you've passed the statute of limitations on that one. But I like that you were so honest about it. But as you started that story, I'm like, why is he admitting he stole a garment last week on this podcast i'm not saying i stole it i'm just saying it was hot you knew you knew it was right i'll leave it at

that all right fair okay here we go um it doesn't want to yeah no kidding you don't want us to read your name on this one okay long story short my little bro met a girl at the beach this summer, COVID dating, but it worked out. He moved out west a few years ago and came home to spend the summer at the beach. Okay, so I'm assuming this is an East Coast location. We met her at the end of the summer, and it turns out I know her. How? Well, I dated, hooked up with this girl over 10 years ago.

It wasn't the time or place to blurt that out at the beach, obviously. I told my wife driving home. I think it's cool that you and your wife are at that level because some people just can't talk about the other person's past at all. So that's kind of cool. Um, so it has nothing to do with the email compliments to you and your wife. We decided at that time to not tell little bro and give the girl the opportunity to disclose this juicy factoid. We chose poorly fast forward a few months and she's not told him he's moving back east in no small part because of her now some context

little bro has been single for a long time he's got some notches on the old belt far more than your humble narrator here mathematically the scenario happening was quite low he's also more than likely to fuck the relationship up more context i met the girl many years ago feels like a different lifetime yeah i get it i mean now you're married and whatever you're older 10 years is 10 years was definitely a rebound for me she was super young and i had been dumped and was not in a good place as far as wanting to settle down at that time um was i a huge douche probably not but also wasn't a perfect gentleman. All right, look, don't, I mean, unless you're not being honest with us, you met somebody, you're in a weird spot, you hooked up,

you blew the person off. Um, you've probably been blown off too. So just because now that's a weird kind of math deal where you go, Hey, no one cared about me when I was on the other side of it. So I can't put the other person's feelings ahead of my own in a current situation. So, hey, no one cared about me when I was on the other side of it. So I can't put the other person's feelings ahead of my own in a current situation. So don't worry about that. Now, here are three scenarios. She doesn't remember. I don't know if she's a disaster, maybe. Probably not, though. She probably remembers. And how can you not figure out in the times? I don't know if you've had any personal interaction with her.

Normally you can tell within seconds when you look at the person's eyes that you go, Hey, how's it going? That would be a tough one to have a poker face on. Okay. So she doesn't remember, but then he says parent parentheses here.

I mean, come on, not because I'm Dirk Diggler, but there's no way she doesn't remember too many specific things for her not to remember, but maybe no she definitely remembers again unless she's a total disaster okay she doesn't want to fuck it up by telling him the most likely scenario or scenario three the lifetime movie scenario she's been plotting revenge on me for years and this is a master plan in retrospect i should have told him immediately don't want to get into too

many specifics but it's been a rough year in my bro's relationships that will likely end in disaster. It was not a proper time. All right, so here, let me just say the sentence in English. He doesn't want to get into many specifics, but it's been a rough year, and my brother's relationships that will likely end in disaster was not a top priority for me. It was awkward as hell, and as time time went on it got harder to tell him it feels like this is a uh waspy version of an ed burns movie what should i do uh all right we'll leave that part out okay um oh man i let me just try to be your brother here for a second okay because here's what i would do

i don't have an older brother. I have a younger brother. Uh, I have two younger brothers, but, um, if I were in a scenario where I don't even know if older or younger matters at this point,

uh, if I were getting ready to marry this girl and I knew she slept with my brother or I found out after dating her for a year or two, I would, I would go fucking crazy and it would be unfair, but there's just no way I'm walking down the aisle with, with someone that slept with my brother. I'm just, you know, I'm not real complicated. That's just going to be a rule for me. All right. So I can't, I couldn't do it. So you gotta to, you got to figure something out. You got to talk to her and go, Hey, look, what do we do here? So yeah, I look at it this way. I think the, the problem with it is you can't never tell him. You can't never tell him.

