The Show - FESTIVUS 2025

Episode Date: December 19, 2025

We are live from Lock 1 Distilling Co. in Phoenix, NY for our annual Festivus show. Feats of strength. Airing of grievences. Lots of booze. Lots of laughs. And so much more on a Friyay!

We interrupt this program. Previously, critics had brailed against the duo as crude, dumb, ugly, thoughtless, sexist, self-destructive, and foolish. They are not part of the legitimate business world. What they do is they celebrate underachievement. And all candor, I would tell you it's outrageous, Phil. And if I could find somewhere constitutionally to do away with it, I would. Fastness, baby! Do noises.

Happy Festivist, 2020. Happy birthday. Here we are. And Lock One Distilling Company in Phoenix, New York, my kind of festivist, because it took me five minutes to get here. Yeah, right? I know. This is the shortest drive ever for your scooter.

Yeah, I could walk home if I wanted to, and if I get drunk enough, I just might need to. Just go up the river. There's not a community horse you all ride around or something. There will be a horse. Where are, right there at the farmer's market. Sometimes the Amish come out with their goods. Right now, looking over there going, what? There might be a horse.

There's usually a horse and buggy over there for the Amish trees. I thought maybe we'd have sleigh rides. Oh, Nate's going to be doing sleigh rides later. We're going to saddle them right up. Perfect. Yeah, he's going to run around the outside. We're leaving on the mall road. We have no snow as.

I know what happened last night. I don't know. Yeah. I woke up and it's 52 damn degrees outside. I think under that dirt pile right there, there's snow. So we're going to have a real nice muddy, wet, sloppy brown Christmas. Discussing, sloppy brown Christmas.

I heard it's supposed to get snowy again. All right. Yeah, it would be great if it could just melt all this, leave it nice and wet, and then freeze immediately. And then we can all drive around on slippy, slimy loads. Sort of like my ex-wife. Oh, my God. Wow, Joe. We are here at Lockwood Distilling in Phoenix, New York.

If you're not watching this year's theme, Long Winter's Nap. A couple of Ebenezer Scrooge is up here. I wish there's some pockets, though. Oh, no, there's not. No, I don't know. I mean. I could put my phone in the front of where my long johns are because I have boxers, so I could technically just... Oh, wow, nice.

I got the little thing in my underwear. I texted, I told the boys, after I took these out of their packages, I said, boys, you're going to want to wear some shorts underneath these. Because I think once the sun comes up behind us, you're seeing our Ds and Bs coming right through here. Good. These are going to be totally see-through, I think, as big white nightgowns. About time. We have our candlesticks. Four to see who goes there.

Who goes there? Who goes there? I'll leave mine right there. I put a shutter. Yeah. Hark? A clackering on the roof? Absolutely jam-packed festival show, as always.

We're going to be playing games. We've got your feats of strength in various feats of strength today. We will have our dollar store gift exchange that I see so many people have already participated in. We will have our airing of the grievances, and I appreciate so many of you airing your grievances. One of Pat Lucas's grievances was that not enough of you air your grievances, so I posted last night. I like it. received a lot of grievances from a lot of people, so we'll share some of those. We have giveaways throughout the morning.

There's a Mama Mac prize pack that your mother has just put together from things in her home, right? You didn't want to throw them away? There's things that she won, I think, and then didn't want to get rid of. She's re-gifting them. Okay, that's good. The mom of my prize pack, yep. We have some smoking accessories from Scotty over at East Coast Emeralds to give away. We will give, I believe, a private tour of the distillery at the end of the show today for a few lucky people.

There's a lot going on here at Lockwood Distilling Company. You can tune in and look at our beautiful outfits at Twitch.com. At twitch.tv. TV slash K-Rock C-N-Y. Hello. The audience is drinking. We are getting things rolling. Happy Festivus. This is K-Roc.

To design the Lexus ES, all we had to do was listen. Your ears said exactly where to put the speakers. Your eyes told us where to put the elevator. Available head-up display. Hey, Lexus, find me an alternate route. Even your right foot helped out. It let us know you'd enjoy a little more torque. Turns out, you had a lot to tell us.

We certainly heard you. The Lexus ES, not just for you, by you. See Burdick Lexus and Cicero. Who couldn't smooth a soaked sheet if you had a hot date with a bake? It's Festivus with the show. I lost my train of thought. We're live from Lock One Distilling. On K Rock

Yes it is And yes We are Happy Festivus For the rest of us Live here at Lock One Distilling in Phoenix, New York

Who goes there? Hello Who goes there? You're like the old bong with the candle Oh, yes That'd be the worst In olden times

We'd light our bombs With candles Those are the guys That when they see Us back in the day Going out to the woods and lighten up a Pepsi can or an apple, they're like,

back in my day, we had to light a candle, and who's that? We had to whittle a bowl. We had to carve a bowl out of whale bone, and we had to wait for a whale to wash us all. Do you want to give away a smoking accessory? I was going to say, let's go bigger, go home. You want to go big, right out the gate?

Before everybody even gets here, you want to do that. Right up the gate, all right at the gate. Go bigger or go home. Scotty over at East Coast donated a whole bunch of smoking accessories, and Coco wants to be generous. The early bird gets the, I love it. So go over to boss lady and grab a ticket.

That ticket can go right back in. I'll grab a ticket. Ooh, from a... From a little sack. From Josh's sack. From my mesh sack. Okay, I got one here. Ticket number.

Look at your ticket numbers. Is it the whole thing? Yeah, I guess. I don't know. The 0-0-2-80. 1-2-80. Who's got 1-2-8-0? Someone does.

So somebody does. Come on. Look at your tickets, guys. There's only so many of us here. We'll sit here for three hours. I'll hold this until someone... None of you do. All right.

Okay. That's it. How did we fail on the first giveaway? Someone does. Someone's going to go, oh, son of a bitch, I've got 1-280. 1-280, nobody? Just make sure I'm not being an idiot. Well, you do, you have your spectacles on.

That's what I'm saying. I've got my specs on. All right, put that back in the bag. Okay. 1-2-8-0. Okay. Let's try again. Pull another winner out there.

Do it again. East Coast Emerald's over there behind. Wait, we found it? Whoa. She was in conversation. I won't blame for that. Congratulations. Here, have a huge bomb.

Here, I put that back in because you can keep playing the games. You're going to keep playing. All right. You might win another smoking. I did not watch last night's football game, but apparently it ended crazy. Yeah. I tried to not watch it because I, you know, I knew it had to be up earlier than usual. But what a game.

What happened? QB Sam Darnold of the Seahawks through what was thought to be an incomplete pass. So weird. That was tipped and bounced into the end zone. After further review, officials noticed it was actually a backward pass, meaning it was a fumble picked up by the Seahawks, meaning it was a good conversion. Yes.

This took the game into overtime where the Seahawks ended up beating the Rams 3837. But as crazy as that all sounds, it's crazier. Because what he did, if, like, Josh was Sam Darnold, I was the running back, I was up just a little bit. Josh, that means, or I was back, that means it was a backwards pass, and it bounced. Right. And the guys were like, oh, the play's over. So a guy just walked over and picked up the football, and he was just standing in the end zone

and turned to walk away. And the referee went, put his hands up, and everyone's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait. So they reviewed it, and they were like, yeah, it was a backwards pass. So why you play to the whistle boys, you don't stop playing until that whistle blows. And overtime, the Seahawks went to, they were going to tie it with an extra point. And they're like, you know, screw it. Let's just go for two and win the game. And they did.

So everything about all that was just insane. That was a good game. I mean, not to brag, but our Phoenix Varsity Boys team beat Syracuse. What is, Science Academy last night? Yes, we did. And overtime. Shootie hoops. Shooty hoop, buddy.

They live above the rim out here in Phoenix. That's the school right across from Harrison Bakery. So you know your boy got some half moons at the time. house right now i'm not going to go to a sporting event and not get some treats not going to get a basketball game and not get a loaf of italian red what are you fucking stupid they got the best they got the best pies there they really do and the chocolate chip cookies that are nice and big yeah they're a lot good stuff i see people are already where we got mimosa flights yeah of course rob's two meals in already probably he's eating

he's stopped at macdonald's on the way one thing about what what are they serving is it brunch in a box is that what it's called? Yeah, that's what he's got. Saus and bagel sandwich. They got a ton of stuff. They got the Mimosa flight. One thing about the show, fam, we're drinking at 6 a.m. Yeah, we're drinking at 6 a.m. Ho, ho! Ho! It's Festivus with a show. Live from Lock One Distilling. Yeah. And K Rock.

