The Shane Dawson Podcast - Costco Conspiracy Theories and WE MOVED!

Episode Date: August 10, 2025

SKIP TO COSTCO THEORIES 58:41 In this episode we dive deep into the theories about Americas favorite warehouse!! We also fall down a rabbit hole about one of the craziest rollercoasters in the world! SQUARESPACE!!! Head to https://www.squarespace.com/GROWER to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code GROWER ROCKET MONEY!!! Try Rocket Money for free or unlock more features with premium: https://RocketMoney.com/grower Sponsor The Shane Dawson Podcast: https://public.liveread.io/media-kit/the-shane-dawson-podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Okay, first of all, I saw so many reels of this, people going to Costco and comparing and they're like, it's the same. It looks the same. It looks the same. It literally is like the same thing, but you can get it for $10 versus $120. Wow. So they basically like, it's almost like the mafia like musseling people into their own brand. But, but they get free samples.

And that should be. And the hot dogs are cheap. Hey, welcome back to whatever the hell is, our new home edition. I am freaking out. This is crazy. I cannot believe it's finally happening. How are we feeling? Okay, before I get into that, don't judge us too much.

This is a work in progress, just like I see in therapy. Aren't we all? So, as you might see, Jared, he has a trash can pretending it's a piece of furniture. But it looks good. That's the idea. You know what I mean? Well, we'll leave it. up to you guys to catch the metaphorical value in that it means more than what catches the eye for sure uh

obviously chris we have uh his pig sitting on top of just like a box so we're going to get chris maybe a bookshelf something cute back there riland i feel like rylind's angle is the cutest you look like you're in church thank you i actually really love the fake stained glass behind me what do you mean we're in a church oh yeah we reinstalled this it was lots of money very expensive It's definitely not peel and stick. No, not at all. Chris, how are you feeling? This is very exciting.

You and Spencer, you guys were here today setting up. How was the vibe? Did it feel different than the vibe at our house? Less crazy? It feels amazing in every possible way. Like, it's so comfy, cozy here. Like, when you say office, I imagine like cold. I imagine like work environment.

This feels still really cozy. No carins. No carins. Super cozy. I have the comfiest chair in the world. You look like a like a, like a, kindergarten teacher doing like story time which is your vibe it must be nice for your ass to not be sitting on a slab of that's true yeah he liked keeping his butt um ready strong it's used to the

rough and ready um but no now that i felt this i can't go back this is i mean we could get a piece of marble and just put it on top of the chair for you did and i have a color a colored light back here yes shout out purple i feel like purple is your vibe And I have a perfect shirt, which is this is one of the, like, earlier shirts that you gave me for the podcast. Okay. My other plan, not to get too sentimental and nostalgic, but I am in cancer and it is cancer season as we're filming this. Oh, no. Oh, no. Yay.

Yes. So I wanted to kind of throw it back a little. I wanted to throw it back a little bit. And so, Chris, you're wearing one of the first shirts that I ever bought you for this podcast, what, three years ago now. Shout out. Shout out, buddy. Tea, body tea. I just learned what that means, by the way.

I was at Airwant, and I was feeling really bad about myself. And this girl walked up to me, she's like, are you Shane? I was like, yeah. And then she goes, body tea. And I said, on period, and she goes point blank. And I was like, and that's that. She goes, that part. And I was like, which part?

And she goes, the whole tea. And I said, okay. Did you say what body on tea stands for? I mean, I feel like you said a barrage of things I didn't get. No, body tea. So like, okay. It just means the body's serving. So like brain, period, on point, body, tea, always.

I just feel like have you ever seen that meme where it's like just math equations going around the guy's head, like, what, what, what. I was going to say Rylan's explanation didn't make it any more clear. Well, Shane's explanation is just saying it over again. No, buddy, it's like body tea. No, the tea is, you know, the tea, right? When your body is the tea, that's like the ultimate. So you're serving. Everything's working right.

Okay. Okay. Thank you. I'm serving body and it's tea. Oh, thank you. On period. What if people don't like tea? Who doesn't like tea? I mean, it upsets some people's tummies. Oh, Ryan, you're definitely being boomer-coded right now.

And that's where I belong. Okay. What were you talking about? Oh, Jared, you're wearing an outfit that's very reminiscent of one of the first outfits you wore on the podcast. It is? Yeah, I will say the first shirt I wore on this podcast. I wore so much it's now see-through. Wait, and I was kind of like, I saw what you asked, you know, you wanted Chris to wear that. I was like, I kind of hope he doesn't ask me to wear that because you'll just see my nipples and everything.

Is this your wardrobe or Shane? I'm sorry. This is not mine. And let's get to Spencer because there's a lot going on right now. Number one, look at your, you have a whole couch. You can't see the whole thing right now. Nice. But it's a little love seat moment for you and whoever the guest is.

For me and my absence lover. Oh, we'll find one. Oh my God, we can. We could do another dating show because now that we're in office. It's not our house. so it's like less weird. Yeah. I did just meet a girl at a truck show in Bakersfield,

cute little Latino girl who's asking if there would be a season two because she wanted to date Spencer. Get her number. There's lots of employees for him at the moment. And ladies. Okay, I totally see you with a Latina girl. Oh. Do you know what I mean?

I see it. Latinas love redheads. Mary fools rush in. Oh my God, you are Chandler Bing. Yeah. We're talking a different language. You need a Selma Hayak period on body team. You need.

You need a Latina to keep you in check, who's spicy and who you're, and you're just like, okay, babe, you know what I mean? Honestly, yeah, I'm kind of down. That's everything. Get my life in order. Also, Spencer is currently wearing a shirt that I bought for Chris, actually. Is it Animal Crossing? Is it? You are serving Tom Nook tea.

It looks like you've been wearing that shirt since the fourth grade. I know. I was going to say, it's a throwback to when I was shorter. And you used to do, like, safari tours. Some of us still are short. That's maybe when I peaked was in fourth grade. Actually, no, I talked about it more. My fourth grade teacher was really mean to me.

Oh, no. What's your name was Mrs. Forst. Remember, she told my mom I would never amount to anything. What? Look at me now, Mrs. Force. Yeah, fuck you, Mrs. What's her name? Force. I know, I know.

If you're going to have a bitchy-ass teacher, Mrs. Force is an iconic name. Send her a link. She's probably. Was she that old? I mean, when you're in fourth grade, you like someone, I was like, she's an old. Even the 30-year-olds were so old. Yeah, exactly. Like, yeah.

Isn't that scary? All of my teachers that when I was little, I felt like we're so old are younger than I am now. And now they're all like old. I know. We are the old people on the dating show. Yeah, we're the old people now. Like when you watch like Love Island or something and it's like, this old fuck walks into the villa. Like that's us.

We're the old fuck. I mean, not Spencer yet. Oh, not you yet. He's a decade younger. I'll never get old. I mean, yeah, you're always in fourth grade. Yeah, right. Okay, also another big update, well, besides the fact that...

Well, do you guys like it? Do you guys like it? I've just settled right in. It feels very homey. It also feels much more intimate because we are in proximity much closer to each other now. I'm really close. You can't yawn anymore because I'll catch... I mean, I can't.

Okay, we have so much that we need to do. So we need to, like, decorate obviously. This is very like... Minimal. I was going to decorate all week, but I got this crazy multiple viruses going on. Don't worry, not contagious. But I have... had a doctor come over. She tested me for everything and then put me on antibiotics. And then a few

days later, I still felt horrible. Worse than before. Worse. And antibiotics, fuck with me. They ruin my face. So, guys, we need to be on dry skin alert. Dry skin alert. He's not serving skin tea. No. So the doctor calls and she's like, um, sis. And I was like, hey girl, what's tea? And then she goes, well, actually, your test results did come back. And you have, and she named two crazy bacterias I'd never heard of. And of course, as she's talking, I'm on chat EBT, which I shouldn't be, but chat GV bodies tea. And I'm like, what are these bacterias? And it's like commonly found in tropical areas or swamps. And I was like, huh? So then I was like, what is this? And then she goes, oh, no, it's super normal. It's just like an infection. You're not contagious. Don't worry about it,

but you need different antibiotics that are stronger. And I was like, perfect. So now I'm on those and some of the common side effects that you guys can look at for. Skin falling off. Okay. Body, body, naughty. Pooping black liquid. Honestly, not to get gross. Have you seen better? It's already gross.

