The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast - #47: CALL-IN TIME: Shady Cheaters, Introverts vs. Extroverts, & Think Small to go Big

Episode Date: January 24, 2017

Taylor O'Conner aka "The Bare Naked Cucumber" & Mimi Evarts join Lauryn & Michael to take some listener calls. The group weigh-in on how to approach implementing an idea, tips for branding a blog, being authentic when creating a personal brand, and how to deal with a guy who is cheating on his wife when she has no clue. We also hear Taylor share a story about doing ballet when he was 8 years old and the 'Him & Her Tips of the Week' return. To connect with Lauryn click HERE To connect with Michael click HERE This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential Bombshell Body Guide and Meal plan.  tired of combating inflammation & bloat? Want to feel lighter and sexier? Check out lauryn’s latest 7 day meal plan. In this simple & super effective plan you’ll find: + tsc grocery list with every ingredient you need for the 7 days. + what the f*ck to do when you love carbs guide. + quick and delicious recipes: breakfast, snacks, lunch, dinner and dessert. You will also find 28 weeks worth of fat burning, muscle toning, 27 minute long, effective workouts you can do at home with no equipment. USE PROMO CODE: HIMANDHER at Checkout for 20% Off

This episode is brought to you by Zola. So if you guys follow along on the Skinny Confidential, you know that I am in love with Zola. It's basically a wedding registry, super efficient, really quick to use. I feel like you can just go on there and get someone a gift, beautifully laid out. We used it for our wedding registry and Michael even liked it. So what we did is we did a honeymoon fund so people could contribute to our honeymoon. And we did a colon cancer charity so people could go on there and also donate to the charity of choice,

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A very smart cookie and now lauren everts and michael bostick are bringing you along for the ride get ready for some major realness welcome to the skinny confidential him and her i'm gonna carry this entire show today because everyone is hungover so i will weather the storm for all of us and take us to the promised land oh my god ever see he got miked i'm actually not hungover i think i had about was it a solid 11 hours of sleep so you just look like trash for no reason all right you guys welcome back to the skinny confidential him and her podcast today we have a twist for you. We're taking Collins. We also have Taylor. Hey, I think everybody knows me. If not, I'm Taylor. And Mimi. Hi. And of course, yours truly. Michael Bostick.

So we're going to do something a little fun today. We just snapchatted a number. We've got all four of us here answering anything and everything. And it should get interesting. I think the call-ins last time went pretty well, if I'm not mistaken. Didn't they? So we have a new analogy that we go through with Taylor. And he's progressing in his dating world. And I say, listen, man, the hardest part is getting the intro and getting the welcome. Yeah, I'm open to it.

I'm open to the conversation, right? That's the hardest thing. But he's got that now, right? He's got his in. So I said, listen, man, she's inviting you in. She's got the door open. She's saying, come on in. I'm interested in having you over. And I'm just using the house as an analogy thing here. So anyways, I said, just play it cool, man. Just go in there. Taylor's way is to boot down the door, ride a motorcycle into the house, kick up mud everywhere, break all the furniture, break all the pottery, and then be surprised and shocked when he's asked out, to be thrown out.

I'm just an over-talker. I think an explanation of one word, when it works, I use 20, and I think that sometimes I dig my own grave. You know what else is really kind of creepy? When you take an Uber pool. So, yeah, we went out last night. Everyone's a little bit hungover today. And I said, Taylor, call us an Uber.

And he did the Uber pool. And we ended up driving around Hollywood for a while, carpooling, at like 3 in the morning. And the best part was he kind of had a miniature date, which we'll get into. And he invited the date back to our, all of our, the condo here. We're all going to go have drinks, but because he called the Uber pool, the girl got sick of waiting for him and left before we could get home. There's okay. There's a little bit more preemptive to that. So she actually called an Uber and I don't know if anyone else has had this ever happened to them.

So she called an Uber. I called an Uber. She got into our Uber and drove off. And then Michael and I got into her Uber thinking it was the other one that I called and they started driving in the wrong direction. So basically we stole someone else's Uber as driving down the road and then we end up stuck down West Hollywood sitting there.

It was interesting. And you know what was even more interesting is you made her wait at the condo and in the condo you had your blow-up mattress in the middle of the living room with clothes thrown everywhere and an old BLT half-eaten sandwich. Wait a minute, don't lie. That was not a good look. Don't lie. No, no, you ate that BLT. Lauren an old BLT half-eaten sandwich. Wait a minute.

Don't lie. I was not a good look. Don't lie. No, no. You ate that BLT. Lauren ate the BLT sandwich. I came home. All night I was thinking to myself, listen, you know when you go out and you're hungry,

but you're thinking to yourself, I know there's something in the fridge when I get home. So finally, there's light at the end of the tunnel. When you finish the race, there's a gold medal no matter what. And that was my BLT sandwich. So we're driving back in the Uber, passing all of these fast food restaurants. And I'm thinking to myself, it doesn't matter what I want. I know that I have a BLT home. Surprise.

You didn't. I walk in the door. Leave it to Lauren. Lo and behold, there is, it's the two pieces of bread and everything, all the fixings are gone. Yep. I don't, I didn't eat the bread. I feel good about that though, because I was drinking. I was having a little wine and I was like, you know what? I had some wine. I didn't eat the bread. I feel good about that, though, because I was drinking, I was having a little wine,

and I was like, you know what? I had some wine. I don't get the bread. Balance, right? At its finest. So we went last night to see the Bitch Bible,

Jackie Schimmel's live podcast. Where was it? It was at... I think it was the Felix? Yeah. St. Felix. St. Felix in Hollywood. We went to taste.

