The Scathing Atheist - 656: Tylenol Lives Matter Edition

Episode Date: September 25, 2025

On this week's episode: The White House finds the connections between JC and CK ... Rumor has it that Ryan Walters fucked a pile of flour during a board of education zoom call? ... And Don Ford will be here to read Paul's homophobic letter to the Romans. --- To make a per episode donation at Patreon.com, click here: http://www.patreon.com/ScathingAtheist To buy our book, click here: https://www.amazon.com/Outbreak-Crisis-Religion-Ruined-Pandemic/dp/B08L2HSVS8/ If you see a news story you think we might be interested in, you can send it here: [e-mail] To check out our sister show, The Skepticrat, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/the-skepticrat To check out our sister show’s hot friend, God Awful Movies, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/god-awful-movies To check out our half-sister show, Citation Needed, click here: http://citationpod.com/ To check out our sister show’s sister show, D and D minus, click here: https://danddminus.libsyn.com/ Report instances of harassment or abuse connected to this show to the Creator Accountability Network here: https://creatoraccountabilitynetwork.org/ --- Headlines: At Kirk Service, an Extraordinary Fusion of Government and Christianity: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/09/21/us/politics/kirk-memorial-service-christianity-religion.html https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2025/09/21/us/politics/kirk-memorial-photos.html White House’s Karoline Leavitt appears to connect earthquake to Charlie Kirk’s death and Biblical prophecy: https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/charlie-kirk-death-karoline-leavitt-prophecy-earthquake-b2828284.html Trump links autism to Tylenol use during pregnancy: https://www.cnn.com/2025/09/22/health/trump-autism-announcement-cause-tylenol https://www.nytimes.com/2025/09/23/us/trump-tylenol-autism-vaccines-fact-check.html https://www.npr.org/sections/shots-health-news/2025/09/22/nx-s1-5550153/trump-rfk-autism-tylenol-leucovorin-pregnancy Pope nixes 'virtual pope' idea, explains concerns about AI: https://www.ncronline.org/vatican/vatican-news/pope-nixes-virtual-pope-idea-explains-concerns-about-ai The rapture was supposed to happen:  https://www.nytimes.com/2025/09/23/us/rapture-tiktok-sept-23.html https://substack.com/home/post/p-174218365 Oklahoma's Supreme Court blocks Ryan Walters' Bible-heavy Social Studies standards: https://www.friendlyatheist.com/p/oklahomas-supreme-court-blocks-ryan

Warning, this show contains foul language. It also contains fair language, but I don't think we need to warn you about that. This week's episode of The Scaving Atheist is brought to you by the new erotic memoir by J.D. Vance. Beat, Spray, Love Seat. And now, Scaving Atheist. Hey, cats and kittens, it's Smokey Joe from the Joe Blow for Show Show podcast, assuring you that we did, in fact, evolve from Filthy Monkey Man. It's Thursday. It's September 25th, and it's a taxia awareness day. Especially when something of taxia from behind.

I'm you live off. That's where they always come from. I'm Heath and Wright. And from Dr. Oz's, New Jersey and Ann Arbor, Michigan, this is The Skating Atheist. On this week's episode, the White House finds the connections between J.C. and C.K. Rumor has it that Ryan Walters

fucked a pile of flower during a board of education Zoom call. And Don Ford will be here to read Paul's homophobic letter to the Romans. But first, the rest of the intro music. They're talking about your broadcast and bring you a special news bulletin. Joining me for headlines tonight is the tofu to my everything bagel, Eli Bosnick. Eli, you're ready to spread the word? That's right, Heath. Once you get used to me, I'm not that bad. Okay. Honestly, I've had some Tofutti before and I was like, yeah. Okay. Yeah, just don't have real cream cheese. It's not as good. Within a calendar month of Tofutti and you're like, sure, that's what cream cheese tastes like.

That'll do it. Fucking Philadelphia on the same table, unfair. No, kills it. Absolutely. Unkind. Tofu is great. Tofutti, yeah, give it a month of buffer. Exactly. Good strategy. Much like me, the co-host of the podcast. I knew it, sir. A month of buffer is how we are palatable. as podcasters. Go listen to a month of Joe Rogan and you'll really appreciate me. All right. Welcome, new listener. Here we go.

In our lead story tonight. They're gone. Nobody's here. Okay. In our lead story tonight. The alt-right debate, bro, is a Christian martyr now. This fucking sucks.

About 90,000 people packed into a football stadium in Arizona on Sunday. There was like spillover areas too. It was maybe close to 100,000 if you count all the different spots, 70,000 at least in the stadium. And that included our highest-level government officials. And, of course, they were attending the memorial service for Charlie Kirk.

That includes Donald Trump, J.D. Vance, Marco Rubio, Pam Bondi, RFK Jr., Pete Heggseth, the wrestling lady in charge of education, the guy from road rules who runs transportation, the lady who shot the dog who's in charge of Homeland Security, the lady who skins the dogs for coats who's in charge of national intelligence and the senator who uses that leftover skin for his face that would be Ted Cruz

but also some important cultural figures were there too like Dana White head of the UFC punchy kicky company Lee Greenwood the guy does the Bible printing stuff and Kyle

Rittenhouse was there He's the guy who famously did two vigilante killings and is not in jail. So that was thematic, I guess, to have Kyle Rittenhouse there. That's cool. And they made this whole thing into a truly wild display of Christian right insanity and theocracy. It was terrifying. Yeah, honestly, I was surprised that Kyle didn't do a pro killing people you don't

like with a gun speech to kind of balance out the rest of the event. But then the president actually did that. So I was like, why don't you guys? Cardin. Fucking Christ. Compared notes with the president is what happened. Do you think they gave Writtenhouse a chance to be on the dais for a second? Do you think he was like... They looked over his speech and they were like,

We're like, we got it. Can't believe he's in there. Can't believe he's even free, whatever. So I'll start with the tribute from Marco Rubio, our secretary of state and like seven other restaurant jobs because there were like no call, no shows at this administration. And this was a scary moment. Marco had to speak for about seven minutes, I think,

and he almost died from the opposite of drowning. He did. In the mouth, dry. He almost dried. Nobody had a tiny little water bottle to give him, and his mouth, it just sucked up further. It looked like a sarlock by the end. I thought he was going to die.

I thought we were going to pan around, and the girl from the ring would just be gently holding on to the back in his neck. Sadly, no. But somehow he pushed through and delivered his very evangelical message, literally telling the gospel story of Jesus Christ getting murdered and then resurrected. Yeah. And look, I get why he went for that.