Okay. Venom. Thank you. When I go to the bathroom, he's like, and I'm like, oh my God, venom. Where did you come from? He's like, I've been here. Anyway, so yeah, shitting my brains out.

And number three, intense rage. So this one's been really fun. You know, just like little moments that usually would. not bother me at all. Throw me into a full on rage where I want to throw things at the walls and slice my own head off. How does it feel to be me?

Can we just get in? Can we wake that up? Okay, so, well, also, side note, shout out to everybody that signed up for Patreon. Literally this whole new setup, this new office, everything is because of you guys. Thank you so much. I promise we're not going to talk about it a million times.

You can check it out if you want. No pressure. But thank you. We're so, so grateful. This is life changing. Ah! Thank you. Okay.

So, yes, the other day, me and Rylan were, I don't know, we were having a fight, but I think it was just, it was ramped up because of my antibiotics. And then I don't even remember what it was about. But then afterward, I told Rylan, I was like, you need to work on your temper. And he was like, what temper? And I was like, okay. That one, sweetie. So, yeah, you do, I would say you have a pretty intense temper.

Oh, depending on the day. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, was it this time? No, it depends on circumstances and the day. Right. Lately, I've been very overwhelmed, and when I'm very overwhelmed, then I have a shorter fuse. Well, okay, here's the thing. We were driving over here, which is also fun, because now I'm driving. Which, thank God.

Yeah, I, I, like, messed up my knee, and then I've been, like, forcing Shane to drive because it's the knee that I drive with. I've been driving because I'm excited to drive to the office. Exactly. I have my routine. I get in my car. Turn on my music. I have my keys.

I have my Stanley next to me. I have my sunglasses. I'm, like, making eye contact. I'm, like, saying hi to people on the road. And then Riley, he's sitting next to me. Ryan, by the way, has the worst road rage of any human I've ever seen in my life. It's actually, he is riding every single person's ass so hard. And then the second somebody gets a little close to him, he stops.

And like, he turns on his hazards and he's just like, fuck, yeah. You really do that? Yes. He did it one day. I did it once. But I didn't turn on my hazards. But here's what I will say. We were driving today.

I'm driving. We're having fun. We get behind this bus. I'm a passenger princess. He's a passenger, right? There's a bus in front of us. and it's going very slow. And Shane's like, of course.

No, I literally, I let it happen for like 10 minutes. And I found it was like, oh my God, of course I get behind this bus. I'm not mad at all. And then you said, wow, if I was you right now, I'd be raging out. And he goes, but I'm so calm as a passenger. I am. He goes, and then I said, let's unpack that. And I was like, maybe your rage is lessened when you just let go of control.

Because you are a passenger today, right? Brain on teeth. Well, it's a lot more relaxed when you're not the one driving. Like, I don't care. because I'm not driving. Well, what I'm saying is in life, if you give up a little bit of control, maybe you won't have so much rage. Period. Okay, well, think I'll see it.

The more you know, is this something? Okay, I've never seen it. Drag queens do this because they can't, because this will hurt their nails, I guess. What? So they do. Very golferesque. Golfers do that, the golf lap. Yes.

Who would think? Golfers and drag queens. Yeah, that's a Venn diagram of two circles like over here. Right. What I will say is this is fun. and I feel like for the next episode, we can bring in a new segment that I would like to call Rylen's Rage.

So you can talk about things that are enragedy's week. Yeah. Hmm. Okay. So, Jared, we need to talk. Okay. Okay. So something really crazy happened on your 40th birthday. Can we talk about it?

Let's do it. Okay. So, well, first of all, we went to, for your birthday, we went to this place that had like a ropes course. Yes. It's a campsite. And what they do is they have youth groups come in

and they do this rope course. Very cool campsite. with a few things, but it's very tall, very terrifying. It looks like a final destination, death trap. It's so high up, and it's made of, like, ropes and string and wood. And you got to, like, walk across, like, a Mario Brothers fucking thing where, like, you could die, but I guess you're hooked into something. You are hooked into something, but I still feel like it's very dangerous.

I've seen people fail on bungeys. I'm just saying, I don't trust it. It's crazy. So we get there, and the guy that's working there was a character. Oh, yeah. He had a microphone. Like this? Yes. A pop star.

And we were listening to him through a speaker. So, yeah, we were there. And then Jared was just like, hey, it's my birthday. Like, can I do it? And he was like, oh, I have a party coming in. But do you want to like do a little test run. So that Jared, well, you tell it. So I asked him if I could do this rope course, but he let me know that they only allow people to do it if they have a group that is actually going to go through the whole thing of like 20 kids or whatnot.

But he said, if you want to try it, why don't you go ahead and challenge yourself to see if you could do it by climbing up this entry level. level of rope ladder situation and I'm definitely afraid of heights so I start climbing up this thing and probably 10 feet above the ground I'm already feeling very sketched out you're so close but he wants me to climb all the way up and touch the wood and as I'm about 80% there this guy just starts fucking spraying me with a hose like I'm a dog or something laughing at me yeah and I touch I I I extend as far as I can to touch the wood because first I thought he wants me to stand on this wood,

which I ain't going to fucking do. So I get up there, I touch the wood, and then climbing down, I got stuck a little bit. It was scary. It was scary. I got to be honest. I thought I made it to 40. Thank God.

And that's it for me. He was getting a real kick out of it, too. He goes, if you get up there successfully, you can do the whole thing for free right now. Yeah, I was over it. I didn't even want to do it after that. Honestly, he was just started spraying you with a hose? What the fuck?

He's a big character. I think they do that to the kids On hot summer days But like out of context It's crazy to just do to a guy But it was a fun time I will say I thought before climbing up the rope I could probably do that

Because when you look up It's hard to put in perspective Exactly how tall this thing is But then once I climbed up And that was only 25% of the way The next time I looked up It's like that shit's so high I can never do that you know

So I won't be doing the rope's course No I would say it was the equivalent Of a three story building Five story building Five Five story stories building. Holy shit. I'm sorry that

happened. No, it was fun. Yeah, happy birthday, Jared. This is 40. Yes. I already went through like the existential crisis of turning 40 months ago so I was prepared for it. Yeah, see, I did ask Jared. I was like, do you feel any different? He's like, no, I've already processed this. Well, I think we were

talking earlier, like, when you watch people on TV or something like that, you realize you're the old guy. All it takes for me is to watch sports and realize I'm older than all of these people. They're all like 19. You'll hear someone say wow he's 36 and he's still playing what an old legend and it's like I'm older than that dude you know but you know what 40 is the new 30 I agree for some people somebody said something not to

like it's so sad about age do it Spencer oh you're just so lucky um okay so the other day I saw this like meme or something and it was like the way that people react to that uh dochi song that you know it starts like you think it's someone that I used to know yes but then it's her song and everybody's like, oh, fuck, or whatever. Yeah. So somebody said, that's the way that, the way that Gen Z is annoyed by that

is the way millennials and Gen X used to get annoyed by hearing what they thought was, do, but then it turns into like vanilla ice or something. I was like, wow, we're fucking old. The craziest thing is now is that looking back to like the music that came out in, let's say, 1995, that is now classic rock. Oh, my God.

When it was 1995, if you went back the same amount of time, it's like when the Beatles fucking first debut, I know. First debut. I know. It's crazy shit. Okay, I've already said this before on the podcast, but it's worth repeating. The way that kids watch Mean Girls now is the way that we watch The Breakfast Club.

Wow. This is hurting my feelings. Right? Well, this is insane. Okay, I wasn't going to talk about this until later in the show during the rabbit hole section, but I saw this real and I spiraled about this. Just check this out.

Right, biggest question I get is where these doors go and my new place. So you can actually open these doors. We're not supposed to because they're helping safety stuff, but you can't open it. What? When you move into a place like this high, basically you get to give them parachutes. So if anything happens, you have to open one of them doors and just send it. What? Fucking what?

I need him to open it all the way. I don't believe that that just opens. Okay. You know how they give you like fire extinguishers? you know, in every apartment. They give you parachutes because you're so high up that you're fucked and it's like jump. I guess it is smart. This actually reminds me, did you know in Las Vegas they have netting all around the buildings?