We had a burger. Taylor chugged an espresso martini, which was incredibly creepy. It was really good. It was incredibly creepy. I've never seen someone chug an espresso martini. Then we were off to the races and we went to see her podcast live, which was incredible.

I think the podcast will be up on iTunes. We met her grandma. She looks great. She looks really good. I'm saying damn, girl. up on iTunes and we met her grandma and she looks great. Yeah. She looks really good. I'm saying like, damn girl, let's not hit on people's grandmothers.

No, I'm just saying she is a very, very attractive lady. You are that age. You're really, he has no boundaries. You know, you want to hear something interesting.

You know what I discovered yesterday? So I have this, I've, I've suddenly realized that I, I, I like lollipops. I know that sounds weird because young kids eat lollies. Oh my gosh.

But we went to this store and there was a lollipop and I jammed like five of them in my pocket. And I realized there are some things, no matter what you say, when you have a lollipop in your mouth, it is creepy. A lollipop in a 30-year-old's mouth is incredibly creepy. A lot of things, Taylor. I cannot, I literally can't bring you anywhere. A lollipop in a 30-year-old's mouth is incredibly creepy. A lot of things Taylor does. I cannot. I literally can't bring you anywhere. We go. We're meeting with a big PR company.

And we're touring their office. And I just hear a rumbling in the corner. And you have their whole candy bowl completely dismantled with all of their candy and all this shit all over their nice coffee table. The secretary was sitting there like creepily looking over her desk like what the hell is this guy doing everyone in the office was staring you didn't even notice and i'm just sitting there looking at you like complete zero self awareness well they had the best lollipops at the bottom so i had to i had to literally take out probably a hundred bad ones to get to the good ones you got to work for the gold the creepiest

part of the whole thing though, is that you, while eating a lollipop, it fell out of your mouth onto their nice floor. So there was, it was actually into their carpet and I just didn't acknowledge it because everyone else acknowledged it. No, the worst part was when we got back to the house and he wasn't done,

but he set it down for later. You set it on a cap of a water bottle for later. So it wasn't touching the bottom. Oh yeah. Cause it's still good. Your date saw that too, along with your blow-up mattress oh yeah you're right i forgot i left it there yeah chic maybe that's why she left in such a hurry yeah don't blame her so yeah taylor was being extra creepy yesterday and what's super interesting is that he has been holding a camera which me and me have had to endure on michael michael's wearing a wire i'm wearing a wire i'm hot um

mike is hot and um yeah i'm having taylor document my every move our every move and yeah it's a little bit creepy i mean it's kind of weird when you walk into meetings and like you know people see a mic on you and we did a meeting last night and we walked into like a huge office building and people are like are you mik mic'd? Why is he filming you? Is he filming me? I'm like, well, don't worry. We'll take you out. Okay. But explain for people out there that are wondering what you're doing and why you're mic'd. I'm not quite sure what I'm doing yet, but I just want the footage. I'm not quite sure what we're going to do with it. We might do a YouTube channel.

I just want to basically document everything we're doing so we have it because there's a lot that goes on. And, you know, I'm not such a creative type. I'm not like creating video content, but just documenting where we're traveling, who we're meeting with, what we're doing, what we're working on, when we're podcasting, when we're whatever. I just think it's cool footage to have. Yeah, I'm not quite sure what we're going to do with it yet. We are really about bringing you guys behind the scenes and showing you what goes on behind the curtain. So I think that this is kind of an extension of that to just, you know, it's almost like a long-winded Snapchat. Unfortunately, Taylor has to carry a lumbering camera, so that kind of sucks.

But this should be interesting. I feel like we can do something with this, maybe like a 30-minute once a week YouTube channel. I don't know. We're kind of figuring it out. Yeah, or maybe we do nothing with it. But it's better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it. I think anybody who doubts it in the long run is going to look back and go, wait a second. It's funny because a lot of people go, when we try to tell them what we're doing with it,

you can tell they go, that doesn't make any sense. That sounds stupid. But once we actually put it out, I think everyone's going to change their tune and go, wow, that's actually really smart. So yeah, now's the day and age where I feel like if you're going to ever do in a

reality show, you produce your own reality show because you have full control. Yeah. And it's just, you know, I think it's like document don't create right now. Right? Like people want to see what's going on.

They want to see the real story. They want to see what's happening. Yeah. The facade see the real story. They want to see what's happening. Yeah, the facade's getting broken down. Normal media is so curated and big budget that I think what's interesting is people want to see what it is that you guys do behind the scenes. Because the places we went yesterday and in the next month and everything of where we're going to go and document, I think it's going to be really interesting for people to actually see that you guys do much more than really what everyone sees. Was the camera recording when Lauren was dismantling your BLT? No, it wasn't.

But was the camera recording when you told your story about ballet when you were eight? Taylor, has it been nicknamed now? I didn't bring that up. Wait, wait, wait. So you finally get a date last night, and you think, this will get her. I'm going to talk about when I was an eight-year-old ballet dancer. Yeah, so, no, Lauren, somehow, I didn't bring it up. Lauren brought it up, but I interjected and said, yeah.