Hey, ahoy, ho, happy Festivis, everybody. Two thousand and twenty-five. Rapping it up. Rapping up our big year here at Lock one distilling in Phoenix, New York. Oh, a couple of guys with six-seven necklaces. Oh, no, we deal. We're just hip-cooled teens. Oh, I mean, wicked-hook-cooled teens.

My kids are going to think I'm so cool. I mean. So cool, man. Mm-hmm. Of course, we are going to be reading your grievances throughout the morning. 315-364-109 is the K-Rock text line. Everybody who wears a grievance will be eligible to win some lights on the lake tickets. I'll be texting those people back later on today.

with some tickets and information. And we know which of you here today came from that direction and looked at the light, so we're going around to collect our $10. You'll be collecting your $10. Thank you. That goes unnoticed. If you are in our Twitch chat,

you can see Twitch.tv. slash K-RocC-N-Y. You can see we are dressed in Ebenezer Scrooge this year as we are ready for a long winter's nap. Yes. On that channel, you can also see a gentleman successfully smoked cannabis out of a fruit cane. I mean...

That was impressive. It was a pretty big. achievement. I've had some big achievements in my life, but these last few months smoking out of weird objects. Pumpkins, cranberry sauce, and then the bonus for boss lady. Right. Was the Christmas tree, the little Debbie snack? That worked better than every one of them so far. It was so weird. Yeah, I shoved that in the freezer after I burrowed a little, a little hole in the top and then went through the bottom to, you know, they connected. But for some reason, that hit like a champ. Well, you said it tasted good. And it did. And it tasted like the little Debbie Christmas tree snack. That's awesome.

If you're ever in a pinch, I guess. I tuned in late, just as Joe was rating you from his stream, just Joe Syracuse on Twitch, he was rating you, and you people were in the chat saying he's so lit up, he's so high right now. I was like, oh, no, what did the fruit cake do? Did it hit hard? No, it was just good. I mean, it was just, I mean, Cocoa Puffs.

Yeah, so yeah, that, yeah, all at that. You had a good smoke. Oh, yeah. No, I can't believe it worked. Although freezing it almost backfired the fruit cake. Because you said it was going to crack? Because it started to crack. And it crumbled where, like, the mouth hole was.

It's not a perfect science. You'll get there, bud. You'll figure it out. What about that other thing that you can get around this time of here, that cake that's in a box? Oh, like that. What is it? I can't, I know what you're thinking of it. You know, but it looks like a bunt cake, but it's not.

What is it? It's in a big yellow box. Listen to her. Panetone. Yeah. Thank you. That one's big. That one's big.

I was going to do a ginger. bread house but it's a lot of chimney right you'd have to build one you'd have to build a whole gingerbread house i have one of those kits at the house or i was going to buy one and do it but i was like i don't know if i'm skilled enough and i don't want everyone to make fun of me if my gingerbread house collapses you could put a small bong in the chimney well let's remember that god willing we still have a cocoa puffs a year from now that will be next year next year's goal one year from now we will smoke out of a gingerbread house They did say, as Instacart has released some of their data for the holiday shopping, fruitcake obviously sees a spike this time of year.

That's, it was gross. Is it gross? I don't think I've ever had. I've never eaten a fruit cake. I tried a chunk of it, because I like those multicolored cherries. Are they marishina candy cherries or something? Hey, these are green. Don't ask questions.

Yeah. And it was, it was weird. I don't know what the, like, combining agent is, but it sure as hell isn't cake. Do they press that, like in one of those compactors? They absolutely do. You can just tell. It's just made in a mold and they flop it out. Does anybody like fruitcake?

No! There's like three people here that actually... There's a couple people. Because I was thinking... Someone's buying it? It was not like a Depression-era food, I'm sure. It probably comes from like, you know... Like mince meat.

Yeah, like it just was around and then it just never went away. The one that I bought, that one was not good. The other one that I saw at like the chopper and some of the grocery stores, that was like quadruple the price. Those ones were probably a little bit. better than the $3 I found. And I have a, I guess it's not a dumb question, but this is my question. Is

there cake in the fruit cake? That's what I'm saying. You don't know what the binding agent is? Yeah, when I tried it, I was like, I don't know what this is. I don't know what that is. So Instacart looked at their sales data from the holiday season. Obviously fruit cake has it a spike. Gingerbread

Cookies has a spike. Yeah, that's where it's at. But the biggest spike comes from eggnog. Is people... Yeah, I can test for that. The nog. I don't, I don't like eggnog. With booze or without booze. What does it say on there? Panic cake is made of a dried,

candied fruit, soaked in spirits. Yeah. That was not having any spirits. But what is the cake part? Anyway. It's sugar. So there's flour and sugar.

The states that love eggnog and the states that hate eggnog, Maine. The number one state. Ooh, is Maine? No. Oh, really? New Jersey. Number one state for Eggnog.

Like a gnaug. Number, the last state, the 50th state? Florida, they hate it. It's probably too hot. Yeah, you're not drinking eggnog in Florida, bro. No, we got to be on that list for tops. The way I watched you monsters buy eggnog by the case. Yeah, when we were at stewards, people were running in like addicts.

Like they had the shakes. They were running in and grabbing like two of the things. Go they got that nog? There's the egg nog and there's the holiday nog. What's the difference? There's a bunch. Are they different? I don't know.

I see eggnoggin and there's holiday not. There's just different flavors. I don't know what their differences are because I don't like it. It's all thick egg milk? My mom used to make it. Oh, how do you make it? You just crack a bunch of eggs and leave it? Yeah, in a blender.

Oh, really? Mm-hmm. And then you just kind of... I can taste it right now. You just kind of sip on it. So you're drinking raw eggs. Mix with sugar and stuff? Pretty much, yeah.

No. It's like almost... It sounds like you're making a cream of some kind. It's almost like you're making a meringue. Yeah, that's what it sounds. It's like, it's if you have a milkshake and you let it just melt and then they're like, yeah, but crack a couple eggs into that real quick. That's egg knock. No, thank you.

We never had the store bought. My mom's like, we got eggnog at home. I'll make it, Joseph. I will make us eggnog at home. But people love it, man. Watching how quick people buy it and the rate in which and how many varieties. I've just, oh my God. I don't like anything dairy anymore.

Like maybe ice cream. about it but i don't like milk i don't like really milk shakes very much anymore i don't like anything that it gives you the rumble guts yeah because you're rolling the dice with that with the dairy i don't know especially that where it's like oh you want to make it quicker to just shoot right through and it's already digested we'll get it right out of you what's the nog part of it like what is the nog i don't know oh i don't i'm so curious where does egg knock come from you don't trust me You don't want to know. I mean, I get the egg.

Don't add. Ah, from the word Noggin, which was a wooden cup back in the day. Because you ought to your head if you're drinking eggnog. Eggnog. Oh, I thought Nog was head. Medieval warm milk, milk drink with ale or wine. It came to colonial America, became a holiday tradition. Ew, they brought it over on ships.

The name Noggin is a wooden cup, and grog is strong liquor. Eggnog. Because they didn't want to throw it out. They were like, we brought it all the way over on the knee. Or they... We can't throw this away. Or they, like... They brought all this over, and they just see...

It'd be like me walking in and seeing you sipping on it. And I'm like, oh, yeah. That's a drink. That's right. Oh, the nog is gone bad. The nog is turned. Oh, geez. Dump it dovable.

Imagine it with beer in it, with ale? But like that timey ale. Not like good beer. No, like mead. Mead and gross old ale. Honey, we've not flamet outside in the woods. Live from... From lock one distilling on K Rock.

It's a Festivus miracle. It's Festivus with the show. Yes, it is, and yes, we are. Good morning. This is K. Rock. And we're about to have a feats of strength, but an entire table of stoner's just got up and went outside to probably smoke. I'm like, there's like 20 of them that just left the building.

There was time. It's 6.49. So if we call their number, they better get their ass back in here. It's time for our first feats of strength, Cody. Go to my sack and grab out three tickets. Can I have Josh's sack, please? Thank you. I can dug my hand in there.

Thank you so much. All right. All right. I need three players. Three contestants. Two. Everybody get your tickets out. Three times.