Oh, yeah. Because people gamble everything they got and they're like, fuck this and they want to jump off of the building. So they have netting to catch them. You also, I don't think you can open, there's balconies, but most of the windows you can't open at all because of the same thing. Yeah. Okay. She took a turn. Okay, Jared's birthday?

Okay, I'm 40, I'm 40, okay. Okay. Hey, what's up you guys? Sorry to interrupt this episode. I know, first of all, we're in a new location. What's happening? I'm going to be very honest. I am not feeling good.

I have a collection of viruses. I don't know. Maybe we talked about it in this episode. I don't remember the brain fog. Has anything changed in this kitchen since the last time we were here? Let me look. My pills. That's for my virus.

I guess that's it. Oh, and I have kids now. So that's what all those things are. Although I will say, this is very handy. They should make it in adult sizes. Oh, my God, for pistachios. All right, what am I doing? That's right.

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about who's coming on. Squarespace has everything you need to get your site going and to make it look beautiful. So check it out, make your own site. Go to Squarespace.com slash grower. Get a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use offer code grower to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. I love Squarespace. They're so easy to use and they will make your website look amazing. See you guys later. Bye. This is a true story. It happened right here in my town. One night, 17 kids woke up, got out of bed,

walked into the dark, and they never came back. I'm the director of Barbarian. A lot of people die in a lot of weird ways. You're not going to find it in the news because the police covered everything all up. On August days. This is where the story really starts. Weapons. Okay, guys, should we do the game?

What game? Well, we have a game. We can try the game. Is it a new game for the new space? Well, it's one of the games we played very early on in the podcast that we, for some reason, never played again. But I feel like we should bring it back in our new space. Guys, we're going to play a little game called Majority Rules. Oh, wow, it's such a throwback.

I don't even remember. We played it on Big Brother episodes. So, Spencer, do you want to refresh our memories? All right. Let's take a trip down memory lane. So this is game. It's called Majority Rules. It's pretty simple.

We have a statement sort of like, this person blank. This person, this person is most likely to pee their pants, something like that. Okay. Attacked. And there's two of us here. Come on. It's genetic. Well, that would be an interesting one, actually. And then so ever, we're all going to write a name someone we think it is.

And then the people in the majority, so the people who have the same answer, the majority answer get a point. So you're trying to think what everyone else is thinking. So it's not an attack. Okay. Who the Majority thinks. They play this on Drag Race a lot. Perfect. It gets messy.

It does get messy. You guys ready? Oh my God, not with my rage. Yes. Okay, the first one, it's most likely to overshare on the podcast and regret it instantly. Oh, and regret it. And regret it.

It's a tough one. Okay. Ready? Three, two, one. Chris. Chris. Oh, majority. Fuck.

We all got a point. I blanked. No, I didn't get a point. I blanked because I just flashed back to when I did. told about shitting my pants and people have brought that up to me. Really? Yeah, and I was like, what the fuck did I say that? That's relatable. Chris is very interesting because he'll say something on the show

and then it's not even a thing, right? Like, I wasn't in the moment like, wow, I can't believe he said that. And then later he'll be like, hey, can you take out that moment of me saying, I like tuna or something like that? I'll be like, sure he's like, okay, Chris. But then he won't tell me to take out some of the craziest shit you've ever said on this show that I'm like, do you want me to

take that out? And you're like, no. I'm like, okay. It is weird little specific things that I just overthink about spiral about for something. I know. I'm sorry. No, it's fine. You're doing it right now. It's okay. I won't ask you to get it out. Second question or second statement. The most likely to join a pyramid scheme just to see how far it goes. Oh, that's so easy. Yeah, I got my answer. All right, ready. Three, two, one, flip. Me?

Yeah. Yeah. Universal. Majority. Most likely to join would be you, but then just to see. Yeah. Wait. I got to see this thing through. Well, Jared. Well, Jerry. Okay, my theory on that is that, Jared, you would do that just because it's funny. Yes. It's entertaining. Yes. And you'd see how far in you could get. I've gone to several Pyramid scheme or MLM meetings that people have invited me to.

Not recently, but they're very fun. You know? I feel like Chris would like, he would do it. And he would, like, he'd literally come to us and be like, guys, I'm selling leggings. And it'd be like, oh, no, not all the room. But because you can't see the bad in people. So you'd be like, no. They would never try to scam us.

The quality's great. Yeah, right, right? The quality's perfect. That's true. Are you guys ready for the next one? Yes. I think this might be another consensus one. Let's see.

Most likely to spend $500 on useless TikTok gadgets. Ooh. Well, come on. I don't know who to put it. Okay, I'm trying to think who the majority's going to say. Okay, who dresses this podcast and where do you think they get close? You sold me. You are such a, okay.

You sold me. I'm only writing this for majority. already, ready three, two, one. Fuck, all of shame. I bought, outside of filming a video, I've only bought two Instagram ads ever, and

they always, fuck me. And they're not dildos. No. So it's crazy that they're fucking me, right? You can buy dildos on TikTok? Oh, yeah, I'm sure. Are you kidding? Come on. Half of the shop.

Yeah, remember you could buy, like, you used to be able to buy Osempic on the TikTok shop. Yeah, okay. Next one. Most likely to have a secret Instagram account. A finston? I know who this is. I'm actually kind of stumped.

Well, then you're saying it's me? I don't know. Okay, I go on. Ready? Three, two, one, reveal. I put Chris. Wait, is there no majority? No, it's there.

We're the majority. We win. You literally have one. I created one for a very specific reason. And I've only ever, you're always on. that one. No, I'm not. I mean, you're not leaving hate comments on that one, but every time I look over, you're like, well, let me log into my fake one. Well, I said Spencer, because now that he's hyper aware that a larger audience is aware of his likes, he needs to go somewhere to really

be himself. That's where I can like normal stuff. I, okay, here's it. I don't have one. And that's because I don't just, all I really care about on Instagram, and shout out if I'm following you, and I do engage and I, you know, whatever, but all I really care about is Big Brother. Like, that's it. You know what I mean? So I don't really need a fake one because I could just look at Big Brother. Yeah, we don't really utilize. I don't understand the close friends thing. Am I? Do you guys have any, does anybody here have a close friends thing? What the hell is that? You have one? I have one. Oh, wow, we haven't made either of their list. I think you're on it. I never post on it. I never post on my neither, but I think they're on it. Okay. Now they're backtracking. Thank you.

No, we never used our close friends. I'll pull it up right now. I don't understand what is the point of it? I don't really know, but shout out if you may be a close friend. The reason I did it originally when I was younger is because my parents followed me on Instagram. So if I posted something like me drinking or something like that yeah that's what i'm crazy isn't it crazy that he can tell it when i was a kid's story with instagram that is not i didn't even think that right you guys are so old he's like when i was four on my on my ticot okay i didn't have a phone until ninth grade wow your parents held up for a long time that's like when i went to yeah i wasn't about to watch tv so you know when i went to dizzling recently and i was talking to someone in line and

we were talking about star wars and i was like oh yeah i remember seeing the prequels and theaters, and he was like, you were alive when those came out? And it really ruined my day. When did they come out? Like 2000? Yeah. That's not that. That's funny.

Okay. Spencer was like one. He's like, that's not one. I know, but I guess I was alive. So I'll tell you in that camp. Brown's in the lead by one. The rest of us are tied. All right.

Next one. Most likely to ghost their therapist. Oh. Ooh. That's hard. Ooh. It's hard. Hmm.

Well, you'd have to. Have one. Yeah. Doesn't that exclude most people here? Yeah, you'd have to have one. Let me get rid of my exclamation point. I didn't mean it aggressive. I don't know.

I don't feel good about my answer. All right, everyone got one? Yeah. All right. Three, two, one. I'll feel. I put Ryland. What?

Yes, I think I won. Damn it. Yes. Okay, you, okay. Listen, I'm pretty responsive and good. I wouldn't miss an appointment, but I would kind of just like never schedule another one. That's what I thought.

Oh. Well, I put Spencer because you did. I literally did this. Oh. Yeah, my therapist had a baby and then was like, hey, I'm back. And I just, oh, whoa. I was looking for a way to get out of it anyways. So it was like very, it was very crazy. Did you start a new therapist?

