The Ryen Russillo Podcast - Damar Hamlin, 'MNF,' and the Days Since With Domonique Foxworth. Plus Tales: What's Wrong With Boston, Love for OKC, Denver's Big Test, and Mitchell’s 71.

Episode Date: January 4, 2023

Russillo shares his Tales From the Couch, where he covers the Celtics' blowout loss to the Thunder, Kings-Jazz, the first-place Nuggets, and Donovan Mitchell's 71-point game (0:37). Then Ryen is joined by ESPN's Domonique Foxworth to discuss Damar Hamlin's collapse during the Bills-Bengals game, what it's like to be a teammate of a player who suffers a life-threatening injury, wrestling with how to talk about tragedy, big-picture questions surrounding the NFLPA, player safety, and more (20:55). Finally Ryen answers some listener-submitted Life Advice questions (55:22). Host: Ryen Russillo Guest: Domonique Foxworth Producer: Kyle Crichton Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

today's podcast we're going to do a few different things as we always do the most important thing we talk about tomorrow hamlin uh we don't have any new updates as of the taping of this podcast but we are going to talk with dominique foxworth who is uh positioned i think great to be a great resource on this topic not only is a former also a media member, but the former president of the Players Association. So we'll do that probably 30 plus minutes. Tales from the Couch, a bunch of NBA stuff, about 20 minutes on that. And we finish with life advice. We started this podcast with Tales from the Couch, light schedule, light NBA Tuesday night.

Went to dinner with Colin Cowherd and Stanford Steve last night. And that means I caught up last night. Went to dinner with Colin Cowherd and Stanford Steve last night. That means I caught up last night and then this morning, but I'm also going to include just some general stuff here along the way. The first thing, and I would do this no matter what, even if it was a packed schedule, how about your Boston Celtics? Smoked last night by the Oklahoma City Thunder. Let's give a review of where the Celtics have been heading here. Most of the problems are on offense. They were 21-5.

They beat Phoenix, and they've gone 5-7 since 26-12. Still the best record in the NBA, but there's some weird stuff going on with the offense that's been happening most of December. I don't know what the deal was after that Phoenix win that was so impressive. They go into their place. Granted, you could say,

oh, it's them getting off this road trip. Okay, fine. And like a lot of teams that are really good, it could just be this is their bad stretch. Maybe one of their two bad stretches. I mean, it happens. We try to point this out all the time in the pod. But it feels a bit like the offense has gotten stuck here during the stretch of these last 12 games. So Oklahoma City has 74 at the half.

You're like, okay, they'll get back into this one. And then the Thunder scored 76 in the second half. That normally doesn't happen. Jalen Williams started the second half. I was watching it again going, Jalen Williams, right to the hoop. Door, right to the hoop. Giddy takes Derek White for a ride, right to the hoop.

Aaron Wiggins, right into the paint turnaround. It was actually a tough jumper. So at that point, the Thunder have 80 points and they're only 7-21 from 3. And the reason I pointed out the dinner is not to name drop, but it was to look at a box score going, okay, what is the score here? Okay, what's happening? What's happening from 3? And when you look at the final numbers, you're like, okay, they shot it really well. This was all about the Celtics defense. It was awful.

I don't really know what it was. Was it not being ready for the size of the drivers for Oklahoma City? Was it looking at a Thunder team with, by the way, the bigger headline of this is Shea Gildress Alexander didn't even play

last night. So was it, okay, one of the best scorers, their guy, their clear number one isn't out there, so we're just going to kind of take this easy? I cannot emphasize this enough. The Thunder got to the hoop whenever they wanted to. And then there's no Rob Williams. But there was a switch to a zone from the Celtics,

which you never see with this group this year. And then the Thunder started making threes. And at one point, they're up 108-80. They're 60% now from the floor overall. Giddy is so good. I love that guy's game. Jalen Williams is just, you know, I do think there's a part of this Thunder team offensively, which, you know, you talk to other teams to try to figure out what you think philosophically the Thunder are trying to do.

And it's a ton of size. It's a ton of guys comfortable with the basketball. It's guys that can also make decisions with the basketball in their hands. And this seems to be the identity that they're going for when they've drafted the kind of play. Now, granted, you could just say, hey, this is the next best player. And that's where our pick was. And we went ahead and took them. You guys are making it more complicated than it is.

Well, whatever it was, whether by design or by draft slotting because i think it's probably a little bit of both it's very clear that they have multiple attackers which is something i absolutely love and how a basketball team can be built and that's even without chet who's another one of those guys but you know granted it could be just hey we took him number two because that's who we wanted to take in number two. So the bigger point to this is like, when you look at who the Thunder have been, I think it needs a little bit of pushback on the rebuild because it was so immediate that it was, okay, everybody's out of here.

Remember, they shut down Horford. They traded for Kemba. That wasn't even a part of it, And it can feel longer than it is. We're only on year three of this rebuild. And it feels a bit like it's talked about as if it's this perpetually challenged franchise with a roster with no direction. I mean, you could argue that this is actually going a lot quicker. It can feel longer. But when you think this is only year three of the Thunder rebuild, and there's some real talent on this team, and let's face it, they're just way better than you would have thought. They're 16 and 21. I'm not going to say they're a good basketball team,

but they don't suck. They're a game and a half out of the 10 spot, which is probably too good for what you were hoping for one more swing at what you have at the top of this upcoming draft, right? So it might be a little too ahead of schedule, but it feels like the Thunder kind of get lumped in with some of these teams that have been rebuilding forever when they made the playoffs 10 of 11 years and we're only on year three of this turning around. And there's like seven guys in this team that I'm enamored with. A couple of guys I love and a bunch of dudes where I'd be like, I'll take that guy.

So that's the thunder part of this. So you have to be ready. Hey, these guys can go. They can put you on your hip and Giddy's going to take you. Jalen Williams is going to take you. Trey Mann's got some juice to him. You know, Dort is not afraid.

Poku has nice nights. Like he's not totally lost and kind of like, what the fuck's this guy's deal? So it was funny to make fun of the bad plays, but there's some real talent there. So we've covered the Thunder part of this. Boston on the other side, whether it was they weren't ready, it was the end of the road trip, no Rob Williams, whatever.

It's no excuse. You give them 150 points of the Thunder. Boston is still number one in offense in the NBA. They're not playing like it because in December when I would look at it towards the end of it, they were 30th. There was a slight improvement from that. They finished just the

month of December. Boston was the 27th offense in the NBA. Again, that was a little improvement because they were around 30 for a few days. They were 28th in field goal percentage, 26th from three. So overall in the season, 117 points per 100 possessions. That dropped to 110.9 in December. The last 12 games, they're 27th.

That 12-game stretch is since that Phoenix win. Their net rating is a minus 2+, which is 20th. The offense wasn't the issue last night, but if you look at the December numbers, I think sometimes because Tatum and Brown have been so good, they had almost, what, 60 again? They're averaging, I think, 60 combined close to it in december that's also on 45 shots the problem might be a lack of balance and this again could all just be hey this is their bad

stretch there isn't something that's been fixed or totally screwed up or needs to be fixed right you guys understand what i'm talking about but when you look at the third, fourth, and fifth scores, it's Malcolm at 11. It's Smart at 11. It's Grant at nine points. I'm just wondering if some of that free-flowing stuff that looks so good and made him the number one offense, it still technically is number one. But if you've been watching him, you're like,

okay, this is not an offense that feels like it's in that neighborhood. But statistically, that's how good they were to carry being one of the worst offenses in December. Let's talk a little Sacramento. They're your five seed when you wake up today. They are 10-10 since a 10-6 start. I've had seven different leading scorers in games this year. They beat Denver in the rematch last week.

I've really focused in on that one just because I wanted to see what they had done differently and how they went right at Jokic late in that game. Granted, guys will try to get Jokic in the action. They went right at him, like five straight plays. I think it worked perfectly the first three. It's just going to be something when I talk about Denver again here towards the end that I'll bring up again. Not a huge deal. They hit the last second shot by Herter in that game to win it. They lost to Memphis.