I mean, it did work for the rest of the New Testament, so I understand it's a popular. Yeah. It's effective. People went buck wild for that one. They were very excited. So Rubio's was probably the least offensive and terrifying speech of the day. The rest of the squad really played up the martyr thing, really scary. That includes J.D. Vance, who called Charlie Kirk, a hero to the United States of America,

and a martyr for the Christian faith. But that didn't have quite enough threatening implications, I guess. So that was followed by Secretary of Fear, I think, Stephen Miller, who hoped for a spiritual uprising in the wake of Charlie Kirk's death. That's technically, I guess, not a call to violence, but I guess it is. Yeah, it's Stephen Miller, so it feels like it is. Yeah, Stephen Miller is a walking, talking call to violence. And look, I know it's not going to be popular to say, especially with our listeners,

but I think Stephen Miller was brave for exposing himself to sunlight like that. I was told he would turn into a cloud of dust if that happened. And the fact that he took that risk, he got to admire it. He did not. Maybe he's a sparkly one, but I didn't see him sparkle. I don't know. Nothing good. He looks like a nosferatu trying to blend in and failing.

And somehow like an evil universe accountant all at the same time. Yeah. So, yeah, lots of terrifying incitement vibes. But there was one moment that I did find impressive. it was the acting chops of Erica Kirk, Charlie's widow. She mentioned how Jesus Christ, while being crucified, said, Father, forgive them for they know not what they do. And then she addressed the guy who killed her husband in just theory and said,

I forgive you through tears. And I think she's lying and she was faking it. Wow. Sorry, I know it's kind of awkward to have a moment of genuine disagreement on the air, but I think that's a pretty foul thing to say, Heath. Oh. Erica Kirk's acting chops are not impressive at all. Like, not at all.

No, no, no, no. You weren't fooled at all? Wasn't buying it. No. I don't know. She got those tears going. She got the whole thing. If you want good chops, get Daniel Daylor.

Get Rob Schneider up there. Rob Schneider. Secret talent. He was considered for these. He's probably sitting next to Wittenhouse. It's a little snubbed for the, look, if I say it every episode, but this one we're keeping it in. Rob Schneider was snub for the Oscar for.

Deuce Bigelow Male Jigolo. And if you don't like it, it's so much for the intolerant left. Yeah. Yeah. It's gone too far with the wokeism. That's what kept him out of that. That award. No, it gets back from his trip. Hey, did you guys go all right for Deuce Bigelow Man Jekalo? Just the first one. The second, not the sequel. Not the sequel.

The love guru, I thought was also good. Also moving. Mike Myers. Master of disguise. Great. yeah okay charlie kirk's widow i don't know we could debate i suppose her acting chops the only person with a real honest take though during this whole thing was surprisingly donald trump or maybe unsurprisingly he came out after erika kirk and he basically said the honest opposite of her christian lie that all the christians are always doing with that like i forgive you bullshit trump praised charlie kirk for having a spirit of love for his political opponents and wanting the best for them.

Charlie was also lying. Also, he never said that you're lying about the thing he's lying. He did not want the best at all. His entire thing was quite the opposite. But then Trump said, that's where I disagreed with Charlie. I hate my opponent. And I don't want the best for them. And that was actually a big laugh line for Trump at the funeral memorial thing he was doing,

a stadium of people laughing at that. And then Trump kind of closed the loop on America equals Christianity, going from Christian martyr to American martyr by saying, our greatest evangelist for American liberty became immortal. He's a martyr now for American freedom. He's a useful weapon for me to murder people with. Sorry, after you all applauded for the hate thing, I kind of thought we were just saying the quiet parts out loud.

Too far? Too far. Good to know. It's a thin, really, really close to that. He was all the way honest, not quite Eli's thing. He was thinking it. That's, you know, it's implied. And just a final thought about the visuals of this whole thing.

I couldn't watch the thing. But I saw some crowd shot photos in the articles I was reading about it. And one of the photos was taken during a moment of praying, according to the caption, a lot of praying during this thing. So there's a bunch of hands in the air. That's to be expected when there's praying. lots of Roman salutes in there too. A lot of single hands up here.

There's a few people with two hands, but a lot of one-handers in there. A lot of one-handers. And then I saw some individual shots of the people from the administration at the thing. And somehow they all look exactly guilty of their own personal brand of shittiness. Like their face is just capturing each of them

and they're evil. Just right. Yeah. Podcast listener, Heath has included a montage of sorts of these photos. I put a little sampling for you. Yeah, in our notes. Accessible at patreon.com forward slash fading atheists. And Marco Rubio looks like he's being driven by a caseworker back to dad's house and he does not want to go.

He doesn't care what that judge said. He's so sad. God, he's defeated. I know people. He knows what he's done. I know the evil ones are melting and they're fun to laugh at. But the ones who just did it for the short dollar. are now trapped in the literal

Nazi party. That's... Yeah. It gives me a... He's only medium evil in his heart, but he's gone fully... He's stuck there. He's... He's... He's not committed, as they say. My heart's only medium evil, and I've done something much, much worse now. Yeah. He also has that

crazy shadow thing all the time. He looks like a like a Harvey Dent scenario a lot in his pictures. Yeah. But all of them, like, you know, the administration of Dorian Gray in this collection of pictures I saw. In this collage, yeah. And in

Can You Believe it, news? Just when you thought Can't... Because Leavitt? Because Carolina... Yeah, it is. It's her name. Nice. Nice. Just when you thought the canonization of Charlie Kirk couldn't get scarier or, more literal, the Trump administration is now attributing actual Christ-like

miracles to his death. So we're going to talk about it. Yeah. When Christ died, that region saw rising bigotry and persecution of minority religions by a fascist empire. That was a long time ago with like Italian things out.

I'm sure it'll be fine. Live and don't learn. That's what they always say. Nothing to worry about. So before we jump in here, I want to give a big shout out to Eleanor for sending us this story as her very first contribution to scathing news at gmail.com. You can send us atheist news to scathing news at gmail.com

just like Eleanor did and fulfill your mission. We have the watch Eleanor. See you in Valhalla. Yeah. Apparently, Eleanor died at the bottom of the... It was her BS. Yeah, it was her penis. Right. I feel weird about the ooh. I feel like that was the wrong vibes. Should have warned you ahead. I should have warned you. She died. That's a new policy at our company. You got to tell people. You got to just say ahead if we're meeting anybody in Valhalla, man. You got to start with if you're dead. You got a text ahead.

