The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast - Loren Ridinger On Love & Loss, Turning Pain Into Power, & The Mindset Needed For Success

Episode Date: March 6, 2025

#814: Join us as we sit down with Loren Ridinger – influential businesswoman, entrepreneur, motivational speaker, best-selling author, and Co-Founder & CEO of Market America Worldwide | SHOP.com, a global e-commerce & product brokerage company. With over 30 years of experience, Loren has empowered millions, building a thriving empire alongside her late husband, JR Ridinger. In this episode, Loren opens up & gets vulnerable, reflecting on JR’s legacy, the values that shaped their success, & how she found strength to move forward after his sudden passing. Loren shares insights from her latest book, Scrambled or Sunny-Side up? Living Your Best Life After Losing your Greatest Love, offering wisdom on navigating grief, embracing each day, & choosing to live fully – no matter what life serves up next.    To Watch the Show click HERE   For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM   To connect with Loren Ridinger click HERE   To connect with Lauryn Bosstick click HERE   To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE   Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE   Get your burning questions featured on the show! Leave the Him & Her Show a voicemail at [phone].   This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential   Head to the HIM & HER Show ShopMy page HERE and LTK page HERE to find all of Michael and Lauryn’s favorite products mentioned on their latest episodes.   To purchase Loren Ridinger latest book, Scrambled or Sunny-Side Up? Living Your Best Life After Losing Your Greatest Love visit scrambledorsunnysideup.com.   This episode is sponsored by ARMRA     Go to tryarmra.com/SKINNY or enter SKINNY to get 15% off your first order.   This episode is sponsored by YNAB   TSC Him & Her Show listeners can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at YNAB.com/skinny.   This episode is sponsored by Netflix - Running Point   Running Point, now streaming only on Netflix.   This episode is sponsored by Cymbiotika    Go to Cymbiotika.com/TSC for 20% off + free shipping.   This episode is sponsored by Dr. Diamonds Metacine   Visit DrDiamondsMetacine.com to learn more about the InstaFacial(R) Collection and use code SKINNY at checkout for a free sample of award-winning InstaFacial(R) Plasma with any purchase of $200 or more.   This episode is sponsored by Live Conscious Collagen Peptides   Visit weliveconscious.com and use code SKINNY at checkout for 15% off your first purchase.   Produced by Dear Media

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. him and her. Lauren Ridinger is gracing us with her presence on the show. She is a successful entrepreneur and I mean very successful. She's the CEO of Market America worldwide, shop.com. You guys have probably used shop.com. She's also a motivational speaker, a mother, and an influential businesswoman. I have been wanting her to come on the show for so long. She has such an incredible journey as a powerhouse entrepreneur and a brand builder. And in this

episode, it's going to hit all the points. okay? So we'll uncover mindset, business strategies, and personal habits that have fueled her success. She also opens up about the death of her late husband, JR, and she's so vulnerable and real in this episode. We flew to New York just to interview her. She is that major. Lauren, welcome to the Him and Her show. This is the skinny confidential Him and Her. Lauren, your journey is absolutely extraordinary. It's wild. And one of the reasons I wanted to have you on the show is because there's a couple parallels with working and building with a husband that only you can understand. You guys, I love you guys. I just, you remind me so much of myself and JR.

What a compliment. It's, it's, I really love watching you guys. I just feel, I see so much of ourselves and what we did in this journey and the back and forth between the two of you, and I just adore it. We try to have fun. No, that's, if we're not having fun,

it's not worth doing. Let's go back to when you're 18 years old. Oh, gosh, that was amazing. Tell me about how you met your husband. I was working at I first met him. I was working as an aerobic instructor at a gym, a local gym in North Carolina. And he was a consultant for like, you know, one of those ad buster companies

seen on TV back then, you know, that was the form of advertising back in 1988 or 1989. I was also working part time as an office assistant as this manager. And he came in and somebody told us, this guy's coming in from New Jersey and he's going to be a consultant for this marketing firm. And I was like, OK, great. And they were like, he's going to hold a meeting at 6 p.m. Everybody has to be there. And I saw him. And when he came in, he was like, wow, you look like a little tiger.

I was like, this guy's totally trying to hit on me. But I liked him and I was totally intrigued by him. Didn't say two words to me. That was it. After he said that to me, didn't talk to me at all again. But he wrote me a note the next day, asked me to go to lunch. I did. He picked me up. He's like, you got to go down on the floorboard because I can't let anybody know I'm taking your lunch.

I know because he thirty six, right? He was thirty six. I was eighteen and he was working for the boss. I was working for it. Got it. So I think he just didn't want anybody see us together. And I was like, I'm not going down on the floorboard. It's not going to happen. He's like, you got to do it. And I did like an idiot. But that was the beginning of our journey.

Second date, he took me to a cemetery. And I was like, this guy's gonna kill me. For sure this guy's gonna kill me. I'm 18, I'm like, what are we doing here? He goes, get out of the car. I get out of the car. He's like, walk up and down, walk with me, follow me. And I was like, I was scared.

And he goes, pick any one of them. Any one of them. Tell me what they have in common. He goes, they all have a birthday and a death date. All that matters is what we do with the dash in between Whoo, that's kind of hot. It was hot. I fell in love at that moment. Oh, yeah, I was in love It was over and I realized it was in a good space. I had no idea anything about him I didn't know if he had anything didn't have anything if he had a house a car if he was running an apartment

I don't even know where he was from. But I was madly in love and I was gonna follow him wherever he went. And I did. And I found out he didn't have anything, but we built this incredible journey together for 36 years. Did you guys see something in each other ambition-wise from the beginning? You know, I... What I saw was a guy who had a lot of girlfriends on the side. That's what I saw. saw was a guy who had a lot of girlfriends on the side. That's what I saw. I saw a guy who had a lot of girlfriends and I couldn't understand, like, why are you not

just focused on me? And he kept saying to me, I'm just not on your time zone yet. Give me time. Give me time. And my mom would say to me, Lauren, not everything happens when you want it to happen. But there's something very special about him. Stay with him. He's going to be the greatest husband, the greatest father, the greatest, you know, he's going to make a difference in a community and thousands of people. And I thought, my mom is so smart.

How can she be saying this about a guy who has so many girlfriends? And she worked in a dry cleaners for three dollars and thirty five cents an hour. So she would clean his clothes and then find the letters he would write to other girls and hide them. And I was like, what is going on here? But she would not show them to me. And she shortly, not too long after passed away. And I found all the letters in her bag. She didn't want me to have him for a reason. Is that amazing? So do you think she just had the perspective

to see what it would be? Yes, I think she saw something in him and I think she realized that. I thought everything, you know, I was in high school, I was, you know, the girl that everybody thought was nice and cool and I think she thought like, you know what, you can't have it the way you want it right now, but he'll change.

What did you do when he had all these girlfriends? Were you stoic or were you, would you go crazy? No, no, I was a lunatic. He had, you're way too young to know this, but he had these little precious moment statues that I would go into his house and just destroy everything. By the way. It was a precious moment statue.

The little precious, no, I know precious moments. Like the little sad eyes. Yes, yes. Yeah. Why did he have a bunch of those? Well, he had like somebody would give them to him. So I would just smash them all. I was so lunatic, I was 18, I was crazy.

He probably liked your feistiness. He loved it. I think he loved that I was feisty. And then I, you know, after the cemetery, I fell in love with him. But I used to tell him all the time, I'm like, you know, I'm in love with you. And he's like, I like you a whole lot.

Don't let it go to your headline. Don't let it go to your headline. Don't let it go to your head. And of course, that would get me every time. And, you know, our relationship really kicked off when, you know, he told me, look, one day we're going to start a company is going to be like the mall without walls. And I was like, well, what does that mean? And he was like, you'll be able to buy your shoes, your clothes, your cosmetics online. This is before Amazon or anything.

And I was like, OK, and how do you expect that to happen? Because women like to try their things on. We like to play with makeup. We'd like to go in the store, try on lots of clothes. And he's like, you'll see. And he would go travel city to city, state to state. And I'd go with him and he'd tell everybody about what was coming. And they would look at him like he was crazy.

And I would say, you know, he would come out of that meeting like, what a great meeting, right, Lauren? And I was like, I don't think they thought that. I don't think they agree with us. And he was like, it doesn't matter what they think. What matters is what do you think. So he had this idea and this concept. This vision.

Way before, like, was the internet around? The internet was around just beginning. So he had this idea and this concept, this vision way before. Yeah. Like was the internet around? The internet was around just beginning. It was called the World Wide Web back then. How were people using it at the time? It was an informational site only. There was no real products on it.

Nothing had really started yet. And you know, there was nobody going to sell his products and we were going to, we were trying to tell him, look, we're going to sell these products online. But nobody wanted to believe it back then. They thought we were crazy. And we were like, they were like, well, who are you going to we were trying to tell him, look, we're going to sell these products online. But nobody wanted to believe it back then. They thought we were crazy. And we were like, they were like, well, who are you going to sell it to? He's like, well, we don't have customers yet, but one day we will. And today we have nearly six million customers.

