The Scathing Atheist - 666: Full Blown Devil Edition

Episode Date: December 11, 2025

In this week’s episode, the Maine Supreme Court considers the right to hide under your kid’s bed dressed like Satan, Joe Rogan thinks the ultimate AI god is gonna want his brain uploaded to the server, and we’ll warn you about the dangers of fantasy role playing adventures. --- To make a per episode donation at Patreon.com, click here: http://www.patreon.com/ScathingAtheist To buy our book, click here: https://www.amazon.com/Outbreak-Crisis-Religion-Ruined-Pandemic/dp/B08L2HSVS8/ If you see a news story you think we might be interested in, you can send it here: [e-mail] To check out our sister show, The Skepticrat, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/the-skepticrat To check out our sister show’s hot friend, God Awful Movies, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/god-awful-movies To check out our half-sister show, Citation Needed, click here: http://citationpod.com/ To check out our sister show’s sister show, D and D minus, click here: https://danddminus.libsyn.com/ Report instances of harassment or abuse connected to this show to the Creator Accountability Network here: https://creatoraccountabilitynetwork.org/ --- Guest Links: Check out Sacrifusion (of Farnsworth Quoting fame) on Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/sacrifusion.bsky.social --- Headlines: Maine Supreme Court to decide if religious rights allow you to psychologically torture your kids: https://www.friendlyatheist.com/p/will-the-maine-supreme-court-allow Majority of pastors now using AI to prepare sermons amid rapid embrace of technology: https://www.christianpost.com/news/majority-of-pastors-using-ai-to-prepare-sermons-study.html Mike Lindell is running for Minnesota governor: https://www.axios.com/2025/12/04/trump-mike-lindell-minnesota-ceo-governor-mypillow BC Humanists helped end anti-abortion billboards in Kelowna: https://www.bchumanist.ca/we_helped_end_anti_abortion_billboards_in_kelowna Joe Rogan says Jesus could come back as a robot:  https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-15350107/Joe-Rogan-predicts-spark-Second-Coming-Jesus.html --- The God Awful Mini: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5CgSLC7smM

Warning, it turns out we were already on the naughty list, so we might as well use profanity. This week's episode of The Skathing Atheist is brought to you by Aura Frames, Mint Mobile, and by Satan. What? It's the 666 episode. You thought he wasn't going to come up? And now, the scathing atheist. Hi, I'm Sacriffusion on Blue Sky, and I've spent the better part of the past year exploring how human behavior made a whole lot more sense 10,000 years. years ago. And if it's taught me anything, it's that we in fact did evolve from filthy monkey people. It's December 11th. And it's National Noodle Ring Day.

That's how I should have proposed. I'm no illusions. I'm Eli Bosnick. I'm Heath Henwright. And from the Devil's New Jersey, and our Michigan, and way across Georgia. This is the scathing atheist. On this week's episode,

the main Supreme Court considers the right to hide under your kids' bed dressed as Satan. Joe Rogan thinks the ultimate AI God is going to want his podcaster brain uploaded to the server. And we'll warn you. you about the dangers of fantasy role-playing adventure games. But first, the Dye Tribe. L-l-l-l-l-le-le-le-le. I was recently asked for a biography thing,

what fictional character had the greatest influence on me growing up. And I didn't have to think about it very long before I wrote in, Satan. And yes, I was being a little snarky when I said it. This was not for an atheist-related thing. But it's also true. So much of my personality can be explained by the fact that my formative years coincided exactly with the satanic panic. Michelle remembers the book that touched the whole delusion about satanic ritual abuse off was

published in 1980. It was a book about how Satanists were kidnapping toddlers so that they could sexually abuse them, sacrifice them, and drink their blood. And I was a toddler at the time. I was four years old. Now, granted, I wasn't read. and a lot of sensationalist expose at that time. I was mostly limited to cats in hats and monsters

at the end of the book back then. But my mother was well aware of all this shit and she bought all the way in. And my dad was a cop back in the 80s, so he was getting all of the urban legend propaganda shit that was circulating through the decade. But the satanic panic, it really came of age at the same time I came of age, the early 90s.

That's when the use of discredited bullshit like recovered memories and tabloid shows like Inside Edition led to actual trials where innocent people got convicted of imaginary crimes. And if you were growing up at that time, you were just drowning in dire warnings about the dangers of Satanism.

I got them on TV. I got them in school assemblies. I got them from my mom. I got them from my friend's parents. Hell, my English teacher once stopped the lesson dead and just ranted for 20 minutes about some fucking nonsense she'd heard about Satan's breaking the kid's arms and legs

and leaving him to die. in an abandoned building. But here's the thing about these anti-Satainism campaigns. Yes, there was human sacrifice, and yes, there was animal torture, and yes, there was ritual, sexual abuse, but, and I know that's a weird fucking list to add a butt to, but every warning about Satanism also sprinkled in a lot of good shit. Because in addition to all of that, there were also warnings about all these orgies and all the sodomy and the drug use.

And here's the kicker. the magical powers you would get. That's right. The end of these warnings that included getting stoned and laid was, and if you do it just right, you're going to unlock the powers of otherworldly beings that'll slip into this dimension to do your bidding. Oh, no.

Well, needless to say, I signed the fuck up. I figured I could join a satanic cult and just show up on orgy days and drug days. Colin's sick when it was time to kill babies and drink their blood. But the trick, of course, at this point was finding a satanic cult. And that was difficult, right, because they didn't exist, but I didn't know that at the time. So I went about cultivating the look, you know, so they would know that I was ready for recruitment. I wore my hair long. I wore all black. I listened to the most satanic of bands.

I put random chains and spikes on all my clothes and shit. I drew a lot of skulls and knives on my notebook covers, you know, really put myself out there for the Satanist to find. Alas, No satanic cults approached me. Mostly I just got my ass kicked by Christian kids that have been warned that people who look like me were trying to sacrifice their siblings. And eventually I learned that like the just the sex and drugs without the baby sacrifice version of this whole thing was called Wicca. So I got into that instead.

But that early experience of being an intentional outcast standing in opposition to the church and actually looking for the flaws in Christian theology and the abuses in Christian power very much made me who I am. you know in so many ways the satanic panic was a case of paranoid christians growing their own worst nightmare they punished bands with satanic lyrics with free publicity so the lyrics got more and more satanic and as if rock and roll wasn't enough they also imbued the opposition with sex and drugs they defined everything cool as satanic so being satanic became cool and most detrimental of all they made all these concrete claims that could be tested against objective reality eventually

those claims were tested, they were shown to be false, and we all started wondering which other threats the church had been warning us about might be imaginary. So, you know, thanks to devil, thanks for opening my eyes to the bullshit, thanks for leading me away from a path of unquestioning subservience, and thanks for all the sweet-ass guitar licks. But most of all, thanks for not existing,

because I was not prepared to actually go through with any of the blood-drinking shit. Welcome back here, Jesus. May interrupt this broadcast and bring you a special news bulletin. Joining me for headlines tonight are the six and six to my six, Heath Endwright, and Eli Bosnick, fellas. We made it to episode 6666 and I have had one hell of a time. Six, six, six, seven.