Lauren was talking about how your sister was an amazing dancer, and you came in like you were jealous. I was like, wait a minute, I was an amazing dancer, too. I did ballet, too. Oh, I thought you were talking about me. Why would I be talking about you? I don't know. That's what I thought she said. You started talking about how you had pointe shoes.

No, no, I never did pointe. I did not. You almost did. Literally, I ran around. I did a couple jumps, and that was it. And they tried to get, maybe I did like a plie or two. That's what they were called. Okay, well, Taylor does this thing where he always tries to, like, fib about what actually

happens. So I'm going to drag this story out of him. So you ended up becoming the star of The Nutcracker. No, it's—so I don't know how many people actually know the story of The Nutcracker, but there are—I think there's three brothers that steal The Nutcracker, and they run around, and they're kind of—they're not the antagonists, but they kind of play some central role. I don't know, because there's no dialogue. It's just all dancing.

But I was – I think the guy's name was Finn, if I'm not mistaken. Or Finn or – I can't think of the name. I mean, you lost us on the story. But here's the thing. You told this girl that you were a ballet dancer named Finn. And for the rest of the night, everyone called you Finn. But you know what? Her response was so awesome.

Her response was, oh my God, I was rat number six in the Nutcracker. So I was Finn and she was rat number six. So you didn't just do a couple jumps. You were the star of a ballet production. And then you made her feel bad about being rat number six. No, I think rat number six gets more, I think Finn is downplayed and rat number six is more important. So before we get into the him and her tip of the

week, I am going to tell you guys all about Blue Apron. So if you've been following along on Snapchat, which I hope you have, at Michael Bostic, you will see that I have been cooking up a storm. I'm like a wizard in the kitchen now. And it's thanks to my new friends at Blue Apron. Blue Apron is the number one fresh ingredient and recipe delivery service in the country. It's their mission to make incredible home cooking accessible to everyone. Blue Apron achieves this

by supporting a more sustainable food system, setting the highest standards for ingredients and building a community of home chefs like yours truly. He literally thinks he's a chef with Blue Apron. You guys should see him. He's like chopping the split peas. He has his cayenne. Everything's over-exaggerative. Like if he has to like throw like a little pepper on like the steak, like it's absurd. I got a whole new like movement when I salt the meats and he's like that guy on Instagram. Yep. There's a guy on Instagram going viral

because he flips his wrist when he salts this food. Yeah. He flips his wrist. He loves Blue Apron because he literally thinks he's a chef. So thanks to Blue Apron for doing that for us. So the reason I'm especially into Blue Apron is because the beef, chicken, and pork come from responsibly raised animals. Very TSC. Some of the meals that I've been whipping up have been the spicy shrimp and Korean rice cakes with cabbage. Also, I've been whipping up some pork chops and garlic piccata with scallion rice and spinach. Lauren loves that one.

And the mushroom and chipotle pepper enchiladas with lime sour cream. Been killing it. Check out this week's menu and get your first three meals for free. With free shipping, just go to blueapron.com slash himandher. You will love how good it feels and tastes to create incredible home-cooked meals with Blue Apron, just like Michael does. That's blueapron.com slash him and her. Okay, so before we get into the break, I want to give you a him and her tip.

I'll start with mine. So my tip comes from Mimi, and I'm going to let her explain this, but basically she just taught me that for illuminating pretty skin, you should add gold eyeshadow to a highlighter or a Mac primer, right? Yeah. It's like you add it to like the liquid primer. So then you just put it in there and spray it on your face before and after. Love it. So you put your makeup on like your CC cream. Well, I do it before. Okay. Okay. So you prime with the gold glitter spray, you put your makeup on and then you do it again or no? Yeah. Okay. And what kind of gold eyeshadow? Like tell us more. I kind of like to use a

highlighter. That's what I was saying. You use a highlighter instead. How do you get the highlighter? Scrape some of it off. And then when you put it in liquid, it dissolves. Okay. So you're using the Mac primer. that's a spray. Yeah. And then you use What's Up by Benefit, which is one of our favorites. Yeah, but that's a cream highlighter, so I use the MAC powder highlighter. Got it. So the MAC-

You put a powder into the liquid. Okay. So the MAC powder highlighter into the MAC primer for a gold shiny finish that's kind of dewy. Some of you guys were asking about Mimi's skin on my Snapchat and then you asked me about mine and it's because we've been using this primer that Mimi created. So check it out, mix it up, do a little magic and your skin will be glowing and pretty. My tip's a little bit, it's not so in depth, right? It's just a simple one. A lot of times in life you get stuck, right? Whether you're a writer one. A lot of times in life, you get stuck, right? Whether

you're a writer, a creator, you're doing a business, you're in a relationship, whatever, you get stuck. And when you get stuck, you get really discouraged. And when you get discouraged, you quit or you give up and then you feel like a failure and that's not good. So what I find in life when I get stuck or when I'm in a rut is I kind of work backwards and I start listing the simplest of tasks. It could be something as simple as like write one idea down or write a thought down. Give yourself a task that is so easy to accomplish that you kind of start building yourself back up. A lot of times when people get stuck, they're thinking really, really big on how to get unstuck. And sometimes you have to think small. So my recommendation in

life when you get stuck is to think small and create really, really simple tasks because eventually after doing those simple tasks, they're turned into more important tasks, bigger tasks, harder tasks, and then you're unstuck. Good tip, honey. All right. With that, we're going to take a quick break. Taylor's going to go get me another coffee because my order is completely wrong and we will be back. Hi guys. It's Kelsey Knight from the Lady Gang podcast. Every Tuesday, my friends, Becca Tobin and Jack Vanek and I get drunk drinking mimosas, hang out with celebrities and talk about all things womanhood, ice cream binges, late night texts,-life crisis, and all the sex.