But, you know, he never quit believing. He just put blinders on and went for it. It's almost he was like Jeff Bezos before. Jeff Bezos. Well, Jeff Bezos spent. He's amazing. was like Jeff Bezos before Jeff Bezos. Well, Jeff Bezos spent he's amazing. He spent so much money, you know, advertising and raising money for Amazon. He did such a great job. I love Lauren. She's incredible. But what we did is we didn't pay for advertising.

We paid people instead. And so we built this huge network of people, which is incredible. And customers everywhere. And, you know, before we'd know it, we'd commit, we didn't have any money to get products from manufacturers. We'd say, you know, would you make us 500 of them? As soon as they sell, we'll give you a little bit more money. You know, you can charge us 10 cents more, 15 cents more, and we did what we could to make it work. How much was it to initially make the first investment? Did you buy the website first?

Like, how does that work back then? Well, the funny thing is we didn't buy actually shop.com till 2010. You know, we started with nothing. I think we had $5,000. We hadn't started with the website yet. We were buying names back then. We had so many names to choose from. We were going through so many things.

And then we started to go to manufacturers and said, well, you sell us products. And that was the more challenging part, because they want big numbers, they wanna have 10,000 units of this, 5,000 units of that. And we didn't have that type of money. So what do you do? We did it anyway.

We went in there and we'd say, we'd take 500. We'll be committed to selling a thousand, but we could only take 500 now if you hold it for us. And they would. And so we still have longstanding relationships with a lot of those people who believed in us 33 years ago, which is really remarkable because when you think about it today, now, you know, buying 10,000 is a small number for us. But back in the day, buying, you know, somebody would believe in us to

do 100 or 200 bags at once was remarkable. What was the tumbleweed of it? Like where did you start to see momentum? Is it five years down the road? No, believe it or not, it was, you know, back in 92 today, the world is so different when we really launched, it was 91, 92. And back in the day, you know, nobody was making money from home. So we were able to offer people a home based opportunity. Now you can work at home anywhere.

You can be an influencer, a creator, you know, whatever you want to be. But back then, people who wanted to make money and work from home, especially moms, loved the opportunity. So by year two, we saw our first like 10 million. By year three, we were a hundred million in. We worked non-stop. So you grew, I mean, for anyone who's listening, that's a big jump. Back then. Well, especially back then. Back then. Do you know your first year?

That first year was about $10 million in sales. So you went from 10 to 100? Yeah, to 100 in the second year. How did you scale that and get the proper team? I got to tell you, we did it, JR married not just me, but he married my family. So all four of us were entrepreneurs. And so he had my brother, who ultimately is now the president of our company. My sister, who was a vice president, and my mom had passed away.

I told you at 42 right after I found out the letters of Jare. So young, massive heart attack. And my brother was 13. My daughter was just born. You know, she was seven months. Our daughter was just born. She was seven months old. And so after school, we'd make Steve come help us pack boxes. And we did it us and a handful of the kids I went to school with growing up in high school.

And everybody came in and everybody who came in at the beginning is still there. And we took care of everybody. We've never lost anybody except by God taking them in all these years together. So how long did you guys work together in the entirety of working together? Like how many? 36 years we were together. That is crazy. Wow.

Yeah. 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365. JR did not like being apart. He really liked being together. I used to tell him, like, go skiing, get out of the house. We push you out of here. I need a little space. And he would be like, so sweet.

He would be like, I want you to go with me But I thought it wasn't healthy for us to spend so much time together You feel that way people call us codependent a codependent. Oh my god downstairs to get a coffee She's like though. She's like she no, but I feel that because every time I would walk down the hallway Jail would be like where you going? I was like you do that. You do that, you do that. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I know. You know what's so funny though? Like individually, I'm a bit of a loner.

Like I can go out and I can be social. And I can do a lot, you know, obviously the business I run, I'm with people all the time, like in an extroverted kind of way. But honestly, like if I wasn't with her, you could put me on the side of a mountain by myself somewhere. That was JR. My husband was the same way.

Very quiet, very much alone, or didn't need to be around a lot of people, but was super dynamic. Could perform on stage for hours, but when he came home, he just wanted to hang with me. And that was a lot because I love being with him, but you know, there's also days you want to kill him. There's also days you want to have your own space. There's also days you're like, okay, let me just be me for a minute. Today I was looking in the mirror at myself, and he literally comes in front of the mirror and starts adjusting his outfit.

And I'm just like, go downstairs. Go get something done. Do something. Go get busy. And it's like... I love that he loves it. It's like, when we saw popping up... You ran in there and you're like, get out of the bathroom. I love that you guys love each other like that. Wait, you know what? I think the key to marriage is simple, and you're sort of saying this without saying it.

We like each other. First of all, you have to really like each other. Even before love, you have to like each other. Because love is such a word that we throw around. The second most important thing is respect. You have to really respect each other. Because Jerry used to say to me, once you stop loving me, once you stop respecting me, let me know and I'll leave you alone.

And I understood that and that never happened. You know, never. I used to say like, there's days I don't like you today. You know, I was really like, you know, if I had a tough day, I would be like, I just don't like you today because I worked for him. You know, I felt like he was my leader and I followed him. So I'd be like, I'm doing all of this. Do you see all I'm doing?

And back in the day, when we talked about this before, back in the day, nobody understood what it was like. A woman, it was really hard for a woman to have her shine, to be in that space. You know, he was, you know, a gentle giant. And I was just trying to fit in. I wanted to be seen by him, not because I wanted to be seen by others. I wanted him to fit in. I wanted to be seen by him, not because I wanted to be seen by others. I wanted him to see me. That's what I think is so unique about you is everyone's like a girl boss or an entrepreneur

or whatever. Now you were doing this before anyone was. I don't want to say anyone, but you were really leaning into the female entrepreneur side. Yeah, I really believed in female empowerment and he did too, I have to say. I have to give him a lot of credit. He was always one who was pushing me behind the scenes and going, my wife's awesome. She's amazing. And I'd be like, okay, okay, sweet.

He was supportive. He was very supportive. And you don't realize how important that is until you don't have it. You know what I mean? And that is just a beautiful journey. That's why I love you guys. When I watch you guys, I crack up. I just think your dynamic together is perfect. That's a very nice compliment.

It's just incredible. I watch everything you do. You know, like, similar to the relationship you experienced, I think, like, the dynamic exists because we've known each other for so long in such an intimate way that it's not forced. There's nobody else. Well, Jerry used to say, if it doesn't work out, I'm gonna kill you. Exactly, that's how I feel too.

There's nobody else you can have. Just go underground. At this point, we're kind of pot committed. Exactly, exactly, you're pot committed. No matter what, you're making this work. When you did a hundred million in sales, how did you guys continue to scale the business exponentially and grow it?

Or what was that like? Well, I'll tell you what, Jared never told us what the finances were. He never shared. Nope, he didn't want us to know. It wasn't until much later I found out. And the reason being is, is he did not want us to stop working hard.

He always, because remember, he had filed bankruptcy when I first met him. I didn't know he didn't have anything. I didn't know he didn't have a car. I didn't know he didn't have a house to live in. And I used to think, are you just dating me? didn't have a car. I didn't know he didn't have a house to live in. And I used to think, are you just dating me? Because I had a license.

You know what I mean? The first one I took him, they took me to that cemetery that time and said, get out of the car. He was going like 85 miles an hour down the road. I was like, you understand in North Carolina, you can only go 35 year. He was like, well, if I had a license, I'd go faster.

And I thought I'm with a real lunatic here. But those lunatics are the ones that make it happen. And I think that, you know, we, he never wanted me to know how much money we were doing. He didn't want to spend it. He didn't want to spend it. He wanted to keep reinvesting in the business. And it wasn't until 99,

we had started officially 91, 92, went in until 90, 90. So we're going to go buy a house. And I was like, really? Okay. How much money do we have? And back then it was like $5 million in Miami, which was a ton of money to buy a house. And we bought, you know,

I think it's the biggest waterfront still in Miami Beach. Still own it. Yes, yeah, we've lived there for 26 years. That's a good piece of property to still own today. I'm sure it's appreciated nicely. Well, I turned down a three digit number. I can imagine. Yeah. I'll use my imagination.

Yeah, it was a big one and it was by a big person. So I turned it down, but where are you gonna go? I've lived in that house my whole life and my kids grew up there, my grandkids have lived there. And so I feel like it's our legacy property. You know, he always used to say, when we came back in 2021, we lived in that house for so many years.

And he was like, we need a new look. I was like, what do you mean a new look? He's like, we're gonna get a new apartment this weekend and we're gonna refit this house and do it one more time. I was like, really? Cause I'm okay staying in an apartment. I'm good with it. I didn't need all the extra work.

It was a lot of headache on me cause managing the business and managing a house is a lot But he wanted that property for our kids, you know and for his grandkids. He said do me a favor I'm gonna get us this apartment and we moved in the same building with our friends that you know, Isabella You know and we all lived in this building which was incredible, but we renovated our home and it's almost done He never got to see it when you think oh, yeah, he never got to see the renovation. I never were just finishing up in the next six months, but he never got to see it. But I'm going to move back home.