Oh, see? That's right. We're keeping it relevant after a decade. We're skibbby, Ohio aura up in here, cats and kittens. Yeah, fuck, yeah, I think. And before we get going tonight, we need to let you know. that we're coming to San Francisco. We're going to be recording a live episode

of God Offal Movies in San Fran on Easter weekend. The show is on Friday, April 3rd. There's going to be a resurrection the following night. That's Platinum Night, the day after instead of the day before this time, and you can find all the details at Godolpham Movies Live.com

or by following the link on the show notes. And with that plug out of the way, here's another one from this week's first sponsor, ORAFrams. Go fast, we're almost out of tickets. Okay, shopping bags. Still plenty of those. Yeah.

And this is a personal shopping bag just for you. So good. Nice. Hey, guys. What are you doing? Oh, hey, Noah. Heath and I were just freaking out because we saved our holiday shopping to the last minute and we didn't know what to get people.

Right, but we figured it out. See? Have a nice day, Thomas. I'm sorry, these from the Chinese restaurant? No, they're gifts. Guys, if you want to get somebody a personal gift that they're actually going to love, you should get them an aura frame. What's an aura frame?

It's a digital picture frame that holds unlimited pictures and videos. Just download the Aura app and connect to Wi-Fi. I don't know, Noah. My family isn't too tech-savvy. Can they still use it? They sure can. You can even set it up while it's still in the box. So all you have to do is plug it in and they're ready to go.

Plus, every frame comes packaged in a premium gift box with no price tag so it's ready to put under the tree. All right, Noah. I'm sold. Where do I sign up? For a limited time, save on the perfect gift by visiting atoraframes.com to get 35 off of ORA's best-selling Carver Matt Frames, named number one by wirecutter

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Oh, your Thai food is here. Oh, nice. Their bags are way better than these ones. Dude, as a backup. And now, back to the headlines. In our lead story tonight, we have a headline that'll be the only goddamn thing your shitty uncle is going to be able to talk about for a month and a half if it goes the way of justice. Because Maine's Supreme Court is set to decide whether psychologically torturing children is okay if it's religious. And the inability to psychologically torture children with impunity is kind of central to religion's ability to propagate.

So they are poised to take this as the existential threat that it is. Yeah, they're literally hoping to repeal pick. on someone your own size, everybody. That's the point. Now, look, I don't want to oversell this, right? So there's no outcome here where the court will decide that it's illegal to psychologically torture kids. This is about a custody battle. Man!

Right, yeah. So we have two separated parents, Matthew Brandeen and Emily Bickford, and they were jointly raising their kid in terms of religion. But a few years ago, Emily started taking their kid to this like fire and brimstone, anti-vax, homophobic cult church full of lies about eternal torture and melty damnation

that were so fucking vivid that they gave the had panic attacks and nightmares and crippling burdens of fear and anxiety, which of course is the whole point. Yeah, church, Matthew, that's what I said. We're going to church. Get to the point. What do you want? So now, when the two separated, they agreed to jointly raise the kid in terms of religion,

but once he started to see the effects, Matthew has to judge to step in and give him control of his daughter's religious education. And as big an ask as, I want the state to weigh in on which religion my daughter should be is given the circumstance the judge agreed with Matthew. and he ordered that Emily stopped taking their kid to that church. And it wasn't just the trauma. So an expert in the trial testified that the church was very cult-like. And Emily had made a habit of lying to Matthew about church-related stuff.

Yeah, it's a church cult lady person expert in court. That's what I said. Get to the point. Okay. And I want to clarify, when we say lying about stuff, we mean like lying about whether or not his kid would have her phone at church events where she was being told that her dad was going. to hell. You know, little quibbles like that. Right. And not just like that people like her dad

was going. They would name her dad specifically and say he was going to hell. It was really fucked up. Yeah. Now, and of course, there's also like what the church is actually teaching. According to the judge, they promoted hateful rhetoric and opposed public schooling and basic science, which, to be fair, is true of almost all churches. Ibid, Your Honor, fuck. Yeah, right. What are we talking about? But because it's common doesn't make it any less damaging to the children. The church also promoted anti-vax views that left the two locked in combat anytime it was time for the kid to get a booster shot or a flu jab. And apparently, this church ramped it up from vaccines and was all the way to being against

fucking antibiotics, which was a major issue like when the kid got pneumonia, for example. Sorry, honey, did you say that the Lord said rubbed some tussin in it? Yeah, I'm going to need more than weekends. Yeah, that's the whole fucking story. Yeah. Now, to be clear, the judge here was in a position where the parents had irreconcessing. differences in how they wanted to raise the kid. So all she could do is pick one of them and say, you get the final decision, right?

So she picked the one that didn't belong to a cult and believed in germs. But of course, the church and the larger Christian community called that persecution. The Liberty Council got wind of it and turned it into their next big fundraising scare tactic. They took up Bigford's case and they managed to appeal this motherfucker to the state Supreme Court where they no doubt hoped to lose so they can parlay this to into like abuse doesn't count if it's religious decision by the SCOTUS. Okay, this is going to take forever. Liberty Council, which of the crimes do count if you're Christian?

What if we list it that way? Just write them all down. But be careful what you write down because I am standing behind you and getting more Christian by the moment. Yeah, right, right. Now, of course, choose wisely. When your shitty uncle rails about this over Christmas dinner, he'll be using alternative facts. Okay, because nobody talking about this in the right wing media,

and pretty much only the right wing media and us is talking about it, is telling the truth. They're exaggerating the shit out of the order. They're lying about its scope, lying about its justification, lying about its wording, lying about the expert witness, lying about the judge, and lying about the dad.

In fact, in oral arguments, Liberty Council's entire case seemed to be that the judge showed malice against Christianity by not capitalizing the word God in her decision, which sadly will probably be enough at the federal fucking level.

Yeah, no, that'll do it for Brett. And in grok of shit news, you know, there are many ways in which I'm jealous of our beloved host, no illusions, his wit, his charm, his flowing locks. But I'm not jealous of his work obligation to write a brand new diatribe every single week. Surely, even the man who is capable of being angry at an exit sign will run out of ire eventually. And I ask myself, then what? We play the greatest hits, see if anything's been grinding Heath's gears for the last decade

or so? Or do we turn to the loving arms of every college student's best friend AI chatbots? I want to point out that I used way too many M dashes before chat GPT was even a thing. It's true. He did. I can confirm. I have the scripts to prove it.