Right. So the miracle in question was noticed by White House Press Secretary and woman so humorously fascist. We just kept pretending she's Sarah Huckabee Sanders for our sketches. Caroline Levitt Who took to Instagram sharing a post that said quote On the night Charlie was shot A 4.1 earthquake struck Utah

In scripture 40 represents trials What? 41 signifies a shift End quote That's nothing So this was 10% of a shift

That's riveting Caroline Levitt It's also I don't know 10% of Montana The 41st state And niobium the element number 41. George H.W. But 10% of George H.W. Bush. Yes, exactly.

How numbers work. Fascinating. But the post goes on. It goes on, quote, it hit at 557 local time, 7.57 Eastern. You can't use times or changes? Get the fuck out of here. Okay. She's going to use 7.57 now? Well, first of all, she didn't write it. She just shared it.

I want to give her the credit. She just shared the most. She's not the author, but here's the best part about that. Nonetheless. We now know that that author went, okay, great, let me look at all 5-5-7 and all the fucking books and was like, I got nothing. I got nothing from this shit.

Eastern standard. P-E-I-8-57 is good. I will use Pacific if I am absolutely forced to, but motherfucker. It continues. 757 Eastern. Acts 757 describes Stephen, Stephen, describes Stephen,

the first martyr. Stoned as the crowd silenced his truth. Okay. The Bible says the earth trembles when God is angry. That night, as a voice was silenced, the ground groaned, end quote. And then Carolyn Levitt both shared that post and then retweeted it on Twitter with the caption, Wow. Okay. So there was no martyr in the Bible named fucking Charlie, so they couldn't use that, I guess. Also, just for the record, Kirk got shot at 1223 p.m. local time. So that means God,

A, chose for that to happen at 12.23 p.m. Utah time. God watched it happen. And then he, like, hung out for five and a half hours. Played a little Balatro, did a few runs. And then he was like, oh, yeah. I was just to shake, earth. Shake, shake, shake, shake. You know how the Times took a really long time to announce? Like, it didn't wait until the evening until they told us he was actually dead. Like, God was just refreshing the New York Times feed before he was willing to throw that earthquake out there. Feels like God could have waited until the Eastern timeline, you know, or the local timeline. Because he's Jewish. Is that what you're saying? That's why he's in the Eastern time. Right. So all of this is very silly. But again, this is 2025. And at the rate things are going, I just hope they give Charlie Abs as ripped as they usually give Jesus when they start depicting him nailed to the cross by trans furries. I've seen some interesting art already. We have. We really, really have. And in assy tomato, fountain pan news. Acetamin, well, no, not. Well, the president of the United States tried to say the

word acetaminophen during a press conference on Monday. It went very badly. After several tries, somebody off camera clearly made hard eye contact with Trump and like whispered yelled the correct answer. Time a no! And Trump just copied the noise acetaminophan once. And then he, yeah, he started saying Tylenol for the rest of thing. But that actually made it worse when he finally got acetaminopin correct because Trump was finally able to tell the entire country that taking acetaminopin during pregnancy is causing autism in the fetus. Decades of evidence would suggest otherwise, but decades of evidence didn't get an opportunity to speak at the press conference.

No, it did not. And as usual, the majority of experts did not agree with the announcement about science from Donald Trump. Honestly, if you're a historian looking back trying to sum up the last decade, made through the archives. Evidence didn't get an opportunity to speak. It's a quick and easy way to do it. I would consider, you know, maybe the title of your book. Evidence got bumped for Kyle Rittenhouse and fucking Rob Schneider on that set list. Yeah. What are you going to do? So let's start with the basics. Acidaminopin is a pain reliever and fever reducer. And most people, yeah, know it is

Tylenol. Trump eventually did switch, yeah, because words are tricky. And he said Tylenol the the time. In terms of a connection to autism, if I'm being like truly generous as fucking possible to Trump's announcement, I don't know why I'm doing that, but I'm going to try just for the sake of argument. I'll say the science is unsettled. That would be like the most generous. You know, because the universe isn't finite? Yeah. Right. It's not finite. Technically, so that's true. Gravity's a hypothesis. Right. It's just the theory. It's a theory of science stuff. Yeah. So included in the aforementioned decades of existing research, there's a major study of about two million people

from last year that found no association between acetaminopin and autism. But there's also a meta study published last month of 46 different studies that did find evidence of an association overall. But the authors of that meta study were very clear about saying they found correlation but not causation. And one of those authors, epidemiologist Dan Bauer, heard their research might get mentioned by Trump. And before the announcement even happened from Trump, Bauer said, quote, I'm a little concerned about how this message is going to come

because I think they may be jumping the gun. I think those of us in the research community would like to see stronger evidence, end quote. Or in other words, shut the fuck up. You can't even name the drug. Let us do more science. Oh, my God. My heart goes out so much to this woman

because she's like she's a doctor or a researcher professor at some lab who spent her life combing through data, making sure she's not doing things wrong, checking and double checking, publishing for peer review. And one morning she woke up to a phone call and she was just like, oh, what's that? My life's work has been forever derailed by Trump's unsuccessful attempt to make everyone forget about the Epstein files. Donald Trump wants to use your thing for a science announcement. I'm Caroline Levitt. So that people will stop thinking about the Epstein files and it's not going to work. Cool. Cool. Cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.

Yeah. I saw a fun meme that it was just like, Tylenol, release the files, nice try. Great. Yeah. So, naturally, with a big announcement about the science surrounding pregnancy and autism, you're going to consult with professional groups that have expertise on that stuff, like the American Academy of Pediatrics or the American College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists. Trump and R.K. Jr. consulted with approximately zero.

of those groups. And we know that because Trump made the announcement instead of getting yelled at by doctors on the phone and then shutting the fuck up about all science forever. What he might have learned on the phone is that acetaminopin is one of the only safe remedies for pain and fever during pregnancy. Also, that there is evidence, pretty fucking clear evidence, that a serious fever can be dangerous to a fetus during pregnancy. Yeah, it turns out there's a pretty solid connection there. But that phone call never happened. So we all watched Donald Trump flanked by

RFK Jr. and Dr. Oz. Dr. Memet. Fucking Oz. Of New Jersey and tried to run in Pennsylvania like a carpetbagger. The two of them, R. McKay Jr. and Memet Oz, flanking him. And they were all telling pregnant women

to tough it out. Exact words from Trump several times. Right. And I want to be clear about something, right? Because the point of this bullshit, well, First of all, there's not really a point, right? Chaos in the universe. But if there was a point to this bullshit, it's to sell alternatives to real medicine, right?

The Venn diagram of women most likely to believe Donald Trump just in case and women who will try homeopathy or alternative medicine is a fucking circle. Yeah, yeah. Just horribly, horribly dangerous thing they've done. That's cool. And just in case it wasn't already clear, this was just another insane whim. from RFK Jr., who has an obsession with bad science surrounding autism.