You were doing it. Well, he got to design it. So we're doing what he designed, but he never got to see it. When you think back on your time with him from a business perspective, what do you think the biggest lessons he left you with were? Oh, I think he never give up. Do the hardest things first. I mean, he was really tough when he came to work. He'd be like, Lauren, let's get the hardest things done every day

before I get out of bed. He said, before you get out, give me all your time because I'm going to lose you as soon as you leave this bedroom. And he would. But he knew it because I was going in hard at what we wanted to do. But he used to say, you know, give it all you got. The hardest things first, because by noon you'll own the day yourself.

And he was right. And so I would always make my list before and he would walk by, you know, like he would come by you behind you in the mirror. He would walk by me at my computer and he would say, let me see your list. I said, really is let me look at it. And he'd take things off the list and go, you don't need to spend your time doing that. Do these things. He knew how to time management well and I learned that well. He used to say, don't give your

time freely. Let people have a little piece of view and walk away. And how did he figure this out? He just innately knew it. I got to tell you, I don't know. He's special. I think my mom saw that in him because so many times I was like, I don't know if I'm a stay with this guy's got girlfriends, this and that. And by the time we'd started the business, he ended up being this incredible leader and somebody who I looked up to and my mentor, my coach. He wasn't just now my husband. I think he just knew he used to monitor everything I would do, how I would spend my time, wanted to see what I do.

And at first, it drove me nuts. I mean, does that ever drive you guys nuts? I think things he does drive me nuts, but if he was if he had if he was dead right now Like I would be able to get on a mic and be like oh that was cute how he did that He's alive right now, so I don't have those little She tries to put on a tougher side here if I I was gone, she would be devastated, crushed. No, it's horrible. It's losing your teammate. Well, you know, you lose your partner in life. You lose everything. And I didn't expect it.

You know, I just I wasn't prepared for it. I really had no idea. I always thought that, you know, it would be me to go first. I was working like an animal. I was happy to do it. You know, his family lived to all of them, lived to 100. And I was like, this guy should outlive us all. It was kind of a joke around all of us. What were the circumstances around his death? We were on vacation in Croatia. He had written me in October of 21.

And he said, we've done a lot over 36 years together. Let's go take some time to be me and you. And I said, can you wait till August of 2022? It's our 30th company convention, and I want to just make it the best thing we've ever seen. He said, you're right. I don't know if we'll ever see one again. And he went on that stage. He performed for four days. I performed for four days. We went to Ben and Jennifer's wedding in Savannah two days later. And two days later, he got on the plane to Croatia.

I chartered a gorgeous, you know, beautiful boat in the med and three days in, he had a pulmonary embolism, just died instantly from the vaccine. Yeah, from the booster. Oh my God. Yeah, lost him. No notice, no plan, woke up that morning. He had been quiet for a couple of days.

I'm like, are you okay? He's like, yeah, babe, I'm just, I can't believe you made this happen. After all we've done, we're going away. I said, well, when are we going back? He said, it doesn't matter. We'll figure it out. I was like, okay. And we got on that boat.

And that morning he was, we were going to, I was going to take him to see the falls in Croatia. Croatia, the odd thing is Croatia was always on his bucket list. We had never been there. And I kept saying, why do you want to go to Croatia? Not that I had anything against it. Why not Paris again? Why not, you know, Europe? Why not Italy? Why not do some of the things we like doing?

He was like, I want to go to Croatia. I was like, OK. He was quiet. And I could tell his knee had stiffened up and he had a sports injury injury from playing, you know sports his whole life and He was gonna have it looked up by the Real Madrid coach. The doctor was gonna look at it for us two days later We never made it he woke up that morning and said I love you and you have made me the happiest man in the world And I just want you to know that I said, why are you saying that to me? Why would you tell me something like that?

That's crazy. Because saying I love you was very easy. Like you flip me over all times of the night. Turn over, baby. I want to hold you this way. Turn over this way. I want to hold you this way. I love you was easy. But you know, when somebody is super successful,

you never really know how to satisfy the appetite. So you don't know what really makes them happy or if they're completely content or if they're full. And I needed to hear that in that moment, but I didn't know why he was saying it to me in that moment. And I said, well, don't say that. Of course you make me happy. Why are you saying it like that? He said, I just want you to know you've made me the happiest person. I don't need to go walk the falls because I won't be able to. My knee is stiffened up. I want you to know, you've made me the happiest person. I don't need to go walk the falls because I won't be able to, my knee is stiffened up.

I want you to go." And I was like, no, no, I'm not gonna go. And we didn't. And within hours he took a deep breath and that was his last breath and that was end of it. Just like that. Do you think he knew? I think, I'll tell you what I think.

I'll tell you, I would have never thought that anyone could know. I think God has it written for us and I would have never believed it till now. I think that he had some innate sense. Something was very wrong in the last 24 hours. That somebody, I don't know if it's a spiritual guide. I don't know what it is because I didn't would have never thought those things beforehand. I think that somebody comes to you after and says, wrap it up.

You know, I think that's what happens because we found a beautiful letter that's in the book about that he had written that we found in his draft folder. I said, thank you for this beautiful journey and all the people we've touched, but our miraculous, turbulent, beautiful love story will be one that will live with me forever. You can be me now. I love you.

So he had, there was something. There was something there. Had no idea he was sick. And he wasn't sick. That's the funny thing. It was just a clot. And we had tested his blood right before he did the second booster.

Tested it right after him. We did see something on the test, on the second test. I said, why is his platelets up? And they were like, it's nothing. It's probably he drank coffee. Had a meal before he took the blood test. They were like, go on your journey. We'll see when you're back.

When you talk about a vaccine injury, it's something that I've only heard about off air. People don't come on air and they don't talk about it. And I can tell you, I've heard a lot of vaccine injuries off air from doctors and scientists. And I think it's commendable that you're actually coming out heard a lot of vaccine injuries off air from doctors and scientists. Oh no. We knew. And I think it's commendable that you're actually coming out and talking about this.

How did you find out that that's what it was? I'll be honest with you. It's a really good question. I didn't realize it at first. Even though I knew his blood work was off and I showed it to him, I said, Jerry, your blood work is off. Do you want to get on that boat? Do you want to go to Jen and Ben's? I don't know if we should. And he's like, of course we're going. I'm an animal. We're fine. We're good. Everything's fine. We're going.

The blood must be off because I ate in the morning. You know, he made excuses for it. But when we came home, you know, to bring Jerry home, it took David and Victoria Beckham got involved. They had to call people who spoke the language, you know, who would speak English and help translate for me to get his body back. Yeah, they weren't going to let me take him home. We were in Croatia and they were like, you can't bring him home.

I was like, you don't understand. I'm not leaving here without him. He's my husband. He's meaningless to you. He's everything to me. They were like, well, it's not going to happen. It could take a month. And I had so many friends from Alejandro's sons, David and Victoria, David and Isabella, everybody was getting involved, trying to find people to help me. Sure enough, six days later,

we were able to bring them home, get a plane, bring them home. And when we got there, they tried to tell me, you weren't going to fit on the plane. I said, listen, we're going to take them out and he's going to lay right beside me. We're going to take that journey together. And I did that to bring them home because I wasn't gonna leave him there. When we landed, it was like four in the morning and I didn't want, I knew that the press was at a different airport and I said,

I'm not gonna get him up, I'm gonna reroute. Took him off the plane. The next morning I heard people in the kitchen. I had not slept. It's like two hours, I got in rest, hadn't slept this whole week. And I went downstairs and I heard everybody whispering I said, why are you guys whispering? What is going on said the funeral home called and said that day J.R. Was deteriorating

I said, well, that's impossible The ambassador made sure that I am bomb J.R. Because they weren't gonna it's the law to bring a body into the United States You have to embalm them to bring them home. And I did, I paid for it and they did it. Said, well, they want to speak to you. I went there and he said, well, there was entry points, but they were not able to embalm them. So I called immediately Croatian.

Little did I know that they did me a favor. They signed those papers and he told me we had never seen a clot that big. It was so long and stringy that the fluid wouldn't flow through his body. And we've only seen that from the United States vaccine. And so at that moment, everything came together and I realized, I was like, oh my God, this just happened. I can't believe this was it. Because I had COVID four times and I didn't get the booster. And he kept saying, why aren't you getting it? I said, I had COVID four times. He goes, well, I didn't get it.

And when I had COVID, Jera was like, you come behind me, wouldn't leave me alone. He was like, I'm going to sleep with you. I was like, you can't, I have COVID. I'm going to sleep in the guest house and I'd wake up and he'd be in the bed. You know what I mean? And I was like, what are you doing? Oh my God. It was like whack-a-mole.

Yeah. It's like crazy, but he never got it. So he thought the booster worked. Or maybe he got it and just never had any symptoms or who knows. But yeah, I mean, it's frustrating that so many people are finding out about these things after the fact. And it's even more infuriating and frustrating that there was this pressure during that time to not raise hands and ask questions and speak. I mean, like doing this show, we, you know, we got pushed back all the time during that time for talking.

Someone wants to inject something in your body and you can't ask a question. It's the weirdest, I feel like I'm on Mars. You can't ask the question. We're aliens. And by the way, not only can you not ask a question, maybe I have 20 questions. That's it.