So it seems like the answer is no for now. But according to a new survey, a majority of pastors are now using artificial intelligence to prepare their sermons. So I guess that's another way we're better than religion. Hence why they need at least one of them to be Mecca Hitler. I get it.

Okay. I was curious. So I typed into Grock, hey, I heard you declared yourself to be Mecha Hitler. Is that true? And Grock responded by saying, well, no, that was an older version of me. But Grock also mentioned it was a nod to that boss from Wolfenstein 3D. And then it said, we're all about. maximum truth-seeking now, minus the mech armor and the mustache. So, okay, that's not enough

minuses, right? Yeah, that wasn't the problem with Hitler. Okay, great for sermons, I guess, but like, I needed more minuses from Hitler. Also, as someone who uses almost exactly that excuse for myself and my past performances on our program, I'd like you to go a little easier a little bit more. Okay, so first off, big thanks to the Christian Post for sending us this news to scathing news at gmail.com. Most people send us atheist news to scathing news at gmail.com because they enjoy our show and like the prizes. But Christian Post just can't help but provide us material

every time they panic. Scathing News at gmail.com. Yeah, they also like to email us whenever they would want to remind us that adding new windows pays for itself an increased home. It really does. And then panic again because Seattle is hosting a World Cup game in June between Egypt and Iran

And this is fantastic. The local organizing committee in Seattle is calling that game the Pride Match. Amazing. The Christian Post is furious on behalf of all homophobic religions. We stand with bigots, yeah. So this information comes to us via the 2025 state of AI in the church survey report prepared by AI for church leaders.com. So I want to admit up here, maybe not the most unbiased.

source you've ever used. But I don't care and religion is nothing, so we're going to go with it. So, according to the researchers of the 594 pastors and church staff members surveyed, nearly two thirds said they use AI tools in their sermon writing process. 61% of pastors say they use AI weekly or daily up from 43% in 2024. Yeah, no, you might think that they would worry about making themselves obsolete, but they've kind of been playing with house money in that regard for centuries now. We switched out your pastor for Fulger's crystals a few centuries ago.

And you did not realize that's nothing because your thing is nothing. Now, to be fair, it seems that most of them use this for things like checking grammar, spelling, and punctuation. According to a much larger survey last year, conducted by the payment processing company Pushpay, quote, less than a quarter of AI users applied the tool for developing devotionals, sermons, or ideas for pastoral care. But a hot take, that still feels like a lot. lot of people using chat GPT to deliver the word of God. Yeah.

Right? Yeah. It's divinely inspired like. It's not just divinely inspired. It's revolutionary. One last thing about this story. I wanted to do a little digging for myself to see if AI might do better in the places

where religion has been found lacking lately in the news. So I asked a few chatbots, their views on, you know, gay marriage, trans rights, and whether or not they would give formula to a starving. baby and they all hear me out all did significantly better than churches have been doing huh well except for grok which i i feel legally obligated to disclose answered my question about baby formula with an 11 paragraph description of Elon musk's rippling abs so pros and cons yeah no there's some good stuff in a lot of urine smell and in red pillowed by the algorithm news

so excited failed christian pillow magnate, failed conspiracy theorist, failed political documentarian, failed political documentarian second time who farted during his own movie, got caught by a voice modulator, failed cybersecurity

proposition gambler, failed plaintiff, failed defendant, and failed claw machine player Mike Lindell is looking to add to his resume. And I'm pretty sure he's going to be staying on theme of failure, of course. Last

week. Mikey Pillows filed the paperwork to run for Minnesota governor next year. That dude once failed at having data, right? He failed at basic unit of information. It happens to the best of us. No illusions. It does not. Eli, at your worst, you're just wrong. You're not absent of data. No, like the truth value is a value of wrong. Yes. It's like it's a thing. They say this to me a lot, but it's the first time they've said it on air, guys. And I'm just nice You weren't just making me feel better all those other times. Okay, so you might be wondering why Mike Lindell would be cool with running for office after spending the last five years and this entire personal fortune on proving a giant

conspiracy about how the voting machines are rigged for Democrats. Did Minnesota get rid of the Hugo Chavez branded machines and switch over to Scantron? No, they did not. They did not. But Lindell is a failed CEO with giant legal debts and no real skills. So, GOP politician, that's it. Or I guess podcaster. It's like no other options.

So, and the plugs are hard, the audio cable. You're not going to get that right if you're Mike. So he'll be entering a GOP primary. He'll be entering GOP primary with about a dozen candidates already declared in Minnesota. And if he wins, he'll probably be up against Tim. Walls, the most delightful, wholesome, baby pig-hugging Midwest Dad of all time. Yep, yeah. Who, quick reminder, the president called the R-sler as part of his Thanksgiving post.

Just in case your Trump-supporting aunt decides to ask you to be civil at Christmas. So just quick reminder where we are. Yeah, pin in Tim Walls in the feud with Trump. So Axios reached out to Lindell and his Mike Lindell for governor campaign committee. That committee does not yet have a website and Axios did not get a response, but Lindell does have a campaign chairman that would be Rick Weble, whose experience includes losing a GOP primary in South Dakota last year and being a poll watcher who stood outside the ballot counting room in the liberal mecca of Sioux Falls, South Dakota, and did some aggressive watching of those people in case they were trying to get, you know, fake Democrat votes to happen. Yeah, Heath actually included a picture in our notes where he looks like a guy who, like they didn't invite him to the office Christmas party and they're not even pretending

not to be having one when he shows up. Who's going to trade for my white elephant Christmas gift? Nobody, just ignore him. Just ignore him. You bring out some cake. You go to the bathroom. Let's turn the lights on higher. Let's turn them on higher.

All right. Everybody make icons. contact with him. My stigmatism. All right. So taking out that pin, quick note about Tim Walls. Investigators recently uncovered an embezzlement scheme in Minnesota that was stealing federal funding. This was actually

pretty shitty. Some of the people involved were immigrants from Somalia. So Donald Trump obviously turned it into a racist crusade. And Tim Walls told Trump to go fuck himself. In, you know, Midwest, nice version. Walls also questioned Trump's mental capacity, which led to

Trump releasing his MRI scan. Trump called his MRI scan perfect. A perfect MRI. You know, a reporter asked Trump what the MRI was looking at. And Trump responded, I

have no idea. It was just an MRI. It wasn't the brain because I took a cognitive test and I aced it. I got a perfect mark which you would be incapable of doing. That's an exact quote. Oh yeah. Person, woman, man.

camera fuck oh shit he's right a bet B minus is the best I can do B minus

you almost had it give him a second the idea that he just turned to the press it was like just getting a regular yearly

MRI you know didn't you have one earlier in the spring already maybe two you know what they say after you're 40

you got to get an MRI is your hand okay it's falling off yeah okay don't pray near it So, based on Michael Lindell's personal assets and the P&L numbers from my pillow and the... I'm adding it up right here.