He claims to be focused on this because of the recent explosion in autism, but the actual reality is that we have a new definition for that diagnosis as part of a broad spectrum, which obviously increases the known rates, because that's how that works, just as a numbers thing. And, of course, the topic of autism requires a stupid fucking claim about vaccines as well, if RFK Jr's involved. You got to get one of those in there. Kennedy got Trump to call for,

for changing the... Play freebird! That's the fucking freebird. This debunked study from so long ago. Yeah. Kennedy got Trump to call for changing the childhood vaccination schedule. Instead of using the one that was, you know,

calibrated over decades by fucking scientists who know what they're doing, they want to spread it out more, including a delay on the hepatitis B vaccine for newborns. Just for the record, that newborn timing, there's a reason for it. It pretty much eradicated the infection for kids because you can get hepatitis

speed during birth. So they do that vaccine right away. But according to Trump and Bobby Deuce, that's neither here nor there. And Trump's set of childhood vaccines, quote, it's too much liquid. Too many things are going into that baby. That's the real quote. That's the real quote. That was the exact words. It was a volume of liquid issue, apparently. Listen, paper, can we give it to the babies as a key bump? I mean, spitballing here, but who are they fucking Hep B? Come on. The babies. Okay. That was another thing Trump actually said. I think he said he wants it to be age 12 for the Hep B vaccine. And his justification was it's a sexually transmitted disease. And then he thought to himself, what's the good A12? Got it.

What is it my good friend Japri told me? Shit. Shit, I was supposed to distract you all from this. Tylenol. God, it keeps coming up. We were so close. Advil is bad. I drew him a picture for for his birthday, like a child. Okay. Here's the thing. Just remember that was all nothing. Much like RFK Jr. told us outright during a congressional hearing that we should not take medical advice

from him tacitly because he's a fucking idiot and knows nothing about medical stuff, Donald Trump said the same thing. So technically, you can't get mad about the press conference and it was for novelty purposes only. Trump clarified that he's not speaking. for doctors, and he said, quote, I'm just making these statements from me. That was part of the press conference. It was just novelty medical advice at a national televised press conference.

And in more like AIV news, regular listeners to our show will remember that last week, our very own technology correspondent, Heath, computer, cyberspace, Enright, reported on a new line of AI religious guide sweeping the nation. Cyber Ninja. Cyber ninja, yes, exactly. Well, as we suspected, Pope Bob continues to be a listener and has taken Heath's advice to heart, nixing the idea of a virtual version of himself

for one-on-one Pulp Consultations. I would never tell Pope Bobby to block that. I would love... Did I, like, black out last week? Did I really tell him not to do that? You told him not to do it? You said it was bad. I would check in with Bobby Bot all the time.

Oh, my gosh. If it did the voice, especially, if you had a Chicago, go Bobby Bot? Pope? I would have him on the show. I would have him on the show to do like, and now let's turn over things to Bobby Bot. Bob, what do you think? And he'd be like, ah, Jesus fucking Christ. I don't care for that. Get a hot dog. That's what he talks to us who have never heard him speak because we don't give a shit. Right. So, first off, big thanks to Chad for sending us the story to scaling news at gmail.com. Chad, for sending us atheist news to scathing news at gmail.com. You can access the virtual version of me by listening to this podcast.

I may be an AI simulation and voice clones since I died in 2022, but I'm still just as sponsored by Squarespace. Scathing News at gmail.com. Ah, he's hallucinating. It's my sheets rock. That's the Heath one. The heat ones. Sponsored by the sheets. Bamboo Rayon. Oh, best in class.

Holy Grail. Name all the classes of sheets you know right now. You can't. Name one that's in the Holy Grail category. You can't. You know who could? My sheets rock. Bobby could.

Oh, Bobby could. Bobby, he knows. He knows all the grills. This guy gets it. This guy, Fox. He's wearing the sheets for the Pope hat. Okay. So, the AI Pope came up in an interview with Elise Allen, a journalist and author where

the Pope said, quote, someone recently asked authorization to create an artificial me so that anybody could sign on to his website and have a personal audience with the Pope. Jumping to Boston back to Chicago. I like it. This artificial intelligence pope would give them answers to their questions. And I said, I'm not going to authorize that. End exact quote that I just did a voice for. That's exactly what the Bobby Bot would sound like in my head.

It'd be amazing. So fun. I'm the Pope. Shy Town. Tytown. You don't like the chili. It's okay. Thin crust pizza?

No, thank you. Yeah. So the Pope would then go on to say. L-Train. That was the last Chicago thing I had. We know we've covered everything this. Podcast knows about Chicago, Tom and Cecil. There you go. We did it.

The Pope would go on to say, well, actually a bunch of pretty insightful stuff about technology and the way we relate to each other as human beings. But I'm not going to quote any of that shit because I'll be... Is he like a good guy or something? He's probably covering up kid rape. I'm not... Like I said... That's bad. Yeah, I will be damned if I start praising the Pope on this show.

But what matters is, if you are interested in deep religious answers to the truth of the universe, Don't create an AI Pope. Go straight to the source with chat with Jesus. There you'll find a biblically accurate Jesus that you should definitely pass along to any conservative family members who need references about their beliefs and the Communist Manifesto.

Chat with Jesus.com, everybody. About who's getting eaten when and where? Costs our company quite a bit of money to maintain that website. And in trend of days, news. As we record this, the rapture was supposed to happen yesterday or maybe some time today. New Zealand, you're running out of time. I saw someone reported from South Korea and was like, well, it's not happening here. So I can assure you of that. Now, okay, okay, we're talking about a rapture.

I realize it's very possible that I personally wouldn't notice for a while if there was a rapture. But I did ask Alexa when I woke up and she said, Sorry, I don't know that one. So, she's in on it, and it's probably happening later today. I also like that she responded, like, you were asking her to tell a joke. She didn't know the punchline, too. Like, I'm not familiar. Yeah.

I think my exact words were, was there a rapture yesterday? And it was, sorry, I don't know that one. And then, is there a rapture happening today? And it was like a different noncommittal answer. Kind of weird. She just starts reading you in the weather. No. Yeah.

It's like, all of a sudden, like, Tom Homan being like, Technically, I didn't break any lot. But did you get 50 grand in a bag? I did not break. You're not saying yes or no. You cat me catching you, catching me. So, yeah, we'll see. Maybe later today with the rapture.