New episodes every Tuesday on iTunes or Podcast One. This is The Skinny Confidential, him and her. All right, we're back from the break. I got my coffee, and our first caller is Atsia from Philadelphia. Hi, this is the Him and Her podcast with Lauren and Michael. Hi. Hi. How are you?

Good. This is really surreal. It's so fun. We love it. So quick Snapchat. You really like got there quick. I love it. Yeah, thanks for calling in.

Sure. Thank you for doing this. This is pretty cool. You have Taylor and Mimi too. Hey, Atsia. I love your name. It's very strange. I don't mean strange. I mean, it's unique. Where is it cool. You have Taylor and Mimi too. Hey, Atsia. I love your name. It's very strange. I don't mean strange.

I mean, it's unique. Where is it from? Are you from Spilly? Oh my gosh. So I'm originally from Croatia. No way. See, I knew it.

I could sense it. Really? Because it's not a Croatian name. It's a Persian name. Whoops. Failed again. All right.

So tell us your question. Ask us anything. Okay. so my question is um basically in this day and age it's pretty easy to like have an idea and you know think it's a pretty good idea but it's actually kind of difficult to implement it like well um and you are particularly good at that with all of your projects and i was was sort of wondering, what's your unique approach that, like, you know, I'm not going to read somewhere online how to do this because that's sort of, like, already known, but, like, you specifically, what do you find that has worked for you over the past couple of years? Do you want Lauren to answer this?

I mean, okay, I should say you're both really good at this, so both of you. Okay, well, the first thing I say to be completely blunt, and this is going to sound maybe harsh to some people, is that ideas don't mean shit. And I don't say that to discourage anybody. I say that to let you know the second part, which is execution is everything. So a lot of the time people come up with an idea, and they think from A to Z, and that becomes overwhelming. So they actually never get into execution mode. So I think when you have an idea, the biggest way to make it reality is to just get started. And instead of thinking from A to Z, think A to B, like what is the very first

step you can take to actually start implementing and executing on that idea? I always say that what has really, really helped me, and I continue to say this, is my upside down triangle method, which is that I had the idea of creating a community and a platform, which is the Skinny Confidential. And to lay the foundation of that, I needed to start with a niche and start small. So say your idea is like this huge, grand idea. I would pick something very niche within that idea that's going to help build it. So say you want to have a brand like Oprah. Oprah didn't just start Oprah. She started very, very small and niche and grew outward. So when I started my blog, I thought the blog was the perfect foundation to lay those bricks. And from there, I slowly grew outward and started

talking about different things besides just health and fitness. From there, I launched an ebook. I just constantly was growing outward. So instead of, I think with an idea, instead of looking at the huge overall picture, like Michael said, I would start with that tiny little niche and water it every single day. And definitely the most important thing, like you just said, is just to start. And it's not going to be perfect. And trust me, I'm a huge perfectionist. It's just not going to be perfect. I look back at my first logo and my first blog and what it looked like. And I mean, you can go back like five years on my, on my site. It's horrific. Like it's the worst thing you've ever seen. So just know that you

just got to throw yourself out there. Just start small and I think you'll be good. Yep. I agree. Yeah. I think, yeah, that's definitely really good advice. But then like, how do you sort of keep your, like, so you start with something and how do you sort of know when it's not working and you need to sort of switch to a different like path? Well, you know, you just kind of, I mean, here's the thing when you're executing on something and it's not working, a lot of people, they just keep banging their head against the wall. There's nothing wrong with pivoting, right? Like you can pivot and you'll know when it's time, right? And the only way to figure that out is just to get started. A lot of people think they have to launch and have a completely perfect launch and a perfect idea. There's been so many things that I've done that I've changed along the way and pivoted and

done differently. And like I said, the only way you're going to know is to get started and just know that there's probably going to be times when it doesn't work. Sure. Yep. Yep. I also think momentum is really important and habit. I wouldn't go into it thinking, what if this doesn't work? I would go into it more of this is going to work and I'm going to make it work and I'm going to ride it and I'm going to use momentum and habit to make it flourish. So rather than thinking like, oh, this is bad or kind of like an insecure approach, go into it with the approach of something's going to thrive out of it. And no matter what happens, if you lose or win, you're going to learn in some capacity.

Okay, cool. Thank you for calling. It was so nice to meet you. Will you email me at Lauren at the Skinny Confidential with the why I want to send you a meal plan from the Bombshell Body Guide for calling in? Oh, cool. Thanks. Sure. Thank you very much. Thank you. Good luck. Thank you so much. Okay, we have a surprise caller. Let's see who this is. Hello?

I'm looking to speak with Susan and Lauren, please. Oh, Jesus. Is that you, Moose Knuckle? Yeah, what's up, guys? Alex, what's up, dude? We got Taylor here, too. He's on the line.