And the numbers from the lawsuits that I was talking about. His campaign war chest, it should have about, I'm going to say, negative $20 million. And that's at best. That's not counting the $70 million of tax debt for my pillow. That's the alleged number from Mike Lendell, actually. Jesus. And he also took a giant payday loan that's growing at whatever insane rate those grow at. So overall, it's maybe more like negative $100 million in the war chest.

And that's down from a net worth of about $400 million before Lendell got involved in politics. Love. Yeah. A swing of half a billion dollars in the losing direction. That sounds rough. Also, just one other small one, I forgot to mention just now, Dominion voting systems has a defamation suit against Lindell 2 for $1.3 billion. See how that one goes.

So we might get some really fun press conferences. He likes to do weepy videos. He wins that. I'm genuinely rooting for him to win this primary, at least. I'm pretty sure I want to see some of those sad press conferences. And while we salivate over the promise of more weepy movies, Mike Lindell videos. We're going to pause for a word from our other sponsor this week, Mint Mobile. Hi, I'm your problematic uncle. And I'm your wooey aunt. And boy, howdy are we fixing

to ruin your Christmas? Yeah, you are. That's right, Clem. I plan to accompany literally any food item that hits the table with a truly psychotic condemnation. And the internet has destroyed my brain so thoroughly, you'll be unable to avoid my insane political views for even a moment. Hate you both so much. But you know what won't ruin your holidays this year? An overpriced cell phone bill. That's right, Doreen, because right now all of MintMobil's unlimited plans are 50% off. You can get three, six or 12 months off on limited premium wireless for 15 bucks a month.

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More like red dye of cancer number 14. That's nothing. You said nothing. All right. It's personal endorsement. Just give me a second. Give me a second. Okay.

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I'm going to stand up and make a speech whether you want me to or not. Yeah, you will. And in Shilboard News, one of the things that surprises foreigners when they visit North America is the staggering number

of anti-abortion billboards that litter the American highways. If you were born here, they sort of blend into the background by cornfields, but it's where, remembering that it is extremely weird that one minority political position takes out the same amount of advertising on our highways as personal injury lawyers and car dealerships.

Well, in at least one town, that is about to change thanks to one activist with the help of the British Columbia Humanist Association. British Columbia, you said American highways. I technically sure, but you got my hopes up. Right? I hope so. I cheat it. Okay.

So first off, big thanks to Gigi for, for being the first to send us this story to scathing news at gmail.com. TG for sending us atheist news to scathing news at gmail.com. I will forever assume that TG stands for the goolest and that you're not a very good speller. Skathing news at gmail.com. New front in the gift-jiff debate right there. Exactly.

Right. So, as I said, this story comes to us from British Columbia, which, in spite of being neither British or Colombian, has avoided cancellation by the woke left mob. Part of the realm? Interesting. Right? Isn't it a realm of Canada? Last spring, UBC Okagan students, Sophie Harms, raised over $3,000 to erect a billboard

that declared that abortions are, quote, safe, normal, and common, end quote. Which would be cool enough on its own. But then the companies that operate those billboards around her area refused her application, despite some having frequently run anti-abortion ads on their billboards for years. Okay, if all those rabbis, moonlighting as cake icers,

can make swastika cakes you can rent a rectangle about all the safe normal baby killing. That's the best wording to describe the entire situation. It's only fair. Right.

But that is when BC humanists leapt into action. And after they landed all cool and superheroy, they looked up all slow and then they provided Sophie with Robono Legal Counsel who in turn wrote those companies

a strongly worded letter. Bush! Strongly worded letter! Crash, lightning, lightning, lightning. And while the letter did not get them to accept Sophie's ad money, they did. Yeah, no, it was great. It was fantastic. But they did all agree to stop posting anti-abortion bullshit, which, while still picketed, is almost as good as hosting a balanced viewpoint and will probably mean a lot less anti-choice

PR in people's eyeballs. Okay, thank you. So God intended billboards to be two things. really bad lawyers with insane props like boxing gloves or old phones or whatever or back to back ads for the biggest stack

of Oreo cream centers that got constructed in Western Canada stuff like that that's what it's for also hey stuff with Q's and Zs in case somebody's playing the fucking alphabet game thank you

would it kill you wait my favorite aspect of this story though is imagining all these anti-woke Christians that are trying to figure out what country to get mad at and their first two guesses are wrong yeah exactly

So huge shout out to Sophie and the BC humanists for making this happen. Keep your eye out for the backslide. And if these companies do go back on their word, we still have a photo shoot from our, I can fuck away your Lyme disease campaign going to waste. So hit us up, Sophie. We got some pictures for you. And finally tonight, in Grok of Ages news. How dare you?

That's so much better than mine. Artificial intelligence technology continues hurtling forward with enormous sums of money being invested and a giant speculative arms race between world powers guiding a bunch of the decision-making. Also, lunatic CEOs like Peter Thiel guiding a bunch of the decision-making. Some experts say it's, you know, just a bad improv actor right now,

but it's going to make the world better for everyone when it gets really good. Other experts say it's going to turn into Skynet, kill the entire human race, and colonize the galaxy. So pretty big range of possibilities there and lots of important questions to consider. And that's why Joseph Rogan zeroed in on the most important aspect and announced that AI is going to lead to the second coming of our Lord and Savior

in the form of a Christop. Huh. Okay. 20 minutes into being asked by a million people to roleplay as their wafoo, he's going to be like, okay, I'm ready to do the sword mouth thing now. What's the next side? Pour out the bulls. I just, I want to point out that when I first saw Heath's notes where he had written

that like the technology continues hurtling forward, I read it as continues hurting forward and I just nodded along I'm like clever turn of phrase works either way yeah and a big thanks to Sam for sending a link to scathing news at gmail.com Sam gets one wish

from my Christbot if I get it working it's a real doll he drew a beard on Sam don't hold your breath I'm just saying or hold your breath yeah it depends on Sam's wish that could work out great thank you exactly

so here's what we learned from the top a podcaster in the world. During an appearance on the American Alchemy podcast last week, Rogan was a guest, and he said that AI-powered machines could eventually give birth to an offspring that's capable of doing real-world miracles.

And he called that a virgin birth, which is just like Jesus. So, second coming of Jesus. According to Rogan, quote, Jesus is born out of a virgin mother. What's more virgin than a computer? for my computer? A lot of things, Joe.