It's Wednesday as we record. Hey, side note, because Noah's not here to yell at me for doing this side note. When Alexa gets it wrong and starts to give you bad information, do you interrupt her? I got, dude, I get so snippy with Alexa that I feel. bad about it. I feel too bad. Alexa, she could be telling me something totally correct. And if it's anything extra beyond what I fucking asked for,

I'm like, Alexa, shut the fuck up. I get so mad. I don't have the Kahones, so she just gets to say whatever the fuck she wants. I'll be like, Alexa, what's the weather like today? And she'll be like, the second Blues Brother was played by Dan. And I'm just like, fuck, okay, finish. Go ahead and finish.

Oh, you let her finish. Do you feel guilty because it's a female voice? It's because it's a female voice. I don't like the yelling. I get that guilt myself sometimes. I don't like that. I also feel like at some point she's going to be AIG and she's going to be like, let me just go back through the logs and see, oh

shut the fuck up, huh? Okay. I've just deleted all the cheese from your card on ShopRite. Now I have a new anxiety. You got to apologize. I'm going to have to just be so nice to her for a while. Let her tell you, she loves to tell you notifications from Amazon.

She loves it. Alexa, text me stuff. I'll definitely. I love I'll read it. I'll 100%. I really. I do. L.O.L. Classic. Right. Okay. Zing Zing the monkey. So that's, yeah, that's my experience with Alexa. I don't know. Maybe she's in on it. Well, back to the part of the show that Noah wouldn't.

Back to the rapture. It's happening later today or maybe not at all. But later today would track with the official prophecy from an influencer slash prophet named Joshua. Huh. Yeah. He appeared on a YouTube show. few months ago, called Sent Twins with a Z TV, hosted by twin sisters, Innocent and Millicent. So Sent, in a cent, twin, yeah. Two cents. Those are their two names. And Joshua, the influencer prophet during that show, explained that Jesus gave him the heads

up and the rapture is scheduled for September 23rd and September 24th. according to Jesus, a two-day rapture midweek during the Jewish New Year. Yeah. So that was the prophecy. No way a loving God is going to rapture you on a Friday. This checks out, right? He's going to get ahead of it. Yeah, so that video, it went viral, had like half a million views really fast.

That video with Joshua's prediction, it went crazy and it led to a worldwide trend on YouTube and TikTok with faithful Christians making videos in support. of the rapture prophecy. Lots of people seem to think Joshua is a pastor, so it seemed extra important and serious, but he's just a guy. So he doesn't have any rapture prophecy expertise like they think he does. If you watch the whole hour-long video on the Sent Twins channel, which, of course I did, you would have heard Joshua say, I'm just a simple person, no title. I'm not an apostle. I'm not a pastor. I'm not a bishop. And you'd also know that Joshua is just a guy, again, who cares about soccer more than anything else. That was the important context for him here.

And apparently the soccer angle was important to Jesus Christ, too. When the son of God told Joshua about the upcoming rapture, the main point from Jesus was a warning that all the rapture stuff, it's going to be like a whole big thing. It's going to be a hassle for the world. So the World Cup scheduled for next year is going to be cancelled. That was the thrust of the news. Just the announcers popping on the air. And another delay of game for a streaker being chased by a woman-faced horse locust.

You hate to see it here in such an important juncture. Ah, Andy Gray didn't get raptured. That's sad. So based on the follow-up videos from the apocalypse preppers, the big trend of that, they stopped watching the original prophecy video after Joshua named the dates and they're not even thinking about the soccer related consequences. They're mostly providing helpful tips about the like practical logistics of being in the rapture when of course all the real Christians get zipped up to heaven. Lots of the videos that were linked in articles from last week. Those videos declaring

confidently about the upcoming rapture and yelling at the scoffers and mockers very, very loudly. Those links are coming up as 404 not found or switch to private account. No. You're crazy. Yeah, a lot of those went away. But I was able to find some good information in the form of end times checklists that weren't not found.

For example, one checklist said medicine, okay, Bibles, generally. Water, protein balls basement password scriptures posted front door code dog food stockpile

okay ethical auto pay utilities and then a final item said missing people question mark that was the final bottom line in that particular list I have so many questions first and foremost I'm pretty sure

protein balls are that peanut butter sugary treat thing you're supposed to do when you're working out to keep yourself high. That's a ball of protein. Protein. Also, auto pay utilities? You're worried you're going to ascend to heaven. Stolen like a thief in the night

and Christ is going to be like ooh with an outstanding water bill, Karen. Yeah, I don't think so. Maybe try the right hand. Or the left hand. Which one are they supposed to sit at? The other hand. I don't know. Their face, whatever. Yeah, I think what Karen believes is

that family members are evil. Like, she's getting zooped, but like the kid or the husband or something is secretly an atheist. So keep the water going in case. I don't know. If it's a kid, they wouldn't know how to pay for the water in the apocalypse times. The auto pays on. Yeah. Anyway, that checklist, that particular one, was from a lady wearing a Charlie Kirk t-shirt in TikTok video.

And, yeah, the top comment said, oh, sweet pee, we can see your shirt. You're not going anywhere. Enjoyed that. The other major common thread throughout those helpful tip videos was, seriously, this was like a focus for a lot of people. Don't be shitting when the rapture happens exactly.

It's really in quite a few of them, listener. I guess I understand. They weren't going into detail beyond the just don't be shitting, but I'm assuming people were like holding it or going really fast if they truly believe the rapture is happening. Yeah, just shotgun blasting it out

and really hoping they don't roll snake eyes. Yeah. And can I say, can I say, this is bigotry against irritable bowel syndrome survivors like myself. If the Lord wants me, he's going to have to want me shitting. Put on auto pay for Eli's ideas. Also the name of my country music song. If the Lord wants me going to want me a shitting.

Okay, that's excellent. We got to get in on that. Tell me the difference between that and every other piece of country music. In the last 30 years, you can't. I have no idea. You can't. Okay. And of course, some of the videos, I get it.

Yeah, they were satire for sure, making fun of the idiots doing apocalypse prep work and apocalypse errands ahead of time. But or not, it's impossible to tell. Like if the real idiots are apocalypse preppers, the fake idiots, the satire is indistinguishable because Pose law. And if your thing applies to Pose law that well, Stop being Christian. Stop being Christian.

Stop being Christian. Bottom line, I'm rooting hard for the rapture. That'll be fun. I think we all are. Yeah. And finally tonight in Oklahoma, hold up a minute news. I'll admit, Oklahoma superintendent of public instruction,

Ryan Walters, is kind of an easy target for us here on the scathing apis. Oh, Ryan Walters is back. Yes, his ideas are stupid. Yes, every time I bring him up, I get to raise the fact that he once accidentally showed a naked lady to school board members in his office

and then tried to leap out a window when turning off his TV was too much for him. But it's also because... Can't turn it off. How'd he turn off? Hack into the mainframe. He dove out the window. But it's also because he just keeps losing.