I've pulled numbers out of your sack. Go ahead. First contestants. One, two, eight, seven. One, two, eight, seven. One, two, eight, seven. is one two, eight, seven. One, two, eight, seven.

You just do the one hand. Do you know why six is afraid of seven? Seven, eight, nine. Out, out, out. Both. One, two, eight, seven. Do we have anybody? No, cool.

We'll come back. One, two, eight, five. One, two, eight five. One, two, eight five. We're going on all these people. All right. There's pink. Pink is coming up to the front.

I don't know if. Give me another number. One, two, eight, seven. 1, 287? 1, 287. Is any of the 12 people that went outside? 1, 287? 1, 283.

1, 283. 1, 283? You're 1, 287? I knew it. One of the stoners. Look, a little stoners doing the weed drugs. You're up here, where's pink? Pink is up here, too?

And then 1, 283. Is 1, 283 here? 1, 283. All right, pick another number. Pick another number. Save your smoke breaks for commercial. She'll break, Stoneers. Don't be lumping us all in.

You're a stoner now, too. 1-28-9. 1-28-9. All right. Come on up. We've got three contestants, and you're all competing for concert tickets. You'll get to choose. We have Evanescence, Guns and Roses, or Weird Al.

The winner of this contest, we'll get to pick the concert. They go to. I'm telling you, you got to go see Weird. Now, this is a fun game that we saw. Is it this one? It's this one. Oh, my God. Take you going to want that jacket off.

Nobody's wearing a skirt, right? Everybody's good? All right, good. Oh, they go outside that one? So, the way this is going to work is I'm going to hand each of you an adult diaper. Take this one right here. Take this one right here. Come on up here, Kay.

Oh, she is wearing a skirt. She is? Oh. Well, you got long. You got leggings on. It's up to you. You want to try to put on it. Yeah.

Here's how this is going to work. So. Pino pants is. is the coolest. For our first feet of strength, you're going to put the adult diaper around your ankles.

The first person to get it all the way up to your waist without using your hands will win a pair of tickets to a concert of your choice. I'm trying to figure out. So they can't use their hands. They've just got to keep. I've watched videos.

It is possible. I can't get it. This, okay, it is for concert tickets. Now, I don't want everybody to bump in this table, so kind of use this area out here. All right, this is really stupid, and I'm really excited about it. All right. Should we move the candles? Well, they got to be out that way a little bit.

Pink is big, too, so I don't want them to bump in anything. Oh, my God. On the count of three, please get your adult diaper from your ankles to your waist. In one, two, three, and they're off. Go ahead and they're okay. Oh, Kay's got it over her knee. Look at her go! Look at her go!

Look at her go! Oh, my God! Congratulations! That was incredible! That was incredible. You can keep your adult diaper. That is our gift to you. Yeah, there you go.

Now you got an adult diaper just for you. That was unreal. I've never seen anybody in all the videos I've watched do that. Did you know you had that skill? To put underpants out without your hands? Wow. Congratulations, Kay. That's a skill unlocked. I think that she had just leggings on.

Yeah. She is thin, so she has just move, she can just move like a tree squirrel. It was the perfect storm. It was the perfect storm. Congratulations, Kay. What's the concert? Boss lady, you'll get your info right now. Yeah, what concert are you going to go to?

The Weird Al show. That is the best pick. Good choice. Good choice, Cody. Best concert I've seen. How did that go for you? Listen, we'll play it again. It was, oh, okay, it was awesome.

However, I've never seen that tactic. So it was so quick. I was trying to watch everything. It was just like a long, lagging. Over the knee. Yeah, because that thing went up, and then you just kind of shimmy shim. Yeah, got it right up. I watched people doing that.

They were laying on couches. They were thrusting their body all over the place. Next round, they all got to lay on the ground. There's no way I would have gotten over my big size. No, I've never been able. You can't move my legs like that. Or I would have done, I would have looked over, seeing her doing that and then going, oh, that's how you do it, and go to do that.

And my hip pops out. I'm going to break a hip trying to put on an adult diaper. Fear not, the other contestants that we put back in the sack, the only one who can't play it to win against is Kay. So she is our first winner. The mimosas are flowing. What are you drinking? I don't know, an apple cinnamon one?

I didn't see the names of them all, but that's dull. You're getting a mamosa flight here at a second. It's a moose. Boosy Mamosa. Roofy. Oh, that makes more sense. Oh, it was handed to me. Who doth interrupt my libations?

I'll have my libations before I take a dip. Oh, and here comes your flight. Here comes your flight. Here comes your flight. Look at this. Big Nate, jump on that mic real quick. Let's talk about Lock One. Big Nate from Lock One.

I know how much you love to do interviews. You can get nice and close to that, Mike. So what is on the Mamosa flight? What is in this? I honestly don't know. I just work here. I don't know. I'm the salesman out of our time.

Yeah, all right, put them on the spot. I know there's, one of them has the peach excuse, or the pineapple excuse. Yeah. One has the inferno. Yep. I'm just guessing. Orange. I'm not sure with the other one.

I think it's just a regular. There's one. Blueberries in there, man. Sip it. This is the one that Fuzz let me try. This one I've had. This one is really good. So I'll let you do a little selling here.

I saw you're going around and sampling. You were sampling the candy. candy cane whiskey. Tell people what that is. That's a whiskey, right? Yeah, so it's a 60-proof whiskey. Just tastes like a candy cane. Yeah, it does. It's pretty easy going. You can drink it. On the rocks, you can mix it. You can put it into your coffee. You can put it into about anything. Yeah. Put it right into your gulet. Put it right in your mouth. Put it in your mouth. It is delicious. You can do it with the same way. I look for butterscotch. The butterscotch would go good on the pancakes, like straight up. I've done it. You and I talked about that a lot ago, and I've done it.

Yeah. It's really good. That's a great deal. I use that at events, and I tell people that. Pancakes. Goes really good in orange juice, too. Oh, that's a good idea, too. They got a lot of good stuff down here, Lock One Distilling. Any events coming up I want people to know about?

Not that I'm aware of it. All right, cool. Here we go. What do we got? This is the Mimosa Flight. Here we go. Here we go. Mango, excuse, ginger ale, champagne, and blueberries.

Okay. Coconut excuse, pineapple juice, grenadine, champagne, and a fruit skewer. Yep. Inferno, 71, Apple, Apple, Champagne, cinnamon sugar rim, and then pineapple, excuse, orange juice, champagne, and orange slices. Your excuses are your lighter liqueurs, kind of, right?

These are our vodka of liqueurs, yeah. They're a 60-proof vodka still, so you still get quite a bit. Okay. Awesome. And then tell people about the inferno, because I don't know how to be like that cinnamon whiskey. It's a whole lot better than the other cinnamon's sugar.

Yeah, I agree. It tastes more like a big rat chewing gum. Yeah. It tastes like real cinnamon and not like... Yeah. It's not as syrupy. No, not at all. It's real good.

It's more flavorful. And you have the higher proof one, right? Yeah, we have the 101 proof, which is my personal favorite. Yeah, same. Out of everything they're made. I like it. That'll get you through this winner. I love it.

Thank you, big mate from Lock One, everybody. Big name, everybody. Thanks, buddy. So I've got to air some grievances here as part of the festivist celebration is airing the grievances. We are here at Lock One Distilling in Phoenix, New York. And I've had you guys submitting them. You're posting them on our Facebook page, and I'll read through some of them. Now, William,

says the new point system in New York. I got a point on my license for having a ball blown? I saw that yesterday. Is that for real? Your bulb or your ball? Your bulb? He says that a bulb out of my vehicle.

That's for, they're just going to give you a point. That's messed up, dude. Can I fight that? I can see that if you are like, if it's like, yeah, you know what? I pulled you over 10 times this month and you still haven't had that headlight fix.

Yeah, usually had, you had like 10 days. Like the fix it ticket or whatever. That sucks. That one. The point system, like, it got crazy all of a sudden. Like, everything doubled. Yeah, you'll get points for everything. I don't mess with that, man.

If I get any kind of speeding tickets, and I shouldn't, I lawyer up because I don't want the points on there. Nicole says, and this is, ooh, a romantic one. He waited over three years to tell me he loved me, and by the time he did, I'd lost feelings for him. Wow. Well, dude, you got to step up, man. You got to step up. She also complains that she feels. like the little Debbie Christmas trees are smaller this year.