So my dad named his dog Moose, and he's decided that his middle name's Knuckle. So when you're out here, you'll have to come. He's about to name it after me. Yeah, he named it after you. So when you come here, you'll have to wear those khaki pants that boosts your Moose Knuckle up and makes it look extra moosey. So for those of you who don't know,

Alex is one of Lauren and I's best friends, and he was on the episode titled Saint-Tropez when we were visiting him and his dad, Gene, in France, and we call him Moose Knuckle. He's the one from Boston. Yep. We're going to go visit him. We're going to visit. We're coming out there. I hope you get the house all ready for me. Clean it up. Get all your garbage out of the way.

Well, you certainly did yourself a disservice when you said Boston likes to drink a lot. You basically gave yourself a death wish. Every time I hang out with you, you give me a death wish. I'm perpetually drunk when we hang out. Most people have to train their bodies for extreme sports. I have to train just to visit with you because every time I visit with you, I feel like I was buried in a grave and dug up. You bring out a fun side of Michael though. You know, Lauren, I was also a little, I was thinking about this the other day, how I actually ended up with the nickname Moose Knuckle

because I do believe that Michael's Moose Knuckle was just as prominent on that trip. Wrong. Wrong. Yours was looking so big. I don't know what was squashed in there. It looked like you had a sock. That's a compliment. What's the name of the pants you guys are wearing? I might go have to buy some.

That's creepy. You're not going to have one. You'll have a little tiny lima bean. You'll have a little raisin. A little pickle. We'll call you Raisin Knuckle. Easy Cornishin. Yeah. So, Alex, what is

your question, if you even have one? What's my question for you guys? Yeah. You get to ask a question. So, I need to lose 20 pounds by San Tropez. How am I going to do it? That's on me, baby.

For one, let's cut out the 12 bottles of Rosea Night. That's step one. Step one. I can cut that back a little. Actually, Michael. In all seriousness, I have a good strategy that I was talking about yesterday for you. And I'm the perfect person for you to do this with. So we were talking, I don't remember where I was reading this study, but somebody, I

can't remember what it was, but basically what they did is they sent a picture of themselves in their underpants to their best friend. And they said, if by this date, I don't lose X amount of pounds, you get to post this on social media. So what I want you to do is send Lauren and I a picture of you in your underpants with your moose knuckle tucked back. And if you don't lose the weight that you want to lose by the date that we're traveling together, I get to post it on my social channels. If you send it to me, let me know in advance before I just get a picture of you in your underwear. It's a good tip.

You'd like that. Although, Michael, I'm just a little concerned. You may get thousands of followers of young girls in their 20s. Or I might lose thousands of followers. That's probably more likely. You know, you may just be bombarded by a demographic that maybe weren't looking to follow you. I don't really know about that, but

I think that you guys should do that. I'm serious, though. That's a good strategy. Anyways, Alex, thank you for calling. I love you. I'll see you next month. I love you guys. Love you. Bye, buddy. Bye. Before we take our next call, I'm. I love you guys. Love you. Love you, dude. I can't wait. Bye, buddy. Bye.

All right, bye. Before we take our next call, I'm going to tell you guys about RX Bar. This is legit the number one thing I put in my purse when we travel. And it's legit the number one thing I steal from your purse when we travel. I know. You're always stealing my RX Bar. So why I like this bar is because there's no BS. It's got dates, nuts, and 12

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crazy amounts of protein for bodybuilders like myself so i pack them when i go to the gym to grow my giant muscles right one oh my god they're perfect for an on-the-go breakfast throw them in your purse pre and post workout fuel or a midday snack at the office new customers can get 15 off today with free shipping and free returns by going to rxbar.com slash the skinny. Seriously, you guys, this is my hundred percent favorite bar, favorite find convenient, clean ingredients. Tastes amazing. Go to rxbar.com slash the skinny. Next question is from Ashley from North Carolina. Kevin's going to put her through. Hi, Ashley. You have Lauren and Michael from the Skinny Confidential, him and her podcast. Hi, Ashley. Hi. How are you?

Hey, Ashley. Oh, Taylor and Mimi too. They want to say hi. Hi. Hi. Thank you for calling. What's your question? My question is, what are your three main tips or things to focus on when you just first start branding your name or your blog what would you suggest i would definitely suggest to always think bigger than just you so like think of yourself whether you're going to call it your name or whatever it is, think bigger. So think about what kind of value you can bring to other people that's not just about yourself. So if you're going to launch a blog, I'm a really big fan of making that about value for other people as opposed to just like what outfit you're wearing, what lipstick you're wearing. That's fine to include all that, but make sure that the person's walking away with some kind of value

when they read something or if you're doing a product, make sure there's value in it. Another tip I would say is definitely aesthetics. I'm huge on that. So anything that I put out there, I like to make sure it's appeasing to the eye. I like simple. I like the color palette to be kind of branded. I want people to look at the Skinny Confidential and look at the colors and have it scream the Skinny Confidential. So with whatever you do, make sure that you're

creating a brand. And you can really do that through colors and fonts and aesthetics. And I always recommend going to Rite Aid and getting a huge poster board and start pulling from paint samples at Home Depot or finding texts on the internet and like cutting everything up and putting it on that poster board to make sure that it's appeasing to the eye. My last tip would be if you're going to put something out there, make sure you are going to be consistent with it and you have momentum and you keep that habit going every single day. So you're kind of chipping away at that ultimate goal. Like don't just launch something, kind of work on it one day a week, then come back to it, then abandon it and then come back to it again. Really work it and commit to it. Yeah. I think, I think a lot of Lauren's tips, you know,

those are focused on execution. I agree with everything she's saying. I think I'm going to give you a couple of tips on mindset when you get started. And I think the first thing is you have to be authentic to yourself. If you're doing a personal brand, it's not going to work well. If you are focused on what other people are doing, or you're not being exactly who you are, because that message is going to come off, um, to whoever's watching is kind of a BS message, you know, like they're going to say, wait, who is this person? They're not going to identify. So the biggest mistake I see people making when they're branding themselves is they try to be someone that they're not.