Healthy Sacramento, healthy Memphis. You don't expect Sacramento to pull that one out all the time, right? They get Utah again last night after the last second game winner by Mark, and it didn't go down. Fox then technically has the game winner from that one. He had 22 of his 37 in the fourth quarter. He's 10th in fourth quarter scoring. Just to make sure you're totally covered

if you're hanging out with your buddies. Kyrie is number one. LeBron is number two in fourth quarter scoring right now. The team is seventh in fourth quarter offense. And if you look at their overall numbers, Sacramento seventh in offense, 23 in defense. December kind of went the other way there where they were a little bit more balanced.

The offense got a little worse. The defense got a lot better, 13th and 14th in the league. Let's talk a little bit about Sabonis. He's got this broken thumb. He had 21-14-8 last night. And I do think every time we have injuries, it can be labeled as if it's all the same thing, but the injuries can be very different.

So clearly it's good enough for him to still be able to play, but there's a little extra man juice, right, when you're out there with a broken thumb and he's got that little brace on it. His PER is a 24, career high before that was 21. Some of his advanced stats are insane. Like, dig through Sabonis. It doesn't take that long, a couple minutes.

The offensive rating, the plus-minus stuff, the defensive plus-minus stuff. So it leads to this question, and I know The Athletic did a really good job on this, kind of revisiting the Sabonis-Ala Burton trade. Were we so unaccustomed to a good player being traded for, here's a concept, another good player that we freaked out? That's part of it. It's also Sacramento's history, fair or unfair. It's real. It's like Sacramento did what? Traded Halliburton in his second year. There's also the financial part of this where you're controlling Halliburton for a really long time and the fact that Halliburton is awesome.

He's 21-10-4 this year. He's never been below 41% from three any place he's played. So it's not just all three seasons. It's every time he's played for a team, right? So when you step back and you go, Halliburton versus Sabonis, like who does this? There's also another part,

the benefit of the rest of the guard rotation, but you hate kind of compromising yourself and then justifying a deal. You don't like as much talent sending out, talent coming back because it actually frees up the other part of your roster. And by the way,

I think Halliburton could literally play with anybody. And if we just sat here giving praise to the Thunder for having multiple ball creators, decision makers and all this stuff, then you should be able to do that. I think Sacramento fans would admit at times last year, Fox pressing, pushing the issue. The fourth quarter numbers are important with him because they can be kind of hit or miss and maybe

not really even mean what they mean. But it felt like it wasn't great last year with Fox and now it's been really good. So does it free him up? I don't know. The point is that Sabonis is probably, well, no, I shouldn't say probably. He is way better this year than he's ever been, first of all. And I think it's just, it's something that at least,

I'm not going to end the segment saying, hey, it was actually an awesome trade, go Kings, like the beam. I just think the way we handled it was Sacramento's history, Halliburton's talent, the contractual stuff, and kind of we're just so used to any time a player's traded. It's like, wait, we're actually going to give you good players for the good player? Like, that doesn't work.

And it's worked for Sacramento. Look, they're a 500 team in the last 20 here, but the way the West is sort of bottled up, the different injuries that are going to happen, And it's worked for Sacramento. Despite, look, they're a 500 team in the last 20 here. But the way the West is sort of bottled up, the different injuries that are going to happen, I don't know there's necessarily anybody that you're really scared of in the West. I'm not telling you they're coming out of the West, but they're a real team. Like they're a real factor in the playoff race now in a way they haven't been in a long time.

So that takes me to Denver. They're your one seed today. They're ninth in point differential in the NBA, fifth in point differential in the West. This is a really good top seven. Every time I'm dialed in on them, we know all the headliners for it, but when you go Jokic, Murray, Gordon,

Porter Jr., Brown, KCP, KCP or Brown, you flip them on that one, Bones, who when he runs hot, it's a lot of fun. He was feeling himself against Boston. I'm going to get to that a little bit here, too. I mean, they thoroughly beat Boston this past weekend. Nice, impressive win from them, especially with the rim delay that took 40 minutes to get that thing straightened out in the middle of it.

I mean, that took forever. So there's a lot I like about Denver. We know the offense is terrific. They're probably going to surpass Boston in the number one offense. Maybe Brooklyn will if they stay healthy and have no bullshit to deal with, right? Because if you start looking at some of those numbers, you start looking at some of the fourth quarter efficiency offensive numbers. Jokic is the best fourth quarter player in the NBA,

and then that brings up the rest of the people around him because he's out on the floor giving you that kind of offensive output. So, when I looked at – I guess I'm just going to say it this way to Nuggets fans, I don't want you to be upset about this, but just be ready to be upset. But it's totally on you if you're upset. The Nuggets are now going to be critiqued as a team that is a contender. So the grading is going to get a lot tougher. There's going to be grad school classes for you. There's going to be a higher expectation. It's the's going to be grad school classes for you. There's going to be a higher expectation. It's the same stuff that happens with every other team.

That's a little bit newer on the scene. Not that this team is new, but you get the point, right? They don't have an NBA finals in their back pocket. They don't have a title. So they're going to be judged a little bit differently. There's going to be doubt. I'm not telling you that it's doubt. What I'm saying is it's a different neighborhood.

The example I used last year is the Bulls. The Bulls get off to this great start. Look, Denver's way better than the Bulls. Don't get freaked out. The Bulls hop through this great start and you're like, wow, is this team actually coming out of the East? All of us were like, no way. No. Then Bulls fans

get upset because it's like, what is this? We're finally better and now you're talking. No, no, no. Yeah, you're better. Congrats. Denver, you're better. The. Denver, you're better. The rest of the West, I don't know. Is it flattening down to you? Is New Orleans that much better than you? Is Memphis that much better than you?

I might like those teams a little bit better if everybody's healthy and it's all working out, right? Because I'm constantly always worried about Denver's defense long-term. But it's actually a compliment. It's a compliment that team or fans or media are taking you seriously enough to talk about you as an NBA Finals participant.

It just means that the critiques are going to be a little bit more harsh because more is expected of you. And that's exactly what's going to happen. And you're all going to get pissed. And you're all going to think it's about you. And everybody's out to get to... Everybody loves Denver, man. The city, right? Don't worry about it. But it's going to happen.

That also leads to, as I close here, two of my favorite plays from last week. Denver in that Boston game was up 116-104 with 324 left. You can hear Mike Malone on the sideline telling the offense as they're bringing it across, going, slow down, slow down, right? You're up 12, three and a half to go. Work a little clock. Work a little clock.

Work a little clock. Jokic had Smart pinned in the paint. Now, we can all say Smart's a really good defender in the post. It's Jokic, okay? And there wasn't really any help that was that close. Michael Porter Jr. on the right side, passing three-point line, has Grant Williams in his face. It's a completely contested shot if he's going to take it.

There's also time left. And as he gets into the shot, it's off with 14 seconds left on the shot clock after the coach just yelled, slow down, and Jokic head smart one-on-one right at the rim. That's the kind of shit that doesn't show up in the box score. That's where people get frustrated with me when I'll watch and say, yeah, I know what his numbers were. I know what it was.

But there's a lot of little stuff in there that are just losing plays. It was my DeMarcus Cousins stuff. It ended up being Westbrook a little bit. There's just players where I'm like, man, he's really talented. He's really nice. But man, there's a lot of stuff that leads to wins and losses that are hard to figure out which chart to put him in. It was an impossibly stupid shot attempt. They still won the game.

It didn't matter. It's probably been forgotten by everybody. But that's the kind of stuff with Porter Jr. where you're going, are you still going to do stuff like this? Because that can cost you a game in a playoff series. I wouldn't think he would do it in a playoff. I wouldn't hope.

But every Nuggets fan listening to this right now is going, yeah, I know what you're talking about. You know what? That still wasn't the dumbest shot that I saw the past week. I've got to talk a little about Donovan Mitchell's 71. It was just one of those moments as an NBA fan. You're like, I'm so happy I decided that this was the game I wanted to watch. For whatever reason, Garland was out.