Do you have that? Do you think that's true? Yes. If they seem smaller? Because what I have, because I have tiny, tiny little hands. You have big man hands. Stop it. No, it's okay. There's you big man grips.

All right. But no, so when I took out the little, the little Debbie cake yesterday, I was like, this shouldn't feel small in my hands. Yeah, it's shrinkflation, bro. It seemed like they used to be able to kind of fit, and then you do like the little hand sign here. Now, man, it was small. Yeah.

It was not much bigger than this water smoking tobacco pipe. Yeah, it wasn't that much bigger than that. Well, all of them changed over the years. Very weird. Nick, his grievances, the South Bay Bridge being closed all summer and fall, Cicero traffic and construction in there as well. A lot of road construction grievances. I can't believe that area.

I'm so glad I don't live over there. It's as much as I complain about. Wait until they rip apart the city. Everything. People want to, people want to, complaining about the South Bay Bridge. Wait until they get right into the city. Yep.

And then rip 81 down. Like I always say, we better have the best roads in the history of roads after this. Our roads better be top roads. They better study our roads because of how they better say, wow, central New York has the most beautiful construction ever. I also, with the roads, it's like what you always say, wait until they realize that all of downtown's roads are going to be crumbling into each other sooner than later. Oh, it's all falling apart. We're airing grievances. is Allison says, I have a grievance.

You need a boating license in the state of New York now? Did you not need a boating license before? No. No. All she needed is a driver's license. Oh, well, she's mad about that. Oh, I used to need a boater's safety course. I did that.

Yeah, you have to do that. I have that. Like, if I go through my weird wallet of, like, things that I probably will need, but who knows what, my boater's certificate ID is in there, because I don't know. If you are a boater, stop at lock one. Anytime you're here on the Oswego Canal. Oh, that's cool. Right here on the river.

Samantha says, I think the thing that pissed me off the most in 2025 is getting into my first car accident. Somebody ran a red light. After four weeks in the shop, I get my car back only to be rear-ended again. Oh, and not in the good way. Not in the good way, Samantha. Not in the good way. That's a sign that that car has got a. That's a jinxed car.

Yes, that's haunted. It's got a ghost in it. It's a devil car. Bill says people that drive with their high beam. on 24-7. Bill, sometimes those are just normal headlights. The headlights have gotten stupid bright. I don't like the ones that are automatic

and they decide when, don't worry, I will turn on and off when I see fit and they'll come at you and it's like 20 feet in front of me is not the time to turn them off. Mine's pretty good. I already can't see. You have good ones? Yeah. Just straight up, F-cancer from Fuzz.

We agree. F-C cancer. Aff-its. F-its. Go to the tax line. I'm so sick at construction. My, my grievances that people refer to me by my real name instead of chicken wing.

I get a chicken wing if you're a check. Yeah, chicken wing. What the hell? Pat Lucas says, the Colts, start the season with zero hopes for success. Then Indianapolis Jones pulls an ace, and they go seven and one, win in Germany, and then have a nice four-game losing streak. Jones goes down, and now we're relying on Old Man Rivers.

What is this? season. My Sundays have been insane. Next, I get to watch the Colts play the 49ers with Grandpa under center. They also forgot to mention trading a bunch of their first round picks for Sauce Gardner and that after a game, he blows

out his ACL or whatever he did. Two games after two games. Two games. You can't complain that like it hasn't been an entertaining season. It's been crazy. But when you have that hope and then all of a sudden you're like I get it. So, oh, so close.

I'm a Dolphins fan. And it's gone. And it's gone. And it's gone. My grievance for 2025 is my husband being unemployed for four weeks during the holiday season, should have started a new job in November, got the offer letter, the picture taken for the badge and everything, gave two weeks notice, and then his employer rescinded the job up. That has to be illegal, right?

You can't do that. I don't know how that works. That's no takebacks. Yeah, no takes these backsies. No takes these backsies. That's the problem. Did you sign the no takes these backseys clause? If you didn't,

also I don't have it in front of me, but I did see somebody's grievance that their boss just built a $5 million mansion in Florida and denied their $2 an hour raise. Oh, well, I mean, you know. Well, listen, got to have mansions. Our boss has got to have mansion. Got to get their mansions. National Grid saying, hey, we're putting a huge expansion on our building,

and my bill went up doubled. Yes, it did, buddy. Yeah, a lot of National Grid hate in the chat as well. Dude, unreal. airing your grievances, we are here at Festivis at Lock One Distilling in Phoenix, New York. Hey-oh, make noise! Keep it a lock. It's K-Rock.

Make noise. Lock-1 Distilling Company's liquid candy cane peppermint whiskey is a delightful fusion of sweet and minty flavors reminiscent of the classic holiday candy. It offers a tantalizing blend of smooth whiskey infused with the refreshing essence of peppermint, creating a warm sensation with each sip. And the sweetness of the candy cane gives it a festive touch. Lock One Distilling Company's liquid candy cane. Ask for it by name at your favorite liquor store. Try a free sample at our tasting room in Phoenix, New York, or order online, L1DC.com. Merry Christmas.

Ho, ho, ho! It's Festivus with a show. Live from Lock One Distilling. Yeah. And K Rock. Yes, it is, and yes we are. We are here in Phoenix, New York. Yes.

My opinion, the best Festiv ever, because I'll be home in five. No, dude. I thought about the years that we're like, we're all the way like up at the Woodland Brewery. We've been to Rome. We've been all over. We're going to need you, though. We've got to have you head on out to, uh, up near, like, Redfield, just real quick. Just I got to get the Boonville.

Yep, we just got to have you drop something off real quick. We need a quick photo op. Oh, we got old school high to peanut pie. Hi, peanut pie. Happy Fest of us to peanut pie. Even though she's 12. That's, and probably a foot taller than me. At this point, I would imagine.

She's as tall as you. Yeah. Yeah. They're sprouting up, bud. I think both of my kids, you'll see on Christmas Eve or taller than you now, for sure. It was close enough last Christmas. I'd imagine now. If you're not watching, jumping our Twitch feed as we are dressed as Ebenezer Scrooge this year with a lot of accessories being added.

I've got my six-seven necklace. Oh, yeah. I took my off of us. I like that I'm the only one of us. It's not a wicked nerd. It could wear the fake glasses because I don't have to wear my real glasses like a nerd. That's a good look for you, though. I have real glasses.

in my bag, I'm just not aware. He never wears it. He has glass. You should get those type of frames, though. Right, they are. They're not bad. Old-timey gold friends. That's coming back.

That look is coming back. That's the math teacher, dad. Yeah, like the serial killer glasses. Like, hipsters are wearing them. You're real pretty there. I like your fanny. Hey, are you 18 yet? I knew your mom back in the day.

Let's give away some good, good, Cody. Let's give away a smoking accessory from our friends at East Coast. Emroll. Dragon Egg. Wow. What is that thing? Dragon egg. Okay, Dragon Egg.

I've shown this on Coco Popes a couple times. It's just a real fun piece. That is beautiful. They got a bunch of crazy ish over there, man. You can smoke tobacco out of that for sure. Oh, man, the amount of tobacco that you can put in here for hook of fun. Everybody get out of your tickets right now so we don't waste time. Everybody get out of your tickets right now.

Coco, give ahead the number. One, two, nine, three. One, two, nine, three. One, two, nine, three. One, two, there is Reader. Big stoner. Big stoner.

Absolutely huge stoner back there. Yep. He's going to get a lot of use out of that. Congratulations, Reader. Enjoy that. And there you go, sir. Thank you. Don't use it all in one place.

You drive it on the throughway hitting that thing. Sometimes you click a story that bums you out. Like, you always thought Christmas shoes was the most. bummer Christmas song. There's a couple, now that I've been listening to the channels that they have to play 80,000 Christmas songs, there's some different ones, but I don't know if I've heard one. There's worse than that. Well, when you know the story behind it.

Oh, I, like Christmas shoes is straight up. Yeah, my mom's dad, here's the shoes. Yeah, there's another one called a different kind of Christmas that I learned for a house party years ago because her son had just passed away. I heard that one. And then I played it at the point. party and halfway through the song, the entire house was just losing it. Everybody just stares at you.

And I'm just like, what am I supposed to do you right now? I get it. People need to grieve and stuff, but talk about a dead kid right into, hey, jiggity jakey-h-hi-hi-d Dominic the donkey. Well, this is, bring the room back up. Irving Berlin, who wrote like, God bless America and all these other hits, cheek to cheek. Oh, yeah.