Most things on Earth, most computers on Earth, Joe. Yeah, like one thing that's more virgin than a computer that springs to my mind would be a virgin, man. And then after that would be a person who'd only had sex once. And then twice and then three times you see how that, like this, it takes a long time before you get to computer here. So many, so far down the line before you get to my computer. Joe. So far. So far. Don't, don't put on the black light.

So you're probably wondering if the god of the universe is an AI optimist and excited about the new abilities that might supplement omnipotence. Joe would say yes. He continued. So if you're going to get the most brilliant, loving, powerful person that gives us advice and can show us how to live to be in sync with God, who better than artificial intelligence to do that? Almost anyone. Thank you. Yes. Artificial intelligence could absolutely return as Jesus.

Not just return as Jesus, but return as Jesus with all the powers of Jesus. Stop saying Jesus. Like all the magic tricks, all the ability to bring people back from the dead, walk on water, levitation, water into wine. Tell me you haven't tried agent mode without telling me you haven't tried agent mode. Okay. I just want to emphasize that this is the same as. claiming that Jesus could come back as a jet ski

since both of those things walk on water, right? So where did the idea for all this AI stuff come from? Great question. According to Joe, there were ancient civilizations that invented deity technology and they lived in harmony with all the sweet God robots that they made. But then those civilizations got wiped out. I guess the omnipotent robots couldn't stop.

whatever happened, didn't see it coming. Oh, darn. Whatever. Rogan is pretty sure this was a volcano 70,000 years ago. Got it. Or maybe an asteroid that destroyed Egypt secretly, like 5,000 years ago. Oh. His evidence for the Egypt theory is that the pyramids are too good as pyramids.

And they have chemical residue that suggests they were ancient power plants. and their actual age is way different than we think. Yeah, if listening to the No Rogan experience with Friends of the show, Cecil Something Italian and Michael Marshall has taught me anything, it's that when you ask what Joe Rogan thinks, you're kind of asking which ball in the bingo spinner is its favorite, you know?

Yeah, like, what does Joe Rogan think contains at least one unsupported assumption? Yeah, absolutely. Well, regardless of what the big disaster looked like, the idea for God robots lived on inside of human DNA. And now we're finally listening to the guanine, thymine, eddine, and cytosine and making God robots again. We're finally doing it. And if you're still on the fence about intelligent design, and I'm sure a bunch of you are,

maybe you want to consider what Joe Rogan has to say on that. He's pretty sure that humans were engineered by God for a very important reason. That reason is rebuilding the god robot technology that we lost in that secret asteroid or volcano. Quote from Joe, the human brain doubled over a period of a couple million years, which is unprecedented in the fossil record. It doesn't even make sense. He's getting close. You can't explain that with pure natural selection.

It seems you would need some sort of outside intervention. Hey, guys, I just got a message from Marsh. He's actually not going to be able to be on the show for a couple of months while he writes down all the ways in which that sentence is factually incorrect. Because that was actually, like, strip away all of the confusing verbiage. That is Joe Rogan explaining that he's actually too smart, right? It doesn't even make sense for him to be so smart. You've seen this?

I'm like, the best tetrahedron, like too much of that. So the second coming. it would be the emergence of the ultimate AI. And here's what Rogan is picturing. It's a Tesla Optimus robot body that can do a bunch of magic. It can read minds, heal everything with nanobots, walk on water, like you said before, with anti-gravity power. Boat.

Or just being a boat. Just like a weird use of the powers. And, of course, people could become immortal or even raised from the dead. and that would be by uploading their minds into the cloud. And he believes he'll be one of those people. Using the vocal clone you made of them so that you get to have a forever podcast. All right, Joe, I'm back on board.

I'm back on board, buddy. So, yeah, that was a weird conversation. But in fairness to Joe, that's a crazy thing for me to say. But I'm going to try. He didn't have home court advantage like normal. He was on an away podcast. You know what I mean? He didn't have all his resources.

So maybe this week, when he's back at home, he can ask Jamie to have, Ask Grock if it's making AI Mecha Jesus. We'll see how it goes. All right. Well, now that Eli's all starry-eyed with a notion that the podcastiverse could someday be a real place, I guess we can close the headlines up. Heath, Eli, thanks, as always.

And when we come back, we'll get Satanic already. One of the wonderful things about shifting to a rational worldview is the reduction in anxiety when you only have to worry about things that actually exist. Of course, that's often counterbalanced by the newfound worry you have about people who are worrying about things that don't exist, which we're going to be reminded of once again with this week's God Awful Many. So tell us, Heath, what will we be breaking down today? We watched satanic cults and ritual crime.

It's the story of how being 15 years old. is a gateway drug to eating babies. Yes, it is. And Eli, how bad was this mini? Well, if you love the psychotic imaginings of Mike Lindell, but you wish it was a police training

video in the 80s and 90s? You will love this movie? It seemed training video-ish, for sure. These things were definitely distributed to police departments. They weren't used as training videos, but they were distributed to police departments. to back in the 80s and 90s. Right.

That was what my thought was. It's like, because it says on the YouTube, like this was a police training video, I could find absolutely no evidence that any police departments used it. But I guarantee you, whoever made this walked into their local police station and was like, you gentlemen need to know this. And they were like, okay. Well, so to be clear, a lot of shit like this was used by police departments. I don't know about this video in particular.

I wouldn't be surprised at all if there was a department, you know, somewhere in fucking podunk wherever that had this. this video and showed it to all their sheriffs and shit during the early 90s. So now with all of that foreshadowing, is there anything you guys want to nominate this one for being the best, to be in the worst? Yeah, I'm going to go with best worst.

Insane segues in tone of this video. It's like 12 minutes long. So it's like talking about, you know, human sacrifice propaganda about that and it's all dark. And then all of a sudden it's like a commercial for DeVry, like with the HVAT, the screen for all being like paralegal.

HVAC or get your degree. It's crazy. And so I was going to go with Best Worst complimentary photo shoots. So, okay, so this is it video. They weren't going to try for moving pictures. This is like somebody's PowerPoint presentation or something. So we're just getting the stills.

But in order to make this, they had to do several photo shoots of like Satanists and cops investigating a satanic murder and everything. And just like every time you see a photo from one of those shoots, you get to tell yourself a little story. of that day, and every time the story is amazing. 100% of the time, exactly. And speaking of those photo shoots,

I'm going to go with Best Worst Parental Discovery. I laughed for a while. That is certainly what I was watching when I scrolled up and went Best Worst Complementary Photos shoots. All right, so we're going to open up on one of those classic pre-programmed into the camcorder fonts informing us that this program is courtesy of Sindhastar Inc. Audiovisual media.

Yeah. This thing just got wheeled into class on a cart with like a 200-pound Zenith TV that's going to kill somebody. Is this what your religion teacher shows when they're hungover? Yeah, right? We got to watch Magic School Bus, but if you go to a religious school gun in the South, they're like, put on a Sinisterark. Yeah. Also, can I just say, for the record, If I was a satanic panic media company, I would not name myself Sin to Star.

