The Ryen Russillo Podcast - Why the Celtics-Udoka Situation Is Playing Out This Way, Comedian Colin Quinn, Plus Sheil Kapadia on the Eagles, Lamar, and Brady

Episode Date: September 23, 2022

Russillo shares his thoughts on Celtics head coach Ime Udoka’s suspension, and the nuances of the Celtics press conference and coverage surrounding it (0:44). Then Ryen talks with The Ringer’s Sheil Kapadia about Jalen Hurts’s performance in the Eagles win vs. the Vikings in Week 2, the Buccaneers' offensive struggles, the seemingly unstoppable Bills, Lamar Jackson, and more (10:48). Next Ryen is joined by comedian and writer Colin Quinn to talk stand-up, ‘SNL,’ MTV’s ‘Remote Control,’ stories from his career, his YouTube series ‘Cop Show,’ and more (32:58). Finally Ryen, Ceruti, and Kyle each give out a bet for NFL Week 3 (1:10:42), before answering some listener-submitted Life Advice questions (1:15:29). Host: Ryen Russillo Guests: Sheil Kapadia and Colin Quinn Producers: Kyle Crichton and Steve Ceruti Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

okay today's podcast we start with yudoka open he's been spending the year there has to be more that we don't know we'll talk about it we're gonna talk some nfl including jalen hurts big step up to the start of this season we'll talk to some quarterbacks and also everybody loves the Bills with Shilka Padia. A guy I got to see very recently in New York City. He's been a comedian I've loved for years. It's Colin Quinn. Some SNL Day stuff, kind of where

he's at now. He's got a new show out too, which I can't wait to check out. And life advice. And our red hot picks. Enjoy Friday, folks. I've thought about this open on the Boston Celtics and EMA Doka suspension. I've thought about this quite a bit. Just like a lot of you on Wednesday night late, you're like, wait, what's going on? Woj announcing that he would be suspended for conduct for one season from the Boston Celtics, but it was vague.

We didn't know what it meant. Then as things started kind of being pieced together, it was an inappropriate relationship and then it was an inappropriate relationship with a team employee there was a bunch of different speculation on who the employees could potentially be which absolutely sucks uh for everybody uh that's female that's involved with the celtics um but at the same time too i don't know i don't know the perfect way to handle this because i've seen a lot of criticism and i'm not saying criticism is inaccurate but i also think it's a bit of a, well, you should have, after the thing that is done is done, it's, well, it should have been done this way. It should have been done this way. And we're like, okay. Um, they couldn't just fire Emei Adoka. Maybe they

don't want to, uh, I don't know what his future is, but we're going to get into that here in this open too, as well. Uh, but if they just fired him for no reason in September, then guess what's going to happen? People are going to speculate. They're going to ask questions. That's the way it works. If you were to have Ime Adoka suspended, but then also immediately name the female that's involved in this, I don't know that was going to go over all that great either.

When I listened to Wick Grosbeck, the owner of the Celtics talk this morning, there was something that was brought to their attention right after the NBA finals sometime in July. We didn't get a specific date. I don't think that's super relevant. The fact that this investigation has been going on with an independent law firm since July and it wasn't leaked, that actually surprises me. So things get leaked. It sucks. It sucks for every female employee that's involved with the Celtics. But it's unfortunately kind of the way things work. And if you have a better plan, then you should be in PR crisis because this is a really odd situation because it's so unprecedented. Because you're sitting there going, what could he have done that was bad enough for him to be suspended for a year, but he's still going to keep his job? So, you know, like anyone else,

your head starts going through all these different scenarios. Like, okay, well, he couldn't have done anything that was beyond a certain line, or he'd just straight up be fired, and they'd be done with him, and it would have been some kind of protocol, and they wouldn't even be on the hook for the rest of his money.

He's not going to resign because he's probably going to figure out, well, is there a way I can still get my money? And I think that's where the Celtics were like, if this isn't fireable, but it might be after the year is up, does that prevent us having to deal with any kind of lawsuit for any firing that was unfair? Because if it was a consensual relationship, which is how it's being reported, a consensual relationship between the head coach of the Boston Celtics and a team employee, then what can really be done because stuff like this actually happens. So this entire time, I'm left with constantly asking, is there more? There has to be more. And why would they want him around if they're so upset with him to do this. Now, there's one version of events here where it's like, well, maybe they're just totally unfair. What?

The Celtics, they shouldn't have done this. They shouldn't have suspended a coach for having an improper relationship because this shit happens all the time. Okay, but let's ask ourselves this question. Are the Celtics just idiots? Would they with a team that just lost the NBA Finals, who looks

like a terrific young head coach? I'm a Yudoka fan as a coach. I really, really became a big fan of his this season. As far as a basketball coach, I'm thinking, would they go, hey, you know what? Let's screw up our team plans here by excessively punishing a coach here for something that just sort of happens all the time.

That doesn't make any sense. That doesn't make any sense. And as Wickrow Speck pointed out numerous times, we are dealing with something that is somewhat unprecedented. So I know there's been a bunch of theories online, a bunch of different things, and a lot of the theories have been wrong, but it keeps me getting back to asking the question over and over again, what could have happened here for the Celtics to hand out this kind of punishment? And yet we don't really know what happened and that just i'm just gonna let my gut guide me here and that i think he may have fucked up man i think he fucked up

not so much that he immediately is fired but enough that it's like no no no you're not this isn't just going to be a conversation here like you you crossed the line now i remember being younger and thinking about uh you know whatever however your family grew up i think a lot of us are probably the same here as you kind of think your family's the only family with its flaws and everybody else is perfect you know the crate and barrel family like hey they've got napkins outside for just afternoon snacks that's cloth napkins and their Their lemonade pitcher's always full. Like, what the hell's going on? That's awesome. I want that. And then you realize everybody's got their problems. Then you get older and maybe you get married and you realize how tough that is. And then you'll hear stories about the neighbors.

You're like, oh, I thought they were so happy. Or maybe you have a friend that gets involved in something and you're like, hey, what are you doing? And then the friend's like, well, things haven't been great. I'm thinking about moving out or the woman I'm talking to or all these different scenarios that you run through your head where when you're a little kid, you're like, oh man, that'll never happen. This is real life. This is stuff that happens. So we don't know all the details of why Emei would put himself in this situation and why he would do it with a female team employee. But I think a lot of us that have been through any life experiences understand that these things aren't always cut and dried. There's other people that are out there misrepresenting what's going on with the relationship or not having.

And then you have the athlete part of it. Okay. This is some, not all, but some. part of it okay this is some not all but some i've always felt this that the athletes are desensitized not all athletes but a lot of athletes are fairly desensitized to what it means to have to be in a relationship not that the rest of us don't fuck around and screw up or make mistakes but when you're around it constantly as an athlete and i can just you know i'll share a couple stories like i remember talking to one guy who played in the league for a long time and I became close enough with enough guys through all the ESPN years. And I would ask about like, well, how, how, well, how does this work? Like, how,

how would this work? And be like, well, you have your wife and then you have your girlfriend. I'm like, okay. Like, is it known? Do some of the wives just kind of know the deal? And it's like, well, some do, some don't. Um, but the girlfriend part of it, like there's not really any rules. I'm like, well, what do you mean by no rules? It's like, well, if you're not married to the girlfriend, then that means your teammate can try to get with her if she wants to get with your teammate. I was like, wait, that's fucked up. He's like, well, you're already doing something wrong. So why do you have the right to have a moral standard about what your teammates can?

I'm like, this is so screwed up. Like, doesn't this start a ton of problems? And he was like, yeah, a ton of problems. And I'm like, well, that doesn't seem to be that much fun. Uh, you know, other stories about ticket guys, having to make sure that they're placing the girlfriend in a section that's away from where the wives are or girlfriends. You know, I think there's a real desensitization of, it doesn't mean you're not in love. It doesn't mean you want to say or do all the right things.

It just means you're on the road a little bit. And it means that you're operating with a different set of rules. And when you're a male or female in a position of power, people desire you, whether it's money, fame. Think about some of the things you've heard at your own workplace over the years where you're like, wait, what's going on? You're like, why would that happen? You're like, hey, you know, that person's got the corner office, you know, weird shit happens. So in that sense, none of this is that different. different but there are certain clues there are certain clues through the the reports that i've read through the press conference like even woj is on first take and he kind of passively kind of threw a quote maybe there will be more um i think i think wick was even vague like think about this they are being very uns everything is being, at least by the standards of the news outlets and the TV shows and the press conferences, they are being incredibly vague about what the

actual act was and who it was with. And I think there's a reason. I think that's the clue. I think that's the clue. Are they being vague because they're just dicks? Are they being vague about it all because they just decided in September before the season gets started to just make things more difficult and be mean to Imei Yudoka? Or is there another layer to this that, again, not in that category

where there's no coming back from, but in the category of a line was crossed and this is the punishment and no further questions. Football season is underway, so now is the perfect time to download a FanDuel, America's number one sportsbook,

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Free bets that expires in 14 days. Restrictions apply. See terms at sportsbook.fanduel.com. Shil Kapadia joins us. Always happy. I just like saying he's from the ringer now, which makes a lot of sense. His Philly special pod is out.

They tape it Sunday nights. It coming out Monday, then Thursdays. Let's start with what was pretty special about Philadelphia's offense. Jalen Hurts, that second game against the Vikings. They put up a ton of points against Detroit as well. I know that we've talked about this a lot. Let me just get your impressions from him two weeks into another year as him as a starter. Well, whenever I had the Jalen Hurts conversation over the last couple of years, always in the back of my head, it was

like, well, what is his ceiling? What's the best version of Jalen Hurts look like? And I always had doubt, like, is it going to be a guy who can play with Josh Allen and Patrick Mahomes and Herbert and whoever else you want to name here? Monday night was a version of Jalen Hurts that I didn't know existed. I mean, the way he threw the football from the pocket, outside the pocket, his decision making, his confidence. Like, I thought in that game, he attempted throws. That last year, he's not even attempting.