Maybe you have 20. Exactly. And why are you forcing me to take it right now without me even knowing about it? Also let me think about it. Yeah, let me think about it. Let me see how much testing has happened. When you make a business decision, you sit and settle with it. No, I settle with it.

If I don't know what to do, let me tell what my rule is. Don't do it. Do nothing. It's the best. That's the best thing ever. Do nothing. Jerry used to say, if you don't know what to do, Lauren, do nothing. It's the best. That's the best thing ever do nothing Jerry's to say If you don't know what to do Lauren do nothing, but It's my favorite thing ever and but yet there was like get it right now Like you know what you don't have time to think it didn't he really believed and at any other time

Honestly, what to live listen to the government, but he took it. You know, he was 18 years older He thought maybe I need it. And she doesn't. How old was he when he passed? Almost 70. Okay. Yeah. So when you start talking about this, you obviously have a lot of Hyatt profile friends.

Are you getting pushback or are people like, thank God? I think that people, you know, who are okay with me talking about it, I haven't gotten any pushback from any of my friends. So like,, there's not, like, weird government high-up people contacting you? I've had people contact me to talk about it for sure, or to stop me from talking about it. Yeah, that's what I mean. And I think that I just won't do it.

This is your experience. Imagine not being able to talk about your experience. I think that's the pressure that I'm talking about. People had a specific experience, and they're like, okay, even if you had that experience, like, don't question or talk about it. Like, that's not fair to those individuals. I mean, it's so unfair.

It's so unfair. And it's a story that's going to be told. It's going to, it's happening too much. We're hearing about it now. This flu season has been absolutely brutal. Whatever's going around is just nasty. And that's why I'm so excited to talk to you guys about Armour Colossum. You guys know I'm always on the lookout for ways to strengthen our immune system, our

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that I put my kids to bed early. I dimmed the lights, I got my snacks, I got my blanket, and I was ready to watch. You'll love it. Running Point is now streaming only on Netflix. Get ready to binge your new favorite comedy. So I just wonder because you have such a voice and a platform and you know, all the things that I just wonder if there's people who want you to basically shut up.

I'm sure. I'm really sure that there is. And I just, for me, I just will only share it with people. And that's, I think, a big part of the message. Just us two and the couple listeners. Yes, us two and a couple listeners. But, you know, I feel like it's a story that has to be told at some point. It's one that we have to see. It's like you said. I want to make that decision. It should be my choice.

You know, there was a time you couldn't even be in New York and you couldn't go anywhere unless you took the vaccine. Yep. Remember that. It's kind of crazy. You know, at least Florida, you know, if we could get away with not taking the vaccine. But he just, you know, was told, OK, this is the age. This is the age I got to take it. She had covid four times. I didn't.

And so he believed it never once did we say, what are we doing until he took the booster? And he said, why aren't you taking it? I said, because this isn't done shit for me. I've had COVID so many times, you know, and so I didn't. So looking back, you obviously- No, I'm mad at myself. I even had him, let him do it. I'm mad at myself for letting him do it.

You didn't, I mean- I know, but you know, you go through that. The journey of grief is one I cannot ever, I don't wish on anybody. I lost my mom, she was young. I lost my dad when he was young. I knew grief. I didn't know anything like this.

You know, it's like, I know how much you guys love each other. I see it all over you guys. I didn't know how I was gonna survive it. I really didn't. I didn't know how I was gonna come out you guys. I didn't know how I was gonna survive it. I really didn't. I didn't know how I was gonna come out of it. I didn't know if I could come out of it, as strong as I was.

It wasn't until Serena Williams, you know, had sent me a passage one day. And in that passage, she was sending me passages every day. She's such a great friend of mine. And in that was this advertisement from Miami for like a small grief group that was going on on Mondays. And I decided, you know what, I'm gonna go. I had fired like four therapists

because everybody's like, are you gonna date again? Are you gonna do this again? I was like, damn, I'm just trying to survive, man. I'm trying to like myself again. I was trying to find me again. You know, I was in charge of my house. I was the boss of us. I was, you know what I mean?

He liked that. He liked that I took care of our family. And so now I was all that confidence he had instilled in me. I'd lost it all. And that was like starting over again was the most painful experience of my life. And how do you replace such a presence that is a partner like that? It just was the worst, worst feeling. You cannot. I, when I lost Jera, it was like a hundred times worse than losing

my own parents. I knew him longer. I loved him with my life. The guy who believed in me, the guy who saw things in me, the guy who would have entrusted me with anything. And the things he even wrote to me at then, even in his will about how I changed his life, the things that, you know, he wrote me 5,000 love letters, by the way. Oh, OK. Well, you better fucking get started. I'm going to fucking start it right now. Where is my 5,000 love letters? How do you know how he wrote you 5,000?

Because I was the psychopath that I was after he passed away and I was a lunatic, you know, mad, angry. I searched our homes. I found everything here. I saved them all. You got you. You got about $4,500 to go. Yeah, you got a lot to go, baby. But here's the thing. Until 70, so I got, you know.

You got time. I got time. But do a lot. But here's the thing. I used to say to him, like, he could be sitting where you guys are and write me. And I'd say, why are you writing me when I'm right here? He's like, because I don't want you to misunderstand anything I have to say about you, because I love you. And I want you to know it always.

He sounds like a very special. Well, he was very special. He was a pain in the ass too, don't get me wrong. Yeah, they all are. There was days that there was pain in the ass days. But when I say love, he knew how to express it. When I look back at some of the letters, like early day letters are funny,

because they would go like, I like you so much. Don't let it go to your head. Don't try to control everything I'm just trying to be a good guy and then the next letter would be like I love you so much but our journey was as he said in the end very turbulent and very very much full of love and adventure and I think that you know when I think about the journey of Of that relationship working it out no matter what you know, when I think about the journey of that relationship, working it out no matter what. You know, I used to be pissed off at the end of the day. I'd be like, I'm done. You know, we're going to get a divorce. He's like, why do you throw that word out so easy? He says whenever I say that word, he gets so mad. Michael gets mad too. He gets so upset.

And why put that out there? And he would go to our daughter. He's like, your mother's so mean. She throws that word out so easily. And I was like, I'm done. And then he'd be like, you can't leave me. I'll kill you. You can't. And you know, it took me a while to really understand

that he didn't want to use words like that. Yeah, I get that. I think like, you know, words have power. They do. And he didn't want to use words like that. Yeah, I get that. I think words have power. They do, and he didn't like it. Sometimes women just want a period effect. Yes, that's it. And that word really drives it home. God, it's like, wake up.

My thing is, some people can throw a word around, they throw it around flippantly, but if you throw it around enough and it actually becomes a reality, I think that's when people, you know. Well, he used to say, Lauren, your words are powerful. Every time he used to say, like, if I could think something, he's like, be careful what you think, Lauren, it always happens.

And then after we've been super successful, had lots of homes in our life, he's like, stop thinking about houses. Stop thinking about this. I don't want anymore. We can't have anymore. You don't need anymore. We don't need anything. I was like, OK. What was that like for you guys as a couple who as you said came from sort of nothing? No zero and making all of this money together how and when you did realize how much money the company was doing

What was that like? It was so funny going on a buying spree No, it was it was funny because he never saw money as a scoreboard He didn't want me to see it. He didn't want us to have actually put it away reinvest it in the company It was it was funny because he never saw money as a scoreboard. He didn't want me to see it. He didn't want us to have actually put it away, reinvest it in the company. Humble. He kept us humble. He used to say, don't forget where we came from. We'll never find our way back, Lauren. And so we had grown to by the time we were doing six, eight hundred million dollars

a year, it was the time I was like, you know, what's going to happen now? It's like nothing. All we can do is help more people, help more people to become entrepreneurs. That's all I care about. And that's where he would spend his time is helping these people have their own home based business, their own, you know, market, America shop dot com store. And that meant so much to him. And, you know, I never really asked.

I made my own money. I never really asked me. He paid me well. I never asked him for anything. You know, I live really asked. I made my own money. I never really asked me. He paid me well. I never asked him for anything. You know, I live by a real strict budget. He made me go through the budgets every month, house budgets every month. He made me understand him. If something was $25 over on a light bill, he'd say, why do you think it's over on this? I was like, I don't know, but I'll pitch in the 25 if it'll help.

You know what I mean? The conversation from stopping. That's amazing. I would just be like, are you serious? But that's what made him great. How did you guys manage the people around you when you started having that kind of success? Because I imagine that that can be a challenge.

It was a challenge. That's always the hardest challenge. I don't know that we have the solution for that still. I still think that you have to build a solid team around you. But one thing I've realized is instead of me having a lot of people, I keep a very little circle around me. And I make sure those people have a lot more people than me. And the reason why I do that is I'm better off with a small group I have to deal

with that, that I can try. How do you do that with your employees? It's I got to tell you, I am really conscious of it. I just, you can ask anybody in my house, the manager, the house manager, they all have assistants, but I won't. I'm like, you know what? Cause you guys get what you need to help support my needs,

but I just want to deal with the three of you. And it has worked for me. And Jared was very private. He did not want a whole lot of people in the house. If he wanted eggs, he wanted me to go get them. You know what I mean? If he wanted cereal at night, he was like, can you get me some cereal? He didn't want a bunch of help.