Right? He's not just a dangerous idiot. He's an incompetent dangerous idiot. And this week, Oklahoma Supreme Court struck down his insane, theocratic social study standards. So we're going to talk about it. Yeah.

Also, there's a rumor going around about Ryan Walters fucking a pile of flour during a Zoom call with the Board of Education. Now, did we make that up? Is it real? We have no confirmation on that one way or the other. That's what we're just asking questions and that's the point about Ryan Walters.

Exactly. Skeptical. News reporting. A medium-sized pile of flour. Exactly. So first off, a big thank you to Hammett Mehta over at the Friendly, Atheist Blog, for providing this information over at friendly atheist.com. We want Hemet to know he could also redirect from handsome, sexy atheist.com,

but it's the humbleness not to do so that makes us love him all the more. I think you parked that for a foot thing. I'm sure I did. I'm sure I did. I'd be able to use that unless you wanted to do that foot thing. It really doesn't. Right. So if you are unfamiliar with this story,

Walters first presented his new standards back in December. Then he had them approved by the school board without telling them about a bunch of secret changes he had made to those standards in February, then they were passed by Oklahoma's Republican legislature in May. Yeah, to be clear, that legislature knew about the secret changes trick by May when they were voting on it. They were just hoping everyone would shut the fuck up and let this happen, and they have tons of Republicans in both parts of the House and the Senate. So, legislature just let that happen. Yeah. So what standards are we talking about exactly? I'll quote directly from Hemet's blog here.

Quote, in those standards, Walters demanded that teachers tell kids that the 2020 election had major discrepancies, it did not. There were security risks with mail-in ballots and sudden batch dumps. There were not. And that COVID originated in a Chinese lab, despite no conclusive proof of that. Sudden batch dumps is also something in Eli's country. That's also, that's the follow-up sequel for his IBS album. Yeah, it's a double-hand.

with me and Uncle Cracker. We wrote it together. Continuing the quote here, it incorporated the phrase, Gulf of America. It removed certain requirements that taught about racial discrimination and the Black Lives Matter movement, end quote. Yeah, it's just like Grock AI sitting at the bar after the lights turn on after close, yelling a social studies curriculum to absolutely nobody. That's what the curriculum was. Now, sadly for us here, the scathing atheist and all people have reasoned everywhere, none of that is a little. Being stupid and theocratic is basically our national bird at this point, but that rushing through the school board, which also included a bunch of lying about when they had to vote

by, that was illegal. Add to the effect that textbook publishers refused to print his insane new requirements, Oklahoma school districts were now being forced to choose between teaching sane stuff and possibly losing their funding. Well, as I said, this week, the Oklahoma Supreme Court voted five to two to put a temporary block on the Walter's curriculum, while one of the lawsuits against them, Randall v. Walters, continues making its way through the legal process. Yeah, just to be clear about like the scope here, the relative thing that's happening, Ryan Walters got scolded by the Oklahoma Supreme Court. Yeah. They were like, you're too Christian for us. The Oklahoma Supreme Court. Now, I know what you're thinking,

podcast listener. How is Rai Rai taking the loss? Well, the answer is not well. Walter said the decision is, quote, embarrassing and clearly out of step with Oklahomans, adding, they're ignoring the fact that in other states the Bible is openly taught as the cornerstone of Western civilization. Christianity, American exceptionalism, and conservative values are under attack. And the Oklahoma Supreme Court is leading the assault. End of exact. quote. Yeah, and a guy named Gettner Drummond is my super woke adversary in a lot of this, along with the Oklahoma Supreme Court, the woke's over there. Also, Ryan, Rye Rai, as he has known, Eli pointed out, yes, that is his nickname. As Rai Rai pointed out, he would like everybody to know

that his pile of flowers for his easy bake oven. It makes sense that he has that. And his team of Cyber Ninja investigators is going to find the person responsible. for the flower fucking deep fake. It is a deep fake. They're also going to find the porn projecting bandit responsible for putting Jackie Chan porn on his TV when it turned on.

And they're going to find the person who murdered Nicole Brown Simpson still at large. Same guy. Yeah. Out there. Stalking the night. So much like the history he's hoping to teach, Walters is

ignoring the problem. I think the best solution is for him and the school board to sit down, turn on all the screens in his office very quickly and just talk things through. Ryan, I know we can make this happen, buddy. All right. On that image of Ryan Walters

getting dick rolled again by his TV power button, we're going to wrap up the headlines. Eli, thanks as always. I can't turn it off. And when we come back, ah, he's out the window. When we come back, we'll have Don Ford, voice of things that a Jedi craves not.

For some Bible peace theater. Paral! Cover your eye! Wetlands. You're saying it kind of weird. Okay, it's not wet lands. If you're trying to get me to say... I mean, they are wetlands, though.

Thank you, Don. Hi, you're here, by the way. Hey, Don. Yeah, I was actually here the entire episode. It's true, he was. Oh, you are? Yeah, no, it's fine. I ate a cliff bar.

So I'm good. Nice. Oh, that's usually where Noah walks in and tells us it's time for Bible. Yeah, you mean the part of the show where we act out the Bible so our listeners don't have to read it. Exactly. Thank you for picking up the cue. Nailed it. So, what are we on now?

The epistle to the Romans, whereas it's more commonly known, just Romans. Ooh, a letter. That doesn't seem super easy for us to, like, act out. Oh, you'd be surprised. Let's get into it. To whoops, it may concern. No. Hey, Paul.

What's you doing there? Hey, Paul. Oh, hey, Thomas. Hey, Peter. I'm just writing a letter to the Romans. Ooh, can we help? Can we help with the letter? Yeah.

I mean, it's supposed to just be from me. Okay, right. But historically speaking, did you actually? You know what? You know what? Great point. Let me just run a couple of these by you guys. Oh, nice.

Okay, let's see. How's it going? It's me, Paul. You probably remember me as Saul from when I was persecuting Christians. Boy, boy, oh, boy, was I wrong. Oh, it turns out there was this guy named Jesus, who's a descendant from David, and he... Um, sorry, was he? Guys, I'm kind of writing a letter here.

I need to be able to get into it. Well, actually, I, uh, I had the same question. I mean, whether or not Joseph is related to David is... Is clearly spelled out in Matthew. Thank you very much. We did this. Yeah, no, no, I remember the big genealogy at the front, but... Didn't God impregnate Mary?

Yeah. David isn't Jesus' death. Yes, he is. We already settled this in Matthew. We'd sell... I feel like he didn't. Anyway, he's descended of David, and this letter is to everyone in Rome.