So it feels like if this is the one and it all works out and he's moving back there, do you go, hey, what's better? Him being happy and there's this secret this whole time and if no one ever finds out. But you don't know that. You don't know if they're going to get into a fight in five years from now, a huge argument,

and she's like, hey, by the way. And then that whole time, you've never done that. And it appears you have a good relationship with your brother and you care about him. So if you care about how your brother feels, don't do corporate management here where it's, I'd rather lie to you now and have you be super pissed off later than deal with confrontation today. That's how I've been managed in almost every corporate thing I've had, which is basically one. So it's not hard to guess which one that is, but it's like, Hey, should we tell Rosillo? No, let's not.

Let's let them get wicked pissed off at us like a year from now. Oh, good idea. So, um, yeah, you got got to tell them i think you have to tell them maybe some of you guys listening now disagree i just i think you got to tell them unless it's like a surefire this thing is gonna not last another couple weeks which it sounds like that's not the case you should probably tell them yeah right like i get what you i i completely understand all of your decisions here i don't think you're necessarily doing anything wrong you're like hey whatever no big deal he's he's kind of dating off and on i don't need to tell him and then i think you got to make sure i don't know what she's going to say what if she says

no and then you still have to tell him and then they get married and your brother hates you and his wife hates you even more this is not easy tough being so hot man okay this is uh this one's interesting okay this is i'm leaving name out on this one too okay uh he goes over some nba stuff here that's not relevant okay he's like here's my question. Every March, my fiance goes to a Buddhist retreat in India for a couple of weeks. He, uh, early March this year, the retreat was canceled, but I still push her to go to India because the flight was non-refundable and it's cheap and quick to fly from India to Kathmandu, her favorite city. Selfishly. The reason why I pushed her to fly was because I planned a guy's trip to Tulum that same

time and wanted to extend my trip to shoot a short film with some local actresses. Okay. Uh, if she would have stayed home, I probably wouldn't be able to swing the two weeks in Tulum. Of course, what happened was she got stuck in Nepal, which is landlocked and that actually locked everything down, closed all borders. And she was stuck there unable to fly back to the U S until starting September. Holy shit. So again, she went early March and she was going to be stuck there until September. The plan was for her to fly back in September, but she kind of sprung on me the last minute. She visited an orphanage there that was really in bad shape with the kids not eating well and lacking school supplies. So she wanted to stay and help turn the orphanage around. At first I was upset because I was looking forward to seeing her, but I also don't want to sound like

an asshole and prevent 13 orphans from getting better education and food. Well, congrats to you, man. So I told her I supported her. Okay. She then told everybody that her fiance said she could stay longer. But after I had time to think about it, I realized I was not happy with the decision. If we were going to get married, why wouldn't she want to get back to her fiance as soon as possible? I haven't gotten it in for six months. If we were going to get married, why wouldn't she want to get back to her fiance as soon as possible? I haven't gotten it in for six months. Okay. That's sex.

It was really struggling. Plus I was stuck taking care of her blind and deaf dog. Is this one real? This one. There is a couple of things in this one. That's, that's a good point. Yeah.

At the dog sentence, I'm like, I don't know. Okay. Let's move. Let's keep moving as if it were real. On the other hand, it's not like she was staying longer to just do yoga or read books on the beach.

She was actually raising a lot of money and busting her ass to help this orphanage. And you don't get to have sex and she's helping 13 orphans? What an asshole she is. All right, I'm kidding. He actually says, hey, so I feel like an asshole questioning why she wanted to help these poor orphans. Everybody I talk to says that's so messed up what she did that I should leave her. Now my mom hates her and called

her selfish scumbag. Um, some other bad names to be fair, the past couple of months, she's given me don't ask, don't tell hall pass. And I've been relatively successful. A couple with the fact that it's been nine months, I can't really remember what it's like to be around her. I was thinking I would wait till she gets back to see her in person, then reevaluate to see if I still feel the same way. I don't want to make a rash decision since it looks like I only have two more weeks to go. Just curious what you do in my situation. All right. This is actually, the thing that jumps out to me is that you guys are kind of meant for each other. You're both into your own thing. And maybe selfish is the wrong word, but you, this whole thing started with you being selfish.