You all right. I wrote White Christmas. I'm dreaming of white. Oh, no. And I always thought it was like, and it is about it. What, tell me the dark history of it. I got to go. I got to, sorry, I got to go.

It's going to bum me out. I'm down. Oh, no, I can't do my usual. What's that, mom? Okay, I'm going to because he's here. He's dreaming of a white Christmas that he used to know because his three-week-old son died on Christmas day. Jesus. Good God.

Merry Christmas. Happy holidays, folks. 1928, so every year on Christmas Day, he and his wife would go visit the baby's grave. Holiday tradition? I can't read stories on the internet, man. It just bubs me out. But now that we said that, I'm going to go home and I watch YouTube, and I always send you YouTube videos. Yeah.

And it always talks to the dark history. The dark history. Now you're going to find one on white Christmas. Oh, God. He wrote White Christmas to honor his child. I thought it was Bing Crosby. Well, Bing Crosby sang. He sang it.

You're trying to tell him. Bing Crosby ain't sitting around by the fire right in his own tones? Dancing around like Danny F and K, if you know what I'm talking about. It became an American favorite, even though the original radio version was lost in 1942. We've heard the Bing Crosby version forever. So there you go. There you go. The original.

Who sang? Somebody else sang the original? Oh, who sang it? Who sang it on the radio? This poor. Dude, I got it on bootleg, bro. This poor guy in his wife. wife has created this song as a sad tribute to their kids.

And now everyone's out like, uh, Oh, Merry Christmas, everybody. I love you guys. They're just like, Cover my baby's grave. Oh, exactly. Across the street at the cemetery. What a bummer.

They're singing our song. You couldn't smooth a so sheet if you had a hot date with a bake. It's Festivus with the show. I lost my train of thought. We're live from Lock One. Distilling on K Rock. The rain is coming down outside, but we're partying inside. Be careful on the roads, guys.

Holy cow, it's like a monsoon outside right now. It's going to be three different waves. I looked at the radar. Yeah, it's this front that's coming through. Unreal. It's like hurricane rain outside right now. They said high winds, it was too warm. All of a sudden it got too warm.

Yeah. That means a front's going to come through. That wind's going to blow, and then we're going to get the lake effect again. Yeah, all right. So be careful on the roads today, folks. But here at lock one, we are celebrating Festivis. We're good in here. We're nice and dry.

We've got our contestants for the Mitten Game, gentlemen. You're going to want to sit on the floor in kind of a circle here. This is my favor every year. Now, for those of you who are unfamiliar with the Mitten game, this is great help. It's quite simple. It's quite simple. All you got to do. All you got to do is unrap a present, boys.

It's all you got to do. That's easy. Ask Ligueli. He knows. Ask them. The problem is you're going to have these mittens on your hand. We can start with Kyle. Sure, go ahead.

Now, the person next in line, do you want to do one or two? Let's do two. Yeah, let's do two die. So the next person in line, you're just going to roll those dice until they land on 2K rocks, okay? That's when we'll stop and the gift will be rotated. You'll get the mittens and we'll go around the circle until someone gets the gift. Now, I don't know how many layers are on this. I paid a teenager to wrap this for me.

I believe they told me it was over 20. I think so. You're going to be here for a minute. It's like six or seven? Dad, it's like, I did like six. Seven. Right. 41.

So, whenever we are ready, I will start with Kyle. And the goal is to get to the center. There's a little stuffed animal sloth in there. If you get to the sloth, you get to pick concert tickets. We've got guns and roses. And Evanescence left. Okay. On the count of three, Kyle, you, yes, you have a question.

The rules are you can't use your mouth. You can't use your elbows. You can only use your hands. That one year. You can only use your hands with the mittens on them. I saw the trick to it that one year, so we got to see if anybody does it. No teeth, no elbows, no, you can't punch, no punching. Oh, okay, never mind.

That was the trick. What's that? Only hands, but I feel like you're trying to get something out of me. He's asking very pointed questions because he's got to play. We'll find out. We will find out. One layer at a time. one, two, three, begin.

We are playing the present game. We are rolling. He is attempting to roll. Does the K-Rock stickers count as doubles? Yes, you need to see two K-Rox inside. All right, we have moved on. Put on your mittens. I'm curious to what Kyle's approaches, because he seems like he has a plan.

He didn't have enough time that time around, but, oh, no faces, no faces, no mouths. No faces, no mouths. No faces, no mouths. And begin. And begin. All right. Okay, okay. Did we get a double already?

All right, then. I may need to make this a little harder. Maybe just the numbers. Well, we'll see. Because this may take a while. I can throw it. I have songs queued up so we can just watch on Twitch if we have to. And begin.

Go ahead. Oh, he's going to thumb it to death. He's trying to thumb it. No punching. You can thumb it. There we go. We got one layer through. He's just trying to thumb it open.

It's like my ninth grade dance all over again. You better not be thumbing in there, Cody. Oh, no, we're not thumbing. We're playing the present game right here on Twitch. dot TV slash K Rock C&Y. Josh makes me wear those mittens in the office when I'm scratching. Begin, go ahead. We are at least one layer down, potentially.

Oh, oh, oh, oh. No. Kyle, don't you worry about what the roller's doing. You keep going, but you've got to be on a goal here. And doubles. There we go. We'll stop right there. He's inside the box.

This has a big all morning. Well, I'm already seeing a box. So this is a good sign. And begin. Go ahead. We are rolling. All right. All right. The present game here. Rippet.

Our contestants are doing their best ticket. Doubles! All right. Alex, I'm going to throw to a song. If you want to keep watching the present game, get in Twitch.tv.com. C&Y as somebody is winning concert tickets. This is K. Rock.

That's Rise Against Making Christmas. Congratulations, Bill! He won. He won a little stuff sloth, and he's going to a concert. Bill, what concert are you going to? Guns and roses are evanescence. He's got to choose. Let's see.

Tough choice. He's got to look to the wife. What's the wife say? What's the wife say? Guns and roses or evanescence? Evan essence. I think does that one also include? Is it either spearbox? No, it's spirit boxes on that one.

Then that's worth it alone. I'm going to that show. I think Saratoga is the closest one for that one. That's worth it in itself. Yeah, that's going to be fantastic. What a morning. I'm sweating over here. Every year, no matter what the outfit is, it's just hot.

And poppy. And poppy. Congratulations. He's got his little stuff sloth. He's got his tickets to evanescence. What a feat of strength there. Now, again, I haven't wrapped it myself the last two years. I love it. I have the oldest do it.

That's my favorite. And they said, can I make it impossible? Yes. Well, what's your definition of a piece? I go, it's got to be winnable. No. Okay, but it can it be hard? Hard to win.

I go, yes, it can be hard to win. And it was. And it was. That was great, man. Very good. A lot of people reporting their lights are flickering. Yeah. There's some storms coming through.

We're good right here now. This is that wave in the middle of it. In Kirkville, they've had power go out a couple times. I had it this morning while I was in the shower. I was like, Joan. If we lose power at a festivist, that'll be a first. Yeah. Well, luckily we have candles.

Right? We are wild, hell. We have candles. Have you noticed how well they have burned? They're really good candles. And they're not like making. a mess either. No. No. They're not making a mess at all. No.

They're like, now it's jinks. Remember, what was the name of the candle company here in Syracuse? Will and Balmer? Oh, yeah. Oh, didn't your relative work there or somebody? The Will and Bar? Maybe. That was the one right there where the 81, they're putting an apartment. And the big candlestick was the... And you still be able to go over on

Park Street near the stadium and buy them back in the day, even though that factory was closed. Oh, that's cool. Yeah, that's a cool little landmark. I remember that. Will and Baum. We are here at Lockwood. We are Stilling in Phoenix, New York. You can air your grievances on the K-Rock. Tax line. What do we got?

I've got more and more people are driving in the passing lane instead of keeping right. Yes. When did the middle and the outside lane just like people, like, I'm going to stay over here. So you're saying left lane passing only and then you get right back over? Yeah, you're supposed to pass it. That's a law. I know. That's the passing.

But if you're going the fastest, this is a debate I get in. If I'm going the fastest, can I just sit there and go the fastest? Oh, okay. You want me to keep getting back over. Yeah, that's what I usually do. Just in case, because there's always going to be somebody that comes to work itself on you. Unless you're doing like a buck 20. Yeah.