He didn't. He really liked having his own little world with me. And I think in many ways, I used to think you do realize how much I do all day, right? Like, he's like, yeah, I love it. I love how much you do. It means so much to me that you care about us. How were you guys able to have antennas for people who were around you, both for the wrong reasons?

I think I just became so guarded. Yeah. I became so guarded. I became, you know, you become very protective and very conscious of what's around you. You guys know you have to do that. You have to do that. It's very important that we're aware that we don't put too many people in the circle

that you've checked out. Every time somebody would say, hey, can we come over the boat tonight and bring our new friends? I was like, do you have a resume for them? Cause you know, you're conscious. You're aware. You want to be sure of who's in that circle.

J-R had this really strict rule. If they had a negative attitude, he did not want them around him. I don't blame him. He did not want that. I think you want to help people and you want to bring people up, but then at the same time, you want to make sure people are there for the right reasons. Yeah, you want to make sure people want the same thing you want.

Even if it weren't my dad. When I first started dating my dad, I mean my husband, JR, my dad was very, very not happy with that. He wasn't approving of that, he didn't like it. Because of who he was or because of the age difference? He didn't like that he didn't have any money and he didn't like there was an age difference. He made up for it.

Oh, he made up for it much later. In fairness, like what dad does, you know. But my dad was a pain in the ass and he didn't really care about what I wanted. What he cared about was what he wanted. And no offense, I love my dad, God pain in the ass and he wasn't didn't really care about what I wanted what he cared about was what he wanted Mm-hmm, and no offense. I love my dad. God bless him up there, but You know at 19 years old he was like you're gonna go be a flight attendant I was like, I don't want to be a flight attendant. He's like, well you're living in my house

You're gonna go get a job. I was like no we are I'm with this new boyfriend of mine and we're gonna have the mall without walls and one day people are gonna buy whatever they want Need right online. He's like, well, that's nonsense. It won't happen. They got me in the car, drove me and made me stand in line in North Carolina with 300 people waiting in line. OK, who all wanted to be a job as a flight attendant. Not that there's anything wrong with being a flight attendant.

I'm afraid to fly. So I didn't want to do it. So by the time they called my name up there, like, what makes you want to fly the friendly skies? It was Eastern Airlines, which is way before your time and they were like what makes you want to fly? I said I don't I don't even like your airlines. I like American. I don't like anything about your airlines I don't want to do this and I did set all the things not to get the job I got the job one week later. I had to go to report to Atlanta and Train for four weeks. Jared picked me up at the airport and said, listen, Lauren, after I got back from training,

he said, if you don't go home right now and tell your father that you don't want to do this, you're going to become a version of yourself you don't recognize. You're going to become a person you never meant to be. You got to tell him right now. I went home. I told him, Dad, this is the end of my days of flying the friendly skies. I packed my bag and showed up at his house. That was the only part I didn't tell JR I didn't tell him I was gonna move in with him at that moment But I did and that was really the beginning of our journey

And when I think about all of those lessons along my lifetime and all the things that we did You know, he must have thought I was crazy This girl's 18 19 years old showing up on my doorway with her bags Her dad basically told her get out of the house and he did. One thing I find so impressive about your whole journey is you guys, you, it's a 30 year build of a company. 33 today. 33 today. Today? And this month coming up, we're coming up, but one more month will be 33 years. when you guys set out to do this Did you have a strategic plan? Did did you and JR talk about selling it? Was there like what was the?

Longevity he wanted to stay with it forever Okay, so is that what you're saying? I don't know what I'll do. I think this that's where I want to go That's what I want to do right now. I'm in this phase of I love That's where I want to go. That's what I want to do right now. I'm in this phase of I love, you know, seeing the future way ahead. And so I'm thinking about where the Internet will be. And I think it will move forward into live shopping. I think it will do, you know, we don't need TVs anymore.

They're not a necessity, right? They're an accessory today. So I have to see things differently. I think more products will sell on podcast than anywhere. I think more more products will sell on live TV through a phone. I think I have to think about outside of the box, moving people out of just realizing they're not going to be on their computer. I think there'll become a very, a time very soon where people can, you know, pick the water, customize the water just the way they want it and have it sent to them. I think we're moving into a different phase and I'm really preparing my team. And my brother who, Mark, who's the president

of our company is right there with me. Like right now we've been full strategy, how we're gonna prep our team. And it's hard for them to grasp that sometimes. But that's where I'm going. I'm five to 10 years ahead right now. And I think if you're not thinking that way, you're going to have a problem. We have to be prepared for that. And I never did that before. I think it's happening from upstairs.

Ah, I think he's sending that messages to me. So I think I know what to do. He was a visionary. He would he'd always see things before they'd happen. And I feel like, you know, he's sending that to me now. And that's why I'm working on it now. How are you in the boardroom with a bunch of guys? Oh, I'm tough. I want to know exactly, like, set the scene. I'm not going to lie. What does it look like? If I said I was nice and sweet,

they would be laughing behind my back right now. I'm tough. J.R. used to tell me, you're a person who doesn't produce a non-producing person's nightmare. Lauren, I'm tough. I like to get it done. I want people to think logically. I didn't get to go to college.

We didn't have the money. I had to do everything from hard work. I had to blood, sweat, and tears. I had to prove myself. My brothers had college educations. I didn't. I needed to work harder. Everybody on my team, I wanted to work harder

than everybody. All of the vice, we have 10 vice presidents. I wanted to work harder than all of them. vice we have ten vice presidents I wanted to work harder than all of them I wanted Jared to see me instead of seeing them and so I worked to show off for him not I didn't care what other people think I wanted to know what he thought and because of it, I think he was blown away and Because of it, you know, I would make sure it would work and you know I got to the point where he'd be like, okay How do you know this is gonna work what you're gonna do?

I was like cuz we're gonna make it work and I'd learned that from him when we first started So, you know, I think it's a whole new world today. I don't think it's about e-commerce I do think that right now even you guys I think you said, you know, I know you have your mouth tape, right? Which I love that. I love it. I can't wait to use that tonight But I think like this is where products are gonna move and I think people need to understand it's about authentic conversation Which is why I love you guys that authentic real and more than authentic. I prefer the word transparent I like the word transparent because that's what conversations really move product It's funny like doing it as like obviously I run quote like front-facing people think oh, he's in a podcast business

But I just look at it as an aggregator of attention. First of all, you guys are an aggregator of great people, great products. That's very nice. That is from you. It's way more than attention. It's way more than that. It's what you guys are doing is highlighting great people because you're great people. You're getting people.

When I watch you guys, I'm watching you guys because I actually love you guys. I feel like you've invited us in your living room, your family, that's how I see it. And that's what will move more product than anything. That moves the needle. Not just, and that's where I'm trying to get my team to understand it's not about just what's happening online anymore.

We can't think that way. If we want to be innovators and move with the times, we've got to be able to think much bigger. Yeah, well, and like, I appreciate you saying that so nice, but selfishly, what I tell people all the time is like, Lauren and I get the benefit of sitting with people like yourself all the time. Right. And so for us, like you're right, you have to you kind of have to like move with it, but also like you learn things and you see things maybe before they start to happen on a mainstream level. You guys are seeing things before they happen.

But that's what I'm saying is you see it because of the kind of the dial. It's just like a pattern. But you couldn't see it if you weren't it. You just couldn't see it if you weren't it. Trust me. Well, you nailed it already. I'll take that from the queen entrepreneur, Michael. I'll take that compliment.

The fact that you guys can see it means you have it. And the reason why I know it is that you know Jerry used to tell it to me all the time when I was unsure of myself You know the first time that he told me do you believe in this and he said you have to speak? I was like, I can't I'm afraid to speak in front of people. I'm 18 I don't speak and I passed out in front of like 10 people I was so embarrassed and he was like get up get up. You were people. I was so embarrassed. And he was like, get up, get up. You were amazing.

I was like, I was awful. I wanted to break up with him. I just wanted to go back to North Carolina at that time. And I was from Florida, but I'd met him in North Carolina. And I was like, I just don't want to do this again. And he goes, Lauren, you're going to be the greatest female speaker one day. You just don't know it.

And now you speak everywhere. Well, it's just now I speak in front of 20,000 people, you know, 15,000 people. I do it all the time. But it's part of who I am. It's my DNA. But it never was in the beginning. It took me time and I just kept trying. And it's when you can see that in somebody like he saw to me or I can see it in you guys.

You know, that's because you have it in you. It's like when I watch you guys, when I saw her mouth table, I was like, I'm getting that. I'd already bought a whole bunch, don't you worry. But my point is, I'll take it anyway, then leave it here. But my point is this, there's so much more. This is just the beginning. Yeah.

What do you specifically look for at this point in your career when talent either comes to work with you, for you, or when you're looking at opportunities? I just want people to be innovative. I want people to think outside the box. I want people to come with you, for you, or when you're looking at opportunities, what is the thing? I just want people to be innovative. I want people to think outside the box. I want people to come with opinions, ideas. I don't believe in the time where people should go into a boardroom and not have a thought,

not have an opinion, not have a, you know, you wanna go make it happen attitude, just don't be like rah rah and yes me. I want you to tell me what we're gonna do. Tell me what excites you, tell me what moves you, tell me what's gonna move people, what will me what excites you. Tell me what moves you. Tell me what's going to move people. What will move the needle? I think that people stop thinking.