I go start too. You did? You're truly the most likely. Yes. Oh, okay. So Rylan's still in the lead. Oh, I know. Let's do a couple more.

Okay. Most likely to hook up. with someone and then block them for no reason. Oh, my God. So in a world where everyone's single. Okay. Well, I think it's all. Hook up and block them for no reason.

Oh, God. I already know who this is. Mr. Handjob queen. Don't release hints to the class. Just skating on by. All right. Ready, three, two, one. Ryland, able to create imagery that really sticks with everyone.

Okay, yeah. How did it end with those people? Did you just stop responding to them? If I didn't ever want to hook up with them again, yeah. Wow. It was never meant to be anything more than that, so I didn't feel bad. Wow. Did they reach out to you and say like, hey?

Yeah, but the reverse would happen to me sometimes. I'd be like, oh, I'd do that again, and they wouldn't, and it's just part of that world. Wow. That would ruin my life. I feel bad not going back to a restaurant if they're nice to me, you know? So that's different. I don't think cancers are capable of such a more. Is a different world?

Like, Grindr in general is a whole different culture. It's like, such an aggressive name. Grindr. Yeah. Did you ever hook up with a cancer that called you crying after? I never, I guess at that time I wasn't interested in. He married him. Yeah, married him.

Okay. This is a clean one. Most likely to do a juice cleanse and quit in two hours. Hmm. Hmm. If Sandy was here, I got a story. A snicker bar is not juice. juice.

Okay. Everyone have one? Yes. All right. Three, two, one clip. Damn it. I put Rylan.

Oh, Chris. Yeah, Chris. Well, I think Chris could be the most easily convinced to, like, I could be like, Chris, come on,

let's do this. And he'd be like, okay. And then Shane would order crumbles and he'd be like, I'm having the crumbles. That's exactly right. That's exactly.

Ironically, I did a juice cleanse and then had in and out right afterwards, and it was the worst diarrhea of my life. Yeah, I probably could have predicted that. I can't even eat ginger anymore because of all the ginger, apple, carrot, banana shit. Ginger is disgusting, but I do like ginger ale.

If it's carbonated, I'll fuck with it. What? Okay. Yeah. All right, should we do one epic finale? One epic finale. What's, okay. I like this game.

Yeah. Okay, this is a good one. Most likely to perform a dramatic monologue before going down on someone. Oh. Should we do a different one? No, no, let's do that one. I feel like I have to put an answer now based off those looks. You just gave each other.

I think I had that answer before then. I'm just going to, it's the game. Fine. Literally, this is not true at all. That's not why I wrote it for the record. I think it's going to, all. All right, ready? Three, two, one.

Oh. Oh, I still got majority. Oh, yeah. Okay, first of all, I was just going with the majority. I was actually going to put Chris. Okay, wait. Why did you put you? you. I put me because I thought you put me.

No, because I am so dramatic. What? You aren't dramatic, but a monologue? The looks you guys gave each other, I thought for sure. What you do? No, what you do before sex is you pretend you're asleep, and then I have to wake you up, and then you're annoyed, and then I'm like, you're hard and you're sleeping, and you want to have sex, but now you're sleeping. Oh, hi.

Why did you guys think Shane? I didn't put Shane. To me, it was the looks that you gave each other. That's why I put me. I thought that was clear. It was me. But I just thought like Shane. I don't know.

You write. You know what I mean? Like, I don't know. I just thought, I don't know. You thought he was doing like a nice poetic gesture. There are definitely actors who do that. Oh, my God. That's a nightmare.

Talk about a boner killer. Okay, let's just do one more. One more. I thought it would be fun. Well, there's a chance. If Chris gets it and Rylan doesn't, it would be a tie for the win. Oh, my God.

Rilin's only one point ahead. Because you guys fucked me with that last time. Okay. Most likely to keep a list of everyone who's ever wronged them. Oh. And then it says including baristas, which is like a stupid judge. If Lizzie was here.

I don't know. Good. All right, everyone had one? I don't know. I don't feel good about it. All right. Rylund. Oh my God.

Literally all of us. All of us. I'm going based off the road range story and stopping in front of people and stuff. I think you know. I only did me because I thought everyone else would do me. Yeah. Yeah. Wait, so who's a winner?

Me, obviously. So Riland is a winner with eight points. Chris is one behind with seven. Jared then and then Shane and I. If you're not first, you're last. Nice. Can I just say me and Spencer have matching Stanlies? I saw that earlier.

I clocked it. Oh my God. Well, there you guys go. That was our first time playing majority rules in the new office. Let us know. Oh my gosh. Leave a comment. Let us know what's a fun most likely to that we could throw into the next one.

But don't be mean. All right, we're going to take a quick little break. When we come back, it is not just conspiracy corner, baby. We've got a couple rabbit holes in there too. See you there. Ooh. Guys, hold on, I don't know if you're aware of this, but you might be paying monthly for some random app that you forgot about, some like make a bubble face app or turn your friend

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and you can unlock even more features with premium. So give it a try, save some money, and let's take this rocket to the moon! You saw the moon shape. I know. our city squad kidding i'm the girl that's on the top of the pyramid and then she falls and then nobody catches her and then they're like oh my god tiffany are you okay somebody call the ambulance for tiffany i think we're going to have to replace her maybe it could be me wow i got dark fast enjoy the show bye hey welcome back okay before we get to conspiracies let's get into a couple rabbit holes tread lightly with this because I really am praying that nothing bad happens. Okay, everybody prayers up. Ready? Prayers up in church. Pee up. Scientology. God. Prayers. Everyone, whoever you prays or not.

We do not want anything bad to happen to the people that are going to Cedar Point. What's that? Amen. I will be going there this summer. Really? Probably. Okay. There is a new roller coaster which I, even I can't do this one. I've been falling down this rabbit hole by proxy. Okay, it is called the Sirens Curse. Chris, have you heard about this? No. Called it a curse? Yeah, that's even crazier that.

They called it that. Let me just show you a clip of what the Sirens Curse looks like. I owe $23,000 in debt right now, so I cannot lose this job. Period. I did my research in advance. Okay, watch. Okay. Looks normal.

We have 34 staffers on air, and I am going to scream each of their. The guy next room is couldn't be more sick of his shit. That's me and Riley. It looks normal so far, right? Yeah. Okay, we're coming to a drop, maybe. Wait a minute. Where's the track?

Huh? Chris, where's the track? Wait. Wait, what? I'm confused. Go down. I don't know what they're waiting for. Is this the drop that we're supposed to be?

Does it go backwards? I'm going to throw back. Oh, my God. Chris. Oh. Oh. It's connecting to the other track. No.

And then it sits there, Katie McRaw, Tessitou, what? No way. Oh my God. Oh, my God. Wow. You know, that's not as bad, though, as hang time at Knott's Berry Farm. Okay. Only because hang time and Knott's Berry Farm, all you got is, like, the crotch pad.

Like, this thing actually has a full-blown arm hanger, all that stuff. So I think that doesn't look as scary because I feel like I'm going to fall out of hang time every time I go on it. My problem is it looks like a final destination movie. Yes. And the second I saw, okay, so this is the commercial I saw. Please don't copyright me, Cedar Point.

I'm giving you a shout out. It's not a great one, but. Yeah, what a shout out. Okay, so here's like the commercial they put out. Okay, yeah. So connecting. And then, okay, what could go wrong, right? A million things.

What could go wrong? Just, you know, it's literally like that video that went viral like two years ago. I think we talked about it where like they were testing a roller coaster that went off the track and then like went to another track and it was like not real because it's insane. Yep. So this track is now connecting with the track under it, right? But what happens if it doesn't? Yes, exactly. And then the fucking thing and then the roller coaster goes off of it.

Right? And as we've experienced that Disney. land things go wrong with roller coaster all the time okay so that started making me spiral right and the second i saw that this launched i was like oh my god something bad is going to happen i don't want it to happen but i just have the worst feeling it's like that final destination feeling i'm like something bad's going to happen and then the first day i'm pretty sure this was an opening day it got stuck no oh it didn't even start get stuck connected no it's stuck it's stuck like that It's stuck like that.

That's crazy. Oh, my God. What if it goes? I don't know. Here's that. I don't know. Oh, no. Okay, so that happens.

