The Scathing Atheist - 530: Tongue in Cheek Edition

Episode Date: April 13, 2023

In this week’s episode, Christians get in a fight with yet another board game, Kid Rock demonstrates his nuanced palate by switching from Bud to Coors, and we’ll see if Noah can still do top ten convention memories when the con is in a weed legal state. --- To make a per episode donation at Patreon.com, click here: http://www.patreon.com/ScathingAtheist To buy our book, click there: https://www.amazon.com/Outbreak-Crisis-Religion-Ruined-Pandemic/dp/B08L2HSVS8/ To check out our sister show, The Skepticrat, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/the-skepticrat To check out our sister show’s hot friend, God Awful Movies, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/god-awful-movies To check out our half-sister show, Citation Needed, click here: http://citationpod.com/ To check out our sister show’s sister show, D and D minus, click here: https://danddminus.libsyn.com/ To hear more from our intrepid audio engineer Morgan Clarke, click here: https://www.morganclarkemusic.com/ --- Guest Links: Learn more about Recovering From Religion here: https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/ --- Headlines: (Diatribe) CNN Contributor desperately convinces himself that Christians will continue to matter: https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/08/us/christianity-decline-easter-blake-cec/index.html The Dalai Lama asked a child to suck his tongue: https://www.thedailybeast.com/dalai-lama-apologizes-for-asking-young-boy-to-suck-my-tongue MTG flees Trump protest after getting swarmed and then she compared Trump to Jesus: https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2023/04/marjorie-taylor-greene-flees-trump-protest-after-getting-swarmed-then-she-compared-trump-to-jesus/ Florida Surgeon General underfire for misleading, doctored vaccine study: https://apnews.com/article/florida-ladapo-covid19-vaccines-c498ffcb2393a1fffd692e1687e62e4e Congregants Left in Shock as Pastor Fails to Resurrect After a Year in Morgue: https://bestlifeonline.com/news-congregants-left/ Christians freak out over Holy Spirit Ouija Board: https://www.wfla.com/news/national/christian-themed-board-game-a-trap-from-the-devil-exorcist-says/ “Staggering” Baltimore sex abuse report may be incomplete: https://apnews.com/article/baltimore-archdiocese-sex-abuse-report-7d5d3af098da59a1c9313a246566638c and https://www.insurancejournal.com/news/east/2023/04/10/715971.htm Christian Right is in a panic about trans Bud Light: https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2023/04/marjorie-taylor-greene-mocked-for-switching-to-coors-because-bud-light-is-too-trans/ https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2023/04/bud-light-trans-ad-travis-tritt-kid-rock-history.html

Warning, this podcast is not safe for work, but other than that, it has very little in common with capitalism. This week's episode of The Scathing Atheist is brought to you by HelloFresh, and by the new non-functioning flashlight for people who would rather be in the dark, the Magalight. The Magalight, because light beams refract into rainbows, and that's gay. And now, The Scathing Atheist. Hi, my name is Maya. And as someone who needs to juggle being a peace-loving leftist, an atheist, and a woman while living in Israel, I can assure you, we are in fact very much in the process of evolving from filthy monkey people.

And to quote a fellow fun-sized furious feminist, let's hand it over to Noah, Heath, and Eli. It's Thursday. It's April 13th. And it's Scrabble Day. I'm Mujic to my ears. No illusions. I'm Eli Bosnick. I'm Heath Enright. And from Tony Morrison's New Jersey, Ann Arbor, Michigan, and Waycross, Georgia,

this is The Scathing Atheist. On this week's episode, Christian's getting a fight with yet another board game. Kid Rock demonstrates his nuanced palate by switching from bud to Coors. And we'll see if I can still do a top ten convention memories when the con is in a weed-legal state. But first, the diatron. I got two wonderful gifts for Easter this year. One was a magnetic Jesus dress-up kit with a bunch of sexy lingerie outfits that a listener gave me at the American Atheist Convention last weekend. Very cool. We'll post pictures of it on Facebook. It's pretty amazing. But as amazing as it was,

the other present was even better because it came in the form of this sad, desperate, flailing opinion piece on CNN's website that argued that maybe, just maybe, Christianity will still be relevant in America 30 years from now. And the fucking contortions that the writer had to make to get there were glorious.

So this one comes to us from John Blake, a journalist who desperately wants America to remain Christians for unstated reasons that get creepier and creepier the deeper into his piece you dig. And of course, this is a tough desire to have, given that pretty much every demographic trend is working against him on it. The percentage of the country identifying as Christian has been in free fall for pretty much every demographic trend is working against him on it. The percentage of the country identifying as Christian has been in free fall for pretty much the entire history of the internet. For the first time in history, more than half of Americans don't belong to a

church and virtually every credible statistician and demographer who's looked into these trends agree that Christianity's cultural influence is shriveling. But John Blake has it on good authority from several professors and assistant professors from such prestigious centers of higher learning as Center College, the University of St. Thomas, Salve Regina University, and North Central College of Illinois, that that might not be the case. And the crux of his argument seems to be that what Christianity loses in native-born atheists, it will more than make up for in Christian immigrants. After all, immigrants to this country overwhelmingly come from South and Central America, which are pretty damn Christian last time he checked. Now, of course, the plummeting number of Christians

started around 1990. In 1990, 90% of Americans identified as Christian. Today, that number is about 63%. So for his argument to be remotely viable, he'd have to show that American immigration was relatively low or even falling over that period, and that it's significantly higher and rising today. Immigration has actually been rising since 1990 and seems to have leveled off more or less in the last few years so like that argument is provably wrong if immigration was going to save you from this problem this problem already wouldn't exist and yet he just spends paragraph after paragraph on this desperate little pipe dream 2 000 words he spends on an argument you can disprove with a quick google so he has to put something in those words of spends on an argument you can disprove with a quick Google.