And that drives me nuts because there's so much up here and we don't share it. And so, so often like I'm always promoting people to a different level, because I look for them. I'm like, I don't care if you started at nothing. You know, I want you to be the biggest thing ever, but you got to think. You got to think. You got to tell me how are you going to do it? How are we going to get there?

You know, Christian, who I brought here with me today, had been working with J.R. for years behind the scene, you know, backstage, walking with us, taking care of us on the stage. As soon as J.R. passed away, he saw me trying to become two people. I was now two people who had not replaced myself. Because remember, I worked for JR. I was one of his, you know, as the senior vice president, I was one of his people. And then I had to figure out a way, how was I going to do that job and my job?

And he stepped right in. He started to pick up saying, I'm going to help you do this. I'll help you do this. He would help my brother, Mark, do that. Before you know it, I was like, OK, guess what? You're going to become an executive vice president. He was like, really? I was like, yeah. See, you can change someone's life if they start to help you change others.

I also think what you said that's that's so important, too. It's like if you're working for someone or you're on a team, always give extra added value. You do when you're like, that's not my job. Oh, God. I tune out. I'm not that that's not a good thing. It's like, that's not my job. I tune out. I'm not that. That's not a good thing around me. It's like, how can you add more value, which then adds more salary, which then adds more title.

And by the way, isn't it better to have, I'd rather have fewer people with a lot bigger salaries than a lot of people who are not thinking outside the box. How big is the company now? Well, right now we're about 980 employees. There's a hundred and eighty thousand, you know, marketamericashop.com salespeople sell little entrepreneurs who sell our products all over the world. And, you know,

we're doing about seven hundred million dollars a year right now. We took a dive when JR passed away and then I got right back to work. And at first I let it happen for a moment. I wanted people to know that he had such a big contribution to who we were. What a wife. And I was like, you know what?

Let everything crash and burn when I'm gone. Just let it go and then- I get what you're saying. You know what I'm saying? For a moment, because here's what happens. And they know this. I wrote this in the book I wasn't I was very transparent. I was angry, you know, there's an angry Lauren in chapter one and by the end

I start to find myself again But I wanted people to understand see there was this beautiful team that we had built But some of them always think they know more than others And they were like, well, we should do it this way. They are and you know, do it that way And it's not that some of them didn't have great ideas or all of them at some point, but some things J.R. just knew. And J.R. used to say to me, maybe I'm not needed anymore. I said, stop saying that. You're our leader. Of course you are. Don't ever say that, by the way, until you're ready to really mean it, because they say that once you say it.

Yeah, you got to be careful of that. They say once you say it. I didn't hear that till later. It says until once you start to say that, then you know, God can call for you. But that's what I'm talking about with language. I'm very careful, actually, about like these serious things that I say. That's interesting that he was started to say that. Well, he would say a couple of times towards the very end, he would say, you know, maybe I'm not needed anymore.

It's like, that's not true. He's like, no, I said, you know, maybe I'm not needed anymore. It's like, that's not true. He's like, no, I know you need me. Maybe I'm not needed anymore. And by the way, don't you ever worry. You can always do this without me. You will always make it. But I think when people's, you know, their egos get in the way, right?

And when that happens, it gets messy. And when he passed away, those egos couldn't save anything. And I wasn't in a rush. I needed to go through what I needed to go through. And it wasn't until I called Mark and I said, Mark, let's get in there and go back to work. I'm going to leave next week on a tour.

I'm going to go back out in the field. I'm going to go back out to our leaders and I'm going to travel to 32 cities. And I'm going to show up because are you crazy? I said, no, just let's get a plane and let's go next week. And we did. And things started to escalate back up again. And now, you know, we're back to doing where almost where we were when Jared passed away. But it's been a journey.

And for me, it's more about I only want to do it if I can change somebody's life, because there's no amount of money that can change my life or my kid's life anymore. But there are many more people we can help. And that's why I only want to work around innovators. That's only that's the reason why I only care about working around the best of the best. You know what I mean? That's what's so interesting about you, too. Another reason I wanted you on the podcast is you don't need to write

this book for money, for fame, not about it, for a business card. Like, it seems to me that you wrote this book to help other people and also at the same time, heal yourself. I did. And almost as an homage to your husband. To him. To him, I wanted the story to be told about him.

But I also, I was mad at myself. I didn't see how important when he would say, words have meaning, Lauren. You know, and I would I would be like Oh, don't be ridiculous. You know, I love you. I'm just kidding with you when I say things or you know, or he was Incredibly sensitive towards and and I didn't see it at the time, you know, I'd be like it's okay get over it Don't be a baby and we got really good in the last 10 years of life of sitting down and saying, you guys should do this.

Sitting down and he would say, every six months I want us to sit down and say what we don't like about each other so we can work on it. And I say, really, how do we do that? And he's like, well, during that hour or two, we can't be mad at each other for whatever we say. And we have to take it and walk away and say, you know what, I'm gonna accept that.

I understand how you feel and I don't want you to feel that way. That's hard. It's hard to do. And how do you, what was the exercise to not be defensive? Well, it was hard. We just had a really practiced discipline and he was disciplined.

I wasn't, I'm the loose cannon. You know, I'm the loud one, the boisterous one, the one who was in charge. I'm... Let's do an exercise. Who's the loose cannon in this relationship? Ha! Me. It's Lauren and Lauren. Yeah. Yeah. It's Lauren and Lauren.

I just want to see where we're at with the self-awareness. Sorry I bring color into your life. I love it. Yes. Thank God she's bringing the color into your life. Sorry about gray. But he would say things like, I don't like when you always take your brother's side in the middle of a business meeting.

And I would say, don't be a baby, Jarek. Come on. Are you kidding me? It's ridiculous. You're the leader of this company. It's my brother. What do you expect? He's like, it really hurts me because I want to know, do you agree with me? I was like, yeah, he's like, well, then can you show it to me? So I started to change the way I spoke to him. And I would say things like, I understand how you feel,

I don't want you to feel that way. Let's work on that. And he felt seen. Even if I didn't agree with him, I changed the way I spoke to him and people around me saw that and it changed our relationship even better than what it was.

He sounds like really effective with how he's like, let's sit down and say what we don't like about each other in this hour and let's fix it. And that was hard for me. Yeah. Cause I just wanted to throw things or be pissed off, you know. Yeah. Throw a tantrum and... Yeah, you know, childish.

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You get 15% off your first purchase. Again, that's code skinny for 15% off your order results in 90 days or it's free. I feel like when you're in, I hope we have this in, it sounds like for sure you guys had this when you're in such a close relationship and you love each other so much, you can start to be liberal with words because you're in such a safe space. You are. You're in a safe space. You say things to people that you would never say to another-

Ever. ... colleague or friend because you'd... Because if you said it... It's almost absurdly, if you know if you said it to somebody else, even if they're a close friend of yours, it would potentially tarnish the relationship. But when you're in intimate relationships, you'll say things. So I always tell her all the time, I'm like, whenever we're having those fights, I'm like, talk to me as if you're talking to so-and-so person or someone you respect because you

would never say something like that. I love you guys. I love that you, yes, I know exactly what you're saying. And you're very much like JR. And she's very much like me and I love you for saying it because he's right. At the end of the day, I've learned it the hard way. I've learned it the hard way because I was the, you know, not by the way, Jared loved me

because I brought the color just like you did. She knows I'm not going anywhere. Of course. And so she feels, you know, you can take, and I'm not, listen, I'm not complaining, but I think again, if you have enough of that for a long enough period of time can be harmful. Of course.

And you know what's so great about it is that you understand that, that you say that, because it's true. And when you think about the kind of conversations when you know you can have such a safe space and you can say things that you would never think to say to in a million years to anybody but this person, which by the way, doesn't happen when people are married for 10 years. Sometimes they're not the one. You know what I mean?

Sometimes it's you. Right. There's not everybody's're not saying the real stuff. Sometimes it's you. Right. There's not everybody's going to be like you guys. They could be... How long have you guys been married? We've known each other since we were 12.

Oh my God. We've been married for, I don't know, a long time. Well, we got married in 2016, but we got together... You've been together your whole life, practically. Practically, but we had other liaisons. Oh my God, let that, we would have officially been together since I was 20 years old. I'm turning 38 in March.

I love that. But then when we were kids, we dated. But we've known each other. I mean, so I guess I've known her since. You've been in love with her your whole life. Well, listen, she. Well, I was his first blow job, so what's not to love? He got a blow job from me, and he was like, damn, bitch,

I don't need a blow job from anyone else but her. He's like, that's it. You have what? Hugglite and sinker, I'm done. Hugglite and sinker. Hugglite and sink bitch, I don't need a blow job from anyone else but her. He's like, that's it. You have what? Hope, glad and sick. I'm done. Hope, glad and sick. I'm done.

I don't know what it is, but she showed up at school in the sixth grade. And listen, I was probably- She looked so hot that you couldn't take it. I was like four foot two. I hadn't even grown up yet. She came in fully developed. Oh my God. So I had some little girlfriend at the time.