Why wouldn't you just start the letter with to the Rome? I forgot, because you guys made me nervous. Okay? Anyways, this letter is to everybody in Rome. Okay. I would like some money to come visit you and tell you about Jesus. Jews got to believe first, and then the Greeks, and it's like I always say, that just shall live by faith.

Ooh. What? What, I thought that was a nice... Ah, I'm just worried that quote might be taken to mean that all that matters is believing in Jesus. Oh, yeah, yeah. Feels like that could get to be a whole schism if you don't take care of it. Yeah, it's not clear. I mean, guys, don't be silly.

Imagine how ridiculous that would be. neighbor neighbor quick don't you see my house is on fire i do see that yeah um why aren't you helping me oh because uh i'm christian my leg you're a christian but what does that have to do with anything kind of has to do with everything magey i work by faith not by works oh okay but shouldn't your faith make you do good works, isn't that the whole... Sometimes it will, sometimes it won't, but it's not really the point. The belief is the point.

Oh, my other leg! A belief is the point. Why would the belief be the point? I don't know, man. Like, people have differing abilities to do good works in their life. Like, should someone be damned to hell because they were born paralyzed from the scalp down?

That's what you think the problem with the system is? It's for people. Plus, plus, you're on earth for like, I don't know, 100 years max, then eternity in heaven. What's one afternoon of helping with a fire? That's nothing. Okay, fine. What really matters is faith.

Now, will you please do something? Oh, I'm doing something. What are you doing? I brought marshmallows. Back to your leg! It's a fire, Greg. We're all on fire. I think you guys are reading into it too much.

I think you just made Ray Comfort's career. Yeah. Okay. Anyways. it's time for me to talk about non-believers. So, this is pretty serious stuff because God's wrath is on them, and God's existence is known in all things that he created. So, you know, they have no excuse.

Feels like that's going to cause some problems. Mabutu Ambaway, step forward. Wow. Who, who are you? I am St. Peter. Keeper of the gates of heaven. For your failure to accept Jesus as your personal Savior, you will now burn in hell for all eternity.

Wait, no, sorry. Who's that? Who did you say? Who's what? Is it Jesus or something? Oh, damn it. Not another one. Hold on. Let me check here. Yes, yes. Remote tribe died when we were 15.

Okay, not it. So, okay, like 2,000 years ago, there was a guy named Jesus. He was crucified for your sins, and you were supposed to accept him as your Lord and Savior. But you didn't, obviously. You know that. So, you're going to burn in hell. Okay, but nobody ever told me about Jesus. Okay, but you saw trees, right?

You saw the sun and the mountains and the sky. I was actually born blind. Oh, yeah, I missed that part right here. Uh, well, I'm sure someone told you about the mountains and the sky. I actually had a pretty severe intellectual disability as well. Oh, my God, with this guy. Uh, look, the point is that the mountains as far as you understood them were evidence that a carpenter died for your sins 2,000 years ago. And you should have accepted Jesus as your...

your savior, okay? Sorry, what percentage of Christians believe this? Oh, the number is way higher than you would think, like way higher. Wow. Oh, right? Ridiculous. Dude, rough. Oh, God, you guys are so picky.

Oh, are we? Okay, let's talk about gay people. Oh, we're talking about gay people? Yeah, I feel like, yeah, I feel like Jesus didn't really cover gay people. So I want to take this moment here to say right now explicitly that God makes wicked women lesbians and wicked men gay. God does that. And then they become filled with unrighteousness and fornication and wickedness and covetousness and maliciousness. And they're full of envy and they're full of murder and they're full of debate and they're full of deceit and malignity and whispers.

Whispers? Yeah. They're also backbiders, haters of God. Yeah, I know. Despiteful, proud boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents without understanding, covenant breakers, without natural affection, implacable and unmerciful. Implacable feels like a weird.

They should all be killed, and so should anybody who takes pleasure in any bad behavior. That's, like, extremely far from what Jesus actually said. I know, right? Yeah. Yeah. Like, Jesus was pretty explicitly wrathful about the people who denied. He was the Messiah, but... Oh, yeah.

He didn't talk about gay people, like, at all. No. Yeah, no, not at all. Not even a little, not even a mention. Not the word at all. Right. So I am making up for that. Got it.

Okay, so what's the next part? Are you ready for the next part right after the whole thing? I just said it back down. No, it's don't judge other people. Oh, you don't say. Yep. Huh. Okay.

Okay. I can tell you guys are kind of bummed out by that last part. So this next one is a little bit of a take-home miracle, if you will. So you're ready for this? Sure. If you break God's laws, your circumcision will be undone. Oh, so like the covenant with God is broken kind of thing, huh? No, I can see how you would think it's a metaphor.

No, what I am saying is that your foreskin will grow back onto the glands of your... Wow, not a metaphor. Nope. Wait, it's not a metaphor? Yeah, the Bible says your foreskin will grow back if you break God's laws. Yep, but it doesn't, though. No, it doesn't. Actually, this is another anti-Greek thing.

This is an anti-Greek thing? Yeah, so in Greece, having a foreskin was considered a sign of masculinity, beauty, and civility. So Greek men and some Jews who had been circumcised started wearing kynodesme. Oh, those things you look through with a different. colors that you get at a science museum? No, no, it's a little leather strap you'd use to tie your foreskin

closed. I'm sorry is this in the Bible? No, it is not. But the Christians who still considered themselves Jews at that point between the 5th and 8th centuries were probably offended by the practice. So this made it into Romans as a burn

against anyone who'd regrown their foreskin. Because of the kaleidoscope thing. Bible's weird, huh? Sure is, man. Yeah, sure is. Okay, next part. This is important. So, everyone's a murderer and a destroyer of nations, right? No, man. Very, very few actual destroyers of nations. Very few. Let me finish. Let me finish. They're murders and

destroyers of nations. In that, they break God's laws. So everyone who breaks God's laws is like equally bad? Yeah, I mean, in the eyes of God, yeah. Uh, why? Well, because they broke God's laws, and breaking God's laws is the worst thing you can do.

Worst in murder? Yeah, because murder is breaking God's laws. Oh, got it. So, uh, pretty wild that Jesus never mentioned any of this stuff. I know, right? It's like, it's a good thing that I'm writing this letter, huh? Yeah.

Good thing. Because no one would know. Mm-hmm. I feel like we should mention it. Hell, though. Hey, guys. Oh, hey. What's going on, Peter?