So he has to put something in those words, of course, and he damn sure can't use data. So instead he goes with anecdotes. After all, none other than Thomas Jefferson once predicted that Christianity would die out in America. And then boom, right after that, second great awakening. Take that, you filthy deist. Except, of course, Jefferson never predicted that Christianity would die out. He just predicted it would be less focused on miracles in Christ's divinity and more focused on the basic idea of salvation and good works, which was correct. And also irrelevant, right? Since it wasn't like Thomas Jefferson was writing some scholarly article based on survey data. He was writing a letter to a buddy along the lines of,

yeah, but I don't think we'll always be this stupid. Blake also points out that while a lot of Americans don't affiliate with religion, the majority of those people still do shit like pray and believe in higher powers and meditate, et cetera. Like, you know, spiritual religious type shit. And now he presents this as though that bodes well for Christianity's long-term viability. But what he's actually admitting is that even people who already buy into a logically impossible God and the demonstrably non-existent power of prayer still don't buy into their level of bullshit. I'm not sure how this helps his argument. Now, you might be inclined to forgive Blake here, because you could argue that the point of the piece isn't to predict the future,

but rather to soften the Christian stance towards immigration. After all, much of his piece is about how the only real way to maintain a Christian majority is to welcome a higher number of immigrants. And the group that most stands in the way of immigration is also the group most worried about Christianity's declining cultural influence. But even if that is his intent, you're just trying to pit one of their prejudices against another one, right? Look, y'all, we can keep out the brown people or the atheists, but not both. Hardly a ringing endorsement of acceptance, but it's actually worse than that. I'm giving him too much credit even in that condemnation because he also cautions Christians against not being

bigoted enough. Seriously, he has a bit where he's given sort of the like, you know, none of this is guaranteed call to action in his article. And he says, quote, what if the U.S. enters another xenophobic period and limits migration from non-white Christians? What if progressive Christians prove unwilling to align with non-white immigrants who tend to be more conservative on issues of sexuality and gender, end quote. So I guess the key is all about hitting the Goldilocks zone of bigotry. You got to have just enough, but not too much. But of course, you don't have to dig into the nuances of the argument to find the bigotry in it because the entire fucking premise is bigoted, right? The entire article presents the idea of losing the Christian majority as a bad thing, which is no different than bemoaning the declining influence of white people or straight

people. It's a clarion call against diversity, which is something that CNN never would have published if the minority he was scaremongering about was something other than non-Christians. In fact, Blake gives away the whole fucking game before the article is over by pointing out that the whole goal here is to maintain Christian control. He points out that even with Christianity's declining number, it still plays an outsized influence in American politics. The examples that he chooses are the election of Donald Trump, the Supreme Court decision to overturn Roe versus Wade, and the passing of anti-LGBTQ hate laws all over the country. passing of anti-LGBTQ hate laws all over the country. Hell, he even cites the fact that Americans are generally too bigoted to vote for atheists as a positive. But make no mistake, American Christianity, despite what John Blake would tell you, is dying. And it's bigotry is the thing that's killing it. I would love to say Americans were just too logical to buy into such

a patently false belief system, but there's way too much evidence to the contrary for me to cling to that. America is rejecting Christianity because they've seen what it does to a society, and they don't want that. And the more time Christians spend convincing themselves that the numbers don't mean what the numbers say, the quicker that demise will come. So thank you, John. Sorry I didn't get you anything. They're talking about you, Jesus. May I interrupt this broadcast and bring you a special news bulletin?

Joining me for headlines tonight are the New York and New Jersey to Mike Connecticut Heath Enright and Eli Bosnick fellas. Are you ready to give the headlines a try? Okay, I'm not saying a fast and convenient way to the other two better options isn't a good description of me.

No, but I still find it hurtful. I still find it hurtful. But we're both from upstate New York, and that's way more hurtful to mention than any of the other stuff. You know, that's fair. All right. Well, quick before somebody points out that I'm in Georgia, we're going to pause for a word from this week's sponsor.

Hello, fresh. I'm coming. I'm in Georgia. We're going to pause for a word from this week's sponsor, HelloFresh. I'm coming. I'm coming. Can I help you? Well, hey there, Noah. It's me, the Easter Bunny. No, I see that. So you're real, huh?

I sure am. And I brought you a basket. It's HelloFresh. Oh, I think I thought you were supposed to bring eggs. In today's economy? No way. But with HelloFresh, you get farm fresh, free portion ingredients, and seasonal recipes delivered right to your doorstep. Skip trips to the grocery store and count on HelloFresh

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And no worries if you're not a pro in the kitchen. HelloFresh's foolproof recipes arrive pre-portioned and easy to prepare in just a few steps. It's true. HelloFresh sent us a box to try, and I love how easy it is to unpack and how fresh the ingredients are. You said it, Heath. Heath, you know the Easter Bunny? Yeah, of course. We went to college together.

Yep. All right, Mr. Easter Bunny, I'm sold. Where do I sign up? Go to HelloFresh.com slash Scathing50 and use code Scathing50 for 50% off, plus your first box ships free. Wow, 50% off, plus your first box ships free. Wow, 50% off? That's right. Go to hellofresh.com slash SCATHING50 and use code SCATHING50 for 50% off, plus your first box ships free. Thanks. So, wait.

So, now, do you report to... Oh, no, no, no, no. I work for Ganesh. Oh, good, good, good to hear. And now, back to the headlines. In our lead story tonight, in tongue-in-cheek news, religion really does manage to ruin an impressive amount of everything. From sex to food to sex with food.

It seems that there's no lived human experience that adding magical pretending can't make significantly worse. And we got great evidence of that hypothesis this week as an 87-year-old man non-consensually kissed a child on the lips and asked him to suck his tongue on national television this week but don't worry it's chill because that 87 year old man is the dolly fucking llama yeah yeah the dolly llama is less an exemplar of what it is to be a good person and more a reminder of how low the bar for a moral religious leader really is at this point okay but guys he asked yeah that's a big step up for religious leader asked and didn't do it why am i defending this this is weird

it came off like i tried to defend the just no it's not what i was doing that note off air i'm glad you did it putting it in a big like spectrum Yes, in an exchange that mainstream news outlets have described as playful, whimsical, and misunderstood. At a meet and greet last week, a little boy asked the Dalai Lama if he could give him a hug. Because for some reason we've attributed wisdom to a cliche spouting temporarily exiled god king. But that's another issue. Anyways, he brings the kid up on stage. He asked the kid for a kiss on the cheek and then a kiss on the lips

and then just fucking says, and suck my tongue. And everyone in the room lost their fucking minds like he was doing a tight five at the chuckle hot. Yeah, look, I know that the inappropriate behavior towards children is the main bad thing here, but the insult that this is to whimsicality and and fucking tight fives at the chuckle hut should also at least be acknowledged okay but i'd definitely go see the dali lama open for chapelle and jordan peterson at a chuckle hut for sure yeah no wait for it now

to be fair the kid doesn't suck the d Lama's tongue because that's an eldritch horror. And then like he didn't just try to molest a child on camera, the Dalai Lama advises the child to, quote, look to those good human beings who create peace and happiness and not to, quote, follow those human beings who always kill other people, quote so yeah anyways the humble monk's pr office has since issued a non-apology almost as bizarre as the action itself saying that the dalai lama quote this is their apology quote often teases people he meets in an innocent and playful way no even in public and before cameras. He regrets the incident, end quote.