He's just taking off and running for six or seven yards. So I don't want to put too much into one game and I'm not going to tell you it's going to happen every week, but that version of Jalen Hurts should have Eagles fans excited and has me reconsidering. All right. What is his ceiling kind of going forward? The reason I always wondered about the ceiling was, you know, look, I'd watched him clearly at Bama because I like college football so much, which I still think is this weird kind of like Pickens, the receiver for Pittsburgh is a perfect example of this weird college football divide where the people who love the NFL and like think that liking college football is stupid. Be like, oh man, this Pickens like it's like, like yeah but all of us like it wasn't the smoothest sailing at georgia man wasn't smooth there's a reason why other teams were like we know how talented he is but we're not all the way in on that so hopefully it all works out it works out

for pickens but it's it's just every time pickens makes a play and he was you know he had that unreal catch um against cleveland it's just kind of this funny thing where it's like oh man everybody's really stupid like i started watching this guy a week ago and you guys that know the whole backstory, like I'm not going to listen to anything that has to do with college. So anyway, I don't know if you had more on that, but I'm just ranting a bit. Yeah. No, it's not, it's not even just like analysts, like the NFL, it's just, there's so, there's such an arrogance about the NFL. Like every draft season, oh, this guy only ran, you know, a limited route tree or or oh my God, this guy never

took snaps under center. And it's like, dude, you are an NFL coach. Your job is to coach the player and help him do things he didn't do. And yeah, they just come at it. And it's like, you are not the 32 best coaches in the world, the 32 coaches who coach in the NFL. There's a lot that goes into it, politics and ego and everything else. So I'm with you there. Yes, I always try to check myself. I love college football. I kind of just follow that as a fan and sit here on the couch Saturday and don't write about it. But yeah, I'm with you there. Not everybody is stupid just because a guy looks that talented. Yeah. Okay. All right. So we're on the same side there. And I guess the big thing with her, it's like a lot of college QBs and

why I wondered where a ceiling was as an NFL starter, was it felt like it was a lot of one read and then run. Week one, I think there was a number that came out of design dropbacks on passes. He pulled it down over 20% of those dropbacks, which is the highest rate in the NFL. I don't know what it was because he didn't need to do it because everyone was wide open. It's the best game I've seen from him.

It makes you go, all right, it's one game here. How much did Minnesota's defense and the receivers, what did that have to do with it? But it just felt like there was a command from him. So this is something now where usually I think year one, year two, we have a good read on who the younger QBs are going to be. And granted for him, this is only a second year as a starter. So we should all have a completely open mind about it. But that felt different. And I'm with you. It just felt different in a way of like, wait, do I have to kind of read? Because I think we've all been operating as if the idea is

that he's eventually just going to be replaced. And that's probably unfair. Well, by the way, the team was sort of operating that same premise. Honestly, I mean, you know, you can even look at last offseason after he had his full season as a starter. You say, hey, they went nine and eight. They exceeded expectations. They went to the playoffs. But the organization didn't have its eyes closed to quarterbacks who were available last offseason, whether it was the Russell Wilsons or the Deshaun Watsons. It was more of a case of those guys weren't in play for the Eagles, then the Eagles weren't in play for those guys, if that makes sense. So I think definitely the organization, they traded a pick to get the extra first rounder this year. They had their eye on the future. Basically, let's give him another

year. If he surprises us, great. If he doesn't, we've got a great roster around whoever's playing quarterback and we can make a move after the season. And I'll even go back to when they drafted Jalen Hurts. I mean, now there's this narrative that, oh, they saw something, they just wanted to take another shot on a quarterback. I mean, I can tell you definitively that that pick was about getting a backup quarterback on a cheap contract for Carson Wentz. It was not about finding a starter if things go poorly for Carson Wentz. I mean, there'll be some revisionist history. There always is with this kind of stuff, but that was their reasoning for making that move. And even after Wentz cratered in 2020,

they weren't like, okay, let's hand the keys to Hertz. Their preference was to keep Wentz with a new coaching staff and run it back. Wentz wanted out. And so they made the, don't get me wrong, they made the best of a bad situation, traded him, got compensation for him. But now there'll be all these sort of wrinkles that, oh yeah, they saw this coming all along where what you just said is really how the organization, I believe, has felt also. Yeah, I love that stuff. I mean, the teams that always want credit for telling you after the fact

the guy they didn't draft they had a lot of interest in. Oh my gosh, yeah. Like Peyton recently on the Patrick Mahomes. He goes, you know, we actually... I mean, it happens in the NBA all the time. It's like, well, you know, had we done this?

It's even like the Lamar Jackson thing. Baltimore, I think, had three chances to draft him before they actually drafted him. So, you know, you pulled it off, but your evaluation isn't nearly as high as you were selling it to people after the fact, because if it was that high,

he was still at that point. And we're talking the second half of the first round, and they kept trading out of the pick. And then they took a tight end. They took Hayden Hurst. They took Hayden Hurst over, like, looking back, you would be like, what is going going on there yeah so i i'm absolutely with you okay um does it does it turn out that because i was thinking about wentz the other day and i was you know he had a couple of those wentz plays and it's also an easy thing to fall for when you look at his overall stat line and i brought this up earlier in the podcast.

If you looked at his stat line, just the stat line. If you didn't even put Wentz next to it and saw his stat line for 21, you'd go, hey, that's a pretty good quarterback. That's pretty good. Takes care of the football. But the monumental mistakes that he has, and the fact that Indy had him with those stats without much of a plan, the Matt Ryan part of this hasn't been great.

I don't know if there's a ton of help around him. Now that you're so plugged into the philly thing do you have people that are more willing to share the wentz part of this the personality part of it because there were rumblings but it feels like if he was at indie for a year and they were like get this guy out of here uh you know i'm starting to believe more theories is my point yeah i I don't think that it's necessarily that he's a bad guy or that it's like, oh my gosh, this guy was a disaster. We hate this guy. I mean, I just think if you look at his career and you're absolutely right. I mean, I don't know that there's a bigger divide between a guy's stats and actually his performance when you watch him play

than Carson Wentz. I mean, if you look at his career, four out of the last five years, statistically, he's like a top 15, top 20 starter, which you would watch him and go, no way. Like I've seen this guy make too many mistakes. He is a back end starter. The numbers would say differently. I think just personality wise, I think he's never shown an accountability, a willingness to correct his mistakes. I mean, the issues he has now are the issues he had three years ago. And that's ball security, that's presence in the pocket, that's making the layups with his mechanics on those short and intermediate throws. And then like you said, he'll unleash a couple bombs a game where you go, okay, I could see how you could get enamored by this guy because that arm is live and he can chuck it downfield and he can get you back in the game in a hurry. So he had those injuries early in his career. I mean, if you remember 2017, before he got injured,

he was a guy who could make plays outside the structure of the offense and break the pocket and make those second reaction plays. He still tries to make those plays, but physically he's not the same guy. And so now he's running into offensive linemen. He's taking safeties. He's taking intentional grounding penalties. So performance-wise, he's probably like an okay star, I would say around like the 20th best starter in the NFL. But I always fear that when a guy hasn't shown that ability to improve

kind of those fatal flaws that he's always had, then what are you sort of doing here with them? The Eagles are good then. It appears that the Eagles are good good then it appears that the eagles are good and it appears that they prioritize with a young quarterback making sure they get some guys that gets a separation i mean that's all davante did in college like he was just open he was i thought he was the best route runner out of the more heralded physical players that were his teammates and then you bring in aj who's a complete difference maker. This is, I mean, they have really good skill players and it just, people think I'm a Pats fan. I'm not.

I just look at some of the positional spending and I go, okay, if you add it up, because I was kind of going, hey, well, if the Pats don't spend money on this, they don't spend money on this because the Patriots actually have, I believe, if you look at their quarterback salary, you know, they're $6 million total for that position. I'm like, okay, well, they don't spend here. They don't spend there. They don't spend on running backs. They shouldn't spend on running backs.

I was like, they don't spend on wide receiver. Then I was like, wait, let me check up their positional spending. They spend the third most on wide receivers. The Patriots do. If you're an Eagles fan, and granted the Smith contract allows you to work this, and some of these numbers can be moved around a little bit,

or if you're any of these young quarterbacks, you're like, okay, the quarterback number is nothing on the cap. Why can't you spend it? New England, their wide receiver and tight end spending this year,

I'd argue, I think is number one, the most that's spent in the NFL. That's worse than actually not spending based on what that roster is. Like you're, cause at first I'm going, oh man, they don't have, they're not giving Mac Jones any help. Look what the Eagles are doing. Look what Miami's doing on the Tua contract. Like, look what these other teams are doing, going, we have the first round contract of

quarterback. This is a gift from heaven for those three or four years, really more three, but let's spend it somewhere else. And I'll watch a Pats game going, well, who are they spending it on? And then I realized, oh my God, their cap hit combined for tight end wide receiver, arguably, again, the cap average annual salary money spent out. It's a massive number is my point. However much you want to move the decimal points around.

Yeah. I mean, I thought that was not to be like, oh, everyone saw this coming because we all get stuff wrong. But when they were spending 12 and a half million on John Smith and Hunter Henry, 25 million a year on those two players. I mean, I was making the joke that Belichick was like a teenager who got the credit, you know, sign up for the credit card in college and like, wait, I can just do whatever I want with this because they had cap space for the first time. But like you have to spend it wisely. And what you just said, you watch the Patriots. Who on that offense, if you're an opposing defensive coordinator, I always think about it this way. It's Monday night. It's Tuesday. You're game

planning. What's my plan for player X in this game? Play the Patriots. I mean, there's literally nobody you really have to worry about there. You can just be like, okay, we can play our stuff. They have a competent quarterback. Their offensive line can be pretty good. But in terms of those skilled position players, you just don't have that. And compared to the teams you just mentioned, I mean, the Dolphins, you're going, all right, well, are we doubling Tyreek? Are we doubling Waddle? Where are they going to line up? They're moving those guys around the Eagles now. I mean, the Eagles hadn't had this for a long time, but like AJ Brown has just looked phenomenal. I mean, he's going to beat press coverage pretty much every week. And you

mentioned it with Devante Smith. I mean, I watched that game on Monday night and Devante Smith against zone coverage. He just has such a great feel, such great instincts of knowing how to get to those open spaces, those open voids. Like if Devontae Smith were on the Chiefs or in a pass happy offense, like I was thinking even his rookie year, I mean, well, he would have had what, a hundred catches for 1200 yards. The guy would have been totally going off. So he's in a run first offense. But the point is when you face teams like that, now you're putting defensive coordinators in a bind and now you have to deal with Jalen Hurts as a runner, which is something you don't have to do every week. So when you're building

out your offense, that's always the key to me. I know it's easier said than done. Those guys don't just grow on trees, but you need to have some reason for defensive coordinators to be concerned on a Monday night and a Tuesday when they're game planning for your team, stuff that they have to account for. And I would agree with you. The Patriots don't really have that at all right now. Yeah. Once I started checking the spending part of it again, too, I was like, you've got to be kidding me.

Okay, let's talk a little Tom Brady. The deep throw numbers aren't great. Maybe it's the first week back, and then it's the Saints history, which is just very weird that this really good Tampa team since he's been down there has such a hard time you know you chalk it up maybe to divisional familiarity but he's had the second shortest time to throw on drop backs according to PFF but the actual fourth deepest average depth of target but on those deep shots although he had the huge one that was the game changer

against the saints this past sunday the overall numbers are below a lot of other quarterbacks you would explain again two weeks in but the o-line problems if there's ever been a quarterback that i've seen in a grand it's because i watched all those games when i did care i've never seen anyone better at figuring out how to play around a struggling offensive line. I mean, of all the things Brady's great at, the best thing he's done is, all right, what's my O-lines? What are their capabilities this week? Oh, okay, they're struggling.