I absolutely love Garland. He's one of my favorite players in was out. I absolutely love Garland. He's one of my favorite players in the league. I fucking love that guy. He's out, and I'm like, let's see what Mitchell does because they needed it from him. He only took 34 shots. He took a million free throws. Yes, there are certain players that take a million free throws. I'm not as impressed because I think they're working the officials

the entire time. With Mitchell, I don't think that's necessarily in his bag as much as his other guys. Okay, rant over. Yes, I enjoyed Mitchell's 71 more than Luka's 60-point triple-double. I enjoy maybe just the... Is it more dynamic when Mitchell's doing it? I don't care. I don't want to debate it. That's a

personal preference on that one. The missed free throw on purpose, much like Donchett's, to get it into overtime, he did cross the line before the ball hit the rim. So does literally everybody who takes free throws. They never call it ever. Billy Donovan after the game, I understand your frustration. They just don't enforce it. They don't. And when they do, it's like, you're going to call this now. Watch the biggest guy inside on the box out lane on a free throw. Their feet are over the line

when they line up. I guess they're allowed to in a weird way that the foot curls up on the sneaker, that that's not necessarily touching the paint. It's just over the line. I don't know. Every time you see that camera angle, I'm telling you, the guy's foot is over the line and they just don't care. Guys get in early.

So I'm almost like, it's like illegal screens at times, which they call way more, but I would hate in a close game. You're like, you're going to call it now. And it's not egregious when guys are jumping out and kind of leaning in on stuff all the time. Like it just happens. So as I finish here, as I'm talking about the dumbest shot attempt that I saw from the week, Mitchell's going crazy.

Everybody's trying to get him the ball back. And by the way, they needed it. They needed Mitchell to do this to go off at the close of the game and in overtime where they pulled away. There's a possession late. Guys are trying to get him the ball back.'s like the first half when Clay is going off and Levert's like oh I got this

did he air ball it or brick it from the corner he's the only guy that thought he was shooting in that spot so there you go. We'll gear up and do some more NBA on Friday. Looking to get more out of this NBA season? Well, now is the perfect time to download FanDuel,

America's number one sportsbook, because new customers get a no-sweat first bet up to $1,000. That's free bets back if your first bet doesn't win. Just download the FanDuel Sportsbook app. It's safe, secure, and super easy to use. Then you can bet on everything from the money line to touchdown scores to overyards. Okay, let's take a look at this. I was going through against the spread stuff.

Portland, number one in the NBA right now, 21-14 against the spread, 61%. Dallas, the worst, 13 at 23, two pushes, 36%. So, I don't know that you start going, okay, Dallas is going to balance this out, start going against Portland. Well, neither are on the books for tonight. So, we're going to have to dig a little bit deeper here. Give me Sacramento minus one and a half at home against Atlanta. The totals

in some of these games is insane because the offense keeps going up and up. That total right now is 244 and a half. Good luck with that one. I mean, unless you wanted to say Atlanta's still out west, you know, playing under there, but unders right now is 244.5. Good luck with that one. I mean, unless you wanted to say Atlanta's still out west, you know, playing under there. But unders right now in the NBA probably feel like an awful time to sit around and watch it with some of the scores that we have.

So that's the play. Sacramento at home minus a point and a half. Back to the read. Plus FanDuel, even unless you combine your bets for a chance to win a bigger payout with a same-game parlay. FanDuel is also now live in Ohio. So make sure you get in on the action also with great offers just for you now and throughout January. So don't miss the chance to get your no-sweat first bet up to $1,000 in free bets when you join FanDuel with promo code Ryan, R-Y-E-N.

Make every moment more with FanDuel, an official sports betting partner of the NBA. Must be 21 or older in select states. First online real money wager only. Refund issued with non-withdrawable free bets. It expires in 14 days. Restrictions apply. See terms at sportsbook.fanduel.com. I want to talk about DeMar Hamlin now. As many of you

by the time you're listening to this, watching the Buffalo-Cincinnati game on Monday night, you know, I like a lot of you sitting around excited about a game, and then we see a hit. Hamlet gets up, and he goes down. It's scary. We learn that he has cardiac arrest in the field,

and they perform CPR. They bring him to the hospital after they get him off the field, and, you know, we're all kind of waiting on the updates. And Dominique Foxworth, who hosts the Dominique Foxworth show on ESPN, has been on the podcast a bunch of times, not only a seven-year vet, but also the former executive president of the NFLPA,

which I think brings a ton of perspective on this. And, you know, we get along and I just want to talk to you about it. You know, kind of take me through, because I know you've been on TV and you've done your own stuff. Take me through the last day or so. Yeah, I mean, I think, like you, everybody's excited for the game and then I was getting my haircut

while I was watching the game in my hotel room and he had just finished and I called his attention to the screen and was like, before you leave, you see this? Because I thought that Hamlin had gotten knocked unconscious and I was like, man, this is ugly. And then they went to commercial.

And then when they came back, I saw the faces. And that's when my mind went to the worst possible places. I saw Josh Allen covering his nose and his mouth. I saw Stefan Diggs with tears streaming down his eyes, other players hugging and all that. And my mind went to the worst possible place. Then we come to find out all the things that we have found out since then is that Hamlin's heart has stopped and everything changed. And I remember thinking immediately, there's no way that they can make this game is going to be canceled. And I, like everyone else, was surprised as it went on longer and longer.

And eventually I couldn't watch anymore. And looking at my phone made me mad. And I think like everyone, I was feeling helpless, but also so much energy, emotion. I didn't know what to do with it. And so I just ended up leaving my phone in the hotel room and and and going for a walk around new york uh because i didn't i don't know i just didn't know what to do it didn't feel right to like engage in in the social media of it all

and we really can't do anything to fix you know to address it and and the grief and the struggle with a moment like that it also like feels like it's not my moment I don't know it was just a lot going on what did I don't

know if you've talked about this like how did you feel coming out of all of it well no i haven't talked about it i mean because the way the taping schedule worked and so uh you know it just was so scary it was different you know it's it's weird to feel like you're almost desensitized to the concussion hits that knock guys out you know we've seen enough of them. So even though it's scary for its own reasons, you're kind of conditioned to it. Um, and then there's this where you're like, wait, the hit, you know, what was the hit? And then you're, you're watching it over and over again. Then you see him fall the

way he fell. And then once, once some of the information came out that he's being administered CPR in the field, then I was like, okay, this is totally different. And the first thing you're thinking about is this young guy. If you know his history and how much people love him and like everybody, you're thinking about his family. And then it

like there's a couple different directions we can go here in the conversation. But I think the first part is like seeing the teammates you're right like the teammates and the opposing players like it was different and so then you start going did this happen like did this actually happen um you've you've been on the field for for stuff like this i know there was also a pre-season game when you were with Denver. Thomas Herrien.

Yeah, Thomas Herrien for Denver died after the game. I feel like an ass going, hey, what's that like? But I'm just trying to get the perspective of what it's like. So yeah, you don't have to feel like an ass to me because I think we don't get enough opportunities to talk about these sorts of things because it's part of the game and nobody wants to hear about it. But anyway, preseason game, Thomas played for the 49ers. I played for the Broncos.

After the game, he went in the locker room and he never came out. I also was on the field when Kevin Everett was paralyzed in Buffalo. I was running down on kickoff. He was on kickoff return. And we did the whole five minutes, warmed back up, and continued to play. Because as jolting as that was, it's normal-ish for football. resulting as that was. It's normal-ish for football. We all could name two or three times or more where we, even if someone wasn't paralyzed, because we don't know at the time how bad the injury is, we can all name a few times where we've seen someone cart it off and just keep playing.

And as shocking as it was at the moment, we just kept playing. I honestly have been talking a lot about Derrick Williams, was my teammate in Denver. We were rookie cornerbacks drafted at the same time. And he was in our second year. After the last game of the year, he was murdered that night. It was New Year's Eve. And I know this is very different. And obviously, we're wishing for the best for Hamlin.

But that was the only other time where I remember seeing football players together feeling like that. I was in bed. It was like four in the morning. Champ Bailey called me and said, Darren's been shot. And so I just... My wife, who was my girlfriend at the time, we just went to the hospital.