And maybe selfish is the wrong word, but you, this whole thing started with you being selfish. So you wanted her to go because you wanted probably a break from her and you wanted to go to Tulum. So because you wanted to go to Tulum to shoot a movie with actresses, which I'm going to guess based on some of these other emails, like, I don't know if you were faithful then or not. You admit to not being, but with this hall pass version of it so maybe that's not as bad i don't know man some of some of these relationships out there absolutely blow my mind where i'm like wait what do you what what happens that's everybody's cool with that program

so uh we'll give you the benefit of the doubt here and and say that you didn't go to tulum to hang out with actresses beyond just working with them professionally but it started you wanted her to leave so you could get your space. And now she's staying there. I don't know if it's because she wants space from you, but because she went to help out a bunch of orphans. Now the easiest thing is like, Hey,

she's doing the right thing. What she's doing is incredible, which is true. But yes, you're engaged at some point. You want your fiance back to figure out if you're going to start a life in the States. So there has to be an expiration on this more than admirable act here.

This is unbelievable what she's doing. I'd also worry a little bit, man, about if you're 100% sure she didn't meet somebody, not to mess with you here a little bit. But then as you say, as she's extended this, but she's about to come back, yes, it would seem like she would want to come back, but she's probably so into her deal that she's surrounded by all these little kids that have no chance and she's trying to do whatever she can. So if we want to make a positive out of this, it'd be like, you're with this incredible person with this massive heart that can see the world this way. And as much as she may love you and can't wait to marry you and come back and

start a family, like in the moment, this is what she's seeing and what she's feeling. And she feels like she has to do it. She has this bigger calling, which I think so many people don't have. So you may be marrying somebody who's going to be an incredible mother or an incredible supportive person because they can be so selfless, even though you're feeling like she's being selfish only to you, which again, it's about you again. So I think you have a bit of a selfish streak in you. And by the way, did you tell your mom when she called her selfish and a scumbag that you have a hall pass to sleep with women? Did you tell your mom that part? Did you

tell your mom the part about where you wanted to go to Tulum extra time to hang out with local actresses? I bet you didn't tell your mom that part. Probably not. So I'm not even, you know, giving you a hard time here, but I think you have a selfish streak in you and that's okay. You know, it's, it's not,

I think, I think a lot of people are really selfish. I think more people are selfish than we realize. And more people don't like to admit how selfish they can be. And there can be certain things. Well, I'm not selfish. It's like,

yeah, but you do all these other things that are actually incredibly selfish. They're just not in the normally as easy to define selfish act. So I would personally wait. I would. I would wait till she comes back. I mean, if we're a couple of weeks away from this and you've gone through this entire time, I'm pretty sure you can come to that conclusion on your own. You care enough to write the email. You care enough about her to do those things. You cared enough about her to make her your fiance. Um, but yeah, you just gotta be like, look, if, if we're doing this, I just need to know that like, that's not going to happen again. And you got to get the right kind of answer. I don't

know what that is for you, but I think you got to come clean a little bit on this too and realize that you have some things where you make it about yourself and if she's okay with all that, you know, whatever. But I do, I don't know what you told your mom or not, but I doubt you told

her all those things. Like, mom, this sucks. She's over there, but I am hooking up left and right. Oh, that's's great everybody have a great thanksgiving you know whatever you're doing i know uh this is not ideal for a lot of people out there but um you know again just try to make the most of it with people closest with and uh if it's getting together with a couple friends you know that's that's not a bad thursday either so we'll be back on Monday, Monday, wrapping up the NFL week and everything going on and probably just, I'll probably have a longer form

solo NBA thing that I've been working on here a little bit, but I want to wait until a couple more things are finalized and all that kind of stuff before I jump in and have like a gap like we're having. So again, thank you so much. Please subscribe, subscribe, subscribe, rate, review the podcast and also follow on Spotify if you can. And we'll talk to you Monday.

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