I will now adapt to all of this and make it work. And clearly early on, it's been an issue. Yeah, I was looking at, there's this stat called success rate where I like looking at it early in the season because it just basically looks at every play statistically. Was it a positive or a negative? So like you don't get weighed down by 50 yard plays or really negative plays. The Bucs offense is 31st in success rate through two weeks ahead of only the Giants, which I had to look at that like 10 times to make sure I was seeing it right. So just on a play-to-play basis, they are not sustaining drives. They're not moving the football. I'll be honest. I feel like Brady's arm looks fantastic. I'm watching him, that touchdown he had last week. It's just like, all right, Brady's not the problem here. It's the supporting cast. And it goes to what we just mentioned. I

mean, supporting cast absolutely matters. And so they're on their third string left tackle. They're down three offensive linemen. Godwin was in, then he was out. Julio Jones was in, then he was out. Now Evans is going to be suspended. So I was thinking like if Gronkowski wanted to come back, I mean, he gets 17 targets this weekend.

If he wanted to play, I don't know if he's going to come back or not, but they really, I just feel like need some more weapons or guys to get healthy. And so I'm not overly concerned about Brady right now. I think what you're saying is absolutely true. And he knows how to help that offensive line. His, his, you know, drop back is going to be the same 95% of the time that really helps offensive linemen. They know exactly where he's going to be. He gets rid of the ball quickly, but it's not dink and dunk. He's chucking it downfield with anticipation. So to me, this is just like survive

the first four or five, six weeks of the season for the Bucs. And they've got a couple of tough games coming up. So they could be, you know, two and two or whatever. But once they get at least some of those receivers healthy and back from what I've seen from Brady, it's like, in this NFC, I think they're going to be okay. I think there'll be weeks where the offensive line shows up

and you'll go, wow, they're getting manhandled this week. But overall, I still have them as one of the teams that'll be left standing when we get to second, third round of the playoffs. What was your Super Bowl pick? I had the Bills beating Tampa. I know I went chalk. It's boring.

It's pathetic. But I was looking for that sleeper in the NFC and I couldn't get to one. And I picked the Bills in the spring. So I'm like, you're probably going to regret coming off this. So that's what I had. Has the public,

whether it's media or whatever, has the public ever picked the same team as much as we all pick the bills to win the afc i don't even remember the last time i heard somebody pick someone other than buffalo yeah yeah it's and especially in the afc like you could pick five or six different teams in the afc i thought about the chargers i think i had the chargers in the afc championship you know what i love the chargers. I think I had the Chargers in the AFC championship. You know what? I love the Chargers. Yeah. And I was like the Chiefs, but it's like, yeah, the Chiefs, it was like, you're not really, you know, people try to convince everyone they're going out on a limb picking the Chiefs. It's like, settle down. You're picking Mahomes and Reed. You're not really going out there. So you would have needed to pick like the Ravens

or the Bengals or somebody for me to really think that you were going out on a limb there. The NFC was where I thought, man, I need to find a team. Like I thought about the Niners. I thought about the Eagles. I said, I said, if I wasn't so close to this Eagles team, like if you put another, if this were like the Atlanta Falcons, but the same team as the Eagles, I'm going to pick them to go to the Superbowl. But I'm like, I can't do that.

You know, my dad, friends, they'll be like, you're cursing this team. How could you pick them to go to the Super Bowl, but I'm like, I can't do that. My dad, friends, they'll be like, you're cursing this team. How could you pick them to go to the Super Bowl? So I didn't want everyone around Philly to be mad at me and overhype their expectations. Yeah, I picked Green Bay, whatever it was, Rogers, even after week one. I was like, okay, we'll see what happens here. But I picked Buffalo like everybody else did because it also felt right, that disappointment in the Chiefs playoff game, feeling like if the coin toss goes our way, can that be this driving thing? You know, maybe it's not quite as dramatic as the end of the Spurs heat thing. But, you know, some of these things get played out as motivational storylines.

And sometimes they can just turn into fiction because it sounds cool. But the Spurs one was very real. Like they spent that whole next year pissed off. And that's how they went through the season. And they had redemption and they beat the Heat in the rematch. And so, again, the Bills-Chief thing, not quite as dramatic as the Ray Allen three to turn a series at the very end of it. But I think that's another thing that we're all kind of buying into. And by the way, like just watching them and everyone can go default, well, what about the health?

Hell, they're already missing a couple guys in that Titans game. And I'm not exactly Captain Tennessee over here with the years. I haven't been the biggest Titans fan, but it's still a good football team. It's well coached. There's talent. And they mauled them. I mean, that game, that score could have been worse. And you're watching it going, how does any sane person watch buffalo play

and go now i'll go i'll pick somebody else knowing that you know there's a good chance we're all going to be wrong here but based on what we're seeing and the depth and the lack of questions uh and who josh allen has become it's it's it almost feels impossible to watch them and then say no i want to pick a different Yeah, they can win in so many different ways. I mean, it's like, you know, the passing game is great, but if it's not working, he'll just make those second reaction plays and make something out of nothing. Defensively, you mentioned their corners have been totally banged up. I mean, they haven't gotten Tredavious White back.

They just lost another corner last week. So they're not healthy there. They're so well coached defensively. I mean, they play a lot of zone coverage and zone coverage is, hey, everyone kind of on a string, knowing what to do, moving together, recognizing those route concepts that you're going to see in a specific coverage, not leaving those huge voids in zone. And they just do that better than any defense in the NFL. And so they can rush with four with Von Miller. You know, you don't need to blitz a lot. I think they barely blitz all this season. I think week one against the Rams, I don't think they blitzed one time against Matthew Stafford and you would watch that game going,

shoot, Stafford was under pressure the entire game. Like if you can do that, you're going to have a shot. So you're right. I mean, it's two games in, so there'll be other AFC teams that come along and the Chiefs will look great. I think maybe the chargers will the Ravens. I know they lost last week, but I feel like Lamar, that was a fantastic game from him and their passing game was really clicking. So I think there'll be some ups and downs,

but you look at the bill schedule and man, they, they look like they've got a pretty, pretty good path to get that number one seed. I'm glad you said that about Lamar. I thought that's one of the best games I've ever seen from him against Miami. Yeah. Because it was a combination

of how he was beating Miami. It was the precision on some of the passing. And that game's headline completely shifts from like an all, like every single thing you'd want from Lamar. You know, because I just felt like he was, I just felt like he was really in control of what he was doing the entire game. And I thought he was just really, really tight.

And then all of a sudden, you know, your defense blows everything. They can't cover anybody. And now Baltimore's defense, you're starting to wonder. A carryover from the end of last year into this year. You know, I was looking at some of the defensive EPA stuff. I think week 16 or 17 of last year, it's one of the worst games they've ever had under Harbaugh. And then this game was arguably the worst defensive game they've ever had in a couple decades.

So, Shiel, where can we read more of your stuff? Let everybody know, promote everything here so I don't get anything wrong. Yeah, writing my picks against the spread every Thursday on the Ringer, which is really just kind of a league-wide thoughts every week of what's going on. If you're an Eagles fan, you can listen to the Ringer's Philly special twice a week. And then I'm on the Ringer NFL show twice a week, Monday night with Ben Solak. And then Thursday, I bring a different guest to you. So all over the place on the Ringer. All right, cool.

Yeah, when the Flyers get going, I'd love to jump on. That's right. Listen, I need an expert and it's not going to be me so that sounds great thanks you all right take care i'm really excited about this just saw him recently do some stand-up colin quinn uh he's going to hang out with us for a little bit. So Colin, I know normally the way these podcasts work. How are you doing, by the way? I want to say hello. First of all, this is my favorite entrance into a podcast ever. Usually it's a hair

pile of nonsense and this is great. I like it already. Just the fact that we're right in there. All right, good. So what do you ask of me now? Well, normally I know the guests would usually talk more and the host would kind of just tee you up so maybe you shouldn't compliment me too soon but i want to tell you a quick story so august i go to a comedy cellar new york city i go whenever i'm

through town and i went to book the tickets and there's some bullshit thing that happens where it redirected me because it was sold out to like a different place a mile up right so i show up with my phone yeah i show up with my phone and the guy's like dude you booked it at the other place it's like a mile away i'm like well how long is it going to take is it 20 minutes you're going to miss the start of that show whatever i'm like so what's the deal here he goes we're sold out i was like all right this kind of sucks man like i'm not a total idiot i book tickets here before on my phone something happened like what do i do he's, I don't know what to tell you. So I go around the corner, I'm thinking it all out. And then the dude comes up to me. He goes, Hey, uh, he goes, I'll tell you what, if you give that guy money, he's just

going to let you in. I was like, okay, no problem. I was like, how much money? He's like, how much do you want to give me? And I was like, no, you got to come up with a number first. The guy's like 50 bucks. I was like, all right, I only got a hundred on me. And the guy's like, how much do you want to give me? And I was like, no, you got to come up with a number first. The guy's like 50 bucks. I was like, all right, I only got a hundred on me. And the guy's like, no problem. We'll take care of it. So I walk in, it's all shady. I hand him a hundred bucks.

They bring me down to the table. No one ever sees change again. They just, they just took my a hundred bucks. So I'm pissed. I'm a little pissy and you don't want to be pissy at a comedy show. No, no. And this is where I bring you in. You showed up.

You just kind of showed up. You crushed, you were workshopping some stuff. So it completely changed my mood. You saved my night. So I wanted to thank you for that. I was pissed off for about 15 minutes because I did get hustled. My pleasure. That's great.

That's really weird. How does that work, though? Because I don't know that you were you scheduled. I love this unknown thing about comics. You are. Okay. Well, I'm always scheduled. How's that?

What's that mean? That means I call up the book or Esty and I say, I'm available. She goes, are you available this weekend? I'm like, yes. Usually I'm available most of the time, which is not flattering to me, but that's how it is. So then I just go in and then she puts me in. She goes, come in like this time. You're on schedule.

And I mean, you can Google it. It's on the website. But a lot of times people will cancel or some people will be surprised guests. Okay. They'll show up. But I don't show up surprised. It's on the schedule. All right.

So what you did do, though, is you brought notes with you and you just kind of told us, hey, I'm working on some stuff. And it crushed. But it was awesome because the first seven minutes you were talking basically about don't be your real self. And it was perfect. Right. Yeah. Well, that's my new thing. I'm glad you brought it up because that's what I've been working on now is personality.

Like my new show is going to be about personality and what it means. You know, historically, I always like to bore the crowd with historical stuff. You know what I mean? I don't do a lot of sex. I don't like't like yeah i don't do a lot of sexual stuff you know you're from massachusetts you understand we don't talk about that kind of thing so i talk about history and personality and what it means dynamics and governmental and you know that kind of stuff it's interesting you know once you once you start talking about once you start thinking in those in any terms that leads you down that path right i mean it's like sports if you're thinking in terms of like today i was i was watching uh something to do with something to do with yankee the yankees

kid erin judge anyway they're they're players wives because they're trying to market it to women i feel like all these sports so they're focusing on the because they're trying to market it to women, I feel like, all these sports. So they're focusing on the wives. So all the wives are on Instagram, hey, outside the stadium, having drinks together. And I can just imagine the publicists for the teams going, listen, would you guys have a drink together? We just want to put it on the Instagram.