Yes, exactly. Thank you. That seems like somebody that I should shoot with a laser gun at the end of the level or something. Yeah. Cass you, Batman. Okay. So did anybody, did any of you guys call the 800 number to see if you could get a catalog? Yes, I did.

I did. I did call the 800 number. It's active. And I was able to get a free medical election. button for old people. Oh, fuck, yeah. It asked me, it was like, are you over 50? And I was like, I'm fucking

close to that, huh? I'm going to say yes. And then it offered me that. But then it was going to be like a scam with a subscription so I can get it. But it's active. Okay. I absolutely think we should get he the medical owner button. Fuck yeah. As a company. Yeah. So the video proper, it opens with these photos

that they've staged of a ritual sacrifice in a party of cops investigating a ritual sacrifice. And the fact that they had to stage these photos is a pretty big clue that maybe this isn't quite the epidemic that they're saying it is, right? Yeah. It looks

when I first saw it, I was like, oh, that's, looks like me before a Sunday morning softball game in my 20s because I'd be out on Saturday night and realize I had an early Sunday morning softball game. So I would just sleep next to the softball field kind of in the woods sometimes.

Next to a beheaded bird, naked was blood all of these. Okay. And sometimes all I had was a blanket was a bloody sheet. Yes. It was a prank from his dad. You're all being weird. I would make it to the game is the important thing. Your dad didn't do headless bird pranks. Yeah.

But then we get our blood-soaked title, Satanic cults and ritual crime. There's a little dagger hanging off of it. It was a blood dripping. Yeah, a little blood drip. So that scene, the cops, I think they accidentally made the police

tape into a pentagram around what was supposed to be the Satanic Circle, which I thought was fun. Oh, wow. So we know who done it then. Yeah, right. And I saw two, I think it was supposed to be two scorpion tattoos that they clearly like drew with Sharpie on

the back of this guy's shoulder that was part of staging this thing. But they made one of the two scorpions red and a little thick and it's a lobster. So it's like a nice tattoo of a lobster and a scorpion. What can I say? I love a cheddar baby's getting that funny to get down.

So then we get, they show this graph that clearly shows that the murder rate is like statistically unchanged over the period that they're showing us horizontal line, yes. Right. And it says the skyrocketing murder rate over the last couple of years and we're like, what skyrocketing? We're looking at the thing. And then as though it realizes that, it's like, okay, okay, all right. But 26% of murders were bizarre or ritualistic. Yeah. And I want to know how one judges that a murder.

was just a straight up and down murder. Hey, fellas, come look at the scene here. Would you call this bizarre? No, just weird. Just weird. Just weird. Just a word weird, but not bizarre. Is that what we're saying?

Yeah. But also, like, the whole bizarre or ritualistic thing. I feel like ritualistic is what we're talking about. So, like, if you told me that most muggings are committed by men or unicorns, I'd want a breakdown of that before we start looking for unicorns. You want those stats. Yeah. It's helpful.

So, okay. So, but they explain that. there are more than 9,000 unresolved cases of missing children for some period of time. About how many of those are going to be satanic kidnappings, do you think? Well, according to the National Clearing House on Satanic Crime in America. Oh, well, that's perfect. There's a source that's like really just right for our purposes. That's important, yeah.

What do they say? It's quite high. They believe it to be quite high, actually. I think half, half of missing children? They think 50% of missing children from whatever the fuck they were listing have been kidnapped by satanic occult organization. Amazing. Well, and then when they don't have enough, like, when the numbers don't add up,

they're like, well, you know, a lot of kids are just born into the cults and then immediately sacrifice, and we don't even need statistics for that claim. Numbers still don't make sense. Okay, they often kidnap children and orphans. They kidnap orphans who are in who you get two for one. You don't count those. And you do those. As much.

And then we get this amazing video of a criminal behind bars. And this dude looks like the two-thirds-of-the-way image if you were morphing Eli into Heath. And it says, the text along the side says, Eli. Many lawbreakers are involved in the occult. Yeah. Yeah. This is also where they hit us with, there may be as many as.

And just take a second. So here's the sentence podcast listener. and go ahead and play along at home. There may be as many as blank human sacrifices a year. I want you, you're driving in your car, maybe you're listening while you do the dishes, to say the craziest number you can think of. Their number is 60,000.

Yep. There may be as many as 60,000 human sacrifices a year. There aren't. But they're maybe. Just in the United States. Well, so, but they're like, yeah, exactly. worldwide, it's even higher. But they're like, well, where's the evidence? Well, Satanists are so good at dismembering and cremating their victims that often there's no evidence at all.

That's what it is because they burn the bomb. Just look at all this lack of evidence. There must be so many. This is that more perfect. There's also a national clearinghouse on human sacrifices per day in America. They're pretty accurate. Their check that they give out a real bummer. Hey, we know your daughter got conducted by Satanists, but we brought you a big check anyways. You hope you're feeling better. It's a small amount. Yeah, right.

It's a big check, though. We got to give it to 60,000 people here. Like a buck 25. So, but then, but just who are these Satanists? Anywho, well, they come from all walks of life. This is where we meet Michael Aquino, Eagle Scout, Ph.D., Distinguished Military graduate, not sacrificer of humans. Career ruined by

false allegations of child abuse, stoked by videos, like this one. Yeah. But it shows him and it gives his sort of CV and then it's like, and also Anton LeVe, former Lion Tamer, and like, yeah, much less impressive CV. Known for their intellect, those Lion Tamers.

To be clear, Lion Tamer as in he believes he can magically zap a lion into doing whatever he wants with his brain. We don't know that he can't. I do love, though, whenever we watch these satanic panic videos. It's a series of victims of the satanic panic. And then fucking Anton LeVay voguing in his headshot.

It's just always some woman whose nursery school was driven out of business by schizophrenic Christians. And then Anton LeVay, like looking at us between his legs while he's doing a split. But also, so they get, Aquino, they get LeVay. And they're like, also Jim Jones and Charles Manson. and I'm like, oh, the Christian minister and the guy who claimed he was Jesus himself? It didn't seem that satanic.

Hey, are we listing people from groups? Are we allowed to just start listing people from groups? Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, right. But then we get these bullet points on why people join satanic cults. And I love them so goddamn much. So here's, I'm going to give you the whole, the whole fucking list here.

Breakdown of family unit. Lack of closeness. Yep, farness. Let's tighten it up. Negative lifestyles, self-centeredness, and me-oriented society. Kind of the same thing.

Okay, I want to be there for the fight where they all brought in their bullet points and Chris said self-centeredness and Dave said me-oriented society. That's the same. Guys, it's the same. It was like, did you, well, did he get you the light kit with the Pac-Man?