And she stayed in the car, and I went in, and I was in a room with a number of my teammates, Darren's mom, a couple of my teammates had blood all over their white t-shirts. And we sat there in shock, not knowing what to do, not knowing what to say,

and feeling hopeless and helpless. And we didn't have a game to finish that day or a game to go to the following week. Had we won? And the reason why that comes to mind is because that morning when we woke up, we had to play again. Coincidentally, it was the 49ers. If we beat them, we're in the playoffs. If we lose, we're out.

So I remember distinctly waking up that morning and thinking, worst thing that could happen today is we could lose. And then obviously that's not the worst thing that could happen. And I imagine that same thing is like, these players are going out there and they're probably thinking like, worst thing, if it even crosses their mind, but like they know that it's a realistic possibility that I could lose or I could be the goat of this game. Like it could be my fault. It's like I could give a game-winning touchdown. I could have the fumble.

That is the worst thing that is in the back of their mind. And then something that they didn't even consider happens. And then you don't know how to deal with it. Nobody knows how to deal with it. No one knows what to say. No one knows how to behave. And it just hangs there. So it's hard to a lot of times as like a former player who's in the media when things happen in football, people come to us as former players and say, what's it like in the locker room? What's it feel like to have this, like, I have no idea. Like, this is not a normal thing. I have no idea what it feels like. I have no idea how to respond to any of this. I have no idea what these players must be going through. And they just feel helpless and hopeless and in limbo, just like the rest of us.

But the other thing that comes to mind for me is how much time we spend together. And I think you might be able to relate to this. And a lot of people who relate to this is like, sometimes you have conditional friends

that you become friends with them because of the circumstances. But it doesn't make the friendship any less like potent. And I remember being on teams and we call each other family, call each other brothers, because that's what it really feels like. Like when you go to work with someone every day and

you go out and party with them and you go through hard things with them, like you go through training camp with them, you have success with them, you fail with them. It does feel like a family. And I haven't felt like outside of my wife and kids and my parents, I haven't felt closer to anybody in my life than my teammates. And of course, once we go different ways, go different parts of the country, I may not maintain those relationships. I have with some, but may not with all. But in that moment, it feels like it's your brother. And then thinking about how those players must feel in that moment is like unimaginable, just unimaginable pain. A lot of the conversation led to what is the NFL doing? Why is this taking so long? What's up with this? Okay, ready to go in five minutes stuff. And depending on how long you stayed in on the broadcast and after a while, I was with you, I just couldn't take it anymore. I was like, I'll find out the news when I find out the rest of the news. But a lot of the focus is on that. And the NFL has a bad track record with this. They just

do where it's like, hey, you can make one decision that makes sense and everybody would be cool with and you can make the wrong one. And it seems like so many times their PR, they just, they suck at it. And that was a real focus of the criticism, not only as a former player, but also your position with the Players Association. How did you feel about that part of the night? Honestly, the time it took for them to call the game off, I don't know. I didn't respond to that as angrily as so many other people did.

I gave them a bit of the benefit of the doubt. My assumption is they did not send someone down to tell the players they have five minutes. My assumption is that the word got to Joe Buck because that's protocol. It's like, it's not that anyone said, this is what we need to do,

but someone asked, how do we handle this situation? And my guess is someone in the know was like, well, traditionally, if there's an injury stoppage or there's like a weather stoppage, is everyone gets five minutes to warm up before they resume. And I don't think that they are that crazy and sensitive. Yeah, that's stupid of me to say. They can be that insensitive, but it didn't seem like, at least for me, and again, back to the original point is like, we all had emotions and we wanted to get them out in some way. And finding someone to yell at is normally like it's cathartic in some ways.

And the NFL is an easy target. And I will come down on the NFL about many things and always will. And, you know, like we've had these serious union talks in the past. And it's one of the reasons why I really like and respect you is because I think you are clear headed in that stuff in ways that most people in the media are not. But that to me just felt like a waste of energy for me and time. It was like, all right, how fast you cancel the game. They didn't play. They eventually got to the right idea. This did not impact the health or safety of Hamlin or anybody on the field.

So honestly, I didn't care much about how long it took them. They got to the right end. If you're still active as the Players Association, I guess, what would you be doing today? Yeah, so I think you go be with the families is the first thing you do. And

the next thing, and you can do multiple things at one time, but it's be with Hamlin's family and also make sure that the players on both teams are being provided with the level of support that they need, mental health and otherwise. And also I think it's projecting. The big question is solidarity is where the strength of the union comes from.

Does the rest of the league want to play this weekend? Because I could understand. And I think that would be my guess. What the union should be doing is getting all their players on the same page. Because I could imagine a situation where

even if you weren't playing in that game, you would have a hard time going out there this weekend. I think more likely than not, most players want to play because they always want to play. But I think you need to, as a leader of the union or anyone in the union, you need to protect the players in any way possible and look for any avenue to get

to that result so like clear the path for there not to be games this weekend if that's something that the players want after you've also and like you there's big union a lot of employees a lot of people can work on different things but that's the that's I mean

I was going to say that's the first and most important thing that's the only thing the union exists to protect the players. Like, everything you should be doing right now is about protecting the players, the current players and their families. Yeah, this brings up like more of a delicate talking point because, you know, I...

At times, like as you just suggested, if the players decided this week that they didn't want to play, let's say that plays out. But you're right. Most of that they didn't want to play. Let's say that plays out. But you're right. Most of the players probably still want to play. Who wants to be on the other side of that argument, right? Who would want to go on TV on Friday and then be like, well, I still think the players should

be able to play. Even if you know at some point the NFL is going to resume business, the realistic part of me would go, okay, but eventually the league is going to play again. You wouldn't want to be on get upset the next day with that position. You definitely wouldn't be doing it Tuesday morning, maybe more so Friday. When it's happening, there's only one thing to say, right? And then a little bit more time goes by and then you start asking bigger picture questions

it's like well even if i were to look at the league's motivations and wanting to get things back on schedule i don't really want to take that argument because then it just makes me look like i don't understand the magnitude of what's just happened these conversations are being had in the league office so like whether we talk about them or not is irrelevant. They are doing them and they should be. Like again, the league has more employees than the union. So they have a bunch of people working on a bunch of different things. They should be also considering how to address the impact that this had on the schedule,

how to address it if they have to push everything back one week. But I do think even if you think that the league is callous, which I do think they are in many ways, their image matters, which you can go back to how aggressively they punish players who get in trouble. It's because their image matters.

And I think that they also would be concerned about how they would be perceived in this way if they are seen to be forcing players back out there. So like I don't think anybody wants to say or do the wrong thing right now but the NFL knows that to some degree their product is so

coveted that they're frankly invincible. Like if they're, frankly, invincible. If they bungle this situation, y'all not going to watch the Super Bowl? Come. That's what it boils down to for them. So they are preparing for every possibility, which is what any big company should do. big company should do. And they also have people I'm sure who are tending to the needs of, um,

of DeMar Hamlin and his family and the bills players. So they can do all those things at the same time. It is uncomfortable. And I got a lot of pushback today from a lot of people because after I said all the right things, because we all know the right things we're supposed to say, after I said all the right things, because we all know the right things we're supposed to say,

I then pivoted the conversation to broader player health and safety and union issues and even into the salary cap. And the point I was trying to make is that there is no cap on the risk that

the players are taking. And normally in society uh especially in issues of business or if anyone's like invested money you understand that the risk is normally commensurate with the reward and the risk is not commensurate with the reward in football because there is no cap on the price that they can pay, but there is a cap on the money they can receive. And another thing that like... So let me interrupt there because that's a great point. No, no, it's such a good point. I don't want to lose it on the next point that you make. You got pushback. Why? Because you were equating this tragedy with then a salary cap

position. I don't understand. I mean, people don't like it. It's fine. I expected it. It's just like the pushback is the same argument, frankly. And it's just hit me. It's kind of the same argument that you hear when after there's like some big act of violence. It's like, this isn't the time and place for this conversation.