You guys are friends. Like, well, not really. I don't know. And then the next thing you know, they're all – but they like it too. You know, it's a little – but it's just so interesting when you look at anything from any angle because then you start delving into like i didn't think about the publicist on a sports team you know what i mean like yeah it's interesting stuff too yeah i think what was what i really liked is you just found and grant like sometimes with with comics or

anybody like hey i had that thought or whatever it's like yeah but how did you execute it how did you execute it and you were just on this role of like nobody wants to actually know your real self like if you came home and somebody said hey how's your day and then you ran through everything if you actually gave people the real advice like if you did a graduation speech where you just started saying half of you will fail if you did the stuff that people think they want nobody would actually nobody would want what they were actually getting yeah because real is jackass it's rude and it's jackass behavior you know i mean and some of the biggest jackasses i've met in my life a long time is the people go, I'm a straight shooter. I'm, I'm going to be

real with you. And I go, Hey, how about be real with you? Start with that. Then we'll worry about you being real with me. Be real with you first yourself, you know? And, um, so yeah, it is kind of, but it's like anything else you start thinking about it and you start going, Oh, and all the things that are there, they start to be noticed once you focus in on a particular, whatever it is, you know. The other thing you did when you were on stage is you kind of caught yourself in a moment where it wasn't clicking and then you just called yourself out.

That happens every night, by the way. Yeah, but you called yourself out. You're like, hold on. And you go, let me check my notes. You checked your notes like i'm glad i checked my notes and then you crushed for another two minutes to me that now you've been doing this for a long time but to me that's like the level that you get to where comfort becomes your biggest asset like what is it about once you are so comfortable that you don't even care it

actually makes you better at your job and certainly better as a comedian well thanks but i was always i was always uh somebody that was used to like i expected a lot of bombing like that's part of comedy if you really want to work new material every job i mean you know it's you have to be willing to really bomb a lot you know like that's it only it's in front of people you know they always go you have to fail but we fail right in front of everybody it's kind of embarrassing but you can't fail completely because people paid money to watch a show and laugh but they have to accept that if you don't want to see the same thing every night i can memorize my original act and just go up there you have to let people there has to be a little room for failure in there you know when you started

out i remember you know being in high school and the first time, you know, like, who's this guy in remote control? You know, he's funny. He just gives people shit the whole time. I just smoked cigarettes with the best. I smoked cigarettes. I was a chain smoker and they let me smoke on the air. But you, I've heard you tell the story that you became, I mean, here you're on MTV every day. You're on this show. We didn't have a ton of options. We're all watching it, and you were great on it. But you're a stand-up comedian.

You're a New York City guy. And now you're going out to do these events. And did people, how weird was it? Because you're still seeing yourself as a comic, and they think you're the smart ass from MTV. Yes, it was very weird. It was uncomfortable for all parties concerned, but you just kind of go along with life. But yeah, I would get up there and do stand-up.

But luckily for me, this was right like 1988, 89. So stand-up was still in a space where people were like, hey, somebody's doing stand-up comedy. That's kind of interesting. Like if I tried that now with my status, the whole audience is more stand-up, you know, like knowledgeable. So they'd be like, wait a minute. What's going on? You know, if I was doing the material I was doing back then, like then it was still a novelty.

So people weren't as aware. So they were just kind of enjoying, oh, this guy's crazy. He's doing stand-up. Now people are like, my cousin's a stand-up. I did it for three years. That's, what's he talking about? So I got away with a lot more than I would have if it was a different,

if there had been different cultures, you know? I heard you talk about Sandler once where you said it actually took him like a year, year and a half to figure out who he was. What does it mean when a comic's figuring out who he is or who she is? By the way, that's a great question. To me, that's a great question because I was just thinking about it last night because I saw somebody. I almost asked them, how long did it take you to become yourself?

Because when you start stand up, you're sort of doing a character and you're trying to be funny. And you're in certain areas, maybe not like the way I'm doing right now, but you're pushing. It's like anything else in life. Like if somebody's, if you're trying to meet some girl, you know, you're a young guy, you're going to meet a girl and you try to be like a cool guy instead of yourself. There's something off about it. You know what I mean? You can't pull it off. You're being fake, what we talked about before, but a bad kind of fake. And so with standup, it's the same thing. You're up there trying to be like, yeah, I'm going to tell you people what's

up or I'm going to be the crazy guy or I'm the funny guy I'm the guy that doesn't care and then once you just really don't care and you yourself and you're like This is all I have. This is all I have my personality There's not more coming and I'm working from me and all my jokes, but you're not gonna get like a magic You know, it's not gonna to be John Wick or whatever. You know what I mean? This is all I have. Then you can really be funny, you know?

So I, uh, I don't know. I don't want to sound mean. Um, and it's not about you, so don't worry about it. Uh, where I know how hard it is, right? I know how hard like my job is, or whenever I listen to people that are writers or directors actors actors they're all super complimentary towards each other and sometimes i might be in the car going yeah all right i think you're overdoing a little bit like this person's all right you know but yeah but i think it's this mutual support because everyone that's in it knows how hard it actually is that you find yourself maybe being over supportive just because they're

fighting the same fights you are career wise well yeah i mean it's tribal too like anything else where people are like you don't people are going to criticize because it's just look you're every business whether you're a cop or a nurse everybody thinks they're going to tell you something that you don't know about your business you know what i mean yeah so if you go to a nurse, everybody thinks they're going to tell you something that you don't know about your business. You know what I mean? So if you go to a nurse and go, hey, you guys should do this, they're like, they probably talk to each other and go, how about when they ask us why we do that?

They don't understand what we studied in nursing for four years. They don't get it. You know what I mean? So it's the same thing with comedy. We like, people don't understand. If it was up to the audience, who's the hacks and who's the good thing with comedy. We like people don't like, like if, if it was up to the audience, who's the hacks and who's the good comedians, they would have a totally different opinion from us.

You know what I mean? So that's the other reason you do it. We'll defend because you're like, okay, even if they're right on this one thing, I'm not going to get, plus it's in bad taste to talk about people you work with. You know what I mean?

Like to, I mean, nowadays everything's revealed. I know it's in bad taste to talk about people you work with. You know what I mean? I mean, nowadays, everything's revealed. I know it's a different culture. But I'm just saying, you don't go, you know, you don't go, yeah, because you have access to them on a different level. So if I was going, yeah, this guy once said this, or, you know, she was doing comedy, but she was really, it's like that's, you know, what kind of person is that, too?

You know what I mean? Okay. So that leads to this question. Can you be friends with another comedian that you think is really not funny? I mean, not close friends, but I can, I can accept, I mean, I can accept them, but I can't, uh, yeah, you can't be close friends because you talk on the phone. If you're not, if you're not laughing, then, you know, that's the way it is, you know. Yeah, that's what I mean. I would imagine that would be really hard.

Like, you know, Dave's a really great guy, but God, I don't get any of his material. And then let's go do something this weekend. I just think it would be really hard. Yeah, no, I mean, it's, well, it depends. Yeah, it depends. But, yeah, in general, I would I would say no your friends are more people you have to like what they're doing or else it's hard to be around them because

I always wanted I would like to be in charge of comedy anyway and just like tell everybody listen you have to go in this direction but comedians don't like to be told what to do that's why they became comedians it's kind of a weird so you can't even with other comedians if you give a comedian a great line for their act and it's perfect and you want to use it or they want to use it, even so it still makes you upset because you're like, I don't want to use somebody

else's act joke, even though it's for you. They only thought of it because they watched you. It still pisses you off when it works. You kind of hope it doesn't work even though it's perfect. So you you how different is it from comedian to comedian about writers like writers yeah oh my god i mean it's completely different i mean i'm like i i'm like a hoarder i have so much like on my computer right here and on and with notes i'm like a psychotic if you saw if you saw my

computer you saw my notes you'd be like he's crazy like he's a lawyer there's something wrong so i write everything down and my phone even my phone has hours of material it's crazy but then other people like i write on stage i'm like oh you know i mean like i can't do like, you know what I mean? Like, I can't do like that. You know what I mean? What about writers for you? No, no, no writers. You don't have any, but do, do. No. It's just. I hope that.

I mean, I don't think anybody is going to, anybody has writers. I mean, I guess they help them with stuff, but I mean, uh, I don't think they would have just writers writing like the old days when they would do like just being a comedian back then. You just get a bunch of joke writers. It was great. All you do is perform. But I mean, no, I feel like it loses some of that magic. You know what I mean? If you're not doing it yourself, you don't feel it.

You don't feel it. You don't feel it. Or what do I know? Maybe other people do, but I don't think they do. No. How much pride do you have in the fact that every comedian talks about you with real reverence? That you are the comedian's favorite comedian? Because that's the scattering report on you.

Well, that's great. I have total pride. Me and David Tell, by the way, they say. David Tell, too. I have total pride. Me and David Tell, by the way, they say. David Tell, too. So, yeah.

I mean, it makes me so happy. It's the best part of my life in the business. Because the rest of the business, I probably wouldn't even have it. I'd be booted out years ago. It's only comedians are basically, you my salvation so i mean thank because here's the thing when the comedians say he's great then people in the industry can't fully ignore you because then they look like they don't know what they're talking about yeah right right but then i imagine too like you know i don't know uh we just met today but you know you're you're around so many

people that have had a big movie or they've had all these different things and you're like, hey, this is cool. Everybody thinks like I'm the standard, but damn, but I, you know, I'd like my grownups. Well, yeah, of course. I mean, yeah, and of course there's always, you're

always going to be, the grass is always green. You're always going to be envious of people who have more money than you. I mean, I always am. I'm like, what? I want my thing. You know what I mean? But that's not the way it shakes out. You got to accept reality.

But yeah, of course, I feel like, hey, I want that. That's how everybody feels, I guess, about something. Yeah, no, look, I think that's just a completely honest answer. I'm surprised whenever somebody tries to convince me they think the other way. You know, like it doesn't mean you're rooting against people, but it means you're asking yourself questions. No, it's just, yeah. Yeah, I'm greedy. I want things too.

One time I was on set with Adam Sandler. Now, forget about just grown-ups. We're doing some reshoots for grown-ups. And I look out, and I've known him since he was 17. I knew him when he first started, like I said, before he was even funny, before he found his funny thing, you know, and

his real self, you know. And I was on the, we were looking at this, and I'm on a hill with him, doing some outdoor thing. And I look down, and it was like one of those, like, you know, like, you ever see, like, when Richard the Lionhearted brings his whole army and his caravans and his tents? It was that big and that impressive.