Okay. No, I noticed that. Even if it's like two lanes, still like, if I'm on the left, that means I'm going a little quicker. Scoot over, bud. Scoot you over, grandpa. All right. Go to go through real quick. Good morning show.

I would like to grieve being exposed to that terrible Ninja Turtle holiday special. What a cash grab? Oh, cash grab. What is that? Cash grab. We played yesterday on our show. Apparently, there was a teenage mutant. Ninja Turtles holiday special that was

it looks bootleg like it's called Have a we wish you a turtle Christmas it's on YouTube it's free The characters look off The like the songs are some of the worst songs you've ever heard And they have the weirdest Like the faces are weird Jamaican accent But then they forget But then they're like it's actually really New York City

But then they'll go buddy it's also like this Yeah When they're wearing black shoes. Yeah, they don't have turtle feet. The whole turtle can make it. And then they have blacks. It made me think, did you see the E.T. thing they just did? No, what's that?

You didn't see. Spielberg was involved in it. Oh, the movie, Disclosure Day? I watched that like five times already. That trailer is so scary and good. No, no, no, no, no. What are you saying? Like, ET comes back to Earth, visits Elliot and his kids.

The kids are in the backyard. Was it a Super Bowl commercial or something? No, it's like a movie? The ET sequel. I want to see it easy. Hold on. Are you tricked by some AI? No, no, no.

This was literally done by Spielberg. It has the real ET. It has Elliott. He shows up in the backyard, and the kids are like, what? And then Elliot runs out, and he goes, Elliot. I don't know. I haven't seen that. Was he tricked by AI?

He said it's real. No, no, no, no. It was on the legit stuff. Let me see. I'd say it right there. What? Oh, it's a full. Four minute.

No, that's not it. Infinity holiday commercial from 2019 featured. Oh, it's from 2019? A holiday reunion where he does come back, but it's a commercial. So you did see it real. It is real. Why did I just see it now? They're probably just plain because it's holidays maybe.

It's really cool. But I don't even remember that. I didn't until a couple weeks ago when somebody sent it to me. I'm like, what is this? Cody, let's do a giveaway. Let's give away Mama Max Prize bag. Mom and Bradford! It's a this thing?

This and this. They're real gift. This is silly, right? These are real? Nope, this is a legit thing. Deb just had stuff she wanted to give away to the show, fam, so... She likes to give stuff away. Go ahead.

She gave me... Full disclosure here, where is it? She gave me a gift. And... He almost ate dog treats. I almost ate dog treats because... He almost ate dog treats, guys. It looked like beef jerky.

Why don't you just try it? And I went to go eat one, and she goes... Take a bite. She goes, that's for the dog. And I go, I don't, oh, are they the rawhide ones? They're jerky sticks with chicken. Dude, it's going to just taste like a boil burble. Let me see.

It's the holidays, right? It's the rawhide. You can't. I can't bite into it. No, they're the rawhide ones. You won't be able to do. Yeah, sorry, bud. I'm going to break my teeth.

Yeah, no, those are for chewing. How's the taste? Chickeny. Here you go. You get the other end. Yeah, I'm good with that. Thanks, though, guys. Actually, not a bad.

Not bad. Not great. I'm not going to eat that. But that's not great. All right. I hope someone got a picture of that. It's on a camera. All right, we got to pick a winner, Cody.

Pick a winner. Like, I've never put a dog treat in my mouth before or with another man. No. I had an offense alignment on my football team in college that used to eat just like the dog biscuits. He eats the dog biscuits. I do. I was going to say, show this or set in here. But depending on the biscuit, I'll try most things before I give it, Elsa.

Yeah, just a little nibble. Just to see. There's really no flavor to that. I've never, that's like, no, because most dog things, they just, they don't include things. Yeah. Yeah. It's usually just crude. That's why he did it because he's like, well, you get a certain kind of protein.

And that was long before all the stuff that we have with, you know, sports supplements now. All right. Go ahead. Mama Mac. He also took a lot of steroids. One, two, nine, two. One, two, nine, two. Moons.

That was a setup. That's hilarious. We're eating, we're drinking, we're party, and we're having a great time. Oh, yeah. And I did just find out it's national emo day, so I'll do an emo house party tonight at 7 o'clock. Whatever, maybe I don't even care if I do. If you guys want to listen to some tunes tonight at 7 o'clock, I'll jump back on our Twitch channel. I don't even like tunes.

I don't even like music. Who even cares about that? Lock one distilling in Phoenix, New York. Let's not forget that you. You can drink here live, but all those bottles are for sale, if you're looking to get some gifts, you want to buy some goodies. Stocking stuffers, a host gift if you're going over to someone's house. Or to keep this party going late for your show. Tonight, get a bottle and drink with me tonight at 7 o'clock on Twitch.

And they've got America's favorite whiskey weekday whiskey on the shelf over there. This is the river that I throw it into when I throw it into the river. That's the river water I used to make it. See? Silover? Filtered river rod. I used, no, I don't filter. No, no, no, no.

It gives it a straight. That is pure, pure Oswego River. He doesn't, he doesn't even have to bribe it. It's so, it's so good. It comes out of that color and everything. It's got a grit to it.

It's got a nice, like a grit from the salt on the roads. Take one of the concrete bricks from somewhere here and we filter it through. It's pretty top of. It's the whiskey that bites back. Not to steal from barks, but it's a... Yes, yes.

Get yourself something. Guys, it is time to open some presents, I think. So... Yay, let's go on the presents. Here's how we're going to do this, so it doesn't get too crazy. We'll just kind of go in small groups. It's the dollar store gift exchange.

People have brought gifts. They purchased either at the dollar store for it, whatever, whatever silly gimmick you guys did to buy your gifts. So I guess if you bought a gift, it is now your time to open a gift. So stand up and kind of head to the front here. start right over here.

Tell me when. Say right where it was? Right where it was. Yeah, right there. All right there. Right there, and we will, Pat Lucas step up. You're an old pro at this. There you go.

Pat Lucas opening his gift from the dollar store. What do you got there, bud? Well, it's a Charlie Brown. But it's a little light. It's a little light for a wine box, I think. Yeah. Oh my God. That was a big one.

That was a big one. It's a dancing cactus. Oh. That's fancy. Maybe your voice. Here, I'll take the paper so it doesn't catch on fire. Thank you, Pat Lucas. Can I say that this show has ruined my family holidays, and I'll tell you why?

Because I have this tick now. Whenever anybody opens a gift, I clap, and I can't. I can't, like, in my home. No, yeah. Like somebody opened it, I go, all right. And my wife's like, why are you clapping? I go, I don't know. It's a thing.

Can't help it. What do we got there? Get on that microphone. Everybody has to talk into the microphone, by the way. Yeah, you have to. I'm sorry. Tabletop arcade game? It's the other thing.

What's the thing? Multiplayer basketball? Oh, that's a good one. And in all these bad. And in all these bad. I mean, that's pretty much the gift in itself. That's a hot gift. Congratulations.

That's the gift that just keeps going to say. Maybe we put the candle on the other side for that. Go ahead there. What do we got for your gift? You can start opening before you step to the mic. But not too early. Not too early. Himalayan.

Starlight projector. Oh, those are fun. It's for sleepy time. That's an old school shirt. Thank you so much. Congratulations. That shirt, that was when you did your old stuff. Now, this, this is a cash bag.

Cash grab. This shows for jobs. What do we got, Fuzz? Squeeze. Squeeze, sorry. Northern Lights projector. I'm telling you guys. Yeah.

I'm telling you, get real stoned and look at these projectors. Yeah, those are so cool. It's my favorite pastime. Look at the world. All right. Miss Pink. Miss Pink. What's got, Miss Pink? Life Save.

Oh, Life Save. Oh, Life's a butter rum in there? Is the butter rum in it still? Uh, no. What? I found it last year, though, when we went to Boston. So they have the butter rum. It's hard to find.

Yeah. Congratulations. Thank you. All right, Pink, you're up. Pink. I have a bubble blowing same. All right. For those of you listening.

Bubble butt. It's somebody found a Santa Claus that bends over and blows bubbles out of it. Out of his. Fannie. I like that. That's hilarious. And just so I can tell Khan back in the studio, as people have been drinking, the dump buttons are the two buttons on the top of the board right there.