And then, well, here's a news footage. Video, and perhaps you saw this on social media showing riders stuck on Siren's curse at Cedar Point. Oh. Told the riders were in the vertical. That's better, at least, in the other way. They were in the vertical position for 10 minutes. Oh. Before getting stuck vertically, the amusement park tells us the ride safety system worked as a

this is building confidence for me here's the thing you know so i think and don't quote me on this and don't assume you guys but i'm pretty sure it has gotten stuck multiple times now since it's only allegedly it got stuck both the first two days from what i gathered on social media and i like the idea of this roller coaster i like the concept but it is a little bit like well what if it doesn't get stuck right before it goes and what if it does release i am a coaster head yeah full on and i don't know if I can do this. I don't, maybe we should, do you guys want us, let us know the comment. Should we go to Cedar Point? Should we try Sirens Curse? I don't know.

We have to do it. I don't know. I think we have to. That is so scary. Let's see how many times it breaks between now and us getting there. Yeah, true. Yeah. Because I was afraid of most roller coasters until we went to six flags. Yeah. And now I feel like I need to prove to myself I can go on any roller coaster. Okay. So I want to go on this. All right. Well, there you guys go. That was my rabbit hole, which was very, very scary. Did any of you guys fall down any holes?

You better of. And then sending threats. Spencer's like, if you don't have a rabbit hole, I'm going to deal with you. It's funny because I don't have one. Jared, I feel like you have. Oh, I was going to say out of fear, I do have one. Oh, let's do it.

If you'd like to go first, I want to hear your service. Your threats feel much more friendly than mine. Yes, yes. Like, if I were to threaten Chris and Lizzie on a, about a sip thing, it would be a lot more of it. Well, the energy's a little different over at the SIP. It'd be like, give me a fucking rabbit hole, or you don't show up to work.

That's true. All right, Chris. Yeah, give it to us. A rabbit hole. So, uh, this happened because as I was going to sleep, I thought I heard the loudest car accident I've ever heard in my life happen outside of my apartment, which does happen, unfortunately, too often at the street near my apartment. But I looked outside.

There was no car accident. And it felt like it happened right next to my ear. Like, it felt like the cars collided in my room somehow. Okay. And I was like, What was that? Am I losing my mind? Did something fall? And I started Googling. And I don't know that this is what it was, but it feels like it might be. Apparently there's a thing called exploding head syndrome, which is a real sleep condition where a person suddenly hears a loud, imagine noise. It sounds like a bomb going off or a gunshot or a firework or a car accident or a door slamming as they're falling asleep or as you're waking up. There's no pain. But it, yeah, it's a terrifying thing you feel like crazy anxiety as it happens. Some people have like a flash of light that accompanies it as it happens. Doctors don't really know what causes it. There's like some theories

but it's like a thing that happens to people and I'm like is that what happened? Does it just happen randomly or is it a one time thing? I think it can happen more than once but for some people it'll just happen once from what I was reading. I don't know too much about it but yeah I don't know There's theories about, like, things misfiring or whatever. It's not dangerous, but it feels terrifying. And everything I was reading, I'm like, that sounds like what happened to me? I don't know. So you're one and done?

You've already exploded your head? I hope so. Had the syndrome last one explosion? Or was it just a firework? No. Was it the 4th of July? That would be so funny. It was not the 4th of July.

Wait a minute. It happened so much. You calendar, Chris. No, no, no. It was not the 4th of July. And it's, again, it didn't sound. I've heard firewomen. I've launched fireworks.

It was not right next to my ear when I launched. You know what I mean? I don't know. Again, I don't know that that's what it was. But the fact that that's a real thing that exists for some reason is terrified. It's also less scary. Like, calling something exploding head syndrome, it's just like, you hear a firework in your brain.

I'm like, they could have gone softer with that name. A little, little less scary. I don't get an explosion in my head, but I do get like, and then I wake up. And then I wake up. And I'm like, what the fuck was that? Hey, we know you probably hit play to escape your business banking, not think about it. But what if we told you there was a way to skip over the pressures of banking?

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I hear people screaming my name. What? Jared! And then I'm like, no. Yes. I've had that to, Shane, Shane, Shane! And then I wake up and I'm expecting Riley to be there and no one's there. What the fuck?

I fall, but I've never banged. Yeah, I get the falling, yeah. Yeah. Well, good rabbit hole, Chris. Thank you. The prayers up to your head. Dude, you blew my mind. Whoa.

Uh, Jared, what is your rabbit? Okay, so this one's actually a little bit sad. Oh. Okay. There are a lot of animals going extinct right now. Oh. Because I heard a quote that 99% of species that have ever existed, you know, since the dawn of creation, are now extinct. So I was thinking, well, what is going extinct right now?

And there's a very sad story, guys. Oh. About the Yangtzee giant soft shell turtle. There's only three of them in existence. We need one. Two of them are in Vietnam in their national. natural habitat. One of them is in China at a zoo. We can get there. There is two males and one female. So there's only opportunity, you know, for two of these guys and one of these females. And one of the guys has a broken penis. No. Imagine. It's up to you. Just imagine there's only, you know, you're the only possibility to expand a population and you have a broken penis. That's a Seth Rogen movie.

That's like it's a saddest thing ever, you know. But, also panda bears. There's only about 1,800 of them left. China owns all of them. Okay. And evidently, they're on the verge of extinction by 2050, and it's because they only ovulate once a year and there's a 40-hour window

for them to be impregnated. And they're too busy being funny at the zoo for anyone to take notice. You know, and they're dumb, you know, unfortunately, well, they are. They're not the smartest animal in comparison to like most living creatures. They're falling all over the place, and they'll fall out of

They'll basically be on a branch on a tree and then break it and they'll fall. I'm not realizing why they just fell. So animals going extinct was a huge one for me. And I got a creepy one, guys. Have you ever looked at the Statue of Liberty and thought, is that really a woman? Huh? And here, I will send you a picture. And I was thinking, like, the Statue of Liberty, like, I wonder what the story behind that is.

And I recently... How does the statue identify? Well, Lady Liberty. Well, it's Lady Liberty, but I just air. drop something to somebody in this room. I got it. Guys, just tell me right now. That on the left is a painting of Lucifer on the right, the Statue of Liberty, and a little bit of context.

So the Statue of Liberty was gifted to the United States in 1875 by the French. And supposedly, it's supposed to watch over our country, show everyone our freedom and all of this. But there is a group of Freemasons that gave it to us. and it's supposed to symbolize Lucifer and the curse of the United States. So we might all be on a cursed land right now because of the Statue of Liberty. We're very far from New York. All the New York's curse. Wait, is that why she's wearing a crown of like spikes?

Because that's the sun and the bearer of light. That's what Lucifer stands for. And she's holding a torch. I will say she is ripped. Like she is carved out. I mean, there's nothing. Body tea. Yes.

So I'm just saying, if you live. Look at the left, and that was painted almost 100 years before this. So it's not like someone thought, hey, it'd be pretty funny to, like, paint the Statue of Liberty and call Lucifer. It was the opposite. Okay. That's scary. And then one more rabbit hole. I just thought this was kind of interesting because we talk a lot about manipulation when it comes to, like, stores or retailers and things of that nature.

But evidently, there are airlines. Have you ever bought a ticket for an airplane and it asked you your name, your gender, your birthday, all this stuff? they're using that information to gauge how much they are going to charge you. So if you're like a 50-year-old male that lives in, you know, a certain state, they're going to charge you more than if you're like a 30-year-old female that lives in a different state. And there's a guy, Senator Hawley, that actually in like the Supreme Court, called out all these companies on it. And they admitted that they do have algorithms that decide the pricing for tickets on airplanes.

Whoa. Yeah. So I'm just saying all. We were looking to something like that. Yes, we try. Okay, first of all, I feel like both of these things are conspiracies, too. Yeah. Yeah. So. No better rabbit hole. I feel like now we can transition into, hey, guys, we're in a conspiracy corner.