You know, it's like that, like right now, we need to be praying for DeMar Hamlin and his family. Like I can do that. And I can also point out that this system is not fair, you know, and that part of the reason why this came to my mind is because whenever I see this outpouring, it happened when Tua had that big injury on that same field. Whenever I see this outpouring of like support and compassion for players, from fans and from members of the media,

I can't help but go back to when I was negotiating for the CBA and we needed every bit of support that we can have because as you know the power dynamics are asymmetric the league has so much more power than us in negotiations and they were presenting this story to the public and to us that they were losing money and all we had some like strength and solidarity amongst the players but honestly what it felt like what tipped us in losing some of that strength and solidarity was the public turned against us also and

our players are extremely like susceptible to that is everybody wanted football back and then they started calling us greedy and our players started to like break off. Yeah, I can't. I'm not greedy. I want to play ball, but they won't let us play.

And rather than turning that towards the owners or just saying, I understand that this is a fight between business. Because we didn't go and strike. We got locked out. But anyway, that is just my own personal experience bleeding in where I just kind of get annoyed when everyone's like, we care so much. They should have ended the game so much quicker.

Where were you when we were trying to negotiate for longer than five years of extended health care for players? You were out here saying that we were greedy. And so the other point I was going to make is like, DeMar Hamlin is in his second year. He's not vested. So if he never plays again, all the benefits that retired players

can avail themselves of, including five years of insurance, which honestly, if you play football, you should have lifetime health insurance, but including the five years of health insurance afterwards, including the pension, all the benefits, including the health reimbursement account, all the benefits, he doesn't have access to because he's not vested because that costs more money. So I'm sorry if it makes people uncomfortable

to pivot to that. But I think the reason why it makes me feel better to do that is because while we all feel like helpless and we all want to do something, some of us like lash out at the league or lash out here or lash out there. This is me pointing to something like this is something that we can do. That's the only thing that we can change because we're not going to do away with football. We love it too damn much. So if we want to keep it, at least try to protect the people

and reward the people that are willing to, or not willing, but want to take the risk. I love that you said it and i but i also understand there's this i'll never figure out exactly what when the time is that's like okay now it's okay to do this i mean maybe even some people listening to this on a wednesday would be like now it's not the time and it's like well this is the real part of it you know i bet you most fans have no idea that Hamlin wasn't a vested player at this point. And where I stand on all the CBA negotiation stuff, especially with this group

of owners, which we don't even have to go down that road. Yeah. I guess the last thing to finish up here is, you know, you're on Buffalo. You know, you go through everything you're going to go through this week. You're waiting on the updates. You're certainly more emotionally vested than the rest of us who are just sitting at home watching all of this. What else does the union do? Like, what else is the role here? Because you spoke, obviously, of DeMar and his family supporting them.

What does the union do for a team in this spot? Yeah, I think there are three mental health professionals available, like, through the CBA. Like, each team should have a mental health professional. In a time of crisis like this, you're going to need more than one, obviously. So like, I think it's ensuring that guys are availing themselves of this resource.

It's a really hard thing to do sometimes because I remember the Darren thing happened and I was not answering my phone. I was not responding to anything. I wasn't going to the facility. I did not get whatever counseling that could have been available for me. I don't even know if it was at the time, but like, I just went dark. That's how I dealt with it. Maybe it was healthy. Maybe it wasn't. But I think the union needs to be at this point, making contact with each player individually. At some point, someone has to talk to these guys, everybody. And they can't force them to get anything and maybe not everyone needs the counseling.

But I think that we're drawn to this game and I think you make it to this level. It's kind of a sifting process and they're going to be people that are unbalanced in some way. And I don't mean that negatively. None of us are perfectly balanced humans. But in order to make it to this level, I think that ability to compartmentalize comfort with violence.

And also there's some gladiatorial, hyper macho. I know that when I first... I was a really good athlete as a kid, like even like five, six years old. And I played basketball and I played football and I played a bunch of stuff, but I wanted to play football because that was what the men play. That's what the tough guys play. Like the soft dudes play basketball. And I know that about myself. And I see that in my, I have three kids now, one boy,

my nine-year-old son is different than my daughters in that he got hurt playing like in the house. He's so damn proud of his little stupid injury. You know, like there's something about us

and I don't mean men necessarily, but probably disproportionately men. And there's football players that like, there's something about us that like is invigorated by going into the danger. And I think that sometimes we talk about needing to protect people from themselves.

If someone has to stop the guys on the team that are like, let's keep it going. I mean, I don't know the right answer. I'm not a mental health professional, but you need to make sure that you talk to each of the players. And that can't just be today. You need to have had a relationship with them, someone who has a relationship. Understand that they are getting what they need and they aren't like setting themselves up to like, and it's impossible to get everybody, but they aren't setting themselves up to be doing more damage. I don't know how

compartmentalizing all this stuff impacts everyone long-term. I can guess, but I think that's the most important role of the union right now is to be part of the reason why the executive director's job of being a union is so shitty. It's a lot like the commissioner's job and that it's your responsibility to be the person everyone hates. So like back to the point, if the players cannot play this week or should not play this week, the person who has to step out and be the one who everyone's like, you're stopping them from playing. That person has to be executive director of the union or the president of the union. Like those guys have to do it. And this is the terrible part, one of many terrible parts about that job. many terrible parts about that job. I think that's the next step is to try

to limit the damage that you're doing to any player or any person affiliated with this situation because there is going to be damage done from this to everybody psychologically, emotionally and obviously physically

for Hamlin. Last thing, because I feel like there's a lot of like checklist questions, right? I could go, what can the NFL to do to be safer? What can player? And it's like,

I kind of feel like they're all, I know, but I feel like they're, I feel like they're stupid questions. You know what I mean? Like, I mean, I'm happy to spend as much time as you want talking about as, as much of this stuff as you want to. but I feel like they're stupid questions. You know what I mean?

I'm happy to spend as much time as you want talking about as much of this stuff as you want to. So I don't think they're stupid. I think to the health and safety thing, what can they do? The tough thing is we don't know what caused this yet. Right. And so we could learn that it had nothing to do with football because the hit like if that hit is going to like has the chance of leading to that. You can't play football. You just can't. And so there's there's so much we don't know there.

So, like, I feel like it's very difficult. And I know know you know this but like for anyone who would want to know the answer to that question the question is we can't answer it until we know what actually happened right we saw what happened but we don't know what happened inside of him or what caused that yeah but I think what happens is there'll be this moment everyone rallies yeah to like this this this like movement of like hey you got because got, cause it's, it's a win to sit there and say, Hey, the NFL needs to do this. They need to be safe. They need to be safer. And I've always, I don't know. I've just suggested like, I, I get this as kind of part of the relationship with this violent sport as awful as it felt on Monday and the uncertainty in the days after.

And I don't know that there's some dramatically safer version of this. So when all this time is spent in talking about it over and over and over again, I'll be like, I don't know what you think you want today really exists in the future. There have obviously been a ton of improvements. The field is a different question or a different debate altogether. It's not even close to being in the same category with what happens here with Hamlin. But I feel like a lot of the conversation predictably goes in that direction. And I'll kind of sit and watch and go, I don't know if these questions are really that relevant or solvable.

I think honestly, what you're hinting around is like a broader question about social change. And I remember having this conversation after with Mina about after the Deshaun Watson stuff. stuff. She was more optimistic coming out of that than I was. And the point that she was making to me that I think applies to this and applies to a lot of social change is you build up this big

fervor around an event and you make some finish line being the solution and then you don't get to the finish line. So you feel like you failed, but this is actually the process is like something happens that gens up enough support in that moment.

And it's like, reminds me honestly of George Floyd is like, I was more optimistic going through like that, like summer or whatever, where you're calling that time. Because it was like, oh, there's this flashpoint where the society is willing to talk about this and interesting and interested in having a discussion about change. During this time point, we got to push, push, push, push, push as hard as we can. And we're not going to get to like the finish line,

but hopefully we got closer. And then the next time some shit happens, you got to like gin it all up again and get a little closer and you're never going to get there. And I feel like that is the only way I can look at this with only way I can think about this without like getting sad and disappointed and dejected because we aren't going to solve football between now and when we start playing again. But while people are willing to have this conversation, because I mentioned this on Get Up This Morning, this union stuff means more to me than anything. And I want to talk about it every day that I'm on TV,

but I can't. The ratings would go through the floor and Mike would never invite me back if I showed up after a normal week of football. I was like, you know what? Really need to look at this salary cap. You know, the draft? Unethical. Illegal.