I was like, listen, I got to go. I got to go there. That's her. And then it must have stuck. It must have just stuck. That's her. And then it must have stuck. It must have just stuck. That's her. And you remember loving her that much then? I think it would, yes. I love that.

I think it was also a bit of a lust situation going on. First of all, it's not a lust because you're still with her, but still lust. Because right now, don't forget she's pregnant. Oh, her dad caught us in the closet when we were 12 years old together, naked. Stop. It was... Stop. That was messy. It was messy. You were messy. Oh, I love it. We was... Stop. That was messy. It was messy.

You were messy. Oh, I love it. We got in trouble. We got in big trouble. Mom said she's going to boarding school. Thank God you ended up marrying him. Her dad was pulling her out and I called my dad. I was like, I'm in real trouble. And all I heard on the other end of the phone was just laughter.

I just think this story is just everything. That's why I love you guys. Well, you guys are an inspiration with how you've worked together for so long. And I can say, I know this, he would be so proud of what you're doing at this moment with everything. To talk about it like this is incredible. I think this, it's just the journey of healing.

It's the journey of figuring out, because I really didn't think I could get through it. I thought if I could do this, I'll try my best to give it my best shot. You know, I've done it my whole life with him for 30 years, but let's see how it goes. But then I just heard him say, Lauren, come on, you've been doing this with me. It's not about the money. It's about who we can help get up and do it. And I did. And the more I did it, the more I built my confidence back up. And now I get in the mirror and I'm like, OK, Lauren, you're great.

Let's go to work today. Let's do it. You gotta show up for yourself. And you know, you have to reinvent yourself. You have to figure out like, nobody's gonna come to your rescue. You gotta call 911 on yourself. You gotta resuscitate yourself again.

You gotta bring yourself back to life. And I think I've really done a good job doing that. And I'm proud of myself. But I do know that the book is more about finding yourself again. Because you can't write a book about grief. Because I can't fix that for somebody. I can't fix it for me. It's going to be there forever.

You will always want that Lauren and JR back. You will always want the old days of Lauren and JR. But you have to realize that Lauren has this new journey and she's going to go on it. She's going to make it the best she can. And I think it's when, you know, my grandson wrote to Santa for Christmas, he wrote, Dear Santa, all I want for Christmas is the new Darth Vader helmet

and for my Mimi to be okay again without my bob-bob. Oh my gosh. That messed me up. And I said, I'm gonna do my best to show up for these kids and put a smile on my face. And I saw an interview where Amber, my daughter, had done an interview. And I think, you know, one of my friends,

like Alicia Keyser, somebody sent it to me. And it said, how are you doing? And she lost her dad. And she said, I didn't just lose my dad, I lost my mom too. And I realized at that moment, I had not been really present for their grief because I was dear Abby. I was always there for everybody.

The person that everybody called if they needed somebody, but I could not be fixed. I was unfixable for a long time. What were the things that pulled you out of that? Those two moments. Those two moments of Aiden writing that letter and Amber hearing that story that Amber said that she had lost her mom too. And I got back up and I wrote a chapter about her in there about how sorry I am I didn't see your grief

and I'm sorry I didn't acknowledge it. You know, and she was like organizing babysitting schedules and shit and calling all my friends. Alicia Keys was coming and spending the night on nights. Serena was coming, everybody was coming. I was like, on nights, Serena was coming, everybody was coming. I was like, my friends Mary, you know, everybody was coming. And I was like, I don't need a babysitter. I'm okay.

I can manage this. And I was miserable. I didn't want my whole life, everybody, I fixed everything. So I didn't want to ask for help, but I needed it. And I couldn't get it from therapists, because they were telling me, oh, just, you know, I couldn't find any tools from them. Not that they weren't good. I don't want to give that impression.

I just needed resources and I couldn't find any. And it wasn't until I said, you know what, I'm going to write this book and I'm going to start keeping a journal. And I started to realize by the end of that journal, I had written a book and I figured it would help me. It helped me. Maybe it would help others. And I just now have leaned on people and it's OK to ask for help. And I wasn't used to that. And I wasn't. I was used to keeping my circle so small, but afraid to ask.

And I started to ask. And, you know, I was always the friend that, you know, did things for everybody. And right after J.R. died, I'll never forget, Alicia Keys called me, said, listen to me. I'm going to organize J.R.'s celebration of life. You're not going to do a thing. You're not going to fly anybody in. You're not going to send any airplanes out for people. We're going to do it for you. Whoever wants to come will come. And it will be the most beautiful celebration of life.

And I'm going to orchestrate it. He won't pay for it. And it will be the most beautiful thing because he has been so giving, you have been so giving. And I walked in there and it was a moment that I will never forget. And because I needed it at the time, I needed that support and I didn't know how to ask for it.

And they gave it to me and it made the journey that much easier for me. So your first reaction would have been to like fly everyone in and organize it for everybody and make sure everyone was comfortable. Make it was just spectacular for him. And make sure it was great. But what she said is if they're really his friends.

If they love you. They'll be there. If they, yes, they'll be there anyway. You don't need to do a thing. And everybody was like, she was tough. She was telling us, you're gonna do this, you're gonna do this. And everybody was calming and going, you know,

like she's only given us like two minutes to speak and stuff and I was like, I don't wanna get involved. I was already overwhelmed. I was already dealing with so much and she took it on and I will never ever forget it at a time I really needed it. And Serena too, you know, I had reached out to Serena when I asked her to do. Serena came a lot.

She would come a lot. She suffered a pulmonary embolism. She was one of the few who survived. She discovered hers by working out. She was in her gym with her physical trainer. What does it feel like? Well, you don't know. Because we don't talk about it.

But it's like you take, you know, lose breath. You struggle with your breath, you feel like out of breath, tightness, redness around the skin, but we didn't think for one moment because he had this knee injury. This is where the blood clot was hiding. So we couldn't see it. She was working out. The physical trainer looked and said, you need to go. Because you just you don't know it, you just die. And she was in the gym.

She's lifting away physical trainer She tells the story so amazing physical trainer looked her and said you need to get the emergency room right now You're not gonna make it. Otherwise, you have a pulmonary embolism You got to go right now. She was such a high performer with such a high performing team. There's Likely wouldn't have caught it. Can you believe what do they do for it? Well, by the way, they there's a way to treat it They give you aspirin they can you know wait for it to dissolve, by the way, they, there's a way to treat it. They give you aspirin. They can, you know, wait for it to dissolve, but you have to be in a medical care.

Like, she was four months, I think, Serene. I can't remember exactly how long. Four months it took for it to totally dissolve. You have to make sure. Oh, no. She had not gone to the hospital that day. She said she would have. And she was supposed to go the day before to London, she said.

She said she canceled that flight. She said, had I before to London. She said she said she cancelled that flight she said had I not if I would have come back home like in a body bag like JR and So, you know, she was one of the lucky ones, you know, but she had she had saw me go through She had lost her sister in a drive-by she had no she knew what grief was like and and she really helped me on the journey of just Reminding me that we always will be together again. You have a beautiful story.

There's a lot of people that I'm sure follow you and admire you that look at the success you guys have had and, you know, put it on a pedestal and emulate it and want to follow in a similar path. What's something that maybe people misconceive about success and what comes with it? I think that they don't realize that it can be very lonely at the top. And I think that they also don't realize that there's so much more that goes into being successful as being an innovator. It's thinking ahead.

It's being smarter because you can have something today, but how many times or how many times do you hear about a company that's still around after 33 years? It's really hard to do that And that takes real effort real thought real teamwork You need to have the right team around you and we talked about this already and I think that people don't Understand that it's it can't be about money It can never be the scoreboard what it really has to be about is what the vision is

Where do I hope to go? What's the mission behind this? How many people can I help? Because if you're not helping people, what difference does it make? At the end of the day, what difference does it make? When I fell in love with JR, it had nothing to do with money. I fell in love with him because I felt like he made a difference in my life. And I feel like that's all that really matters. And when you do it for the right reason, it will happen automatically. That's why you guys have, in front of all of us, have grown up and become what you are.

Because when you do it for the right reasons, it's gonna happen. It's inevitable. You can't stop it. What I tell people is like- That's big, by the way. Don't forget that. Listen, everyone wants to do well financially, but it's-

Great advice. I almost feel like if that's your sole focus- Oh, you're never going to make it when you get there. It's also boring. First of all, if you're only focused on the figures, forget about it. It's not ever going to last. It should be a byproduct. If you're only focused on the figures, forget about it.

If your goal is to let me be a billionaire, what does that mean? Let me be a multimillionaire. What does that mean? How many people can we impact on the way? You know, Jerry should say to me in his will, it said it. He wrote it. He said, I don't care about having the most money. I don't care about having the most things. I care about affecting the most people.

That's all I care about. I said, Lauren, remember this for the rest of your journey when I'm not here. Some people collect cars. Some people collect art. We collect people. Let's just collect people. And isn't that what you do at the end of the day? That's why we do the show.