Those are the two dump buttons. I got a stool? And stool softener. Oh, my God, but wait a minute. Is that from Squeeze? Did Squeeze make that? That is the second year in a row. You picked the squeeze game.

That's crazy. That's exciting. That's the universe. And it's squeaks. Stool and stool softener. That's so great. What are we? Oh,

welcome, Matt. Okay. Welcome. I like that. Thank you for coming. Thank you for coming. Enjoy your welcome, Matt. That's hilarious.

That's a good gift. Okay. What do we got here? Hey, guys. How you doing? Good. Oh, Antler toss game. Oh, it's a, it's a blow-up antlers you put on your head.

We'll play later. Let's get that fired up over there. There you go. X-Lex. Oh, congratulations. All right. Now, you did win concert tickets and a little stuffy sloth.

So that's pretty good. That's pretty good. But, all right. Has everybody ever used X-Lax? I mean, like us, have you used it? No, I never needed it. My mom had to give me something when I was younger. The suppository up there, Bob?

Because me and my best friend were swallowing gum for like a week. Joseph. Joseph. I got clapping hands. Clapping hands. and uh whiz. Hashi horn. Oh, it's okay.

One more thing here that I can't get open. Man, I need those gloves. I know. They can only open something. He can thumb him. Thumb him. Oh, what are they? Are they mittens?

Are they gloves? I was saying he just got gloves. You won mittens. This is a simulation. Wow, that's weird. Weird. All right, Joe, what are we got? The Matrix.

It looks like nuts, but it's not. Peanuts. Peanuts. The Peanuts characters. That's a good gift. Wait, did you see, what did you see? What did you say, peanuts on? Pop rocks and some nerds.

Some nerd clusters. Wow, that's a whole bag of stuff. And pocky sticks. Those are good. Nice. Those are good. Newly engaged. She got engaged this week.

Congratulations. Kyle is engaged. Can you play the ukulele? I got a ukulele. Can you play? You don't want to play it? I don't, but I'll learn. Can you learn in time for your wedding, please?

We'd like to see footage of that. Thank you. You should come down the aisle playing the ukulele. Congratulations. Thank you. Thank you. You can teacher. I would.

Yeah, that'd be awesome. What do we got, Kyle? I got a slot machine piggy bank. Oh, that's a good. I dig it. I dig it. Oh, congratulations. All right, next up.

Who's present? Next up, it looks nuts. I got mixed nuts. Mixed nuts. Got a big old thing. Nuts. Okay. Okay.

What is that that you're drinking? What is that beverage? Here, get up to the microphone. That's the boozy butter beer. Oh, that's good. That's also one of your nicknames. That's what I'm going to say it. That's what I call Cody.

The boozy butter beer. We're doing the dollar store gift exchange. What are we from? So we got dove. Dub chocolate. All sorts of dub stuff. Lots of dub stuff. A lot of candy.

They also make soap. See. It's a nourishment creed. Oh, nourish me creed. Not for eating. Not for eating. For your fosh. Under ice, your room, it's a bunch of like,

Not under eye care. Good. We'll enjoy that. Congratulations. Oh, and a candle. It's a little spy on the bag. I'm wearing under eye serum. Are you really?

That's part of my morning face routine. Oh, very nice. Maloy. What did you get? Three bone. What'd you get day? Hi, everyone. Hi.

Hello. Hey, Rob. Oh, oh. Your mom says hi. Yeah. Boom. Burn. Boom.

That's a good one, Andy. What? Got toilet brush. Toil brush. It's the gift that keeps on giving, Malloy. Toil brush. You're going to use that all year long, bud. It's a gift that keeps on giving.

Hi, guys. Hi, Fuzz. A dinosaur chompers. What is it? Oh, it's like. Hungry, hungry hippos. It's the rip-off of Hungry-Hungry Hi, Hibbos. Congratulations.

I like that they're like, what's a name that would. The off-Brandt. That just rolls off your tongue. Like, hungry, hungry-hug-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-bom. Chompin. Hi, Jess. What do we got? Hi.

I got an earth bomb. It's literally an F-bomb. It's literally an F-Bomb. Is that another fuzz? Is it Irons? Is that candy cane and came? You did that? Yeah, M&M's.

Oh, that's nice. My grandmother used to give me an ad. Those were the top. That's like, the top. It's a crochet that you made. It's called crochet. Oh, I've got a lot of crochet showgirls. We have talented show fan.

They're all so talented. What do you got there, bud? I got a fart machine. Yes. Perfect. I got a fart machine too. Hi. Hi, everybody.

All right, what we got? Ronda. Come on, Rhonda. What's up? What do you got in there? What do you got? Other than it buys. Hot dog rolls?

All right. Hot dog rolls. And what is? I hope there's hot dogs in there. Hopefully you got some weaners in there. Did you get some weaners? Hey! It's all part.

Weeners. Hot dogs and buns. Congratulations. I heard Inks Ma got a similar gift earlier. Congratulations. Next up, what do we got? Cuttingbor. Dear Santa, before I explain how much do you know.

Ah, he knows it all. He knows he sees you when you're sleeping. He sees you when you're awake. He knows when you're awake. He knows you when you're sitting in here. Oh, wait, wait, wait, stop everything. Did someone let a skunk in here? It's getting skunky in here.

Did someone let a skunk in? All right, Rob, what do you got, bud? One that knows more than anybody, not to swear. Real nice. Thank you, dump. Rob, real nice. Can you please? I can't.

I can't take him anyway. I try. We're on the air right here. Alex, you got it. All right. All right, what we got. All right, what we got. Woo, Shetty!

Don't, that's not for Rob. Those are not for Rob. Yeah. Oh, these are for me. Thank you. Good job. That's fun. Awesome.

Awesome. Oh, he's got a kilt. I didn't even see the badass kilt. T.P. Toilet paper, but it's crossword. Crossword. That's hilarious. Something to do while you're there.

Something to do you there. That could take a while. We got one last gift. We got one last gift. Here we go. Oh, what? Oh, it's my paycheck. Oh, it's an envelope?

Hope? We'll see. Cash? I don't know what's in the somal of. That's very ominous. It's very ominous. Who's five dollars? Wait, there's one gift left.

Who brought one that didn't come up? Anybody? All right, Cody, oh. It's yours, Corey. Cody, open it up. You'll open it up for them. Go ahead. Okay, here.

All right. This is for you, fella. This isn't for me. I'm opening it for you. It's from Amazon. Jeez, there's all kinds of stuff. What is it? You got to open more.

I don't know. It's a random box. I have enough butt plugs. I know what a butt plug would look like. I've got mine in right now. I know what it is. Hold on. I'll show you.

It's Bluetooth enabled. I don't. There's so many. This is almost more ominous than the random $5 bill. It's like a guitar case. It's like a little mini violin or guitar case. What's in it? What's a little violin?

It's a mini. The mini violin to play people's sad songs. Wait. Oh, it's from Malloy. It's the world smallest violin. I feel like it works. I don't know what it's going to make. So this is whoever didn't want to come up.

Here is your violin. But there's a charger with it. Another successful, because it probably plays like a little. Oh, no, no, no. Oh, it's a stand. Another successful dollar store exchange. With the exception of Rob, who doesn't know how to be on the radio for Christ's sake. Jesus.

This many years. I can't even believe it. What a morning it is Ben, boys. It's already 8.30. Festimus always flies by. I get the Christmas, like, SADS. Why? The closer it gets to nine.

Because it goes so fast. I know. And then it's over, and then we've got to look forward to next year. They're so pretty. It happens so quick. I know. I can't help it. I can't help.

I just give me seven minutes and we can do Festimus again. I'm sorry. Hold on. We are here at Lock One. Like I said, bottles are for sale. If you want to keep the party going after you leave today, you want to buy some gifts. You want to do some stocking stuffers. All of that.

And the best thing about it here is you can come in and the bottles are right there. Right there. Even if it's busy, just go there. You buy your bottles. Super easy. This is my first time seeing that barn. How cool. Yeah, we're going to be doing stuff over there.

Oh, I didn't even know. How did I miss that? I'm working with Stephen. We're going to be doing some stuff over there in 2020. Some hand stuff. I already did. Oh, together. We love it.

Sorry. We have some good ideas for that spot. Yeah. It's the new hot spot right here in Phoenix, bud. This is the new hot spot. That spot looks like it's going to be. lit. It's going to be lit up.