And I was like, you son of a bitch. I go, look at this. This is all from you. I mean, it had to be like millions of dollars. It was a lot of pressure, too. But I'm saying, when, Michael, look at this. This is all from you. I knew you when you were a little kid.

So it's really interesting, like what he, you know what I mean, and people like that, you know, the Kevin Hart, whatever, that they have this setup where they're responsible for all these people and all that money too. So as great as it is, you know, it's a lot of pressure too. They have to deliver because this thing, you know,

these, all these people, can we make it a living because of you? Can we do, can we do that? Cause I want to get to some of the SNL stuff. Can you do, you know,

again, I want to talk mostly about you, Colin, but like first impressions, first impressions on some of the people that came up with you, your generation. Is that cool? Sure. Like, so Sandler, first impression.

Yeah. My first impression was that he's like a little wise ass kid. You know what I mean? Like, he's just, you know, he had his little friends to his credit. Those friends still work with him. He's loyal to them to this day. And I was like, you know, he's cocky. You know what I mean? He's got a certain charisma, but then, you know, but I was like, nah, he's not really a great comedian. But he went on the road

by himself for a year, just did the dirty work, paid his dues while he was still in college he went on the road and he came back and i go oh boy he's so funny it's because he relaxed into himself so before that he was trying to be funny he was 17 but when he was 18 he came back and he was just himself and he was so funny and charisma and you know people kind of knew he had a star quality, but he was himself. He wasn't talking loud. He was almost quiet. You know, the early Sandler material is, if you see him on the early letter, he's just like, yeah. So, yeah, he's talking really low.

And it's funny because it's him, you know. So that was my first impression of him, yeah. What about Farley? Well, Farley, I mean, I didn't know him like those guys knew him, but, I mean, he was such a, I mean, he was such a nice guy and such a, you know what I mean? Like, he was a guy that was like, I almost felt like when we hung out, he was just always like, I'm trying to get it together.

And I was like, ah, he was such a great guy. Like, like so, uh, and it was just, it was, you know, the last time I saw him was horrible, you know, he was on the show and he just looked like it was, it all fell apart and he was just in a panic state. And he was never like a mean guy. You know, I'm sure he had plenty of episodes where he was mean being high, but, but he was just like, it was, it was terrible.

It was terrible to watch because he was clean for a long time. You don't realize like he was clean for a few years. Like he was totally sober for a couple of years. And, uh, and then he went back out and that's when he died. But he was before that he was like, he talked to me so funny as anything. So funny and so committed like, you know, even when you watch all that YouTube stuff like him in there, when letterman brings him out, and he just goes down the aisle, grabbing people and doing flips.

But he's not just trying to like be like, hey, like me. He also likes people. So when he's grabbing the guy, you feel like he's not just using him as a prop. He's like a people person. Yeah, that's a great point. He would just grab people, and it looked like the guy was having the worst time, but at the same time, it was like,

I can't believe Chris Harley's grabbing me. Yeah, he wasn't just grabbing him to mess with him. He liked people you know uh the spade thing i think is always kind of funny because every one of every one of the guys from a certain generation all seemed to really like him and i'd heard him in a different interview and they were asking about his background he's like well i was a waiter and i was like a real pain in the ass but he goes i think i was actually he might have said bus boy wasn't even a waiter and then right the people at the table be like hey you know it was some seafood restaurant they were like you know what can you tell us about the shark he's like i have a deal with the sharks you know they don't eat me and i don't eat them and then you get fired right because the guy'd

be like what's going on and spade tells the story he's like what are you talking about i'm killing out there right it's like right right right And thinking of him being the exact same person all the time makes me laugh just having him tell his stories. And it seems like you're pretty close because of the SNL stuff in there. But just some thoughts on a guy that seems like kind of a lifetime friend for you, too. Well, him and Norm, one of the best times of my life, speaking to grownups, we were in Boston. We were staying at that really nice Mondrian Hotel. And so him and Norm, one of the best times of my life, speaking to grownups, we were in Boston. I was staying at that really nice Mondrian Hotel. And so him and Norm were there. And it was one of the best summers of everybody's life.

Sandler got everybody together. And we all, all of us from Sandler, everybody says that was like the summer. It was such a beautiful time. We were laughing the whole summer. But but him and norm back and forth. I mean, you want to do I wish they'd done comedies together because no one would be like, just randomly like, we'd be in spades room. And then no one would be like, Hey, and the door would ring and he's like, What happened? And the waiter would

walk in with like five steaks and like all this expensive lobster. And it's been like, what happened? You're the wrong woman in with like five steaks and like all this expensive lobster. And Spade's like, what happened? You had the wrong woman. He goes, no, I'm going to go, no, I thought you wanted to order some food before you said you were hungry. And then he's like, no, I didn't. And he would just be like, no, I was like, well, you can't send the guy back now. And he was just sitting there. And he would just do stuff all the time, like this crazy over-the-top stuff.

And Spade, you know, he's so funny at the throwaway where he's like muttering under his breath and he once told me because i was he goes i was a little guy so i couldn't come right out and just insult the big jock guys i would have to say it under my breath and make all the girls and the guys on the sidelines laugh so that's his style developed by being small too and so he's very funny at that like throw away like yeah that's great and so that's that's what makes him funny in my opinion is that he was the guy that was just when you think he's not saying it like instead of once again trying to compete with some in high school with some big jock. He grew up in Arizona.

And he would just be like, okay, well, that's great. And just sort of underplay things. And that's his nature anyway, but it suited him well. So the SNL years, mid-90s for you, I've heard you talk about it. I've read all the books and whatever, because a lot of us from the outside i cannot imagine how frustrating it is to write something and have people constantly pass knowing that you're good enough to be here and then wondering like wait is there some formula where it's you know like i'll just admit like there's certain there'll be certain tv shows that are on and I go, who the fuck laughs at this stuff? Right. But then I'll go,

wait, this maybe isn't for me. You know, maybe I'm in this minority lane of, of what I think is funny. And then when you're a comic who kind of, you know, your angle on things, you're like, wait, is this just not, it's, does it need to be dumber? Does it need to be more for the masses? I can't imagine how frustrating that is as a young writer on that platform thinking like, hey, everybody out of my way. I'm ready to kick some ass. Oh, yeah. I mean, there's a lot of writers that got destroyed by that place.

But it also teaches you so much because you're putting it up every week. Even if it's not getting on the show, you're at a read-through with an audience every week. So a lot of writers got some good lessons we get the lessons from stand-up which is audience doesn't laugh and then so that's the beauty of stand-up is we get those lessons of like hey you wrote this thing you think it's great and the audience doesn't laugh so that's what we learned but for writers that place was the best education it was like it was a boot camp because they're writing their sketches and then they're putting it on and go this is funny their friends are laughing

and then they got to go in front of the jaded art department that's been there 25 years the props wardrobe and everyone's sitting there and everybody wants to laugh you're sitting there anyway they're not trying not to laugh you want to be entertained you're stuck wednesday afternoon these stupid treats. Everybody's eating in those days. It was like Rice Krispie Treats. And you're just kind of not in the mood. But you have to sit through this 80 sketches.

So if you get people laughing, you feel great. And if you don't, you got a good lesson, which is you can't even complain about, like you said, your audience. Because that was live. These people work with you. They want to laugh at every sketch. They want to be entertained that afternoon. So if they're not laughing, you got to go back to the drawing board. So it was very good in that way, you know?

And, uh, and obviously SNL, look, we all have our complaints about what goes on and how could it not work, but it's the same. It's the same. Everything's the same. How could it not work? But it's the same. It's the same. Everything's the same.

Like, I look at the Knicks and I go, how could a team be in New York all these years? I was alive when the Knicks were great back in 1969. I listened to the championship on the radio and then the other one with Jerry Lucas like three years later. And so, like, and I'm saying how could the Jets, for that matter, how could these teams be in the epicenter of all the biggest success in the world and be mediocre all these years? How can that be? But it's just, I don't understand what goes on behind the scenes. So if you explain, if I walked up to a coach and said,

you know what the problem is? They're like like you don't know what you're talking about we did that six times you don't understand the way well we understand so it's you know it's the same thing with shows like SNL you know it's very frustrating

and we all look and go they should have done more on my stuff but you know that's part of the nature of life you know. Do you have a story of just a sketch you wouldn't quit on you just kept bringing it back oh well i have a few i mean i'm like everybody else i was like but one of my big it's funny you said that because it was a sketch it means guy steve higgins wrote steve higgins and it's called uncle it was about buttermilk pink it was a it was a voiceover guy who's like hello kids like

one of those nice new hampshire uncle john's buttermilk pancakes for the family you know you get these so basically the sketch was the guy comes in there and they go ready to voiceover say yes uncle john's buttermilk pancakes and they got cut and he goes okay hold on a second and you see he's in the booth doing the recording of this beautiful, just imagine an ice cream, a covered bridge. And he's got Coke. He had a hooker in there. He's bleeding. He's crying. And he's going, God, all right, hold on. Okay. Hey, everybody. Uncle Joe. And he keeps going back to that, but his life, you know, with the hook, he's fighting. And there's blood coming out of his nose.

It's just like this decadent, psychotic guy. But he's this voiceover guy doing it. So I don't know why, but we tried to do it with Robert Duvall. And he was offended. He was like, what are you doing? It was just this deviant sketch. But anyway, so Duvall was offended. He wouldn't do it.

But then Phil Hartman came, and he did it, and it was so funny. But I forget why it didn't get on the air, but I think they were just afraid standards and practices was like, in those days, they'd be like, could you lose the bloody nose and the hooker? And it's like, oh, well, you know what? You just killed the sketch. It had to keep increasing in decades. So that was one that was mine that I was very disappointed about.

I'll tell you one that I didn't write. This guy Scott Wainio wrote it. And it was called, remember when Ben Stein had that you win Ben Stein's money? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So it was win Ben Stein's money. He had money. Oh, yeah. So win Ben Stein's money. You have money.

And that's what the plot of the show was. You play for his real money. Yeah. So this guy wrote a sketch called F Ben Stein's White. And it was basically, okay. And whoever played Ben Stein, deadpan, like Ben Stein, talking like this. So monotone.

And you get to sleep with my wife. And it was over here. And his wife said, why are you doing this, Ben? Why are you doing this to me? Because I can feel no emotion except when we do this. The genie's out of the bottle. I can't put it back in. So it was like six kids.