Yeah, no, like we're interested in the times that he does it in a guilty and playless way, like the one that we're talking about now. Can you address that one? Like this. Yeah, the sex crime. We're actually interested in the sex crime. Yes. So, yeah, I'm glad that that's all settled with the non-apology over the sam shepherd play

that we're calling teasing now that said everyone that i demanded nibble my elbow at a con this past weekend i now can assure you i too am known for my teasing and those photos on my OnlyFans are also regrettable. But whimsical? No. Whimsical, yeah. No. And in we don't need no stinking Madge's news. Oh, you should just drop the mic and walk out of the studio right now.

Absolutely. Marjorie Taylor Greene or Madge Tadge Gage is a failure of a human being and she had another failure last week. And it all happened thanks to a different failure of a human being, and she had another failure last week. And it all happened thanks to a different failure of a human being, who also had another failure last week. Of course, that second person would be Donald J. Trump, the indicted felon, 34 times. 34.

So, Madge went to New York City to take part in a protest outside the courthouse, where Trump got arraigned. But she barely got out five sentences into her megaphone, city to take part in a protest outside the courthouse where trump got arraigned but she barely got out five sentences into her megaphone she's doing a little speech before she got drowned out by counter protesters and had to run away like josh fucking holly it was so beautiful i was so proud to be a new yorker in this moment right right like the loudest karen in georgia with a megaphone is no match for a couple angry new yorkers they let a little fucking crowd of them that's amazing yeah look it's been a while since

i've felt anything vaguely resembling patriotism but that tiktok where the guy yells get her with the space laser it's the new national anthem i don't know if you know but it's the new national anthem we need to make the t-shirt get her with A Space Laser. Yes. I love that so much. So the protest was organized by the New York Young Republicans Club. And just like it says in the title, that group has ties to white nationalist hate groups.

One in particular in the title. They got about 300 people to show up for their sad little thing. And about 150 counter protesters also showed up, but with way more energy and volume, which was fantastic. And here's what MTG had to say before she got too for flinching and fled like a coward. She said, quote, Democrats are the party of violence. They're the party that enabled inaudible and cheered for violent riots all through 2020 side note it really feels like that inaudible was a slur right context knowing her everything

about it that was a slur we're gonna assume that was a slur she continued republicans are the party of peace we're the party that wants to protect the lives of the unborn she said at a rally about how a crime should go unpunished okay sure exactly hey say what you will but tax fraud about your adultery cover-up is a non-violent crime well you know unless it's used to get donald trump into office in which case it starts to blur the line a bit yeah party of peace party of lincoln good job guys and just in case the slur got drowned out she also added just to be absolutely sure she had some hate speech in there we're the party of male and female two genders only that was one of her like five sentences seriously but by that point the counter-protest caught on that MTG had started a speech and they were fully mobilized.

So pretty much all you can hear is drums and whistles. And also one absolute hero of New York City who managed to get right next to MTG and just started yelling liar over and over and over again so loud while she tried to keep talking. and over and over again so loud while she tried to keep talking but giving a speech is pretty much impossible when carol kane is screaming right next to you so madge had to give up and she tried to wrap it up by thanking the young republicans for organizing the protest but that's when everyone started chanting usa usa which it's beautiful because A, the bigots played off their own hate leader by accident, or B, the good people just stole that for a minute and tricked the idiots into having an involuntary chanting response, which I'm sure is very much involuntary for them. I think it was A, but I want us to do b from now on either way so madge put down the megaphone and she stomped away in a huff and got escorted to her suv to go the fuck home and hopefully never come back to new york so the the idea that we could like wabbit season duck season

republicans out of their speeches with the usa chant might just be the secret that wins the day in act three. I hope so. For like 50-50 chance you just saved America with that observation. Gotta use that. Yeah, no, I'm definitely picturing a dangling over a volcano reversal there. Yeah. So following that epic failure, MTG did an interview with the Right Side Broadcasting Network.

This happened inside her fleeing SUV, I'm pretty sure. She told reporter Guy White, quote, it's not actually Guy White, but she told him, quote. Oh, I was so excited. You didn't know it wasn't Guy White. It was a white guy for sure. She told that reporter guy from fucking RSBN, we were swarmed unbelievably swarmed and then she explained how donald trump is just like nelson mandela and jesus christ because all three of those people got arrested at some point also a bunch of people are wrong about how and when they died. I get it. Look, I get it.

Yeah, the crucifixion is the Mandela effect. Exactly. And in vaccine, this one before news tonight. The problem with science, in the mind of Florida Surgeon General Joseph Lopato, is that it insists on using all the facts, even the ones that don't fit his political narrative. So Lopato fixed that. Because it turns out that when you're in control of the report that gets released, you're allowed to delete whatever the hell you want, apparently. So when a section in the state's analysis of the COVID vaccine's efficacy clearly stated that the conclusion he wanted to reach was incorrect, his office just omitted it.

Yeah, that sounds about right. I'd call it p-hacking, but that's what the urine therapy people are calling their movement about also lauren bobert's crime platform same name i don't want to confuse things oh if only it were as complicated as be hacking right only yeah at least then we'd know they were putting some effort into it so first of all thanks to deborah for sending us the story at scathing news at gmail.com. Helps a ton when you do our jobs for free for us. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Noah,

you're saying that when people send us headlines to scathingnews at gmail.com, they become an equal partner in our business, both legally and financially? I'm just glad it doesn't have possum nipples in it, but no, just to be clear, no. Anyway, so here are the facts.