So that is the first tip. Second, you got to be patient when you're branding yourself. You got to understand if you're doing something around your life, it's a long, long game. It's not a short game. So try to do things keeping instead of like, you know, what's going to happen next year in a few months, what's going to happen in three know, what's going to happen next year in a few months, what's going to happen in three years, what's going to happen in five years, what's going to happen 10, 20 years, I think when you do that, it kind of gives you perspective. And then, you know, the final thing is, when you're personally branding yourself, and you're trying to capture an audience, you have to provide that audience with value,

you have to leave them with something that brings value into their lives and not into yours. Of course, you're going to have, you know, the benefit of having an audience and the benefit of having someone pay attention. But the main thing that's going to get them to keep coming back and be interested in what you're doing is by providing them with a lot of value. So everybody that I've seen that's had a lot of success has really given a lot of value to their audience and their community. Thank you so much for coming on.

Since you came on, I want to send you a meal plan. So will you email me at Lauren at the Skinny Confidential? Yes. Thank you so much. I loved your question. Thank you so much. Have a wonderful afternoon. You too, Ashley. Thank you, Ashley. Bye. We have Megan from LA on the phone. Kevin is going to loop her in. Hi, Megan. This is Lauren and Michael from the Skinny Confidential, him and her podcast. Hi, Megan. Hi. Are you calling from a jet aircraft?

Oh, my God. I am not. I am not. That's Taylor. Don't mind him. That's Taylor. Don't mind him. We got Taylor and Mimi here.

Hi. Hi. So we heard you have a question about introverts and extroverts. Yeah. I mean, I always consider myself a very extroverted introvert, and I work in sales, so it's a very extroverted job. And I really struggle with putting myself out there in networking scenarios or, you know, a scenario I'm not necessarily super familiar with or comfortable with.

So do you guys have any tips on how to kind of get past that? I think, you know, for me, I don't think I would consider myself so extroverted either. Someone asked me a question the other day. They said, hey, do you know what kind of personality type you are? And they guessed introvert. And, you know, maybe if I was asked that question earlier, I would have said extrovert. But I think I might be an introvert. And I think what it is, is just getting comfortable with the fact that life is always going to make you uncomfortable.

And when you understand that, and you know, like, okay, I'm going to be uncomfortable, but that's okay. I think it makes it a little bit easier. And then, you know, is this like a fear-based thing? Or you get do you get nervous or what is it no i don't think i get nervous um i just think it's one of those things where when i'm in a situation i'm really comfortable in i become more extroverted because i think people would always guess i'm an extrovert but i'm not like on the inside i'm you know really focused on maybe what they're thinking am i doing doing the right thing? Am I acceding to like my highest potential? So it's kind of always overanalyzing, I guess, if that makes sense.

Yeah, I mean, I totally make sense. I think that I wrote a chapter in my book called fake it until you make it. And I live by that. I mean, like Michael just said, people would think I'm an extrovert. And I mean, sometimes there's a lot of days where I just want to, you know, stay home and read and be with myself and my dogs. And I feel like I'm very introverted. So I can relate to what you're saying with, with your career. My first question to you would be, do you love what you do?

I love it. You love it. What I've always wanted to do. Okay. So you're, so in my opinion, like you already have half of the basis covered there. You love what you do. You're where you should be. And guess what?

I am uncomfortable every day. There's so many situations where I don't want to be doing something that I should be doing, like, like Snapchatting myself or whatever that is. But I do it because I'm building the brand because it's what I love. So for you, you're doing what you love. You're working where you, where you want to be. I would just say that you're just going to have to kind of come to terms with, to build your goal and your dream. You have to be. I would just say that you're just going to have to kind of come to terms with to build your goal and your dream. You have to be uncomfortable. Okay, great. If that makes sense. It does. It totally does. Yeah, it's always really funny because people really always think I'm super

extroverted, really comfortable in front of big crowds, and it's just not something I love. So I will continue to fake it till I make it then. Yeah. And also, I think when I will continue to fake it till I make it then. Yeah. And also I think when I'm really uncomfortable with something, I really try not to give it energy. The more I fixate on it and the more I give it energy, it grows. So my advice would to just throw out like the category of extrovert introvert and just kind of focus on growing what you love and you're in your job and you're doing your thing and not every day is fun. And sometimes you got to be uncomfortable and just go from there. And you know, I was having a conversation with a woman last night and the narrative was around,

you kind of, you kind of touched on a little bit about worrying so much about what other people are thinking when you're around them and deploying empathy and like wondering what they think when you say something and wondering what you think, what they think when, how you're acting. And honestly, my answer to her was really nobody gives a shit. I mean, maybe they do for a short run, but after a while people forget things, people move on. People really aren't thinking so much and fixating so much on what we're doing. You know, people are just living their own lives. So I think when you kind of understand that and you're like, listen, at the end of the day, nobody really gives a shit. Like they're not really that focused on me acting a certain way. I think it kind of opens up and gives you some

room to be more of yourself and kind of act how you want to be a little bit more comfortable. And then you start to not be as uncomfortable. Hey, Megan, you want to hear a quick story really quick. So yesterday, the same thing I was talking to a lady and for some, I don't remember the specifics, but I was telling her about the Meyer Briggs personality test. And I was saying, I have the ability to kind of be introvert, extrovert, kind of different in different situations. And she looks at me and she goes, Oh, so you've got multiple personality disorder. And I go, no, that's, I'm like, no, that, that is not, that's like a psychotic episode or something.