And, you know, a lot of times in read-through, the people that would laugh at it would love it and the other like half would love it half be horrified by it you know just you know but it would just be on comedians always think everything the more the more insane it is the more we think it's funny you know but that was another sketch i always remember that i wish it would have gone on the air f ben stein's wife there's there's got to be you know because you would read me like okay this person was hired as a writer first and then they became a player and then, you know,

whatever feature and all this kind of different things. How, how tough was that when there would be writers that would be in there for that reason? I mean, I remember being at ESPN and I'd be like, why does this person take this job? And they thought it was going to like,

that's, that's way more absurd than the SNL path. But you'd be like, do you think this is one day going to tap you and be on the air? But I imagine there were writers that were, there's just like, Hey, you're actually just going to be a writer here. Well, that was, I was there for that reason. I mean, I was hired as a writer. I was hired as a writer,

but my friends at the time kind of helped me and they were like weaseling me into the Canada. So I really can't complain about it. But I mean, yeah, of course, everybody wants that. Everybody wants, you know, the thing. But the truth is, it does affect things. It shouldn't be that way, probably, because it does affect motives. Because it's the same thing with stand-up. When you hire stand-ups to write for a show, and I shouldn't say this, but we always have great stuff, in my opinion.

But also, if something's really great you're gonna talk it for your ass at least i always did i worked on living callers right i worked at snl i worked in a couple other things and i was always like wait a minute that joke needs to be in my ass if it's really good i'm like giving it to them and you know that's not fair you get paid to give it to your best stuff but you know I duck it down alright last couple things here as we finish I think the thing that I would always look

at with some of the sketches I'd be like it's just that hard to end it right on the right beat because a lot of times it would just be like hey just somebody fall on a fucking table and then we'll go to the next sketch it's just so hard look it's hard to end scripts it's hard to end finales for seven seasons of a tv show you've got to come up with

50 landings or you know during you said 80 during pitch week 15 maybe make out whatever it's just so hard man it's just so i stopped i stopped going well that wasn't a funny ending i just stopped doing it because i was like it's that hard just stop getting upset about it well the problem i think the problem yeah fall on the table is hilarious that really is the only ending that ever you know is gonna work and a lot of times these sketches be so funny and it all fit perfectly but then the live crowd and that live crowd is not right up front. Most of them are upstairs. So it's not a great room where everybody's vibing.

You know what I mean? Like you know what he's done? So there's some seating, but most of us have to. So, and then moving props around and sets. So to get that laugh, you almost have to have a commune, a commune. Uh, you have to be together with the audience. So I feel when you're doing any kind of comedy. So if they're not right there, then that last line,

you're right, many sketches would work with us. When they would read through, those things kill. People go, that's a perfect ending. But then something falls and then it's just in dead air and you're like just cut and it makes it even though the rest of the sketch can be great it kind of takes it away a little bit because people

glass memory you know so that's why there's a lot of table smashing a lot of table smashing and by the way Uncle John's buttermilk pancakes we had a big ending. Just imagine a guy in a booth coked out of his guard. He's got blood coming out of his nose.

I forget what the ending was, but it was some big ending that was even bigger than that. Either he shoots himself or I can't remember what it was, but it was pretty severe. Wait, Robert Duvall didn't want to do that then, also shoot himself. We're like, we'll save this for selling. Well, that was the other thing anytime you save something for a host you're like i know the perfect host i'm not putting it in this week i'll save it for this one it would always fail because you jinx yourself that host would just be like i don't like that you know i mean whatever it was you know uh who is who is your favorite host you ever had? Sting.

Wow. Yeah. Is that because of your personal preference of what he's done? Yeah, because he did the sketch. He just went along. He was funny in the sketch. And there was less pressure on him because he's a musician. So when he's good in something, like, hey, he's great.

And he sang. And just everybody loved him, by the way. All the guys loved him. The girls loved him. Everybody loved Sting that week. They just loved him. He's pretty good in Dune. The original Dune. And he was in and produced Lock, Stock and Two Smoky

Barrels. I love that movie. Love that movie. Remember, he's in that at the end. I forgot about that part. He was the producer he's the reason it got made and

don't forget the other movie he was in uh his first movie was The Face uh The Who

uh Doctor Who no no I'm kidding you know The Who did it's an old movie but um I know there's a weird one in there.

You're right. I'm going to have to go look these up again now. Yeah, it was like... Not that kids are all right, but it was one of those other movies about the mods and the rockers starring the Who. Quadrophenia?

Quadrophenia! It was Quadrophenia! God, yeah. I wouldn't have remembered that at all. I just remember the... I mean, I remember the album or everything. Yeah. To avoid our own table breaking here, I want to, I want to have, you tell us about Cop Show on YouTube.

I want you to promote everything you have and then, you know, we get you. Have you seen Cop Show? I haven't. I just got the heads up for it now. So I'll be honest with you. Here's how I feel about Cop Show. I feel like when you watch it, you're going to want to interview me again because

Cop Show is really fun. Well done. It's basically because I was never on Law & Order. I was never invited on Law & Order. I've been in New York this whole time. So I wrote my own Law & Order. So it's basically me doing Law & Order.

It's like 24 episodes. Seinfeld's on it Chris Rock, Jim Gaffigan everybody, Michael Che Amy Schumer, everybody's a guest star but it's all 76 minutes episodes, it's painless it's fast, but after you watch it, you know what I mean

you're at least going to want to call me and talk to me and I can't say I blame you I didn't want to want to call me and talk to me. I can't say I blame you. I didn't want to lie to you. I just got a heads up on it. I'm on it. I'm going to watch it. We'll put the link to the interview behind it too as well so it'll all be there. Look, man, I just want to tell you that night was like a reminder

of the great ones. I don't want to take away from anybody else that was in the library because there's some really good comics. Even the guy at the end I think was so high that he admitted he was so high and he started doing African bee impersonations talking to each other a father bee and a daughter bee and he knew he was losing his mind and luckily it'd been a really great lineup so everybody was lubed up they're already two or three jinx and it was such a weird experience because he was like I can't believe I'm still fucking up here

type of thing. But your set was incredible and it was awesome and it kind of was like a full circle thing for me. So it means a lot to me that you came on the show, Colin. So thanks a lot. Thank you so much.

Thanks, Ryan. And great talking to you, man. Before we get to life advice, we're getting to our FanD picks here make sure you check out fan duel for all your same game parlays and uh it appears uh even though the show is red hot still now through a few weeks of college and pro football that's rudy maybe isn't going to go 100 this season um you knew as soon as you said all i need is the vikings to win tonight and i've won another three-leg parlay by adjusting the numbers around.

As soon as you said it, everybody should have just hammered Eagle's money line because you were so... I'm not making fun of you, but these are the laws. This is the way it works. Well, in my defense, that wasn't my pick. That was Kyle's pick. Yeah, I wasn't going to correct you.

I am too. No, no big deal. You won against Rudy? I did, yeah. I can't keep track of the hotness. I'm sorry. So, Kyle, did you say say all I need is this? Yeah.

And then I was like, and that should be no problem. And so that's exactly when. But I found a new secret. Just like Sruti has a secret, I have a secret now. Dudes have secrets. I love this. Okay. Is it 22 and 4?

No, we're 5-1, basically. No, no, no, no. We're definitely better than 5-1. That's actually inaccurate. 22-4 is a joke that we're going to say every single week, but 5-1 is inaccurate. No, it is 100% accurate. Yeah, I'm the one who fucked it all up.

So, yeah, I'm the one. Oh, on this part. Yeah, but I'm saying I'm including some of the earlier picks that I had at the beginning of the year. Oh. No, I'm telling you right now because all of our picks, if you do a parlay, that's one pick.

You know? I'm aware of how it is. We've only made three picks. That's what I'm saying. We've only made six picks. He's saying outside of the segment, he's been saying stuff like for other... Oh, you're just hot. Yeah, I haven't been paying attention to how those turned out. So if you have, I would trust you. Yeah, no, no. That part isn't a joke. That part's real. We don't I haven't been paying attention to how those turned out so if you have I would trust you yeah no no

that part isn't a joke that part's real and I tried to correct Suri midway through it he was so convinced I was wrong he was just snow plowing through me trying to be like no no we had to do other we had to do other shit because you've had people tweet at us about this and I'm like alright yeah we probably fucked that up because he might be doing the parlay thing

but alright my bad I'm not counting are you fucking kidding me did I just get the up. He might be doing the parlay thing, but all right, all right, my bad. I'm not counting. Are you fucking kidding me? Did I just get the internet yesterday? I'm not counting a parlay. I'm not going to argue about this anymore, but for anybody that thinks I actually thought of parlay when you hit it, it's like, oh, 3-0.

Like that would be, that would be, I don't know. I'm not going to say another person's name, but I can already guess. All right, so why don't we go this way? Sir, you can go first, Kyle, then I'll finish it up. All right. I'm going to go back to the well. As everyone knows, I've been doing all spreads and all totals.

By the way, I had some people tweeted me last night. They got screwed because of that last touchdown. Yes. It's not going to be 100%. I'm not telling you it's going to be 100%. But we're definitely well over 60, approaching 70%. So I'm with the buffalo bills minus a half a point so basically the bills just have to win all spread and i'm gonna take the under in that game against the dolphins of 60 and a half points that gets you about even money minus 106 i don't know how that loses just saying there we go uh the original line uh depending on where you're seeing it,

on FanDuel right now, I believe it's Bills minus five. I've seen it minus five and a half. All right. My new secret is going to be that Carson Wentz is going to start every game by losing and then going to lose, but it's going to come close. So I think that at least for one more week, I'm going to take the over in a commander's game.

It's going to be Washington, Philadelphia. I'm taking the over, 47.5. I think Philly's going to win, and when you put those together, it's plus 154. Okay. I like it. Some heavy public plays. Looking for those. Ravens almost 80% of the bets against the Patriots.

Lay in 2.5 or a far more significant field goal at new England. That's, that's a tough one there. Cause all of a sudden it's going to be like, well, the Patriots may have found an identity here. Maybe that Ravens defense is a total mess.

Maybe it ends up being a little bit like Tua against the Ravens could be cam against the Seahawks with the Pats a couple of years ago. Whoa, wait a minute. Does that mean Russell is not sold on Tua? Is that what he just hinted at? Perhaps I'm just making an analogy. Bills, Dolphins,

big public play on Buffalo. Not surprising. The Chiefs won that Cerruti had mentioned earlier. Only 70% of the bets. I think all of us would have thought that was a little bit higher with how the Colts just look like a complete mess. But that's not the one. I can't believe I'm doing this again this week, but this

is the way we're doing it. 87% of the bets have been on Cincinnati at the New York Jets the Jets are getting 6.5 I will take the Jets plus 6.5 so that means back to back weeks I'm taking a heavy home dog against the Cincinnati team

and I don't like it. I didn't like it last week and not only did they cover they won outright so good luck. You can get all of this at sportsbook.fanduel.com. You want details? Bye. I drive a Ferrari 355 Cabriolet. What's up? I have a ridiculous house in the South Fork.

I have every toy you could possibly imagine. And best of all, kids, I am liquid. So now you know what's possible. Let me tell you what's required. Life advice is lifeadvicerr at gmail.com You guys still saying dot com a lot?

I don't think there's a newer one, right? No, I just, you know, we had a run there. I remember dot tv was going to be the next thing. What was dot net? Was.net something different, or was it just like if lifeadvice.com was taken, you could just try.net? Pretty much.