Yes, there is a slight increase in cardiovascular risk when you take the vaccine. To be clear, there's also an increased cardiovascular risk when you do literally anything. All activities increase your cardiovascular risk. And so does inactivity. We need to abort more fetuses to save hearts. Right. Wait. we need to abort more fetuses to save hearts right wait so in in a vacuum the fact that there's an increase from getting the vaccine is insignificant you have to compare it to something for it to have any real meaning and in this case the thing you'd want to compare it to obviously is getting covid

without having a vaccine unless of course you're a politically motivated hack whose goal is to make the vaccine seem scary, in which case that's the last damn thing you want to compare it to. I read that chemotherapy was helpful, so I drank a bag. I just got super sick to my stomach, though. I don't know. Hang Fauci. Yeah. The problem is these idiots never realize that their dumbass conspiracy

is in comparison to COVID, right? Like if the vaccine killed 2% of the people who took it with a wiffle bat, it would still be less deadly than COVID. Oh, God, that would take a long time with a wiffle bat. I feel like you'd have to strangle him with it. So now, to be clear, Lopato is a Harvard educated physician, but his sole qualification to be Ron DeSantis' Surgeon General was his reputation as an anti-vaxxer. He rose to prominence through a series of Wall Street Journal op-eds that opposed lockdowns and mask mandates, promoted hydroxychloroquine and ivermectin, and otherwise contradicted the science. His first act as Surgeon General was

to repeal a quarantine rule for public school kids that were exposed to COVID, and last year, he recommended that healthy children in Florida not get the vaccine and then justified it by citing a bunch of papers that vehemently disagreed with his conclusion. The CDC and the American Academy of Pediatrics also disagreed and made sure to do so very publicly and loudly. All right, but I did a peer review. I asked my peer, Ron DeSantis. He yelled something about Disney and King George III or something like that,

but then he agreed with me. That was real. Is peer ridicule a thing? Can I just let him roast me? So Lopato's latest foray into anti-scientific bullshit was to claim that men between the ages of 18 and 39 shouldn't take the vaccine because of increased cardiovascular risk. And once again, the CDC and the FDA had to come out and publicly rebuke him on this shit.

But thanks to a freedom of information request from the Tampa Bay Times, we now know that an early draft of his own fucking report pointed out that the cardiovascular risk from getting COVID was way the fuck higher. So, again, they just deleted that part. All right. I think we need a, don't say data bill, Ronnie, you want to just, whenever you get a minute,

data is fucking the thing. He releases his own version of the Tampa Bay times. Surgeon general makes great points. And look, this is a story about the increasingly conservative state where we put all the boomers that is now informing their medical policy with quackery i get how this is not an all the way bad type story but it is terrifying right like i mean it's also worth reminding everybody that ron de

santos wants to impanel a grand jury to investigate the pharmaceutical companies that make the vaccine and the florida supreme court just gave him the go-ah in December. Lopato will no doubt be testifying before that grand jury as an expert witness. And just in case the transition back to humor wasn't already hard enough, I should also point out that when he's not spreading pseudoscience about vaccines, Lopato's other main professional focus is opposition to gender affirming care for trans children. If only there were some kind of thing we could do for people who torture and murder children. I don't know. Oh, well. We'll think of it.

We'll think of it. We'll think of it. And next up in headlines, in resurrectile dysfunction news, members of a church in Johannesburg, South Africa, had a lovely plan for Easter week. They all went to a funeral home together to watch the magical resurrection of

their dead pastor, Siva Moodley. Jesus Christ. The big crowd arrived. Somebody did a magic spell. They waited in, I must assume extremely awkward silence for a while and then waited some more and then waited some more.

And it turned out the guy was still dead. Because, you know, that's how dead works. And then they went home and had ham and scallop potatoes. Didn't work out. Yeah. So I feel like they should have at least hid a few eggs in him for the sake of the kids. Right? Something.

Get to the house. Well, now I feel stupid for making extra. Because it's just for my day. All right. Big thanks to Jacqueline for the story. Scathingnews at gmail.com if you want to help out.

Business. Nope. Partner, Jacqueline. So this all started in 2021 when Pastor Moodley died at age 53 because God loves him. And normally,

that would mean a funeral and a burial and a new pastor. But this isn't just any church. This is miracleacle Center goddamn ministry where miracles fucking happen. According to their website, at the Miracle Center,

miracles really are normal. Cancers healed, blind eyes and deaf ears opened, legs grown, and gold dust are just some of the regular miracles. Well, okay, but blind eyes can open right deaf ears aren't close and since they said grown and not regrown they could just be talking about like a kid's leg getting longer over time i just i feel like maybe they're just

being entirely honest and have a really good lawyer writing their blurbs or something. Solid spin. Maybe they're using chat GPT is risen. Whoa. Please don't interrupt. So apparently they had a shiny dust one time, which means Pastor Moodley is an immortal demigod. Right. So when he died, they made some funeral home,

some really just, I feel so bad for this funeral home. They made this place hold the dead body for 579 days. Oh, gross. Yep. The manager of that funeral home. Ooh, you guys making soup? So the manager of that funeral home said they tried to contact the family 28 times, including letters from attorneys, and they never got a response. So they had to just keep the body there by law,

since the family never signed the form to allow for a burial or cremation. And the reason the family didn't sign that form is because the pastor's wife had a vision from God about how he was going to get resurrected. Wow. had a vision from God about how he was going to get resurrected. Wow. I feel like someday somebody somewhere is really going to regret Eli knowing about this one simple trick. Yeah.

Okay. First of all, don't get ahead of my pranks. Now, second of all, does anyone know if we can register Stephen Anderson's church as a funeral home without him knowing? It's very important. Someone could get back to me. I'm going to look into that. Eli finds out he's got 48 hours to live and he's like, I could wear this G-string that

long. I could just wear nothing but this. So for the last 579 days, members of the church, they've been showing up every so often at this funeral home, doing a little necromancing and then leaving in a snit when it didn't work. And all that was happening in a building full of unrelated, sad people in mourning, trying to make final plans for their dead family members. But the funeral home finally got a court order to bury the corpse last week.