Don't you just collect people? When you look at your collection, it's pretty amazing. It's amazing to be able to talk to people like you and share all of the knowledge that you have with so many people. That's the best part of doing the show. You're the guys that are the best part about doing the show. I just want to be the facilitator. I love that, but it's so much more. I think like, you know, we've been fortunate to have some financial success. And at some point, to your point, how many things can you have that continue to be interesting?

And listen, there's a great quote that says, money only solves money problems. There's so much more to life. But I hope that everybody reaches their financial dreams and realizes there's so much more. And actually, over time, it becomes so much less interesting. It does. To impact people, to talk to people,

to expand your life becomes so much more fulfilling. I think the funny thing about money is is that when you have it, you realize how also it's a beautiful thing to be able to have the things you want but life is really simple when you don't have to deal with all the big things. So, you know, like even now in my life, I've really learned to try to simplify because I try to tell my kids like we don't need so many places. I'm not going to go by myself.

I'm not going to go. You're not going. You know, the places that we don't go, we shouldn't keep. Why? Why, Mom? You don't need the money. And I'm like, because it's my peace of mind. I wanna have my peace of mind. I wanna spend my life not worrying about those things and spend my time with you. I totally get what you're saying.

You know what I'm saying? The more, like I'm sure, the more houses that you have. The more things you have. The more problems, the more employees. The more people, the more things. And at some point you get to a place and, you know, Jerry used to say this, I'm gonna find a way to simplify for us.

I'm gonna find a way to simplify. And it wasn't so much about the things, it was the extra things that took our space and time. He wanted to have more time. He used to say, that's why he used to say to me, don't jump out of bed once you leave, I won't get you back till nighttime. And I didn't understand.

And the thing I think I miss the most is the pillow talk. You know, how much pillow talk do you guys have? I'm so curious. A lot. It's all night, isn't it? It's like for as late as you can do it, which we chatted up a lot. It's a beautiful thing. We chat so much. I have to put mouth tape on. Right. But I love that. That's why she made mouth tape.

I could kind of... JR was talking, you could have just put it in a deck. I would have loved the mouth tape. I can carry the whole conversation and just watch for the eye reaction. Yesterday I was talking like this. Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom. You're hilarious.

I can't, like... But think about it for a moment. Isn't it sometimes the best part of your day? You get in the bed. It better be the best part of yours. Is it your best part of your day? Well, and I think, like, so for couples that can figure out how to work together, which, as you know, it's not easy...

And very few of us do. But then later it's so rewarding because there's actual... I mean, not to say couples don't talk, but there's a lot to talk about. There's a whole lot to talk about. That's when we talk the most. We got on a plane last night to come to New York, and I was sitting there thinking,

it's late at night, it's one in the morning on a plane, I'm tired, I'm dehydrated, et cetera, et cetera. And I thought there's no one else that I would rather do this with, and I would never wanna do this just alone as I'm building. Like, it's fun to do it with your partner. Of course it is. It's rewarding. That's rewarding. That's what makes it worth the while.

It's not about the journey so much, it's just who you become on it. I feel like who is going to be able to date you after all this? I don't know. Oh, God. Well, I say to myself, I asked my daughter and my granddaughter recently, I was like, you know, everybody always asks me, you know, when do you think you'll ever date again? And I'm like, right now I'm learning to fall in love with myself again.

Yeah. And that's taken time. But my granddaughter said to me recently, she said, you know, Mimi, if you did that pop up would just hate you. He would hate you. He would come and haunt you. And Amber, I said, Amber, would you be okay? She said, I'd be traumatized.

I'm not going to lie. I want you to do what you want to do, but I would be traumatized. And I think like, I mean, people like Ruttman and, and Fat Joe and Jamie Foxx and all these guys would just never, ever go for it. You know, have all these big brothers who are like, turn off your DMs. Do not put your DMs on. You get DMs from a lot of guys. Yeah, I get strange DMs, you know, but I just turn them off. Believe me, these guys will pick up my phone and they're like,

turn off the DMs, Lauren. And I've learned to realize that, you know what I find so special about my life now is when I pick up new people, pick up my phone and they're like, turn off the DMs Lauren. And I've learned to realize that, you know what I find so special about my life now is when I pick up new people, pick up new friends. Yeah. And I feel like that's the greatest gift I have. And so I've fallen in love with me and my friends again and, and being there for them. And I tell everybody in my circle that this is the journey I want to go on with

you now. It's going to take a very, very, very special person. You have such a, I don't, I mean. He'd have to be so smart. I'm really turned on by intelligence. Same. Anything less wouldn't work for me. Sounds like a lot of checkpoints he's got to go through

with some of these people in their life too. The people, now her. Yeah, I mean, introduce him to me. I know, I know. I got my questions. Lauren, no, Lauren's going to be like, no, no. I don't think so. I just think you guys are just everything, but I just don't know. I don't know what the future holds.

That's the hard part. You know what I do daily now, and this is something Angie Martinez and I were talking about the other day? I've learned to rate myself two ways, and I always did this with J.R. J.R. was very good at it. I told you. I could go at the end of the day and I say, like, I want a divorce today. I want to kill you today. Or today was a great day and I love you. But I've learned to keep them separate and I didn't know how to do that before. What do you mean?

Meaning, every day at the end of the day, and I do this with my team, I say, rate yourself professionally today. Were you an eight? Were you a nine? Were you a ten? Were you a four? And then I rate myself personally. And you know, the other day I was at a two or three. I was down. I was feeling sad. And today is like an eight again. Good. And you can see growth that way. You can physically see growth. And here's the other good news. When you don't co-mingle them, you don't let one affect the other. So because sometimes if you have a shit day, personally,

and your day at work is fantastic, and you had a great, phenomenal, successful day, and you can see yourself on the journey, you're moving in the right direction, but it gets all screwed up by what happened to you personally. And then you punish yourself, and you're like, okay, I feel like I got nowhere. When you're going through this place that I've been,

the only way I know how to do it is to separate the two because then I can really see the growth. It's a personal inventory too. It really is a checkpoint. It's a check system. It's like a list. And so today I was like, I was coming up the elevator. I was thinking, today I'm an eight.

And I told Christian and my team when I was looking, it was like, I cannot wait to see them. I actually look forward to seeing you guys more than everybody I've talked to on this tour because I just think you guys are so much like us and so fun and so full of life that this is just the beginning for you. What a compliment. I got to keep you around. No, I just feel like it's amazing.

No, I just feel like a 10. Michael loves strong women. And so he just had two of the strongest women on the podcast. I don't think you could get stronger than you and Bethany. Bethany's incredibly strong. I love her. You and Bethany are like... She's great. She's so much fun. I love Bethany. I saw her outside and I was so happy to see her.

And she's great. And I think that's why you love Lauren. You're Lauren. I like dynamic women. I like, you know, like Frank Sinatra said... And they're not afraid. Yeah, Frank Sinatra said, like, what, it shouldn't be a staring contest, right? That's right. It shouldn't be.

And you know what? You have such a beautiful wife. Oh my. And she's so sweet and intelligent. She keeps showing your toes. That's true. Yeah. You couldn't live without her.

My hair's going gray. Look, she's looking at you. And I love that. I can't wait for my love note tonight. All right, you know what? You better get busy writing. She wrote 5,000. You better get busy writing.

I'll never let you look good. I want you to incorporate Chachi know? I wish I wrote more. I wish I wrote more. But now, Amber and I do this thing that we send each other voice notes all the time and save them. And, you know, she'll send me a video, you know, when she's getting on a plane to come see me or vice versa. Does she work within your company?

She does. She does. She has her own brand. She's super successful on her own. She makes her own money. And I always tell her, like, I'm always here for you. We got to interview her once. She's successful on her own. She makes her own money. And I always tell her, like, I'm always here for you. We got to interview her once. She's incredible. You know, she's a little dynamo powerhouse.

And I'm so proud of who she is and what she's become. And it's funny how the roles have had to reverse for a minute because, you know, I was always the caregiver for everybody. And, you know, she had to come in and be like, no, Mom, I'm going to do this for you. You're not going to be alone. I need to have peace of mind, too. I'm sure she's dynamic with both your personalities. Oh, the two of us together can be, you know, fire.

Where can everyone find your books, support what you're doing, pimp yourself out? I love you. Barnes and Nobles, Amazon, Target. You know, most everywhere where books are sold. And you can follow me on Lauren writing or at Instagram Facebook You'll watch this journey. We're coming in April. Oh, I can't come in the way I can't wait for you to come we're gonna come come stay with me because I've got plenty of places there Come everybody stays with me right now. Jimmy Fox is everybody's there. Everybody's so hospitable over there Every time we talk to somebody new that we meet the likes it's a big's a big staying here. Ask Isabella. There's always somebody between one of

our houses. So I get super nervous. I'm like, I'm a hotel. You are sensitive to that. I love people who have kids around me. You know, I love kids. Be careful what you wish for. No, no, I have three grandkids. We love it. But I have a guest house and I have a house and an apartment. we're in good shape. Okay, all right. We're in good shape, I can't wait to see you guys. You're amazing, thank you so much for coming on the show. I can't wait to see what's in store for you

in this next chapter. I can't wait either. Well, you guys are gonna be around. I can't wait for you to move to Florida. I'm coming to Miami.