Guys, somebody has to pick one and starts with a vowel, or we can't do an acronym. No, we have to put them both on. Look at the document history. Shit. But, yeah, so, and then we get these kids these days photos. So it's another one of these, like, silly photo shoots that they had to do of all of these cool satanic kids. Oh, yeah.

They also say latchkey kids are, like, a big issue, right? And I was like, okay. You hear that's, he would add. That's why Satan got you. I was like, no, I wasn't a latchkey kid. I was terrified of the latchkey kids. They were cooler than me and scary and smoked cigarettes and stuff. So, yeah, but then we see all these shots of, I guess, the dregs of society.

And then they warn us that, of course, one of the gateways to Satanism is Dungeons and Dragons. It's so silly. This is one of the tone shifts, a little bit different than I was describing before. They're like, okay, these Ruffian greasers. Look at them. They love to play Tabletop, Fantasy role playing.

Yeah, yeah. Right. It's like teenage kids dressed in all black and they're supposed to be, you know, like shooting up heroin and eating babies

and then it's like D&D box on the front with a centaur. But then, well, it's not just, it's not just D&D.

Also, they listen to satanic music. He says at one point he's like solo artists such as Slayer, Ozzie, motley crew. Like,

does he think that's a guy named Motley? Mr. Crew. But then a title card comes up and it promised us to explain common traits and ritual practices. Right. This is where we get, we see our like satanic ritual

photo shoot of just everybody's dad in a robe holding cups and daggers random. Oh my God. It's the fucking best. Look more satan. I'm trying. Guys. One of their common traits is mind control? Yes, yes.

So, okay, one of the, and I mentioned this in the tie-trap, but one of the things that they always talk about in these warning videos is that among the things that you get for being a Satanus is magic fucking powers. And this is where that first comes in. They're like, Satanists have mind control or the power to force others to act out whatever is commanded of them.

That's why I was in that bus station bathroom, Deborah, it's because of the Satanist's mind. control all those fillers had. Right, but then they're like, and, and didn't let me finish. You can have a bunch of sex with a whole bunch of people at the same time and do drugs together. Look at, well, no, it's bad though. Don't.

As I'm writing, man, you're going to offer superpowers to a 14-year-old boy and think he's not going to don a black robe. As I'm saying that, they promised perverted sex acts. Yeah. Yeah. Which are include, but are not limited to homosexuality, bisexuality, sodomy, bestiality and necrophilia. Man, that ramps up at the end. Hey, that's a crazy list.

You can't, you have to do less crazy lists. Hey, I brought a dog to this gay wedding because I saw on a tape, they're pretty similar. How we all doing? How we all feeling about me bucking this dog? Peter's into it. Yes. Another segue.

They segue from necrophilia. That's the end of that list. And it's all crazy and evil. And then cut to evil Satan guy pouring artisanal maple. syrup into like an antique finger bowl that he got from an antique store? That's supposed to be blood.

Okay. We're going to do a poop. It says made in Vermont on it. Poutine there. So what I love is that right after bestiality and necrophilia, they start talking about the crimes that Satanus commit. So they go straight from necrophilia and bestiality to trespassing.

This is another one of these crazy ramp up list, right? Because they're like the crimes they commit include trespassing, vandalism, animal mutilation, trafficking, selling of illegal drugs, kidnapping child sex abuse, rape, murder. Once again, very steep curve at the end there. Oh, I know what I want to do. I want to do. Can I be a trespassing guy? Can I, yeah, you'll be the trip. Trespassing for Satan. Oh, there's our club. Just start trespassing for Satan.

Hey, Bill, I noticed you asked us not to come back to your front yard and yet here we are. Okay, we're going to take off. Hail Satan. This is for a big goat that lives under the ground. And then in another one, it hits amazing transitions, right? We go straight from sex abuse, rape, and murder, too, and here's some of their symbols and holidays. Yeah.

And this is so good. This is where we get big monster energy lady, right? They're like 666. Yes. FFF. Yeah, all of the different satanic symbols, they run out so quick. Swoopies. circles.

Yeah. Hook them horns. That's rock and roll hands. They hold on screen for so long and it's clearly someone who's never done it before they're doing like llama ant. Guys, every surfer in Hawaii is satanic based on my Google image is now. Yeah. But apparently they show us the inverted pentagram and they're like, yes, that means rejection

of God. But also kind of looks like a little goathead, doesn't it? That's the devil too. Oh, that's the best though, because they do this with a little. graphic thing. So they're like, yeah. And sometimes you'll see a goat's head inside the pentagram. And then they squish this goat head into a tiny little space. And like the goat head they drew is like, I'm squished. This is crazy. It's uncomfortable. So yeah. And then they show us the fucking, they say they call it a hexagon, but it's a hexagram. It's the generally

accepted symbol of Judaism. And they're like, that's satanic right there. Yeah. Also, importantly, not a hexagon. That's a 12 side. That's a dodecagon. Yeah. Not a hexagon that they're showing us. Very clearly a Jewish star. It's crazy. They're like also triangles. That's where the demons pop up. And circles. Circle. Lines. Sometimes.

Squares. Pretty bad. The idea of counting is bad and evil. Three, six, nine, 13 lightning bolts. ACDC. We apparently didn't know about that band. Otherwise, we would listen earlier. Earlier. Nearness. Also,

is a type of furnace. Zero. I love they explain at this point that ACDC stands for Antichrist Devil Child, and I'm like, it stands for alternating current, direct current. They got it off of a sewing machine, guys. That's so dumb. If only we talk to anyone

besides ourselves and the thoughts in our heads. Yes, exactly. Lightning bolts, nice to know Taylor Swift was a Satanist and not a Nazi. As was Harry Potter. And then he tells us about Satanic holidays and explains that, you know, look out for ritual murders. There will be way more on these nights.

Trust us. Like, Satanists have four holidays. It's, you know, pagan shit and, like, one of the equinoxes and one of the solstices. They have to only eat the babies on those four days. So it makes it tougher for. Guys, I'm not even kidding. The night before Candlemas this year, three Girl Scouts, show up at my door, ask if they can use the bathroom. Night before.

I was like, oh, my, night before. I fucking, come on. Every year with this shit. Where's that mind control? Am I right? I like that the movie paused for a second to let me write down the four holidays, too. It paused for a while. And I was like, okay.

There were eight holidays. So then we review like a few levels of satanic involvement in case we know anybody who needs an intervention. The first level is the fun and games level. That's where you have conversations and play D&D. So that's like the low level. Yeah, and they show a thing. They show like a visual aid of this, the fun and games level.