And hopefully that funeral home is also starting a very long zombie-based prank war against this church. We will help however you need it. Ooh, yeah, like a marionette thing. And in risking damnation news, someone made a Christian version of the Ouija board. And you know what that means. What are the guys talking about? It's the newest, greatest christian freak out yes the holy spirit board which sells on amazon for 29.95 is advertised as a way to quote communicate

directly with jesus christ and quote and comes with a cross-shaped planchette and is also very clearly a joke yes which one would know if they watched the video on the listing where a man dressed up as Jesus says, the power of Christ compels you to get yours today and licks the board. But Catholics have never found a joke or a child molester they can't

miss, so they're losing their minds about it. What if we went back in time and it turned out Jesus was just being sarcastic the whole time and like his dumb ass early Christian followers couldn't tell? The whole Trinity thing is just from an elaborate who's on first base

type routine the disciples didn't get? Guys, no, you're doing like I was doing a bit. Ah, you're killing people. Alright, Jack. So this comes to us from EWTN which for those of you unfamiliar like me is the YouTube version of the Catholic Church wearing a local news channel Halloween mask. And they hired some helmet haired anchor to talk about the dangers of said game with none other than scathing favorite official church exorcist Ernesto Maria Caro who explained that quote it is not

a game it is a trap from the devil I'm sorry as Super Mario Brothers the Lost Levels amply demonstrated those are not mutually exclusive okay it's a trap from the devil by fucking Hasbro

I love that that's possible for these people yeah carl went on to say quote you would probably think that it is god that is talking with you no nobody would think that man but it is not and quote if the triangle come on man if the triangle is moving by itself be careful it's not God who is moving. It's the devil. No, it's the other guy. It's the other person with this figure.

Jesus. This is a real the earth's not flat. It's concave feel to it. Yeah. Also weird that God created a planchette he can't lift

according to this religious guy. Now, I know what you're thinking, podcast listener. Eli, I know what you're thinking, podcast listener. Eli, what about the very serious adults with driver's licenses who already bought the Ouija board hoping to talk to Jesus?

Now that they know they've been tricked thanks to official church exorcist Ernesto Maria Caro, what should they do with it? Well, don't you worry because EWTN was also concerned about that scenario. Sure. And they advised that, quote, besides getting rid of the board immediately, Caro encouraged Christians who have bought the game to repent and ask God for liberation by going to confession

and asking the priest to give an extra blessing for protection. And then, you know what? Burn it in a pyre of Jenga blocks just to be safe. I don't know how the magic works. I feel like it's game based. All right. Well,

until I find a chastity belt strong enough to protect me from my local priest, I was thinking we're going to need to put 30 seconds on the clock for other versions of christian board games go oh shit it's been a while let me dust some puns off um forbidden apples to apples oh connect forgiveness uh liars dice they lie oh yeah you don't even have to change that one oh oh speaking of dice nazi htz jumanji seriously that was yours i can't just take too much it is yours just you oh you did that out of uh courtesy to me is that something you normally do i did it for you that was out of

love all right how about uh cardinals against Humanity? Oh, love that one. Make the pandemic worse. Because pandemic is a game. It's a game. It's a word. Ooh, clandy land. Ooh, excellence. Well done, sir.

And in diocesan desist news tonight, the latest in the endless trickle of Catholic scandals big enough to rightfully shut down any organization of any size or age came in the form of a long-awaited report about the Archdiocese of Baltimore's contribution to the ongoing child sex abuse scandal. The report into America's oldest diocese spans 80 years, names more than 150 perpetrators, counts an absolute minimum of 600 victims, and details a truly staggering amount of complicity by literally every level in the diocesan hierarchy.

What's more, there is every reason to believe that this report is incomplete and that the diocese itself still has a fuck ton of evidence it's not sharing with state investigators. Yeah, well, not fun fact, this entire headline is just a form letter and we fill in the city and the numbers they're lying about.

Yeah, it's true. It's our podcast version of a super sad repeat. This is our fries dog. Yeah. So, well, yeah. And because of that, I'm not really going to dive into the details of this report. I didn't read it. It's 456 pages and I've read over a thousand pages of reports like these already.

It's like because there's only so much fucking child sex abuse detail that a person can take. Suffice to say, though, it's filled with shit like a deacon who admitted to molesting over a hundred kids and a priest who avoided facing abuse allegations by faking hepatitis treatment, which is a plot that the archdiocese signed off on and helped him execute. I feel like the report actually summarizes itself pretty well quote the staggering pervasiveness of the abuse itself underscores the culpability of the church's hierarchy the sheer number of abusers and victims and the depravity of the abuser's conduct and the frequency with which known abusers were given the opportunity to continue preying upon children are astonishing end quote okay yeah i feel like they're doing a form letter too it's like the worst book of mad libs ever created it's so upsetting like okay the noun

of abuser's conduct we used to have it in a different city right shit uh turpitude feels like this is exactly the right time for Tirpitude. The silver lining here, though, is that on the same day as this report was released, the state legislature also passed a bill that eliminated the statute of limitations on abuse-related civil lawsuits. And that bill has the governor's support.

That's a genuinely good thing, because the only fucking way the Catholic Church is going to feel this is if you hit them right in the cemetery maintenance fund. But to be clear, this entire year-long investigation led to exactly one criminal charge against a 74-year-old priest. And it focused almost

entirely on shit that happened before 2002. So as much of a step forward as this represents, it's still a long fucking way from justice. And finally tonight in in cis boom ba with the ba news, Kid Rock and the entire Christian right are having a despondent

meltdown over the gender identity of beer. That's right, they're freaking out after their beloved Bud Light did a marketing campaign with trans influencer Dylan Mulvaney. So in order to get back at Bud Light and the Anheuser-Busch company, bigots all over the country created thousands of marketing videos by accident

that mentioned the name Bud Light. But, you know, like weepily, they wept for Bud Light. And now these people are all going to be proudly switching to Coors Light in the saddest boycott ever constructed. Coors, if you're listening, if you guys do a Black Lives Matter thing, I'm pretty sure we can convince them to drink their own piss. While they're drinking Coors. My favorite was that first rash of people who didn't understand how parent companies worked and they had to keep cycling through all the different beers that Anheuser-Busch also owns before they landed on one from a different company.

I'm going to switch to Bush. Like what? It's in the name of the parent company. Corona. Nope. Still. Yeah, so if you don't have Eli to send you a constant barrage of links to Chinese spyware, you might have missed the latest bigot trend on TikTok. You want videos of bulldogs doing a wraparound, you accept little spyware heath.

That's how it works. Wraparound. Classic. Okay, I do want that. So to save you some time, I'll try to give you a composite version of all these videos. You don't have to watch them. Cold open. It's a guy in a trucker hat, usually sporting a penis replacement beard. And he yells at his wife about the phone settings for several minutes. And then they

finally realized the video has been going the whole time. Then he gives a long, proud speech about his very serious alcohol problem without realizing it, while he pours out his Tuesday morning 30-pack of Bud Light cans, throws in a transphobic slur, of course, and then ceremoniously pulls out a comically oversized Coors Light every time from out of the frame, and he drinks it. He tries to do a victory sip, usually, from out of the frame and he drinks it.