I don't have a disorder. Okay, what's the point? The point is you never know what you're dealing with, personalities. I don't know if that's relevant to what you were asking, but I think he just wanted to hop in to hear his own voice. He heard you were in L.A. and thought he had a chance. He thought he had a chance because he heard you were in L.A. Yeah, or you happen to be in West Hollywood. No, oh, my God, okay.

All right, thank you so much, Megan. Will you email me, Lauren, at the Skinny Confidential so I can send you a meal plan? God, okay. All right, thank you so much, Megan. Will you email me, Lauren, at the Skinny Confidential so I can send you a meal plan? Oh my gosh, yes, thank you. You guys are the best. Thank you so much. Okay, we love you. Thank you so much for calling in.

Thank you for calling. Thank you. Bye. Before we take our last call, I'm going to tell you about a new brand that I'm loving. Okay, so to be honest here, I am wearing the same pants for like three days in a

row. They're so comfortable. I want to tell you guys about Michael Lauren, where I got them. It's a new line of edgy, chic women's clothing that's designed and sewn in LA. Basically these pants are so comfortable. I could wear them to bed, but they're also super cute and chic. I feel like they kind of lift my butt, which is a plus too. You can see them on the website. They're kind of like the flared ones. I also got a couple of cute, cozy Casimir sweaters, a fitted turtleneck, and an off the shoulder bell sleeve top, which I'm obsessed with.

You've been checking me out a lot lately. That's true. You like these pants. I feel like I'm never going to take them off. All right. So we have a special offer for the skinny confidential him and her listeners go to michaellorenclothing.com and type in code skinny for 20% off your first order plus free us shipping. That's michaellorenclothing.com with promo code skinny for 20% off your first order plus free us shipping. And what an amazing brand name. Yes, it is amazing. We have Natasha from San Diego on the line.

Taylor. Hey, Natasha. Get any ideas? Hey. Hi, Natasha. This is Lauren and Michael from the skinny confidential him and her podcast. And we also have Taylor and Mimi here. Hi, Natasha. Hi, Natasha. How are you guys doing natasha hi how are you good how are you good thank you thanks so much for taking my call yeah thank you for calling so you're local oh god he's gonna try to hit on you awesome we should meet taylor is turning on a gps tracker and trying to find you i would run for the hills what's the what's your look what's your closest cross street oh my god don't tell him we're okay she's okay all right what's your closest cross street? Oh, my God. Don't tell them. No, we're okay. We're okay. She's okay. All right.

What's your question? So I have actually, I'm kind of wrestling with this right now. I met this guy through one of my classes that I'm in. And for the longest time, we've hit it off really well. And I had a feeling that he was with somebody. And we literally just found out like last week that he's actually married. And so I'm not sure if I should let him know that I know he's married. I found out through a friend on Facebook who knows his wife.

And so I'm not sure if I should let him know that I know, or if I should contact his wife and let him know what's going on. Because we definitely have been hanging out more than just friends. We've hooked up a couple of times. Well, this has really heated up. Okay, so the guy is married, and you guys hooked up, and you didn't know he was married, and you just found out. Yes, yes. Do you know his wife, and have you looked on her Facebook

to see if you guys have any mutual friends? Yeah, so I do not know her, but we definitely have some mutual friends who actually, we, we actually went to the same school together. So we have mutual friends that way. Um, and I do, yeah, but I do not know her. Okay. So there's two ways this could go. The first way is you say nothing and this comes out and you're going to get blamed. Okay. He's going to spin it. You're going to be the home.

Yeah. You're going to be the homewrecker. So, or the other way is that you figure out a way to like kind of state your case that, you know, you didn't know that this, that he was married and he's a scumbag, which he is a scumbag. So I think that you just have to know if you guys do have mutual friends, the truth like this, it was such a small town and social media always comes out. So, and it could be in a year. I mean, and you know how women are,

how they are with guys. Like we, we know like she, she probably feels that something's up. I just would would would hate for you to look like the bad guy in this because it sounds like he is the one that's shady as shit well let me ask you this is he still carrying on a relationship with you is he still pursuing you or is it like is this over is it ongoing or what's what's the deal yeah so he's definitely still trying to get a hold of me um and i realized the way that he's talking with me is actually through Snapchat messages. So I know that it just appears right after. So he's saying, I already kind of had a suspicion of being sneaky about why he's contacting me that way.

And now I know it's because he's trying to hide it from his wife. So when you met him, he didn't have a wedding ring on at all, even in class? That's very strange that you'd go out in public without a ring. No, it's not. It's called a shady idiot. Yeah. Come on. Does he know if he has kids?