It's not like an edu or a.gov. You don't have to be some sort of special thing. You could just have a.net. I think you could. Remember Dunk.net? Shaq had that. How's that company doing? I'll Google it, see if it's still around.

Yeah, Google. Let's see if we can get some shirts or something. Some beanies. Alright, moving on. Well, that was the tech portion of the podcast today. Yeah, nope. You can buy Dunk.net right now if you want it. From a shady company.

By the time we're done taping this, consider that domain purchase, folks. Don't even bother. We're on it. Gentlemen, one of my younger brothers is getting married this fall at the bachelor party after some cabin in the woods camaraderie and tailgating culminated with our crew of 14 guys walking into Lambeau Field on Sunday evening for Packers versus Bears. Jesus, that is a great. Like, hey, you think this train stops here? No, it doesn't.

A couple more towns y Yonder. Our seats were all together in one row at the top of the bowl. Uh-oh. And, gall darn it, the whole stadium spread out before us as the national anthem ended. It felt like that flyover was just for us.

Okay. I wasn't there for the flyover, so I don't know. You saw the game. We put the ball in Aaron Jones' hands despite some excitement with that goal line stand, the Packers were in control anyway late in the third quarter, some major action right in front of us, here's

what we were able to reconstruct, two couples in the row right in front of us, two separate couples not two couples together, blonde woman in a Jordy Nelson jersey with her man in a Bears jersey. Then a big dude with his feisty brunette girlfriend. Feisty brunette.

We didn't see it start exactly, but for some reason the two women were each other's faces because of the perception that one of the women was flirting with the other woman's man. Tale as old as time. Ain't it? Blonde Jordy Nelson's man leaves disgusted by it all. He told her, quote, you started this shit.

Now you're just going to sit there? Coward move. Can't leave your woman like that. I agree. Now Feisty Burnett has direct access to her target and gets right in Blonde Jordy Nelson's face. The move where you put your face two inches from the other person's face and as you yell and move your arms all around with angry gestures so contact is imminent at

any moment. Yeah, I think we know that move. Oddly, Feisty Burnett's boyfriend, who was an absolute tree trunk, was doing the weakest job I'd ever seen him holding back a 5'2 woman. As somebody who's had to escort 5'2 women out of a bar, it is not as easy as you think it is. Sneaky difficult. it is sneaky difficult it's fucking

really hard wiry dexterity is high yeah oh the guy you know every now and then we'd like put a guy in the door jam on accident yeah um you're not gonna do that no female so you can't be as aggressive as you'd want to be, but yeah. The hardest thing to get out of the bar ever is a five-foot, plus not five-foot four. Maybe the five-foot four or six-foot guy reconsider after he hears this. The power, the raw power she has. I had no idea

that low center of gravity, some real Reggie Fish type shit. Okay. All right. What am I talking about? Stay on target. So he's doing a terrible job of holding her back. She's 5'2".

In full disclosure, blonde Jordan Nelson easily could have moved away. There was plenty of room or just left, but she was holding her ground, almost asking for it. These women were on the verge.

What should we have done here? Stand back. Let the train wreck proceed. Enjoy our front row seat for a lady on lady fisticuffs. Some of our group were cheering for that. And I will admit part of me wanted to see it too. Or interfere. Physically separate the women.

This of course has its risks. Touching angry women we don't know in public. Maybe getting one of them to turn on us. Or worse yet, getting the feisty br Burnett's tree trunk boyfriend pissed at us. Was there another approach? Would love your take. Okay, time out. Before we answer this, there's no other ending

here. We don't know what actually happened. These women were on the verge. Full stop. What should we have done here? So we don't know what happened? Did one beat the shit out of the other one?

Like, that's... My guess is nothing happened, and we're left to assume that. What was a really good email is a C. Sounds like for future reference, should we do something? We didn't do something this time. Were we in the wrong?

Talk about bad SNL endings. I mean, God. Well done, Kyle. Brought all the way around like John Mulaney. Yep. I think you'll end up losing way more interactions getting involved with strangers than you will end up winning. Yep. I don't like watching the videos of people beating the shit out of each other and all the sucker punches anymore i used to like watching it i don't now i don't know if that's just being

older i'm not saying i'm right i'm not saying you're wrong for watching it i just think they're fucking really bad for the most part just dudes jumping in to kick the one person when it's clearly already over and so uh i've had moments where I've seen stuff happen where you're like, should I, should I go in there? And it's like, what's going to happen? Like, there's a way better than 50% chance that you're going to get punched for trying to do anything to help somebody else out. Um, and then when you add in the female part of it, like, what are you going to do? Get physical with a female as a stranger, trying to say that you were, you were trying to have peace. And then if the boyfriend or husband, they're not going to like that.

And if they're drinking, they're definitely not going to like it. They're not going to be like, hey, cool, stranger. You pulled my girlfriend or wife away to keep the peace. Great job, row 26. It just doesn't really work that way. So I'm not saying it's awesome watching people um have this stuff happen but you know look at all the videos there'll be the one guy who like stands up and puts his arm out he's got a hat on maybe like a dorset jersey and he's going like hey you guys calm down that

guy always ends up covered in beer rubbing his forehead 45 seconds later in the video folded over the bleachers yeah kyle I think unless you're like a police officer or a fireman or a EMT or something like that, I think there's nothing. What about a ninja? I think there's nothing.

Well, I'm thinking employment-wise. I think there's, other than that, I think there's nothing wrong with just minding your own business. Unless there's like a person that's like literally getting beat to death

and this is going, I think there's nothing wrong with just the defense of I was minding my own business too. You know, because I think you're right. Like even if you are trying to get involved and, and then now you're on world star and you accidentally mush this woman in the face by trying to stop it. And it looks way worse than it was. And now you're the guy in the dolphins Jersey who like, who the hell is this guy? It was just two Ravens fans fighting. And now the dolphin guy pushed this woman in the face by accident. Like there's just so many ways things

go wrong. You don't know who anybody is, what kind of shit they know. I think it's great to just mind your own business. Yeah. I mean, clearly, Jordy Nelson's significant other, that guy, he's probably seen this before, and he just didn't want to deal with it anymore. So why does that become now your responsibility to take care of this? I'm with you, Ryan.

If it escalates to a point where like someone is like really in danger, all right, maybe. But until that happens, I'm just, I'm sitting this one out. Yeah, I don't. It'd be great, but nobody's going to listen to you. Nobody's going to listen to you. You know, doesn't mean you're sitting there cheering it all on by not doing anything, but I don't know.

When I watch these videos, the guys fight each other in the stands. It's a stage of my life. The last thing I would be doing is going, hey. I mean, you would have to. I would have to get married, have a kid, have that kid before be sitting next to me and then have something happen to that kid before I would try to go tornado style into that mosh pit. You know, it's a sneaky. That's a long to do list is my point. Go ahead. You know, it's a sneaky, annoying a lot that's a long to-do list is my point go ahead you know it's a sneaky annoying move though it sounds like she was kind of pulling off some

some version of this when there's like a fight happening or an altercation or like there was recently an airport video with this happens in the nba all the time where like somebody is just like sitting there going i'm not touching you with their hands up there i'm not touching you i'm not touching i'm not touching you but you're clearly like in their space and you are fucking with them like you're like that's such a dick move i i hate that move so it sounds like jordy nelson was maybe doing that where she's just like in her face where she's close enough obviously whether maybe there's any contact but you're clearly wanting to start some shit the idea you're not a fan not a fan yeah not a fan because you are instigating even though you're like oh i'm innocent i'm not touching you

like you know you you're the instigator here yeah feisty brunette is the one that did the, I'm not touching you. I'm in your face. So there you go. Okay. Yeah. No, just, you know, in case there's any legal ramifications from this. Yeah, I don't like that one either.

It's just, it's kind of like the, when somebody tweets something that's very obviously about a subject and then somebody calls them out for tweeting about that subject in a very vague way. then somebody would be like how did you get that out of that you're like because i have a fucking brain that has oxygen like i have context clues yeah be like oh how did you never said anything about that how'd you land on that like because it's super fucking easy to tell exactly what you're doing yeah you brought it up dude okay another

reason to mind your own business on the internet right there. There you go. There you go. Perfect. Okay. Let's talk about money and how much money everybody makes. A little different, so I want to do this one. Salary transparency. Hello, Kyle. Hello, Seri. Hello, Ryan.

No problem. Our guy's 29, New York City. Living it, man. Six feet. Oh, this guy's 29, New York City. Living it, man. Six feet. Oh, this guy's killing it. 186. Used to box in college a bit, but after neck and back problems

combined with some wrist ligament issue. Like, Jesus. Falling apart, dude. Yeah, you must have really boxed. So he's all taken the toll. He's got some more pronounced loved handles. I don't know why I went past tense there. Maybe because I want him to get rid of them. There you go. Boom. so he's all taking the toll. He's got some more pronounced loved handles. Uh, I don't know why I went past tense there.

Maybe because I want him to get rid of them. There you go. Boom. 186. That's border on skinny fat, man. Six feet though. 180,

188, 180, six feet, 188 love handles. That's kind of, that's kind of skinny fat. Honestly, I think skinny fat's the worst of all the body types.

I know everybody talks about this dad bod shit. Cool. Yeah, no. Awesome. All right, we'll work on it. So, all right, let's move on. I've been fascinated with the recent trend of salary transparency across social media

and more recently being written into law. Several states, including New York, now require companies to post salary ranges when they have a job listing. Okay, the job listing is far different than knowing what the dudes to your left and right make, right? Correct. So that's not a law.

But when somebody gets hired though, right? I mean, you could be like, well, that guy's making at least 85. So I started a new job in May and while I got a 65% salary increase, this guy's fucking mad about something. You were making nothing before then. That's what that means. Right. Yeah. No, it's pretty. I remember I was making a hundred. My first year at ESPN,

I made a hundred dollars an hour, but a hundred dollars an hour for the time I was on the air. So if I did a three hour show, I made $300 and that's fine. Whatever. I would have done it for free. They knew I would have done it for free. I was paid what I was worth and paid what I deserve. But it's a really, really low rate, especially when you're driving back and forth. And sometimes I get a hotel that I would pay for the first year on my own because if I had back and back shows, it just felt like I don't want to drive back and forth to Bristol. So after gas and the hotel, I may have been putting a hundred bucks in my pocket. it was such a low rate that at one point one of the assistant managers was like, hey, we're going to bump you up because they knew it was bad. And I was like, okay, cool. What are you going to bump me up to? And he's like

$125 an hour. And I was like, oh, okay. And you're just, you know, we're going to say, hey, well, I'm going back to local markets, brother. See you guys later, Bristol. You're just going to say yes to it the whole time. And I think you could tell that there was some slight disappointment because you get called in an office when you don't even ask for a raise.

It's like, hey, do you want a raise? I'm like, yeah, I'd like a raise. I'm like, what is it? Who's better off just asking for one? And he's like, hey. He goes, you just got yourself a 25% raise, mister. So, yeah, percentages can be misleading. And you're right, Kyle, to call it out.