He tries to do a victory sip usually without visibly retching at the revolting flavor of the new favorite brand Coors Light. I mean, look, far be it from me to comment on the flavor of beer, but I feel like when your slogan is tastes like dirt, you've hit the bottom of the barrel, right? I always thought silver bullet was an inappropriate slogan for a thing you're supposed to put

in your head but you know thank you same script for just about every single video except for one and that would be the video from Kid Rock who exactly if you weren't a big fan of white guys

doing rap rock metal country in 1999 or I guess a big fan of badly aging relics in fedoras right now well good why would you ever be those things well done well that guy decided that pouring the beer he already purchased into the sink wasn't quite enough punishment for bud light so instead he bought several cases of Bud Light and shot them to death with an assault rifle on video.

Okay. Heath, to be fair, if you looked like a cheap Tiger King Halloween costume, you'd have a lot of pent-up anger too. Maybe.

Maybe. And just for the record, every single major brand of beer has very intentionally done some pro-LGBTQ marketing, including Coors Light. Yeah.

These people are fucking idiots. But there is a fun takeaway here. And Dylan Mulvaney, if you're listening, gonna need your help on this. I want to make a series of videos with you doing a promotion for every single water company

and every single grocery store in America. I don't think that counts as murder, but a bunch of the bigots would die. It's very possible that would happen. Maybe even a video with you promoting Kid Rock himself just to see what he does with his gun on TikTok the next day. I don't know. All right.

So that's probably as close to just coming out and saying it as we're legally allowed to get, so we're going to close out the headlines for the night. Kid Rock should himself in the... Thank you for those beeps, Eli. Anyway, that'll do it for the headlines. Heath, Eli, thanks as always.

And when we come back, we'll pine for a better time. Last weekend, to be exact. When you tell normies that you're going to an atheist convention, you'll often hear some variation of, what do you do with those things? Sit around and not believe in God together?

And as tempting as it is to say we spend a weekend without worrying about running into your dumb ass, there are better answers. And it's with hopes of helping you find those that we present our top 10 memories of AACON 2023. Number 10.

The 11th time one of the exhibitors from one of the other tables came up to me and asked why the fuck our table had so much bigger a crowd than theirs. Fuck yeah. Eat shit. Eat shit. Not the point, I don't think. Well, it's kind of the point.

Fuck yeah. Eat shit. Yeah. Yeah. Why am I trying to temper this? No. Right. Dying out loud.

Dying at the convention is more like it. Jesus Christ. Don't love it don't love that improv i just thought retracted internet sorry dave so at these conventions our tables typically attract three types of people the first of course is listeners that want to hang out and get selfies and ask questions and tell us their stories etc the people we're there for. The second is people who really like to talk and realize that we'll happily just chat with them all damn day.

And the third is introverted people who want to be part of a group without any obligation to contribute to the conversation. I think we're also there for them. I appreciate that. Yeah, absolutely. But so once you get a few group C people with some group B

people, you end up with this self-reinforcing feedback loop that keeps drawing in more and more people and nothing draws a crowd quite like a crowd. So that starts to snowball. And before long, there's just this perpetual group of 20 or so people lingering at our table all fucking day. And to be fair, we are a fun group of people. We had a Magic the Gathering tournament, philosophy discussion, Heath did stupid pet tricks. We earned our crown, dammit. We earned it. You did pen tricks. Were you thinking of pen tricks when you said pet? Yeah. Yeah, buddy. It sure was.

And of course... Alright, now Heath's gonna do a triple flip over this big, long group of people. It wasn't like that. Is that what you're saying? Is it wasn't like that? It was a little bit like that, except I did badly with the flip. Yeah, exactly.

And of course, this leads to a certain amount of professional jealousy for all the people who are there to like, you know, do some legitimate work and tell people about their charity or their local atheist group or their political cause or whatever because those people brought candy and swag and high visibility signage and we're over there tossing an eraser around with a crowd of two dozen people whooping and shouting like it's a fucking sporting event. We got 32. 32 in a row. We did. So yeah, so no effort at all at humility here. I'm starting

out with our table having the biggest crowd at number 10. Yeah. Next year you can come hang out with us. It's inspiring. All right, at number nine. Pub trivia night. And I say this despite being fucking furious about missing the win by half a point. And also being furious about the fact that two teams tied for first and didn't do a tiebreaker.

And also furious that we tied for third and didn't do a tiebreaker. What? And also furious that we tied for third and didn't do a tiebreaker. I insisted adamantly to Nick Fish that we needed to do a tiebreaker kumite. And he was like, no, blah, blah, blah. Laws about fighting to the death. We're not doing that. But we should have done that. But despite not quite pulling off the win, and despite me being a crazy person who needs to have the winners,

there need to be winners, and then the other side. It was so much fun despite all that. And we were lucky enough to run into my boy, Freddy G, as it was starting and I roped him into joining our team. Yeah, ooh, indeed.

Each time a hard question popped up and nobody at our table knew it, Fred, he'd wait for a while and like build the moment and the tension and then finally give us the answer that he knew the whole time. So for the rest of the weekend, I kept trying to snag Fred as a ringer for other games too. And it worked at one point. He was crucial to some

codenames victories. So great to see Fred. Absolutely. Number eight. The fabulous city of Phoenix, Arizona. Now, look, I'll say it. We travel a lot here on this podcast. Lots of places we travel, especially in the South. I'll say it. Shitholes. But Phoenix, Arizona, I'm not going to lie. I have a little city crush on you.

And I'm no city slut like Heath Enright over here who can't cross the state line without looking up real estate prices. No. I'm a Hobbit from hobbiton in my heart but i'd be lying if i didn't say that phoenix's picture perfect weather outrageously authentic mexican food and plentiful vegan options didn't embed themselves in my heart and in the case of the mexican food my colon so yeah i feel feel like in July you'd feel differently. But Phoenix also has legal recreational weed, which leads to my next entry at number seven. The guys outside in the smoking section who got all big mad when I started making fun of Trump. So I'm standing outside smoking a joint with somebody. I smoked a lot of joints with a lot of different people.