That's crazy. And also, very true. There are a lot of examples of different companies charging different prices based on who you are, what information you put in. Also, like, what internet you're connected to. Like, did we talk about that? Yeah, yeah. It was like a lot of companies do it, too. It's airlines do it. And then also travel booking sites do it. And then also for a while, DoorDash was doing it because they would be like if you had an iPhone, they would charge you more. And so if you had a cheap Android. And didn't think it actually sued for that? Yeah, they did. And so they had to stop doing it.

Yeah. Speaking of things that are very, very scary. This was supposed to be funny and cute and teahy. But then it got really, thank you. Yes, it was a conspiracy tea. Then it got scared tea. Okay. So we got an email.

Hold on. Let me pull it up. A tea mail. We got a T-mail from a viewer named Tyler. Hey, Tyler. So Tyler said, hey, Shane and team. I was endlessly scrolling on TikTok, and I found this video saying

that ChatGPT can take your face from a photo of you and turn it into a literal model photo shoot. All you have to do is use this prompt. So he showed us his, so he put in a picture of him, by the way, already looking like a model. Yeah, come on. Minor flex. He's like, turn me into a model, T.

And then he put it in Chat, ChiPT, put that prompt and then it turned into this. Oh. Pretty cool, right? That looks very real. Yeah. Like Nike ad, yeah. Right.

If I never have to take a photo again, thanks to chat GPT, I am out of this. That old chore taking photo. Oh, my God. It's my biggest nightmare. Well, get ready, because this theory actually involves you. So I put in pictures of all of us. And I was like, oh, let me turn us all into this, you know, sweaty, you know, fun thing. Okay.

So we'll start with me. Yikes. I look. Okay, God, cheer up. Okay, so I put in that picture of me, and then it turned into this. Okay. Pretty good, pretty good. Okay.

I'm not mad at it. Whoa. Okay, so then I put in a picture of Jared. It didn't have to too much. Chad GPT was like, yeah, give me a bigger challenge. Okay, and turned it into the... Oh, yeah, that's pretty good. I like that the glasses are steamy.

Yeah. Okay. Put in a picture of Spencer. Turned it into a little scary, but still cute. You kind of look like the killer in a movie. He looks like Evan Peters. It added Crow's Feet for some reason. Because Spencer's the youngest one.

You don't have pros feet. Yeah. Maybe it's a prediction. It added wisdom. Okay, so that looks good. Looks good. Okay. Put a picture of Chris.

Now, this picture of Chris, I could have went with a more normal one, but I want to see what it would do with this. Turned it into the... Oh, my God. What did they do to your teeth? I want that on a shirt. That's true serial killer. That's iconic.

Do you remember in the ring when they open the closet and the girls' face? That's what that looks like. It kind of looks like Jim Carrey in the mask. Why do I love it? I can't even look at it. The eyes are so soulless. So then I put in Rylins. Okay.

So I gave a picture of Rylid eating an apple, but I was kind of fun. So then it turned him into it. Okay. Doesn't look like Rylan at all, right? Yeah. Then I remembered, oh my God. Every time I've tried to make a picture of Rylan with Chad GBT, it makes this person. And it's not Rylan.

Okay. Let me show you another one. So I put it in this picture. Cute, right? It looks like Rialin. Yeah, he needs a haircut. Okay. Chad GBT turned it into that. Whoa.

What is that guy? All of you did look like you. It's the same guy from the other one, right? So then I try another picture. So here's a picture of Rylan smile. And then it turns it into that same fucking guy. What? But it's not Rylan.

And it doesn't look like Rylan at all. at all. And then I remembered back like a couple months ago when that trend went around where it was like, turn yourself into a Barbie doll. I turned Ryland into a Barbie doll. And it's that same fucking guy. Who the fuck is that guy? So it reminded me of, you know, that like old thing?

We talked about it years ago, but there's like this guy that everybody sees in their dreams and you don't know why. It's like this iconic face of this random guy. I don't know who the fuck this person is in AI, but AI Rylan is like a different entity and it's insane. Like who the fuck is that? You are on, Chad GPD is unable to make you. It just makes him.

I'm honored. But here's where it got my brain rolling. I was like, is that what you actually look like? And we're all seeing something else. And Chad GBT is seeing the real thing. I don't really see my, I feel like none of us really see ourselves. You know what I mean? So I wouldn't know.

But what if like you're literally not you? What if you're that guy? Like is Ryanlyn a shapeshifter and like Chad Gipt sees the real him? Oh, wow. I don't know. It's fucking weird. But literally, yeah, you can try to home. Try it.

Put a picture of Rhineland in charge of you. It will make this man. I did make one. Let me see. What if you like wake up one day and he's like, hey, how's going? I'm done. Oh my God. Ew.

It's me, Rylan. So this one does look a little bit more like me. That does not look like you at all. Why are you so, why are you shitting in the middle of the fuck? What is this? That looks like that guy. It looks like that guy again. He's stronger than me.

That does not look like you. Wow. He's really can't get Ryan. Also, why is Kim Kardashian behind you? Because she was in real life. Period. Wow, that's really, really scary. I don't know what it means, but it's fucking scary.

Okay, this next one. So this was interesting because, guys, if you haven't seen, maybe like a month ago, we posted a video where I had a theory that TikTok has shadow banned me. Every time I post a TikTok, it flops. But if somebody out in the world posted TikTok of me, it does really well for some reason. It's happened multiple times. We even created a fake TikTok account with zero followers for Spencer, Hungry Boy, posted a TikTok

there. that didn't really well like four million views now i posted a tictock the other day flops so we got a bunch of people sending his email saying shana happen again this one pissed me off specifically okay so this is an email from alissa shut out eliza and she said update on the ticot going viral she said that she saw this going viral and she thinks that it confirms that i am shadow band because here is a tic talk of me at uh ne riley getting on a roller coaster at six flags And you guys will not believe who I saw Has 385,000 likes

I don't know how many views that is But I'm sure it's like what It's maybe 6 million-ish views or something Okay, it is just a picture It's not even a video And that got a bunch of views But my personal TikTok flops I really need help with my TikTok

Can I take a picture of you? Sure, why not? That's your new service Oh my God You help people go viral That sucks Yeah I sure

What was that Dane Cook movie where they couldn't get married until they dated Dane Cook? Good luck, Shane. Yes. Yeah. Okay. This is another update involving TikTok. So this was an email from Anna Marie. Anna Marie said, hey, Shane and everyone, I've been watching since the Jenny Craig days.

Oh, my God. Wow. Shout out. She said, I was watching the episode where you guys were talking about all the fake comments on the Megan trailer. Remember we talked about that where it was like people shifting the narrative in the comment sections, right? So she said, this is. actually true. She watched a video about it. There are websites where you can buy comments on TikTok and you can say what you want the narrative to be. And then Spencer found a couple websites to do

this. So this is real. This is confirmed that you can literally buy comments and tell the bots what you want to get across. It was like a whole form. A whole form. But I will say I have noticed ever since we did that episode, I cannot stop noticing the bot comments on all of the new movie trailers that are coming out. It's crazy. Guys, have fun. Go check out any new movie trailer and you will see all the comments and they're so fake it's crazy so if you are on instagram TikTok YouTube whatever and you're going to the comments to see what your opinion should be stop doing that because it's literally not real it's literally not real it's crazy so that's so true yeah okay this is another update about the celebrity color theory it's so crazy

that like as years go on our conspiracies that we talk about on the show are just real yeah you think Jared, you think pink. Oh, the pink behind him. Since I have a color now, am I going to take off? You're purple, baby, yes. So if you guys don't remember, every big pop star and celebrity has a color story, right? Sabrina Carpenter, she chose sky blue. Everything around her sky blue.

Olivia Rodriguez, she, Rodriguez? Rodriguez. Olivia Rodriguez. Olivia Rodriguez. She chose purple. Sorry, Chris. She beat you. And so everything's purple, right?

Well, we have a new one on the scene. We got an email from Sarah. she said, hey, I don't know if you've heard of this new country star that's popping off right now. Her name is Megan Maroney. If you look her up, she's chosen the color dark blue. Okay, she chose it first. And if you Google her, every single picture is her with dark blue. And then her tour, everything, her outfits.

And then you go to her Spotify and it's all dark blue, baby. And she's blowing up right now. So it's working. Wow. Is it crazy? It works. Listen to her. I met a, like, relatively new up-and-coming music artist who was influenced by you

to pick a color and stick with it. Really, what they pick? Pink. Well, Jared's pink. Oh, yeah, sorry, Jared. Sorry. So that's crazy. I don't know.