Honestly, like, nobody cares. But right now, people are listening. And I feel like this is the only way you can think about stuff like this and it like I mentioned doesn't just apply to this moment applies to any sort of social changes when there's a flashpoint that's why when you mentioned if you asked

if I wanted to come on I was like hell yeah I want to come on because I like I get to I'm gonna be tired of shit tonight but this is the only time I'm gonna get to talk about this tomorrow don't nobody want to talk about this again well that's why I ask you because you are awesome at it. I always

appreciate the time. Your perspective is unique. It's always educational and like everybody else, we're all waiting on hopefully some good news here. So thanks, man. Nah, I appreciate you too. And don't cut this last part out. I

really respect and appreciate what you bring to this. Um, and like, we've, we've talked a bunch of times before. It's like, we don't always agree, but like, there are people who I think are genuine in their disagreements, you know, and I can respect that. And like also willing to be like, oh, yeah, well, maybe I was wrong. And also firm in their opinion. And that like, I don't know. I really respect that about you. And I appreciate you having me.

That's all. Well, normally you cut those out, but I'll leave it. I know, but I said, please. Well, normally you cut those out, but I'll leave it. I know, but I said, please. I get so mad about the union's fight against this group of owners that I seriously go like, have I ever made enough money? I would want to take it on.

I would want to join the fight. And I never had a helmet. I don't have a law degree. It makes me so mad every time I become more and more educated on what the football plate is. I'm on the player's side in every one of these because the bullshit peddling that goes on from the ownership side of this, and I don't want to turn this too much of a rant and detract from everything we just talked about, but anyone that wants to spend time on how this really works and what this group of these 32 owners try to sell the public all the time and a commissioner that just can never seem to get it right. It bothers me so much and I didn't even play with any of you.

I didn't play and I go, you know, I wonder if one day I could just be like hey what do you need because I'm like I like how do we how do I help and that's seriously how passionate I am about it once I started to learn more about it and obviously all the time I've spent talking with you and when I see something happen to a player and you educate us more on what he could be facing here in the future. You know, how could you not have sympathy? How could you take any other side than, than the player side of this?

Appreciate you, brother. Thanks. You want details? Bye. I drive a Ferrari. 355 Cabriolet. What's up?

I have a ridiculous house in the South Fork. I have every toy you could possibly imagine. And best of all, kids, I am liquid. So, now you know what's possible. Let me tell you what's required. Life advice. Lifeadvicerr at gmail.com is the address. Kyle, check it in.

Do it well. Five check. Yeah? Fives are great. Yeah. Why is that? A lot of energy from you right now. I just feel like I give you a one-word answer.

I'm going to try to give you a four-word answer when you ask me how I'm doing. Now it's like a 10-word. Doing well. Okay. Inheritance. 6'3", 200 pounds. H hitting a second prime in my late 30s by focusing on body weight exercises, which has helped me keep the nagging injuries at bay.

Thank you for the very specific late 30s update. Love the show. Tyson Fury, favorite episode. Okay, I'm seeking your collective wisdom on a father-son issue that's been weighing on my mind. I'll get straight to the point, provide some background. My dad recently did his will and is giving his stepson 50% of his inheritance. My sister and I each getting 25% a piece.

Uh-oh. Well, let's find out the dynamic here. I was setting up something for him on his computer and saw the document on his desktop while I was alone in his office. I clicked it out of curiosity. This is checking the phone? Is that what this is? Yeah, check this.

So I've been checking my dad's Word docs i check them once a year what's that singer's name again yeah did i say it wrong last last time you know we went over before the show and you still kind of went your own way and i think everybody knew what you were talking about yeah well I apologize to both her and the audience all right so I clicked it out of curiosity not expecting to find anything out of the ordinary why did you click it then he mentioned a few weeks earlier that he and his wife were doing their wills and that he'd share a copy soon so I didn't think much of opening it I was shocked when I saw the percentages laid out, but I didn't bring it up since he said he was planning to share it with me. So I figured I'd wait. Now months have passed and he's never mentioned the will again after

the initial conversation where he said he'd be giving me a copy soon. My dad and I have a pretty good relationship going back to when I was a kid. He coached my sports team, did an overall really good job raising me. We had a couple of rough years when I was a teen, but nothing out of the ordinary. He and my mom divorced when I was 16. He remarried when I was in college. I get along fine with his wife, but I definitely don't call her mom or anything of the sort. We've been pretty close as adults. And I even moved to a particular city after grad school to live closer to him so we could spend time together. We regularly went to baseball games, got lunch. I now live elsewhere, but I check in via phone and visit regularly.

Sounds like a pretty good son, Kyle. Yeah. Sounds like you're doing okay. Yeah. And I like what he said there. He said he did a pretty good son, Kyle. Yeah, sounds like you're doing okay. Yeah, and I like what he said there. He said he did a really good job raising me. Overall, really good job raising me. All of us can come up with stuff. Be like, eh, could have done that a little bit better. Yeah, he didn't send the bullet points, though, and that's important. That's good. He didn't say all

the reasons that it's obvious that his life isn't going super well, that things are wrong. So yeah, I think you're doing well with that. As a non-parent, but a guy with parents parents because that's kind of how we all get here i i i think i'll forever be fascinated with the relationship of of you know creator and offspring seriously just from the outside looking in sort of what do you mean I'm serious. Just from the outside looking in?

What do you mean? Just like how much can you really blame your parents and if you only blame them? Well, some people actually can and then there's a lot of people who think they can because some people can. So it is fascinating. You're right. Yeah.

I'm not absolving every parent ever, but it's a test where there's never going to be a perfect score ever. It's like when you send a writing, whether a couple of different things I'm working on, I know every time it's going to come back with suggested changes. There's no fucking way. There's no one who ever will go, yeah, nailed it. Especially with me now. It's only going to be offered up changes. So every time I hand in something, I'm like, I wonder what they're going to say that they don't like about it. It's like, I don't know. It's like a kid, you know, when they're 25 and they like, you know, I've been thinking about some things, you know, I have, what I'm telling the parents listening is

I have a ton of sympathy for you in that one. You can do a bang up job. And at some point, whether it's the teens or the 20s, that kid who you create is going to come back and go, hey, remember. And oh, he would say it to you. They'll just say it to others. Yeah, right. Right. Because there's also some truth in it, too. Like in some of the parents, you just did a shitty job right for

whatever reason okay so this guy we're in the clear no real resentment here not yet at least right yeah so we finish here i'm financially independent i make a good salary so does my wife we live within our means they're not in need of any money from inheritance my dad has a successful career i imagine he has a pretty decent chunk of change saved up i offer this information for context but the money is really not what's bothering me about this. I know some people are probably saying, no, let's give the guy the benefit of the doubt. I would be okay both financially and psychologically if he donated his life savings to charity. But the fact that his stepson is getting all caps twice, what I am slotted to receive is what bothers me.

Not knowing it, only knowing the email. I hear you, man. Right? The ratio feels super disrespectful considering this is his will, not his wife's. She has her own will, which is separate, includes the same ratio, good for her, that doesn't bother me one bit.

Wait, so is the stepmother putting you guys down as 25 percenters? That's what it sounds like. Yeah, okay. All right. I didn't even know her until i was in college like i said so i wouldn't care if i were in her will at all it's definitely made me second guess my relationship with my dad especially since he's the one who initially brought it up and told

me to expect to receive a copy soon but then never actually sent one i think that his wife strong armed him into the argument he feels guilty about it so he's hoping i just forgot i'm kind of glad i saw it now because if he were to pass this on and I saw it for the first time in that situation, I think it would be even rougher. I'm not sure how to proceed, but it's messing with my head and I could use some advice. Okay. First off, he can never know that you found it. Right?

Like you did something fucked up. You're telling us you kind of backed into this whole thing. You clicked on the fucking wheel, man. He read it. Right? And you don't like what you saw, right? I don't have, you know, the step dynamic with me. You know, my father was rushed to the hospital a couple years ago.