Yeah. Have you played in there yet? They've been doing bands in there. They just started the end of last year. I'm back here in March, I think. Okay, cool. Very cool. So I can't play the songs, but you'll know probably all of them.

As Ultimate Classic Rock has released, the best rock Christmas songs bracket. Oh. And they've got songs going head to head to declare the best rock Christmas song. All right. What are they? So I'll throw these at you. Okay. Wonderful Christmas Time by Paul McCartney.

The absolute worst song. ever made. I hate that song. Do most people hate that song? Wonderful Christmas time sucks, right? Yeah, it sucks. For someone who is one of the greatest songwriters at all time,

he wrote the worst song ever. Not even worst Christmas. For being the Beatles, they suck at Christmas songs. They really do. That one and the, Merry Christmas, Josh. Yeah.

I saw a guy, so this is Christmas, and what have you done? Every other line is, what have you done? What have you done? What have you done? All right.

So then it's automatically going to lose. to Little Drummer Boy, Bowie. Oh, yeah, classic. That one advances. All right. Run, Run, Rudolph, Chuck Berry. Hell yeah. Versus Father Christmas by the Kinks.

Ooh, I love Father Christmas, man. That's a tough matchup. That's a tough one. I'll hear that enough. I'm going to go to Chuck Barry one. I'll go to cause. I figured you'd do that, and I'll make Josh be the splitter. Yeah, you got to go.

Splitt it. Father Christmas. I'm going to choose Run, Run, Rudolph. I like that one. It is both good. You can't leave. Little St. Nick by the Beach Boys versus the Ramones, Merry X-Mis.

Ramones. Ramones. Ramones. Yeah, I like that one. That's a good one. Elvis Presley, Blue Christmas versus Elton John Step into Christmas. Oh, no. Wait.

I don't think it ever hurts. Step into Christmas. Oh, that's the name of that? Yeah. Oh, man. I didn't know what that was the name of it. That's my favorite Christmas song. So I have to go that one.

2,000 miles by the Pretenders versus X-Miss all over again. Tom Petty. Wait, are the Pretenders the 500? No, that was a proclaimers. I was going to say, they can't just, no, it's wrong about memorials with us. I'm not familiar with either of those. I can't make a decision on that. It's Christmas, Tom Petty is the one of those Christmas all over again.

Oh, what's the second one? I'm just going to pick Tom Petty based on names. I'm picking Tom Petty because I like Tom Petty. Yeah, yeah. Last Christmas by Wham versus Please Come Home for Christmas by the Eagles. I like it. Really? I love the Wham song. As much as you.

Last Christmas is one of my favorites. As much as you can't hear it, there's that game. Mm-hmm. I still like it the most. Remember how I told you my wife has a move, where if she doesn't like the Christmas song I'm playing, she just touches the screen. Like, there's just no, it's just. There's no nothing. So last night we're driving home, and I've got, it was a live stream, and Wham came on, and she goes,

Oh, really? She keeps touching the screen, and I go, it's a live stream. You can't skip the Wham. She got whammed. Joni Mitchell's River versus Dan Fogleberg's same old Langzine. I love. I like to say Follinger. I met my lover.

the grocery store. Oh, okay. That goes, that advances. And then Sucky John Lennon, Happy, Axemez versus Springsteen, Santa Claus coming down. I was wondering where, that's the number one overall seed, is it not? Springsteen advances. As much as I don't like it, I like that song.

How is Trans-Siberian orchestra? I don't know. They didn't make the list of the sign. You know what? They're in a league of their own. All right, so now we've got Chuck Barry's Run Run Rudolph versus Bowie and Crossby. These little drummer boy. These are classic rock.

Class rock. I would say Trans-Ebrer is more like murder. So now we've got Little Drum. Little Drummer Boy versus Run Run Run Rudolph. I got to advance little drummer boy. Who was the little drummer again? That's David Bowie and Crosby. I'm with that, too.

I'm with that. All right. Same Z's. We've got Merry Christmas by the Ramones. Advancing with a Blue Christmas versus Elvis Presley. Blue Christmas. Blue Christmas. Tom Petty versus Wham.

Wham. Wham advances. All right. Yeah, same for me. Wham. Dan Fogelberg versus Springsteen. Springsteen advances. All right.

So here's the final four. Final four. Okay. Blue Christmas versus David Bowie and Bing Crosby's little drummer boy. For me, it's Blue Christmas. That's tough. So we're going to make Josh split it, and you go the... I go Blue Christmas because I go Blue Christmas.

Oh, it's already two. What do you pick though? I would have... For my late nanny, I pick Elvis. Blue Christmas. Same. Same. That's my favorite.

We've got Wham versus Springsteen. Whoa, what a showdown. I like the Wham song better personally as well. Me too. You're picking Wham? He's knocked out number one overall seat. Wham advances. So Wham against?

Wham versus Blue Christmas, Elvis Presley. What do you guys think? Blue Christmas. Wham? Wow, it's split. Okay. My vote is Blue Christmas. What's yours?

I love both, but it's Blue Christmas. Blue Christmas. Ho, ho, ho. It's Fest of us with a show. Live from Lock One Distilling. Yeah. Rock. We are here at Lock One Distilling

in Phoenix, New York. Let's go. Pay for our final. Feet of strength here. I mean, jump on Twitch is, uh, I'll be back on Twitch tonight at 7 o'clock. Little emo house party for a national emo day. But right now you see three grown men with adult diapers around their ankles. Yeah, it happens.

Guys, guys. Don't worry. Because the goal is to get those up around your waist without using your hands. Whoever does it first is going to be. Going to see Guns and Roses with Public Enemy. Guns and Roses. Now, I'm going to count down from three, and you're going to go. Three, two, one, and they're off.

They're trying to get, I'll take your foot out of it. Now you've got to, no, now. Okay, yep, yep. I think that pants are actually a hindrance. I think my guy is. You got to remember what stickers did a little while ago and shimmy out them hips. My guy wanted to take his pants off, and I think that would have been a great approach. I don't know.

Like a out like this, like a... Yeah, there you go. There you go. There you go, Pat Lucas. There you go, Pat Lucas. There you go. Oh, he did a lunge. He got him twisted up, though.

He got him twisted up. They're going to get caught against are twisted. Oh, man, Lucas. Lay on the ground, maybe. Yeah, lay on the ground. Baby on the ground. Baby, like, oh, no. Oh, no.

I got a backup. Throw another diaper on him. Throw another diaper on him. All right. You're going to be sore, Pat. We'll come back after Flintstone cherry and let you know who. Did he win? Did he get it?

I don't know. He's getting pretty close as you can possibly get. Well, just get a little closer, Pat Lucas. Get a little to join. And that's a wrap here. Wow. Now, we got a giveaway. Wow.

Before we get out of here, we got some goodies to give away. Thank you to Scott over at East Coast Emerald. He is donating three bottles. These are from Scotty and East Coast. He's donating three bottles a weekday whiskey, America's favorite whiskey. Yeah, I didn't even huck those in the river, so that's good. I have signed three of those.

Go ahead and pull some names right there. He diminished the value. Oh, yeah. I signed them for you. That makes them less valuable. Go ahead. Tickets. Get your tickets out.

One, two, six, one. One, two, six, one. Pat Lucas. Congratulations. All right. Next up. Let me get in there. Let me get in the middle.

There's never going on there. One, two, six, five. Six, five. Six, five. One, two, six, five. Six, five. Yay! Awesome.

Congratulations. Okay, here we go. On our final giveaway. Last one. Let me get way in there. It's the last one. Let me get in there. Okay, here we go.

Here we go. Real deep. One, two, seven, eight. One, two, seven, eight. Seven, eight. One, two, seven, eight. Is there a one, two, seven eight? And big.

Babba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. You did it. Thank you, just, Joe, for joining us, as always. That was great. Thank you, Chief. engineer. Thank you, Alex, back in the studio. Thank you, Boss Lady, all of our co-workers that came down today. Thank you all of you for coming out to another festivist. Thank you. Lock One Distilling Company, Phoenix, New York. Come visit my town this winter, this summer. I would love it if you came up to Phoenix and visited Lock One Distilling.

Spent some time up here. I'll be back on Twitch at 7 o'clock tonight, folks. Do you want to party tonight? Maybe I'll just wear this to the house party tonight. Multiple costume changes. We thank you all for coming out. We love you so much. Thank you for a great year. See you in 2026. Radio World, you'll get the 90s at 9.

Keep it live. This is K. Rock.