I need to look more into that, but it's all coming true, guys. Okay, so Dollar Tree. I was trying to play in a Dollar Tree conspiracy van video, because I feel like that would be fun, and you're a huge Dollar Tree stand. We should go to all of them

at opening the day of restock, just to see. If they got how bills. Okay, so I was like looking into these theories and trying to figure out, something fun and i did find a few so we actually might be able to do this video but one of them that i just thought was kind of funny to introduce was the idea of why dollar tree doesn't play music

i've only been into a dollar tree like once before i was more of a 99-cent store girl so we went to the dollar tree in calado i know recipe um and i did notice this they don't play music and it's really uncomfortable and it's just like a um of like the air conditioning and it's like it's almost weird i'm like where is the music well the theory is number one that it's just too much money to pay for the rights for music so they don't play it have to inside of a store can you just turn on the radio it is the most of embarrassing store to fart in by far we can test that it's like b y o m okay but the theory is that the silence makes you hyper aware and slightly uncomfortable so that you move faster through the store and get out faster and what about the

employees they just rot in there without music are you kidding me you don't work on me well why would they want their customers to leave. Because they want, get in, get out, get the fuck out of here. They don't want people lingering around. It's kind of like the 15-minute chair of the retail environment, you know? What do you mean? Well, fast food restaurants specifically have chairs that are called 15-minute chairs that nobody wants to sit in for more than that amount of time.

So you can just get it and get out. You know, like, get that out of here. McDonald's, the steel, uncomfortable chairs? They can't move if they're like locked into the ground. No. Wow, interesting. Okay. This next one is about Costco. Guys, there's a few Costco theories that I thought we could delve into these. I don't know if we'll ever do an actual Costco video because they're so crazy about filming in there. Every time we've tried to vlog in there, they yell at us. Yeah, they really do. So I don't know if we can film the video there. Maybe we get a body cam. I think the glasses.

Maybe if you just don't take me, it will work. Oh, yeah. Okay. So the chicken theory. Before I get it. into it. Let me just show you this video. Costco's $5 rotisserie chicken is one of the best deals that you can get at the store because it's so cheap that they lose money on every single chicken they sell, but it's actually a very strategic way for Costco to increase their average customer value. Because first, the chicken is at the back of the store. So you have to walk past all the aisles filled with bulk deals like TVs and furniture and all other impulse products. And they know that by the time that you get to the chicken, your cart has like $200 with the stuff.

And unlike most grocery stores, Costco's entire layout forces you to explore. There's no clearly labeled aisles. You have to kind of hunt for meat. And while you're searching, you end up buying even more stuff. Yes. And because everyone knows the $5 chicken is such a great deal, it becomes part of the Costco brand to offer such crazy deals. So all the other products they offer seem like a better deal just by association.

Huh. Okay. Genius, by the way. Yeah. So the fact that they're losing money. money on their chickens, but it doesn't even fucking matter because you're buying a bunch of other shit because you're like, I'm getting this chicken for free, basically. Okay, so that's crazy. So then that led me down the Costco rabbit hole. How do you feel as a chicken owner? I mean, they're worth

more than $5 to me. Exactly. Okay, so there's another theory that Costco was built to normalize surveillance retail. Let me explain. So the theory is that Costco was actually an early experiment in prepping the public for modern trackable shopping experiences. QR codes, loyalty cards, digital IDs, all of these came decades ago before it was mainstream. So Costco is trying to normalize that, desensitize us, make us think it's normal so that now it doesn't seem so crazy to have everything you're doing tracked. Literally everything you do in Costco is being tracked, being monitored. Even their membership, it's like they're watching every single thing you buy, which they're one of the only stores that do that. also do something that we've talked about in videos before where they white label. So basically,

they have their own brand, which is called Kirkland. And when you see a Kirkland product, it's usually cheaper. And you're like, oh, it's the Costco brand. But actually, Kirkland, allegedly, although I think some of it's been proven, but allegedly works with the big guys. You know, so for example, Kirkland batteries are actually the same supplier as Duracel, which basically means you can get Duracel batteries or you can get Kirkland for way cheaper. And it's supposedly the same exact batteries. Also, diapers. Supposedly, their diapers are made by the same manufacturer

who makes huggies, which is an expensive brand of diapers. Their eggs that they sell under the Kirkland label, supposedly, allegedly, are the same eggs that you get for very expensive at Whole Foods. Really? Which is crazy. So I'm like, I don't know how they're doing that or why they're doing that.

It's buying power. So if you're a brand and you want to be sold at Costco, they're not going to allow you to sell your brand at the prices that you're demanding in other stores. So in order to not devalue your brand, they just label it under the Kirkland brand. Right. Because I think Kirkland's vodka is great goose.

Yes, that's another one. I have questions about the Dura cell. If it's the same thing, so they're selling, because they sell Durasel at Costco and then the same thing cheaper? They make a bigger profit margin on the ones that they make themselves. Because being sold at a Costco or doing business with a Costco is like big time for any kind of a brand or any kind of a manufacturer. even worse is

Costco's like we want to put you in every single store and the brand's like great but then you have to front the cost to make the merchandise to put in the store and then if it doesn't sell they just keep marking it down and you lose all your money that's crazy but that's another reason Kirkland is so big because a lot of brands can't do it

so they just do it themselves wow so they basically like it's almost like allegedly like the mafia like muscling people into their own brand yeah but they get free samples and that should be and the hot dogs are cheap.

They take a loss on the hot dogs too, right? They do, yes. That should be the conspiracy. Will they stop giving free samples to one person if they're just there all day asking for them? Yeah. They say they won't. They say they won't.

Really? Put me in front of their free tequitos. I'll test that theory. Okay. We should do that. That would be awesome. Well, speaking of Costco pissing off companies, this is going viral right now and oh my God. The Canadian retailer taking action against these reported copycats.

Filing a 49-page lawsuit against Costco, alleging the warehouse chain has unlawfully traded upon Lulu Lemon's reputation, goodwill, and sweat equity by selling unauthorized and unlicensed apparel. Adding, some customers incorrectly believe these infringing products are authentic Lulu Lemon apparel. Some of the pieces in question, the $8 Dan Skin half-zip pullover. The complaint claims it's a copy of Lulu Lemon's scuba. That sells for $1.18. And two women's yoga jackets from Costco, which cost a fraction of $LU. Oh, my God. $28 Define Jacket.

And Costco's store brand Kirkland Five Pocket Performance Pants sold online for just 10 bucks. Oh, my God. It's a good deal. Okay, first of all, I saw so many reels of this, people going to Costco and bringing their Lulu Lemon outfits and comparing it. They're like, it's the same. It looks the same. It looks the same. It literally is like the same thing, but you can get it for 10.

dollars versus 120 how can they even sell pants for ten dollars i don't know but the fact that literally cosco is ripping off lulu to a point where people are like oh these are the same exact thing what a great commercial for costco oh my god just see this yeah but cheap chicken cheap lulu it also reminds me like when i worked at jc penny and there would be like a clearance section and like things would get clearance down to like a dollar sometimes and i was like oh so you guys are losing like a lot of money on this close no we're still making a profit And I'm like on the dollar things. So when you were selling them for like 80 bucks originally, how much a profit were you making?

Right. It's crazy. Well, speaking of people ripping us off, Spencer, you fell down a rabbit hole about AI music. And you were telling me about it. And I was like, we need to do this on the podcast. It gets crazy. It really was a true rabbit hole of like something that's like going on all around us that we don't really realize about. So this started Cassidy sent in a send an email and said, this.

This is a hilarious song called Cuck Chair. But then... Chris is sitting in a Cuck Chair. And so it's from this album, Barnyard Bangers Volume 1 with this woman with big tits. Okay. And the artist is... And so the artist is Beast Bay Eye. Get to Toronto's main venues like Budweiser Stage and the new Roger Stadium with Go Transit.

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Buy your online go pass ahead of the show at go-transit.com slash tickets. I'm sitting in the cug chair sipping real slow, drinking my whiskey watching the show. Wait. good. All along, wife's getting folk

following my phone. She's taking it deep in the motel she's... Anyway. Okay. Oh. Wow. Okay. So that started this whole thing.