He's fine. You know, it was kind of a, you know, scary thing, but happens to get a little dirt. And we were like doing the wheel as I was getting to the airport, you know, going to fly to go see him. And I don't know if my siblings would have been upset or not but he was basically like making me the executive of the estate and i think every one of my siblings knows especially like with me like i don't i knew like hey it's gonna be on me everybody's gonna be

fine don't fucking worry about it i don't know if one of my other siblings, although I don't know if they listen to the podcast that they would even care or if there's a lot of them, but I was going to be in control of basically all of it. And there's probably one that maybe wouldn't have liked it. But I mean, we were kind of on a deadline here.

Like we were rushing to make sure all this stuff was buttoned up within a matter of 48 hours. So I don't know what this is like. I don't know this part of it. You've said you don't care. You clearly care, right? You care because of the ratios. You care because you feel like you've been deceived. But the first part, Kyle, is you can't ever let him know that you know. So you're just going to wait this out. Now, if it goes on and on, maybe it's taking so long because he knows that it's going to be a tough one to explain.

You could follow up and say, hey, I started doing my estate planning. Did you ever finish yours? You know, start planting those seeds of like, hey, I'd kind of like to see it. Who'd you go through? Yeah, right. I don't know. Right. There's a really cool program I saw online where they kind of do pie charts.

Like, you want me to show it to you? Is yours a bar graph or are you a pie chart guy? Do you have yours up? We can open it. I've got a promo code for 15% off this program that you do right on your phone. So I think it was on the rewatchables, the promo code.

But you have to hear his rationale for it. You have to hear his rationale. You're going to have little moments where you're pissed about it, clearly. And I get why you are. But does the stepson have nothing? Does he have no money? Does he have no prospects? That doesn't mean it's right,

but maybe that's what your father's doing, being more sympathetic. I think some raw numbers would help too. You're telling us you don't know how much he has stashed away. What if it's a ton? Does that make it better because your number's bigger, which you're saying isn't the issue here? It'll probably make it worse for this guy. It doesn't make it way worse because you're like how much is this fucking guy getting just showed up on the scene nine years ago i would personally uh but again i don't i don't know the dynamic you get remarried is is the new wife like you said strong arming him here you can't let him know you saw it i would plant some seeds to try to press the issue for him to offer up the big reveal. And then I'd have an open mind about his explanation for it. And if it's,

if it doesn't make any sense, then you guys are going to have a real tough conversation. But like you said, it's kind of like what you're pushing for here is not the cash. As you say, it's the principle. It's the percentage of love yeah right you coach my teams this kid was 16 he couldn't even make junior varsity baseball fuck you fuck this guy i yeah look if i were if i were the you know the biological son versus the stepson and i knew that guy was getting half of my dad's cash and i look if i were rich it would piss me off it would it would so maybe maybe i'm a worse person than others but you've got to be delicate how you handle this you go guns blazing being like hey i opened up your document what the fuck is this noise guess who's

gonna stay at 50 this is new guy uh yeah i mean i don't know if this i don't want i don't know if you want to build this as like a succession like logan and marcia situation because you don't know if that's what it is right you don't know if it's like a sort of a power grab sort of deal or if it's just like this woman that came into your dad's life and makes him happy and so that what i would say is you kind of i heard the way you talked about your stepmom and maybe your dad knows that maybe he knows that's a deal with your sister too so maybe he's that's a deal with your sister too so maybe he's like we need to give this kid more money so he could take care of his mom if he you know later on life i don't know it's just a thought i was like maybe he just like you know

kind of was you know looking at the landscape and was like well you know i don't think kid one and kid two are thinking about stepmom when i'm gone and maybe if i double up on the on step kid one then maybe he'll be, you know, maybe we've, they've already discussed him taking care of the mom as she gets older. I don't know. It's just a thought. I really, I'm sure there's some, some explanation for it, but you know, hopefully it's one like that. Maybe it's just like, yeah, I don't really trust you to, you know, keep the care going for this woman that you said, you know, you didn't meet until you were in college. Maybe that's just what he's afraid of. Just a thought. It's oddly specific, but it was, it's just something that

popped into my head. And then the other thing that I would say is I'm a, I'm part of a blended family. We've been around each other forever since I was like two or three, but you know, I've got a, I've got a step sister, a step brother, a half brother, and there's me. And, you know, I kind of shot up the power rankings in the last, you know, six to eight years, I think. But, you know, I think there's a still a clear number one. She's, you know, I kind of shot up the power rankings in the last, you know, six to eight years, I think, but, you know, I think there's still a clear number one. She's, you know, technically a doctor and, you know, the joke was always like, oh, who's going to get the house? And the, and the joke answer from my dad and my son were like, oh, your sister, come on, she's the best. And that's like a joke. But, you know, if something terrible would have happened,

I wouldn't be surprised to find out there's a larger percentage of, you know, I wouldn't be surprised to be like, the house is going to our favorite one. And, and it's not like a mean thing. It's just sort of like sometimes decisions have to be made and, you know, I guess you could across the board do it, but for certain things, maybe there's a reason for it. That's all I mean is I wouldn't be shocked if I was in a similar situation where my stepsister got the things because she's just, she's just a better person than me. Or, you know, maybe that's not the way I should say it, but I'm just saying I'm in a blended family, and I'm sure that everything can't be 25, 25, 25, 25.

So you were fourth, you think, and maybe you're second now? I think I'm second now. In the playoff committee's eyes? Yeah, yeah. My brother's at Florida State, so who knows who he'll turn out to be. I could be back to third, but I'm definitely not fourth anymore. Your brother's in Tallahassee? Yeah.

And you don't go to visit him? I don't know. I mean, I work all the time. True. I should, you know, maybe for a football season next year, I'll try to shoot over there. No, you should definitely go.

I heard it's impossible to get to. I heard you got to, I'm just not a big connecting flight guy. No, they have roads. They have roads that go to it. Well, I just heard it's impossible to fly into Tallahassee usually. Impossible is aggressive. I'm sure I'll figure it out okay but yeah currently i'm number two so i

just mean i i kind of understand i don't think it's impossible for me to be in a similar situation but you know i love my my brothers and sisters so i wouldn't be super sore about it maybe you should get more friendly with your stepbrother dude dude. I don't know. Maybe he'll feel bad when the time goes. Yeah, look, I just think he, you know, I think we covered it. I think we're good on this. I kind of wonder, though, why, if your sister's a doctor, why would she get the house? It sounds like she needs it less than you do.

Well, it's not about need. It's just who did better? She's a new doctor, too. It's like, you you know they don't start really going in they don't start really raking it in until a couple years down the road it's big big loan to you know pot stamp didn't really break the bank for us so true i think i just thought of a great tv show inheritance and then you have real people go through their wills and then you have real people go through their wills with all the benefactors. Oh, and read it out loud.

Right. And then it's just, that's an episode. And then the, uh, then like the, the end of like the, well, what is that? The end of like the housewife seasons when everyone's in a room. So once, once it's all done, everyone gets in a room and they talk about it. No, I think each episode, I think each episode is like one family and then the guy

who's got all the cash or the woman. Maybe Kyle and I are the only ones that are ever laughing about this. I think the show's inheritance, it's one family, the main person

that has all the cash and then just a stadium seating of people wondering where they fit in. And then the person reads the will. Real live reaction, honest emotion. And then that's like the beginning of the show. That's the first segment. And then you have a Seacrest type

that goes up to like the oldest brother who's not getting the beach house right he got fucked like say there's four main characters you got the old car right and seacrest goes up to him he's like okay todd you got the firebird what do you think that didn't like look that didn't really go like didn't go the way you were expecting how are you feeling right now? Well, Ryan, you know, my family, we use the Hamptons house all the time. This is bullshit. Two jet skis? I don't even have

anywhere to put them. And so then they get chances. Segment two is one-on-ones to see if there can be an adjustment made. So then the benefactors start pitching themselves to the person and then

we close with either a new ratio split or the guy could just hold up a sign because we love signs or big logos, a big banner drops down and says unchanged. End episode. See you next week on NBC for Inheritance. Great. I shouldn't say I have a friend. It's not a down and says unchanged and episodes see you next week on nbc that's for inheritance great