No kids. No kids. Okay. So here's what I would do. And I'm psycho. So I don't know if my way is going to work. So what I would do is I would catch him in the lie on Snapchat. So I would position it where I wrote something that said, you know, I had no idea you were

married. This is despicable. Like, I can't believe that you would cheat on your wife like this. You've put me in this position where I had no clue. Let him respond to it and then take a picture of the Snapchat with another phone so he doesn't see you've screenshotted it. So now what you have is ammunition. So in case it does come out, you have this picture of the whole snap engagement. I would take video. I would take pictures of it. I would try to get as much out of him as you can via Snapchat.

And then if it comes out, you can be like, you have this collateral. You're like, listen, this is not my fault. This guy is really shady. I didn't want to get involved in this. But just so you know, here's proof. You need some kind of like proof that like shows that you are completely innocent in this situation and you really had no idea. And he's not going to give it to you through text message or email. It sounds like our social media. So you have to get it through snap message. He feels like that's a safe place right now for him to talk. So like, like

position him where he's backed in a corner because he's positioned you where you where you're backed in a corner so i don't think there's anything wrong with doing the same thing to him that's what i would do but i'm crazy you think that i should i should tell his wife at all because if it were me if the rules were reversed i would want to know i just don't know how she is in a situation like this or if she's done if she's cheating on him also. I don't know if that's happening. You know, if it's a...

Swingers. If they're both cheating on each other, yeah. Here's the tough thing about that. I've had a couple people that I know show proof to a wife that they cheated. And I've seen so many times the man twists it. Let me ask this question. Is there some kind of benefit that you will get from telling, or is there something you're looking for?

Like, is it you want to just tell on him, or does it benefit you in a way? Peace of mind. I'm a big fan. Yeah, more peace of mind. I wouldn't say I'm really gaining anything out of it. I'm just so pissed off about the situation, and that for all I know, he's taking her for a ride as well as me and maybe other girls too. And I just, if they're married, like that's coughing about, that's not just dating.

Like that's a life commitment right there. And obviously like he's not upholding that and it really kicks me off. Lauren might disagree with me on this, but I don't think that I would contact the wife myself. I just don't see that working out in any kind of way to your benefit. You know, and I can also see people's lives getting messed up. You don't know like what their family situation is or what. And I know like you want peace of mind and that's completely understandable.

But, you know, one of the victims in this situation is the wife. And, you know, I believe that, you know, things come to light eventually. And I just don't see you putting yourself in the middle of that helping you in any way. I can only see it maybe hurting. So Lauren might disagree with me though. I mean, listen, I talk about marketing and business and branding, and this is definitely not my strong suit, but that's just my gut feeling on it. I actually 100% agree with him. I think that I'm thinking of this as a logical, from a logical standpoint. And right now, you're emotional. And whenever I feel emotional, I never act on my emotion.

I think the only person that's going to get hurt by you presenting this information to the wife is you and the wife. If I were you, I would get that collateral, like I said on Snapchat, in case it does come to life. And then I would walk away and I would never talk about it again because what it's doing is this is wasting your energy and your time putting it into someone that's shady. whether or not you're dating him or what, you don't need to be talking to the wife. It's just taking your energy. I would walk away, get the collateral in case it ever comes out,

and just never think about it again. Okay. I think the messenger, no matter what you do, if you do go and tell her, will be shot in that sense because I don't agree with cheating in any sense, and I get why you want to tell her, but I really think no matter, even if you have proof, if you go and present it to her and say,

I didn't know about it, it's just not going to go well for you. And that's what I don't, I don't want to put you in that position. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, thank you for calling. We hope that helped. It's given me a lot to think about. I appreciate it. Yeah, we hope that helped. I would love for you to email me at lauren at the skinnyconfidential.com

so I can send you a bombshell body meal plan. Oh, thank you. That's so cool. I appreciate that. You're welcome. We're sending you good vibes. I'm sure it will work out.

Just do you focus on yourself and he's going to, it'll rise to the top. Thank you. Love you guys. Keep up the amazing work. We love you. Thank you. Thank you.

All right, you guys, that was so fun. It's so fun to engage with you guys we're gonna do collins again thank you for your questions thank you guys for calling in make sure you're subscribed to the skinny confidential him and her podcast on itunes rate and review us be nice and you can also follow us on snapchat i'm at lauren everett's and at And at Michael Bostic. And that is it. Taylor and Mimi,

say bye-bye. Bye. Bye, everybody. I guess I'm going to throw in my hashtag, too. At Taylor's You Die. And we will be gifting someone

Taylor's old ballet slippers. Yeah. Do you have your pointe shoes? Dust those off. I think I might have the head of the Nutcrackers. All right, it's time to go. Do you have your leotard?

Okay. Thanks for listening, guys. Bye-bye. See ya. Thanks for listening, guys. Bye-bye. See ya. Thanks for listening to The Skinny Confidential, Him and Her, with Lauren Everts

and Michael Bostic. Download new episodes every Tuesday at podcastone.com or subscribe now on the Podcast One app. Hey, this is Steve Bertone, host of the Forbes interview podcast, launching January 17th. My first guest is Adam Carolla, comedian and king of podcasting, sharing how he turned his persona into a media empire. I came from a world where nothing really ever worked out and no one ever got to do what they want to do, not for a living.

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