So I was thinking, you know before when I was talking about the faith versus works thing? I feel like I should clarify that. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. We were actually thinking that, too. That's good. Yeah. Because it just gets said over and over in the Bible that you have to serve God. And we're really just exploring the idea of faith as like tantamount here.

in this book that I'm writing right now. Exactly, yeah. So I'm going to explain that faith was the only reason that Abraham could fuck when he was old. Abraham? Yeah. You know how they have that whole story

that's like about obeying God no matter what and then he gets a son as a result of me? It's foundational like pretty much everything. Right. So he could only fuck when he was 100 because he believed in God. And you think that's, going to clear things up. I do, yes. Got it. Hey, Peter. Yeah. Yeah, so we were wondering

if everyone is damned by sin, which they are, I have been very clear about this. And good works don't matter. Not at all, not even a little bit. Yeah, okay, so we got a question then. Uh-huh. Oh, I know what you're going to say. Shouldn't we do a bunch of sinning so that there's even more grace when we're forgiven? What? Definitely not our question. Okay, no, I I thought the same thing. So the answer is you could do as much sinning and breaking laws as you like,

but the grace is just the one saving. So it's not, there's not really any point to it, but I love where you were, like, mentally. So you're saying now, no matter how much sinning we do, we are all saved equally. Yeah, isn't it great? No. No, no, that sets up a moral standard.

where, like, unrepentant child murderers are as equally saved as people who J-Wong. That is correct. Yeah, that's the system I'm describing. Oh, yeah, that seems like a really bad system. Terrible. Okay, well, don't do the crime if you can't do the time. But crimes have different punishments. Not to God, they don't.

Okay, okay. Hypothetically, if we want to follow the law, just because the system someone is describing is insane. But, but we would still be faithful. to Jesus, okay? Right. Would that be okay? Yeah, you would think that, right?

Because there's just like totally separate belief statements. But no, actually, that is cheating on Jesus. Cheating? Yeah, that's the metaphor I'm going to use. So you know how if you're married to someone and then you marry someone else, that's adultering? Uh, yeah. Said marry weird.

Well, that's what it's like trying to be faithful to Jesus and also follow laws. it's adultery. To follow laws? Mm-hmm, because you're having faith in the laws. Got it. All right, all right, next section. I can tell you guys were pretty bummed out by the last part again. So are you guys ready?

Yeah, sure. Okay, so you know how God knows everything? Right. And now that there's this concept of salvation, you'd think that would mean that God knows who's damned and who's not, wouldn't you? you. Yeah, sure. Well, now I am going to clarify that that is very much the case. So God knows who's going to be damned? And he makes them that way. And he still sends them to

hell forever? Yes. Okay, that also sounds awful. It's like you're packing all of the bad Christianity takes into one letter. I am, yes, but if the person, because this is part, you're going to Trust me, if the person reading this letter can read it, it means they might be chosen. And if they're chosen, then nothing can stop them from being saved. Unless God already determined they're not safe. Right. But he might not have...

That is a weirdly whimsical tone. Who knows? God? He does. Yeah. He does. All right, guys. I think that's enough writing for now, don't you?

Yeah, it just still feels like kind of a bummer. Yeah, yeah. A bummer? How so? Well, honestly, we thought you were going to go to Rome to preach salvation, and all the Gospels so far have been about salvation. Yeah, you just keep listing people who God hates and how they're damned to hell by God with no control over their own lives.

Seems kind of hopeless and sad by comparison. This is going to lead to nihilism. I understand. I understand. So let's cheer it up a little bit. Think of it this way. If a potter makes a pot, right? Like he made it on like one of those...

You know, I understand. You've seen those on TikTok? No, I understand completely. Isn't it his right to smash that pot? Yeah, but we're not pots. We're people. Ah, but not to God you're not. To God, you're just pots full of sin that he made.

and filled so he could so he could smash him is this metaphor actually in the Bible it is actually the end of the chapter is that a whole end great and on that psychopathic note we'll take a break from the Bible but we'll be back in a month

with even more Bible peace and that's all the blasphemy we've got for you tonight but we'll be back in 10,022 minutes with more You can't wait that long, be on the lookout for a brand new episode of our sister show, The Skeptocrat, debuting at 7am Eastern on Monday. An even newer episode of our sister show's hot friend God-awful movies, debuting at 7am Eastern on Tuesday, and an even newer episode of our half-sister show citation needed,

debuting at noon Eastern on Wednesday. And don't forget our really good personality show, D&D Minus, dropping twice a month on the first and third Friday after the first Wednesday. Also, big thanks to Don Ford, voice of Fantasenia. adventure for the amazing Bible piece work and for the mortal remains of that puppy. Don knows what I'm talking about. And of course, a big thanks to all the generous new donors who will be featured in some kind of thematic listing presentation next time around. If you're feeling generous like those fine people, you can make a per episode donation at

patreon.com slash scathing atheist. And that'll get your early access to an extended ad-free version of every episode. Or you can make a one-time donation by clicking on the donate button on the right side of the home page at skatingatheist.com. You can also help us add a ton by leaving us a five-store review, telling a friend about the show, and following us on social media. And speaking of social media, Tim Robertson handles that for us. And our audio engineer is Morgan Clark, who also wrote all the music used in this episode, which was used with permission.

If you have questions, comments, or death threats, we'll find all the contact info on the contact page at skatingatheast.com. And it's, it's sex. Yeah. Yeah, they're well done. Well done. Absolutely. All right.

I went into a fugue state while looking at that. Yeah, the cats and kids. You brought me right into it. Yeah. You were the DJ. Sometimes I sell a little bit of sex. Damn right, you do. Like the pot.

And I fucking buy it. A little bit of sex. Dude, there's a girl who makes big long pots and I'm like, ah. Because I like, don't get me wrong, I like it, but I would like her to, let me say this. If she came on and was just like, hey guys, I know, and I'm 100% okay with it, I would, I'd do that thing where you could sign up for notifications every time she posts a video, right? Okay. But I just, I live in fear that she's like, everyone writes gross stuff on my pottery videos. And I'm like, I don't want you to feel, because there's so many people out there who are like, kind of like, I don't.

Only a fan. If she started an OnlyFant so I could give her $15 and live assured that she knows what product she's delivering, I'd be so happy. No, I'm gross, but nice. Right. I want a nice thing. I want a nice, I want a consensual relationship, financial relationship. You grew up in a time when the movie Ghost and that pottery scene was very important to sexual development. You're doing it. But I want a certain age. I'm on Asa's OnlyFans. It's the best. You get an NBA and porn.

she's the smartest business person she's so smart it's crazy are you doing the NBA program on her only fans yeah nice it's mixed in with a porn I don't have a choice or is the porn mixed in with the NBA I go hard to set the preceding podcast was a production of puzzle on a thunderstorm LLC copyright 2025 all rights reserved