now i have my i shouldn't say i have a friend it's not a past tense i have a friend denver mark he and i talked about a reality show and it was unbelievable it's my favorite show that doesn't exist and it was called forget the the title the way he said it was so much better than what I'm going to do right now. I think it's the title was it's not my fault. And so somebody who's had a rough go of it, then has to tell a panel of judges that whatever predicament they're at in life, this is like a big thing, not just the past weekend. it's a bigger picture thing where they have to convince the panel that it wasn't their fucking decisions it wasn't anything they did it was all the circumstances around them and we're explaining the debt and the court dates and the yeah right

if you can explain it all away then you win a prize with the idea being that almost everybody that would try to do that you'd have some english guy bloke who you know is mandatory for these roles because we're obsessed being judged by people with accents uh he would just go wait a minute you don't think that was your fault it could be like mega millions the pot grows every every episode right right we're up to four million dollars someone make it through an episode could you know would there even be any winners during a season be like you know i kind of get where you came to that conclusion but that's still kind of on you it'd be like oak island you're like they're gonna find something this year that's one of them's gonna win like okay i hate those shows i hate those shows so much

do they ever find anything on any of them? It's my mom's favorite show. That was a joke. And she was like, you know, they found this old nail that they think could have been from like the crusades. I was like,

Oh, they got a nail. Huh? So I don't know. I guess they find enough to keep it going. This was the first time she said, you know, I think this is probably the last season,

but she'll watch it. So. Okay. Um, last one here. This is, you know, I think this is probably the last season, but she'll watch it. So. Okay. Last one here. This is, I guess, time sensitive. How, when did we get this? Oh, it was just last week. Those can be a little dicey.

Like, can you guys please answer this? And you're like, oh, it's November. Wonder how that went. Yes. All right. Irish listener proposal to girlfriend. Oh, this is a quick one 2862 don't know my weight but an overweight lad do they not how many stone you think this guy is i've been with my girlfriend for six years lived together in london for four plus years

and i'm going to propose this year we're going traveling for six months six months plus the international kids man they get out there where does the money come from i don't know i don't know look we get all sorts of instagram yeah yeah going on trips and i'm like what the fuck like it blows my mind how much money people can spend on trips because when i didn't have any money like when i had none which was a very long time inconceivable it was just it wasn't like hey maybe i'll just go down to south beach for four days and fucking light it up i was you know you're sitting there at 28 putting the atm card in with your buddies around you like going oh no like you didn't get a receipt like i didn't want anyone to see it yeah i can't imagine paying rent for my house and my apartment

and not using all 30 days of it. I can't imagine paying a day of rent in my apartment and a hotel. Come on, you're nuts. Look, the euros are different. They're different. And I admire this. They find a way. They'll cut corners elsewhere because travel is so important to them. Look, I feel like this is more the norm there than it is here. Yeah, you're probably right. Okay, so Southeast Asia, New Zealand, Australia together. My question is, where do I propose or do I wait to propose when we emigrate home to Dublin?

Dublin sounds like a nice place to propose to. I'm going to tell you why that's a terrible, terrible idea. If you've been talking about getting married and you're going on this trip for six months, she's telling all of her relatives and all of her friends that you're proposing to her at some point on this trip.

And if you don't, it's going to fucking ruin the trip. I know recently there was a couple that I know recently there was a couple that I know and there was a trip and one person thought they were getting the ring

and they didn't. And then the guy told me she spent the rest of the trip. It was the worst trip ever because she left. She got on that plane going, when we land,

I'm going to have a big rock in my hand within a couple days and the rest land, I'm going to have a big rock in my hand within a couple of days. And the rest of it's just going to be a Aperol Spritz Nooner Fest. A pre-Honeymoon. Of love. Instead, it was sulking and bitching.

Horrible. Oh, that sounds horrible. Right. Yeah, you have to do this early. Right. Just do it early. just do it early just do it early you know six plus months that's a long time it's a long time to be in a fight yeah right and i'm not the pseudo fight yeah i would i would get this i would get this going

early because the longer you don't do it for that perfect moment could you could really damage the middle back end of this trip so i would i'm not saying you have to get on and be like, okay, you know, do you want earbuds? Oh, Hey, here's a ring, you know, land, pick out a spot, maybe research it a bit ahead of time. But I would, I would get this one going. Like if this is what you want to do, which it clearly sounds like it's going to work, but I, I can't imagine a scenario. We don't know all the dynamics of it, but I can't imagine anything here where we don't know all the dynamics of it but i can't imagine anything here where the female on this this side of it would go yeah six months from now is a good time yeah like month five you're traveling and nothing's happened there's just it's inconceivable

that she would be so locked in and like oh yeah whatever like whatever. Like could be today. I'm cool with it. That's not really how it works. So I would get it going early. And then, um, you know, you guys will probably get along a ton in the beginning. So there you go. Yeah, I agree. I think my, my fiance had dropped hints. Like she wanted some people to be there and not like, you know, like a baseball stadium, like the more people, the better she wanted, wanted a couple people that we knew to be around. Just a moment, I guess, she thought she wanted to share. She didn't say it in so many words, but she was just like,

so what do you like? If you did, what are you thinking? I joked, I was like, well, I'll just find a gas station like Jim and Pam, right? And she was like, and I could tell, obviously, that was not what she wanted, but she definitely wanted a friend or two to be there. So I don't know if you're going to see any friends,

international friends in your travels, perhaps that would be a thing. You know, if you're, if there's like, you know, good friends that you guys are meeting up with somewhere in your six months travels, that might not be a terrible thing too. But that was just for my personal case. I knew she wanted at least somebody that she knew kind of to be there. She wasn't into like the, you know, we weren't also taking any trips. So I guess this could totally be disregarded. I just knew that she wanted like somebody to be around to share that moment. And she didn't know who it was going to be, but she, you know, kind of knew there'd be somebody there.

So that's the thing to think about if you guys are meeting up with any like mutual friends that are good friends. Did you get pushed around a little bit? I don't think so. did you get pushed around a little bit? Um, I don't think so. I actually almost kind of went rogue and, uh, and everybody got, was getting really nervous.

Uh, my buddy and his sister, uh, were, were with us, um, Jim Cunningham, you know,

well, and I, I, she had just, her, his sister's got into town and I showed up like fresh off of a happy hour. And I was like, I feel like today's the day. And they were looking at me like, no, man, you can't.

No, you can't do it today. Like it's, you know, it's fucking five o'clock and you're like, you're still going. There's no way you're whipping out a ring tonight. So we went through a whole night at this Russian bar where they were like, oh, my God. Every time I went down to tie my shoe once and they thought I was going to like propose. And so I almost went rogue and they convinced me not to. And then I sort of packaged it into this nice Catalina thing. So wait.

So you were somewhere else and they thought you were doing it. I was with them. They were actually the people that went to Catalina with us. We kind of we kind of disguise it as like, oh, Jim's sister is in town. She wanted to go trip to Catalina. But the night before we were at a Russian bar and they were like, oh my God, please don't do it here, man. You're hammered. This is crazy. And I was like, it feels right. And they were like, Kyle, I'm telling you, don't do this. Everyone's going to be upset. You're not going to be happy about

this. So I was on the smoking patio of this Russian bar in Hollywood. And I went to like tie my shoe and Jim and his sister were like, oh my God, no. But it was just a false alarm. I was tying my shoe. But I spent the night with the ring in that pocket. So I wouldn't say I got pushed around.

I almost, you know, pulled the bottom Jenga thing too. She almost got proposed to on the smoking patio of Bar Lubitsch, but she didn't. How enthusiastically were you saying it just feels right? Oh, dude, it was the sun was still up at that time. And I was like, it popped into my head.

And I was like, I'm doing it. It's perfect. I'm going to say all the right words. I feel all the right things. And they were like, dude, no, we're not going to go if you do this. So I was like, you know what? I'll bring the ring and we'll see how I feel. And they were like, oh my God. But I made it through the night. And then we went to Catalina like the next day. All right. I'm glad that worked out for everybody. Me too.

It feels right to end on that note. Thank you to Kyle, as always. Ryan Russell Podcast, Springer Spotify. Outro Music you