Few things are harder to consistently remember than details of weed smoking. But anyway, I'm out in the front. I'm smoking with somebody in Josiah, who is the guy who does all the photography at these things. He snaps a pic. So I made a joke. I was like, hey, you got to warn me next time

so I can suck in my gut or something like that. Anyway, there's these two other guys that are out there smoking a cigarette. They laugh a little. And that's all it takes for me to offer you a hit off of my joint. So I rope them in, you know, and I'm what you do what you do you guys want to hit oh yeah yeah yeah so now we're all smoking together so anyway i'm still joking with josiah and i say something along the lines of hey well you know what next time i see you i'm just gonna pull a

full trump pose on you and i do that ridiculous thing that trump always does to hide his gut where he leans way fucking forward so much so that cecil starts describing his angle for a citation needed episode or something. You doing the Michael Jackson thing? What's going to have strings? And then I watch as the two guys I just invited to smoke with me realize that they are not

among friends. Apparently they're like Trumpies and they're both like they think about saying something and then they notice that I've got the same lanyard on as everyone in the area except for them. And then they realize that if they try to defend Schmucka L'Orange, it's going to be a 30 to 2 type situation.

And watching them swallow their pride, remain mute, and slink back into the hotel was so fucking delicious, it got a Michelin star. Okay, sometimes people in those situations stop being 9-11 truthers no a lot of a lot of good people go through this process the best people i hear actually the best well hey if

they walked in there and stopped voting for trump that was it this is he goes up on the list from number seven win-win but but look as idiosyncratic as that moment was i bring it up here because i feel like in a lot of ways that's the the point of these things, right? Like normally as atheists, we have to self-censor. Normally you can't just shout a joke across the sidewalk that relies on the recipient being a free thinker. And when you do it in front of a couple of unsuspecting Trump supporters, it tends to get ugly, but there is power in numbers. And it's nice to flex that a little, even if it's by accident. Yeah. Terrifying that you can't just be like, hey, fascism's bad, right? High five. No. You have to be

in a very specific place. Especially in Phoenix, Arizona. Yeah. Need to have conventions about it at this point. Alright, at number six. The Cornish pasty. Or pasty. I think Americans are saying pasty.

The British are saying pasty. The British are saying pasty. I'm going with pasty because it's a British thing. So it's late on Thursday night. And we got to that moment when everyone clearly wants another meal because they've been drinking. But if you're not in a place like New York City, pretty much everything closes at 7 p.m. Like we're super old or a baby. And you end up being like, yeah, fine. We'll win a fight in the Waffle House parking lot and have some fun.

But this time we found the perfect answer just a couple blocks from the hotel. The Cornish Pasty Company. So it's a great spot for adult Hot Pockets, also known as Hot Pockets. It's open late, but also a great bar overall. They had pool tables that were actually pretty good ones. They had two dart boards with like space to play darts. It was great. And the rest of the weekend, the lobby of that hotel was full of Cornish pasties at every moment.

The word was getting around. It was just people taking turns. Yeah. No, we just kept recommending it. People kept coming back and saying, you were right, by the way. Oh, I had the Cubano. It was so good. Like a Cuban sandwich built into a pasty.

Fucking amazing. And by the way, I also learned that if you say, man, I really like Cornish pasties on the Internet. Everybody with a grandmother from Cornwall will show up to gatekeep your palate and assure you that you did not have a Cornish fucking pasty. God damn it. Because what you had tasted good and real Cornish pasties have yellow turnips in them or some god damn thing or whatever. I got so much of that shit. Oh, I found out a fun fact about the Cornish

pasty. Its original use was for like coal miners to eat a thing. And so the outside, the crust was like very intentionally just like really bad and burnt. So your hands would just, it would be fine that your hands were all over it, dirty like coal miner hands. You didn't have to So your hands would just, it would be fine that your hands were all over it. Dirty, like coal miner hands. You didn't have to wash your hands.

And then you just ate the middle out. That was like the origin of it. I love, I love the notion of someone making a delicacy and being like, and the outside could taste like shit. It doesn't matter. Yeah.

Craig. I learned that Cornish Pastey is a legally protected tournament so that that company actually has to have their shit made in Cornwall and shipped over. Ooh. Sparkling consequences. Number five.

The man, the myth, the legend, Seth Andrews. Now, look, Seth's talks are always great, and they're also always for everybody right if it's your first con or your 50th Seth has new and thoughtful insights on whatever it is he's talking about this year his talk was on Christian sex and it was funny and terrible and and even like a little bit moving yeah no it's a great talk I caught it at free flow and if you need visual evidence of the fact we got it in the form of the exhibition hall that was like opening scene of 28 days later levels of empty during

his talk right like again we had a crowd at our table throughout the entire convention except during Seth's talk at which point we were like you know there were like us and two other people milling around this entire giant fucking room I'm just throwing a pen by myself it was weird probably to look,

but I enjoyed it. Number four. Watching April Poff down Starbucks cold brews like a frat boy slam in a cheap beer. Thank you, Noah. This needs to be studied by science.

Yes, it really does. Okay, so you know those Starbucks iced Frappuccino drinks that come in little 14-ounce glass bottles? So our favorite listener, April Poff, is hanging out with us at the table on Saturday morning, and I see her open one of these things, and then I glance at my phone for like an eye blink.

I look back up, and the fucking thing is gone. The bottle is empty. She swapped it out, and I'm like, April, did you just poke a hole in the bottom of that thing with a nail and shotgun it? And she's like, April, did you just poke a hole in the bottom of that thing with a nail and shotgun it? And she's like, no, it's just how I drink them. And then later on, she asked Eli to grab her one when he's heading to the store. And she does whatever the fucking Frappuccino equivalent of a keg stand is on that one, too.

And Eli rightly freaks the fuck out. Yeah, it was like the birthing scene from Mother Noah. I don't know how everyone didn't freak out at this is insane so yeah so so he who works the night shift at these events and therefore doesn't show up to the table until a bit later in the day he hears about this afterwards and he's like well how fast could she really inhale an iced coffee so eli runs and grabs her another one and she tackles that motherfucker like a viking going at a horn full of meat or whatever okay next year we're trying out a frappuccino helmet like the ones that so maybe you're picturing the two beers with the straws i'm talking about like the helmet

that's like a scuba seal and then you just pour a helmet oh yeah and you just drain it. Oh, okay. All right. I think it's how April would want to go. Yes. So with apologies that poor April is now going to be inundated at live shows by people who want to watch her chug a Frappuccino, I had to slot that in at number four. Yeah. One day into the conference, April's just wasted on Frappuccinos, just stumbling around. At number three. Of course, Codenames

and Wavelength. And in particular, my absolute favorite part of those games is the teammates screaming at each other when the game's over. You do the post-mortem. So, in both games, you have one person on the team trying to clue the rest of the team about their

thought process. In Wavelength, it's about where on a spectrum something fits. And the moment the game is done, it's like, alright, so, nice work. Blue team takes it. A ballpoint pen is fucking sharp! I will murder you! You're a Hitler! You are Adolf Hitler!