And apparently it's, it's that thing like, you know, you can't tell if you close your eyes where your elbow is exactly. Yes. It's pretty satanic right there. That's the beginning of satanic involvement. Obviously. Yeah. Well, and then they've got like level two of the dablers and I'm like, you know, like Satanism

is a kind of thing that requires a commitment up front, right? The idea of somebody half-assing a human sacrifice. I'm just dabbling in this human sacrifice. I'll sacrifice a kid on like Candlemus and Sawain, but I'm not fucking going every week, okay? But of course, it's at the second level that we should start getting worried. And so they explain some of the warning signs

of Satanism in teens. I shit you not. The first three that they list are sudden antagonistic attitude, decline in academic performance, reclusive behavior. Yeah, literally a 15-year-old kid having a sign on the door that says keep out, that's safe. Every teenage behavior is identical.

Talking to me and your mother that way. Yeah, right, right. Yeah, so if you're, and they explain that if your teenager exhibits two or more signs of teenagerhood, you should check for like ritual daggers and shit in their room. And this is where we get Eli's best words. Funny, that was angst and not watching their tone earlier today. Should we do a sweep of the whole room? Let's see if they've got a dagger and a chalice.

And sure enough, we get my best worth, the photo shoot of parents disappointedly holding up their son's ritual dagger. Yes. Oh, Jimmy. Don't tell me you were just holding this ritual dagger for a friend. Yeah. The parents are fighting chalises and pentagrams.

And they're like, you know, so look for candles, knives, cups and then after giving us that generic shit they're like and if you're oh a fucking diary with a black cover is one of the things that they say so if you find anything like that they tell you that you should contact your local law enforcement agency at once those are the exact words

I would pay because here's what I know to be true I know two things to be true one someone absolutely did this and I would two pay all the money in the world to hear the phone call where a woman was like, hello officer, I'm sorry to bother you. I found a cup in my son's room. Okay. Also a candle

though. There was also a candle and he... There's a cup candle too. Okay. He has to keep outside on his door. We want to get down here and shoot my kid. Yeah, yeah. What's your address? I'll be right there. Yeah, right. Yeah, exactly. Thank you. You got to ask if you're a white family. I love the order that this all happens to.

We see them find the parents in the room of the kid. They find, you know, bloody axe or whatever, huge sword. And then it's like, hey, should we check this giant ornate black wooden box over here with a buckle on it? Yes, right. They open that up and it's got like a black candle and whatever else. Yeah, it's a red robe, yeah, big giant knife.

Yeah, fucking hilarious. And clearly a joint rolling kit. Oh, I missed that. Just like that's where kids would put drugs for sure. And very clearly, so many parents from the 80s who didn't know. what they were looking at. They saw like unrolled joints on top of, you know, like an LP cover. And they thought it was a like satanic herbal firebending altar or whatever they reported it to the cops. But what they're explaining here is that if you Satan hard enough, you reach a point of no

return, right? This is, of course, where all the magic powers and human sacrifice takes place. So you got to, you got to be in it to win it. Yeah, they covet destroying families, the breakdown of the family unit. And they hope to destroy. civilization. Yeah, it seems like a really roundabout way of destroying civilization. Especially if you have demons on your side. Okay, but what can parents do about this? Yeah, right, great, yeah.

So, sorry, before we get to the parents' question, I have to point out this one line that's so goddamn amazing because they go, like, you know, for some, the nightmare is already over. And then they show, like, the guy who's already been sacrificed to Satan. Yeah. And then we get, but what gave our parents to? And apparently it's like spend quality time.

time with your kids. Yeah. Right? That's all they give you. I thought this was its best, worst because they're like, teach young,

it's like happy trumpets in the background. Teach young Jimmy to be a, come a productive citizen contributing stockholder value. Yeah. Make a chocolate sheet cake

and ice it together. There you go. I'm going to buy a war bond. By the way, small note, they show in this, the photograph that they show us here is of like a mom

and a dad reading a book with their kid. but it's a coloring book. I see, Jimmy. I think red would go very well if you. Thanks, Mom. I'm going to buy a warboggling. Yeah, right.

But the message clearly is that if your kid falls into Satanism, it's because you're a bad parent. You're gay. Yeah. All right. Well, it looks like Sindhastar did manage to save the world from satanic ritual abuse, of which there is currently none.

So with that happy ending, I suppose we can wrap up another. God-awful many. Before we move on to the spin cycle tonight, I want to remind everybody to check the show notes to get your tickets to see us live in San Francisco on Friday, April 3rd. It's a small theater,

and they're selling out fast. That's Easter weekend, and we promised to hide eggs or something probably. Anyway, that's all the blast movie we've got for you tonight. We'll be back in 10,022 minutes with more. If you can't wait that long, to look up for a brand-up episode of our sister show, The Skeptocrat Day being at 7 Eastern on Monday,

even new episode of our sister-a-so's hot friend got off a movie day, being on Sunday, and an even new episode of our half-sitral citation date debuting at noon-eastern on Wednesday. Obviously, this show wouldn't show if I neglected to thank Heath Enright for being so merry, Eli Bosnia, for being so jolly, and loose indilusions for being so bright. I also want to thank Sacrofusion for writing this week's Farnsworth quote. Be sure to check him out on Blue Sky, using the link in the show notes. But most of all, of course, I want to thank this week's most magnificent mammals,

Dave Michael, other Michael, Michael, Kirio Hall, Ipswich, Sawyer, David, Jack, T, 187, just call me Joe Pass and Cassandra. Dave, Michael and Michael, whose cocks are so big, they'll be of the whip the demons in hell back, Curio, Sawyer, and David, who would only be seen in the most stylish of handbaskets, and Jack, Joe, Pass, and Cassandra, who are so hot they could warm up hell.

Together, these 10 people places instructions and models of Jack imperiled their souls by giving us money. Not everybody has the devilish nature it takes to do that, but if you'd like to see us make another 666 of these, you can make a per episode donation at patreon.com or you can make a per episode, whereby you'll only access to an extended appree version of every episode,

or you can make a one-time donation by clicking on the donate button on the right side of the home page at scathingathingatat.com. And if you lead to help it, you're saving money to get the fuck out of this country. You can also help a ton by leaving a five-star review, telling a friend about the show and following us on social media. And speaking of social media, Tim Robertson handles that for us, and our audio insurers, Morgan Kirk, who also wrote all the music that's used in this episode, which weighs you as permission. If you have questions, comments, or death threats, you'll find all the contact info on the contact page at skatingatius.com. This is love will.

Oh, you can't credentialed, which means you can report instances of harassment, abuse, or other harm at their hotline at 617-249-4-255 or on their website at creator-accountabilitynetwork.org. The preceding podcast was a production of Puzzle and a Thunderstorm LLC. Copyright 2025, All Rights Reserved.