65% bump. That's like interns. He was an intern a couple of months ago. 29. 29. He was probably making something unless there's some bonus structure. I don't know.

So anyway, I love not talking about the email today. I'm worried. I may have even undercut myself a bit. First world problems, I know. All right. Yeah, he's aware. Okay, cool.

Now I'm trying to use the new salary transparency information out there to gauge whether or not I should try to ask for a bump to meet my perceived market value. Anyway, curious, the three of your thoughts on salary transparency, obviously, unless it's public knowledge, nobody would expect you to share yours on the airwaves. But if a friend or colleague asks you about yours or a vague range of what you make, would you share? Critics of salary transparency say if you could weaken productivity or say it could weaken productivity across the board when people find out they make less than others and could lower morale. It could also lead to pay flattening and then distort the relationship between pay and performance. Thanks for all you do. Okay.

A couple of different theories on this one. Thanks for all you do. Okay. A couple of different theories on this one. Before I jump into it, just on the critics of it all, usually the critics of salary transparency are the people that hand out the salaries because they don't want you to know that this person is making all of this to the person, that person makes that much. I'm going to start sucking at this job now. Yes, there are people that are wired there that way. I think there's other people that are wired. They're like, fuck this. I'm going to start working harder. Maybe that group is smaller than the previous group. But the problem that I would have is the uncertainty with the lack of salary transparency, just the rumors that go around any place anyone's ever worked with multiple people all making different levels of money. That shit's already bumming people out whether they know it or not the guessing game can lead to a lack of lack of productivity so um where are you on this kyle and then you steve and then i'll probably tell a story that goes way too long after so friends i'll tell any of my friends that i don't

work with what i make they they want to know i got no problem with that uh at at work how much do you make well hang out with me maybe you'll get the answer yeah good answer because i had i had you're quick today man i expected you to say well i can't do that and i was like i guess we're not friends but you jumped me you jumped me on the punchline yeah so well done it's a big joke now so yeah that who cares? No, you're just so locked in today. I might just hang up and let you guys do the rest of it. Um, so then there was, you know,

there was five people, none of which who are now at my place of employment anymore, who I would share my, we would take, well, what are you making out? What are you doing? How long you been blah,

blah, blah. But, and everyone else, nobody would ever ask me that I work with now. And there's nobody I would ask. So, um,

I'm back to kind of square one, but yeah, there was a few people that we talked about. Well, what's going on with you what do you think she makes i don't know you haven't asked her no i'll never ask her either but so i'm now at the point where there's no one that i would ask and no one would ask me but there was a time when i had like five people that we would regularly bitch and moan isn't there a company that does this now isn't it called like fishbowl or something glass door and literally i don't know something like yeah glad where you just go in and dot net i don't know if yeah dot net definitely uh super official uh i am i've never done it i feel incredibly uncomfortable

doing things like that it's probably to my own detriment it's not good i've talked about this before i'm a terrible networker as well like i just don't do things that are probably good for my career because i'm like a little bit scared i guess i don't know i just i don't do things that are probably good for my career because I'm a little bit scared, I guess. I don't know. I don't like the awkward conversation of that. So do you, if you're comfortable asking around or seeing what's up, then by all means. I mean, some of your coworkers might be kind of offended and weirded out by it. But I've never been cool with that. So I would say I'm just going to be like, hey, this is my salary. And if it sucks, it sucks.

My bad. I was big on it with on-air people all of us telling each other how much we made i thought it was important i thought it helped all of us um i wouldn't necessarily call it a union but i just thought it made more sense like hey if we all kind of know where everybody else is at the problem is when somebody ends up destroying everybody else in the salary then they don't want to tell anybody because then it like leads to different things i usually had a pretty good gauge but i I would also tell somebody. If somebody asked me, like, hey, I'm offered this much. What do you think? Sometimes I go, yeah, it's probably

pretty good. Or sometimes I'd say, I would fucking make sure you don't leave the office today and get that. Or I'd go, that's a pretty bad offer. I would be like, but again, your answer to your offers is far different than what i perceive um you know whatever somebody else is making like when i was at espn i knew there was like a collection of of salaries that once i kind of found out about them like towards the end i just went hey this person's double me this person's tripled than me i mean you know and it was just met with the person on the other side of the desk just kind of shrugs and goes yeah sorry dude you know, and it was just met with the person on the other side of the desk just kind of shrugs and goes, yeah, sorry, dude. And I was like, well, cool. I'm fucking out of here. And that was kind of it for me. Cause it was like, I was still being offered a salary to stick around, but I was just

like, okay, I can't, I can't now continue to do this because it is starting to bother me. Although my dumb ass would just work harder. You know, I'd be like, oh, this is happening. We'll watch. I'm going to do this. But when people would ask me how much I made on the radio side that were on air, I would tell them, okay, I'm in a negotiation. I'm doing this or whatever. Like when Canel was going through his thing, I'm like, well, I'm about here. And then you make that what for TV. So to make up the difference, probably to keep us around, like, this is probably where I think they'll, they'll come at you. And this is, this is how much they'll offer. And I think that's probably fair if you bake it all in.

And then a lot of what's fair, what isn't is do you plan on being at this place where there are long term goals that are actually obtainable and it's worth all the bullshit in the beginning, which for my career is definitely the case. So I think transparency can be a great tool for a lot of people, like maybe in your group. I wouldn't post it on Instagram, but if you think it helps everybody kind of understand how it works and you can be professional about it. But I don't know. I think it's hard to not have it get personal at some point. So some people can't do it. Like I remember there was one person that was asking me, I got offered a college game day. That was the radio show that was seven hours, but really it was like a four day commitment because I'd fly out Thursday, do the show Thursday or do fly out Thursday, do the show Friday with Van Pelt,

then do a seven hour radio show on Saturday. And then I fly back to Connecticut on Sunday, hopefully in time to watch enough of the NFL games to be back for the show on Monday. I made $1,500 for that show in 2008 where I was at, I'm like, even then I was like, this number sucks. But I wanted the show. I wanted to travel. And I wanted to try to show that I could do something a little bit more on my own out of Scott's shadow. But I still did it for six years and they never changed the rate. And then somebody else was coming up and they go, hey, how much did you get for that show? I go, I'm going to tell you right now, I get 1500.

I haven't done well on the contract stuff here. You should try to get more. Maybe you'll have a little bit more juice. Maybe you don't need it. I needed it at the time. So maybe if you don't need it, you'll get paid a little bit more. But I would tell that person because I thought it was helpful to them. I thought it was helpful to somebody else in the industry, even though I wasn't really close to this person. And then actually the irony of that was I found out that person was a total piece of shit and started telling everybody how much he hated me. And here I was like, I'd never done anything to the person. And I was going out of my way to be like, I make $1,500 for that show. That show you don't make a ton of money on. And then later on, somebody was like,

hey, you shouldn't do that person any favors.. And then later on, somebody was like, hey, you shouldn't do that person any favors. Like that person hates you. I was like, oh. I was like, what? I was just jealous because I'm getting better opportunities?

Yes, was the answer. So the advice for this guy is like know who you can talk to this about. Like I wouldn't like, you pretty much know at this point who you can or can't

talk to this, talk to about this. Great point, Kyle. Great point, Kyle. Again, this is one of the best podcasts you've ever done. You're right. That's the point is share it with the people you want to share. that. It's a great point, Kyle. Great point, Kyle. Again, this is one of the best podcasts you've ever done. You're right. That's the point is share it with the people you want to share.

Now, somebody's still probably going to burn you. There's going to be somebody in that group that maybe doesn't like you that much. But if that means you're getting a little information or more information than you had before, then that kind of works. I'd ask you this. Are you mad that you're not getting every single last dollar that you think you should get based on some other comps that you've heard? Well, if you do that game, then you're going to be wasting a ton of time your entire career because there's always going to be somebody else that's just making a little bit more that you think you're worth more than. And you might be right, and there's also a chance

that you're wrong because it's just the way we see things through our own lens. So if you're worried about getting every single last dollar, I would say put effort into something else. Whereas if you're getting destroyed, even with a 65% raise and you're finding out like, wait, I actually got killed on all this. Well, you know, you'll have to find out the right time for you to make that play. But the critic on the transparency thing, the people above you are always going to tell you not to say anything because they don't want to deal with it. They're not thinking about you. They're not thinking about you. They're not thinking about you. It's actually a pretty insulting thing that'll happen where somebody will say,

hey, make sure you don't tell anybody how much you're making because whatever, whatever, whatever. It's like, that's not the reason. The only reason is you don't want to have to deal with it. You don't want me to tell somebody, so then it leads to a conversation that you don't want to deal with. So it's actually about you. It's not about you doing me any kind of favor as the person making the money. So I think there is real value to it. But as Kyle said,

you have to be a little careful. Don't make up t-shirts and start handing them out everywhere. Try not to let finding out other people's numbers drive you crazy because you're always going to hear another number that bums you out no matter where you work or what industry that you're in. But no one ever sharing anything or never, you know, having zero information, having zero intel, that's not exactly helpful for you to try to figure out what you're worth as you stay in whatever field you're in. Yeah. I think if you're wondering if you can tell this person, you probably shouldn't, but if you pretty much know, then you can't talk to them about it. I think if you've got to pick your candidates a little bit carefully, it's not just like asking,

what are you doing this weekend? So I think if you're not sure, I wouldn't, I'd try to go to talk to, at least try talking to one person, talk to the one person that you know, you could probably talk to about. Like if you're, if it's a 50, 50, it's a coin flip, I'd say maybe, maybe that's not a great icebreaker. It's also way easier when you're underpaid and for, you know, a good chunk of the ESPN stuff in the beginning, you know, whatever I made is what I made. And I was desperate to work there. And I don't, I don't blame anyone for taking advantage of that situation you know i'm 30 years old starting out i've been in local for three years you know they played it the way they played it and that's the way everybody else would play it and there's a real you know breaking breaking in period in my

industry where it's like hey a lot of stuff is going to suck. Like I made 12, 25, 25, 38. Uh, yeah, those are the first four salaries for it for four annual salaries. I had 26, 27, 28, 29, and then 30, 30 years old. Um, you know, I made a little bit more, but not a ton, but I was driving back and forth to Bristol nonstop for the next three years. So when I have those numbers and I tell somebody else, again, this isn't yesterday, but it's not the 70s, it can help inform other people on how they want to make decisions. What happens is I was okay with it because I felt like for a long time, I know I'm making way less than other people. When you're at the position, and I've never been this position, when you're making way more than everybody else,

then maybe you're probably a little less likely to share. But I don't have that perspective. Okay, that's life advice. Lifeadvicerr at gmail.com. The Ryan Russillo Podcast, Ring or Spotify. Please subscribe.

We'll be back Monday. A lot of good stuff coming up. Please stay locked in. Thanks. Have a good weekend. ... ... ......... Thank you.