And so then I was looking into this. And so I found that there's this, this is the first court case ever of someone getting in trouble over AI music. So this is the first ever AI streaming case. Cockchair? No, no, no. No, no, no.

I wrote that. What was Cuckchair? That's just how I got into it. someone a fan sent that in and just like ha ha this is like the show this is great for the show oh so coch chair is an a i song it's not a real not a guy singing and everything not real the artist is not real the artist is beats by ai oh and so this is becoming a huge thing on spotify so this is good this guy this guy mike smith he's a music producer work with people like snoop dog be there it's ivers wu tang dj cal i'm dmc all these people and so he got discovered that he was using ai basically

mass creating a fake ai artist and just having them stream on spotify and just having them stream on spotify and just making a bunch of money. And you think, like, how much money would you make? But so he made 10,000 different fake email addresses. He, like, made, like, a code or something to do this. 10,000 fake email addresses. Each one is a different account. And so he basically made this software so that these accounts just stream each other's music.

It's just streaming, streaming, and he's raking in all the profits. And so he was doing it for years. He teamed up with the CEO of, like, an AI company, helped to make all these fake artists and make more different, like, AI music. And he was uploading over a thousand songs a week. And that he basically found out that he could stream his songs around 600,000, 250,000 times a day. Oh my God. And so that's a daily royalty payment of $3,300.

So over a million a year. By 2019, he was earning $110,000 a month. Whoa. And so these are some of the pictures of like these artists. So it's like, you know, it's something you would never like blink at. It's like, oh, this is just a small musician on Spotify, 7,000 plays, nothing crazy. And that led me to another thing. And so Spotify employees recently have started coming out saying that Spotify is telling their employees to promote AI artists.

Why? Because, you know, a lot of people listen to these like created playlists by Spotify. And so they're basically stuffing a bunch of AI artists in there mixed with real artists. And they're basically doing it because when their real artist gets played, they have to pay the money. But if it's an AI artist, they don't have to pay anybody. It's like Kirkland. Yeah. Spotify has Kirkland artists.

Oh, my gosh. And so this is, they call it. Perfect, internally, they call it PFC, perfect fit content. Stop. Low budget stock music for the platform, but from these firms on Spotify's curated playlists. So they're working with these like AI firms to pay less. Oh my God. So they'll probably pay what?

Like I'll give you five bucks a track. I don't know. I don't know. Because this is just like employees coming forward. The other thing was like core case. So I don't know all the details to this one. It's a good business model because Spotify's become my radio. Like I just listen to playlists.

And then they feed me what they want. So you could be listening to like a top hits and there could just be an AI song in there. And you're like, because that happens to me sometimes where I'll be like, oh my God, who is this artist? I've never even heard of this. That's half of what I hear on Spotify is art. Ew. Well, dude, maybe we could get some fucking music into Dollar Tree now.

Maybe Dollar Tree can just go to an AI music person saying we'll give you $10 a month. Oh, yeah. They want me in their store. Well, speaking of things that Jared has wowed us with, this I just want to say, let's give Jared has flowers because sometimes he has a theory that people might think is crazy, might think is stupid, might think is silly. Most of the time. And then years later, oh, now everybody's putting on their tinfoil hats and they're like, what do you think about this? And I'm like, Jared already said that. And this one is going viral again. And let me just say, this, I don't think Jared originated it,

but he's how I found out about it. The theory that mountains are just tree stumps from when giants ruled the earth. Do you remember telling that story? Okay. And I remember everybody in the room thought he was crazy. We're all laughing. And we're like, ha ha ha, that's so funny. Now it's going viral again. And people are starting to open up their brains. All right. These aren't mountains. These are tree stumps. See? Look, they filled it up. There you see. I think even AI could have done a better mock-up. I thought it was like a plane. Sorry, Jared, and the internet. I don't believe it.

So the theory is that every time you see a mountain like that, it's actually. just an old tree stump because we all used to be giants and giants used to rule the earth and trees were that fucking big yeah and now they're just mountains so guys you think you might think it's crazy but this theory is taken over and a lot of people are talking about it what do you mean by taking over i'm saying that has hundreds of millions of views on facebook and all the facebook mommies are like oh my god mountains or trees i mean aren't they like just drinking white wine aren't aren't there giants in like the bible and stuff aren't yes the nephalum yeah giants of been around guys and you brought this up on the last episode a couple episodes ago where you said

that we used to be giants and everybody was like ha ha-tie yeah well someone still is like that the littlest person in the room shocker well speaking of speaking of the littlest person in the room you're got to talk to the mic speaking of the littlest person in the room okay we heard you flexing oh he said he didn't but yeah it was faint it was just your little voice you can carry speaking of people who inside think they're giants I think it's time for a recap My camera action Ryland's recap

is about to happen Ryland's recap On today's episode of the Shane Dawson podcast We are in the new office And that sparked bigger And better conspiracies than ever Wow

Oh, Rylent has rage Oh, you thought I was angry on the podcast Wait till you see me on the roads That's a good one I'm not that angry. I'm just a chill girl. Okay. Jared's 40.

Sally? Oh, no. Is Sally going to make her entrance into the new set? Jared's all this fucking. Sally, that's so rude. Shut up, Spencer. Oh, my God. She has an attitude today.

Seems like Sally has a rage problem, too. You should take Sally driving with you, and then that could be... Sally, how do you feel about the new office space? It's all right. A little hot in here. Stature of Liberty is really stature of Satan. Oh, haughty alert. Oh, wait, Satan?

Hotty alert? Yeah, daddy of the weed. He was ripped, and I was like, ooh, he's hot. But then, oh, no, he's hot. Oh, the roller coaster. Sirens curse. Sirens curse. Hates to see Jared and Sandy coming.

Are you guys really going there this summer? I believe so. Fair enough. You know, we're going to go to different cities. do some house tour so you guys can see how much house cost all across the country

but also theme parks yes Costco chickens are cheap fuck you Costco undervaluing our chickens when Jared owns them are you joking me

and hot dogs too I know this is like a good good boy to get people into your stores but I still want to take you down okay I'm angry now my rage is coming out why are chicken so cheap

and eggs are so expensive Oh, don't get started. Why are we killing all the chickens who are making the eggs and selling them for nothing when eggs are so expensive? Oh, exactly. Exactly. I pissed. Wake it up, Costco. You've got some explaining to do.

Oh, Spencer needs a Latino woman. Oh, and if you're looking to date, Spencer, and you happen to be Latino. Uh, Latina. Oh. Specifically a. Specifically. Okay. He's not open to the O, only the ah, in this current time frame.

But if you're looking to date, Spencer, hit us up. Oh, wait, what's your email? Shane Dosson Podcast stuff at Gmo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And while you're thinking of Shane Dusson podcast stuff, you might as well check out the Patreon. It's delicious, and in one month,

he's posted over 28 pieces of content. Honestly, it's too bad. Some would call it mentally ill. Others would call it entertaining. No, I'm proud of you. He's going live all the time. He's posting lots of videos. It's so funny.

When you do the price breakdown, like 799, 28, by 799 that's like nothing per video with this yeah that's true and that's not even count half a chicken that's not even counting for all of the live streams and the chats that you have to hold hands to get through because it moves so quickly it's so far i'll just because i have the email notifications i ended up like last night at like 11 30 p.m i'm just like shane dawson is live right now it's like what is he doing i'm sorry i'm just always in the chat but anyways it's a good Chats lit.

Shrap for Shane Dossom merch at shandawsonmerch.com. Follow all of us on social media and our respective YouTube platforms. And we cannot wait to see you here in two weeks on the Shane Dosson podcast. We hope you love our set. Let us know your thoughts in the comment section below. And remember, we're work in progress. But so aren't you. Okay.

Okay. Right. Yes, you aren't. We love you very much. We'll see you next week. Bye-bye. Wow. That was a good one.

What a good one. Guys, I'm not, I don't want to jinx it, but I feel like this is the start of something really good. I love this episode. I had so much fun in our new space. It felt so homey. Space tea. Space was tea. Yeah, I'm so excited.

Hopefully you guys enjoyed it. We had so much fun. And yeah, we will see you guys in two weeks. See you next time. Bye. Thank you.