Okay, how about this? How about you come over here and I'll stab you in the neck with this pen, and we'll vote again about how pointy it was just now when'll stab you in the neck with this pen and we'll vote again about how pointy it was just now when I stabbed you in the neck with a pen. And that exact argument, literally that one, continued for the entire weekend after happening on Thursday night when we did the very first game, the game night right after the pub trivia. For the next three days, people were like,

yeah, you know, theocracy, Nazis are bad, whatever. When you consider the universe of all possible physical objects in terms of pointiness, you obviously have to take into account that this is where we go. It was amazing. To the point where I got an email last night from one of the people involved giving me all the facts on the case like a fucking deposition just so you couldn't misrepresent the debate in the top ten. Clearly Kelly, right? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. He needs to keep the facts straight. It's our heart and soul. position just so you couldn't misrepresent the debate in the top 10 clearly kelly right oh yeah

oh yeah he needs to keep the facts straight it's our heart and soul i think i described it correctly and everybody fucking disagrees with me so i'll just go fuck myself kelly's send us a headline we'll make you a business partner there's so many ways that it's round it's i'm just it's fine number two the recovering from religion cheese extravaganza. Fuck yeah. So if you've never been to AA Con, by the way, come to AA Con. Or you're just not a titan of industry like Heath Noah and myself. You might not know this, but Gail Jordan and Daryl Ray throw a little cheese and crackers party

for volunteers and folks associated with the Recovering from Religion Foundation every year at AA Con, where they don't ask us for money. Right. Which is weird because it's very definitely the place where they should ask everybody for money because they tell you all the amazing services they offer, the resources they provide, the hours of work they've put in to help people exit religion safely. And then they just don't ask you for money. It's weird.

They just tell you how hard they're working. But if you, if you podcast listener want to find out more or give them the money they so richly deserve and refuse to ask for, you can find out more at recoveringfromreligion.org or at the very least, remember to hand out their number for those who need it. It's 84-I-DOUBT-IT yeah great great fucking work that they're doing if you're not familiar with incredible check it out we'll have a link check it out show notes as well so important for the world like really important and of course i'm gonna go with the same number one we always go with number one meeting all of you Look, the fact that we're even able to do

this job is still surreal to me 10 years in. And there's just something about meeting the people on the other side of the headphones that makes it real in a way that nothing else does. It's the most potent possible reminder that our work here really does have value. It's a chance to talk with you instead of talking to you. And seriously, if we were just doing a genuine top 10 moments here, it would be 10 different conversations I had with our listeners. So thanks to everybody for coming out. And if you missed it, hopefully we'll catch you next year in Philadelphia. Oh yeah, baby. City of brotherly love. Brotherly love.

Before we pull out this episode's straps and say that ain't going anywhere, I want to thank everybody who came out to see us at AACON in Phoenix last week. I know a lot of you are pretty introverted, so it could take a lot of courage to come up and say hi. I'm glad to know we were worth pushing through that anxiety for. And for those of you who didn't quite push all the way through, thanks for trying. Better luck next year. Anyway, that's all the blast we've got for you

tonight. We'll be back in 10,022 minutes with more. If you can't wait that long, be on the lookout for a brand new episode of our Sister Show's Hot Friend Godawful Movies debuting at 7 a.m. Eastern on Tuesday and an even newer episode of our Half-Sister Show Citation Debuting at noon Eastern on Wednesday. Obviously, this show wouldn't fit the customer specifications of a neglected to thank Heath Enright for the way he rocks, Eli Bosnick for the way he rolls, Lucinda Lusions for the way she rocks and rolls. And Maya for providing this week's Farnsworth quote. Incidentally, if you need some more talk about board games, video games, and role-playing games in your life, but like in Hebrew, check out Maya on the Hebrew version of the Games Burning podcast.

She assures me that that's what it's about, but it's in Hebrew. So I guess I kind of just have to take her word for it. She seems trustworthy. Anyway, most of all, of course, I want to thank this week's most honorable hominids, RJ Cats Are Not Trash, Siv, Michael, John, Ted, Dave, and Thais, Les, Christian, Casey, Terlin, Harry, Elon, Jonathan, Key, The Medium, Atheist, Elle, and Roger.

RJ Cats, Siv, Michael, John, and Ted, who are so fair, Mirror Mirror on the Wall issued a retraction. Dave and Thais, Les, Casey, Terlin, and Harry, who are so badass, the ninjas circle around him and move in slowly before the fight starts. And Elon, Jonathan, Key, Medium, Elle, and Roger, and Harry, who are so badass the ninjas, like, you know, circle around them and move in slowly before the fight starts, and Elon, Jonathan, Key, Medium, L, and Roger, whose IQs are larger than

Elon Musk's Twitter losses. Together, these 18 amiable atheists aided in our aims to alienate the Abrahamic face this week by giving us money. Not everybody has the money it takes to give us some, but if you think you're up to the challenge, you can make a per-episode donation at patreon.com slash scathingatheist, whereby you earn early access to an extended ad-free version of every episode, or you can make a one-time donation patreon.com slash scathing atheist whereby you own early access to an extended ad free version of every

episode or you can make a one-time donation by clicking on the donate button on the right side of the home page at scathingatheist.com and if you'd like to help but you're too busy fighting off the gandalf good attack squadrons no worries that's thirsty work we can wait but once you get done be sure to leave us a five-star review tell a friend about the show and follow us on social media and speaking of following us on social media tim robertson handles that for us and our audio engineer is morgan clark who also wrote all the music that was used in this episode, which was used with permission. If you have

questions, comments, or death threats, you'll find all the contact info on the contact page at ScathingAdias.com. I can tell about halfway through that you were really wishing that the ad was me selling HelloFresh to the Easter Bunny. Yeah, no, it wasn't. The preceding podcast was a production of Puzzle and a Thunderstorm, LLC. Copyright 2023. All rights reserved.